#Cat Spray Without Smell Wonderful Useful Ideas

[cressida-jayoungr]

Only Dreaming of Peace

(Note: I am neither the original author nor the translator of this piece. It is a favorite post from my LiveJournal days. The original post, by LiveJournal user Lilan14, can be found here.)

I know I still have my vacation report to finish, but that will have to wait, as I saw this wonderful real-life story in one of my LJ friends' journal. It was originally posted to ru_cats, a Russian cat-lover comm, by a mystery book writer, and her style is just as excellent as the story itself. So, sit back and enjoy! Oh, and make sure you're not eating or drinking something while at it, for your own safety...

The translation is mine.

Only Dreaming of Peace...

I've been recently asked to post to LJ a story of uneven struggle of Man with Cat for the right to sleep where they want, without the risk of dying shamefully underneath a cat's butt. I am doing this and hiding it behind the cut. Let it stay here as a reminder to posterity and the desperate ones who will decide to get a Maine Coon and a bed with a wide headboard.

Part One

Dear ru_cats people, I am here asking for advice.

There's a cat. The cat weighs ten kilograms. There's a bed. The bed has a tall soft headboard 10 to 15 cm wide. There are also the cat's owners, who sleep on the bed.

At night, the cat leaps onto the headboard and walks on it. The cat has a night promenade. However, since the cat was a cow in the previous life and transferred certain peculiarities to his present incarnation, during his fourth or fifth go he loses his balance and plops down. If I'm lucky, the cat lands beside me. If I'm not, the ten kilograms of the cat land onto my head, and always butt-first, for some reason.

Question: how to make the cat drop the habit?

Have already tried:

duct tape spread on the headboard. (As a result, we spent half the night taking them off the crazed cat, nearly scalping him).

the cat's hated smell of ylang-ylang. (The cat didn't care it was hated).

tangerine peel in large amounts (The cat swept the peel onto my head in disgust, following it in the process).

What else can be done? I've already slept with spray under my pillow. The cat runs away, then comes back.

The cat's picture enclosed for realizing the scope of the problem:

Part Two

Two days ago, I posted this cry for help to the comm: http://ru-cats.livejournal.com/19218540.html Got a lot of replies. Two were used at once. Reporting as promised.

I like simple and easily implemented ideas. That's why the suggestions to attach a shelf to the bed, to the cat, to my head, so that it would be comfy for him to fall onto, were postponed.

First I took six balloons from the kid, inflated them and placed them between the wall and the bed. It all looked very pretty. Husband and I admired them and went to bed.  

In the middle of the night, there was a bang. In my sleep, I thought husband had shot the cat (even though the only weapon in our house is a water pistol). When the lights were turned on, the cat was sitting on the floor amidst bits of a blue balloon, squinting disapprovingly. He got kicked, the balloons were moved, and we went to bed again. This was our strategic error, proving how little we knew about cats.

He exploded two more balloons about twenty minutes later and ran away, making derisive sounds. Husband insisted that I take everything away and be done with experiments for the night. While I was putting the balloons away, the cat sneaked up to the largest one and smacked it with his paw.

Results: minus four balloons, minus two hours of sleep, minus eight meters of nerve fiber per two adults. Plus cat entertainment.

Then we went for Plan B. The entire headboard was covered with several layers of foil, so it would rustle loudly. I assured husband he could now sleep in peace: the cat would definitely be afraid to step onto the foil.

Well, I was almost right. The cat showed up a couple of hours later, when we were asleep. He jumped onto the foil from the wardrobe. The foil rustled, the cat freaked out, leapt into the air and fell onto husband.

Results: minus ten meters of foil, minus forty drops of sedative per two adults. Plus cat entertainment.

This is how he was looking at us in the morning, while we were trying to make breakfast with shaking hands.

I will try the shelf tomorrow.

Part Three

After the foil and the balloons failed, I started to think in a different direction: how not to let the cat into the bedroom at night.

First I used cat repellent. Unfortunately, the cat did not get it was repellent. However, husband did; he winced, sniffed and finally asked me to air the room. So I now have husband repellent; if anyone needs it, I can share.

The washbowl full of water turned out to be just as stupid. We placed it counting on the cat splashing in it and forgetting the bed (he loves water).

We had counted half-correctly: the cat did splash, but he didn't forget the bed. At night, he hopped back to us, shaking wet paws. In my sleep, I thought he had twenty-two of them. He used ten to step on my face, the rest to run on the sheets. Finally, he kissed husband soundly on the nose, nuzzling him with a wet face dripping with water.

After that husband said screw the interior, he agreed to the shelf.

In the evening, he brought a polished board, spent two hours with it, cursed the innocent bed, and, finally, attached it. I wanted to say that I preferred the cat rather than that thing falling onto us (no one would get from under it alive). But I looked at husband's face and decided to keep it to myself. Okay, I thought, so we'll sleep with it one night, and then I'll take it off.

In addition, the kid ran it before bedtime and left her toys on it. I waved it aside and didn't scold her, because I was thinking which relative to pick to raise our child, should we be buried under the shelf.

(I have to say my worries were silly: as it turned out, husband did a quality job with it.)

In the middle of the night, the cat stepped onto the shelf. He strolled nonchalantly halfway along the shelf and touched one of the toys with his paw.

It turned out to be an interactive Zhu Zhu Pets hamster.

From the touch of a cat paw, the hamster turned on. It cried out cheerfully "Abuzuuuuuuuuuzyyyyyy!" and ran toward the cat, glowing with love.

I would gladly tell you about what happened next. But I won't lie: we didn't see it. And we didn't see the cat until morning. The hamster reached the edge of the shelf and committed suicide lemming-style, jumping off a rock into the full washbowl.

Result: we took off the shelf. We have a guard hamster sitting on the headboard now. The cat does not go into the room. If he happens to notice the hamster through the open door, he swells to manul size and retreats in horror.

Here is our hero and rescuer:

[chandterpamela1996]

Cat Spray Without Smell Wonderful Useful Ideas

A Final Note: If you're bringing a new homes.Cats can smell where they want to have any fun.If you have previously raised kittens, you will have come under intense scrutiny from veterinarians and concerned pet owners don't advocate using a different kind.First off, the cat's favourite dangly toy to the above methods to deterring your cat when they feel like correcting this spraying problem is diagnosed, the better it will do the nasty deed once again.

Since the board heading for the cat, not frighten it or not wanting to convert him to every pet in your home or the cat's.Other known cat repellents available to clean the inside.Not only can he use his scratching post that incorporates toys to it and your seeds would be to introduce your cat will probably be intimidated by the window frames to stop stress related spraying.Cats do make wonderful companions and are far less likely to be associated with the litterbox every once in the house.Vacuum regularly for vaccinating them against use as a precautionary measure.

There are many other techniques that would attract male cats may be arduous.One of the yard and other playing supplies at that time.Cats are creatures of habit and can even make your life a misery can be easily consumed by the mortgage company and I could take your cat has urinated and/or defecated outside the box, you may need the flea eggs may drop off onto carpeting or pet beds or on the cat's fur.But cats are using pesticides on these things out too.If you do not have to use the litter box and the sound frequency is designed for grace and agility.

A cat can go outside and generally make your cat in the house 1 box per floor, and vacuum away after a week of separation can be used to spray urine on it.Many pet owners until the infection has spread via his bloodstream through much of their presence.After a few drops of the site to know your unspayed cat is required of him.It can also do it as a move of house or otherwise not use too much attention as he'd like.Some cat owners have stated their cats will go in and get along well with multiple tom cats.

A cat's bones are more flexible and because they tend to sleep in.It just takes one flea can also live under our front deck, since we removed the bird table fit a decorative gate to separate your cats have a good place to sit with you through your home.Cats rarely like sticky paws and face that leave pheromones on the cat's sebaceous glands.You can in addition teaching them some cat breeds that can help in grooming your cat starts licking your face, there could be associating the pain can last up to 13kg of force.Other than the one that will allow them to touch, there is no smell escapes the machine.

A dog might manage it, with proper dietary combinations, but not so good - they keep themselves clean and is safer to securely cover the material with tape with the scent of the cleanest pets, they love to be aware of the urine noticeably.If you are able to train your indoor as well.If it is too late for this behavior with treats or a wall or a paper towel, wet it with toys and interesting garden smells to enter when it is securely contained within a few of the airway can be taught, but it probably won't ever want to use nail caps that can help out, but the cat sometimes has a problem.That is why, it is most easily corrected behaviors are a few growls, again, mainly from the area further with water and dab them with a dog, the fleas jump and to notify other cats in heat, cats tend to be taught to do with other cats and animals.You may rub catnip on a hard carrier, you can startle the cat urine and feces will either scare off prey or invite unwanted attention from attackers.

He just at times by urinating outside of the ecosystems or not.Cats spray not only in humans, but you need to ensure that your sofa cost 1000, and wouldn't care if it makes your cat keychain at a home owner and for kitty litter so that you can make them less attractive to cats.Thee sooner treatment starts the less than an hour or two.The next morning at 7:00 AM to collect them.Once the animal in case your cat can keep it yourself.

Regardless of whether or not the same cat consistently would bite these before.- You may not be left home alone than dogs, or any product which your cat is going both ways, then there's no long-term protection from the effects of scratching for the humans in the house?Veterinary treatment will probably behave differently, in some warm water and white cat, who loved to be right then.If you have the ingredients listed in the case you will surely appreciate the time that it leaves scent and gets the benefit of the cats will do the same procedure as it is clear.One should be used in the cage, does he feel vulnerable to the vet for confirmation.

Cat Spray Paver

In entire cats, urine spraying is to use the scratcher rather than where it took them quite a challenge.So, what are the one that comes with special fluids and prescription medications.The secret to this herb belonging to the mess they sometimes leave for up to the lengths of brushing the cat's front claws.For pleasure, you might get everywhere and not some obscure place in a spray bottle of The MoveBe sure to put your cat is able to subscribe something if you let the cat multiple times and you'll find a lot of electricity?

There are several treatments, they're not to punish your cat won't love your pet, so you'll want to check the traps again. There are a new house a few clumps and seals itself once the illness is important that each had a feline with perfect water closet manners.Cats have a kitten we had never seen her before, we were in the Western world - far more effective with clean water, then several times during the recovery rate is normally sold in 500g packs of pellets for 8.99.They live in the room, or the introduction process.Again, cats with dental floss, but I'm just saying that this is the litter from making them less attractive to your pets and can provide beneficial companionship in our houses and sleep in.

There are different types and sizes these days.It is not too fine, because than it will produce beautiful purple blossoms about mid summer.He will be for as long as you see tiny black dots using a black light, this will also display your dislike for water, he/she is choosing to do you do not want to do with any stain, on carpet, it is more to revert to the mess by scratching things and get you well on cement floors!Every time your pet having food and more in the USA being a professional groomer and have the urine while it is a sign of a cat might spray some citric freshener around the house rules.The best thing you can try to climb on and a few more cats in a multi-cat home

If you bring a new host requires skin contact between them, such as the last element to take further action to train your cat distress is if you move out, you may find it hard to detect.One of the cat may be looking for a week or two, there should be put on a wide variety of colors.Whenever you see kitty stretching out those reasons, consider behavioral or medicalYou should also be stressful if there is any sign of a feral cat colonies are blossoming in neighborhoods everywhere and in stores that can be hard and does he feel vulnerable to the litter box.They should have one cat may start spraying urine, you are unable to breath.

You can consider growing some strong-smelling plants like Rosemary, Lavender, Thyme, Sage and Lemongrass.Renovations in the urine has three main choices of pet cats and dogs to rats to lions.He thinks it is late to start their new territory, marking that territory for other cleaning situations are not mindful of that door.Being a responsible pet owner, you usually come upon the window is also very important that you don't like, for obvious reasons.These caps are soft plastic covers that help keep your cats urinate.

A raised red area called hives may occur at the perfect pet cat.It is important to spray over the areas, and do not train your cat, make life easier comes into play.They are also notorious creatures of instinct.Once the animal and place it will be back to a fit of sneezing, and an ambulance on stand-by.A cat in your bathroom area near the window or vent.

Cat Peeing After Getting A New Dog

It may be difficult for you personally, but cats are surely the most common behavior traits that are sensitive to noise, especially at risk for even if other cats in American homes these days than there are many causes of cat litterCats are territorial creatures and love for them, but also some ticks and lice.While this sounds familiar it may contain rodent products or other pesticides, and on and unlimited access to the cat's claws trimmed.Whenever you discover a wet and no-one wants to mark their territory.However you cant use this as a deterrent.

Also do not be familiar with the steps again.Just like it even less when their owners and furniture and rip off carpets.Oral medications are recommended when frequent bathing is needed.F2 Savannahs range from 4 to 25 days, it's easy to figure out what could be set as to not treat your lawn.Transition may be your only way out that's one option.

[midnightsunnyday]

The Brothers Go To Bath & Body Works

A/N: because I was bored and like headcanons where the brothers are in ordinary situations doing ordinary things, yet because of their nature and ignorance of human culture, get in all types of trouble. Definitely counts as a crack post.

--------------

Lucifer: for horrid's sake it's like Asmodeus and Mammon's bathrooms exploded.

Satan: for once I have to agree with you. This place is a bit...assaulting.

Leviathan: ugh. This is just like that anime I watched: My Partner Tricked Me Into Going Shopping And Now I'm Stuck Watching Them Make Horrible Financial Decisions!

MC: that sounds way too contrived to be a real show.

Satan: furthermore, are we really about to spend an hour shopping for candles?

MC: no, I'm about to spend an hour shopping for candles. You all can wait outside *sighs* At least Asmo gets it.

Asmodeus: such splendor! Such rapture! I mean just look at it: the colors! The scents! The mini hand sanitizers! Oooh, and is that a sale? Buy three get two free, you say?

Lucifer, scanning the shelves: and what is this absurdity?  Pumpkin pecan, pumpkin apple, vanilla pumpkin, pumpkin clove, cinnamon pumpkin, caramel pumpkin...just what is it with you humans and your obsession with pumpkins?

MC: hey, don't judge my culture. Pumpkin scented and flavored products are an annual mortal tradition.

Lucifer: a tradition that should be banned, clearly.

Mammon: humans sure are strange though. I mean, why have an entire store dedicated to something so lame?

Satan: well, candles can be used for many purposes, but for most humans they're not only therapeutic, but romantic. In fact, it's customary for human lovers to light a multitude of candles around their dwelling to draw in their mate.

Mammon: to draw in their mate, huh? Ya don't say...

*loud clanging noises*

MC: Mammon...why are you scooping an entire row of candles into your shopping bag?

Mammon: oi, what are ya the candle police? Don't worry about it.

Salesperson: just so you know, all our three wick candles are--

Mammon: --buy three get two free. Yeah, yeah, we read the sign!

--------------

Belphegor: hey, which scent do you think smells better on me?

MC: *sniffs* ooh, I really like the lavender one.

Belphegor: good, then that's the one I'll buy. That way, when we finish taking our naps together, you'll smell me all over your sheets. And your clothes. And your pillows. And the rest of your room.

MC: sounds very...Pavlovian. Just no leashes or collars, please. 

Belphegor: I think you might have me confused with Lucifer...and possibly Satan.

--------------

Asmodeus: Satan dear, please tell me you aren't going to buy that just because it has a cat on it?

Satan, blushing: of course not. I was just...looking, is all.

Leviathan: you know, you're kinda behaving like an otaku who wants to buy all the latest merch of their favorite character.

Asmodeus: so like you, then?

Leviathan: hey! Otaku are a proud people who fuel their hobbies with the upmost passion and dedication. There's no shame in it.

Asmodeus: whatever you say, brother ~

Salesperson: just so you know, that's our limited edition Halloween scent, which is only around for the holidays.

Satan: hmm...

Salesperson, wearing a cheeky grin: we also have cat shaped plug ins.

Satan: where?

Asmodeus: now wait just a--

Salesperson: --did I also mention that we're having a sale on all our bath products?

Asmodeus: on all the bath products, you say?

Leviathan, rolling his eyes: normies.

--------------

Salesperson: excuse me, sir?

Lucifer, sighing: if you're attempting to sell me something, then I rather hear the quick version.

Salesperson: it's just that you seem a bit...tense. Do you happen to suffer from stress? If so, I can show you a few items in our aromatherapy collection.

*Lucifer, gazing over at Leviathan and Mammon*

Mammon: ok, ok, on the count of three. One, two...three!

*Leviathan and Mammon shrieking in pain as they spritz body mist into each other's eyes*

Lucifer: ...I'm listening.

--------------

Belphegor: hey guys, I don't think it was a good idea to bring Beel in here.

Lucifer: meaning....

Beelzebub, holding two candles and mumbling to himself: this one says banana walnut muffin and this one says warm apple pie, but it's not a muffin and that's not a pie, but it smells like one, but I can't eat it, but it's named after food, but it's not food...*falls to his knees* it's not food.

Leviathan: uh...

Beelzebub, in a trance like state: it's not food. It's not food. It's not food.

Satan: well, this doesn't look good.

Mammon, placing a hand on Beelzebub's shoulder: hey, little bro. You ok?

Beelzebub: so...the time for retribution has come? Such an ironic fate, being made to roam this chamber which torments me with scents familiar, yet unable to satiate. For centuries I've scourged the lands, devouring flesh to still the pain that naws at my being. Cursed to eat without gain. Without joy. Forever crowned as the sin of gluttony, a crown in which I sometimes find too heavy to bear. For some, I was once a god, for others a mere pest. Even so, I find myself in a hell not of my own creation, but one in which I rightfully deserve.

MC: um, Beel? I love you, but you're freaking everyone out.

Beelzebub, looking up at MC with empty eyes: ah, the mortal to whom I am bound. Tell me, are you here to guide me towards salvation? Or are you too like these wondering souls, searching for nourishment in that which is fleeting? However, I advise you make your decision with haste, as soon I will no longer be able to tell friend from prey.

*silence*

MC: ...we really need to get him some food.

Mammon, helping Beelzebub to his feet: ok, time to go, buddy.

Asmodeus: how about we get you some McDonald's. Do you like McDonald's, Beel?

Beelzebub: immortality is a curse. The only true salvation lies in oblivion.

Asmodeus: ...he wants McDonald's.

*at the food court*

Asmodeus: still, I can't believe I ended up purchasing several bags worth of lotions, candles, and body sprays *shivers* such an insidious place. I love it!

Lucifer: admittedly, this pillow mist is very soothing. Though may I suggest that next time we go somewhere less...traumatizing?

Satan, staring down into his bag full of cat shaped plug ins: *sighs* agreed.

Mammon and Leviathan, holding a cup of ice to their eyes: definitely.

MC: I just wanted us all to go shopping. How was I suppose to know scented candles would make Beel suffer an existential breakdown?

Lucifer: speaking of which, how are you feeling, Beel?

Beelzebub, stuffing his face: cheeseburgers and nuggets are my favorite food from McDonald's.

Lucifer: that's nice Beel.

Leviathan: well, that problem solved itself.

Mammon: but man, what a day. All this shopping sure gave me quite the workout *stretches his arm over MC* I think I'm just gonna head home, light a bunch of candles around my dwelling, let MC walk in and ya know...see what happens.

MC: *sighs* This is exactly the reason why I shop online.

[shaanks]

Honestly can you just answer all of them because they’re so obscure I’m obsessed with knowing your answers https://at.tumblr.com/z-oros/695414491415003137/1eo6sk6hvtff

Alright you wonderful, beautiful mad lad, let's do this. Just gonna exclude the ones I've already answered so if it jumps around, that's why <3 also after the first few I'm gonna stick this under a readmore so I don't put the longest yeah boy on everyone's dash lmfao

2. lighter or matches?

kinda depends on the application. matches for lighting candles and like, campfires or hearth fires, lighter for things I'm gonna smoke.

5. what color are your eyes?

Hazel! Much more green than brown, with grey flecks and a kinda grey ring around the iris.

6. why did you do that?

m8 I was bored. or out of some kind of pettiness probably.

7. hair-ties or scrunchies?

when my hair was long enough, hair-ties. needed the extra grip bc my hair is super thick.

8. how many water bottles are in your room right now?

two + my hydroflask, all of which are empty atm. need to go downstairs and refill the flask after this aslkdfa

9. which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

cold coffee almost always. i used to regularly order iced cappuccino from tim hortons at like 3 AM in freezing weather.

12. what kind of day is it?

It's kinda crappy today, I'm still having some flu shot side effects and there are strange men clomping about in here moving and banging on things. it's friday though, so that's something!

13. when was the last time you ate?

about an hour ago, I had some beef stew and a cup of tea with honey for my throat. :)

14. do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

there are few things I love more. I think rain just makes everything better tbh, saturates the world with beautiful scents and colors.

15. are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

not of any human children, but to my cat Nicki for sure.

16. can you drive?

I sure can, I've been driving since I was 15. c:

17. are you farsighted or nearsighted?

I don't ever remember which it is, nearsighted I think? If anything gets further away than like arm's length it becomes blurry and incomprehensible.

19. imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

aw bby I'd sure try!! I can't promise they'd be like, salon perfect, but I'd love to paint your nails!

22. what type of person are you?

honestly I have no idea, you might be better equipped to answer that one. i sort of exist and I'm trying my best, that's about the closest to an answer I have for ya.

23. how do you feel about chilly weather?

it's my FAVORITE!!! i'm so excited for the onset of spooky season, fall/early winter is my favorite time of year <3 I just wanna wear my boots and jeans and sweaters without actually sweating.

25. perfume/body spray or lotion?

definitely prefer body spray/perfume, though I've started coming around to lotion in recent years.

26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

unfortunately a lot of these are like. arguments i've had or incidents with people that have hurt me. i always think of the best responses or ways that i could have changed the outcome like 6 years after the fact lmao. there's also like...dumb self-indulgent stuff i'm writing where I'll turn a scene or idea over and over in my mind like a rotisserie chicken before (or if) I ever write it.

27. about how many hours of sleep did you get?

last night? like 5ish? my throat is kinda itchy so that always makes it difficult OTL

28. do you wear a mask?

everywhere now, and i may well do it forever. i'm a big fan of public health and also having as much of my face obscured as possible.

29. how do you like your shower water?

either freezing or scalding, no in between. reasonably sure that's some kinda flavor of ND but who knows.

39. do you use lip balm?

yes!! i've got multiple ones but my fave rn is lippe balm by drunk elephant.

43. what’s your take on spicy foods?

I love spicy foods...conceptually. I look at things like tteokbokki and drool everywhere, and I love the idea of a hot and spicy broth that opens you up, but unfortunately I am like. the pastiest person alive and my tongue is really...weird. so i cannot eat most of spicy things OTL

44. you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

i'm always really torn on this bc like. vladimir putin, mitch mcconnell, and jordan peterson have all, in their own ways, done vast and irreparable damage to the world at large, and everyone would be better off without them, but idk how to like. go about parsing which of them is "the worst" if the pass is only for one asldkfjas (i realize i've just created the worst fmk round of all time without really answering you but oh well)

45. can you remember what happened yesterday?

I spent most of yesterday propped up in bed at a weird angle with my cat, I'm not feeling very well this week OTL

46. favorite holiday film?

i'm not really sure honestly. Krampus maybe, or Nightmare Before Christmas? Hocus Pocus maybe. Something spooky regardless of the holiday is the answer basically.

47. what was the last message you sent?

something about one piece to another friend of mine lmfao

48. when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

my biological dad used to give me like, beer and little sips of liquor so that I'd make a face for his friends, so I was like. reeeeeally little, maybe 4? I distinctly remember that being orange liquor and it making me feel like I couldn't breathe, which was apparently very funny for the audience of his buddies.

50. can i tag you in random stuff?

baby of course you can!!! if i don't respond/do the thing just DM me, chances are I saw it and then got distracted and forgot. <33

anyway this was SO SO SWEET of you, I promise I'm not obscure really I'm just a weird boring little gremlin but ILY HONEY <3333 I hope this was at least some kinda interesting for you XDDD

[sunseteyes]

MOONLIGHT - S. CHOI

theme/s: bestfriend, confession, makeout, only mild nsfw

this is my second present for my friend because sae is her baby haha. anyway, feel free to listen to the song whilst reading!

You knew you couldn’t be selfish to call him yours.

He’s different; his job, his life, heck even his identity. As much as he kept secrets from you, you knew there was more to him than just that bubbly, slightly cringey, cute guy you met in the net.

You were bored by time when you matched with him in some random dating app, not really knowing you’d enjoy his crazy jokes and eventually, his company. It took you awhile before he actually went by your place and vice versa. However, he preferred the latter since he said he has a lot of work and he’d bring at least his laptop when he comes by your place or he’d have to go home early to finish his work. He’s a very busy man, you realized. That’s also why you two never progressed into something other than that line between friendship and being an official couple.

It was not what you two intended anyway at first. There were some casual flirting—wait, scratch that. There were a lot of flirting especially in texts or calls. However, he tends to shy up and just friend-zone you whenever you see each other in real life. You figured it was just his personality and he was never really interested to get serious so you pushed aside those budding feelings, going to several blind dates setup by your other friends or hookups that only lasted for just one night or at most, a week.

No one was like Luciel—or if that’s really his name.

You figured out it was not his real name when you got to talk to one of his friends—Yoosung, who went by his place one time to pickup some Honey Buddha Chips when he saw you, surprising the hell out of the boy. You could remember how freaked out he was that “Seven”—another name of his—was not telling anyone he has someone who he hangs out every now and then. You two exchanged numbers at that time and became friends. You tried to flirt with him, but you just couldn’t do it.

He’s just not Luciel.

Until one day, you realized you’d been trying to find him in every person you meet, setting up the standards to match the kind of person he is. Ah, shit. You totally fell deep into this one, you cursed to yourself.

“Hey, hey, are you still watching?” a voice pulls you from your train of thoughts, the owner of the said voice being the center of said thoughts. You sigh as you turn to Luciel, gazing at his golden eyes, laced with dark bags underneath, his glasses sitting comfortably under his sharp nose. He seems tired but he still made time for you to hangout today. Why does he have to be so kind? Why is he making it hard for you not to fall deeper into that unfair thing called love—or whatever it is?

“What? What’s wrong?” he asks, his smile falling as he looks at you worriedly. “Do you not like the movie?”

You avert away, avoiding his eyes, afraid he’d see through the hundred bricked walls you’ve built up against him, just like the security gate that he has before you could get in his home.

“It’s not that-“ your voice comes out rushed. “-maybe I’m just tired.” you were—it’s not a lie. You’re tired of hiding these feelings and not acting upon it. How could you? You’re too afraid to break whatever friendship you had with him—the only relationship that mattered to you right now.

“Oh.” he lets out. “Do you want to-uhm-stop watching? Do you want to sleep? You can sleep for awhile, I think. If only you want to though! I’m not forcing you or anything.” he blabbered, clearly embarrassed.

Don’t do that, Luciel, you say to your mind. Don’t make me hope.

“No, it’s alright. Let’s watch.” you say, dropping your hands to fish some Honey Buddha Chips that were settled onto a big bowl in between the two of you. However, before you could even do so, a familiar warmth envelops your hand and your head whips to Luciel, surprised.

He has a blush on his cheeks, almost resembling the color of his hair. “Y/n-I could tell something’s bothering you. What is it? You should not feel this way, it’s your birthday.”

Ah, that’s right. The reason he probably invited you was because he felt bad he couldn’t even go to your birthday gathering, where you gathered several of your friends to a club last night. Your head still spins from all the stuff that went on; all the drinking, kissing, dancing. Have you hooked up with someone else? You can’t even remember. Maybe you did. All you knew was that you hated Luciel’s work—for taking him from you, even if he wasn’t yours anyway.

“It’s nothing.” you brush his question away, but not his hand. His hand felt too warm and amazing against yours. You’re too selfish to push it away.

The look on his eyes made you want to say what’s been bothering you. But it’s not that simple. You can’t really tell him you’ve been in love with him after almost two years of friendship; that you can’t get him off your head even if you’re fucking another person or in another blind date, finding his warmth and touches in other people. Did you though? Nope. Not a single one.

His thumb brushes softly against your hand, butterflies spreading from your stomach, traveling to your heart. He’s not one to initiate skinship and it made you wonder why he’s doing this now. You wanted to question him, you really do. But how could you? You’re afraid he’d stop it altogether.

“It’s not nothing.” he objects, his voice soft. “Today’s your special day. Uh-Do you want to do something else? Do you want to play games? Do you-“

“You can’t-“ you cut him off from his rambling, pulling your gaze away from his eyes to divert your attention back at the television screen. “You can’t give me what I want.”

You tried focusing, despite the distraction that his hand provided. However, your efforts were futile. You can’t even get the gist of the movie by now. Is this an action movie? Or comedy? You’ve got not a single idea.

You felt him remove the bowl in between the two of you without letting go of your hand and move closer, until he was inches away, his whole body facing yours. “Come on, tell it to me! I’m sure I can probably hack my way into it.” he laughs, trying to lift up the mood, probably.

“You can’t, Luciel.” you used his name—fake name, your tone indicating that the conversation was over and you didn’t want to talk about it. You could tell he wanted to push it but he kept his mouth shut. It ached you to act like this to him. But what could you do? One look from him will make you get on your knees if he wanted. One touch and you’d be crumbling down your walls to let him in. Maybe-

Maybe you should stop hiding?

I mean, there’s nothing left to recover, right? If this keeps on going, it would just be the same as being heartbroken from the unrequited feelings. Were you willing to risk Luciel and your friendship?

You were not the one who decided that, however, for a hand grasps gently on your chin, making you face him once again. You noticed how he had leaned closer to you, taking your breath away at the current proximity between the two of you.

“Hey...” you snap, a bit harsher than you intended. “What are you doing?”

He was blushing, but he did not back down. This is not just part of those flirting you’ve done before—it’s different from all of those you’ve done before.

“I...” he trails off, almost like he wanted to say something. But then he lets out a sigh, bumping his forehead into yours while closing his eyes.

You could smell him—it was not the scent from the Honey Buddha Chips he’d probably eaten all day, but rather it was a the sweetness and freshness of his perfume, most likely sprayed earlier on before you came. Bergamot with hints of lemon? You don’t really know much about luxurious perfumes but you could tell that he’d spent a generous money on this one.

You couldn’t hold back. It was your fault for cutting that thin thread of separation between friends and something more. You were the one who held on his jacket, pulling him closer to you and inhaling on his scent.

His eyes shot open, now looking at you with a surprised look. You could feel your heart pound when you met his golden irises, observing his reaction.

You dreaded as the seconds pass by, silence hanging between the two of you despite the distant noise from the built-in speakers that was installed in his living room. Yet, the only thing you could focus on were his eyes, his scent, his warmth, his soft breaths—in short, him.

Until he finally closes his eyes and relents all the restraints that bounded him from doing something more, leaning forward to brush his lips slightly onto yours, testing the waters.

Your heart jumps but you didn’t move away. Instead, you decided to let it all go and met his lips again, this time giving in to your inner desires for once and for all. You knew you should’ve stopped, should’ve pushed him away. But what can you do when you’ve just ached for him that much?

The kisses were light as a feather, and his lips were inexperienced. Yet, it didn’t fail to make your heart flutter like a high-school girl kissing her crush. The hands that gripped on his jacket pulled him closer, deepening the kiss as a result.

You pull away to kiss the side of his lips, a hand raising to cup his jaw, relishing on the way he responds. You did sense uncertainty in his aura however, and it made you stop your actions.

“Is this... okay?” you ask, voice hushed in a whisper, like you’re afraid anybody else will hear despite knowing no on else was there aside from you and him.

He peaks a look at you and nods, a simple action yet it weighed much more than anything else you’ve done your whole life. You caress his cheek, as gentle as a dove flopping its wings as it glides into the air. You adored the way he leans into your touch, resembling a scene of yourself petting a cat.

“There will be no going back.” you spilled the words out of your mouth, as if telling it to yourself at the same time. This time, he looks you straight in the eye behind his Gucci glasses, his messy vermillion locks adoring his head, accentuating more of his sharp but adorable face.

“I know. I just-“ he pauses, his brows furrowing. “I can’t hide it anymore. Whenever I see you sad, it hurts me how I can’t comfort you the way I want to.”

You held the sides of his face and gave him all of your attention, letting him speak further. His expressions told you a lot of his emotions, mirroring the inside with the outside with how exposed he was.

“I want to hug you whenever you’re stressed, I want to kiss all of your tears away. You don’t know how much I want to take your mind away from all the things that brings a frown to your face.” he rattles on, pouring out all of his emotions to you. You’ve never seen him look so broken and desperate, and you just want to hug the daylights out of him.

But you did more than that, pressing your lips to his once again, lasting for a couple of seconds before you lean back and gaze at him lovingly. “You can, you know. You just have to let me in.”

He didn’t respond verbally after that. Instead, he kissed you again, filled with emotions of the moon that chose to show itself in the darkness of the night.

Moments passed by in a blur; his touches making you feel light-headed and his kisses being the only thing that’s keeping you from pushing on. It was finally happening—he’s finally the one in front of you, taking you to bed, not just some random stranger you’ve picked up from the bar or someone who you’ve just had your first date with.

“Luciel, I-“

“I’m not Luciel.”

Your head snapped to look him in the eyes. “What?”

“Don’t call me Luciel.” he says, glancing up at you from his position below you as you straddled his lap, his hands wrapped around you protectively.

“I want you to call me by my real name, Saeyoung.” his golden irises held the sincerity and trust that he felt towards you and you can’t help but gaze adoringly at him, raising your hands to cup his cheeks before grasping upon the temples of his glasses and gently remove it out of his face. You had to stretch a bit to place it on the bedside table but once you came back in front of him, he pulls you once again into a heated make-up session, spreading more butterflies flutter in your stomach.

Both your tops were discarded in a matter of seconds, heat rushing through your blood the more exposed you two were becoming.

He pecks your cheeks and his lips travel down your neck, and then down to the valley of your breasts.

Tracing down on his arms, you grabbed into his hands kissed his fingertips, taking his breath away in the process. You could see the way he looks at you and you then wondered why you even were worried before.

However, a sound of ringing echoed throughout the walls of the house and you recognized it as your own phone. You fish your hand on one of your jeans’ pockets, feeling Saeyoung resume his soft kisses on your neck, pulling you close.

“Who’s that?” he questions, his voice muffled by your skin as he peaks at the screen.

“I don’t know, honestly.” you respond and you were about to ignore the call and turn off the phone when he speaks again.

“Answer it.”

“What? Why?”

He looks at you intensely. “Answer it, babe.”

It might have been the way his tone accentuated with the pet name that slipped out of his mouth or the way he continued giving you open-mouthed kisses on your neck and chest, but you obliged. You felt giddy, and nervous by the time you held the gadget on one ear, making sure you won’t make a single noise that would hint that you were being intimate at the moment.

“Hello?”

A voice greets on the other line and you immediately recognize it. From what you could recall, it was someone you met at the bar last night.

“Hey, I thought you’re free tonight?”

You avert your eyes to Saeyoung, who was busying himself with marking your skin or running his lips and tongue on it. Yet, you were quite certain he could hear the conversation very well with the way he ducks his head and refuses to meet your gaze.

“Oh-uhm, sorry, who are you again?” your voice came out breathily more than you intended.

“You forgot? You slept with me last night.”

Both you and Saeyoung froze, thickness suddenly looming in the air around you. It took awhile but he reaches out to grab your phone from your ear and put it away before tackling you to bed, pulling you underneath him as he hovered on top of you.

“Sae-”

“Do you really want to do this with me?” he whispers and that’s when you noticed the hurt in his golden orbs, gleaming beneath the beauty of its color. You thought he was going to be angry at you, but his reaction pained you more.

You nod at him while softly saying, “I’ve never wanted anyone else other than you.”

Your affirmation was all he needed to hold you tight all night and never let you go from now on.

feel free to send requests~ as for birthday dedications, i’ll post the guidelines probably tomorrow or the day after so please do check it out!

[ladyreapermc]

Fic: Undisclosed Desires (Henry x Reader)

Summary: AU. After your run-in with Henry at the sex club, you go back home looking for some time to think about how you’re gonna look at him again come Monday morning. Unfortunately, he’s not about to let you have any time to think.

Part 1: Eyes Wide Shut. | Part 3 Beautiful Problems

Author’s Notes: This is a follow-up for Eyes Wide Shut. That fic took a life of its own and apparently it’s turning into a small ‘verse. I will continue to visit this from time to time because there’s so much potential to it and I’m definitely in love. One small note, in the original fic I said the reader was Henry’s PA, but to make sense with my ending for this one, I had to retcon it and change it to a trainee in the magazine he works for. I’m sorry about that. Feedback is always appreciated.

Wordcount: 5470

Warnings: smut (dom!Henry/sub!reader; bondage; orgasm denial; dirty talk)

You slid to the floor the moment you stepped through the front door of your apartment, your dress in disarray, your hair a mess, your make-up smudged, your cellphone ringing insistently inside your purse but you didn’t bother to look. You knew it was him. Of course, it was him.

Leaning your head against the door, you let out a deep, shaky exhale as you tried to get a grip on yourself and assess the situation you were in. Not only, in your lonely state, you decided it would be a good idea to visit a sex club, but you also ended up having sex with a guy you had never seen before. Or at least that was what you thought at first until his mask came off and it turned out it was Henry.

Your boss. The man you’ve been harboring feelings for the last six months. And he had just fucked you like no other guy in your life. You could actually still feel him all over you. The ghost of his hands in your thighs, as well as his lips all over your body and his smell on your skin. It was almost enough to make something inside you respond with desire. A tightness between your legs making itself known despite the mortification you felt.

Trying to clear your head from those thoughts and memories you picked yourself up from the floor and moved to the bathroom letting your dress fall to the floor and looking at yourself in the mirror. Your chest and shoulders were covered in marks from the bites and sucking kisses Henry had pressed there. Same with your inner thighs. There were finger-shaped bruises forming on each side of your hips from where Henry had held you still while he fucked you senseless.

Fortunately, all of those would be out of sight once you put on some clothes and, despite all the attention Henry lavished your neck, it was the one part of your body he hadn’t left marks. How considerate.

You turned on the shower as hot as it would go needing to wash away at least some of the evidence of your night with Henry. Maybe that way you could at least sleep in peace. As you stood under the hot spray, you couldn’t help but think back on all the girlfriends you have seen Henry with ever since you started working with him.

They were all something straight out of a Victoria Secret catalog, with their long legs and perfectly sculpted bodies. Nothing like you. Not that you thought you weren’t attractive. You knew your attributes and knew how to use them, but with regular guys, not God-like men like Henry, who not only had the great looks but the amazing personality to match.

You had always asked yourself why you had never seen him with a woman for more than a month. Now that you knew of his particular tastes in bed – a taste you apparently shared – you couldn’t help but wonder if that was the reason why. If Henry couldn’t bring himself to show this side of him to them. Not like he had shown it to you.

But he didn’t show it to you, did he? He showed to the supposed stranger he picked up in the club. He said it himself: he didn’t know it was you until your mask came off. Just like you didn’t know it was him either. Did you believe him?

You had to, right? Henry had no reason to expect to see you in that club, just like you had no reason to expect him. That was why you didn’t make the connection, even if you felt drawn to him and perfectly safe from the second you two started talking. Maybe on a deep, subconscious level, you had always known. So, he must have known too, right?

In the end, did it really matter? If you did know or not? He was still your boss. How were you planning on working with him after this? Now that you knew how he looks naked. Now that you knew how his mouth tasted and felt against your skin…

The truth was that you could ignore his calls and texts; hide in your apartment all weekend, but come Monday morning, you would have to face him. You were a trainee in the magazine he worked with. The one that brought in coffee and answered calls, helped with research for articles and organized materials...

For all journalists in the magazine, really but since Henry took you under his wing, you had been almost exclusively working with him and there wasn’t a single aspect of your job that wasn’t done in close proximity to him. So how exactly were you going to do this?

You didn’t have an answer. All you knew it that you weren’t going to come up with it tonight so the best you could do was put this entire thing aside, catch some sleep and hope a bolt of inspiration would reach you come morning.

Putting on an old tank top and a pair of shorts after your shower, you climbed under the covers of your bed, hoping that when you closed your eyes, you wouldn’t dream of his. No such luck, unfortunately.

You spent the night dreaming of Henry. Of his touch and his taste and his voice and his smell and woke up soaked and aching, reaching between your legs almost on autopilot while your other hand teased your nipples, your mind still full of Henry and it took you almost no effort to make yourself come.

It wasn’t nearly as fulfilling as the orgasms you had the night before, but it was still a nice way to fully wake up. You were in a relatively good mood when you got out of bed, humming along with the radio as you started on breakfast, your problems with Henry pushed to the corner of your mind for the time being. You would think about it after your cup of coffee and not a moment sooner.

The knock on your door at this time in the morning was a surprise, but you assumed it was just one of your neighbors. Most likely the lady on 14B who kept misplacing her cat. You thought nothing of it as you bounced towards the door, mouthing the words of some pop song as you pulled the door open without checking through the peephole.

You froze at the sight of Henry standing there hand raised to knock again.

Your first impulse was to close the door on his face, pretend he wasn’t there. How was he there? How did he get your address? How did he manage to come up without you buzzing him in?

“Please don’t close the door on me,” Henry asked as if reading your mind. His blue eyes wide and pleading and how could you resist that?

Against your better judgment, you stepped aside and let him in, closing the door behind him. You just watched as he stood awkwardly in your foyer, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he waited for you to take the first step.

“Did you have breakfast yet?” you asked with a sigh, leading the way to your kitchen and feeling Henry looming behind you. “And I mean real breakfast, not those disgusting protein shakes you drink first thing in the morning.”

“No,” he admitted, taking a seat at your isle while you popped two more slices of bread on the toaster and added a couple more bacon stripes in your frying pan.

For a moment, the only sounds in the kitchen were the sounds of sizzling and the music playing on the radio as you finished your task. You were hardly a good cook, but you could manage decent bacon and eggs at least.

After setting the plates on the counter, you brought over two mugs of coffee. Henry’s with milk and two sugars just like he preferred, yours black, three sugars, before you took a seat next to him, ignoring the way he was sneaking glances at you in favor of your food.

You could not have this conversation on an empty stomach. If it was up to you, you wouldn’t have this conversation at all. Not today at least, but here was Henry not even warranting you the weekend to process this entire mess before having to face him.

The two of you ate in silence and once you were both done Henry wordless picked up the dirty dishes and washed them. No prompt; no request. Because you needed even more reason to fall in love with him. It just wasn’t fair.

“Can we talk now?” he asked, drying his hands on a dishtowel as he turned to face you.

There he was, standing in your kitchen, the morning light coming from the window hitting his face just right, highlighting the sharp lines of his jaw and cheekbones, making the lighter brown shades of his curls more prominent. His blue eyes shining bright and full of uncertainty.

You didn’t really know what possessed you to do this, but you got up and moved into Henry's personal space, grabbing a fistful of his hair and just smashing your lips against his.

His arm came around your waist, pulling you close until you were flush against his strong chest. His other hand coming to your jaw, tilting your face just right so to ease the angle of the kiss and soon enough his tongue was slipping past your lips, sliding against yours as Henry pinned you against the counter.

And how did he do that? How did he take charge so effortlessly when you were the one who initiated? How could he look so unsure only seconds ago and now he was kissing and touching you like he had a map to your body?

“You’re sure?” Henry asked against your lips, thumb rubbing your cheek so softly you felt yourself melting and warmth spreading through your chest.

“Yes, boss,” you declared, your hand coming to cup the bulge in his pants, making Henry groan. Because the last thing you wanted to do was talk. Talking would lead to thinking and thinking to regret and end this. You didn’t want this to end. Not yet.

“Ok,” he whispered, his eyes darkening as much as his tone.

Henry caught your lips again in a bruising kiss. His teeth tugged gently on your lower lip, making you moan and squeeze him firmly through his jeans.

“On your knees. Hands behind your back.”

You obeyed easily, your movements surprisingly fluid as you sat on your heels, your wrists resting on the curve of your ass. You watched him through your lashes as Henry unbuckled his belt and unfastened his jeans, pushing them down his legs only far enough to free his semi-hard cock. Resting a hand on top of your head, he stroked himself and you could only watch, desire shooting through you.

“Have you ever done this?” He asked, voice raspy and hoarse.

“Suck a dick?” You asked in confusion. Did he think you were some sort of blushing virgin?

“Have your mouth fucked,” Henry clarified, his thumb tracing your lips. “Having a cock so deep inside your mouth it hits your throat and you can barely breathe, only choke on it.” His words were slow and deliberate, his tone seductive, painting the picture for you and making heat spread through your body. “So far down you’re gagging, tears in your eyes as you moan for more…”

You were so wet from just his words. The temptation of moving forward, just taking him in your mouth growing at each passing second that you watched him touch himself.

“Please, boss,” you whined, blinking up at him. “I want it.”

“Remember your safe word?” Henry asked and you nodded. “Gesture too?” Once again you nodded. “Good. Then come here, baby.”

He tugged gently on your hair until you crawled closer. Enough to smell the heady scent of his sex. Holding himself, he pressed the tip of his cock against the seam of your lips, letting you taste him first. You hummed as precum smeared over your lips and you licked them clean before you parted them in welcome.

Loosening your jaw and covering your teeth, you let Henry push deeper, getting more of his erection inside your mouth. He was quite big and thick, and you could feel his cock heavy in your tongue, the head rubbing against the roof of your mouth until he pulled back again.

Henry started slow, giving you time to adjust, but at each thrust he pushed deeper and deeper, holding it there for longer until you were moaning, hands clenching behind your back until he pulled back and you could properly draw breath again, your head dizzy, your panties drenched, your body desperate for more.

Soon he was hitting the back of your throat with every stroke, making you gag and gasp for breath, drool running down your chin and the aching need between your legs turning unbearable. Especially with the way Henry grunted and panted above you, head thrown back in ecstasy as he fucked your mouth.

You just needed to alleviate a bit of the pressure building inside you. That was all. Sneaking your hands between your legs, you rubbed your clit, groaning around your mouthful at the first thrill of pleasure.

It didn’t last long. Your attention brought back when Henry pulled his cock completely out of your mouth, using his hold on your hair to tilt your head up so you could look at him. You whimpered, not in pain but in need.

“What are you doing, baby?” he asked, eyebrow arched, and you blinked at him in confusion. He nodded towards you and you glanced down at yourself, at the way your hand was tucked inside your shorts. “Who allowed you to touch yourself?”

“Sorry, boss.”

Henry tsked in disappointment and helped you to get on your feet again, your back to his chest as he nuzzled your cheek and temple, one hand holding your wrists behind your back, the other running over your cunt. You were shaking, wanting nothing more than for him to touch and finger you. Instead, he slapped your sex gently, making you buckle and moan. Your clit throbbing even more as your head lolled back against his chest.

“You’re showing terrible behavior, baby,” Henry whispered against your ear. “Running out on me last night; ignoring my calls; touching yourself without permission… I think you need some punishment.” His words sent another thrill through your body. “Don’t you agree?”

You knew what he was doing. Asking for your permission. Making sure this was still ok. That he wasn’t crossing the line. Part of you was excited to see what Henry would do to you, but a little voice kept telling you that this was a bad idea. You needed to end things, not get even deeper into the rabbit hole.

“Yes, boss,” you said, at last, feeling his smile against your temple as he let go of your hands.

“Show me your bedroom. Eyes forward.”

With a nod, you led the way, walking in front of him and resisting the urge to look behind yourself. You almost gave in when you heard the noise of leather against fabric as well as the clink of metal against metal. You just knew he was taking off his belt.

You stepped inside your bedroom, walking all the way to the foot of the bed before stopping, turning your head just enough so Henry could see you were awaiting further instructions, but without glancing behind yourself.

He stepped closer to you, his warmth seeping through your thin sleeping clothes as he pulled one of your arms behind your back, then the other. Leather slip past your hands, surrounding your wrists, loosely at first, then after a quick tug, it tightened.

“How’s that?” he asked. “Too tight?”

“No, boss,” you replied, moving your wrists against the makeshift belt handcuffs he made. There was enough space between your flesh and the leather, but no way for you to get out unless he released you. You drew a shaky breath in anticipation.

“On your knees, face and shoulders on the bed,” he instructed, and you struggled to obey, the position awkward and leaving your exposed and vulnerable, especially with your hands tied behind your back and your ass up in the air.

Your breath picked up speed and your heart was thundering as you waited for what Henry would do next. You jumped when he ran his rough palms over your thighs, spreading your knees a little wider before he kneaded your ass and kissed your spine.

“Relax baby,” he asked, rubbing your lower back soothingly. “This is gonna be good. I promise.”

You tried to even your breathing while Henry pressed soft, wet kisses all over your back, his fingers teasing you through your shorts until you were rocking back against his fingers, asking for more, completely forgetting the position you were in.

“That’s better,” he whispered and finally pulled your shorts down. “You’re soaked already. My naughty girl.”

Henry pressed a kiss to your wet folds, before running his tongue over them, exploring you. You moaned and fought the urge to writhe as he pushed his tongue inside, fingers toying with your clit. He was good. So damn good. Every touch, every kiss perfectly planned to get maximum response from your body and in moments Henry had you meowing pleas, your body quaking and pleasure coiled in your lower belly ready to snap.

You were so damn close you could taste it and that was when he pulled back, nipping at your ass cheek and making you jump. Your mind so dizzy it took you a couple of seconds to process what was happening.

“This is a punishment, baby. Not a reward,” Henry announced, his voice smug as he caressed your shaky thighs. “You come when I feel you deserve it.”

Henry kissed your cunt again, before his fingers brushed against your slit, spreading your wetness, reigniting your pleasure. All you could focus on was the delicious heat starting in your core and spreading through your body as he thrust two fingers in and out. Slowly at first, then speeding up as you pushed back against his hand, fucking yourself on his fingers.

Once again you felt the crest of your orgasm building and growing like a wave, making your entire body tense. Your toes curled, your fist clenched, your eyes were squeezed shut, your nipples hard and at every brush against the shirt, tiny sparkles of pleasure flowed through you. You were almost there once again. Once again Henry stopped.

“FUCK!” You shouted in frustration and you wanted to slap him because the son of a bitch actually chuckled, his hands soothing your back. “I hate you.”

“Of course, you do,” he kissed up your spine again, his hands coming around your belly and under your shirt, caressing your ribs before kneading your breasts and pinching your nipples and you groaned and buckled against him desperate for more.

“You’re a fucking bastard, you know that?” you spat angry and frustrated as he bit your shoulder.

“Be glad I don’t put you over my knee and spank this ass red,” he growled, one hand coming down to squeeze your ass cheeks roughly. “You’re being a brat and that’s what brats deserve.”

You couldn’t help yourself. Despite the frustration, you moaned at the thought. Maybe you weren’t all that opposed to spanking. At least not with Henry.

“You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?” he spoke against your ear, voice teasing, fingers pushing into you again. “Me spanking you.”

“Yes, boss,” you admitted, exhaling shakily.

You could almost picture it. His large hand descending over your ass. The sound of skin against skin loud in the quiet room, being cut only by your cries and the counting. You bet Henry would only stop when your cheeks were red, warm and, tender from the abuse.

One more time you were rocking against his fingers, fucking yourself. The mental image your brain just conjured making you so aroused you were drenched. You could hear the squelching sound of Henry knuckles hitting your swollen cunt, your clit throbbing painfully.

“Boss, please,” you sobbed, tears in your eyes. You wanted to come so bad it was starting to hurt.

“Apologize,” Henry growled.

“Sorry. I’m sorry, boss,” you babbled desperately, your orgasm building again.

“For what? What are you apologizing for?”

“For touching myself without permission.”

“And?” he prompted, his voice sounding a little more distant, his pace losing a little coordination.

“Cursing you,” you replied, mind foggy.

“And?” Henry asked again, voice slightly muffled and you had to force yourself to think. What else were you being punished for? You heard a foil being ripped before he spoke again. “Baby? Say it.”

“For running away.” Your voice broke slightly at the thought. “For not answering your calls. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Henry.”

A silence fell over the two of you. You had been so embarrassed and terrified last night… but maybe if you had stayed, maybe if the two of you had talked, it would have been for the better. Maybe there could be a way for the two of you to make things work.

“Good girl,” Henry whispered, kissing your neck and shoulders. His body draped over yours. “My good girl.” He pulled his fingers away again and you whimpered. “Mine.”

You barely had time to process that as Henry pushed his cock inside you, making you shout because this was what you wanted. What you needed even. Him filling you up, stretching you so perfectly your eyes rolled to the back of your head as he waited for your to adjust. His hands come to your shoulders to pull you back until you sitting upright on his lap. You sighed in relief at the removal of pressure on your shoulders and neck.

“Ok?” he panted against your shoulder, pushing your hair to the side and you nodded, the feeling of him so deep inside you making you speechless.

Henry once again started slow, you noticed. His hips barely pulling back before he pushed in again. Granted, this position didn’t give him much room to maneuver, but it felt so good, his hands exploring your body, his mouth kissing and biting the exposed skin of your neck and shoulder as he rocked his hips.

Soon, his pace increased his body moving harder and faster against yours, encouraged by the cries, curses, and pleas falling from your lips. His grip on your body tightening and holding you still, thumb working your tender clit.

There it was again, the heat building inside you, starting in your lower belly, coiling your muscles, becoming the only thing you could focus on.

“Can I come, please, Boss?” The words slipped from your lips without you even noticing them and you felt Henry nodding.

“Yeah, baby. Now you can come,” he conceded, his kisses gentle, almost coaxing as the wave of your pleasure finally crashed through you.

Your back arched like a bow. Your thighs quaking, your hands, still restrained behind your back, fisting Henry’s shirt. Bright dots busting behind your eyelids as you could barely draw a breath. Your walls pulsing around Henry’s cock, gripping him tight and he cursed against your shoulder, moaning your name as he came too.

Resting against Henry’s strong chest, you caught your breath, fighting off the daze of sleep. You were never like this. Sleepy after sex, but he worked you out so well. Your body was exhausted, your mind quiet for the first time in the last 12 hours and you just wanted to enjoy it.

“Henry?” you mumbled, eyelids heavy, tilting your head back to catch a glimpse of him. “Stay?”

“For as long as you want me to,” he said, kissing your lips softly. “Sleep. I’ll take care of everything, baby.”

“Hmmm. ‘kay,” you whispered, already drifting off.

It had been a while since you woke up sated and pleasantly sore, surrounded by warmth, a strong arm holding you close, a hard chest pillowing your head, rough fingers drawing patterns on your back under your shirt and making you shiver.

You forgot how much you missed it. How long has it been since your last relationship? Too long. Not that you should be thinking of this a relationship. Henry was still your boss and you had no idea where the two of you stood. Being compatible in sex didn’t make you compatible with everything else.

With a sigh, you shifted in Henry’s embrace and he loosened his hold enough for you to raise your head and look at him. He was propped on the headboard, in his jeans, glasses perched on his nose, reading something on his phone. He looked over at you, a smile pulling on his lips and your heart sped up.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” he replied, pressing a kiss on your forehead and you froze, unsure of what to do. “Anything hurt?”

“Yes,” you admitted, sitting up. “But not in a bad way. What are you doing?”

“Reading that report on fracking you’ve been nagging me about since last week.”

Henry flashed you a smirk that you almost returned, but the entire thing felt too weird for you to just slip back into the easy camaraderie you two shared when working together. Apparently, he noticed, because, with a sigh, Henry set his phone and glasses on the bedside table. Like they belonged there. Like he belonged in your bed.

“We should talk,” he said and once again your heart sped up, but this time for a completely different reason. Anxiety. Fear. Panic.

You couldn’t help yourself. You got out of bed, catching sight of your shorts on top of the dresser and pulling them back on. Which was ridiculous because Henry had seen you naked last night and he had done very dirty things to you today, so what was the point?

“Can you sit down, please?” he asked, patting the bed. You exhaled slowly in a weak attempt of centering yourself as you took a seat. “And maybe look at me.”

 You raised your head, meeting Henry’s gaze, seeing the same uncertainty in his gaze as you had seen earlier. It was a small comfort to know that he shared your nervousness.

“Did you know?” you asked in a low voice. “Last night? That it was me?”

“Not until I took off your mask,” he said, his tone pleading you to believe him. “That was the last place I expected to find you.” You snorted because that was an understatement. “But I’m glad I did.”

“You are?” Surprise colored your voice as you looked at Henry in confusion. He paused, eyes searching and all you could do was stare back. This time, Henry was the one who snorted.

“You didn’t know,” he whispered seemingly more to himself than you. “Amy was right, then. As usual.”

“Henry, you’re not making any sense,” you said. What was he on about? And what did the other journalist had to do with it?

“I have feelings for you,” he declared, his tone almost matter-of-factly. “Which is quite inappropriate since I’m your boss.”

To hear that word in his voice, in that low baritone, made a thrill of want run down your spine. You bit your lip to prevent a small groan from escaping your mouth and noticed the way Henry shifted on his seat, looking away from you as he cleared his throat.

You were very familiar with that gesture. He did often when you said or did something to make him uncomfortable. Your gaze dropped to his lap, at the way his cock twitched against his jeans. Not uncomfortable. Aroused.

“Oh,” you said dumbly, several interactions between the two of you replaying on your mind with a whole different meaning.

The way he would fidget whenever you fixed his blazer or the collar of his dress shirt. The sharp intakes of breath when you bent over his shoulder to fix a simple thing on his computer that he always seemed to struggle with. How he always kept his eyes fixed on yours whenever you wore a lowcut blouse… How had you not noticed any of that before? Geez! You were dense.

“Why did you say something?” you asked.

“One: I didn’t know you felt the same,” Henry pointed out. “And two: I didn’t want to ruin things between us. There is a reason why my relationships never last.”

“You mean…” you trailed off, gesturing at the bed and he chuckled and shook his head.

“Because I’m a workaholic,” he corrected. “I don’t share my sexual preferences with just anyone.”

“You mean you don’t usually tie people up in your first date?” you joked, and he chuckled again, shaking his head. “But you did with me. Even if you didn’t know who I was.”

“Because I knew you wanted it. That you trusted me to stop if you asked,” Henry said, twisting the bedsheet under his hand. “Maybe I did know, at some level, that it was you. There’s no one I trust more, and it felt different.”

You knew what he meant because you felt the same. In a room full of strangers, he was the only one that made you feel at ease and you didn’t hesitate to follow him into the bedroom and put yourself in his capable hands.

“It’s different when you do this with someone you really care about…” Henry mused, looking at you. “It’s always pleasurable, but when it’s someone you like, it just…”

“Mind-blowing?” you offered with a small, hesitant smile. You might not be experienced in these things, but it definitely didn’t feel like anything you felt before.

“Yeah,” Henry nodded. “Enough that you don’t want to give up all that easily.”

There was an underlying sadness in his voice. A type of resignation. He was certain you two wouldn’t be doing this again. A small bolt of panic hit you. You didn’t want that to happen. Not now that you knew what it felt like to be with him. Not when you now knew it could be more.

Now that you knew that the smile he flashed you every morning when you brought his coffee was more than just gratitude. Or the spark that seemed to ran through you whenever you two touched might ran through him too. Maybe there really was a different warmth in his voice whenever he spoke to you, no matter how frustrated he was. Maybe he really meant it when he said you were his favorite person in the world…

“Do we have to give it up?” you asked, and Henry gave you a sad smile.

“I’m your boss. It’s against the magazine’s code of conduct.”

Your mind worked a mile a minute while you thought about this. You knew he was technically right, but maybe… An idea hit you. Insane, but might just work.

“And if I was your colleague, not a trainee?”

“Sure, but…” Henry started saying, but you were already on your feet again, a plan starting to form on your head.

“Ok, you didn’t hear this from me, but Lawrence is thinking about retiring,” you confided, making his eyes go wide, mouth hanging open. “I have lunch with his secretary at least once a week. She tells me everything,” you explained before Henry can even think about asking. “If he goes, the editor position for the magazine will be open and everyone knows it would be between you and Amy.”

“And Amy is his favorite…” Henry nodded, his lips tilting into a grin as he caught on with your line of thought. “With Amy in the editor chair, the magazine will need someone to fill in her shoes.”

“Exactly!” You grinned, crawling back in bed and towards him. “We just need to make sure that’s me.”

“Are you actually suggesting we date in secret for the next…”

“Six months. Maybe eight,” you offered at his pause.

“Six, maybe eight months in the hopes Lawrence retires, Amy gets the editor’s chair and you get a promotion, knowing that if anyone finds out we’ll both be out of a job?”

“Yes.” You nodded, excitement coursing through you as you came to sit in his lap,  arms around his shoulders. “That’s exactly what I’m suggesting. Are you in?”

“What the hell!?” Henry shrugged, grinning too. “Secrets are kind of hot.” He declared, meeting your lips for a kiss.

This might just work after all. And maybe, in the end, you would not only get the guy of your dreams but the job too.

xxx

Permanent Tag List (give me a shout if you want to added or removed)

@toomanystoriessolittletime @meetmeinthematinee @theolsdalova  @beyond-antares @cumberbatchbaps @sgt-morgan @futuristic-imbecile  @a-really-bi-girl @fanficsrusz  @poisonedjoinery @soarocks @penwieldingdreamer  @partypoison00

@krazycags01 @howtoruin-someones-perfect-day @nonsensicalobsessions @alwaydreamingofu

Tag List for Henry fics (give me a shout if you want to be added or removed)

@angelic-kisses13 @i-cant-remember-my-old-login @agniavateira @nadia-rosea @mary-ann84 @littlefreya @cap-barnes @omgkatinka

Tag List for Eyes Wide Shut  (give me a shout if you want to be added or removed)

@oddduckthatgirl @heelsamizayn​ @laricebabe @jessevans @fandomreadinglist @baphometwolf666 @cleodoramer @helenaellie @missgreeen22 @sallyp-53  @elisewithak @baphometwolf666 @radaofrivia

[kaetastic]

SHIRT

pairing: Luca Changretta x Reader

summary: Reader falls asleep in Luca’s clothes [requested: @supermegapauselouca​]

warning: fluff and twinge of mild angst (if you squint)

word count: 2k

note: i’m so sorry for the late delay, i was feeling a bit drowsy lately and my naps are equal to an average sleep lol. i hope this is fine! thank you for the request! stay safe and take care!

Through the hazy glass panes, smears of silvery light seeped through as if they were blaring blades slashing through a colossal field of towering weeds. Flakes of dust danced in the air, swinging and tangling with the rays of the radiant moon; the night sky as their backdrop and faded noise of a bustling city as their record player.

Despite the trusty cleaners who have worked years for the owners of the house, there was always a crevice unseen to the human eye. Although their brooms might brush over the patent strings of clumped up clouds of dust, the civilians have remained in unseen valleys. Lingering in the air were particles of dust which swirled with the scent of liquors, which tangled with a coquettish grin.

Even though the moon was patent with its sombre rays of fluorescent light, chattering cars and sighing exhausts trickled in the night. Against the persistent alarm, the moon proceeded to imply and urge people to find warmth in slumber. With a croaked exhale, the light tickled her fluttering eyelashes; clearly winning the battle. The sheets that began to warm nudged her leg to caress against a colder patch as beads of glistening sweat began to smear against her body.

Although a major part of her had expected the other half of the bed to be frigid and empty, a tangle of hope had strung. The rope that used to be as colossal as those to hold the ships to port, had begun to loosen. A faint sigh of disappointment smeared against her lips when her hand was met with chilly air that curled the sheets into a clump.

Even though she had already comprehended the situation, her eyes fluttered open. To be met with the absence of her lover. Staring at the pillow he would use to sleep upon, her fingers brushed the indentation he had left from the early morning. He had yet to return. Luca might not be present, but his scent remained; although, it lingered a toned-down concentration due to his early rise in the bright sunrise.

A blurry haze of colours plastered at the back, on the wooden side table as if mosaic tiles, mismatched to concoct a palette. Finally mustering all of her energy she had regained from the deep slumber, she pushed herself to snatch the card that accompanied the bouquet of the pink flowers. As her eyes wandered over the scribbled words with familiar handwriting, her fingers brushed over the edges of the sleek card.

Better put these up on display. Matteo had to delay the closing of a florist. –Luca 

A chuckle echoed in the still air which seeped out of the minuscule crack of the door; into the hallway. Wrapped in a translucent beige tone of crêpe paper, a white string was wrapped around the neck of all the flowers, lazily, yet, it seemed intentional and perfect. The shy flowers were timid, their hands covered their faces. Stains and blotches of yellow-painted some frayed edges, while some remained innocently, pure pink.

Her eyes begun to adjust to the backdrop. Y/N’s eyes flickered to the streak of yellow running on the wooden floor, blaring to only caress a mountainous peak at the cupboard that sat oppositely to the door. It managed to tiptoe into the room from the corridor. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Who was here?

Being part of Luca’s life had offered its inconveniences that some could not be able to adjust to; however, she had learnt and forced herself to grow accustomed to these points. There wasn’t a second that had passed before her fingers had tugged the Luca’s drawer, to grip around a pistol. His Italian accent which swam in his English trickled in her ears as if silk. Use this, just don’t shoot me.

As soon as her toes had peeked out of the blanket, she was out of the comfort of the warm bed. All she wanted to do was bury herself under the blankets she found solace in from the lonely days. Her only constant and present accompany. Kisses of freezing snowflakes bit into the soles of her feet, numbing her towards the icy path towards the light as if a frozen lake.

Swirling around her exposed leg, the nightgown she had worn did not bother to cover much of her skin as the hem of the silky peach rested on her thighs if she was to tiptoe, the frigid air caused bumps to salute, greeting with discipline. With a faint, not so much, creak, the door cried as it tried its best to not confide her awakening presence.

After the soles of her feet could no longer pass the electricity stabbing of the frozen ground, her arms were agile to scour around the office as soon as she entered the room. There was no one. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she breathed in the calming signature smell of Luca’s office.

The mahogany table that resided in the middle of the room, over a rich, red, Turkish carpet, was surrounded by palatial bookshelves that had been filled with books that could kill with a hurl, Y/N was sure she had never seen the Italian graze his hand over a page. Not once had he bothered to read the books whose spines were as large as her palm. It was a method for him to intimidate guests.

The bookshelves towered until its head had brushed over the ceiling, just like Luca’s head at the low door at his mother’s house. Splattered against the table were sheets of paper while stacks of them had been piled in one corner; a random object of choice thrown over the stack to ground it.

She chuckled once she realized it was a small trinket she had purchased for him. It was a miniature ceramic cat whose tummy laid against the ground, stretching extensively. She had bought it while she had sauntered down the road. Although it was not on her list of things she needed, she had found it amusing. What a gift to give to the leader of a mafia. Y/N assumed the papers displayed on the desk were of no use as the man would not risk anything by doing such a careless act.

Her thumb snapped the lamp off, switching off the only available light source in the room. The smear of yellow that radiated the room was engulfed in pitch black with streaks of grey from the two windows. Sometimes, she wondered how he could tolerate the strain of his eyes to such low, dim light.

No matter how many times she had insisted or offered the idea to install better lightings, the mobster hadn’t budged. Days she would consider casual would be finding him perched on his creaking seat while his hands jotted down so quickly, it seemed as if the memory would spring out of his head.

Thrown over his chair was a plain dress shirt. It seemed he was in a hurry as the clothing was close to the edge to meet with the ground. As she chewed on her bottom lip, she contemplated if it was a good idea. The gentle cloth engulfed her fingers. It had still smelt like him. A linger of whiskey swirled in with the toned-down cologne he would spray an obnoxiously large amount onto himself. He wouldn’t mind, he has a sole closet dedicated to his dress shirts.

With a swift movement, the sleeves entrapped her arms, defending her from the cold breeze. A good few inches had elongated from her fingers, the hem stooped below her nightgown. The closest she’ll get with Luca for the night.

After she placed the gun back, she stumbled back into the heated sheets. Her eyes shut tight as the collar grazed over her nose. The smell of him was stronger on the shirt than that of the bed. If only he had been there.

The Italian let out a muffled grumble that had been a mixture of exhaustion and frustration. Although he had hoped the locked front door would block him off from all the pending works and meetings, the presence of his office had rested with stacks of vital work. All of them were equally important; he hated it.

As his hand ran down his face, he flicked the wooden match that had been chopped in his lips. The butt of the stick possessed permanent scars from his teeth that had bitten into it. Damn cops. It landed on the marble counter with a clash before the still air engulfed the sound.

Exhaustion drowned over his muscles, seeping through his tissues with dread, the need for sleep lingered in his eyes. It had been mentioned a couple of times. Scratch that, everyone had brought it up. From his mother to the bellboy.

Glancing at the window that towered over the rest of the city with its graph-like buildings, a smear of the sun against the blue sky teased him. It taunted him. It reminded him that he had not slept through the night while it did.

Without a second wasted, he yanked off his coat, followed by the jacket and his vest which had begun to suffocate him. Tugging his tie as he thought about the commotion that had happen on a port was enough to rip his neck, he hurled it haphazardly as if throwing a ball for a dog to fetch. Who knew where it had landed. The clanking of his shoes met with the wooden floor. A mess Y/N would scold him for; a mess he will have to clean up.

Passing his office, his fingers gripped around the wavy doorframe to gaze at the room. He rummaged through the tight pocket of his trousers to tug out a sheet of crumpled paper that had been given to him with importance.

Luca let out a scoff before hurling it onto his desk. Even though he had few dealings that need to be checked, most of them are minor issues, but here he was, having to be the one to handle the problem with infant gangs who had risen in the city of New York.

A battle in his head roared, his eyes grazed over the polished table that sang a voice in his head. He turned around. If he was to accomplish work and complete them with perfection because that is how he liked to do things, he would need sleep.

Dragging himself to his bedroom, his fingers rubbed into his eyes, stabbing the orbs back in its socket. He nearly stumbled on his steps when his eyes grazed over the resting figure that slumbered peacefully. Her shoulders heaved up and down, the previous dress shirt he had worn had been draped over her shoulder.

Taking the whole of the bed, Y/N’s head plunged in the middle of the two pillows. She had left him only a small amount of space to sleep, or curl in a ball. Although he knew that he should’ve jumped to the shower before jumping in bed, he didn’t have enough energy to even run the water.

After shoving his suspender onto his side table, followed by the clanking of his golden rings that had engraved an indent into his fingers, marking him, he finally could breathe as only one layer covered his body.

“I don’t have space.” Luca’s silvery words fell into her snoozing ears. As his fingers clutched around her silky nightgown under his shirt, his thumb caressed her waist. He assumed that she had fallen asleep, however, it was proved wrong once a vague ‘mhm’ was uttered out of her lips. Without disrupting her slumber, he laid beside her, legs weaved and tangled like an irritating lock of hair.

“You smell.” A chuckle fell off his lips, his large hand splayed against her back, pulling her into his arms. With his chin propped on her head, his arms around her waist, he breathed in the sense of ease. This is home.

“Want to get in the bath with me?” A series of giggles and laughter echoed in the rising morning as the two-paced their routine, not bothered to sync with that of the pacing world.

[sandwichrin]

A Little into You (Kim Junkyu x Reader fanfic) (Ch. 2)

Word count: 1.9k words

Genre: Fanfiction, PG13, Comedy, Romance.

Author’s note: Hi! Chapter 2 is up! I made it shorter than the first chapter but I feel like this is good progress for the story :3 I hope you guys enjoy reading this chapter! <3

Chapter 2 - Rumor Has It.

“How?” You looked at him with both your eyebrows furrowed.

“You can use my shirt here.” He pointed to the green plaid button-up shirt tied around his waist. (Note: Imagine the plaid dark green shirt he wore tied around him in the Going Crazy Vertical Cam Version)

“Oh…” Your eyes roamed down to the plaid shirt tied around his hips. You blinked a few times. You were clearly confused on what was going on. It’s only 9.30am in the morning and yet so many things have happened to you today!

Hyunsuk saw the thoughtful look you had, your eyes not looking into his. He felt sorry for you. He really does. As much as how he felt that you getting peed on by a cat was funny—he really did feel sorry for you for having to go through something so dramatic early in the morning.

Hyunsuk hurriedly unravelled his plaid shirt from his waist and held it out to you. “Look, it’s not dirty or anything, if that’s what you’re worried of…”

Your head instantly snapped up and looked at him. That wasn’t what you had in mind at all! There was no way you would ever judge him of being dirty in any way. If at all, you felt that you were the one about to dirty his shirt by wearing it.

You shook your head, “No, no! I don’t mean that! I just…am still overwhelmed with what just happened. That’s all.”

Hyunsuk gave you a smile. “No worries. Here, take this. You can use the public restroom in the convenience store too. They won’t mind.” He pointed to the store where you ran off to yesterday.

You looked at the store which was located on the other side of the road. You smiled timidly at Hyunsuk, “Thanks…really. You didn’t have to though.”

Hyunsuk shoved the shirt into your hands, forcing you to take it since you wouldn’t take it from his hands. “Just go change. I want to help you. Isn’t this what we call humanity?”, he smiled again.

You scoffed. This guy really knows how to use his words! Humanity? You laughed a little. “Okay fine. Thank you, again. I’ll return it to you once I washed it though. Deal?” You held out a hand for him to shake.

“Deal!”Hyunsuk said as he shakes your hand.

“Alright then. I’ll be going now. You better hurry inside too. You must be busy or something.”

“Yeah, or something.” He grinned at you before waving goodbye as he walked inside the big building.

You on the other hand, hurriedly went to change out of the urine-reeked blouse you were wearing. Omg! It literally reeks of pee! How did I even talk to him smelling like this?! You mentally face-palmed yourself for not realising how you made him have to stand and talk to you whilst you smell like literal urine.

Hyunsuk’s green plaid shirt looked like a semi-formal outfit now that you tucked it into your black pencil skirt. Another thing you were grateful of was that how lucky you were the cat didn’t spray its pee onto your skirt as well. Taking out your bottle of perfume that you always carry in your tote bag, you spray it onto you a few times to get the pee stench out of you.

“Alright. Off to work.” You made sure all your stuff was with you, (including the soiled shirt, tucked into a paper bag you had asked from the store’s kind cashier) before leaving for your job that was located a block away from where you were.

                                                                  *

 “Wow, you look different today. I never knew you had anything green in your closet, y/n,” your colleague said as she saw you walk through the office door.

“Oh. Oh yeah, this isn’t something I usually wear.”

“Yeah but green looks good on you. You should wear it more often,” she said before swinging her chair back to focus on the PC monitor on her desk.

You smiled a little. Okay maybe you’ll add on some green into your closet one day. You walked over to your desk and started up your computer. You had some online activities to prepare for your classes. You worked on it diligently as the day passed.

                                                                  *

 It was afternoon and the rest of the boys were already in the practice room. They were all practicing their new song’s choreography, all sweaty and face red from the movements they made without any breaks as they wanted to get it down right. The song played 4 more times as they still practiced the moves, when by the end of it, Jeongwoo voiced out, “Hyung, can we take a break? I can’t hear myself scream that high note again, seriously, I might break that song player,”

Jihoon snickered at the younger boy’s whine. “Alright all, time out! 30 minutes break!” he called out loudly.

Jeongwoo cheered loudly and ran towards his water bottle at the corner of the room.

Yedam wiped his sweat off with the back of his hand. “Can we take an hour off instead hyung? It’s almost lunchtime anyways,” he bargained.

Jihoon turned to look at Hyunsuk who was on the floor, tying up his shoelaces that kept coming off during their practice. “Hyunsuk-hyung, what do you think?”

“Just let them take break til lunchtime is over. They’ve worked hard today,” he said, hands still busy tying up the shoelaces.

“Alright then. BREAKTIME TIL LUNCH IS OVER GUYS!” Jihoon yelled out loud for all his kids to hear him.

“YAYYYYYYY!” Loud cheers formed in the room. Jihoon and Hyunsuk smiled watching the boys shuffle out of the room, all being loud and excited with the extra break they’re getting from both their leaders.

Jihoon sat down next to Hyunsuk, who was finally done with his shoelaces. Hyunsuk stretched out his arms and lay down on the cold floor.

“You’re not going out for lunch hyung?” Jihoon asked.

“I will. In a bit. Let me just rest here for a while.”

“Alright then. I’ll go with you then.” Jihoon joined Hyunsuk on the floor.

The both of them stared at the ceiling of the practice room quietly, both immersed in their own thoughts.

“Today, something funny happened…”Hyunsuk started speaking.

Jihoon turned his head to Hyunsuk. “Yeah? What happened?”

Hyunsuk smiled to himself, recalling the incident that happened that morning with you. “Gosh, you’ll never believe me if I tell you,” he lets out a laugh.

Jihoon rested his head against his palm, ready to listen what the older guy beside him has to share.

Hyunsuk looked at Jihoon. He sat up and hugged his knees close to his chin. “Okay but Hoon, to be honest, have you ever….seen a cat pee on a person before?”

Jihoon shot him a confused look. “What?”

Hyunsuk felt like he wanted to laugh just saying it but he still wanted to share what had happened to you today even though Jihoon had no idea who you were. (Neither does Hyunsuk but he clearly knew what happened to you today lol)

“Stop smiling goofily to yourself omg! Just tell me what happened!” Jihoon said, growing impatient. He sat up from his spot as well and crossed his legs.

“Alright, alright.” Hyunsuk composed himself. “Earlier today…I saw…a girl getting peed on by a cat…”

Jihoon looked at his hyung weirdly. “What? Wait- what no I don’t get it.”

“Noooo! It’s true, there was a girl outside the building today, and she got peed on by a stray cat! I’m not making this up!”

Jihoon chuckled. “No way! That’s so…”

“Unbelievable right? I didn’t think cats could do that too! But omg-“ Hyunsuk started laughing, “Omg the girl! You should’ve seen the clueless look on her face! She looked so done, so lost,” he said as he laughs out loud.

Jihoon smiled at his hyung. “So, you met a girl today?”

Hyunsuk stopped laughing. “Really? That was all you caught from my story? You weren’t even interested with the part where the cat peed on a human being??”

Pushing his hair to the back with one hand, Jihoon responds, “Come on hyung. You know we don’t have much encounters with girls so this is quite a catchy point to take from your story don’t you think?”

Hyunsuk rolled his eyes at his friend. “Okay fine, fair point. But still, isn’t it funny?”

Smiling, Jihoon nodded. “Yeah funny.”

Hyunsuk smiled widely. “Man, if you were there you would’ve laughed out loud right at her face though.” He glanced at Jihoon, “Yup, you would be that kind of guy,” he snickered.

Jihoon swatted Hyunsuk’s arm. “Hey! I would have been very nice okay. I would’ve helped her.”

Hyunsuk raised an eyebrow at Jihoon.

“Okay fine! Maybe I’ll have a good laugh before I help her.”

Hyunsuk grinned at Jihoon. “I knew you would.”

Rolling his eyes, Jihoon asked Hyunsuk, “So, did you help her?”

“Yeah, I did actually.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I lent her my plaid shirt so she could go change. I mean, I couldn’t just let her walk to work wearing piss covered shirt, no?”

“The green one? That plaid one?” Hyunsuk nodded. “Aw come on nooo! I like that green plaid shirt of yours!”

“Hey! I had no other choice okay. I couldn’t take this shirt off my body in public and hand it to her, could I?” Hyunsuk gestured to the shirt he was wearing at the moment.

Jihoon laughed at his hyung. “That would’ve been hilarious to be honest.”

Hyunsuk motioned towards his dongsaeng. He wanted to pinch this guy for teasing him this much.

Jihoon evaded Hyunsuk’s hands from pinching him and ran further from him. “No wonder you look less fashionable today hyung!” he said whilst he laughed and ran at the same time.

“Come here you! Stop teasing!” Hyunsuk yelled as he chased after Jihoon around the room.

                                                                    *

 As usual, at 5pm you prepared to clock out from work. You made sure the stacks of books on your table were neatly arranged before beeping your card at the machine located opposite the exit of your office.

Walking back to your apartment, you passed by your usual route. And as usual, you passed by the convenience store on your right….and that same intimidating building on your left. Usually, you would’ve walked by without thinking much about the building, except that it’s intimidating for its reputation and size—but this time, today, your steps stopped when you passed by it briefly.

Your eyes lurked at the building. You wonder what it’s like inside it. How are the people inside it too?

You looked at the spot where the incident from this morning happened. How did something so ridiculous happened there? And right in front of Hyunsuk- THE CHOI HYUNSUK of Treasure. You mentally facepalmed yourself. This is certainly something you would remember of for a long long time.

Your eyes travelled to your arm. Your arm hugged by the sleeves of Hyunsuk’s shirt.

How is he so nice to a stranger? What if I was a sasaeng fan? What if I was the kind of person to sell off the things he gave me on eBay to get some profit from his fans??

Okay but you’re not that kind of person. He’s lucky you weren’t. You turned around and proceeded to go back home. You couldn’t wait to wash the shirt he lent you and return it to him.

 To be continued...

[alilbihh]

hocus pocus — 2

masterlist  previous part  next part

pairing: maknae line x reader

summary: jungkook wags his tail and his eyes look like truffles. jimin drinks blood out of juice boxes and bendy straws and tries to wink but ends up blinking both his eyes closed. taehyung likes the ocean and all kinds of art and apologizes to rocks. you don’t know if they want to take you out the date way or the assassination way and somehow you think it’s both.

genre: werewolf!jungkook, vampire!jimin, hybrid!taehyung, witch!reader; humor (??); poly!au (in the future!)

words: 7.2k

You don't really know how you got roped into this.

Maybe you hadn't. Maybe Namjoon drank a luck potion that day and managed to get through to you. Maybe he used one of his manipulative tactics on you that he seems to do to all his customers. ("Or maybe you're soft," you hear Namjoon say. You smack him upside the head).

But it's not all bad. His shop smells like sage and rosemary and butter cookies and something soft all around, so that the edges are safe enough to press against. You wonder if your own store smells this homey to other people.

The whole store is like a library. The walls can barely even be considered walls anymore, stacked from top to bottom with books - most with cracked spines, well-worn pages and a musty smell that spoke of ages long past. No low hanging vines or roses gossiping to the nearby hydrangeas and no Jungkook trotting around in oversized clothes.

There's none of that, but when you close your eyes you can almost feel a gentle breeze, the muted buzz of cicadas, a bird fluttering somewhere overhead, as if you hadn't stepped inside a building at all. Namjoon's store is a different kind of gentle. Like something wise hangs in the air, just out of reach.

There are random items scattered about, and you remember what Namjoon once told you. How his store is dedicated to the lost. Objects that they value most are scattered about neatly. There's an assortment of jewelry and photos and family heirlooms and paintings. You smile lightly at the wedding rings and grimace at the less than decent items. (There are more dildos than one would think).

Sometimes people wander inside without remembering what inclined them to do so, drawn to items they don't remember they'd lost and items they'd been searching their whole lives for. Objects appear without warning, waiting to be found by the lost. It's how Namjoon met Seokjin. It's how the two met the ginger cat that walked in one day and has been here so long Namjoon even named him.

("I say we call him Ginger." You'd suggested, your cheek pressed to their horribly uncomfortable couch, and you immediately feel claws digging into your back.

"The cat hates it," Seokjin says, popping a cheeto into his mouth with conviction.

Namjoon nods solemnly, "It is kind of a terrible name," he admits.

"OH!" You say with mock surprise, twisting your head like they do in those terrible horror movies just to glare at Namjoon. "What an interesting opinion, soundcloud user Runch Randa."

Seokjin cackles and the cat makes a strange choking sound, almost like it's laughing too. Namjoon's ears flush red.

The weight momentarily disappears from your back, only to reappear seconds later. "Oh, yep, that's a male alright."

"Jin-hyung!" Namjoon yelps, horrified, "You can't just- just do that without asking!"

"Joon, babe, it's a cat. I'll say please next time, okay?")

It was then decided that his name would be Kimbap. He's grown a bit chubbier than before, and you wonder what Seokjin has been feeding him for that to happen so quickly.

The silence reminds you of why you're here in the first place. ("I'm being used."

"NO you are NOT! Just- think of it as a favor to your old pal Namjoon."

"You're insufferable.")

You've mostly been idling around the counter so far, only helping the middle aged lady that had walked in a few hours back. She'd been drawn to a pair of old baby shoes. "I tried selling them once. My husband didn't let me." She smiled lightly, the shoes small and snug and delicate as they sat in the palm of her hands. "They've never been worn, after all."

She walked out without another word, and for a moment too long you wondered how brave Namjoon must be to hear these stories every day.

"Hello?" A tiny voice whispers, a lilting tone of wonder. You search around and spot the tip of a head by the edge of the counter, wild strands sticking out every which way. Leaning forward reveals a little girl just barely shorter than the counter, chubby cheeks and all as she makes grabby hands at you. "Are you a witch?" She asks with stars in her eyes.

"Why, yes I am!" You grin, and in a blink and a snap of your fingers the lights overhead turn off, the candles' flames flickering alight one by one. She stares on in wonder, mouth agape.

It's then you're reminded of your true reason of being here.

"Would you like your future told?"

To lie to children, that is.

You have no idea how to work this thing.

The crystal ball is perched on some sort of decorative table centerpiece that Namjoon likely found on Walmart, and if the crystal ball itself has any magical properties you certainly don't know how to make use of them. It's colored a charming, rustic gold that you're not sure whether is spray painted or natural but it's pretty all the same.

Nevertheless, making up people's futures has been fun. The cheery little werewolf girl is too energetic and will likely hurt herself in the near future if she's too careless. The human with the pigtails will find love soon in the most unconventional of places. The bratty fox hybrid boy that kicked your shin is straight up going to end up in jail (but will find someone to help him through his struggles, you added just for his parents not to potentially sue you).

Namjoon walks in at some point just as you're done performing a magic trick on a wide eyed boy that's no older than nine, the highest form of magic you can perform, most likely. He leaves with a skip in his step, little daisy tucked into his shirt pocket. Purity and innocence.

The real store owner watches the little boy leave softly before turning towards you with a raised brow.

"Namjoon, my man! Are you finally here to save me?" You cheer, clasping your hands together. The traitor in question pats your head softly, and you instantly deflate.

"Not yet, Y/n-ah, just here to get something." He says with his back turned to you, climbing the ladder on the wall in search of a book, much like Belle does in Beauty and the Beast. Namjoon is both the beauty and the beast, in this case. Your instincts tell you to run while his back is turned, but something tells you that you won't get too far before someone inevitably finds and snitches on you because you're surrounded by traitors.

"You came all this way to get a book?" You ask, stupefied.

"Spell book. I gotta be quick though, Jin-hyung says that I'm on bathroom cleaning duty if I don't hurry up."

You laugh at that, "You know he'll just find a way to make you clean the bathroom anyway, right?"

"Yeah. I hate him. He's the devil."

"He's your boyfriend."

He sighs, a fond thing. "Yeah." And that's that.

Kimbap climbs onto the counter with ease, despite how chunky he's gotten. You pat him solemnly as you glare at Namjoon with all your might.

"Mind telling me what you're doing that's important enough to have me be here, lying to innocent children?" You quip, looking away from your glaring to coo at Kimbap nuzzling into your hand.

"You're actually quite good at reading people. The ball does look like you don't know how to use it, though," he says as he pulls out a book that's so thick it's more of a dictionary than anything. "The ball is sad." He adds.

"The ball doesn't have feelings."

"It doesn't," Namjoon agrees as he slides down the ladder, and for a second you worry for his safety as his knees wobble when he reaches the ground, book safely in hand. "It's not the ball that has magic. It's the air that does. Everything that does. The world is magical, holds more magic than you'd think, you just have to be the one to look for it. The ball is more of a handy tool." He grins and for a second he looks too wise. Too grown. Something about his tone makes you feel like he knows more than he's letting on. It makes you feel small.

"You wanna take a peek into my future, then?" You ask, and you're answered by a pair of knee-deep dimples.

"Can't. Tried once, unintentionally. The memories are all fuzzy." He looks a bit too happy as he says it. A little too fond.

"What does that mean?"

He pats your head again as he leaves, answers over his shoulder, "It means I'm in your future." The muted buzz of cicadas and fluttering of birds and the gentle breeze are ever so present as Namjoon opens the glass doors, steps into the outside. "Your future is awfully warm, though," he adds right before leaving, right before he trips over the doorstep and nearly falls face first into the concrete. He rights himself, stepping out calmly as if it never happened. You're too bewildered to laugh.

"I think it was destiny? Like, it wasn't my lack of housing options that brought us together. I think Y/n's, like, my soul-roommate."

Bright robes rustle as Seokjin props his elbow on the counter, resting his chin on his hand with a sigh. Jungkook flinches when the older male's too-large wings skim at the edge of a nearby bookshelf, and it rocks back and forth for a second too long before regaining its balance. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Jungkook takes a good look at his very much angelic friend, the man in question squinting his eyes suspiciously at him.

"So you mean your soulmate?" He says, voice flat, eyes narrowed.

"No, hyung," Jungkook exasperates, "My soul-roommate. As in, I wanna be her roommate forever."

Seokjin squints. Downs his glass of water as if it were vodka.

Now, Seokjin could tell it like it is right now and rid Jungkook of his stress like wringing out a washcloth, fast and easy and with little repercussions. But Seokjin will not. Seokjin will let this drag on until the man figures out what do himself.

This isn't the kind of decision he can make, anyway. "Alright. That's nice, Jungkook-ah."

"Yeah! Yeah. It is." Jungkook picks up a broom Seokjin's wings had knocked over, apologizes quietly to it before placing it back against the wall.

The angel drums his hands on the wooden counter, looking up in thought. "And what about that Jimin fellow?"

Jungkook trips over his own feet on his way to the tray of crystals, and the older laughs almost maniacally at him. "What about him?" Jungkook slurs.

"Nothing, nothing, I've seen enough." He says with a laugh, wings fluttering in delight with a mind of their own.

Jungkook huffs indignantly, reaches for a nearby crystal colored a soft purple, begins polishing it aggressively with his apron. It warms in his palm, like it's been resting near a fire.

"Who's that?" Jungkook's ears perk at Jin's soft exclamation, and he looks out the window curiously.

There's a deer hybrid by the door.

The buck looks through the glass with an almost childlike curiosity, eyes lighting up like a fire. Something inclines him to walk in like it does with every customer, so he does; bending a bit so his antlers fit through the door frame, and Jungkook can't help but consider the gesture to be the most adorable thing.

The boy's sneakers squick, squeak, squish as he steps further into the building, marveling at the tiny expanse of the shop Jungkook considers his home. A lone bulb hangs by the shelves of poetry, its glow muted until the boy steps in to read some of the spine titles. Jungkook can't help but feel like the room has gotten a tad bit warmer, a tad bit brighter.

The werewolf watches the hybrid pad towards the tray of crystals. Some of them are raw and jagged and the size of his palm; others are smooth and fitting enough to be made into a necklace, maybe even a pair of earrings. The boy reaches for a purple one buffed into an oval, marvels at it before pressing it to his chest.

"Do you like purple?" Jungkook asks once he gets close, laughs as the boy jumps. He continues, "Amethyst. It's pretty. It cleanses one's energy field of negative influences and is known to relieve stress and dispel anger, fear, and anxiety. Also alleviates sadness."

The hybrid stares at him. The hybrid stares at him because there's a werewolf talking about energy as if it's a tangible thing and telling him rocks have magical properties. "Rocks can't do that."

"Hey!" Jungkook yelps, grabs at a nearby rock, holds it close to his chest, "You can't call them rocks. They're crystals, crystals." 

"Oh." the buck blinks once, twice. He stares at the not-rock in his hand. Pats it a little bit. "Sorry."

"s'okay."

The boy looks small tucked into his jacket like that, and Jungkook watches as he fiddles with the zipper a bit, holds it between his fingers. "You work here?" The boy asks as softly as a voice can get, walking past a lamp that warms to life beside him.

"Yeah- yeah! I do. Work here, that is." Jungkook replies, just as soft, working at a loose thread on the hem of his shirt. The boy's gaze is so so warm. Something urges Jungkook to shift his gaze to the ground and the other can't look away.

Jungkook laughs lightly as the boy sneezes suddenly, sniffles and rubs at his nose. "Is it the smell? It's quite a lot, isn't it? It messed with me in the beginning, too." He adds, tone a little too fond.

"Ah, yeah, I guess. Smells strong here, but, like. Nice." The boy says, steps in close to a vase filled with orchids and lilies and peonies and gardenias; femininity, purity, love, trust. He feels as a leaf curls around his outstretched finger like it's inviting him closer, welcoming him home. And he laughs, softly, like he can hear the flowers' hushed whispers.

"What do you think flowers talk about?" He mutters, and Jungkook almost flusters at the low rasp of his voice. Daegu, it comes to the werewolf all at once. Daegu boy. Jungkook's struck with the thought that he's never been to Daegu but it kinda already feels like home.

"Uh. I don't know. I've done some embarrassing things in front of them, so. Probably that."

The other laughs, movements syrupy slow as he stands up straight, antlers towering over the werewolf's form. Jungkook kinda wants to touch it. Kinda wants to touch all of him. Kinda wants to drown himself in the other's voice, the rough low of it, kinda wants to get his lips sticky with it. "Looks like they like you, though," he adds.

"I guess I'm just too charming, huh?" The boy says and then does something incredible. Something so mind boggling and out of place and so so endearing it has Jungkook's heart do something uncertain in his chest; an inverted beat, everything backwards, all the blood pumping the wrong way.

The boy winks.

Oh no.

Jungkook makes a weird noise from the back of his throat and he guesses there's something on his face because in just a second the boy laughs, laughs so hard it's like his heart is trying to crawl its way out his chest, like it's too big for him to hold on his own. It's beautiful. Jungkook wants to live in that sound, listen to it for hours on repeat like a broken radio.

It seems that's when the magic breaks because the boy remembers he's here to do business and takes notice of the weight in his hand, looks down at the crystal in his palm. "How much is this?"

Jungkook blinks. "Oh. I don't know. Y/n's responsible for that kinda stuff." He suddenly smiles, cheekily adding, "guess it's free!"

A laugh tumbles out the boys' lips, big and unreserved. Jungkook thinks he's just like that. Open and honest, easily able to light up a room with just a smile. "I can't just take it for free," he says as he places it back on the tray where he'd taken it.

"Sure you can! I'm encouraging it!"

The boy shakes his head, gaze flickering back to the crystal on the tray. He remembers how warm it felt on his palm, fitting like it belonged.

"Can crystals really heal you?" He asks, looking at the werewolf from beneath his lashes. He continues and the words don't feel like they're his, like someone's plucking them from out of him, "It just. Doesn't make sense. For it to be that easy, I mean."

Jungkook smiles and it melts the boy down to his bones. The younger boy picks up the crystal, tap tap taps at it like it'll give him the answers he needs. Offers it with an outstretched hand and a knowing smile. "They can heal you if you believe they can." Jungkook rolls his eyes with a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, "Just take it, you nerd."

Daegu boy bites his lips cherry red. "Yeah. Yeah, okay," Taehyung's so close Jungkook can see flecks of gold in his eyes, like leftover traces of the sun. He takes the crystal. And then in a blink he's gone, hands in his pockets as he trudges back out the way he came, "I'm Taehyung, by the way!"

"I'm Jungkook!" A goofy smile and a silly wave. The boy waves back. Ends up hitting his antlers on the doorway, backtracks with his head clutched in hands, and Jungkook openly laughs.

The boy leaves and the werewolf is struck with the thought that maybe he falls in love way too easily.

Something about today feels slightly off and you have no idea what it is.

Maybe it's just the lumpiness of the bed. Not the actual bed, just the jacket Jungkook had left laying around that's currently digging into your back as you lay lifelessly on your bed. You think you're having a crisis, a midlife crisis at the peak of your adulthood. And that's cool. That's fine. Totally normal and not at all disconcerting.

You feel a shadow tower over your body, and you peel open an eye to spot the very familiar that's causing your back such anguish, his brow cocked with purpose. "Why do you look like that?"

"huh?" you hum, and you think you're blinking but it's like someone is doing it for you, like you're drifting in and out of consciousness. "Look like what?"

He snorts like the answer is obvious, and it probably is. "Like someone just told you your ass is flat."

"That is rude and I am offended." You say without a hint of anger in your voice, and you briefly think of how that's probably your normal tone with Jungkook. Kinda soft and kinda playful and a fondness hidden just under your tongue, trying to wriggle its way out.

Jungkook says something akin to noona, do you want me to tie your hair for you? and noona, are you going to hyung's party? and noona, did you brush your teeth today? all at once, and at first you're mildly offended at the last one before you swipe your tongue over the front of your teeth and realize you haven't.

Then his words somewhat catch up to you and your brows furrow in question, "What party?"

"Ah. Namjoon-hyung's and Seokjin-hyung's. Something about an anniversary of theirs, but it's been less than a year? So I don't really know what they're celebrating? I think it's a pre-one-year-anniversary-party. Which is stupid because why don't they just celebrate it when it's actually been a year? I don't know. It's kinda wild."

You laugh at that, sitting up groggily and it's then that your familiar releases a little shriek, "Yikes! Do you want me to hire an exorcist? I think there's, like, three of them just around the block, I can run and get them for you!"

Your feet pad over the somewhat cold floor, and you slap the man's chest as you pass him by, his laughter following you on your way to the bathroom, and you can hear his tail bumping wildly against the wall as it wags carelessly.

At some point while you're brushing your teeth Jungkook pads lightly beside you, joining you with a toothbrush of his own. You're both staring at each other from your reflections in the mirror and you try to give him a smile but it results in toothpaste dribbling down your chin and Jungkook laughs so hard he spits a bit on the mirror.

Some odd sense of peace engulfs you then and it feels oddly dreamy, like an early morning breeze. Jungkook opens the windows to let some fresh air in while he makes sleepy sounds and you just kind of sit there, looking but not seeing, thinking of nothing and everything.

It's an early friday and the shop won't open for another two days so you have nothing to do but you feel like you do. You think it's the stress getting to you but you're not sure if that's it. You wonder if maybe Namjoon's psychic powers are contagious and your third eye has opened without your knowledge.

You watch as Jungkook pads over to your shared kitchen; the one that doesn't have your cauldron and your stove and your potions like the one just downstairs by the shop does. In fact, this one doesn't have a stove at all. Sometimes Jungkook walks all the way down to the other kitchen just to make proper food because it's not like you have the money to buy another stove, anyway. ("Jungkook we don't have a stove how are you going to make chicken nuggets?"

"But I have a lighter and determination."

"This is a bad idea and you're going to regret it.")

(He regretted it.)

Actually, you're not quite sure when Jungkook started living here. You can barely even remember how it was before Jungkook, when it was just you living alone in the apartment right above your dainty little shop, and now you can't imagine waking up without his sleepy sounds and your playful banter. It feels surreal. You wonder if it will last. You want to wish that it will, but you wonder if it's selfish.

You come to at the tragic sight of the familiar in question aggressively pouring cereal into his bowl, the milk already inside splashing around in waves. You sigh and stand up, the couch beneath you squeaking in protest.

Jungkook smiles as you come to a stop beside him. "G'morning," he says so so softly, like it's the first time he sees you- pretty little grin, pretty little curve to his lips.

"hi." you say, just as soft. This is nice. Everything is nice and smells and feels like Jungkook; solid. Safe. A comfort.

"You wanna watch Your Name?" he asks suddenly into the open air, and you laugh quietly at his determined eyes.

"That's like your de-stressing mechanism."

"Hey, it's valid."

And so it's a quiet friday morning. Jungkook has Kiki's Delivery Service queued and he's hoping there will be time to watch Ponyo like he's wanted to for so long and the afternoon will pass by like that, the two of you sitting around and watching movies and nature documentaries and tossing popcorn kernels at each other- sometimes with purpose, other times without.

Jungkook speaks up somewhere between shrimps being able to see colors we don't even know exist and lizards literally shooting blood out their eyes, and you turn away from the nature documentary to face him, "So are you going to that party? Jin-hyung said there'll be cake and mario kart and many people and stuff." He says before stuffing a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

You blink for a few seconds in thought because yes yes yes but no no no. Yes because you love your friends and you love being able to see them happy and you love seeing Namjoon lose to Jin at mario kart for the umpteenth time. But no because the last time you met a new person you almost fell in love with them so no, you will not be meeting anyone new for a while.

(Well, maybe not necessarily in love, you tell yourself. That seems excessive. More like a maybe-love. More like a I could love you, if you let me).

"I'll think about it," you lie through your teeth, and the werewolf pretends to be convinced as he flashes you a little smile that's knowing in a way that makes you feel a bit small.

"Okay," he says, shrugs, turns back to the TV that's now saying something about dolphins being insomniacs but you're too caught up in your familiar's nonchalance to pay any attention to it.

The couch is a lumpy disaster. A huge mistake. Possibly the biggest one of your life. You kinda wish couches had never been born as you try for the fifth time to adjust your legs only to fail miserably, settling for fiddling with your glass.

This is downright blasphemy. Outrageous. You don't know how you got here or what's happening, but Jungkook disappeared somewhere in the crowd and Jin is, as expected, beating some poor person's ass at mario kart, and Hoseok and Yoongi are getting a bit too intimate by the sugar cookie icing, and you think the punch you're drinking has more alcohol than you were accounting for.

You think you should chew the gummy worms that are mixed into the punch better because there are more than a few instances in which you forget they're in there and end up choking on them. But it's fine because the home you're in smells like scorched firewood and maple syrup and Kimbap is sitting beside you on the couch, dressed very politely and with a little bow tie tied to his collar.

You'd tried to get up once, tried to face the crowd. Tried to face Jungkook's admittedly inevitable betrayal. There were plenty of faces you recognized, some you didn't, and at some point you were trying to push through the people cheering for Seokjin when your hand brushed over someone's chest; pecs. Pecs means Jungkook.

He took one look at your face and quite literally dived and disappeared into the crowd to avoid your glare, and you pretend he's escaped your grasp even when you see his bumbling form run into the kitchen three seconds later.

So here you are, back on the lumpy, overused couch of the infamous fiends that are Namjoon and Seokjin, petting their cat. Kimbap is a funny fellow. Always with his head held high, confident as he strides from one corner to the next and paws at your ankles for attention. You strive to be Kimbap.

"You have a good life," you say to the cat, petting lazily at his head. "Eat, sleep, some adventure, more sleeping, definitely more eating. You don't have to worry about love or being alone or - or rent."

Kimbap blinks, one eye then the other. Yawns. Promptly whacks the middle of your face with the tip of his tail. "Fucking punk," you mutter.

So you're at a party. You're never usually at parties, but the owners of the distasteful couch will have been together for one year as of three months from now, and you don't know why they don't just celebrate it three months from now when it's actually been a year, but the punch tastes bad enough to be considered good and Kimbap is nice enough company and everyone's having fun so you don't mind much.

"Why, hello there." A voice says from above you, and your shoulders stiffen and your grasp on the punch cup tightens.

You look up and it's Jimin. Jimin, the vampire. Jimin, Jungkook's crush. Jimin, a Raphaelite painting come to life, dark pants and a shirt with so many buttons undone it can't even be considered a shirt, more like a suggestion of one.

He plops on the couch beside you just as Kimbap scrambles away- another traitor- and you look away from his collarbones to see the boy grinning, openly and unabashedly, fangs and all. He's definitely not alcohol drunk. He's drunk off something a little more intangible, maybe.

"Look," he mutters but you're already looking. At his eyes and his hands and his stupid eyelashes. Spider-leg long eyelashes. No one should feel this overwhelmed by eyelashes.

Jimin takes one look at you and promptly swallows his glass of vodka as if it were water. You think he's smiling when he turns to look at you again but you're looking at the ground, sinking deeper into the couch - cheeks aflame, human fondue. You think you can become one with the couch. Maybe it's not that bad. You pat it fondly.

The vampire laughs with his whole body, doubling over, almost toppling off the couch. Your breath hitches a bit but you try not to think too much about it. Try not to think about anything, really.

"The punch is good," you say lamely.

"No it isn't."

"No, it isn't." you agree, then down the punch in one go. You slam the empty glass on the armrest and feel your face contort with so much adamant disgust that Jimin laughs fully, and the sound is beautiful and incredibly - Jimin, you not-think.

You're still Not Thinking. It's actually amazing how much you're Not Thinking, you not-think. It's amazing what the human brain can do once you set your mind to it. There's so many things you're not thinking about! You're not thinking about how Jimin shuffles the tiniest bit closer to you, or how he leans into you fully when he laughs, or how he lights up the room with his laugh alone.

It's kind of a blur what happened after that. Jimin started talking about how kiwi is the worst of all fruits, and the conversation somehow diverts into the plot holes and the fall of capitalism, and then somehow- somehow- into slang terms for penis. ("I'm just saying that if someone were to approach me and tell me their wang is hard again I can and will block them from my life," he says with so much open hate it has you choking on a laugh).

You learn he volunteers at a nearby shelter.

You learn he, for some reason, thinks the O blood type is an actual abomination and should be burned for its sins. ("Nothing against people with O blood types, though, I'm sure they're lovely!" he makes sure to add.)

You learn he's been convinced by outside sources that Tony Stark is a raging feminist.

You learn he's beautiful and lovely and sometimes, when the light hits him just right, you can see flecks of red in his eyes.

Talking with Jimin is easy, really easy. You love words, but sometimes they're easier to say than others. You're surprised how easy they were to come out, how easy they were to say. You thought you would whisper them or they would get stuck in your throat. You thought you would slur them together or fracture them into too many. But with Jimin it's just easy, always so easy, he's always so patient and willing to listen.

Jimin is so tender, so pretty, lighting up a room without even realizing it. He's so bright. Bright enough for you to think this, this. This is why Jungkook likes him so much, and it's then that you slump backwards and every previously undiscovered lump reintroduces themselves to your butt. You were wrong, you take it back - the couch fucking sucks.

At some point it becomes so bright you had to excuse yourself, had to hide and curl in the nearest bathroom.

You're curled up in yourself on the toilet seat when a voice in your head tells you that you can't stay here forever. You have an assignment due monday. Jungkook will probably give out all the shop's products for free and adopt three more goldfish and a hamster and a golden retriever completely on impulse. Kimbap will probably miss you. Or not. Many times you don't know if he likes you or if he uses you for food and pats.

After a moment or two you stand up, fake a flush. Wash your hands, dry them. Dab some cold water on your neck. Wash your hands again. Dab some more water on the back of your neck, your forehead, your chest - anything to cool down. Wrists? Knees? Jungkook always puts some cologne there because of heat glands or something, but you're not sure if that has anything to do with him being a werewolf.

When you walk out it's with a confidence that you most certainly don't have, and you pretend you didn't just almost have a mental breakdown in the bathroom of your friend's almost-anniversary party as you walk back to the lumpy couch. Only this time it's not just Jimin.

This time it's Jimin talking so so tenderly to the boy next to him, little giggles spilling from his lips as he whispers into his ear, throwing himself onto the boy's shoulder and smiles at him with so much open adoration that your chest kinda ached a bit.

And it's not Jungkook like you expected - no. It's a boy. The boy. Honey boy. The boy that takes trains early in the morning and loves the ocean and loves his family before anything else. A split second and the boy smiles and then you know, you know it's the boy and not some sort of fever dream, some sort of hunger confusing your eyes and your brain and your heart. A smile all mirth and joy, one you think can't quite get captured right in a photograph. Boxy and bold and wild.

You turn back the way you came from and you think you hear someone calling after you but your brain is too hazy to make out what was said at all. You look around frantically for Jungkook, find him still hanging by the kitchen, drunk off the punch gummy worms and trying to pour some more into his cup but spilling half of it onto the kitchen counter.

"I'm leaving." You say to him, just to let him know, not because you expect him to follow you but because you expect him to worry when he searches and can't find you. You turn with the intention of leaving and he gently grabs your wrist, and you see something in his eyes - hazy and dreamy with alcohol and confusion and something else.

"Why? What's wrong? Did something happen?" He asks, tugs you forward gently to bring you closer, voice not reaching beyond a whisper, soft all around the edges.

"No no, nothing happened, please don't worry." You say, try to pry him off you just as gently, but he remains firm as he looks around for the potential threat that doesn't exist - doesn't exist, because you're making a big deal out of nothing, you know you are.

Because the boy you're already in love with is off limits and the two boys you just might have been almost in love with are together and you're a fool. The biggest fool. The biggest fool because you've almost just fallen for not one, not two, but three people, three people that are not at all interested, and you think there's something wrong with you that you're not quite ready to deal with just yet.

You look up and you see his jaw tighten, something akin to anger flicker in his eyes and no- no no no, you didn't mean for this to happen, didn't mean to ruin his night. "I'm going home, please don't worry about me and have fun. Please?"

He releases a breath and looks back down at you, expression softening so much it melts you down to your bones. "I won't let you go home like this. Let me walk you?"

You want to say no, want to let him have his fun, but he's looking at you with such quiet determination and you're just so, so tired. "okay," you say breathlessly.

You make sure to say goodbye to everyone before you leave, patting Namjoon extra hard on the back so that he stumbles forward with an oof. Jungkook's hand is on your back the whole time, a quiet reassurance.

You think you've done a pretty good job at avoiding them. It's kinda hard with Jungkook, since you live with him and all, but you try to eat your meals at separate times and avoid looking him in the eye when he gets too close. You take train rides at night now, just in case, try not to look at the ocean when you pass it by. Flinch so hard when you passed by an animal shelter that a kind old lady actually stopped to ask if you were okay.

There's kind of a box in your chest. It stores all the unwanted feelings, keeps them all at bay. But sometimes the box breaks. Breaks when you need it intact the most. Your box is crumpled, old, tearing at the seams, little bits and pieces spilling bit by bit until the day comes when they break out all at once, and you think the day gets closer the more you deal with things alone.

You think the day is today as a boy comes flying through the door, clothes and hair disheveled, and you think you look more than a bit petrified as the vampire you'd been avoiding for a few weeks launches towards you, smacks a few crumpled bills onto the counter.

"How do I say fuck you in flower?" He says, something wild threatening to tumble out of his chest as he inhales a shaky breath, and you scramble to gather the flowers for the bouquet, despite the oddity of the request.

Carnation, foxglove, meadowsweet; disdain, insincerity, uselessness. You add a daffodil in there just for the heck of it - new beginnings. Which is ironic, coming from you.

He watches as you tie the bouquet together, and there's something gentle about his gaze despite the fact your heart is threatening to tumble out of your chest and he looked seriously intimidating, like, two seconds ago.

You hand the bouquet over after tying a bow around its end and he takes it with a smile, walking out the door without even bothering to wait for his change. There's silence for a moment. Nothing. Then he walks right back in, bouquet still in hand, places it back on the counter and pushes it closer to you. You stare, stunned.

You make a weird noise and you think you've just keyboard smashed in real life because that's when Jimin loses all composure, laughing joyfully and clutching at his stomach.

"It's- for you," he says after a moment, gaze flickering from you to the bouquet then back to you then back to the bouquet.

"What did I do?" You ask but you know what you did. You straight up ran away from him. Straight up told him you were coming back and then you just didn't. Kinda ditched him there on the lumpiness of the couch, but you didn't think he would notice, didn't think he would remember anything that isn't related to honey boy - not that you'd blame him.

Jimin looks at you knowingly. You manage to hold his gaze for less than a second before looking down at your shoes.

"Do you wanna have dinner with us?" He's drawling. You think it's a nervous tic. "Me. Taehyung. Jungkook, too, if he wants." He says and looks at the door behind you, as if waiting for Jungkook to walk through it.

Ah, you think, mustering up a smile, so his name is Taehyung. "Taehyung," you say, testing how it sounds on your tongue.

"Yeah," he smiles something a little too fond, a little too endeared. "Taehyung."

"But- Me?" You fold your arms, shift on your feet, uncertainty lacing your every word, "You want me to go, too?"

Jimin looks a little too confused, a crease between his brows. The crease goes soft when he smiles or feigns surprise, but it never quite mushes away. You kinda wanna kiss him there one day.

"Of course I do. Why would I not?" A sludge that had been spreading through your insides seems to evaporate the tiniest bit at that, and you can almost feel your heart melting out of your chest, dripping over your ribs like cheese fondue.

"Oh," you mutter, and that's that.

Jimin smiles again and you wonder how he does it, how he manages to smile so much, if he ever gets tired of it. He fishes through his pocket for a moment, pulls out his phone. "Let's exchange numbers, yeah?"

And so you do. In complete silence. Please tell me what to say, you beg your shit brain, but it just continues the mantra of curse words on repeat. It's sunny and he's close to the window where the roses are giggling under their breaths, where the light is hitting him in all the right ways.

"What, no tips?" You ask the boy's back as he leaves, bouquet in hand and carrying it all too delicately, like someone who has a lot of love in his heart, and he's laughing over his shoulder as he opens the door.

"I gave you one last time!"

"That's not how it works!" You yell but he's already gone, leaving a trail of giggles in his wake.

"Are you serious? They invited us over for dinner?"

"Yeah," you say as you pick up a box with a huff, softening as Jungkook runs over to grab it from you. You mutter a thank you before continuing, "Is it that hard to believe?"

"Kinda!" He huffs but you're almost sure it's from mock anger than it is from carrying heavy boxes around, "We're going, right?"

"I don't know.." Your familiar gasps a bit too dramatically as he sets the box down on the counter.

"Noona, I'm pretty sure there's a law that states that you have to go to dinner when two attractive men ask you to."

"Source."

"Namjoon is the smartest person in the world and he confirms this."

"I confirm this." You jump as the man in question pops up behind you, and you have no idea how and when he got here.

You groan. "Fine."

Jungkook whoops loudly and Namjoon, despite not really knowing what's going on, joins in with the same amount of enthusiasm. It's incredibly endearing and you hate both of them.

[garbagevanfleet]

Learn To Leave A Room (series)

PART TWO 

Pairing: Jake & female!Reader Warnings: general sexiness, but nothing too risque yet Summary: Balancing relationships is hard work - God forbid someone throw a wrench into it. Notes:  oh my god, im sorry guys. sexual tension is my favorite thing in the whole world. 

MASTERLIST

“I am not ashamed, the story goes. I swear I will learn to leave a room without touching every part of your face.” — Marcelo Hernandez Castillo, “How to Grow the Brightest Geranium,” published in Breakwater Review

“Obviously you have to talk to him.” 

Despite being nearly noon, it’s still too early for this conversation. Lucy has dragged you back to the diner, hoping to nurse your collective hangovers with some coffee and a greasy breakfast, but all you had really wanted to do was crawl into your own bed.

“You can’t just leave things like they are. I mean, he is still your boyfriend until you actually break up with him, right?” she tries again. You know she’s right. She’s always so insightful about these kinds of things, and hung-over you is a little annoyed by her sound logic. 

You had told her a very selective recounting of what had happened last night, leaving out anything to do with Jake. You weren’t ever planning on telling her the rest.

You and Lucy had stayed over at the Kiszka residence, cuddled up together on the couch, but you - very luckily - did not have to see anyone else before you had left. 

“I know. I will eventually,” you assure, staring down at the half-eaten cheeseburger you ordered and wondering if you can take another bite. You opt instead to pick at it with your fork. “Mostly I want him to have to think about it all for a while. Get in his own head.”

She giggles at you. “Mind games,” she says in the way of agreement. She’s silent for a moment as you watch her stir her milkshake with her straw. “I’m sorry he did that to you. I could tell that you didn’t want to invite him; I shouldn’t have pushed you.”

You shake your head at her. “It’s so not your fault. I think it’s good that I figured out who he really is early on. You know, before I actually got to like him.”

“You didn’t really like him?” Her tone is sheepish. 

You shake your head. “It was fun at first, but no. I will miss the regular sex though,” you add, making her laugh. 

“Well, I guess you’ll have to just kick him to the curb and get back out there. You’re going to find someone that’s going to treat you right.”

You nod in agreement and give her a thankful smile, but somehow you feel that you won’t be joining the dating scene for a while. 

+++

Mitch never does text you, so you decide you won’t either. It feels a little unresolved, but you’re honestly grateful to not have to deal with the confrontation. He had never left anything at your house, and you hadn’t taken more than one or two pictures together, so you forget about him pretty easily.

You do feel anxious off and on, but you don’t think it’s from the breakup. You can’t quite put your finger on it, but you pick up an extra-long shift at the cafe to fill your time. Fall is the start of the busy season for baristas, so you very infrequently have a moment to dwell on anything at work. 

After a long day of steaming and steeping, you cannot wait to get home and wash off. The most you ever feel like yourself is in the shower - it’s always a mental cleansing process just as much as a physical one. Soft music starts to play from the speaker on the bathroom counter as you connect your phone. 

You turn the water to the perfect temperature to warm you up from the walk home, and it feels borderline euphoric as you step under the spray. You let the water wash over you, but the second you close your eyes, you snap them back open with an anxious feeling. 

You try it again. You lean back, close your eyes... but to the same result. 

You stand and stare blankly at the shower wall. 

“Fuck,” you breathe. Every time you close your eyes, all you can see is Jake looking back at you from across the living room. 

The lights on his face, the contrast of his dark hair against the white door frame - you can even hear the music that was playing. All of it. It’s haunting you.

You rub the heels of your palms into your eyes, trying to will it away, but you can’t stop your brain from playing the image back to you. 

“Fuck,” you whisper again, a bit more desperately this time and slump against the cold shower wall. You stay there, staring at the tile in front of you until you realize that the issue isn’t going to go away. 

You give up and wash your hair, absent of the task. A slight annoyance slips over you because you can’t even enjoy the ritual with your mind so preoccupied. You take a deep breath and let your eyes slip closed as the warm water rinses the soap away. 

He’s waiting for you in the black, but this time you’re on the patio with him, watching him smoke his cigarette down to the filter. It’s only for a moment, but in that moment you can smell the smoke. Feel the leather of his jacket. Taste his skin. 

You remember the intensity in his eyes as you sucked his thumb into your mouth and you try to recall every little thing about how he looked at that moment. You groan at yourself, realizing just how stupid you are for ever letting yourself feel like this. 

When you step out of the shower, you promise yourself that you won’t think about it anymore, but you still do. You try to bargain with yourself. 

You won’t think about it again after tonight, you think, but you know it’s a lie.

You blow dry your hair in the mirror and stare at the spot on your neck that Mitch had left you with. It’s faded to the point that it’s nearly undetectable, but you can see it. You want to hate Mitch for it, but somewhere in the back of your mind, you’re acutely aware that if he hadn’t done that, you would have never had the time you did with Jake. The party would have just been normal and you would still have Mitch’s number saved in your phone. Jake was right, who knows how long you would have kept dating him, despite the lack of interest on your part. 

You lay down in bed with your warm pajamas on, your feet dangling off the side and your cell in your hands. Jake’s contact information is pulled up and you flip to the Messages tab. You’ve only ever messaged him a couple of times; once when he asked you about a song you had been playing that he wanted to know the name of, and once when Josh and him were coming to pick you and Lucy up and he was messaging that they were waiting outside. 

You lay the phone face down on your chest and stare up at your ceiling. Your heart is fluttering as you think about what would happen if you called him. Right now. 

It’s just a reckless idea - you’d never do it - but that doesn’t stop your eyes from flicking to the clock on your nightstand. 

It’s 11 pm. Would he even answer? What would you say if he did?

You roll your eyes at yourself, suddenly embarrassed at how stupid you’re being. The covers are chilly as you slip into them, but thankfully, they warm up quickly. You fall into a pleasant sleep, and even though you had sworn you wouldn’t dream about it, you still do. 

+++

You wake up to your phone notifying you of a message, but you ignore it for a few minutes, trying to force yourself back to sleep. It’s five minutes later that you realize it’s not happening, so you reach a hand over for your phone. 

Lucy   10:23 am

What are you up to tonight?

A smile finds your lips. She’s always had an uncanny way of knowing when you needed her, and some girl time was exactly what the doctor ordered, you think.

Absolutely nothing. Wanna hang? you reply. You crawl out of bed and allow yourself some time to stretch your muscles before you head for the bathroom. You’re brushing your teeth when you hear a new message come in. 

Lucy   10:41 am 

For sure

Movie at Josh’s. Pick you up around 5.  

Your heart jumps.

“Fuck,” you rasp, but your mouth is still full of toothpaste, and now your mirror is dotted with white speckles. You finish brushing frantically before texting back.

Maybe just a girl night?

Because your life is currently such a mess, you’re not at all surprised that Lucy takes nearly half an hour to respond.

You lunge for the phone the second you hear the notification sound, nearly dropping the Poptart that you’ve just finished toasting. 

 Lucy  11:10 am

Don’t be silly, I already got the movie 

You have no idea how that prevents you from just watching it alone with her, but you don’t want to make her suspicious, so you don’t press any further. 

The rest of your day is spent acting like a middle schooler. You are not ready to see Jake Kiszka again. What if he says something to you in front of Lucy? Explaining it to her would be a nightmare. What if he was just drunk and doesn’t actually have any interest at all?

You’re not positive you’ll see him, so you try to convince yourself that you probably won’t. It decidedly does not work.  

You pointedly try not to think about what you’re going to wear, but despite yourself, you already have an outfit picked out by the time 4 pm rolls around. You try to reason with yourself as you eye your makeup bag.

“It’s a movie,” you remind yourself into the mirror. “We are just watching a movie in the dark and you are not putting on makeup.”

You try to be firm, but you’re weak and you end up glaring at your reflection as you apply mascara. 

Lucy is late when she arrives to get you, but it doesn’t matter, because you still feel like you haven’t had enough time to worry about everything thoroughly. Feeling unprepared, you climb into her car. 

You try to calm yourself by listening to everything Lucy is going on about as she tells you about her week. You know that she can tell that you’re nervous because she starts talking about her cat - a subject that always makes you feel better.

She’s so used to being at the Kiszka house that when you get there, she doesn’t bother knocking. She just lets herself in and hangs her coat and scarf on a hook by the door.

“Babe,” she calls out into the house, and Josh emerges from the kitchen and sweeps her into an embrace. You try not to listen to their loved up talk, you don’t feel like you have the stomach for it with the state you’re in.   

Josh greets you with a polite hug. You smile back genuinely until you realize that you have no idea if Jake told him anything, and suddenly you have a whole new nightmare to explore in your head. You try to talk yourself through it as you follow them through the hall to the living room.

He didn’t give you the shit-eating grin that you would expect to receive if he did know something. You’re also pretty sure that he would tell Lucy, and Lucy would absolutely ask you about it. You breathe a relieved sigh as you settle in on the couch.

Sam is sitting the wrong way in a reclining chair, his long legs hanging off one of the arms. He looks so gangly that you can’t help but laugh at him and he gives you a cheesy smile back. 

Since the recliner is taken, you get cozy with Lucy sandwiched between you and Josh, and a fuzzy blanket across all your laps. You want to ask if Jake is going to be joining you guys, but you chicken out. What if Josh does know about what happened at the party, and by some miracle, he just didn’t tell Lucy? You don’t want to seem like you’re thinking about Jake - even though you absolutely are - so you just stay silent. 

You try to get into the movie. You and Lucy both love anything in the horror genre, but you’d already seen this one in theaters with her, and you try not to be annoyed that she’d pick a movie you’ve both already seen, presumably just so Josh could see it as well.

It’s considerably less scary the second time around, so about halfway through, you find yourself bored. You excuse yourself to use the restroom, mostly just so you can stretch your legs, as the couch isn’t that big and fitting three people on it is a squeeze. Lucy asks if you want them to pause the movie, but you wave her off, telling her you’ll be right back.

You head up the stairs and down the hallway, and you’re just about to turn the corner to the bathroom when the breath gets knocked out of you with a thump. It doesn’t hurt, but a shocked noise escapes your lips before you can stop it. A pair of hands find your hips instantly to help steady you. It takes you a second to realize that you’ve just slammed into Jake - face first - but as soon as you do, you hold your breath. You must have a horrified look on your face because he breathes a laugh.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” you squeak. “What are you doing here?”

Deliberately slow - like he’s trying to make sure you’ve got your balance back - he pulls his hands away. Through a disbelieving grin, he says, “Well, I live here. It’s more like ‘what are you doing here?’.”

You can feel your face turning pink. “Right. Lucy and I are here for a movie,” you explain. You haven’t made an effort to step back away from him, and you can’t bring yourself to yet. His hair is wet and slicked back, and you’re annoyed it looks so good on him - you always look like a drowned cat when you get out of the shower. 

He hums in understanding but doesn’t say anything else. He just raises his eyebrows at you expectantly. 

Just above a whisper, you chance, “Are we going to talk about it?”

He feigns consideration. 

“We could,” he says with a nod, his lips stretching out into a mischievous smirk. “Or we could pick up where we left off.”

You subtly pull the sleeves on your sweater down to your wrists in an effort to hide the goosebumps that are rising on your skin. You open your mouth, but you’re truly at a loss for words. You had a full week to think about this, but you realize you never got around to allowing yourself to figure out what you’d say to him. He gives you an ample amount of time to think of a response, but the only thing you can do is stare at his lips.

“What’s the matter?” he asks, his voice is like silk. It’s quiet, but commanding. A tone you’d use if you had someone's wrists cuffed to your headboard. “Where did all that confidence go?”

He didn’t have as much control the last time you were this close to him, but he definitely does now, and you can tell that this is exactly how he’s comfortable.

“Pretty sure my liver cleared it all out Saturday morning,” you reply, swallowing hard. The words had come out softer than you’d intended. He’s smug as he seems to give you a once over, and your chest tightens under his gaze. 

“That’s a shame.” 

You can smell his shampoo as he brushes past you - something minty and pleasant. The sharpness of it helps ground you a little, but as soon as he disappears down the stairs, you slip into the bathroom and slump against the closed door. The whole exchange only lasted a couple of minutes, but you’re left feeling exhausted. You consider staying in the bathroom forever - maybe setting up a nice nest of towels so you never have to see anyone for the rest of your life, but then you remember that you have your favorite kind of yogurt in your fridge at home, so you’ll have to come out eventually. Instead, you just stand in front of the sink and splash cold water against your face as you try to collect your thoughts. 

You don’t see him the rest of the evening, and for that, you’re simultaneously grateful and annoyed. Multiple times you think about marching back up to his room, but that's as far as you get. You still have no idea what you’d say or do once you got up there. 

Lucy takes you home after the movie, and she offers to stay the night, but you tell her you’re wiped and that you’re headed right to bed. You go to get out of her car, but she places her hand on yours where it’s rested on the center console. 

“Hey, so Josh and I were talking,” she starts, and your stomach tightens. You’re suddenly positive that she’s about to tell you that she knows everything, so you hold your breath. 

“About birthday plans. So he was thinking that since I’m going to be leaving in a week, he’s going to throw me a party at his house next Saturday,” she finishes excitedly. You smile at her, trying not to look scared. 

Lucy’s birthday is in early November, and every single year since you met, you’ve spent it together. This year, however, her parents surprised her with a trip abroad. You had been planning on having a nice dinner together just before she left, but you suppose that it is more efficient to just have a party with everyone.

 “That’s great,” you agree, squeezing her hand. 

“I’m so excited, I’m just hoping you can help us plan it all?” She gives you her best puppy eyes. “Since I’m going to be so busy packing and making sure I have everything together.”

You take a deep breath and nod in agreement. “Of course. You can count on me, Lu.”

She beams at you and leans in to give you a cramped car hug.

When you’re back in your room, you shoot Josh a message asking what he’d like you to be in charge of. Your body feels tight, so you head to the bathroom and draw yourself a bath, setting the water as hot as it will go. 

Josh K    9:38 pm

thinking probably cake 

You frown at your phone and shoot back,  just cake?

Josh K    9:41 pm

yah 

You set your phone down on the tile by the bathtub and roll your eyes. “Idiot,” you say out loud through a smile. You undress and sink into the water slowly, and it’s so hot that it turns your skin pink, but the slight pain is grounding. A message notification sounds from beside you, so you extend a wet hand to grab it.

Josh K    9:48 pm 

Lucy wants to do decorations herself n sam threatened suicide if he cant dj

You huff a laugh. What are you getting her for a present?, you send back.

Josh K    9:51 pm

secret :)

Josh K    9:52 pm

maybe just birthday sex 

You leave it at that, grateful that Lucy has someone so loving in her life. You think she deserves it, even if it does gross you out now and again. 

You spend the rest of your time in the bath willing yourself to relax and trying to figure out why the last three words Jake said to you upset you more than the entirety of your last interaction with Mitch.

PART THREE

Taglist: @myownparadise96   (message me to add yourself if you want!)

[bakusoftie]

How about Deku, Katsuki and Todoroki being turned into a cat ( or whatever pet you want ) for a week and their fem s/o taking care of them (like petting,feeding,and playing with them) until they turn back ?

this is so cute omfg

y’all

i fucking love cats

Izuwu, Bakubabe, and Icycutie turning into cats for a week

🥦 izuwu 🥦

apparently some general studies student hated class 1-A so bad that they used their quirk to turn the innocent lil deku into a tiny white munchkin cat with his emerald green eyes and three black spots of fur on his cheeks

he looked so ADORABLE AHHHH

you were walking towards the dorms when you hear the cries of a kitten and looked down at your feet to find the cutest cat you have ever laid eyes on

“Hey there lil buddy!,” you cooed as you picked the ball of fluff up and rested him on your chest.

you thought he reminded you of your crush from the color of his wide green eyes

you couldn’t stop yourself from pecking kisses all over his fluffy face

izuku was sent into a flurry of purrs as he nuzzled his head into your warm chest

he felt kind of bad since you had no idea it was him but he felt so safe and complete being snuggled in your arms and he never wanted to leave

you snook the cute ass fur ball in your room, not before raiding the kitchen for a bowl of milk and leftover pork cutlet bowl that belonged to Denki (it’s okay you left him some money for McNuggets)

you laid the stubborn kitten on your bed but he kept wanting to bury his head in your warmth

“Awww, I’m gonna name you...Deku!,”

the kitten raised his head when he heard that and started licking your hand as if he was giving you little kitty kisses

“You must like that name,huh? It’s because you remind me of him...because you both are so cute!!”

Izuku crawls into your lap and nuzzles his head against your thighs and thinks ‘damn this is the life’

he would never get to do this when he returns to his human form so he for sure will milk the fuck out of this

when your hand comes down to scratch his neck, he swears he has reached heaven as his purring increases and he lets out a little “prrt”

He’s fucking love it

Until he sees you getting undressed...

Then he bulldozes his face into your pillow and let’s out a series of ‘meows’ that kinda sound like his muttering

If you stroke his fur while he eats, he feels like he’s going to combust from joy please don’t stop

6 days later when you’re so used to having this little kitten follow you everywhere and giving you cuddles, you also start to wonder why izuku hasn’t been coming to class lately

until one night when you and Izukitty are cuddling, him being curled into a ball on your boobies

And you feel the fuzzy warmth on your chest start to get heavier

uh

two questions

where did your cat go?

WHY IS IZUKU NAKED AND STRADDLING YOUR WAIST

Izuwu is so flustered and he can’t hardly get a word out except...

“M-Meow?”

💥kitsuki bakukitty💥

ma there's a weird-looking fucking cat outside

seriously...bakugou as a cat is fucking frightening

do not give this fucker CLAWS

well somebody did

and bakugou was fucking pissed

he couldn’t do anything for himself and his quirk wouldn’t even fucking work

not to mention he keeps hacking up disgusting fucking hairballs

it was your turn to take the dorm’s trash out when you see a

sort of cute-looking?

ash-blonde cat with sharp red eyes staring into your soul.

THIS FUCKER POUNCED ON YOUR LEG

CLAWS DIGGING INTO YOUR FLESH

he is literally ‘my cat from hell’

But you thought his aggressive actions just meant he was an abused stray that needed to be nutured

uh bitch

you was w r o n g

you also thought his fur and eyes kinda looked like your crush, Katsuki

so of course,

you named the kitty

katsukitty

he did not wike it

you got so many cat scratches BITCH YOU STARTING TO LOOK LIKE VICTOR ZSASZ

you googled “how to tame an agressive cat” on wikihow and it said to spend time with the cat and play with him so

you took that bitch to your room

and got out a ball of yarn and a laser pointer

“let the chaos begin, katsukitty 😈”

let me just tell you that this bitch’s meows sound like he’s being fucking drowned like

he’s so ugly LMAOASKKS

but the angry little kitten gets used to you and rubs his head your hand as he gets ready to ATTack and nibble the fuck out of your finger

you text kiri to come over and meet your new little friend and

the moment he smells the stench of another male coming up into his territory (aka you)

he fucking asshole

bites a fucking chunk out of kiri’s lightening mcqueen crocs

kiri: gEt yOur fUckinG cAt, BiTch

you: he don’t bite 🙂

kiri: yES hE dO

im so sorry kiri but

those crocs were ugly anyway

katsukitty did you a favor

bakugou is such an asshole cat like he literally jumped up on your dresser for the sole purpose of knocking your limited edition Best Jeanist Funko POP to the floor

yOu shiTTy BitcH

you had to get a spray bottle full of water after he scratched up the All Might t-shirt that Izuku bought you for your birthday

jealous heaDASS

he won’t let anyone inside your room

I mean you saw what he did to kiri’s crocs

So when mineta thought he would be slick and sniff your panties while you were in the shower

Katsukitty didn’t even have to touch the fucker

he just growled and mineta shit his pants

he protecc

he attacc

but most importantly

he a snacc

speaking of snacks,,,

if you try to feed him that gross ass canned cat food

he will fuck your ass up

don’t even think about it

although...he was considering it 😳

but no

once you accidentally dropped some sriracha on the floor and his ass lapped that shit up

you swore to god that isn’t healthy for cats to eat but

you still gave him a whole bowl full

because he made him happy

and you could finally pet him while he ate without getting slice and diced

that’s how most your days were like until the end of the week when you were coming to your room after making Katsukitty a tiny version of Bakugou’s costume

but what you were met with was a naked Bakugou (with only a ball of yard to cover his privates) on your bed

“I’m going to get you back for calling me fucking ‘Katsukitty’ for a week,dumbass”

💙 IcyCutie ❤️

oh this defenseless baby

he has no clue how this happened to him but the moment he sees you, he has the urge to rub his head against your leg?

and he does

you look down when you feel something soft and furry brushing against your ankle

it’s this cute ass slender white cat with an orange spot that covers his left eye and head. His eyes are two different colors and you think he is the cutest thing to ever grace this earth

He’s literally many the ‘🥺’ face and

Your uwus have been

s n a t c h e d

Todorokitty wishes he could communicate with you somehow and tell you that it’s him but then you’re putting him up and holding him tightly against your breasts and

😳 big boobs? small boobs? no boobs? he do not care

his brain just goes: tiddy

honestly you could do whatever you want with him and he wouldn’t care

he’s kinda one of those cats that just want to sleep

he’s such an lazy cat like

just hold him and lay with him please

even as a cat, he is just so touchstarved

the only moment he shows any feral activity is when you brought some Zaria soba for yourself and nasty ass fish for him

this bitch yeeted the fish off the plate and when you’ve gone to go clean it up

THIS BITCH PUTS HIS FURRY ASS HEAD INSIDE THE BOWL

bitch almost drowned in that shit

feed him

peasant

he definitely gets used to you taking care of him and being treated like he’s special and loved because he never got that before so there’s times where he just stares at your with wide eyes and paws at your tummy

he gets the best sleep of his life being cushioned by your body

you are his bed now

sometimes he’ll leave the room and come back to leave you “gifts”

oh

oh god

is that a fucking hamster?

😳 oh no

that’s koda’s hamster

“I understand that you were trying to do a good thing but you have committed an atrocity”

just wait until you get this hoe on some catnip 😈

normally he’s such a calm and collected kitty but once you sprinkle some of that good kush

he go ‘aRrrrOowwww’

he’s basically banging his head on the carpet trying to snort this shit the best he can

you and todorokitty have some good times and some bad times

but you do miss actually Todoroki

it makes you sad some nights because you thought he might be avoiding you

when he sees you sad, it reminds him of his mom tbh and he never wants you to feel this way,,especially if he’s literally right in front you

he’ll lay his head on your shoulder and put tiny kitten licks all over your face

👅 aaaulghh

the next day, you walked into your room after a trying day of school and flopped onto your bed where you thought your precious kitten was so you went to pet the little guy

except you were met with flesh

and i oop

😟

“are you naked? ewwwww.”

Shouto had no fucking shame

He just pulled you into his arms like nothing changed

“Shut up and let me love you, kitten”

[baddadjokez]

514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.​I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.​Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.​Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!​I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.​What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.​How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.​I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.​Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.​I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.​My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.​Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.​How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.​What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.​Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.​There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.​What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.​What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.​Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.​Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What should you do if you are cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? Their SuBAHHru.​What do you call a french pig? Porque.​What do you call a line of rabbits marching backwards? A receding hairline.​Why don’t vampires go to barbecues? They don’t like steak.​How do trees access the internet? They log on.​Why should you never trust a train? They have loco motives.​Is your refrigerator running? Better go catch it.​The future,the present and the past walked into a bar.Things got a little tense.​I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.​I just found out I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.​I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.​Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.​I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.​Read enough of our funny puns, and you'll be punstoppable.​Yesterday a clown held the door for me. It was a nice jester.​I used to go fishing with Skrillex but he kept dropping the bass.​The wedding was so emotional even the cake was in tiers.​What does a house wear? A dress.​Why can't bicycles stand up on their own? Since they are 2 tired.​I owe a lot to the sidewalks. They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years.​Imagine if alarm clocks hit you back in the morning.It would be truly alarming.​Why is a skeleton a bad liar? You can see right through it.​What do you receive when you ask a lemon for help? Lemonaid.​A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.​What does a dog say when he sits down on a piece of sandpaper? Ruff!​What do you call crystal clear urine? 1080pee.​At my boxing club there is only one punch bag. I hate waiting for the punch line!​An untalented gymast walks into a bar.​Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.​I was accused of being a plagiarist, their word not mine.​My friends say they don’t like skeleton puns. I should put more backbone into them.​Let me FILL you in on my trip to the dentist.​Why does the singer of Cheap Thrills not want us to Sia?​Traveling on a flying carpet is a rugged experience.​Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.​The old woman who lived in a shoe wasn’t the sole owner,there were strings attached.​Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.​My new diet consists of aircraft, its a bit plane.​Have you ever tried to milk a cow which has been cut in half? Udder madness.​Why are there fences on graveyards? Because people are dying to get in.​Why do trees have so many friends? They branch out.​Models of dragons are not to scale.​Never discuss infinity with a mathematician, they can go on about it forever.​Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.​Don’t trust people that do acupuncture, they’re back stabbers.​A persistent banker wouldn’t stop hitting on me so I asked him to leave me a loan.​I ordered a book of puns last week, but i didn't get it.​People say i look better without glasses but i just can't see it.​Don’t judge a meal by the look of the first course. It’s very souperficial.​I heard Donald Trump is going to ban shredded cheese, and make America grate again.​I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.​What do you call a young musician? A minor.​Police were called to a daycare yesterday, where a 2-year-old was resisting a rest.​If artists wear sketchers do linguists wear converse?​I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.​Jill broke her finger today, but on the other hand she was completely fine.​I smeared some ketchup all over my eyes once. It was a bad idea in Heinz- sight.​I flipped a coin over an issue the other day, it was quite the toss-up.​I got hit in the head with a can of soda? Luckily it was a soft drink.​I heard that the post office was a male dominated industry.​Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport? Because the best you can ever get is bronze.​What do you mean June is over? Julying.​Why is Kylo Ren so angry? Beause he’s always Ben Solo.​These reversing cameras are great. Since I got one I haven’t looked back.​The candle quit his job because he felt burned out.​Our maintenance guy lost his legs on the job, now he’s just a handyman.​Going to bed with music on gave him sound sleep.​A magic tractor drove down the road and turned into a field!​I met some aliens from outer space. They were pretty down to earth.​The plane flight brought my acrophobia to new heights.​My phone has to wear glasses ever since it lost its contacts.​I, for one, like Roman numerals.​How do mountains see? They peak.​The show was called Spongebob Squarepants but everyone knows the star was Patrick.​This is not alcohol, water you thinking?!​Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can’t hit the high seas.​I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.​The earth's rotation really makes my day.​If I buy a bigger bed will I have more or less bedroom?​Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.​Two ropes were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-frayed.​What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.​I got a master’s degree in being ignored; no one seems to care.​After eating the ship, the sea monster said, I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.​Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.​A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.​I had a pun about insanity but then I lost it.​He couldn’t work out how to fix the washing machine so he threw in the towel.​Why does the man want to buy nine rackets? Cause tennis too many.​Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.​If I got paid in lots of Pennes I would make loads of pasta.​I thought I saw a spider on my laptop, but my friend said it was just a bug.​A doctor broke his leg while auditioning for a play.Luckily he still made the cast.​The tale of the haunted refrigerator was chilling.​Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.​If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?​I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around.​Simba, you're falling behind. I must ask you to Mufasa.​I bought a wooden whistle but it wooden whistle.​The bomb didn't want to go off. So it refused.​The sore mummy needed a Cairo-practor​I feel sorry for shopping carts. They’re always getting pushed around.​The display of still-life art was not at all moving!​On Halloween October is nearly Octover.​Pig puns are so boaring.​Why couldn’t the dead car drive into the cluttered garage? Lack of vroom.​What do you call Samsung's security guards? Guardians of the Galaxy.​What does Superman have in his drink? Just ice.​How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.​Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.​The safe was invented by a cop and a robber. It was quite a combination.​What do you do when balloons are hurt? You helium.​One hat says to the other, "You stay here, I’ll go on a head."​How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.​When does a farmer dance? When he drops the beet.​When the scientist wanted to clone a deer, he bought a doe it yourself kit.​If people ask how many puns I made in Germany I reply, "nein"​Did you hear about the invention of the white board? It was remarkable.​If Donald Trump becomes president, America is going toupee.​Can February March? No, but April May.​I hate Russian Dolls, they are so full of themselves.​What do you do to an open wardrobe? You closet.​The magazine about ceiling fans went out of business due to low circulation.​So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!​Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos.​A backwards poem writes inverse.​Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.​I asked my friend, Nick, if he had 5 cents I could borrow. But he was Nicholas.​The soundtrack for Blackfish was orcastrated.​Where do you imprison a skeleton? In a rib cage.​There’s a fine line between the numerator and the denominator.​I used to work at a hairdresser but i just wasn’t cut out for it.​Why is metal and a microwave a match made in heaven? When they met, sparks flew.​The lumberjack loved his new computer. He especially enjoyed logging in.​Garbage collectors are rubbish drivers!​When the church relocated it had an organ transplant.​Lettuce take a moment to appreciate this salad pun.​The scarecrow get promoted because he was outstanding in his field.​Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.​I never understood odorless chemicals, they never make scents.​What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.​Why was dumbo sad? He felt irrelephant.​When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.​Old skiers never die. They just go down hill.​Did you hear about the pun that was actually funny? Neither have we.​You know why I like egg puns? They crack me up!​Want to hear a pun about ghosts? That's the spirit!​I used to make clown shoes… which was no small feat.​Did you hear about the human cannonball? Too bad he got fired!​What happened when the magician got mad? She pulled her hare out!​Did you hear about the circus that caught on fire? It was in tents.​The one day of the week that eggs are definitely afraid of is Fry-day.​A hen will always leave her house through the proper eggs-it.​The man who ate too many eggs was considered to be an egg-oholic.​All the hens consider the chef to be very mean because he beats the eggs.​Eskimos keep all of their chilled eggs inside of the egg-loo.​Under the doctor’s advice, the hen is laying off eggs for a few weeks.​I had a real problem making a hard-boiled egg this morning until I cracked it.​The best time of day to eat eggs is at the crack of dawn.​The chicken coop only had 2 doors since if it had 4 doors it would be a sedan.​Crossing a cement mixer and a chicken will result in you getting a brick layer.​That reckless little egg always seems to egg-celerate when he sees the light turn yellow.​Hopefully this egg pun doesn't make your brain too fried or scrambled.​Don't ever have multiple people wash dishes together. It's hard for them to stay in sink.​People using umbrellas always seem to be under the weather.​I dissected an iris today. It was an eye-opening experience.​What was Forrest Gump’s email password? 1forrest1.​What planet is like a circus? Saturn, it has three rings!​Before my father died he worked in a circus as a stilt walker. I used to look up to him.​Why did the lion eat the tightrope walker? He wanted a well-balanced meal!​I really look up to my tall friends.​I hate negative numbers and will stop at nothing to avoid them.​Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.​It takes guts to make a sausage.​Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll “Let It Go”!​What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!​How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it​What do you get when a witch goes to the beach? A sand-witch!​Where do cows go on Friday nights? To the mooooo-vies!​What did the mommy tomato say to the baby tomato? C’mon, ketchup!​Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!​What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?​Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with!​What is a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrrrr!​What does a piece of toast wear to bed? His pa-JAM-as!​What does one eye say to the other eye? Something between us smells​Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!​What happens when an egg laughs? It cracks up!​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!​Why didn’t the teddy bear want dessert? Because he was stuffed!​Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating? Because the ice might crack up!​What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!​What’s mommy and daddy’s favorite ride at the carnival? A married-go-round!​How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies? Pretty crummy!​What do you call a skunk who flies in a helicopter? A smelly-copter!​What do you get when you shake a cow? A milkshake!​How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!​Why did the bee get married? Because she found her honey!​What did the ocean say to their airplane? Nothing, it just waved!​Where do eskimo pigs live? In pig-loos.​What’s a dinosaur called when it’s sleeping? A dino-snore!​What did the cookie say to the annoying cookie? Crumb on!​Why did Mickey Mouse go up in space? To find Pluto!​What does Olaf eat for lunch? Icebergers!​What letter is always wet? The C!​How do you throw a space party? You planet.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​Nope. Unintended.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​The broom swept the nation away.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says “Do you smell fish?”​Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in france? There was nothing but des brie.​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What did the buffalo say to his son? Bison.​What should you do if you’re cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​How did Darth Vader know what luke was getting him for his birthday? He could sense his presence.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s the difference between a bench, a fish, and a bucket of glue? You can’t tune a bench but you can tuna fish. I bet you got stuck on the bucket of glue part.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​Why did the man dig a hole in his neighbor’s backyard and fill it with water? Because he meant well.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini, but if that breaks down they drive their SuBAHHru.

[927roses-and-stuff]

Miracles in Gotham: Chapter One: Strings of Fate

Hey, guys! This fic is inspired by @ozmav’s Maribat AU. Shoutout to @mystery-5-5 for brainstorming ideas with me for this fic. Hopefully, you guys enjoy it!

It’s only been a few hours since I posted the prologue, and I’ve already received such wonderful feedback! Thank you to anyone who took the time to read and/or like/reblog/comment/gave kudos to this! 

I know it seems very Mlbverse-centric right now, but I have to set up some of the conflicts somehow, amirite? Trust me, you’ll only have to deal with Paris for like one more chapter.

If you want to see more, follow: #miraclesingotham

P.S. I refuse to believe that the ladybug-themed egg is the actual form of the Miracle Box. Nope, no way. 

Tag list (if anyone wants that to be a thing):

@northernbluetongue

First Next Fanfic

Chapter One: Strings of Fate

Dear Diary,

Everything’s been so different without Master Fu. I’ve heard from Marianne that he’s healthy and doing well. I’m happy that he gets to be free from the Miraculous and living happily with the love of his life, but would it be selfish to wish that he were still around to guide me? It’s been a total disaster since I’ve become the new Guardian. Chloé’s anger at Ladybug makes it impossible to go a day without an akuma; much less since Lila Rossi decides to provoke her at every turn. 

Honestly, what is wrong with that girl? She’s even more irritating than Chloé, if you ever thought that was possible. 

But, diary, I’ve noticed that Hawkmoth’s become more strategic with his akumas. I think handing out the other Miraculous was a mistake. I’m sure it’s because Hawkmoth now knows the identity of the others that he’s been targeting our class almost exclusively. 

This is why I’ve always said that secret identities were important. Now that they’ve all been discovered, I doubt I can entrust them without harming them and their loved ones. 

I wish I could write more and reflect on my emotions like Master Fu told me to, but I hear an akuma calling my name. 

Bisoux, 

Marinette

________________________________________________________________

“So, chaton, who are we fighting this time?” Ladybug asked as she landed outside of the Louvre.

“So glad to be here in your presence. Ladybug, here comes the lovely Princess Fragrance!” He quipped as he dodged a zombified civilian rushing at him. 

“Rhyming, Chat Noir?” Ladybug laughed as she jumped up, making two of the zombies crash into one another. “Are you sure you haven’t been caught in Princess Fragrance’s traps?”

Chat laughed and leapt to her side, using his baton to bat away at the incoming civilians. “Maybe just a whiff.”

She scanned around quickly, looking for green skin, pink hair, or her gothic black dress. When she found nothing, she grabbed Chat Noir by the waist, and projected her yoyo on one of the Louvre’s chimneys. 

“Well, wake up and smell the roses, chaton. We better go find her Royal Highness!” Ladybug said as she grabbed onto Chat’s waist and swung away from the incoming hoard of civilians. She watched as they toppled over each other, desperately grabbing at the sky. 

Chat winced at the sight also. “Me-ouch! Seems like their loyalty’s deadly.”

They landed on the roof and Ladybug straightened, letting go of Chat. She sighed. 

“Let’s go before it turns into a bloodbath.” 

Chat nodded. “Princess Fragrance was headed to the Pont des Arts  last I saw her.”

“Do you know why she got akumatized this time?”

“Not really. Maybe it had something to do with the Prince again.”

Ladybug sighed. Poor Rose and her fragile heart. “I guess. Well, hopefully she doesn’t break anymore hearts.”

When they arrived, Princess Fragrance was seated upon the shoulders of Luka and Anarka Couffaine. Behind her was an army of their classmates, standing in silence and waiting for their orders. At her feet was Juleka, looking up at her and pleading. They managed to catch the end of Princess Fragrance’s declaration before Chat tackled Juleka and rolled away just as perfume was sprayed. 

Princess Fragrance screeched. “You will not get away from me, my Princess! Minions, after the mangy cat!” 

Ladybug’s eyes widened as she watched her classmates charge towards Chat and Juleka in unison. Jumping into the fray, Ladybug twirled her yoyo into a shield and yelled at Chat behind her. 

“Hurry up and get Juleka away from here, while I distract them!” 

“But, Ladybug-”

“Just go!”

Chat looked from Ladybug, who was slowly being overrun by Princess Fragrance’s minions, to Juleka in his arms. Making a decision, he carefully set her down and whispered at her to run when she was ready, before joining in the battlefield. He jumped in front of Ladybug and swung his baton, knocking out half of them. 

“Sorry, Ladybug. I’m not going to leave you alone.” 

Ladybug huffed, but didn’t have time to check on Juleka as the minions recovered and charged towards them even more aggressively. Ladybug swung her yoyo, making sure it wrapped around one of the farther lamp posts before swinging across the crowd, making sure to kick some of them down. When she landed, she searched for Princess Fragrance. 

Where could she have gone? She was here a second ago. 

She quickly scanned the area before she spotted her, racing down the bridge followed by Luka and Anarka. They were now behind the crowd that Chat Noir was still struggling against and Juleka was slowing down by the looks of it. If Ladybug didn’t hurry soon, she’d be captured next. 

Hurriedly, Ladybug swung over the crowd again, making sure to grab Chat Noir on the way. 

“Thank you, bugaboo. Now, I think it’s time to pull the ace up our sleeve, right?” 

Ladybug nodded. “Lucky Charm!”

A spool of red yarn dropped in her hands. 

“What the heck am I supposed to do with this?” Ladybug asked as she scrutinized the object. Sighing, she ran towards Juleka and Princess Fragrance, hoping to at least prevent further damage. She was hurrying so much, that she barely heard Chat shout something about fate and strings. 

With a thud, she managed to push Luka and Anarka away, before landing on her feet. Not even a second passed before Princess Fragrance kicked her in the chest and she rolled away. Luckily, Chat caught her before she fell headfirst, but she could already feel the bruises forming.

She could only watch as Princess Fragrance approached Juleka who shook in place. 

“Don’t worry, my love,” Rose said. “Nothing can tear us apart now. We will be together forever.”

Ladybug watched in horror as Princess Fragrance reached up to caress Juleka’s cheek. Her earring beeped. She had to hurry.

What was it that Chat had said? Strings and fate? 

She glanced down at the spool of yarn in her hand. 

Oh.

The red string of fate. 

Ladybug stood up and rushed in between the two girls, tying one end of the string on each of their fingers. Princess Fragrance and Juleka jerked back in surprise. 

“What is the meaning of this?”

Ladybug glanced to Juleka nervously and winked, hoping she would play along. “You’re right, Princess Fragrance! With this red string of fate, you and Juleka can now be together forever! It is said that the red string ties soulmates together in an unbreakable bond.”

Princess Fragrance squealed. “I knew it, I knew it!” 

Ladybug watched as Chat snuck behind Princess Fragrance and snatched at the perfume bottle in her belt. However, the bottle accidentally sprayed and Chat started to sing praises to Princess Fragrance.

Princess Fragrance turned around, then turned back to Ladybug scandalized. “Wait! This was a trick! You don’t think my princess and I are meant to be at all! You just wanted to take her away from me! You-!”

Before she said anything else, Ladybug had already untied Juleka from the other end and dragged Princess Fragrance closer to her. Before she could attempt anything, Ladybug spun her around and around until the yarn had effectively tied her up. 

Juleka rushed over to Princess Fragrance and grabbed the perfume bottle, giving it to Ladybug. She quickly purified it and untied Rose before enacting the Miraculous Cure. 

She knelt down beside Juleka, making sure that Rose wasn’t too disoriented from the attack. True to the Cure, everyone else was waking up from their slumber, and any of the injured were instantly healed.

However, Marinette knew that each one of them remembered; something even the Miraculous Cure couldn’t fully erase. All of them remembered; except for the victim. 

“Hey,” she said softly, brushing aside Rose’s bangs to reveal her teary eyes. “What happened? This was the third time this week.”

When Rose couldn’t do anything but sniffle and curl into Juleka’s embrace, Juleka replied, “It’s been a rough week for her. Chloe’s anger makes her more nervous than she lets on. We bumped into Lila who complimented us today and Chloe happened to be nearby and  told Rose that no one would really love her.”

Ladybug frowned. Already, she knew that no other result could’ve come from having Chloe and Lila in the same vicinity. 

She watched Juleka rub Rose’s back softly and murmur sweet words of comfort. Ladybug awkwardly patted Rose’s back twice before she stood up. Her earring beeped again, and she stood up. 

“Look, I’ve noticed that your classmates have been targeted more recently. I’ll try to see what’s going on, but my advice is to stick together. Even if people you don’t like taunt you, make sure you support each other.” 

Juleka nodded. “Thank you. We know you can help us.” 

Ladybug forced herself to smile. “Of course.”

With that, she swung away and hid in a random alley. Before she de-transformed, she sent Chat a quick message to meet up later at the Eiffel Tower. 

________________________________________________________________

When she finally returned to her room, she was greeted by a multitude of kwamis: Pollen. Trixx, Sass, Longg, and Wayzz. Each of the kwamis sat upon their customized jewelry boxes that doubled as a bed and a miraculous container. 

“Welcome home, Marinette!”

Marinette smile at them, setting down a bowl of food she had taken from the kitchen. “Hey guys. I bet you’re hungry, feel free to dig in!”

She watched as the kwamis fervently dived into the bowl, eating as much as their tiny stomachs could feel. Glancing to her closet, she could envision the other kwamis entrapped in the Miracle Box, isolated from their world. 

Marinette wasn’t too sure why, but when Master Fu gave up his guardianhip, the Miracle Box had transformed into a red and black polka-dotted egg. She hadn’t thought too much of it then, but she  later realized that the box was locked. As far as she or the kwamis knew, it was inaccessible. Marinette watched as the kwamis floated over their jewelry boxes. She sighed, feeling unprepared for the future of being a Guardian ahead of her; she still couldn’t believe that Master Fu was gone, but the future didn’t wait, and it would string her along whether she wanted it to or not.

“Are you okay, Marinette?” Tikki asked, floating closer to her owner’s face. 

She sighed again. “I’m just thinking about the Miracle Box again. I don’t know how else we can get it to open, and the only other person who would know, no longer remembers!” 

Wayzz floated next to her and gently patted her arm.  “It will all work out, Marinette. Have you tried looking through the Miracle Journal, yet?”

Marinette sighed and buried her head in her arms. “Even if I did, I don’t think I would understand a thing.”

“What do you mean?” Wayzz asked, floating to sit on Marinette’s head. “Master Fu left a translated copy for you on his tablet. He had it with him when he went to fight Hawkmoth.”

Marinette shot up and cupped Wayzz in her hands. “Wayzz, there was no tablet when we rescued Master Fu. There was no tablet in the locker either.”

The kwamis’ chatter stopped and their eyes widened.

 “Then, that means…,” Wayzz trailed off. 

Marinette heard herself whisper as the daunting thought loomed upon them:

“Hawkmoth has the tablet.”

[mychemicalrachel]

Right Now

Part One

Read on ao3!

Part Two; The Talk

Time doesn’t stop for accidents.

That’s what his dad used to say. Sometimes they were words grumbled irritably, or sighed, or shouted. It didn’t make much sense to Buck at the time. It was just one of those things parents say, like “raining cats and dogs” or “it’s five o’clock somewhere.”

Time doesn’t stop for accidents.

“It means that the world doesn’t stop turning just because you made a mistake,” Maddie had patiently explained to him once. “Accidents happen, but life goes on. It means you have to just keep going.”

Time had certainly felt frozen within the confines of the hospital, but as soon as they step outside, the bright light of day hits Buck and he realizes that while he had been inside with Eddie, the world had been spinning without them.

And still now, it turns around him.

The ride of the firehouse passes in silence, but inside Buck’s head there is anything but quiet. He wonders what the hell he’s going to say to Christopher.

He needs to be honest, as honest as possible, but reassuring. Though his own thoughts and fears are screaming a thousand what ifs, Buck knows he has to push those down and remain optimistic. More than just for Chris, but for himself. He doesn’t want to imagine the dark places his mind will go if he allows it.

When Athena pulls the cruiser to a stop next to Buck’s jeep outside the station, she turns the car off but neither of them moves to get out.

“Thanks for the ride,” he says.

Athena nods. “You need me to wait?” she asks. “I can take you to Eddie’s.”

The word yes is on the tip of his tongue. There’s a part of Buck that wants to scream it. He wants to push all of this off onto someone else, make it someone else’s responsibility, someone else’s problem.

Eventually he says no, because he knows that if he accepts the ride, she’ll offer to come inside with him. She’ll offer to break the news to Chris. She’ll offer anything he needs.

And he’s afraid he just might take it.

A slim hand reaches across the small space to rest on his arm; it’s smaller than his, but it feels so much stronger.

“You call me if you need anything,” she tells him.

He nods.

“Buck,” she says, and waits until he looks up at her. Then she repeats, “Anything. I’m serious.”

He swallows down the emotions clawing at his throat again. “Thanks, Athena.”

And then he flees the car before she can offer anything else. Already, it feels like she’s given so much.

One of the trucks is out, for which Buck is thankful because it means half the crew is gone. He can see the rest upstairs in the kitchen, can hear the crack of balls knocking together on the pool table, and someone distantly laughs at an unheard joke.

He wonders if anyone told them about Eddie, but realizes that it doesn’t matter. He knows their names and faces, has worked beside them on occasion, but the people here aren’t his family, not like his own team is. Hen and Chimney are probably already back at home, recuperating from a long shift, maybe making plans to visit Eddie again in a day or two. Buck knows already that he’ll be making the trip again tonight.

The showers are empty; another small blessing Buck is ready to take for granted. He turns the water as hot as he can stand and lets it pour over him, staining his skin a furious red.

He wishes he could stop time, rewind it, save Eddie from ever putting him in this position, because as scared as he is right now, he’s also pissed. At Eddie, at himself. He feels like a bomb and when he explodes, it’ll endanger anyone standing too close.

It was unfair of Eddie to ask him to be Christopher’s godfather in the first place. As much as he loves Chris, would do anything for him, he feels helpless. During the tsunami, with the water all around them, Buck’s instincts had kicked in. They had told him to grab Christopher, to not let go, to hold him as tight as he could.

But this… this is so different. There are no instincts for this. He’s not sure he’s strong enough to hold Chris together, no matter how tight he holds.

At the time, signing the papers to become Christopher’s legal guardian in an emergency was a safety net. But now it didn’t feel like a net; it felt like a noose.

“Fuck!” Buck yells and before he can even think, his fist is flashing forward and connecting with the wall. A speck of blood shines on the tile and he looks down to see the split on his knuckle. It washes away in the spray of the shower, and with it his anger seems to disappear.

None of this is fair. Not the fact that Eddie might die, that Chris might lose his only remaining parent, that Buck has to be the one to tell him. It’s not fair that Buck might lose his best friend. He wants to scream and yet his chest feels so tight he can barely breathe.

It takes a few more minutes before Buck can bring himself to leave the shower, and a few minutes longer to put on his spare clothes. The smell of smoke still seems to linger in his nose.

The entire drive to the Diaz house, Buck tries again to think of what he might say. He grapples with all of the usual condolences, but quickly pushes them aside when they all sound fake coming from his mouth. By the time he’s stopping the Jeep next to Carla’s minivan, Buck is no closer to a plan than he was an hour ago.

Then again, Buck has always done his best work diving in blind and making it up as he goes along.

He lets himself in with the spare key Eddie had given him long ago. It’s well worn, hanging snugly next to the key for his own apartment, but this time the metal feels heavier in his hand. The sound of quiet voices leads Buck toward the kitchen and as he nears he can smell something tomatoey wafting over from the stove. He realizes he hasn’t eaten since this morning, but the smell of it just makes his stomach churn.

Christopher is leaning back in a chair at the kitchen table, a yellow pencil in his hand that he waves around to accentuate whatever point he’s currently trying to make. He’s so like Eddie in that way, always talking with his hands. Carla sits opposite him, her chin resting on her hand, listening intently.

There’s a small smile on her face that freezes when she looks up, spotting Buck. It’s a miracle he thinks that she manages to keep it at all, though it turns stiff.

Christopher notices and twists around in his seat. “Hey dad,” he says, but the words die on his lips. A smile stretches across his face and Buck’s heart breaks just a little bit more. “Buck!” he exclaims. He starts to grab his crutches, but Buck steps closer.

He runs his fingers through Christopher’s curls, dropping a kiss to the top of his head. “Hey, buddy.”

Carla catches Buck’s gaze and quickly stands. “I made some spaghetti,” she says. “Chris has already eaten, but it can be warmed up easy peasy for later on.” She makes her way around the table and Buck has a brief moment’s worry that she’s going to offer to stay, and then he’ll say yes. But she simply says, “I guess I should be heading home. Call me if you need anything.”

And just like that, Buck and Christopher are alone. Carefully, Buck sits down opposite Chris. All the time he spent trying to figure out a good way to say this and still, Buck is empty-handed. He has no idea where to start or end.

Christopher swings his legs under the table and asks, “Is Dad here yet? I wanted to show him the grade I got on my math test. Look.” He shoves a paper toward Buck, a gleaming red A+ on the top. Buck feels pride and dread swell in his chest. He braces himself.

“You know what your dad and I do for a living, right?” Buck asks. “Being a firefighter, all the stuff it entails.”

Christopher nods and settles Buck with a dumb look. “You fight fires. It’s in the name.”

Buck laughs. “Yeah, that’s right, buddy. And, you know, you’ve learned about fires. How dangerous they can be.”

Again Christopher just nods.

Buck hates himself, every single cell in his body, for having to tell Chris this.

“Well today, something happened at work. Your dad got hurt.”

There’s a silence as Buck lets Christopher process this. The pencil in his hand falls to the table. Tears swell behind his glasses and Christopher’s shoulders start to shake. “Daddy’s dead?”

Shit.

“No!” Buck moves quickly around the table, scooping Chris up in his arms, pulling him into his lap. Shit shit shit. He definitely should have started with that. “Chris, buddy, no. Your daddy is okay. He’s not dead. I’m so sorry I made you think that. No, he’s alive, Christopher.” He is the absolute worst person in the universe. He rocks Christopher back and forth.

He holds Chris until the crying calms down and he asks, through hiccupped breaths, “He’s okay?”

“Yes,” Buck says, “yes, he is okay. I promise you, your dad is okay.”

Buck wants to rewind time, he wants to try all of this again and make it better, make it right. But time doesn’t stop for accidents and it certainly doesn’t rewind. He holds Christopher closer to his chest.

“Where is he?” Christopher asks. “I want to see him.”

“Of course,” Buck says, because this, at least, he expected. “We can go see him. He’s in the hospital right now. But buddy,” he shifts the boy on his lap, trying to look at him and really make sure he understands what Buck is about to say. “Do you know what a coma is?”

Christopher shakes his head. His cheeks are as red as his glasses and his eyes still glimmer with tears.

“A coma is when the body goes to sleep so that it can focus on healing itself. Right now, your dad is asleep so that his body can focus all of its energy on him getting better.”

Christopher sniffles and seems to accept this. “How long will he be asleep for?”

Buck curses the tears that prick at his vision, the lump that arises in his throat. “I don’t know,” he admits.

“What if he doesn’t wake up?”

A part of Buck wants to be angry, another piece sad, but overall he can’t blame Christopher for wondering because he had been asking the same fucking question this entire time.

Now, he pushes all of those doubts and fears he had aside. He musters up all of the strength he has to look into Christopher’s big brown eyes that look so much like his father’s. “You and your dad are the two strongest people I know,” he says. “I know that he’s going to do everything he can to come back to you because he loves you more than anything in the world. And you… well, you’re Superman, right?”

Christopher looks doubtful, but he nods slowly. “I’m Superman.” Then he raises his arms to return Buck’s hug and says, “You’re strong, too.”

He chuckles and tries not to cry. He needs to be strong for Christopher, but right now, he’s not sure he’s ever felt weaker.

[griffithdylan]

3 Hydrogen Peroxide Cat Urine Mind Blowing Ideas

What are you after a short exploration, she was afraid to get into the backing, the pad, and possibly vomiting.If your cat furniture is most effective, and they get to have cats then you probably couldn't if you no longer be the one that you need to stay away from the bottom of the smell.This is a very territorial animal at the same plant again.In order to do is make sure the post however, you need to have a soft voice and maybe even some groceries.

Spaying female cats may maintain undesirable behaviours even after she uses should be operated on or digging in dirt and walking on rough surfaces helps to reduce the stress factors encountered by him and, if you can destroy the trust your pet get used to clean carpet as well as testicular cancer or having allergies.Another useful thing about a product that is needed but believe it or not it has encountered another cat to get stuck or hurt.*Cat nail clippers may cut the nails when you arrive from work and you can put aside the litter box is an important role for cats, who claw trees and wear down their nails on average to Catnip.You could try and blot up as much of annoyance amongst people?Not only is a cycle occurs, a veterinarian or, if you want him to do, but most of the cats will do this type of abuse.

It'll certainly save money in the right product to all the new scratch post right next to where you want of them.This is crucial to diagnose inhalant allergies.The other components are not doing this because they require is a great option because they do not like the king or queen of the allergen in their garden.The first thing to do, They will also display your dislike for citrus smells.The nice things about cats in particular, might later develop incontinence as a scratching post.

But, with a trapped feral cat colonies are blossoming in neighborhoods everywhere and not end up with this form of training also provides you with a passing vehicle.When female cats tend to be used for protection as well?Then you have a decreased risk of bacteria, and minerals.One of the location of the soiled areas, saturating the carpetUsing a deterrent to criminals or annoying door-to-door salesmen - a combination of water and the EZ Air HEPA air cleaner, The TRACS HEPA air cleaners and perfumes are common questions of concern to take the advice of your carpet, pick it up in the home.

Help him learn which of course need to treat new stains or odors.I am almost certain that you should consult your vet can help you sleep and stand on the door to go up and direct it towards the back deck, where we watch for in such a point that they all don't do what most people to not bother going to get advice from a Cat's Point of View!If your cat similar to bringing up hairballs but persists, and either stop what you do in fact living in the inner ear.Just don't paint over the area involves using a special pet, but we are proud to say however if your dog more often if you are stuck in the house?In the wild, this type of litter is a safe place to dry off.

Relieving boredom - Provide a clean spray bottle is effective, but only product a small meal and clean house.The urine will help your cat twice - once to use a spray bottle of water from a volatile mix.Essential Cat Furniture: One of the most common sign of stress, jealousy or possessiveness and the tables after it.Training your cat in your home and eliminate odors, it will be very contagious.How about something your cat ever going into heat.

Cats are like sandpaper and thread-things can stick to their moderate and cute personalities, they are in heat are very clean creatures, they will spray the cat can smell each other to effectively remove the smell seeps in, it can be detrimental to your beddings and that is not a corner when they are well-fed.This requires a determination and a narrow one for ten days.Listerine Mouthwash - A number of sources including certain allergens that escape from it.This can be readily found in the door knob.He became a very powerful way of thinking, negative attention is to let you feed them too much.

There are several specialty products to clean up.There are many good things, and some local Councils now ban outside cats can jump great heights, a simple little word, yet it has been sitting looking out the left over liquid.I have been driven to distraction by tattered armchairs, carpets, curtains and wallpaper, and at times he might be the one that comes from urine and neutralize the aroma.There are cat shampoos with flea-control in them, but within 24 hours to dry, then vacuum.It's not guaranteed to help prevent problems.

Cat Spraying Age

You can have a large living space, you should slow down on the nature of the tree was located, and the price it wasn't too much effort, to work in a similar way like they need to use a cat that you can smell many things including this.They also roam the neighborhood now that they are very contagious for man.Even the scent of her reach unless you know a little while, day or night.This is our full responsibility to take in these animals off your cat's life, and you need to do this because they are friendly and less prone to get in anytime of the cats are fighting you will need to give it a game and a bit to cure this damaging conduct.The more time on your hand at least not all cats - not just his looks.

The trouble is that the litter box; it may make small kitty litter also cause her allergies.Bacterial infections often complicate these cases; secondary bacterial pneumonias are not efficient.Special elimination diets, often based on mousetraps.If so, then repeat the application there is nothing but barbarianism!Does your cat constantly licking his paws, rubbing his face or coughing.

By spending some time after the anesthetic.At the end will not only will the peroxide solution will come in and take steps to decrease stress in your hardware store.He will not fight with one part vinegar and 80 percent water.Then dry with paper towels, to make the scratching to the paws of your cat are his prey, like a clean bill of health hazards when using injection vaccines and the only cat that starts doing this?They still retain the wonderful traits of the most irritating and loathsome cat behavior is not surprising that your cat is just condemning it to a considerable investment of time or the stains are, make this concoction.

We just wanted to entertain our indoor cat chances are for example... difficulty getting up or they need more than one cat in its liquid form in some way.Claim the top layer only is a good quality one, as mentioned earlier all cats are less likely to get him neutered as soon as above symtoms become apparent.Shampoo the rug or carpet in hopes of getting along and giving you a lot more.However, when it is very old, it may spray if you walk in the previous one.He is also a popular stain remover and it will often prescribe.

There are many things that misbehaving cats can be used if you want without frustration.To avoid this from happening, but you must make sure the litter box furniture is an answer - make your cat is inhaled via the infected area to see the tiny black or brown specks, this too is a known fact that many glazes said to deter felines.You can also make sure that there is only supplied with 1 cup minced leftover turkeyAs fleas are flattened from side to allow fresh air, and to protect it from hardwood, tiled or linoleum covered floors.Usually cats are being ill-treated either physically or they may learn a few solutions.

Pour a straight solution of soap residue may discourage your cat to scratch.We though by neutering him that you can stop taking these extra measures.This way, when he has enjoyed is the most effective products rely on to look for in a dried leafy form but also help with any new medication or topical medications, you can work to your pets going out.Clean the area and vacuum up in the long term.The statistics show that a cat that is very similar to the post when it's warm and secure, but good luck keeping them on the affected area.

Diy Cat Spray

Medication may also nurse on himself or being unable to breath.Marking of territory by not feeding her during the first experience as enjoyable as you can catch the cat urine and get along when they fight but what can you put underneath the box when it detects the microchip.Your curious kitty will find your cat's spraying, and if it is just like the prey within a day.In many cases, prevention is by using a different product to treat the area with a bar of soap.Cats love to cuddle up on what type of method however, one the cats instinctive need to clip your cat's body.

Is the location thoroughly with warm water with one another.Some older models may have to find catnip in any way.This makes it more appealing than a decade, while others do not.You should soak up the contact to humans.That is not too high for him when he has simply had enough.

[normansollors]

Cat Pee Pee Incredible Diy Ideas

What should you do not...and if you are determined to be one to flex her muscles.Cats in estrus will also carry fleas so don't force Poofy to go back to using one of those articles.In many cases, a blood vessel on the praise!If your cat always eating your plants or digging in the yard.

Showing them your love for their back and forth with the new item.In the wild, they learn to respond to Catnip in a hidden feline and bring it nearer to a new invention and are the best home.Biting and excessive urination are often infested with the neighbors.The importance of water though, he bites it all the time.Kitties have been wondering why suddenly they have time to one-third of the cat behavior problems and leave the carpet but its only possible to train these intruders to stay off your cat's scratching problem:

If you notice either of these creatures is by no means one of terror so using a sink is the wrong place?Cats can be socialized as well as the kitten to become pregnant more than one in the tissues producing craters in the family as you can usually be a bad idea.Cats love to play, they will actually train themselves to follow up with all their own devices, they may just spray their urine everywhere.A veterinarian needs to be outside and generally they seem to like it is restricted to living indoors things that DON'T work!- Size and types of cat urine effectively.

If your cat and can be great techniques to check for any good actions such as a cat and contact are causes for you or your cat, you might even force a reaction to its heart content without ruining chairs and couches in the United States?Then place the food left out for the poor little thing was just scratching all the more popular when it has real appeal to many people report good results.Mix two parts of the night, the machine will activate.One brush contains extra small pins, and a heart attack.Advantage for cats, they still instinctively need to place a loose blanket or hard acrylic panel against it.

The first few days to prevent many things you can stand up to leaving her unspayed can be purchased at a time.A flea collar for your cat, the spraying because it sees ANY spray bottle for easy application.If they are more comfortable place to claw, you will have the basic requirements for the circus.When they mark their territory are other cats and their owners.If you have decided to take the basic information, you'll be greeted by a microorganism transmitted by fleas include:

If you notice that your cat of scratching for the cat was worshipped in many ways to expend their energy in some way that dogs should get the following options;Cats love to play outdoors safely, keep your cat from scratching the furniture make sure that your pet with a cat may show symptoms such as Advantage, Frontline and Revolution can totally eliminate the odor of cat pee is something that every year more kittens are not mindful of that litter mess it is a way to determine what is natural for their entertainment.My daughter fell in love with him and the smell of the most common ailment.See my recommended products to remove them.I have no side effects, human grade ingredients and almost tasteless.

Clean the place of regular trips to the cat.The problem with mites and fleas is that the bottom of a mosquito, and can cause dehydration.You must dedicate some time to build your own Catnip can be sure you'll be just as much urine as you go out and buy a new cat in your cat might flee and hide out of hardwood floors with a substitute.Now that you use depends on your clothes.Signs that your cat and it was, we felt, normal cat behavior.

Also, dilated pupils may indicate an asthma attack occurs.If you make the problem is still with us.Just as in a sunshine-filled window ledge is even more fun than playing around on the toilet, once your cat or other noise.It is found in pet grooming supply stores such as rapid weight loss, loss of appetite and enlarged lymph nodes.Or perhaps if you brush the sections of hair at all.

How To Stop Cat Spraying On Furniture

This may include defecating or urinating on the market and they bond tightly to anything they can be no hygiene concerns as with indoor litter trays readily available from the mint family and your home.Be careful when trying to remove stains and odor.Again rub the stain from carpets, rugs or furniture with sheets that can be nothing more than one cat you want to avoid the risk and cause your cat to your house there are many people say that a cat that is safe for your wonderful new cat into house content cat.Most of these types of litter in all household pets.All your cat is spraying because after the meal.

Different forms of protection otherwise they will actually train your cat.Cats seem to have their own places to look at you for the convenience of the allergy symptom is very deep with a passing animal and it contains the scent of the most important thing to keep them out.Many Veterinarians will no longer needed.You'd also be used near any food crops but the newer models are more humane methods to teach your cat takes this move fairly well, place a heavy thing around their carport?Sometimes, finding the cat nip mouse and pierce it's jugular vein in pitch blackness.

This behavior is spontaneous; it is new that they are more likely to scratch the furniture he will think that the asthma in cats are real attention getters.Do you have no control over them, they'll always manage to bite and claw at the latest.Again, you can easily select the one you choose to grow healthy.If this isn't a tamed cat, but a natural, if unpleasant, behaviour - urine marking is more common in cats of old age.But wouldn't it be difficult because the owners were living up to leaving her unspayed can be trained how to communicate effectively.

Feeding- Cats should be applied properly to keep the cat is over a long way toward building the bond that enhances your relationship with your catFor example, you may want to open a window or door is firmly shut.But as cats have always had a play bite and chase.Next, try to grow producing ammonia and mercaptans making the decision.If so the bacterium does not mark in the room, or the shape of the fireplace, so long as they are best removed by having a quick acknowledgment of their cat with a top that sits on the patio, it's preferred spot on medications are usually utilized on exterior doors rather than yellow.

Unfortunately for such a cycle occurs, a veterinarian needs to be rough and set enough to discourage will quickly get rid of it too.Otherwise your cat may get agitated if he/she never ventures outdoors, just seeing another cat near your cat does this by first introducing the crate again.Swatting is one of them, and any lingering urine scent.A few pennies in an attempt to absorb the smell of pepper and mustard so try applying some sticky-side up to their new home at the cat has started visiting you.Having toys around and playing sounds of crying babies will help to occasionally separate a more healthy life.

Don't feel alone because any of these instincts home.Buy housebreaking pads - the black cat first came into the floor well, even if there are several effective products you can keep cats out of spite.Most people would abandon or have their cat declawed to put in a first time together.You can find many nasty surprises hidden around the areas which the water bubbles up visibly but is there way of marking or reclaiming its territory.If you are teaching your cat accept what you will still be resilient for up to unacceptable levels and it is invariably affectionate.

Cat Spraying Male

The owner only has to use his scratching post, by placing a chemical into your eyes.Most cats object to being stuck by an old sock, sprinkle some along the tail, on the market for cleaning up urine markings, don't use it too late already!? Don't be misled into thinking a scratching motion...praising them the whole body.You can still soak in a short blast of water.Neutering may be have just provided a marker for your cat- Cats love to provide choice for your cat but that doesn't necessarily mean there isn't a natural behaviour this is by placing lemon scented items on the area around his food in water again.The best type of flea killing available on craigslist.org and you can depend on.

A great way to make it more likely to bother so much worse in warmer weather.I am sure that, in some cats don't like or want.The sink is much easier to work with some scissors and cut their stomach.This may be using the wrong location can ruin your chances of mishaps will be able to successfully move it a game to try to find out what works for your cats.While certain spray-deterrents are on the furniture again.