#Healthy exes or polyamory

[sweetpumpkinmouse]

I have a revelation!

(This is a rant about certain Envy shippers and certain writing choices. No worries, it’s not a ship-bashing post!)

I think the one of the real reasons why I don’t like Envy as much as I wish to, is because people bend over backwards to mischaracterize/demonize characters in order for the relationship to even work. Not even working with the canon or trying to make an interesting story.

They mischaracterize V as a heartbroken, jealous sad girl who is sad that her property—I mean, former lover is in love with someone else. Just like any other shitty Olivia Rodrigo song.

Or they make N so hung up on his crush on V to the point where he’s flanderized to the sky and beyond.

It just puts a bad taste in my mouth.

I remember seeing this one comic where made N upset, and N is getting reminded of all the horrible things he’s been told, so V comforts him. Okay, standard, what’s the problem? The problem is that the characters that are shown is Cyn (makes sense) and UZI (what)! Why Uzi? That doesn’t make fucking sense! If it was J, then that would be accurate, but Uzi? Really?

I’m not done. There was an Envy Heather edit. Completely missed the point. No other words. Unlike the last example, it didn’t piss me off, just “did we even watch the same show?”

Same with Thuzi, and even Vuzi or Juzi in some cases. FUCKING CODEGOLD! And I think Nuzi and NUziV too, but to a lesser extent from what I seen.

I feel bad because I don’t want to hate the ship. I do see its merits and why people like it. I even follow creators or works that ship Envy or have it as the main focus. But by god, certain people make that so difficult sometimes.

This isn’t a problem specific to this ship or this fandom, IT’S EVERYWHERE AND IT DRIVES ME NUTS!

Like why strip the characters from their nuance and chemistry they already have in canon, just to turn them into bland archetype, or to demonize “the other woman”?

[r0semultiverse]

do you think I would piss off chronically online people if I told y’all I almost had sexual affairs with a GILF once? 😜 (REAL)

[figs-and-cigs]

In response to the "trad wife" who slipped into the polyamory tags:

Consider me a "trad wife". I'm a stay at home mom, married for a long time. I take care of the kiddo, the housework, most of the cooking. I bake bread and pies for the holidays, we have cutesy matching outfits for family photos. To an outsider we're a picturesque "normal" family.

My husband and I love each other, we're each other's best friends, partners. We're "satisfied" as you put it but more than that, were extremely happy together. We've built a life together, raise a kiddo, have a lovely home.

We're also non-monogamous and practice polyamory. Not because "I'm not enough," or because "he's not enough". It's not because we're unhappy, or bored, or have a desire to "cheat".

To put it simply, we love love, and we love people. We love intimate relationships. With each other, with friends, with people who are more than friends. We simply chose not to put restrictions when it comes to how other relationships evolve.

I hope you're happy in your monogamous marriage. That's great. Wonderful. Everyone deserves happy, healthy, wonderful relationships.

But to accuse our relationship dynamics of being "toxic" or "unveiled cheating" is pure ignorance on your part. To say it's women's way of having "back up" options, is degrading.

Cheating would imply dishonesty or unfairness. The reality is we're honest, communicate about everything, prevent unfairness and navigate all the same things most relationships do.

My marriage is enough, and we're secure enough in our relationship to not be afraid of how other relationships may evolve. Whether it's simply a friendship, a sexual exploration, or a deeply intimate connection. I love that my husband is a wonderful, loving, funny human being and that others can experience those wonderful parts of him. I'm a loving, creative, sexual, playful, caring person, and I love that I can share those parts of myself with others - freely, without judgment, without fear of losing my husband because of it.

My relationships can grow and evolve freely. The only difference in my monogamous relationships was that I had to deny any deep feelings I may have had for another person - I couldn't express my love for my best friend of 15 years. My monogamous (now ex) husband at the time got angry when I verbally expressed my feelings to him about her. He became jealous, suspicious, and angry any time I talked to my friend. I never cheated on him, and I never have or would cheat on anyone.

I've since realized I want the freedom to tell friends and people I'm close to that I love them, that I think they're beautiful. I want to be able to hug them without being accused of betraying someone's trust. I want to be able to kiss them if it authentically feels right in the moment - to express my love in any way that feels authentic. And I want my (now) husband to have that freedom too, without fear of me resenting him for it.

Monogamy maybe right and wonderful for you. Non-Monogamy and Polyamory are right for me.

You know what they say about assumptions?

[amyrlinegwene]

Some thoughts:

The Wheel of Time is a piece of literature and it’s okay for people to interpret things in different ways or have the text resonant differently for you than another fan. And that even if you find some interpretations/ships/character arcs that people are interested in distasteful, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you are right and the other person is wrong, and vice versa.

Sure, some opinions might be based more in canon than others, but RJ was an author that was deliberate in leaving room for ambiguity, misunderstanding, and critique in his characters, relationships, plots, and cultures. He also was creating a framework of the world in WoT that might have not completely reflected his own beliefs but rather an attempt to create an interesting world and power system. Canon should of course be the stable foundation of any fandom and it’s important to remember what is canon and what is not. But is also important to remember that canon can be interpreted or critiqued in many different ways.

If someone is not actively taking a bad faith approach to the text (ex: blatantly misogynistic takes on Egwene, Elayne), I feel like we have to allow multiple interpretations of the text because two contradictory views can be true at once, especially in a work as complex as the WoT.

Some examples:

- RJ’s tendency to pair women characters up with a heterosexual partner by the end of the series can be critiqued for being misogynistic. However you could argue that he was trying to fit the theme of balance between genders. You can also find a particular ship out of these pairings interesting and want to explore it more through analysis or fic. ALL three of these things can be true. You can also not agree with some or any or all of these points without completely invalidating that other fans see it this way.

- Some fans find polyamory representation they relate to in Rand having three girlfriends/wives. Other fans critique it as a misogynistic trope. Both interpretations can be valid.

- Similarly, in different wot fandom spheres Elayne and her relationships are seen different ways. Some fans insist she’s straight, some that she’s bisexual, and others that she is a lesbian who experienced compulsory heterosexuality in her relationship with Rand. These fans all have their own reasons (namely, in order: her only canon relationship is with Rand; her first sister bond and relationship with Aviendha can be interpreted as romantic in addition to her relationship with Rand; and some find the difference in chapters/care/detail that RJ gave Elayne and Avi’s relationship compared to hers with Rand to be a compelling argument for comphet). The text and a healthy fandom allows for all of these interpretations, even if you may personally disagree with some of them.

In short, consensus in fandom is great, but allowing for differing opinions and healthy dissent is better, especially with a text as rich as the Wheel of Time.

[xxnomadsxx]

So, besides Broppy. What'd be the most likely(or healthy?) Ship in the nomade AU for branch?

I mean, it's cannon he is attractive and adorable. (Is that still cannon in this AU? Do trolls find the faral mentally ill cat look attractive?)

Anyway, this is a weird question-

Honestly it’d be Creek (they would be ex’s once his traitorism comes to light) The relationship would be lowkey kinda toxic (Creek is basically using Branch, while Branch is completely unaware that he was even in a relationship and thought they were just really good friends) Branch is heartbroken and enraged when he finds out he’s been lied too for the past couple years.

If Broppy wasn’t a thing (or if poppy was cool with polyamory) it’d probably be Synth and Branch too (I mean come on they’re adorable together 🥰)

Also yea he’s still attractive (by troll standards) and still absolutely adorable (once you get to know him he is basically a cat) He is just this pathetic mentally ill wet cat and the trolls who do like him have a “I can fix him” mentality.

[polyamzeal]

My first polyamorous relationship recently came to an end and I'm still reeling from it, I guess I'm wondering if you have any sage wisdom to throw into this whirlwind ?

I started seeing this guy while he was on and off with his life partner of four years, until they broke up for the 'sixth and final time'. We had a talk at this point and clarified that neither of us were looking to fill that primary partner gap for the time being and I was aware he would be healing for a time, but we both stated that we were invested in our relationship, saw it as something good and healthy, and that we wanted to put work in to continue making it as good as possible. Things were really great for almost a month after that and his ex well and truly seemed out of the picture to the both of us.

Then suddenly one day his ex decided she wanted to get back together monogamously (after four years of polyamory) and he immediately informed me that was just - happening.

Our relationship only lasted four months and he loves her and thinks this is the only way to still be able to spend his life with her, and has belief in this choice because she broke off a two year relationship for this, but I feel like this is really terrible. He seemed committed to polyamory as long as I've known him and never mentioned any hopes otherwise, and the decision was made really suddenly. I got incredibly upset with him and cut him out of my life and now I'm in the stage of trying to puzzle over how much of this situation is morally bad on his part and how much is just really unfortunate circumstance? I don't really know how to react to this, just heartbroken and confused! Any words are helpful 😅

First off, that really sucks! I am really sorry you went through that and I hope you have been healing well.

When I first became polyamorous I had this very naive idea in the back of my head that all my future relationships would last forever. I would just keeping adding more partners since nobody had a reason to breakup if cheating and other people wasn't going to break up relationships. Obviously that was foolish! But after those first few polyam breakups I really appreciated the new perspective on breakups I had formed over time. In monogamy, a breakup is almost always seen as a "failure" because the goal was to spend forever together monogamously. For me at least with polyamory it felt easier to see a relationship as "Good for the time when it needed to be and over when it was no longer needed." I became much better at being grateful for the good memories and everything I learned about myself from that relationship without only focusing on the bad of why it didn't work out.

Change is hard. It always is for everyone. But I do feel like with polyamory we are a little more accepting to people and relationships naturally changing over time. That we go through 'eras' in our life and so little in life is actually eternal. I hope you take the good parts of that relationship with you into future relationships and now you are better prepared to handle similar bad aspects of the relationship. I wish you good luck.

[sugary-sheep]

polyamory is beautiful because you can live your life focused completely on love without being inherently isolated. abusive, isolating polyamorous relationships do exist, but like. if you invest your whole life into romance as a monogamous person you will be alone with a single other person. with polyamory you kind of just naturally get connected with like. crushes and metamours and metamours' crushes and telemours and a higher quantity of friendly exes etc. and even if you only have one partner yourself, only pour yourself into one person (either monogamous or can't get bitches), normalizing polyamory naturally trends towards building a community around you, while firmly enforced monogamy will by default leave you alone. which is to say i think healthy, exclusively monogamous lifestyles have a way higher skill floor.

[alexissara]

Happy Day of Visibility for Non-monogamy

[Image From Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko!]

Today is Day Of Visibility for Non-monogamy, I am polyamarous, I've written about it a few times in recent days so feel free to ya know search Polyam on my blog and you'll see plenty of writing if you want more but today is gonna be completely personal chat. So strap in for my asexual lesbian polyamarous life.

I personally attempt to be as non hierarchical as possible, I am engaged [and have been] to my Fiancé whom i've dated since I was in Freshmen year of high school so obviously we have tons of history and in these 15 years of love i've never felt like I needed monogamy in my relationship with them. I've dated a set of long distance partners for around 8 years now and I love all of those women and wouldn't replace them for the world, we spend hours and hours every single day talking. I had a recent ex girlfriend whom I almost dated for 2 years before our break up and I have a non traditional subby dommy kinda thing going on with a really sweet girl that's been going on for over a year now.

My Fiancé has been dating another amazing girl who I think is amazing [as a friend] for like 5 years now and she has a boyfriend who is married to another woman but he lives with her. My Girlfriend has been dating another girl who is like one of my best friends ever for a lot of years now too. I have a pretty good relationship with the whole polycule and I am really happy to be able to not just have all this love but to have all this love for my partners. It's super fun to see my partners date and fall in love and explore themselves in new ways, it's fantastic.

I would say my approach is mostly a relationship anarchist style in that I let relationships be what they are as opposed to feeling like a strict line from what interactions with people of particular titles can be. That said when we decide on a title I do take them very seriously and want to respect when a relationship has elevated into something clearly romantic between me and those other people. I love, love but I also understand that I only have so many hours in the day and I want to make sure I am treating everyone well.

Non-Monogamy can be a little bit of work but relationships can be too. At first I was really bad at polyamory, I thought you had to be in a relationship with everyone dating everyone and tried to like force that kind of dynamic which neither of my partners appreciated and they sat me down to clear it up with me that they weren't interested in each other romantically. I also worked to stop comparing people to each other. It had always been that different partners had given had given me different things in my life.

Two years ago I was really sick, like constantly in and out of the hospital sick. During that time I only grew to appreciate my polycule even more. Having my loved ones all in a group chat giving each other updates, having people be awake at different hours so I couldn't be alone and depressed and feeling horrible. I felt so lucky to have so much love and to be showered in that affection all of them trying their best to help take care of me. Honestly, I don't know if my mental health could have been as okay as it was in such a terrible state with that constant affection from everyone.

I hope we can live in a world that becomes more accepting of non monogamy and that we have more rights. My partners matter so deeply to me and I couldn't chose between them. Like a body needs a bunch of different vitamins I need a lot of different love to stay healthy. This is who I am, this is who my heart is, this is me. To every other non monogamous person out there, your not alone, your seen, your loved and we have each other if we don't have anything else.

[snoopledrooplecheesedoodle]

yandere Tiziano and Squalo x Ex girlfriend reader

Order up! *ding*

Yandere Tiziano and Squalo x Ex girlfriend reader

Art's not mine, couldn't find the artist but let me know if you know. Also, polyamory can be healthy and beautiful so don't hate, communicate.

Contains: Swearing, violence, mentions of sex

Love was something you hoped for.

You were by no means a hopeless romantic, but the thought that someone or something may love you was too tempting to ignore.

Now you bitterly acknowledge your mistake. As you thought you loved someone. Or better yet two someones.

They were beautiful, painfully so. You could acknowledge that as you packed your bags hastily. You knew your heart wouldn't be able to heal quickly from the betrayal it faced that day ...

You were excited that fateful summer day. It marked the beginning of your relationship with Tiziano and Squalo. Your anniversary! You were positively glowing at the thought of coming home and preparing dinner for your two loving and amazing boyfriends. The entire time at work you distracted like the young girl in love you were. Your boss Rosario, an older woman and head librarian at Vallicelliana Library smiled gently at you through her spectacles.

"Any special plans tonight?" Rosario asked. You smiled dreamily as you crooned. "Yes, it's my anniversary with my partners." Rosario raised an eyebrow before turning back to her work. "Do you mean those handsome men that are often hanging off each other that ask for you occasionally?" You smiled nodding your head eagerly. "Yep, those are my Tiziano and Squalo." Rosario's face soured slightly at your dreamy state. She saw how those men looked at you, with boredom. Like you were some kind of chore for them. Compared to how lovingly they stared at each other, it was sobering for Rosario and saddening for you. You were wearing rose-tinted glasses and Rosario didn't want to be the one to rip them off, but she also didn't want you getting hurt in the long run. She looked back at you who was spinning around the library while taking stock and sighed. This was going to be difficult.

"(Y/N) mia bambina, may I give you a small bit of advice?" You hummed and turned around to face your boss, stars in your eyes. Wincing, Rosario readjusted her glasses. "Sometimes in life we think we love someone very much ... and that they love us back. However, what you think may be love may be the other person using you for ... convenience." You furrowed your brow confused, who was she talking about? Rosario noticed your confusion and sighed before turning back to her work. "I'll finish inventory bambina, why don't you go home early?" Your eyes lit up brightly as you bounced on your heels like a child. "Grazie Donna Rosario!" "Prego mia bambina..." Rosario quietly responded as you ran off into the summer sun. She hoped it wouldn't end as horribly as she thought.

You eagerly approached the lavish apartment complex you lived in. On your meager salary, you would barely afford to live in the luxurious city of Rome. Your boyfriends told you not to worry your pretty little head about it and that they would take care of everything. You never knew what their jobs were as they would often deflect or change the subject, but you didn't really mind. You were just happy to be theirs' and that they were yours. Your lovely Tiziano with his long blonde hair and dazzling amber eyes and your handsome Squalo with his amber curls and ocean blue eyes. Approaching the door, you brought out your key and unlocked it. You were ready to change into something more comfortable and then prepare the anniversary meal. Entering the house, you paused as you closed the door. What you heard made you blush.

Moaning

Your lovers were already home and were getting it on without you. You blushed at the thought of your boyfriends naked together without you. You had lingerie prepared for tonight, but you supposed you all could start now. Silently you walked over to the door to the collective bedroom and peeped through the door. Squalo had Tiziano pinned to the bed, and they were making out. You were going to enter the room when Squalo pulled away and looked down at Tiziano. "Tiziano, when are we going to get rid of her?" What? Who? Tiziano pulled the piece of hair that stuck to his sweaty forehead out of the way and leaned into his lover. "Tesoro relax, she's not here to bother us. We'll tell her as soon as she gets home." When she gets home? You leaned in closer to the door. They wanted to get rid of you. Why? Squalo laughed a little and sat up embracing Tiziano. "Good I can't wait to get rid of her, she's been nothing but dead weight." No. "Yes Squalo. (Y/N) has been a fun little experiment, but I think it's time we move on with our lives." Tiziano sighed and moved over to Squalo before crawling on top of him. You couldn't watch or listen to any more of this. The moaning, the dead weight, the fun little experiment, it was all too much for you to handle. You shook with anger, embarrassment, and sadness. How could they be so cruel? How could you be so stupid to believe them? Every kiss. Every I love you. Every passionate night. It meant nothing to them.

You meant nothing to them.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you remembered that horrible night. How you cried bitter tears into a hotel pillow, unable to look at your ex-lover's faces. You had snuck back in your shared apartment and grabbed what little stuff you owned. Left every gift they had bought you, they meant as much as you, so they were worthless. You thought bitterly to yourself as you wrote a note on the back of a photo on the fridge of the three of you in the front of the Colosseum. You poured your heart out one last time for them before leaving.

You called your mother telling her the news, that you broke up with your lovers and had nowhere to go. Being the amazing woman she is, (sorry if your mother is not), she allowed you to come back home until you could get back on your feet. You were forever grateful for you sweet mother's generosity in times of need. Unfortunately, that meant you'd have to move back to Sardinia, which meant you'd have to find work again. You went to Rosario and told her your situation. She, of course, supported you fully and embraced you as a final goodbye, wishing you luck in your future. You smiled and felt a little lighter knowing there were people in your back corner there to support you.

Arriving home, you were surprised to see your whole family back at your mother's small casa. Their empathy and full support of your decision was almost enough to make you cry. Your nonna made a whole plate of Seadas (they are an Italian pastry from Sardinia and look fabulous) just for you. It warmed your heart to see such love and support coming from your family, and you knew in your heart that you would be okay.

Months later...

Squalo was conflicted. He thought this was the best decision they had made in terms of the relationship. However, something felt off. When you didn't return, he personally didn't care. He was tired of having to share Tiziano with you, and now Tiziano was his. Only his. Life carried as normal but with just the two of them. There were traitors to exterminate, rivals to kill, rebellions to quell. Mafia life was rough but paid good money. However, when they came home there was no home cooked meal. That's perfectly normal, we'll just go out to eat! Then there were those times where he would make a joke and Tiziano wouldn't laugh. No laugh of tinkling bells at his stupid joke. Fine with me, it sounded more like a donkey compared to Tiziano's laugh. Tiziano... sweet Tiziano seemed to be getting more distant with the day. Intimacy was at a near zero and he looked pained when Squalo leaned in for a kiss. That was something Squalo couldn't deal with.

"Carino what's wrong?"

Tiziano was riddled with guilt. Ever since you left, he felt a sinking feeling in his chest. He thought he wanted you gone so that Squalo could be all his. He thought you were just a fling that got too clingy. An experiment. A fad. However, with each day you were gone he realized a horrible sinking truth.

He missed you.

Missed your smile, your laugh, your voice. How it felt to hug you, kiss you, and make love to you. When he and Squalo were in bed together, it felt awkward, clunky. He tried to distance himself from such thinking, but nothing worked. He was losing sleep over the issue. How would you take his news? Would you want him back? Or would you scorn him for the pain he caused you? How would Squalo react? He clearly seemed happy you were gone, often joking about it, which caused Tiziano to frown.

When being confronted with his stoic behavior Tiziano smiled in a practiced way before pecking Squalo's cheek.

"Nothing Tesoro, I've just been stressed about work. That's all."

Work. Ah right, how could he forget? Being in the mafia had no room for weakness, but he faltered once. A target looked like you which almost cost Squalo and him their job when he let the girl get away.

"Tiziano, I know that is bullshit. Please tell me the truth dear." Squalo's patience was running thin. Was Tiziano not in love with him anymore? No, he wouldn't allow it. Tiziano looked at his lover sympathetically before looking at the cold coffee set at his chair.

"You won't make fun of me carino?"

"Never my one and only."

Tiziano sighed before looking at Squalo once more

"I miss (Y/N)."

"Bwahahaha!"

Squalo couldn't help laughing and he couldn't help crying afterwards. This was all so simple yet complex. He thought he wanted (Y/N) gone but he too was missing the (h/c) who snared their hearts. Tiziano was angry at first, but seeing the pain in his lover's eyes he knew Squalo felt the same way.

"How do we get her back Tiziano? Ugh I feel so stupid!"

"Patience Squalo, we'll get her back. We just need to come up with a plan."

The duo stares at each other for a while before grinning evilly. The same thought in their minds.

(Y/N) would come back even in they had to drag her back because...

(Y/N) was theirs

Breaking up with Tiziano and Squalo was probably the best decision you've made in a long time. You got connected back with your family, you enrolled in school again, and were now pursuing the life you wanted. You worked at a nearby library to help you pay for college. The pay was way better due to your level of experience, and you had a more flexible schedule. Sure, you missed Rosario and some friends you made in Rome, but you think moving back to Sardinia reenergized your soul!

"(N/n) are you okay?"

Oh, that was right you were on a date right now with a really nice guy! Alessio Vargas. He would often come to the library you worked at and ask for help. He was a student at the same university who wanted to become a marine biologist. He asked about book recommendations, and you would always supply. Soon the two of you started talking about other things besides books. Turns out he didn't need you help he just wanted to talk to you and take you out. The first time he asked you said no, after all you were recovering from a bad relationship. He was okay with that, and you continued being friends. Finally, after months of getting to know him, you asked him out and he said yes.

"I'm fine caro, just a little nervous. This is my first date in a while." You sheepishly admit. Great now he'd think you're a loser. Alessio laughed and placed a hand on yours.

"This is my first date ever." Your eyes grew wide at his declaration.

"Really?! But you're so handsome!" Alessio laughed once more in his kind way and readjusted his wide rim glasses.

"Well I haven't been interested in anyone besides you."

You blushed at the thought and smiled. A handsome guy that was interested in you and only you. You were open to polyamorous relationships but since your last one went south, you thought you'd give monogamy a try. So far it was pretty solid, you weren't settling down quite yet, but you were having fun.

You came back from your date feeling lighter than a feather. Alessio was such a gentleman and was understanding the whole time. After dinner you walked on the beach and Alessio kissed your hand. Your hand! When you asked why he stated that "I knew kissing your lips would be too much for a first date, so I'll settle for your hand." Ah! He's so perfect!

While you were giggling like a teenager in love your phone buzzed in your pocket. Was someone calling you? You didn't recognize the number but picked it up anyways. "Hello?"

"Hello bambina do you have a minute?" It was Rosario and she didn't sound good. "Rosario what's wrong?" Horrible coughing continued on the other side. Oh no, just when things were starting to get better this happened. "Bambina listen ... I have only days to live these-illnesses have become severe and I need help- staying comfortable in my last days." You raised your eyebrow; something doesn't seem right. "When do I need to come over?" There was a pause and then an answer. "As soon as possible." You sighed and stared at the ceiling. You suppose you could afford to visit your old employer in her final days. Who are you kidding the woman was like a grandmother away from home to you!

"Alright I'll come."

On the other end of the line Rosario was choking back tears as the two men she feared were smiling evilly at each other. "You did well Rosario, we just need you for a little while longer and you'll be free as a bird." Squalo spoke up while Tiziano nodded and sat in the chair across from the elderly librarian. The two had found her at work and forced her to call her old employee. She didn't know what they wanted with (Y/N) but the look in their eyes shook her to the bone.

Obsession

Pure darkness and desire swirled in the eyes of the men, and made Rosario shake with fear. "You make me sick, what on Earth do you plan to do with (Y/N)?" Tiziano stood up and grabbed the elderly lady's scarf, pulling her over the desk. "What we plan doesn't involve you, just know she'll be in good hands." Squalo smiles and laughs at the older woman's misfortune. Tiziano grins before shoving her back in her seat. "Not like you could tell the police since my stand Talking Head has control of your tongue." These men were insane and dead set on getting you back for whatever sick reason they had. Rosario hoped you wouldn't come back to Rome because you would fall right into their trap.

Rome... your old stomping grounds. Back from the days you gave up on your dreams to be with two men who didn't even love you. Well, maybe they did at one point, but it was all in the past now. All you needed to do was provide support and care for Rosario and never come back to this hell hole ever again. You felt your feet become heavy with each step you took, as emotions came flooding back. You felt weak, powerless, useless. No! You were none of those things. You were a smart, strong, and independent woman on her way to a degree and a new boyfriend. You got this, nothing could stop you.

You were (Y/N) (L/N) for Christ's sake!

After the little pep talk in your head, you decided to call Rosario to get her address. Then you would get some of her favorite pastries and bring them over for her to enjoy. It was the least you could do. With that in mind you walked to the nearest pâtisserie and called the number Rosario used last time.

"Hello?" Good she was still alive. "Hey, Donna Rosario, I was wondering where you lived?" "Oh right, my bad bambina. I'll send you, my address." Good. "I bought you some sfogliatellas, your favorite." You heard a sigh of frustration that sounded a bit masculine on the other end of the line. "Donna, is someone with you?" You asked, suspiciously. This whole situation was too much for you. Being back in Rome, your suddenly terminally ill boss, and now you were hearing other voices. "No, I'm alone." A quick reply from the other end made you flinch from the internal whiplash. You had a bad feeling of something terrible happening. Clutching the bag of pastries you tentatively took a look at your phone. It was the address followed by a message.

We'll be waiting for you cara~

It was a mistake coming back and you knew it. It was a trap, and you came like some dumb dog with you tail wagging. You didn't know who we were, but you had a good idea of who it was. The mafia. Donna Rosario must have gotten into trouble with the mafia and wanted you to bail her out. What could Donna Rosario have done to piss the mafia off? You didn't know. Deep down you wanted to help the poor old woman because Donna didn't deserve it. Well at least the Donna you knew didn't deserve it.

The house she had was on one of the older streets in Rome. She wasn't rich but the house was impressive for someone of her means. You walked through the garden in the front yard to her door. It was already open, like someone expected you to be there. Chills went down your spine as you went through the door. "Donna Rosario?" You called out to the empty home. Silence. Such an interesting thing. There is good, wholesome, peaceful silence. Then there's deadly silence that looms like the grim reaper. It takes the air out of your lungs and brings fear into your every nerve. Everything in your body was telling you to go. To get out of there and run. You turned to leave.

"(Y/N)?"

Donna Rosario was so faint and frail sounding. Nothing like the vibrant and lively older woman you knew. You grit your teeth, knowing it wasn't right to leave this older woman vulnerable. You turned back around and called out once more. "Donna where are you?" "I'm in my bedroom bambina." You walked to one room and anxiously opened the door. Bathroom. Closet. Then a guestroom. Finally, you made it to the bedroom. No one was in there. "Donna are you sure you're in there?" Silence. "Donna Rosario?" Rustling could be heard in the closet. Aha! She's hiding in there. You march over to it a swing it open. "Donna what the big ide-AH!"

description of gore: (if you don't like skip to later or don't read further)

You've been warned

Donna Rosario was hung by the cord that turned on the light. Her mouth was wide open, and her tongue was ripped out of her mouth. Slash marks were found across her chest and arms. Blood dripped down into a pool of water that lay below her feet. You gagged at the gory sight. You dropped the bag of pastries in fear and horror. Backing up you stepped on something squishy. Looking down you couldn't hold back your bile. You stepped on Rosario's tongue. You threw up all over Rosario's nice white carpet. Who was sick enough to do this? Why?

end of gore

You needed to get out of here quickly, the killer might still be in the house. Running out of the bedroom you ran to the front door. The door was closed. You turned the knob. Locked. You desperately pounded on the door, tears streaming down your face. You slammed your full body weight on the door, but it refused to budge. "No where to run bambina except into our loving arms." That voice, no it couldn't be. "Squalo be patient she isn't exactly happy to see us here." No, no, no. You kick at the door hopping to escape. What do they want? They kicked you out of their lives so why are they here?

"Aww Tiziano but don't you miss the feeling of her softness?" The voices got closer and closer. You felt trapped like a caged animal. They murdered Rosario maybe they wanted to kill you too. "Stay away from me! You-you murderers!" "I do miss her softness, but I don't really miss her mouth. At least not right now." Tiziano spoke as the duo's footsteps drew closer and closer. You had to find some kind of weapon. Something! Anything! You noticed the fireplace and grabbed the fire poker ready to stab their eyes out. You weren't going down without a fight.

"Hey cutie."

"GAHHH!" You ran at the ginger man in front of you aiming for his face. You were not a fighter, so he dodged easily. He grabbed you and twisted it behind your back, pulling you into his chest. You yelped in pain and dropped the fire poker. You weren't going down just yet. You fought with all your might: kicking, screaming, biting, punching any bit of flesh you could find. "Aww our bambina wants a hug Tiziano." He squeezed you hard, causing you to choke. Tiziano walked in the room to see the commotion. He covered his mouth with his hand and snorted at the sight. What was wrong with these psychos acting like this was normal? Like they didn't kill your boss and aren't currently keeping you hostage in your boss' house.

"Squalo be gentle she's quite fragile." Tiziano takes you from Squalo's arms and whispers in your ear. "Struggle and I'll rip your arms off." You stiffen at your ex-lover's words. "Why?" Was all you could say as tears came pouring out of your eyes. Tiziano looks down at your tear-stained face and coos. Wiping away some of the tears he responds. "Why because you stole something from us when you left." Panic filled your heart at Tiziano's words. Steal? What did you steal? Seeing your panicked face both Tiziano and Squalo chuckle before leaning in. "You stole our hearts bambina." Squalo responds lovingly. Tiziano pulls you closer and stares at you with his amber eyes. His words were the last you hear before your world went dark "Now it's time you pay for it."

Alessio sighed and gripped his phone harshly. He couldn't understand why you weren't picking up. It's been a few weeks ever since your trip to Rome and your family was starting to get worried. He was worried.

The number you are calling you are unable to reach right now, please leave your message after the beep. BEEP

"Hello? (Y/N)? It's been weeks now and you haven't responded to any of your parents' calls. Or my calls. Cara we're worried for you, alone in the city, near your exes. I trust you're not back with them but come back to Sardinia. Your family misses you. I miss you. I've collected your homework at the academy for you, so don't worry about it. Please, please come back. This isn't like the woman I've come to know. I love you...

BEEP

Well if this wasn't complete garbage please let me know. I might write a part 2 for this but that will have to wait a little while. Thank you for interacting with me and please follow for more.

[tea-and-secrets]

im afraid im never getting over my old situationship. hes definitely the "one that got away" for me. im happily married now and i mean like really happliy, i wouldnt change what ive got now for anything in the world. but this ex of mine and i just had some really powerful chemistry, until he ghosted me for his shitty ex at the time. since then we've only had a handful of times together and it was always intense and at one point almost really fucked things up for me with my now-husband. anyways. ex-situationship is poly and so am i, and for a long time he couldnt hold down a relationship because he'd inevitably cheat and was just generally not practicing healthy or kind polyamory. and he and his new girl just had an anniversary and while i am genuinely happy for him and for both of them and they seem really sweet together, there's always this part of me that just screams "why wasn't i good enough?? i never wouldve tried to keep you or tie you down as long as you always came back to me". like i truly never even wanted an exclusive relationship with him OR to even necessarily to be his primary partner. i just wanted to be someone he could always come back to and feel safe with and share a loving space with. and we're actually still friends and im mostly over all this because again, im happily married and totally fulfilled in my relationship but still. there's all this pain in me over what could have been. and a feeling that if i had just communicated my self better and more clearly, we couldve had something lifelong and really important to both of us. and now its tricky because i know my husband doesnt like him much and also ex-situationship only talks to me when hes single anyway so i probably wont hear from him for a while. and i probably should just stop talking to him anyway because of *gestures vaugely* all this. idk. its hard to be a person with so much love to give. and its hard to know that even though i have all this love to give, it wont always be received the way i want it to be. alas.

.

[jinxpologist]

i swore off polyamory after my ex was a piece of shit abt it and we never really talked or communicated at all so i thought it just wasn’t for me, but im gonna be real if i was given a chance to actually try it in a healthy way id be very down. just throw me in a polycule and see what happens yk

[morimakesfanart]

Sindria's Prophet #35

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [Intermission] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34]

[AO3] [wattpad]

*Mori has an emotional flashback through the 1st half, Self blame *There's a multi paragraph summary of the breakup with my ex fiancé. Coerced polyamory does not reflect healthy polyamory

~POV Mori~ As soon as Sinbad picked me up I felt a wave of relief that I would get back to the Palace safely. Then I realized I could smell him and it finally clicked in my head what I had agreed to. And just like that I lost the ability to perceive how much time was passing as he carried me back.

I felt Sinbad's voice through our contact as much as I heard it. "Are you really going to hide the whole way back?"

"Mhmm!" He smelled good. If it wasn't for his metal vessels pressing into me, I'd be extremely comfortable. This was too good to be true! How was any of this allowed to happen?? He has refused to use marriage politically for over a decade even though it's the strongest method for a Kingdom to guarantee peace between different countries which is his entire life's mission. That's how much he hates the idea of getting married. Why would that King want people to think we were together?? The only way this made any sense was if Sinbad had somehow actually fallen in love with me! This was fanfiction, right? So anything was possible? I was allowed to be a little greedy? It took all of my will power to not wiggle my feet.

What could possibly attract him to me romantically? He called me 'Beautiful.' No, he's met many beautiful people around the world, and he was never romantically interested in any of them. Was it because I can feel the waves? I definitely get the feeling that he views me differently because of that. If it makes him see me as an equal that wouldn't be a bad starting point for a relationship... But he sees being able to feel the waves as something special.

There was a sharp paint in my chest. Regardless of why, if he does really feel that way about me, I have no way to live up to his expectations. Sinbad expects greatness. I already know how that ends! 'I need to tell him I changed my mind and to put me down, but-but-' I could feel his warmth. Just like on the ship, I felt distinctively safe in Sinbad's arms, and I was actually fully conscious to enjoy it this time! 'I don't want him to let go! But I can't handle this right now! Why can't I just be happy??' My heart beat was already creeping up my throat.

Sinbad invited me to enjoy the moment with him. "And here I was hoping I could finally give you my full undivided attention."

The reference to my new rule told me to disprove the hope that was straining my damage heart. I spoke past my hands, "That's only because I'm the only available option right now." I needed to shut this feeling down asap for my own safety. How could I think he developed feelings for me when he is the Womanizer of the Seven Seas??

"That's not true." His warm tone was so genuine I believed him. "I've wanted to have you all to myself since I first saw you this morning." The waves were adding the exact meaning to his words that I was afraid would be there. "But every time I had a chance, you left before I could talk to you." My stomach went cold. This is why I had been avoiding him. "I actually wanted to follow after you the first time you left for the festival." He sighed and I couldn't breathe. "If Hina hadn't distracted me while I was following after you, I know we would have spent the whole night together."

I took a few slow breaths through my hands before I could respond, and when I did I could hear the growing desperation in my voice. "Why do you suddenly want to strengthen the rumors?" I knew the reason. "Who in their right mind would believe you're in love with me when you asked me to join a bunch of call girls only a few hours ago!?" Sinbad changed his mind about romance? No. I knew this pattern. Even if he loved me now it was only a short term novelty. He will break me down and give me just enough attention to keep me following after him even after his feelings dry up because I'm useful. My chest ached with the exact pain I knew would follow the hope he built up in me. "I get that you're a womanizer but, I..." Even more than my anger at Sinbad, I was disappointed in myself for repeating my past mistakes. "I didn't expect you to- ask me to do that." Damnit. I sounded distraught. I was, but I wanted to hide it. I was going to lose what little respect he had for me. My eyes started to burn from the tears threatening to escape.

The King came to a halt during my rant and said nothing. Every time someone calls him out on something he can't honestly deny, he doesn't answer. That was actually something I liked about him. Even his lies have a bit of truth to them, and when he can't find a truth to twist he doesn't say anything at all. I felt his chest expand as he took a deep breath, and sighed. Even he knew I was right. This is who he is and how he treats people. He didn't actually see me as special.

His silence only strengthened my will to defend myself. "Not to mention: you promised you wouldn't say anything that sounded like genuine romantic interest in me!" I should have called him out when he first said he wanted to strengthen the rumors; it felt like a damn confession!

Sinbad's voice was quiet. "You're right. That was one of the rules..." There was no reason for him to sound so shocked.

Ignoring my boundaries was proof that he didn't actually respect me; I already knew that deep down. Hot tears pooled between my fingers on my cheeks. "I didn't place those rules to make the game more challenging, you know?" I did it to protect my heart from this exact pain I was feeling. I should have known it was a promise he'd only keep when it benefited him.

Sinbad's gentle voice only cut me deeper. "I figured as much. But Mori, I'm not playing that flirting game right now." The waves begged me to believe him. The fear of reliving patterns fought against the excitement and hope that this time could be different. "I can see why my past actions make it hard to believe me." Nonono. Don't say it! "I want to strengthen the rumors now because I only just realized that I-"

"ST-STOP!! Please." My voice was shaking with feelings too strong to properly show on my face. If I let him finish, I knew it would break me. It was my own fault I got hurt. I was just fooling myself, and giving myself excuses to be self-indulgent instead of protecting myself. No amount of rules in the flirting game would protect me from being swayed when I already liked him. I knew that. I thought that since this was a fanfic that things would work out for me at least a little bit. 'Damnit.' I took a slow breath. "I agreed to this because I can't walk and had a lapse in judgement. I don't like the rumors around us!" This was about more than just what Sinbad did. I had been triggered by memories of my ex-fiancé all day. I couldn't tell how much of my feelings were a trauma response. I needed to explain why I was so upset. "I was engaged once. Marrying him would have been the greatest mistake of my life. And it's a mistake I promised myself I would never make in the future."

"I... I had no idea."

"How would you know when I never told you?" My arms were burning from being in the same position so long. I dropped my hands from my face but didn't look at the person carrying me. Now that I had started, I couldn't stop pouring out the memories I had ran from all day. "He hadn't faced the reality of death until after we were engaged. His grandmother died, then my mom went on her deathbed. He demanded we go on break until my mom died, and barely a week after she did, he said that if I wanted to be with him, I'd have to accept him seeing multiple people. I was desperate for my life to not fall apart completely so I agreed, but it was a mistake. He basically stopped paying attention to me except to ask for help with his other relationships and things. On top of that, he didn't want anyone knowing he was engaged."

I could feel Sinbad tensing, and the waves moving around us.

Explaining this was helping me calm down. "It took 10 months for me to accept the truth -especially since I was in mourning. After I broke up with him, he admitted that he felt emasculate by my successes and hadn't wanted to be with me romantically for a long time -he just didn't want to lose access to me and knew I wouldn't want anything to do with him if we weren't in that type of relationship. He didn't even want to stay with his other partner for very long after I broke up with him."

I glanced at the man holding me. Sinbad was looking away, so I couldn't see his expression regardless of lighting. "You are a known womanizer even to people helping you with your dream. I like flirting with you, but I don't want to be led around by your lies. And I don't want to date ever again in general -let alone someone like you."

Sinbad's voice was void of emotion somehow. "I can see why." He didn't say anything else. I had studied his character enough to know that whatever thoughts he was having were intense.

My eyes started to water again from self pity and fear. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said any of this." I turned my head towards his shoulder in a poor attempt to hide.

Sinbad started walking again. "Why are you apologizing? I'm the one that got drunk and acted foolishly." Why did he sound so frustrated and genuine when we both knew he wasn't going to change? "I should be the one-"

"I read your Fate." I didn't mean to cut him off that time. "I've seen you tell these lies countless times. I know you're lying when you tell them to me." My voice was muffled by his clothes. I felt him tense again. It was a mistake to tell him this -especially that last part. I already told him yesterday I wasn't able to trust him. Why didn't the waves remind me? I felt the ability to talk leave me.

"No, Mori." I could hear genuine melancholy in Sinbad's voice. "I thought that because you read my Fate and flirted with me anyway that it couldn't possibly bother you. But I was wrong. You clearly set boundaries through the flirting game, and I ignored that you even felt the need to do that. I won't make the same mistake again. I am sorry."

. . . Did Sinbad actually apologize without an excuse? This isn't how the pattern goes! -Not for my exes and certainly not for Sinbad! I couldn't process this at all.

When he realized I couldn't accept his apology, he added. "It looks like I have a long way to go."

After a while he continued. "Mori, I'm not the King Sinbad from your visions. During our dinner last week, you told me that I will repeat the worst mistakes of my life. I don't want that; I decided to find a new path." I had said that but was that really enough? "I discussed it with Ja'far, but it looks like it will be a much longer path than I expected." Sinbad's hands squeezed my shoulder and knee.

I looked up at the man holding me to try to find some answer in his expression even though I couldn't see his face. This would definitely explain the changes in the waves at least. But there was no way he'd accept that in such a short time. "Wh-why do you believe me?" I was surprised my voice returned.

The King stopped walking again so he could look down at me, and even though I couldn't fully see it, his soft smile made me freeze. "Because you've proven multiple times that your visions are real, and you can even feel the waves like I can. How could I not trust you?" He paused, and looked pained somehow. "It's like you said. I used to think these waves were a sign that I was chosen by Fate. But I'm not the only one." He took another deep breath.

I couldn't help but stare up at him. Did he mean it? His expression looked nothing like his normal mask. And the way the waves were moving... But he was Sinbad: egotistical with a god complex...

He continued. "Thanks to watching how you interact with the waves on top of your explanations, I have a better understanding of more ways I can use them to my advantage." Ah. There it is. "I want you to be right: that I don't have to dirty my hands for the sake of my dream. When I can't find the right answer, the waves direct me to the people that do. And this time, I'll listen to them."

My voice was lost to me again. I was barely comprehending what Sinbad was saying. Did he really mean it? Did he really talk to Ja'far about this?? His reasoning was off, but he said he was going to ask others for help. My vision was blurry from tears. I couldn't accept this new hope growing in me either. Was I actually changing Fate? Ja'far always pushes Sinbad to dirty his hands any time he wavers; how could he reach this conclusion so confidently??

The arms holding me lifted me, and Sinbad leaned down, pressing himself against me. He whispered, "I'm going to find a new path. One where my Beautiful Prophet feels like they can trust me."

I couldn't handle his words nor the look in his eyes when I could see his face. He wanted me to trust him? 'Why did he say it like that?? Did he mean it?? Even a little bit??' It felt like it might actually be safe to believe what he was saying, just like those times when he called me 'amazing.' But that didn't mean I had to act on it or try anything now. I was too overwhelmed. I turned my head and pressed my face into his shoulder to hide the tears I couldn't stop. It hurt to force words past the block, but I needed to answer him somehow. I managed to say, "Me too."

I wasn't eloquent or nuanced, and I was barely audible, but I knew Sinbad heard me and understood what I meant in how he whispered, "Thank you," back. He lowered me back out of the hug, and after a few moments started walking again.

Relief was washing over me as much as the waves. Even if this was just more of his manipulation, in this moment I didn't care. More tears escaped, rolled past my glasses and soaked into the white fabric pressed against my cheek. If Sinbad noticed, he didn't say anything. I was too exhausted to talk anymore. His words repeated in my mind; I wanted to trust that he really meant them. Both him choosing a new path, and that thing he said before I snapped and cut him off -that he wasn't playing this time, etc. That should have been good for me. Most people want their feelings reciprocated, but not me. Not anymore. Getting that close to someone again is frightening. I'm not sure how long it will take me to be able to trust someone enough to try again. --- ~POV Generals~ Ja'far, Drakon and Sahel decided to wait for Sinbad to get back with Mori. Ja'far would have stayed regardless because of his position, while the other two stayed because they were worried about their King. Sin was either going to return with Mori happily and possibly officially a couple or Sin was going to come back defeated after offending Mori more. What none of them were expecting was for Sinbad to make it back to the platform with Mori limp in his arms.

Ja'far was the first to rush over. "Sin, what happened?? Why is Mori unconscious??"

The King shushed him. "Calm down. They're fine. They just got exhausted and fell asleep." He was using his normal tones, but his smile was slipping, and he wasn't making eye contact.

"Oh, I see." It was rare for Sin to be like this. Ja'far spoke slowly as he decided whether or not to push his King for more answers. "I'll have an area set up for them to rest until they wake up then." He turned to go summon a servant.

"That won't be necessary." Sinbad started walking towards the Palace steps.

"Wait. Sin, are you planning to carry them the whole way to the Palace??"

Their King didn't answer as he kept walking.

Sahel held her hands together. "Oh, it's worse than we thought."

Sin looked back at her with that stiff smile. "They're just sleeping. I promise."

Drakon clarified for his wife, "Not Mori. What happened for you to be making such an expression?"

Making eye contact with his old friend broke the cracked mask; Sinbad's expression fell. He didn't say anything, and after a moment looked down at the person in his arms.

--- ~POV Sinbad~ When they first met, Mori called Sinbad a scoundrel, and yet she still chose to follow him. Mori knew his deepest regrets and what he was capable of, and yet she still chose to follow him. No, it was because he was going to repeat those mistakes if she didn't convince him to stop. She said she liked him, but Sinbad was probably the type of person she hated the most. Ja'far had told him that Mori admitted to having a strong sense of responsibility -a 'noble's obligation' or something like that. That was why she chose him. He could see that now.

When Sinbad had finally reached the platform he knew that it would be for the best to put Mori down so they could rest easier. They could climb the steps on their own or get help when they woke up. That was the most appropriate course of action. However, as soon as Ja'far voiced the same idea, the King knew he didn't want to put Mori down. After her rejection, it felt like the line between them had only gotten bigger. Her weight in his arms was the only thing connecting them, and he wanted to hold onto that link for as long as possible.

Drakon asked a question Sinbad didn't know if he could answer. "What happened for you to be making such an expression?"

Was he supposed to tell them that he made made her cry? That his Generals were right every time they warned him that being a womanizer would come back to bite him someday? That he got disappointed when Mori first told him that he never fell in love or got married in her visions? That he repeated that fact to deny his disappointment? Was he supposed to tell them how much it hurt when Mori said she hated the idea of being with anyone? So much so that she cried at the idea of people thinking they were together? And to make matters worse, even after learning how she felt he continued to carry her because he still wanted to strengthen the rumors that she was his. What else was he supposed to do? She didn't accept his apology. There was no fixing this since Mori had read how he was a womanizer his entire life and only hours ago Sinbad showed her directly that was exactly who he is. Even so, that didn't mean he didn't have other methods. He was a King; he had plenty of options to keep her next to him even if she'd never accept his feelings. But then she would hate him. How was he supposed to accept that inevitable Fate???

The waves directed his attention to the worried expressions of his trusted people. 'That's right.' He just told Mori that he would start trying to rely on others when his back was against a wall; that was the best way to avoid repeating the same mistakes. And he didn't want his Beautiful Prophet to have any more reasons to call him a scoundrel. "I didn't stand a chance from the beginning." Damnit. "Mori was once engaged to a man that took advantage of her. And when she finally left him," admitting this hurt in a way he never experienced before, "she promised herself she would never be with anyone again." Let alone someone like him. "She told me when I tried to tell her I..." How could he say it now when Mori wouldn't let him tell her?

Mori stirred in his arms. There hadn't been many people on the walk back, and now there were a handful talking very close by. She would wake up soon. Maybe that was for the best.

Mori said that she couldn't read her own Fate so she had no idea how her existence would change things. He had been ignoring that part all this time because it was convenient for him. He didn't realize how much pride he had in not wanting to get married or fall in love. And Mori had rejected him multiple times, so he didn't want her to be wrong. The chuckle that slipped out of him was pained. To think it was Mori rejecting him so openly that would make him fully accept what he was feeling. There's no reason for a rejection to pierce his heart like this if he wasn't longing for the opposite. Even Sinbad knew that.

((So... uh... See you in a month when I finish the next chapter?

Not a lot of art in this one because I didn't want to draw the PTSD attack.

Gosh I need to practice drawing Drakon more. It shouldn't take me 3 hours to draw his face.

Also, I've officially reached the point were this fic will start directly conflicting my false truths and fears, so I'm not sure how quickly the next arcs will be written. I have the next chapter (the last of this arc) all written already, so I can get straight to drawing the art for it this weekend! I'll try not to leave you guys on this cliff for too long ;3 I hope to take less than a month this time))

[blackbird-brewster]

CM Smut Fic Recs

I promised to put together a master list of my CM femslash smut, so here it is. Although this only lists my own fics, there are more recs under the cut at the bottom of the post. Also, for longer fics I've noted what chapters have smut (if you want to skip to the good stuff). As always -- check tags before reading to make sure you know what you're diving into. Enjoy, my horny pals!

UPDATED: 16 August 2024

>> CM Kink Bingo 2024 Master List <<

JJ/Emily

* Denotes a long fic. I've noted reference points of what chapters include smut. PWP = Porn without plot

[Moment] || WC: 1,105 || PWP

Summary: Emily wakes up to a horny girlfriend, and only 20 minutes to do something about it.

[Pray] || WC: 2,898

Summary: JJ wasn't usually someone who sought out a one night stand, but all she wanted was to escape the weight of her life with the emotional release that only sex could bring. She didn't plan on leaving the bar until she found someone to leave with her.

[Gravity] || WC: 4,869 || *Smut: Chapter 2

Summary: They didn’t date. Technically, Emily wasn’t an ex-girlfriend, but she was an ex-something. An ex-maybe…an ex-almost.

[Ride] || WC: 821 || PWP Summary: JJ and Emily have a quickie in the car.

[Unsubs and Handcuffs] || WC: 4,100 || PWP Summary: JJ and Emily enjoy a bit of BDSM

[i can't be wrong (to be craving you)] || WC: 101,288 || *Smut: Chapters 1-4, 7, 10, 11, 12, 15

Summary: An Emily focused story chronicling her relationship with JJ and her mental health in the aftermath of everything she's survived.

Tara/Emily

* Denotes a long fic. I've noted reference points of what chapters include smut. PWP = Porn without plot

[Often] || WC: 3,083 || PWP

Summary: Tara tries to entice Emily to go home after a long day at work, but her plan works a little too well and Emily decides she can't wait.

[My Whole Life Long] || WC: 4,414

Summary: Tara and Emily celebrate their three year anniversary with a night neither of them will ever forget, in more ways than one.

[Missing You] || WC: 4,061

Summary: Tara and Emily's 'not-a-relationship' evolves into something more intimate over the months they've been talking...leading to Emily sharing some unexpected news.

[Motivation] || WC: 5,225 || PWP

Summary: The team is reeling after Mr. Scratch ambushed their SUV convoy, killing Agent Walker. Emily is struggling with her abduction and her guilt — but maybe a familiar face could help her unwind.

JJ/Tara

* Denotes a long fic. I've noted reference points of what chapters include smut. PWP = Porn without plot

[Sweetest Pie] || WC: 6,247 || PWP Summary: Tara makes a reckless decision in the field and her girlfriend (JJ) makes her face the consequences.

[Beautiful] || WC: 906 || PWP Summary: Tara on her knees, head between JJ's thighs, reminding JJ how beautiful she is. That's it, that's the fic.

[Between You & Me] || WC: 72,523 || *Smut: Chapter 1-2, 4, 6 Summary: JJ returned to the BAU after having her second child, seemingly having perfected the art of hiding how unhappy she is in her marriage from everyone on the team, well, everyone except Tara

Tara/Rebecca

* Denotes a long fic. I've noted reference points of what chapters include smut. PWP = Porn without plot

[Going Home] || WC: 3,254 || *Smut: Chapter 2 Summary: Tara and Rebecca share their first holiday together. Memories are made, love is abundant, happiness abounds.

OT3 Fics

* Denotes a long fic. I've noted reference points of what chapters include smut. PWP = Porn without plot

[Fooled Around (and Fell in Love) - Part 2] || WC: 87,395 || JJ/Emily/Tara || *Smut: 'Mature' rated scenes throughout, but Explicit threesome in Chapter 25

Summary: Part 2 of the [Fooled Around (and Fell in Love)] series. A wholesome, queer rom-com, with a healthy dose of polyamory.

[Fooled Around (and Fell in Love) - Part 3] || WC: (WIP) || JJ/Emily/Tara *Smut: Throughout - will update specifics when fully published Summary: Part 3 of the [Fooled Around (and Fell in Love)] series. A wholesome, queer rom-com, with a healthy dose of polyamory.

[Cut to the Feeling] || WC: 18,849 || JJ/Tara/Rebecca || *Smut: Chapter 2, Ch 4 (threesome)

Summary: When JJ finds out Tara has a girlfriend, she's surprised when this announcement causes her to feel an overwhelming sense of jealousy. In her attempt to ask Tara about her relationship status, JJ accidently admits far more than she ever intended, leaving Tara feeling confused and slightly intrigued at the idea of what she and JJ might have had together -- if not for the fact Tara is happily dating Rebecca.

ADDITIONAL CM FEMSLASH FIC RECS:

Past Friday Fic Recs:  [Friday Fic Recs - Tumblr] || [CM Fic Recs - AO3 Collection]

My Fanfic Master Lists: [JJ/Emily] || [Tara/Emily] || [JJ/Tara] || [Tara/Rebecca]

2023 Rec Lists: [JJ/Emily] || [Tara/Emily + Other Femslash]

2022 Rec Lists: [JJ/Emily] || [Tara/Emily] || [Other Femslash]

[commandershepardvasfuckit]

Hi! I was curious how it would be if Sylphy from Moshoku Tensei became a monster fucker (it's an isekai) Character background: She was pregnant when her husband went on a mission to find her mother with her magic teacher (a 70 year old loli💀), on the way she loses her father (she found him in another city) in a fight to the death against a monster, Sylphy's useless husband gets depressed and """cures""" himself by fucking her teacher (it should be noted that her teacher has known him since he was 2 years old). Then when they return home, her husband and her teacher force her to make the teacher their second wife.

I don't know? Maybe Sylphy will cheat on her husband or go with a monster much more powerful (and bigger) than her husband?👹

I don’t know the series, but it definitely sounds like she should have left her shitty cheating husband for a monster that would treat her better since it doesn’t sound like a case of healthy polyamory and instead just cheater and mistress.

Idk who this guy is, but top tier character design (I’m and absolute orc and troll fucker lol). She needs to find someone like them and get railed while being held up by a couple of sets of strong arms until she forgets about her ex tbh

[figs-and-cigs]

I may be going to an event tonight where my ex might be. I have that sickening turmoil in my stomach. It's been a couple weeks and I hate that I keep ruminating on how everything went down, wondering what I should have done differently. Rationally I'm proud of how I handled myself. I was honest, clear in my communication, I stuck to my boundaries, and kind. When her response was less than kind, I didn't keep myself in a position to allow that behavior to continue.

It's not exactly a need to be right. It's a desire to be understood. Like does she KNOW I put in a lot of effort to meet her requests? Does she know that I valued the relationship? Does she understand what I was communicating and why I see her response as a form of deflection, avoidance, and control? I guess I also have a lot of anxiety that she sees me negatively or presumes I see her negatively.

I'm not one to seek perfect closure when relationships end. It's not a need for me when I feel I've done my part and everything I can. If she wanted closure or to talk more, of course I'm open to it. But since she hasn't said anything I assume it's better to accept things as they are. But I still worry about seeing each other at an event and being questioned for why I haven't messaged her since last week. Or why I haven't done xyz. I feel anxious about being put in a position where I might have to explain myself (AGAIN) and it being misinterpreted (AGAIN).

But also worrying about things that haven't happened, that may not ever happened is a waste of time. Worry is like a rocking chair, something to do but you're not going to get anywhere. I try to address things as they come. I can't do anything about something I'm not aware of. If she needed more closure, she hasn't shared that with me. If I needed a conversation to try to find closure, I would have said something.

If I see her at the event tonight, I know I'll be as friendly and authentic as I always try to be. If she wants to talk about things, I might request we do it another time - not at an event with other friends around. I've been learning to trust myself to make healthy decisions and to be able to handle uncomfortable situations. Polyamory definitely presents me with lots of opportunities to grow.

[ateez-ao3feed-new]

Hate That It's a Fairytale

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/eWjMLEY by SunshineAndRayne Once, there was Hongjoong and Yunho. But sometimes love just isn't enough, and even the best relationships aren't always able to last. Six years later, Hongjoong finds himself back home, constantly running into the man he's never been able to forget. But now Yunho has Wooyoung, and Hongjoong isn't sure where that leaves him. A healthy relationship like theirs doesn't need an ex-boyfriend poking his nose into places he isn't meant to be... ...does it? Words: 24878, Chapters: 11/11, Language: English Fandoms: ATEEZ (Band) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: M/M Characters: Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ), Kim Hongjoong, Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ), Park Seonghwa, Song Mingi (ATEEZ), Choi Jongho (ATEEZ), Kang Yeosang, Choi San (ATEEZ) Relationships: Jeong Yunho/Kim Hongjoong, Jeong Yunho/Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ), Jeong Yunho/Jung Wooyoung/Kim Hongjoong Additional Tags: Past Relationship(s), Breakups, Reunions, Kim Hongjoong is Bad at Feelings, Minor Choi Jongho/Song Mingi (ATEEZ), Minor Choi San/Kang Yeosang, Fluff, Light Angst, Emotional Baggage, Jung Wooyoung is the best at feelings, Previous Choi San/Jung Wooyoung/Kang Yeosang, Polyamory Negotiations, Communication, Healthy Relationships, Betaed by me myself and I read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/eWjMLEY