#HE DID TRY TO KILL THE JOKER
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Fun fact: I have read every comic book appearance of Deadpool up until 2021. I don't just mean his comics and team up comics, but also every comic issue he has "guest starred" in. All of them.
#I worked part-time at an information desk for a little over a year and spent my free time pirating comics#When I got caught up on Deadpool I switched my focus to Batman and Red Hood#My favorite Deadpool storyline is The Good the Bad and the Ugly#And the following arc of Wade trying to figure out his new position as dad#My favorite Batman arc is actually post-DITF where Bruce is not handling the grieving process well at all#HE DID TRY TO KILL THE JOKER#and was like clinically depressed to the point of being passively suicidal#Ironic that Tim's original robin arc is technically my favorite#since I don't care about the rest of his time as Robin#Is this a pattern?#My favorite Deadpool arc is him struggling with the realization that he has a daughter#and my favorite Batman arc is him struggling with losing a son...#Would anyone believe me if I said I don't actually have daddy issues?
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Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man
#augh i dont want to cw this because im just talking about The Character and i feel bad when i do it for characters but i probably should#suicide mention#ask to tag#while im here i do absolutely believe hes been suicidal since jaybin times. maybe even before just in different ways. but like#going into that building with shelia? yeah#now. i DONT think he was aware of it and if youd ask him hed say no fully believing thats the truth#but like if a ghost jaybin had some introspection time i think he'd maybe eventually be like yeah#his outcomes to him were have a loving parent or die and hes a very big fan of ultimatums like that.#but he doesn't fully see it like that as jaybin because oh hes a hero and saving others when no one else can is what heros do :)#ramble. ivee been feeling it lately yknow how it is#ive once saw a post saying jason was planning to die after the joker was dead in utrh and yeagh i can see that#he puts A BOMB in his HELMET#suicidal characters in the context of hero stories are so fascinating to me. the self sacrifice.#the not caring about your own safety as long as you save someone else. the pushing yourself#the way itd be so easy to make it look like they just fell in battle. to be considered a hero in the end#anyway ive been glancing at suicidal jason todd fics. how bad is it that im still getting mad about characterization#because theyre not killing him right#AND ANOTHER THING. since im here and i try to avoid making posts about The Character like this so might as welk get it all out#think about suicidal jaybin as well as the fact 80s bruce very much considered suicidal people/people attempting like#weak and lazy? yells at them? i think thats about it. Very Much. je seems to straight up just hate them#again very much feel free to ask me to tag this one ^-^'#and i hope no one thinks im being callous here im very worried about that. i just its a very important part of his character to think about#and its fun to explore as someone who is passively suicidal myself#jason todd analysis#anyway no one look at me i am in my corner just rotating him#WAIT to clarify i dont think jaybin fully realized Just becauceof the heros sacrifice thing. i made it sound like that i believe#anyway. if you read him as suicidal since jaybin times and go to ditf with that lens like i did. well. the post death victim blaming..
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Randomized Robins AU - Ages + Worst Trait Exercise:
Steph (25):
Says her worst trait is her murderous rages (she is exaggerating for dramatic/comedic effect, she’s killed 3 people tops and for very good reason)
Thinks her worst trait is her spitefulness (one of the few traits she definitely got from her father + one that prevents her from fixing her relationships and living her best possible life. She’ll refuse to interact with someone she dearly loves after an argument (happens significantly less after Tim’s death) or will say things she knows are hurtful just for the sake of having the last word. This trait will worsen in some ways as the list of people who have wronged her and those she loves grows, but will also ease up as she matures and realizes the harm it’s doing to her relationships with those she loves most.)
Her worst trait really is her spitefulness
Cass (26)
Says her worst trait is her self-righteousness (she believes that her goals are righteous and, as a result, she is righteous. Cass becomes very defensive whenever someone questions the mission and often does not second-guess herself. This is a trait she only develops later in life as she grows closer to Bruce/learns to understand herself more/starts to love herself more. But she knows she isn’t perfect and when somebody she trusts criticizes something she is doing she is willing to listen. She just usually isn’t the one to START the introspection.)
Thinks her worst trait is her self-righteousness.
Her worst trait actually is her obsessiveness (she gets it from Bruce and, while not as bad as him, she will easily become preoccupied with her night-life and the mission if someone isn’t there to pull her back. She will do this to the point of self-destruction and it hurts her relationships with the people she loves, especially Steph.)
Tim (24)
Says his worst trait is his spitefulness (he actively rejects the idea of mending his relationships with the older members of the family and this causes him to also lack good relationships with the younger ones)
Thinks his worst trait is his obsessiveness (similar to Cass, if he gets fixated on a task or idea he will neglect everything else in his life in order to dedicate more time to it. Unlike Cass, he will almost never be dragged away from it unless Pierrot snatches control of the body and forces them to take care of themself.)
His worst trait actually is how manipulative he is (the KING of guilt-tripping and using people’s emotions against them. He’ll do whatever he needs to do to get what he wants, he’s not above crocodile tears. And he will do it to whoever he needs (or wants) to with little care for how his actions impact others.)
Pierrot (Insists: “Age doesn’t apply to me! And even if it did, I'd probably be the oldest. Or the youngest! I’d never be a middle child, though.” Mental assessments by the Bats have put him around 21, with a margin of error of 3 years. Pierrot has called this “blatant character assassination by my eternal rival!”)
Says his worst trait is that he is an irredeemable psychopath without any regard for the wellbeing of others (this is a lie and everyone who's important to him understands this).
Thinks his worst trait is his parasitic nature (he literally would not exist had Tim not suffered the way he did. Plus he is a living reminder of one of the worst things that happened to many of his loved ones. He is a parasite injected into a functional person's body and contributes to his continued suffering. This is also a largely incorrect judgement of himself, caused by his actual worst trait.)
His worst trait actually is his limited sense of self (he doesn’t really know who he is outside of ‘inheritor to the legacy of the Joker (a man he despises yet also views as a father)’ and ‘chip in Tim’s brain that became sentient’. He slowly develops an identity over the course of his life and relationships with other people, but he lacks the foundations of identity that most people have. Pierrot will often almost become a caricature of himself and what others perceive him to be because it's the only person he knows how to be. This causes wild swings in how he behaves and relates to others, sometimes to the detriment of himself and others.)
Dick (17)
Says his worst trait is his clinginess (he is a very extraverted person who likes to be around others, which mixed with his fear of abandonment after his parents died means that if he goes a few days without seeing/talking to a friend he will get very anxious.)
Thinks his worst trait is his anger issues (he gets ticked off very easily and will explode on people. He’s kind at his core and is usually very nice, but he has a temper that can escalate significantly. Spoiler (and later Twist) help him channel this anger into something positive.)
His worst trait actually is his anger issues.
Barbara (18)
Says her worst trait is her disability (internalized ableism, she thinks of herself as less valuable than the other Bats because she cannot be out there in the capes like they can. She will grow out of this as she matures and as she learns how invaluable her support for the team is.)
Thinks her worst trait is her disability
Her worst trait actually is her overly-independent nature (In an attempt to overcompensate for everything she can no longer do, she has resolved to do literally everything that she possibly can without any help from others. This results in many instances where she either takes on too much and winds up not being able to fully realize any of her tasks or where she makes her life and the lives of others significantly harder by refusing help when offered/not asking for it when she needs it.)
Damian (16)
Says his worst trait is his perfectionism (he is overly critical of both himself and others, taking any flaw or problem and amplifying it to an absurd degree. This is due in part to his life with the LoA (where even a brief misstep could lead to death), in part to how others treated him initially as Spoiler (any flaw was fixated on and used as a reason to either mistrust him or portray him as unworthy of the mantle), and in part due to the fact that he is Bruce’s son (the only person with worse perfectionism problems than Damian). Gradually, Damian has improved in this regard but it’s still a massive barrier to both his own happiness and his relationships with others.)
Thinks his worst trait is his perfectionism
His worst trait actually is his perfectionism
Duke (16)
Says his worst trait is his definitely-real secret evil side (says this as a ‘my dad is a villain so who knows??’ joke)
Thinks his worst trait is his impulsivity in his words (Sometimes he will crack a joke or say a remark without thinking it through, leading to a LOT of hurt feelings and drama. He’ll say something without thinking it through and wind up seeming insensitive. This isn’t done because of malice, rather because Duke is someone who’s quick to act and speak. But while the mantle of Insight and his awakening powers have helped him with his actions, they do not always help with his loose tongue. As such, Duke gains an unfair reputation in the media as an instigator and will accidentally cause family drama through what he says.)
His worst trait actually is his impulsivity in his words
Jason (14)
Says his worst trait is his bad manners (he grew up on the streets and has no idea how rich-people society works, which he’s pretty insecure about considering he’s now the youngest kid of Bruce freaking Wayne).
Thinks his worst trait is his reactiveness (Jason never got the privilege of planning ahead for various events in his life, so he instead needed to rely on being swift and harsh in how he could react to situations. It’s saved his life on multiple occasions and helps significantly in his role as Spoiler, but it can also lead to extreme overreactions (accidentally causing kidnapping scare after Jason ran away following a fight with Dick) and a struggle to plan things out ahead of time. As he grows more secure in his place in the family and in life, this trait will lessen but never fully dissipate.)
His worst trait actually is his reactiveness
#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#tim drake#dick grayson#barbara gordon#damian wayne#duke thomas#jason todd#batfamily#randomizedrobinsau#I'm debating whether I should tag this with the Joker Junior tag and those related to it for Pierrot#because like...it's not quite that. but it's also very close to that and is the direct result of that.#but Pierrot would fucking HATE to be tagged as that and sees it as an insult to his identity...which he already has problems with#so I don't think I'm gonna#anyways lmao I am totally projecting my younger self onto Barbara. How could I not? She's literally the reason I view my disability#the way that I do and she actively improved my mental health just by existing and saying some of the shit she did when I was in the#stages of accepting my own disability. So yeah I am projecting a lot onto her because I love her and see myself in her.#I'm mostly basing these characterizations on my favorite versions of them (ie Red Robin 2009 Tim and Birds of Prey Barbara).#so I'm taking the traits I like/think fit in this AU and discarding what I think either is bad or doesn't fit or if I just don't like it.#Damian's 'murder gremlin who is a meanie on purpose because he is a meanie' is entirely unappealing to me and also does not fit this AU#I prefer him when he's portrayed as a sympathetic kid (who is still an asshole) and not a demon child. So that's what I'm using.#same with Talia's 'abusive mother who is totally on-board with all of her father's bullshit and will kill someone for no reason' version#I have read enough comics to know what I like/what is most important and what I don't like/what is#BLATANT CHARACTER ASSASSINATION GRANT MORRISON YOU FUCK YOU SET TALIA BACK SO FUCKING FAR#I also decided to outline their WORST traits because I already know what I like about these characters/their best traits.#most people do. But what was a greater challenge was finding what would make their lives and those of others worse.#what would I hate about this person if I knew them IRL? What would I first suggest they get therapy for? What hurts them and why?#I found these questions really interesting in the context of this AU where some people are forced into completely different roles#the says/thinks/is was inspired by trying to answer that question for myself. I say my worst trait is my impulsiveness but when#I asked others in my life they answered 'oh so you said your weird thing where you don't ask for help right?'
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i cant figure the rest out but i think getting as far as i did with only a single python college course to my name is pretty good
#there are currently just two problems#1) he doesnt upgrade PER card killed. just per card-killing-event#like immolate kills 5 cards but he only upgrades 1 time. im not sure how to track how many cards are individually killed#2) he upgrades per card scored. i have absolutely no idea why that is happening. i dont know enough about this code 😭#the good news about 2 is that is is per card SCORED not per card PLAYED. i did test that#and he also doesnt upgrade if a joker is killed or if a consumable is used so that's good#wonder if it might be easier to change him to per joker killed... i just thought killing cards might be more fun#but either would make sense for what i wanted#i'll try that tomorrow if i feel like coming back to it#chat
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Tim comes back, creates an entire plan for Zuccos death, forgets that he made it, and then Dick finds it and runs off with it. Also do you think Damian would have tried to kill the Joker after what he did with Tim?
XD XD XD oh tim...yeah that's pretty in line.
I think he would have TRIED sure but bruce had to regrettably stop him and they're both so mad about it because Bruce ALSO wants this motherfucker dead. But after Jason lmfao if the joker just turns up dead- he turns up dead. Bruce isn't going to question it as much as he wants to.
#bruce very much did try to kill the joker i do like to remind people of this#he did try and superman said no because the joker was a diplomat and it would have caused an international incident like what the fuck#reverse robins au
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there's a lot of reasons why that titans show wanting to do batfam specific arcs, especially death in the family/under the red hood, flopped so hard each time, but one of the biggest is that they basically brought jason back after, like, a fucking month and it basically negates the entire thing
#personal#i mean the entirety of the stupid plotline makes me want to go mad#like i think they do actually have bruce kill the joker in retaliation which is like well then what's jason's problem then#that was the main sticking point for him#and then they have bruce like actively looking for replacement robins which like???? he didn't want another robin????#he was DONE with robins until tim full on blackmailed his way into the position like a little fucking menace#but like a huge part of the tragedy of the whole thing is the amount of time jason missed#jason dies as a shrimpy fifteen year old (like i think he's under five foot i think he's canonically 4'6??? baby!!!)#and then he comes back and he's older and more jacked and significantly more jaded#than he was in his 'i'm robin and being robin gives me magic' era#he lost a significant swath of his life and bruce never got to watch his son grow up it's fucking sad#and more importantly bruce had a lot of time to sit with this loss#to try and get to something of an acceptance and understanding that it happened and there's no way to change it#the *entire family* did they all had to take a lot of time to come to terms with that#and then suddenly jason's back??? and all that attempted healing gets thrown way out of whack because suddenly he's here again???#listen there's a way to do death in the family/under the red hood to make it a huge gut punch in a tv format#it's a bit difficult because it's such an iconic and well known arc that people can sometimes be blasé about it all#but there's a way that you can make it Work and work really well (as always i have thoughts)#titans uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh titans did not do that. at all. they beefed it.
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The batfam trauma candy salad would go absolutely insane.
Dick: Hi. I'm Dick Grayson and when I was 8 I watched my parents fall to their death in front of me, then I had to move away from everything I love and spend the rest of my life in some weird American city. And I brought the sour gummy worms.
Jason: This is so stupid- my mother used to kick me out when he drug dealer would come over so I didn't see her spending our very small amount of money on drugs.
Steph *off screen*: what did you bring?
Jason: nerds.
Cass: I was raised to be a weapon, a murderer. I brought peach rings.
Steph: I'm Steph and My dad was an alcoholic who thought he could go head to head with batman and outdo the riddler. And I brought Reese's pieces.
Tim: I'm Timothy Drake Wayne and I had left the house to try and find some guy before he killed my dad, just for him to kill my dad when I was gone. I brought sour rainbow strips.
Duke: My parents are in a mental ward, high on joker toxin. No one knows if they'll ever get better. And I got m&m's.
Damian: I am a highly trained assassin and-
Steph: cut. Cut. Damian. Civilian identities. Ok. Restart.
Damian: My mother randomly dropped me on some weird man's doorstep when I was ten. I brought rock candy.
#feel free to add more!!!#pleaseee add more#I might do a masked ver#itd be fun#tim drake#batfam#dc#red robin#batfamily#jason todd#dick grayson#robin#damian wayne#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#duke thomas#signal#orphan#spoiler#batgirl
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Tbh the only thing I have to say abt uth is that winick kind of nailed it with “doing it because he took me away from you” because that is exactly the language Bruce uses when he’s talking about his grief and death the people (usually women) in his life are “taken away from him”
#I don’t have sources to back this up and I could literally be wrong#look it up and tell me I’m wrong or just quietly live in the satisfaction bruce saying that is in MY memory and I’m busy#my train of thought wound up on maturity and how Bruce expects the maturity out of the children he himself didn’t have at their age#but it’s excusable if you buy into Bruce being there to guide them and Bruce doing it alone#like again I could be so wrong but Bruce’s aggression and having to be held back from killing#I really don’t think he would’ve killed in those situations but it is hard and someone holding you back is easier#emotionally#and now Bruce has more maturity and does the hard thing and Steph when she did the hard thing and let back mask go#that is what killed her#maybe. you know like she was injured but the gsw couldn’t have helped#but basically : if I wanted this to be taken seriously I would back it up and maybe see that this is all based on a false assumption#but I don’t think Jason was wrong for expecting it out of Bruce because Bruce was. like Jason was holding Bruce back. and now he’s gone#his partner. the thing holding him back is gone. so Bruce would do it#but like I said that in my mind is Bruce leaning on someone else to give him space to be angry and not temper it (difficult)#but Jason was not lied to but like. you can see how he got the impression#plus NO this doesn’t have anything to do with Superman that isn’t relevant. it’s not relevant I’m not talking about that#I’m talking about the helicopter. and the flashbacks to that scene from jokers POV#and how Bruce had given up. and did want the joker to die. but when he resurfaced he had scabbed over and the wound wasn’t so raw#and he was more mature and made the decisions he could live with.#so Jason was right. about Bruce. he was just also wrong.#I feel like this whole tag tirade is full of flaws I’m not trying to convince anyone of anything I’m just doing blorbo sideblog activities
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I have been thinking lately about a universe where Bruce Wayne killed the Joker.
I want to be clear here, since there are so many longstanding debates on this topic: I do not think Bruce Wayne should kill the Joker. I have just been wondering what would happen if the circumstances aligned in such a way that he did.
And to be clear on a related, yet slightly different topic: when I say I have been wondering about what if Bruce Wayne killed the Joker, I do not mean as the Batman. I mean Bruce "Brucie" Wayne.
Maybe it's kind of an accident? Like, he definitely did intend to hit the Joker, but he's Brucie right now, so he's trying not to look like he knows what he's doing while still doing enough damage to keep the Joker from killing someone, and meanwhile the Joker makes just the wrong move and -
And here we are. Brucie just killed the Joker.
Bruce's reaction here is one thing; he has his one rule for a reason, he's just broken it, he's determined to turn himself in -
His family's reaction is a whole different story. How does Cass feel about this?
How does Jason? Bruce has killed the Joker, just like he wanted, but it wasn't for him, not really, and -
And meanwhile, this happens in front of, say, a gala full of people, so now all of Gotham gets to react to it too.
Average Gothamite, seeing the words BRUCE WAYNE, JOKER, and KILLED in the same headline: OH, NO.
Average Gothamite, once they've processed the order those words are actually in: . . . I did not have that on this year's bingo card.
The city's most famous mass murderer has just been publicly killed by the city's biggest employer/philanthropist/source of tabloid harmless nonsense! Three days before Brucie was making tabloid headlines by tripping into a fountain and somehow losing his shirt in the process! Two weeks before, the newspaper was running a retrospective on the Wayne murders and what donation Brucie was making to help the families of victims this year! The article mentioned how one of his adopted sons had also tragically become a murder victim!
Now this has happened, and Bruce is having a breakdown over breaking his one rule, and the rest of Gotham just assumes that this is because poor Brucie thinks this somehow makes him like the man who killed his parents. They send a huge outpouring of support his way. This in no way helps Bruce's actual breakdown.
Ninety percent of Gotham is sure Brucie didn't actually mean to kill the Joker, and pretty much a hundred percent of them support him whether he meant to do it or not. No one wants to have anything to do with prosecuting this mess. Bruce is trying to make it as clear as possible that he will fully cooperate with the justice system and meanwhile an entire gala full of people is suddenly acting like they could in no way have possibly witnessed events that took place ten feet in front of their faces. Did Bruce kill the Joker? Is the officer sure? That doesn't seem like him. Maybe the Joker just tripped on his own. Marble floors, you know. Very slippery.
#batman#not silmarillion#bruce wayne#bruce wayne kills the joker#as brucie#this is angst for the batclan and crack for the rest of gotham
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I think people work WAY too hard to make akeshu toxic. 65% of their problems are related to circumstance/shido/yaldabaoth. the other 35 are fun to them
#☢️.txt#like..... guys........ akechi wouldnt try to kill joker under normal circumstances.#like yeah he did. and i dont think he regrets it/regrets it in any normal way#theyre a little fucked up dont get me wrong! but the kinda fucked up that just keeps things fun and flirty.#i also just dont think its toxic. i think this is somehow the healthiest option for both of them if akechi does survive#roz hcs
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What the fuck do you mean he woke up in his coffin alive, with like all of his injuries from his death, cracked open the wooden lid of his casket with nothing but a belt buckle and his hands, dug 6 feet out, while running out of oxygen, walked 12 and a half miles (and then maybe got hit by a car??!?)
And then during his Robin run, there was of course when he got beat up by the Joker and then got up to get the ropes off his mom
In legends he got beat up by an angry mob, was hospitalized, looks like he has a head injury as well as a broken arm and leg, and he just. Walks out and manages to find his way to the next gathering angry mob to try and stop em
He will not stay down and he will throw himself back into it as soon as he physically can, sooner sometimes
#also his “ive gotta do what i can to help-- even if it kills me!”#im. very normal about that#<-lying voice#is now a good time to mention i think of jaybin as vaguely suicidal and was very aware the warehouse could be a trap but went in anyway#because he had the chance to help and he doesn't value his own life that much. if i die i die kinda attitude. so long as he dies TRYING#which makes how they talk about his death even worse than it already is if you see it through that lens.#with the idea he didn't think he was going to survive#because no smidge of recklessness or an idea he could possibly fight the joker alone is there. just a child whos willing to die#also he gets beat up more than this theres more examples. but he just doesn't always very dramatically get up#im not. main tagging this. too embarrassed sorryy#dc liveblog#comic reference#crazy quilt. thats a notable fight too. he gots up rather quickly from that attack to get right back into it#apparently he took “at least 3 severe blows to the head”#he did get shot during the mad hatter fight but that one struggles to count here.#he was still back in the field sooner than he probably shoudve been#actually. how much does jason get hit in the head alone. here alone we have the mob. the quilt. and the joker as examples#literally no wonder he's wears a helmet after coming back#he shoukd keep the helmet#jason todd
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The Joker is Dead (and always has been)
Danny is attending Gotham U and gets caught up in a Joker escapade and realizes the clown is, in fact, a ghost.
Suddenly everything makes an insane amount of sense: the fact that no one has killed a psycho with seemingly human-normal abilities yet, that Arkham can’t keep him for more than a week, the obsessive behavior, the appearance.
Honestly, Danny should have clocked this before he even met the spook.
And Danny doesn’t want to step on any toes, really. The Bat and the Joker have A Thing going on. But, the Batman just isn’t equipped to really put a ghost away. No wonder there’s a breakout from Arkham every couple of months. How many other Gotham rogues are obsessive ghosts haunting the city?
Joker doesn’t display any of the usual ghost powers he associates with his own “rogues”—who’ve really become more like unwanted relatives over the years what with their dropping in uninvited, making a mess, and then ditching before they had to help clean.
It strikes Danny, as he’s being tied up by the clown-costumed goons, that maybe the Joker doesn’t know.
Huh.
How does he broach the topic in a sensitive way?
“Hey, uh. Not to be rude but�� You know you’re dead, right?”
Danny winces. Not like that, probably.
The Clown Prince of Crime stops in front of him, the crazed light in his eyes dimmed slightly by confusion. He glances back and forth between Danny and the students around him who are shying away from their insane classmate. (Which is. Fair.)
A menacing giggle warbles from the specter’s throat. He leans into Danny’s bubble, that eerie grin stretching somehow wider.
“Ohhhh really?” The clown draws it out and Danny can hear the crackle of static in the high notes. Honestly. How did no one figure this out before? “And are you gonna kill me, hmm? Have I got a widdle hero in my bait tank?”
“No, no, I mean, it’s not… you’re not… like? You’re not alive,” Danny rambles, trying to clarify and failing utterly. “You’re already dead.”
The Joker tilts his head, eyes dilating and glowing toxic green. He considers what Danny said, then throws his head back and cackles like a hyena.
The ghost doubles over, even, laughing so hard it sounds like he’s gonna bust something. He puts a white-gloved hand on Danny’s shoulder for support and squeezes, just shy of hurting.
After an uncomfortably long moment, the ghost wipes imaginary tears out of his eyes and pats Danny on the back so hard he stumbles and falls to his knee.
“You’re a riot, kid! If I didn’t have a date already planned…”
He trails off and ambles away, still chuckling and muttering to himself. “And they say I’m crazy! Wait til Bats hears about this!”
Danny watches him go, despondent.
It’s always harder when they don’t know.
This is gonna be a mess.
#dc x dp#fandom fusion: dpxdc#writing prompt#story ideas#new hyperfixation#basically Danny is like trying to exorcize Gotham to get an education#no idea where it goes from here
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I really like the idea of Alfred being the one to do it, for a few reasons.
It would be funny as fuck for Alfred to be getting groceries or something, and maybe get a new gun for his collection. Probably something made back in his heyday, if he’s feeling nostalgic. Suddenly Joker is there, goons have people hostage, and dear me, this isn’t good. Joker singles him out as the butler of the Waynes, makes some bad jokes, and then threatens his family. Alfred says something about Batman, Joker makes a smartass remark, and the ‘no killing’ rule that The Bat has is brought up. Alfred tells him that while Batman has a rule against killing, Alfred himself is very old-fashioned about things, and then shoots Joker in the face point-blank.
Alfred would be hailed as a hero by pretty much all of Gotham, and Bruce would never live it down. The amount of attempted kidnappings of the Waynes as a whole would also go down once people realized they were at risk of getting gunned down by the old man who ran out of fucks to give, and ended Joker.
I firmly believe that Alfred killing Joker would make Jason so happy. Alfred was always the grandpa you could come to when he had a fight with Bruce or even Dick. He looks back and sees that Alfred has always been the primary pillar of stability in their family. The crime lord stuff and bag of heads and hurting Tim was definitely been pushing the boundaries, but he was always the one to have the least problems with Jason doing his thing as Red Hood. Knowing that your grandpa who held you when you cried because you had a bad argument with your dad, and made meals from scratch in the early hours of the morning, and made hot chocolate on cold nights, and kept you in bed when you were sick or injured to make sure you healed no matter how much you struggled and kicked and screamed because he cared so much…to know that man is the one who Avenged you? I can only imagine how much that might mean to him.
I find the idea that Joker’s last moments being seeing this thin, old british butler who looks like a stiff wind could knock him over pointing a gun at him absolutely hysterical.
I feel like Dick would bitch and moan about how he beat Joker to death first, how come that doesn’t count toward the avenging death thing at all?!?!?
DC x DP Prompt
“So as the reasons stated, Anti ECTO Acts are not only harmful as a back door into the security of the Meta Protection Acts, it’s bordering on species destruction. I’m appalled this has passed right under our noses.”
Batman’s spirited (eh) speech from earlier kept digging at a nerve in Constantine’s mind.
“You seem pensive, are you alright?” Think of the devil, and he appears with his dorky pointing ears in tow.
“What? Yeah,” Constantine started, “I’m just surprised is all. What with your son being an ecto being, thought this sorta stuff would be on your radar.”
He shrugged as he went to leave, but was stopped by a winged gauntlet, “my son?”
“Yeah,” Constantine said, “the bloke with the red mask. I mean, it’s obvious, what with the fact he needs to kill and consume souls just to stay whole and sane.”
Batman’s mouth turned thin, “explain.”
Constantine snorted before sobering, “oh you’re serious.” He got the patented hng in response.
“You’re son’s a revenant, at least without a proper magical check up to make sure. That’s the typical prognosis when a person comes back from the dead after mur-”
“What,” Batman interrupted, “is a revenant?”
“An ecto being that needs to feed on souls to stay alive, or their demise avenged. Basically, their soul is unbalanced, due to the fact that when they came back, only their rage does. To get all the other emotions, they must,” he makes a slashing motion across his neck, “others to get those emotions from. Or, who ever killed them is offed by the person of their choosing. Well,” he thinks for a second, “it’s not a conscious choice but someone their soul chooses. Once the original perp is dead, the rage will rest, which lets in all the other emotions to stay.”
Batman huffed.
“Honestly surprised that the clown’s still alive. The amount of theatrics your son contains, I bet whoever his soul chose, got quite the show.”
#just thoughts#Bonus to the fifth point: Dick doing that did count- but only a little because it didn’t stick for long#it kinda took the edge off of the need to devour souls#would it be wrong of me to want Damian and Cass to have known about this?#even if they didn’t know about the fact that Bruce was an avatar of some aspect of Lady Gotham#the idea that they knew Jason is a revenant and were significantly more chill about the murder even after they stopped murdering people#is also funny to me#like they spent enough time around the gross death energy pools to immediately clock Jason as Having Something Very Death Related Going On#and pretty quickly went through the process of elimination to figure out what it was#Dick wants to shake them like paper dolls for not telling them that they needed to kill Joker for the sake of Jason’s actual health#If he’d known before then Joker would’ve been dead a long time ago!#Meanwhile Bruce is having a stroke in the background trying to find information about who The Lady is and how he even became an avatar#and who else might be an avatar or spirit-adjacent at this point#and he also gets as many wards and magic protections put on the cave and the manor as possible#because he did NOT miss the comment about the person who killed them all in a different timeline#DPxDC#jason todd#alfred pennyworth#bruce wayne#batman#john constantine
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(alt included)
Link to Video. (Please help Panda make money.)
Video description and transcript under the cut.
Description: TikTok video by The Panda Redd. Re-enactment of final scene of Under the Hood. All roles played by Panda (a tall, well-built young white man with a mohawk, wearing a grey hoodie). Setting is a dark basement lit only by a hanging light bulb.
Transcript.
Jason: (holding gun on Bruce) "Bruce, I forgive you for not saving me."
Batman: (glares silently)
Jason: "But why? Why on God's Earth—" (hits Joker across the face)
Joker (tied to a chair): *cackles*
Jason: "—is HE still alive??"
Joker: "AHAHAHAHAHHAHA!"
Batman:
Batman: "I'm sorry, d'you want me to be serious here or—?"
Jason: (in disbelief) "YES, Bruce! I want you to be serious right now! If he had done what he did to me to you, I would've done nothing but search the earth for this pile of death-worshiping garbage!"
Joker: "I love you too, Sugar Plum."
Batman: (holds hands up) "Okay, yeah, I get that, totally, I get that. Um. Have you tried?"
Jason: "Excuse you?"
Batman: "Have you tried to kill him yet?"
Jason: (to Joker) "Is he being serious?"
Joker: (also confused) "I'm gonna be honest with you, Junior. I don't know."
Jason: "Got it. Great." (turns back to Batman) "What the fuck does THAT mean?"
Batman: "Okay, so no, you haven't. Cool. Do it."
Jason:
Jason: (lowers gun) "What."
Batman: "Do it, cap his ass. Shoot him."
Joker: "I'm gonna go with Junior here, and say...what?"
Jason: "You want me to shoot him?"
Batman: "I want someone to shoot him! Give me the gun, I'll do it!"
Jason: (mutters, brain blue screening) "What is going on right now? This should a lot harder than it is."
Batman: "C'mon, son! You decapitated like eleven people three days ago! Fuckin' do it!"
Jason: "There, you happy? Jesus. Was that so hard? All of this time and it was THAT easy!"
Joker: (turns to Jason quizzically) "This has gotta be some sort of test, ri—"
(BANG! Jason fires. Joker lands on the floor lifeless, eyes still open.)
Batman: "I don't know what you're talking about "easy". There's nothing there." (nods at floor)
Jason: "What the fuck is that supposed to—" (looks down at floor where the Joker was lying)
Floor: (is devoid of Joker)
Jason: (stares)
Floor: (continues to be sans anything but carpet)
Jason: "What the fuck?"
Batman: "Yeah."
Jason: "WHAT THE FUCK?"
Batman: "Take as long as you need with this."
Jason: (looking around frantically) "I just shot him! He hit the floor! What the f—"
Floor: (is just vibin')
Jason: "Where the fuck did he go??"
Batman: "See that shit? That shit right there happens every fucking time!"
Jason: "There's not even a blood stain! It's just gone!"
Batman: "Yeah, like two days after you died, I chased him into a helicopter where he got shot like six times. The helicopter exploded and crashed into the ocean. And his body was gone before Superman could find it."
Jason: "Oh my God. I don't understand how this is even fucking possible!"
Batman: "He's like a cryptid! I don't fucking get it!"
Joker: (disembodied laughter) "AHAHAHAHA HAHAHA!"
Jason: (freaked out, turning in circles trying to find him) "Oh my God!"
Batman: "THAT OMINOUS SHIT HAPPENS TOO! I DON'T KNOW, DUDE!"
Jason: "Dude. Fuck whatever's going on here, that's some fucking bullshit."
Batman: "Thank you! Finally someone gets it!"
#thepandaredd#red hood#the panda redd#jason todd#bruce wayne#under the hood#under the red hood#plot armor#joker#batman#batfamily#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorrect batfam quotes#incorrect batman quotes#dc comics#dcu#comics purgatory#bat meta#crack meta#spite waffle
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Danny Kills the Joker AU
Danny is on the run in gotham, as you do in dpxdc fics. His parents are dead and he is trying to stay out of Vlad's custody. Gotham has plenty of ectoplasm to hide his ecto signature. It also has a high enough population of homeless people that no one would even notice Danny just showing up.
He's been living rough in gotham, mostly sticking to Crime Alley and The Narrows, sleeping in abandoned buildings or in relatively clean parts of the sewer system. He eats what he can find and does his best never to be seen.
Not good enough since he along with like 30 other street kids get picked up by joker goons and tied up. Joker is planning an explosive party for the city to watch and he needed guests. Joker literally set up bombs of joker gas around the city that will go off and send the entire city into pandemonium, killing millions. The only way to stop the bombs is to kill his guests (homeless kids from Crime Alley) which the city can vote on. Kill themselves or kill kids.
Danny is sitting at the edge of the group, listening as Joker televises his new plan to the entire city.
He really, really hates clowns.
He is also not gonna let this guy kill all of these kids. He may not be a hero anymore but those protection instincts didnt die with his parents.
And also fuck that clown.
He phases through his bonds, and then starts asking the various kids to borrow their hat, gloves, and scarf. Gotham street kids take one look at this out of town kid and mentally wish him luck while planning out his funeral. They keep on acting terrified because as stupid as this kid is being, they're not snitches either.
Danny puts on the borrowed clothes to hide his face and hair. He can't be identified, or Vlad is gonna be on his ass tomorrow. Once fully covered he gets up and into view of the camera. The Joker notices him, turns around to laugh and jeer at him. Probably shoot him for being impolite and interrupting him. Danny doesnt even pause just walks right up to the clown and coldcocks him.
Based on the sound of bones snapping Danny admits he might have punched a little too hard. Danny checks the Jokers pulse and immediately panics. Danny has Batman levels of fear around killing and he is panicking about becoming Dan.
"Holy Shit I killed him!" He says, to the entire city because the camera is still rolling.
Cue:
Danny running for his life, trying to hide away from his fear and guilt.
Red Hood becoming like his dad and drawing up mental adoption papers
Harley Quinn also drawing up adoption papers, paper ones, while Poison Ivy changes their home's 'no boys allowed' banner to 'son boy allowed'
Jokers goons trying to find Danny to kill him for killing their boss
City wide pandemonium as the jokers death is confirmed and people are partying in the streets, the mayor is planning on giving the street kid who did it the key to the fucking city
The batfam trying to find Danny to protect him from Jokers Goons (Bruce is third in line for custody not that he knows he is gonna have to fight both Harley and Jason for the honor)
The crime alley kids are still not snitching on the kid who saved them. Anyone who asks them about Danny only respond with 'what are you a cop? Fuck off pig'
Vlad Masters, as someone who has been punched by Danny, immediately recognizes the punch and flies to Gotham to find his wayward 'son'.
Vlad even meets with Brucie Wayne to ask for help in finding Danny. Bruce gets bad vibes from Vlad and is even more invested in finding Danny. The boy has dark hair, blue eyes, and a tragic orphan backstory. Its fate!
Danny meanwhile is hiding in some sewer somewhere breathing into a paper bag as he panics about becoming a world ending threat.
#danny phantom#dpxdc#dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#danny kills the joker#danny and bruce are in a competition over their guilt complexes#impossible to tell who will win#jason is like 20 and ready to be a father#batman#jason todd#harley quinn#dc joker
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suddenly struck with thoughts about the devastating concept of Jason Todd
because he was good. because he had a bleeding heart despite every reason not to. he loved school and was good at it. he was the first to be adopted, with little pretense of guardianship. he did everything he could to be a perfect Robin and live up to an impossible ideal. he only ever wanted Bruce and Dick to like him.
because he met Bruce in the same place and on the same day that Bruce's parents died--the single defining moment of Batman's existence. and he made Batman laugh. he hit the Dark Knight, Terror of Gotham, with a tire iron. he wasn't afraid of the man who turned fear into a weapon.
because he couldn't save his mother from herself, but he tried. because he was too good not to try and save the woman who gave him up. too good to play the Joker's game. the crowbar didn't kill him, the bomb did. he died knowing he wouldn't make it and tried anyway. he died a hero.
because other Robins have died, but none of them put an irrevocable tear in the mythos of Batman. because Jason Todd always dies, in every universe. he dies for the sins of his father. he was put to death by popular vote, sacrificed by the crowd. doomed by the narrative and doomed by the audience. the boy who only ever tried to prove he was good enough--wasn't good enough.
because he has every reason to be angry. because he didn't ask to be murdered, didn't ask to be brought back, and when he did everyone acted like he was better off dead. Bruce tried to kill him and nearly succeeded. he's blamed for his own death and blamed for his resurrection. he can never come home because the house is haunted by his own ghost.
because he's been the hero, the victim, and the villain. because his family and his writers and his universe don't know what to make of him. they don't know how to look his tragedy in the eye. and how can you?
it hurts to look at the hero who cannot be good enough, the victim who will only ever be angry, the villain who can sometimes be right. the audience hates to feel complicit and, in this exceptional case, they are.
#don't look at me#the writing potential of jason is so often wasted#death in the family still haunts me tho#jason todd#dc#red hood#he could be an exploration of tragedy#on the level of rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead#but nooooo#robin#batman#dc comics
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