#But honestly it’s the best comparison I’ve got

[redlionknc]

My enjoyment of Parkour Civilization is unironic. I think it’s dubious to call it “kidslop” due to its overt messaging on capitalism and the class system. Is it a silly Minecraft series? Yes. Is it made for children? Yes. But if someone recreated Van Gogh’s Starry Night using finger paints, would you turn up your nose because finger painting is often considered a kid’s art form?

[boisei]

i have got to do something about my inferiority complex. it honestly just feels like i am never good enough and am always an afterthought. idk whatever fuck this fuck life fuck it all

[loveinhawkins]

“Still super jealous as hell by the way,” Eddie says; Steve laughs, elbows him in the chest—disguising a want to touch by shoving him away.

There’s a brief flash of warmth against his skin before Eddie teeters back.

He stays close though, dances in and out of Steve’s space as they walk, almost close enough to…

“D’you know what’s adding an extra layer of, uh…” Eddie clicks his fingers then says with relish, “Of batshit insanity to everything?”

“No,” Steve says, and he feels a smile growing; he couldn’t fight it even if he tried. He doesn’t want to. “But I’m sure you’re gonna tell me.”

“My, uh. One of my favourite games as a kid was… uh well, it didn’t really have a name, it was more—”

“No jump rope for you?” Steve asks in mock surprise.

Eddie snorts. “Nah, nothing as normal as that, Harrington, honestly. Kid me was a visionary.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” Steve says.

The words hover in the space between teasing and genuine; he means both, of course.

“At, um. When I was at my dad’s.”

Eddie’s smile flickers, and Steve tries to fill in the gaps: has vague memories of middle school halfway through one year, of murmured interest, you seen the new kid? He just moved here.

“Our place backed onto some woods, and I’d just… kinda wander.”

Eddie scoffs—his foot makes an aborted motion as he walks, like he’d gone to absentmindedly kick a twig and thought better of it.

Better safe than sorry, Steve thinks. Hive mind and all that.

“So your favourite game was wandering?” he prompts when Eddie goes quiet.

A tease again. Softer. Really means you can tell me. I want to know.

He wonders if Eddie can hear it.

“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds shit. And it was more, like, active up in…” Eddie taps his temple. “I’d just… uh. Pretend the woods were haunted, stuff like that.”

“Oh,” Steve says, amusement growing. “So all this,” he gestures to the vines and trees, to the fog creeping along the forest floor, “is real immersive for you, then. Got it.”

“Um, no,” Eddie says, and his voice is going up into that wobbly tone that only comes from suppressing genuine, ugly laughter. “The stuff in my head was gothic, Harrington. It had class.”

“God, man, I’m sorry. Is the alternate dimension not living up to your expectations?”

“I’m gonna make a complaint.”

“Yeah, do it in writing. Make it professional.”

“To whom it may concern,” Eddie starts, all comically snooty.

Steve laughs.

And Eddie’s up close again, grinning, and Steve presses the side of his forearm up against his chest; the moment lingers, until Eddie moves back, until Steve drops his arm a fraction too late.

“I’ve found the experience provided—”

Steve snorts. “Experience?”

“—thoroughly lacking in both atmosphere and charm. I expect appropriate compensation as soon as possible.”

“Tell you what,” Steve says, “show me a picture of your haunted woods when we’re outta here. I wanna see how they compare.”

“Um,” Eddie says through the tail end of a chuckle. He sounds embarrassed. “I don’t have… My dad, uh, he wasn’t exactly the kinda guy to take a lot of pictures, y’know?”

And Steve doesn’t know—or at least, he thinks he doesn’t.

What he does know is that in the back of a cabinet there’s an old baby book: he can tell exactly when his grandma first began to get sick—and when everything else went to shit—because the milestone entries stop a third of the way through.

He doesn’t mention it. He can’t find the words, not here, not now—even if he could, he’s worried it’d sound a clumsy, weak comparison at best, self-centred at worst.

So he waits. Feels when the abrupt silence becomes less heavy.

“Did you, like, do speeches to yourself in the game, too?”

Eddie gives him a sideways, bemused look. “Maybe.”

Steve pretends to mull it over. Nods. “Yeah, figures.”

A pause.

“Uh, hold on,” Eddie says, chuckling again, like he’s been surprised into it. “You can’t just leave it there, man, you—”

“Nah, it’s just.” Steve smothers a grin. “Just fits you, that’s all. Like, you would’ve dramatically narrated your own birth if you could, I know it.”

Eddie laughs hard; he nearly drops his flashlight.

“You’re funny,” he says eventually, still smiling.

“Oh, sorry,” Steve quips back, “was I not supposed to be? Ruined your doctrine again?”

“No, just—” Eddie laughs again. Sighs. “Just timing, man. Wish I was finding out in a more, uh, low stakes kinda way. Like…”

His eyes go a little far-off, and for a second Steve can see that kid in him, the one who kept himself company in his own imagination.

“Like we’re just walking past the lockers, or something.”

“Yeah,” Steve says, with probably more feeling than it strictly calls for. “Anything beats these goddamn vines.”

He could add that there is no ideal timing, really: that if there’s one thing he’s learned throughout all this, it’s that there’s hardly ever time to dwell on things. It’s more do or die.

Besides, he thinks, you could wait all your life for a perfect moment, and it still passes you—

The earth trembles.

Eddie sways; Steve lunges to the side so Eddie falls backwards, away from a nearby vine. He tries to plant his feet, realises he’s inevitably going down, too, and course corrects.

Falls.

Feels the rise and fall of Eddie’s chest against his hand.

“M’definitely filing that complaint,” Eddie says breathlessly.

He turns so he’s facing Steve. Stays close.

They’ve both dropped their flashlights. The effect is dazzling—Eddie’s face is illuminated, eyes bright.

No atmosphere, my ass, Steve thinks.

“You okay?” he murmurs.

“Y-yeah,” Eddie says—gasps, really. Steve feels how his breathing shakes.

There’s barely a disguise now; they’re both leaning in.

And for a moment, they’re not here at all; they’re just at school, hiding by the lockers.

Then again…

Maybe it could only happen here.

Maybe wandering—maybe everything—has been leading up to this: the moment before a chance taken.

[chaos0pikachu]

4 Minutes and the Cinematography of Nipples

I said before that I thought 4 Minutes was pretty instantaneously the best looking BL on the market for 2024 after one episode. Which, not gonna lie, is a pretty big fucking claim. There’s been a lot of BL that’s come out that’s looked good, and I do think there’s been a steady improvement overall in the market in the last few years. Personally I think Japanese and Korean BL have a stronger production quality over a majority of Thai BL but like, if that’s a hot take I guess I prefer my food spicy. 

The point being~ if I’m gonna make such a hyperbolic statement, well I better back it up right? 

So I’m gonna break down a few scenes from the first episode, what I liked about them, why they worked for me, and why on a technical level I think 4 Minutes has just got it going on.

For better readability you can also check out this essay here.

Sidenote: my google docs kept trying to autocorrect “Bible” to “the Bible” and idk how to teach google I mean the hot Thai actor and not the book of Jesus. 

To start, I’m going to break down this scene featuring Great and his nepo baby cat: 

I thought starting with this scene would be good because it’s such a low-key scene and honestly making these simplistic scenes visually interesting is very difficult! But if you have the basics down, the foundations of cinematography and film making, these simpler scenes can be really memorable. 

Like yeah we’re all gonna remember this scene because shirtless Bible and oh my god Akira!? - I have only recently learned who Akira is; why is this cat getting a bigger bag than me? - but beyond that, what makes it cool to watch? What makes it interesting? What information does it showcase to the audience? 

One thing I added to the video was a grid for the rule of thirds. 

Rule of thirds is a shot composition technique applied to both film and photography. It’s the grid you see if you film a homevideo and helps a Director and Cinematographer figure out where to place the subject or subjects of the shot. The idea is the gridlines show you where you “should” place the subject(s) of said shot. 

Like everything, the rule of thirds is a guideline in filmmaking, not a hard and fast unbreakable rule. Filmmakers like Wes Anderson like to play more with central composition shots, rather than ROT. 

Anyway on to the opening shot, right after our credits and we’re moving into the shot. 

To start, the first thing I notice is the scene’s color grading. Color grading in film is the manipulation of raw film footage to create specific color tones throughout a project. Sometimes this grading is more pointed and obvious, think The Matrix, while in other films it’s not as obvious but still very prominent, think Killers of the Flower Moon. 

It’s not that the before credits scene looks entirely, jarringly different from the opening scene, but the hospital scene is surrounded by whites and blue tones, it’s darker, and only a single source of light exists. It gives the entire scene a much more frantic, uneasy aesthetic but it’s not so far off from the darker muted tones of the next scene that it feels jarring or out of place. 

The second big thing I noticed in the episode is the use of aspect ratio. I’m not 100% sure what aspect ratio the production used exactly, but the use of widescreen as opposed to full screen in my opinion, gives the episode a more cinematic feel to it in comparison to other Thai BLs. 

Example, if you look at Century of Love (2024) it appears to be filmed in the standard full screen - which I believe is 16:9? - while 4 Minutes is widescreen (thus the black bars at the top and bottom). Widescreen can give a show a more “movie like” quality to it which is part of the vibes I get from 4 Minutes. 

(source)

Onto Great’s actual introduction scene.

We’re not starting the shot with static movement, but with a camera panning right. I’ve talked about camera panning and such in BL before and it’s something I’ve found doesn’t happen as often as it should. Which is a shame! It’s such a simple technique but it adds so much. 

Imagine if we entered the frame with a static center shot, and then a cut to Great sleeping and turning off his alarm clock, and then another cut to above the bed. Think about how much more boring that could be visually. 

Instead, we enter the scene with movement, panning over and creating some interesting visual framing. 

So here’s our opening shot, do you notice anything interesting? To start, what I like about this shot other than the panning movement in, is that we don’t see Great’s face yet. In fact we don’t see his face in full until about 30 seconds into the scene. This builds anticipation, yeah we all know what Bible looks like, but for the audience who doesn’t this helps build anticipation. 

Who is this character? What does he look like? What’s his deal? 

It also engages the audience more, if you notice part of the composition of the shot has Great in the mid-ground slightly blurred out, while the foreground emphasizes the things on his desk. He’s distant from us, the audience, sleeping off his hangover not yet ready to “join” the world yet. 

Here’s another two more things I like about this shot:

Lines. 

Using lines and shapes can make a scene more visually interesting and invoke different feelings to the viewer. In this shot, I get a sense of symmetry, the camera panning right, lightly drags across the screen alongside the lines below and above Great, almost creating a frame within a frame effect. As if Great is boxed into a clock in and of itself. 

You can also see the use of balance in the scene as well, connecting back to that visual theme of symmetry as well as blocking our view of Great’s face. The lava lamb and champagne bottle are almost the same height, which helps create balance in the shot. The champagne bottle informs us Great has been drinking or does drink since it’s positioned so close to his bed, whilst also continuing to hide his face away from the viewer. 

I also like that the lava lamp is a bright spot of color. The tone of the scene is mostly muted greens, and gray, but the bright orange lava lamp and even the pink champagne bottle draw our attention but don’t overwhelm us either. It provides the scene with some warmth but doesn’t offset the overall tone of the color grading. 

And then, the last bit of this shot:

We have Great knocking over the champagne bottom, and turning off his alarm clock. Notice that the alarm clock and the champagne bottle hit those ROT dots almost exactly. There’s also the use of lines by the length of Great’s arm - I just forgot to add a line I’m a failure, a fake, fml - we see him knock over the bottle, and then we follow the line of his arm directly to the alarm clock which is also a shape, a circle. 

I like that they used a clock with a specific notable shape, since by the end of this scene the clock is relevant to the story as a whole. Using a shape makes the clock more visually noticeable and memorable to the audience. 

So in the next cut we’re above Great - just like Great’s gonna be above Tyme, fuckin hell I’m corny - in a medium-full shot and there’s a couple things I really like here. 

I really like the use of lines here with the bed going in one direction but Great’s body going another. It’s disconcerting, and off kilter a bit. 

The use of patterns plus the opposing symmetry, whereas in the previous shot the lava lamp and champagne bottle were providing balance, here one side of the bed is patterned, while the other isn’t. This creates a sense of imbalance and makes the shot more visually interesting.

This medium-full shot at a high angle makes Great smaller, and continues to showcase his dishevelment, keeping him distant from the world itself. Also notice the lack of color here as well. 

What could this say about Great as a character? Or his story? 

So this next cut is the one that actually inspired me to write this essay to begin with and know what I’ma eat some crow here. I originally said it was a great ROT shot but I was wrooooooong. It’s definitely a center composition shot. 

Notice as well, the bed itself is its own shape - rectangle - center in the frame, and yet the shot almost looks unbalanced again because of that singular patterned rug. It’s the only pattern in the entire shot, not even Great’s pillows have noticeable patterns on them. 

The above view camera angle in a full shot creates almost an omnipresent feel, as if the audience - or something else? - were looking down upon Great. Whose face we still haven’t seen! It makes him smaller, less powerful, and almost vulnerable. Shots like this are often used in horror films like James Wan’s Malignant (2021) where the horror spector will be looking down above the would-be victim. 

Another thing I like about this scene though is we have Great moving. It would be simpler and easier to have his phone just by his alarm clock, or under his pillow, but think about how much more visually interesting it is that he has to move down the bed and reach for his phone. It creates action in an actionless low stakes scene. 

And now, 30 whole seconds in and we’ve finally seen Great’s face! 

Fun fact, with the ROT grid the gridlines fall right across Bible’s nipples. That’s not a film analysis, just something I noticed entirely intentionally. Thanks Madam Director Ning Bhanbhassa Dhubthien.

The actual shot is in center composition again, as Great rolls over and reveals his face the camera begins to zoom in. 

This creates movement in the scene instead of leaving the camera to statically observe it’s now, finally, inviting the audience to meet Great. Pulling us in towards him whereas before we were kept at a distance. Great’s awake and, well as ready to meet the world as somebody with a raging hangover can be. 

I also like how Bible is moving constantly in this scene; he rubs his eyes and nose, he twitches his fingers, titles his head back and forth, etc it’s nothing revolutionary but it’s appreciated. 

When the scene cuts, we get this shot: 

I didn’t put the red dot on his nipple, it just landed there. This is all Madam Director Ning chepie. 

But you can see how Great’s body is landing on all those gridlines pretty solidly. Also in the background we see his alarm clock again, a bright blurred circle in the distance. I also like the angle of this shot, as it creates depth in the frame, with Great’s head being in the foreground his lower body in the mid-ground and the background blurred out. 

What follows is Akira appearing in frame. Which was really difficult to capture so I don’t have a screenshot. But what I really like is Akira entering the frame out of focus. They could have just cut to Akira, but instead they opted for Akira to enter the frame which is more interesting. 

When we do cut, Akira is firmly on one of those dots so we don’t miss them in the frame. I think it’s also interesting that we’ve pulled out again, into a mid-full shot, hanging above Great, and we see that clear symmetry line again between the patterned rug and the regular carpet. 

I also really love that when we got to Great sweet-talking Akira and feeding them we’re not just doing a cut, we’re panning downwards which continues to add movement to the scene. And we get that moneyed sponsor shot! 

Durex can’t pay for everything okay?

So in the final bit of this scene we get focus on Great, who’s in focus, before he gets up and leaves the frame where the camera then focuses on the clock behind him. 

See how in the first frame the background is all blurred out, but once Great walks out of the frame - again, great that he walks out, movement!! Y’all don’t understand how boring 1000 Stars was for me to watch because of the lack of this stuff okay? - and then the focus shifts to the clock. Which is round. 

God I know that sounds so dumb, but imagine the clock without that ring light bit on it, it’s just a tiny little rectangle. Not as fun or interesting to look at right? Or as noticeable especially from a distance? 

This shift in focus also tells us “this is important” whatever “this” is. The subject of the shot goes from Great to the alarm clock but they are positioned as equally important. We’re meant to pay attention to this seemingly innocuous item, which we learn later in the episode is time. We’re meant to remember and note that time will be important to the story - I know with a title like 4 Minutes you’d fucking hope time would be important but have y’all ever read Youtube comments? It’s rough out there for visual comprehension okay? 

So all in all this scene is only 1 minute and 40 seconds give or take. It’s very short, but I don’t think it was boring at all. I think it’s a really solid introduction to a main character. Think, Korn didn’t get this much time to showcase his introduction, his scene is shorter - though also well done - which showcases which character is more of a story priority. 

This scene eases the audience into the story, inviting us to wake up into the world like Great is. It uses techniques like lines, shapes, symmetry, color and focus to make what could be a very boring scene into an interesting one. 

There’s so so much I probably and certainly missed, I’m far from an expert, but I hope I was able to articulate what I liked about this scene, and why I think it looks good. 

Stay tuned for more if I can manage to focus long enough to breakdown more scenes lol

Also red dots on Bible’s nipples are just funny to me it be what it be. 

Further Reading: 

Composition in Cinematography / THE LAST OF US

Center-Framing vs Chaos-Cinema: Mad Max vs Transformers

Camera Framing: Shot Composition & Cinematography Techniques Explained [The Shot List, Ep 2]

The Ultimate Guide to Camera Shots (50+ Types of Shots and Angles in Film)

Color Grading 101 - Everything You Need to Know

Mixing Film And Digital Footage: Killers Of The Flower Moon

In Praise of Subtle Cinematography

[beenbaanbuun]

Hi hi! I hope life is treating you well and you’re drinking lots of water and resting well!

I would love to hear your thoughts on dragon!San the brainrot for him has been real lately 😭💖

so this actually changed the chemical infrastructure of my brain and i couldn’t decide how to write it so i hope this is okay 😭😭

——————————————————————————

so ask anyone who i speak to on a regular basis and this is all i’ve been able to talk about for days because i have so many ideas for it

arguably too many for me to even begin to think about structuring them in a way that makes sense…

but hey, we can try right?

so initially my first thought was ‘omg, i’m going to make this little guy so sad…’ and i will! but i promise it will make sense

so san is a people person—or dragon, i guess—right? sure, he’s a little shy but at the end of the day, you can tell he loves being around people

all throughout his childhood he wanted nothing more than to work with kids, maybe be a teacher or something! he’s good at helping people, right?

it just sucks for the poor guy that as he got older, he started to get bigger, his nails started to grow into something akin to talons, and his canine teeth became sharp and menacing

there’s a reason you never really see any dragon-hybrid teachers…

the day san got kicked off of his teacher-training course was probably the saddest day of his life, but at least he had you at home! the most precious jewel in all of his hoard…

honestly, san would love nothing more than to keep you bundled up in his den, wrapped in all six of his limbs—are wings limbs?—to keep you protected from the outside world

realistically, though, he’s all too aware of a humans needs to keep you indoors

you’re like a houseplant with the way you need sun to survive

he also knows that you need to work, since it’s borderline impossible for him to get a job

he’s too scary to work with people, too drawn to shiny things to work with money and too underqualified to work a 9-5

he always feels guilty that you’re the main breadwinner for the household, but he doesn’t mind being a house-husband all that much

he’s more than content taking care of his hoard, after all, and since you are his most prized possession…

speaking of his hoard, it’s kind of littered about the apartment, although most of it is in your bedroom

necklaces and jewels hang from the living room’s light, making it look closer to a chandelier than a regular lampshade

gold and silver appliances are his favourite making the kitchen look somewhat gaudy in comparison to what it originally looked like

as for your bedroom, it looks rather similar to howl’s…

in fact san was almost giddy when you first showed him howl’s moving castle, pointing at the screen with a wicked grin on his face

“see! its not just me who likes to decorate like this!”

you don’t have the heart to tell him that howls moving castle is just make believe and no one decorates like him…

but you suppose it’s not so bad; san dusts it from time to time and the things that dangle from the ceiling are perfect for you to zone out and stare at whenever san is rushing around looking for something to clean you up with after fucking you dumb :)

because let’s be real, dragon!san definitely has a huge cock to match the rest of his body

and despite his sweet demeanour outside of the bedroom, he’s an absolute demon inside of it

he’s possessive, more than anything, so if you ever come home smelling of anything other than him, then you best believe you’re being whisked away to the bedroom the second you step food through the front door

hands will be on you before you even know it, talons tearing at clothes and stripping you naked before you even get chance to tell him that this shirt is far too expensive to tear

you don’t even get much chance to protest after he’s torn it from you either because his lips will be on yours and his forked tongue will already be lapping at the inside of your mouth like his life depends on it

everything happens so quick because he’s just so desperate to make sure you know that you’re his again

he needs each one of your senses to be filled by him, he needs your mind to only think of him, he needs your pussy to be dripping with him

he knows he doesn’t own you but he needs to feel like he does

when he’s like this, it’s always quick. he needs to fuck you hard and fast before that strange smell that doesn’t belong to him sinks into your skin and stays there forever!

it’s purely instinct driven, really…

and maybe later he’ll take you for round two, only this time he wants to actually savour you

now you smell like him again, he can relax as he forces his cock inside of you

he can take his time kissing you and making you feel like the most beautiful person alive

he can let his hands trace every inch of your body, appreciating every dip and curve you have

and once it’s over, he can sit there with his cock still plugging you up and appreciate your blissed out face as you recover from what can only be described as a heavenly experience

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

What was up with Chris Thorndyke, anyway?

I think it’s safe to say that Chris Thorndyke is one of the most hated characters in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which is... a bit odd, when you think about it. In a world of Ken Penders’s Daddy Issues Personified and Octopus Who Kills Children For Fun (the latter of which basically being a fandom sexyman), why is a twelve-year-old boy so polarizing?

It would be easy to chalk this up to the bad 4kidz dub, but I don’t quite think that’s it. A lot of the complaints I’ve heard can go to “he got the main character slot in Sonic’s show” or “I just don’t like the human characters,” which are valid, but pale in comparison to basically all I’ve seen being: “He’s just annoying,” “I can’t fucking stand him,” etc. That’s basically all I hear, and when asking why, it usually boils down to two things: 1) his extreme attachment to Sonic and 2) his status as a rich white american only child basically puts any and all of his problems at “first world problems” at best. Those also seem like valid reasons, right?

Thing is, while on the surface it seems like this kid has no issues, as a kid with a, how you say, rough childhood, something stuck with me when I watched the show for the first time. I remember sitting through episode after episode, wondering, When does Chris stop being sympathetic and start being annoying? Since, you know, that’s his reputation.

It didn’t happen.

And it slowly became apparent to me that a lot of the things that made Chris “annoying” and “obsessive”... were just obvious symptoms of a traumatized kid.

Join me for my thesis presentation: Chris’s “annoying” traits are not a writing flaw, but an intentional character flaw brought about by severe neglect, which is resolved through his character arc, and why the fandom reaction to him is so furious.

Note: Throughout this meta, we will only be looking over the Japanese version of Sonic X, as it’s the original script and 4kidz did not translate it accurately. So if you see some lines you don’t remember being said, those are from the English subtitles/direct translation.

Once again, it is possible (also likely, we’ll discuss that a bit) that the kidification and cuts to Sonic X did a number on Chris’s likability, but for most of the meta we’ll be discussing his Japanese characterization with only a few references to cut scenes or lines in the dub.

Part I: First Impressions

On the surface, Chris seems like not just a normal kid, but a very privileged one. He goes to regular school with regular friends, but also goes home to a mansion and millions of dollars. His parents dote on him, his grandfather has fun with him, the two servants treat him like their own kid. He should have no problems, right?

Except, honestly, the issues become apparent in Episode One.

You may be saying here, “What do you mean, episode one? The second episode is when Chris gets all his characterization and exposition.”

Except we get all this visually in the final scene of the episode. (I PROMISE the whole essay won’t be this analytic over small scenes but this is important.)

Before Chris rescues Sonic, kickstarting his part in the plot, we see him hear Sonic fall, peer out the window, and then run out to get him.

Firstly, the shots of his room. His room is huge– and we’ll come back to that detail later, so keep it in mind– but it’s also dark. Which tracks ofc, it’s nighttime and the kid’s asleep, but there’s also a lit desk light, which we see when Chris goes to the window. This together gives the audience the visual impression that Chris is in the dark, with the light only coming when he opens that window and sees Sonic.

Let’s get into the bigness of the house here, as Chris runs out of the room. In every shot we see him running, it’s emphasized how small he is. No, not only how small he is, but how empty the rest of the house is.

First the shot in the hall. There’s minimal lighting from a few wall lamps, the rest of the hallway is incredibly dark. Chris is shorter than the height of the lamps on the wall, his positioning keeps him small in the frame despite him running closer. He’s also centered in the hall, and when you look to the walls you can see several doors, implying several rooms, but only Chris is in the hall.

Then the stairwell– once again incredibly dark, but we see more of the grandiose nature of the house. A painting taller than Chris, a Grandfather Clock maybe twice his height. He also runs down the stairs with the railing up to his shoulder. It’s all finely detailed, which of course reflects the Thorndyke luxury they live in. But it’s still dark, and Chris is still so small.

A shot of him running across the floor. It’s shot from above, and we see that the tiles on the floor are bigger than his whole body. This shot is even darker than the rest, only a few lights reflecting on the ground. The above-shot also shows a ceiling fan in front of us, which makes it look bigger than it is, also dwarfing Chris in the shot.

There’s a shot after that of Chris running to the pool– it is actually near-impossible to see him here, but if you look he runs off the back porch. Once again the world is huge, everything around him is huge, and everything is dark, except the pools. The pools where Sonic is, not that he knows that yet.

The pool still remains brightly lit as Chris dives in and saves Sonic. The first shot we see is him diving in, and then grabbing onto Sonic’s wrist. This is repeated multiple times later in the show as they reach for each other’s hands. It’s not only the first time we see this kid make contact with someone in the show, I’m pretty sure it’s the first time we see Sonic. In the first bit of the episode he’s only hitting robots, in the second bit he’s fleeing from everyone who comes near him. This first contact thus subconsciously establishes itself in the audience’s minds as important for both of them.

We finally see Chris clearly after he pulls Sonic out, where the two of them are lit by the pool’s light. Despite the long shadows coming off of them, they are both fully visible and sitting amongst the lit tiles, meaning Chris is now in the light.

This opening scene also establishes something important about Chris as well, and that’s that he’s... not a rich asshole. This kid woke up in the middle of the night, and for all intents and purposes saw nothing in the pool– he saw the ripples stilling, but that could’ve been anything. Could’ve been a frog. Could’ve been a bird taking off into the air. Could’ve been a bird shitting. But Chris still investigates anyway and immediately dives in, presumably once he sees something still in there. As he dives in, he also reaches for Sonic instantly, meaning it wasn’t just pure curiosity that drove him forward, but a deep desire to help whatever was in there. Likely he saw it moving and leapt in to save it without a second thought.

It’s established in the next episode that Chris knew full well he was not allowed to do this and it probably wouldn’t be safe; he’s not allowed to go outside at night or swim in the adult pool. Not to mention he’s also probably still half-asleep and wearing pajamas. Without hesitation he jumps in anyway because there’s something that needs his help. When he pulls Sonic out, he can clearly see this is a weird fucked-up thing he doesn’t recognize, but without even reacting to that fact he just asks if he’s okay. He only starts showing his surprise when Sonic begins talking. Even then there’s no screaming, he just introduces himself politely and then. Takes Sonic inside.

The next episode opens already in the next morning, and with Sonic still there we can assume Chris just hid him for the rest of the night without telling the other adults in the house. After Sonic mentioned people chasing him, Chris probably figured it wasn’t safe to tell anyone and took it upon his 12yo self to make sure this little guy didn’t get spotted.

Which, if it weren’t for Sonic’s impulsiveness, would’ve been incredibly easy.

The second episode opens with another panning shot of the huge mansion, with a voice overlay from Lindsey. The first thing we hear from Chris’s mother is that she’s sorry, but she won’t come home til “next week.” But she’ll send him a ton of gifts, so it’s okay!

Our next interesting shot is as she continues talking, and we see a ton of family photos tacked onto the wall. This immediately gives the impression of, of course, a family that really loves each other. It then immediately pans to Chris, alone on the balcony, talking minimally into a phone.

Chris then has another character beat of apologizing for diving in the pool. It seems like if he hadn’t mentioned it, nobody would’ve known, but he does anyway because he’s just like. A good little kid. Either that or it’s anything to keep his mom on the line longer.

Another thing to note is that Tanaka briefly enters during this scene, but doesn’t even look at Chris as he drops his food off and leaves.

When she hangs up, we hear a little kissing noise, and then Chris kisses the phone receiver and rubs the back of his head. His expression doesn’t seem embarrassed, though, especially as he didn’t notice Sonic staring at him until the next shot. He looks perhaps relieved, a soft kind of happy, perhaps at the compliment she gave him immediately before her abrupt goodbye.

Sonic then asks why Chris referred to him as a cat; he doesn’t seem upset, just a little curious. Chris’s reaction is interesting here– the first thing he does is ask if Sonic is mad at him, and then immediately launch into an explanation.

After Sonic seems calm, Chris then curiously asks Sonic where he learned to talk. They’re interrupted by the phone ringing, and Chris seems incredibly confused that it rung. He answers almost robotically, and immediately grows excited upon hearing it’s his dad, though his voice still indicates surprise. You can really hear it in the line delivery of his og actress, Sanae Kobayashi.

Chris continues smiling blankly as his Dad talks about how his mom told him that a cat got into the estate and maybe he should update security. Chris swiftly assures him that it’s okay, and then says, “But more importantly, you’re very busy, aren’t you?”

Basically he already knows that this conversation will be less than a minute long, but he’s still smiling until his dad’s already hung up.

The rest of the scene plays out as Chris googles what hedgehogs eat, tries to feed Sonic cat food, and then rightfully freaks out when Sonic leaves to get a chili dog, considering he’s a fugitive. And while his face and mannerisms at the end of the scene does effectively display this worry, they really do hold on that shot for a while as he fades back into a sadder expression.

These scenes both serve as introductory scenes to Chris, and both visually and through dialogue, we have established:

Chris is constantly alone.

His world is dark until he finds Sonic.

He has a kind personality and doesn’t seem to be at all jaded or spoiled by his privileged upbringing.

His parents love him but are so absent that he doesn’t even bat an eye at the fact he won’t see his mom for a week. He is surprised when his Dad calls but immediately puts his work before his own well being.

He’s relatively calm, but only freaks out when he thinks Sonic might be mad at him, and when Sonic leaves.

I’d love to do a fucking scene-for-scene analysis of the entire show, but we’d be here for like twenty years so instead let’s uh. jump ahead a bit.

We slowly unravel Chris’s backstory and mental state throughout the first two seasons, in a slow way that I think is very effective and won’t be effective enough through this essay, but I’m gonna try my best.

Anyway, let’s jump ahead and cover his whole... thing.

Part II: The Backstory Scene that 4kidz Cut

The youngest we ever see Chris is in the season two penultimate episode. There’s a flashback to him as what seems to be a toddler, or just out of toddlerhood. This scene, right here, was cut in the English dub for... no real reason I can think of. In fact, it just makes Chris look less sympathetic.

The first shot we get is of Chris and his parents. Much like the Chris’s first scene, he is tiny, even tinier. But unlike that scene, everything is bright. It’s blinding, actually, as the doors are open and Chris’s parents stand in front of it. This is obviously from baby Chris’s perspective, representing his emotional state. With those doors open and his parents in front of him, he is covered in light. Covered.

His parents are quite formal in their parting words. “We’re leaving now,” his dad says. His mom then says, “I’m sorry, Chris. Make sure you behave until we return.”

Once again, I mentioned that this scene is from baby Chris’s perspective, so maybe they weren’t as formal when this actually happened. But that’s how it came across to Chris.

Sidenote, but honestly? Considering his age, this could very well be one of his earliest memories.

Little Chris says, “If I behave, will you come home right away?” While of course operating on little kid logic, this also reflects on how much he loves his family again, as all he wants is for his parents to be home with him.

His parents look at each other, confused on how to answer. They then give the worst answer– “Of course.” We see how happy this makes him, but it’s only a temporary happiness. They’ve just made a promise they cannot keep and they know it, and at baby Chris’s age, he will NOT understand that.

When they turn to leave, Chris’s face falls. They once again have a formal goodbye, and as they leave, the doors shut, and the light is gone, and he stands there for again a long time. I don’t think I need to explain what this symbolizes.

The next shot, we see Chris is reading a picture book by himself on the couch. Once again a small little guy in a big world; the book also seems to be The Little Matchgirl, which... oof. The story is about how a lonely orphan dreams about having a family as she slowly freezes to death, in case you weren’t aware. The two shots we see from the book are first of her freezing, and then of her looking in a window and imagining a family. As Chris reads this, he repeats that if he behaves, his parents will come home.

He then hears the door about to open and immediately leaps up and smiles widely.

It’s not his parents, it’s Ella, but she has presents from his parents!

Despite being a little kid who would normally be ecstatic at the prospect of new toys, Chris just looks numb as she speaks.

He takes no joy in the toy either, because his parents aren’t there with it.

So. I have worked at a daycare and as a babysitter for about... seven years now. Kids? They have separation anxiety. They will sob and scream and shout and kick and run if their mom is out of their sight. I recently babysat a kid who learned how to unlock the door so he could try and run after his parents which was terrifying for me tbh.

Chris’s reaction of just immediately falling into a numb depression isn’t something I saw in the kids I watched. At this age, they cry at the very least. Chris doesn’t even do that, he’s just staring. We get one voiceover at the end of this scene, as Chris just says, “It never came true.” Obviously referring to the promise– he behaved, and his parents still stayed away.

What impression does this give a kid that age? One of two things, if not both at once:

I am not behaving enough and I need to behave perfectly.

Mom and Dad don’t care enough to come home.

From knowing Lindsey and Nelson, we know this is not true. They’re busy, and they hope to show their love through gifts. But Chris’s love language is very much not gifts, it’s quality time. And he doesn’t. Get that.

From anyone.

Part III: Chris’s Abandonment Issues

As I’ve made it clear, Chris’s parents are never around. He doesn’t bat an eye at his mother saying she’ll be gone another week, and is surprised that his Dad even bothered to call. We saw all those family photos, but looking at them again, how many of them were taken at the same time, one of the few times his parents were home? How many is Chris standing stiffly, properly, instead of relaxing like a kid?

Another line from episode six really drives his home, one I think a lot of people miss.

Upon being told his parents are coming home, Chris remarks that it has been months since he’s seen them. Months.

Later in the episode, Chuck remarks on how it’s a miracle to see them both at the house at the same time. They laugh this off, and spend the rest of the episode anxiously waiting for Chris to get home because, yeah, they do care. When Chris gets home he immediately calls for them and gets tackle-hugged. As they do, he stiffens upon the physical contact, and looks awkward the whole time, like he’s not used to physical affection.

He’s then later surprised to hear his parents were worried he was late.

The next episode, Chris’s dad has already left by the next morning. When he hears his mom has unexpectedly left, he is upset, but not surprised; he immediately resigns himself to this and sighs before leaning back on the couch.

When he brings this up to his uncle, Sam immediately remarks that his sister is never home.

This is where Cream breaks, because she has seen Lindsey herself break down over not being there for Chris. Chris has not seen that. All he knows is that his mother was there and then was gone, despite their elaborate dinner plan, despite knowing he was bringing a guest to meet her.

Once again, he’s not surprised. Neither is Sam.

Similar with his Dad; in the previous episode, when they were worried, Nelson implies that he has a guard service making sure Chris doesn’t get abducted. They’re two seconds away from calling the US Military to find him. But they stop short of going after him, because they don’t want him to think they’re being overbearing.

We’ve firmly established this by now, okay? His parents are never home and haven’t been since he was, what? Three? Four, tops.

Nobody else was really there, either.

Ella and Tanaka seem to have done most of Chris’s raising. And while Ella and Tanaka are amazing, and definitely care a lot about Chris, it doesn’t change the fact that they are paid employees and Chris knows this. They’re paid to hang out with him. If they weren’t getting paid, Chris has no idea if they would even give a shit about him. Even with that, there’s not a ton of evidence they like. hung out with him outside of making sure he was alright. As mentioned, in the second episode Tanaka doesn’t even look at him as he delivers food. Not for lack of care, but probably because they’re busy as only two servants in a huge estate. This isn’t their kid, too, they’re under no obligation to raise him. Ella is the cook and Tanaka is the butler-bodyguard, they’re not childcare experts.

What about his grandpa? Sorry to break this to you but Chuck wasn’t around, either.

In episode 51, which we’re gonna keep coming back to as it’s the culmination of Chris’s arc, Chuck says this while reprimanding Nelson and Lindsey. He says, “I never blamed you for neglecting your household because you were too busy with work. That’s because I also did whatever I wanted and continued my research.”

Back to the second episode, when we first see Chuck, you notice on the second watch that Chris 1) doesn’t trust his grandpa enough to tell him that he’s hiding a fugitive in their house, 2) didn’t seem to expect him (or ANYONE) to walk in on them in the LIVING ROOM, 3) seems to not know a ton about his personality. He’s surprised when his grandpa closes the door on Sonic, and surprised that he’s a bit of an adrenaline junkie. It seems that instead of spending time with his grandson, Chuck spent most of his time in his shed tinkering with machines.

His uncle? Seems to visit on occasion, but has a government job. You know he’s never around, either.

So Chris is growing up in a huge house, which is serving to give him a constant reminder that nobody’s home. There are two servants going around working and sometimes saying hi to him, there’s a grandpa in the shed somewhere who might come in once or twice to watch TV, and there’s photos on the wall of parents who aren’t home. He’s like that for at least eight years.

OH, and let’s talk about the friends argument which I’ve confusingly seen. He’s got two friends at school. His parents seem to recognize Danny’s name, so Danny might have been a longtime friend, or at least friend he talked about before. But Danny and Frances, being barely in any episodes, we can assume they also have their own lives and things going on and thus don’t, like, hang out with Chris after school a lot. He uses Danny as an excuse for being late in ep6, but the fact that nobody seemed to expect him to be late implies this is not a usual thing. And of course it is ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY not on the shoulders of these other 12yos to emotionally support another kid, but it’s not like they’re immediately moving into his house and giving him attention 24/7. They’re friends. Which is all they need to be. But for a neglected child like Chris, they’re just another part of his life that comes and goes. Him having two buddies at school that he shares a table with (thus probably just. friends by proximity) doesn’t negate the neglect.

Looking at the photos on the wall again, there’s one photo of Chris with some kind of sports team, probably baseball. Considering how bad Chris played in the baseball episode, he probably didn’t stay there long, and considering we never see anyone even resembling the kids in that pic, we can assume they didn’t stay long-lasting friends. The other photos, they’re dressed in suits, like they’re taking professional photos. Once again stilted, stiff.

But I hear y’all on twitter now. “Oh, boo-hoo, his parents weren’t around. He was still living fancy, it’s fine.”

So let’s talk about the effects of emotional neglect on the childhood psyche.

Part IV: Connie Read Actual Research Papers and Scholarly Articles For This Instead of Doing Actual Work

So, here’s something that’s been seen recurrently in neglected children: kids are psychologically dependent on parents or caregivers throughout their whole childhood and adolescence.

From New Directions in Child Abuse and Neglect Research by the Committee on Child Maltreatment Research, “Children who have experienced abuse and neglect are therefor at increased risk for a number of problematic developmental, health, and mental health outcomes, including learning problems, problems relating to peers, externalizing symptoms [aggression or conduct disorder], and posttraumatic stress disorder. As adults, these children continue to show increased risk for psychiatric disorders, substance use, serious medical illnesses, and lower economic productivity.”

Let’s talk mainly about the mental health outcomes. Without a present caregiver, neglected children often fall behind on the abilities to regulate behavior or emotions. Several parts of the brain will end up altered due to early childhood neglect, including the stress response system, the emotion processing and regulation system, the learning and memory system, etc.

The stress response system is the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenocortial axis, aka the HPA. The HPA is incredibly sensitive to early childhood experiences and an uncertain childhood can effect a lot of things, such as sleep patterns and hyperactivity. Abused children will often have higher spikes of cortisol, a high enough number of which can cause damage to the brain and premature aging.

The behavioral regulation is also most commonly affected in these victims; neglected children will often show “behavioral and emotional difficulties that are consistent with effects on the amygdala, such as internalizing problems, heightened anxiety, and emotional reactivity, and deficits in emotional processing.”

Other mental health issues are also seen; children with trauma experiences will show similar mental patterns as those with ADHD, and can have serious issues with inhibitory control– aka, controlling your impulses.

Then there’s the corpus callosum. (Insert SnapCube dub joke here.) The corpus callosum manages communication between the two hemispheres of the brain. Several studies have found that abused children have a much smaller corpus callosum than non-abused children, even those who are mentally ill; these effects are also more pronounced in boys than girls, which is relevant to our analysis of a 12yo anime boy from 2003. This means that their brain development will often be behind that of their peers, and it could take a while for them to mature.

That was long and boring Connie. Give us the tldr.

Okay don’t worry, the article got to that right about now. Children dealing with neglect will show several issues related to the interrupted development of these parts of their brain, including:

Extreme Deficits in Executive Functioning

Difficulty in regulating attention: As a note on this, 18.6% of abused and neglected teens are diagnosed with ADHD. Compared to 5% of other children. That’s like three times the amount!

And, most interestingly, the behavioral outcomes:

Difficulty forming trusting attachments to caregivers

Both Disorganized and Insecure Attachment Issues, usually getting severe Attachment Disorders

Reactive Attachment Disorder: Inhibited or emotionally withdrawn behavior, rarely seeking or responding to comfort

Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder: Basically the opposite; it’s marked by a pattern of overly familiar behavior with strangers.

Emotion Regulation: infants learn how to deal with distress via their parents– how their caregivers handle stress, how they take care of problems and slowly introduce the ability to deal with them. Without that, abused and neglected children will often fail to develop effective strategies for regulating emotions. This will probably cause a lot of the following.

This also includes recognizing emotions in others. While abused children will identify anger quickly, neglected children tend to be worse than non-neglected children at identifying any facial expressions.

Their emotional issues can also cause them to feel isolated from their peers, as their peers do not understand them and do not act like them.

Anxiety

Depression– nearly a 3x chance compared to non-neglected kids

Dissociation

Conduct Disorder

PTSD

Physical issues include stunted growth and motor development, and lower health.

Note that these do not appear in all victims of neglect, these are just common symptoms.

Part V: Every “Annoying” Thing Chris Does is a Fucking Symptom

Difficulty forming attachments to Caregivers

In episode 43, Chris deals with a situation that’s obviously alien to him: his parents coming home to care about him.

His parents hear that he’s sick and drop everything to come home. This is clearly something that’s unusual, judging from both Chris’s and his grandpa’s reactions to it. Chris is confused and embarrassed, kinda numb and still, until his grandfather and father start arguing. Even then, he only reacts when they bring up Sonic.

He then yells that he hates his family and orders them to leave him alone. This doesn’t last long as they’re immediately attacked by more badniks, but it’s a beat they definitely put in there intentionally.

Also, he doesn’t seem to trust Chuck as an authority either. He really just sees him as an impulsive adrenaline junkie at best; in the cruise ship episode, Chuck is drunk the whole time and Chris doesn’t seem to care. It also says something that while Ella and Tanaka are present, he doesn’t trust them to tell them they might be finding an alien in the attic until they find out for themselves.

Difficulty Understanding Others’ Emotions

This one’s gonna be easy, as I talked about it earlier in the essay. When Sonic asks, “Was the cat supposed to be me?” Chris immediately assumes he’s upset and tries to placate him with an explanation. This happens throughout the show as well; let’s take Mr. Stewart for example, that man is obviously spying on him and inserting himself into his life and Chris thinks it’s maybe a little weird, not that much though. He also spends most of his time hanging out with Shadow standing there in complete obliviousness as to what Shadow is thinking or feeling. He doesn’t even seem to really register Shadow as a threat, instead throwing himself at him in hopes that he can convince him to help Sonic. In doing so, he also doesn’t think that Tanaka would at all be worried about him, and is surprised at their reunion that Tanaka was upset.

Aggression / Delinquincy

This was very underplayed, but in the Sonic Battle arc, we literally see him start to rebel. He tells Sonic that he’s sick of being the perfect rich kid, that he wants to be a problem on purpose sometimes. Sonic seems to completely understand that, as that’s a point Chris needs to reach. He has to realize he cannot be perfect and that’s okay.

[except that dialogue was all cut in the 4kidz version no im not bitter]

Only Chris explores his imperfection in a really bad way.

And now. Let’s get into the attachment.

And to do that, we need to get into...

Part VI: What Sonic Represents

This is a fascinating part of Chris’s psyche since I think it occurs both subconsciously and consciously, but when I drew attention to Sonic bringing the light back into Chris’s life? Yeah, that’s cause he did.

Everything changed only after Sonic arrived. Suddenly Chris’s parents are... visiting??? For once??? TOGETHER??? His grandfather wants to spend time with him! His friends at school are hanging out with him more and he’s even made new friends! And most importantly, he has the mobians around him constantly. He’s got constant attention from all of them, and while he quickly takes on the figure of the Responsible One, he’s still WITH PEOPLE. He’s gone from being alone all the time to surrounded by a rowdy-ass found family.

Most of all is Sonic. Chris seems to have attached himself mainly to Sonic, likely because in his mind Sonic represents the moment when everything changed. Of course, Sonic would probably have been the worst of the gang to get attached to, seeing as he runs off all the time. The first several episodes, even after they stop hiding from the public, Chris is noticeably upset whenever Sonic leaves. He only calms down after several, several episodes, after assurances from every character that this is just a thing Sonic does, he never sticks around anyway, don’t worry about it.

But still, he definitely attaches himself to this hedgehog for better or for worse.

And it gets worse.

Part VII: Even More Trauma

First we gotta talk about the end of Season One.

At the beginning of the arc, Chris is noticeably... incredibly depressed. He’s also disassociating hardcore. He’s constantly staring into nothing, his face upset, but as soon as someone snaps him back to reality, he forces a smile on his face, acting happy despite going through a ton of negative emotions at once. Almost like he’s trying to behave perfectly.

Chris realizes throughout the episode the attachment he’s gotten to the mobians, and especially Sonic, but even then he still does his best to help them. He steals a chaos emerald and runs off to Eggman in order to get them home, because it will make them happy! Nevermind if it doesn’t make Chris happy. He’s never worried about that anyway.

Of course this backfires and Eggman kidnaps him, and then Chris has to go through the serious trauma of. Well. Being strapped to a wall, forced to watch helplessly as Sonic fucking dies.

And he’s blaming himself for it too.

MAJOR shoutout to Kobayashi’s acting in this scene, holy crap. But he just screams, and then... BREAKS THROUGH METAL?? And GRABS the Chaos Emeralds despite them ELECTRIC SHOCKING HIM???

And then of course we get this incredibly subtle dialogue.

"I will not let you have it. I will not let anyone have it. They’re only mine. Only me. Sonic... Sonic, you’re staying with me forever.”

Immediately after this, Chris almost fucking dies, and is only saved by Super Sonic. When he sees Super Sonic, he reacts by... begging. He drops down, clinging to Sonic and screaming and crying that he is nothing without Sonic.

Chris literally yells that he can’t do anything without Sonic, because that’s how he felt before Sonic. He could not do anything to get anyone to care about him, it only happened when Sonic arrived. So that’s how he sees himself: useless, worthless.

Sonic of course stays, but then dips for six months. When he gets back, a fucking god attacks Chris’s neighborhood, destroying his city. He gets sent away for a month, but that’s interrupted by Sonic being declared a fugitive from the government. Then Chris ends up with Shadow. He gets kidnapped by the goth clone of his emotional support hedgehog. He bonds with the goth clone. He gets the shit beaten out of him begging the goth clone to help save the world. It works, and Shadow runs off to save the planet. And then DIES.

You can tell how traumatized Chris is by this in the next episode. He’s disassociating again, staring at nothing, and eventually asks his uncle if he thinks they can actually live in the same world.

Which is followed by...

Part VIII: The Season Two Finale

We get the rather worrying scene of Chris having to write an essay for his school about his ideal future. Literally all he can think of is that he wants to stay with Sonic forever. He has no other ideals for the future. Just being attached to Sonic.

Only to go downstairs and find out that Sonic HAS to leave. They ALL have to leave. Their dimensions are caving in on themselves and they need to separate.

So he enters the Denial stage of grief.

He seems... dazed. Like he’s in a trance, as he argues that Sonic can’t leave, that all he wants to do is be with Sonic, that he can’t be apart from Sonic because he’s only been able to do things since Sonic got here. This was the first time he’s had agency in his life and he places it all on Sonic.

He decides that it must be Eggman’s fault and literally tracks him down. When he finds out that it’s not Eggman’s fault, he is distraught, and what’s interesting to me is that Eggman seems to get it. He just tells his robots to let him go. Let him be alone. Let him accept it.

Chris then falls back into the depression/disassociation during the entire farewell. He doesn’t emote, he just stares ahead. Something they cut in the English version is that while Chris is politely saying goodbye, throughout the whole scene you can hear his inner monologue screaming. Crying not to let them leave.

So he doesn’t.

The penultimate episode of Season Two is the culmination of Chris’s arc and they do it so beautifully.

Sonic knows Chris is going through a breakdown, and he lets him figure it out for himself. He lets him run off with him, he lets him make the decisions about where they go. Chris starts to realize this but says nothing. They see his tearful parents on TV begging him to come home and he... groans and leaves.

The episode also subtley shows Chris doing things himself. Climbing up the mountain, picking their roads. Sonic is slowly trying to let Chris know he has his own agency. That he is his own person.

They get to the campsite that meant a lot to Chris in his childhood, one of the only times that his parents hung out with him, and he breaks. Asks Sonic why he doesn’t hate him. Why he hangs out with him. If he only hangs out with him out of obligation.

And he comes to the conclusion himself that no, he can’t keep Sonic here. He can’t keep Sonic away from his world just because he has attachment issues. It was what he knew was right in Season One but couldn’t get himself to understand no matter how hard he tried. But now he gets it. And now he can let Sonic go.

The episode is soooo good, sooo fucking good. And then in the season finale, when we see the aftermath of that, when Sonic takes him on one last run and... he sees Sonic crying? Realizes that Sonic does love him and still lets him go? It’s impactful. It’s emotional.

Then when his parents come get him and he just smiles? Because he realizes they did come for him? That if Sonic can love him without obligation, maybe other people do too?

Chris’s severe attachment issues and trauma from being neglected culminated in this episode, and he made a bad choice. And then he made the right one. And that’s so good.

Part IX: Some Season Three Notes

Chris’s inclusion in the third season was... weird. It felt like they didn’t want to animate his adult model so they shoved him into a child body and made an excuse for it. But honestly, after traveling there, you can kinda... tell how much Chris has grown.

He was trying to get back to Sonic, but not because he needed him, but because they were friends. He and his friends wanted to see their friends again. He only went alone because he had a sense Sonic was in danger. And even in the twelve-year-old body, he’s an adult now and he acts like it. His only real emotional issue is that he is upset he can’t fight as well in his kid body, but then he figures out he can be useful with his inventions and finds a place with Tails. He’s basically parenting the rest of them for the rest of the season, telling Cosmo that her impulsiveness reminds him of his younger self. He offers to give up a way to return home because he knows the Metarex problem is bigger than himself.

At the end, when Eggman offers him a way home, you can tell they expected him to freak out about it. They’re shocked when he just says thank you, cries, and leaves immediately. They clearly not only will miss him, but they expected him to freak out like he did at the age of twelve. But he’s not twelve anymore. He’s spent the last six years surrounded by people who love him, healing from his trauma, and becoming his own person. So now he isn’t unhealthily attached to Sonic, and he can say goodbye if he has to. That growth, so subtly in the background of the season, really impressed me.

Part X: Fandom Reaction

On June 24 2022, I posted this meme to both twitter and tumblr.

On tumblr I got no pushback and a few agreements. On twitter I got a tidal wave of discourse, which tells you a lot about the two sites but regardless, this is the first time I get to ratio my commenters cause as of today, it has 23.4k likes and only 161 replies and 156 quote tweets. So that’s barely over 300 people (TOPS, considering several replies were positive) arguing against 23,400. So I may not be the only one thinking this!

But even still, with this being my most viral post atm, I got so many people bitching about Chris still. Even after all these years, he’s despised for being so annoying. And what is it? Is it really the fact that he got main charactered over Sonic? Really, I thought that was a plus of the show, that Sonic was a static figure that influenced what was around him. It doesn’t work for every Sonic property, but it did for this one. Was it just a hatred for humans in the franchise? Probably not, everyone loved Helen and the recent movies.

I really do think a vast majority of it is his realistic reaction to the trauma of neglect. “Ugly” trauma symptoms, like attachment issues, impulsive destructive behavior, aggressiveness, and selfishness, they are not looked upon kindly. Just look at how TikTok picks and chooses cute parts of mental illnesses and calls the rest “toxic.” And yes, sometimes mental illness can cause you to be toxic! And sometimes you’re just mentally ill! Sometimes you just have bad days and bad decisions and horrible mental states, and sometimes, life gets better. Sometimes life gets better and you begin to heal, and that’s what Chris’s arc was about, about him slowly gaining his own agency and starting to heal from his abandonment trauma. And he does this through the help of others. But with him having several moments where he reverts, several moments where his healing is non-linear, viewers see it as an annoying personality trait, not a trauma symptom he is trying to overcome. And one that he does. I cannot emphasize enough that he does overcome this and that the narrative specifically focuses on it. I’ve seen so many people say it was a writing flaw, that they never criticized Chris for his attachment to Sonic... it’s the focus of two season finales, what are you talking about? I think at that point, it’s just you.

Just think about why you find him annoying. You do not have to like Chris as a character but please recognize that his arc is a realistic portrayal of a neglected child and that’s why he is the way he is.

Part XI: Conclusion

I was gonna write a full-ass conclusion here but tumblr’s already trying to kill me over wordcount so uh. tl;dr Chris isn’t annoying he’s a traumatized child and this is something the narrative notices, examines, and resolves. What this means is that it’s not a writing problem, it’s a character flaw brought on by trauma that his character arc makes him heal from.

Leave him alone.

[gvenevera]

Kuroshitsuji Musical ~ 寄宿学校の秘密 (Secrets of the Boarding School) 2024 ~ VERA’S REVIEW!

Yes you read that right! I’ve had the most fateful chance to watch the very first performance of the newest Kuromyu in Hyogo last Saturday, so I figured I’ll eternalize some of my best memories here.

Before we begin: the LIVE STREAMING is available for the LAST PERFORMANCE, September 29th 2024, HERE! For only 3800 yen, you’ll get to watch it live at home, or watch it later for up to 1 week (October 6th)! Apparently you need a Japanese VPN though, if anyone knows how to navigate the site, please do share.

A few disclaimers from me:

*Anti-shippers DNI. This post barely has any shipping content at all but I don’t like people who harass others over fictional preferences. I’m a shipper, I can’t help being biased for my OTPs.

**Since photos were prohibited in the venue, I’ve included stage pictures featured in official news websites or accounts.

***This is by no means a critical review but merely a fangirl’s ramblings, and I often drew comparisons to the original stage play Kuroshitsuji Musical: Secrets of the Boarding School (2021). For reference, I suggest you watch it first! I intentionally avoided rewatching the 2021 version close to the airing date though, so my memories may not be accurate. Also my Japanese is mediocre so I apologize if there were important dialogues I didn’t catch.

Introduction

I know, sorry for the dilly-dally intro. But I’d like to first stress that ever since I started following Kuroshitsuji in my first year of university (like 9 years ago now lmao), I’ve ALWAYS dreamed to watch the stage musical live in person. When 2024’s performance was announced immediately after the last episode of the anime, I was overjoyed to see that our old cast was coming back.

And it was fate that gave me the opportunity - my scheduled work program this year was set to be in Kyoto AND during September! Needless to say, I had the Kuromyu ticket bought and reserved first, before my confirmation with the Kyoto office or my visa and plane ticket. Priorities, right?

Quick remark on the ticket process: I hit a snag right in the beginning because the ticket reservation website Eplus required a Japanese phone number to sign up. I contacted multiple people (middle school friend whose brother used to work in Japan, another who was quarter-Japanese, several dealer websites with high rate exchanges), until I settled on my roommate’s friend from high school who was currently working there. Many thanks to her and my roommate for the help!

She took care of registration for me - even so the advance sales was a LOTTERY ticket! We fortunately got the lucky draw - I saw many Japanese fans on X who were not so lucky, while others bought in bulk to sell later. Then, I used the online barcode to exchange for a paper ticket when I arrived in Japan on September 1st. That’s when I get to know my seat number - 3rd floor, 2nd row B. A very far position from the stage, but it’s alright because we’re here for the atmosphere anyway!

The performances for the first 2 days were set in Hyogo Performing Arts Center, KOBELCO grand hall. I’ve honestly never been to any kind of music performance (or even concerts) in my life, so I was blown away by the sheer size of the venue.

By 10 AM, the audience was trickling in. I was in awe of the fact that you can tell who was coming in to watch kuromyu - beautiful women dressed in black-and-white tones, many even sporting gothic lolita bows and dresses to keep up with the Victorian England theme. In fact, it felt like the whole of Ikebukuro were gathered here in this very building!

We were ushered into the hall entrance at 11 AM and let me tell you, the crowd was suffocating! In front of the theater, there was a goods section for Kuromyu merch. I’m so glad I took the time to queue up because it seems some of the merch were starting to sell out by the second day. The booth clerk looked perplex to see a non-Japanese customer here though. Here’s how the line looked like, and this was still early before most of the audiences got in:

(We’re not supposed to take any photos but I saw the warning signs too late…Here’s a view from where I was sitting on the third floor.)

I realized then as we were settling in that some ladies around me had binoculars!! Well how was I supposed to know you could bring those here, instead of trying to find those fancy opera glasses!?! Ah well, I was lucky that I’d recently had my prescription glasses updated and the seat to my left was vacant, so I could lean in to see the center better.

The Performance

While it is true that you can barely see the actors’ faces from the balcony seats, it was the grandness of the performance itself that blew me away. For the first time I could see the stage in all its entirety, all the actors dancing in synchronization, and the special effects…oh it had improved A LOT from 3 years prior!

The stage sets for Weston may look a tad “crowded” in the still photo, as compared to the original where they used white backgrounds but in reality, it blended in so prettily with the flashing stage lights. The middle section was a rotating floor and one of my memorable scenes was where Ciel and Sebastian were discussing their plans while crossing the rotating stage, to give the illusion of “strolling across the school grounds.” Sounds like a simple trick but if looked amazing from above.

On to the story itself - the execution actually barely changed from the 2021 rendition, which for me, was a relief! Now I know, some would argue a rerun should add in different elements, because who would want to see the same thing twice right? From past experiences with Kuromyu, the reruns tend to be hit or miss - different actors, different song remixes, voice changes, and so on. For this performance, I could barely tell that the cast (apart from Ciel, Sebastian and Undertaker) were all new members. Everyone got into character flawlessly!

The story of course followed the entirety of the Public School Arc. The script and choreography was almost identical to the 2021 stage musical version. If you would remember, this Kuroshitsuji arc was the first to be portrayed on stage before the anime adaptation - same as previously, they seemed to take inspiration from the manga only rather than the anime.

Some key moments from the play:

The opening sequence was again a recap of the previous arcs - Jack the Ripper (Lycoris that Blazed the Earth), Book of Circus (Noah’s Ark Circus), Book of the Atlantic (Tango on the Campania). I’ve always loved this part because you could tell they slipped in iconic themes from the past musicals.

Perfect Black: the main theme, and my favorite from this stage! I’m so happy to have heard it live! *swoons* Thank god they didn’t do anything weird to remix it. The whole cast dancing together was beautiful! However I thought 2021 did it better with the dramatic light focus on Sebastian during the chorus drop.

Ciel’s Earl of Phantomhive outfit was changed from the glittery blue suit to a blue-green checkered coat this year. (I’d have bought his Earl photoshoot set if I knew it beforehand) Yana-sensei later tweeted that she was the one to re-design it, to better match Eito. Then Eito Konishi himself replied, saying he was honored to play as Ciel Phantomhive, to which Yana-sensei praised his singing and called him “Eito-bocchan” …boy was he fanboying hard over that. He’s one of us!!

Arrival at Weston: I don’t have a comment on the P4 in particular, they were all straightforward from the manga. I think I like Redmond’s character the most here, he looked very pretty with the side-ponytail and while he was a show-off still, he wasn’t as annoying or arrogant as I somehow expected.

A notable interaction: Violet forcing Greenhill to pose for him at the swan gazebo. Greenhill’s actor really looked strained trying to keep an upside down bridge pose (Edward was supporting his back, but kept getting distracted). When he broke the pose and got up, Violet hit him over the head with his sketchbook so hard that the thump echoed through the hall.

As for the Prefect’s Fags: Edward and Cheslock were giving off some suspiciously gay rivals-to-lovers vibes over here. Which I kinda vibed with, I hope they kept the energy into the Blue Cult Arc!

One important thing: they kept the ALL the Fag lines! Which in Japanese accent also kinda sounded like them repeatedly calling each other “Fućk”. Oh how I wish the anime had kept those!

Soma Asman Kadar: now this guy deserves an ovation just for himself. Not only did he kill the role, he was also the funniest! Soma’s song was greatly improved and lengthened with catchier music and dancing - when his troupe “arrived” at Weston, he even dragged Ciel and Clayton to join in. I can’t do it justice, you have GOT to see those two English gentlemen crack the Indian dance moves! His pestering of Maurice Cole was hilarious and he kept exasperating Ciel out of his character, their chemistry was wonderful. I really didn’t expect to get hooked by Soma in this arc out of all people! Too bad Agni wasn’t here.

Maurice Cole’s miniarc - Flawless. Sometimes I wonder if he was an easy character to play just because his character trait is so extremely over-the-top lol.

The library kabedon scene and sebaciel burning Purple House scene didn’t exist. Another scene cut off from the last musical was where Clayton and the Blue House kids were congratulating Ciel on his fag duties and Sebastian took the chance to blend in with them. Sadly that was one of my favorite adlibs.

Ciel’s dream sequence: this was originally in the 2021 musical. After a talk with Macmillain made him revisit his past trauma, Ciel “dreamed” of the cultists, and Sebastian’s close call with Undertaker in BotA. I actually forgot about this part when I watched it in theater - the highlight was sebaciel reenacting the scene in BotA where they reached for each other, the enactment surprisingly gave me the impression of Ciel’s “worry” over Sebastian’s “vulnerability” here. Unlike the 2021 version though, Undertaker didn’t pull Ciel into a bridal carry or referenced the R!Ciel wake-up scene as clearly.

The second half after the break was the long-awaited Cricket Match. Like the previous version, there was no scene of Ciel jumping into Master Michaelis’ arms, but I think they just couldn’t fit that one into the sequence. The cricket songs were mostly the same as the original - with an improvement being them cutting out Red House’s random beauty pageant contest. It actually felt like the cricket match went by faster this time, which was a win in my book. I’ve heard people complain of Kuromyu 2021 being a “Prince of Cricket” musical, hence the bad reviews back then.

The laxative meat pie scene was hilarious. From Sebastian faking it as a student complete with Red House’s uniform, to the team’s diarrhea horrors. Redmond stole the show again, as he was going to help Harcourt in the middle of the field, but tragedy struck which made him deadpan: “Oh. Someone get Harcourt.” Then immediately left the stage lol. The Blue House kids lifted Harcourt out.

The Green vs Purple house battle was the same as last time. I always felt bad to see Cheslock being the only Purple kid doing his best because without any support member cast while Violet was sitting in the grass. But this time, he gave Cheslock a tree sculpture of his bust as a good-job reward! Good for them.

Lastly Green vs Blue. They incorporated the rotating stage again in the last batting when Greenhill accidentally hit Ciel. The end of the match cut straight to the Thames Boat Ride, then they did the Blue House cheering scene after. Sebastian finally got to do his signature bridal carry, awww.

Midnight tea party: the setting was even more beautiful than last time. Undertaker letting his hair fall from his hat was iconic as usual. I was impressed with Master Agares’ fight scenes because his actor looked quite older than his 2021 predecessor. I always liked how they did Derrick Arden’s death in the musical, it felt more anguished from the P4 POV while in the anime, it just felt like a gruesome horror scene.

Final musical number was Ciel-Sebastian-Undertaker chorus during their fight in the garden. Music and choreography seemed to be similar, EXCEPT they somehow changed the iconic “Your life is my priority” scene!!! 2021’s version had me hold my breath as Sebastian had his arm possessively hooked around Ciel and took off his glove with his teeth (seriously, you have to see it yourself). This time they had Sebastian and Ciel reenact the scene on the highest stage instead of front and center, and I didn’t feel as much suspense nor was there any glove-removal from what I could see. It was also a weird placement because they were so far away, and Undertaker should’ve been the one on the top as he did his goodbye pose holding the moon.

We end the story with Sebastian recapping the aftermath with Weston’s students, and finally sebaciel’s conversation back at the manor. Again, Ciel reiterates that Sebastian is the only one who could never lie nor betray his trust. Perfect Black came on as an outro, and I got chills when Sebastian ended the last verse on a raised note!

The curtain call was the experience I’d waited for. Somehow I only realized just then that the actors would do the full call during their finale performance, which was what we got to see in the recordings! That day, after the cast bowed twice, the exit announcement immediately came on but guess what? The audience, including myself, kept clapping all the way through the announcement, it went for so long that the cast actually came out to take another bow! As they returned on stage, most of us also stood up for a standing ovation - according to twitter this doesn’t seem to be a regular occurrence outside of the finale. It felt like a truly wholesome “welcome back” for the troupe and for Kuromyu, especially after the rather harsh criticisms from the previous stage (due to major cast and style changes, even I took a while to bring myself to watch it) and the long break due to the COVID years.

Overall summary

Kuroshitsuji Musical 2024 was a faithful rerun of its predecessor. They succeeded with the musical numbers, new cast, overall adaptation of the story. The settings, props and special effects were wonderfully upgraded. The original cast carried the show: Eito Konishi’s singing felt greatly improved and I thought he carried himself as more mature than his last performance as Ciel. Sebastian’s Toshiki Tateishi had a mesmerizing voice the more I listened to him, he never went out of breath even while dancing or fighting - truly vocals fit for the troupe leader. Kandai Ueda did well as his own Undertaker too, even with Undertaker’s peculiar accent.

My few complaints: I felt like the P4 cast (bar Redmond) could do to have more distinction in their tones and movements. It felt hard to distinguish who was talking at times. The performance seemed to have a faster pacing this time around, and you get less absorbed in certain conversations between the characters, so I wished they’d added in slow scenes here and there. And of course I miss the signature sebaciel moments that I’ve mentioned - granted, this manga arc had always been my least favored because of the lack of sebaciel interactions anyway! So I’d say they did the best with the source material.

While I enjoyed seeing my favorite production performed live with the music blasting through my eardrums, it was the atmosphere that truly made the experience for me. Sitting in the 4-storeys grand hall full of some 2000 Kuroshitsuji fans really pulled me back in time, especially during the standing ovation. I’m so happy to see my favorite series so loved after all these years. I’m sure Yana-sensei could feel it too.

I wish a successful performance for the cast going forward to Tokyo, and hopeful for many more musicals to come!

[skzcre]

Skz stroke game…. Thoughts 👁️👄👁️

oh i’ve got some thoughts alright 😳

on team “slow, sensual and deep” we haaaave changbin, lino, hyunjin, lix n chan !! <333

it varies for each of them tbh, like. changbin and hyunjin are real romantics, they want to take their time to enjoy every single centimeter of your body. they want to watch your face twist in pleasure, they want you to grip tightly onto them.

binnie always has this self satisfied smirk on his face but pure love in his eyes, loves when you grab his biceps and arch into him when he goes particularly deep 🤧 still on board “changbin best stroke game in skz” hands down, we’ve seen the way he moves those pretty hips. you better believe he knows exactly what he’s doing.

hyune is just fully obsessed with you i’ve talked abt it like a million times and i can’t get over the thought of his jaw hanging in awe watching how you write underneath him. he kills me truly

now w lino, lix n chan; they’re just as romantic tbh. we all know lino has heaps and heaps of love to give and he also kind of loves having you at his “mercy”, he’s just a little bit more of a tease abt it compared to bin n hyun. he fucks you at a regular pace then stops to shove himself so deep in you you swear you’re seeing stars. then he coos at you, “mm, i know baby. it feels really good, yeah? you can take more for me, can’t you?”

lix n chan are still on the slow sensual spectrum but both of them … whew. catch them in a Certain mood and they’re just. i cant explain it in any other way than they’re just absolutely insane. they both have this duality, wanting to worship your body but also just loving the way you scream their name when they start pounding you >.< god chan in particular it’s like he’s curved perfectly to fit you, always hits that sweet spot that makes your toes curl.

on team “it varies but either way they have you basically crying by the end of the night” we have seungmo n imie <333 similar to lix n chan it just depends on the day, what kind of mood you catch them in.

both of them are absolutely meticulous in the way they practically pick you apart, pure teases through and through. both of them are highkey bullies, will get you completely riled up with their words alone then constantly bring you right to the edge of heaven before dropping you just to hear that desperate whine.

i cant decide who would be meaner honestly 😖 seungmo speaks in such a way that makes you feel tiny and helpless underneath him, his stroke game isn’t the best in comparison to the others (not saying he’s bad) but he more than makes up for it with his words, fingers and tongue <33

and imie .. an all rounder really. bullies tf out of you, can be ruthless as hell about it, trades between slow deep thrusts and pounding your lights out to keep you on your toes. that being said he can get rlly overwhelmed by just how good you feel so he has to pace himself or you’re getting fucked through the floor.

n then on team, “absolutely amazing but still a wildcard” we have bby han <33 he’s got the duality, he can be anything you need him to be. he can fuck you nice and slow, kiss you real sweet and tell you how much he loves you. he can be absolutely filthy, pull your hair and leave bites and bruises everywhere; call you his pretty little cumdump. as expected of the ace, we love a multifaceted boy.

so to summarize with a ranking, best to “not as good” (i don’t wanna say worst that sounds bad :p)

changbin

lino n hyun tied for second imo

chan

han

jeongin

felix

seungmin

[pikahlua]

Fine I’ll explain the joke

Send this post to anyone who needs it to understand why the Viz translation is actually really good.

I can’t believe this page is leading to the third time I’ve had to do this (first with the “Swiss cheese” thing and then with the “biggest grand slam/one closest to Izuku Midoriya” thing).

Let’s talk about the very intentionally bad slang and author’s footnotes for Camie in chapter 380.

Context: Camie is a gag character who speaks in gyaru slang. Her use of slang is so heavy that all the other characters often find her speech incomprehensible. The cringe slang is the gag. This gag is emphasized in chapter 380 by her speech being so incomprehensible that even the author writing her speech doesn’t quite understand her. He leaves notes in the margins explaining all her slang for the benefit of the audience, but with each note he gets progressively more confused about what she’s saying and ultimately gives up on the explanation. THAT’S THE JOKE.

For comparison purposes, here is the original Japanese scan and the Viz official translation. Note how both have footnotes in the margins.

Here is what she says in Japanese (katakana is represented as capital letters):

te yuu ka KAN’ICHI! ※1 ROOTO ※2 no RENMEN ※3 KOru ※4 toka chou SHAKOTAN ※5 da shi

If I were to translate this literally into English, first of all I wouldn’t be able to, because there aren’t literal translations of slang, but my best attempt would be:

I mean, close shave! ※1 A Rohto ※2 hottie ※3 passing away ※4 would be like a super shakotan ※5 or something

Note that I’ve got no good translation at all for “shakotan.” That’s because shakotan is a type of car that’s been modified to ride low to the ground. It’s from bousouzoku subculture and seems to be popular in the yankii subculture too. I’m not gonna act like I know what the hell I’m talking about with this slang. The best I had when I did my initial translation of the chapter was “low-rider,” but it’s really not the same thing at all; Shakotan has more to do with drag racing and such.

But even if I had a good translation for shakotan, the rest of the sentence is nigh incomprehensible given how much of it is slang. Here are the footnotes Horikoshi left translated into English:

※1 Abbreviation for “a hair’s breadth.” ※2 Rohto Pharmaceutical. Eye drops. Good for the eyes. It means “eye-pleasing.” ※3 A romantically desirable man ※4 Belated (deceased). It means “to pass away.” Probably. ※5 When a vehicle’s height is lowered. Dunno.

Yes, Horikoshi literally wrote “probably” and “dunno” in there. That’s the joke. The footnotes are part of the joke.

So I think (but have absolutely no confidence in saying) the message she’s trying to convey is that letting a sexy dude like Hawks die would be like taking a perfectly good car and cutting it down into a super super low car. Maybe. (I’m honestly just as confused as Horikoshi on this one.)

This means that in order to preserve and translate the joke into English, the translator had to find a balance between relevant English slang that is incomprehensible but also just comprehensible enough for the audience to get what’s going on--oh, and slang that also works with the joke continued in the original footnotes.

I feel really proud of my “close shave” translation for slang that comes from “a hair’s breadth,” but another translator could easily decide that “close shave” isn’t slangy enough or isn’t incomprehensible enough. Rohto is a hard one to translate by itself, but the renmen word (short for ren’ai ikemen) easily refers to a sexy man, so “hottie” is one of the better translation options by far (sorry, but “twink” doesn’t mean what some of y’all think it means--it’s a bad translation here). The slang for “passing away” is a difficult one and the one I was most interested in seeing how the translator would handle. We don’t have many words in English that are slang for dying but maintain a tone of respect like you’re sad or don’t want the person to die. In my opinion, “unalive” is a pretty good attempt.

But then the translator also needed some slang that he could maintain Horikoshi’s jokes for footnotes #4 and #5, namely his “probably” and “dunno.” There was no way shakotan would make the cut. The translator chose “fetch” and “no cap” as the solution. They’re cringey enough slang that walk the line between incomprehensible and just comprehensible enough AND allow for a literal description in the footnote to joke about how the writer just gave up on understanding. Maybe you think you could come up with better slang the translator could use, but remember one does have to consider the entire reading audience and what slang they’ll be able to understand. All in all, the translator did the best they could in these circumstances. Whether or not a joke like this would land very well in English versus in Japanese isn’t really the point, as the translator’s job is just to translate the joke that’s there. What’s funny in another culture isn’t always funny in your own.

That said, I love me some meta jokes, so I did enjoy this one.

[connorsnothereeither]

What was oenone and Ulysses relationship? Was it mentor/mentee or just coworkers or pseudo father/child or what?

Honestly the answer is sort of all three of those!

I wish I had gotten more time to explore their exact dynamic (the three short stories wasn’t quite enough to pack in their exact relationship before it collapsed) but very much a blend of all the dynamics you listed.

Theoretically they were coworkers. They were assigned to the same projects to combine their skills on creating the guardians. I think their friendship did grow into a sort of mentor/mentee relationship if only because Ulysses was older and more experienced with the world both in and outside of the war. And I think, definitely from Oenone’s perspective, there was a level of psuedo-father/child dynamic. The were only 16, when they met, after all. There was a level of care and familial love between them which grew from their friendship and the mentor/mentee dynamic that certainly filled that space for both of them. And the intent was certainly in my mind that if not for the time he spent with Oenone, Ulysses could never grow to be the father he was for Aax.

I don’t know if I’ve spoken about this already outside of just to the cast, but one of the loose ideas for Oenone as a character when they were conceptualized was sort of intended contrast Ulysses and Rae at the time in lore. The way they were very similar people, before their circumstances changed them. And the best way I can describe the relationship between Ulysses and Oenone, is that she was almost to Ulysses what Bruin was to Rae. Or at least he could have been. That “lab-assistant-turned-closest-family” relationship. Only… Ulysses caved under the evil around him, and threw that away. Ulysses wasn’t able to save the person he loved, because he wasn’t strong enough to fight for them. He let himself spiral, and he pushed Oenone further away, rather than letting her help, and that ended badly for both of them.

While it wasn’t planned like this (that idea sort of fell to the side after the initial pitch), and Oenone certainly grew to much more than that in the end, I think in hindsight that comparison is really effective now that we’ve seen what happened to Rae when they believed Icarus killed Bruin, in Brother’s Final Stand. The last straw, and losing that one person being the final breaking point. Ulysses just didn’t have the luck Rae did in Bruin still being alive. He just broke, when he lost Oenone.

Their relationship also helped to place Ulysses narratively into a bit of a cycle. Ulysses was to Oenone as Dr Askles was to Ulysses. A mentor. A parental figure. A coworker. A friend, in a very friendless place. It allowed Ulysses a space to grow from a scared, broken, grieving person, to someone capable of teaching, and loving again. Even if it took him a while to get there, and he continued to spiral throughout Leviathan, the seeds of that chance for hope and kindness were planed with Oenone, and he learned that from the way Askles treated him.

This ended up being way longer than I expected, sorry lol. I just have a lot of thoughts on Oenone, as they’re a very important character to me personally for a handful of reasons and I love the way their character shaped Ulysses narratively, even if we only got to see them briefly ✨

[pedrostylez]

How The Crow Flies - pt. 8

Javier Peña x fem!reader x Frankie Morales crossover

Word count: 3.4k

Chapter Summary: You return to the apartment Javier set you up in, and find him waiting for you

Chapter Warnings and Disclaimers: 18+ only. I am not responsible for what you read on the internet. You have been warned! Locations and descriptions of places may be inaccurate in comparison to each story (Narcos and Triple Frontier). Timelines are obviously different between the two stories, so we are going to meet in the middle and say we are in the early 2000s. These are not necessarily canon characters in regard to how they act, how they treat people, and their current relationships. Hurt feelings, mentions of violence, hitting, slapping, mean words (again we got a Capricorn reader who maybe feels bad for putting Javi in this situation) mentions of fucking others, some jealousy, Javi big time emotionally damaged, shower fingering sort of smut as a way to make it up to reader, DUBCON mentions and references

A/N: Thank you guys for being patient. Honestly, February has been one of the worst months ever for me on a personal level, and so writing has both been difficult and all I would rather do. I'm thinking about how best to write the next 2 chapters, and part of me thinks I can really just have it be 1 more...we will see! If I have missed any tags for trigger warnings, please let me know and I will fix it. Thank you for reading!!!

Taglist: @thevoiceinyourheadx @suzdin @survivingandenduring @bariskaplans @inept-the-magnificent @casa-boiardi @paleidiot @darkheartgatita @missladym1981 @mellymbee

It’s all mostly a blur.

Driving up to the apartment and noticing Javier’s vehicle parked in the driveway. The tuft of his hair poking over the top of his seat, lolled to one side as if he was asleep. 

The sun on your face as you slide sunglasses over your eyes, warming your skin as you unlock the front door. 

The way Javier’s car door shuts behind him, calling your name and following you into the apartment. It’s like you barely hear him call your name as he trails you up to the doorway.

Staring at Javier and seeing only Frankie, wondering what he is doing in the moment is the only thing you can think about. The ghost feeling of Frankie’s lips on yours as he whispered a goodbye to you just a few hours ago. His smile as he pulled you back to him, telling you to not come back to the jungle unless it was to “ruin these assholes’ day.” The way his thumb and finger pinched gently at your chin when you rolled your eyes; the way he couldn’t stop looking at your mouth until he finally leaned in to kiss you again. 

You couldn’t get those things out of your head. Swirling, swirling, swirling around as you walked around your apartment and began sliding things into cardboard boxes. 

The way Javier asks where you have been doesn’t really register. 

No, nothing is really memorable until his fingers grasp around your wrist and spin you around to face him. His eyes, not trained on your face but on your shirt, welling with tears. “What happened to you?”

It was all just noise until he says that. You blink, shaking your head and pulling your wrist out of his grip. He follows you, hesitant but determined as he speaks again. “Please, hermosa I-I’ve been so worried–”

“You blew my cover.” It spills out of your mouth, holding your hand up toward his chest to silently tell him to stop moving. 

He pauses, visibly paling and mouth agape like a fish. It was hard to surprise him–you had come to know that over the months of working with him. Right now, you have somehow done so, his eyes searching yours desperately for an answer. 

He blindly is reaching for the wall behind him, his knuckles flushing white as he squeezes at the door frame his hand landed on. “What?” He hiccups, looking you over and eyes continuously going to your shirt-over and over and over. 

You set the cardboard box down in your hands-half full of the trinkets he had told you to decorate with. You have this urge to suddenly go back to your own apartment. “You called me so many times that I was cornered, and I had to say who I was to not have my neck sliced open.”

It feels like a bit of an exaggeration at this moment, especially after this morning with Frankie. But it is the truth-you do not doubt that if you hadn’t said who you were, that Frankie would have killed you in that moment. 

Javier’s eyes flash back to your shirt again, and you finally look down. You find your shirt stained with dried blood, likely from the cuts that Frankie put there. “Did…d-did you get hurt?” His voice is barely above a whisper, hands releasing the door frame to run through his hair.  

You look back down to the task at hand, placing drinking glasses into the box. This overwhelming feeling of annoyance starts to course through you, hands beginning to shake as you stack each glass. The clinking, the piercing sound of glass on glass starts to rub at your bones unpleasantly. 

You close your eyes to try and recenter yourself, Javier’s pleas fading to the background again as he asks more questions. A loud crash has you opening your eyes again, glass shattered at your feet from where you’ve missed the box. Breaths come heavy, your chest rising and falling more rapidly as your anger comes to a head. “I had a fucking knife held to my throat because of you.” 

It comes barreling out of your mouth, the same way you said your cover was blown, but more angry. You’ve whirled around to him, clenching your jaw and lifting a shaking finger. “And it’s your fucking fault!”

Javier shakes his head adamantly, sniffling and blinking rapid to hold back tears. Brokenly, he asks for you to wait, to hold on before flying completely off the handle. 

You can’t help how you’re still shaking with anger, stepping forward to give Javi a shove to step away from you. “You called me so many times that I was backed into a corner, had a knife held to my throat!”

“Please, baby you weren’t coming home–”

“I had to say I was DEA! This is your fault! You called when Frankie–”

“Frankie?” His hands have clasped around your wrists now, the sadness and worry swiped away from his face in an instant. You realize your mistake, naming Frankie out loud as the person that discovered who you were, instead of one of the security guards. “What the fuck was Frankie doing keeping you an extra day? What were you doing together?”

You scoff, attempting to pull away from him but his grip tightens. Javi’s eyes are wild with anger, searching for answers he still can’t seem to find. “That’s none of your fucking business.”

“It is my fucking business when you’re getting threatened by some drug addict that was practically fired out of his little squad he was in with Santiago Pope.” He snarls, releasing your wrists and looking around your apartment, pacing. “Really? None of my concern? Are you fucking serious right now?”

“I’ve gotten a lot of information from him.” You attempt to sound secure in your answer, clearing your throat to have it come out louder than before. You didn’t know that about Frankie. “He wouldn’t have known or found out if you hadn’t been calling me over and over.”

Javi has the audacity to begin laughing, scratching at the back of his neck and glaring in your direction. “What, do you keep me as ‘PENA DEA’ on that phone? Are you that fucking stupid?” He’s reaching into his back pocket for his cigarettes and lighting one, blowing smoke directly in your face to piss you off.

You reel back, surprise overtaking your insecurity about Frankie’s past with another slew of anger.  “Are you stupid enough to call me over and over and not think that maybe I was busy gathering information? Like that maybe they are getting raided today? Right now!”

Javi stubs out the cigarette on the counter, watching the plastic burn slightly before throwing it into the sink. “Right now?” He asks, watching your single nod in defiance. He runs his hands through his hair again, not able to hold back the groan of frustration.  “And you didn’t think to come back sooner? To call me on the way? You waited until you were here?”

“They aren’t after what we’re after–”

“Stechner has been on my ass since I’ve had you on this. He’s sniffing around for a mistake, and you’re prancing around being an actual fucking whore?” He yells, face heated and eyes wide to take you in. 

And what can you do, exactly? Lie and have it be another argument? Not say the truth and have him know that you have, in fact, been sleeping with your own informant? Instead of a shrug, or an apology, or an admittance, you pull out the only thing in your arsenal that you can think of. “How is that any different than what you did before?”

He shouts as if pained by your words, hunching over himself before standing straight to point a finger at you. “I can’t believe you!” 

Now it’s your turn to laugh, your hand rubbing at your forehead.  “What were you actually fucking expecting right now, Javi? You asked me to sleep around with men for information that wasn’t even part of an active mission. And then you blew my cover, and had the audacity to yell at me!” You screech back. 

When he doesn’t respond immediately you’re back to pushing him, wanting him out of your space. You want him to leave, to leave you alone.

To his credit, Javier takes your shoves, your slaps, and only closes his eyes to breathe deeply through his nose. You wonder briefly if you are going to leave a bruise on him. 

He opens his eyes and stares at you, waiting patiently for your shoves to reduce to almost nothing. When he speaks it comes out calm, ready to try again. “You could have called me. Before you stayed the extra night, after he held a knife to your throat-you should have called me if you needed me.”

If you needed me. “I don’t need you.”

The pain in his eyes is apparent, reaching for you again to hold you steady against him. He furrows his brows, shaking his head and desperate to get his point across to you. “You don’t get it.”

You shut your eyes, refusing to look at him. He gives you a small shake, sighing deeply.”You don’t understand how terrified I was? After we fought you haven’t spoken to me, or called me back and I’ve been barely holding it together.” You go to interrupt him, but he continues. “I thought I lost you last night. Thought you were trapped, or hurt and…I shouldn’t have called you so much that it put you in danger, but if you had just told me what was going on–”

He sighs heavily, clasping a hand around the back of your neck to hold you still as his forehead presses to yours. “I need you.” A whimper bubbles out of your chest, listening to his rough swallow. “This isn’t about the money, or the side mission. I need you; do you understand?”

You open your eyes, watering and wide as you stare him down. You’re searching, trying to see if he’s lying. “You can’t guilt trip me.”

Javier holds his breath, pulling you impossibly closer. Your chest is pressed to his, and you’re sure that he can feel your heartbeat through the layers of clothing, pounding. “I’m not. Please, hermosa hear me.” 

It’s quiet between you, your breath puffing over his face in humid clouds. You soften slowly, tension leaving your body until you’re leaning all your weight against him. You can’t help it; you’re trying to understand. He was concerned, worried, not thinking as a boss, but as someone that cares for you. He sighs, wrapping his arms around your shoulders to hold you close to him. “I thought I lost you, baby. I’m sorry.”

You’re silent for a while longer, nodding when you finally decide. “I’m sorry.” You whisper against his chest, hands grabbing at the fabric. “I should have called you back.”

Javi hums, rubbing his hand down your spine gently. You pull away from him, sniffling and looking up to his face. “There’s a whole team of them…just raiding the place for money. There won’t be any proof they were there.”

Javier nods, pressing a kiss to your forehead in acceptance. “Let them take the money.”

Javier ushered you out of the apartment quickly, packing what boxes you’ve started into the back of his car and promising to stop by at a later time to get the rest of it. 

He’s such a fuck up. 

He thought he could handle this months ago, when he first met you and got you involved in this side mission. He thought that you would give some intel, they would do a raid, and that would be the end of it. 

He was sorely mistaken. 

You’re next to him in his car as he pulls away from the apartment, and his hand slips over yours. You’re stiff for a moment before looking over at him and sighing, squeezing his fingers in reassurance. “You’ll never have to do that again.” He promises, and he’s not sure if he’s promising never to do undercover again, or to being away from him. 

He doesn’t want to define it in case you don’t want the latter. 

Javi keeps quiet when you don’t respond, squeezing the meat of your palm in his and rushing to his own apartment. He hadn’t told you explicitly but he was not going to leave you alone to your own devices; the dried blood on your shirt had him spiraling enough that he wanted to watch over you tonight. 

He has so many things he wants to say, but none of them come out as he unlocks his door and takes your bag for you. He wants to ask if you’re actually okay, if this is what you expected, if you were still mad at him. Were you just appeasing him to stop arguing, or were you genuinely sorry? What happened with Frankie beyond a knife to your throat that made you not tell him what was going on?

None of it comes out as you tell him quietly that you are going to take a shower. He just nods, watching you step away from him and shut the door softly behind you. No, nothing comes out of his mouth until a few minutes later after the water has started, that he hears deep breaths and sniffles echoing off the tile. 

He didn’t want to push you, but the sound of you crying was something he couldn’t handle. It urged him forward, lightly knocking on the door and calling your name. When you don’t respond he opens the door, eyes falling to your defeated figure in the stream of water. 

“Are you alright, hermosa?” He asks, watching as you step away from the water to glance at him. Your eyes are red, waterlogged and shivering as you nod at him. 

“Y-yes. Yeah.” You sniffle, shaking the water from your head and attempting to cover yourself. “I’m fine.”

Javier pauses, stepping forward to close the bathroom door behind him. It’s hot in the bathroom, humid clouds floating from the shower head to him and fogging the mirror. It makes it harder to breathe, but he doesn’t mind if he gets to be closer to you. Javier observes you, not letting his eyes wander much until you face him fully. He can’t help but let his eyes fall to the neat lines across your chest and collarbone, red and angry staring back at him. “What’s that?”

You look down like you weren’t aware you had cuts on your chest, dumbfounded for a moment before you give a noncommittal shrug. “Just a few scratches.”

Javi shakes his head, stepping toward the glass shower door and popping it open. A closer look is all he tells himself, just to inspect that they are fine and that you won’t die from bleeding out in the middle of the night, or of infection at a later date.

His hand reaches out tentatively, running his finger across one of the marks and looking up to your face to watch for a reaction. When you don’t have one, he sighs and let’s his eyes settle on yours. “I’m sorry.” He whispers, his thumb drifting up to the skin covering your pulse, rubbing back and forth as soothingly as possible. 

“You don’t need to be.” you say just as quietly, lifting a hand and resting it on his chest. The water on your hand seeps through his shirt, leaving a hot brand on his skin.

Javi’s throat closes, emotions running high. “I should have protected you.”

You shake your head, chastising him. “There was nothing more you could have done, Javi.”

He winces, pressing himself further against you. His shirt is fully soaked now, but he doesn’t care. “I shouldn’t have let you go in the jungle.”

“It’s okay, Javi.” You pat at his chest, pulling your hand away as if you’re only just now realizing that you’ve gotten his clothing wet. His own covers yours, bringing it back to the imprint you’ve left–he wants to feel you against him.

“Please, forgive me.” He begs; he knows he’s begging. He doesn’t beg as far as he is concerned, but something in him is crumbling. He leans forward and presses his lips to your skin, above your brow, your cheekbone, your jaw. He breathes heavily in your ear, shutting his eyes tightly.

He feels your slight nod, a quiet “I forgive you, Javi.” and he’s choked up with tears. He’s rushing to join you in the shower, a couple buttons popping off his shirt as it slides down his arms, your fingers going for the button of his jeans. 

Once he’s fully naked and pressed against you, the water is beating down on his back, your fingers drawing gentle shapes up his spine and his face resting against your shoulder. If he opens his eyes, he can see the cuts directly in front of him, and it makes him shutter more. “I’ll make it right, I promise.”

“There’s nothing to make right.” You sigh, tapping with only your index finger as you think. “We’ll raid Lorea, and it will be over.”

He nods, pressing his lips to your collarbone and feeling the mark from Frankie’s knife. He wants to punch himself for not telling you sooner about what he found out. About how Fransisco Morales was a drug addict, that he was not mentally in the right place the last time he was in the military. It feels suffocating, knowing that you had been around him, speaking to him, fucking him. 

How did it all go so wrong?

His hands drift from your shoulder blades, down to your hips and give you a squeeze. “Let me make it up to you.” He gruffs, finally making eye contact with you. He sees your confusion, your sudden realization of what he means.

“You…you don’t have to.” You say quietly, letting his fingers drift to the curve of your stomach. Watching him, carefully assessing. 

“I want to. If you want me to?” He watches your pupils blow wide, interest peaking as his thumb brushes through the patch of hair above your center, moving down, down, down. 

You sigh heavily, swallowing and nodding again. Javier is convinced that if he can make you feel good like he knows he can, then maybe you’ll actually start to forgive him. Even if it’s slowly. His fingers drift between your folds, up and down as lightly as possible. You squirm against him, spreading your legs just enough to let his knee hold one to the side. 

Javi looks down, leaning a bit away to get a better look at you while his other hand is still wrapped around the back of your neck, soothing circles into your jaw. “You’re so pretty, baby.” Javier growls through clenched teeth, letting a finger swipe quick circles over your clit. 

You pant, reaching a hand out to his bicep and squeezing. No response, just the acknowledgement of your moan is all that he needs. 

A single finger is pressed into you, curling over and over as his eyes flick back up to yours. He’s desperate to watch you unfold, feel you pulse around a finger, anything to give him the approval, the want that he desires. 

You’re quick to finish, his thumb brushing back and forth over your clit while his finger curls inside of you, his eyes on yours as he talks you to completion. “So fucking perfect, in my place, taking what you want from me.” He whispers, pressing his lips to yours as if to seal the deal between you. 

When he pulls away, your eyes opening and half lidded in exhaustion, he reaches for the shower knob and turns it off. Javi helps you out of the shower, drying the both of you efficiently before guiding you into his bedroom where he’s already placed out clothes for you to sleep in. “I’ll be in the kitchen, if you need something, okay? Get some rest.”

He waits for your small smile and nod, hanging by the door for a moment to see his shirt fall over your torso before heading to the kitchen. He planned to stay up for the rest of the evening and through the night, planning this raid on Lorea and letting you finally get some rest. 

[merbear25]

Hey hi! Can you do romantic hcs with prussia, France and Belarus x reader who likes to draw them and does it all the time. Thanks! ^v^

Oh my goodness, what a cute idea for you to send in! I loved considering how they’d feel. I hope you enjoy what I’ve written for you.💜💜

CW: SFW, gn!reader, fluff, headcanons/scenarios

When you like drawing them (Prussia, France, Belarus)

Prussia

Of course, you would want to draw him! He had such dazzling features, so he’d be more than happy to strike a few poses for you.

He was far from shy and bashful so would be sure that you caught his good side (all of his sides were his good side).

It would go without saying that whatever you drew, whether or not it was of him, would be showered with compliments. He admired your artistic abilities. On the days you were overly critical of your art, he’d be there pointing out specific things he adored about each work of yours.

Even though he had a loud personality, the drawings you did of him when he wasn’t paying attention and simply doing mundane things got the strongest reaction out of him. This reaction was quiet in comparison to the others but was felt the most deeply.

He could understand why you’d want to draw him in a pose or doing something iconic, but seeing how much care you put into capturing his quieter moments made his heart skip a beat.

Such things were deemed as unimportant to him—not worth capturing, especially when the method was talent based. Why you thought the opposite was a mystery, and yet he was thankful for it.

France

You flattered him, honestly. He would ask if you had any specific ideas in mind so as to help pose if need be. Any props you needed him to hold to get the proportions just right would gladly be modeled with.

He did his best not to sneak peaks because he’d rather it be a surprise. Needless to say, he was nothing short of amazed with whatever the final version was—the artist was near and dear to him, meaning each work was cherished by him regardless what it was of.

There were plenty of moments he looked over at you, admiring the way you furrowed your brow in concentration. Some of the motions you made while thinking through the positions got him chuckling.

When you asked what was so funny, he waved it off by saying a random thought had crossed his mind.

There were no favorites of his. He enjoyed every style you drew in. Sure, he had a preference towards the softer and cuter depictions of himself and the other things you drew, but that never meant he saw the darker choices you made as less than extraordinary.

He enjoyed art and drew from time to time, so he’d offer to set time aside to do it together—forming a stronger bond was the overall goal.

Belarus

She wouldn’t enjoy it at first. Her insecurities would come through, ruining the precious bonding potential it held. The main reason for the cold shoulder it signaled was her not fully understanding why you wanted to.

You showed her some cute doodles you did of her, and that was what changed her mind. She came around, albeit slowly, but eventually learned to appreciate it for what it was—a sign of your adoration for her.

She’d want to sit next to you and watch the process unfold. However, she was horribly awkward about it. When you looked up at her coming over to you, she chickened out, blaming you for making her feel weird about it.

You didn’t think much of this behavior. It was just her way of attempting to reach out, so you ignored it and showed her the drawings once having finished.

The more open you were with showing your works, the more comfortable she got to the idea of you drawing her. Deep down, she enjoyed how you portrayed her—there was a beauty and delicacy in the strokes you made.

When she felt enough at ease, you had some stern-faced company looking over your shoulder as you drew. That was fine though. She was simply mesmerized by your technique and wished to observe it was all.

[thesupreme316]

This is most likely to be the weirdest things i’ve requested,

Picture,Being Hook’s twin or older sister. At the past Blood and Guts, Reader is at ringside with her brother during JB match. Then when Jack turns, she sides with Jack.

The following Wednesday, when Her and Jack are now teaming together, the promo goes on.

After Jack says

“I’m still young, I’m cashing fat checks and i’m still banging the hottest bitch in this place”

Clearing referencing to reader, then reader goes on saying something like how she should be the FTW champion since she’s older and has had more in-ring matches that follow FTW rules( I like to think that the FTW title can go to any gender), Then when hook goes to chase Jack, just after jack jumps over the barricade reader and Hook are standing toe-to-toe, allowing Jack to get away safely. 

I’ll leave the rest to you, Much love

YOU'RE FINEE

Had it Coming (Hook x Sis!Reader, Jack Perry x Fem!Reader):

Word Count: 1.3K

Supreme Speaks: hiii, thank you to @hookerforhook for the request (i miss your requests so much). I really enjoyed writing this one. If yall want more, you know what to do. please remember that you are loved and appreciated.

Warnings: none i think, is primarily angsty

Taglist: @hookerforhook @hooks-martin @triscillal @wwenhlimagines @cassie0sstuff @sheinthatfandom

Okay imma reference this post real quick in a way

You have been dating Jack for six months…so before he got into a tag team with your younger brother, Hook

Jack developed feelings for you after you decided to help him in his feud with Christian Cage (my sugar daddy)

You and Hook have the typical sibling relationship…you love him even when you fight sometimes

You’ve been through a lot together, shared a lot of interests, and you considered him to be your best friend

But right now you’re starting to tolerate him

And recently you started to grow a dislike for him

It’s not his personality or anything

It’s just the fact that even though you have won more championships, been wrestling longer, and literally helped trained the lil booger

He just managed to push you into his shadow from the crowd and your father

It pissed you off

Especially because it’s coming at the expense of you and Jack’s career

Your and Jack’s achievements started to get overlooked and Hook either hasn’t realized or he’s pretending it doesn’t exist

It’s been pissing you off

It’s been pissing Jack off

The constant comparisons, the forgetting his name, the fact people just seemed to forget about Jack

It’s just tiring

And it all leads to Jack turning on Hook at Blood and Guts

As well as you turning on your younger brother as well

Honestly, he had it coming.

That’s what you’re telling yourself.

For three days, that’s what you’ve been telling yourself.

It felt great turning your back on your brother. But, sometimes you couldn’t help but feel like there was a way to avoid all of this. As well as feeling like you’re in the middle between your brother and boyfriend. But the more that you thought about it, the more Jack would argue it’s what he deserved for pushing you away, for overshadowing you, for not thanking you, for forgetting about you, and most importantly allowing the crowd to look over you.

You deserve better. You deserve more.

Especially after how he made you and your boyfriend feel.

This leads to today, Wednesday, you and Jack were talking to the crowd about your actions. Before you could even get a word out, they started to boo you, loudly. At first, you felt small, like an ant. But the more they booed, the angrier you got and the more you tuned them out. They didn’t understand you, they couldn’t understand you. They didn’t know how you felt, yet you were portrayed as the villain.

Jack’s booming voice brought you out of thought, “I’m still young. I’m still cashing fat checks, and I am still banging the hottest bitch in this entire place.” He said making the crowd applaud as you smiled with a blush appearing on your cheeks. He leaned over a kissed your head. “Now, did we turn on Hook or did everyone turn on us? After all, we’ve done, after everything that we have given to this place and being robbed out of championships, do you expect some entitled, second-generation little prick to dangle his unofficial championship in our faces? A championship that is just like you Hook, a fraud. Unlike your authentic, legitimate, charming, and hot sister.”

Jack gently gave you the mic as the mix of applause and boos poured in. You rolled your eyes at the crowd as you began to talk, “And come to think of it, I should be the FTW champion.” The crowd booed at your statement. “Think about it! I have more in-ring experience, I’ve actually had FTW championship-worthy matches, and I was at one point your role model, little brother. The only reason why I haven’t challenged you is because Dad is protecting your ass. Cause he knows, that in one match I would take your championship, break your bones, and break your heart.”

“As far as I’m concerned, I am the uncrowned FTW Champion. It’s only a matter of time until I get my hands on it and make you pay for all the pain I’ve endured cause I’m the victim here, not you! But soon you will be once I send you to the ICU.” You continued, making the crowd gasp and clap at your words.

You gave the mic back to Jack, “And just for the record, we can hear you all very clearly. You all telling us that we messed up, that Hook’s gonna kill us. Hook, let me tell you something right now, when I get my hands on you, I am going to beat-“

He was cut off by Hook’s theme, making you roll your eyes and Jack’s color drain from his face as your brother emerged from the black stage. You could see his angry face from a mile away, his eyes were filled with rage. As he ran to the ring, Jack slid out of the ring, jumping over the barricade.

Hook slid into the ring to come face-to-face with you, making the crowd stand up in suspense. His eyes kind of softened as he gazed into yours; you could see his eyes go from angry to hurt. He didn’t understand why everything had to escalate to this point. He moved to continue chasing Jack, but you moved in the same direction; shaking your head at him.

You gave your younger brother a dropkick that stunned him. He just laid in the ring. He wasn’t going to get up to fight you, you knew that, he would never fight you, not even when y’all were kids, he never fought you. Maybe it was the respect and love he held for you…or it was fear. Whatever it was, it allowed you to do your finishing move before going to the back.

He deserved it.

Grabbing your bags, you walked to the parking garage, looking for Jack. Then, a voice called out to you.

“That was some show you put on, Princess.” You looked in the direction of the voice, shocked at who it belonged to. You slightly groaned at the person as they exited their vehicle.

“Christian, what do you want?”

“A conversation.” He said with a smile, walking closer to you with Luchasuarus behind him. “Maybe, a little more if I can convince you of it. Where’s your lover boy?”

You know that you’re not supposed to be talking to your boyfriend’s former mentor, but his tone and the conversation thus far intrigued you. “He’s on his way.” You said with confidence.

“No, he’s not princess. He’s long gone, jumped into his truck, and drove off without any stops.” Christian said with a mocking sad face. “That’s no way to treat someone, especially one person that he claims to love.”

“He does love me-“

“Why isn’t he here then?” You were quiet in response, not sure of what to say. “Y/N, you deserve better in multiple ways. I’ll cut straight to the chase. I have a proposition for you, a very beneficial proposition for both of us. But I don’t wanna conduct business with a pretty lady in a dirty garage. Let me, I mean us, take you to your hotel or somewhere to eat, and we can talk.”

Your brain was in the middle as you knew that anything with Christian Cage was bad news. And you don’t wanna disrespect Jack.

But then again, your boyfriend wasn’t around to take you back to your hotel room, you guys really had no plans after turning on Hook besides trying to take his championship (but you didn’t know how really), and you were hungry. Also, there’s no doubt that your brother was hunting you down so the two of you could talk, so you needed to leave now. Technically, it was a winning situation for you.

There was no harm in talking, right?

“Fine Cage, but no funny business.” You said. Christian smiled before telling Luchasuarus to get your bags, which he put in the trunk. Christian opened the door for you and helped you into the truck.

And if there is harm, it’ll catch up to you tomorrow.

[nightowl374art]

how long have you been drawing for and how did you make big steps in progress?

I’ve been drawing since I was little but I started taking art more seriously in my teen years. I had some art books and used those to get going but Fanart was really the thing that got me into improving my skill. First, I spent time redrawing screenshots of my favorite animated characters so I could learn their features and expressions (that helped so much with proportions.) Then I would practice drawing those faces and expressions with pose references. Also, I found that the best way to get better was to follow, be inspired by and watch more experienced artists. YouTube helped me so much, idk what it was but watching other people work gave me insight into things I couldn’t learn on my own. Also, if you can, practice digitally—mistakes are much easier to fix and eventually you learn what works best. I learned most of my skills on a tablet.

But my best advice: Practice. Everyone approaches things differently so what worked for me won’t work for everyone. Practice is truly the only thing that will move you forward. Art takes work. Talent is a thing, but it’s better to approach any pursuit with patience, knowing that anything worth learning will challenge you. Just keep moving forward. I’ve always had a passion for art and honestly that’s all it takes to be an artist. Anyone can do it, it just depends on how serious you are about it. Just keep going even when you’re frustrated. It’ll be worth it.

Also, I know this is cliché, but comparison is literally art cancer. Stay focused on your own thing, you too will find your niche/style and originality is what moves creators forward.

Hope this helps 🤟

[boopiddyboop]

Song Mingi Natal Chart Reading

I’m gonna be honest: I feel like I was all over the place with this one. I don’t know if I did him justice with this write up, but I tried my best. TT.TT

Full Disclaimer: Most of my knowledge is by traditional astrology, which involves but is not limited to: using whole signs, excluding Uranus-Pluto for natal charts, different sign rulers, and different planetary interpretations.  Astrology is subjective by nature; I do not think my way is best, simply that this is the version of interpretation that makes the most sense to me. This is not a professional service, simply a hobby meant for entertainment purposes only.  Feel free to disagree with or question my conclusions.

Placements:

Sun: Leo - 9th house

Moon: Cancer - 8th house

Mercury: Cancer - 8th house

Venus: Virgo - 10th house

Mars: Scorpio - 12th house

Jupiter: Taurus - 6th house

Saturn: Taurus - 6th house

Ascendant: Sagittarius

Midheaven: Libra - 11th house

North Node: Leo - 9th house

Okay, so the birth time is inexact for Mingi because his grandmother (or was it mother?) was superstitious about giving the exact time, and honestly? Smart woman. But, I “around 4 PM” makes him either a Sagittarius Rising or a Cap Rising and I think we can all agree that Mingi as a Capricorn rising is Not It (For comparison, Hongjoong is a Capricorn Rising, and while there are a few similarities between the two, I think it’s safe to say they give off very different vibes). So Sag it is! Making a very cute Jupiter in Taurus his chart ruler. But I don’t want to distract from the leading story of this chart which is NO AIR SIGNS IN THE NATAL PlANETS. NOT ONE. Home boy is emotions and vibes and intuition and instinct, but logic? Balance? No ma’am. Apparently, this is catnip to my air dominant self. Omnomnom.

(These gifs aren't super relevant to the last point, I just wanted to put them somewhere)

Now, before anyone comes at me for implying something about his intellect, I will shortly direct you to his Sun in Leo sitting pleasantly in the 9th house. The Sun in a sign it rules in the benefic house of higher learning, philosophy, travel, and foreign affairs. Especially in Leo, this makes him quite the curious soul. Alas, it is squaring both his Mars in Scorpio and Saturn in Taurus. We’ll jump back to Taurus first.

So, like San, Mingi has both his Jupiter and Saturn in Taurus (Jupiter changes signs about every 13 months, while Saturn sits in a sign for 2.5-3 years.), so it’s almost more surprising that between all the 99 liners, Mingi and San are the only two that share this. They’re not conjunct, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t still fighting here. Jupiter For Mingi, this is in the 6th house- health and employment. So Jupiter is giving him growth and luck in this area, while Saturn brings restriction and strictness. So that’s…complicated. Directly, His Jupiter is squaring his Mercury in Cancer, a rather docile placement for Mercury, while making him have an artistic flair, can lead to him being all in/all out in decision making. His Saturn squares his Sun, which can bring him low self-esteem at times. On the plus side! That Jupiter helps balance that, and also trines his Venus in Virgo, making him quite congenial. Alas, Venus is in its fall sign in Virgo, making him over analyze his relationships, but with it being in the 10th house, it helps bring an artistic flavor to his work. May also benefit in his relationships helping his career.

On the flip side, we have Mingi and two signs in dignity. We’ve got the 3rd Mars in Scorpio of Ateez- I’ve spoken about this before, but of the three (Yunho, San, and Mingi), this is the one causing the most trouble. The 12th house is by nature malefic, and having the sign of fight here brings a lot of restlessness to Mingi. Difficulties expressing anger arise from this, and while his Moon in Cancer  is helping alleviate this with its trine aspect, it leads to him compromising more often than he wants. This Moon placement is already quite domestic, but when it’s in the 8th house, there’s probably a certain amount of safety that Mingi feels in reclusion. 

Usually when I do these write ups, I try to end with a TLDR of what the major points of the chart are, but I gotta say, Mingi’s is a bit all over the place? He’s got a lot of complexities, this guy. I’d say that when it’s good, it’s great for him, but when it rains, it pours. And naturally, that’s why I picked this one as my favorite. (Because I can’t be straightforward about anything JESUS CHRIST)

he's just a cutie ok

[storiesofsung]

TWST HP AU 🪞⚡️ !!

AcexYuuxMalleus

Yuu will be depicted as female in this with she/her pronouns

I’ve been thinking of an AU of this for a while now due to the similarities between each story (magical school of wizards with respective houses of each powerful mage), however as I think more there are even more character similarities some, depending on how you view Yuu

🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞

Golden Trio ⭐️- obviously Ace, Deuce, and Yuu, my favorite trio

Deuce ♠️ - Harry Potter. I can’t connect many similarities between them, but at the same time I can. They’re both boys who love their parents and just try to do the best in what they can, especially since both have been given a second chance to succeed in this magical world. Now, Deuce isn’t perfect but he is trying and is not overtly prone to breaking the rules. He’s sweet, innocent, while still having bite to his bark. A bit clueless at times but with good intentions.

Ace ❤️- Ok now this asshole is perfect for Ron (I’m joking). But honestly his more outlandish personality does have some comparison towards Ron’s sarcastic personality. He’s more on the laid back side whilst still being a valuable friend. (Also they’re both ginger lmao) Plus his relationship with Yuu is more on the chill play fighting side, anyways…

Yuu 🦐 - Hermione, this one can be taken lightly depending on how your version of Yuu is but one thing is for sure: they always get Ace and Deuce out of overblot situations and manage to use some sort of semblance of a brain to figure shit out. However, in my AU let’s say that Yuu too is trying to make a life for themselves by working hard and doing the most they can of their schoolwork. Yuu also being the glue that holds these two idiots together. And honestly her whole schtick as the school therapist now makes sense

Grim 🐱 - Crookshanks. Nothing more to say, just Yuu’s stupid cat (with love)

Also the whole racist thing with Hermione and Yuu could have a connection, since Yuu basically has no magical abilities, yet are able to attend this magical school and work their way up. And because of this, there may be students opposed to Yuu’s magiclessness (mudblood—)

Extra:

Malleus 🐉- Victor Krum, this is slightly stretching it a bit but I can see these two sharing similarities. Malleus and Krum are both exemplary at their respective wizarding sport (Spelldrive, and Quidditch) and are known to be prodigies of it. They don’t have many friends due to being viewed as Gods, Celebrities, etc. in some way and therefore are quite lonely. Attracted to this specific person for not fawning over them and for seeing who they really are, and are able to appreciate their brains for what it’s worth 💚💚

Extra extra:

I totally see the Yule ball sequence happening in the TWST HP au because of these specific lines

❤️: Hoy, Yuu, you’re a girl arent you

🦐: Oh, well spotted

❤️: How about uh you and me go, since we don’t have dates as it is. Don’t wanna show up by ourselves right

🦐: for your information I already have a date *shuts book and walks away*

❤️: What’s got her wand in a knot

♠️: *clueless, spacing out* huh

And malleus totally showing up as yuus secret date AAAA—

🦐: Would you care to join Malleus and I?

❤️: Care to? You’re fraternizing with the enemy

🦐 *irritated*: The point of interhouse games is unity and—

❤️: *rolling eyes* So what

🦐*understanding the situation*: You’ve been rotten the whole evening. Next time there’s a ball, pluck up the courage to ask me before someone else does, and not as a last resort

❤️: Women are scary

🦐: ACE, you’ve spoiled everything.

*cue weeping on the steps*

♠️: 🧍

And in likeliness, Yuu could end up with Malleus, and become the next Queen of Thorn Valley…but it could also take to the more erm in-canon Harry Potter ending cough (do you see where I’m going with this)

“Emotional range of a teaspoon x Nerdy Bookworm “

I love this AU, I could honestly go in so many directions with this AU

🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞⚡️🪞