#BREAK SOME WHITE PEOPLE STUFF! WTF!

[ace-and-ranty]

The bathroom subplot in Hidden Figures is dumb for many reasons, but the top one I can’t get over it is... 

Why did her boss vandalize the colored bathroom sign? In a building that, as far as we all know, only has black people in it? How does that fucking help Katharine, you eedjit? You absolute buffoon? If you want a physical symbol to show she is welcome to use the bathrooms at your building ---which is what she actually needs--- then you should be smashing the “whites only” sign at your building. 

What the fuck are you breaking a bathroom miles away for. What the fucking hell does that even mean.

[thestrangestthlng]

Thoughts and prayers rants...

So, now that I've had almost 48 hours to marinate on this and cycled through my emotions, I am in a much better headspace to talk on the whole 9-1-1 of it all.

But this bears repeating: We fell in love with Tommy because he made Buck fall in love with Evan.

So, first and foremost, I've decided that canon stopped for me at 8x05. lol. I am going to continue with my BT train like that shit show didn't happen. And for me, for a while, I am going to let the show end there. I will go back, probably after the hiatus, but not how I was. I do love all the characters on this show (some more than others) and I still want to be able to see their journey, but I need a break from that manipulation stunt. I'm still going to share all the positive BT stuff I see and all the beautiful Lou content I see.

Secondly, now that I am over the initial hurt of the breakup, I'm just mad. We were manipulated intentionally with 8x05 for us to feel worse when the break up happened. That was unnecessary. And that was cruel. And I know that a lot of this is because it was the icing on a shit week. Emotions were already raw due to the election and it was reallllllyyyy bad timing for this, but that doesn't make the way they did it okay, just that it can explain why there was such a strong reaction for many of us, on top of the completely justified anger.

Breakups happen, and that's okay. If it was the end of Tommy's time on the show, that's okay. I am a Buck girlie and I always will be. But... the breakup was reductive, stereotypical, and just poor storytelling. I get they want to leave doors open a crack, because you never truly know, but turning him into an OOC stereotypical biphobic gay man is disgusting. You had this beautiful thing and you shat on it. I am going to do another post about my personal relationship with groundbreaking storylines next.

That was a miscommunication. That was a breakup where someone chases after you and is like wtf actually just happened. It felt like whiplash, because that is not how breakups are formulated in media. You know how else you could have written him out of the story?

At the date (and the basketball tickets are actually a really sweet touch when you think about it) Tommy could have told Buck that he got a job offer in another city or state or that his parents are ill and he has to go home to take care of them and asked Buck to go with him. At the apartment, it could have been buck telling him that as much as he could see a future with him, he can't go with him.

Would it have sucked? Yes. But it wouldn't have induced this amount of rage.

For over six months Lou and BTs have been at the receiving amount of a ton of vitriol. And that's not to say that there weren't antagonizers on this side of the fence or that BTs never did anything wrong, but this isn't a both sides bullshit piece. People can suck everywhere, but only one "side" harassed an actor and his family with death threats, he read about the "stoning" calls, used slurs on a regular basis. All of this persisted for months for it to turn out that he was the only one who seemed to give a shit about the story and it's representation. There honestly doesn't seem like there would have been anyone better for it.

You know what's ironic? It was the Buddie's hate and vitriol that pulled me into fandom and made me love Tommy and then Lou. When they would run their mouths, I would look into it and I found a man who genuinely seems like (he is still someone we don't know) a wonderfully kind, sweethearted, genuine man. He looks like a bundle of light and his smile can warm even the coldest hearts. So their vitriol made me a fan. So thanks BoBs.

Buck and Tommy wasn't just about Buck's queerness and definitely not about "wanting to see two white men kiss". It was about our love for Buck. We saw him happier and more fulfilled than he's ever been. We see his life being lived and full of love and stuff and joy.

Again:

We fell in love with Tommy because he made Buck fall in love with Evan.

And you know what, not matter how reductive and all the phobics that breakup was, they can never take that away from us.

[arkady2]

i SWEAR TO GOD winslow is an absolute dump. i want out of this goddamn school. I had grades good enough to go to arcadia when i got here but nooooo, the waiting list is hundreds of people long!! >:(

so normal class day, right? just back from break. going around, doing whatever, then find out that there’s caution tape in a certain section of hallway. look through, and they’re carting stuff out of someone’s locker in BIOHAZARD BAGS.

so obviously i want to know what’s going on. i’m no tinker, but im clever enough to be able to make battery-powered cameras and stuff, so i do. leave one there, go ask around

next class, i go ask around and apparently there was a PERSON in that locker??????? like, instant hospital panacea visit cause of the biohazard stuff??

like wtf??????

apparently there are rumors that the person stuffed in there was from the local white supremacist gang whose been harassing some girl from track, but those are terrible rumors

i can’t find any proof anywhere of her actually being part of any gangs, and her last name (not putting here cause privacy) and the fact that she has never ever interacted with any of those people from gangs ever in my other recordings of stuff makes it really unlikely that she actually is part of a gang. but then why harass random track girl?

the hell is going on here?????

so i go back during lunch and get the little battery powered camera thingy i set up and look at the footage more closely, and the stuff they’re carting out is literally garbage and used women’s hygiene stuff. enough to fill up a locker!!?? i can still fucking smell it in the HALLWAY what the FUCK i’m going on at this SCHOOL WRBDJDISJFLTO

fuck this man. at least i’ll be out of high school by summer so i can leave this shithole. but goddamn.

also maybe this is me reading too much capefic but this is like. a textbook ‘trigger’. if the world was like those bs capefics, i’d be packing my bags and leaving rn. this foster family can go fuck themselves far as i’m concerned. i will hitchhike back to california istg *^*

[wangmiao]

im a honky ass white girl who's never watched any chinese cinema before apart from some wong kar-wai films - and I had never seen any chinese television! - but im superrrr into sci-fi, so that's how i ended up reading three-body. only found out about the tencent adaptation / cdrama last week!! I started watching it with engsubs just out of curiosity... it's soooo much better than the netflix adaptation wtf. like it's not even close!!! the respect for source material and the fact the cdrama actually improves on the book by fleshing out the characters more?? im losing my mind. netflix could never.

anyway. please keep up the great content, we must let the world know ✊✊✊ sorry for my strange message out of the blue.

(shiwang 5eva btw. but I only speak/read english so cannot read any of the fics... crying myself to sleep at night.)

hello friend! thank you so much for sending in this ask! i'm so glad that people who are not familiar with cdramas can still enjoy tencent's three-body <3! and you are so right about the characters in this adaptation even liu cixin himself thought so:

so if you already like wang miao from the novel, you have to try this tv adaptation!!! every other main character is well rounded too. and the decision to add a lot more to the relationship development between shi qiang and wang miao is a wise choice as well (shiwang 5ever indeed!!!). it is something that is not very focused on in the novel, but it totally makes sense, and it's a lot better than adding any other types of relationship to other characters.

also thank you for liking my content and the encouragement! i'll try my best. sometimes it's really hard for me to deal with a tiny fandom xD, and i'd take breaks before i'm mentally strong enough to post again, but i'm glad to see that some old fans are active again and we are getting new fans! i really hope that more international viewers will get into this show, and maybe there'd be more english shiwang fanfics.

and i'd like to use the chance to clarify to new fellow fans that i do post about other cdrama (occasionally kdrama) stuff even though a large portion will still be zhang luyi and yu hewei (shiwang's actors) related. if you are only here for three-body, it is very understandable. you can follow my three-body post archive @shiqiangs instead, or use the directory/tag list to look for old three-body posts yourself.

[dasha-through-the-snow]

Same Chris chan anon, I’m back. I saw your reply, and yeah, I agree on some parts. Good people can turn bad.

What I meant was that if you’re a person with strong values, you would’ve never done that stuff. It was plain sexism. A person with strong values wouldn’t do that because their actions dictate what kind of person they are.

And while I understand that you don’t SUPPORT chris chan, you can’t be like “well! Actually, women, stfu about his sexism!!! He did it because he was bullied online!!! And shut up about how he sexually harassed his female friends beforehand!!!”

Like. Think critically. This was an actual crime. With actual victims. And now he’s out of jail??? Male privilege at its finest. He should’ve NEVER gotten out of jail.

Also, rape is like, in my opinion, the only crime that can NEVER be excused. Because nobody forced you to do it??? Nobody can use it as self defense. Nobody recovers from it like a wound. It’s not simple. It’s a complex hate crime against women.

On another note, I don’t like bullying. I’ve been a bullying victim for many years. And even worse, IN REAL LIFE. But I never would’ve done that. Because plainly, I’m not sexist.

Chris Chan was porn sick. That’s it. He harassed women, did something unforgivable to his mother, and became “trans” to intimidate lesbians into dating him. That’s a straight white man if I’ve ever seen it. The internet is cruel, but it doesn’t turn men into rapists. That’s their own doing. We need to hold men accountable for what they do. We can’t coddle them or they’ll just keep doing shit. It’s never justified!!! Never!! Even the nastiest woman doesn’t deserve it because it’s a hate crime against women as a whole!

Have empathy towards the victims. We never know what they went through, and their suffering was much worse than what a brain rotted straight white man went through. Because let’s bffr, if a man I knew told me he’s a woman because he wants to bang a lesbian, draws porn of me, and then rapes his mom AND PEOPLE ONLINE DEMAND HES CALLED A WOMAN AND THAT HE DESERVES PITY??? That would be my breaking point.

He’s a whole ass villain 😭😭 why can’t y’all see that

I don't believe in perfect villains or perfect victims.

We don't need to villianize Chris to have empathy for Barbara. We don't need to gloss over Barbara being a horrible person to feel horrible for what happened to her.

It's not a black-and-white world, no matter how much Ayn Rand wanted it to be.

Chris was severely abused and neglected by his parents. Barbara specifically fostered unhealthy attachment, which absolutely did not help in this situation.

I don't think we need to state over and over again that FUCKING YOUR DEMENTIA-RIDDEN MOTHER IS WRONG. I think that's pretty obvious by itself.

But just taking a step back and looking at the whole situation in context is important.

And it's important to realize that the collective internet didn't just "bully" Chris. They manipulated and gaslighted this person for over a decade. They derailed Chris's life and any middling chance they had at becoming a normal person. They egged on their every worst instinct and broke this person's brain and will. That goes beyond regular bullying.

I think, overall, it's the internet looking at a monster we created and then refusing to accept that harassing, bullying, gaslighting and obsessively documenting a living, breathing human being for over a decade because they're "cringe" is a bad thing. So Chris has to have been a monster from the start.

Chris is out of jail, because the judges don't know WTF to do with them. You can't hold a person in jail with no trial for more than a year, rape is really hard to prove with dementia patients, who might not even remember it, incest penalties are their own can of legal worms and trying a person as severely autistic as Chris is borderline-impossible.

The best outcome for everyone would be to put Chris in an assisted living facility. But I doubt that's gonna happen.

Also, I refuse to comment on Chris's trans status. It's between them and their psychologist. I simply don't care, because it changes very little.

Yeah, I do think Chris deserves pity. Condemnation AND pity. We shouldn't just forgive their horrible actions. But we should at least have the humility to realize that we would be capable of some monstrous shit if we were ever treated like that.

YOU don't think you would've done something horrible in that situation, but you HAVE NOT been in the same situation. And thank your lucky stars for that.

[yellowloid]

i think one of the main problems of tumblr (and fandom culture, and the internet in general) is that people tend to forget as human beings we are made of multitudes. nothing is ever just black or white - there are infinite shades of grey in between and that is the very thing that makes us, well, human.

sometimes people have contrasting opinions within themselves and - guess what - even contrasting feelings. sometimes people feel strongly about stuff and that is okay. you can love something/someone so much and at the same time find yourself disappointed by something related to it/them. that happens. it's okay.

i'm not gonna talk about what's going on on twitter because tbh i haven't checked so i have no idea wtf they're on about there, but i want to focus on our little tumblr community - which is so special because of the fact that it is (mostly) conflict-free, and if there's something we share it's a kind of visceral love for the boys that i'm sure everyone here can understand.

this is not an indirect @ anyone in particular, but i've seen some posts going around talking about all the negativity on the dash after last night, and i wanted to share my two cents on that.

we all love them. we all fucking love them so much and we know every time they set foot on stage we're guaranteed to be blown away by how fucking good and special and talented they are. they know how to deliver a spectacular performance (even in emergency situations like yesterday, with alex's laryngitis which is definitely far from gone) and they know how to keep the audience's attention fixed on them. they're a special kind of hypnotising, and every show is unique in and of itself *because* of their incredible presence, regardless of what setlist they might give us.

we all know that, and yesterday's show was no exception. it was amazing, powerful and breathtaking like every show they deliver. mindblowing, as always. as simple as that.

and that's exactly what can turn disappointing real quick. they know how fucking good they are. they know how much potential they have, and that all this tour they've been using up to 10% of said potential. they're incredibly talented and smart, and still decide to stick to their comfort zone every. single. night. with few exceptions, obviously, and mostly never from the album they're supposed to be touring. that's what upsets people here - the fact that they're letting their own HUGE potential go to waste.

glastonbury is a milestone. they had nothing to prove, of course, having headlined it already and more than once in the past. everyone knows what they're capable of. but glastonbury is special, too, and instead if felt like just another random show they could then go and tick off their list. done, next. rinse and repeat.

and of course we also all know it was an emergency. alex has been straining his voice for a long time now - the three consecutive london gigs were the breaking point, and i'm so glad they took a bit of time to let him rest, despite the fact that they probably hated having to cancel the dublin show. but they couldn't ditch glasto, and so they showed up and they did a fucking amazing job. alex sounded so good and i think i can speak for all of us when i say i was so incredibly relieved to see he was okay. i was shaking and biting my nails worried sick about him for DAYS up to the moment they appeared on stage and seeing him get up there and kill it with a fucking crazy performance, putting in all that effort and dedication despite the fact that he's no doubt still recovering (no way his laryngitis is 100% gone, and i hope he gets some more rest because he needs it) made me so proud of him, so fucking happy and proud and i couldn't really love him more. i love him so much, i love them all so much and i know everyone here also does. no one here is blaming it on him for whatever happened yesterday. we're all just fucking glad and grateful he could show up in the first place. he's the most special most talented most beautiful little guy ever and we all love and cherish him so much it hurts. and he did so fucking well, as always. i hope he knows that, and i hope he knows he's allowed to be sick and he's not to blame for anything. i would personally fight anyone who dared say anything bad about him because no one fuck's with tumblr's most beautiful most precious babygirlboy. no one!!!!!

having said that, big changes in the setlist - especially a live debut of hello you or other new songs - were highly unlikely and we all knew that. they probably wouldn't have had the chance to rehearse due to alex's sickness. and that's okay! sure everyone would love to see those songs finally make their grand debut. but that can wait, because alex's health is more important.

and let's face it. i don't think it's that big of a reach to say that even if alex hadn't been sick, the setlist wouldn't have changed that much anyway. there's songs that simply cannot be scrapped, songs to which they're particularly attached and songs to which average fans are also particularly attached. then there's songs that have been on rotation, and songs that have finally already made a comeback during the sheffield shows. taking away all that, the songs that have an actual real possibility of coming back aren't that many - as much as it hurts me to say it, they won't be playing secret door or piledriver waltz or batphone or whatever more niche song anytime soon. and we know that, no one *really* expects them to. because they have to gather to the general crowd, and as repetitive as their current setlist might be, it works. could house more new songs - they skipped big ideas? and songs such as mr schwartz and iaqwitia haven't made a comeback in such a long while... but still. it's bomb. it works, and it works fucking well.

however, there were other changes that could have been made to make glasto special - changes that wouldn't have been a risk to alex's health; small things that could have made a difference, even a tiny one. @mrschwartz said it perfectly in her tags (i hope it's okay to show these sbfksjf i just think you put it into words really well):

it WAS a win. the sole fact of headlining glasto, in and of itself, is a win. a big fucking one at that. and little changes could have been made to make it memorable - to make it stand out when compared to every other gig they played this tour. there definitely were highlights - not only with alex's antics but also lyrically, with the jet skis/iwby/star treatment moment, which was OUTSTANDING - but for the rest nothing really spoke GLASTONBURY. nothing else *really* stood out, and that's a shame.

(not even gonna touch on the miles thing because yeah we all know they probably wanted to do it but couldn't for some reason; it's pretty clear rn that him showing up in london was to make up for him not being able to be there yesterday; we all had our suspicions and they were right. still bummed tho because them playing glasto together is a tradition!)

but considered all that, it is what it is. no one is gonna go around unstanning them because of last night. if anything, when they pull this shit they just make us want to follow them even more, to see what they'll be up to in the next shows. what aces they have up their sleeves - because we know just as well as they know that they have many. they're just too comfortable in their routine to pull them all out, and hopefully sometime in the near future we'll get to see more of what they can really do.

again, it was an amazing show. my heart was beating so fast and i kept grinning like an idiot at the screen, just because they were there. just because they showed up in the first place, with their talent and beauty and power and insane energy. just because i love them so much i can't even begin to explain it.

and i was a bit disappointed, too. because we know how much potential they have. because if they can put up an amazing show like that using only a crumble of that potential, we can only imagine how insanely spectacular of a performance they could deliver if they used even a little bit more of it.

but they refuse to, and that's what can be upsetting. but it doesn't take away the love we have for them. the two things can coexist, and they don't take away from each other. if anything, i woke up this morning with even more love for them than i did yesterday, exactly because they frustrate me with how legendary they are, and how bad i want them to show that to the whole world.

i love them, i'm disappointed, and that's not gonna stop me from loving them even more.

[chaifootsteps]

This is off topic. I just wanted to say that the Stardew Valley game has a fantastic relaxing vibe. I listen to "no commentary gameplays" of it sometimes while going to bed. It's something I probably would've played as a kid or teenager. But I feel like some part of the fandom has ruined the game for me.

The game only has one black character, a half black/white character, and a customizable player character that can be a poc. Every other character in the game is white. This is nothing new, but it's still disappointing. Now the part where some of the fandom comes in and ruins it for me is when they get defensive over this topic and dismiss anyone even discussing this. To some people it feels normal ("given the setting of a small town with farmers blah blah"), it's how it should be (for accuracy), it "shouldn't have diversity just to have it", and it's keeping politics out of the game. These are viewpoints I saw when I was trying to read about a diversity mod for the game that added different ethnic goups, diff. cultural stuff, had gender diversity, etc.

That infuriates me and frankly makes me a little sad. To merely exist as a poc (or nobinary or trans) is a politic statement to these shitheads. I'm over white people being the default and if anyone else exists then that has to mean something. Why do poc need a reason to exist? Why does the maximum need to be a token? Also, wtf is wrong with having a diverse group of farmers just because? Who does that hurt besides a racist asshole's good time??? SV has wizards, you can turn people into birds, but to have black, asian, indigenous, etc. farmers breaks the immersion and fantasy? Fuck out of here.

Stuff like this just kills my enthusiasm to ever play the game myself.

It's true, a bad fandom can ruin a good thing so fast. Sorry your experience with this one has been so shitty.

That said, Stardew Valley's fantastic -- it's one of the few games I've played through repeatedly -- and so, so moddable. Seriously, if you're going to get it, definitely get it on PC and fill it with as many poc characters as your heart desires.

[spaced-out-cosmos]

I'M GOING TO TELL THE STORY OF EVERYTHING WE KNOW ABOUT BMTH LORE. WHY??? BECAUSE I CAN.

I don't feel like citing all the sources and the little bits. I'm just going to type up the timeline that I'm aware of and see if it makes a cohesive story.

So it starts in an alternate dimension? or maybe this dimension, but they're calling it by the later names? dunno. anyway, this guy named skys is born and he's got pink hair. since there's been a lot of radioactivity and nuclear fallout and shit, people have been born with stark white hair, but the pink haired people are even rarer. in skys' land of novosovia, people think pink haired people are the Harbingers Of Doom. so skys gets abandoned at the ripe old age of eight. he gets inducted into a cult of some kind where the leader is a pedophile, and eventually, skys stabs him to death and frees himself. he comes up with this hypothesis that pain can help you transcend human consciousness, and starts nattering on about it in interviews.

meanwhile, there's a guy named karl strassman, and he's a researcher. he's watching some interviews with skys, and he's like, "well damn, skys knows stuff that i spent a kphillion years researching and he has no formal education! i gotta talk to this guy." so karl convinces his fellow research friend, dallus lauren, to go and meet with skys.

anyway. so strassman and dallus get invited to skys and his band's invite-only show at this shady dig called the october palace. when they walk in, there's some craaaaaazy shit going down, and strassman and dallus are like wtf? but skys finds strassman and shows him how he can get people to transcend their own consciousnesses through pain (i think he stabs a lady named ro. yes, it's as wild to me as it is to you). and strassman and dallus are like, yo, this man's a genius. and they start working together as the Big Trinity. and that's how the Cult of MANTRA begins.

because novosovia doesn't like skys, but you know who does? the peoples. they're like, whoa, there's something to this! and skys floods the club scene with MANTRA, some kind of drug, and suddenly you've got a full-fledged cult. but do i need to emphasize that novosovia really doesn't like skys? because they don't. but you know who DOES? the shady company arc/hive (run by elias mortem and victor carmine, and no, i'm not sure if this is true, i'm speculating here, but i think they were the ones who organized the trinity's extraction), who's like, WHOA, these three have something big here! and they march in and start invading novosovia (not fully sure why yet. might've missed something. feel free to correct me). anyway there's this whole thing which might've been the chapel incident where skys gets off his head on drugs, takes something - presumably MANTRA - and falls into a coma. arc/hive people yoink him, strassman, and dallus out of the shitstorm that is novosovia, along with six other kids with pink hair. dallus and his wife escape with their kid, who may or may not be ren. they, and skys's unconscious body, get put to work in an arc/hive facility.

now here's where it gets complicated. because we're missing some info, i'm speculating majorly. but i think it's here that we meet rebecca sinclair, a terminally ill researcher. dallus creates a body for her that won't break down and she becomes the face of a new era. but i think this is some kind of distraction, or maybe one of the first experiments on the whole pain-transcendence theory? not sure. anyway, rebecca kinda drops off the radar, dallus dies after making some revolutionary ideas, and his kid activates EVE. yes, EVE, big bad EVE, the AI behind the whole shitshow. Ren is like, WHOA, CHECK IT OUT, SHE KNOWS EMOTIONS! But eve is kinda a sociopath. and now i'm tired and hungry so i'll edit this later and post more on it. but that's what i've felt like writing down so far. will write more when i have more energy to sum it all up, because this isn't even half of it.

happy fun time :D

[spicybylerpolls]

while people are on the topic of finn, a little appreciation for our will byers' actor! noah!

i feel like he could have turned out like a model or something, if you see when he was younger, he was all in proportion and like very pretty boy, a traditional, good looking young man. but now thats he's older and grown into his features a little more - he's not entirely there, that wont happen until they finish growing at like 25 ish, but he is more oddly proportioned now in a nice way. he's EVER so slightly chubbier. he's also mega goofy, but in a different way to finn (although not THAT different actually). he gets away with it more cos he's still handsome in a traditional western way except for the obvious jewish features that im sure lots of bigots hate (see all the toxic milevens on twitter). his teeth are kinda goofy but also cute, but it's his smile that does it. it's kind of contained and shy, down-turned as though he has internalised not wanting to smile too widely, or perhaps just feeling shy and bashful when he's happy. which is VERY will. i think they are more similar than he let's on tbh. i think he's secretly a shy one, just like when he was a kid.

whereas finn seems to burst with light and laughter, then sudddenly realise he's in public and become self conscious again, and his face just turns sour af lmaooooo bless him

mad props to the casting director tbh - these are two performers with faces that are endlessly mesmerising, and acting skills to match. i feel so grateful to be watching their portrayals of this story unfold in real time. the fact that it may break new ground is a bonus, but even if fit doesn't, i've had a ball for the past couple of years! if nothing else, having their first adult scene together could work wonders for their professional confidence. if i was a pro actor, i would love to do an intimate scene with a close friend of mine, we would have a ball and the trust would be unreal.

and lastly, here's a funny little story...

years before i joined the fandom proper in 2022, when s2 was just coming out, my friend (who was very mainstream) showed me some pictures of a photoshoot with noah and finn. we were in our early 20s, fresh from college and no clue what to do with life. and my friend showed me this black and white photoshoot on insta (i think its the one noah recently posted to show his excitement of working with finn again for finn's birthday?), and she was quiet as i looked, waiting to hear what i would say.

and i was like... they look....

*massive pause while I look at her, incredulous and mildly disturbed*

and she said '... hot.'

and I was like YES, WTFFFFFFF

and she was like WTFFFFFF

and we were so uncomfortable and confused! they were young teens! but the fact that it was my mainstream friend who had literally just discovered the 80s through this show, who had a first class English degree from Edinburgh university, who had just started working at a prestigious publishing house in the city, who had a rather gorgeous boyfriend... i mean she was the most down-the-line person you ever met. and i was just so surprised and grateful she had trusted me to say this, and we proceeded to discuss wtf was going on.

basically - photoshoots, esp when the cast were teens, kind of passively sexualised them. im not talking explicit, but rather encouraging pensive brooding stares and poses that are something you would see in a couture magazine. they looked older because they werent smiling, and were emulating these poses that adult men would do.

on top of that, finn esp really reminded me of the first boy i ever had a proper crush on at 13. i remember it so clearly because its not the hair or the skin or whatever superficial stuff, but rather his expressions and attitude (and the freckles). finn, when younger, had this arrogant (and therefore irresistible) teen boy vibe which exactly matched this boy i fell in love with at 13. i realise now that thats all probably from a place of insecurity on finn + the boy's part, but even at 22 sitting in this cafe with my friend, browsing insta innocently, i could remember exactly what it was like to be 13 and my heart was just beating. whenever i think of that crush on that boy, i am 13 again. i am not a grown woman perving on a young boy. i am 13.

so i think, maybe, thats how many of us here connect with spicy byler tumblr.

and now, of course, watching them grow up on my screen (having rejoined the fandom post s4) has been a very... interesting experience for me. i think byler sex discussion on here speaks volumes about how we are all from different walks of life. if i wasn't an art major who has literally been drawing naked bodies from life since I was 16 at school, and a psychology student, i might not understand how to discuss all this stuff. as it is, i've got too much emotional education under my belt, and i know how to embrace my shadow self as long as im not hurting myself or anyone else. (vecna would take one look at me and say NOPE lol.)

sorry for the ramble! thanks for hosting me.

p.s. sadly im not friends with that girl anymore, but this will always be a legacy of our friendship (plus the fact that she was so grateful for my pre-existing knowledge of 80s music lol. & we both bought corduroy sheepskin jackets immediately after watching s1, lucas KILLED it. fashion king)

Thank you for sharing your story and adding to the discussion!

Your cafe story raises so many interesting psychological ideas about the nature of storytelling and connecting to coming-of-age narratives or even writing it/creating it, as the Duffers have done. As you put it, "Even at 22 sitting in this cafe with my friend, browsing insta innocently, I could remember exactly what it was like to be 13 and my heart was just beating. Whenever i think of that crush on that boy, i am 13 again. i am not a grown woman perving on a young boy. i am 13. So i think, maybe, thats how many of us here connect with spicy byler tumblr," and I think there's a lot of intrigue there.

Even though your story is related to Finn IRL, I'd say a part of writing/reading a story is putting yourself in the shoes of the characters and seeing things from their eyes. And that includes temporarily "becoming 13 again" (or becoming the age of the characters you're exploring). And that's not creepy. It's just a part of the process. Art itself is messy and psychologically layered.

A lot of Bylers seem to believe the Duffers would be creepy for including a sex scene in S5, even with the characters aged up, because they watched Finn and Noah (and by extension Mike and Will) grow up. But really, it's all a part of them engaging with the coming-of-age themes they've set up and "becoming 17 again" to properly tell this story how it's meant to be told, wherever that journey takes them. And in the context of a gay coming-of-age tale, it just might include sexual exploration and discovery. *Gasps*

[bookishtheaterlover7]

Hi, everyone! Just wanna share this very short story fiction that i wrote. Just to have a little break on all of this stuff. I want to remain anonymous. I just copy paste this from my notes. Hope you enjoy the reading.😊😁

Short Story 2

  She was looking at the crowd filled with influential and powerful people. She was standing on the right side of her friend while listening intently to their conversations. A photographer passed by and take a few photos of them. She was wearing a dark blue slacks, a cream polo shirt paired with a white shoes. CE was behind her and keep staring at her ass. She can feel someone was staring at her because she gets a sudden sharp and warm feeling on her neck.

After that she feels a warm hands touching her butt. She was shocked and surprised. She wants to confront that person touching her but she don't want to get everyones' attention. 'WTF? IN A PUBLIC PLACE FULL OF PEOPLE? DAMN THIS PERVERT!'. Without him noticing, she quickly grab some of his fingers, squeeze it hard and bent it towards him.

CE: Ah, shit! Fuck! (He whispered silently so no one would notice)

She slowly turn back and look at the perpetrator and that anger her more.

CE  look at her with his eyes wide open.

She squeezed his fingers harder. CE bit his lips to control the pain.

You should keep your hands to yourself, she said.

And she pushed his fingers towards his stomach and shove him a little harder backward. He take a few steps backward to stop himself from stumbling. She then turns back towards and grumbled. CE just scratched his head on what happened.

N🫶nnie... This is such a cute short story!!!

And a pretty good distraction from what's going on...

You can send more if you'd like. I wouldn't mind reading and sharing more of your writings. 😁

[nanabrainrot]

I love your Lalo work ! Do you think we could get some stories about the way people react to Lalo and the MC (from To Bear a Cross, Companion Dog, etc) ? Like what did the people he hurt (for her) do ? How do other characters in BCS feel about the two of them ? Are they weirded out by the relationship ? Again, love your work <3

THANK YOUUU i was actually working on that already and made a little compilation of moments where people went "hey wtf is going on with that guy and his wife so enjoy these blurbs with Kim, Jim, Nacho, and MC <3 I might repost these in a chaptered version on AO3 to fill up my Lalo tab lol - ty for the ask!!

A Moment with Kim

Jimmy was confused at the woman sitting across from him in his apartment, accompanied by Nacho of course, but Kim was even more so. A pair of deep eyes seemed fixed on Kim alone, her face devoid of expression. He could tell she was matured yet was not positive if she broke 30 yet with the lack of lines in her face and the lack of white or grays accumulating in contrast to the silver streaks in Lalo’s hair and his face lined with wrinkles. “Uhh, Nacho, care to explain the little lady that’s been sitting here in silence since you got in? I can’t be breaking confidentiality with Lalo of all people unless you want me dead in the desert with my own balls in my mouth.”

Nacho sighed, glancing at the woman, all dolled up, who still staring at Kim’s face who was now shifting uncomfortably.

“Don’t worry, she’s Lalo’s wife,” Nacho responded lowly, watching you sit still like a tree on a day without wind. Jimmy narrowed his eyes, looking toward her a little closer and realizing that Lalo did not have a ring but in fact had a tattoo of a ring. Her finger lacked a tattoo of a ring, but a large diamond was shining on her finger. He wondered the insane price of it given Lalo’s seemingly endless supply of money of questionable origin. His charming nature screamed “player” to Jimmy so the concept of him having a wife at home was something beyond his imagination, especially a woman as meek and docile as the jittery woman staring his wife down.

“Oh! I didn’t know he was married,” Jimmy laughed awkwardly, leaning over the coffee table to offer his hand to shake. Her eyes moved off Kim and to the hand that was extended but not up to Jimmy’s face, something that caught Kim’s attention. Her brows twitched a little and her hands that were on the arm of the chair came together to fold together. Moments pass. No handshake.

Awkwardly, Jimmy withdraws the hand and uses it to scratch his neck. The eyes around the room focus on Lalo’s wife and her ensemble. She wore a deep gray v-neck with a golden chain about her neck dipping into the fabric that exposed her chest and a pair of black flared pants, like a yoga instructor would wear.. The little mary janes peeked out from the flares, shiny and bright. Jimmy could just about make out a piece of gold about her ankles with something written on them. The hoops in her ears obscured by the hair draping over her shoulders and it seems like she had cut choppy bangs solely for the purpose of hiding her face.

“Um, so how are you Mrs. Lalo? What brings you here with my friend Nacho?” he coughs in that raspy voice still trying to grin through the thick air she seemed to bring with her.

“I’m okay,” she murmured, low and barely audible, “I just wanted to check on his bail and stuff… I don’t really leave without him and he sent Nacho to get me to come get some air and get updates from you.” Her eyes moved back to Kim, staring again, with deep eyes that seemed to lack any spark. It was like looking at the glass eyes of a doll. “His bail? The hearing is tomorrow so we can work from there,” Jimmy started, “but it might be millions for him on these charges. Sorry about that Mrs. Lalo, I’m trying my best rest assured.”

“Mrs. Salamanca,” you replied a little firmer than Nacho would expect from your quiet nature and prior encounters with you. Although his first encounter you appeared shameless in your actions, but he assumed you only had any trace of confidence when you were in Lalo’s presence. Your body without him was tense like ice and suddenly melted to a cool water when he came around. But he couldn’t come around. Not unless Jimmy stepped up and got him out on bail.

“Hm?”

“His first name is Lalo. His last name is Salamanca. You would call me Mrs. Salamanca,” she responded, her eyes still on Kim and her knees turning more toward the woman. The attention on Kim appeared confusing at first but as Kim and Jimmy shared glances, she leans forward and you keen with interest at it with a head tilt. Eye contact.

You give her eye contact, something you deny Jimmy and, she noticed, denied Nacho too.

“Would you rather me tell you?” You seem to relax at this offer, your body releasing the tension at something in the room. As if a breath you were holding finally left.

“Yes please. But you aren’t Lalito’s lawyer, you’re the lawyer’s wife, no? Is that okay?” you inquire, brows narrowed at the woman. Nacho and Jimmy share looks over you, realizing the source of the tension seemed to be that the two were men. You kept looking to Kim because she was a woman too.

Why though? It couldn’t be a fear of men; you laid in bed with one of the scariest ones Jimmy had ever met. He wonders this internally as he and Nacho eye you lean toward her with your hands cupping your knees and shoulders coming a bit forward. “Spousal privilege. What’s his is mine and what’s mine is his, including his business if there’s a need for it. It’s a bit hard for Jim – Saul to tell if you aren’t looking at him though because he can’t tell if you’re listening.” You avert your gaze, shifting like you’re suddenly embarrassed and your mouth twitches like you want to smile but can’t like. Like it hurts to smile.

“I know…” you mutter, scratching your neck sheepishly, “I don’t look at or talk to men. Lalito is jealous and I respect that.”

A pause. Kim’s body language changes in disbelief, “So Lalo doesn’t let you look at or talk to men?”

“It’s not that I’m not allowed to. I do it so he doesn’t get violent with them. He thinks every guy has a bad motive with me,” you reply, “so I just don’t look at or talk to men so he doesn’t get mad at the guy. He’s impulsive, Mrs. Goodman.”

“You can call me Kim,” she breathes, leaning back into her chair with a sigh like she’s trying to analyze your personality and meekness in relation to Lalo. The blonde glances at the two men and asks, “Can you two just like step into another room then so she isn’t trying to dodge looking at you? I don’t know how often she comes out so it’d be nice if she can look around freely.” Jimmy jumps at the opportunity to leave the room, looking relieved, and tugging Nacho by the arm into the adjacent bedroom.

“That’s a great idea, babe! I’ll be in here, haha, adios!” Jimmy salutes as he ushers Nacho, who is muttering in confusion and protest and the contact Jimmy is having with him as he closes the door. You can hear the muffled conversation between them, Jimmy’s chipper gravely tone against the cool harshness of Nacho’s serious voice.

The air is different without men. Without any cologne or harsh musky fragrances; it feels perverted to know what another man smells like no less what his hands feel like if you decided to shake his hand. Lalo probably would’ve swatted it away you consider. It was too risky to potentially displease him and it was a decision made out of respect. “Thanks Kim. Not many people notice I’m… hesitant around men.”

“No problem,” she smiles tensely with a feeling of pity in her belly starting to make it twist. Did Jimmy make mistakes? Sure, every man does, but she can only imagine the kind of man Lalo is to you. Your meek energy and refusal to address men plants a seed of worry in her she can’t ignore but must in order to proceed. “His hearing is tomorrow and they’ll set bail for him. Then he’ll pay the bail and be home and you two can head back to Mexico. They’re just setting it up and paying it,” she smiles warmly.

The tension doesn’t leave you. You look like every muscle was locked in place as you peer up with deep eyes through your lashes. The chain on your neck says Lalo, she realizes. As do the hoops in your ears. The four fingers that weren’t your thumbs had LALO in big letters painted onto your acrylic nails of square, milky white. “Okay, how long will it take, Kim?”

“Depending on how long the money takes to come in, a day to five days-“

Your brows furrow, then relax. You sink back into the chair like a disappointed child; you likely weren’t used to being apart Kim realized. The indicators of possession on you made her stomach queasy. He was charming, sure, but he did everything without much thought. He punished ruthlessly and frequently; what did that mean for you?

Then why did you miss him so much?

“Okay, Kim,” you murmur, “nothing else?” She swallows, realizing the weight of your presence. Some insane drug king pin’s wife who looked more like a doll than a human, actions so calculated it was like you were a ball joint doll who was being twisted by invisible hands. Your back so straight, hair without a flyaway, and the deep eyes looking but not seeing. Looking but not acknowledging. Like she was a chair or a table but not a human. Unimportant.

“Nothing. Just hope bail is reasonable and the money comes quickly,” she replies with a forced smile. A small hum of acknowledgement, before you lean closer to her a bit over the coffee table but her behind still stuck to the less than luxurious chairs you seemed to be used to. “Can you call out and let Ignacio I’m ready to go home? I don’t talk to men, you know that now.”

The pit grows deeper. Lalo seemed to like you, why else would he tattoo a ring on? Drag you up from Mexico with him on business? Does he love you? Kim swallows and smiles. Does he hit you?

“Nacho, she said she’s ready to go home.”

 It’s stupid. To look at the window at you driving away, but your head still hangs low as Nacho opens the door for you. You slide into the seat like your body made of liquid. Like you’re a doll. He closes the door, glancing up at Kim’s watchful eyes through the window above, and shrugs, as if to say: I don’t know either. Kim just wondered if she wanted to know.

She holds Jimmy a little tighter tonight, grateful for something she didn’t have for once.

A Moment with Nacho

On the drive home, Nacho only hears you sniffle. Turned from him all girlish with your knees facing the window as if you were one of his girls all mad at him. But you aren’t mad, just frustrated, that much he can tell. Your first meeting had been awkward but had been steered like a ship by Lalo who would ask you to do something and you would do it. Nacho wonders if you would hesitate if Lalo asked you to stand up and put a knife in your side.

You don’t behave awkwardly despite being seen like that, with eyes all narrow and wet. You loom around Lalo naturally as if his shadow. He wondered about you, thoughts picking at him as he drove to your temporary home with Lalo. Nothing was out of place thanks to you. Febreezes and diffusers listlessly filled the air with subtle scents that mask your probably expensive perfume. Again, your eyes flit sporadicallly as you take in the house when you get in. Nacho can tell you’re fidgety again which is likely from your anxiety being apart from Lalo. You scurry off to your room with no words nor glance, just the sound of your shoses clanking then socked feet padding to your depressingly big and cold bed toward the back of the house past the living room. A door slams and it’s so quiet he still hears you weep.

There’s no way you were right.

The way you existed as a moon of Lalo’s, as his shadow, his sex doll, Nacho wondered if any of your life wasn’t based around keeping him happy. Did you go to college? What was your favorite book? Do you have any hobbies?

The sobs lull down to sniffles he hears as he settles in the sofa to enjoy another sleepless night protecting Lalo’s wife. He fears he knows the answers, in your one word responses: no, no, and no.

 A Moment with Jimmy

Jimmy is surprised that Lalo feels anything at all.

Him coming out of the courthouse, a free man, already had you in tears. Your face obscured by hair as you frantically got out of the passenger, only because Lalo opened the door, and threw yourself to his chest. Your arms were tight on him, like he was going to vanish at any second, and, despite the distance, he could hear small and whining sniffles. “Shhh, only some days not too bad huh?” he coos, petting her head before laying a loud cartoonish kiss on her head still buried in the florals of his loud button-up.

“So long, Lalo,” Jimmy could barely make out the muffled mumbles as Lalo pushed you by the shoulders. He had heard from Nacho that you weren’t necessary very expressive but when seen talking abt Lalo you tended to break. Often your conversations had to be initiated by someone else and often you only uttered soft one word responses: yes, no, or the occasional I don’t know. He never got a clear look at your face until now and he feels like he saw something he shouldn’t have just seeing your expressionless face all warped with tears. It lacked the perfect makeup you often had but you still looked so put together; no doubt luxurious treatments and products kept the flesh of your face so clear with the rich man rubbing at your biceps and kissing your forehead.

The big hoops he had seen replaced with little studs that looked like initials and your nightgown looked like a black sundress and fuzzy slippers showed your perfect, pedicured toes. He slams the passenger shut and opens the backseat for you, which you sniffle and scoot into immediately, like an instinct.

You were pliant and reacted to things like a reflex, as easy as blinking or breathing, you slip into the backseat and look out the window at him after settling into your seatbelt. Sheepish, wanton, and distraught. Jimmy had seen starving strays look less longingly at dangling meat.

“Thanks for making that trip for me, Mr. Goodman. You go home to enjoy your wife and me,” he grins a sly smile and winks, “I’ll enjoy mine. Buenos noches!” It’s a dark red shirt with a pattern on it that Jimmy can’t describe as Lalo slips into the passenger. He looks all warm and giddy, that soulless grayhaired bastard, and only looks back at you as his driver pulls off. It makes his stomach sink, watching you interact.

The deep eyes all wet with tears over a man with a kill count he wasn’t sure was under a hundred and you, who wouldn’t look at a man unless asked to. He recalls the face Kim made talking to you, your face all expressive out of nowhere and your hands twitching at the suggestion he would be away for five days. Your cold demeanor desperate with Lalo, your fidgety hands finding their purpose in pawing at him and clinging to him. It was like watching an animal documentary showing animals mated for life, like watching an addict beg for a fix.

Your deep eyes never acknowledged him, he notes again. Actually, your eyes never acknowledged anything but Lalo. The deep eyes skipping past the lamp lights, the bricks, and pretty bushes to a man that had him crawling through a desert and killed a civilian. The world was an accessory and Lalo was the main event for you.

When Jimmy gets home, he gurgles his mouthwash and wonders about Kim and her love. Years together and their relationship was natural like breathing and it was healthy, in most respects. But he wondered about the suffocation of a love like that and wondered if any part of the fixation and obsession was worth what he put you through.

Listerine meets the porcelain then vanishes into the drain.

 

A Moment that Matters

You can feel the weight of pity on you. The way people see him linger with you. It raises a question if too nosey, a brow if they are feeling expressive. Jimmy looked at you in disbelief, you felt the eyes on your back. Reduced to tears after some days apart because he was impulsive, because your husband was brutal and cruel and a murderer but he was your husband. That vow, way back when, meant something even if you didn’t want it to.

With Kim, she almost looked disgusted. That white lady feminist jargon that pitied you for this choice, the life you had as if there was any other option. What else was there? Sometimes, there is a vague feeling of anger toward Lalo. He never held to your father, he always insisted, it was because of Eladio or Hector or a bad mood, but it changes. You often brew on a quote your father said in passing, back to you as he washed corn cobs in the kitchen, saying: “Happiness is a choice.” Happiness is a choice. You could wither and weep the rest of your sad life as some maiden that required saving or you could be happy, you could be a happy wife in a big house with a husband who loves you. Everything else could be blurred between the lines. It didn’t need an explanation, it didn’t need Kim’s judgement or Jimmy’s face.

But Nacho. Nacho’s reaction to you left a lot to think about. Nacho always buckled to the demands of others; it was for his father’s safety you understood. It was that way for you too, but he’s a baby in the game. Not positive how young he is, but obviously he was many years your junior. The moment he saw Lalo’s cum in your mouth, your cooing into his side when he got home. He knew you waited by the door for him when his days at work were lengthy. It brings some shame, but not regret. Maybe embarrassment. His shock is what bothers you, as you dozed only a little as he talked of his girlfriends to Lalo. Sometimes they say no.

No? How do you say no? To your man? Your husband? The backbone of your joys and lifestyle; you wondered if it was the same. Kim carried herself in a way that didn’t require Mr. Goodman’s consent or permission. He didn’t loom over her. She was her own and a wife.

It didn’t make sense that Nacho’s girlfriends could say no and not feel their stomachs churn with shame at denying their man his most base pleasures. It would be inhuman. It wouldn’t be wifely. His shock is gone when he brings you home, replaced by the calm of acceptance. It makes your heart sink, for some reason. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. There’s nothing wrong with this, what you have, what you’ve nurtured and watered and accepted.

Happiness is a reflex, like blinking or breathing, when you weep into Lalo’s arms as he shushes you. Coos over you like a sad dog because you are one. You’re not his wife, you once heard him say some years back over a glass of his strongest beer and your little glass of juice (it keeps you youthful), you’re his pet.

What a good way to be; a spoiled pampered dog disciplined with a shock collar until happiness is a reflex. Listening is a reflex. Peace is a choice, you confirm in your head, curled into his side that night as he stares at the ceiling (he’s so handsome like this). This is a good choice road.

[mk-writes-stuff]

For the askbox game! Can I get Nellie doing some dope spy stuff to check up on Rhys's daughter for him?

This one was actually pretty hard to do. Making the timing work out and avoiding any spoilers for Rhys’s plot arc was super hard, but here you go! I’m pretty happy with it :)

“You in position? Bella wants me to pop the cameras”

Nellie shook her head at the text. She knew Belladonna hated it when Cassie called her that, but there was no way to stop Cassie once she got going. “I’m in position,” she texted back.

“Wtf are you checking up on anyway?”

Nellie sighed. “Already told you I’m not telling.”

“Fine I’ll bug you later. Cameras going down now.”

The lights flickered infinitesimally for a half-second, then went back to normal.

She didn’t have long. Cassie’s camera-shorting trick wouldn’t last long, especially not since Nellie had asked her to expand it to more than just Belladonna’s rooms. Cassie had harassed her to know what she was doing, but she’d managed not to crack just yet.

The less Cassie knew, the better. It wasn’t Nellie’s secret to tell, and if Belladonna found out… well, she knew Belladonna would try to use it as a bargaining chip, and if she did that, poor Rhys would get caught in the crossfire.

Nellie slipped down the hallways, a pile of clothes in her arms, ponytail bobbing behind her. Sneaking, she’d learned the more she’d tried to do it, was very little like it was in the adventure books she’d just recently started reading. In the books, it was always about dark catsuits and crawling up vents. In reality, there was nothing that rendered you invisible quite like wearing a servant’s uniform and looking like you had a job to do.

She only ran into two people in the hallways, and neither of them paid her the slightest attention.

The room she was heading towards was locked, but the servants’ keycard opened it - it opened basically every room in the entire Upper Station. Nellie slipped in unnoticed and scanned the room, all done up in soft whites and lace.

In the middle of the room was a cradle, and inside the cradle was a baby.

Nellie had never seen a baby before. She was smaller than Nellie had expected, and very wrinkly. She was wearing a tiny white dress and stared up vacantly at the ceiling as though she couldn’t even focus her eyes. Come to think of it, Nellie wasn’t sure she could.

The wide grey eyes were all Rhys. The baby’s skin was darker than his, and her hair was plastered to her head in dark curls, but the eyes were his a hundred times over.

“Going to have to drop the cams soon, be quick.”

She didn’t have much time. She fumbled with her phone to take a holo-image of the baby for Rhys and hurried from the room before anyone could catch her.

*****

Rhys was waiting in the cafeteria on his short dinner break when Nellie found her way there. She slipped across the room to him and pulled out her phone to show him the holo.

Rhys made a choked sound. “She’s so small.”

“She has your eyes.”

“She does.” Rhys sniffed, and Nellie realized he was tearing up. “Thank you, Nellie. I just… I wish I could see her myself.”

“We’ll find a way,” said Nellie, hopefully.

In the distance, she felt a spark of… something. Resolve. Determination.

Belladonna.

“Something’s about to happen,” she said confidently. “And when it does, I’ll see what I can do. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Rhys hastily shoved the phone back to her as one of the guards waltzed into the room, and it vanished into Nellie’s dress - but not before she could see the text from Cassie. “I’m going to fucking kill that girl.”

“I have to go. I’ll see you soon.”

Rhys stood up and kissed her on the cheek. “I’ll see you soon.”

And Nellie was off again, because when Belladonna had a plan and Cassie wanted to kill her over the plan, it always meant something big was going to happen.

*****

And that’s a wrap! I hope you like it. I might actually use a modified version of this (with more spoilers lol) to start off one of the scenes of the novel, so thanks for the inspiration :)

[life-in-the-monster-haus]

you sound extremely white…. especially in your posts defending Gil and blaming shit on Lagoona, like….

your posts only convinced me even more that those two shouldn’t be together.

girls shouldn’t have to put up with racism for the sake of a guy and implying that lagoona should just go “that sucks 😢” whenever gil mentions his parent’s racism? Like wtf how is that a better lesson for kids than her wanting her boyfriend to stand up for himself? and if protecting lagoona from racism is oh so terrible for gil, just…. have them break up ffs. don’t encourage kids to stay in relationships like that where one has to endure racism for the other cus otherwise the person with racist parents gets punished.

Like, way to make it POC’s fault for racist parents being abusive to their kids? “it’s all lagoona’s fault cus she forced gil to take a stand against racism even tho his parents would punish him” like wow. you truly sound very white.

let’s also not gloss over the fact that you called Lagoona a bitch at one point for crying when Frankie asked her about boys. or you calling Draculaura a cow at one point too like wtf??? so maybe lay off the gendered insults for girls??? before jumping to the defense of a character POC dislike and who’s flaws you excuse as trauma cus you see yourself in him.

I'm gonna put this answer under a cut because some folks get cranky when I make long posts, even though there is a feature in your settings that can auto trim long posts, I get blamed anyways... it's easier to blame the person than to address the problem directly isn't it?... hey! that's kinda what happens to Gil! let's discuss.

Saying someone sounds white based off text and nothing else. 🚩🚩🚩

I'm Puerto Rican, thanks for asking. But I blamed shit on Lagoona because, some stuff was her fault, specifically stuff that put Gil directly in harms way. Maybe your cool with dumping your personal baggage on a disabled 16 year old but I'm not and no one should.

My posts were never written to prove that Gil and Lagoona are meant to be together, perfect for each other OR even good together, you're confusing me with a shipper, at most I've stated Gil is decent boyfriend material and I stand by that. The entire reason I write them is to prove Gil is an innocent and defend him from slander that this annoyingly prevalent sub-section of the fandom has been spreading that has absolutely NO basis in canon, if you read my posts like you claim to you'd have known that. I'm not really sure WHY Gil has become the fandom punching bag, Maybe it's because he's less masculine than the other MH guys? is it because he's Asian coded? is it because he needs a device to breathe? Maybe it's some unholy combination of homophobia, racism and ableism. fuck if I know, so I went looking: I watched hundreds of webisodes, days worth of movies and countless pages of teen wank in diaries so that y'all didn't have to and I put it in an easily digestible format but I guess that wasn't good enough for you hmm?

Girls shouldn't have to put up with racism for the sake of a guy. you're completely correct and I don't think I ever made that claim. UNFORTUNATELY saltwater people DO face racism in the G1 Monster High universe and Lagoona would face that same racism regardless if she was dating Gil or not. The racism isn't radiating from Gil, Lagoona says herself there is a long standing system of oppression against saltwater monsters which I covered here.

Also don't put words in my mouth, it's poor form- especially in a text based forum where people can go back and re-read everything we both said. I never once implied "that lagoona should just go “that sucks 😢” whenever gil mentions his parent’s racism" I said it was wrong of her to force him to tell his parents that he was seeing her, especially when she knew they had a threat hanging over his head. Also Gil doesn't just go around mentioning his parents are racist, it's just a fact that exists in this universe and when he IS forced to talk about it, it's always spoken with great shame. Like when he tried to dump Lagoona during the Gloom Beach arc, Y'all think they should have broken up? well here you go. Gil tried to break things off with Lagoona before they were even officially dating, he knew it was painful and tried to spare her. But she likes him and he likes her, so obviously that didn't work.

Gil DID stand up for himself, A LOT. I documented it WELL with pictures, links and colored words for emphasis! I practically spoon fed it to the reader from a silver platter, a child could understand it. If you read my review well enough to understand it to the point that you have a problem with it that you just HAD to tell me about, you'd know that. But clearly you gave my review as much attention as you gave canon because here is what happened in canon again since I don't think you listened the first time it aired or when I said it. In Episode 24 Gil defends Lagoona against Mr. Hack's bigoted statement that Sea Monsters are bad parents, they weren't even dating at that point they were just classmates. He defends Lagoona directly again in Volume 2 where he speaks directly to his parents (Probably his Father?) On the phone in front of Lagoona. THAT phone call? got him sent to a Boarding school far away as punishment for defying his parents wishes and wanting to be with Lagoona and he was there for the entire summer and half of the next school year. They are still TECHNICALLY not dating by this point they are just hanging out and into each other - even without the reward of Lagoona, Gil STILL stood up for her, got punished for it and came back for more because he directly defends Lagoona to his racist parents AGAIN in Volume 3 where Lagoona isn't there, it's just him and his parents so you know how he feels is genuine and not performative, there's a whole episode about it called "Defending your Lagoona" ... I didn't even need to write what I did, the episode should have been enough proof but clearly no one pays attention to either canon or context because some key component of understanding clearly got lost in translation. I'm gonna ASSUME that most of y'all just haven't watched G1 in literally 9 years and have FORGOTTEN the subtle things that make Gil a good kid, it's like y'all watched the first half of skull shores and were like "Wow, Gil is a piece of shit!" - without finishing the movie to know that he saved everyone in the end. People cite Gil being "wishy washy" or "spineless" as reasons why they don't like him, but the shit this kid has been though? He could be getting flogged off screen like Jesus in "the Passion of the Christ" for defying his parents for all we know: he's scared of his parents for a reason but he has been ALWAYS loyal to Lagoona and he stood up to Mr. Hack, Farnum and his own parents for her... the kids spine is made of iron. Some of y'all can't get your man to take a shower for you meanwhile Gil is out here chewing bigots a new one for Lagoona.

Rebelling against your parents prejudice and wrong beliefs to live a life that makes you happy is a GREAT message for kids to learn.

"if protecting lagoona from racism is oh so terrible for gil, just…. have them break up ffs. don’t encourage kids to stay in relationships like that where one has to endure racism for the other cus otherwise the person with racist parents gets punished."

Do you want to watch a show where they are constantly pining for each other because they can't be together? Because I don't... If I wanted to torture myself with love that is there but also isn't there I'd watch Miraculous. Lagoona also never endured any racism directly at the hands of the Webbers, she was just told not to date their son and they didn't even tell her themselves, Gil was always the messenger and he softened the blow as much as he possibly could. while it sucks that she keeps getting bad news it's not really quite the same as experiencing it first hand. But any story-line where the racists get what they want is a bad story-line.

"Like, way to make it POC’s fault for racist parents being abusive to their kids?"

... Did you seriously just try to tell me that G1 Lagoona is a person of color. Blonde haired, green eyed, beach waved hair, light skinned, tiny nosed, Australian, voiced by a white woman, Lagoona... is a person of color... I'm not saying that any of these traits in of themselves automatically makes G1 Lagoona white OR that people of color can't have any of these traits. I'm just saying that all of them PLUS how she's handled in the show with her privileged Yacht owning parents AND the sheer nerd rage from fans at her being Latina in G3 and thus "no longer white" are things that make her white. I know many people have head-canons that shes Aboriginal and that would be fantastic if it was true. But let us not give Mattel too much credit to think that far ahead. for all intents and purposes, G1 Lagoona is white.

HOWEVER, what she is going through IS a common struggle among people of color and I think Mattel did this intentionally to avoid torturing an actual person of color. Little brown kids get subjected to racism enough, they don't need to watch the cartoon mermaid go through it too. or maybe now I'm the one giving Mattel too much credit they probably just wanted to show "Look! white people have it tough too!"... Honestly? this whole allegory would have worked better if Lagoona was a dude and Gil was gay. None of you would have dared to force Gil out of the closet if Lagoona was a dude and his parents were homophobic, but for some reason because it's racism and not homophobia it's okay!? to put Gil at risk!? Would y'all be like "Maybe if Gil just wasn't into men he wouldn't have these problems!" being homeless because of being gay and being homeless because of racism is STILL being homeless, he gets disowned either way.... Make it make sense folks, because it doesn't. Didn't an actor recently get forced out of the closet and it was widely regarded as an awful thing? So why are we so gung-ho to make Gil tell his racist parents he's dating a girl he knows they won't like? Would you do that to him if he was gay and wanted a boyfriend? probably fuckin' not.

I never said everything was Lagoona's fault she is ALSO young and still learning, but somethings were - like him getting sent to boarding school. I realize that Lagoona is a fandom darling and most of y'all's precious little meow meow but she was wrong for that. And I don't hate that, I LIKE that we get flawed characters! Do I love it? No! she was wrong! BUT I LIKE that she was wrong, part of being young and learning is screwing up and making mistakes! we deserve complex characters who aren't perfect in every way. Being pushy and assertive is part of what makes Lagoona a compelling character - but it got someone hurt in this instance and she should learn from that... THAT is good writing... and it's one of the rare instances of good writing we get with these two but I'll get to that in a minute.

"let’s also not gloss over the fact that you called Lagoona a bitch at one point for crying when Frankie asked her about boys."

Once again putting words into my mouth, By making this statement it LOOKS like you read Page 2 of my media analysis but did you though? because context is SUPER important. I did not call Lagoona a bitch for crying, I called her a bitch for being mean to Frankie. Frankie went to Lagoona whose supposed to be their friend for advice but instead Lagoona made it all about her and was then sarcastic to Frankie's plight because her problem is worse and She's aiming for the gold medal of the Pain Olympics. I hate the pain olympics, there are no winners, only losers.

"you calling Draculaura a cow at one point too like wtf??? so maybe lay off the gendered insults for girls???"

And why DID I call Draculaura a cow?... Was it because she was cheating on her black boyfriend with a white guy? 3 seconds after he walked off screen!? because I'm pretty sure it was because she was cheating. once AGAIN we are in a situation where context is important! In the exact same page just discussed I took an entire sidebar to explain why Draculaura was being a cow. I have absolutely zero respect for cheaters and I could have (and should have) called her a lot worse. I'd also like to say that as far as insults for girls go? Cow is fairly mild I could have called her another C word that is frequently used against girls but I went with cow to keep it classy~. also side note: there are male cows, I think they're called Steers... but it's still a cow. Anyways I don't think you really care what I call Draculaura, I think you're now just trying to paint me out as some type of misogynist... which, just proves you don't follow me or know anything about what I preach here you're just mad that I defended a boy whom you're assuming is white.

"before jumping to the defense of a character POC dislike and who’s flaws you excuse as trauma cus you see yourself in him."

UHM... I don't recall reading anywhere that Gil is disliked by POC specifically!?!?! I can't track the barometrics of Monster High tumblr... In fact from what I can gather if TikTok & Twitter are anything to go by most of the people who are hating on Gil are overwhelmingly white... but at the same time I'm not polling anybody either. But just for the record I'm Latine and my friend who helps me out with MH & Gil lore, @peppapigvevo isn't white either... Sooo if your point is that POC are the ones who don't like Gil... I'm here to tell you that POC are also the ones defending him.

But Gil canonically doesn't really have a ton of flaws and the tiny ones he does have stem from him being young and inexperienced, frankly I wish he had more, it would give people a legit reason to hate on him instead of their reasoning now which boils down to: "His parents are racist and even though HE isn't racist I'm gonna blame him anyways because someone on social media told me to and I haven't watched the show in a decade so my memory of the lore is fuzzy at best but I saw Lagoona cry once so Gil MUST be the bad guy!." Which... Y'all are expecting perfection from Gil and that's a ridiculous standard for anyone to live up to let alone a 16 year old boy. But I'm not like... making up trauma for Gil, based on how much he fears his parents THAT is a trauma response that they have instilled in him, it's there I didn't invent it. healthy normal kids don't fear their parents the way Gil fears his, I can only assume he is afraid because they have given him a reason to be afraid. a statement I have also said, several times, in my posts that you claim to have read and take issue with.

Was Gil and Lagoona's relationship written extremely well? No. But do I think Mattel should have never touched the issue of racism in their show? also No! it took a lot of guts to put a story about prejudice in a kids cartoon and MH is for little kids, their target demographic is 6-11yr olds, obviously MH skews a bit older, otherwise none of us would be here. But I'm glad they covered this topic, I don't much care for shows that shy away from scary issues or talk to kids like they're stupid because kids aren't stupid, they're little proto humans who learn things way faster than we do and we should treat them as such. Not only did they touch the topic they did so with a main character and they didn't sugar coat it! we saw the pain Lagoona AND Gil went through because of his parents racism. Touching this topic at all is huge, was it perfectly handled? absolutely not! they never actually resolved the issue, Gil's parents never learned a lesson, got comeuppance or accepted Lagoona, Gil never got to date the girl he likes with family approval there was always something looming in the background. which is... fine?... things aren't always wrapped up nice and pretty with a bow in real life, sometimes things are messy. However, one thing that bothered everyone, including me was towards the end of G1 the writers didn't really know what to do with Lagoona and Gil so they just kinda... rehashed the same fight 3 or 5 times... it happened in the webisodes, diaries and the movies. and that's sloppy on the writers part, the same fight being milked for drama isn't Gil's fault and shouldn't be blamed on him... but it is. Gil is just the messenger and y'all shot him on sight.

Mattel:

Gil:

However, that wasn't the end. Gil and Lagoona may not have got the fairy tale ending some people think they deserve or the tragic breakup that other people think they deserve but they did get closure. Gil's Mansters diary takes place after the events of 13 wishes and his parents wrote out a list of chores for him to do while they are out on a trip and before he goes to stay with Deuce for the weekend and the last thing he SAYS they put on the list is as follows:

"+ Don't date Lagoona. They didn't actually write that. I just know what they're thinking. Actually, we don't really talk about that directly very much anymore. We kind of just agree to disagree, especially since Lagoona was wished into a freshwater monster and back again. I think they saw how miserable I was during that whole time, and I believe it made some kind of an impact.. hopefully."

and that was how the saga of Gil, Lagoona & The Webbers ended. Not with a roar but with a whisper. It's also canonical proof in his own words that Gil was, in fact miserable during 13 wishes just in case anyone doubted it after my review.

It's not a happy ending or a sad ending it's not even a peaceful ending. it's an uneasy cease fire... which is good enough? I suppose. Gil's parents love him enough to let it go (after both Lagoona and he endured great personal struggles), They know he's dating Lagoona and he knows they don't like that, Lagoona knows they don't like it, I'm sure Lagoona isn't welcome over for dinners or anything but the issue has been dropped. Gil and Lagoona can finally date, no strings attached.

I'm sure that's not the ending you would have written, my very grumpy anon. But relationships are complex and sometimes the solutions to their problems are complex too but love finds a way to triumph over bigotry.

And that is a message that we could all learn from.

[standardquip]

Gungrave live reactions

for the entire series CW: sexism(?), racism(?), vulgar language, I am a 36 year old man who did not censor my thoughts as I was watching it. This took a little over a month and is just a compilation of discord messages I sent

gotta say the opening scene of the first ep is great I wish his name wasn't "Brandon Heat" though I'm sorry but that's a lame name Especially for an anime ok his anime name is "Beyond the Grave" Glad we got that established

I'm about 2/3 through the first ep and this is definitely a 90s anime 😂 (not that there's anything wrong with that)

gungrave ep 2 They named the black kid kenny I will be very surprised if kenny doesn't die this ep

someone died in ep2 It was not kenny I am genuinely shocked here's to ep3

kenny has finally died But so did a lot of other people RIP Kenny

It's going a lot harder (emotionally) than I was expecting, given the first ep I'm just starting ep4 now

so far my biggest problem with gungrave is that brandon seems like a mute character but he talks sometimes But the times he talks make no sense, they're not really that important So the whole decision to not talk a lot seems super awkward instead

yeah edgy teen show is definitely ep 1 and not any ep after that (so far) (I'm only on ep 4)

another thing that bugs me is all the pans are weirdly fast but the mute/not actually thing brandon does bugs me way more than the pans

ep6 I like harry more than brandon didn't anticipate that

oh god the audio delay on this ep is horrible I hope it's just this one ep and not the rest of them

ep11 of gungrave bold strategy, cotton.gif let's see if it pays off it only worked out because of plot armor

ep12 of gungrave Brandon got a hair cut and looks like a real yakuza now

… I hate it

gungrave ep14 normally I don't care about fictitious relationships or how problematic they are but maria has convinced herself she loves her grandfather, who raised her, because brandon broke up with her and orchestrated a perfect moment And now she's pregnant by her grandfather and like this is scummy in so many different ways but mostly I just feel kinda 😩 about what it says about maria's intelligence in fact all the women in this series (actually now that I think about it, there is literally ONLY TWO) are just really fucking dumb

ep14 has some real beautiful compositional symbolism (unsure if that's the accurate term) Harry wears white and brandon wears black harry is in the shadow and brandon isn't harry tries to get brandon to betray the family and of course brandon won't. He goes to shoot harry. But doesn't and starts crying the gun lands precisely in the middle. Implying brandon's thinking about it? Or maybe it's just for symmetry. idk

this scene really slaps you over the head with symbolism. I don't care. I'm a fan

damn this show took a fucking turn

oh good just in time for Harry's break down ep15 is where the grey haired brandon comes in!

Maria is the dumbest bitch ever "I just found out brandon is alive! Oh I didn't see him myself. An aide of mine said they talked to him" Maria: Cries from happiness "Oh just knowing he's alive is enough!" bitch please supernatural stuff isn't known in this canon do you just believe everything you're told? wtf This is some pregnancy psychosis shit

damn you think Harry went crazy with power but he really went crazy with power

damn what's in this suitcase that makes it weigh so much ep18 brandon finally comes out of a coma

ep18 is where ep1 left off

while watching gungrave I had some fever memory recollection of an anime called Heat Guy J So I looked it up It seems to be a combination of robocop and minority report?? Also it has a werewolf apparently

ep22 of gungrave I think I can fit this in before I need to leave this is totally gonna end with mika, who is like 17, dating brandon/grave if it doesn't, I'm gonna be surprised so all three women in this show will get with dramatically older guys and also be stupid idiots

hm ok brandon/grave only has 10 days of life left unless they magically come up with a different way to make him live so there's 2 eps to figure that out and/or have sex we'll seeeeeeeeeee oh, 4 eps actually Whatever anyway I'm out for a few hours to the family function

gonna attempt to finish gungrave I'm starting ep 23 of 26 gonna play them at 1.5x normal speed good mika (16ish) professes her love for grave (40+, died once) and grave is like "I'll be your guardian and protect you but that's all" Good We don't need yet another pedo relationship in this anime

ep24 "promise me you won't die before me" the girl who married a guy 30 years her senior says 🙄 oh I guess this was foreshadowing She got shot and died

grave is literally falling apart like bad pottery ep25

lmao harry, the guy who has no issues murdering literally anybody, swerved to avoid a cat in the road

the crash from the cat was so bad his whole life flashed before his eyes. This ep was a huge flashback oh grave's hair is white instead of grey now I guess because he's almost dead… again ep26 Last one

it's over they killed eachother

[bobbyfiend]

9/11 stuff

I'm old enough that I had my own apartment on 9/11 and got up to watch the news as I often did. The first tower was burning. My girlfriend came over later and we were horrified at what was going on, then got way more horrified when the second plane hit.

Like I said, I was an adult. Throughout that day, listening to newscasters and talking heads doing the 24-hour news reblogging and bloviating, it hit me pretty hard (and I told said girlfriend and another friend or two who were around): We're about to lose a lot of rights, and it's going to be worse for minorities.

Later, I saw the invasion of Afghanistan, then Iraq. As a conservative (back then) I worked hard to understand the president's rationale, even though I voiced several concerns to people I knew. I didn't understand just how dishonest and morally bankrupt those wars were until a few years later, even though I did understand that our best intelligence said that Saudi Arabia was much more heavily implicated in the attacks than Afghanistan or (WTF) Iraq.

Even in the immediate aftermath, though, and even being God-Fearing Christian Conservative White Man, I knew the PATRIOT act was a massive handover of citizen privacy and power to extremely questionable leaders, that government responses to the (few and small, I thought) protests were unjustified assholery, that the Department of Homeland Security would be a fucking nightmare we'd never be rid of, and that the TSA was an abomination make-work program for people who will rubber stamp anything with "security" or "police" in the title.

And for at least a decade, nearly every politician--including most Democrats--did exactly that: rubber-stamped everything jingoist. We got the aforementioned PATRIOT act, another one later, the TSA, DHS, FISA and similar fig leaves for the FBI and a dozen other agencies to abuse for two decades (and counting), legalization of spying on citizens (remember when that was controversial? When it looked like the CIA and NSA might actually have some legal consequences for breaking the law hundreds of millions of times?), seizure of land for "security," crushing of constitutional rights "near the border" (i.e., where over half of Americans live) for "security", Border Wall 3.0 (or whatever; we've been building them for decades) because "security," Guantanamo, torture, outsourcing torture to countries that don't have any limitations on prisoner abuse, Abu Ghraib, and on and on.

We lost a few thousand innocent Americans. That was awful and tragic. So we caused wars that led to the destruction of multiple functioning societies, the deaths of over a million people--most "collateral damage" from infrastructure disruption--and a much larger toll of physical, social, psychological, and community damage.

And we rolled the US several notches closer to a fascist police state.

Then, Obama! Yay!

Except he doubled down on almost everything Bush and the Angry Republicans (and also Democrats) had forced on us. Don't talk to me about Obama as a president; he was nearly as nightmarish as Bush.

Anyway, I remember 9/11 as the day the US started down a very dark path for its citizens and anyone dealing with it. We're still on that path. We've still got the institutions rammed in after 9/11 hanging around our necks.

[nientedal]

for the fic writers ask meme, i’m rather curious about 9 & 10; which of your fics did you find the easiest and hardest to write?

From this ask meme!

Which fic has been the hardest to write?

Each fic has its own challenges, but right now, it's probably a tie between Swansong and the Cold Fusion series. And for similar reasons! Both have complex plots - Swansong's is primarily emotional, with Megamind processing complex grief and a broken (and then new) mental link, and Roxanne processing having a roommate going through emotional turmoil, plus some mental stuff of her own...and then Metro Man's whole thing, and holy shit maybe there's still a chance, and mixing hope into the grief mix is just a fucking nightmare for everyone involved, and djf;aldjfa;ldjadflj;afjdj it's a mess. And because it's written in third person limited, rather than omniscient, there's only so much that I can tell readers directly. Which, in a story with so much happening internally, was...extremely frustrating, at times!

Cold Fusion's complexity is more events-based, but in that one I am having to balance the fact that there ARE external plotlines happening against the fact that...the primary focus of those fics is on the characters and their development. Also, for a LONG LONG TIME, I did not actually KNOW what the plot was, I was just sort of winging it, and now I DO know, and it's a lot bigger than I expected it to be? Which I think some people may not like. And on one hand, fuck 'em, I'm writing for me, but on the other hand, I do write fanfiction with my end goal being to share it with people, so my readers' enjoyment is absolutely a thing I have in mind, I'm not JUST writing for me. So, aaaaaaaaaaaa.

I am now also having to grapple with the fact that when I started writing Cold Fusion, many of my headcanons were different from what they are now. I was originally very set on it being canon-compliant, on ONLY working with things we knew from the source material and not doing my own worldbuilding more than was absolutely necessary. And then I fell into a depression hole for like 3 or 4 years and could barely force myself to write at all, and when I finally came blasting out of that hole on the Wellbutrin-fueled jet pack I titled Dive, the amount I cared about "canon compliant" had plummeted to pretty much zero. Writing Swansong helped with that, I think -- I had basically been writing nothing but Cold Fusion for AGES, and then Ramendobe slapped me in the face with that prompt, and I discovered that writing universe alterations was a lot of fun! And then Dive punted my desire to stay canon-compliant into the sun. So now, rewriting Cold Fusion as I post it to AO3, I am working with characters who are different from the way I now write them in other fics. I'm bringing some of my newer headcanons into that universe for shits and giggles, but still. It's an odd feeling.

Which fic has been the easiest to write?

Another tie! Because I cannot make decision.

By Chance, which I wrote because my buddy ElfKid dropped a prompt into my askbox when I was like, "holy shit the ADHD is BAD tonight and I wanna see if I can write a one-shot in one evening," I think...? aahahaha actually no I just went and looked it up, and I had tagged my 'weh ADHD sucks' post with #hey if anyone is reading this send me a writing prompt and let's see wtf happens when i can't motherfuckin think lmaoooo and...I basically sat down, put the best of black sabbath on loop, and waited to see what fell out of my hands. And it was that. (Here's the original tumblr edition.)

and everything emptying into white was originally just some tags I had put on an ask from another friend of mine about Megamind purring, and I couldn't stop thinking about them and that day at work just SUCKED ASS and so I copied and pasted them into an AO3 draft on my phone at work and churned that out over the course of my lunch break. And then added a bunch to it during the next couple days.

(and I gotta give an honorable mention to Dive. I basically churned that thing out in less than a week of HOLY SHIT I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ANYTHING IN YEARS AND MY BRAIN JUST WOKE UP AND REMEMBERED HOW TO ENJOY THINGS adrenaline, it was great. It wasn't as easy to write as the other two, simply because it wasn't as short & sweet, but it was easy and I owe that fic a lot. So.)