#Experiences some sort of emotion

[theresistanceneverquits]

There’s not enough people talking about how important Stephanie is to Damian’s growth pre-Flashpoint.

Bruce had seen Damian as a beast to be tamed, Tim sees him as a ticking time bomb, and Dick is far better with him but he’s still an authority figure for Damian to combat with. But then he meets Stephanie, a college-aged girl who nobody trusts and he bullies her relentlessly and becomes inseparable from her.

She doesn’t interact with him based on his past, but on what she can see. This 10 year old just threatened to kill her? Wow he doesn’t get outside much. He’s not old enough to have seen Gremlins. What do you MEAN you’ve never been inside a bouncy house before we are fixing that immediately.

They are like cousins to each other. They poke fun at each other for being lame and stupid and Dick has to tell them both to shut up. She doesn’t see him as a project to be molded and redeemed, he’s just a kid with a crappy childhood like her and if he’s nice to her for 5 seconds she’ll do something with him to let him feel like a kid. And he doesn’t look at her and see a liability or a failure or a lost cause, like everyone she’s ever interacted with does. When he’s awful to her, it’s because he’s an obnoxious preteen boy.

And then you get the “there’s room in our line of work for hope, too” scene. Because Damian has gotten to know Steph and he can’t fathom why she’s here. She obviously has had to deal with crap and is still working through being kept on a leash by Nightwing and Oracle, but she isn’t broken like the rest of them are. Damian is surrounded by people who were molded and shaped and torn down and broken to become the monoliths that they are, and then there’s this girl who seems so at peace with herself and is constantly making quips, and it’s so foreign to him.

And she tells him that she’s in his world because she believes people are worth fighting for.

[lumons]

kind of toying around with the theory that mdr is sorting out their own experiences and memories to create the rooms that gemma is going into. gemma’s rooms happen to be personal in some ways to her (the thank you cards) because mark is the one refining for her rooms. 

when mark asks about the ashes, reghabi tells him that lumon is connected with the coroners and medical examiners and we already know lumon has such a deep place within society given that they hosted the blood drive where mark and gemma met, they owned the clinic where they went for fertility care, and there’s the government official with his severed wife and the baby camp. lumon is everywhere and they’re always listening and they’re always trying to pull the strings. it’s possible that when gemma got into her accident, lumon saved her and part of this was healing her and treating her until she was fully better until they could turn around and say actually you’re not fully better yet and we need to run tests on you. lumon is in a position of power as the rescuers and saviors of her life to convince her and keep her in this place as a condition and price of her life saving treatment. 

and gemma’s probably far from the only one that lumon has done this to. they’re probably getting more test subjects through these horrific accidents and near death experiences and just repeating this research with them. when mark is first shown petey’s map one area notably is the people who live there/never leave. this sort of tells us that gemma is far from the only one and also why would she be the only one when there’s also the work of helly, irving, and dylan to consider, and of course all the other mdr departments out there in other lumon offices. 

this theory would help explain the work the other refiners are doing and make the explanation of what lumon is up to less centered specifically mark and gemma, and instead make mark and gemma just a tragic coincidence of this whole controlling corporate giant.

as to what they’re doing this for i think there’s so many possibilities but i have to assume, as is the name, mthat they’re refining the severance chips and working towards making them better and possibly commercializing them to offer people an escape from various life experiences that might be distressing or unwanted and they need the various experience of humans to do that and therefore the mdr teams are just sorting their different fears and joys and other emotions to essentially test gemma and the others like her with 

[ahalliance]

rewatching severance s2 and in e1 mark w. talks about how his branch got shut down which reminds me of how in the finale the MDR department that we know was set to be shut down once cold harbour was completed . which to me at least implies that mark w. and gwendolyn y.'s department had a similar cold harbour-esque situation that in their case was finished bc why else would their whole department have been shut down

[katsigian]

Kinda hurts a little when you've spent years creating a specific character in a specific universe for hardly anyone to see them, only for someone else to do the exact same concepts and get applauded for it. Did I just do it that badly or something

I remember when I first made all of my OCs supernatural in early 2022. I was one of the first people in [redacted] fandom who made it canon and talked openly about how my OC were vampires. And I got harassed for it endlessly. People were in my asks and dms telling me it was cringe and overpowered and lame, and that I was dumb to think anyone would care. Regardless of all of that, I kept them around and didn't stop talking about them. And then everyone else caught on and also made supernatural OCs because I helped to normalize it. Which isn't the problem, make as many supernatural OCs as you like, I'm not telling people to stop. That's not what bothers me (I have to add that disclaimer bc someone will undoubtedly try to get offended).

I think what upsets me is that it feels like I talk into a void sometimes and it sometimes feels like I don't have a place to share the things I'm proud of. I have an entire world that I made and this intertwined network of 10+ original characters and I just don't know where to talk about them or how to talk about them. I know we're "supposed to create for ourselves" and to "share it for good reasons", but it's really hard to put myself in that mindset. I don't do it for clout and I never will, I love my characters too much for that. Maybe I've just been doing a bad job of sharing anything about my world and characters, that is highly likely. I just can't help but remember the times I did share things and they went completely unnoticed

Just a little bit of acknowledgement would be nice. I think I'd be happy with that. Just a little bit of acknowledgement for the way I've had to fight to have my supernatural OCs exist in a cyberpunk setting in a hostile fandom. Just a little acknowledgement of the months of effort I put into my characters. And that would be all. Or maybe I'll learn how to just ignore everything and just keep doing as I have been. Putting my head and continuing on, savoring those small bits of genuine friendly interest when they come my way. That's good too

[orcelito]

Like OK so I've been reading a fic with trans wolfwood in it that is so. HONEST. About how it affected him and still affects him. In a way that's very much not an average cis writer portrayal of a trans character.

Like. Either this writer is trans or did plenty of research, but it just feels REAL to me. And it has me thinking about my own way of writing trans Wolfwood.

I'm not there yet. But I've been thinking about it. The ways that what the EOM did fucked him up... but it also acted as HRT that affirmed his gender. So what do you do when you're in a body you don't recognize, but looks much more like a man than ever before? There's some gender euphoria in a way, but dysphoria at the same time bc you didn't grow into this. You didn't watch yourself transition. Suddenly you just Were this, and it's not you, but also it's nice to finally be seen as a man, but it also feels wrong to feel grateful for any part of what they did to you...

On and on and on

You see? This is what I want to think about with him. This is why trans Wolfwood is so compelling to me. It's just so Complicated, he'd have such Complicated feelings about his body and the way he lives with it. He learns this new body, it starts to feel more like his, but he also mourns the fact that he didn't get to watch it grow into this like he should've.

That kind of thing.

[july-19th-club]

favorite type of villanous characters are the ones whose motivations boil down to

like they dont even have to have any stakes in the broader situation. they just have take pleasure in destruction

[longagoitwastuesday]

Kusakabe, dear, you're too beautiful to be saying that kind of stuff

[fagulaa]

im a grown ass man and im coming up with wolf 359 ocs. dont look at me

[spocks-kaathyra]

"ur repressed" okay well have u even considered that emotions r purposeless and only serve to cause harm to those around u and I have achieved a unique transcendent state beyond them. have u considered that

[invadernei]

It's great to be a person who loves Ekubo. But why do I love Ekubo? I looked at myself and I found some answers. I tried to fully describe how much I love Ekubo and in what ways I relate to him... But unfortunately right now I don't have enough energy to put it all in words.

Also this is really spontaneous, so I don't think it's a great analysis, but I hope it at least conveys the sentiment. And it's a very personal text.

I'd like to bring up two points about Ekubo: his relationship with humans and the theme of being seen. There's so much more that I love about him, but these two points are the reason why his story resonated with me so much. This is where I found that deep connection.

So... Me and people.

The thing is, I like people. I appreciate people. I'm interested in people. I care about them and their feelings. In real world, I'm often around people, but I'm almost never with people. I can't fully relate to them. I'm an invisible observer. I'm almost like... a ghost.

And the most interesting thing is, I've been like that for so long that I accepted it as an essential part of myself. I think it's my natural state. It's not bad and it's not good, it's just... there. I enjoy being the way I am, although there are still a lot of things I haven't understood about myself yet. I know there's something I'm missing. I feel that. And I don't quite understand what it is, but I keep searching and I keep trying new experiences.

In other words, I'm okay with myself, I accept that some things are just my nature and I can't change that. But it doesn't stop me from wanting to grow, and improve, and explore.

I also very much understand Ekubo's "I want to be seen and acknowledged", but from a different perspective. I create art. And I want my art to be seen and acknowledged... And since my art is a part of me, I also want to be acknowledged and accepted for who I am.

I feel this strong need to share my feelings through my art... This is the part of myself that I'm not afraid to show. I want people to see the world the way I see it. At least for a little bit. I want to feel that what I do matters. At least a little bit...

Also, I used to be very selfish and self-absorbed and I looked at everything only through the lense of my own desires and emotions, mostly during my teenage years. I've changed. And Ekubo has changed. There's hope for both of us.

Feeling different pretty much my entire life and feeling like a bystander almost everywhere, I sometimes wonder... Am I even a human?.. Well, I guess I actually am. All these doubts and complex feelings make me human. The fact that I have this complicated relationship with humanity and strive for it in my own way makes me human. And I think this can be said about Ekubo as well. The difference between us is that my experience is purely social and Ekubo's experience has a physical, supernatural layer.

But we both faced it, the experience of being different, feeling different, questioning our humanity in one way or another, finding our own understanding of it, trying to be seen and connect with the world, exploring our love for it and for other people, constantly searching for more, overcoming selfish tendencies and resentment, finding some form of self-acceptance and finally adapting.

Ekubo is very human in his non-humaneness. And it makes him such an incredible and unique character.

[gothicprep]

ngl whenever I see people try to argue that things like adhd, depression, anxiety, etc aren’t expressions of neurochemistry but are instead a reaction to capitalism or something diabolically stupid like that, it always makes me think of this old tweet:

if aliens landed on the planet tomorrow and their only measurement of earth culture was our posts, they’d probably think capitalism is a synonym for general malaise.

[moonys-chaos]

Bad and horrific hallucinations (the rare hallucinations that actually make me stop for a moment)

[lord-squiggletits]

Between TF and my other fandoms like BG3 and TES, I keep finding myself making OCs that have some element of "battle hardened hero who is actually good and righteous, but so traumatized by the toll of war that even after the war ends they feel empty/wrecked and can't enjoy the fruits of victory" and I'm not sure if it's bc I gravitate to a certain type of media where such OCs fit in best, or bc I have a specific character archetype I like and gravitate towards media that contains those things.

[happyk44]

It's kinda funny because w/ my Zeus kid OC (who I've been thinking about renaming as Araceli, 'cause it means altar of the sky, apparently, which I like 'cause sky-themed-ish but also like. A little bit I wanted something that meant cloud the way Coral's name means... Coral) the implication is that she takes after her father to an almost mirroring degree because I developed her and my other PJO OCs (who also all got retconned into an OG work) at the same time I was playing around with my ideas on the Big Six, and the gist at the time was supposed to show how the Big Six could've turned out if they weren't so weird.

So the dynamics of the friendship was supposed to be very similar to the dynamics of Big Six's relationship to each other (e.g. Mary having a major crush on Hera's "representative" but also being attracted to literally every other person that walked by, Nico being the soberminded big brother figure, etc). It's also one of the reasons Mary would get angry whenever someone would compare to her dad, because similarly I think Zeus would get angry if someone compared him to his dad.

And then eventually as I got older and the daydream moved around with whatever obsession I had at the time, the characters and general storyline began to change away from that in some ways but core features sort of stayed and so I ended up with a version of Zeus that ignores his daughter's pleas for help because he loves her but her pain hurts him because he can't do anything about it and it's his fault she's suffering.

She got this intensity from him, it's ingrained into the way it's ingrained in him. But he was able to rebuild the world according to his own needs and wants and beliefs. And she can't really do that. So he doesn't have any advice he can give her when she's on her knees begging for help with all the noise and pain in her head. He doesn't know what to do! It's like he can just go and rip it out of her.

But she's suffering because she's different and she's weird and she knows it and she knows it's his fault which is why she's asking but he just doesn't know and he can't handle watching her suffering and listening to her cry when there is no helpful answer to give her because "I don't know" isn't going to fix it.

He's supposed to fix things, he's supposed to have the answers. He's king of the world, by damn! He's a problem solver. He supposed to have a solution, and a million backup solutions. But he doesn't! There's nothing he can do to make the noise stop because truth be told, the noise never really stopped for him! It just got easier and quieter. So he turns away from her because he loves her and he's failing her and he can't handle that.

But also in the same breath, I think he recognizes similar aspects of himself in Jason, who isn't even asking for help, and fucking despises him for it, lol.

✨ Girl Dad ✨

[smile-files]

today i'm going home so i can get my flu shot and vote with my family... hopefully both go well

[lapdogchase]

Where do you get most of your autism info?

oo good question,, tbh a lot of stuff i just know cuz my both my brothers are diagnosed + my best friend growing up has it, so a lot of stuff i just kinda absorbed over the years from my family + friends. usually with factchecking that stuff i just google it and scan a couple sites that look trustworthy to see if it's something that seems widely agreed on or not before i say it conclusively

for specific online sources, i know the autism self advocacy network has a lot of good info, and embrace autism is also good. also spectrumnews.org and autistic women and nonbinary network <- these r all as far as i know but also i havent done like, a full background check on all of them so i might be incorrect

i think the main thing is double checking anything from social media or any article/news story/whatever with big red flags- it definitely varies and most of these things arent like, 100% indicators that something is wrong, more that the source might be biased or ableist or just outdated. but for me big red flags are -> allistic writer/speaker insisting on person-first language (tho thats still very common in psych spaces unfortunately), calling autism a "disease"/"epidemic" or saying it needs to be cured, the puzzle piece logo and "light it up blue" (red instead is the alternative movement for that, it's for autism Acceptance rather than awareness which is the movement with weird ableist undertones (overtones?)), that sort of thing. also checking for things written by autistic people or with imput from autistic people

also academic papers can be super dense (and somewhat ableist tbh) but they also have good information sometimes, so again just checking and seeing if there's other sources for stuff & if those look reputable

+ id say just in general be especially careful with stuff on social media bc ppl will Lie or misinterpret stuff or misremember or whatever and misinformation gets spread very very quickly . but also community is nice & can be incredibly helpful so it's difficult to completely disavow it yknow .

but yeah a lot of stuff ive learned from my family & friends over the years, and dont have super good specific sources for learning that sort of thing other than just hanging out with autistic people and absorbing stuff via osmosis HAHA but i hope some of that helps :}