#CN fatphobia

[scentedluminarysoul]

"Why do you never do anything with your hair or wear nice clothes?"

Because i have always been fat. And whenever I did try to make my hair look nice, wear makeup, wear nice clothes, people ridiculed me for it. Mocked me. Tore me apart. Asked me if I thought that would do anything to make me more appealing.

People, btw, included my mother.

So then I stopped trying. Because what's the the point, right? But then people asked me why I didn't even try to make an effort.

You can't win as a fat person.

[grinalbi]

I took a sociology class for my last semester of college and the textbook we used actually had a small section that explicitly pointed out how fatness is "the final/last socially acceptable prejudice," which is perfectly accurate in how people on all sides of the political spectrum talk about fatness and the fat people that live it.

I've seen the use of the "crazy sjw feminist" stereotype from gamergate days die down a little but one thing that remains ever present is the way fat activists are treated. Anything they say is dismissed and ridiculed, they have insults hurled at them with so much cruelty and disdain. The moment a fat person asks any group of people to change their worldview on fatness, it's immediate insults and brick walls. This includes left leaning people. Everyone loves to gang up on fat people, it hasn't changed a bit.

[wormworker]

( CN: disordered eating, fatphobia, etc )

"If you want to lose weight, just don't eat." "If you can't afford food today, just don't eat." etc etc

I can't do that lol

Maybe some people can actually go a day or two without eating. I can't. I do not just get hungry. I get really fucking sick. And a hospital bill is a lot more expensive than a fucking meal.

[intersectional-history-medicine]

Something happened today

(cn: fatphobia, transphobia)

today i was in therapy on Zoom for my unresolved trauma when the doctor suggested that I could benefit from losing some weight because “she could see the Quarantine 15″

this was so triggering and traumatic for me . . . how could a pro intersectionality therapist not realize that weight loss surgery is part of patriarchy that oppresses womxn!!! 

This is why feminists need to become doctors science can still be used to subjugate people under the guise of “objectivity” and “health”

[spoonie-living]

[Image: Illustration of a fat, femme with light skin, blue hair, blue wings, and a big smile, leaning over and posing with a finger up as if to instruct. She is wearing a purpleT-shirt with lace-edged sleeves that reads “FLY,” a purple pleated skirt with lace edging, and sensible tennis shoes, and is holding what looks like a fishing rod.]

[ETA: Several kind folks have told us that this person can be very controlling, a little spammy, fatphobic, and possibly anti-feminist. She also is Christian and sometimes includes bible quotes, which some folks may choose to avoid. Those initial comments can be found here. Keeping the post up for now so the warnings and resource are available for those who would like to use it with caution, but open to hearing from readers about the severity of these issues and how this should be handled!]

This sounds like a really kind and encouraging personality with an approach that is perfect for spoonies! There is an app, a newsletter, and many more resources on the FlyLady website, all for free.

The regular encouragement and advice, which seems to lean towards the femme side, looks something like this:

Monthly: a habit (i.e., menu planning)

Weekly: a pamper mission (i.e., moisturizing your skin), and an area to focus on in your home (5-week cycle; missing something is fine since it will come back around).

Daily: a focus mission (i.e., do something you’ve been putting off)

Seasonal: daily holiday prep videos to encourage small steps

Click through for Kathryn’s detailed review!

[scentedluminarysoul]

I also struggle to remember to eat. I sometimes eat only a single small meal all day, if at all, and only when my stomach and head start hurting (all thanks to ADHD). I also can't eat all much at once, I feel full after a few bites

I'm also very fat, and always have been.

Some bodies just are built that way.

I once lost a lot of weight by starving myself, and put on even more after that, because it fucked up my metabolism and likely organs, so I can confirm that as well for what it's worth. Never again

A core feature of anti-fatness is the "you did this to yourself"-view. People are very invested in the idea that size is within everyone's control. It's soothing to believe that all fat people are a small series of good choices away from becoming thin and staying that way, and that thin people are success stories by virtue of existing.

Any time we speak up about discrimination and fatphobia, someone inevitably plays that card. Trolls will say "eat a salad, pig" and well-meaning health nuts will gently explain what calories are. In either case, we're met with a "you know, you can stop this at any time." Why, if nobody was fat, thin people wouldn't need to examine their biases! It sure would be an easier time for everyone if we weren't so Around and Bulliable!

[ladyshinga]

oh thank god,  i've actually been in the market for a giant seatbelt that does nothing

[scentedluminarysoul]

The way people just defend fatphobia without understanding a single thing

THE FAT IS PART OF HER BODY. IT IS HER BODY.

The fruit literally makes her skinny, which was my original point.

Things can slide off of fat bodies.

And YES, it VERY MUCH was about being pretty, because everyone fucking thirsted after her as soon as she became skinny. It also made her freckles disappear and most people fall in love with her because she's so pretty now. You have to deliberately ignore that.

Alvida is fatphobia through and through. It is a deliberate choice to portray it that way. Thanks for proving my point.

Now fuck off and shut your fucking mouth.

[meeresbande]

Wake Up, Freak Out - then Get a Grip

A short animated film about the feedback loops likely to lead to catastrophic climate change, by Leo Murray.

The script, with extensive peer-reviewed references and additional information and links, is available at wakeupfreakout.org/ along with links to translations in more than twenty foreign languages. Some of these are also available in the Subs and Dubs album.

There is also a multilingual DVD available thanks to cinerebelde.org

source: https://vimeo.com/1709110?fbclid=IwAR3mwl1xNu77BMSJ68mrRGUse3znnmArAZT-lsrUvK2AFaoc5l1SSTHnRj0

[scentedluminarysoul]

"It's okay to be fat if you're healthy" is just ableism added onto the fatphobia

[mbelyakova]

after being pleasantly surprised by the david ward mental wellness wednesday post on my feed (thx @mrswhymrhow), i just have to say something about “i am in eskew.”

i only recently got into it. i finished it and am re-listening for the innumerable details i’m sure i’ve missed the first time. i haven’t posted about it before.

(cn: fatphobia mention)

that episode that starts with the psychiatrist is my absolute favorite, because it really helped me deal with the onslaught of fatphobic advertisements as the diet industrial complex engages in a post-quarantine feeding frenzy. i’ve listened to that one over and over.

the episode has nothing to do with fatphobia, but (not enough context for spoilers) what happens to david regarding the railway bridge is really exactly what those ads feel like to me. the fatphobic ads are inescapable, they’re abusive, they use deeply personal manipulation tactics, they induce shame and panic, and they physically harm people. if you buy what they’re selling, their products and regimens will fry your metabolism to hell, even if they appear to temporarily “work.”

i know the invocation of ad tactics in the episode is intentional, but it’s the utter bluntness of the metaphor that got to me. i no longer have a visceral reaction every time i see one of those stupid fatphobic ads. my brain translates all the garbage into a single, repeated word: an absurd directive that i can comfortably ignore.

[pearwaldorf]

Me talking shit about GO fandom

(cn: fatphobia, body image, discussion of body size)

As much as I’m cheered by the fact that the fandom seems to be super into  chubby Aziraphale it’s real fucking weird to me because MSheen isn’t actually fat? Sure he looks like that next to Tennant, but everybody looks fat next to Tennant because he was assigned beanpole at birth. (I read a fic where the ice cream seller in St. James Park called them “Fussy” and “Pipe Cleaner” and I laughed real hard.)

You can do a hell of a lot with fabric to make somebody look skinnier or fatter than they actually are. That’s the whole fucking point of tailoring! I swear I reblogged that post about how the costume department uses drape and design to make Aziraphale look rounder than MSheen actually is, but I couldn’t find it. 

And I get that we are a little bit primed by Gabriel to perceive Aziraphale as “soft”, with all attendant connotations, but 1. fuck Gabriel 2. I’m not sure how much we’re meant to take his (woefully uninformed) opinion as something a viewer should consider. 

It also does not escape me this is happening to a character portrayed by a cis white man. I sincerely doubt we’d be getting anywhere near as much acceptance or celebration if the character looked like, say, Gabourey Sidibe or Jorge Garcia.

I’m super glad people are drawing Aziraphale as chubby/fat in fanart, and treating that particular characteristic as attractive or at least not off-putting. The thing that annoys me is the way I see it characterized (usually in fic) where he’s ashamed of his body for whatever reason and Crowley is the one who tells him there’s nothing wrong with him and in fact loves him for it. 

I mean, there isn’t anything wrong, but it’s so fucking irritating to see a person, fat or not, only get that sort of validation from a signficant other/somebody else as opposed to themselves. I have never once seen a fic where Aziraphale is comfortable or at least neutral about his body image when it’s brought up. And I don’t know if that’s the authors’ issues working their way into the story, but it seems like something worth noting. 

idk. Somebody’s probably already said it way better than I have, but it doesn’t do anybody a service when people are like “Hey this character/actor is chubby/fat and it’s great” when in canon they’re actually... not. 

[kawuli]

cn: bodies, weight, feelings, ugh

So my doctor’s appointment went fine. 

Partly, I think, because for once medical fatphobia worked in my favor. I have gained 15% of my body weight since last July, which made the nurse who weighed me literally go “wait is that right?”

So. On the one hand, I’m not crazy, I actually have gained a bunch of weight. On the other hand... I have gained a bunch of weight, ugh.

The doctor looked at that, listened to my explanation about “I’m tired all the time and my blood sugar is fucked up,” and ordered a handful of blood tests to check for thyroid problems, diabetes, and (lol, happy birthday?) pre-menopause. 

So. hopefully I will have more information soon. 

[scentedluminarysoul]

Probably depends on where one lives. Here, people won't tell you outright "you're fat", but they will still let you know. They will tell you about all their friends and colleagues who lost weight, they will tell you about diets, they will ask you if you really want to eat that.

After losing weight? Yeah, they'll tell you "you look so much better now" and how ugly you were before.

Can people just STOP commenting other people's bodies, period?

[dearbookshelves]

👑Dumplin’👑 . “All my life I’ve had a body worth commenting on and if living in my skin has taught me anything it’s that if it’s not your body, it’s not yours to comment on.” . Willowdean is fat and she’s fine with it. When she finds out her crush likes her back, rather than feeling confident, she starts to doubt herself. In order to regain some confidence and maybe make a point to her former beauty queen mother, she decides to enter the Miss Clover City beauty pageant. . I was really unsure about this book, especially in the beginning. I found myself preferring the film in part because the plot is lacking and also because Willowdean is a bit judgemental of others. The more I thought about the story, the more I was okay with her being a bit unlikable in the beginning. I don’t need to totally love main characters and I think she learns too as the story continues. One of the major takeaways from the story is that people deserve to exist just the way they are. Whether they’re fat or have imperfect teeth or whatever, they don’t have to want to change. I think people expect people with physical imperfections to WANT to change them but sometimes they don’t And that’s okay. . Speaking specifically about the fat rep, I thought this was pretty good. There’s a balance between insecurity (mostly caused by her mother) and knowing that she doesn’t have to and doesn’t want to change. I really related to a lot of what Willowdean was feeling especially when she felt insecure about being touched. It’s like you become hyper-aware of what your body must feel like compared to what the beauty standard must feel like. While I think the plot was a bit slow, I’ll likely pick up the sequel from my library eventually because there are things I enjoyed about this story including, but not limited to, the Dolly Parton references. I was reminded of how good “Why’d You Come In Here Looking Like That?” is. Can’t stop listening to it. . Trigger warnings from BookTriggerWarnings(dot)com: Body shaming Death (relative, past) Fatphobia Grief https://www.instagram.com/p/CN-eDFXLcvD/?igshid=19ftgm9zjhdup

[thisisthinprivilege]

Fatphobia in the Office

CN: diet talk, abusive talk Thin privilege is ......... not being triggered every day at work. I work in an office and the two women who sit near me say things that trigger me every day. They talk every day about their diets. Every time there's morning tea (which is nearly every day) they discuss how much cake they can eat without getting fat. One of them is going on a beach holiday and she talked about wanting to lose weight so she doesn't look like a beached whale. Another time, they talked about who made the floor vibrate, just after I had walked past. This morning, one of them was talking to a colleague about her train commute into work this morning, and she talked about the "stupid fat woman" "jiggling" and bumping into her. I'm so triggered now that my hands are shaking and I want to cry, but I have to keep working and pretend my emotions don't exist. They are nice to my face, but it's easy to imagine what these women must really think of me. I might have been friends with them if they were not so bigoted and blind. But fatphobic conditioning has cut people like me off from people like them. I'm surrounded by people, but I feel lonely and hurt every day.