#GO TF TO SLEEP @ ME
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suuuuper curious to know where you're suspecting the story will take striker, blitz will definitely want him decimated once he comprehends the damage dealt to stolas, but there's also the matter of there definitely-almost-certainly-i-am-not-deluded being a goetia we still haven't met who striker wants decimated for whatever the fuck was done to him and his in the past ( unless he's already killed them and then just.... kept on plowing with his unquenchable quest for vengeance ) + obvs his backstory needs to be revealed and that thing will have to address both his classism and his identity as a hybrid + there's def more villains left he could team up with + twice now there's been the lingering threats towards octavia and oh no where could that possibly go now that he's off stella's chain + i am so curious where his beef with eminem will go now that they've had a rematch
hello hello!
THIS IS AAAAAAAAALL PULLED OUTTA MORE OR LESS NOTHIN' BE PREPARED:
Yes, absolutely there is some Backstory that's been somewhat hinted at that I think will explain some of his ire and further develop him as a foil to blitzø, who, after all, early in s1 could for a second there have believably joined him due to feeling objectified and used by stolas after a lifetime of his talents (which in the episode and generally all episodes are shown to be substantial) going to waste, due to, yes, his own Trauma, but also due to Class specifically. but of course, what striker doesn't get is that blitzø actually likes loves stolas and also stolas loves blitzø and wants to do better by him RIP
(sidenote, I think if striker found out that the reason blitzø acts Like That around stolas is to keep himself emotionally safe/at a distance, because he doesn't feel good enough for stolas, he'd flip a table, not because he cares about blitzø's mental health, but because This Is What He's Been Trying To Make Points About The Whole Time Dammit These Blue Bloods Take Our Best And Turn Them Into Whining Toys Desperate For Their Approval!!!!)
but yes, something that will potentially make blitzø see/understand where striker is coming from, and why he's unhappy with the way things are (in ways moreso than everyone else is unhappy about the way things are), and even maybe why striker was hoping to find some commonality with him? because they... do have a lot of common ground....?
sidenote here, I don't think this can be entirely divorced from stolas' and fizzarolli's arcs, the former I think could potentially eventually abandon the expectations forced upon him and become blitzø's employee/partner, and the latter... more unsure. still need some data, but it'll definitely pertain to his relationship with asmodeus being out in the open now. my dream is poly life, but hey, i'm never expecting it, even in queer shows. not everything can be sense8 after all --
but stolas and fizz represent two sides of the status quo that are going to dismantle it in their own way. stolas by not subjecting himself and therefore others to what he's been taught he Has to do and be, and fizz through his relationship with ozzie. they're already so much more effective than anything striker has managed to achieve, despite his beliefs
but also that striker is blitzø's shadow. blitzø feels hopeless and alone, but he's got a lot of people (especially as of halfway through s2) who would go out to bat for him, who want him in their lives, who really really care... the person blitzø doesn't want to be is... striker. striker is a match for blitzø in every way (share first place at the harvest moon festival), has many similar opinions (oh great, now the supremacist is agreeing with me), and is similarly jaded... and has nobody at all
the point is that striker's goal is to dismantle the status quo... sort of... it's to destroy something in any case, to get vengeance as some kind of vague Concept (which does make me think he got his vengeance and is just post-vengeance lashing out) but it doesn't seem like he's thought that far ahead, and now it's become personal, it's all centred around blitzø (and fizz, but blitzø moreso) "betraying" their kind, and stolas and potentially fizz, now after oops are symbolic of everything that's Wrong, but also... it would hurt blitzø specifically..... both western energy and oops showed blitzø reacting emotionally to someone getting hurt because of striker. differently, because his relationship with stolas and his relationship with fizz are two distinct kinds of fucked up, but in the end, because of blitzø's place in the story and the Thing that striker is trying to destroy (powerful demons and the class traitors that allow themselves to become their pets) it aaaall centers back around to him and striker becoming more and more unhinged about, specifically, him, and also maybe wanting to drag blitzø to his level and finally finally agree with his point of view...
at least... that's what i want it to
so I want it to get more personal from here on out. striker seemed to really lose it at the end of oops, there is no cool left AND THEN BLITZØ BLEW HIM UP. MY GUY! IT'S PERSONAL NOW IF IT WASN'T BEFORE! (and it was getting personal before, but I'm gonna break you like a horse really cinched it -- and that was before his manic attempts at murdering fizz in front of blitzø)
I don't necessarily think blitzø would want to "decimate" him, not because striker isn't really dangerous and hasn't actively tried to kill two people blitzø loves (and moxxie and millie by proximity), but because to blitzø this isn't as personal... yet. kill, maybe, but I don't think he's currently out looking for a fight, and I think once it does get that personal, the dynamic will be too complicated to measure in simple terms of destruction, i think it'll be a cauldron of things...
I need to go back and rewatch western energy to remind myself of how exactly he taunts stolas that blitzø isn't coming for him, just to convince myself that there's something in there that's more than just glee about stolas being hurt, but also that he's happy that blitzø hasn't been completely lost to this relationship (fizz is way more of a lost cause according to striker), and maybe he can cut that thread for him, who knows. put him back on the right path. it's a gift, really, killing stolas
and i want blitzø to pity striker. i think that would drive him right over whatever edge he hasn't toppled off already, if blitzø understood and saw him and still told him that he was wrong, but now he felt sorry for him
as for via, great potential for a stolas and blitzø co-dads team-up? i don't imagine she'd get seriously hurt in the way other characters have been, but then that's my own limitations, simply because she's been safe from harm so far... but yeah, co-dads team-up. feels like a later down the line thing (well, most of this does)
i do want striker to land some kind of truly painful hit on blitzø. something he can't walk away from without actually getting help. whether that's hurting people he loves, or hurting him in a way so that he needs to be saved (listen, i want the latter... big fan of emotional whump blitzø, but the show has us covered on that front, it's time for him to need saving after getting stabbed and beaten and what have you, stolas can't have all the fun!)
In Conclusion: do I have real Theories? not as such. I just have Feelings.
a. I want blitzø to understand striker because of striker's past, and for that understanding to make things worse between them b. I want striker to take whatever messed up emotions he has and fine-tune them in blitzø's direction and everything he cares about (hell, maybe barbie could get involved in this somehow, so far she's been very far off to the left) c. I want striker to really really hurt blitzø. I want blitzø to at one point be genuinely, deeply afraid and in pain for a prolonged amount of time (so not just the brief parts in oops, I'm talking full episode angst) because of striker -- I think especially because striker has lost a few bouts against I.M.P. it's time for him to get a real win. and for blitzø to get hurt. sorry, that's what you get for being the narrative's specialist little boy d. I want striker to accidentally bring stolas and blitzø closer together, perhaps by kidnapping/threatening via e. I want striker to function as blitzø's narrative/symbolic shadow for the rest of the show f. do I want striker to survive the show? idk. maybe. I like a villain whose motives you get, but who never gets redeemed, and whether that can happen and him surviving, who knows g. I want there to be more horse-based innuendos, I think that's their shared language h. (I also want him to start crying because he's so damned tired of everyone making his esteemed rivalries and attempts at decent threatening behaviours and murder into a sex thing. can't a guy be a mass-murdering hitman in peace these days?)
as for villains: striker and mammon? striker and paimon? the hypocrisy of striker working with people like stella being writ even larger, simply because his whole set of ideals have been upended by how much he wants to destroy/dominate/win over one fucking guy that lives in his head rent free (blitzø has that gift)
In Real Conclusion: in the journey to try and get at blitzø, striker destroys the last parts of himself that he could hold onto. something like that. that would be cool. also. want him to make blitzø cry at one point. just cos.
#helluva boss#helluva striker#blitzø#blitzo#blitz#helluva boss meta#blitzker#striker/blitz#because listen. do i Ship them in the traditional sense? no#do i think there is a non-zero amount of this dynamic that i like best when it's hard to sum up outside of some of the precepts of shipping#yeah that... that thing.... i like the idea of a striker who wants so Desperately to dominate/break/control/win over/etc blitzø#and a blitzø for whom the greatest fear is becoming striker#hb meta#go tf to sleep me
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Marvel making familiars for his loved ones
So I was thinking about Tawky Tawny (again). The thing about him is that he got so many different backstories or explanations on what he might be, but a common enough theme that we see is that he is a stuffed toy when he wants to be.
So here me out.
Tawky Tawny is Billy’s familiar and helps him adjust to his magic when he wants to use it in his small form. He was originally a toy given to Billy by his parents and later given life by The Wizard.
It came with more benefits. Tawny would eat his nightmares, be able to teleport to Billy’s location so that he could never get stolen or lost, protect Billy by going into his tiger form and all around be a constant warmth on his life.
So imagine Billy doing the same as The Wizard.
A lot of his friends aren’t magic users and don’t have the same magical protection he does, so maybe he gives them some enchanted clothing or pendants. A semi familiar (because without magic you can’t make a magical familiar pact with a living animal) where he just makes them familiars.
He would create stuffed animals, and weave in some magic to make them sentient. Maybe it would start with younger heroes, but when he realises his coworkers in the JL need the help as well, he absolutely would make some for them. They, like Tawny prefer to stay in stuffed toy mode, but will sometimes would want to stretch their paws and go into animal form once they feel like they are in a suitable environment.
Just picture it.
It all started with Raven, and the constant stress she might feel with having to constantly guard over Trigon. She can’t have a familiar because most creatures would suffer if give a link to her because her magic is not compatible like that. Captain Marvel decided to make her a companion. He makes her a little leopard wearing an elegant pink suit with a little top hat.
Raven: Is that a plush?
Cap: I heard you have trouble sleeping, so I got you a friend. I haven’t given them a name or pronouns, so that’s up to you.
Raven: … why
Cap: Trust me, they are for nightmares! Tawny *holds up his tiger plush* tells me they are fun to hunt and makes quite the sweet treat.
Raven: *holding the handmade gift* thank you 🥺
Cue shenanigans where she thinks he’s just trying to be a great den mother, and is a tad naive thinking stuffed animals actually work. Not that she isn’t holding little Ebony Darkness every night and is getting the best sleep she has in years.
Another thing to add is that insomnia and PTSD is a common sight within the caped community. And of course Billy notices that. So, after seeing more and more positive results of his plushies, he makes more and more. It becomes a trend. Younger heroes receive a small teddy of an animal and proceed to get attached to it almost immediately.
Nightwing almost cried when he got an elephant wearing a bow tie . Cap said that he seemed like the type to like them. Now Dick has given Zitka a little sibling to sleep at night with. But then that plush becomes fond of Zitka and gave the og elephant plush sentience.
Starfire absolutely adores her shrimp plush. Said something about being able to see colours together. Wally doesn’t know what to think about getting a turtle, but quickly gets attached, even putting little designs in the shell.
Jason also likes to put in patterns in his sting-ray, which Roy doesn’t get cause he thinks his jelly fish is perfect just the way she is. Lian gets a smaller jellyfish, which makes her happy because all the Outlaws get a sea animal.
All the members of YJ, even the retired ones, get a reindeer. They suspect he knows.
It gets back to the JL that Caps giving stuffed toys to their protoges.
Flash: Hey, Cap, how come we don’t get any stuffed animals?
Captain, exited his work is wanted: You want one!!!
Flash, can’t say no to that face: … yes I do
He gets all exited and makes plushies for all of his coworkers, that he pours a bit of extra magic in his work.
CM, fidgeting infringe if the door:
Batman: what is it Captain
CM: I made you something but then I realised that you wouldn’t really want it but then it could be cool if you did and I didn’t want to overthink-
Batman, stopping Billy’s rant: go ahead
CM, hands him a plush snake wearing spectacles: I thought you would like them. I haven’t named them so that’s up to you
Batman, not knowing where to go from here: … is the name important
CM, offended: It’s the MOST important
Batman sighs and keeps the snake. Naturally he does a billion different tests but finds it’s a snake plush. One that’s handmade. That must have taken a lot of time and effort. Batman keeps George Snaking. No he will not admit that having the snake wrapped around his shoulders is soothing.
And it just spirals from there. Hal gets a Sparrow in a poncho, Plastic man gets a kangaroo wearing the nicest boots, Wonder Woman gets a duck in a fancy dress, Aquaman gets a penguin in swim shorts, J’onn gets a lion in a toga … Guy gets a clown fish.
It has no rhyme or reason. The only common thread is that it’s an animal with some sort of clothing. Cap just says that of course they have clothing, they are distinguished and perfectly civilised individuals.
It all come to a head when the League faces some threat, and they are weakened, only for their plushies to fucking teleport and turn into massive version of their respective animals and saves the day.
Hawkwoman, starring at her bear: I- Mrs Snuggles?
Mrs Snuggles: *shrugs*
Shayera: … I could have been getting bear hugs this whole time
Guy: *looks down* Flippers?
Flippers: *flops on the floor*
Guy: ….
Guy: how come the others get bigger version of their animals
The League of Superpets aren’t that worried about competition. They tried to recruit the plush’s, but turns out they are just lazy. Like, they will beat a butch if necessary, but won’t actively go looking for crime to solve. They act more of a home défense.
The only ones who knew about the sentient plushies where Ma and Pa Kent (their Octopus is extent helpful around the farm), Alfred Pennyworth (he’s the one who actually requested hamsters to help keep the manor clean and keep an eye on his family) and Damian who’s instinct immediacy told him his fennec fox is alive.
Oracle got a capybara. The Capybara is the most powerful one Billy has made, second to Tawny. I don’t make the rules.
Constantine is the only one who never got one. Billy is still salty about him trying to steal his powers. Plus he would prolly sell it.
#billy batson#shazam#dc captain marvel#dc#tawky tawny#just Billy making his friends plushies#Constantine is wondering why tf he’s just handing out weapons of mass destruction#it’s why he won’t be getting any :(#dad marvel au#of you squint you can see it#Raven deserves to have a mentor in her life#there’s so many characters im not going to tag them all#it’s midnight rn and I promised myself I would be healthy in my sleep patterns#i lied#sorry me from this morning the day did not go as planned
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slam dunks these out of my sight
#one on the left especially feels like a lost but we'll see#going tf to sleep 🚶♀️#only thing that's going to save me is outfit lineup. only thing i know to do at this point peace and love#lydiaalin#operator rua#warframe spoilers#just in case
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idk what girl out there needs to hear this rn but your big/pointy/crooked/etc nose is SO cute and also i’m SO gay for you like insanely gay for you
#wlw#wlw mood#sapphic#sapphism#lesbian#met so many women with the most attractive pointy noses i have ever seen#and EVERY time theyve told me they hated their nose#like!!!#girl im going to kill society for you who tf taught you that i’ll bite them#the world making so women insecure about their best features is the beginning of my villain arc fr#had ANOTHER girl tell me she hated her nose today and i am frankly quite done with the nose slander#i love all of your noses i want to place little kisses on them and boop them with my finger#if you talk shit about ur beautiful nose anymore we WILL have beef😤#im gay and i like sleeping
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Prompt:
Calvin Rose finds a catatonic teenager roaming the streets and… well, the poor kid looks dead on his feet, and it’s raining cats and dogs, he can’t just leave him there.
And, it’s fine. He’s just passing through (can’t risk more with the Court still at large) and will be back on the road come morning. And he’ll sleep easier knowing he kept the kid from certain death.
So, really, how the hell did he end up with the very same kid riding shotgun and nagging him to turn up the radio to Phoebe Bridgers?
#Calvin rose accidentally adopts Jason#stranger to caretaker#talon#court of owls#Calvin is perfect big brother material you can’t change my mind#some roadtrip#some angst#some ‘who tf are you’#coupled with ‘wouldn’t you like to know’#Calvin goes from caring for a catatonic teen to being so good at said care that Jason actually starts healing#the natural way not the green bathwater way#Calvin ‘I liked you better when you talked gibberish’ Rose#Jason ‘a crowbar and a coffin and you’ll have me back to original’ Todd#Calvin ‘… this kid is giving me depression’ Rose#Calvin Rose going out to buy milk and coming back with no milk but Joker’s death all over the news#‘obviously I was just buying milk’#‘yeah? where’s the milk#‘… the store was out of milk’#Jason is SALTY at the batfam#he far prefers the weird murder guy right now thanks#Calvin just likes to get a taste of real family#Calvin ‘look I would sell Jason for a hot cup of coffee but if you look at him sideway prepare to be killed in your sleep’#Calvin rose#jason todd#batfamily#Bruce annihilates the Court so Calvin and Jason make another pit stop#unfortunately the batfam catch sight of Jason in the street#Jason PANICS tm and runs to hide with his totally-not-overprotective ex talon friend#prompts#dick grayson
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mystery solved
I spent ALL DAY getting mad abt pharmas dumbass guns when it was so simple all along..
I’m still mad abt it tho bc?? the arms connected to his guns would have to be so long for them to be moving around like they are in the two(?) whole panels they are in. It makes no sense
#my art#sorta???#my illegible ramblings#I’d like to know tho why/when he got these guns because it didn’t seem like ratchet knew about them so I’d think they’re either new-ish#Or something that just never came up ig??#maybe I’ll discover more as I continue to reread but I don’t remember anything else abt his guns#why am I so interested in pharmas guns? that remains to be seen#I’d love to see more things with his guns tho. cool character details make me happy#anyways actual drawings coming soon im practicing drawing this freak#pharma#tf pharma#transformers pharma#maccadam#transformers#ok time to go to sleep
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It's you! Despite everything, it's still you.
📸 (right photo) @/Eternal_Token on twt! Thank you to them for taking the photo and giving the sign to The Lads <3
#these two go hand in hand#and never fail to devastate me#because nothing has changed and I'm so happy they get signs like this??#like it's this extra thing of 'let it be known that despite all your hardships and your self hate there is a world of people who adore you'#the amount of times I've cried over this bad is unreal tf#sleep token#st#vessel#vessel sleep token
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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Obsessed with this Cate Blanchett Vogue China shoot by Szilvester Makó
#too many things happening today it’s all too much for me#I love when she does fun creative shoots like this#cate blanchett#also. I’m in love with her#the smile in the last photo 🥺😭#I need to go tf to sleep
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would human tfone just be a bunch of minority kids being told they can't get their liscence
#like#i'm procrastinating going to sleep ignore this#this thought hits hard considering they're basically slaves#am I allowed to say that#like minorities are always those irl like huhhhh yes yes white old man oppress me and my not pale skin#man I'm self projecting i'm learning this year and we'll find out if the asian bad driver stereotype is true (it is)#minorities shouldn't be allowed to drive!! (that way I won't be allowed to drive)#/J /J /J THAT'S A JOKE#I'm going to wake up tomorrow and looks at these tags thinking what the fuck#transformers#transformers one#Orion Pax#Elita 1#elita one#B 127#D 16#Megatron#tf one megatron#tf one optimus#Optimus prime#tf one elita#tf one bumblebee#tf one b 127#maccadam#maccadams
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why do i feel like erik would get a little jealous at how attached charles is to the cat and how much attention it’s getting from him
erik 'michael' 'magnus' 'max' lehnsherr is above getting jealous over a cat ok he knows charles loves him more than a silly lil furless furball
Magneto however.
#snap chats#ik max his birth name but the alliteration was right there ....... sue me officer i love me some alliteration .....#evil helmet talking to him like the green goblin mask tho like 'crash a yacht so charles has to pay attention to you'#i think erik donning the magneto persona just to get charles' attention is the funniest shit i can conceive of at 1AM on a school night#like bro he is not replacing you with a cat ... i prommy .... put the boat down#put the boat down change outta your outfit and go have a wine night with your husband There Problem Solved#the cat cant drink wine .... checkmate ....#anyways i legally cant write another story about a man getting jealous over a cat but we can definitely crack jokes about it#spaekin of stories ... ao3 time ... my ass aint even readin cherik tf wrong with me#if im gonna dick over my sleep schedule can it at lesat be topical Never. Absolutely Never#good night everyone i will see you all in a minute :}}}#that smile so evil .. wht is that... :} lil frog mouth ... a frog aint evil i rescind that adjective#ok bye bybe :}
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#did i get it right this time?#hashirama senju#tobirama senju#got inspired by my favorite tf artist who also loves these guys apparently#i was drawing them in my new style and then my old style from when i used to draw them a lot started creeping in#im fighting muscle memory dawg#ehhhh this is more right than last time. hmmmmmm#im still trying to feel out the characters. idk you guys tell me#muscle memory but the muscles are atrophied and wrong so theyre misguiding me#i showed my brother the one thats a nrt fan and he asked me who these characters were OK buddy#ok fine ill go sleep this off and get jumpscared tomorrow#i recommend you see seafood_pie on twitter with my whole heart. she drew hstb back in august 2023
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i know there’s a lot of talk about mandroid/silas but please consider this law enforcement club/polycule
ultimately if it came down to it, Dave BotBots would win in a fight by sheer Rube Goldberg improbable bad luck looney toons shenanigans. Simmons would be fully capable of murdering TFP Megatron with his bare hands. Schloder would get along famously with Sumdac in oblivious solidarity. Fowler would have the BotBots mall packed up and moved to a secure location within like two hours. Fanzone would be the one stuck watching the collective of children and be miserable about it but he’s also the only one who would be even capable of babysitting the lot of them so he’s the best choice.
#dunce squad#please this is eating me up inside and when it finally crystallized into this meme format it blew me away#botbots#transformers#macaddam#tf bayverse#TFA#tfp#ew canon#transformers earthspark#earthspark#agent fowler#transformers meme#dave botbots#agent schloder#carmine fanzone#agent simmons#like dont get me wrong#silas and mandroid are pretty powerful#but THIS... blease i would sell my stuff for a crossover#i am a SUCKER for crossovers btw i eat them for every meal and go to sleep with them at night#hey its my birthday coming up if you wanna give me a crossover i will love u forever
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Okay so I finally finished merlin. Since I already knew about the sad parts, I was pleasantly surprised at all the fluffier moments and how precious it is to watch arthur truly recognize all merlins done for him. It's not how I would've ended the show but it was a beautiful ending.
#a lot of implications ill talk about later when im not sad and tired#oh shit its 2am#huh maybr ill go to sleep lol#it wasnt the best ending but not too bad ig#an interesting one ill say#younger me was so sensitive how tf did she not remember “HEY THIS SHOW MADE YOU FUCKING SOB DONT REWATCH IT”#i dont regret it tho i got gwen#and others but like. she is this biana or some character like that#like sm sad shit happens to her but i love her and i can never think sad thoughts about her#her and freya woukdve been friends#her reaction to merlins magic was judt ahdjfllv#bbc merlin#merlin bbc#the adventures of merlin#tiwtr-vc
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Maybe I'm not cut out for a PhD maybe i should just start drinking the chemicals with the scariest labels on them, lets end the charade that i have brain cells
#my stuff#i am really struggling this weekend i got such shit results from an experiment#and when i was reading a paper afterwards it described something that looks Awfully Similar to my own work#like not exactly but it achieves the same things#and i texted my mentor abt it and idk if we're just not looking at it the same or what but he responded back 'these are not at all the same#like ok i guess im illiterate. kill me now and save me the embarrassment of struggling on.#i don't like to be despairing but ive had headaches for weeks and my sleep schedule is in ruins from stress#every day i feel more terrified from imposter syndrome and ohhhh my god what if my heart just exploded i wouldn't even notice#i have like 2 weeks to smarten tf up or i feel like im going to get crucified and pissed on by my committee
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Crew, I had a dream last night…. About Logan…. n he was my roommate or something ❓❓and there was only one bed….😟😟😟😟😟😟😟
#I haven’t even watched Deadpool yet#tf is this#girl let me go back to sleep n try again cuz what is this#man gtfo n put Miguel back on the phone‼️#tmi but he was like obsessed w my butt in this dream#like sir ⁉️ this don’t belong to youuuuu
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