#Brush Type 4

[supertrainstationh]

About To Leave For Plymouth (Michael McNicholas) by Neil Harvey 156 Via Flickr: 47658 is about to leave Penzance with 2C83 12:00 Penzance to Plymouth. 21/4/87.

[rocceater]

love it when people draw aus differently so some ideas for art styles and designs

ink belongs to comyet fresh belongs to loverofpiggies dream + nightmare belong to joku-blog

[emilylsart]

That Matthew Patel guy sure is EEEEEEEVIL!

A redraw of one of Bryan Lee O'Malley's sketches from a stream that he did the other day!

I was really excited to redraw this one because Matthew's still my favorite evil ex out there in the Scott Pilgrim series lol

(Reblogs > Likes!! Likes also appreciated.)

[pastadoughie]

Whats your opinion on the Shinigami Eyes stuff with people saying the owner is discriminating against transmen and intersex people? Ive seen weird posts circulating from people who are trying to refute it and seem to slip into dodgy things about transmen.

Asking you because youre the most notable transman blogger i follow and I know youve talked about similar things before.

im someone intersex who like grew up veryvery surrounded by radfems &terf ideology as primarily the target (dispite being "afab"), its why i hang out allot in transfem spases becauyse i share alot of expereienses w/ transfems in terms of transmysogeny- & have done a few deconstructions of some terff talking points in the past.

i think 1 ofthe main things abt radfem ideologyy is the urge 2 gatekeep oppression- the idea of oppresion (&more specifically msyogeny) beingg based on "biological sex" (& thereefore the assumption that biologicall sex is always clockable &that everybody posseses a chromcsome dectrector 3000). the ideaa that mysogeny is specific & exlcusive to only women, & that its impossible for a man 2 experience it- is very much a terf idea.

this is whyy terfs hate transwomen so much- because they few them as "biological males" trying 2 "co-opt & silence" the experiences of cis women & their talks aboutt oppresion. TME/TMA stuff is literally the exact same thing but with a different coat of paint.

the thing that peoplee use transmysogeny to describe- is the ideaa that maleness is fundimentally threatening- thatbeing seen as male in a womens space is inharently devientt & predatory. everything u do has to be wateredd down & made nonthreatening- (lest you fall into theirr idea of an evill ew gross disgusting man) so that way you can instead be treated like a stupid whiny bitch woman.- its the simoltanious assignmentt of only the worst traits of both men & women

when you are trans & you are seen as male you are a predator, and when you are seen as female you are stupid & ignorable. when youu are assigned one or both of these roles that is done BY THE BIGOT- for failingg to meet some kindof invisablee line of neatly fitting into one or theother. this is also what people tend to be describing when they sayy transandrophobia- thoughh many of those posts tend to be taken in very bad faith because peoplee (including in discussions of transmysogeny) aree very averse to the idea that being seen as male is not an inharently benifical assignment & also ignore the whole like, mysogeny part of the equasion- that simoltanious assignment.

when you veiww men as inharently powerful & women as powerless then spacess that are designed to be a safe space for people whoare beingg victimized are denied to anybody who meets some unseen standardd of male-ness. you see this alott in feminist & womens groups- but it also extends to things that shouldnt even be gendered in the fuirst place, like rape crisis lines & shelters.

alot ofthe wholee transmasc vs transfem discourse just comesdown to wantingg to gatekeep the experiense of transmysogeny- & as with all gender & bioessentialism this means thatt intersex people have to also deal with significantley more hostility even in the communities thatshould argueabley be the most accepting twards us-

shingami eyes is runn by a transwoman that has alottof these terfy beliefs and as alwaysthis means sliding into extremelyy blatent intersexism- posts thatare advocateing against nonconsentual medicall procedures againnst intersex people have gotten them marked as "anti trans". i shouldntt need to tell youhow thats fucked.

ive had to live in radfem spacess myself & i reallyreally hate seeing people radicallised like this because i know how it happens- there is an infinite pool to pull from of disgustingg instances of mysogenistic violence & so its extremely easyy to construct the narative that you as the woman aree always the innocent victim of oppression & all of the evill disgusting sexist males are yourr enemy- & that the only way to ever be safe is to isolate yourselff amongst only the women that agree with you!!

its a trick that usess all of the disgustingg acts of transphobia &mysogeny to isolate you- thesee spaces curatee an experiense where u only ever see the worst of what men (or people terfs veiw as men) have to offer- a trickk that ultimately makes your situation worse- because by not existing aroundd people who meet your standardd of "male-ness" whatever that is- you get a very very false perseption

this is also whyy radfem ideologyy is so prevelant on woman-on-woman violence & grooming- because it scaress a victim into thinking that THEY are the only safe person in the world, that there is no escape, that whatever is happening to you will get 298729x worse if you even TRY to leave. without eleaborating- this is how the majorrity of my experiense with CSA happened. because i believed that telling anybody would subjecct me to worse, and that my abusers fundimentally "had my best intrest" just by virtue of their gender-

anybody who tries to isolate you is a fuckin fed, we all aree stuckk in the transsexual tarr pit, puppies &kitties friends 4ever.

[icewindandboringhorror]

More misc. daily life pictures and such

[uss-sonder]

Portrait I made of Saharin Exlar.

[empyreanmirror]

OK I have to know what program or brushes you use?? Whenever I try to paint digitally the edges look too soft if that makes sense??

Hello! i've a fair idea of what style specifically you mean, but let me know if I didnt cover what you're asking about!

I mainly use Clip Studio Paint (Pro 1.0?), on the side I use Rebelle 7 Pro. Rebelle is for the traditional looking stuff I occasionally do, and everything i used for that comes with the programme. If what youre looking at is traditional-mimicking, its that! Other than that, probably CSP youre here for so... for that:

Main brushes? I use a collection of Daub brushes! Pretty much exclusively this brush... like... outside my sketch brush I basically only use this one:

Rectangular, textured. This is how it came Im pretty sure, but just showing you the shape and stuff because the shape i find is key in cutting lines into paintings. I dont remember which daub pack its in, but I can try and figure it out if you want it!

You can see it here in these pieces, it gives that fuzzy frayed end to things. That's genuinely fine? I find it's good for making sure shadows and edges aren't too defined without giving the very artificial digital art feeling airbrushes give, like as an example I dont really notice it in this piece at full size but it's very distracting zoomed in:

I just. am not liking it personally, which... I tell you to let you know I actually kinda struggle to get it to work the job I want it to and ive been looking to replace it. Used it for years, but it has flaws. It's been decent for my recent couple years break from serious art because its loose and gets the job done, but its kinda tough to work with (as any traditional-mimicking brush would be)

I've recently started using it edited a little to get rid of the fuzzy texture, which really just involved taking away the texture in settings. Theres some places on the arms here where i was using the textured version, and... yeah this is roughly rendered bc it was a quick piece but you get the idea:

I find it really helpful because it has an edge - it can paint proper lines - but then can be smoothed

Rough textured vs untextured, and heres.. where you can see it falls apart for what i do. That was solid black I was painting on the grey and i was pushing hard (more so going over and over it), textured version's way better for painting and blending but texture gets in the way, uh, trade off

It's definitely... not actually ideal for my art, I can say that much. i took a detour into using this brush exclusively after losing my last muse, it's definitely.... how do i word this. its not good at laying down colours and blending - Ive been hoping i can even that out in settings so maybe if you grab it you can iron that out but. Thats what I use!

It's probably more helpful to tell you what works? Uh. given that the brush i use I struggle against so

For things getting back to the style I used before - which. unfortunately i dont think i have current (relatively) sfw examples, so time to dig up the literal at the time old style art.... - for example in this:

deviantarts quality is fucking abysmal holy shit. This is kinda... What my personal style is, which is blending stark lines and colours, juxtaposing textures and stuff. To do that? I recommend having two brushes, something like what I just showed you and then something like Clip Studio Paint's default watercolour brushes. Theyre like airbrushes blended with paint brushes

I also then go over things with my pen tool, which is my own brush. I dont know if i can properly share it in any capacity because I cant remember where I got the textures from, but you know, under the table passed along, its here, its meant to mimic how i draw with pens on paper (light and almost invisible if you go light and fast, proper linework if you slow down and purposely draw)

You can see the whole entourage (Daub brush, watercolour brushes, pen brushes, if watercolours were even used) here:

Didnt circle everything that was pen because Im sure you get the idea. Its basically just... that brush to paint, waters if i need to smooth something extra smooth, and then anything that needs contrast and oomf gets added in pen, if your brushes cant provide edges its probably best to mix them up, use your soft brush for blending, a harder painting brush for laying down colours and loose blending.

Something that lays down paints with an edge - I really do recommend a non-round brush head, and something built for painting - and then something to smooth it out.... honestly ideally thatd be the exact same brush, thats a key i used to like with the Daub square brush is that i could paint and blend with it, I think I maybe manipulated the settings too much and took it way too far out of what it was or something because i swear it used to be easier to work with but. whatever the issue is its never been ideal, honestly for a brush id say seek out something that: Is square/rectangular (probably rectangular is best); lays down paint without too much pressure on your wrist and blends smoothly so you're laying paint and blending in the same stroke; puts down colour when you're pressing down over a certain percentage of its pressure limit and then only blends when you're pressing under that percentage. CSP lets you do this. Best brush experiences Ive had ticked all of those boxes

uh. if youre shopping around (buying or getting for free) you dont need to look for the "paints over x blends under y" because in CSP and other programmes (do check) you can add that in yourself, but yeah Id suggest some kind of shaped brush that isnt shy with paint to combat the soft edges!

[b4kuch1n]

so sorry if this is an annoying question, but what brush do you use for lineart? the soft, crunchiness of it compliments your style so so much...

it's not annoying at all! I do fully recognise that the specific brushes I use to draw contribute hugely to my process, least of all because they have a certain kinetic "feeling" to roll out onto the canvas lol. this is the brush I currently use to ink!

it's a lot less 'textured' and much softer than my previous inking brush, but just as hard to magic wand when I need to color in lol. the SAI textures and brushmaps I have on this setup can be found over here - the person who originally made them was on deviantArt but has deleted their account a long time ago, and I still haven't been able to find them again 😔

[nomaishuttle]

ohhh fml i was like maybe i cn stya up a bit late after all its weekend tomorrow. no it fucking isnt today was thursday i have work tmrw everything is evil always

[kayvsworld]

i keep trying to use new brushes and Branch Out and Vary Up The Art Situation but i CANT. i am fucking incapable. i am locked into using this dumb brush i made out of a rectangle at 4am like 5 years ago i simply do not enjoy using anything else

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

This is the most expensive paint I own now

[bigender-cowboy]

I HATE DOCTORS WHYYYYY NO NO NO GUYS WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS YOU’RE QUITE LITERALLY PAID TO MAKE SURE IM OKAY WHYYY

[girlwithrituals]

GLOW UP GUIDE FOR 2025⠀

READ: On average, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact. And considering that 2025 is precisely these many days away, why not start with our glow up plan already?

Physical Glow Up-

BODY

— 5-10K steps a day.

— 7-8 hours of sleep.

— workout everyday for 1 hr atleast- yoga/stretching/pilates/cardio/lifting weights. a workout may take one hour, but your mood will be boosted for the next 12 hours.

— posture training.

— sunlight exposure after waking up for at least 10 minutes.

NUTRITION

— 2-3 liters of water every day.

— limit your caffeine intake.

— avoid sugars as much as you can.

— high protein diet, pre and probiotics.

— more fruits and veggies (+ green smoothies if you like).

— no junk/processed food/trans fat.

— no eating after 8 pm.

SKINCARE

— be clear on your skin type (oily, dry, combination, sensitive).

— once you're clear, use these accordingly- cleanser, toner, targeted serum, eye cream, moisturizer, sunscreen (≥50 spf).

— keep your bedding clean as well.

— no picking of skin on your lips, cuticle etc.

— gua sha to help improve blood circulation and lessen toxins.

— cold therapy may take three to five minutes of being uncomfortable, but your energy levels will be boosted for the rest of the day.

— remove makeup before you go to bed.

BODY CARE

— shower every day.

— exfoliate 2x a week.

— use body lotion (shea butter/aloe vera gel/coconut oil).

HAIR CARE

— wash hair 2-3x a week

— oil your scalp 2x a week, at least 3 hours before shampoo.

— hair mask 1x per week.

— never brush wet hair.

— use silk pillow case.

HYGIENE

— brush your teeth 2x a day, clean tongue and the roof of the mouth daily.

— floss daily.

— cut your nails 1x a week, never remove the cuticles.

— glycolic acid under arm for odor and discoloration.

— never use soap on your coochie.

Mental Glow Up-

MINDSET

— set clear goals- define and breakdown your aspirations.

— start your mornings with positive affirmations.

— surround yourself with uplifting content and people.

— be shamelessly selfish to your career and mental health, remove anyone or anything that doesn't align with your priorities and wellbeing.

— boost your brain health by these 4 neuroscience tools:

difficult first: start your day with the most difficult task (cortisol and dopamine are high in the body meaning that your body/mind is primed to work).

rest your eyes: introduce a micro-pause after learning by resting/closing your eyes - will help retain information better.

tomorrow's worries: write tomorrow's to-do list before bed as it is proven to be effective in helping you fall asleep.

find time to play: engage in low-stake play. can be anything you find fun but where the outcome doesn't matter (induces neuroplasticity + reduces stress).

MIND

— meditation might take as low as ten minutes, but your focus will be improved for the rest of the day.

— no social media after waking up and at least an hour before bed.

— keep aside 1 hr of time to read daily! reading a new book may take five hours, but you will keep the knowledge forever.

— journaling, gratitude.

— digital detox once a week or for 12 hours.

— limit unnecessary screentime, unfollow or cut off people you don't want to see.

JOURNALING

— choose a regular time each day to journal, making it a part of your routine.

— find a quiet, comfortable place free from distractions. light a candle if you want.

— allow your thoughts to flow without censoring or editing.

— write about your feelings and emotions to understand them better. write about things you are thankful for to boost your mood. write about your short-term and long-term goals. identify what triggers certain emotions or reactions

— set a timer for 5-10 minutes and write continuously during that time.

— reflect on both positive experiences and challenges.

— make lists, journal your thoughts on these questions.

— journal at night to clear your mind before bedtime, because emotions and thoughts lose their power once we acknowledge them.

— a gratitude practice may take five minutes, but your mindset will be shifted for the rest of the day.

AFFIRMATIONS

— customise affirmations to your needs.

Personal Life-

WEEKLY TASKS

— initiate small changes: begin with small, manageable tasks such as making your bed or cleaning your room every sunday.

— celebrate your success: reward yourself when you achieve your goals or have a consistently productive week. consider treats like buying flowers for yourself or watching your favorite show.

DAILY WORK

— set achievable goals: establish realistic goals for the day, week, or month ahead.

— track your progress.

— organise your work space, declutter your shelves etc.

— embrace the power of lists: keep a list of tasks to be done and their deadlines. this way, you start each day with a clear plan. to make it visually appealing and motivating, consider using productivity apps like evernote, habit tracker, or notion.

PRODUCTIVITY TIPS

— wake up early.

— plan ahead everything, do scheduling. you can use:

google calendar / notion / tasks .

— if the task takes less than 2 minutes to finish, do it immediately.

— countdown rule, if you are procrastinating, count 1-2-3-4-5 and jump.

— start slow, don't rush and try to do everything at one time.

— follow a proper routine, use app locks based on screentime.

— pomodoro technique, 25 min work, and 5 min break.

— schedule longer break times as well e.g 30 min nap.

[shrimpybbq]

season 4 pt1 with rafe, high school gf and their son!

rafe and high school gf who spread his dad’s ashes together. they’re on rafe’s boat together as he spreads the ashes, her arms wrapped around his waist comfortingly. he wouldn’t want anyone else to be with him for this moment

rafe is pretty content with hiring a babysitter to look after the kids when he wants to spend some time alone with his girl, and when he decides to compete at the enduro, he deems the day kid-free. no one would think the couple had two kids and a house together as they stood together on the beach, her hands brushing tenderly against the nape of rafe’s neck as he sat on his bike.

“You’ve got this baby, you know that? It’ll be a piece of cake,” she said, her voice quiet. This was a moment between the two of them, and no one else needed to hear. Rafe still disliked sharing intimate moments in public brazenly, but he still needed reassurance and love.

He nodded, bringing her closer to him as he placed a quick kiss against her lips. “I’m gonna win this for you, baby.”

rafe absolutely adores when he gets to bring his smokin’ hot wife out with him to the events on figure 8. he loves to let his girl get dressed up and all pretty (for him), knowing she sometimes felt frumpy after looking after their kids all day. they’re at the club when rafe starts yelling at a random girl, enraged by her comment about his dad. his wife now having to drag him away with the help of topper, her hands soothing over his chest to try and distract him. it had been really hard for him since his dad died, and he swore he’d only survived bc of his wife and kids.

the couple are at the club they frequent together when hollis speaks to rafe, who after their conversation was no longer paying attention to the older woman, instead focusing on the girl he suddenly tucked under his arm

“And who is this?”

“This is my wife,” Rafe said with a smirk, his arm wrapping around his girls shoulders, placing a quick kiss to the top of her head. At that, the older woman’s smile dropped minutely, quickly excusing herself.

“Who was she, baby?” His wife asked, watching as Rafe turned the business card over in his hand.

“Uhh.. the biggest realtor/cougar on the island.”

“Oh ok, sounds like just your type, huh?”

“Baby, nonono, why would I want a cougar when I have the hottest milf standing in front of me?”

Rafe shielded himself from her playful swats as she came closer, his arms wrapping around his wife’s frame easily and lifting her off the ground.

“Come on baby, you know you’re the only one I want.”

rafe talks about his business deals with his wife often, her lounging on the pool chair as he vents his frustrations. he felt she was the only person he could tell everything to, and she would provide him with advice and solutions that actually helped, not just telling him what he wanted to hear

their son is resting on the other pool chair, exhausted after playing in the pool for hours with his mother and father, whilst their daughter rested on her mother’s chest, sleeping after being fed

rafe feels all of his frustrations slip away when he’s with his children - their innocence and happiness making him feel much lighter

girl dad rafe! he loves charlie but there’s something about his little girl who looks so much like her mother, who adores him and always outstretches her chubby little fingers towards him, that makes rafe’s heart melt

he spoils his little girl more than he should, buying her all the little dresses and shoes and accessories a baby could ever need

rafe who asks his wife to teach him to braid so he can practice for when she’s older!!!!!

girl dad rafe training charlie to be protective over his sister and make sure he’s always by her side

rafe had been addicted to coke, and while he’d managed to give it up, he had replaced the coke with alcohol. high school gf notices and does her best to reduce his intake, but truthfully, after seeing how difficult is was for rafe to stop the coke, she knew that this was probably the best she would get for a while. still, he doesn’t escape without a raised eyebrow when he goes to get another drink from the fridge

topper who knows never to talk bad about rafe’s girl - EVER. he made that mistake once and lived to regret it, having to lie to his parents that he fell from his bike. topper actually likes her now, and he gave himself the title of uncle topper to the cameron kids

as a husband, rafe is so handsy in public. he doesn’t care what people think about him anymore, so he lets himself squeeze and touch as much as he wants

beach time bby! i feel like honestly, rafe doesn’t like bringing his kids around the drunken kooks. they’re rowdy and rude, and rafe is trying to be better

so instead, he loves to take the family down to their private stretch of beach adjacent to the house, and relax and play with the kids. it’s so peaceful to him, and he truly feels content with his life in those moments. he’s got his hot as shit wife in a little bikini with their daughter tucked in her side, and little charlie is climbing all over rafe as he tries to get his father to throw him in the water again

oh he 100% helps his wife pick out her bikini that day, tying the tie for her, his hands roaming a little too much as she giggles in front of him

she had told him once that she felt insecure after having their children, her body a little different than it used to be. truth be told, rafe loved it. every time he looked at her body naked, fucked her or held her in his arms, he was reminded that she brought their children into the world. she gave him purpose and love

(he also likes that her tits are bigger from breastfeeding and loves to squeeze them whenever he can)

rafe is such a good dad bc he puts everything he has into being there for his children. they’re his entire world and everyone can see it

still, he needs frequent reassurance that he is nothing like the father his dad was, instead, he cares and nurtures his children

rafe discusses his plans to make amends with sarah with his wife, and she gives him strategies to try and talk to her (not that he tends to take them), but she also misses sarah

charlie who still asks for his aunty every now and then, making his mothers heart break. sarah hasn’t even met their daughter yet :(

when he makes the decision to do the deal with hollis, he does it for his family. he wants to look after them, and this deal would do that for them.

but when she hits on him, sensually touching his hand, he makes his priorities clear to the woman as he scoffs, pulling away from her

“I’m married…. And you know that - you even met her. I’m doing this deal for her, and for our family, so….”

rafe has problems but that man is so loyal, he actually couldn’t ever imagine wanting anyone else. he fought so hard and went through so much to keep his high school gf by his side and now he feels that she is the only person in the world who understands him fully. in his mind, it’s them against the world

click here for pre-season 1 rafe, gf & their unborn son

click here for season 1 rafe, gf & their son

click here for season 2 rafe, gf & their son

click here for season 3 rafe, gf & their son

click here for the 18 month gap before season 4 rafe, gf & their son

[yjhzies]

“Come back, please.” — JWW

⸝⸝୭ ˚. fluff . est relation . cute

⋆ pairings : wonwoo x gn!reader ⋆ warning : none! (I hope so) ⋆ wc : 0.6k [✉️] · Your bf claims to have missed you alot, not wanting you to leave his side.

⋆ - note : UGH I love the thought of a clingy Wonwoo 😽😽 he would be so pookie coded | tysm @arkynz 4 the req!! <3

You were up a lot earlier than usual, and didn't want to wake Wonwoo up because he had just come back from a tour yesterday. So you decided to visit the corner shop that newly opened nearby your shared apartment. The advertisements were pretty good and you wanted to check it out yourself.

Just as you were looking at what to buy, the phone in your hand rang with a notification - Wonwoo texted you. You weren't expecting him to be awake so early, especially after he kept mumbling how exhausted he was while resting in your embrace yesterday.

[Today · 8:23 AM]

Wonuu 🎀 : where did you go

Wonuu 🎀 : you're not here?

You smiled, sliding your fingers on the keyboard, typing a response.

You : I'm out in the corner shop baby

You : I thought you'd sleep in today

Your phone rang again - he immediately replied.

Wonuu 🎀 : come back

Wonuu 🎀 : please :(

Just when you were about to reply, your phone started to ring - he was calling.

"Baby," he called out, his voice groggy with sleep. "Why did you leave..."

"I thought you'd sleep for some time," you responded, paying for the food you bought as you made your way out of the store. "I'm coming, okay?"

"Please, come fast," he mumbled, and you could hear the pout in his voice. Silence soon followed after.

This wasn't how Wonwoo was usually. He didn't mind you waking up before him, going to the shop without telling him or leaving him alone at home while he was sleeping - but since yesterday, he had been clingy. Refusing to let go of you as he held you tight and buried his face into your neck. He did tell you a thousand times that he missed you, a lot, but you didn't think to this extent.

You, of course, didn't mind.

You carefully opened the front door, walking in and placing the food boxes on the table. The house was unusually quiet - quiet like when one of you was sleeping or either not here.

As you made your way to your shared bedroom, you found Wonwoo buried in his blanket, cheek squished by the pillow he was resting his head on, his eyes tightly shut. His face was a light shade of pink, and as you walked closer to him, you felt the warmth radiating off his body.

"Wonu?" You softly called out, careful not to startle him. You sat on his side of the bed - as he was sleeping on yours - and gently brushed the hair strands away from his face. His cheeks were warm, and you could tell he had been under the blankets for some time.

The small act made him shift a little, making you notice his phone was still in his hand.

You carefully slide it out of his grip, placing it on the nightstand.

"Baby-" Wonwoo suddenly mumbled, opening his eyes slowly. He stretched his arms, reaching out to you.

"Did I wake you up? Sorry," you whisper, scooting closer to him.

He shook his head, making his hair messier in the process, and gently wrapped his arms around your waist in a loose grip.

Wonwoo mumbled something under his breath that sounded like 'lay down with me', and you didn't wait for him to repeat it as you adjusted yourself next to him.

He smiled with his eyes closed, snuggling closer to comfortably rest his head on your chest. He gently took your hand and placed it on his head, silently telling you to caress it.

"Don't leave me alone next time,"

"Did you miss me that much?"

"Hm, I did..."

His soft heatbeats matched with yours as he quietly dozed off in the warmth of your embrace. Maybe you liked this side of your boyfriend the most. Maybe you liked the way he thought of every way to be by your side at all times.

[goldfades]

𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐌𝐄? ─ PB⁵

౨ৎ ─ summary | request -> "Omg a fic where Paige and reader have always had this sort of sarcastic bickering borderline mean type of relationship/rivalry but one day the tension suddenly just goes from competitive to sexual and thennnnm ykkkk"

─ word count | 3.7k

─ warnings | NSFW under the cut, read at your own discretion! whoo, where do i begin???? paige/reader being a fucking ASSES (like super mean) and lots of insecurity, cc mention and comparison (pls don't come 4 me it's for the plot!!!!!! i didnt mean it!!!!), lots of arguing and fighting, mean!paige (like.... im talking MEAN), fingering (r receiving), so much dirty talk, idk if i missed anything lmk

─ ev's notes | the chokehold the pic in the middle has on me IS INSANE, also finishing a smut at 11 am should be a crime 😭 (but i’m feeding yall so be grateful)

THE GAME COULDN'T have gone worse.

The opposing team seemed to effortlessly dominate every aspect of the game. Shots that normally found their mark clanked off the rim, passes were intercepted with unnerving frequency, and the defense resembled more of a sieve than a fortress. Your entire team was quiet in the locker-room and Geno had told them that they needed the night to regroup, and they'll talk about it when they got home.

You made your way upstairs with Azzi and Aubrey, both trying their best to make you feel better. You played like shit, plain and simple and despite what your teammates were telling you, it was true.

You couldn't shake off the feeling of letting your team down. In the game, you were a shadow of your usual self. Your shots seemed to lack both the usual power and precision. Your attempts to drive to the basket were easily thrown by their defense, leaving you frustrated and angry.

Even your usually reliable defense broke under the pressure. You found yourself out of position more often than not, leaving gaping holes for the opposing team to exploit. Your reactions were slow, your movements sluggish, as if your body refused to respond to the commands of your mind.

"Hey," Azzi grabbed your arm so that you could meet her gaze. "We win and lose as a team, alright? This isn't all on you, we all played like shit tonight."

"But we always come back, Y/N." Aubrey added as you met her gaze as well. Their words would've made you feel better if this wasn't the worst you'd played all season, maybe even your entire college career.

You didn't bother to respond, you stayed quiet as you walked in your Azzi's hotel room and in there was Nika and Paige. They were seated on the bed, Nika looking more defeated than Paige, she looked more pissed than anything.

Paige didn't even acknowledge you as you walked in as she greeted Azzi and Aubrey, but you didn't even care right now. You were not in the mood for her shit, not after the game you just played tonight.

You sank into a chair in the corner of the room, the weight of the defeat pressing down on you like a leaden blanket. Nika's defeated expression mirrored your own feelings, while Paige's indifference grated on your already frayed nerves.

You listened as Azzi and Aubrey exchanged small talk with Nika and Paige, their voices a distant murmur in the back of your mind. But you couldn't bring yourself to join in the conversation, couldn't muster the energy to plaster on a fake smile and pretend that everything was okay.

Instead, you sat in silence, lost in your own thoughts. The events of the game replayed in your mind like a nightmare, each mistake magnified in the harsh light of hindsight. You wanted nothing more than to forget about the game, to push it to the back of your mind and move on, but the sting of defeat lingered like a stubborn stain.

"You okay, babe?" Nika's voice rang out as you got pulled back into reality. All the girls attention was now on you, feeling a bit self-conscious.

You forced a weak smile, attempting to brush off Nika's concern. "Yeah, just... processing everything, you know?" Your voice sounded hollow, even to your own ears.

"What's going on?" Nika asked, the concern evident in her face. "Talk to us, please, Y/N."

Nika knew how hard you were on yourself, she had seen you weather victories and defeats alike, always striving for perfection. Her gentle prodding encouraged you to open up, even if it meant admitting your own vulnerabilities.

"I played like shit," was all you could get out as you leaned forward, feeling their gaze on you. "I don't know what was so different about tonight but I just felt like the weight of the entire team was on my back and I didn't know I was carrying it until the end, and I just crumbled to the pressure."

"We all have our moments, Y/N." Azzi spoke up, empathy evident in her expression. But before anyone else could respond, Paige scoffed as she met your gaze.

"Carried the team? We all did what we could tonight and we don't need your shit." Paige's voice dripped with contempt, her words like a slap in the face.

You felt a surge of anger rising within you, fueled by the frustration of the game and now mixed by Paige's bitter words. How dare she dismiss your struggles so callously?

"What's your fucking issue, Paige?" you retorted, your voice tinged with frustration.

Paige's eyes narrowed as she glared at you. "My issue? Maybe if you didn't choke every time the pressure was on, we wouldn't be in this mess," she shot back, her words cutting like a knife. "You're always making excuses for yourself, Y/N."

You scoffed, getting up from the chair to glare at her. "I'm not making excuses, I'm acknowledging reality. We all had a bad game, Paige. It's not like you were lighting it up out there either."

"I did better than you, that's for fucking sure." Paige's voice came out bitter as you felt yourself let out a quiet scoff. You couldn't fight with her anymore, you were exhausted, both mentally and physically.

"Guys, stop it." Azzi's voice cut through the tension like a knife but neither of you acknowledged her, you both just kept glaring at each other.

"You're a bitch, Paige. You're just jealous because at the end of the day, you're just a burnt out star who can't handle not being in the spotlight anymore. Sorry that Caitlin's out there doing better than you, and that you feel the need to be a fucking ass all the time," you retorted, your words dripping with venom.

The frustration of the game, mixed with years of simmering animosity, boiled over into this heated argument that neither of you seemed willing to back down from. You didn't know why you brought up Caitlin, but all you knew was that you'd definitely get a reaction.

Paige's eyes flashed with anger, her jaw tightening as she glared up at you. "The fuck you have to bring Caitlin into this? At least I was a star, you'll never make into the WNBA with that attitude, I promise you that. You're just a selfish brat who can't handle criticism-"

"Hey!" Nika's shout rang out as she glanced in between the two of you. "One more word from either of you and I'm telling Geno, you guys are teammates and you need to act like it."

You glanced at Nika, seeing the disappointment etched on her face, and then back at Paige. Despite the rivalry between you, you knew that Nika was right ─ however, you weren't quite ready to admit that.

You scoffed as you exhaled, feeling everyone's eyes on you. You didn't acknowledge any of them as you left the hotel room, feeling your eyes burn with unshed tears. You were embarrassed, Paige had always been hard on you for seemingly no good reason but it's never gotten this bad.

You two had always been good sports, even when the other played like shit. She never brought anything up that would actually hurt your feelings, unlike tonight. You didn't know why, you tried to think back at what could've changed tonight but came up with nothing that made sense. You just hoped it wouldn't affect the way you played with her, you didn't want it to effect the team more than it has.

You walked into your hotel room, locking the door behind you as you walked into the bathroom, ready for a warm shower to drown out the rest of the world.

──

"Who is it?" You asked as you heard the knocking on the door. It was nearing two in the morning and you had just stepped out of the much-needed shower, clad only in your robe.

"It's me," Paige's voice was quiet as she spoke, your whole body tensing up just at the sound. You sighed deeply as you walked up to the door, opening it to reveal a slightly disheveled Paige.

She looked really, really good; she had her hair up in a loose bun, her gray sweats were slightly rolling off her hips and her shirt fit her just perfectly. Goddamnit, Y/N ─ focus. You tried to hide the tug of attraction you felt towards Paige, pushing the distracting thoughts aside as you met her gaze.

"What do you want?" you asked, your tone guarded as you leaned against the doorframe.

"Let me come in," Paige's statement didn't come off as a question, more like a demand. You sighed and leaned backward so that she could enter.

Before you could say anything, Paige started talking. "I don't appreciate you comparing me to Caitlin, especially after the season I had."

You scoffed in disbelief as you closed the door. "You came in here just to say that?"

Paige turned so she could send you a glare. "I came in originally cause I was gonna apologize. But then I remembered the whole Caitlin thing-"

"What's up with you and Caitlin?" Your words came out with the same intensity as hers did. "I don't know why you took that comment to heart because you started this whole damn thing."

Paige's expression hardened, a defensive edge creeping into her demeanor. "What do you mean by that?" she snapped, her tone sharp with irritation. "I had the most terrible season, and everyone has been comparing me to her-"

You felt a surge of frustration rising within you, the tension between you and Paige reaching a boiling point. "And what about everything I've been through this season?" you shot back, your voice tinged with anger. "You think this season has been a cakewalk for me? You think I don't know what it's like to struggle?"

Paige's jaw clenched, her gaze hardening as she met yours head-on. "This isn't about that," she retorted, her voice low and tense. "This is about you and Caitlin suddenly being all buddy-buddy after the Iowa game. The comments under your posts, the calling and the texting. It's obsessive and annoying, I don't like it and I don't want you hanging around her anymore."

You paused for a second, trying to process her words. Paige's accusation caught you off guard, the weight of her words sinking in like a lead weight in your chest. Was she jealous? You couldn't help but let out a small laugh as Paige's eyebrows furrowed.

"The fuck you laughing for? You think this is funny?" Paige's eyebrows furrowed even further, her frustration palpable as she waited for your response.

"Aww, are you jealous?" Your words came out amused as Paige kept glaring at you. "I'm not replacing you or the team, she has a boyfriend."

"I'm not jealous," Paige's glare intensified, her jaw tightening with frustration at your teasing remark. "Don't flatter yourself, Y/N. I couldn't care less about your little fling with Caitlin."

"Then what's your problem?" you pressed, unable to resist the urge to push her buttons further. "If it's not jealousy, then why are you so worked up about it?"

Paige's nostrils flared slightly as she averted her gaze for a moment, before looking back up at you. "Cause it's no damn comparison. At the end of the day, you're on my team and you're mine," she paused as she shook her head. "My friend," she quickly clarified.

You blinked in surprise at Paige's sudden intensity, the weight of her words sinking in like a heavy anchor. The possessiveness in her tone left you feeling flustered, unsure of how to respond.

"Paige..." you began, your voice trailing off as you struggled to find the right words. But before you could even process anything, her lips were on yours and your back was pushed up against the wall.

Instinctively, your arms found their way around her shoulders, pulling her closer as you responded to her kiss with equal fervor. The heat of the moment consumed you, erasing any doubts or reservations as you lost yourself in the sensation of her lips on yours.

Her lips on yours sent a shiver down your spine, electrifying every nerve in your body as you surrendered to the passion that consumed you. All thoughts of the past were forgotten as you gave yourself over to the intoxicating enticement of Paige's lips.

Her hands slide up your body and hold your neck as you let out a soft whimper, causing your head to fall back against the wall. Paige's lips began leaving open-mouthed kisses all over your jaw and neck, as her hands explore your body.

This couldn't be happening, you kept thinking to yourself. After playing on the same team as Paige for almost three years now, it felt like this was a fever dream ─ but you didn't mind it, not at all.

Her lips found yours again, kissing you roughly as your hands gripped her head. With ease, she lifted you up into her arms, your weight feeling insignificant against her strength. She kept her lips on yours as she carried you toward the bed, dropping you swiftly as your hands found her face.

Paige's hands had easy access to your body due the robe, that she quickly slid off as her lips stayed on yours. She pulled away for a second, breathless, as she took in your body with admiration in her gaze. You felt self-conscious for a moment, but you had no time to dwell on it as Paige pulled you down on the bed.

"You're fucking gorgeous," she mumbled as she pressed kisses all over your neck. "I hate how gorgeous you are."

Your mind was a whirlwind of conflicting emotions as Paige's words and actions washed over you. Part of you wanted to resist, to question the sudden intensity of this moment, but another part of you couldn't deny the undeniable chemistry between you and Paige.

But as her lips trailed along your neck, you found yourself unable to resist the pull any longer. With each kiss, each touch, you felt yourself unraveling, giving in to the utter need that surged through your body.

"I hate how you make me feel," Paige whispered against your skin, her voice husky with desire. "Every time I'm near you, it's like I lose control. Like I can't think straight."

Her words sent a shiver down your spine, igniting a fire within you that burned brighter with each moment. You reached up to cup her face, guiding her lips back to yours in a desperate kiss, hungry for the taste of her against your skin.

You reached out to her, your fingers tangling in her hair as you pulled her closer, unable to resist the magnetic pull that drew you together. "I hate how much I want you," Paige groaned, her voice tinged with frustration as she pressed her lips against your neck with force, pulling a soft whimper from your lips.

"I hate how much I need you," Paige spoke as she gazed into your eyes, her grip tightening on your waist as she pulled you closer. "But I'm not gonna fight it anymore. I'm done pretending like I don't want you, okay?"

You felt a rush of heat flood through you at her confession swirling in the pit of your stomach. In that moment, all you could think about was Paige completely, letting her consume you with her passion and desire.

"I want you, too, P." You finally let out, your voice quivering as she began to caress your thigh.

Paige scoffed, shaking her head at your words. "I know, I know you do."

She pushed her lips into yours again, a needy moan escaping your lips as she pushed you onto the bed. She straddled your hips as she kissed all over your neck, feeling yourself pulsate beneath her. You couldn't even think straight anymore, your mind was complete mush as she kept kissing all over your neck and jaw.

Paige mouth traveled down toward your stomach, leaving sloppy kisses and hickeys all over it. Your hands found her blonde hair, tugging as she teased you. Her blue eyes were completely focused on you, every reaction and every sound that you made, fueling her desire even further. With each kiss, each touch, she seemed determined to leave her mark on you, to brand you as hers in every way possible.

And you welcomed it, craving the intensity like a starving soul. With each tug of your fingers in her hair, Paige responded with a groan of satisfaction, her lips and tongue leaving a trail of fire across your skin.

She pried open your legs slowly, her gaze still lingering as your breath hitched. "Fuck," she mumbled as her eyes flickered toward your soaking cunt ─ she was at a loss for words.

Paige fingers teased your entrance, pulling needy whimpers from your bruised lips. "You're so wet for me, baby," she finally plunged a finger into you, causing a borderline pornographic moan to leave your mouth.

Every sensation was heightened, every touch sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body as she thrusted her finger in and out of you. She wasn't gentle by any means, you could practically feel the anger radiating from her body as she watched you.

You leaned further into the bed, covering your face with your arms as a string of moans left your mouth. Almost immediately, Paige gripped your arm and pulled it off of your face. "I want you to look at me while I fuck you, alright?"

You couldn't reply with any words, you weren't even sure you were conscious at this point ─ the exhaustion from the game, the anger from the earlier argument and now the utter pleasure of you were feeling was fogging up your brain, you couldn't even think straight anymore; all you could do was sit there and take it.

You tried your best to keep your eyes on her, but you felt yourself slipping as you arch your back. She added another finger, causing a new sensation jolting down your body ─ you hadn't even orgasmed yet and you feel beyond overstimulated.

"Does Caitlin do this better than me, huh?" She mumbled as she leaned forward to press a sloppy kiss to yours lips. "Fucking answer me," she groaned as she pulled away.

You shook your head fervently, the only words you were really understanding were "Caitlin" and "better". Her movements became faster and deeper with your answer, causing another loud moan to slip out of your lips.

"Fuck, please," you cried out as you leaned back into the bed. Paige quickly pulled you down by your hips, making sure to pin you down as she continued to finger-fuck you. "Please,"

"So polite, baby. Fucking three years, it took me three years to realize that they only thing you needed was a good fuck for you to be nice, huh?" She spoke harshly as she felt you tighten around her fingers, your face contorting into utter pleasure as you shut your eyes. "Now I know whenever I need you to shut up, all I need to do is fuck you, right baby?"

Her words all blurred in your mind as she began rubbing your clit, and you were cumming all over her fingers ─ the knot snapped hard, you were crying out so loudly, Paige was worried the neighbor's were gonna call the office.

She helped you ride your high as you caught your breath, before she pulled out her sticky fingers from your cunt. Before you could even process it, she stuffed them inside your mouth roughly as her blue eyes analyzed you.

You sucked them clean as you finally came back down to Earth, finally (kinda) being able to think straight. You were breathless, your legs were shaky and you were sweaty all over again. You finally opened your eyes to meet Paige's eyes, your heart almost jumping out of your chest at the look of utter admiration on her usually disinterested face (at least, when it came to you).

Before either of you could revel in the moment any longer, Paige's phone began to buzz in her sweatpants. She sighed loudly before picking it up, "What's up?"

You could recognize Nika's voice as she spoke but you couldn't quite understand what she was saying. However, when Paige's expression turned cocky as she took another look at you, you had a couple ideas on what it could be about.

"Yep, we made up. We're fine now, don't worry. Yeah, we're good, y'all can head to bed," she nodded along with whatever Nika was saying, a cocky ass smirk on her lips.

"You wanna talk to her? You sure?" Paige took a look at your disheveled appearance, laughing as your eyes went wide. Before you could protest, she handed you the phone. "Here you go,"

"Hey, babe," she spoke softly through the phone. "I made P go and apologize, I hate seeing you fight like this and-"

Her voice slowly became background noise as Paige leaned back into the bed, pulling you into her chest. Your heart began beating out of your chest as you relaxed into her embrace.

"-And I just love you guys, okay? Y/N, you still there?"

"Y-yeah, sorry. I'm just sleepy, we love you too, Nika," you got out as Paige smirked at you.

"Okay, okay," Nika replied, her voice filled with genuine affection. "Get some rest, okay?"

You said your goodbyes before handing the phone back to Paige, who ended the call with a satisfied grin. You couldn't help but roll your eyes at Paige, only she would fuck your brains out then make you answer the phone.

You laid on her chest quietly as she pulled the blanket over your body, pulling you even closer. You guys sat in silence, both of you knew there was a lot of debrief ─ however, both of you were too tired to bring it up.

"I'm sorry for bringing up Caitlin, that was a bitch move," you began as you closed your eyes, getting comfortable beside Paige.

Paige's hand gently traced patterns on your back as she sighed softly. "No, I'm sorry too," she murmured, her voice filled with sincerity. "For being a bitch, and saying all that stuff about you not making it into the WNBA,"

"I know you didn't mean it," you mumbled as you felt yourself drift off into sleep. Paige leaned over slightly to turn off the lights, and you both slowly drifted off the sleep.

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