#Because he CHOOSES to hurt people
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Hello ËÊâĄÉË
I hope youâre doing better, both physically and mentally. I know youâve been through a lot recently, and I truly hope youâre finding moments of peace and comfort in this difficult time.
I wanted to reach out because I usually connect with your thoughts on The Devil Judge, and Iâm curious to see if we align on this perspective as well. I've noticed that many in the fandom view Yohan as being kinder and more selfless than he seems, believing he truly cares about people and their struggles. But from my perspective, it feels different. I think Yohan recognizes others' pains, but it doesnât necessarily mean he empathizes deeply with them or feels much sympathy.
What do you think?
itâs always a pleasure to hear your thoughts.
May the rest of your day be filled with moments of calm and joy.
Hi there đ
Unfortunately, I'm not doing the greatest but, well, that's sort of the norm right now? It could be worse, in all honesty. Me and my wife have some friends visiting from our university days, though, which is lovely! But that also means I'm going to be even more absent from here this coming week. Just a head's up.
Anyhow! Since I don't really read fics or metas for The Devil Judge I admit that I don't know what the consensus of the fandom is on any given subject. Except, perhaps, what I can glimpse in comments on my fics or in the asks I receive here on Tumblr. This means that whatever opinions I express are usually my own without influence from anyone else, which makes them very subjective, pretty limited, and, perhaps, not as well-rounded as if I had spent time discussing them with someone else. And I just want everyone to remember that whenever I answer one of these asks.
These are my opinions but I'm not going to claim that I'm right or that my thoughts are the only valid ones. They might, in fact, be spectacularly wrong since I never run them by anyone before I express them.
So, with that out of the way: Yo Han is not a kind man.
That's not to say that he's incapable of compassion or empathy, but his ability to relate to other people is, at the very least, severely stunted. I know that some think that he must have an antisocial personality disorder but, personally, I'm not comfortable diagnosing him with anything. I'm just not qualified to make that kind of assessment.
But what I can say is that he's definitely not a very considerate man.
But, as with all things Yo Han, the subject is a little more complex than that â and stems back to his childhood and past trauma.
To make a long story short, I think that Yo Han is emotionally mature and intelligent enough to recognise right from wrong. I also agree with you that he can see when people are in pain and, in some ways, probably relate to them. But what he actually does with that information depends entirely on who the person is and what scale we're talking about.
Because, as we see in the drama, Yo Han doesn't really care what happens to the people outside of his small, chosen circle. He was clearly shaken when Han So Yoon was kidnapped and K died, for example, but the unidentifiable mass of "the Korean people" doesn't interest him as much. Yo Han is incredibly loyal, yes, and capable of a fierce, all-consuming kind of love, but it's reserved for a selected few.
As for everyone else?
Not his problem.
And while that's pretty uncaring â ruthless, even â I think it's in part because of his childhood. He was so isolated that he can't really relate to people, only made worse by the fact that his mind probably doesn't work like most people's do. So even if he deeply loves someone, his empathy is still a bit patchy. He's used to pushing through pain and heartache and doesn't quite seem to understand that other people aren't â or at least not to the extent that he does it. Yo Han is a master at compartmentalising but doesn't understand that he's an outlier in that.
And so his ability to relate to people and understand their pain is severely limited. Because he's not working with the same variables as everyone else. Something that will barely faze him is enough to completely break someone else and despite being so clever, I don't think he understands that.
And it's even worse when you look at it on a wider scale. He's even less sympathetic when it's people he doesn't know personally and, quite frankly, I don't think he wants to care about nameless strangers. Yo Han protects and sympathises with the people closest to him â the ones he can see and touch and feel â but he doesn't waste emotional or mental bandwidth on everyone else. In some ways, he might not be capable of that. Because, again, the isolation he was put through as a child probably left quite a lot of scars and made him unable to connect with people in a healthy way.
He's not like Ga On, who genuinely cares about the fate of the common man and their country as a whole. I think that Yo Han sees the suffering and clearly doesn't mind doing a kind act here and there when he gets the opportunity â like donating the prison warden's money â but I still wouldn't call him a kind or a considerate man. He can be but also chooses not to be more often than not.
It doesn't come instinctively to him the way it does for Ga On.
Again, that's not to say that Yo Han doesn't know how to be kind â of course he does â but I don't think he views it the same way most people do. It's almost as if he thinks that kindness is a finite resource and therefore hesitates to waste it on people he doesn't care about on a personal level.
So no, I don't think he genuinely cares about other people's struggles and pain to the degree most people do. But it's not necessarily because he's evil or anything like that, but rather because he's so guarded. I've touched on it a couple of times in Who Holds the Devil, but I think that Yo Han is very cautious to reveal what he wants or admit when he cares about someone, simply because he's afraid of having it taken away or losing the person in question.
And if he were to care about every suffering citizen in South Korea the way Ga On does? I don't think Yo Han could handle that. I think he's shielding himself from that kind of commitment out of sheer self-preservation because every time he cares about someone, he leaves himself vulnerable for heartbreak. And he's not really equipped to deal with that heartbreak should it happen (again: emotionally stunted and childhood trauma)
In some ways, I think Yo Han is too scared to fully care about other people and, even when he does, he's always bracing himself for what he thinks is the inevitable pain of losing them.
But he does want to connect with people. Which means that he can probably learn to be more considerate of people he doesn't love on a personal level, but, again, I'm not sure if he wants to. At least not during the drama or even shortly after it. I think Yo Han is perfectly fine with being the way he is. He doesn't want to be a hero and has no interest in philanthropy â aside from how it might boost his reputation or, alternatively, punish those he thinks are behaving badly (like the prison warden).
But a couple of years down the line if he and Ga On are a couple? I think that Ga On could wear him down enough that Yo Han regularly donates to good causes and such. But Yo Han would do it more because he wants to indulge Ga On than out of any feeling of responsibility of his own. Because, when it comes down to it, I think Yo Han doesn't have any love and devotion to spare for the people outside his immediate circle. Taking care of them is difficult enough what with his upbringing and struggles to understand relationships.
Just like Yo Han says in the drama: I don't care if humanity falls as long as I have you two.
That's what he cares about most and even if he's capable of kindness and compassion, he saves it for the people he thinks matter. But even then I don't think he can empathise as deeply as most people would. Because he just doesn't understand that not everyone has his ability to compartmentalise and briskly deal with their emotions and trauma. I suspect that he thinks that Ga On is a bit too emotional a lot of the time. And even if Yo Han loves Ga On with every fibre of his being, he also thinks that Ga On's inability to control his emotions is both impractical and annoying â maybe even silly. Because Yo Han just doesn't get it.
He can't put himself in Ga On's shoes or understand that some people are just more emotional and need more frequent outlets for said emotions.
So yeah. I don't think that Yo Han is a particularly compassionate or considerate person, and he struggles to fully understand the people he loves, too. It's easier for him to be kind to them, at least, but he can't really empathise with them, either. But I would argue that it's not really his fault so much as a result of his childhood, all the trauma, and how he is a person. And it doesn't mean he's incapable of love or taking care of people â he's just very selective and, sometimes, he'll stumble because he doesn't understand what the fuck is going on x'D
In short: He's a disaster, your honour.
#Amethystina Replies#Anonymous#This is something that I've seen in some comments on WHtD#Where people claim that Yo Han is a sad and misunderstood man with a tragic past#And should be forgiven for everything#And sure#He is all of that#But I'm not forgiving his behaviour#He's still a grown-ass man#Who behaves like an absolute asshole#You can be both at the same time#Sure he's got a lot of trauma#Which I can sympathise with#And can't relate to people in a normal way#Which is at least partly because of the abuse and isolation he suffered as a child#But that's no excuse for some of his behaviour#Because he CHOOSES to hurt people#Even when he knows it's wrong#I think the part that annoys me the most is that some fans forget that Yo Han KNOWS THIS#He KNOWS he's doing the wrong thing#But he does it anyway#And yet these fans try to excuse behaviour he's fully aware of#He's trying to take responsibility but they won't let him#Instead claiming that he just doesn't know better#When he knows full well what he doing#Give him some credit okay?#It's hard work being as much of an asshole as he is
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Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!
[First] Prev <â-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Sorry to everyone who was looking forwards to this comic only to find out I put WWX in the ugliest outfit.#Continuity came first. Plus let's be honest; he did *not* show up in anything fancy. Or in all black as seen in most fanart.#We are at the middle of WWX depression arc. His self-care was 100% because Jin Yanli would be sad if he didn't try to look nice.#Okay okay. Fine I've delayed talking about the kiss long enough.#It is absolutely a core LWJ scene over a WWX scene. Which is made even more fascinating because we don't get his POV.#But we get so many insights! His loss of control and his firmness all contrasted against how he trembles.#And all of that wrapped up in a wonderful self-loathing bow! You go Lan Zhan! You hated yourself so much for this!#WWX is a hilarious narrator for this because he is truly just...baffled by what's going on.#He would push the person away but he doesn't want to hurt their feelings or pride (putting other people first again are we?)#I do understand why this one is divisive for people though. I choose to look at it through a character/humourous lens.#I've seen people defend and admonish this scene as a particularly shitty thing LWJ did and let's be very clear here: It was.#That's why I like it. LWJ did a shitty thing and struggles with it. It's part of what makes him so robust as a character.#It's also fine if you enjoy this scene for it's eroticism. You're not a bad person for that. You are just A Person.#People will have their own experiences with this topic. Be kind to each other alright?
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Wei Wuxian and Narrative Agency â Part Three
For Xiantober Day Five: Past and Present, in which the author gets very unhinged about what parts of the past are shown and how thatâs affected by the present!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
The Power of Agency: Shaping the Narrative
When I've discussed Wei Wuxian's agency previously, Iâve talked about how whatâs shown and omitted tells us about a character, and weâve talked about the character himself. Though this is a niche topic, itâs not necessarily something out of the ordinary to analyse, and we can assume everything up to here has been in some way intentional.
This? Linking structure to a characterâs in-universe preferences?
This is where we get unhinged.
Before I start, letâs quickly establish something which will be important later: although Wei Wuxian is the central character, MDZS isnât strictly from his POV. While omitting events a character doesnât like to dwell on and concealing things the character wishes to hide is common in books with only one narrator, MDZS has multiple narrators which it switches between relatively quickly. This includes Wei Wuxian, but it also includes nearly every major character that appears in the story, and omniscient narrator as well. As a default, this format doesnât lead to this deliberate shaping and omission because of one characterâs preferences, since we have many other sources of information and events â which is what makes Wei Wuxianâs influence over the narrative and structure so interesting. We could have access to a lot more information, and access to it at different times, than we do (and thatâs not an insult, quite the opposite!).
To begin: weâve established that times such as Wei Wuxianâs time on the streets, his three months in the Burial Mounds and his loss in the Siege arenât shown because Wei Wuxian has little agency there. But thatâs not the only special thing about them. Theyâre also the three most traumatic times in his life, and so moments Wei Wuxian himself either canât remember, or doesnât like to dwell on.
This is why discussing Wei Wuxianâs treatment of tragedy in his life was important. Firstly, it shows he doesnât focus on the tragedy in his life, so the idea that the narrative not focusing on this tragedy relates to his character has merit; secondly, it affirms that this is not a passive trait, but a choice. Therefore, when the narrative omits events due to this aspect of Wei Wuxian, itâs respecting not only a character detail â which would be cool by itself â but also an active decision. One that shapes the story itâs made in.
In other words, its very structure is respecting Wei Wuxianâs agency!
Now, of course there are flashbacks to other moments of his past he probably wouldnât like to dwell on, too. But within the structure, theyâre only shown when Wei Wuxian is thinking about them (or when he has reason to)!
Wei WuXian hadnât woken up yet. His eyes were still tightly shut, yet his hand didnât let go either. He seemed to be dreaming, muttering, â⊠Donât⊠Donât be angryâŠâ Lan WangJi seemed somewhat surprised. His voice was gentle, âI am not angry.â Wei WuXian, â⊠Oh.â Hearing this, as though he finally felt assured, his fingers loosened. Lan WangJi sat beside Wei WuXian for a while. Seeing that he was motionless again, he was about to stand up when Wei WuXian grabbed him with his other hand, hugging his arm and refusing to let go. He shouted, âIâll go with you, quick, take me back to your sect!â Chapter 63, EXR translation
Which, of course, is him dwelling onâŠ
Lan WangJi spoke one word at a time, âGo back to Gusu with me.â Hearing this, both Wei WuXian and Jiang Cheng were surprised. Quickly afterward, Wei WuXian laughed, âGo back to Gusu with you? To the Cloud Recesses? Why go there?â He immediately seemed to realize, âOh. I forgot. Your uncle Lan QiRen hates crooked people like me. Youâre his proudest disciple, so of course youâre the same as him, haha. I refuse.â Chapter 62, EXR translation
âŠthe painful flashback immediately preceding this. The third set of flashbacks (which are also painful) are a similar case. Look at the contex:
He lifted the bottom of his robe, revealing a prosthetic leg made of wood, âThis leg of mine was destroyed by you, that night in the Nightless City (âŠ)â (âŠ) âWei WuXian, I wonât ask you if you remember or not. Both of my parents died by your hands. You owe too many people. You definitely wonât remember them either. But, I, Fang MengChen, will never forget! And never forgive you!â (âŠ) âIn the fight at Qiongqi Path, my son was strangled to death by your dog Wen Ning!â âMy shixiong died by poison, his entire body festering due to your cruel curse!â Chapter 68 (immediately preceding the flashbacks), EXR translation
And Wei Wuxianâs own thoughts and words:
Wei WuXian looked at the cultivators before the Demon-Slaughtering Cave. Their expressions were the absolute same as those of the cultivators from the night of the pledge conference, pouring their wine on the ground as they took the pledge to scatter the ashes of the Wen Sectâs remnants and him. (âŠ) Wei WuXian, âNow itâs time to ask just whom it is that treasures it so much. Itâs like Wen Ning. Back then, some certain sects or so were scared to death of the Ghost General. They said theyâd kill him on the surface, but behind their backs they hid him for over ten years. How strange. Who was the one that said his ashes had been scattered back then?â Chapter 79 (immediately succeeding the flashbacks), EXR translationÂ
Once again, Wei Wuxianâs own thoughts relate to the flashbacks weâve just been shown. And, as I previously mentioned, though all the events which are shown are tragic, theyâre also events which Wei Wuxianâs own choices and actions shaped â which he has this to say about:
âThe things I did, not only do you remember them, I remember them too. You wonât forget them, and theyâll stay even longer in my mind!â Chapter 82, EXR
Admittedly, this applies more to the third set of flashbacks than the second (which is still fitting as the third set was the most recent), as in the second, although he still had agency within and influence over his circumstances, the majority of the pain was caused by othersâ actions (excluding, of course, the Golden Core transfer⊠which is something we know stays for a long time in his mind, albeit with a caveat weâll soon discuss). But itâs still important to note â especially considering that otherwise, focusing on this very painful time in his life wouldnât seem like something very in-character for Wei Wuxian to do.
Of course, this can all just be explained by good writing. It is best to insert flashbacks when theyâre relevant to the characters and events in the present day! But it is interesting to compare these to the start of the (not painful) Gusu flashbacks, which open this way:
At a later time, Wei WuXian pondered upon the reason why his relationship with Lan WangJi wasnât good. Getting to the root of the matter, everything started when he was fifteen, coming to the GusuLan Sect with Jiang Cheng to study for three months. Chapter 13, EXR
Again, considering the circumstances around which these flashbacks take place â returning to the Cloud Recesses for the first time since the lectures, and meeting Lan Wangji once more â it makes complete sense for Wei Wuxian to be thinking about these events*. So it does fit the pattern of Wei Wuxian dwelling on something, thus leading to the narrative dwelling on it, too (and being shaped by his thoughts)⊠but thereâs another layer to this. Importantly, it is the only flashback where Wei Wuxianâs present thoughts donât lead to this happening, with his thoughts at an unspecified future time leading to it, instead. I like to interpret this as the text saying that, since these events arenât something Wei Wuxian wouldnât focus on in normal circumstances, he can dwell on them at any time. Therefore, theyâre free to come up in the narrative at any time as well, even if heâs not dwelling on them in the present moment!
So, to summarise: Wei Wuxianâs decision not to focus on the painful times in his life directly influences the narrative to not focus on these times. When painful times are brought up and shown to us, itâs in the context of him thinking about them in the present day, and even then, his most painful moments still arenât shown to us. His agency in this regard is still respected by the narrative structure.
This is the main way his agency influences the structure of the narrative, but Iâd like to talk about the revealing and concealing of information, too. For example, I said Iâd talk about the Golden Core transfer â though Wei Wuxian does think about this many times, as evidenced by his internal narration in Chapter 103. But unlike everything weâre shown through the flashbacks, this is something Wei Wuxian is actively trying to hide from others. And the narrative respects this choice (Wei Wuxianâs agency, again), never reveals it even when it would be relevant in the flashbacks, and we find out not through narration, but through a characterâs dialogue!
And to clarify â I know these aspects may not be in the book for this exact reason. Showing flashbacks in relevant moments is good writing, concealing an important plot point you want to do a reveal for is necessary writing, and MXTX has said she didnât want to write about Wei Wuxianâs time in the Burial Mounds, due to not liking to write transformation sequences (and also because it would not be pleasant at all, which likely also applies to Wei Wuxianâs death). That doesnât prevent it from also being intentional â MXTXâs intelligence is shown in many aspects of this book, and thereâs nothing disproving it â but thereâs no proof for either option, so I wonât pretend there is. I bring this up because I know this feels like Iâm overanalysing, as I feel that way as well.
But, whether itâs intentional or not, it exists in the text, and I adore it â so, regardless, itâs something Iâll explore. Because taking this into account⊠We aren't just told about Wei Wuxian having agency, we arenât just shown it in the text, we arenât even just shown it through which parts of his past are shown and hidden in the structure of the text (as I talked about in Part One). The parts of the past that are shown and hidden also have an in-universe reason for being shown and hidden, this reason being the choices he makes! Agency is the ability of a character to influence the story theyâre in, but Wei Wuxianâs agency, as a property of a character who only exists in-universe, shapes the out-of-universe structure as well! Thatâs how weâre shown its importance! How cool is that?
At The End Of The Road: Summary and Final Thoughts
In this essay, weâve covered how important Wei Wuxianâs agency is not only to the events of the plot, but to the structure of the narrative as well. The narrative omits periods in which Wei Wuxian has little or no agency, in favour of showing us periods in which he does, even when important events happened in the former. This indicates that who Wei Wuxian is without agency isnât important enough to be shown to the audience, and therefore that his agency is an integral aspect of his character in MDZS. Weâve discussed how both in-universe and out-of-universe, tragedy does not define him â out-of-universe, the tragic events in Wei Wuxianâs life are used not to build sympathy but rather to show his strength of character and who he still is despite going through them; and in-universe, he chooses not to focus on the negativity and resentment caused by his circumstances or othersâ actions, instead staying true to his moral compass and enjoying his life in the present day. Finally, weâve also explored how this choice is another reason for the omission of certain events from the narrative, resulting in his agency shaping the story in a very literal way â it affects the out-of-universe structure, as well.
Itâs quite fitting, for a story whose essence is about defying a conventional narrative â that of righteous clans rising up and defeating a great evil â and about a character who defies many conventional narratives on his own â that of status defining how skilled you could be, that for a golden core being necessary for cultivation and other paths being unavailable, that of a tragic but complete story of someone killed for staying true to their moral code (instead, that character returns to life and has a happy ending) â to have its own narrative play a role in such an important and interesting way.
(Or, if an image would be preferable:)
Thank you for reading!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
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*This strong relation to the present day circumstances is another reason I love the flashback placement so much (and why I think itâs such a loss both screen adaptions altered it so strongly)!Â
#get ready for tag thoughts because there are a LOT of them#itâs for THIS reason that fanon wwx bothers me so much (didnât want to get negative on the acual post)#bc so often all the changes are changes that woobify him!#self-sacrificial idiot wwx?? only doing things because⊠poor him he has so many internal issues and values himself so little-#-so of course heâd sacrifice everything before thinking of another option? woobifying#(whenever he sacrifices something itâs a deliberate choice to act on his morals because he values his morals so much â and heâs also very-#-capable and DOES often find ways for no people to get hurt!)#wasnât aware that what happened to him at lotus pier was wrong and needs lwj to tell him that for him to have any idea if it?#woobifying (as we see in the lotus seed pod extra he KNOWS itâs unfair)#(he downplays it retroactively in his memory (links into not focusing on the bad things in his life))#(but thatâs the actions themselves that are being downplayed not their fairness!)#he chooses to act! he is defined by acting! not tragedy â all the more impressive in the face of the amount of tragedy thatâs happened#he could SO EASILY have been a woobie but instead heâs the opposite of one: defined BY his agency instead of the absence of it#that doesnât mean heâs not impacted by tragedy or trauma â he is! but itâs not the most important aspect of his character (bc he doesnât le#itâs also something that bothers me about the changes cql made#by making qq path and nightless city the fault of someone else it means he IS someone whoâs more a victim of circumstance than anything els#he had no control over the tragedies of his first life at all#apart from ig his death being controlled by him? because he just leaps off the cliff during the nightless city siege?? but in THAT case itâ#i watched that part recently (iâm getting through it very slowly) and yeah it reaffirmed my love for this aspect of the book even more#despite. having these exact thoughts for two years already#he also dwells on the past events a lot more than book wwx which adds to that version of him BEING defined more by tragedy rather than who#anyway over 7.3k words total (and 400 more in the tags apparently)... it'll be posted to ao3 in its completion this evening!#mdzs meta#my meta#wei wuxian#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#ééç„ćž#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#gdc
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putting my hands on your shoulders looking directly into your eyes why are you so insistent that Dazai is faking every emotion every second of every day except when he's acting mean or evil why do you think his dark side is more true than his happier or sillier sides
do you not also have multiple facets you show different people? are we not all beautiful multifaceted individuals? are your actions and reactions not influenced by your emotions and state of mind?
can't he laugh at his own jokes? can't he fondly think of the Agency? can't he be dramatic because he wants to? can't he be surprised by something suddenly happening, even if he knew it would happen? do you not jump when the jack in the box gets out even if you were the one working the mechanism?
why would the mean persona be more real? why would any and all joy be faked? why are you only allowing him misery?
#sorry i saw one too many posts talking about dazai's ''masks'' and how he hides his true self from the ada#and what of it if he still has the potential to hurt others? what of it if he's good at hurting? every day he chooses not to lean into it#not too far at the very least.#isn't kyouk.a skilled at killing? did she not choose not to do it?#i'm not saying dazai's never acting (because it does happen) i'm saying too many people are too quick to brush off-#every non-serious non-mean emotion as ''playing an act''#why would the mean persona not be a fake?? you thought about that??? what biases are you holding here#he makes jokes. he acts silly. he's a drama queen. he loves it.#you know what IS tiring? having to look evil and untouchable and impassive in front of a whole organization every day as a teenager#as soon as he gets to lupin with od.a and ang.o he goes silly mode. heck- when he *met* ang.o it was because he went silly mode.#as soon as chuuy.a is in proximity he starts yelling children's insults and starts stupid competitions#his silly mode is just as integrated into his personality as the capacity to be the scariest most evil person you've seen#they are not mutually exclusive and having the capacity for either does not mean acting on them#as asagiri said in an interview: bsd isn't about change it's about adaptation. kyouk.a has the talent to kill. she just chooses not to.#dazai has the skills to be evil. he just chooses good.#that got long in the tags sorry#apparently i talk sometimes
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Sorry, but I canât stop think about this right hereâŠ
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#league of villains#bnha#mha#lov#shigaraki tomura#tenko shimura#bnha shigaraki#mha shigaraki#bnha season 7#mha season 7#LIKEâ itâs stronger than me⊠these words keep replaying in my brain#and they actually destroy me ngl because he is right. HE GOT A POINT.#before you are âbrokenâ everyone doesnât even spare a glance at you⊠some even might just downplay your painâŠ#but as soon as you âget out of characterâ or explode after years of swallowing everything⊠you just become a âcrazy bitchâ or âthe problemâ#which i personally think is sick and twisted because as soon as you choose to stop endure and stand up for yourselfâŠ#not only peoples look at you⊠but they even have the guts to call you dramatic problematic and crazy when youâre just HURT#and you were driven to that point by THE SAME persone who call you dramatic and sensitive who lack accountability#because their egocentrism narcissism and arrogance doesnât allow them to think of themselves to be at fault#hori manipulating and brainwashing everyone into thinking that the lov werenât onto something right here makes me nauseousâŠ#likeâ no. FUCK. NO. WHY ARE YOU INVALIDITATING ALL OF THE LOVs FEELINGS?????? STOP IT. USE YOUR BRAIN DAMMIT.
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Who is the best and who is the worst to sit next to on the plane?
no one could agree who unanimously is the best insisting their seatmate, previous or otherwise, was (ekkyâbenny, bennyâreino, sashaâbobby, swaggyâforsy, luostyâmikksy)
but the worst? with a whopping two votes against him (benny, swaggy) is ekky because hes loud and forces guys into joining the poker table đđđ
special mention forsy and mikksy copping out of the question like theyre carebear incarnates and going everyone is the best :)
Primetime Panthers | 10.30.24 (x)
#carter verhaeghe#aaron ekblad#sam bennett#sam reinhart#evan rodrigues#aleksander barkov#sergei bobrovsky#gustav forsling#eetu luostarinen#niko mikkola#florida panthers#2425#the editing is SO EVIL#âekkys loudâ (cuts to ekky going well /some/ would argue that rodrigues is the best because hes /quiet/)#yeah ekky whos that censored some huh. you guys mustve squabbled about this before so many times#to know sams club existed on the plane. oh sams club...#i need to know the updated poker table layout with the departure of most cats who sat there#swaggy willingly sits at the poker table and gets shocked when the guy whos the worst at poker bats his eyelashes at him to join#my favourite thing is swaggy and benny who dont want to hurt ekkys delicate feelings and try to say it as softly as they can#swaggy looking at the door nervously like ekky is gonna burst in and whine about him choosing him as the worst#him getting even more nervous as he mentions forsy because god forbid he gets in between 542#[insert sasha all by myself swinging his legs as hes sat alone on picture day pic]#bobby âi enjoy the convos i have with sasha :)â vs sasha âwhen i want to talk bobby is always sleepingâ truly comical#also luosty... mikkolier or mikkoLIAR i need to know the spelling of this...#luosty and his shit eating grin as he teases mikksy#insert sasha's comment on mikksy where he goes yeah hes chill hes not as sensitive as lundy#mikksys soft yeah anytime someone mentions he loves people :(((#âa man of the people :Dâ oh they absolutely blasted the groupchat with all the âman of the peopleâ comments people made#when mikksy chugged a beer at elbo room and cussed on local news oh dear god
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"if i loved you less, i might be able to talk about it more" is so fucking bruce it's unreal. the way he always knows what to say as succinctly as he can but the second emotions are involved, coherency is nowhere to be found. he says, "Bad form, we're going over that until you get it right," and he means, "I cannot bear to see you hurt and I need to protect you in the only way I know how; I love you." he says, "Take Robin with you," and he means, "I trust you with something far more important than my life; I love you." he says, "If you want to stay, I won't stop you," and he means "Stay with me, stay with me, stay with me; I love you, I love you, I love you."
#godd talk about your feelings bruce! it's good for you!#like yes i know his first language is apparently cryptic cyphers but he's so much worse when it's him expressing An Emotion#someone he loves gets hurt and he defaults to anger instead of panic. he shouts instead of cries. he goes silent instead of explaining.#he doesn't know how to communicate! he was raised by an employee that was never supposed to be his father!#he stalks the people he loves and invades their privacy and hears static the second someone starts talking about boundaries#because he's an idiot and he's creepy and he kind of sucks and he cares so very deeply#his love is this overwhelming force that he doesn't know how to put into words and so he chooses to say something else entirely#and the people around him love him too and they learn to speak his language and holy shit they make me feel so unwell#bruce wayne#batman#batfamily#being emo about bruce
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The other thing that I think I would want in an Annabeth Wayne AU that I don't think I've seen so far is Bruce being absolutely pissed at Athena.
It was bad enough with Talia and Damian, but Athena is a literal god of wisdom who should know better AND he doesn't even have the "culpability" of having slept with her.
She one hundred percent saw Batman, tactician of the Justice League, was drawn in by her aspect of the Goddess of Strategy, and proceeded to create a child without his consent, a daughter who she didn't even raise before the child became a weapon.
And like whatever else, however fucked up Damian was by his own training to become a child-weapon, at least Talia loved Damian.
Whereas Athena loves Annabeth in the way a Goddess loves, not the way a Person loves, and I don't think Bruce, whose entire identity is so fixated on his relationship with his own parents, would recognize that as love at all.
And, like, Talia put Damian through a lot of shit. I think Bruce would be angry there too. But when push came to shove, she at least at some point brought him to Bruce because she thought it was in her son's best interests.
Athena actively lead Annabeth away from Bruce and into the streets at the age of seven, which Bruce would never see as in her best interest, whatever Athena's godly perspective is, however badly he reacted after Jason's death, even though he couldn't see (and dismissed the idea of) the spiders and the monsters. She was seven. In the streets of Gotham.
Athena let Annabeth fight a major role in two wars back to back without being there to train her or protect her or love her or even advise her. Athena advocated for the cold blooded murder of the other children who had actually tried to keep his daughter safe. Athena sent Annabeth against Arachne when Athena's children have universally died on that quest for a thousand years.
Athena let Bruce think he had gotten Annabeth killed because of his own inability to handle his grief. Let him think his daughter was dead or worse for years. Would have let him keep thinking that if the Fates didn't have other plans.
And just, in true fashion for all of my ideas on a PJO x DC crossover, everyone really comes out more traumatized than before. This includes Bruce.
Because now he wasn't just used unknowingly for a child just once, but twice. And in both cases he's going to have to live forever with the guilt of not having been able to protect his kids from what their other parent wanted to make of them
(On top of all the ways he has directly failed them and made any complexes worse, of course )
#bruce wayne#annabeth chase#annabeth wayne#athena#pjo x dcu#dcu x pjo#again I have to reiterate that I actually do think Athena loves her daughter#I just think that to a human a god's love is inevitably going to look cruel#because they don't and can't love in the same way#giving your child opportunity for Kleos and sending them to a teacher is a love to a goddess#whereas a human parent might never want their child to fight or suffer at all#and even with Bruce's whole Batman and Robin situation#he a) still felt guilt and went back and forth over it multiple times#and b) he was at least trying to guide them and accompanied them into the field and deliberately tried to give them whatever tools they#needed to be both moral and safe#Athena doesn't see a difference between what she did and Bruce's crusade but he absolutely doe#this post is obviously very much more Bruce's POV of course#Athena would have her own but I am biased#'love the way a goddess loves not the way a person loves' - but Rev aren't the gods people#Not fully#I don't think they can be; they're too vast#Behind their personalities they're all personification#so yes and no but not enough#as for bruce reacting badly after Jason's death#I generally don't think he *hurt* her which I've seen some choose to write based on him hitting Dick#but someone in fic wrote a HC that he blamed her at first bc she knew Jason was sneaking out and didn't say and I took that and ran with it#& after his initial outburst he freezes her out bc his anger scares him & he thinks keeping her at a distance will protect her from that#not knowing that she's already internalized that guilt AND already felt prior to this that Bruce was abandoning her in favor of being Batma
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DAY 10: EMPATHY - Lost little pearls of light. Tiny fires in the dark.
YAY YIPPEE a collab piece with @euclydya!! it drew the LOVELY linework and i finished the colors/shading!! wah im incredibly happy i got to do an art collab with y'all, thank you so much my beloveds :D!! <333 <222
without overlay!!
#disco elysium#empathy#de empathy#disco elysium skills#skilltober#skilltober 2024#de skills#voliart#im still going back for the INTs but im posting this one on the actual day because its IMPORTANT!!#everyone look at how Euclydia posed him isnt he so pretty?? i love the hand over his chest he's so peaceful <33#esprit: Euclydia#empathy has the transparent crown because he was the signature skill in my run!! but my headcanon harry's signature skill is volition :3#so voli will have the actual skill signature crown but empathy is my personal choice <33#surprisingly this has nothing to do with the two transparent skill points. that's a whole separate thing that's spoilers for Swept Up hjkjg#a lot of quotes i wanted to use were not empathy quotes so i couldnt use em!! ''I'm glad to be me -- an incredibly sensitive instrument.''#'''A blue forget-me-not; a piece of the grey sky'. Unofficial: 'For a moment there was hope'.'' <- i do not condone moralism hgkjg#hgkgj i hate that my fave's a centralist man but i GET IT. he empathizes with every ideology so he just won't choose. like not pulling the#lever in the trolley problem. too scared to hurt anyone so not taking sides. guy who cares too much! if i make a decision someone gets hurt#best to leave it to a committee of people so no one's at fault! :) <- NO!!! EMPATHY!! THOSE PEOPLE WILL GET HURT ANYWAY!!! DO SOMETHING!#augh out of tag space but this GUY. I HAVE THOUGHTS ABOUT HIM MAN. kisses his forehead. please have opinions my darling hgkjg
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Will never get over Charlie's absolutely feral growl, this woman was ready to lunge across the courtroom and tear Adam to shreds and I am HERE for it
#hazbin hotel#charlie morningstar#and vaggie's âoh shitâ expression at it?#she's already stressed because she has exactly zero good options right now#and then her golden retriever girlfriend starts going feral in the middle of heaven#this episode was so insane and i loved it#charlie is ready to go off like a stick of dynamite tied to a nuke#praying to the fandom gods for charlie to not just kill but absolutely annihilate adam#i want her to make him pay for how much of a dick he's been to her#he was an immense dick to her when they met and again in the courtroom#he talked shit about angel specifically as well as her people in general#and the way he used vaggie's darkest secret and source of self-hatred to hurt charlie?#let charlie choose the power of incredible violence against this piece of shit
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i ship kyle with like 5 different people but the most important thing to understand about him is that he has never and will never get over alex and if she came back to life he would drop everything to be with her without a second thought
#aouguaghâŠâŠ. kylealex#heâs said no every time heâs been offered the chance to bring her back just because in those cases it means the villain wins#and he just wonât let anyone else be hurt because of him#but! if he had to choose between the ring and alex. i think heâd choose alex#there is a story in my head where ion alex from another universe comes over and starts killing people#and kyle goes um ok??? she probably has a good reason. maybe killing people is her hyperfixation. donât judge her sheâs done nothing wrong
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being obsessed with yakumo is a job and baby iâve never called in a sick day!!!!!
#nu carnival#yakumo âĄ#you could not pay me to ramble this extensively about anything else#but yakumoâs trauma?? his childhood?? his growth?? his fears and insecurities and how they affect his current relationships??#his abandonment issues and jealousy and darker desires???#and how heâs so scared heâll hurt others even though itâs far more likely heâll be the one getting hurt??#how heâs not violent or scary at all but after years and years heâs been conditioned to think he is??#the significance of his relationship with eiden??#the significance of his âplatonicâ relationships with the other clan members??#how important his grandparents were in raising him??#how his desperate want to hide his serpentine features and be ânormalâ is a perfect allegory for autism??#the fact that heâs been treated horribly in the past and yet still chooses every day to be kind??#how he probably definitely has bpd??#the burden he has to carry just because of who his ancestor is??#the fact that it almost seems like what he does doesnât matter because the actions of his ancestor will always be looming over him??#how heâs been hurt so many times both physically and emotionally and yet his heart is still so open to loving others??#how he has a tendency to push down his traumatic memories until he thinks they no longer affect him??#and how even when heâs suffering because of that trauma he would still rather suffer alone than bother someone and tell them??#how slowly but surely heâs unlearning all of the harmful ideas burned into him since his was a child??#and how heâs learning that people do love and care about him and heâs not a burden and he deserves love and care??#and that the serpentine traits he tries so desperately to hide arenât as disgusting as he was meant to believe??#that his dark desires donât define or control him and that itâs okay that he has them??#that just because he has them at all doesnât make him a bad person???#why he makes soup for his loved ones so much!!!! yes that is important actually#i will sit and write about that for hours and hours for FREE#my favourite fictional character of all time heâs so so real#heâs so well written and his trauma and growth are handled with such care and consideration
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dadzai brainrot is strong today.
click for better quality!
please reblog if you like
#bsd#dazai osamu#bsd kyouka#bsd atsushi#art#headcanon time#dazai is -surprisingly- pretty good with kids#he's the funny uncle#or the cool brother who teaches you how to pick a lock#kyouka's first day at agency was a mess because it was always kouyou or one of her staff who did her hair and clothes#she was already stressed#and atsushi can't brush a hair without hurting#brushing hair without hurting needs a special technique guys#you know it if you have curly or even wavy hair#and dazai knows ofc (because chuuya)#he was very stressed at first because him taking care of people??#(he also knows how to dress up he just chooses to dress in that shitty trenchcoat and pants)#i hate them and i'm not even sorry#anyway#comic#bungou stray dogs#my art#fanart
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#okay but reading this Belloc essay on Austen really made something click in my mind#and itâs because of something he said#which is that women care more about what men think of them generally#(as a general rule. not all the time. etc.)#and men care more about the opinion of the one woman they care about#like women do care (as a first instinct at least) what every man she meets thinks of her#but men are mostly indifferent. until theyâre NOT.#which makes women more vulnerable to a greater number of people#but men are MORE painfully vulnerable to the woman whose opinion they care about#and I donât actually know that that vulnerability only extends to a woman they are attracted to/feel romantic feelings for#I think if they just think well of you as a person you (a woman) have a lot of power over them#which is sooooo interesting and makes so much sense!!!! and is something Iâve sort of been dancing around with teaching#like. a lot of the boys I teach come to care about what I think about them#which doesnât mean they all have a crush on me. though that step can be super easy and super small#hence the need for the boundaries of steel etc. but it does mean that they care what I think about them!#and Iâve always felt that instinctively and felt that I had to be so gentle with them because the power to crush them is mine if I so choose#donât let me overstate it. it doesnât happen all the time or anything close to it. but the thing about me being a teacher is that#they are forced to know me not just in a surface-level way. simply because I spend so much time with them#and talk to them a lot!#ANYWAY. enough about me but yeah this hit me so hard and of course exceptions exist#and/or endless variations on this exist because people are unique and surprising and also everything is changing all the time#etc. etc. but there is something to this I think! and you know what#itâs so interesting because that base-level instinct for women (allowing it to be a thing I mean) can be grown out of#I have trained myself out of/maturity has helped me leave behind that immediate female instinct#of being hurt at the idea that this random waiter (for example) is indifferent towards me. Iâve come to accept it#the instinct is still there!!! because imo women are always scanning and searching and sizing up. and also we are so open to being won over#if that makes sense? which is why insta comments complaining about how only good looking men get away with things like. PLEASE.#there are so many medium-ugly men who get married. itâs the average because the average woman is prettier than the average man#(this is not an insult) women CAN be and usually are so open to being surprised. won over. moved by the simple fact that a guy likes them#and men are not like that. but my point is: men donât grow out of caring if they care. when they care they care sooooooo much. anyways yeah
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Personally if someone I was in love with stood in front of me and told me to MY FACE that a person they met like 5 minutes ago sees them better than anyone else, there is no way I'd try anything with them, to keep my dignity if nothing else đ I will never understand why fandom has these insane expectations for Eddie đđ
THIS IS WHAT IâM SAYING đ like yeah eddie can be conflicted about buck being with someone without the implication that them not being together and making babies is all on him because âall heâd have to do is say something.â WHY WOULD YOU EXPECT HIM TO SAY SOMETHING? heâs watched buck be a complete disaster for years and buck apparently still has NO understanding of where he belongs in eddieâs life - even platonically. if i were eddie i would not be putting all my shit on the line with him đ but buck approaching eddie and saying âi have feelings for you, and i want you, and i want this, and i want us to make it work togetherâ would be DIFFERENT. it would be growth!
#asks#not to be mean but i have to wonder sometimes if some of this is because of the way people relate to buckâs brand of insecurity#because buck doesnât realize that yes it sucks for him that heâs insecure BUT IT SUCKS FOR EVERYONE AROUND HIM TOO#ESPECIALLY EDDIE. and people who are that level of insecure frequently do not see how they hurt the people around them with their jealousy#or their assumptions that someone would just abandon them or that someone whoâs shown they care is just a liar or doesnât really mean it#buck certainly doesnât. sooooooooooo#part of buck choosing eddie is trusting the strength of their relationship#and i think that would mean the world to eddie who just wants to be ENOUGH
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Honestly it was less so about actually leaving the monarchy than the choice for Wille to leave the monarchy, that makes it all the more powerful.
#he chose himself#he can advocate for the mental health for young people (as simon suggested and obviously supports which AHHH MY HEART)#and in turn help himself#like he chose simon already in s2 finale#that was done already imo#he chose his own stability (which good!!! he should!!!) and in turn that will make wilmon stronger đ„č#like simon deserves a stable partner!!! and wille realized that#he wants a partner that will choose to take care of himself!!#and i love love loveeee that simon wanted wille to leave that place because of HIMSELF like heâs the bestest boy#and wille knows this#like iâm not sure how long a*gust will truly be able to hang in there tbhâŠ.he did NOT look happy (good).#who knows what will happen (open ended!)#but it matters now because wille really needs to work on himself like i love him very much but that is not a stable boy and it hurts me#on a personal anxiety-likened level đ§ #but there is hope.#but one dayâŠone day. â€ïžâđ©č#prince wilhelm#wilmon#young royals#wille my beloved đ
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