#Cass and Alfred know already tho
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gaywineauntsstuff · 1 month ago
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Broke: everyone fights over whose Batman’s favorite
Woke: everyone fights over whose Dicks favorite bc Dick isn’t an emotionally stunted loser (I shit talk Bruce so much but I love him, he’s just also a loser) and trying to get in the bats favor is like trying to catch sand in a sieve
————
Damian: obviously I’m Graysons favorite I was his Robin
Tim: dude I was the first Robin he trained and we still talk every day I am 100% the favorite
Steph: fuck you! You disappeared off the the face of the earth when he was Batman I was actually here I’m 100% the favorite everyone knows Wing loves me.
Jason: Dick willingly went to Gotham to spend time with me even when he was mad at Bruce. Has Dick ever been in Gotham when he was mad at Bruce for you guys? No? Didn’t think so?
Damian: ….
Steph:…
Tim: that’s because you sucked so much he thought you’d get blown up trying to have to bludhaven.
Jason: oi! Low blow, you can’t use a man’s death against him
Damian: shut up we’ve all died before
Steph: you literally said you were allowed to break Tim’s laptop bc you died b4
Jason: yeah it’s MY DEATH I can use it how I want
Tim: we really gonna call your 14yr old 4’7 self a man?
Cass: he helped me train when B rejected me I’m the favorite
Tim: you can’t be Dicks favorite you’re already Bab’s favorite those are the only 2 likable older members of the family. (They’ve decided Alfred doesn’t count since he’s legally not allowed to have favorites)
Dick: Duke is my favorite
Damian: what?
Tim: how?
Jason: this shit is rigged
Steph: What?? You barely spend time with him?
Duke who has been eating popcorn quietly this whole time:???
Dick: he doesnt steal my suit and murder people
Jason: …
Dick: or tell his friends I threatened to send him to Arkham when I told him to get therapy
Tim:…
Dick: or break into my apartment at 3am because he can’t communicate with his father
Damian:…
Dick: or make me believe he flatlined on the operating table
Steph: …
Dick: or tell me he can’t meet up for a bust because he’s too busy fighting Wonder Woman a hero we work with over text with no context and then go AWOL for 5 days
Cass:…
Dick: or overload his plate with 50 million things I will have to come in and help with
Everyone:
Steph: he started a cult tho??
Dick: was it before or after he was fostered bc if it was before it’s. Not. My. Problem.
Duke: I’m the favorite???
Dick: also I feel like if I died you’re the most likely to take over my duties and not go on a quest for vengeance or try to clone me or put me in the Lazarus pit.
Jason: ID NEVER PUT you in the Lazarus pit…. No comment on the rest tho.
Tim: ditto
Damian: meh you are superior to Todd and he’s relatively functional post the pit I don’t see the issue here.
Steph raising hand: I wouldn’t-
Dick: or help TIM do it
Steph lowering hand:
Dick: plus you have a parent so I don’t have to do 80% of the child rearing while giving Bruce credit
Duke still a little star stuck bc that’s nightwing: IM THE FAVORITE.
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laroserie · 6 months ago
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i love the idea of joining the batfam by dating bruce, but can you imagine how awkward it must be ?
like you are dating bruce, you most probably know he is batman (he couldn't date seriously someone and never tell them) which is like a huge thing, you probably knew each others for at least 5 years and dated for at least 2 before you even step foot in his house and even then ! you still have never meet any of his adopted kids, he always has a way of avoiding The meeting.
of course - you know who his kids are, bruce is ... literally the it guy of gotham, you very much know the names and faces of his family - but that's it (now if you know their vigilantes identities is different story)
the question is, are they aware of your existence ? (of course alfred is aware; that out of the question, he followed to development of yours and bruce relationship from a to z)
going more for a no, not at the start, bruce has this clumsy dumb bilionaire personality but he probably could not like for you to receive media attention because he doesn't wish for your privacy to be intruded upon because you are dating (now there may have been one instance where the paparazzi took a picture of you and him together, but they could only see you from the back, or your face wasn't visible for whatever reason). they probably learnt about your existence very late into your relationship with bruce, and it's surely by accident, like, one of them see a message from you to bruce (and it's something probably something very cheesy) when he left it somewhere by inadvertence. and depending on who see that, they either fully open bruce's phone (sorry but they all know his phone password, bruce isn't aware of that tho) and read your conversation or they find some others way to have access to his messages with you (that isn't so blatant).
they for sure, do an 'emergency' meeting about it (dick and damian were the two that really wanted to do one, the rest probably don't care that much at that time, they probably think you are just the fling of the month for bruce - well usually the fling of the month is not that ... cheesy with him ? in their messages, and the conversations aren't usually that long ... nor do they go back that much. but whatever ! they do suddenly notice that it's been a while, since, well the last fling of the month of bruce but, it must just be a coincidence) which end up with them keeping tabs on you, just in case
now, you meeting them could happen in two way
either they are the one to meet you first - they don't want to wait for bruce to formally introduce you to them - or them to you. the one that 'lead' this is for sure damian, he is determinate to find out your intention with his father (and fight you), dick will lie and say he is just there to make sure everything go 'well' but he is just genuinely very curious about you and the fact that you are dating bruce - this can go for most of them, tho cass and tim are probably the one that are the most reticent to meeting you ? but nevertheless, they still are here, because they for sure won't let damian and dick have all the 'fun'. now jason, is probably also coming for the shit and giggle.
or you meeting them could happen because of bruce - deciding that it's finally time you meet his kids, so he invite all of them to dinner telling them he was someone he wants them to meet, and telling you explicitly that he wants you to meet his family (and the people that are part of his family but aren't family family) - of course, he could talk about it with you first, he could never force you into that. the meet - dinner, probably do not go in the way bruce hoped for it to go (but truth be told, he wasn't expecting it to go the way he wished it did). it's not awful, nothing bad happen. it's just awkward. one of them (probably jason) let slip that they already knew about you - damian make it very clear that he doesn't accept you (and dick has to try to diffuse the situation and tell you that damian is just joking - damian is not joking and he gives a death glare to dick), tim probably do not say anything of half of the dinner before asking you a weird question about something he should have no information about (like what's up with one of your weird habit / quirk), cass is just silent - she assess you for the entirety of the dinner (she conclude by the end of it that you quite a nice person and that she likes you quite a bit), duke is very kind and is very polite with you (he is a bit apprehensive and isn't sure why he is there but he figures it's because bruce wanted to have at least one regular person treating you normally - dick is too ... enthusiastic for that role)
at the end of said dinner, when bruce is driving you home, it's probably the most silent ride home you have ever experienced. until you burst out laughing - the dinner was probably the funniest shit you experienced. it felt like it came straight out of a shitty tv show with 14 seasons. sure it was very much awkward but still funny ! you reassure bruce that it was fine, though you could have liked a warning.
and ... you can add a yandere twist on it, and i love yandere so ... . some of them (tim and cass and probably dick) could start developing yandere tendencies when they learn of your existence ( and keep 'tab on you' aka stalks you and learn everything they can about you ), the others (damian and jason + eventually steph and duke even though they are probably some of waaay lesser yandere-y yandere) could start becoming like that after they finally meet you in person. damian could be the one to take the most or less time to become attach on you, it depend, but he could go thru a big phase of 'i refuse for you to replace talia, my mother, therefor i will despite your entire existence' but if you try to get closer to him, this phase will end very soon and his barrier melt away, if you want to let him take his time to accept you, the result will be the same but damian will try to make up for the time he hated you.
and of course, yandere bruce could be so happy for you to like / get to know and get closer to his family, and that's one more way he can tie you to him !
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e-nonsense · 1 month ago
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Damian x older batsis. Just something fluffy about batsis being the older sister of the batfam, mainly focusing on Damian tho- she dotes on him and is kinda like his mother figure in a way. And when he gets into arguments with Bruce, she's the one he runs away to, to crash on her couch. She's also incredibly tech savy and inventive, so she often asks Damian to test her gagetry prototype's since everyone else is scared of them (they sometimes malfunction). She's more like Alfred's apprentice than Bruce’s. She prefers working "behind the screens." Also, her and Damian most definitely took the batmobile and batwing out on joy rides without permission🤭
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“That’s bullshit, dad.” You scoffed, leaning back against the cold stony wall in the cave. Bruce sighed, pinching his nose between his index and thumb. He was used to this, he had been getting this lecture since he adopted Dick when you were 12. You’d always been motherly to your little brothers — a term Jason often huffed about, reminding you that he’s no longer a fifteen year old boy.
You became all of their protectors but it was different with Damian, something deeper, more connected. Dick assumed that it was because you and Damian were blood related but Alfred knew better.
“You can’t treat the kid like shit and expect him to be okay,” you added.
Right now Damian was in your car, an overnight bag packed for his stay at your house. Bruce wanted to smile at the fact that you drove all the way from Blüdhaven to get Damian and yell at him.
“You’re right,” Bruce says, making you pause and point a finger at him comically opening and closing your mouth as you think. Stunned into silence that he hadn’t tried arguing with you, Jason snickered in the background before Cass knocked him to the ground beating him again.
“He should spend the weekend with you, no suit, no cape. Just as a normal boy,” Bruce stands up, “I can’t give him that, his mother can’t, that’s why he comes to you.”
You merely nodded in response as Bruce patted your shoulder before turning back to his computer, you walked past Alfred who looked equally as stunned as you before chuckling and handing you a tub of freshly baked cookies.
“Thanks,” you mumbled, still somewhat shocked as you make your way up the stairs to the exit of the cave. You’re back outside the manor and sitting in the drivers seat of your car — your bike at home because you knew you’d be bringing damian to your place.
“okay, all set?” you ask, looking at the small boy in your front passenger seat. a bunch of his art supplies stuffed into you back seat and alfred the cat perched on top of it all, you snort amused by the sight, exiting the driveway when he nods.
the drive to your place is quiet, damian dozing off from time to time. “can i live with you?” he asks out of nowhere, green eyes focused on your reaction, you stop at the red light, sighing softly.
“i’m sorry dames, but we’ve talked about this.” you mutter, shooting him an apologetic look, “i’ll talk to bruce about it again.” you offer, he nods.
“i’d like that,” he mutters, arms crossed. you smile, “where would you go to school?” you ask, entertaining the idea. “we’ve got quite a few good ones in bludhaven.”
“which did you go to?” he asks.
“i went to a gotham school, but i did uni in bludhaven. somehow gotham and bludhaven have two of the best universities. no idea why that happened when they’re both shit holes.”
“agreed.”
the rest of the drive is quiet, your brother falling asleep for the rest of it. you chuckle as you park outside your flat, you and dick lived in the same building. it was a lot more convenient, and it eased his worry for you. you being a lawyer, with your little side hobby of building impressive gadgets.
dick was usually the first person to get ahold of the tech you made, and damian would be next in line. you’re careful as to not stir damian, though you know he’s probably already half awake as you lift him out of the car, carrying him into the elevator after you toss his duffel bag over your shoulder. alfred the cat following after the two of you.
he likes this, he thinks. being coddled like child — he is a child, you’re always quick to remind him. you lay him down on the spare bed in your extra room where your other siblings crash. he kicks his shoes off sleepily as you set the bag down in the corner of the room, alfred the cat jumping up onto the bed to sleep on top of damian.
you smile at the sight as you close his bedroom door.
your little brother deserves to be a kid, you’ll make sure his life isn’t spent like yours.
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© e-nonsense. do no copy/steal/translate. do it and I’ll bite your toes off
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demonic0angel · 4 months ago
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DPxDC Next Generation Kids (click for clarity)
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Continue reading for notes and introductions :)
1) Jove Bryce Wayne (11) - Steph and Cass’ adopted son. He trains under Cass and Bruce, and is widely admired by the other kids for creating his own fighting style with the dancing skills he gets from practicing with his mom (to his delight). Fun fact, he is albino!
2) Marillyn “Mari” Maddy Grayson-Nightingale (10) - Dick and Dan’s daughter. She was an accidental pregnancy, but both of her dads love her very much. Fun fact, she gained her baba’s personality and is rather rebellious and mischievous, which causes Dick to feel sympathetic for Bruce.
3) Elinor “Ellie” Catherine Nightingale (9) - Jason and Jazz’s eldest daughter. She, along with Mari, train under Dick, Jason, and Jazz in order to protect themselves. Fun fact, she looks and acts just like Jason when he was young.
4) Thomas “Tommy” Bruce Drake (5) - Tim, Dani, and Kon’s oldest son. He is an evil genius who uses his cuteness to take over the world. Fun fact, the entire PhantomBat family have given up on convincing him not to, so now they’re just trying to instill morals into him and stall for time (they still love him tho).
5) Marianne “Ann” Talia Nightingale (5) - Jason and Jazz’s youngest daughter. She is Alfie’s twin and is the fun and sunshine to Ellie’s seriousness and Alfie’s gloominess. Fun fact, she got her blonde hair from Sheila Haywood, but she doesn’t know that.
6) Alfonso “Alfie” B Nightingale (5) - Jason and Jazz’s youngest son. He is Ann’s twin and is rather gloomy and antisocial compared to his sisters. Fun fact, he supposedly looks like Bruce when he was young, so he gets away with a lot when dealing with Alfred.
7) Rain Axel Nightingale (4) - Danny and Valerie’s son. He is Misty’s twin and can be rather mischievous, often causing trouble and chaos for the fun of it. Fun fact, he often teams up with Mari to prank everyone in the most ridiculous ways possible.
8) Misty Lilith Nightingale (4) - Danny and Valerie’s daughter. She is Rain’s twin, and is even more shy than Alfie and can start crying when stressed. Fun fact, although she can be anxious easily, her temper is even worse than her mom’s.
9) Ken-el / Kenneth “Kenny” Clark Drake (1) - Tim, Dani, and Kon’s youngest son. Since he is the youngest, he is doted on the most. Fun fact, he has already unlocked most of his halfa abilities due to his Kryptonian heritage.
Notes:
+ Jove’s name relates back to Cassandra’s because they are both names of mythological characters. Jove is another name for Jupiter (AKA Zeus).
+ Both of Mari’s names are actually a weird, mashed up version of Madeline and Mary (and also inspired by Mar’i cough).
+ Jason and Jazz’s daughters are named after Elinor and Marianne from Sense and Sensibilities and their middle names are from Jason’s mother figures in life. I imagine that Jazz had a falling out with Jack and Maddie, so she didn’t really care.
+ Alfie’s name is inspired from Alfred and his middle name is only “B” because Tommy was born first and Tim took the “Bruce” middle name.
+ Alfie and Ann, and Misty and Rain are inspired by Misty and Jackson, the canon kid characters of Sam and Danny. Both pairs of twins have an 8 month difference of age.
+ Why so many twins?? I used the twin idea first for Jazz and Jason, but when I thought of Danny and Valerie, I kept switching between ideas, so I eventually settled on twins for them too. Trust, it was a weird coincidence for Danny and Jazz too when they had twins at nearly the same time.
+ Misty and Rain’s middle names come from Tucker and Sam (Axel Foley and the episode “Life Lessons”). Their first names are inspired by Misty Fenton and I just found another name for Rain to match the theme.
+ Tommy and Kenny technically have different dads, (Tommy is Tim and Dani’s, and Kenny is Kon and Dani’s), but it doesn’t really mean anything, since they don’t pay attention to it.
+ The idea of Tommy, who is like Tim’s clone and absolutely evil, was so funny to me. He’s prob my fav child OC. His entire family know about his manipulative tendencies but he loves them so they let it go. (Damian and Dan have already pledged their allegiance to their future overlord.)
+ The short period of time where Jazz, Dani, and Valerie were pregnant at the same time was hell on earth for everyone.
+ Technically, Bruce only has 7 grandchildren (he cries when he thinks about it a little too hard), but bc they’re so close to Rain and Misty, Bruce thinks of them as his grandchildren too, so he always says he has 9. Danny and Val are like ??? But Rain and Misty totally believe that he’s their grandpa (which he is delighted about).
+ Damian is married to Jon and they have no kids, unless you count the farm they inherited and all of the animals that Damian adopted as his fur babies. However, Damian was young when the kids kept coming, so he became the designated babysitter and then the favorite uncle, which all of the other Batboys despise and are jealous of.
+ Marillyn's age, as well as Misty and Rain's existences, might still be changed by me, just bc at times, it doesn't suit my headcanons or just doesn't make sense in the timeline. So those are susceptible to change.
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ultimate-marysue · 6 months ago
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Batkids but instead of being pigs they're first responders.
Obviously Dick should be a firefighter, I'm not the first to come up with this and it's so brilliant. Overworked, underappreciated, the backbone of society. I get that he was a cop so he could investigate the corruption at BHPD, but there are other ways. I just think that the self sacrificial part would call to him.
Barbara would obviously be a 911 operator. That one is self explanatory, it's half her job.
Cass could also be on the Firefighter team, probably in the maritime rescue unit. She's vibing in her little boat zooming around the toxic waste of Gotham Harbor. Unbothered queen.
Jason would be specialized in dealing with shock victims and handling the psychological part. I'm not sure who handles that in US, but some time of on site counselor/therapist. You know, the guy that talks to victims before the police starts questioning. He is the most emotional of the Batkids and I want to see him channel it towards compassion more often (kinda like how he's always kind to prostitutes, the homeless and children in canon).
Steph would be in CPS handling the victims that are minors, especially providing legal advice and helping to protect them from police bullshit. Either that or EMT with Tim.
Tim would be a very stressed EMT. I'm a sucker for Tim working in the medical field. Based on what? Vibes. Also he's been physically fucked up so much in canon I think he could get a degree from personal experience. That or 911 operator with Barbara
Duke would be Firefighter, but particularly the search and rescue expert. In hard cases with little to no evidence he uses his powers to find out where the missing person went. He has to be careful not to get caught tho.
I think Damian would want to be either a 911 coordinator (he is the natural choice of a leader of course TT) or an actual ER doctor because his father never finished school and Alfred (grandpa) already had a place saved for the degree so someone has to graduate. If he actually got it he would give so much shit to the others for dropping out.
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It's literally impossible to read bat fanfiction because it's all based off those ridiculous fanon tropes that spread like crazy and people take as fucking biblical!!!!! Dick was never a jerk to Jason when he was Robin- they got along because Dick is mature as hell and in one retelling- Jason was a jerk to him!! And when he came back as Red Hood he had literally not a single damn reason to treat Dick like shit! Not a damn one! But he did, didn't he? Cause he's the fucking asshole! How dare you make Dick grovel towards that bastard! Dick has only ever tried to help him! Reached out during his Batman run, over and over! Also- Dick never put Jason in Arkham with Joker just a few cells down???? What the fuck! The Joker and all those other fuckers had been broken out of Arkham by Black Mask already for like the whole run??? Jason went to Arkham after losing to Dick, and Gordon put him in there because One he fucking deserved it, Two the literal circumstances?? And at that point!! Arkham was fucking rehabilitated itself!! By Dick!!! Because Bruce had him go undercover there for real, and Dick was actually tortured there before he got out!! So Dick put in the work to get that shit in order to actually help people!!
Dick never chose Damian over Tim- Tim refused to engage with him over his grief, shut him out, and left of his own devices! He never told Dick his suspicions on why Bruce was alive, never! And Tim is not the one to bring Bruce back either, there's a whole team at that point! Dick learns Bruce is alive through tossing his 'dead' body into a pit and the body comes to life as a zombie. Tim didn't tell him shit! Tim is also not a little crybaby- Damian cutting his line was a fucking blip on the page, he was momentarily shocked, that was it! He put Damian on his Hit List, which is why Damian cut his line. And his first attempt at "murder" is just pushing Tim off the dinosaur statue in the cave, he didn't go all assassin on him! Also Dick wasn't even there the first incident and wasn't told about the second incident. Alfred is the one who gave Damian Robin and Dick accepted him because he saw that Damian needed help! He needed guidance! He didn't fucking fire Tim the way Bruce fired him, and fuck all of you for thinking that Tim or Jason or fucking anyone has more right over Robin than Dick Fucking Grayson! He tried to promote Tim and Tim walked off. How dare yall make Dick fucking grovel towards that bastard!!!
Jason did try to kill all three of them!! Why does everyone just gloss over that like what the fuck??? Why does he get a pass for every shitty thing he's done??? "Bad writing" stfu this is the same dude that without hesitation kills random criminals, people who deal drugs, do you know how many random ass people deal drugs??? Jason doesn't give a single shit about being his own type of hero or saving Gotham his own way, nor do the people think of him as their savior!! Are you people fucking delusional?? I saw a post that said citizens would trust Jason over CASS and I cannot Believe the hallucinations yall are seeing???
It is literally downright impossible to find fics about Dick or Damian or Cass or fucking any of them that doesn't include these literal bullshit fanon takes!!! It's impossible!!! This fandom sucks!!!! You don't even need to go buy the comics, all these popular takes have been debunked right here on tumblr!!!! Also Dick can do literally everything!! He's hypercompetent as hell, die mad about it!! Jason doesn't like Wonder Woman???? Where the fuck did that come from??? Wayne Family Adventures is not real!!! Those people could not BE more out of character!!! Look at Bruce for crying out loud!!! Yall know that man ain't act like that!
Edit: leaving this here in case anyone wonders what my hot take is towards this question I was asked: "have you considered tho, that fanon is more fun..."
Well of course fanon is more fun if you're a fan of Jason or Tim. Fanon actively caters towards those two pasty white boys. Fanon actively shits on Dick and Damian though. And for Dick? He literally never did that shit! It is all made up! It's literal character assassination?? But by the fans?? And for Damian? He was 10!!! He grew up as an assassin! He was actively trying to grow with Dick's help! How can yall see him as the bad guy?? And not the literal bad guy, (Jason), and the 17 teen year old who literally fought him back btw, (Tim), like old boy did not act victimized the way you people portray. And Jesus for Cass? Cass is just a prop in fanon. So what exactly about this should be fun to me? Like seriously.
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estupidapendejaestupida · 29 days ago
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My selkie Batfam AU! Where selkies are not only seals/aquatic animals, but can be other animals. Born with their pelt, and if they are separated from them since their birth it doesn’t really hurts them, but it makes them feel very empty, like they are missing something very, very important, but they don’t know why (kinda like Crack baby, by Mitski).
Bruce: lion (black) like his parents were.
Dick: wolf (grey)
Barbara: human
Jason: bear (brown)
Tim: human, but not really (lynx).
Stephanie: human
Damian: lion (brown) like Thalia.
Cass: tiger
Duke: human
Alfred: human
Who else should i have?
Ideas so far:
• Tim being mocked by Jason (during the attack at TT) and Damian (during his murder attemps) for being the only robin to be human. And btw, he isn’t living in the manor, he stays in The Nest.
• Damian being taught that he was bigger than his other soul and animal instincts, that if he wanted to be strong and worthy he had to control his animal soul and stop needing it or using it.
• I think I like the idea of Steph being a rat or something small like her mother, and her dad being all like “you useless fuck, ofc you had to be something weak and insignificant, you are weak just like your mother and blah blah blah”. Tell me what you think about it, and well make a decision together.
• Babs being human and not understanding selkie’s at all when she first began working with the bats, but then when she finds that B and Dick are both selkies she just becomes a master about their selkie cultures and habitats and how to treat with them and learns what to do and what not to do. So when another human of the pack needs help understanding one of the selkies, they ask for her help. Except Tim, tho. He kind of always got them at the first try… weird, huh?
• Alfred has to raise young selkie Bruce Wayne all alone after the Waynes' death, and as a human, he tried to teach him how to be a selkie. But a mere human is not really a good mentor for a selkie.
• Slade taking Dick’s pelt away when he was training him, and Dick suffering through feeling like half of his soul had been snatched from him. Feeling it so close, yet too far. And being forced to obey Slade’s every order, until he manages to take his pelt back and scape.
• Jason’s pelt getting burned in Ethiopia, and Bruce keeping it locked away, so when Jason comes back to life he is easier to manipulate by Thalia saying that Bruce threw away his pelt after he replaced him. And Jason blaming that on Tim when he attacks him on TT.
• SPOILER ALERT: Tim’s mom is a selkie, but since she got pregnant with Tim, she stayed as a human and hid her pelt away. She was hoping for Tim to be born completely human, and instead, he was born a selkie. She hid it from her husband, thinking that this way, taking his pelt since birth, he would grow to not need it and could live a normal life just like his human father. She did write a separate testament from his husband, way before she died, where she left a box for Tim. Inside the box is his pelt, and a letter explaining everything. Tim only gets to that box after she dies, and his dad enters a vegetative state after the accident overseas. The thing is that Tim never quite opens the box. He just leaves it somewhere well hidden in his old room at the Wayne manor. And since he never stays the night in his old room anymore, he just never got around to open it. One day, he will, tho.
Please tell me if I should keep this up? I already have a draft done, so if you guys like this idea, I'll publish it :3
I'll write many fics for every character, so it's not very 'one character centric'
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bubblesxo · 10 months ago
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for my gotham!bruce de-aging au
bruce casually calling every single rogue by their real name. sometimes their first name, sometimes their last name, sometimes their full government name (he's coming from mid-s5 so he'll probably call the riddler edward nygma while scowling profusely. still depends tho).
the batfam progressively gets more and more confused as to how bruce knows every single rogue in gotham at the age of 18. then when he refers to the joker by jeremiah they just lose it.
"you knew who the joker is the whole time?? how come you never told us??!! you led us to believe it was a big mystery that no one in gotham could ever figure out!!"
bruce's response would just be "well him and his crazier twin brother have been very publicly known multiple times so if you haven't somehow come across this information yourself then i've got reason to doubt you're all *actually* detectives."
jason starts frothing at the mouth in rage. babs and tim knew the whole time (babs because her dad was there?? he was basically the general in a war?? he definitely never told her about it aside from vague advice he never contextualizes but people come up to him sometimes and thank him for various things he's done over the course of the show. tim because that boy was on the streets so much as a kid when he snuck out that he's heard ALL of the stories that people refuse to talk about in polite society for fear of scaring the children/offending sensibilities. and tim loved answers. jason was just trying to survive and stay distinctly out of rogue business when he was on the streets.). dick is a bit offended because he's been with him for over a decade?? but ultimately begrudgingly understands a bit because there is a lot of stuff he hasn't told bruce about and the way he says the name reminds him of himself in his worst moments. damian is angry (and will be even more so when he finds out abt ra's) and just storms off. duke kind of didn't want to know (he has too much joker trauma already). steph is just like ?? but not that bad bcuz she still says that he's "not her dad!!" so how could she feel like he doesn't trust her? (ignore her being lowkey hurt.) cass is on her dad's side 100% (even more so because tim doesn't seem surprised).
basically it's a whole mess and it's not going well but alfred explicitly forbade them from ever mentioning the joker around bruce again so they can't really do anything about it (for now). hehehhe
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rizzanon · 3 days ago
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I wrote that in the comments but I am really curious about your opinion in this so I copied it.
“You know I just realized something (if I remember correctly). They always said that she was a liability or that they should have protected her but I don’t know how about they start realizing that the reader wasn’t weak she just wasn’t trained. I mean you mentioned (I hope I remember correctly) in a previous chapter how they trained her for a short time and then dropped her to focus on Damian, Cass and Stephanie and all these above already had previous training (I think). So she wasn’t weak they just never really trained her, she had to figure it out on her own (same goes with Tim instead of explaining some cases he reacted annoyed that’s why she stopped asking). I hope this makes sense English isn’t my first language.”
So what I want to question will they figure it out someday if yes how do they react and will I don’t know duke for instance confront them. And I said duke because Alfred is dead and duke idk he just doesn’t seem delusional so he will maybe in someway figure it out with for example surveillance footage in the batcave where he sees Barbara focusing on Steph and cass and pushing the reader to the sidelines or where she never really pushed reader so that she will improve. Sorry for the long ask first time I am sending one.😭😅
well, to start things, i wouldn’t say reader was never reallt trained. she has been trained properly in some areas of defense and offense, because bruce definitely wouldn’t send one of his kids out to fight crime if they didn’t at least have some form of training lol. but yes, although reader definitely had some training, she got “pushed aside” as the batfam had to focus on Cass first, and then Damian’s arrival, and then Steph becoming batgirl as well. so there were a lot of factors that came into reader being ultimately tossed aside.
and to answer your question, yes, the batfam will eventually realise how neglectful they’ve been towards reader (both universes) how exactly? im still working on that and the flow of it lol 😅🫠
ty for your question tho!!
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anxiousnerdwritings · 2 years ago
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since we on the ropic of sibling reader can you imagine how pissed bruce + batfam (and alfred, to a degree) would be if like talia ever did get with sibling!reader, she'd be smug af bcuz if bruce's sibling lives in the manor, it gives her a chance to see her love and her ex in one trip. cut to damian standing in the back conflicted that his uncle/aunt has the chance to become another mom/dad but also looking at his mother like "why are you dating my uncle/aunt 😦🤨"
can you imagine tho bruce throwing an aggressive fit if his sibling chooses to date Hal of all people?? Clark, Diana? He's sees the appeal tbh; he won't be too happy, but he sees the vision. Oliver, Dina? another pair of 'sees the appeal'. But Hal???? no no no bruce is shutting that shit down and fast. Barry is really the only safe option and even then he can quite literally sweep his sibling off their feet and away from the safety of the manor.
i want to imagine that the kids feel very strongly against this but also play matchmaker yk?? like some do it to piss bruce off (mainly jason, damian) and a few others do it for the drama (steph + cass by association, dick). the rest are a mix of both.
Talia totally takes pleasure in rubbing it in Bruce’s face that she’s with his sibling now and she loves seeing Bruce affected by it. He’s not jealous that she’s with someone else, let alone his sibling, honestly he couldn’t care less about that. No, it’s the fact that his sibling is in a relationship in general. Bruce is very much the type who thinks that no one is worthy of being with his sibling and no matter what they will never meet his standards for being a romantic partner to his beloved sibling who more than deserves the world and everything else. Not to mention Bruce knows damn well that Talia plans to take the Reader with her eventually and he’s having none of that.
I could kind of see Damian actually wanting the Reader to be more of a mother/father to him, they already act like one to him so why not officially become his second mom/dad. It wasn’t really until Talia was very open with her romantic intentions towards the Reader that had Damian really leaning towards making it all happen. I could also see Damian being very bratty and extremely jealous thinking of the Reader becoming a parent and having a family of their own that didn’t include him. As far as he’s concerned his aunt/uncle is already like another mom/dad to him and to have their focus and affections being taken off of him really irritates and frustrates him to no end. But when Talia mentions offhandedly about taking the Reader home with her, all bets are off and he’s fighting to keep them with him and Bruce. Unless the Reader was actually willing to go with Talia and start a life with her and the League of Assassins then Damian may be willing to go with them, not only to keep an eye on the Reader but also to stay with them as well.
All the batkids have their own OTP ships for the Reader and they would definitely play matchmaker to make it come true. Mush to Bruce’s horror and disdain. His own kids are going against him when it comes to the Reader’s love life. While he believes they shouldn’t have one whatsoever, the kids have their own ideas of what the Reader’s love life should really be. Also, this is all totally happening behind the Reader’s back without their knowledge. And I have no boyfriend that all the Reader’s suitors have and will continue to make impromptu and uninvited visits to the manor to see and spend time with the Reader. Whether the romantic yanderes were in actuality invited by/planned with the respective Baylis shipping them with the Reader or they came of their own accord to be around the Reader is debatable. But it certainly gets on Bruce’s nerves. Hell, even Alfred has his own ship of who the Reader should end up with adding more towards the betrayal Bruce feels with everyone in the batfamily going against him like this.
Just imagining Bruce’s reaction to Hal pulling up to the manor to take the Reader out on a date is so hilarious. I can’t help but see him being the one to answer the door only to slam it in Hal’s face when he sees him. If the Reader is adamant about going out with Hal then Bruce would totally be sat on their bed the whole time they’re getting ready trying to persuade them to cancel or at least go for someone else other than Hal. Bruce just Turing into a bratty sibling is just too funny not to think about. He definitely glares daggers at Hal the whole time he’s there. The only compromise Bruce could come to is either having the Reader and Hal’s date at the manor so it can be monitored or the date turning into a double date with Bruce and either Selina or some random woman he takes out just so he can keep an eye on his precious sibling. (I can’t help but imagine not only Bruce but the rest of the batfamily dressed in hilarious disguises spying on the Reader and whoever they’re on a date with. Or even the respective yandere’s rival suitors doing the same thing too.)
If you think Bruce’s reaction to his sibling dating Hal is bad, imagine how he takes to learning the Reader is going out with Guy Gardner.
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b0nes-mcgee · 1 year ago
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It’s time for music headcanons with the batfam, bc if I don’t get this out of my head and onto page, I’m going to implode.
Fave first, Dick is definitely a indie pop/indie rock kinda boy. Not just because I identify with that, but also bc he gives me those overly energetic, bubbly vibes, that I feel like only come from Grouplove, Vampire Weekend, and Adam Melchor. I also feel like he’s a Mitski and Boygenius kinda bitch, bc ough, boY, he has angst. Said angst can only be expressed through sad girl music, bc he will die before he ever expresses his feelings about anything to anyone.
NEXT we have Jason, I think he’s an emo ass boy, ngl, but specifically like folk punk. He listened to twin sized mattress one time, broke down crying, and hasn’t looked back. Also things like The Mountain Goats, PUP, or Modern Baseball. Ugh, I could make a whole ass playlist for this boy. If he’s with other ppl, I think he’d play something more mainstream of the emo genres, like Arctic Monkeys or The Strokes.
DAMIAN, I THINK, IS COMPLICATED. So, for one thing, he grew up in a weirdo environment, where they probably never listened to music, and if they did, it was “”tasteful”” music, for rich ppl. That, or it was culturally significant. So, I think I’m his exposure to music after moving in with Bruce, he started just absorbing absolutely all the music he could. Like, he’s an everything enjoyer. His spotify liked songs are a minefield, bc one second it’ll be playing Chet Baker, next it’s Viagra Boys, then some country shit, then Chopin, and then it’s Lil Nas X.
BABS, I think, would be a folk music/sad girl music enthusiast. She really likes Ryan Adams, Phoebe Bridgers, Hoizer, Mitski, etc. It’s something that she and Dick bonded over when they first started dating. I think with her, she appreciates the calm/slightly sad music bc she lives in a rlly crazy world, and she just wants to meditate a little when she’s sitting at that desk all day, trying to keep her family and friends alive.
Timmyyyyyy is a Kpop enjoyer. Sorry, I don’t make the rules. Specifically, he probably likes SEVENTEEN or ATEEZ a lot. He actively tries, every day of his life, to not stan any of the members, but it’s rlly hard when he’s had two hours of sleep in the past week, and Yoon was just really cute in that last interview. I also think he’s really into trap and pop. He knows all the lyrics to every recent song on the top 100 list.
Duke, I think is really into R&B. I think he’s amenable to pop/rock/rap, etc., but he really just wants something to belt out. Common occurrences are finding him in the kitchen, making an omelette, singing Amy Winehouse at the top of his lungs. If u catch him doing it tho, he gets rlly shy. His guilty pleasure is theatre music. He has to bribe his family to go see Little Shop of Horrors with him.
Stephanie has a 2000s-2010s pop addiction. Anything that makes her feel like Hannah Montana is her SHIT. She’s out here blasting Bubblegum Bitch and early Taylor Swift. You also can and will find her crying to sad One Direction songs. When she’s moody, she will unironically play My Chemical Romance. She understands pop punk a lil bit, but the lyrics tend to get male-manipulator-y, so she sticks with the bands she already knows.
Alfred likes 50s/60s jazz/pop. Frank Sinatra, Chet Baker, etc. It reminds him of home, and of his family. He also really likes old French music, like Joe Dassin. I’m ngl, I don’t know old music enough to add more to this one, but u get the idea 😭
BRUCE. Ugh. He’s definitely the kind of dad who never moved past the music of his childhood. He firmly believes that the Beatles is the best band of all time, and no one can convince him otherwise. I think he tends to gravitate towards the rock/goth end of 70s/80s music, so things like the Cure, New Order, maybe a lil bit of Siouxsie and the Banshees. His goth phase was INTENSE, Alfred can attest to this.
Edit: HOLY SHIT I CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT CASS 😭😭😭
Ok, Cass is defo a similar situation to Damian, grew up with literally silence, so music is a super new thing to her. But I think she really enjoys all kinds of genres. I think that especially instrumentals get her, bc it’s just noises that she can focus on, no lyrics to distract her from the sound. I think she also likes to “sing” along to said instrumentals, but mostly it’s just making noises to the same beat and sound, but it’s very off-key.
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tiajk · 1 year ago
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Here are the black batsis head cannons
warnings: crack, Love lots of it, shitty parents, sibling bonds, things that only make sense to black people, so sad racism, your a vigal i’m this
This is one of the things you guys voted so here you
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So for the sake of the plot you are very very african like you have the accent and everything (it can be whatever you imagination chooses light heavy whatever ) bruce had known you through a drug deal he had busted your father he's was selling drugs when bruce chases him all the way to your apartment your home he had found your mother overdosed your father now where to be found and you just sleeping in the room
You waking up when you feel a certain caped crusader watching you in your sleep
When gordon and the police came they took your mother to the hospital she didn't make it your father they caught him at the bar and he is going to prison for the rest of his life
Gordon knows he has a thing for kids that need a home
You had gone home with im the next day and had been apart of the batfam ever since
You had been adopted right after Jason so that made you the first girl (before he died) Dick was 17 Jason was 12 you were 11
You and dick weren’t that close because of the age gap but he made it work he visited the manor more for you and Jason like going on missions together and dropping you off to school you made fun of his red head fetish a lot tho
you and Jason were the closet because of your age but you guys shared some of the same interest reading is the most common one. something you guys do a lot is trade books you will read his stuff and he’ll read your it’s like a little book club
now you and tim were very rough at first of course you were mourning jason’s death and tim comes along it was alot,for you but you loved him no matter what
Damian….when you guys met he thought you were like everyone else unimpressive and unimportant but you treated him the same way it only lasted for a week when he saw you in the garden drawing the scenery a way to relax but you guys relate to each other the most because your both not white it’s connects you guys more
Stephanie and you were close asf she was always in love with who you are and your confidence you guys would always have girl days with cass ofc she would do you make-up a lot she wants to experiment because the boys are all the same and Damian won’t let her (unless you ask him)
now you and cass when she came to the manor she didn’t talk much and your were just fine neither that you were her voice in situations and when she started to talk you were so proud of her you always helped her no matter what
NOW U AND DUKE WERE LOCKED INN you guys are the only African-american people in the house so y’all just did things that made sense to you guys like taking your shoes off in the house, WASHING the chicken before you season it but anyways whenever the family said some where people things y’all gave each other the “I know he didn’t just say/do that” the family doesn’t understand for example one time it was your birthday your 21st birthday you had 2 of the biggest and i mean biggest party possible the first one was for bruce’s friends and all the fake bitches that were only there for money and show themselves off
the second party was for your friends and siblings like the justice leagues kids and every true friend you’ve grown to love over the years after cleaning the party you guys would hear a noise from down the hall jason and his bright mine said let’s go check it out before the rest of the fam could find you two y’all had already bolted sure you were vigilantes but you were not doing no scary shit tonight
Alfred he loved you with all his heart dont tell the others but your his favorite he teaches you how to cook his food and you can do it perfect your the only one who hasn’t and ever will get a ban from the kitchen
Bruce and you weren’t always the nicest to each other but you love each other to death your just like him a workaholic and doesn’t take brakes unless there needs to be sometimes not even Alfred can pull you away but bruce comes and carry’s you like the little girl he wish you still were you TRY and i mean TRY to teach him how to cook it’s terrible tho
Selina was like your mother too you she thought you how to be strong like nothing else you guys went on a few heist together she always listens to you when no one else does she’s always there for you
One thing that the batfam will do for any and all is protect one another from racism,villains anything
you also got flirted with a lot by wally,roy, anything that could lay there eyes on you and they all hated it
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ao3feed-brucewayne · 7 months ago
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That one time Bruce Wayne didnt adopt a child but got adopted instead
by Pookie_Killer Words: 452, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Danny Phantom Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Categories: Multi Characters: Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Damian Wayne, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Duke Thomas, Barbara Gordon, Jazz Fenton, Maddie Fenton, Jack Fenton (Danny Phantom), Danny Fenton, Sam Manson, Tucker Foley, Bernard Dowd, Alfred Pennyworth, Various Rogues, Vlad Masters, Damian Wayne’s many pets Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Character Death, mostly through jokes, is it main character death if it happened before the fic x2, Don’t do what Timmy does. He’s vv unhealthy, also don’t do as Danny does. He’s a literal ghost, speaking of, Danny Fenton is a Little Shit, Jack Fenton is hyper and a bit crazy, Maddie Fenton is a tad calmer and also crazy., We love them for it tho, Damian and Tim pretend to fight to get what they want, the rest of the Batman is clueless., except Cass. We love Cass, Tim drake is a freak with his coffee, Tim Drake is Red Robin, Jason Todd is Red Hood, Damian Wayne is Robin, Bruce Wayne is Batman, Cassandra Cain is Black Bat, Stephanie Brown is Spoiler, Duke Thomas is Signal, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, danny fenton is phantom, Jazz Fenton Is So Done, Jazz is TIRED of gaining new family via overly-adoptive billionaires, even tho this is only the 2nd time it happened., Somewhat happy Batfam, theres still problems but not big ones ya get me?, Jack and Maddie get mistaken for up and coming mad scientists/Rogues, little do the Batfam know they already went through that phase, Now they research clean energy through ethically sourced ectoplasm, Let Danny Fenton and Tim Drake say fuck 2024. They deserve it, No Batcest | Batfamily Incest (DCU), Author is a night owl so be prepared for late updates., Author is also American so maybe some early updates too, no beta we die like jason todd, Sam Manson Has Plant Powers, She also is a fangirl for Poison Ivy so be afraid, Tucker is probably gonna be butchered so badly. I’m vv sorry, Tucker is a fanboy for Tim Drake tho lol., I don’t know Valerie enough to include her sorry. She’ll get mentioned tho, Mostly as Red Huntress, Platonic Kisses, Platonic Cuddling, The obligatory mention of Tim’s missing spleen, Ecto-Contaminated | Liminal Amity Park Residents (Danny Phantom), being liminal is basically being a meta without the unique powers, None of the Batfam is straight., except Damian. He’s questioning it., Tim and Danny are aged up to be in College, everyone else is aged up as needed to stay somewhat Canon., I’m debating whether Tim and Danny should date or Tim and Tucker should, or if I should just say fuck it and make them poly via https://ift.tt/8Wsf5hH
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Batman: Wayne Family Adventure is a cute little webcomic series that's just meant to be more relaxed and just overall a slice of life.
I feel like an even more interesting thing about it is that in 2021, at some point it even had a 3 Parter live action mini web series of it that was going to be released on Ismahawks' channel on October in that same year.
They even had the cast which goes as follows:
Jonathan Bentley as Bruce Wayne
Lisa Foiles as Barbara Gordon, aka Oracle
Tim Neff as Jason Todd, aka Red Hood
Peter Sudarso as Tim Drake, aka Red Robin
Meghan Camarena as Stephanie Brown aka Spoiler
Gemma Nguyen as Cassandra Cain aka Orphan
Carter Rockwood as Damien Wayne aka Robin
Du-Shaunt ‘Fik-Shun’ Stegall as Duke Thomas aka Signal
and finally Marcus Weiss as Alfred Pennyworth
Pretty killer cast if I say so myself.
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So yeah it honestly seemed like it was already finished and set to go, but there was one problem.
It got cancelled by WB, why? While there's no definite answer there is a theory that this lovely person came up with:
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And yeah like it says, any trace of the teaser is all gone, vid is privated most likely will never released, and neither the show will be. I lowkey even feel bad the for the folks working on the show cause it seems like everything that they were working for was all for naught.
While I get that they should've asked for permission, it's lowkey a bummer that it'll never see the light of the day, especially cause I would've been stoked to see a proper Cassandra Cain in live action (looking at you Birds Of Prey).
For now, the most we can look forward about the Batfamily in live action is the upcoming DCU's Brave And The Bold but even I'm not sure about it cause I feel like it's too soon for a batfamily but hey, like I said in my other post, who knows and I might be impressed.
For now tho, let us just continue Wayne Family Adventures as it is, a free webcomic series. Now I feel like drawing Cass ngl.
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transgender-bruce-wayne · 2 years ago
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Any trans!Bruce headcanons but with the Batfam??
always
i feel like he would honestly just forget to tell the batfam. he's too caught up in training them up so they don't end up dying when fighting and in the justice league and the countless mysterious, etc etc
but then he might say or do something offhand, like automatically know what kind of pads to get steph or cass or mention something about testosterone—a bunch of little things that will add up over time until most of the family has figured it out for themselves.
i think the only person who bruce would tell would be jason. i think i just feel that way because jason's the golden child LMAO maybe bruce cant administer his t-shot one time and alfred is taking a much needed vacation and jason does it for him or something.
it's not until years after damian has taken the mantel of robin that he realizes, "oh shit i totally forgot to tell them about that" but by then he can tell that everyone already knows, so theres really no point to it. he does apologize to dick especially for omitting that bit about himself even after dick being around for the longest (except for alfred who, of course, already knew) (not a straight out apology tho, he's still batman of course. he apologizes in his own kinda stiff and awkward way).
he also realizes that the justice league doesnt know but he decides that thats not his problem
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batmanshole · 1 year ago
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batfam and the batcoworkers as animal crossing villagers?
OKOK SORRY THIS IS LATE @frutista
ok SO im gonna list species + personality type :-)
BRUCE: okay so there's technically already a cranky villager named bruce. but hear me out! he'd be a cranky wolf. obviously. (cause theres no bats) ALSO i think the wolf ears look like the ears on his cowl
BARBARA: i wanna say she'd be a normal cat, deer, or sheep!! she's super cute and i think it just fits her :-) i think sheep fits her the most but theres. already a sheep named baabara UM. ignore that!!!!
DICK: this one was tougher!! but i think he'd be a deer? or a bunny. OMG WAIT NO A DOG. and i think he'd be. well i don't know. not cranky for sure but there's aspects of smug, lazy and jock that i think fit him?? HALP!! how it feels to boil down a complex character who's been around for like 80 years to a simple video game desc. uhhh smug. just cause idk what else to put SORRY!!!
JASON: well i think he'd be a wolf!!!! and i'm leaning towards jock for personality :-) i'd put cranky but well. cranky villagers are implied to be Old. and bruce is already a cranky wolf. could maybe see him as an octopus though because his helmet is very Round. but i don't think that's as good as wolf
CASS: cat. to me. and she'd be big sister / uchi i think??? idont knwo. but she's 100% a cat. a black cat, like kiki but scarier.
TIM: he's lazy for sure. lazy villager. i think he'd be a bird. cause he won't fucking let go of robin. i'd make his colours based on the red robin costume tho.
STEPH: PEPPY FOR SURRREE!!! i could see her as a bunny or an octopus. she might also make a good wolf. but it'd be fun to see her as an octopus i think.
DUKE: squirrel vibes. idk why!! squirrel, cat or dog. and he'd be uhh oh god. either lazy or jock i have no idea. but cranky and smug don't rlly fit him? the male personality types are hard to assign.
DAMIAN: HES FROG!!!!!! his ass is a fucking FROG! and i think he'd be uhh. smug? idk the other things don't really fit him.
ALFRED: this one is tough but i'd go with cranky cause they're implied to be old. he'd be an ostrich or a goat or something.
KATE: either big sister or snooty. probably big sister. she's a wolf like bruce cause theyre cousins !!
BETTE: peppy, 100%. she'd make a good cow or duck!! maybe maybe a bird.
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