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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 3 months ago

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By: Bernadette Allen

Published Nov 10, 2024

Around 30 women gathered in Belfast on Saturday to highlight concerns about a lack of support for male victims of domestic violence.

The march was made up of women wearing fluorescent pink and included relatives of men who have been the victims.

The twin daughters of west Belfast man Tony Browne, who was murdered by his girlfriend in 2022, were among those who attended.

Bobbi-Leigh and Shannon McIlwaine say there “isn’t enough support services for men” who are going through domestic abuse relationships.

'Extremely hard for a man to come forward'

Mr Browne, 54, was at his home when he was stabbed to death by Wiktoria Maksymowicz.

Bobbi-Leigh said her dad didn’t tell any of his family members what was happening.

“He told one of his closest friends but made his friend promise not to tell me and my sister because he didn’t want anyone to know,” she added.

The death of her father has had a "huge impact" on her, said Bobbi-Leigh.

"There is not one day I’m not thinking about my dad and what he went through and thinking if it could have been prevented," she said.

“It’s extremely hard for a man to come forward and say that he is being abused. There is a chance he won’t be believed, he will be laughed at.

“Women coming out today to speak for men, that’s sending a powerful message. It shows we believe them and support them. There needs to be more support from Stormont.”

[ West Belfast man Tony Browne was murdered by his girlfriend Wiktoria Maksymowicz in 2022 ]

The march was facilitated by the Men’s Alliance NI who are calling for a men’s refuge in Northern Ireland and more support from Stormont.

In a statement, Stormont ministers said they have made it clear that domestic and sexual abuse transcends boundaries of gender, age, sexual orientation, and ethnicity.

They have stressed their commitment to creating a society in Northern Ireland where domestic and sexual abuse are not tolerated, and where victims receive the support they need and where those responsible are held to account.

The Department of Health also said it provides funding for a 24-hour Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline, which is a confidential, freephone service available to any person impacted by domestic and sexual abuse in NI.

[ Around 30 women gathered in Belfast calling for more support ]

Shannon feels a men’s refuge is needed.

“If my dad had have been able to go somewhere it may have given him the courage to leave,” she said.

“It’s important that people come out today and show their support because domestic abuse isn’t a gendered issue and it needs to stop being stigmatised as a gendered issue.”

'Nowhere to go'

Carey Baxter from Men’s Alliance says domestic violence is a societal issue.

“Today is a women’s only march and women are doing this on behalf of men.

“We speak to men who are living in their cars or sofa surfing because they have nowhere to go."

Mr Baxter said there is a huge gap in funding and services for men.

“It’s not about taking services away from women, it’s about finding something extra for the men because those services are needed and we hear it every single day of the week in our support groups, but there is nothing there for them.”

#Northern Ireland #Bernadette Allen #Tony Browne #Men’s Alliance NI #Men’s Alliance #male victims #male victims of domestic violence #male victims of domestic abuse #domestic abuse #domestic violence #intimate partner violence #male victims of intimate partner violence #violent women #female abusers #religion is a mental illness

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hellyeahscarleteen · 3 months ago

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Some Important Help Resources for Those in the United States

We want to make sure that you know about -- and share -- some more safe direct help resources available on Scarleteen and elsewhere, as well as some content on our site that might now or soon be particularly relevant to you if you live in the United States:

These images include the following resources:

Direct Help Resources That Don't Call the Police:

Call Blackline: 800.604.5841 (centers BI&POC)

Deaf IGNITE at Willow Domestic Violence Center: 585.348.7233

Domestic Violence Support: thehotline.org

DEHQ: 908.367.3374 (centers the South Asian community)

LGBT National Help Center: 888.843.4564

Scarleteen: Text 206.866.2279 or visit scarleteen.com/ask

StrongHearts Native Helpline: 844.762.8483 (centers Native Americans and Alaska Natives.

Thrive Lifeline: Text “THRIVE” to 313.662.8209 (trans-led text-based support line centering marginalized communities)

Trans Lifeline: 877.565.8860

Abortion Resources:

Pregnancy Support:

All-Options Talkline: 1.888.493.0092

Scarleteen: Text 206.866.2279 or visit scarleteen.com/ask

If You Need an Abortion:

Plan C: www.plancpills.org

Aid Access: aidaccess.org

I Need An A: ineedana.com

Abortion Funds:

National Network of Abortion Funds: abortionfunds.org

Support Before, During, or After Abortion:

Hesperian: The Safe Abortion App

Dopo Co-Op: wearedopo.com (abortion doulas)

Exhale Pro-Voice: Text 617.749.2948 or visit exhaleprovoice.org (focuses on post-abortion support)

Miscarriage & Abortion Hotline: Call or text +1.833.246.2632 or visit mahotline.org

Scarleteen: Text 206.866.2279 or visit scarleteen.com/ask

Legal Support:

Repro Legal Helpline: 844.868.2812

To Identify and Avoid Crisis Pregnancy Centers:

crisispregnancycentermap.com

Content at Scarleteen That May Help:

Rebel Well: A Starter Guide to a Trumped America

The Scarleteen Safety Plan

How to Access a Safe, Self-managed Medical Abortion

Abortion and Digital Privacy: How to Protect Ourselves

Self-care Amidst a Deluge of Anti-trans Legislation

You can also always use Scarleteen’s direct services to get one-on-one, tailored help (always by people, never AI) or to get help finding additional resources. ❤️

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freakingholland · 1 month ago

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I need some fluffy Remus x f! Reader. Reader is a need-of-touch Person, plagued by the similar issues like Remus (insecurity/ anxiety, lack of self esteem, feeling of not deserving love & happiness, depression, and can be impulsive). History of bullying at school, family issues (fighting parents, mean relatives). On a very hard hitting depression day, Remus learns of her troubles, a friendship develops. Both afraid to „ruin“ it with their feelings. A deep cuddle part :)? Thank you very much!

"Let's stop pretending" - Remus Lupin x teacher!Reader

A/N: Hello! Thank you sm for this request! You didn’t specify if you want it to be older or younger Remus so I went with teacher Remus and teacher Reader – I hope you don’t mind! I loved working on this piece and I hope you’ll like it! Also this was my first time writing something so emotional so please go easy on me!

If you or anyone you know is struggling please consider seeking help. Here are some extremely helpful hotlines: 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988 (US) STAND! For Families Free of Violence crisis line: 888-215-5555 (US) National Domestic Abuse Helpline in the UK: 0808 2000 247 (UK) Crisis Services Canada Suicide Prevention Service: 1-833-456-4566 (Canada) Remember, you are not alone and things can get better. Virtual hugs - Tori xx

Summary: Sometimes the most influential people, the closest to one’s heart, get the worst of treatments. But true love will always shine through the toughest of times. And that’s what happened with Remus and his partner. (emotional hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending, romance)

Warnings: not proofread! descriptions of low self esteem, depressive mood, descriptions of anxiety and worries, heartfelt confessions, teacher x teacher relationship.

Word count: 1.7K +

If you enjoyed my work: Ko-fi.com/freakingholland

questions/requests/ideas here! - rules here

masterlist

my AO3 archive is here

Sweaty, breathless. With a knot painfully tightening in your stomach. With an unrested mind, thoughts colliding with one another and blurring together. Was it the weight of your new function? Was it the memories of your own school years? The taunts, the whispers, the isolation - all of it suddenly felt too close, like it had never really left. But you shook your head, forcing yourself to breathe. In and out.

You were safe now—or so you told yourself. On the other side. Teaching, not being taught.

A bottle of water, your beloved quill, some chocolate, books. You nervously clutched your most needed belongings with trembling hands. You hurriedly skipped up the stairs towards your newly assigned classroom keeping your things close to your torso.

As you were approaching the top of the staircase you were greeted with a small smile from a man walking downstairs. One that you couldn’t help but return despite the tightness in your chest. A fellow professor – judging by the look of his robe. He was wearing a sweater that at first sight seemed just as soft as his gaze. His soft facial expression and scent briefly shook you from your overwhelming thoughts.

“Good morning.” he said calmly. You stopped in your tracks.

“I feel like we know each other,” you said hesitantly, forcing yourself to hold his gaze. “Y/N Y/L/N.”

He nodded gently, with a spark of recognition behind his ocean blue eyes.

“Hmmm we do… it’s been so long. Good to see a familiar face. Remus. Remus Lupin.”

“It really has been. Nice to see you too,” you replied, a weird sense of relief creeping in.

Remus Lupin. Of course you remembered him. He had been a well-seasoned fifth year student by the time you had started your first term at Hogwarts. Though you’d never really spoken directly, you were aware of him. Your paths crossed briefly when you were a prefect for Ravenclaw at a time of his own prefect duties for Gryffindor.

You loved being a prefect, it had been a rare reprieve. It gave you an excuse to roam around the castle, to lose yourself in the beauty of it. While many younglings found the darkness of Hogwarts unsettling, to you it was a genuine comfort, a place where you could gather your racing thoughts in peace.

“I’m sure we will see each other more often. My class is just around the corner. If you need anything dear you know where to find me.” He tilted his head in the direction of the stairs.

“Now if you’ll excuse me ma’am! I have to sign some documents at Mrs. McGonagall’s office. We shall see each other later?”

“Certainly. See you later Remus.”

It was hard not to admit that his warm welcome caught you off guard. What surprised you was that, despite having barely interacted in the past, he seemed to hold some sense of fondness towards you. Regardless, his gesture was undeniably kind.

You and Professor Burbage sat side by side, your mugs of coffee warming your hands as you exchanged stories about the last week’s antics from your lessons.

“…and then he- “you began, only to be interrupted by a familiar warmth on your shoulder.

“And who is that?” a familiar voice teased from behind.

Remus peeked between you and Professor Burbage with his very own cup of coffee.

“Good evening, Remmy. Please have a seat!”

“May I?” he asked without really waiting for an answer before pulling up a chair.

As Remus sat down, his knee brushed yours briefly under the table.

“You’re like two peas in a pod these days,” Burbage commented, her eyes darting between you with a knowing grin.

“What can I say dear Charity…?” Remus began, his tone mockingly serious.

“You have to have somebody to complain to when you’re marking awfully written papers.” You finished for him.

“Exactly. Out of respect for our sanity, of course.”

“Oh, is that what they’re calling it these days?” she asked.

Remus raised an eyebrow, but his smirk gave him away. “Yes, that’s precisely what we’re calling it. Survival through shared suffering.”

“Mhmm, shared suffering,” Charity said under her breath before taking a long sip of her coffee. She glanced at her watch.

“Well well I’d love to banter with you for a little longer but some of us have lessons to prepare for. Good night,” she said, slowly rising from her seat. She gently smoothed out her robe.

“Goodnight, Charity,” you said, trying to ignore the subtle heat spreading through your cheeks.

You were moving rice from one edge of your plate to another, trying to make it vanish with your sight.

“You’re awfully quiet today,” Remus said, breaking the silence.

Forcing a smile, you replied, “It’s nothing, just tired.” He gave you an attentive look and nodded slowly.

“Dearie if you need to talk, you know I’m here,” he said gently.

„I know, thank you…”

Your rational side begged you to stop, to bury the feelings before they ruined what you had. But your heart had other ideas. It kept slowly but surely tearing you apart with unrelenting tension, increasing with every single one of Remus’ gestures, remarks.

His hand had barely brushed against yours, and it was enough to fuel the ache in your chest. You wanted to lean into the warmth he offered, wanted to let the comfort of his company wrap around you like a blanket, but you simply couldn’t.

You could feel the weight of his gaze on you. You needed to leave. Needed some space.

“I... I must…go set up the classroom.” You said firmly getting up from your warmed up seat.

As you stepped into the hallway the cold air hit your face, making you more focused on your breathing. The feeling was sort of like the one on your first day teaching. Except this time you were walking away from him, the one person who had brought you so much comfort. With each step, you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were letting something so important slip right through your fingers.

You slammed the door behind you, taking out your anger on the object. You couldn’t help but cry it all out. You slid down to the floor and buried your face between your knees.

Remus couldn’t stand it any longer. He set down his mug with a thud and followed you.

He hesitated for a moment, but the instinct to check on you was stronger than the quiet voice in his head telling him to stay away. Gently pushing the door open, he found you, sitting on the cold stone floor next to it.

He sat down beside you without a word. The silence was growing thicker if that was even possible.

“I don’t deserve this Y/N…” he whispered, his voice trembling.

“You are right…you don’t deserve such treatment, “ you whispered back.

“I... I don’t know what’s happening anymore, Remus,” you choked out, your shoulders shaking. “Everything feels like it's falling apart, and I can’t keep pretending it’s fine.”

“That is not what I meant love.” He locked his gaze with yours, eyes glistening in the warm sunlight. He took a deep breath.

“I don’t deserve someone like you. I’ve spent so long convincing myself that I shouldn’t get close to anyone, and yet… here you are. Without even trying, you’ve become everything to me.” His voice wavered.

“You’ve brought light into places I thought would stay dark forever.”

“I’ve hidden from who I really am… from what I’ve been through. I convinced myself that I wasn’t worthy of any of the good things, especially not you.” His words made your chest tighten.

“But you are worthy, Remus. You’re the most caring person I know. I wouldn’t have survived being here if it wasn’t for your constant support. I owe you the beginning of this chapter of my life.”

He looked down, his voice quiet as he murmured, “I don’t know how to accept that. I don’t know how to feel like I’m enough for you.”

“Please don’t say that.”

“I have to be honest with you, Remus. I don’t know how to just be your friend anymore. I’ve tried, but I can’t keep pretending I don’t feel the way I do.” Your voice cracked, and you turned away, wrapping your arms around yourself.

“I never thought… I never dared to believe you could feel the same,”

“I’ve spent so much time telling myself you were out of reach,” he continued.

He paused, his hand hovering uncertainly before finally brushing gently against your cheek, as if afraid you might pull away. “I need to say this, Y/N. It’s been eating at me for weeks now, and I can’t keep pretending it’s not there.”

“I think I’m in love with you.”

You turned to face him. More tears welled up in your eyes. But this time they were happy tears.

Without thinking, you closed the space between you, wrapping your arms tightly around him. His embrace was immediate.

“I’ve tried to ignore it... but the more I’m with you, the more it’s hard to deny. I love you too,” you murmured into his chest, your voice muffled. “I’ve loved you for so long.”

As he held you close, the world felt like it had finally righted itself.

You soaked in the relief. And the warmth that seemed like it was completely out of your reach just seconds ago.

You stayed intertwined for a while, slowly digesting the good and the bad. Giving yourself space to let everything sink in.

But then, as the two of you sat there in silence for a while, Remus shifted slightly and let out a soft chuckle.

“You know,”

“as romantic as this moment is, my buttocks are absolutely freezing.” You couldn’t help but laugh through the remains of your tears.

“Oh, so now you’re saying my breakdown spot isn’t up to your standards?” you teased, pulling back just enough to see his face, which was now decorated with a playful smirk.

“I’m just saying, if we’re going to spend the night clinging to each other and crying some more maybe we could do it somewhere else. My butt’s about to become part of the stonework here… have some mercy for an old man.”

“I will as long as I am allowed to call you my old man.”

“I suppose I could let you get away with that... but only because I’m feeling generous.” Remus grinned, planting a kiss on your forehead.

Thank you for reading! Stay whelmed xx

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creature-wizard · 1 year ago

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"I'm in a bad place and need to get out, what can I do?"

I figured I'd make a post with all the resources/tips I've collected to help people get out of shitty situations so far, since it's easier than linking to a bunch of posts each time.

Seek out appropriate resources. This can include support groups (online or offline), helplines, and the like.

If you're in the US, you can call 211 to help you find resources.

Crisis Text Line offers services to the US, Ireland, Canada, and the UK.

RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) is a US service offers a lot of information for sexual abuse survivors.

The Trevor Lifeline is a service for queer youth in the US.

If you're a minor, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Minors.

If you're an adult, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Adults.

You might search on Qwant for like something like "resources for people in abuse" or "abuse resources help" or "domestic violence survivors resources".

Ask people for help in finding resources. If you can't find anything on your own, there are other people who know where to direct you. It might take awhile to find what you're looking for, but keep asking.

A WORD OF CAUTION: there are many predatory spiritual groups and conspiracy theorists out there who prey on abuse survivors and mentally ill people. You will often see these people claiming that channeling or hypnosis can help you remember past life memories or repressed traumatic memories. This is nonsense and quackery.

Relevant posts of mine:

Hypnosis is unreliable for memory recovery, and this is one way we know.

False past life memories among the starseed movement

Here’s the trouble with hypnotic regression…

If you're on a website that claims to support cult survivors and you see any of these names in the citations (and make sure you check the citations!), leave immediately - all of these people are far right conspiracy theorists. (Unfortunately, many people today are unwittingly perpetuating the BS of Fritz Springmeier in particular. See this and this for more info on that.)

Change who and what you surround yourself with. Start associating with different people/groups as much as you can. Get hobbies to fill your time. Unfollow blogs that reinforce the beliefs you're trying to get away from, and follow blogs that provide a healthier alternative.

You might follow blogs like:

A Kind Place

Trauma Survivors Helping Trauma Survivors

Compassionate Reminders

Trauma Survivors Activities

Reasons For Hope

Bluest Fluff

If you're trying to rebuild your worldview without conspiratorial/culty elements, go take a look at my Resources page.

Remember that your first job is looking after yourself. You don't owe the group. You aren't responsible for the group, or for anyone in it. It might feel that way, but it's vitally important to acknowledge when you're unqualified or suffering burnout. You might feel like bad things will happen if you leave, but that's a fear, not a fact.

You also don't have to justify your departure to the group. You can just leave. If you feel that you must give a reason, you can offer something as simple as "I need to take some time to focus on my mental health" or "I'm really busy lately and don't have time to spend here." If they throw a fit over this, that's honestly just more proof that you need to get out.

If any practices the group taught you actually helped, you can keep doing them. If doing affirmations helped you, keep doing affirmations. If listening to so-called healing frequencies actually made you feel better, you don't have to stop listening to them. If you were practicing something like the Law of Assumption, you can carry on with a lot of that under a psychological model rather than Neville Goddard's wacky metaphysical model. (See this video for an example.) If it genuinely helps you and doesn't hurt anyone else, by all means, keep doing it.

You might look at my Manifestation Without Woo posts:

Manifestation Without Woo: Changing Your Brain

Manifestation Without Woo: People React To Your Projections, & Your Projections Affect Your Perceptions

Manifestation Without Woo: Setting Reasonable Goals

Manifestation Without Woo: Make It Fun!

Manifestation Without Woo: What If It's Not Working?

Get some critical thinking skills. In order to keep yourself from falling into another bad group, it's important to develop your critical thinking skills.

Learn to apply the Five W's (who, what, when, where, and why) when encountering any information.

Learn common logical fallacies.

Learn the difference between fact, opinion, belief, and prejudice.

Don't equate emotional reactions with some kind of innate or higher moral guidance.

Ask yourself if you're "thinking for yourself" or being led to believe you're thinking for yourself.

Know what emotional manipulation tactics look like.

Watch out for these behaviors in any new group you join.

Yes, there are ways to confirm the age of an old text without having the original text itself.

Learn how propaganda works.

Watch out for these red flags in spiritual groups.

And watch out for this red flag.

Understand that belief doesn't have to be binary.

So yeah, hopefully this'll give folks some actionable advice. I can't promise it's going to help each and every person out there, but hopefully it'll give a lot of you something that will help.

#cult recovery #cults #religious abuse #spiritual abuse #spirituality #resources

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writing-for-life · 20 days ago

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A Message from Katherine Kendall (“Claire”)

From the article:

“It is everyone’s individual choice what to do with Gaiman’s product going forward, but if you want to offer additional support, please consider making a donation to your local rape crisis agency*, or consider a donation to OurVOICE, a rape crisis agency in Asheville, NC.

*If you live in the US and are unsure of the name of your local IPV agency, you can find it using this database.

In 2020, Neil Gaiman committed to making a “hefty donation” to OurVOICE, the agency where I received counseling services in 2013. It was later discovered that he had not made the donation he promised.

I am not professionally affiliated with this agency, but believe strongly in its mission: to inspire hope and healing while ending sexual violence and human trafficking through education, counseling and advocacy.

I am also adding some info for people in the UK if you’d like to support Domestic Abuse or Intimate Partner Violence Helplines/Centres more regional to you, or if you need that support yourself (they usually also have contacts to local centres). Maybe others would like to add something in their countries as well?

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 Scotland: Rape Crisis Scotland, Scotland's Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline or Scottish Women’s Aid (donations and other ways to help here)

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 Wales: Rape Crisis, Live Fear Free or Refuge (donations and other ways to help here)

🇬🇧 Northern Ireland (sorry, there’s still no separate emoji flag): Rape Crisis Northern Ireland, Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline or Nexus (donations and other ways to help via Nexus here)

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 England and whole of UK: Rape Crisis or Refuge (donations and other ways to help here)

Turn your helplessness and anger into something positive that really makes a difference…

#neil gaiman #added info for the uk #women’s helplines #support centres #support women #the sandman #good omens #sandman #friends of calliope #queue crew

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re-dracula · 1 year ago

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Heads up that October 3's episode is very hard to listen to in a few sections! Both Stephen and Tal had to take breaks during audio editing because of the acting. Here are the content warnings and resources that will be in the show notes:

This episode portrays and recounts a horrific assault. It also references the racist pseudoscience of craniometry, and contains a mention of suicide. Transcript here.

This episode may be especially distressing to those who have experienced assault. Don't want to listen to the episode or read the transcript? A summary of events can be found here. We've also provided resources below for those who may need it. Help is available now and you deserve support.

UK Resources: You can call the 24/7 national domestic abuse helpline on 0808 2000 247 and get free confidential advice at www.womensaid.org.uk. If you are over the age of 16, living in England & Wales, and have been affected by any form of sexual violence or abuse, specialist and confidential support is available 24/7 at 0808 500 2222 or 247sexualabusesupport.org.uk.

US Resources: You can call the 24/7 national domestic abuse hotline at 800-799-7233, text "START" to 88788, and get free confidential advice at www.thehotline.org. You can call the national sexual assault hotline for 24/7 confidential support at 800-656-4673 or use their online chat at online.rainn.org.

Information on International Resources can be found at www.domesticshelters.org/resources/national-global-organizations/international-organizations and www.rcne.com/links/sources-of-help-for-survivors/. Resources are not limited to what we have included here!

#re: dracula #dracula daily

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ladylaviniya · 1 year ago

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AVATAR: THE NEW MISSION MASTERLIST

Story Summary: After failing his mission to hunt down Jake Sully, Miles Quaritch is given a new mission. Let’s just say you’re not the most co-operative na’vi native and Quaritch loves to put you in your place.

Story Warnings: 18+ Dead Dove Do Not Eat, Non-Con, Dubious Consent, Manipulation, Age Gap, Colonisation, Bondage, Alien Sex, Pregnancy, Breeding Kink.

Pairing: Recom!Miles Quaritch X Na'vi Reader

Author Notes:

★This story has been published in the past on Tumblr on my old account @milknhonies-old-account since I have created a newer account I am reposting this story here.

★I would like to express the knowledge that I do not approve or perform of any of the actions the characters of this fanficition demonstrate.

★This story might be alarming and severely upsetting for people who have had experiences with rape, colonisation, abuse, traumatic births and mental manipulation.

★If you do not wish to see this content please block #ATNM (scroll and you'll find it is the first tag.)

★This story is not fit for every viewers eyes and it will be glorifying acts of trauma and characters that shouldn't be in reality.

★CHAPTER LIST★

★ Chapter 1 - Word Count: 3k

★ Chapter 2 - Word Count: 4k

★ Chapter 3 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 4 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 5 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 6 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 7 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 8 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 9 - Word Count: tba

★ Chapter 10 - Word Count: tba

★HELPLINES★

If you are a victim of sexual abuse, assault or domestic violence or know someone who is please reach out to these links that share helpline services, phone numbers or emails. Consent and respect is important in every relationship whether between friends, family or even strangers. .

Australian Helpline Services

UK Helpline Services

American Helpline Services

India Helpline Services.

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peppermint-cardboard · 3 months ago

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hey. hello my friend. i am grabbing you by the shoulders oh so gently. do not become hopeless. that is exactly what they want. blue state governments will give them hell over the next presidential term, and you can rest assured there will absolutely be people in our government fighting for democracy.

the thing we can all do that will have the most direct immediate impact and will lay the groundwork for cultures of help, creativity, and love is to get involved at the local community level.

i’m talking especially to my fellow teens here!!! may not be able to vote but that doesn’t mean we’re not able to help.

for my fellow Angelenos!

Hollywood Food Coalition - free food! you can sign up to volunteer and do meal prep (cooking), meal service (serving food), or help at their food bank. locations are on their website. thanksgiving is coming up and HFC will need volunteers!

My Friend’s Place - free aid for youth homelessness, especially queer youth homelessness. volunteering is for 18 years and older

Los Angeles LGBT Center - exactly what it sounds like. offers a wide range of wonderful services and opportunities for volunteering. also works with school GSAs!

Moonwater Farm - a community farm in Compton with great opportunities for education and sometimes paid fellowships

for people everywhere else! just some general recommendations:

The Trevor Project - queer youth services that have saved my ass a number of times. i don’t know if they call the police as part of their responses or not (offers a single-click-to-leave button in case of emergency)

TrevorSpace - a great queer youth-centered website and a very safe place for queer community and discussion

Debate Me, Bro - a great anarchist newsletter/advice column run by a friend of mine!

The Child And Its Enemies - anarchist child rights-focused podcast also run by that same friend of mine :)

Neocities - make a website! learn some HTML! it’s fun, it’s pretty simple, and it’s a way to get a message out if that’s what you want but it’s also just a great de-stresser

Queer Liberation Library - need i even elaborate on the importance of libraries and access to queer media over the coming few years? (offers a single-click-to-leave button in case of emergency)

American Civil Liberties Union - an activism and aid organization that gave the Republicans absolute hell last time and will continue to do so this time

Blackline (800-604-5841) - a crisis and help hotline prioritizing BI&POC and black queer people. will not call the police!

Trans Lifeline (US: 877-565-8860, Canada: 877-330-6366) - a helpline run by and for trans folks. has a quick escape button and will not call the police!

Wildflower Alliance Peer Support Line (888-407-4515) - a warmline to chat with trained therapists and professionals. will not call the police!

StrongHearts Native Helpline (844-762-8483) - a domestic and sexual violence helpline prioritizing Native Americans and Alaska Natives. has a quick escape button and will not call the police!

Thrive Lifeline (313-662-8209) - a live crisis warmline prioritizing marginalized people. also offers text messaging! will not call the police!

LGBT National Health Center (888-843-4564) - exactly what it sounds like! warmlines for queer people if you need help. has a quick escape button and will not call the police!

Transfeminine Science - a fantastic resource for... transfeminine science. exactly what it says on the tin.

Planned Parenthood - an incredibly prolific and important organization that offers a very wide array of vastly important services. if you live in an at least semi-urban city in the U.S., Planned Parenthood probably has a clinic near you. you should find out if they do!!!

please feel free to add more resources if you know any!!

other recommendations: say hi to a neighbor. bake someone a pie. start a garden. treat homeless people like your neighbors (because they are). propose a community movie night. have a party in your apartment building. call a friend. text a friend. draw something. cook something good. go to a restaurant you like. buy some DVDs. get a new stuffed animal. compliment a stranger’s shirt. ask for a hug. offer someone a hug. listen to music. KEEP LIVING!!!!!!!!!

don't just survive, keep living <3

#faye screams at a rock #politics #us politics #mutual aid #socialism #community organizing #social justice #grassroots #queer rights #los angeles #anarchism #?#queer #trans #trans rights

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mariacallous · 3 months ago

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Nighat Dad grew up in a conservative family in Jhang, in Pakistan’s Punjab province. The threat of early marriage hung over her childhood like a cloud. But despite their traditional values, Dad’s parents were determined that all their children get an education, and they moved the family to Karachi so she could complete her bachelor’s degree. “I never really thought I would work, because I was never taught that we could work and be independent,” she says. “We always needed permission to do anything.”

Dad thought a master’s in law might delay the inevitable betrothal, but soon after she completed the course, she found out her parents had arranged a marriage for her. She didn’t mind her new life of domestic chores in a household she describes as “lower-middle class”—that is, until the abuse started. “That’s when my legal education reminded me that this was wrong,” she says. “Our laws, our constitution, everything protects me, so why was I facing this? Why was I tolerating it?”

With her family’s backing, Dad left her husband and filed for divorce. But after years of domestic violence and abuse and with no experience of working, she struggled with a lack of confidence. “I had no idea that women who are divorced and have a child face such difficulties in a society like ours,” she says. When her ex-husband filed a custody case for their 2-month-old baby, Dad wasn’t sure how she would pay for a lawyer. That’s when her father reminded her that she was a lawyer too.

Dad used her degree to win custody of her only child. In the process, she realized how many women in Pakistan were facing years of violence and systemic injustice. But the thing that bothered her most was the digital divide.

Before her marriage, Dad’s family never allowed her access to her own cell phone, and when she finally did get one, her husband would use it as a surveillance tool—keeping track of who she called and who was texting her. She had an escape tool in her hand, but she couldn’t use it. “Going through that by myself made me realize how quickly technology is evolving, and how it’s creating virtual spaces for marginalized communities that might not have access to physical ones,” she says. “Facing those restrictions made me understand just how crucial it is to challenge societal norms and structures around women's access to technology and the internet, so they can use it as freely as men.”

In 2012, Dad established the Digital Rights Foundation, an NGO that aims to address the digital divide and fight online abuse of women and other gender minorities in Pakistan. She began by helping women who reached out to the organization, providing advice on digital safety and emotional and mental support. In 2016—the same year Pakistan finally passed legislation against online crimes—Dad and her team launched a cyber-harassment helpline. Since 2016, it has addressed more than 16,000 complaints from across the country. “Sometimes, the police would give our phone numbers to victims seeking reliable help,” she says.

The DRF’s in-house legal team offers pro bono advice and helps women file and follow-up complaints against their abusers. “In many cases, we were successful in actually getting the perpetrator arrested and taken to trial,” Dad says. In October 2021, the DRF’s legal team helped journalist Asma Shirazi win a landmark case in the Islamabad High Court against broadcaster ARY News, after she became the target of a coordinated troll campaign which was exacerbated by a false story aired on the channel.

“If an organization like the DRF had existed when I was facing my own issues, I would have felt so much more supported—knowing there was someone to guide me legally and help me navigate the complexities,” she says. “My abuse started with surveillance, and if I had someone to talk to back then, I might have avoided the deep depression that followed. I might not have ended up in such a miserable situation.”

Today, Dad and the DRF are helping to steer global conversations about tech policy reform. She recently joined the United Nations’ AI Advisory Board, and was a founder member of Meta’s Oversight Board, which acts as an independent platform for people to appeal decisions made by the social media giant. “The emerging tech space is mostly driven by big Western companies and governments, leaving out civil society NGOs from the Global South,” she says. “This puts us far behind in global AI governance, always playing catch-up in a fast-moving world. If we’re not part of the conversation, the gap just keeps widening. It’s about reminding the powerful that they can’t win this race alone—they have a responsibility to include the rest of the world, especially those without the same resources.”

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