#Easy to Love Difficult to Discipline
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wellnesswithkuhtrees ¡ 6 days ago
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“When your child experiences stress, stress hormones are released. One of the chemicals released is called cortisol. High cortisol levels can damage brain cells in an area called the hippocampus, which plays a major role in memory and learning.” - Dr. Becky A. Bailey PhD
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aphrodeiities ¡ 8 months ago
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ᴅᴏᴍɪᴄɪʟᴇ, ᴇxᴀʟᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ, ᴅᴇᴛʀɪᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴀʟʟ ᴘʟᴀɴᴇᴛꜱ
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paid chart readings here
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beginning with domicile planets, whenever a planet is in domicile, it means that the sign is in a planet that rules the sign ⬎
SUN ⟶ LEO.
MOON ⟶ CANCER.
MERCURY ⟶ GEMINI AND VIRGO.
VENUS ⟶ TAURUS AND LIBRA.
MARS ⟶ ARIES AND SCORPIO.
JUPITER ⟶ SAGITTARIUS AND PISCES.
SATURN ⟶ CAPRICORN AND AQUARIUS.
URANUS ⟶ AQUARIUS.
NEPTUNE ⟶ PISCES.
PLUTO ⟶ SCORPIO.
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exalted planets happen whens a planet is in a sign it can easily display its energy through.
SUN ⟶ ARIES.
♇  people with an aries sun could find it easier compared to other sun signs to be a leader, knowing how to control their impulses and goals. might have it easy when it comes to support from others
MOON ⟶ TAURUS.
♇ people with a taurus moon could find it easier compared to other moon signs to emotionally nurture themselves and other people. could be talented at styling, baking or cooking. could find it easy to find beauty within themselves.
MERCURY ⟶ VIRGO.
♇ people with a virgo mercury could find it easier compared to other mercury signs to speak to other people, being able to control their anxiety. knowing how to read a room and humour people around them.
VENUS ⟶ PISCES.
♇ people with a pisces venus could find it easier compared to other venus signs to know what type of love they deserve. how to create art and love others. can understand art and beauty better than others and can be empathetic.
MARS ⟶ CAPRICORN.
♇ people with a capricorn mars could find it easier compared to other mars sign to be ambitious, aim for their goals and having discipline. know how to follow rules and be respect by others and being individuals who can be healthy with having authority or they can learn to be, having much responsibilities and knowing what to do with it.
JUPITER ⟶ CANCER.
♇ people with a cancer jupiter are very empathetic people, can make a name for themselves and are excellent at creating a foundation, a home to themselves and other people. care-taking and can handle money good.
SATURN ⟶ LIBRA.
♇ people with a libra saturn can be very diplomatic people, can age very beautifully, and are respected by those around them. this placement can indicate that the individual likes peace and can move to social groups who can give them that, know how to cut off people.
URANUS ⟶ SCORPIO.
♇ people with scorpio uranus can be very imaginative and psychic, they know how to follow their gut-feeling and are excellent at being friends as they can be ride or dies. those with this placement can be people who always find a way to make money, could be considered a genius.
NEPTUNE ⟶ LEO.
♇ people with leo neptune can be amazing performers, the stage is for them, i believe the iconic stars we know who have passed do have leo neptune. they are the most photographed people as well, people who belong to leo neptune are people who can connect with others very easily, thus their fame.
PLUTO ⟶ LEO AND ARIES.
♇ people with leo or aries pluto are innovative and assertive, leaders who can make a change and have influence to the people around them. can be very trendy people and could always leave a mark when they leave.
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planets in detriment move differently to how a planet in a sign is supposed to, it could be difficult for the native to express the themes of the planet through the sign, but they end up having a unique perspective of it that amazes others at the end. the planets are normally in opposite signs they usually rule.
SUN ⟶ AQUARIUS.
♇ instead of thinking of self, aquarius suns are people who think for everyone. being those who are humanitarians and seeing the true potential of the world. they bring out the unique side of themselves society arent used to, but because of this they become trendsetters.
MOON ⟶ CAPRICORN.
♇ instead of being emotionally open, capricorn moons must learn how to love thyself. and during that time of loving themselves, they become emotionally wise and can teach others how to do the same, the love they werent necessarily taught, can be given and taught to their children, if they want them.
MERCURY ⟶ SAGITTARIUS AND PISCES.
♇ instead of being direct and forward, [even though sagittarius mercuries can be] people who are sagittarius and pisces mercuries learn to read between the lines. being those who can decipher the unseen and because of that and of their depth, they can come up with think-pieces people have not heard before.
VENUS ⟶ ARIES AND SCORPIO.
♇ instead of being soft and stereotypically "feminine" those of aries or scorpio venus learn to be bold with their passion and their sense of style. they're people who learn to handle and balance the feminine and masculine essence, being innovative and authentic with how they display themselves, they usually inspire other people and become muses in fashion.
MARS ⟶ LIBRA AND TAURUS.
♇ instead of being tough and stereotypically "masculine" those of libra and taurus mars learn to be diplomatic with their anger and passion. thought sometimes this could lead them into being passive and non-confrontational. this placement[s] helps them become people who are very patient.
JUPITER ⟶ GEMINI AND VIRGO.
♇ by not being the usual people who are used to abundance, those with gemini and virgo jupiter can be over-whelmed by how fast life moves around them, however it helps them with multi-tasking, being people who can ease the fast thoughts in their mind, if not careful, they can become people who are too relaxed with how life is and end up stalling.
SATURN ⟶ CANCER AND LEO.
♇ by not being the usual people who are used to comfort and nurture, those with cancer and leo in saturn learn to become nurturers and emotionally intelligent. at first, they can be awkward with signs of physical affection, but they go through the journey of loving their body, their inner-child and the lessons life has taught them about self-acceptance.
URANUS ⟶ LEO.
♇ by not being the usual people who are used to society accepting who they are, people with uranus in leo learn to navigate life with comprehending that not everyone is going to love them because of their big energy. they're people who are usually the life of the party, but the uranus in leo puts a social battery in them which causes them to go into hermit mode, but it helps them go on the journey of understanding themselves without the need or help of other people.
NEPTUNE ⟶ VIRGO.
♇ by not being the usual people who are used to order and preciseness, those with neptune in virgo get confused, especially in their mind. could have a lot of deja vu moments that makes them feel crazy. they become more in touch with the spiritual side of life instead of the physical, reaching out to the higher-self and becoming spiritual moguls.
PLUTO ⟶ TAURUS.
♇ by not being the usual people who are used to vast intensity, they are people who have to learn to control their sensuality, their greediness and even possessiveness, this placement is a huge twist to the usual taurus slow-pace, they learn that life doesnt move the way they want it to move and learn to become adaptable in scenarios that involve them thinking quick on their feet.
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when planets are in fall they have to find a different and original way to comprehend themselves, there is a big struggle but they gain knowledge and wisdom through the planet they're in.
SUN ⟶ LIBRA.
♇ those with sun in libra might struggle with finding their place in society, so this can cause them to become people-pleasers and even walking matts to everyone around them. they need to learn to live for themselves and not for the pleasure of other people.
MOON ⟶ SCORPIO.
♇ those with moon in scorpio struggle with finding eternal peace, its chaos in their mind and heart, they're vengeful as they normally interact with people who have malicious intent, could be friends or family members, what they have to do is end the cycle, becoming people who transform the hateful energy into something that is healing and creative for themselves and even other people, that's why a lot of musicians that are mass-liked have a scorpio moon, ex, beyonce, miley cyrus, kali uchis and the weeknd.
MERCURY ⟶ PISCES.
♇ those with mercury in pisces struggle with finding confidence, they might've been people who have been ridiculed and pushed to the side by others who demean their intelligence and their spiritual views in life. thus, becoming people who find their tribe who aid them on their journey of being assured.
VENUS ⟶ VIRGO.
♇ those with venus in virgo struggle with finding their true self, thus their need for perfection in themselves and other people. they have to learn to become less controlling and be pleased and grateful for the things and people in their lives.
MARS ⟶ CANCER.
♇ those with mars in cancer struggle with being assured, always double-backing or stalling in projects they can thrive in. always thinking what they give is the worst, paranoia strikes for cancer martians, so they become dependent to other people to make them confident, finding their individuality is a big theme in their life.
JUPITER ⟶ CAPRICORN.
♇ individuals with jupiter in capricorn normally do have it better than most capricorn in planet placements as jupiter gives it a great boost, however as it is in fall, capricorn jupiter natives learn to be people who build their foundations from the start to the top, having to be people who had to become responsible and serious at a young age, most of their childhood might've been taken away from them, so people with this placement learn to have fun with childhood nostalgia that might've been taken away from them.
SATURN ⟶ ARIES.
♇ individuals with saturn in aries have to learn to be disciplined, with aries being such a fiery and excited sign, [plus even a bit immature], the saturn essence practically forces the sign to take life more seriously, they end up becoming people who start projects and goals and finish them instead of leaving it midway through the process. stepping into the roles of leaders, saturn in aries natives learn to be people who can exercise their authority position towards events that can have them flourish in the future.
URANUS ⟶ TAURUS.
♇ individuals with uranus in taurus learn to be people who are unique with the ideas they come up with, most uranus in taurus people are uncomfortable in this placement, because it goes against everything they're used to, peace? now there's chaos? slowness? now its fast. though this makes them very versatile people, when it comes to cooking, baking, writing and even having a unique singing voice people can recognise.
NEPTUNE ⟶ AQUARIUS.
♇ individuals with neptune in aquarius learn to be those who have to break out of social "norms" that are actually unhealthy, this is why many of them make up worlds in their own mind. it's like a way to be free from what society puts them through, however, the coping mechanism can become toxic as they slowly begin to get trapped in their own minds, being maladaptive day-dreamers and unintentionally stopping themselves from taking on tasks in the real life, unaware with how much time passes by, when they finally snap out of it they realise how much time they have lost that could've been used for them to progress in life, what they need to learn is being able to separate dreams and reality and not fall into their own built matrix.
PLUTO ⟶ LIBRA.
♇ individuals with pluto in libra learn to be people who dont need chaos in their life, learning that being negative is really draining. they then become people who allow life to carry them, being non-confrontational with disasters that happen in front of them, unfortunately this sometimes causes them to be people who do nothing in their life. howbeit, this can manifest into them being people who take control, being leaders, politics and humanitarians, they're a huge force and people can end up fearing/respecting it.
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elicathebunny ¡ 1 year ago
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FINALLY CLOSING THE GAP BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR HIGHEST SELF IN 2024.
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You are going to STOP scrolling endlessly for self-help and advice content and you are going to STOP and apply the knowledge you have endlessly gained. Obtaining help and advice knowledge is useless if it goes through one ear and comes straight out the other. STOP becoming addicted to the idea of scrolling and scrolling for your problems yet you already have the resources to fix them. A fool is a person who cannot decide to take action despite having access to the information needed to do so.
BREAKING FREE FROM THE SCROLLING CYCLE
Learning and Applying is one thing, but Learning and Staying Stationary is literally brain rot. You're addicted to the idea of change and the end result, but you never take the steps towards discipline with a personal structure to get that result. You keep looking for quick fixes and easy hacks, but life is not a quick fix and no hack can elevate your life from 0% to 100% without visiting the rest of the numbers first.
TAKE A BREAK FROM SCROLLING
Take time away from your usual scrolling and learn to be on your own. Learn your own ways of self-care, learn what works for you and understand what you need, because nobody is the same. Following a millionaire's morning routine will not make you a millionaire. This routine has worked for someone to feel and be productive in the morning and was probably curated over the years to suit their current lifestyle. So, seeing other people's successes and comparing their working ways to your life is unrealistic if you are not in a position to implement them. Going straight from 0% (Being unproductive and procrastinating) to 100% (Being incredibly Productive and in tune with self) will not be sustainable for someone who has not built the discipline and the inner foundations required for it. STOP seeing information online and taking it without ALTERING anything to your personal situation.
STOP ASKING HOW TO AND JUST DO
"How to lose weight, How to become more social, How to do this and that"
Most of these things you ALREADY know the answer to. Everybody knows that to lose weight, you need to burn more than you consume. There is literally no other way, no magic and no secret hack, just that simple fact. I guarantee you know that to become more social you just have to be social. Learn to be comfortable in social situations which will require inner work, but it's not a difficult concept. Most of us know what we need to do, yet we still try to find quick fixes or another way that same message is presented to us differently. We act as if we are improving and developing on our "improvement" journey yet we are just finding coping ways to feel like we are moving, yet we are still in the exact same place as before. I know you know what to do, I know you have researched what you should do and ways you can do it. So why are you not doing it? Why are you still not where you want to be? If you are not where you want to be, then what you're currently doing needs to change. You cannot do the exact same thing you've been doing for years and expect a different outcome. You need to curate a routine suited to your needs that is realistic and achievable to adopt.
LEARNING TO MOVE ON YOUR OWN, STOP DEPENDING ON OTHERS TO FUEL YOUR SUCCESS JOURNEY LISTEN TO: NOBODY IS COMING TO SAVE YOU BY JULIENHIMSELF Make yourself your safe space, your foundation. When you see yourself in the mirror you should be able to tell yourself "I love you", you should be so sure in what you do that nobody else can contradict what you believe in yourself, this is the end goal of self-improvement. Many of us have put aside our goals because we "are not ready", "people may judge us" or "I need to be/achieve ___ to.." Now don't get me wrong, I'm on this journey with you. I write on this blog to teach my brain how to think in the higher mindset that I'm creating for myself. I too have thoughts like this which is why in 2024 we are going to break out of our old selves to make room for our new selves together. We have to lose ourselves to find ourselves. If you're mood and self-worth are controlled by other people's opinions, then you will never advance further with yourself and will remain stationary. You have to stop allowing other people to determine whether you are allowed to pursue your desires or if you shouldn't because of fear of rejection. Don't take life too seriously, we are only here for so much time. So what if people make fun of you? In a few years will you look back and be proud and fulfilled of your past or feel regret and disappointment? LISTEN TO: WHY YOU CARE SO MUCH BY JULIANHIMSELF + LISTEN TO: HOW TO DETACH BY VICKITA TRIVEDI
The only way to get to 0%-100% is by doing.
Embody your potential
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pomefioredove ¡ 10 months ago
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summary: vil falling in love with you type of post: short fic characters: vil schoenheit additional info: romantic, FLUFF, reader is yuu, reader is gender neutral, takes place during/after book 6 author's note: vilyuu is such a good and underrated dynamic I'm never not obsessed with it. always thinking about him. holding them like dolls making them kiss mwah mwah
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One might be bold enough to assume that actor and model Vil Schoenheit had been a victim of Eros before.
With the world under his thumb and millions of adoring fans at his beck and call, it was easy to fantasize about the image of a shining star that had left a string of broken hearts behind him. His persona of perfection gave off such a dazzling impression that any other truth is simply unimaginable. Beautiful, talented, devoted...
...Untouchable to such a degree that the very truth of the matter was that Vil Schoenheit had never been in love. He had no use, let alone time, to indulge himself in something that he found distracting at best and frustrating at worst. For most of his life, romance was nothing but another part to play, a frustrating rumor to dispel, a disaster to witness, something that nagged at him from the outside yet never made itself a home within him.
This idea of the confident heartbreaker Vil Schoenheit was nothing but a reflection of the image he put out, shone back at him by tabloids and fan accounts. It was a hollow interpretation, fueled by fantasies of a Vil that didn't exist in flesh and blood. And so, every time an invasive interviewer or pesky reporter inquired about the state of his personal affairs, he answered truthfully: Vil Schoenheit could easily go throughout life focusing solely on his career, on improving himself, and not miss out on anything at all.
There have been very, very few things that Vil has called himself an idiot over. That answer was one of them.
Because the very second he saw you again after being separated by Styx, the want to smack you for being so reckless in coming after him was only secondary to his want to hold you and cry until his water-proof mascara was running.
Love is such a strange emotion. Vil could never understand why Rook was so obsessed with it, how the vice housewarden fell in love with every beautiful person he saw. For his whole life Vil thought it to be painful, to be distracting, to be finite and often times nothing but a shallow reflection of all of one's ugliest traits.
And now, it made him feel weak and messy. He hated feeling messy.
...And yet, what he wouldn't do to have his lipstick smeared over your mouths. To have you see him with his hair undone and eyes bleary with sleep, and to see you in that state as well. It was not the time, nor the place, but he wanted to cradle you in his arms until this terrible, sickly feeling of longing you'd left him with went away.
For the first time in his life, Vil was suddenly terrified of being alone.
No, not alone- he was terrified of being without you.
To never see your smile again would be a fate worse than death, worse than growing old and haggard. How terrible to think that just one simple person could so easily undo everything about him, and yet, he wanted more of that very feeling. He would unwrap himself layer by layer for you if you asked, taking off all of the years of discipline and poise, and lay vulnerable before you so that you could be soft and simple together. Vil had always regarded romance as difficult, but falling in love with you was surprisingly easy.
He did not have to save Grim from the Underworld, despite what he claimed. Such a risky move cost him everything he loved, everything beautiful about him, everything except for you. And as much as he mourned for himself, he knew he would do it again and again if it meant saving the smile on your face.
And perhaps he was too wishful with his thinking, but he could have sworn he saw that same familiar glimmer of affection and admiration in your eyes when you met his gaze. As if you couldn't even see the pasty, wrinkled mess he'd turned into, and were peering at something behind it.
It made him feel utterly exposed and offered him no comfort, but the thought that you were looking at something not even he could see lingered in the back of his mind, even after his magical energy was rejuvenated.
He had become so familiar with everyone around him being a mirror, reflecting his carefully crafted image right back at him, showering him with two-dimensional praises, that being seen as an object of flesh and blood and tears was a strange notion. To behold his presence and see a person with wants and needs and flaws rather than a flat surface, a decorative magazine atop a coffee table, left him with a strange feeling in his chest. The thought both bothered and warmed him.
Vil Schoenheit was so hopelessly in love with you, and it didn't hurt. It wasn't difficult or ugly or forced, it took not even the least bit of effort. He sunk into the feeling like a warm bath which never grew colder, and he let that be his new reality. It felt strange to imagine that there was a time where he didn't love you, where he didn't look at you as if you were the moon itself, where you weren't such a part of his being that he couldn't imagine life without you.
And he never expressed these feelings in words. They existed inside of him, running through his veins like the very blood that kept him alive and warm, and they weren't distracting, just another part of him that he kept tucked away to occupy his thoughts on rainy days.
...But the best part of it was that he didn't need words. Because when you looked at him, when you saw the Vil that not even he could see, you could already tell they were there. The mirror, the pane of glass that had always existed between himself and others, was non-existent for you.
Vil thought that someday he might be able to see himself through that glass the way you did, but he was perfectly content with simply looking at you instead for the time being.
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8housevenus ¡ 3 months ago
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sun sign & your charm
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aries sun - you are charming in your assertion to your passions. you have such strong sense of direction and you reek of ambition. your ability to go after your hustles is admirable by others. you exude a natural confidence in your mannerisms. you appear almost as if you have no fears. people find you reliable and often look to you to get something done, they know you make a way out of no way. you are overcomers and overachievers. you have a striking aura and others can see that you know exactly what you want, your intentions are always visible because you express your heart's desires with no intent of backing down. good at holding your own and standing up for yourself as well as others. your charm can be intimidating, but respectable, nonetheless.
taurus sun - you are charming in your mannerisms, the way you put so much time and effort into your physical appearance is admirable. you take care of your wellbeing and your physicality. well-kept and tidy, you are a creative heart and pick up on your environment pretty well. it's easy for others to feel close to you or comfortable around you. very receptive and grounded; you are a visionary but also a realist. people often think you have more than you do, you convey a rich and clean energy about you. your politeness takes you a long way through life.
gemini sun - your charm stems from your words. it's what you say and how you say it that makes others feel so connected to you. you are slick, quick-minded, and find it easier to talk to anybody. your ability to improvise is admirable, you seem very comfortable in your expressions, and you learn something new from others while they learn something from you at the same time. the way you are able to be so loose and intelligent, you are very blessed with being able to go from rational and serious to fun and sarcastic. you are very good at mirroring qualities and finding ways to illuminate yours in your environment.
cancer sun - your charm stems from your vulnerability. your ability to analyze situations, pick up on others' emotions, and create a comfortable space to others is very admirable. you find ease in expressing your feelings and it is a very likable quality about you. you can relate to anybody and empathize very well. good at listening to others and articulating difficult feelings into words. you tend to be more private as an individual, but you don't mind stepping outside of your zone when somebody needs a shoulder to cry on or lay their head to laugh with. your familiarity to others generates warmth and ease.
leo sun - your charm comes from your inner-light, whenever you are doing what you love, you have a brightness that exudes from you. people love to see you happy, because you uplift others in the same sense. you have a youthful energy that helps you alleviate your emotional levels. the night is always so young with you, and as long as you're in the same vicinity as everyone else, they're able to get hype. you are good at building an experience for yourself and others, bringing attention naturally is one of your best qualities. you seem raw, self-made, and egotistical in a very commendable way. the way you put yourself first, others take a lot of inspiration from it.
virgo sun - you are charming from your discipline. you seem super put together, orderly, and resilient. the way you have a calm and collected demeanor is well-liked. your style is more modest, and you are liked for your honesty & cooperation. others can always ask you for your honest opinion and you can always tell it how it is. you're witty, friendly, and value order in your life. others can see that you are goal oriented and stay busy. not only that, but you are very giving in your environment. you can do workloads, and still feel like you can contribute more. people really admire all that you can do for yourself.
libra sun - your charm comes from your magnetic demeanor and aesthetic. your sense of individuality is very polarizing. you are a catch to many people who you come across. your fixations in your personal hobbies are admirable, and you maintain yourself very well. your need for order and balance is obvious, as you love to hyper fixate on appearing perfect sometimes. people like that you are vigilant to your physical appearance, always keeping a polished image. others take inspiration from your niches.
scorpio sun - your charm stems from your intensity. your willingness to trust your adrenaline rushes to bring you to the finish line, you are private and powerful in an admirable way. others can just look you in the eye and feel like there's a mystery that needs to be uncovered about you. being unknown and confident is what others find charming about you, many secret admirers, yet you probably already know this. strong-minded and analytical, you have an impeccable emotional drive.
sagittarius sun - you are charming from your optimism. the way you naturally get lucky in so many departments, others find very amusing about you. you try new things without many attachments and love growing in new areas. straightforward and honest, you are wise and seek new forms of abundance. you love to change and others find it very respectable about you. you take risks and accept failures much better than most, which is what ultimately helps you get back on your feet again. you can alleviate and humor situations, very lighthearted and easy to like by others.
capricorn sun - your charm comes from your success. from a young age, you have always been seen as successful or conquerors of struggle. you have a serious and more resilient mannerism about you; however it is respectable by others because you navigate life with the intention of elevating to bigger levels. others feel like you are set for life. your mental agility to think things through and evaluate what others want from you is a strong quality that represents you. you're reliable, premeditated, and structured-well. others admire your approach to any form of work and how prompt you are to finish endeavors compared to anybody else.
aquarius sun - you are charming from your differences. others see you as a gamechanger in humanity, you bring new shifts and ideas to the table. your ability to change the dynamics of your environment is admirable about you, you are able to break free from patterns and cycles much easier than others. you have strong individuality and have a good understanding of life and other aspects of it. the way you can really affect the trajectory of long-lasting traditions is commendable. people like you because you always aim for the betterment of others and yourself.
pisces sun - you're charming in your knowledge. you accumulate so much just from your intuition and interactions. others find you very needed in their environment, because you bring a sense of knowing that not even, they can grasp. you are naturals in your art and understanding your psyche. others admire how trustable you are and your diplomacy to the spaces you enter. the way you can base your decisions off of just your feelings is more powerful than you think, it is a gift that you can back yourself better than others. you are fueled by creativity and imagination; other people love your wishful thinking and your mediative energy.
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acapelladitty ¡ 10 months ago
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Smoke Them All
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Pairing: Cooper Howard/F!Reader
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Link to AO3
Summary: Not content with the litany of bruises and bite marks which he has littered across your skin, Cooper decides on something a little more permanent. (2.2k words)
(tw for: spanking, rough play, branding, fingering, orgasm, pain kink, dom/sub dynamics, subspace, allusions to cannibalism, cum eating, mild aftercare)
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You hear the swish of his hand as it arcs through the air a split moment before the connecting smack rings out loudly and fresh fire flares in your unprotected ass.
"That's eight, little killer." Cooper muses as his open palm comes to settle against your skin, the flesh feeling raw and heated due to his vicious strikes, and his fingers trace the unseen outlines of his hand prints as they litter your ass. "You're almost warmed up for the main event."
Anxiety laced with a wicked arousal floods your groin, your cunt feeling slippery and neglected as you consider the small metal brand which sits in the nearby fire - the end balanced where the fire was at it hottest to ensure a clean imprint.
The brand had been his idea, a casual and sleazy comment given life by your own curiosity, but the spanking was just an added boon and Cooper was never one to deny himself the chance to dole out a little bit of good ol' fashioned discipline when the mood suited him.
So here you were, braced over his lap as the evening moon shone high in the sky. The surrounding area was dead of life, raiders and monsters having been long snuffed out, and any potential new onlookers had been provided their chance to scarper at the presence of the infamous ghoul. It was luck that the night air wasn't too chilled, not that it would have made a difference to either of you as you set about your combined goal.
The first few strikes had been pretty manageable as Cooper targeted different parts of your ass, quickly and efficiently trying to cover and redden up as much skin as possible while his other hand pinned your lower back to his knees. His tattered jacket flared out from behind him, the ratty ends touching the ground just beside your own fingers as you pressed them against the ground to keep balance.
Cooper, however, hadn't been as impressed with your easy management of his punishment.
C'mon now, little songbird, I want to hear that lovely voice.
And his efforts had quickly doubled as he brought his hand down with much more violence, the next two strikes coming in rapid succession as they glanced off the fullest part of your ass and stole the breath from your lungs. It was like being struck by metal. Hard. Unforgiving. And so fucking good.
He got the reaction he wanted as your playful groans dissolved into pathetic squeals when his fingers groped at the stinging flesh, your knees pulling together as you smeared the growing wetness that was developing between your thighs. The following hits were much the same, his accurate hand having targeted the same patch of skin until you could feel the heat buzzing free of the abused flesh as small whimpers stole from your throat freely.
"You're lucky I ain't using my belt, darling." Cooper growls as he disrupts your thoughts, tugging at your hair to force your head back enough to gaze up at him. "Cause the welts that leaves would paint you purple for a week and give you a harsh reminder of it every time that fine ass wanted to sit down anywhere."
"Yes, sir." Fumbling over the words, your fingers scratch against the dirt of the ground as your cunt feels swollen and painfully abandoned. You swear you could feel yourself dripping with mess but since he hadn't commented on it yet, maybe not.
"Might even use the buckle." Your scalp burns from his rough grasp and the extension of your neck makes breathing difficult as he continues. "Let it tear strips off you until you're a sobbing mess just crying out and begging for me to let up on you. You want that?"
Rubbing your thighs together at the open threat, you gasp and whine under his grip. From this position, you are barely able to make out his expression as your vision is also limited by the unshed tears which gather in your eyes, vision blurring due to the pain and frustration.
"N-no, sir."
"Good answer, darlin', cause i don't want to delay the next part any longer than we need to. You think you're ready for it?"
His hand releases your head and you nod frantically as fear lances your heart. A little masochism was fine by you, hot as fuck actually as it made the pleasure all the sweeter, but the brand would hurt like hell. Your heart beating a messy tune in your chest, your breath stutters as you feel him leaning over you to snatch up the brand from the fire.
"You gonna lie there like a good girl while I fix and mark you up? Hmm?" Cooper asked, his hand spreading your ass as textured fingers roll over the area he intends to mark on your right ass cheek. "I've got the rope ready to go if you can't hold still and let me make a clean print."
"Do it, Cooper." You gasp out, body shaking with anticipation as your eyes squeeze shut, preparing for the hurt to come as your hands visibly shake against the dusty ground. "Make me yours. Only yours. Make it so that everyone in the wastelands can see who the fuck they're messing with if they mess with me."
"Language." Tutting his disapproval with a playful hypocrisy, the rough excitement in his voice speaks of just how eager he was for you to have this mark. Well, that and the way that his cock remains pressing between you, the rock-hard length digging into your stomach with every slight movement as he speaks again.
"After this you're mine. Anyone else touches you then I take their throat. No mercy."
"No mercy." You repeat, almost a hypnotic babble as your breathing grows more and more erratic and anxious.
"I don't claim much in the wastelands, darlin', so you be good to me and I'll make sure that you never get the chance to forget what it means, you hear?"
"Goddamn, Cooper. Just do it! Mark me, brand me, give me something. Just- FUCK!"
It was nothing compared to the previous spanking.
The pain is indescribable as the metal presses harshly against your skin, searing his initials into the reddened flesh of your ass. You bury your scream in your forearm, tasting blood as your teeth clamp together roughly around your own flesh, and it's only his hand - hard as steel and twice as unforgiving - which prevents you from bucking in place to avoid the horrid pain.
Darkness dances in your vision for a moment as a genuine fear that you're going to pass out clenches your heart but it sweeps through rapidly, leaving you teetering on the edge of consciousness for only a few seconds.
You don't feel the brand pull free as the metal essentially kills off your nerve endings, the damage welcome as it dulls the initial shock. Rather, the initial sear is quick to settle into a vicious pain which is more like a deep, heated ache that sits beneath your skin.
"Cooper." You howl, fingers scrambling against his closet leg as you desperately seek something to cling onto as a wave of nausea rolls through your stomach. "Hurts."
Violently sobbing at the residual ache, you remain pinned in place as his free hand audibly drops the brand to the sandy floor before his fingers return to your ass. You can't feel him ghosting his digits along the wound but you're fairly certain that's what he's doing as a rumble of approval slips free of his chest.
"I know it hurts like a motherfucker." Cooper exhales, his roughened voice holding a giddiness as he watches you struggle to keep control of yourself. "But you did so well, girlie. Took it better than most would and I think that deserves a reward."
His fingers follow the curve of your ass to drop and press insistently at your hole - two digits sinking deep as they quickly provide a little relief to the aching neglect which your cunt was experiencing.
Audibly delighted with his markings, Cooper's tone is as predatory as ever as he slowly pumps his fingers into your cunt - following a pattern he knows drives you wild as he continues.
"Smells good too. Ain't gonna lie. Wish I'd taken a strip for myself before I burned it away."
Shivering at that, you moan out something that may have been an encouragement or a denial - your brain too fuzzy to make sense of it as his textured fingers rub along your walls.
"Coop-Cooper." You stutter out his name, sharp breaths feeling hot in your lungs as the adrenaline flushing through your veins - made all the worse by the dual sensations of dull pain and growing pleasure which wracked your lower half - causes a light-headedness which leaves you slack against his knees. "Touch me more. Make the pain go away."
"Can't make it go away, sweetheart. But I can make you forget about it for a minute or two."
With two fingers still curled within you, his thumb slides up your slickened folds until it grazes your clit. Body tensing, you sigh and groan as he teases the sensitive nub by gently circling his thumb across it. It didn't help that the leathered skin was so much rougher than a typical man's and the added sensation of it was enough to make you forget the burn of your ass as you focus on it.
His fingers are skilled and he is quick to target all those sweet, wicked little spots that make your mouth dry and your soaked cunt clench around his probing digits; that bastard thumb of his never letting up its teasing pressure on your clit as he strokes along the engorged nub with a lazy enjoyment. Adrenaline making every nerve feel heightened, your earlier neglect and enjoyment of his hand bring you close to the edge with an embarrassing speed.
"Such a tight little thing." Cooper grunts, his groin grinding against your stomach lightly as he plays you like a fiddle while taking care not to damage the fresh brand. "Can barely get my fingers out with you gripping at them like this. You'd have thought by now I'd have loosened you up at least a little."
Unable to speak, your reply is a mess of jerking nods and gasping pants. But he seemed to catch the jist of your agreement and it causes a low chuckle to rumble through his body.
Slipping a third finger in, the added stretch was all it took to have your toes curling against the air as the building tension in your body snapped into rolling waves of pleasure. Your cunt clenches around his fingers, pulling them deeper as they continue to rub against your sweet spot, drawing your orgasm out until your limbs felt tight and your throat started to burn from the constant whining and pleas that trickle free of it.
Shuddering and feeling faint, you lay limply against his knees, feet touching the ground as you actively fight the euphoric nausea which makes your body feel light and far off. It was too much and instead of facing the aches and pleasures, you allow the weariness to slip within your very bones.
A lurid suckling noise makes your head turn up to the side and you catch the sight of Cooper pulling his fingers free of his mouth, the digits slickened by both your mess and his spit as he messily cleans them off.
"Sweet as honey. Ain't nothing like it." He mutters, mostly to himself, before tilting his head down to meet your eye. "You alright down there? Not gonna pass out on me are you?"
Sighing out as darkness touches at the edge of your vision, you give him a soft smile - bottom lip only slightly trembling as you answer. "Sleepy."
He's surprisingly careful as he picks you up with his impressive strength, hands wrapping around your upper body to right you to your feet - shaking legs barely able to hold even your limited weight - before he deposits you in his lap. Angling your body atop his so that the pressure of your ass on his lap is far away from the fresh brand, your head presses against his clothed chest and you inhale the coppery scent that clings to him like it was a lifeline.
"Then sleep and I'll keep the beasts at bay."
Cooper speaks lowly, the words washing over you skin like a soothing blanket. "Here." His hands wrap the edges of his leather jacket around your sides, the material not enough to cover you completely - not even close - but you appreciate the gesture regardless.
In the warm night air, your thighs coated in the mess of your release and your ass throbbing will a dull ache that was going nowhere any time soon, you focus on the interesting sounds which roll through Cooper's chest as you press your ear against his frayed shirt and allow fatigue to finally claim you.
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Another Stalker!Konig x Reader Fic
Summary: Konig has an unhealthy obsession with you. AO3
Word Count: 5k
Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Masturbation, Abusive Relationships, Unreliable Narrator, No use of y/n
He had officially lost control over himself.
Konig knew he’d been a little off. Maybe even borderline perverted - but he’s always been good at keeping his darker desires buried with all the other horrific thoughts and traumatic memories that come with his career choices. He was good at that, repressing the difficult things and pushing forward. A soldier has to be.
But you.
You brought it out of him.
It was all your fault, really. You were coaxing the corruption from him, undoing years of rigorous training and discipline.
Not that you were aware. Konig made very sure of that. There were a lot of close calls, too. Decisions he had made out of pure impulse. It’s your fault. He can’t think straight when you’re around, he loses control over himself.
He knows he should quit you. Logically, rationally - he knows this isn’t good for him. It’s not good for you. It’s just not healthy. He should quit you, cold turkey. Forget every little detail he’s learned about you. Stop following you around. Let you free.
He’s tried.
Every time he sees you around base, his gaze is held captive by those beautiful eyes and that silky head of hair, you steal his breath. It’s like he’s lived his entire life in the cruel cold and you were a roaring fire of warmth he’s never known. Your warmth pooled in his chest and spread through his limbs and he could feel you burning beneath his skin. It ignites the complex and dark feelings and he’s convinced that it’s destiny that put you here. That the world was giving you to him on a silver platter.
That you’re his.
Who would be there to watch over you, to protect you? Who will make sure you get back to your quarters safe every night? Who will make sure that the fresh recruits won't get too handsy with you? Who will keep a watchful eye on you in the field - such a small delicate little thing doing such a dangerous job.
But most importantly - who will worship you, like you deserve to be worshiped?
He’s never interacted with you. You probably don't even know he exists. On the surface, he'd say it's because he's nervous. That it’s normal for a guy to avoid a pretty girl. But he knows that it's really because he has to protect you from himself. That he's just an oozing cesspool of unresolved emotional baggage with atrcosious desires. He can't let you too close, no. Doesn't want to hurt you, to dull your light in anyway. He doesn't trust himself with you. Can't control himself around you, throwing caution to wild. He’s afraid of what he's capable of doing to you. What he wants to do to you.
You were his. You just didn't know it yet.
——————————————————————
Friday night was difficult for Konig, as it usually was. It was easy to follow you around base, so convenient that you had both worked together. He was supposed to be there, shielded with plausible deniability and equipped with home field advantage.
A more casual environment was a challenge for him. He didn't exactly blend in among the locals. It's difficult for him - to juggle the harsher risk of getting caught following you around town as opposed to base, while also crippled by his large stature.
At least the team was getting inebriated tonight, it's easier to go unnoticed when everyone’s too drunk to be fully aware of their surroundings.
Watching you have a good time sparks conflicting feelings for Konig. He loves to see that radiant smile. Usually you're so modest, always a polite smile, never letting your face warp. The beer, though, turns your insecurities to ash and your cheeks a rosy blush - you don't seem to hold back as much. Your smile is toothy and face-wrinkling, so genuine, it makes Konig feel like he can't breathe, eyes locked on to you like he's frozen in time. He knows he's not worthy of that smile, but he wants it.
It should be him making you smile like that.
He can hear your laugh from his booth in the dimmest corner of the dingy bar if he tilts his head just right, and listens carefully. Drown out the over-the-top music and incessant pub chatter. He could get intoxicated off your laugh, unrestricted and fueled by the alcohol. It makes him feel so warm to hear your authentic laugh.
It should be him making you laugh like that.
He loves seeing you enjoy yourself, he does. He wants nothing more than to see you happy and he works hard to do so.
And yet you give your joy away to others, - not the polite smiles and fake laugh you dull down for others - the real ones. The ones that come from deep within and give breath to any room you're in. Giving them away freely, and to who? Your co-workers? Your acquaintances?
Over what? A cheap joke?
He bets that it wasn't even funny. Not that you didn't have a good sense of humor, no, he loved your sense of humor.
It’s just... did you really have to rub it in?
You didn't see it, but you really did have the power to make a room so much more livelier. Konig hates not being in the same room as you. And he hates that in most rooms you're in, those hard-headed jocks from 141 followed. You'd been indoctrinated quickly. He can't blame you, you're naive, trusting, still new. You're quick, though, you’ll learn soon enough. You didn't see them for what they really were yet.
Not worthy of you.
Not worthy of your perfect laugh and radiant smile and quick wit and sharp field skills.
He despised that they get a front row seat and he has the wait in the shadows for scraps, working incredibly hard to lap up the leftovers of what you give out to them for free.
Konig gave a long exhale under his breath, closing his eyes and tilting his head back slightly as he tried to will away the vitriol boiling under his skin. He felt himself slipping away to that depraved place and he had to ground himself.
You had that effect on him, making him lose control.
When Soap throws his arm around you, and you don't even seem to notice or care, lost in the story you're telling, your hands waving along with your excited tone, Konig thinks he's about to lose his mind. It feels like you've stabbed him, liebe, why are you letting this happen? Why aren't you shaking his stupid hand off your shoulder and giving him a scowl so powerful he’d never dare to do it twice?
Why are you still laughing and smiling and carrying on when Soap is touching something that belong to him?
When you finish telling a story that Konig is sure was brilliant and wonderful and perfect, Soap leans in inches from your face to whisper something to you. Konig can't read his lips, can't understand what he's whispering in your ear as he half-way embraces you.
Your eyebrows pull as you focus on his hushed voice over the commotion of the bar. Recognition floods you and a cheeky smile creeps across your face.
Konig’s nails are digging into his palms. His mind is racing and that bitter taste in his mouth turns his lips into a scowl.
He watches as you both stand and Soap finally removes his arm from you, finally. It was draped over your delicate shoulders much too long for his liking.
Where are you two headed, though? Off to the bathroom so he can seduce you while you're inibriated? Going to sneak you out of the pub while the rest of the team is distracted, just to push you up against some dingy alleywall, not able to resist another moment without knowing what it's like to kiss your lips?
Or, God help him, what if it wasn't the first time? What if you had already kissed him?
How long has this been going on, right under his nose?!
Konig’s slipping again, his thoughts running from him. Upon realizing he hasn't taken a breath this whole time he forces a few deep inhales, nostrils flared in uncontrollable rage.
This is your fault, you know.
A wave of relief floods him when you two stop at the bar, squeezing between the stools of the counter as you attempt to flag a bartender.
When the bartender notices you both, Soap’s hand finds your shoulder again, holding on for just a little too long as he relays your drink order to the bartender.
That should be him getting you a drink.
That should be him with his hand on your shoulder.
You and Soap are smiling as you chat, he can't hear what about, but Konig is hoping it’s just alcohol that’s to blame for your flushed cheeks.
The bartender returns with your drinks and yet you two linger by the counter, continuing your one-on-one conversation. What’s so great about him, huh? Why aren’t you two returning to the group?
He watched as you press the plastic cup to your lips and take a sip of your drink, eyes trained on Soap as he obnoxiously holds you in conversation. He hates that about the 141 boys. It’s easier for Konig when you’re all in a group, but it always seems like those boys all want their private moment with you.
He knows he can’t blame them, of course they want to talk to you. They can see your light just like Konig can. Liebe, you just don’t understand, they don’t have good intentions with you. They want to control you, dim you, ruin you.
It should be him ruining you.
Breathe. He has to breathe. Through gritted teeth, a snarled lip, and flared nostrils he has to breathe.
He’s suffocating on his own anger and the air in the bar is stuffy. He needs a break, a break from you but he needs to stay and make sure Soap doesn’t try to take advantage of you. Could he even blame him at this point? When you’re looking at him with those doe eyes and giggling like a naive schoolgirl at whatever shtick he’s peddling at you.
You’ve reached the level of intoxication where the alcohol is going down easy, Konig noticed. Not even a grimace as you sip your drink.
You’re shaking your head at Soap, and you give him a point paired with a cheeky expression. You both are finally heading back to the group, and Konig feels safe enough to leave his watch to slip out for some fresh air.
He needs to regroup, find his center.
This is all your fault.
You were acting so irresponsibly tonight. Letting these boys so close to you while you’re inebriated. So vulnerable. Chugging your drinks like you’re trying to make yourself stumble. Being your true, authentic self in their presence. Out in public, for anyone to see. It’s like flashing your expensive jewelry in the shady parts of town. So careless with your light, liebe.
This is why he has to watch you. To protect you. You’re too careless to do it yourself.
He’s got his eyes closed as he rests his back on the brick of the pub, having to remind himself to breathe.
You just make him so angry sometimes.
And then he hears your laugh. That genuine laugh he craved so much to hear. Craved to elicit from you. That beautiful laugh that fills his chest with warmth and makes his stomach flutter.
But it’s too close, way way too close.
He opens his eyes in a panicked jolt and he sees you, pushing open the pub door with your attention turned to the boy following you out.
Konig quickly shuffles backwards, not turning his back away from the action. He slips into the alleyway, body pressed up against the brick to shield himself.
He was always careful to keep his distance from you. He’s so recognizable, easy to pick out in a crowd. A stature you’d remember twice. It’s crucial that he stays on the opposite sides of the room of you, as far as possible.
Thankfully you two aren’t paying very good attention to your surroundings.
Oh, liebe. Always in your own little world. Unaware of the dangers that could be lurking in the shadows. Another reason why he has to watch over you. You’re not watching where you’re stepping, either, liebe. Stumbling as you step to the sidewalk.
What were you doing out here? Coerced from the safety of the herd again by one of them.
Not just any of them - Ghost.
Soap was annoying, sure, but his frat-boy shtick was an easier pill to swallow than Ghost. He was the one he hated more than any of them.
Konig knows you like him.
Simon fucking Riley.
With his perfect accent and tough exterior and mystique that attracted the women like honey attracts flies.
What did Ghost have that he didn’t?
You’re drunkingly humming the song that was playing in the bar. It doesn’t sound so over-the-top when it’s coming from you.
“Rowdy tonight, are we?” Ghost says, never straying from his usual gravely and unimpressed tone.
Konig has to force himself not to mock Ghost. Instead he hopes you can’t hear the sound of him grinding his teeth in rage.
He’s so fucking pretentious, so fucking arrogant. How dare he tease you? And for what, being lovable? What you do best?
Konig can hear you give a long drawn out hum as you think it over, “You have to be, every once in awhile. Good to let it out sometimes.” Konig hears gravel scraping under one of your shoes. “Would you prefer I be extra rowdy once a week? Or a little rowdy everyday?”
You’re so charming. Konig loves the way your mind works, always with your silly little prompts and thought experiments. You were always such a daydreamer, he could tell by the way you get lost in thought. If you totally zone out, and he watches careful enough, he can catch you making slight facial expressions at your own thoughts. He wishes he could pick your brain. Learn you from the inside out, always knowing what you’re thinking.
Ghost lets out a huff and Konig hears the unmistakable sound of a lighter being struck, and his brows pinch. He can’t help but peek around the corner and get a visual on you two.
Ghosts’ lighting himself a cigarette, the flame illuminating his face. Once it’s burning, he holds it between his first two fingers as he exhales the smoke. He passes the lighter to you - since when do you smoke, liebe?
You’re just doing it to impress him, aren’t you?
“Those are my only two options?” Ghosts asks you on an exhale. Even though you’re about to light your own, he still makes an effort to not blow smoke in your beautiful face.
“Well, what else do you suggest I do with my rowdiness? Bottle it up like you?” You say with a cheeky tone. Konig can tell your words are influenced by alcohol. You normally wouldn’t speak to your Lieutenant like this.
You knew you’d get away with it, too. With your devilish smile and teasing eyes.
Konig watches as you put the cigarette to your lips and he feels his cock twitch in his pants.
When the orange flame casts a light on your features it’s like someone took his breath from him. He’s never seen you lit like this before, liebe. The highlights and shadows cast upwards on your features was fit for a painting.
It’s gone in an instant, but you still look so beautiful in the moonlight. You pass Ghost’s lighter back to him. Konig can’t hold back his scowl at the way you brush up against his fingers. He’s hoping it’s just because you’re drunk, uncoordinated.
Ghost holds this cigarette with his mouth as he slides the lighter back into his pocket. He exhales while keeping his gaze forward, “I think the word you’re looking for is discipline, soldier.” His tone is still unchanged, but he gives you a sly glance from the corner of your eyes.
Ghost doesn’t let it show much, but Konig can see from here that even he has a soft spot for you. That’s the light you have, liebe. Able to crack the toughest of exteriors.
“Discipline? Oh, yeah. I remember that one. In the dictionary, it’s the one right next to boring, yeah?” Your whole body is turned toward him, and you’ve still got that cheeky smile on your face, your tone playful.
Could you make it anymore obvious that you want to fuck him, liebe? It’s like you’re slashing Konig with each word, it hurts so much to see you acting so irresponsibly. So intoxicated that you’re flirting with your superior.
Ghost huffs again, and Konig can tell he’s amused with you, even if it came off as annoyed. He takes another draw from his cigarette and flicks away some ash.
“Thesaurus.” He corrects.
“Gesundheit.” You say proudly.
Oh, liebe. You’re practically begging him to fuck you. Pushing your chest out and kicking your feet sweetly and flirting with him like the whore you are.
Breathe. He can’t lose his cool here. He’s trying to soothe his temper, but how can you expect him to do that when you’re acting like this? So fragrantly?
Konig’s teeth are about to crumble under the pressure and his nails are breaking the skin in his palms as he clenches his fists.
This is your fault.
You both take a hit from your cigarette, and Konig can’t believe you’ve allowed him to corrupt you like this so soon. Smoking? What a terrible habit. He’ll have to interfere if you keep it up.
You both still for awhile, basking silently in the nicotine buzz and taking in the evening. The moon was bright tonight, and the street was quiet compared to the overwhelming pub.
Konig watched you close your eyes just a little too long, and he’s wondering how far gone you are. What terrible things will happen if he were to let you out of his sight. Konig’s tired, but he hardly gets rest anymore. It’s difficult managing his career, protecting you, and stay well rested. He can’t forgo the first two, so his sleep suffers.
You’re worth it liebe. You’re all he thinks about from the moment he wakes up to the moment he falls asleep.
But did you really have to keep him out so late?
Don’t you think you’ve put his heart through the chipper enough today?
You extinguish your cigarette on the red brick behind you. You don’t litter, no. How considerate of you to take it in with you to toss. Ghosts is less thoughtful, flicking his butt to the ground and stepping it out with his boot.
You slip back into the pub, and Konig briefly considers pulling Ghost into the alley and ending your fling right now.
He resists his urges, something that’s becomes more difficult the longer he observes you, seething from his alleyway as he watches Ghost follow you in.
He didn’t even get the door for you, liebe. Konig would treat you so much better.
Konig has to let all these feelings out somewhere, and he was far from the battlefield. He opts for the metal bin in the alleyway filled to the brim with empty beer bottles and pub garbage. A firm kick paired with an aggressive grunt imprints the metal with his boot as it knocks over, it’s contents spilling out into the puddles of the alleyway with clinks and rattles.
He takes a few more deep breaths.
He was never like this before. Anxious thoughts were one thing, but this constant feeling of rage and jealousy and obsession boiling underneath his skin has only swelled the more he observes you. He’s never felt like he doesn’t have control over himself, over his actions.
This is your fault.
Konig tries to soothe himself by shutting his eyes and picturing you flirting with him instead of Ghost. That it was Konig who had snuck you away for a drunken cigarette. That it was him you were pushing your chest out for, him you were desperately flirting with.
It does ease the depravity a bit, and he casually slips back into the pub. He was still angry, don’t get him wrong, but his nerves about leaving you alone with them overcame his rage.
So he sits back down in his dingy little corner, keeping an eye on you listening to the story being told and finishing your drink.
He thinks you must be close to calling it quits judging by the way your eyes keep fluttering shut. You’re getting sleepy, holding back a yawn as you stretch your back against the booth.
A few minutes pass, and you say something to the group, probably a goodbye, as you stand and gather your items. You head for he bar and pay your tab, and who other than Simon Riley walks up to the counter as you wait for the bartender to return with change.
He leans against the bar, facing the opposite direction as he turns his head to look at you. Konig’s trying to make out what he’s saying but can’t hear over the noisy pub. You wave your hand at him dismissively.
Good, liebe, shut him down.
Ghost continues, his hands draped casually on the bar behind him. You roll your eyes a bit at him, giving a half-smile.
No. Whatever he’s offering you is bad news. Don’t let him pressure you, liebe.
You thank the bartender oh so sweetly, and turn towards the door as you stuff your change sloppily into your wallet. Ghost slinks from his propped up position and follows you.
Konig’s eyes narrow, watching as Ghost follows you closely behind.
Going to trick you back to his place and then take advantage of you?
What else could it be? Ghost must of saw his opportunity and took it. This is all because you couldn’t act responsibly, liebe.
After a moment passed, Konig follows you two out of the pub and traces your steps. He’s careful, keeping a block and a half between you. Had you not been so inebriated, he might have followed further behind and been a bit more discreet. But you don’t have an eye for detail at the moment and Ghost is too busy guiding you along and keeping an eye on your unsteady strides on the sidewalk to notice.
Konig has to force himself not to jog to catch up in an attempt to decipher the echos of your words as they reverb off the quiet streets.
When you’re back on base, Konig is able to close some distance thanks to the cover of foliage.
The base is mostly empty, the workers and soldiers either home or sleeping in their quarters. Konig’s able to crouch behind some bushes a safe distance from you, able to see flashes of your lower halves through the branches. He's careful to be still as he quiets his breathing.
He’s close enough to hear you both now.
“Thanks for walkin’ me back.” You say, words slurring a bit.
“It’s my job to look out for the team. Especially when they don't know how to hold their liquor.”
Konigs heart pinches in his chest.
It’s his job to look out for you.
“Liquor? I barely even know her!” You say with a proud smile as you fumble your key in your lock.
Ghost gives an unamused sigh.
You finally get your door open, “Night Lt.”
“Goodnight.” He stays stiffly, waiting for you to be safely inside before turning away from your door and heading off. Konig stays in his spot amongst the bushes until he's gone.
He’s glad Ghost left, didn't try to take advantage of you. The interaction still leaves a knot in his stomach. How dare Ghost take care of you, make sure you were safe. That’s what Konig was for.
Once Konig is sure the coast is clear, he sneaks around the side of the building, heading for the small window you had. He’s delightfully surprised when he can see the light pouring from inside your modest quarters.
Usually you had the blinds closed at this hour. Guess you were too drunk to care.
You were too drunk to care about a lot of things, Konig noticed, as he nested into a spot obscured by your window, just the top of his head and eyes showing from your view. You had skipped your shower and forgo most of your normal night routine, your cares dulled by the booze.
This was his favorite part of the day. When he could have you all to himself - he despises having to share you. He enjoys observing you when you think no one’s watching. When you feel safe enough to shed the facet of your persona in charge of social life, and just let yourself be. The real you, liebe.
Of course there was the intoxication - so you weren’t quite yourself - but he still enjoys watching you in your natural environment. You turn off the lights, it takes a moment for Konig’s eyes to readjust, and he watches as you stumble over to your bed, shedding your clothes down to your underwear before collapsing onto your bed.
Konig can’t help the ache that fills the give in his pants as he maps your uncovered features.
It’s like you were sending him a message. A thank you for keeping you out of trouble all day, even though you acting were so difficult.
You’re forgiven.
How can he stay mad at such an engel? When your gorgeous body is on display, just for him. His gaze is tracing the curve of your delicate hips and your perfect ass in those cute little panties. Not for anyone else, not any of those boys on the 141. No, this show was just for him. You even left the blankets off you and the blinds open for him so he could get a perfect view. You’re so considerate, liebe.
Your hands are propped under your head as you drift off and he cant help but imagine himself straddling you, cock grinding against your ass as he kisses along the dip of your back, holding those pretty little wrists down. He’s been able to restrain himself, but the last few weeks the urge is unshakable. He doesn’t know how much longer he can go without sneaking into your room, liebe. He just wanted to know what it was like to be in your space. Where you sleep and decompress and get ready for the day. He wonders how many times you’ve pleasured yourself on that modest little mattress.
His cock is at full attention now, and he can’t help but palm himself through his pants.
He needs to get close you. Close enough to take in all the precious details of your features. Close enough to hear you breathe. Close enough to feel the warmth that radiates from your skin. Close enough to figure out what your shampoo smells like.
You probably wouldn’t even mind.
His gaze flicks over briefly to the lock to your quarters. He wonders if you’re in a deep enough sleep not to stir if he were to pick it.
You’re practically inviting him in. You can’t possibly expect to tease him like this and expect him to control himself? You’re giving yourself to him.
Desperate hands pop the button of his pants, shoving his hand into his waistband in order to find some relief. He can’t stop staring at your beautiful body, liebe. He wants to wake you up with your cunt in his face, already dripping from his tongue making gentle circles around your clit. Too turned on to deny him. He wants you to helplessly come on his face, his grip digging into your plush thighs as he forces you spread and holds you steady though the convulsing of intense orgasm.
He takes a look around, making sure no one was around before pulling his cock out, his grip firm on the base as he pumps himself. He just can’t help it. Not when you’re sprawled on the bed and showing off your body for him.
He’s thinking about how your hands would cling to him, nails clawing to get him off your pulsing clit, but he would hold firm, taking advantage of your sensitively. He wants to you powerless to the pleasure, the only resistance you’d be capable of is desperate and broken pleading as he hungrily commits your taste to memory. It’s the least you could do for him, after everything he‘s done for you.
His other hand presses up against the cool wall, holding him steady as he jerks himself off.
Precum is leaking from him as he pictures you, mumbling sweet nothings and reduced to a trembling mess. You wouldn’t even have it in you fight him as he lines his cock up with your dripping cunt, pushing his tip in and savoring how tight you are as you stretch around him.
He wants to ruin you, liebe. Reduce you to a whining and quivering mess as he pounds into you.
The visual you gifted him had him so excited, he didn’t last long. He spilled come all over the concrete wall beneath your window sill, some dripping to the dirt beneath his feet. His whole body shakes at the intensity of the orgasm, involuntarily hunching forward and choking off any noises begging to escape him. He’s imaging he’s filling you up with his come, staking his claim deep inside you. Claiming his ownership.
He’s still for a moment, taking hitched breaths as he recovers from his orgasm.
Once his thoughts return, the flush on his features transitioned from the warmth of pleasure to the heat of shame, looking to you lying on your bed sleeping, then to his mess scattered outside your window as he crouches outside.
He’s out of control, he can’t help himself, liebe. He wasn’t usually like this. It was just for you - you brought it out of him. It was all your fault, you’ve reduced him to a perverted peeping tom by teasing him like this. Purposefully making him jealous, messing with his emotions, and then luring him back with your beauty. He knew what game you were playing, he was smart enough to understand the power you held over him. He still could not resist you.
You will be punished for how you’ve been treating him, liebe. The tortuous weeks you’ve put him through. He will ruin you. Dig his nails in, train you until you are right where he wants you, never able to hurt him again.
You were his, liebe. You just didn’t know it yet.
Part Two
Original Works Masterlist
1K notes ¡ View notes
anonymous-vr ¡ 8 months ago
Text
Self Discipline
Summary:
It's easy to keep your legs closed.
6.3k words
Bakugou x fem/reader
Warnings:
Smut
MDNI!
Author's Word:
My first post on here, enjoy.
-Anonymous-vr
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Your suitcase, meticulously packed with essentials for a week, stood as a silent testament to the internship you had tirelessly pursued. As summer draped its warmth over Japan, you felt both drained and invigorated by the experience. The city buzzed with life as you navigated its streets, your tenacious attitude pushing you through every challenge. After finishing your internship, you promised to visit your mother soon after. Her mama-bear nature refuses to let you relish your life without a consistent visit.
In a world where humans are equipped with powers, life-threatening events constantly take place around you. You were thankful nothing happened to you, though you could never be too sure. "Please be safe on the road home." Your mother spoke eagerly on the phone, excited to see her only child. Your reassurance did nothing to calm her nerves though, it never did. "Remember when you told me I needed to get out more? Well, your mama is hosting a get-together. It'll be in the garden. I'm in a club dedicated to mothers with only one child." You couldn't help but chuckle over the phone. Having a mother who refused to get out and meet others was a burden for you, it made leaving so much more difficult. "You can tell me more when I get home Mom.".
The three-hour drive always took a toll on your body as you began to re-enter the city halfway through. Traffic was always hectic this time of year as some traveled away and others went home in the town. You sighed a sigh of relief once you parked in front of your small childhood home. It was small but you loved it. Its eggshell exterior makes a great contrast with the brick guiding visitors inside. The flowers you'd watched your mother plant running up the gate and greeting your fingers as you pushed inside. The slightly rusty gate creaked as you pulled your suitcase behind you. It took two knocks before the front door was yanked open and you were engulfed by your mother's arms.
"You don't know how much I've missed you around here." You followed her inside before making your way to your old bedroom. "I've missed you too Mom, more than you know. Tell me more about this event you're hosting though." You unpacked your suitcase as she detailed the gathering she'd put together. "Wow Mom, you've invited twenty-nine people over? That's insane considering your introverted nature." "I know but I really wanted to listen to you and push myself out there. Now I know twenty-nine other mothers who are also dealing with some sort of separation anxiety. A mother I've grown close to has a son I'm sure you'd get along with." You turned to raise a brow at your mom.
You were successful in almost every aspect of your life, not to her. Your life was too busy for romance, and she pitied you. The story of her and your father constantly brought up to try and ignite something within you, it never worked though. Father passed away when you were still young, romance was never something that you'd seen first-hand growing up. The only depictions of love shown were on TV, and the popular sitcoms portrayed it as fairly difficult to obtain.
"Mom, you know I'm too busy to entertain the thought of having a boyfriend." Having this conversation was like beating a dead horse. "Well, his mother has described him as a very well-known and handsome man. At least be open about this, for me? I don't want you old and alone like me." You let out a soft sigh before pulling your mother in for a warm, and much-needed, hug. "I'll be open but I can't make any promises."
As the setting of the Sun painted the sky with stars, you sunk into your bed and fell asleep. Your rest wasn't fulfilling as you knew you'd need to wake up in enough time to make yourself look appropriate. The nagging thought of this mystery man also kept you pondering throughout the night.
As morning slowly approached, you sadly got out of bed and got dressed. The smell of food filled the little house as your mother prepared snacks for the guests. Pulling on a floral sundress and a pair of kitten heels, you rush out of your room just in time. Looking outside, it seemed as though guests had already arrived. A majority of the mothers had brought their children along with them. They all exuded motherly pride as they finally had the chance to show off the child they'd described over the past few months.
"This is my only child y/n." Your mother gushed as she hugged onto your arm. Chatter started as the other mothers introduced themselves and reached to shake your hand. As everyone began to mingle, you found yourself watching from the sides. As much as you told your mother to get out of her shell, you felt ashamed now as she left to speak to the other mothers. Your phone became enticing, luring you in as you drowned out the world and began checking emails. You weren't sure how much time had passed before you were interrupted by the sound of your mother's voice approaching you again.
"This is my daughter!" Looking up, you were met with an ash-blonde-haired woman. "Well, aren't you a beauty? I'd always wished for a daughter. Instead, I was given that thing over there." She chuckled as her thumb directed you to the scowling man hunched over at a table. He looked identical to his mother, his ash-blonde hair and eyes a piercing crimson color. Turning his gaze toward the three of you, you quickly looked away. "I'm sure he's great." The lie was forced through your teeth, he looks extremely intimidating. "No need to lie, I told him to dress nicely, and he comes out in jeans and a black top. Ignorant just like his father." The two women moved to sit and chat.
Your gaze couldn't help but flicker from the man across the garden. His black shirt curled around his body, displaying his muscles. His big stature exuded confidence as though he owned the place. He looked awfully familiar, like someone you'd seen in the news. Growing up in a small town, you were often isolated from the flashy aspects of city living. You knew of a few celebrities and heroes but never anything up to date. The only new-gen hero you knew about was Deku, you were a big fan. A few of his posters were plastered on your wall from your early college years.
Shaking your gaze from the man, you decided to go inside for a drink of water. The beams of the sun had finally won. As you moved inside, you could feel the eyes of the man on your back as you smiled at a few guests in your path. Once inside, peace washed over you. You were an introvert just like your mom, this newfound inner peace came after you'd graduated from college. At age twenty-two, you were more inclined to spend more time alone than with others. You sipped on a cup of water as you pulled up your phone and scrolled through a few documents you were meant to review.
The sound of the back door opening and closing caught your attention as you placed your phone on the counter. No one was meant to be inside the house, so you assumed it was your mom. "Mom, does your friend's son look familiar? I feel like I've seen him somewhere before." You spoke out loud as your gaze moved outside the window to look at the man again. You were shocked when you couldn't find him though, instead being met with the eyes of your mother as she continued to chat with the others. Face falling in confusion, you swiveled around to be met with the intimidating man. Embarrassed, your eyes widened as you stood awkwardly.
"Y'know where the bathroom is?" He questioned with a stoic look on his face. He held no shame as his demanding eyes bore into yours, expecting an answer. Technically, no one was meant to be inside the house. There was only one bathroom, it was shared by you and your mother. "I uh- It's right down the hall to the left." Your voice was an unusual octave as the older man watched you squirm. He raised an eyebrow at you, his head tilting to an angle. "So, you just let anyone walk through your house alone?" The question had caught you off guard, you'd expected him to leave once given directions. "I'm sorry but um, what do you mean?" He shook his head, obviously annoyed by your ignorance. "You don't know me and you're gonna let me wander your house. Just because you give me directions, doesn't mean I'm gonna follow them. This is why you dumb extras are always in dumb situations."
Your face dropped as you rushed from your spot in the kitchen. His booming voice further intimidates you as you guide him through the house and to the bathroom. His presence was large and strong as he walked behind you. He gave you a lackluster "Thanks" before shutting the door behind him.
Bakugou unzipped his pants and did his business as he looked around your bathroom. The sink was crowded with perfumes, makeup, dental care, and hair items. The soft pink shower curtain was slightly opened, giving him a view into your clean shower. This was definitely a woman's house. It was definitely messier than his bathroom though. He always prioritized having a clean space as it helped him think better. Being the number two hero, he couldn't allow his space to reflect his busy schedule.
Finishing his business, he washed his hands while looking in the mirror. Today was his first day off in two weeks and his mother had forced him to spend it at this get-together. He was upset but understood the importance of keeping a tight-knit relationship with his parents. "There's a girl I want you to meet at this get-together. She's a sweet thing, based on what her mother's said. I spoke positively about you so try your best to uphold what I've said." His mother's words annoyed him, she constantly meddled in his love life as she wanted grandkids sooner than later. Being a busy hero though, he knew he had little to no time for a relationship. He entertained his mother and agreed to attend, promising to be on his best behavior.
As he left the bedroom, he realized you were no longer in front of the door. "Dumb ass, just let strangers wander her house alone." He grumbled before glancing at the bedroom across the hall. He knew it had to be yours. Floral wallpaper, a soft pink rug, and a white bed standing in his vision. His curiosity getting the best of him, he stepped into your room and looked around. A scowl formed on his face at the sight of Deku, his face plastered on a poster you'd neatly taped on your wall. Despite the ridiculous number of knick-knacks, your room was fairly clean.
You'd gone to the kitchen once the bathroom door shut, eagerly grabbing your cup of water to calm yourself. The man seemed even more familiar after speaking to him, his temperamental energy scratching your brain. After texting an old friend and chugging down your water, you walked back down the hallway to find the man. Reaching the bathroom, your brows furrowed at the emptiness. "Um...excuse me?" You called out, hoping for a reply. Maybe he'd found his way back outside. The thought was brushed away though when his voice replied from your bedroom. Heart falling to your ass, you turned around and rushed to your room.
The tall man looked out of place in your childhood room. "This um...this isn't the way back outside." Your reply was stupid, and you mentally cursed yourself for it. "Yeah, I figured. What's with the poster?" His finger pointed to the old poster on your wall. "Oh, it's old, I put that up during my sophomore year of college." You weren't sure why, but you could feel irritation shimmer off his body. "Do you...not like Deku?" A low grumble left his lips as his brows furrowed. "D'you not know who I am or something?" His head turned so his eyes could look at you. You were pathetic, standing timidly in your own room. Your form was much smaller than his, the kitten heels doing little to boost your height.
"I'm sorry." Was all you could get out as the man studied you. His presence made you feel foreign in your own house. Your answer made him turn to fully face you. "You're serious, you don't know who I am?" Words failing, you shook your head no. It pissed him off, Deku's face plastered on your wall, and you didn't know who Bakugou was. It didn't surprise him though considering how small your town was. "You livin' under a fuckin rock or what?" Poison was laced in his words as he stepped closer to you, his cologne slowly sweeping from his body up your nostrils. Your eyes widened as he stalked closer to you, seeming to not care about personal space. "I-should I know who you are?" "Damn right, you should, you're standing in front of the number two hero." With that, everything fell into place. No wonder he seemed so familiar. The hero Dynamight was standing in your room.
"There we go, that little brain finally working huh?" you stumbled over your words as you apologized profusely, something he seemed to enjoy as his signature smirk spread across his face. "So what, Dynamight was never good enough to plaster on your walls?" Your jumbled words began falling again as you tried to explain your reasoning. "This is so embarrassing" You mumbled as your blushing face fell into your hands. You never expected this turn of events, unprepared for his persistent personality. He chuckled as he sat down on your bed. You continued to stand, too nervous to sit next to the towering hero. "So, what's it like being a hero?" you questioned, fiddling with your fingers nervously. He caught onto your nervous habits though, scoffing as you shrunk under his gaze. "Relax, I'm not gonna blow your head off or anything." Your arms immediately fell to your sides as you stood awkwardly. "It's hard work, a lot of hard work. I love my job though." His answer didn't give much detail, but you still appreciated it.
"What exactly... brings you to this part of town? With how busy you must be, I can't help but wonder how you have the time to come to such an underwhelming get-together." "My mom wanted me to come so I came. Something about wanting to introduce me to some woman's daughter." Your face flushed as you began to avoid his eye contact. Picking up on your body language, mentally cursed his mom for putting him in this predicament. "I'm assuming that daughter is you." Your silence was enough of an answer for him. "I promise I wasn't in on this; I was told the same thing you were. Besides, I'm not interested in finding a relationship since I'm too busy with work. I've gone twenty-two years without one so I'm sure I'll survive." Your words sprinted from your mouth as you tried to cut through the awkward tension.
Bakugou scoffed at your jumbled words. "Were you a sheltered little brat or what? You've never been in a relationship before?" He was surprised a girl like you had never been in a relationship before. Your pretty hair was gathered in a low bun, a few pieces framing your innocent face. He watched as you nervously pulled your glossy bottom lip between your teeth. "I never saw the point of it." Your reply was a lame excuse, it was true though. "You ever try having sex?" His question was extremely inappropriate and blunt. The blood rose to your face as your eyes averted away from his. "Of course not if I've never been in a relationship." He let out a deep chuckle, shifting slightly on your bed. You were an innocent little thing. Living in the city, he was used to bold and experienced women who threw themselves at him. You were the complete opposite though, avoiding his gaze and presenting yourself as a modest little thing.
"You never heard of a hook-up?" His question made you look stupid as he stared at you confused. "I-I-I yeah, I mean. I'd never do that." He cut you off with another scoff. "What, you too good for that too?" "That's not what I'm saying I just-" Your fingers began twiddling together again as you spoke, nerves shooting through your body. "I just don't participate in those types of activities." "Come here." His hand patted the bed, signaling the spot next to him. Hesitating, you force your body to move. The bed creaked underneath the weight of you and the pro hero. His eyes glazed over your face and body as you stared straight ahead. His heat radiated off of him and it made you shift. Bakugou was a very handsome man, his blonde locs sitting disheveled on his head. His hair color complimented the intensity of his red eyes. All elements of him accessorizing the Godly build he had beneath his clothes. He was a man to be admired, you refused to give in though.
"So, you just walk around looking all dolled up to reject every man showing interest." Turning to face him, you took in the change of his demeanor. "I mean yeah, nicely of course." His gaze stayed on you, watching as your body squirmed beneath his eyes. "I don't know how you live like that, especially considering how good it feels." "It's honestly not that hard to keep your legs closed." Your reply was snobbish as if you were above the idea of having sex. "Is it easy or have you just not met a man that makes your hands sweat." "No, I've met my handful of handsome men. I just choose not to partake. I personally have great self-discipline."
Bakugou took your words as a challenge. While you thought it made you look like a dignified and "respectable" woman, Bakugou saw you as a snobby, arrogant, cocky prick. The need to show you that you were no better than those who'd partaken in others grew in his chest as he watched you stick your nose in the air. "What a snotty little bitch you are." He spat the words out, emphasizing the title as you whipped your head to look at him. "What did you just call me?" You didn't care if he was a pro hero or not, you didn't tolerate that kind of name-calling. "You heard me, walking around here like you're better than everyone else. You're just as human as your peers, we've all got desires. I'll be damned if I sit here and let you lie to my face like I'm some dunce. Either you're lying or you really haven't found the right extra to pull those panties to the side and fuck you."
His words were nasty beyond your tolerance. You couldn't help the blood that rushed up your chest, no one had spoken to you like that before. Oddly enough, you couldn't help but squeeze your thighs together. The mental battle in your head kept you dazed as you couldn't understand why your body reacted to his words. "Fuckin virgins runnin' around thinking they're better than everyone else until they're dicked down." Your movements didn't go unnoticed by the pro, his eyes easily picked up on the way your thighs rubbed together beneath your sun dress. He let out a low chuckle at this. "See, all it took was a couple of words to get you hot and bothered." Your mouth opened and closed in defense as you looked for words. "I'm not sure what you're talking about."
He was tired of your act, ready to humble you back where you belong. His sharp canines showed, and his big hand reached out and rested on your thigh. Blood pooled in the area where his hand sat, you weren't used to being touched by others. His eyes watched your reaction as you did nothing to push his touch away, instead keeping your shocked eyes on his. "What's wrong? Searching for that self-discipline? I've got you red in the face and I haven't even touched you yet." The 'yet' at the end of his sentence had your mind spinning. "Of course you'd let me touch you though, the dumb men in this town could never meet your expectations, right?" His hand began to move as he shifted his body to face yours. "Answer me." He demanded, hand moving to your waist. "N-No that's not it at all." His hand slightly squeezed your thigh causing a soft yelp to fall from your lips. "Give me the right answer." You sighed as his hand moved up to gently cup one of your breasts. You'd never felt a sensation like it, a new feeling of pleasure sending waves down to your core. Your eyes darted down to his hand as he gently messaged your skin. "They could never meet my standards." The reply came out breathy as your body began to crave his.
"Look at you, melting in my touch." As he watched you, his already inflated ego filled the room. Little Miss Untouchable was writhing under the little pleasure he was giving her. "Look at that, I know it feels good. It feels good, doesn't it?" He wanted to break you down and ruin the image you'd created of yourself in your head. Your hot face turned away as you bit down on your bottom lip. "I know you want me to keep going so you'd better open that mouth and answer me." "Yes." The word was all you'd give him as your back arched further into his touch. His hand left your body before you felt yourself be lifted into his lap. Your heart began to beat vigorously as you straddled his hips with your own. "We can't! The guests and my mom and your mom-" "But you want to." The shit-eating grin on his face let you know he had you right where he wanted you. "I need to hear you say it or I can't go further." You sat quietly for a second, weighing your options. On one hand, you weren't sure you wanted to risk your ego for this. On the other, the feeling of his hips between yours was driving you insane.
After weighing your options for a few seconds, you let out a shaky breath. "Just...be quick." "I don't rush shit." Before you could process his words, his lips were on your neck. The sensation was new, nothing like what you'd felt before. His lips were plush and warm as he tickled up your neck. The feeling of his hair brushing your jaw kept you grounded as you instantly melted in his touch. You were fully aware of his hands that rested at your thighs, slowly pushing your bunched dress up your legs. The sound of his lips moving against your skin made you feel dirty like you were committing the greatest act against yourself. Though you felt dirtier because it felt so good.
"Take this dress off." His voice was demanding as he moved back, waiting for you to follow orders. Your fingers reached down and hesitantly tugged the dress from your body. The sight of your pretty pink panty and bra set had Bakugou drooling. "Sure you're a virgin? Or you walk around with these pretty panties on for nothing?" The question was rhetorical, his lips falling against your collarbone. As he riled you up, you could feel an uncomfortable sensation growing between your legs. You could smell yourself through your panties. Embarrassed, you tried to close your thighs around him to no avail. His hands smoothed up your sides and played with your bra clasp before easily unclipping it. A gasp left your lips as you hugged your bra to your chest. His teeth pinched down on the soft skin of your neck as a warning. Loosening your grip, you allowed him to roughly tear the bra from your skin.
You were completely flustered, never have had anyone see you this bare before. "Look at that, high and mighty twenty minutes ago, and bare for me to see now." Before you could get a word out, he had you flipped beneath him on your childhood bed. Your legs lay beside his thighs as he stared down at you hungrily. "Oh gosh," The words flew out your mouth before you could stop them. Bakugou took this as his cue to continue as his lips quickly flew down to suck on your nipple. His other hand worked at the neglected boob as you watched with lustful eyes. The feeling was nothing short of euphoric, sensations traveling down to your drooling virgin pussy. Your head eventually rested on your pillow, allowing you to indulge in the pleasure.
"You like gettin' your titties sucked pretty girl?" His tone was condescending, dripping with arrogance as he teased you. You were too dazed from the simple touch to argue though, letting out an approving hum. His teeth bit down on your nipple enough to make you squeak. "Speak" "Y-yes, I like getting my titties sucked Dynamight." He chuckled at your submission. "Good bitch." You mewled at the name. Him pairing the derogatory name with praise making your back arch your chest into his face. "Dirty virgin, you like getting called a bitch huh?" His hand slowly began traveling down to the waistband of your panties. "Come on y/n, no way you're that worn out already?" His thick fingers moved to your inner thigh, thumb rubbing circles over your skin. He was teasing you, trying to get you to the point of desperation. Oh, what he'd give to hear you beg for his dick. You stayed quiet, concentrating on the way his fingers slowly moved to the damp area on your panties. You bit your lip from embarrassment. "You're sopping, this the self-discipline you were talking about?" You couldn't get an answer out as his fingers finally rubbed softly over your slit. Your pussy fluttered at the feeling, begging for more as your mouth dropped slightly open. He took this as an opportunity to connect lips, tongue pushing inside your mouth as his fingers began rubbing firmly. It was like electricity was sent through your body and straight to your core. You'd never felt anything like it. His fingers worked expertly, riling you up as his mouth worked against yours. The corners of his lips pulled up into a smirk as soft sounds began to escape your lips. He knew he had you.
"How much do you like these panties?" His question barely registered in your head. You let out a confused hum before the sound of a slight explosion and ripped fabric filled your ears. The cold air from your room finally hit your wet and weepy pussy. His fingers immediately found solitude within your folds, brushing up and down before toying around your clit. "Oh my-Dynamight that-" "It's Katsuki." He grunted out as his eyes explored your face. You were so sensitive, trying to grasp the feelings in your body. His sweet but musky scent helped overstimulate you as you relished in his touch. "Cocky little brat thought she was too good for this." His words were mumbled into your lips as his fingers toyed with your excited core.
Soft breaths hummed from your throat as your legs continuously parted for him. Without warning, he plunged his fingers into your sopping sex. "Kats-oh my gosh." The words came out with a gasp as your hands gripped the sheets. "Just preppin you for what's to come." His eyes watched as you swallowed his finger easily. "Fuck, you're so tight. Not sure how I'll fit in here." His words flew over your head as you easily began to see stars. A feeling rose in the pit of your stomach, and you weren't sure how to react. "Wait wait stop something's coming out." The words rushed out your mouth in panic, but your body remained slack as he added a second finger. "Just relax." Was all he muttered as he watched you fall apart from his two fingers. Your face scrunched as your back arched off your bed. Everything felt lighter as you dipped in and out of consciousness. Bakugou's dick got even harder than it already was, watching as you twitched beneath him.
Once your sex stopped gripping him so tightly, he removed his fingers from your core. Eyes lazily hanging open, your heart skipped a beat as he brought his fingers to his mouth. "Mmm, you taste good." Popping his fingers out of his mouth, he pushed them in front of you. You sat confused at first but shyly took his fingers into your mouth. The taste of your arousal mixed with his spit was so dirty, but you couldn't help the soft moan that vibrated your chest. "Don't you?" He asked matter-of-factly as you sucked the remainder of his fingers clean. Ripping his fingers from your mouth, he wasted no time in ripping his top off. Your desperation for him grew as you took in his sculpted figure. His ego rose through the roof as he felt your needy eyes on him. He ignored you though as he continued to take off his pants and boxers. Your mouth fell open at what was previously hidden.
Beneath his six-pack sat a pretty dick. Blonde hair decorated the top area, emphasizing his sharp v-line. "I promise you'll never see a dick like this again. You'll never feel a dick like this again either pretty girl." Grabbing your legs, he yanked you to the bottom of the bed before positioning both of them on his shoulders. "So desperate to suck me in?" He watched your hole clench around nothing, eager to be filled. Your face was hot as you watched the hero position himself between your legs. You were fully bare for him and, shockingly, it turned you on. "Fuck you're so wet." His words were mainly directed at himself as his leaking head began to smear against your folds. The soft hums leaving your lips stirred him further as your hands fidgeted to find something worth gripping. Your mouth stretched wide as your seeping hole did the same, his hot dick began to push slowly inside of you. "Ow I- Gosh Katsuki you're big." The moans began to fill your room as you tried your best to swallow him hole. "You can take it." The sharp pain was slowly overcome by the feeling of intense pleasure. Your tits bounced softly as his balls finally reached your ass. "Squeezin' me so hard, relax." His demanding words did nothing to loosen your grip, his fingers did though. You almost reached your peak instantly when his hand came down to play with your clit again. Once that little hole of yours finally lost a bit of grip, he began slowly but deeply fucking into you. The sensation was even greater than when you were sucking in his fingers. His hands gripped your hips as he bent down and captured your lips in his. The lewd sound of skin on skin filled the room as you allowed yourself to be swallowed up by his presence. When his lips finally left yours, your hand drifted down to your stomach. "I can feel you." His self-restraint snapped at that moment as his hips pulled fully back before snapping into yours. A loud cry left your lips before being muffled by his hand. "You forgot to close your door Miss Self Discipline." He grunted through gritted teeth. The feeling of his pounding into you was driving you off the edge, and quickly. Bakugou could tell you were reaching your high as your muffled cries began falling from your lips consistently. "Let's test that self-discipline." He mumbled before pulling out fully.
You were on the brig of finishing when he pulled out, a loud whine leaving your lips. "Not so hard to keep your legs closed? I guess it shouldn't be too hard to keep yourself from cumming on my dick." He waited a couple seconds for you to come down before shoving back into you. Your mouth dropped open beneath his hand, tongue absentmindedly darting out to wet his palm. His hips snapped to yours with vigor as you lay there and take it. Removing his hand from your mouth, it swiftly gripped your neck, His arm was situated between your breasts as you lazily looked up at him. "Shit y/n." Your name leaving his in a praise of pleasure had your back arching. "Look at you, needy just like the rest of us. It feels good, doesn't it?" His condescending tone made it obvious that he just wanted his ego stroked. You'd happily do that though with him balls deep in your cunt. "Feels so good Katsuki, so good." You sighed, listening to the nasty sounds filling up the room. "I know it does, needy bitch" His hips began rocking into yours faster and harder, and the feeling of him hitting a certain spot inside of you had tears pooling in your eyes.
"You're a snobby little slut, acting like you're better than the rest of us. Aren't you?" He fucked the ego right out of you as you lazily opened your mouth to reply. "Yes." A slap was placed on your thigh. "Give me the right answer." "F-F-Fuck Katsuki. Yes, I'm a snobby little slut." A sinister grin fell on his lips as he began rocking harder into you. Mewls left your mouth before they were swallowed by his lips. You were teetering on edge, and he knew this. His hand fell between your legs again and began toying with your clit. Your bed shook from the weight. Hands moving all over you, his breathing became ragged as soft moans fell from his lips to harmonize with your own. Before you knew it, he had you seeing stars for a second time. You let out a loud moan into his mouth as your body vibrated and twitched under his touch. He didn't let up though, continuing his fast and hard thrusts as he chased his own high. Soon enough, the feeling of something warm spilling inside of you caught your attention. Too fucked out to care though, you swallowed his own moans of ecstasy before feeling him pull out.
Your body was shocked and still, as your eyes opened only slightly. Between your lashes, you could see him get dressed as he read a message from his phone. "Hero duty calls." He spoke to you as he leaned down and placed a hungry kiss on your lips. "You're fucked out, might wanna pull yourself together though. Looks like your mom's event is ending soon." Before leaving, he pulled his phone out and took a photo of your sprawled-out and exhausted body. You could hear him chuckle as he walked to the door and left.
The week went by fast, too fast, you found yourself kissing your mother bye before driving back to your apartment. The memories from your mom's event constantly invaded your mind whenever you were left alone. He'd triggered something inside of you, ruining your self-image. Late at night, you found yourself touching your cunt, trying to mimic the way he fingered you previously. It was never enough though. You started out with the best and now anything less wasn't good enough.
Pulling your suitcase into your apartment, your phone let out a ding. Standing in the doorway, you quickly opened the message from the unknown number and jumped inside. You'd hoped your neighbors didn't see anything on your phone as an image of your fucked out body splayed across your screen. Your cunt glistened from the light as your hands gripped your tits. Your face was flushed as hairs stuck to your cheeks and forehead. Below the image left a text that had you blushing.
Little Miss "It's easy to keep your legs closed"
Little Miss Self Discipline.
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edenesth ¡ 1 year ago
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The Royal Librarian
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Pairing: tutor!Yeosang x librarian!reader
Word Count: 1.1k
'Crazy Form' Comeback Special Series | Hongjoong | Seonghwa | Yunho | Yeosang | San | Mingi | Wooyoung | Jongho |
ATEEZ Masterlist
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"Yeosang, if you don't confess your feelings to the librarian soon, I swear I'll do it for you."
The royal tutor's eyes widened at the princess' words. Resisting the urge to slap a hand over her mouth, he hissed, "Your highness! You will do no such thing, that's highly inappropriate." Despite his disapproval, she merely smirked, enjoying the panic in his eyes as you walked past the two in the palace library, checking the newly arrived books.
Arms folded, she locked eyes with the tutor mischievously, retorting, "You can't tell me what to do; I'm the princess." Yeosang sighed deeply, questioning why he was stuck tutoring this unruly student instead of her disciplined elder brother.
"Why won't you just leave me be? I promised I'd talk to her soon," He pleaded. She scoffed, "You've said that before, and I don't see any progress. This is your last chance, or I'll take matters into my own hands."
With a defeated sigh, he smacked his palm against his forehead, muttering a curse. The princess grinned, satisfied, and resumed her studies with a quill in hand, "I'm only doing this for you because you're my favourite teacher."
Yeosang gave her an unamused stare, "You do realise I'm your only teacher."
She smiled sarcastically, "Exactly, so you have no choice but to do as I say."
As their lesson concluded for the day, the princess shot a threatening squint at her tutor, her fingers subtly gesturing, 'I'm watching you,' before she gracefully exited the library.
Defeated, Yeosang nodded and bowed lightly as he watched her leave, a sense of resignation settling over him. If he wished for a peaceful existence, compliance seemed to be his only option. His heart raced as he turned his attention to you, who were diligently ticking away on your checklist, ensuring the library remained well-organised, as you always do.
He found himself captivated by the sight of you working from a distance; in his eyes, you were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. From the very first encounter, he sensed it was love at first sight. As he got to know you better, he discovered that your allure extended beyond physical beauty.
Your kindness, knowledge, and passion for your work set you apart. It might sound clichĂŠ, but to him, you were incomparable to anyone else. While the princess' lessons could be torturous at times, your presence never failed to brighten his day.
He took a deep breath and dared himself to approach you. Nervously, his hands instinctively moved to straighten his hair and adjust his clothes. Despite having spoken to you before, you always made him stumble over his words like a bumbling fool.
Upon noticing the handsome tutor's presence, you greeted him with a warm smile, setting down your work documents, "Hey Yeosang, how was the lesson today? I hope her highness wasn't too difficult; she's been in a good mood lately. Do you think it has anything to do with the painter she's been seeing in town?"
He chuckled shyly, "It was alright, thanks for asking. I've heard about her new friend; she won't shut up about him. Unfortunately, that doesn't change the way she torments me."
Laughing, you shook your head, "You poor thing. What will it take for her to let you live, hm?"
Yeosang hesitated, unsure whether to be honest. He did know what it would take for her to go easy on him. This could be the perfect time to broach the topic, but he searched his brain for a way to smoothly transition the conversation.
Scratching his head sheepishly, he said, "Yeah, trust me, I always ask myself why I'm stuck with her. It would've been great if only I got the crown prince."
You nodded with a knowing smile, "I know what you mean; the prince is certainly very mature compared to his sister. It's reassuring to know the future of our kingdom is in good hands."
Drawing closer, he leaned against your work desk, attempting to appear cool, unaware of how awkward he looked. You giggled into your fist, finding him adorable. His shyness had always endeared him to you; the tutor was unlike any other guy you'd ever met.
If only he knew how special he was... to you.
"Speaking of which, the sudden news of the prince's engagement was quite a surprise, wasn't it?" He tried to steady his heart as he began his mission.
You brightened immediately, "Oh, it sure was! What a joyous occasion it is. We could use more positive news like this around Wonderland, especially with the ongoing tensions with Utopia."
Enthusiastically agreeing, he said, "We sure do! Have you also heard about the duke and the mapmaker's recent engagements?"
You nodded excitedly, sighing wistfully, "I have. It must be the season of love. Makes me wonder if my turn will ever come."
Here's my chance!
Biting his lip, he prepared for the pivotal moment, "Well, perhaps it will come sooner than expected," Your breath hitched at the direction he was taking, "Perhaps Wonderland could use another engagement soon..."
Your heart pounded as he circled around your desk to approach you, "Yeosang... what are you—" He cleared his throat and whispered your name, "I've been in love with you from the moment we first met. Will you allow me to court you?"
While you were convinced you must have been dreaming, he persistently proved you wrong by dedicating all his efforts to courting you over the next few months. The two of you became the centre of attention among the palace staff. Although he had initially hoped the princess would let him breathe, she had shifted her attention to urging him to propose.
Once he was certain that your feelings matched his own, he needed no further pushing from his student. True to his word, he kept his promise, and before you could fully grasp it, you found yourself strolling around the library with a beautiful ring adorning your finger.
"Wow, what a gorgeous ring you're wearing," Your head snapped up to find none other than your fiancĂŠ teasing you, "I know, I'm getting married soon." You responded smugly. His confident grin left you amused, marvelling at the transformation from the timid royal tutor you first met.
Gone was the once shy Kang Yeosang.
You gasped when he gently pushed you against a bookshelf, his hand shielding the back of your head as he leaned in, "Care to share who the lucky guy is?"
Slapping a hand on his chest, you attempted to push him away, "Not here, Yeo—"
But he cut you off, "Tell me."
You relented with a sigh, "It's you."
His smile widened, "That's right, my love." Any resistance melted away the moment he pressed his lips firmly against yours.
Just as he had predicted, Wonderland witnessed another engagement, and this time, it was yours. It was an unforgettable union, etched into the minds of all, thanks in no small part to the princess who claimed all credit. She proudly reminded everyone that her tutor was, at last, marrying his dream girl—the royal librarian.
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In case you haven't already noticed, all the parts of this series are sorta interconnected since it's in the same universe. This one also teases the next member's part. Have fun guessing who it is, teehee.
Tag list: @aurasblue @marievllr-abg @itsvxlentine @minghaoslatina @huachengsbestie01 @evidive
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All Rights Reserved Š edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.
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museofzia ¡ 8 days ago
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✶ no, shifting is not as easy as breathing.
𖥔𓆪 . ⁺ but it doesn't have to be hard. ࣪ ˖ ∔݃ ✶ @ self discovery and love in shifting . ۫
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shifting takes self discovery and self trust, as well as more belief in yourself. you will not achieve your goals with no self discipline. self discipline should be individualized from self hatred, because a lot of shifters i have met do not trust themselves enough to believe that they can shift, even if they can. mindset matters more than affirmation. you can tell yourself blankly that you will shift every night, but if you wake up in your cr and see that/yourself as a failure, you do not trust yourself, and your subconscious knows that shifting is real-- just believes it is out of your reach. people are entitled to their own ideologies and values, but treating shifting as a challenge and masquerading around in your own insecurity and blind self-hatred will do nothing but restrict you from all of your opportunities.
individualization ׅ  ೀ
i do see reality shifting as something that anyone can do, but a lot of shifters believe that anyone can do it.. just not them. the day that you shift cannot be marked in a calendar, but that doesn't necessarily mean it'll be years or decades until you find the day that you end up shifting. it just means you must be hard at work and be diligent and consistent, daily. self-discipline is always beneficial, even if it gets difficult.
the difference between self discipline and self hatred is when you discipline yourself, you restrict yourself from all things that hold you back because you deserve to reach your goals and will work towards them. however, self hatred is nothing but you bringing yourself and your goals down, and it is an endless cycle of consistently pushing your own goals and efforts away just because you do not value yourself enough to give yourself the love and hard work that needs to be put into the journey you are embarking on.
this afflicts with your entire process, and will lead to self destruction, and another endless cycle of "why can't i shift?"
"why can't i shift" is the EPITOME of the lowest level of self value. you can shift, you're just focusing on the fact that you haven't yet. you must find what is holding you back and work towards it. your desired reality will not drag you in. you must find your way there, yourself. that is self discovery :)
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ᡣ 𓈒⋅ ⩊ ⋅𓈒ྀིა love, zia
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wellnesswithkuhtrees ¡ 6 days ago
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“Research has shown that fear-based discipline actually fosters the behaviors that parents are trying to eliminate. Such strategies teach children to be more resistant to parental authority and may alter their brain chemistry for life.” - Dr. Becky A. Bailey PhD in Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline.
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pigeonpeach ¡ 1 year ago
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Arlecchino’s Husbandry
Cw: Fem reader, implied nsfw, manipulation, motherhood. Lesbians.
Summary: You were hired to take care of the younger orphans but ended up becoming a mother-figure to them and also winning the heart of their father figure
Edit: i did this without proofread so sorry for any mistakes
To say childcare is easy is a lie. Even in the House of Hearth where their children are disciplined to become the perfect soldiers and agents are they still difficult at times. You were hired as a caretaker. Meant only to help with the domestic side of things, cleaning, laundry, bathing, and emotional stuff. The last part wasn’t in your job description but something you took upon yourself. You may not be a mother yourself, but maternal instincts were triggered when you saw the two twins added into the orphanage. Lynette and Lyney, the youngest currently were such adorable and loving children. It broke your heart to think how they must’ve ended up here. And Lynette especially, her avoidance and clear uncomfortable behaviors around older males painted a unpleasant picture that tugged at your heart strings. All the kids here had tragic stories to tell, but many had stopped crying for their mothers or simply stopped crying at all. You knew you couldn’t spoil them so you decided to take small steps. You read them bedtime stories first. You explained it to your colleagues as helping them learn to read early on so they wouldnt get the wrong idea. You picked pleasant stories. The children were a bit confused at first but they grew to love it. And overtime, you. You became a source of protection in their eyes. If a kid felt bullied by others they ran to you because you would hold them sweetly and whisper assurances. You were still good at disciplining them yes, but you werent as harsh as the others they’d known.
Lynette especially took fondness to you. You didn’t force her to hug or any physical affection, you offered her sweets as rewards and to help her feel more calm. She took a liking to you clearly, as in her free time she and her brother would follow you around asking if you needed help. It became routine that tje children themselves would help your chores when they had free time. They prepared the clotheslines and washed their dishes,they wanted to make your job easy so they’d stay. You were quite proud of this, tje kids clearly adored you. Although you were worried what the Knave would assume or think if she saw how soft you were to them.
But You didn’t know that when she did catch sight of her that her gaze softened. Arlecchino had never craved for love or affection in years, but seeing you sat on a rocking chair with her children gathered around made her infatuated with you. You had such a soft presence, one that could melt ice cold hearts and dry tears. Your softness actually helped the children be more loyal unbeknownst to you. They wanted to make you proud and protect the home you fostered. Her affections however were noticed by the kids. Especially when she heard one referring to you as “mother”. If she was their father and you their mother, then you would be hers wouldn’t you? That idea wasn’t unpleasant but rather addictive. So she decided to become more acquainted with you. She praised you for your efforts and even offered assistance.
For the children they became even more attached, you bought a more fatherly side to their father. They noticed she became less agitated or more calm around you. So they wanted you stay, they wanted you to marry her actually so you could legally be their mother as well. With Arlecchino’s guidance they told flattering tales of their father, how much she seemed to like you. How perfectly you two would be.
Apart of you was hesitant. Arlecchino is a harbinger afterall. And you are only a low lying underling who has no combat skills whatsoever. But the way she raises your palm to her lips to greet you, the way she calls you into her office very often to just spend time with you, how she buys you your favorite teas or coffees, your favorite foods or treats, its started to make you flustered. She’s grown more bold the less resistance you show, she sometimes plays with your hair making you blush, sometimes her nails trace gently over your skin. But her eyes, although unhuman, they hold such devotion and adoration that it’s addictive. How can one not fall in love when they look at you with such a look?
So you accepted her proposal, to be her wife. To be the mother of her many children. Something celebrated within the house of Hearth. Your job did change, you had more authority as a manager of sorts rather than a domestic servant. You still spent time with the kids however. You still let them sit in your lap or nap on you. But now when Alrecchino comes back from missions or meetings she immediately heads to you to greet you. Her devotion hasn’t stopped or changed. She holds you close and presses her head to your neck as she inhales your scent. Leaving a kiss on your collar and a shiver down your spine. Her hands trace your body just to feel your soft unmarked skin. And when she gives a certain look you know you’ll struggle to get out of bed the next day. Alrecchino is a devoted woman after all. She may not be the best father ever but she is certainly a good and devoted lover.
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a-babe-without-a-name ¡ 27 days ago
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Sit Next To Me
Chapter 3: That’s Actually Very Unreasonable.
You had created two rules for yourself.
Rule One: You could do whatever you wanted. Get the degree you want, party when you want, cancel plans when you want, love who you want. Whatever you really wanted to do, you were going to do, anxiety and guilt free.
Rule Two: You could do whatever you wanted, except for have relationships with classmates. No sex, no dating. If they were on the same course roster as you, they were off limits.
Easy enough, right?
...Right?
Viktor x Female!Reader - 18+
A.N. Yay! Ch 3 is finally done! I pay Rugby and practice started up this week, which is a big reason this wasn't done a little bit sooner. But thank you to everyone for bearing with me and thank you SO MUCH for the support. I've received so many kind comments and messages, I'm so happy that I decided to actually finish and post this instead of letting it it in my google drive. Chapter 4 is coming, I'm not gonna promise when, but its on the way.
At the request of at least one person, I'm going to start a tag list in the replies of each chapter, lmk if you want to be added to that!
ALSO. Someone sent in a request and I am very excited about this. I wasn't planning on asking for requests, but I think it would be good for me to use those as a brain break from the main long form story. So if anyone is interested, feel free to send one shot or head canon requests my way! NSFW or SFW is fine! If you have questions, send an ask :) Anyways, I'll shut up now. Enjoy <3
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Read on AO3
Waking up on Saturday was…difficult, to say the least.  After spending the summer mostly sober, save for the occasional drink with your dad or joint by yourself, your body was not prepared for the previous night's substance intake. You felt grimy when you came to in your bed. Your skin sticky from sweat, your mouth dryer than all hell, and your brain felt like it had been shaken in a jar. Laying there, face in your pillow, the pros and cons of climbing out of bed tumbled around your head.
You decided that if it was before noon, you’d allow yourself a few more hours of sleep, otherwise you had to get up. Blindly you stuck a hand onto the counter at the head of your bed, knocking things left out from last night around until you found your phone. The bright screen made your temple pulse when you clicked it on.
12:01.
You dropped your head and groaned into the pillow. A deal was a deal, though, even with yourself. You gave yourself grace as you sat up in bed, looking around your tiny double dorm room. Bright light shone around the edge of the blinds, making you squint. Clothes were still scattered around your side, your hightops dropped haphazardly on the floor, not far from your shorts. You had barely managed to piss, brush your teeth, and put on clean underwear before knocking out last night. You could still feel what little makeup you had on last night smeared around your eyes. All of your pre-made plans to hydrate and clean up before going to bed were abandoned as soon as you set foot into your room. 
Lest on the other hand, looked like a princess in her bed. Washed hair in two braids, fresh pjs on, and her trusty sleep mask covering her eyes. She even layed like a princess, flat on her back with her hands folded on her stomach. You envied her discipline for hygiene even when drunk. 
You slid out of bed. Bracing yourself on the frame with a groan when your stomach flipped. Lest didn’t even flinch, she slept both like a princess and a log. You left on the clothes you slept in, wrapped a towel around your waist, and gathered your shower bag. First order of business was to clean up, because even one more minute of feeling like you were covered in a film of alcohol and smoke and you were gonna peel your skin off. 
The shared hallway was aggressively bright, but fortunately empty. You were sure you couldn’t handle an awkward ‘on the way to the shower’ run in with a hallmate right now. You’d probably throw up on the carpet. Luckily on a well weathered first Saturday of the semester, the hall was virtually abandoned. Which also meant that the only single user bathroom on your side of the building was free.
You leaned heavily against the closed door, eyes screwed shut as you fought back the wave of nausea that came with your short walk. With your eyes closed you found the automatic light switch, pushing the button to shut the lights down. The frosted window let in just enough light to see without burning your eyes out. You hung up your things and started the shower, knowing it would take a while for it to warm up. 
You took that time to brush your teeth, sick of the grit that lined your mouth. When you saw yourself in the mirror you couldn't help but to cringe. You were a wreck. The makeup around your eyes was worse than you imagined, smeared completely around your eyes in an intense racoon mask. Your hair was half out of the scrunchie you had pulled it into on the way home, hanging awkwardly on your neck. As you brushed your teeth, you tilted your head at the borrowed shirt realizing something off about it. You frowned at it in the mirror, trying to make out what the writing said. Whatever it was, it wasn’t Metallica. You spit in the sink and set your toothbrush to the side before pulling the shirt over your head. It didn’t say Metallica, it said Mozart in the Metallica font. 
You snorted a laugh, “Jayce, what the fuck?” Folding the shirt up, you shoved it into your bag, hoping you'd remember to wash it with your laundry. When you caught a glimpse of your bare torso in the mirror, you froze. 
Memories of last night came flooding back as you stared at the red marks scattered across your body. An unsteady line of hickeys connected one hip bone to the other,  a few were splayed up across your stomach and in a cluster across your chest. There was even one framed by a perfect bite mark on the top of your shoulder. 
“God damn…” You muttered, turning in the mirror in search of more. While you didn’t find any more hickeys sucked into your skin, you did find thin bruises on the sides of both your thighs from his fingers digging into your flesh. 
You stepped closer to the mirror, ghosting your fingertips over the marks. You couldn’t help but shudder at the memory of his hands on you. You could still feel him against you, his lips, his tongue, his teeth. You gripped the edge of the sink, willing the thoughts away. It was a hookup with a stranger who’s name wasn’t even known to you. It wasn’t going to happen again. 
Despite that fact, you thought of him in the shower until the water ran cold.
-----
Lest was awake when you made it back to your room. In the time it took you to shower she had managed to get dressed, make both herself and you coffee and frozen breakfast sandwiches, clean up your side of the room, and get the first season of Love Island up on your TV. She was stirring creamer into her coffee when you came in.
“Goodmorning,” You said, locking your door behind you, “How long have you been up?”
“Like, 45 minutes,” She said, setting the creamer to the side for you, “Were you in the shower that whole time?”
“Er, yeah, sorry. I wanted to shave,” You lied, a little surprised at how long you had actually been gone. You hoped Lest wouldn’t notice that you definitely had not shaved.
You dressed quickly. You and Lest had never been shy about changing in front of each other, but right now you had yourself angled awkwardly against your closet, praying to god she didn’t catch a glimpse of the love bites you were sporting. Luckily you managed to pull on a tshirt and sweats without her noticing. It’s not like you needed to hide from her, you usually told her everything as soon as it happened, but this time you wanted to keep it to yourself. At least for a little bit. You knew she’d have something, probably valid, to say about the complete unknown of the man you had sex with. She’d scold you on how dangerous it was and drag you to the health center to get tested for an STD.
“How’re you feeling?” She asked as you made up your coffee.
“A little like I was hit by a truck,” You shrugged, putting the cream away in your tiny fridge, “But I’ve definitely felt worse. You?”
“Better than I thought I would,” Lest told you, starting the show, “I didn’t drink much towards the end, and I didn’t smoke at all so I guess it makes sense.”
“You’re lucky,” You joked, climbing into bed with your coffee and breakfast, “We’re still doing nothing today right?”
“Oh, for sure.” Lest said nodding with wide eyes, “This is probably the last weekend we’ll be able to actually push homework off. Everything can wait until tomorrow.”
“Works for me,” You nodded, sipping your coffee and tuning into the trashy reality show you and Lest were hooked on.
You realized pretty quickly that all the gorgeous men and women and unhealthy relationships in the world wouldn’t distract you enough. You had figured post your incredibly long shower you’d be free of Pretty Boy, that the memory of him would ebb away. No luck.
By the time Micheal had been cast out of the Villa, you had managed to replay last night's events a hundred times in your head. It wasn’t just the sex that you were hyper focused on, it was every second you were near him. You kept thinking about how he looked in the kitchen, the way the lights moved over his skin and hair. The fact that even in the dark his eyes were still so bright and warm. You could hear  the lilt of his accent in your head, all the words he said to you, all the things he called you. 
What really stuck with you was how soft it all had been. How gentle and kind he had been with you. The way his voice sounded when he asked if you were leaving. How much you wished you had said no. This was going to haunt you for at least a week, you knew it would. You were preparing for it to be a very hard and very unfocused week.
Lest called you out a few times during the lazy afternoon, questioning your mental absence from the shared room. You brushed her off with excuses of exhaustion and nausea. You could tell she was worried, but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell her. Eventually, not many hours after waking up, you let yourself fall asleep to the thought of his lips on yours.
-------
On Sunday you woke up well before the sun, thanks to your early bedtime. You stared up at the ceiling, willing yourself back to sleep, but as your room slowly turned from pitch black into grey tones you knew it wasn’t going to happen. Quietly you pulled yourself out of bed and got ready for the day. It was barely even six by the time you were finished getting ready, but you were restless. Scribbling a note for Lest, you left your dorm. 
There was a time when you’d go on a walk before the sun was fully up every morning. It was when you enjoyed campus the most. The cold and quiet of it was comforting, it felt like home. Almost completely deserted at this hour. The only souls you ever saw this early were the landscapers, perfecting the small campus before the day began, and the occasional early rising professor walking a beloved campus dog. On a Sunday, though, it was truly empty. 
You wandered without really knowing where you were going, you let your feet remember the familiar path they once took so frequently. The sun barely peeked over the line of trees and brick buildings, casting long shadows over the quad. Dew grayed the grass, evaporating where the sun touched it. Eventually you reached the flower garden nestled between the two original buildings of the campus. You settled on a cold stone bench, the dedication plaque so worn it was nearly unreadable. 
You looked around the garden. The variety of flowers were in full bloom as the summer came to a close, each one tended to with great care. It was a sacred place on campus, for everyone. It was where most students had been introduced to the school, the garden being the meeting spot for all campus tours. During both matriculation and graduation, students paraded through it. The flowers were both a beautiful welcome and a bittersweet goodbye to those who chose Piltover for their education. It was impossible not to love it.
You sighed and picked at a patch of lichen on the edge of the bench. Remembering what else you used to do on these early walks, another habit you regretfully fell out of. You dragged your knees up to your chest and pulled your phone from your hoodie pocket. Your fingers were on autopilot as they navigated to your contacts.
It rang only once.
“Good morning Buddy,” Your dad’s voice was warming even through the phone.
“Good morning,” You said, leaning your cheek against your knee, “How are you?”
“I’m good, just getting ready to head out on the boat,” You could hear him shuffling around as he spoke. You could picture him, preparing for the day in the kitchen, “How are you? You’re up pretty early.”
“Working on a Sunday? That’s unlike you,” You joked, it was actually very like him, “I fell asleep early last night, couldn't go back to bed.”
“No, actually, not working today,” You heard the front door of your house open and close, “I’m headed out with the guys. The weathers going to be good for some deep fishing, today.”
“Oh good, that’ll be nice. I hope the catch is good,” You were glad he was taking time for himself, “Send me pictures if you get anything cool.”
“Of course buddy,” He laughed, you heard his truck start up, “Wait, so you went to bed early on a Saturday night? When did you become so boring?”
You scoffed, “Excuse me, are you mad that I am a responsible adult?”
“That’s not what I said!” He assured you.
“Yeah sure,” You rolled your eyes but smiled anyways, “Besides, it was friday night that I was out until three in the morning, rest assured I am certainly not boring.”
“Hm, okay,” He was quiet for a moment, “You’re making good decisions, I hope? Staying safe.”
You groaned at the implications of his words, embarrassed that they weren't actually that far off. He didn’t need to know that, though.
“Yes Dad, I am making perfectly fine decisions,” You half lied to him.
“Good to know. I’m too young to be a grandfather.”
“Ew,” You fake gagged, “Don’t say stuff like that.”
He laughed on the other end. It had been a week and a half since you saw him last, but you already missed the sound of him laughing, “How was your first week of classes?”
“Good,” You told him, “So far at least. I mean, it's the first week and I already have a good amount of homework to do, which sucks, but I think I can handle it.”
“Yeah, you’ve got this, though,” He assured you, never not confident in your abilities, “You always do. What classes are you taking again?”
“I have two envi-sci classes right now, one with a lab, a chemistry class with a lab, and I’m taking an Asian American Lit class, to keep myself from going crazy in the science building.” You told him, thinking about your particularly heavy science schedule, “I’m trying to switch chemistry classes, though. There's a smaller class with a…better professor. Not that my current professor is bad, it’s just that Heimerdinger is, like, the best professor here. I’d like to take at least one class with him. I’m on the waiting list.”
“Sounds like a good schedule. I’m glad you're taking a non-science class, it’ll be good for your brain,” He told you, “And I’ll cross my fingers you get into that class you want.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it.” You laughed, at this point you didn’t have much hope for getting in, but you could always try next semester.
“Hey, has your mom talked to you?” The question made you groan. 
“No, why?” You didn’t particularly want to talk to her, not since her 2nd remarriage last summer. 
“She called the other day and asked if she could have you for Christmas this year?” He was treading carefully, “I think you should.”
‘What? No way,” You answered immediately, offended at the idea that you would want to do that, “First of all, I’m not 15 anymore, neither of you get to have me, I can decide where I want to go for breaks. And second, Why would I want to spend break in Arizona with her child groom and his infant children?”
He was, clearly, not a child groom. Paul was 35, but in comparison to your mother’s age- 45- he might as well be a teenager. His kids weren’t infants either, 9 & 14, but, again, they might as well have been. 
“Hey, I know, I trust you to make your own decisions, but I also know that you’ve developed a lot of anger recently with your mom,” He sighed, “I don’t want you to have a bad relationship with her your whole life, it’s not healthy.”
“Really milking those two years of psychology undergrad, huh,” You joked bitterly. Your dad would have been the best therapist in the world if he had finished school. Your surprise arrival put an end to that half dream instantly. He never resented you for it. 
“I’m serious, buddy,” His voice was calm, urging you to be open, “It wouldn’t have to be for the whole break, just a couple days around Christmas. If you want to spend the rest of the time here with me you can, obviously. Just think about it?”
“Fine…I’ll think about it,” You pouted, he could convince you of anything, “But no promises.”
“Thank you, sorry for springing this on you right now.” You could hear chatter somewhere behind him, he was probably at the docks by now.
“It’s okay, sorry for being a brat about it,” You laughed softly.
“You’d be nothing without your attitude,” He teased, in the background you could hear someone calling his name.
“I get it from you,” That wasn’t entirely true, you and him both knew it, “But hey, I’ll let you go, sounds like you’re needed.”
“Yeah, the guys just showed up,” He admitted, “I can tell them to wait for a bit though if you want to keep talking?”
“Nah, it’s okay,” You insisted, checking the time, “I should probably go, anyways. Me and Lest are gonna go work on homework in a bit.”
“Okay, no problem,” He told you, you wished you could talk to him all day, you wished you were going fishing with him, “I’m proud of you, buddy, and I love you so much.”
“Love you too, Dad,” You said, trying to hold back tears, “Have fun out there, be safe.”
“Always am. Tell Lest I say hello for me, Love you.” He let you hang up the phone. 
You wrapped your arms around your legs and buried your head in your knees, unable to hold back the sobs. You let yourself cry. You didn’t think this was how you’d start your morning, but it was fine. Almost cathartic in a way, to let yourself be sad about something as childish as missing your dad who was only a day. You knew it was fine and very normal, but it still felt immature. Regardless, you let yourself cry until Lest finally texted you.
-------
The rest of the day was just as unexpected. When you headed back to your dorm Lest had just started to get ready. You laid in your bed, scrolling through your phone until she was ready. In the hour or so it took her to shower, get dressed, and gather her school work, the weather took a drastic change. You had wanted to lay out on the quad and do work, but the soft sunny sky was full of clouds now, all threatening rain. Instead, you and Lest headed to the small coffee shop on campus. Here it was much harder to focus. You camped out at a table in the corner, despite this everyone who knew you or her came over to chat. Meaning the amount of work you finished was…disappointing, to say the least. 
Then, due to the cafe's short Sunday hours, you had to relocate once again. At the overly polite requests of the baristas, you packed up and hauled off to the library. You wished you had come here in the first place. It was pretty much vacant this time of day and you and Lest set up in the quiet section, assuring no one would bother you even if they wanted to. Workflow was steady now, you managed to knock out one assignment after another. In the quiet of the library you were even able to focus on your textbook readings enough to take notes. 
As the afternoon began to turn to evening and the library began to fill up, you were finally in the home stretch. Lest was on her last set of practice questions for her math class and you had one more reading and a chemistry practice test to do. You’d probably be back to your room within the hour. You opened up the practice test, determined to get everything done. 
It was harder than you had expected. Some of the questions were fairly basic, things you knew from level one and even highschool chemistry, and there were a few that took a little effort but were fresh in your head from last semester. Almost half the questions, though, were questions that were completely foreign to you. You could make out bits and pieces of it in your brain. Some questions gently touched by your previous professors and others that you could make shaky assumptions on. You tried to remind yourself that this was a practice test for a reason, but the shitty score you knew would show at the end still bothered you. In the end you got 65%. 
You opened up your email to check for submission confirmation before moving on to the reading. A recent message at the top of the box made you pause. You read it quickly once, twice, three times. 
“I’m off the waitlist,” You told Lest, flinching when someone at a nearby table shushed you.
“What?” She whispered, leaning closer to see your laptop.
“I’m off the waitlist for chem,” You whispered back, opening up the class portal and accepting the offer.
“I thought you were in a chem class already?” She raised an eyebrow at you.
“Yeah, but I got into the class with the professor I actually want,” You explained, wishing you could be more excited than the setting allowed. 
“Oh, that's…good,” You could tell she didn’t quite get it, but wanted to be happy for you anyways.
“Yes, it’s very good,” You laughed, pushing your chair away from the table, “and as a reward, I’m gonna go piss.”
“Babe, please don’t give yourself a UTI because you only pee after academic success,” Lest jokingly begged, rubbing the space between her eyebrows.
You couldn’t hold back a laugh as you walked away from the table, ignoring the dirty looks from other tables. You were thrilled, a class with Heimerdinger genuinely opened up a world of connections. He knew scientists in every field all over the world. Of course, as the dean of the science department, he was willing to help any student make connections, but it was definitely easier if you were in his class. You were so happy about this, you didn’t mind that the practice test you just spent an hour on was for a class you were about to drop. 
You pulled out your phone, shooting off a text to your dad.
Got into the class I wanted! Thx 4 crossing ur fingers
He responded immediately.
Yay… that’s great, happy for you… wanna see the catch today?
You shook your head at the ellipses habit he refused to break. Such an old man.
TY!!! Yes obvi. Fish Now. 
He sent back a photo of himself and one of the older guys he fished with holding an impressively sized mahi mahi.
Omg mahi this late in the szn is craaazzyyy, very jealous
You couldn’t help the pang of sadness that bloomed in your chest. Missing your dad intensely for the second time that day.
Yeah, me and the guys were surprised for sure…I got go, talk to you later?
Oki!
Love you Buddy
Love u toooo
You slammed into someone in your distraction as you hit send. The apology coming out of your mouth only made it halfway, your mind and body freezing up at the flash of chestnut hair and pale skin above you. 
“Woah, watch it.” The guy, who you realized a second later was not in fact Pretty Boy, snapped at you.
“Sorry,” Your voice came out like a squeak, you cleared your throat, speaking louder, “Sorry, I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, it’s…uh it’s fine,” Not Pretty Boy said, looking down at you oddly, “Are you okay?”
You realized you were staring at him, studying all the ways in which he wasn’t Pretty Boy. Too stocky, face too round, hair too long, eyes a dull green. 
“Uh, yeah. I’m fine, sorry,” You shook your head, stepping past him as you apologized again.
You hurried off to the restroom, face burning as you locked yourself into a stall. You had managed to keep him out of your head all day. You dressed without looking at the marks he left behind, you kept your mind busy with work and thoughts of your family situation, you barely even acknowledged the fact that you had a body. 
And now after all that work, here you were, unable to think about anything besides him. You groaned and thumped your head against the stall door, knowing he’d be inescapable for the rest of the night. 
You stared at your hand on your leg, fingers digging into the bruises under your jeans. You had set your book down for the hundredth time, barely halfway through the reading, distracted again.  Every time you tried to read the words on the page, you wouldn’t get far. Unable to process any of the information you were looking at. It all felt like a different language. You could feel his hands pressing into your legs, his lips on your neck, accent in your ears.
Something hitting your forehead made you jump, startling you out of the daydream.
“Earth to struggling student,” Lest whispered, crumpling another sticky note and launching it at you.
You swatted the yellow paper away, frowning at her, “What?”
“Girl, where have you been this weekend?” Lest hissed, leaning across the table, eyebrows furrowed, “You’ve been weird ever since Jayce’s party. Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” You shrugged.
“Okay, liar,” She deadpanned, rolling her eyes, “What’s up?”
“Nothing!” You insisted, rifling the pages of your book. 
She stared at you, blink her big eyes expectantly. At this point, she wasn’t going to give up.
“I hooked up with someone at the party” You muttered, not looking at her.
“What?” She gasped, ignoring the looks from other tables. She stood and took the seat next to you, pulling her chair close and leaning in, “When?”
“When I went to wash my top in the garage,” You told her, chewing on your lip, “I wasn’t exactly smoking alone,”
“Oh my god!” She squeaked, eyes wide, “You fucked someone in Jayce and Cait’s garage??”
“Shhh,” You placed a palm over her mouth, worried about wandering ears, “Be quiet, I don’t need the whole student body to know.”
She just blinked at you over the top of your hand, waiting.
“Yeah, in the garage,” You could feel your face getting hot.
“Did you guys… like, get a home run? Or only make it to 3rd base?” She raised an eyebrow.
“What are you? 12?” You scoffed, glancing sideways as you told her, “...home run.”
“Good girl!” She punched you lightly on the arm, “Wait, that’s why you’ve been so spacy? You’ve been thinking about your little garage escapade all weekend?”
“Lest, you don't get it,” You insisted, “It was, like, amazing. Quite possibly the best sex I have ever had in my entire life. Like, honeymoon waited until marriage but somehow still perfect at it kind of sex.”
“No way,”
“Yes way, bitch,” You said, raising your eyebrows at her, “yes fucking way.”
“Damn…” She stared down at the table, then quirked her head to the side, “Who?”
There it was, the reason you hadn’t told her as soon as it happened.
“Um, well…” You hesitated. Lest narrowed her eyes at you, you could see her mind scrolling the list of possibilities. You cringed, “I don’t exactly know.”
Lest gaped at you, “What?”
“We were both high,” You admitted sheepishly, “And kind of caught up with other things. Names didn’t come up.”
“Are you crazy?”
“He was nice!” You defended, “Like, so fucking nice.”
“That is so dangerous!” She scolded, more concerned than mad, “Did you use a condom?”
“Christ, Lest, of course,” You rolled your eyes, “I’m not dumb.”
“I know, but you said you were high,” She shrugged, “Just wanted to make sure I didn’t need to find a way to squeeze a crib into our dorm.” 
“Twenties pregnancy is no joke,” You told Lest, trying to hold your face straight as long as you could before the corners of your mouth cracked upwards. 
“Damn, so great sex guy is anonymous,” She sighed, “That’s kind of a bummer. He goes here right?”
“He said he did,” You told her, “That’d be an odd thing to lie about, right?”
“Yeah, well, maybe you’ll see him at another party?” She said, hopeful.
“Yeah, maybe,” You sighed, “I don’t know, it was so good I almost don’t want to do it again.”
“That makes zero sense,” she scrunched her nose.
“I mean, I fucked this guy once for, like, an hour.” You explained, “And he is all I’ve been able to think about for the past two days. Do I really want to do this again?”
“Well, if you make it a habit,” She offered.
“I don’t know,” You sighed, shaking your head, “It sucks, but I think it’s better if it doesn't happen again. I don’t think my grades could handle it.” You waved the book you had tried and failed to read for the past hour. 
“Skill issue.” She shrugged, shutting her laptop, “Do you have to finish that reading tonight? I wanna get dinner.”
“Uh, thanks Lest, very cool,” You scoffed, rolling your eyes at her joke, “And I’m not going to be able to anyways. I’ll finish it before class tomorrow.”
“Okay good,” Lest said, standing and stretching her arms over her head, “I’ll get us Thai if you promise details.”
“Hm, you know, I’m not against trading my secrets for pad thai and mango rice,” You laughed, packing your stuff up.
Clasping her hands together she determined, “This is, like, better than Love Island.” 
You just scoffed, shaking your head at her.
-------
As thrilled as you were to be taking Heimerdinger's class, there was one tiny drawback. It was your first and only seven am. You had managed four whole semesters of not having to be in a class until at least nine. That was very much on purpose, because dragging yourself out of bed at five in the morning was not your idea of a good start to the day. 
As much as you wanted to skip past your first alarm and show up to class unshowered and in sweatpants, you figured that wasn’t the most professional first impression to make on the dean. So you got up like a good student. You took your time getting ready and double checking that you had everything you’d need for your two classes of the day, preferring to not haul back to the dorm between them. You had correctly calculated enough time to stop at the cafe on the way to grab coffee with a higher caffeine content than what you could make in your room. 
There were quite a few seven am classes available, but given that you were over 30 minutes early, the halls of the science building were still fairly deserted. A few offices were lit up and some classrooms had TAs setting up for the day, but not much student presence yet. When you found the room the schedule had directed you to, you were pleased to see it was empty. It’d be easier to talk to who you considered the most intimidating professor on campus without an audience.
The classroom was small, but you knew the lab attached through a door at the back would be much bigger. Professor Heimerdinger was sitting behind the desk at the front, fidgeting with the desktop computer. You knocked on the doorframe to get his attention.
“Good morning Professor Heimerdinger,” You greeted, stepping partially into the room as you told him your name, “I was on the waitlist until last night, I wasn’t sure if they told you I had moved off of it.”
“Oh! Good morning, dear,” He beamed from under his impressively large mustache, moving away from the computer, “Yes, it was mentioned that there may be a change in the roster. I’m glad you were able to move up from the waitlist. Welcome.”
“Thank you,” You smiled, you had never been in the same room as the esteemed man, only ever seen him give speeches or in passing around campus, you walked over to his desk, “I’m also glad to be here, I’ve been looking forward to taking one of your classes. I’ve heard great things.”
“That’s very kind of you to say,” He walked around his desk and extended a hand up towards you. Due to his short stature you had to bend just slightly at the waist to return the gesture, “I’m glad to have you in class, your name is familiar. Are you acquaintances with Mr. Jayce Talis, by chance?”
You knew Jayce had been lucky enough to score Heimerdinger as his advisor and close mentor, you were surprised he had mentioned you, though.
“Yes, actually, Jayce is a very close friend of mine,” You told him, trying to hide a nervous laugh, “Has he been speaking of me?”
“Only good things, my dear,” He said, picking up on your anxiety, “I assure you.”
“Good to know,” You laugh, hoping it wasn’t too loud in the small space, “Thank you, again, I am really grateful for the opportunity to be in your class.”
“Well of course,” He told you, moving back around his desk as he spoke, “Have you been able to acquire the reading materials for the class?”
“I ordered the textbook last night,” You explained, “I should have it by the end of the week. I’m sure I can borrow a copy from a classmate for the time being.”
“No need, I have an extra copy you are welcome to use until yours arrives,” He pulled a dense book from under his desk, “It’s an earlier edition, though, so just be sure that you read the correct sections.”
“Thank you, I appreciate it,” You took the worn book, he also handed you a printed syllabus, “Was there reading for today? I could try to get some of it done before class starts.”
“Last week’s schedule became a little jumbled due to my being under the weather, so the first reading is due next class, if you would like to review the syllabus and schedule before class, you will be all caught up,” He explained. You couldn’t describe the relief this gave you, “We only met for one class last week, so you aren’t behind, but the class has already been divided into groups for the semester. I apologize that you were not here for the grouping. I allow students to choose who they work with, so if you see someone you know feel free to join their group.”
“Okay, thank you.” You nodded and turned to find a seat.
As Heimerdinger returned back to his computer, you set up in the corner of the room. The syllabus was fairly basic, but gave a good explanation of the Professor’s expectations. You were sure this wasn’t going to be an easy class, but you were also sure you’d enjoy the challenge. The only thing that was making you anxious was the fact that  none of the students that showed up were familiar to you. You watched as the clock ticked closer and closer to seven, your knee bouncing under the table. You tried to distract yourself by skimming through the borrowed textbook, settling on a random section to pass the time with.
You were halfway through the chapter about asymmetric oxidation and reduction when a newer copy of the book was dropped on the table in front of you with a bang. You jumped, looking up in surprise.
“Hey stranger,” Jinx smirked down at you, nodding at your book,“Pretty impressive reading pace you’ve got there.”
“Jinx!” You stood, wrapping your arms around her, “I didn’t know you were in this class.”
“Ekko is too, he’ll be here in a minute,” She told you as you settled into your seats, the room was busy now, “Were you on the waitlist?”
“Yeah, this class was a bitch to get into,” You frowned, then realized something, “Wait, how did you get in? You’re a sophomore this year right? This is an upperclassmen class.”
She laughed sheepishly, shrugging, “Ha, well you know, nepotism isn't always bad.”
“No way, Silco got you in? You lucky bitch,” You gasped, but were not surprised that her dad, who happened to be a well respected professor in the business program, had managed to get her into a higher level class. 
“Yeah, and Ekko,” She pulled the rest of her things from her bag, blowing a strand of freshly dyed blue hair out of her face, “You should have told me, I could have gotten you in, too.”
“Sorry, friend nepotism didn’t cross my mind,” You laughed, waving at Ekko as he walked into the room, “I’ll keep it in mind for next time, though.”
“Always got your back, babe,” Jinx gave an over exaggerated smile, all teeth.
Ekko slid into the seat next to Jinx, setting a coffee cup down in front of her, “Hey, where were you last week?” He laughed, extended a fist out for you to bump.
“Still on the waitlist,” You laughed, pulling out your things as other students began to settle into their seats.
“Glad you're here,” He told you, “You wanna be part of our group right?”
“Yes please,” You said with exaggerated begging,“I was worried I’d have to join people I didn’t know.”
“Yeah, there’s a reason I drag him into every class I take,” Jinx laughed, jerking her thumb over to Ekko.
“Yeah, I’m sure the fact that I always give you my notes has nothing to do with it,” He raised an eyebrow at her.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” She stuck her nose up in the air, giving him a side eye.
You couldn’t help but to laugh at them, their large personalities combined to make one big ball of loud and colorful and smart. You had spent a lot of your free time during your summer research with them. Jinx had convinced you to join their little band and you three terrorized the others with very loud and not so great music playing. You were excited to be in class with them. Looking around, though, you noticed that all the other groups consisted of at least three people, some of them even holding five. 
“Are you guys a group of two?” You tilted your head, it would be odd for the Professor to let them do that in a class that seemed to be very group focused.
“What? Oh, no there’s three of us,” Ekko told you, “I don’t know if you’ve met him yet. It’s Jayce’s new roommate, Viktor. I don’t know why he isn’t here yet.”
You laughed, part of you still wondering if this was some insane joke that everyone was really really dedicated to, “Haven't met him, yet, but I’ve heard of him plenty of times.”
“Wasn’t he at the party on Friday?” Jinx asked, “He said Jayce had convinced him to go.”
“Jayce kept saying he was there, but I never ran into him,” You shrugged, “I’m still not convinced he’s real.”
“Yeah, you got us,” Jinx said, dead serious, “He isn’t real.”
“Wait what?” You side eyed her.
“Also we wrote gullible on the ceiling,” She rolled her eyes, you resisted the urge to look up, “Viktor is very real, I promise. He’s super smart too, like, almost as smart as me.”
“Always humble, babe,” Ekko said, patting Jinx on the arm, “Always humble.”
Class began then, Heimerdinger calling everyone's attention to the front of the room. You settled into the flow of it pretty quickly. You weren’t surprised that he managed to be an engaging professor. You’d sat through plenty of his speeches and presentations over the past two years, and never for a second did you find yourself bored during them. He gave a quick overview of what the next couple of weeks were going to look like and then passed around paper practice tests. You were a little disappointed to have to do another one.
This test ended up being somewhat easier than the one you had taken last night, only a few of the questions really escaped you. You could tell this was a test meant to gauge how much the class knew as opposed to how much they didn’t. You had just flipped to the last page when the door to the classroom opened. As much as you wanted to keep your eyes down and not contribute to the awkward stares you were sure everyone was already giving, instinct kicked in and you couldn't help but to glance up.
You froze.
There was no way.
This was not happening. 
You blinked a few times, mouth hanging open as you watched Pretty Boy lean over Heimerdinger's desk, speaking too quiet for you to hear with an apology written all over his face. Your heart dropped all the way down to the center of the earth, your lungs dried out and you felt like your head was under waves.
When Pretty Boy turned around, his perfect amber eyes immediately landed on yours. Freezing, his eyes widened slightly in an expression you were sure was identical to yours. Poorly hidden horror. You looked away, eyes dropping to your paper, the grip around your pencil was tight enough to turn your knuckles white. You could hear him walking straight for your table, cane tapping along with his footsteps.
You furrowed your eyebrows at the table. Why was he coming this way? There were plenty of other seats. Was now the time to confront you? In the quietest classroom imaginable. He slid into the seat next to you.
“Hey Viktor,” Jinx whispered, glancing up before going back to her test.
Viktor. He was Viktor. Pretty Boy was the roommate you were convinced didn’t exist. The one you had just told Jinx you had never met. The reality that you had, in fact, met him very intimately was crashing down around you. You raced back through your memory, all the little dots that you should have connected immediately snapped together. The music he was listening to, the smoking, that he was even in the garage in the first place, the reason you hadn’t recognized him despite being in your year, the fact that you never saw him leave the house. 
He fucking lived there. He was Jayce’s roommate. You had fucked Jayce’s roommate. 
You could feel his eyes on the side of your face as these thoughts ran through your head. You looked up at him, his closeness making you dizzy, but not in a pleasant way like last time. His face was nearly blank, only the slightest pull to his eyebrows that didn’t  give away any of his thoughts. You had never felt the desire to know what someone else was thinking, not really, not until this very moment. 
Not knowing what to do, you let out a shaky breath and went back to your paper. The room was too quiet to speak to him, you could do nothing but endure the remaining time it took for everyone to finish their tests and hope you didn’t faint.
You were keenly aware of his presence next to you. Everything was taken up by Pretty Boy. By Viktor. You could feel the heat of his leg close to yours, you could smell the cologne he was wearing. The scratching of his pen as he started the test was the only sound you could hear. You felt like you were going crazy. At this moment you were sure you could have been committed to a state hospital. The words on the page blurred in front of you. You scribbled out incorrect equations a dozen times before Hiemerdinger finally concluded that everyone was done. 
“I will review these and adjust our scheduled content accordingly,” He told the class as the tests were passed forward, “As an unplanned reward for enduring my data collection, please talk amongst yourselves while I battle with technology. I will begin today’s lesson as soon as possible.”
“Nice,” Jinx said to herself as chatter started up in the classroom, she turned to Pret- to Viktor, “Dude, where were you?”
“Sorry, I was stuck behind a school bus,” He told her, his accent was less thick than you remember, “it wasn’t a problem last week, I wasn’t prepared.”
“Oh, yeah, school just started this week for little kids,” She nodded, she was lost in thought for a moment, no doubt thinking about picking up Isha from school later. She snapped back to the present and told him your name, “She’s part of the larger group, I’m surprised you haven't met yet.”
His eyes met yours and when he said your name, you could have melted all the way to the ground floor, “It’s nice to meet you, are you…joining our group?”
It took you a moment to realize he was holding a hand out to you. You shook it, trying to be as firm as you could, but you knew your hands were shaking. 
“Nice to meet you, too, ” You said, “Um, I can find another group if you-”
“No,” He said, too quickly, “No, that’s not necessary, I’m glad to have you work with us.”
You did your best not to read into that, “Glad to be here.”
“Heimerdinger wanted us to schedule an out of class work time,” Ekko told you, drawing your attention away from Viktor’s face, “We were thinking Friday’s right after class, since we won’t have lab.”
“That works for me,” You nodded, trying to settle into your chair and be casual.
“Cool, I’ll send a calendar invite,” He said, always the proactive one.
“You are friends with Jayce?” Viktor asked, tilting his head at you.
“Yep,” You nodded awkwardly, unsure how to talk to him, “Since freshman year,”
“Hm, interesting.” He mused. 
You hated this. It was so uncomfortable and not at all like the last time you had spoken to him. Even aside from the fact that you weren’t fucking, the few words said were clunky and awkward. You were realizing that the drugs and alcohol you had consumed might have had something to do with the ease of conversation. It made you sad. You knew this was stupid. You knew you were being childish. You were an adult, sex shouldn’t be the cause of this unbearable awkwardness. You should be able to talk to someone you hooked up with, without being on the verge of a panic attack. Luckily, Heimerdinger’s technical difficulties came to an end. He drew back everyone's attention and put a halt to your terrible conversation. You turned away from Viktor, facing the front as the intro to advanced ochem lecture began. 
The rest of class, thankfully, went smoother than you expected. Your group fell into a good rhythm, working together between bouts of notes to work on practice problems. Viktor was less tense, which let you relax a degree. He was more than willing to help you navigate your textbook, looking over your shoulder to check that you were on the right section. He even helped you find the reading for next class, tearing a piece of paper from his notebook and placing it in the pages. There wasn’t a lab planned for the day, so Heimerdinger continued his lecture well into the scheduled lab time. By the end of the four hours, you had written down almost ten pages of notes. Your hands ached.
“Apologies for the lecture heavy class, everyone. Having to cancel our first class last week meant I needed to catch everyone up” Heimerdinger said as he closed out the presentation, “I promise from here on we will utilize the last two hours as lab time. Have a good rest of your day everyone, I will see you on Wednesday.”
You scooped your things into your bag and slung it over your shoulder, “I’ve gotta get to another class, see ya around.”
You darted out of the door before anyone could reply. Your head was filled with too many thoughts. You took the stairs down, doing your best to organize the mess in your brain. You created a list. First, the things you needed to do, right now. Finish the reading for Asian American Lit, number one. Number two, go to your Asian American Lit class. Then, the things that could wait until after. Telling Lest about Viktor/Pretty Boy dilemma. Though, she would be mad that you didn’t call her at that very moment. Asking Jinx to add you to the group chat, meaning you'd have his number. Yeah, that you could wait on. Then the things you decided could wait forever. Number one, talking to Viktor. It’s all you wanted to do. And at the same time you’d rather spontaneously combust than confront that awkward conversation. 
You were free of the overpowering AC of the science building for less than a minute before the task you decided never needed to happen, happened. Against your will, of course.
“Wait up!” Your steps faltered for a second at the sound of Viktor’s voice calling after you. You ignored him, continuing as if you hadn’t heard. He shouted your name, “I know you can hear me!”
You stopped staring at the hot sidewalk for a moment. No. You had somewhere to be, things to do. You shook your head without turning around and kept walking.
“If you take one more step, you’re ableist!” He shouted, out of breath.
You froze and turned slowly to look at him, jaw hanging open, “That is not funny.”
“Got you to stop didn’t it,” He panted, closing the distance between you, he knocked his cane against the side of your calf, “And, I do believe running from a man with a cane can be considered ableist.”
“First of all, I am not running from you,” You lied, looking up at him. You stepped a half inch to the side, using his shadow to block your eyes from the sun, “And second, if I happened to be running from you, it certainly is not because you use a mobility aid.”
“Okay Miss PC,” He rolled his eyes, “Doesn’t matter why, if I deem it ableist, it is.”
You opened your mouth to argue, floundering for what to say. You don’t remember him being this infuriating at the party.
“Exactly,” He said as you snapped your jaw closed.
“Viktor,” You sighed, “What do you want?”
He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, tilting his head at you. He gave a soft laugh, “I have been waiting all weekend to hear you say my name.”
Breathing would have been easier if he punched you. You blinked up at him, watching him watch you.
“I’m sorry, can I…” He looked around, noticing that other students were leaving the building as their classes ended. You two were standing in the dead center of the sidewalk and in the late summer heat his pale cheeks were already turning pink, “Can we just talk for a second, please?”
He didn’t wait for you to respond before he stepped off the main path and began walking into the flower garden. The dry gravel crunched under his shoes as he walked, the sound amplified in your brain as you followed after him. He settled under a latticed arch, the honeysuckle vines that snaked around it shading you both from the midday sun. 
“I’m sorry,” You said, frowning at him.
“For what?” He asked, face confused.
For running away. For not asking your name. For leaving. For joining your class.
“I don’t know.” Was all you could manage.
“You know, apologies lose a lot of their value if you don’t know what you're apologizing for,” He narrowed his eyes, voice almost scolding.
“I..I know, I’m sorry.”
“You say sorry too much,” He laughed, shaking his head, he didn’t look upset, “It’s very American of you.”
“Well, I am American,” You pointed out, letting yourself laugh softly with him, “I’m sorry for that too,” You joked.
“Well, let me apologize?” He asked, “I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable in class, it truly was not my intention.”
That was an apology. A real and true apology.
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” You shook your head, “Fuck, if anyone had a right to feel weird, it was you.”
He tilted his head in question.
“I mean, it was your class first,” You told him, “I just kinda…showed up.”
“Did you join the class because I was in it?” 
“Well, no,” You laughed softly, “How could I have, I didn't even know your name.”
“That’s true,” He scoffed, “I regret that, by the way, I should have asked your name. Not very polite to ask after having sex with someone.”
“Eh, it happens to the best of us,” You shrugged, liking the laugh he gave you in response.
“Well, I am glad I know now,” He told you, eyes moving across his face, he smirked, “It’s a pretty name.”
“Hm, thanks, I like yours quite a lot as well,” You smiled up at him, the step closer he took didn’t go unnoticed, “It suits you, almost as much as Pretty Boy.”
“Thank you,” He smiled down at you, chewing on the inside of his cheek. 
“What?” You could tell there was something else he wanted to say.
“Can I take you out?” He asked, taking a nervous breath, “I know we kinda did this in a backwards manner, but I…you are very interesting to me, I would like to take you out properly.”
Your stomach twisted. Your chest felt like it was caving in.
“No,” You said, head shaking slightly as you offered a sad smile. The unexpected hurt that flashed in his eyes killed you.
“Oh, um,” He stumbled over his words, clearly taken aback by your refusal, he tried to step away, “Okay.”
“Hey wait,” You reached out, grabbing his wrist before you could escape, “Listen, it’s not you.”
He narrowed his eyes at you, begging you not to embarrass him any further with a cliche line.
“Really, I swear,” You urged, not letting go until he stepped back towards you, “I just… I don’t date classmates. I don’t sleep with classmates. Even if I want to. It causes problems, it makes class awkward, and I can’t risk my GPA just because I find someone attractive.”
He hummed to himself, nodding as he took in your words.
“So…” He reached out, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, the same way he did when you were straddling his lap, “You’re saying you find me attractive?”
You resisted the urge to lean into his palm, instead you grabbed his wrist and pulled his lingering hand away from your face, “Don’t do that.”
“I’m confused, you’ve already slept with me? So what does it matter?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you. He was so fucking handsome you wanted to scream.
“Because, at the time, we weren’t classmates.” You explained like it was obvious.
“Okay, so let me get this straight, you will be in a relationship - sexual or romantic - with someone as long as they aren't an active classmate?” He asked, lip curling up in confusion, “But if they were a past classmate, or in our case, a future classmate, it's fine?”
“Exactly,” You shrugged, “I think that’s perfectly reasonable.”
“That’s actually very unreasonable.” He told you, “And also does not make much sense to me.”
“Well, good thing it’s a rule for myself.” You huffed, “You don’t have to understand, you just have to respect it.”
“So, if we were in separate classes, would you go out with me?” He asked.
“Probably, yes.” You admitted.
“But not now, because we are in the same class.”
“Yes, exactly.”
“So, if I ask you when the class is over, you’d say yes?” He leaned towards you, probing.
“Maybe.” You shrugged, “Who’s to say you won’t hate me by the end of the semester?”
“Well, considering you seem to be friends with the only people I know at this school, that would be rather unfortunate.” His voice lowered at the end, he was closer to you know. Very much within kissing distance. Right now there was nothing more you wanted than to feel his lips against yours. You know they’d be cool in comparison to the stagnant summer air.
You didn’t. Instead, you took a step back, and shoved your hand out into the distance between you, “Friends and classmates? Can you do that?” You asked, he studied your hand like the offer was written on it, then sighed.
“Fine, I can respect your rules,” He took your hand in his, firm and strong and cold, “Friends and classmates…for now.”
He moved his index finger softly across the inside of your wrist as he held your hand, goosebumps sprinting up your arm. You carried that feeling with you for the rest of the day.
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saturnville ¡ 10 months ago
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bite, l. hamilton
pairing: he (lewis hamilton) x black best friend oc (anvika dawson) content: in which two friends cross a line people have been waiting for them to cross. warning: 18+ content song: bite by njzoma an: y'all know I don't write smut fr, so ntm. but I hope y'all enjoy it. wc: 2,498 tags: the girlies who were hyping me up to post this @boujiestpoet @mauvecherie-writes @saintslewis @greedyjudge2 @vile-harlot @emjayewrites
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“Just because we’re attracted to one another doesn’t mean we need to sleep together. I’m off that. Plus, we’re friends.”
Anvika prided herself on being a woman of self-control and discipline. Though it did not come easy, years of abstinence grew dreary and at times, very lonely, her hard work was not something she was willing to risk. Her decision to step into abstinence wasn’t one she took lightly, nor was it one that she planned, but once Anvika began the journey of healing from a heartbreak, intimacy with another man wasn’t the priority. Though that had been over four years ago and she was well over the situation, she could admit that while it was difficult to maintain her self-control, not having to worry about anyone’s snot-nosed son brought more peace than she could ever imagine. 
“Even more of a reason to let it happen. Everything happens better when you have a solid foundation first. Everybody thinks you two are together anyways. He truly cares for you, in more ways than one.” 
Anvika hummed and rolled her eyes as she brought the slender champagne fluke to her full lips. The liquid went smooth down her throat. She shrugged. “Then let them think that. Lewis is a good man, a good and attractive man, but…”
Her friend, Onyx, sighed and downed her drink with a wave of her hand. “I don’t know how you do it! I would’ve lost my mind by now. I commend you.” Onyx bowed playfully which pulled a light laugh from Anvika. Though she was joking, she couldn’t help but sense the truth behind her words. 
Though swearing off men and intimacy had become a more common practice among women, many people found it taboo and unrealistic. She soon began to ponder--what if she’d never find anyone that could give her what she wanted because of how she chose to navigate her dating life? She shook it off internally. That would be a problem, but none that would be hers. 
Before she got the chance to respond, her phone rang against the glass table that held their expensive lunch on it’s back. LH flashed across the screen. She smiled softly which caught the attention of Onyx, who gave a teasing smirk. For someone who was insistant on keeping a strong boundary between herself and her closest friend, she surely smiled like a fool whenever he called. 
“I told you I have a lunch date with Onyx today,” she reminded the racer lowly, using her index finger to draw doodles in the condensation her water glass sweat off on the table. “Everything alright?” 
“Everything’s fine, angel,” he spoke smoothly. “Just wanted to make sure you were still wanting to join me for the event on Friday.” Anvika hummed and nodded as though he could see her. He was attending a gala in London and of course, offered his plus-one to Anvika, as he had done since their friendship had begun years prior. What was his, was hers, including access to rooms and events that would grant her opportunities to further her career as a branding and marketing consultant. 
“Yes,” she replied excitedly. “I still haven’t found a dress. What color are you wearing?”
There was shuffling in the background before he spoke again. “Blue. Don’t worry about it,  I’ll handle it.” Her heart fluttered. “Enjoy your lunch. Tell Onyx I said hello and call me later, alright?” 
Anvika’s teeth trapped her bottom lip. “Alright. Talk soon.” 
“Bye, love.” 
Anvika turned her phone on its face and looked up, catching Onyx’s playful eyes. Her thick eyebrow touched her forehead. “Friends, right?” Anvika gave her a look. Onyx raised her hands in defense, “My bad, my bad.” 
-
Lewis Hamilton was a gentleman. Sure, this was universal knowledge, but something about him being gentlemanly with her made her heart flutter and her stomach clench with desire. And it almost made her question Onyx’s point, “he truly cares for you; in more ways than one.” It’d typically be something she’d deny, but as she stood in front of the mirror with her hair done by a hairstylist he arranged to come, her nails done by a nail technician he’d flown out, and a dress he arranged to be custom-made to suit her body, how could she deny it any longer? 
“Don’t think too deeply into it,” she scolded herself, slipping out of her robe. She walked toward her dress, pulled it off the hanger, and carefully slipped into it. “You’re friends. Close friends who care for one another. That’s it, that’s all.” 
They met at the paddock six years prior. She was invited to her first Formula One race through her consultant agency, which took her team on an all-expense paid trip for their hard work. She wasn’t aware of Formula One, just of familiar names. Then, at the end of the match, she had the chance to put a face to the infamous name of Lewis Hamilton. 
“You raced well,” Anvika noted, taking in the slightly disheveled appearance of the raceman. “I’ve never been to a Formula One race; good job on giving me a reason to come back one day.” 
The man’s eyebrow raised in interest. He crossed his arms over his chest, his muscular build on display. “Is that so?”
Anvika nodded. 
“We can make that happen whenever you want.” 
It was Anvika’s turn to raise an eyebrow. A smirk played on her lips. “Is that so? Tryna be my friend, Lewis?” 
He shrugged his shoulders. Friends wasn’t too bad. Anything to get to know her. “Any man would be a fool to refuse that opportunity, Anvika.”
That marked the beginning of an inseparable union.
Anvika continued to mumble and grumble, doing whatever she could to keep her mind eased. Her self-conversations were halted by a knock on her door. Lewis. “Coming!” Holding her dress to her chest. She turned the doorknob, and the familiar scent of his cologne filled her nose. “Are you…oh. Oh.”
Closing the door behind him, Lewis’ eyes were trained on her, the most beautiful woman he’d laid eyes on. The dress, complementary to his suit, was perfectly designed and tailored to her. She was a fan of long-sleeved dresses, so that’s what she got. It was constructed with a heavy, luxurious velvet material and it hugged every riff, edge, and curve on her body. The neckline showed the swell of her breasts and her beautiful collarbone. The mermaid-like tail further accentuated her shape. 
Her hair was parted to the side and curled to perfection. The makeup complimented her features--thick eyebrows, full lips, and a round nose. And her scent, goodness, it suffocated him. The jasmine and almond notes filled his nostrils and he wanted to nuzzle his face in her neck and inhale like she was the air he needed to breathe. 
“You look beautiful,” Lewis managed to speak. His voice was so low that she almost didn’t hear his compliment. With a bashful smile, she thanked him and led him to her room where she wandered toward the bathroom, which had a series of jewels across the counter. “Help me pick a necklace?” 
Anvika turned to face the jewelry and fought hard to ignore the heat that radiated from Lewis’ body as he moved to stand behind her. From over her shoulder, his eyes followed the line of jewels the stylists brought. His eyes landed on a silver necklace; a thin chain with a multi-carat teardrop diamond. “This one.” 
Lewis took the necklace in his hands and placed it around her neck. Anvika lifted her hair to grant him easy access and shivered as his cool fingertips brushed against her skin. She inhaled deeply. “Stunning.” His breath was warm against her neck. They locked eyes in the mirror ahead of them. The tension was thick. Suffocating. His brown eyes, usually so full of love and warmth, were filled with something she couldn’t quite identify, but it made her body heat like wildfire. 
“I’m ready,” she announced, careful not to let her voice waver. She turned, purposefully ignoring the groan he released when she brushed against him. Her lips quivered as she tried to give a steady smile. What the hell was happening between them? Anvika placed her hands on his chest and soothed the non-existent wrinkles on his suit jacket. He was so handsome. “You look great, darling.” 
“Thank you…” his words came out as a whisper. He was too distracted by her. Six years of friendship and what he felt from the time he met her at the paddock all those years ago had reached a breaking point. He’d boiled over. 
Anvika tried to smile as she pressed a kiss against his cheek, but with how he reacted, her lips landed at the corner of his lips. She took a step back. “Let’s get ready to go, yeah?” 
Lewis swallowed thickly. He held his arm out for her, which she grabbed instinctively, and together, they were out the door with a million and one thoughts swimming between them. 
-
“And that beauty you’ve brought?” an older man questioned Lewis, who had his eyes on Anvika as she danced through the siloes of people in the room. The gala was nothing short of a popularity function, a random event on a random weekend for the host to flaunt their money and connections, Truthfully, his desire to attend dwindled once he saw her in that dress. She was the only thing on his mind. 
“Anvika Dawson,” Lewis said, nodding in her direction. “One of the best branding and marketing consultants in the industry. She’s amazing at everything she does. You’ve got a business, don’t you?” And that’s why he was a good friend, Anvika noted as she began to walk over, hearing him advocate for her in front of the man. 
“You flatter me,” she said with a smile as she took a position under Lewis’ arm, which slid around her waist. “Anvika Dawson, nice to meet you.” 
The older man, who had went by the nam Eli, shook her hand firmly and nodded in interest. “Well, pardon me, but the two of you would make a wonderful couple.” The young adult chuckled lightly; the comment was nothing new to them, but it seemed to bring them both discomfort given the fact that they had a very intimate moment just an hour before their arrival. Before Lewis could speak up, Anvika thanked the man sweetly then they were whisked in another direction. 
They were joined together at the hip for the remainder of the evening. And, on the rare occasion that they were apart, they stole glances from across the room like teenagers in a romantic sitcom. Soon, the event wrapped up and they were in the backseat of the car, sitting in a thick silence. 
Anvika sat at the right of the car, her knees turned inward and her legs crossed. With every bump in the road and swerve of the car, the tip of her heel brushed against Lewis’ leg. His breath hitched. She said nothing. 
The car came to an abrupt stop and the doors were opened for them. Before her foot could touch the ground, Lewis’ hand was awaiting. “Thank you,” Anvika said softly, and allowed him to guide her into the hotel. 
He still hadn’t said much. The walk to the elevator was quiet, yet, he hadn’t let go of her hand. What was he thinking about? If it was the sudden shift in their interactions, it didn’t go unnoticed by her either. 
The elevator doors peeled open and Lewis guided her in. He pressed the button, 10, that would send them to the floor their rooms were on. The elevator ride seemed slow as each ding indicated they’d entered another floor. 
Anvika cleared her throat and decided to speak up, “I enjoyed tonight. And again, you looked great. I love blue on you.” 
He couldn’t remember what happened between her compliment, her back against the elevator wall, and his lips on hers.  The only thing that forced him to key in was her hands pressing against his abdomen and his name falling from her lips. “Lewis…” What he’d heard time and time again in his dreams had finally become a reality. His stomach churned; could he get her to say it again? “What are you…” She cut herself off when she fell victim to the wonderful feeling of his lips against her jaw. 
“I just…” Lewis settled his face in her neck. “One night, Vi. Let me have one night with you…” Her heart pounded in her ears. What the hell was happening? 
“Lewis…” Her hand slipped and fell just above his belt. She extended her arm just slightly. “We can’t do this. I-I don’t want to mess up our friendship and you know I’m not going all the way with anyone--” 
Lewis hummed. His eyes sat low as he looked at her. She looked completely worn out as if he’d done to her what he truly wanted. Her forehead glistened with sweat, her lipstick was smeared, and her chest heaved. “Nothing will change for the worse, angel. And I don’t want to go there with you, just want to make you feel good…always have.” His left arm circled around her waist and his large hand palmed her backside. She whimpered. “Can I?” 
“Someone might see...” 
He ignored her. “Can I make you feel good?” His tone was stern as he repeated his question. Suddenly, the gala was out of her mind and the only thing that clouded her thoughts was him. Him and him only. Lewis Hamilton had infiltrated her mind and she finally stopped fighting it. 
The elevator dinged. “Yes…” 
-
“Should I…?” her hands reached for the necklace that shone beneath the dim lights of the hotel suite. Lewis shook his head and peeled his jacket off his shoulders, revealing a crisp white wife beater. He shed that too. Anvika’s breath hitched. “Keep it on. Lay back for me, angel.” 
Anvika looked like an angel surrounded by the comforter. Her undergarments were long discarded, save for her underwear which he kept in the pocket of his pants. The pure white of the sheets were a stark contrast to the richness of her complexion. Her hair was sprawled against the pillow with a few strands covering her face lazily. The look on her face was one of comfort, relief in one way or another. 
She welcomed Lewis’ body between her legs as he crawled on the bed and his lips against hers as he hovered above her. For the first time that night, Anvika’s hands didn’t tremble when she touched him. She welcomed the feeling of every ridge of muscle, every raised scar, and every mature tattoo. 
Their hands moved frantically over each other’s body, and it felt amazing. She hadn’t realized how touch deprived she was until she heard his chuckle in her ear. Her face warmed. She felt like a teenager. “It’s okay…” his lips ghosted against the shell of her ear. “Make all the noise you want.” 
Anvika didn’t respond--her mouth wouldn’t allow her to. As Lewis moved down her body, she sat on her elbows, watching and waiting. God, he was so handsome like this. His head was dipped between her thighs and his tattooed glistened under the dim lights. Slowly, he lips created an intentional trail from her belly down to the treasure just centimeters away from his mouth. 
Her fingers clawed at the bedsheets as the anticipation rose. She was becoming impatient. He was giving attention to every other place except where he wanted her. She huffed. “Lewis…” 
He hummed, clearly unbothered by her frustration. He glanced at her, “Yes?” She whimpered. “Talk to me.” He was amused, very amused. She was desperate for him. It was evident by the way her arousal seeped onto the bed. He gathered some on his fingers, using it as a lubricant as he finally began to touch her. 
Anvika gasped. His movements were slow and meticulated but they were enough to set her over the edge. He brought his lips to hers again, which she accepted sloppily. Her jaw fell slack as he continued to work her to her first release of the night. It came quickly, quicker than she would have liked. When his fingers hit that spot within her, her hips jerked and she squeaked his name. 
Lewis chuckled, “That’s it?” He prodded that spot again. “Right there?” Anvika nodded. He removed his fingers. She groaned in frustration, “Lewis, please!”
“Please what?” He brought his fingers to his lips and moaned at the taste of her on his tongue. If this was just the beginning, he couldn’t imagine how mad he’d go in the coming moments. “Tell me what you want.”
She clocked it. He wanted her to beg. Anvika wasn’t the begging type. She may have been far removed from having sex, but she always got her way, especially with Lewis. Her hands trailed down the muscular planes of his stomach. Her fingers hooked in his belt and pulled him forward. Her fingers curled around his neck and her nails toyed with the faded hair there. She brought her smeared lips to his ear, her tongue dancing against the shell of it. He shudder. “I want you to make my legs shake and rock my world. Can you do that, Lewis?” 
Her voice. The way her voice dropped in octave but increased in seduction had his head spinning. There were a few moments of silence as he fought hard to gather himself and the more she spurred him on, the most difficult it became. But then, she heard it, “Yes…”
-
“Right there, right there! Oh my…” He was a lover of music. Being in a studio, creating melodies to go with lyrics, was his favorite pastime. But this took the cake. She created her a song better than he could have ever imagined, and was it addicting. 
Her moans, cries, and screams were melodic and his name was the only lyric she knew. He hated repetition in music, but loved hearing hers. So addicting. So well created. So beautiful. 
Her legs trembled around his head and her hands were buried in his braids. He fought the urge to bend her over when she whispered out the faintest, “Baby, please…” She’d used terms of endearment before, but in this context, it was different. “I’m close!”
Her body, damp with sweat and covered in bruises created by his mouth, jumped and jolted as she grew closer to her peak. Lewis sat up, replacing his tongue with his highly skilled fingers. He used his arm to stabilize his body as he hovered over her. What a sight.
Her hair was completely sweated out, pooped and frizzy at the roots. Her makeup stained the pillows and her lips were swollen from her biting and his intense kisses. Her neck was dark with love bites. Her eyelids were hooded but he could see the fire behind her eyes. If only he could capture her and keep the picture in his pocket forever. 
“Doing so well for me,” he whispered, kissing against her cheek and jaw. His fingers made quick work of the huddle of nerves between her legs. “Taking it like a good girl.” Her moans grew louder, higher in pitch, and full of air. It was becoming too much—her hands pushed against his arm, trying to run. “Don’t run now. Isn’t this what you wanted?” 
“Lewis, I’m—“ she cut herself off with a high pitched scream that seemed to ring on forever. Lewis chuckled lightly and worked her through her orgasm. “That’s it, baby.” Her body shook as she tried to come down calmly.
He spent a few minutes between her legs, caressing her gently as an act of comfort. Her loud noises had diminished to soft whimpers as she came down from cloud nine. When she finally opened her eyes again, he asked, “You okay?” 
She was better than okay. Though they didn’t cross all the lines, Anvika had gotten the best orgasm she’d received in her life from a man’s mouth and hands. She’d deal with the consequences later, but in that moment, she felt amazing. 
She nodded and smiled lazily. “I’m okay. Are you…do you want me to…?” Her eyes fell to the evident bulge that strained against his pants. He shook his head.
“I’m okay. Let’s get you cleaned up…”
-
What was supposed to be a shower to clean her up resulted in her on her knees giving him the most intense release he’d experienced in months. It left him panting, shaking, and whimpering like it was his first time all over again. 
Once again, she looked angelic with her now curly hair flat against her back and big brown eyes staring at him as she worked him like the expert she was. He came in her with with a groan, his fingers in her hair. She stood to her feet, smiling innocently as she showed him there was no remnant of him left in her mouth. 
“You’re nasty,” he announced, grabbing her jaw to place a sloppy kids on her lips. 
“Mhmmm, just the way I like it.” 
They migrated to her bed shortly after, laying together in a comfortable silence. Anvika’s head was against his bare chest and herfingers traced the tattoos on his body. Lewis’ arm was around her waist and his hand massaged her plump bottom. 
They were tired, exhausted even. But, they fought sleep like children, internally afraid of what the morning would bring. All actions had consequences whether good or bad. It was a mutual hope that what they’d done wouldn’t bring on the latter. 
“Lewis?” Anvika called after some time. 
“Yes, angel?” 
“Are we gonna be okay?” Her voice trembled slightly. They’d crossed a line--a big one. She had wobbled on her boundaries. There was a lot to discuss and a lot to consider. It was an amazing experience, she couldn’t lie, but her biggest fear was that she’d lose him as an important person in her life if reality didn’t set in the way they intended. 
Lewis gave her a squeeze and brought his lips to her forehead. Sensing her worry, he reassured, “We’ll always be okay.” And she believed it.
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monayen ¡ 10 months ago
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huge fan !!!
i made an ao3 account just to give you more kudos lol
if its okay, can i request for some headcanons for Luther? dating him/being his pet specifically, but i go so feral for how you write him that im sure anything you write will be amazing
have an amazing day 😭🙏💞
Pet/Girlfriend headcannons | Luther Von Ivory
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➷ Paring - Luther Von Ivory x Fem!Reader [Randal's Friends / Ranfren]
➷ CWs - master/pet play, use of 'sir', unsafe sex, clothed sex, fingering, possessive/controlling tendencies, praise, overstimulation, isolation as a form of punishment, domestication kink (?), breeding kink, use of German words (translations provided) he is ur boyfinrd
a/n - AH cheesing that you like my work, thank you for supporting me :3 !! Luther is definitely my sweetheart... so cute... i love writing for him... as always requests are open friends !
Luther Von Ivory… such a nice guy!
Whether you consider yourself his pet or girlfriend, (why not both?) he will always make sure to take care of you
✽ Trust that he will spoil you.
New clothes, new gifts, new everything!
Makes really good use of his everything catalog subscription
He won't willingly say that you are spoiled, that's favoritism! He cares for all his family, you're just a very good pet/girlfriend! (despite everybody knowing it)
✽ Every morning, he chooses your outfit
He makes sure to lay it all out for you out on his vintage dresser, showing multiple options before he ultimately decides on one
Luther’s favorite thing to dress you in?
Skirts, skirts, skirts! A couple cute dresses here and there – but wow does he go crazy for skirts!
There's just something so lovely about them; how the waistband perfectly hugs the curve of your waist, how it exposes your sweet thighs for him whenever you do chores around the house, how easy it is to slide his large hands under…
Luther also really likes clothed sex. He appreciates skin to skin but scheiße (language!) is it a sight to see you all messy in the clothes he got just for you
✽ Tracks EVERYTHING
Have you eaten? Brushed your teeth? Did you do your chores? What room are you going to? What did Sebastian just say to you?
He wants to know it ALL
Your business is basically his business. When you're a couple, it's important there are no secrets!
Even has a little notebook consisting of your daily doings and schedule
Trust that it's to keep you safe and healthy, he truly does care about you a lot. More than you’ll ever think
✽ He's very big on discipline
He expects you to behave and listen… like a good pet!
It’s easy to imagine Luther as a brat tamer, which he can be, though the novelty wears off for him if you continue to be difficult
So, it's much preferred if you just listen to him
✽ It goes hand in hand with domestication
Girlfriend or pet, he still holds you to that standard of taking care of yourself and the house
Wifey behavior – if you must
Luther just loves to see you on your hands and knees… scrubbing the floor, of course!
✽ Adores using pet names and honorifics.
He likes to call you pet, but he finds calling you dear and geliebte (beloved) much more endearing
Call him Sir or Master and he loses it! It's so cute coming from you, he’ll make you say it hundreds of times and cause you to lose your voice
Don’t worry, he always has tea ready to soothe you with later :)
✽ You guys are attached at the hip
Moreso, he keeps you there
You both share his room, sleep in the same bed, wake up at the same times, do everything together!
It's impossible to do anything without him hovering around you
Isn't sneaky at all... it's easy to spot him staring at you through a tiny sliver of an opened door
"Don't worry, dear. Just checking up on you. Keep doing what you're doing."
It’s exactly how he wants it. Bonding is very important, don't go thinking otherwise
✽ It's safe to say that he gets very possessive
He knows you won't ever leave, he's made sure of it by convincing you of how lost you’d be without him
He’s had Randal tell you terrible stories of monsters and freaks, just so you can run into his arms
“Outside pets don't last long,” he tells you. “You're much safer staying by my side, okay?”
Luther makes you nod and promise that you won't ever leave him
He gives you everything a good little human pet needs, so why would you?
So unlike his catmen or even Randal, he rarely ever lets you outside the house
The world can be dangerous, and he’d much prefer to keep you in the “controlled” environment that is the Ivory house
Right where he can keep his eyes on you.
✽ Dates tend to consistently be on the Ivory property
Again, he loves spending time with you!
Luther totally does make that effort to plan dates with you, he'll dress up in his nicest dress shirt and help you pick out a cute dress and do your hair<3
Then, he'll hold your hand and give you your favorite flowers, complimenting you like he didn't help you get ready
He plans out nice activities for you two, something you can spend hours doing... he wants you by his side for all of it
Favorites are: reading books in the study room, cooking dinner together, watching tv for hours as you lay your head in his lap (with petting, obviously), and gardening
Can anything be considered a date if you are constantly together in the same space?
On the rare occasions Luther lets you out with him, he likes to take you shopping! Just don't be greedy and ask for too much…
Either that or drive in movie theaters. Simpler the better.
He has you home by 10 pm (what a gentleman!)
✽ Like I said in my last post about Luther, he is very intimate
Everything is a process when it comes to sex with him
He usually prefers to lie you down on his king bed, thin lips trailing down your collarbone
Let him hold you just a little closer, hands slipping underneath the cute panties he bought you
His long fingers always tease – even if he doesn't intend to
Luther just wants to hear your soft moans, urging him to do more
He’ll shush you, but he doesn't actually want you to be quiet. It's more to comfort you – to say that it's okay, Luther will take care of you now, dear<3
He likes to tell you what to do, as if you don't already know
Luther tends to almost treat you like a lost baby animal, petting at your hair and whispering sweet nothings as he unbuckles his dress pants above you
Once you envelop his lengthy cock, he always makes sure to kiss at your forehead as he pushes in inch by inch. You poor thing, he is quite big… you take it so well for him
Luther doesn't tend to moan or grunt, but he makes sure to let you know how great it is with praises of good girl and so perfect, meine süße (my sweet)
His pace stays slow and deep, hips thrusting rhythmically as he listens to your pleasure and reactions
It's maybe a little crazy how he knows exactly all the spots to have you blushing and squirming under him
Luther isn’t a fan of mess, considering how neat of a person he is
So expect him coming inside a lot, totally not because he has a breeding kink…
Either way, It always ends with him matching your orgasm with his, how cute is it to finish together!
There's purpose and intention behind his every movement, it shows just how much he loves and cares about you. How you are his<3
✽ Though, he could always be a lot rougher if he deems it necessary… i.e, you misbehaving
He's trained you properly that it rarely happens but when it does…
His strong grip will pin your shoulders back, Luther then wedges between your spread legs as his (surprisingly) skilled fingers rub at your clit
You writhe, gasps loudly escape you as he soon ten folds the overwhelming sensation by filling you with his cock.
He purposely tries to overstimulate you, hips snapping roughly against your soft thighs as his thumb rubs at your swollen clit, drawing out shaky moans from you
“It’s too much… isn't it, pet?” Luther says lowly, the contrast is clear as day to his typical sensual doings
“Ah– please, slow down! I can't–!” He hums at your cries, shaking his head and choosing to angle himself to hit your g-spot
“You know better, haustiere (pet). Will you behave for me?”
He’ll make certain that you understand that there is no disobeying him, if it takes plowing you into his silky bed sheets over and over again… so be it
“Yes, sir! I’m sorry– I’ll behave. I promise!”
Ah, such music to his ears to hear you proclaim your compliance.
He’ll lead you to repeat yourself a few more times, each time going faster and faster as the words draw shaker and shaker from your mouth. Just so you really understand :)
✽ A good thing is that he won't ever harm you
Unless… you actually try to escape. You’d never do that to him though! You guys love each other too much!
Besides overstimulating you until you cry and pass out, his other punishments can include isolation
He’ll lock you in his room for days to a couple weeks (depending on the crime), making sure you get no contact with anyone else. Not even the rest of the family
If you don't lose your mind like that, you are sure to when he takes away your privileges of using the internet/watching tv, reading books, drawing.... basically anything that could take your mind off of what you have done
By the end of it, he wants you on your knees begging for forgiveness
And the ever kind humanoid he is, he’ll wipe the cute tears off your red face and pet your hair to comfort you
“It’s okay, geliebte. I hope you have learned your lesson.”
He knows it's harsh, but training is important for pets. How else do you learn?
If you're going to be the future bearer of his children… he needs you to be on your best behavior :)
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droaxa ¡ 2 months ago
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ooouuuuu please give us more nerd boy, he's just too cute for his own good 🤲🤲🤲
tags: nerd x reader pt. 2
warnings: insecurity (on nerd's part), fluff!
a/n: hey guys! i’m back after a long due break and im finally ready to write something cute 😋 hope you guys enjoy!!
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After a few stressful exams, your finals season was almost coming to an end. Well, it would have been if not for that pesky biology exam, the very last one left for you to knock down before you could kick back and truly relax for winter break.
That is how you ended up frazzled, sitting at your cluttered desk. Mountains of worksheets and notes are spread across the desk for easy accessibility and your computer is sitting on top of it all, a video explaining a difficult subject and how to approach problems that may confuse you. However, even with all these resources you were still frustrated, you'd been sitting here for how long? Almost 2 hours and the concept was still just out of reach for you.
You huffed and pushed yourself off your well-loved swivel chair, opting to plop down onto your welcoming bed for a deserved break. Ending up on your phone, you called Nerd, asking him to come over. 'It's a double whammy' you thought, 'I can finally see him again and get this ridiculous topic over. Ugh, he's so smart. You groaned in both envy and admiration, how could someone be so intelligent and adorable?
Less than 15 minutes later you heard a soft knock on your door, there was only one person who knocked like they would hurt the door if they did it any harder. Jumping up on your feet you borderline ran to the door, quickly fixing your hair before you swung it open with the same bright smile you always greet him with. And wow. Did he look good.
His usual glasses were perched on his handsome features, but other than that everything else was different. His usually messy hair was somewhat pushed back, more in a hurry than anything intentional it seemed. Dark grey sweats and a black shirt that hugged his figure so well were his outfit this time around, you could see his expensive-looking watch peeking out of his sweatpant pocket where his hand was situated. He ditched his hoodie this time around and you got a good view of his lean muscle, a body built from discipline as it seemed.
If it wasn't for the sheepish smile on his face you would've thought this was a totally different person, not your Nerd. You invite him in, complementing his appearance with a playful punch as you walk him to your room, he hides his warm face by pretending to cough but you can see his smile peak out under his arm. Cute. You lead him in and pull up another chair next to yours, however, you notice his arms: goosebumps litter the entirety of it.
"You want a hoodie? You look cold" you ask, a little concern discernable in your voice.
He looks up, clearly embarrassed, "I'd really appreciate that yeah"
You shoot him a quick smile and dig through your closet to find a hoodie that would fit him. Aw, he was so cute, did he want to show off to you? After your search, the only item of clothing you could find for him was your ex's hoodie. Huh, that was weird, you could've sworn you had gotten rid of this. You shrug off the feeling and bring out the hoodie for him, only to find him concentrated on your notes.
Eyebrows furrowed, head resting on his hand, his other arm resting on the table. You sneak up behind him and whisper a quiet 'boo' in his ear, making him yelp and turn around only for him to find you giggling.
"Got the hoodie" you announced, holding the article out in front of you as if proof.
"Oh thanks, that's- wait. Is that your dad's?" He instantly recognized the hoodie, it was a men's and totally out of your style range. So, who did it belong to?
You shake your head no and he inquires further.
"Brother or maybe like... cousin?"
Again you shake your head no, "Nope, it's an ex's. Thought I got rid of it, guess not"
Almost immediately after you said 'ex', Nerd's face soured. "Oh- um ok." You could almost hear the insecurity in his voice as he processed that you still kept items that your past lovers had given you.
You immediately recognized his tone and chucked the hoodie out of sight, opting to sit on the desk in front of him instead. He looked up at you, puppy dog eyes turned up to the max and a delicious pout on his downturned lips. You could devour him right here. You reached out for his face and held his cheek in your right hand, he immediately leaned into the gentle touch desperate for comfort. You gave him a soft smile and stroked his face with your thumb while still holding his cheek.
"I swear I meant to throw it out forever ago, honest" You offered.
He just sighed and looked down at his hands, "It's not you, I just- You've experienced all these firsts, all these special moments with someone else. I guess I'm just afraid that I won't be able to impress you and I'll end up being just another guy in your past."
As he lets out his inner feelings, you stare at his downturned face, a cluster of different emotions inside you. "Look at me," You say in a gentle tone and he finally looks up, eyes irritated from holding back tears. Your gaze softens further and you take his whole face into your hands, "It doesn't matter how many experiences I have, the best ones I've ever had were with you. Not my ex, not anyone else, you. You're the best I've ever had, even if you don't think you are, you are to me."
He finally fully meets your eyes, "You.. mean that?" You just nod, a soft smile on your visage. He looked like his breath was stolen from his lungs and he could only muster a small smile. After a moment of hesitation, he leaned upwards toward your face, his intentions clear. You met him halfway, soft lips rushing to yours as your hands wandered into his hair. After a drawn-out yet sweet kiss, you slid down, off the desk, and onto his lap to get closer to him.
After a few more heated kisses you pulled away from each other and the smile returned to his face, no it was more of a grin. "Whatever did I do in a past life to deserve you" he wondered out loud, seemingly captivated by you. "I could say the same" you shot back playfully, hands still on the back of his head. He pulled you closer, keeping you nestled on his lap and against his chest. You felt his heartbeat, fast.
This guy had to be your soulmate.
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