#BABE YOU’RE 56 NOW LOOK AT YOU

[chromedaddyofficial]

now why did sebastian call skid row’s songs gay? is he gay? 🤨

[littlemelaninfics]

Rough Night

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, Thruple Dynamic, Smut

It was 4:56 am when you flopped over in bed for what felt like the 100th time. You were on the verge of tears at this point because all you wanted was to sleep. You let out a frustrated whine that stirred the sleeping being next to you,

“Y/n. It’s 5 in the morning,” Buck said with his face still smushed into his pillow.

“I can’t sleep.”

He sighed deeply and turned on the bedside lamp; turning over to prop his head in his hand and look at you,

“What can I do?”

“Nothing,” you said with a furrow in your brow.

“Nothing?” He asked, trying to catch your eye. You briefly look at him before huffing and looking up at the ceiling,

“My mind won’t shut off.”

“What’s going on?” His brow started to furrow a bit. The thought of you being riddled with stress or anxiety gave him stress and anxiety.

“I don’t like him out there by himself. He should’ve called.”

Buck’s realization set in and he let out a small chuckle,

“Babe. He’s not alone,” he said reaching out to caress the side of your face.

“You’re not with him,” you said finally turning your head to him.

“It’s a simple call. They didn’t need me.”

“If it’s so simple then why hasn’t he called?”

“Aha. I don’t know. But if he hasn’t called now then it just means he’s on his way.” Buck barely got to finish the sentence when the deep click of the front door being unlocked sent shockwaves through your body. You spring leaped out of bed practically busting through the bedroom door like the Kool-Aid Man to race down the hall.

Your brain registered Eddie coming through the door, but failed to send the signal to your feet to stop,

“Whoa! Ha ha! Hi!” You jumped in his arms giving him no time to put his stuff down. The grip you had on around his neck looked lethal, but was filled with nothing than love and relief. You began peppering his neck and face with kisses until he finally caught you lips.

Buck came around the hall and smiled at the sight in front of him. Eddie walked the rest of the way through the door, shutting it and dropping his belongings. He wrapped his arms around you, kissing you deeply. He started to spin around and you had a giggle fit. You settled down quickly looking in his eyes,

“Hi.”

“Hi,” he stared at you for a couple more seconds before kissing you on the nose and putting you down,

“What are you still doing up?”

“She’s had a rough night,” Buck said coming up behind you.

“Oh yeah? Rough how?” Eddie said expressing slight concern. The look in his eyes made your stomach do the thing and you instinctively looked back at Buck. Not to look for approval, but you’re honestly not really sure why. He just nodded his head and you turned yours back to Eddie.

You’re still getting adjusted to expressing your feelings so you had a staring contest with his chest,

“I don’t like when you go on runs without him.” You slightly turned half of your body towards Buck before looking back to Eddie with a pout.

Eddie looked at Buck in such awe of the girl between them. He grabbed the sides of your face with both hands, pulling you into a sweet kiss. Suddenly you feel fingers tracing your arms before a wet, spongy sensation was being placed on both shoulders. Buck kissed from your shoulders to where the side of your neck connected, biting lightly then running his tongue over the slight sting.

You moaned at all of the attention you were getting when Eddie released the kiss and Buck turned your head, shoving his tongue in your mouth. Eddie took over where Buck left off and attacked the left side of your neck. He kissed down to the exposed skin on your chest peeking from your tank top before kissing down your clothed body.

When he was on his knees in front of you, you felt your shorts being pulled down now exposing the cotton panties you were wearing. Eddie left open mouthed kisses both of your hip bones, teasingly lowering your panties. Buck’s hand wrapped around the side of your neck when you felt a slick strip being placed on your pussy.

You moan instinctively, breaking the kiss from Buck to look down at Eddie. Your chest was rising and falling so hard, but he looked up at you with his mouth never ceasing to stop. Letting out a low growl, he pulled your hips into his face even more. You let out an audible gasp when you reach for Buck’s hands and place them on your clad tits. He immediately began kneading and pinching at your hardening nipples. You rested your head back flush against his chest and closed your eyes.

Buck started to remove the straps from your shoulders when you felt Eddie’s hand scale all the way up your body and wrap around your throat, pinning you in the position. Your tank top was down around your midsection with a hand around your throat and kisses being placed randomly on your upper body.

Buck lifted the tank top up and off completely before teasing your lips with two fingers. You instinctively open your mouth, taking in the same fingers that have given you orgasm after orgasm. He pushes past the soft palate of your tongue until he feels your throat constrict around his fingers and fight against Eddie’s grip. You gag with his hand in your mouth earning a deep moan in your ear. He slowly pulls out, draping the string of saliva down your chin and letting it run down. He keeps doing that until he’s gathered enough for a nice streak to run between the valley of your breasts and down your stomach.

You are incredibly close to cumming when Eddie licks a full strip from your pussy up to the stream waiting for him. He stands up biting your shoulder just as roughly as Buck when he looks his partner in the eye. You couldn’t see Buck’s reaction, but you could guess what it was by the way you’re being flung over Eddie’s shoulder. He lands a nice slap to your ass before beelining for the bedroom. You look up briefly to see Buck right behind, taking off his shirt with a smirk.

You only heard the door close, but the neighbors heard everything else.

[be4chywritez]

tie the knot | logan sargeant

logan sargeant x piastri!reader

You and Logan officially tie the knot.

masterlist!

beachy’s notes🐚: reader is adopted

Logan had been in love with you since the day you punched another kid for calling him a loser.

That was when you were 12 and he was 13. Oscar teased him about it endlessly until Logan finally mustered the courage to ask you out. He remembers it so clearly.

You were both sitting on the dock of a lake where your parents had organized a get-together. Oscar had gotten bored of staring at the water and wandered off. Logan looked over at you and asked, "Have you ever had a boyfriend?"

You looked over, flushed, and shook your head. "No."

"Do you want a boyfriend?" he asked, his eyes flicking nervously to your lips. You scooted closer, your knees brushing against each other, both of you blushing at the contact.

"I think I do," you said, avoiding eye contact and staring off into the water. You heard him take a shallow breath.

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

You whipped your head towards him. "You want me to be your girlfriend?" you asked, shocked because the boy you’d had a crush on since you were twelve was asking you to be his girlfriend.

"Yeah, I thought you liked me," he said, flushing deep red and scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

"I do!" you blurted out too quickly. You cleared your throat. "Um, yeah, I do. I want to be your girlfriend." You smiled, and he let out a breath of relief.

"Oh, thank God. I was nervous you didn't like me and that would be—"

You cut him off with a kiss. You weren't sure if you were kissing him right, your lips awkwardly pressing against his. He didn't pull away, but his hands hesitated before gently holding your arms. You pulled away, both of your cheeks flushed. "Was that good?" you asked, feeling slightly embarrassed.

"Yeah, it was good," he smiled, looking just as flustered as you felt.

You both went back to watching the lake, sitting closer together now, your shoulders touching shyly. Occasionally, you pointed out a fish flopping in the water, stealing glances at each other and giggling nervously.

Logan watched you talk to Lily, both of you wearing smiles on your faces. You waved goodbye to her as she walked back to the side of Alex’s garage.

Looking back up, you noticed Logan watching you, and you flushed. Even now, he never failed to make you blush. He leaned against the counter, a relaxed smile on his face. “Hey, babe,” he said, reaching over to peck your lips.

“How are you feeling today?” you asked as he pulled away, your hand running along his arm.

“I think we can get up to at least P15,” he said, meeting your gaze and letting out a sigh.

You grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it. “You’re going to score points. I know it,” you said, giving his arm one last squeeze before he was beckoned to his car by the engineers.

You let out a breath, watching him get into the car. Quickly, you sent Oscar a text, knowing he wouldn’t see it until later.

Good luck, Oz. Love you.

Slipping on the headset, you listened in to the engineers. Each time Logan overtook another car, your heart squeezed, and your hands gripped your handbag tightly. By lap 56, Logan was in P10. Nico tried overtaking him, but Logan defended his position brilliantly. You shot up from your seat, cheering, and his mechanics did the same, celebrating his performance.

A few engineers came over to hug you as well. When Logan returned, drenched in sweat, he received pats and hugs from the pit crew members. Making his way towards the back of the garage, he smiled at you. “I’m all sweaty, babe,” he said.

“I don’t care, Logan,” you replied with a smile, pulling him into a hug. You whispered into his ear, “I knew it.”

He pulled away slightly, staring at you with a look of realization and love. In that moment, he knew he was going to propose.

-

You threw a pillow at Oscar’s face. “What should I wear, pants or a dress?” you asked.

He sat up, rubbing his eyes. “Aren’t you just going to dinner?”

You rolled your eyes. “Knowing Logan, he’s going to want to dip his toes in the water.”

Oscar hummed in agreement. “Dress,” he decided, pulling out his phone to text Logan.

She has no clue. Stop stressing.

Logan replied quickly.

What color is she wearing? I want to match.

Oscar groaned. “Gross, happy couples,” he muttered.

You peeked your head out of the bathroom. “What?”

He flushed. “Nothing.”

“So, how do I look?” you asked, stepping out fully dressed. Oscar looked up from his phone lazily, giving you a thumbs-up.

You groaned, throwing another pillow at his head. “You are literally no help.”

Just then, the doorbell rang, and your mom called out that Logan was here. You dashed out of your room, making your way downstairs quickly.

Logan looked dashing, his shirt matching your dress perfectly. He held a bouquet of flowers and smiled warmly when he saw you. “For you, my love,” he said, handing you the flowers.

You pecked him on the lips and handed the flowers to your mom. “Mom, can you put these in water?” you asked.

She nodded, smiling. “Of course. You two have fun.”

Logan walked you to his car, opening the door for you. Once he got into the driver’s seat and started the car, you looked over at him. “So, where are we going?”

“Well, I got us dinner reservations, and then we can go for a walk on the beach,” he said, pulling away from the driveway.

After dinner, Logan drove you to a secluded part of the beach. The moonlight reflected off the water, casting a silvery glow over the sand. He took off his shoes, and you followed suit, both of you walking barefoot along the shore, the cool water lapping at your feet.

As you walked, you noticed a set of candles arranged in a heart shape on the sand ahead. You laughed, nudging Logan playfully. “Looks like someone’s getting proposed to tonight,” you joked.

Logan smiled, his eyes twinkling. “Yeah, it does, doesn’t it?”

You turned to look at him, and your breath caught in your throat. Logan was down on one knee, holding a small box in his hand. “Y/N Piastri,” he began, his voice filled with emotion, “from the moment you stood up for me ten years ago, I knew you were someone special. You’ve been my rock, my best friend, and my greatest supporter.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as he continued. “We’ve grown up together. You make me a better person; I can’t imagine my life without you. You are my everything, and I want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you make me.”

He opened the box to reveal a beautiful ring. “Y/N, will you marry me?”

You nodded, your hands covering your mouth in shock and joy. “Yes, Logan! Yes, I will marry you!”

He slipped the ring onto your finger and stood up, pulling you into a tight embrace. You kissed, feeling the magic of the moment surround you. The awkwardness of your first kiss was a distant memory, replaced by the deep, unwavering love you shared.

Suddenly, you heard cheers and claps coming from behind the nearby dunes. You turned to see your family and Logan’s family emerging from their hiding spots, all of them beaming with happiness. Oscar was at the front, a proud smile on his face.

“Oh my god, you all were in on this?” you asked, laughing through your tears.

Oscar walked up to you, pulling you into a tight hug. “Of course we were. Logan wouldn’t have it any other way.”

You hugged him back, feeling a surge of gratitude and love. “Thanks, Oz. This means so much to me.”

Oscar pulled back, a teasing glint in his eye. “Just remember, you still owe me for all the times I covered for you two.”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Deal.”

Your three sisters ran up to you next, each one taking turns to hug you tightly.

Logan stood back, watching the interaction with a warm smile. He shared a look with his own family, who were all just as thrilled. Your mom and dad approached, hugging both of you tightly.

“We’re so proud of you both,” your mom said, her voice choked with emotion.

Logan’s parents joined in, his mom wiping away tears. “Welcome to the family, Y/N,” she said, her smile radiant.

The moment was beautifully chaotic, with everyone talking, hugging, and celebrating at once. As the group settled down, Logan looked down at you, watching as you animatedly talked to your sister. In that moment, he knew he had made the right decision.

[teopatra]

✨ pick a number reading✨

Hola, me llamo es T’Asia I go by Teopatra. Grand water trine babe, lifepath 8 & Scorpio stellium. I’m a Leo sun and was sick for my bday so I wasn’t able to embody the Leo energy for my season sooooo, here I am now on the first day of Virgo season exercising my creative muscle lol

How do others feel about you?

(Can be platonic or romantic) feel free to pick more than one message

Enjoy xoxo 💋 teo ✨

Group # 1 :

you make people nervous or you get nervous when you realize someone is staring at you or has a crush on you and when you get nervous, it turns people on LOL people love to see you sweat because everyone looks at your reactions to things to compare how they feel, but you’re pretty attractive to a lot of people & may not even realize it some people wish they could cuddle/sleep next to you literally not in an intimate type of way just a romantic type of way or people could want to know what you look like when you sleep lol you give Angel baby vibes.

Pay attention to angel numbers 123 12:34 and 1:23, 😵‍💫 emoji or 📲 emojis

If you’re going thru your Saturn return , take note of your half birthday, also go back in your camera roll 6 months or to any November if any year and check your notes from 2020.

Signs: Pisces, cancer, libra, Capricorn or you know someone from that sign or nah dislike these signs

Group # 3 :

you have a warm nature and a nice looking physique I’m getting you don’t have the typical body whatever that means like you’re not a BBL IG figure you have a frame that makes people want to hug you or be near you because your energy is comforting. Someone or there’s a few people who have crushes on you and a small group of people may talk about how you look good and they be may be super nice to you and you kind of find it weird then it dawned on you 😂 that they like you people always want to touch your hands or share a pencil is what 😆.

Pay attention to angel numbers 333 and 5:55, 6:56 and 1:27 or that could be your bday

Lifepath 8s, the 🐸 emoji or lots of butterflies

Aries , gemini, Taurus or lifepath 7’s check camera roll from January or February, Aquarius season is significant

Group # 8 :

Other, see you as they’re saving grace like just when I feel like giving up, you save the day and you make them realize there’s more to life than was keeping them down people want to know how to be confident like you and I want to learn from you, but they feel stupid for asking for help. You may be expressed expressive are open with your emotions. Why people may know you to cry and random situation even though you’re not sad and that makes them laugh or smile because you’re just so silly and funny and cute.

Emojis 🐄, ❤️‍🩹, and 📿🩸. Your school colors can be red or that’s your favorite color.

Lifepath 2 and 7. Signs can be Aquarius, Taurus, libra, Leo, Scorpio or Sagittarius or check where these are in your chart for more messages

Check camera roll for April, angel numbers 11:11 or double numbers and reflective numbers like 12:21, 22:10, 22:11, 21:12 or 636 / 636 can be your area code iykyk lol

[c-h-i-m-es]

-idyllic

itoshi sae x gn! reader

11:56 pm 

you finally finish and submit the assignment due four minutes later. you stretch your arms up and close your laptop. 

feeling like you’ve been sitting in your desk and typing in your laptop for what felt like forever, you think of taking a walk and grab something to drink to refresh yourself.

you put on your hoodie on and grab your phone, wallet and the keys. locking the door behind you, you walk out your apartment and walk down to a twenty four hour store.

it is late but there are street lights providing the lights and you just hope you don’t run into some stranger you don’t wanna encounter. as you reach the store, you tell the guy behind the counter your order, your favorite boba flavor in a large size.

being the only person they are serving, you just have to wait a few minutes before they call you to get your drink. you pay for your order and walk down the road.

the night time is quite chilly so you put your one hand inside the pockets of your hoodie and take sips of your drink while you walk to a park nearby. you walk near the small playground in the park and see a figure sitting on the swing, head down, deep in thoughts, which makes you stop your steps.

you narrow your eyes to check the person out. you could see the man’s red hair which brings one very specific person in your mind. hoping it is who it is, you take your phone out and message the guy in your head as you take a few steps towards the playground.

you: am i seeing things or is that you?

coincidentally the guy seems to have a need to check his phone, and he quickly looks up. your face breaks into a smile as soon as you see the teal colored eyes looking at you.

“sae!” you say his name with excitement lacing your voice and run to him. as soon as you reach him, him now standing, you put your arms around him, “ah it’s so nice to see you.”

he puts his one arm around your waist and brings the other to stroke your hair, “we were together in the afternoon dummy.”

you look up at him with your arms still around him, “yeah but it’s nice to see you here, so randomly.” you place a kiss on his lip, “whatchu doing here at this hour?”

“i just couldn’t sleep so i got out for a breather. i could ask you the same though.”

you pull away from him and sit on the swing, him doing the same and sitting on the one besides yours, “i just submitted the assignment and i had to get a drink.” you offer him your drink and he accepts it. 

“you should rest though, don’t you have practice early in the morning tomorrow?” he sighs and closes his eyes after handing you your drink, “yeah, but i can’t stop thinking about stuffs for some reason.”

he lets his thoughts out and you both talk for quite a while after that. 

“why don’t you come over then?” he looks at you after your suggestion, "you said you were having trouble sleeping, we can go over to my place and i’ll make you tea which can help you relax. and we could spend more time together.”

he cracks a smile and nods, “yeah i’d very much like that.”

you get on your feet, “great then, come one my boy.” you hold out your hand for him which he takes and gets up from the swing. he intertwines your finger as you walk out the park after you throw the plastic cup in a near bin.

“ugh i feel tired.” you whine as you rest your head on him. “why did you even come out then, you should’ve just gone to bed you know.”

you look at him and scoff, “yeah and you still would have been in that park alone. be glad i came out.” he playfully rolls his eyes, “of course, i am oh so glad for that.”

“keep taking with that sarcastic tone and i will leave you to chill out here.”

“you love me too much to do that and you know it.” he looks at you with a smirk on his pretty face.

“you’re lucky you look good or i would have killed you by now.”

“you’re lucky i love you babe or who knows where i would have thrown your body.”

you gasp and hit on his arm, “sae! that is so mean of you.”

he chuckles, a smile on his face which instantly melts your heart. you are so glad he doesn’t show that pretty smile of his around other people or you’d have to poke so many eyes of other people to prevent them from seeing such a beautiful sight. 

“i’m kidding babe.” he cups one side and kisses your lips. you kiss him back almost immediately, grabbing on the collar of his sweatshirt to pull him closer to yourself. 

no matter how many times you get to taste him, you could never get enough of him. you place your one hand on the back of his neck and tilt your head, deepening the kiss.

you pull away, just enough to look at his face and smile seeing the soft expression on his face that only you could see.

“come on pretty boy, let’s go home.” he places another soft kiss on your lips and takes your hand on his, “let’s go, love.” 

[ellekhen]

Hand, Hearth, and Home

Chapter 56 - Of Waterdeep

Chapter Summary: On the eve of Halsin's attempt to save Thaniel, Church still finds himself disturbed by his own encroaching darkness. He seeks out a friend also haunted by a similar sort of imminent doom, and together they commiserate and contemplate their respective supposed fates.

Pairing(s): Astarion x Male Tav (Main); Past OC x Male Tav Rating: Explicit Length: 292K+ words; Chapters 56/?? (Master Post)

Excerpt below:

“Over here!” a voice calls softly.

Gale has seated himself upon the grass, a blanket spread neatly beneath him and what appears to be the remnants of ritual components. His hands conduct the illusion like an orchestra as they dance soundlessly overhead.

“I was looking for you,” Church mutters wryly, seating himself carefully upon the blanket. Gale’s face is notably serene, rather than the troubled expression that furrowed his brow days earlier. “You’ve been here the whole time?”

“Not quite,” Gale murmurs as he carefully arranges a constellation of stars above them. “I walked around a fair bit. Talked to some of our allies — Halsin, mainly. Took care of a few things. Prepared a few… missives,” he hesitates. “There was one thing left to do, and it was to apologize to you.”

Church huffs a laugh. “I’m not one for grand gestures, but this… this is a nice change,” he admits, scanning the sky. “As far as an apology goes… I’m not sure it’s merited. Not on your part, at any rate.”

Gale shakes his head, flicking away a few stars. “There I was, spouting on about some noble sacrifice I had to make, when I had been berating you for the very same thing.”

“It’s not the same,” Church admits. “You were tasked by a goddess to do something that will save the world. I’ve got a couple of mad fey luring me into another deal for my own selfish reasons.”

Gale frowns. “Wanting to continue one’s existence isn’t selfish.”

Church shoots him a wry glance. “That’s what I’ve been trying to say to you, isn’t it?”

Gale chuckles, casting his eyes back up. 

“So you’ve already spoken with Halsin, then?” Church inquires. “I was going to ask you to help. His diagrams were a bit confusing…”

“I have prepared the relevant components and charts for the Harpers,” Gale assures him absently. “It is too soon to prepare such rituals for them to remain potent for Halsin’s endeavor. We have… some time.”

“And you’ve made use of it,” Church follows his eyes back up to the starry sky. “I should’ve known this was your doing. It’s beautiful.”

“Indeed. The curse is still present of course — just veiled and at arm’s length for now. Not a trick I can repeat often, but tonight?” Gale’s voice falters. “Tonight is different.”

He exhales wistfully. “I love this time of night. There’s an almost reverent silence that accompanies the peak of darkness, when you’d almost believe the dawn will never break.” 

He gestures a hand grandly across the view. “The timelessness of lovers. The most beautiful of fantasies.”

Church eyes him with concern.

“You’re sounding particularly philosophical,” he remarks cautiously. “Are you alright?”

Gale huffs a cheerless laugh.

“I will be, soon,” he nods grimly to himself. “I am perhaps just one hard day away from being without any troubles at all. Any night might be my last alive. If it is this one, then… I wanted it to be under a canopy of beauty and wonder… and with company to match,” he adds with a smile, nudging Church playfully.

But his smile falters as the tiefling continues to scrutinize him. 

“I thought this place might bring me peace. I thought it might make the weight of what I must do feel a little lighter…” Gale looks down, face falling. “...but I am not so sure.”

Finally, Church lets out a harsh sigh. “Fuck it. You know I wasn’t going to drop it — is this truly what you want? To die for the promise of Mystra’s forgiveness?”

Gale smiles bitterly. “Babe or crone, coward or hero, death is assured. Mystra’s forgiveness is not. If you knew the end was near, would you not want to ensure it had meaning?”

He glances back up at him, troubled. “I am… terrified,” he admits. “I will not claim otherwise. My face could scarcely conceal it even if my words sought to deny it.” 

“This isn’t the end,” Church insists fervently. “Not yet. We still have some time. We still have questions that need answers. We…”

“Church… thank you. But even if we do find another way, perhaps this is the right way. The end fate wishes for me.” Gale nods to himself. “There is no point running from the inevitable. Better to meet it, on my own terms.”

“Nothing is inevitable,” Church retorts fiercely. “Not when we face it together. I don’t have to die. And you don’t have to die.”

“Yes,” Gale chuckles. “But there is so much to live for, and so few moments in which to house it all.”

Church takes his hand. “But there are moments,” he says fervently. 

Gale chuckles. “Believe me, one moment in your company has often been enough to prise the fear from my heart. And I…” he hesitates. “I have missed your company, my friend. These past couple days. And I’m so very glad you came here to share this with me.”

He gestures vaguely up at the sky. 

“I know that this is unreal, but I created it for you.” He looks shyly over at Church. “You must know that you’re… you’re very special to me.”

The wizard feels warm nestled against Church’s side, seated in this protected corner of the cursed land. Church’s heart throbs with fondness, but also some trepidation. Where is he going with this?

“The point is…” Gale looks up into the sky. “…time is short. Every day, every moment is uncertain.”

“I thought we’d have more time,” Church whispers in agreement. 

They sit in companionable silence for a long moment longer, watching the aurora the wizard had conjured ripple shimmer across the sky in wide, iridescent stripes. 

“I… want to show you something,” Gale says. “If this were to be the last night of my life, I think I’d like to share in the Weave with you. Take you somewhere that isn’t the Shadowlands.”

He smiles at the tiefling. “Any ideas for sunnier locales?”

Church thinks to himself for a long moment. And then he huffs a laugh. “At risk of you calling me uncreative… why not take us back to Waterdeep?” he suggests with a smile. “I never appreciated it enough when I was there. It was never a home for me… but I’d like to know what it was to you.”

Gale beams at him. “On the contrary, I think that would be rather apt.”

He reaches his hand forward — parting the Weave like a curtain to reveal a luminous scene before them. Eventually the light focuses to reveal a charmingly-cluttered room with accents of dark wood and heavy green curtains. The walls are full of books, and the edges of the rug-strewn ground are lined with piles of even more books. 

“This is the center of my universe,” he says, pushing himself up to stand. “The sculptures, the paintings, the walls enlivened by the spines of a thousand books..."

Church takes his hand as the wizard helps him to his feet, continuing to gesture around them grandly.

“...the grand piano plays the Lliirian Suites all by itself, and as we look out beyond the arches that lead to the terrace…” Gale beckons Church forth as the double doors open to a sunlit terrace, “…we see the weary sun take its daily dive into the sea.”

Church follows him out, shading his eyes from the golden glow. 

“That’s nice,” Church says, voice breaking as he takes in the warmth of the sunset. “It’s only been a couple weeks, hasn’t it? But it feels like we’ve spent months here in the Shadowlands already.”

He settles himself heavily down upon a wooden settee with red cushions, sighing. Gale smiles down at him. 

“My favorite spot,” he remarks idly. “Many times, evening turned to night and back to daybreak once more while I sat here, lost in words.”

“Sounds like you,” Church smiles back at him. “Up all night reading? I do love that rebellious streak of yours.”

“Oh, allow me to live dangerously while I still can,” Gale smirks.

The wizard settles beside him as Church gazes over the panorama of the terrace’s view. He inhales the sea air deeply. 

“I think you’re remembering the harbor on a good day,” he comments wryly. “It’s missing the fish and smoke.”

“A memory isn’t perfect by nature,” Gale murmurs. “But sometimes the imperfection is what makes a moment beautiful. It’s the essence of the memory that matters. It comforts us, it…”

He traces his finger along the arm of the settee as his voice catches. “It’s home. I…” 

Gale turns to look at Church with wet eyes. “This was… an excellent choice,” he says, straining to keep his voice steady. “If something were to happen, I should like to see home again. Even if it’s not real. Even if…”

Church pulls him into a hug, holding him close as the wizard struggles to stifle a sob.

“No, damn it, I refuse to be a blubbering mess,” Gale chuckles wetly, though he returns his friend’s embrace. “This isn’t quite what I imagined when I wove this for you.”

“What did you imagine?” Church grins as the wizard begins to pull away from him.

And then he realizes then that Gale’s shining eyes are soft and awed, as if he is the view, and not the harbor behind them.

“Gale…?” the tiefling whispers as the man leans back in towards him…

…Gale’s lips are tentative and admittedly a little clumsy as they press upon Church’s. The wizard’s stubble tingles where it brushes against his skin, his hand warm as it comes to rest against his cheek. The tiefling freezes there, scarcely able to comprehend the moment as it passes like one of the harbor’s ships in the wind. 

Still, Church kicks himself for how long it takes for him to get ahold of himself and push his friend gently away, an apology in his eyes. 

Gale draws back at once, lowering his hand hastily. 

“I’m…” the wizard looks flustered in his own fantasy, pulling away completely. 

Church smiles sadly at him. “Look, it’s alright. I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. That was impulsive of me. If things were different…” Gale swallows, looking down to the floor as he fidgets with his hands. “If we had both met back then in Waterdeep, I would have taken the time to do things properly. To say it all better.”

His mouth twists. “…perhaps be more charming. More forward.”

“Gale…” Church sighs. 

“I’m sorry,” Gale chuckles ruefully. “I didn’t intend to bring you here to subject you to my regrets, nor did I intend to make a complete ass of myself.”

“You’re not an ass,” Church protests easily.

Gale shrugs sheepishly. “I lived the life of a hermit for some time before I met you — these sort of rituals aren’t quite in my grimoire, to say the least.

“I know I missed my chance,” he admits with a sigh. “I thought, for a time, that what you had with our companion was merely a…” he blushes, “…physical… distraction. But I should have seen it plain upon your journal's pages as much as in your eyes.” 

He looks up at Church with a tight smile. “Your heart is with Astarion.”

Church has no desire to deny it. Not anymore. 

“It is,” he says softly, a smile tugging at his lips despite himself. 

Gale looks away from him. “He’s lucky to have you. It’s clear you have been helping him keep the metaphorical darkness at bay. I only hope he does the same for you.”

Church follows his gaze out into the harbor. “He makes me want to fight for the future,” he murmurs. “A future where he’s safe. A future full of sunnier days by his side, where he doesn’t need to be afraid.” He sighs. “Where neither of us have to be afraid.”

“A noble pursuit,” Gale says evenly, smiling stiffly past his quiet, embarrassed devastation. 

“Gale…” Church squeezes the man’s hand briefly. “I don’t think loving someone as a friend is worth less than being in love with someone. I don’t think I’ve had a friend like you in quite some time, and now that I have that… that’s also something worth fighting and living for. 

“And tonight’s not the last night,” he adds firmly. “You’ll live to come back to Waterdeep — for real. And I’ll…” He hesitates. “I want to visit you,” he says earnestly. “You’d be the closest thing I’d have to home there. So please… don’t write yourself off.

“I know it’s not what you hoped for, but this?” He holds up Gale’s hand and shakes it, squeezing tight as he smiles wanly at his friend. “I’d still fight for this. I’m not going to let my friend die if there’s another way.”

Gale huffs a laugh. “Do you… really think there is another way?”

“There has to be,” Church insists. “I’ve let the gods take a lot of things from me, but you’re someone I won’t let go so easily.”

“Nor are you,” Gale smiles softly at him. “Not if I have any say in the matter.”

He gazes out once more over the harbor of Waterdeep, sighing gently. “But I suppose we all must return to reality…”

He snaps his fingers, and in an instant they are back in the clearing, the aurora flowing serenely overhead.

“...one way or another,” Gale mutters wryly.

Church feels his heart sink a little, already missing the warmth of the sunset — illusion or not. Still, he nudges his friend. “It’s not so bad,” he murmurs. “After all, you’re still here.”

Gale huffs a tired laugh. “Damn you,” he says without much heat. His lips can’t seem to help but smile. “Damn you for giving me so much to care about. Our friends, our adventures… this would have been so much easier if it was just me. But it isn’t.”

His thumb brushes over Church’s hand again. 

“If there is a way — any way — to save all that’s grown dear to me… I want to seize it.” He then grimaces. “I just cannot fathom what that might be, other than to fail Mystra and condemn the world.”

“Let’s take it step by step,” Church tells him. “First, we save Thaniel and lift the Shadow Curse. Then, we take Ketheric’s artifact away from him and destroy it. After that, we attack Moonrise Towers, destroying Ketheric for good. And then…”

He hesitates.

“...then, we’ll have a better idea what the true heart of the Absolute is,” Gale finishes for him. “We can strategize again along the way. Adapt. And maybe by then we’ll have found something that isn’t… me.” He sighs. “I have to hope.”

Church squeezes his hand, smiling. “And I’ll hope with you.”

Gale leans against him, staring up at the stars.

“Stay with me, will you?” he asks shakily. “I… I don’t want to think of it anymore. But I don’t want to be alone either." 

“Of course,” Church murmurs, draping his cloak across his friend’s shoulders as well. “For as long as you need.”

Start from the beginning!

[electricgoldtendercare]

confession.

hi babes!! i’ve been working on this one for ages and finally finished it yesterday. it’s a joel miller au where he is a priest🧍🏼‍♀️😇. definitely sacrilegious so please avoid reading if that can be a trigger for you!! basically just filth! maybe a part 2 coming if anyone is interested? tia 💗

MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY

warnings: smut, pure filth, religious terms, reader afab, gendered terms, oral male receiving, slight voyeurism??, sex in a church, i’m so sorry, praying so hard after this one, age gap (24 & 56), more of my terrible endings, not super edited,

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Okay, you can do this. You’ve confessed so many times before. It’s simple. You tried to convince yourself as you walked up the steps to church. It shouldn’t be different, should be the way it usually was but something was different. That something being the new Priest, the man who prompted you to even need to confess in the first place. Father J, that’s what he liked the congregation to call him. Everyone immediately fell in love with him, all the women whispered that he was handsome and all the men wanted to invite him over to their barbecues. You hadn’t been immune to his charm either, that being what got you into this mess. 24 years old and marching up the church steps to confess to probably the most embarrassing thing you could think of. You should have dressed up a bit more, clad in your work uniform and messy hair tied up in a bun. Just tight jeans and a fitting t-shirt that proudly displayed the name of the restaurant you worked at across the chest. Church was meant to be judgment free but you knew if any of the old ladies in the congregation saw you walk in that way you’d be the talk of the week until another young woman did something that they deemed worse. Regardless, you walked to the front of the church and found the confessional with the door open, inviting you in to make a fool of yourself.

Stepping inside, you shut the door behind you and settle into your seat. scratching at the denim of your jeans to release some anxiety. “Good Afternoon and Bless you, my child.” You hear, his voice bringing you comfort along with more stress. “Hi…” You sigh, remembering your next words. “Bless me Father, for I have sinned.” You say quietly, looking towards the wall between you and seeing the outline of his head and broad shoulders. “Go ahead, confess your sins.” Going quiet to allow you to confess. You take a deep breath, preparing yourself before speaking up. “I don’t know..exactly how to say this. Ever since you came to our church, well, your church now, ever since then i’ve had these feelings. You obviously know, ok well maybe you don’t know, but you’re very handsome. All the women in the congregation talk about it like all of the time.” You laugh and you hear him chuckle quietly, you wouldn’t have been able to even hear him if you weren’t in such a confined place. “Anyways, i’m sorry. This is weird for me to admit..” You whisper. “Would it be easier if we were face to face?” He asks, “No! No, I'm sorry. No, sir. I think my face would be far too red telling you this to your face.” You admit, taking yet another deep breath before deciding to just come out and say it.

“I had a se-explicit dream about you and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since. I’m so sorry. I feel so so bad!” You say, bracing yourself for the man to raise his voice or leave the cupboard for you to sit in silence with your filthy thoughts. You notice the air around you change, becoming more heavy as the seconds tick by. Finally, after what feels like forever he speaks up. “I-There’s no need to apologize, this is why i’m here.” His voice is strained, an octave lower than normal but you were far too embarrassed to even notice. “Just this one dream?”

“Yes…well, no. Father, please forgive me. I keep having this same dream: I find myself daydreaming about it when I know I shouldn’t. I tried to tell my mom but she told me I should come share with you so…yeah.” The man next to you nods slowly, letting out a shaky breath as he attempts to compose himself. He knew it was you over there, he had seen you walk in and through the rows of benches closer to where he was.

“I see…Well, dreams of that variety are common. I have people coming in all the time to confess them. Do you remember what happened in this dream? and these daydreams..” He was toeing a very thin line, knowing that what he heard next might not be easy to sit still during. As much as he attempted to be immune to thoughts about sins of the flesh he was just a man, a man who had a beautiful young woman admitting something like this about him, to him. Your cheeks turn bright red, not having expected to be asked for specifics. You had been prepared to confess and then forget it ever happened, but here you were opening your mouth to explain the dream to your priest. Your sweet, kind, handsome priest…No! God Forgive me. You were just going to have to live in the confession box if your thoughts kept moving that way.

“Okay well..” Here goes nothing. How specific were you supposed to be?? “It starts the same every time..you ask me to stay after mass to help you with something. Once everyone is out of the building..i’m helping you put the hymn books back. Most of the time I feel you come up behind me while I'm putting them away…your hands touching my waist and I can feel your breath across my neck.” You reach up to rub the back of your neck instinctively, trying to ignore the steady heat that was beginning to burn in your belly. “After I would feel your breath I'd..I’d…it’d be your lips on my neck. Kissing and..and sucking.” You whisper, not daring to look over at him. “Go on..”

“Well you’d leave a lot of marks..all over my skin. I remember one you said that you wanted everyone in the congregation to know how much..how..oh i’m sorry, father but how slutty I was being for you..”

“Shh, it’s alright.” He whispers, voice deep with something you couldn’t put a finger on. It couldn’t have possibly been lust, could it? “Would it make you feel better if you came and sat with me while you told me more?” He asks and you think on it quickly before nodding. “Yes Father. That’d feel better.” You say and leave your side, walking around to the side of the confession box he was in and stepping inside. Bodies were close together, fingers brushing over each other as you found a place to stand. “Kneel, my child. Then continue on.” He orders, voice still soft and kind which makes it easier for you to follow his direction. You put your hands on his thighs to steady yourself as you knelt down in front of him, cheeks bright red at the compromising position. He nods his head to urge you to continue and you take a deep breath before you do. “This happened in the dream too…all over the church. You’d ask me to kneel and pray but it always ended up with…well, you know.”

“Use your words.” The voice came out gruff and more pointed than it had been, catching you off guard. “Oh, um. It always ended up with your co-with me on my knees giving you a blowjob.” You whispered the last word, even if the way he was staring at you made you want to admit every dirty thought you had ever had about him you still felt like you should have some shame.

“Are you thinking about it right now?” He asks, hands laying gently on yours where they held his knees. You stared at his hands, slowly letting your gaze wander up to his face where you found his pupils blown out and his lips parted ever so slightly. You weren’t sure where the situation was going, preparing yourself for anything as you slowly nod. “I am…I’m sorry.” You whisper and you hear him let out a shaky breath. One of his hands moves to push your hair out of your eyes, fighting himself in his mind over what to do next. He absolutely should kick you out, apologize for letting it get so far out of hand but he was frozen, unable to glance away from you. His fingers move down your jaw and you lean into his touch, feeling his thumb brush over the side of your mouth which causes your lips to part, head pathetically turning to find the finger to wrap your lips around it. Keeping your eyes on his, you start to suck on his thumb slowly and surely, letting all of the desire drip out of you and into the action. Your eyes found his once again as you used your tongue and lips around his finger, the digit becoming coated in saliva as you did so. He let his other hand move to the back of your head, a gentle touch turning into a grip on your hair to keep you in position as you worked his thumb. You felt so filthy, your knees aching from kneeling in the confession box as you hollowed out your cheeks. You felt the urge from your chest and down between your thighs to please the man in front of you in any way you could.

He pulls his thumb out of your mouth, a trail of spit connecting it to your lips and away as he did so. You lay your head on his thigh, staring up at him expectantly. You were pretty sure that you’d do absolutely anything he asked in that moment, mind clouded with lust and senses overwhelmed with the scent and feel of him. Gone were the worries of even having these feelings for your priest, all you wanted was to be a good girl for him and the feelings were stronger than ever. You open your mouth to ask him what he’d like from you next but the words died out when you both heard the door to the chapel swing open and shut. His eyes filled with panic as he glanced between you and where the footsteps were coming from. You squeeze his thigh to get his attention and mime a zipper closing your mouth before throwing out the key. It looked as though he was about to make you leave but the other side of the booth was filled before he was able to make the decision. “G-good afternoon, and bless you child.” He says, shaking his head at the way he was tripping on his words. You thought it was cute, the way he seemed so nervous from here, though you were sure whoever was in the booth next to you would never guess.

“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.” You hear, trying to decide the best way to make your next move. You slowly slid your hands up his thighs, dangerously close to where you could see a tent in his pants just waiting for you. You stifle a groan when you feel his hands grip your wrists tightly to attempt to stop you, sending you a warning glance as he listens to the member. You stop, but only for a moment before you let your fingers brush over his covered member. You went teasingly slow, partially to tease him but also so he wouldn’t trip on his words in the middle of his prayer. You were unsure where the newfound confidence was coming from, maybe the way he was reacting from your touch was encouraging you to keep this up, keep up the act of being over confident when in reality you were not. You make careful movements to undo the button of his pants, moving extra slow with the zipper so it wouldn't make any noise. Once it was down you were able to see the outline of his cock in his underwear, licking your lips subconsciously as you let your hand lay against it with the lightest touch. His hand was still on your wrist, gripping tightly but not moving you. You’d have a bruise in the morning and the thought brought you more excitement than anything else.

At a lull in the conversation you took a deep breath in preparation before sitting yourself up on your knees and leaning over to press a small, open mouthed kiss against the clothed outline. It felt warm against your lips and you had to suppress a giggle when you felt it twitch against your touch. You feel his stare watching your every move, like a lion about to attack it’s prey. You let your mouth wrap around the tip, using your tongue to slowly soak the fabric that proved as a barrier. You quickly look up through your lashes and notice it seems he has stopped breathing, bringing a smile to your face and causing pride to grow through your chest. You slide your mouth up and down his length, coating it in saliva and enjoying the way the outline becomes more prominent. You hear the boring lull of whoever was next to you drone on, a reminder that staying quiet was the safest thing to do. You pull back, watching him curiously as you slowly slide two fingers below his waistband and start to pull them down. You wait to make sure he won’t stop you, that he wants this as much as you do. He only nods as he keeps speaking and soon you have his boxers pulled down, letting his cock spring up before you.

So, you’d never actually seen one in person before and the way it stood proudly in front of you gave you pause, the newfound confidence you had was dissipating until you just felt nervous. Sensing a change in you, he raises an eyebrow as if to ask if you were still wanting to do this. You nod back almost too quickly, taking a deep breath before moving forward. You feel his hand on the back of your head and watch as his other wraps around the base of his cock, guiding it to your open mouth. You feel him rub the tip over your lips, biting down roughly on his own. You let him hit the tip on your tongue a bit, feeling as though you could moan simply at the taste of him. This was so much better than your dreams, the weight of his cock on your tongue and the way his hand gripped the back of your head harder each time was better than anything you could even imagine. “Suck” He mouths the word and you nod obediently, wrapping your lips around the swollen tip. You let your eyes flutter shut as you did so, reveling in the feeling before you felt a yank on your hair. Your eyes pop open quickly and looked at him with concern, had you hurt him? had you been caught? You watch as he points to his eyes and then to yours and you nod in understanding. Maintaining eye contact, you wrap your lips around the tip again and take it fully into. your mouth, using your tongue to lick the leaking slit like you’d seen in films you certainly shouldn’t have watched. You watched as his lips moved but you were too focused on the way your own stretched around him to hear any of the words he was saying. You felt his hand that was on the back of your head pushing against it, taking more of him into your mouth. You could only hope that what you were doing was good, that you were pleasing him in a way he deserved. You wished you could hear the way you were making him feel but you had to rely on the way his hand gripped the back of your head and the look in his eyes. You vaguely can hear the confessional door shut and footsteps walking away from the two of you. You pulled up, staring up at him expectantly.

“You’re doing so well, how about you keep going?” He asks when the door to the church shuts and you nod eagerly, fueled by the praise he had given you. You take his cock back into your mouth and finally you hear a deep grunt fall from his lips and land right between your thighs. You test out a small moan, letting your lips vibrate against him which brought out another moan from the man above you. You were sure you could die and go to Heaven…well if you weren’t already fairly sure sucking off your Priest in the confession box took away your invitation there. Though his moans may be the most heavenly sound to grace your ears and you wanted to be the one to elicit such sounds from him forever. Soon the booth was full of the noise of your mouth working his cock, having ventured down further to take as much of him as you could, his hand helping you stroke the rest of his length as you did so. “Such a good girl.” He would mutter, the hand not gripping your hair brushing across your forehead and down your cheek, admiring the way they hollowed to take him in. You felt his hips stutter against your hands and glance up at him with a questioning gaze. He nods in response, looking like he was about to ask you a question but stopped himself. You pull off slowly, keeping your lips close enough to brush against the tip as you speak. “You can come in my mouth..” You whisper before wrapping your lip back around him once more. That seemed to elicit the response you wanted from him as you hear his moans speed up and his hand grip your head the hardest he had yet. You pause your movements just long enough to let him maneuver his hips up to thrust into your mouth, once, twice, three times and he was letting out a string of whimpers as your mouth filled with his cum, struggling to keep it all in.

Once he was seemingly done, you take your time licking up his length to clean him up, planting a soft kiss on the head before sitting back on your knees and wiping your mouth with a thumb. You look up at him with a proud but shy smile, watching as he tucks himself back into his pants and lean back against the wall. There was evident struggle behind his eyes, one you could tell was from fighting himself over what had just happened and if he was strong enough to stop it. He reaches forward to pull you up, helping you sit on his lap and face him. He pushes some of your hair back out of your eyes when his own land on your now extra plump lips. After what felt like a minute, he was pulling you close to press your lips together. Your heart raced even more than it had being on your knees for him and you let your hands lay on his chest as the kiss deepened. You took note to remember how his facial hair felt against your skin, the pattern of his now calmed breathing, even the way the fingers on his left hand fidgeted as you kissed. Your skin burned where he held you and you were sure you could stay there forever. Unfortunately for both of you, you needed some air. No words were shared as you both caught your breath, chests rising and falling in time with each other. Suddenly there was a loud ringing and you realized it was your phone, your mom calling you specifically. You compose yourself before answering, letting her know you’d be home for dinner soon but leaving out the specifics of where you had been. You knew she wouldn’t be upset that you went to confess but you were sure if she asked you about it later you’d have no way to hide the flush on your cheeks as you reminisced.

“I better go..” You speak, staring at your priest with a small pout on your face. His thumb finds your bottom lip, rubbing softly to rid you of the sour expression you held. “Go see your family, it’s important.” He says and you nod, opening the door before stepping out into the empty church with him behind you. You saunter towards the front doors before turning on your heel to face him, twiddling your thumbs a bit “Thank you, Father.” You says sweetly, leaning up and kissing his cheek before quickly turning to leave the building. He watches you as you make your way towards your car, shaking his head a bit. He signs the cross as he walks inside, heading straight to his prayer cabinet to repent for his sins and the ones he was already thinking about committing with you.

[iamnotthere-idonotdie]

dream of me

part three

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synopsis: reader has been moved away for a few months and wishes they’d stayed in gotham. but a trip to metropolis may provide the opportunity they need to try to reconcile with bruce.

content: bruce wayne x reader, implied depression, some cursing, no smut

a/n: this one took a bit longer to get written down because i kept getting stuck, but im glad i was able to finish it. i still have more parts in mind that i want to include in this series but i don’t know how fast i’ll be able to get them all done. also thanks for the likes on the last two parts!

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“are we still on for dinner tonight?”

your boyfriend is on the other line.

“yeah sure. my place or yours?” you ask.

“how about we go out? there’s this japanese restaurant i’ve heard is good. we could try that.”

“okay. 7 o’clock sound good?”

“sounds great. i’ll pick you up?”

“sure.”

“okay, babe. see you then.” your phone beeps after he hangs up. the screen goes back to your favorites list in your contacts. bruce is still on it. you haven’t had the will to delete it.

it’s been three months now since you left. you didn’t think you’d move on this quickly but robert has proved to be a good companion for you. or at least some kind of distraction. you sit there at your desk, just staring at bruce’s contact. you know you shouldn’t make personal calls on company time but you needed to hear a familiar voice. today has been difficult. some days are better than others. some days you feel fine, happy, content with your job and with robert. other days, like today, it’s like a rain cloud is looking over you and at any moment the monsoon will come. you glance at the top of your screen and the clock says 4:56. you suppose you can leave a few minutes early. you grab your bag and leave your desk, heading toward the elevators. your mind sends you a flashback to that first elevator ride with bruce. sometimes you wish you could just forget about it. all of it. press a button and make the hurt all go away. the memories. the reminders that drip with pain and longing, filling your mind to the brim with tidal waves of regret.

you regret so much. you regret not telling bruce how you felt. you regret not insisting that you stay, whether he wanted to be with you or not. you regret leaving. you thought being away from him would allow yourself to heal but it’s just made every little detail of life remind you of how it all went wrong.

you often find yourself still checking gotham news sites. almost every article is a new story about how well he’s doing. how the company is thriving, how he’s creating new outreach programs and divisions to help the city. he even started a new program, like the one you worked with him on, this time supporting students interested in fine arts. photograph after photograph shows him in different gotham schools, giving out new supplies and resources. he’s doing amazing work there. and you’re still here, coming in every day to sit at a desk and make spreadsheets. the job offer turned out to be too good to be true. you were promised travel, but the furthest you’ve gone is phoenix. and it wasn’t even for work. you finally step off the elevator and into the garage where you see your car where you left it. at least you got that assigned spot.

back at your apartment, you drop your bag on the kitchen table and flip through your daily supply of junk mail. you go into your bedroom and open the curtains to let the remaining rays of sun come through. you look out over the city. you can admit it’s a beautiful view.

you sit in your armchair and stare out the window until robert texts you that he’s downstairs. you get another notification on your phone at the same time, from the gotham gazette. the headline stops you in your tracks toward the door.

“bruce wayne and mystery woman seen leaving local restaurant”

you feel a gasp get caught in your throat and your chest tightens. you can’t be mad that he’s moved on when you have too, but the pain still comes. you click on the link to the article. paparazzi pictures of him with his arm around her shoulders threaten to bring tears to your eyes. the restaurant sign behind them glows and you realize it’s the one you suggested you’d go to with him. the one you almost suggested you’d go to. you never got the chance, because he instead had his own suggestion in mind.

you close the app and sit down at the kitchen table, putting your head in your hands. it’s all starting to rush back again. that pain. that intense, overwhelming pain that takes your breath away.

your phone dings again with a text from robert, telling you to hurry up or you’ll miss your reservation. robert. not even him can make you catch your breath.

you grab your bag and head out anyway, not wanting to stand him up. you get to his car and open the door. bruce would’ve come up to your apartment and walked you down. he would’ve opened the door for you.

“hi babe,” robert says cheerfully as he leans in to kiss you. you turn your head so he just catches your cheek.

“long day?” he asks, sensing your mood.

“yeah. long day.” you say flatly.

robert tries to the fill the car ride with small talk. you can only muster the occasional one or two word response every few minutes. you get to the restaurant and robert leads you inside.

“reservation for robert?” he asks the host.

“right this way.” you get to your table and sit across from robert and open up your menu.

“i’ve heard the steak here is really good.” he says as he flips through his menu.

“hm.”

“or i’ve read that their salads are good too...”

“mm hm.”

“do you want to get a bottle of wine?”

“sure.”

“maybe an appetizer?”

“okay.”

“…these dumplings look good.”

“yeah.” you feel irritation rising.

“or the edamame—”

“jesus rob just fucking pick something.”

he closes his menu fast and all but slams it on the table.

“what the hell is your problem?” his voice rises and you feel people starting to look in your direction.

“keep your voice down.” you set your menu down too.

“no, i’m tired of this. what is going on? why are you being such an ass?”

“i’m not being an ass, you’re being annoying.”

“i’m trying to talk to you.”

“then talk to me.”

“i try but you won’t so much as look at me let alone actually engage in conversation.” he looks at you with hurt in his eyes.

“what’s going on? you’ve been acting so weird lately and it’s been freaking me out.”

“i’ve been acting how i always do.”

“no, you’re not. over the past few weeks you’ve been getting more and more distant. you never actually talk to me about what’s going on with you and you’re always angry or upset or…” he lets out a disgruntled sigh.

“i’m just worried about you.” he says quietly.

“it’s just been stressful at work. that’s all.”

“no, i know that’s not it. look, i understand that you left a lot back in gotham, including your ex.”

you look down at your lap and your cheeks get hot with anger.

“but it’s not fair to punish me for the decisions you made.”

with that you grab your bag and stand up from the table and leave the restaurant. you wave down a cab and open the door, but robert comes up behind you and closes it.

“you can’t just run away. we need to talk about this.”

“talk about what exactly, robert? the fact that i’m miserable here? the fact that not a single moment goes by without regretting leaving? the fact that i can’t sleep at night because all i can think about is him? i can’t do this! i’m stuck! i’m stuck in a city that i hate because it’s not home. i’m stuck at a job that promised me the world and i all i get is a shitty desk and a worthless title. i’m stuck in a pointless relationship with someone i know i’ll never love. i’m done, robert. i’m just… done.”

you open the car door again and get inside. you look out the window and see a tear roll down robert’s cheek. that’s all you know how to do now. spread the pain around onto other people and watch the tidal wave crash into them too.

you lie in bed that night and just let the tears flow. you pick up your phone and delete robert from your favorites list. bruce wayne still sitting there, waiting. you click on his contact and remove it too.

your eyes are puffy that next morning from crying yourself to sleep. you park your car in your spot and head inside. you sit at your desk and try to wake yourself up with a cup of coffee. you just try to get through today. one thing at a time.

after a few minutes jonathan locke walks up to you and hands you a folder.

“we have a lead for a project in metropolis i’d like you to take a look at. if all goes to plan, you can go next week and present it.”

you take the folder and open it. it’s for a renewal project that will target the growing unhoused population.

“metropolis?”

“yes. it’s far but i think you can handle it.” he says with a smile.

you can’t help but feel like he’s patronizing you. you look back down again at the folder. it’s either your desk or metropolis.

“okay.” you just say quietly.

“oh, well great. that was quick. i’ll get you set up with tim who’ll be spearheading the trip and you guys can coordinate on responsibilities.”

“okay, thanks.”

“and it’s close by gotham so you could visit your old stomping grounds too.”

jonathan walks away from your desk and to his office. you think back to that night you met him, when he gave you a folder similar to this with an almost-irresistible offer. you thought you’d be leading the division. turns out the proposal said you could be leading the division. you should’ve read the fine print.

you and tim meet up that afternoon to discuss the trip. you like tim. he’s nice, respectful, and understands you want to be doing more so he delegates a lot of his responsibilities to you. or maybe he just wants a free trip to metropolis so he’s dumping the work on you, hoping you’ll appreciate it. no matter his true intentions, you do enjoy the extra work. it helps distract you.

“oh, also,” tim stops you as you start to leave his office after your discussion.

“jonathan wanted me to let you know that we can bring a plus one on the trip, on the company’s expense. my husband is gonna fly in after the meeting, you should bring your boyfriend.”

“oh… i think i’m actually gonna be flying solo, tim.”

“oh, is everything okay with you guys? i’ve only met the guy once but he seemed pretty great.”

“um, not really... we ended things last night.”

“last night? i wouldn’t have come into work today, honestly.”

“yeah, it was pretty rough.”

“well, for the record, i lied. he kind of seemed like an ass.”

you laugh. “he isn’t so bad. we just weren’t right for each other.”

“well i can attest to that. before chris i was with this guy who i just knew wasn’t the one for me. it took meeting chris to see that though. i realized that i never saw a future with the other guy. but with chris, he’s the one i always want to be around. when we’re apart it’s like… i don’t know like—“

“like you can’t breathe. like all the air in the room has been sucked out.”

“exactly… you sound like you speak from experience.”

you just look down at the floor.

“well whoever they are, if you get the chance again, don’t let them go this time.”

you look up and smile at him.

“thanks tim, but i’m pretty sure he’s long gone. and he’s with someone else now too.”

“if he’s really the one you want to be with, the one you really see a future with, don’t let anything stand in your way. fight for it.”

you pause for a second and think about tim’s advice. you want to fight for him, you do. but what if he doesn’t want you to?

“all i’m saying, is if you’re able to see him, it’s worth it to at least try again. then you’ll at least have an answer.”

“…you’re right. the uncertainty, i just know it’ll eat away at me forever.”

“right. so where is this guy? is he here in san fran?”

“no, he’s actually back in gotham.”

“well perfect! you can take a visit while we’re in metropolis.”

“i guess i could…”

“you should. you will. do it.”

tim starts to stand up to head home for the day.

“and you’ll tell me everything when you do.” you chuckle.

“you got it, tim.”

“i’ll see you tomorrow.”

“yeah, see you.”

you go sit back at your desk long after hours and think about this new plan. how are you even going to go about this? do you just show up at his home, knock on the door, and hope he answers? if he does, what do you even say?

you spend the next few days leading up to the trip trying to configure your plan for talking to bruce again. you’re more nervous about that than the actual work you’ll be doing.

you and tim sit next to each other on the flight to metropolis. you work on your computer trying to distract yourself from how nervous you are about possibly seeing him again. curiosity gets the better of you, and you search online to see where he’ll be.

“glad to see you’re using the in-flight wifi responsibly.” tim says sarcastically.

“i just…”

“if you’d have told me bruce wayne was the ex you were going to see in gotham than i might’ve given you some different advice.”

“and what would that advice be?”

“that, for one, you were stupid to let him go at all. and second, that you should go visit him on that school trip he’s doing. for that new fine arts project.”

“why there?”

“well you weren’t gonna just show up to his house and ring the doorbell, were you?”

you pause for a second and let your silence be your answer.

“okay yeah, not a good idea. trust me. rom coms do not portray that as accurately as you’d think.”

you chuckle.

“so you think i should show up at his event?” you ask.

“i think so. make it like you’re there for work. use that as an icebreaker, then you can get to talking.”

“that’s not a bad idea tim.”

“it’s a great idea. it’s right after our meeting tomorrow anyway. it’ll be perfect.”

“i’m not sure about perfect. what if he—“

“don’t torture yourself over the what-ifs. they’ll just burden you. and while i know i’ve been talking quite positively about this whole grand romantic gesture of yours… don’t get your hopes up either.”

you look over at him with furrowed brows.

“i heard someone say once that expectations are just premeditated disappointments. just… don’t set yourself up to get hurt.” he says quietly.

“well now i’m a little confused, tim. because you’re the one who’s been urging me to do this in the first place. and now you’re telling me not to get my hopes up?”

“you’re right. i’m sorry. just… tell him what you need to say. not what you think he wants or needs to hear. not what you think you should say. not what someone else would say. you have things you need to get off your chest, whatever they may be. and you need to speak them out, otherwise they’ll suffocate you.”

you get quiet again and realize he’s right. you’ve been so hung up on what you should do or say and didn’t stop to think about what you actually want to tell him.

“you’re right.” you say, barely above a whisper.

“i know i’m right.”

you smile and grab tim’s hand.

“thanks, tim. you’ve been one of my few friends since i moved here.”

“what can i say? i’m a peach.” he says with a smile and you laugh.

“can i just ask one thing?” he says softly. “…stay in touch?”

you just look at him, his face plastered with a sadness you’ve never seen from him before.

“if all goes well with… bruce wayne—god that’s still so weird to think about. but anyway, if you two get back together, and you move back home to gotham, and you two live happily ever after…” you laugh lightly.

“promise to stay in touch?”

“…of course, tim.” you smile at him. he squeezes your hand and smiles back, then he lets go and goes back to his in-flight crossword puzzle. you look back down at your computer and find the article detailing bruce’s trip to a gotham middle school where he’ll be implanting new support and funding to its, and every other gotham school’s, fine arts program. you sigh and close your laptop.

you spend the rest of the flight with your headphones in, listening to music and staring out the window. you know it’s a cliche, but you don’t care. this plan of yours and tim’s hangs over your head, that cloud ready to pour at any moment. you suppose the floodgates will open if things don’t go well tomorrow. the rain will come and the tidal wave will crash and you’ll be left to pick up the soaked pieces of your shattered heart once again. as though fate herself has heard your dark thoughts, the plane goes through a rain cloud and wet droplets scatter over the window, blurring your vision, each one shaking in the wind as if laughing at your melancholy. you just turn your music up and close your eyes, hoping sleep will find you before you land in metropolis.

of course, the sweet release of slumber doesn’t come and the plane jolts as it touches down. tim helps you carry your bags out of the overhead bins and out of the gate, and the two of you find a cab to your hotel. you discuss your meeting and go over your key points as you ride through downtown. when you get to the hotel and up to your room, you realize the time difference is working against you. the sky outside is dark and the stars are beginning to shine through the city lights, but your body is adjusted to the pacific time zone now. it’s not until almost three hours later that you are finally able to find rest. all the while thinking not about the meeting tomorrow, but of bruce. and what you want to say to him. you trust the words will come when they need to, and you close your eyes.

the next morning, you meet tim in the lobby of the hotel and you take a cab to your destination. your mind is preoccupied, and it shows during the meeting. you stumble over your words and forget your lines. you hope this doesn’t backfire on tim as he steps in and leads the pitch with confidence. his quick thinking proves successful, as you’re met with approving smiles and impressed nods from the room. you’re just glad tim was able to do well. to be truthful, you don’t care very much about your job security today. in the lobby, tim calls a ride for himself back to the hotel, and one for you to the train station.

“are you sure about this, tim? you don’t think it’s a mistake?”

“don’t tell me you’re having second thoughts now.”

“well, i just…”

“look,” tim puts his hand on your shoulder.

“i told you, just say what you need to say. everything will fall into place as they should. you’re doing the right thing.”

you let out a nervous sigh and look down again with tears in your eyes.

“what are you so afraid of? that he’ll say no?”

“no… i’m afraid he’ll say yes.” you say quietly, fighting back the tears.

“if things go well, if we get back together… who’s to say it won’t go wrong again? i don’t think i could handle going through that grief again.”

“just remember what i said before. once you’ve got it, don’t let it go. no matter what. fight for it. for him.” tim is getting choked up now too. he pulls you in for a hug and you will yourself not to cry on his pressed suit.

“now go. your ride’s here.” tim smiles at you as he opens the door to his separate taxi.

“good luck.”

“thank you tim.” you smile back and he closes the door. the car drives off and you’re standing there, giving yourself one last chance to back out before making your way to gotham. you open the door and get inside.

your heart is racing the entire ride to the train station. you feel yourself switch to autopilot as you purchase your ticket and get on the train car, choosing a window seat. you sit there like on the plane, your headphones in and your mind full. as you get closer to gotham, you see the blue sky and white fluffy clouds fade to the familiarity of the dark grey and rainy empyrean. after being away for so long… you find this gloomy atmosphere quite beautiful.

the train takes you to the heart of the city, where you take yet another taxi to the school. these different modes of transportation you’ve taken these last few days have at least been offering you some time to think. though those thoughts have not been the most pleasant, you still appreciate the solace the rides bring.

the car stops right in front of the school.

this is it.

you step outside, the rain being uncooperative with your entrance into the building. you inform the woman at the front desk you’re here for the outreach event and present your work id. she directs you to the gymnasium down the corridor. you walk quickly, nearly jogging to the gym. when you enter the room, you’re met with a large crowd of school staff members, students, members of the press… and there’s bruce, handing a violin to a child who’s face beams. bruce is smiling too, and he says something to the student before they walk back to their group of friends. the kids compare their gifts excitedly and you smile at their childlike enthusiasm and appreciation. when you look away and back towards bruce, you see that he’s looking right at you. you lock eyes and he begins making his way toward you. you try to gauge his facial expression, is it sadness? disdain? confusion, happiness? the closer he gets, the harder his face becomes to read. he weaves through the crowd, avoiding cameras flashing in his eyes and reporters sticking microphones up to his lips. finally, he’s standing right in front of you. and he smiles.

“you’re… here… what are you…”

“i had a meeting in metropolis this morning and i decided to take the trip here, to see gotham again.”

“and you just so happened to stumble in here?”

the press seems to have gotten bored of your conversation, because now you’re alone with bruce in the back of the gym.

“well i wanted to see… what this new project was. it’s amazing. these kids… you’re changing lives here, bruce.”

those feelings start to flood back. those feelings you got the last time you were in a setting similar to this one, when you saw how great bruce is with the kids, how much he cares about them. your heart somehow starts beating even quicker.

“it’s all because of you. if you hadn’t given that first pitch… none of this would be happening.” he replies.

you smile and look down.

you and bruce continue talking there, in the back of the gymnasium. you talk about your job, about san francisco, about how your life was going. you decide not to be entirely truthful for this reunion, not wanting to put a damper on the more than nice conversation. bruce tells you how he’s been too, how he’s been busy with new project after new project, how well the company is doing. how well he’s been doing. he seems happy. a part of you almost wishes he seemed a little sad that you’re there. that he’d be brimming with regret for letting you go. you start to feel guilty over your selfishness.

“well, i’m glad to hear that you’ve been doing well, bruce.”

“i’m glad you’re doing well too.”

“and you’re… happy? with everything? i mean with your um new—“

as if he read your mind, he stops you from finishing your sentence.

“i was hoping you wouldn’t see that. that was just a… a one time thing. i met her at a gala and we went out for dinner but i haven’t seen or even talked to her since. i just didn’t… feel right about it.”

you feel a sense of relief flood over you.

“and you? you’re not… seeing…” he starts.

“oh no, i mean, not anymore.”

“oh… okay.”

you just smile at each other for a second, then he suddenly takes your hand.

“come on. we’ve got a lot more to hand out… and i could use the help.”

you know he has a large group of team members standing by, waiting to help in the continuation of the gift giving, so you’re surprised at his request for you to help too. the two of you resume handing out the items. more instruments, paint sets, books, and more. it’s like christmas has come early, with every child getting something they’ve always wanted. you’re smiling more than you have in weeks, months. bruce is elated too, as he and the other team members provide these resources to this school. this specific event was to promote this program, but every gotham school will get this opportunity for new items as well. finally, the school day ends, the press leaves, and you’re standing the middle of the gymnasium. it’s quiet now with just a few more people here packing things up. you take this opportunity of peace to catch your breath and prepare yourself for what’s to come. bruce starts making his way toward you again and clench your hands into fists repeatedly.

“bruce, i have something i—“

“would you like to have dinner with me tonight?” he cuts you off.

“sorry, were you going to say something?” he asks.

“no, i… i was actually going to ask you the same thing.”

“great. we can head out now. alfred’s already started cooking.” bruce smiles at you and he leads you out of the school and to his car.

you make small talk as he drives you to his home. you forgot how grand it is as you step inside, alfred greeting you with a smile.

“it is so wonderful to see you again.”

“thank you alfred.”

“dinner will be ready in just a few minutes.”

alfred goes back to the kitchen to finish up.

“fire?” bruce says, starting to make his way toward the living room fireplace you’re all too familiar with.

“yes, that sounds nice.”

he lights the logs and sits down on the sofa next to you.

“i’m glad you agreed to come tonight. i was hoping we’d get a chance to talk.”

“me too.” you smile lightly.

“the truth is… i—“

the light clanking of dishes distracts you and bruce from your conversation as alfred begins setting the dinnerware on the table.

you and bruce stand and thank alfred for the meal. you eat in mostly silence, the occasional compliment of the food filling the quiet void. bruce takes your dishes to the kitchen and cleans them once again and you go sit back down on the sofa, the orange and yellow light of the flame illuminating your troubled mind. you need to get this off your chest.

bruce comes back and sits down.

“bruce, there are some things i need to say to you…”

you grab his hands in yours and look down.

“i haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since i left. i haven’t slept, i haven’t been happy. i… even tried seeing someone else. work didn’t help, i hated being so far from home… and i hated being so far from you.”

you finally look up at him.

“i love you, bruce. i’m in love with you. i have regretted every single day not telling you before. i hate that i didn’t show you how much you meant to me. and i hate that i left just because i was scared of what you’d say back.”

you choke back tears and look down again.

“you’re the moonlight that breaks through the clouds at night and into my bedroom window. you’re the soft fall of snowflakes that land on my eyelashes. you’re the rain that makes my hair wet and reminds me i’m still human. you’re everything to me, bruce. you are everything.”

you look back up at him and see tears in his eyes. he puts his hand gently on your cheek and kisses you. it’s slow, it’s gentle, it’s tender. it’s love.

he pulls away and chuckles softly.

“i have loved you since i met you. i’m everything to you? without you, i’d fade to nothing but a pile of ash. you being gone, tore me apart more than anything ever has before. even alfred can attest to that.”

you chuckle lightly and he laughs too.

“if i’m everything to you, then you’re more than everything to me.” he pulls you in again for another kiss.

“if i’m the moon then you’re the stars.”

he kisses your right cheek.

“if i’m the snow then you’re the fire.”

he kisses your other cheek.

“if i’m the rain then you’re the sun.”

he kisses your forehead.

“you’re my entire life.”

he kisses your lips.

you sigh as he runs his hands down your back and onto your hips. he picks you up and wraps your legs around his waist and stands up. you continue kissing as he takes you upstairs and to his bed. you run your hand through his hair, down his neck, over his arms. you want him, all of him. and he wants you.

suddenly the tidal wave secedes. the rains don’t come. the dark grey cumulus fades away. and now your mind is only occupied with bruce.

you thought once before that nothing beautiful lasts long in gotham city. but you were wrong. one thing has lasted. and it’s him.

…………………………………………………………………………………….

…………………………………………………………………………………….

[sacredbeauty]

be nosy

1: The last person you kissed screams they love you, you say…

2: Did you get to sleep in today?

3: You never know what you got until you lose it?

4: Do you have siblings?

5: How many kids do you want?

6: Who was the last person you held hands with?

7: Did you stand on your tippy-toes for your last kiss?

8: Do you think if you died, the last person you kissed would care?

9: Last person to talk on the phone?

10: Did anyone watch you the last time you kissed someone?

11: When’s your birthday?

12: Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?

13: What kind of phone do you have?

14: Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?

15: Are you a different person now than you were 5 years ago?

16: What were you doing at 4 am?

17: Would you rather write a paper or give a speech?

18: Are you lying to yourself about something?

19: Last night you felt…?

20: What’s something you cannot wait for?

21: Ever told your parents you were going somewhere but when somewhere different?

22: How many hours of sleep did you get last night?

23: Are you a morning or night person?

24: What did you get your last bruise from?

25: Do you reply to all of your texts?

26: Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for. What do you do?

27: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?

28: Anyone you would like to get things straight with?

29: How many months until your birthday?

30: Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?

31: Did you like this past summer?

32: What were you doing before you got on the computer?

33: Your ex is sitting next to you, with their new partner. What do you do?

34: What is the last thing you said out loud?

35: Your mood summed into one work?

36: Are you doing anything else besides taking this survey?

37: What are your initials?

38: Are you a happy person?

39: Do you still talk to the person you liked 4 months ago?

40: Where do you want to live when your older?

41: Have you had your birthday this year?

42: What did you do yesterday?

43: What will you be doing tomorrow?

44: How late did you stay up last night?

45: Is there anyone you would do anything for?

46: Is it hard to make you laugh?

47: Do you believe ex’s can be just friends?

48: Do you think any of your exes will eventually want to be with you again?

49: How many people have you had feelings for in the year of 2012?

50: Do you wish your ex was dead?

51: Have you ever dyed your hair?

52: Would ever take back someone that cheated?

53: Was New Year’s Even enjoyable?

54: Bet you’re missing someone right now?

55: How would your parents react if you got a tattoo?

56: Sleep on your back or stomach?

57: If you could move away, no questions asked, where would it be ?

58: What would you change about your life right now?

59: Has anything upset you in the past week?

60: Are you on the phone?

61: Today, would you rather go forward a week or back?

62: Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car?

63: Have you ever talked to someone when they were high?

64: Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?

65: Have you ever copied someone else's homework?

66: Are you the type of person who likes to be out or at home?

67: Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up?

68: Have you ever stayed up all night on the phone?

69: Could you use some sleep right now?

70: Are you going to have a baby by the time you’re 18?

71: Does it bother you when someone hides things from you?

72: What’s your favorite color?

73: Have you ever slept in the same room with someone you liked?

74: Have you ever been looking for something and it was already in your hand?

75: Do you get annoyed easily?

76: If someone liked you, would you want them to tell you?

77: Do you have a person of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?

78: Does anyone call you babe?

79: How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?

80: What do you prefer, relationship or one night stand?

81: What color hoodie did you wear last?

82: Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around anymore?

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 07/09/2024 (Nothin')

Sabrina Carpenter takes the entire top three for a second week - “Taste” at #1 (also its second week there) with “Please Please Please” at #2 and “Espresso” at #3. And whilst we’re here, the rest of the UK Singles Chart’s top five consists of Chappell Roan’s “Good Luck, Babe!” at #4, “BIRDS OF A FEATHER” by Billie Eilish at #5, and this episode at… 8:15. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, we start the episode with the notable dropouts, those being songs exiting the UK Top 75, which is what I cover, after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. This week, we bid adieu to “Did it First” by Ice Spice and Central Cee, and yes, that’s it. This was not a particularly exciting week and the rest of the dropouts simply weren’t notable, much was just Fontaines D.C. naturally slipping away after the first week. In fact, realistically, you can skip this week. We’ve got two debuts in the lower reaches and a whole bunch of gains that mostly just feel expected or temporary given how slow this week was in particular. There’s not much in the way of a surge or fascinating trend here, just kind of a stall-out, which is natural for a chart but does not leave me with much to say, hence the stalling.

We see returns for “These Words” by Badger and Natasha Bedingfield at #75 and “You’re Gonna Go Far” by Noah Kahan at #60, but most of the stories, if you can call them that, are deep into our notable gains, with boosts for “Belong Together” by Mark Ambor at #64, “The Man Who Can’t be Moved” by The Script at #62 and God, you know it’s a slow week when “Mr. Brightside” is up six spots to #59. After that, we see rises for “You & Me” by Disclosure featuring Eliza Doolittle at #56, “Black Friday (pretty like the sun)” by Tom Odell and Lost Frequencies at #55 - can’t be mad at those - then “Close to You” by Gracie Abrams at #53, “Diet Pepsi” by Addison Rae at #50, probably the most notable gain here for a pretty mediocre song, then “Pretty Slowly” by Benson Boone at #43, “WE PRAY” by Coldplay and co. at #31, unfortunately, “I Love You, I’m Sorry” by Gracie Abrams at #25, “Sailor Song” by Gigi Perez at #24, “Slow it Down” by Benson Boone at #19 and some residual hype for the Oasis comeback really seeping into the highest reaches of the chart: “Wonderwall” at #11, “Don’t Look Back in Anger” at #9 and “Live Forever” at a brand new peak of #8. Now to look at the two songs debuting in the top 75 right near the bottom and see if I’ll look back in anger at these flops or that these iconic smashes will live forever. I… don’t think I can pull that one off.

New Entries

#73 - “Indestructible” - Andy C and Becky Hill

Produced by Andy C

Part of me is somewhat excited for a song like this - a lesser-known producer, so one less likely to be coasting on name recognition, teams up with a recently inspired Becky Hill, whose last album was great, for a single with a cover art that looks straight out of 2014. Surely, this will be alright, and it very much is in the vein of what I expected, though with a sense of epic bombast that the charts do sometimes miss… and contrasts heavily with our other debut. The layered buzz of synths behind Becky are peppered with smaller synth plucks that are really cute to notice, and eventually transform into a pulsing build-up that, whilst sometimes clunky with its percussion, locks in well enough for a distorted, warping bass in the expected drum and bass drop alongside some really detailed synthwork in that moment that really fills the mix in what is basically just a dancefloor smash with little error. It’s not going for anything too drastic, in fact, the sound is reminiscent of exactly what I expected going in, but it dedicates itself to that sound in a way that is far from cheap and ends up being just as immersive as the best tracks from Becky’s last record. I could even see it slotting in and not doing too much damage to the tracklist cohesion. As far as if it will be a success, who knows? I do want to say it has some promise on sheer quality alone, but we’ll see.

#72 - “TOO COOL TO BE CARELESS” - PAWSA

Produced by PAWSA

PAWSA was the guy behind the second of the Nate Dogg bootleg remixes - if that sounds weird to you, it is weird but I covered it in detail when those songs debuted - and it seems like that has actually landed him some vague follow-up success, with our highest debut - weird to say that about a #72 peak thus far - being his single that had been bubbling under for a few weeks. Our story actually starts long before, however, in 1984 with the release of “Don’t Look Any Further” by the late Dennis Edwards featuring Siedah Garrett, an R&B staple that has been prolifically sampled in countless of rap songs, primarily for its bassline and iconic vocal riffs. The original actually only peaked at #45 here, but a cover by M People reached #9 in 1993, whilst Meat Loaf was #1 for “I’d Do Anything for Love (but I Won’t Do That)”, and again, it’s been sampled way more times to even list here, as the songs that sampled it have themselves become iconic, oft-sampled hits like “Shackles (Praise You)” by Mary Mary or “Hit ‘Em Up” by 2Pac. In his new version, PAWSA pitches it down and emphasises the subtler synth funk elements in the original mix to an almost vintage house sound that really is minimal in both presentation and composition, getting by on a classic bassline and some cute but basic drum programming, as well as the flickering synth line and a mixed vocal from Edwards that does not sound great at this pitch. What’s most disappointing is that you could easily turn singular elements of this song into fully realised, new songs as has been done before, so if you’re packaging this as its own thing, not just a remix, it wouldn’t hurt to take a few more artistic risks, and I’m honestly confused as to why PAWSA wouldn’t want to outside of laziness or just knowing that a great sample that was a minor hit back then can be just as successful at a different tempo. This is definitely better than hiss Nate Dogg remix, but I do feel like there could be much more potential here that’s untapped.

Conclusion

I mean, it should be obvious given I’m picking between two tracks, but Andy C and Becky Hill get Best of the Week for “Indestructible” whilst PAWSA snabs the Worst of the Week for “TOO COOL TO BE CARELESS”, though saying I have any strong feelings about these would be a lie. As for what’s on the horizon, I expect Megan Thee Stallion, Central Cee Linkin Park to do some damage but maybe The Chainsmokers, Aitch or Fred again.. can spice things up too. Somehow, the easier weeks end up as the dullest to write. For now, thank you for reading, rest in peace to Rich Homie Quan, and I’ll see you next week!

[januarysneverseensomuchrain]

Rollin' Rain and Hard Thunder - A Compilation Film by Swingin' Pig from Swingin' Pig (alternate account) on Vimeo.

PLEASE READ:

Here it is. I spent about a month editing this video together. I ripped the footage from a bootlegged tape of "Renaldo & Clara," a 1978 film that was edited by Howard Alk and Bob Dylan himself. Some snippets are from Martin Scorsese's incredible Netflix documentary "Rolling Thunder Revue: A Bob Dylan Story." If you'd like to see "A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall" and "One More Cup of Coffee" (both of which are in this compilation) in 4K quality, do yourself a favor and watch it. There are other incredible performances in it that weren't in "Renaldo & Clara."

Anyway, as I was saying, this footage is from a source tape and some of the best quality versions that are available at the moment. Someday these performances will be rescanned, restored and released, but for now, this is what I have to work with visually. I did my best to correct the faded colors, correct the lighting, and sharpen the image a bit, but please realize that this was recorded from a television broadcast in the 1970s, and unaltered since then, so the images won't be perfect.

The audio is a different story, luckily. It took a long time to do, but I successfully overdubbed all of the original low-quality audio (it had a lot of hiss and was broadcasted in mono) with the soundboard recordings released on the Rolling Thunder Boxset. This took longer than I had expected because the footage and audio were sped up in the bootleg tape. But I eventually calculated the difference in speed and was able to synchronize them.

So, please enjoy this labor of love! Below is somewhat of a setlist and some of my personal thoughts on "standout" performances in this video.

CHAPTERS: 0:07 - It Ain't Me, Babe 5:26 - It Takes A Lot to Laugh, It Takes a Train to Cry [Excellent, rocking version] 8:32 - Fascinating historical commentary by David Blue 9:20 - A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall [released on YouTube and on Netflix's "Rolling Thunder Revue" documentary] 14:15 - Romance in Durango 19:05 - Isis [Incredible performance, superior to the one in the documentary. His voice is sheer power and cuts like a knife. I dare say it's Dylan's best-filmed performance of the tour. The way he moves his arms and hands makes you feel like you're looking into another dimension] 24:20 - Never Let Me Go [feat. Joan Baez] 27:05 - Interesting footage of the revue visiting Niagra Falls 27:32 - One More Cup of Coffee (Valley Below) [released on YouTube and on Netflix's "Rolling Thunder Revue" documentary] 31:35 - Sara [Gorgeous version with some beautiful footage I edited together in the beginning. The verse starting at 34:54 has incredible enunciation] 36:21 - Just Like a Woman [This is my favorite version of the song. Just watch listen to the whole thing, uninterrupted. It's just phenomenal. The bridge ("It was raining from the first") is some of the strongest singing I've ever heard from Dylan and then in the subsequent verse, he abruptly drops into this sweet tone. Just phenomenal] 40:32 - Knockin' On Heaven's Door [Beautiful version, superior to the one released in the Netflix documentary. The instrumental at 42:56 gives me chills] 44:35 - An emotional and cathartic ending.

Enjoy this gem while you can!

[bunbeeplays]

The Lemon Legacy: Generation 1, Chapter 56 - A Summer Wedding

It's time for Summer Holiday to become Summer Eggleston. Doesn't quite have the same ring to it, but Summer wants to share a last name with the love of her life more than anything.

Xander, I get you're just Ophelia's plus one and you don't really know these people very well but you could at least pretend to care! I raised you better!

Summer: Mark, we both know I'm the best, but you make me an even better Sim. You taught me that caring for someone can be even better than just caring about myself.

Mark is just like 'what a woman' haha. They're perfect for each other.

Mark: A Strangerville townie with a base game baddie? I'm the luckiest Sim alive. I promise to spend my life being the man you deserve, and you deserve a lot, baby.

Summer, of all people, feeling bashful? Mark's opinion must mean the world to her. Look at how happy she is!

Time to exchange rings! They go great with the rings The Watcher already put on them.

Becca: We're never going to get a wedding like this, The Watcher will probably make us get married off-screen!

Travis: Just be grateful we're getting screentime again, babe.

Congratulations to the Egglestons!

Ophelia is overjoyed for her friends, especially Summer. She deserves this.

With all the wins she's had recently, Ophelia's been very cheerful. I guess enjoying the little things and looking on the bright side is just part of who she is!

Mark and Summer have their first dance away from the crowd.

Summer, for once, doesn't want to be the center of attention. She just wants this moment with her husband.

Also, they refused to dance on the dance floor because there was a trellis on it, I guess.

Apparently if your cooking or mixology skill is high enough, you can improve the drinks from the drink fountain. You learn something new every day.

I don't know what Ophelia put in the punch but it's up to her refined celebrity tastes now.

Libby: Feefs, hey! I see you brought a plus one too.

Ophelia: Libby, you remember Xander. You probably saw our status update on Social Bunny.

Libby: So he was your mystery man all along! Should have guessed. You take good care of her, okay?

Xander: That’s the plan.

Libby: There you are! Ophelia, this is my new girlfriend.

Olivia: Name’s Olivia Meyer. Lib didn’t tell me her ex is a rising star. Looks like she downgraded.

Ophelia can’t help but feel like Olivia looks… oddly familiar. Like if her reflection was goth.

Olivia: Oh, you're with a guy. I thought you were into women.

Ophelia: Uh, I mean, I am. I’m pan.

Olivia: I guess not anymore, huh?

Ophelia: …that’s not how it works.

Ophelia: Sweetie, why don't you introduce yourself to Travis and Becca? You haven't met them yet.

Xander: Sure thing, Lemon Cake.

Xander’s secretly relieved to get away from that conversation. Becca shows him about 7000 baby pictures. He seems like he's enjoying that more.

Libby: You’re never going to believe who Olivia works for. Tell her, babe.

Olivia: it’s not that big of a deal. I’m a street artist but my day job is working as a maid for Brytani Cho.

Libby: Small world, huh?

Ophelia: Yeah, sure is.

Becca: So you guys just… mutually agreed to start dating?

Xander: Yeah, it was pretty smooth.

Becca: That’s boring. No one would read that.

Xander: I’ll make sure something dramatic happens to us to please the readers next time.

Xander: Listen, I don’t want your first impression of me to be that I’m a jealous boyfriend, because I’m not, but is it just me or-

Travis: Does Olivia look a lot like Ophelia if she was alt? Yeah, definitely.

Xander: Oh thank Watcher it’s not just me.

Becca: Yeah, it’s weird.

Travis: Mark, Becca and I have been begging Summer not to bring it up in front of them. We’re still trying to figure out if talking to Libby privately about it is appropriate, but Summer isn’t really known for her tact.

Of course Ophelia needs to talk to the bride.

Ophelia: Congratulations, you look gorgeous!

Summer: Thanks, girly! I'm so sorry things didn't work out with Moses but Xander seems like such a sweet guy.

Ophelia: …I love you, Summer. Never change.

Xander: Congratulations to you both. Thanks for letting Ophelia bring me.

Summer: No prob! But let's make one thing clear. If you hurt that woman, I will end you. I may not have the evil trait, but I will make your life hell.

Xander: You better hold me to it, Mrs. Eggleston.

[maybank612]

Basketball

I have been playing basketball for the majority of my life, mostly because my dad played and he raised me in it. 

I have a game tonight, it is the biggest of the season. There are scouts coming to watch and tonight Kildare High is playing our arch-rival “Kook Academy”. I have been looking forward to this game all week, but today being game day I can only be a little nervous. 

The only thing keeping me kind of sane is knowing that JJ and the rest of the crew are going to be at the game. They all managed to get off of work, and for JJ especially that was amazing. He has only seen me play a couple of times because of work, everytime he watches me play it makes me feel like I can do anything. 

I walk into the locker room and get changed into my gear and slip on my warm up set before heading out to practice before the game. 

As soon as we walked onto the court I could feel the tension in the gym. Pouge and Kooks alike gathered to watch us play. I could feel the panic start to rise back up when I spotted a couple of college scouts, but I was pulled out of my thoughts by a familiar voice. 

“Y/N!!” JJ yelled from the other side of the gym. I turned around to see him with a huge grin on his face. He was standing on the sideline with the rest of my friends behind him.

I could feel the smile crawl onto my face as I made my way over to them. I walked straight to JJ and he wrapped his arms around me pulling me into a hug. 

“Hi hot stuff” I said as we pulled away, leaning my head to the side so I could also have a view of my friends “Pogues” I say with a smile. 

They all returned hi’s and wished me luck on the game before going to get seats in the stands. 

“You're gonna do great tonight babe” JJ smiled as we finally pulled apart our hug. He placed a kiss on the side of my head, and I looked up and smiled back.

“I’m glad you’re here” I said, placing a kiss on his lips. Just as we both tried to deepen the kiss I heard my coach yell “L/n, get your ass over here” 

We pulled apart slightly laughing, “Duty calls” I turned and made my way back on the court only to hear JJ whistle from behind me. I kept laughing as I warmed up, now completely ready for this game. 

JJ POV: 

It was half way through the second half of the game and y/n was on fire. She had 18 points, 6 rebounds, and 5 assists. Kildare is up 56-52 and the girls have been playing great. 

I am in awe of how badass my girl is, everytime she scores she finds my eyes in the stands and sends me a wink. 

She was coming up the court and she passed the ball to her teammate, faking out her defender, and she round the court and got the ball back. Just as she went for the 3-pointer the girl defending her rammed into her and sent her flying to the ground. 

I shot up in worry that she was hurt, she was laying on the floor not really moving. 

“Y/n!” I yelled as she was still not getting up. “Is she okay?” I yelled at her teammate that was trying to help her to her feet. I felt an arm tug on my side to see Kie telling me to calm down that she was fine, but until I heard that from my girlfriend I wasn’t backing down. 

I turned my attention back to the court and saw y/n getting up and searching for me in the crowd, she caught my eye and sent me a wink letting me know that she was okay. 

I let out a sigh of content and sat back down watching her walk to the free throw line. 

She effortlessly made her shots and the game was back on. 

There were 5 seconds left in the game and y/n had the ball running down the court. She managed to get open, all of us on our feet as she stepped behind the 3-point line. The ball left her hands and you could feel the tension in the air, finally the ball dropped through the net and sent us all into a cheering rage. 

My girl had made the game winning shot and I couldn’t be more proud. We stormed the court and I made a b-line for my girl. I could see her searching for me too. Soon enough she jumped into my arms. 

I spun her around as soon as I set her down. She grabbed my face in her hands and pulled me into a passionate kiss. 

We pulled away both giggling. 

“You did it babe, you were so fucking awesome” I told her as she looked into my eyes. 

“You really think so?” she questioned

“I know so” I told her, she had a habit of doubting how talented she was, so I always made sure to remind her. 

Suddenly the rest of our friends and her teammates were surrounding us, sending her congrats. I stepped away and let her enjoy her moment, because she really did deserve it. 

Y/N POV:

I made my way back out of the locker room after going to get showered and changed. I slipped on a black crop top and some plain jeans, throwing JJ’s hoodie over my body to keep me warm. 

As I walked out back into the gym I saw JJ waiting for me with the rest of our friends. John B spotted me first and waved, as I ran and jumped onto JJ’s back.

“Hey superstar” John B said as JJ caught my legs as I wrapped them around his waist. 

“Hi” I giggled at the name her called me

“So what does Kildare high's best basketball player want to do now?” Pope asked, sending me a smile as I hopped back off of JJ backs. 

“Ummm, let me think” I said placing my hand on my chin “Ice cream” I landed on

“Ice cream it is,” Kiara said, guiding everyone toward the door so we could head out. 

JJ pulled me into his side and kissed the top of my head.

“I’m proud of you baby” He whispered into my ear. 

I just looked up at him and kissed his cheek. I then ran after Kiara trying to catch up with the rest of our friends. 

“Hey where are you going?” I heard JJ yell from behind me

“Ice Cream slowpoke, now come on!”

[helenadurazzo]

Ranking Taylor Swift Songs

1. Enchanted

2. Haunted

3. Picture To Burn

4. Better Than Revenge

5. Mr Perfectly Fine

6. Don’t Blame Me

7. Wildest Dreams

8. Getaway Car

9. Timeless

10. London Boy

11. Story Of Us

12. Love Story

13. Mine

14. Long Live

15. Forever and Always

16. Sparks Fly

17. Cruel Summer

18. Our Song

19. The Way I Loved You

20. Bejeweled

21. Dear John

22. The Last Time

23. Now That We Don’t Talk

24. All Too Well

25. Lavender Haze

26. Wonderland

27. Out Of The Woods

28. White Horse

29. Should’ve Said No

30. The Man

31. The Last Great American Dynasty

32. August

33. Long Story Short

34. Fearless

35. Back To December

36. Hey Stephen

37. Message In A Bottle

38. Safe and Sound

39. New Romantics

40. Karma

41. End Game

42. Look What You Made Me Do

43. Exile

44. Welcome To New York

45. Electric Touch

46. Delicate

47. A Place In This World

48. Mean

49. Change

50. I Almost Do

51. I Bet You Think About Me

52. Willow

53. Paper Rings

54. Fifteen

55. Blank Space

56. Style

57. Snow On The Beach

58. Never Grow Up

59. Breathe

60. Castles Crumbling

61. Ours

62. Anti Hero

63. Marjorie

64. It’s Nice To Have A Friend

65. Bad Blood

66. Lover

67. Cardigan

68. Cornelia Street

69. Labyrinth

70. Holy Ground

71. Treacherous

72. You Need to Calm Down

73. Never Getting Back Together

74. 22

75. I Knew You Were Trouble

76. The Best Day

77. I’m Only Me When I’m With You

78. I Can See You

79. Midnight Rain

80. You’re Not Sorry

81. Gorgeous

82. Seven

83. Mirrorball

84. Afterglow

85. Daylight

86. The 1

87. Red

88. I Did Something Bad

89. You’re On Your Own Kid

90. Great War

91. Me

92. This Is Me Trying

93. State of Grace

94. Invisible

95. The Outside

96. You Belong With Me

97. Teardrops On My Guitar

98. Untouchable

99. Today Was a Fairytale

100. Tell Me Why

101. Mary’s Song

102. Tim McGraw

103. Superman

104. Speak Now

105. That’s When

106. Gold Rush

107. No Body No Crime

108. Right Where You Left Me

109. My Tears Ricochet

110. Superstar

111. Don’t You

112. Jump Then Fall

113. Bye Bye Baby

114. I Know Places

115. Ivy

116. Is It Over Now

117. I Think He Knows

118. Cold As You

119. Last Kiss

120. You All Over Me

121. Say Don’t Go

122. Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

123. I Don’t Want To Live Forever

124. Shake It Off

125. Tolerate It

126. Maroon

127. Champagne Problems

128. Mad Woman

129. Tis The Damn Season

130. Starlight

131. The Other Side Of The Door

132. Come In With The Rain

133. You’re Losing Me

134. Invisible String

135. Illicit Affairs

136. Everything Has Changed

137. A Perfectly Good Heart

138. We Were Happy

139. Babe

140. Suburban Legends

141. Stay

142. The Very First Night

143. Wish You Would

144. Bigger Than The Whole Sky

145. Ready For It

146. Come Back Be Here

147. Closure

148. Mastermind

149. Sweet Nothing

150. Sad Beautiful Tragic

151. Stay Beautiful

152. The Lucky One

153. Begin Again

154. Girl At Home

155. Nothing New

156. Better Man

157. Miss Americana and the HBP

158. Paris

159. Question

160. Ronan

161. Forever Winter

162. Tied Together With A Smile

163. The Moment I Knew

164. Betty

165. Hoax

166. Coney Island

167. Clean

168. Call It What You Want

169. New Years Day

170. False God

171. King of My Heart

172. How You Get The Girl

173. You Are In Love

174. High Infidelity

175. Innocent

176. Foolish One

177. Death By A Thousand Cuts

178. This Love

179. So It Goes

180. The Archer

181. The Lakes

182. Dear Reader

183. Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve

184. I Forgot That You Existed

185. Dancing With Our Hands Tied

186. Dorothea

187. When Emma Falls In Love

188. Run

189. It’s Time To Go

190. Cowboy Like Me

191. Glitch

192. Dress

193. Peace

194. Epiphany

195. Soon You’ll Get Better

196. Evermore

197. Happiness

198. Slut

199. Vigilante Shit

200. Stay Stay Stay

[collectivecloseness]

Prompt list

Prompts are now closed! To be opened again for general use soon

Please send in the prompt, including which characters are involved, who is saying what (if you want that specificity), and the genre (eg fluff, angst, smut, etc)!

Reblogs are fine, but do not repost

1) hey. You know i love you, right?

2) I’m blushing because you look good!

3) I’m not letting you go, it’s too risky

4) nobody’s ever done anything like that for me before

5) I only trust you

6) please don’t go, please. Please don’t leave me

7) please? Just one more kiss

8) I got you something

9) you’re cute. // Thanks! ...wait what!?

10) hold my hand

11) tell me you love me

12) don’t let go!

13) I’m not scared when I’m with you

14) I’ve never been in love before

15) this is all your fault

16) I’m gonna catch you

17) *clinging onto their leg*

18) I thought we agreed, no breaking the law unless we were together

19) what are you hiding?

20) you look pretty... I said you look shitty!!!

21) who did this?

22) hey! Don’t talk about yourself like that

23) don’t touch me

24) how am I supposed to trust you

25) that’s where all my clothes went

26) I’m the luckiest person alive

27) I’m packing. What does it look like?

28) it was supposed to be a secret

29) I can’t wait to have this/a baby with you

30) why would you do this? I thought you loved me

31) I can’t do this without you

32) who trashed the place?

33) let me smother you in love!

34) What the hell is that?!?!

35) how are you so perfect?

36) I’m so sorry, I can change

37) I thought you didn’t love me anymore

38) such a good girl/boy/(pet name)

39) no! Hey! Don’t cry!

40) babe. I know you’re not dumb... but how did you believe that???

41) I know you can’t resist my charm

42) what do you mean I can’t go home?

43) do we have to get you to a hospital?

44) I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that

45) how can someone as perfect as you, like someone like me?

46) wait, you really wanna date? Oh thank God, me too

47) how do I ask people out?

48) I need you to get out of my house now

49) but... I love you

50) I have a crush

51) you’re my best friend, I’m here for you

52) oh my god. I think I’m going to faint

53) babe I’m so sorry, but that’s the funniest shit I’ve seen/heard in my life

54) what’s updog?

55) Ow! Why’d you hit me?

56) I don’t believe you

57) did you just smell me?

58) oh my god I wanna have their babies

59) I don’t just want to be friends

60) don’t ever put yourself in danger again!

61) if I find out who did this, I’ll kill them

62) I hate you!

63) you’re so warm/cold

64) (name), it’s me

65) please don’t hurt me/them

66) I had a nightmare

67) you’re too sweet

68) I’m desperately in love with you

69) I’m not going to lie I’m horny as fuck right now

70) I don’t want to do this, but it’s for the best

71) help me...

72) if i don’t get to snuggle with you right now I am going to scream

73) noooo. I’m too sleepy

74) carry me?

75) you want to have a threesome?

76) baby no, how could you ever think that?

77) ...did you just lick me?

78) what the fuck is wrong with you

79) you’re my soulmate

80) no, I’m not going if you’re/they’re not going

81) they’re not dead!

82) it’s not stalking

83) hey, I heard someone’s feeling down

84) I wanna taste you

85) get away from me, leave me alone

86) I can’t handle you being mad at me anymore

87) you’ve been so good

88) no no I want to buy dinner tonight

89) why don’t you go hang out with (name)?

90) quick hide!

91) really? Again?

92) you know I never meant to hurt you

93) wait are you jealous

94) I can’t lose you!

95) I feel like I’m suffocating when you’re not around

96) do you hate me?

97) I can’t do this anymore

98) shit? They told you?

99) don’t be scared, it’s just me

100) I like like you

101) you’re too nice to me

102) you’re a jerk

103) I’m going to save them if I die trying

104) no you’re too pretty

105) it’s all my fault

106) what do you mean they’re in the upside down

107) you don’t have to hide around me

108) that tickles

109) come out come out wherever you are

110) just tell me what’s wrong

111) who knew our first (kiss/date/blank) would be in a hellhole dimension

112) I’ll never let anything like that happen to you again

113) you’re safe now, you’re safe with me

114) if you don’t die I’m going to kill you

115) my family is still here!

116) I almost lost you once. I’m not doing it again

117) please open the door

118) I was so worried about you

119) what’s your problem?

120) come back to bed

121) you’re the only person who hasn’t hurt me

122) please hold on

123) put some clothes on

124) fuck. I could watch you forever

125) you’re way too drunk for that

126) it’s only weed!

127) how are you always falling over?

128) you know I have a front door. Why’d you always use my window?

129) it’s so late, why’d you call

130) I can’t go to sleep without you

131) I think that’s an actual war crime

132) is that blood?

133) I’d never make fun of you

134) you just make me nervous

135) why do crushes make you panic so much?

136) how are they so hot

137) I’ll be your wingman

138) okay what did you do

139) I feel like I don’t need to explain why that’s a bad idea

140) catch me! // NO WAIT IM HOLDING-

141) if (weird habit/kink) is wrong then I don’t want to be right

142) smug ass // you love it

143) I’m not wearing THAT

144) maybe we should wear a disguise

145) should I call sheriff Hopper

146) something’s wrong... they’re missing

147) what no i don’t even like them

148) I’m just going to assume that blood is fake

149) this isn’t my bed

150) I can’t believe this is the moment we’ll have to tell people we fell in love

151) I totally got/scared/pranked you, I can tell

152) who knew fighting a literal monster would look so sexy?

153) hey hey hey, stop that

154) I don’t think I remember the last time we weren’t touching

155) get a room!

156) if I see either of your body parts again I’m taking out my own eyes

157) why date one of us, when you could have us both/all?

158) I thought I’d lost you

159) I love your best friend, but do they have to always be around?

160) you’re such a dork. It’s very attractive

161) you’re lucky you’re cute

162) uh uh! You owe me one

163) quit your job. I’ll look after you!

164) want me to beat them up for you?

165) I think something’s out there

166) I think someone’s watching/following me

167) I don’t want to go back to the upside down

168) fuck... you look so pretty under me like that

169) f- shit yeah! You can dom me!

170) why don’t you care?

171) i just want to make you happy/smile

172) I’m not letting you torture yourself anymore

173) it was an accident, I swear

174) uh, yeah, no, we’re not doing that

175) are you trying to get yourself killed?

176) I could listen to you laugh all day

177) I don’t care what people say, I love you

178) I don’t want a partner I want you!

179) wait did someone hurt you

180) tell me what’s going on

181) you’ve got trauma, it’s not your fault

182) I’ll never let anything happen to you

183) were they bothering you?

184) do you like them more than me?

185) Forget them! You’ve got me. I’m awesome

186) To me, you’re everything

187) I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you

188) No! They’re dead. I don’t care what happens to me

189) Let me pay!

190) Wait, you’ve already planned the date?

191) I’m not calling my kids that

192) It’s not fair! You know you’ve got me wrapped around your evil finger!

193) You know I was joking... right?

194) I promise you that’s not true

195) I can’t lose them

196) are you ignoring me?

197) nice of you to finally drop by

198) they’re not even that good looking

199) hold on tight

200) Fuck me // you wish

[reynie-muldoons]

“A Two-Way Street” liveblog!

So at the time of writing this, I’ve just finished episode 7. I have absolutely no clue what the finale will hold, but the episode summary says something about Number Two’s past? Name drop perhaps??? I guess we’ll see. This really seems like it’s all coming out of nowhere lol.

For the last time this season- and potentially in general if we don’t get renewed- spoilers under the cut!

0:52 I’m like fully expecting them to pan over to Mr B at some point and to see him totally vacant

1:03 Yeah Milligan, come on, turn at the damn hand tree 😂

1:13 “Sorry. I’m having feelings.” you and me both babe

1:41 the house is fully yellow

1:52 “Mother! :D” READ THE ROOM

1:59 …..why would you just stop at “Number”

2:05 oh come on don’t tell me she was actually named Number. Like her legal name is Number? Didn’t they explain in season 1 that was her codename that she adopted for pool or something?

2:17 “my sister, Charity-” WHY DID THEY HAVE TO GIVE MY NAME TO A CHARACTER THAT IS GENERALLY DISLIKED ADKFHKASHF LMAOOOO

2:25 okay the fact that her axe is named Madame Chops and she demands on it being formally introduced makes it a little better 😂

2:32 so what the boy is Number One and she’s Number Two? Did they just write out the whole Pencilla thing???

2:56 both of them are so desperate to have control

2:59 “I have authority as interim director to-” “self-appointed.” “not official.” LMAO BOTH OF THEM ARE SO DESPERATE TO HAVE CONTROL

3:19 they’re just leaving him in the truck by himself when the duskwort has probably already worn off???? They were driving all night ffs

3:26 “you should be very proud of Number Two. she is one of the finest human beings I’ve ever known.” I said this with Milligan last ep- I get that he’s mentally compromised but I genuinely think he would have said that even if he wasn't and that makes me FEEL THINGS

3:31 “it’s a relief to hear that my sister has finally sustained some friendships” I’ll drop kick you

3:33 “I was being sincere!” doubtful

3:42 so what I’m hearing is that One was the favorite child and Number Two had to fight for attention

3:58 “so.. This is family life?” “looks like it.” there’s something morbidly hilarious to me about three kids who raised themselves looking at a nuclear family and being confused

4:42 “I am gaining so much understanding.” it does give some perspective on why number two is Like That

5:11 “oh, don't do this on my account! … I feel amazing.” I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again this whole thing reminds me of a manic episode

6:00 I’m glad she’s talking this through with him

6:40 it’s weird seeing them both in the frame and knowing they’re both tony hale

7:10 “you’re in denial.” someone had to say it

7:43 I don’t see how he could know that, logically

7:54 “what’s that?” “what?” “your neck, what’s wrong?” oop he knows

8:05 and there it is, he’s vacant

8:26 it makes me very sad that this might be the last time we hear this intro in a new episode

9:51 this very much seems like the “handful of almonds” kind of mother, and an unsavory atmosphere to grow up in

10:02 “it would have been nice to hear from you.” “you never pick up the phone!” “I find it a nuisance!” this conversation reminds me of my own mother and that is not good 😅

10:24 “I thought it might play better with your weird swinging pattern.” the backhandedness is not necessary

10:29 “and by the way, I sent letters. You could have written back.” “I'm not about to sleuth out my own daughter’s address!” “it’s right there on the envelope.'' Again, this reminds me SO much of my own mother. Not good

11:48 “One, do you find this lifestyle… stifling?” “No!” couple of things:

1. Don’t love that she’s trying to turn the siblings against each other. Super not cool, and, say it with me now, it reminds me of my mother. Not good

2. Different people have different needs and tastes. Number two said it herself, not everyone is happy to stay where they are

3. Does this whole family situation remind anyone else of breaking Amish? Like the whole thing of letting Amish people leave for a bit to see the world but shaming them for it at the same time? Because that's the vibe I’m getting

12:10 that shot of the house really highlights how many times they’ve added on to it. There are like 4 separate color schemes

12:25 I think the theme of this season is this guy being in denial. Like just in general

13:09 smart of Milligan to lure her inside but at the same time why would they let her go there unsupervised, she could easily get distracted by something or just go somewhere else on a whim

13:35 I stand corrected

13:51 “you were right. This is about control, it always has been” no shit

14:10 very sweet of him to say but that came VERY late

14:14 “oh, I wish we couldve gotten here sooner” PFFFT tell me he didnt just fake that. Curtain would be SO pissed

14:31 “you were faking it?” okay but that also means it’s still coming and they don’t know how to stop it

15:09 “what’s that?” Reynie you know I love you but you’re expecting to be raided. If you see a car, it’s probably them

15:16 INCREDIBLE song choice btw

15:24 I love that they brought the saw back 😂

16:03 why would they wait until the driver can see them pull the trap across the road, that’s dangerous for Miss Perumal and obvious for the driver to avoid

16:21 oh shit did it actually

16:22 “a fact I chose to hide” sneaky. But also wtf was all that build up for last episode? Was he rubbing his neck in the truck for nothing? And the whole faking the catatonia thing feels icky, that scene was incredibly sweet without the context that he was faking it

16:28 “but it changes nothing” dude. DUDE.

16:38 “what you felt a moment ago, that was real. More real than anything you could create.” that’s a big theme of the season, the genuine versus the synthetic

17:10 that shift in tone was unsettling- the music subtly changing plus nathaniel physically moving out of the moment

17:24 are those the people from the other two cars? Where did they get the extra greys from, there were maybe 4 people in each but that is way more than that running through the fields

17:56 “it’s a two-way street!” ….roll credits

18:03 “back off! This is my home.” okay but it isn't though, home is where you belong and you obviously didn’t feel comfortable staying here. It’s where you came from, sure, but not where you’ve settled down to roost. There’s a difference

18:23 so are they like, pulling that book 3 plot of Curtain controlling how things end? Like is that what’s happening? Are we just not going to have any action here after all that build up

18:41 “he helped me see that I've been possibly approaching things in the wrong way.” this feels like it’s coming somehow both for too early and far too late in the narrative

18:45 “and if you told me i’d ever say something like that, well, I’d never say something like that, but here we are.” always eager to save face

18:50 “now. You’re free to go and find your own path.” a hippie to the end. But also you literally told them how to behave for their formative years, you can’t just turn them loose and tell them to figure it out with no guidance when all you’ve done the past however many years is boss them around with an iron fist and bloody rage

19:15 “the door is open. Please. Discover who you are.” whaaaaat

19:29 what am I watching 😂

19:38 “YOUR PHILOSOPHY WILL LIVE ON!” “EVEN WITHOUT YOU!” and just like that the cult lives another day

20:20 well that is unsettling

20:25 ….she did finish an impressive portion of the puzzle though

20:31 “im responsible for this” yeah no shit

20:48 did they just. Take markers to the wall 😂 😂

21:44 I hope this means they’re all going to write shitty poetry insulting themselves in an attempt to make her laugh

22:06 “and as the people she cares about most in this world-”

22:29 this feels very similar to trying to communicate with someone who’s unresponsive in a hospital bed

22:37 “despite the relentless crabbiness, we actually all love spending time with you” awwww stopppp

22:49 remember that time you broke the whisperer with your brain?” we don't remember that actually, enlighten us. Sticky 😂

23:11 “we love you.” dawwwww

23:18 “we’re not making her happy. We’re annoying her.” what’s funny is she’s probably right lol. Spoken like a true former roommate

23:41 pleeease let this lead to insulting poetry. This reminds me so much of season 1 with Reynie trying to get Curtain to laugh himself to sleep with corny jokes

23:55 so is like one blink a sign that she’s coming back online lol 

24:19 I find it hilarious that Kate is not only acknowledging her emotional dependency to her bucket but also encouraging Constance to make a dig at it. Funniest thing to come from this so far

24:20 is the twitching supposed to be a good sign orrrr

24:30 Constance is my favorite rhyming poet lol

24:48 I want to watch them dramatically recite poetry for the next hour, thank you

25:01 The enthusiasm 😂 😂 also she’s like fully short-circuiting now lol

25:13 he does love a good sweater vest

25:20 I cannot believe that worked

25:28 AWWWW SHE’S SO HAPPY SHE CAN DENY IT ALL SHE WANTS BUT LOOK AT THAT SWEET FACE

25:50 “thank you for saying goodbye before abandoning us again.” idk how many times I have to say this but she reminds me of my mother and that’s really not good

25:52 “is it really abandonment if you say goodbye?” okay but the way he was immediately shut down makes me upset

26:35 they have so much unresolved tension

26:53 again, they have so much unresolved tension

27:15 leadership role how?? They’re already there dude lol

27:27 “we would love to.” “in about.. 5 weeks.” LMAO WHAT ARE THEY PLOTTING

27:39 nerd 😂 he is adorable

27:47 “let’s go see Madge.” awwww

27:53 “okay. I was a little needy.” im so glad he’s talking this through 

28:02 “I’ve got two places.”

28:19 everyone load on into the truck again, definitely not a traffic violation

28:32 oh hey, 5 weeks later! We can find out what Rhonda and Number Two had planned!

28:40 VICTORYYYYY

28:42 STOP THEY’RE SO CUTE

28:45 STOOOOOP I CANT WITH THEM, CELEBRATE QUEENS

28:50 I love that she has a bike helmet, I hope she casually rides a motorcycle places

29:14 HE’S VISITING STICKY AKDJFKJSHF

29:06 HE GOT LETTERS FROM EVERYONE

29:16 I get that its a special effect but the lava still looks cool

29:32 a few things:

they’re too damn cute

Kate has no reason to not know what a llama is now

I hope this means they took in the llamas that were previously in the compound

29:47 “you asked for a letter. This fulfills that request.” love to see Reynie voicing his needs to his friends, and love to see Constance being herself lol

29:59 LMAO FOR ANOTHER SWEATER

30:11 tell me that’s the same puzzle

30:17 his sweater is adorable btw

30:29 “then maybe.. Maybe you can find out where I come from?” ohhh my gosh, first of all referring to her past as a puzzle?? Second of all YES BABY GIRL.

30:38 ….theyre 51? Huh?? How does that work with the timeline. I feel like it fucks with the timeline

30:51 “I’m joining the society.” weird. Weird and without base.

30:57 Is it Garrison? Or maybe a Violet cameo? Probably not that but a girl can dream. 

30:57 “turns out, we have a sister.” they’re pulling a Thor: Ragnarok on us. Or maybe a BBC Sherlock.

30:57 We have strayed so far from God.

31:15 that’s it?? They’re just going to leave it there??? You’ve got to be kidding. No way they just pulled the secret sibling card. For the SECOND TIME. and this time it’s not even canon.

~

I’m speechless. This show took a hard turn, then just kept driving that way LOL. what a way to go out… All I can say is I hope the show’s renewed, if only to see their wild ass narrative finished. 

For some quick final thoughts, I think this season is conflicting for me. TPJ is probably my favorite of the books, and at the beginning of the season I was kind of enjoying it more than season 1. Now, they’ve gone SO far off the beaten path, the story is barely recognizable. How will they continue if it does get renewed? Now, we’ve got a New Badder Bitch sister, Curtain moving in for whatever reason (WITHOUT HIS SON???? WHERE IS THIS WALKABOUT), and Constance showing interest in her past. I think this season suffered because of shorter episodes, and probably a lower budget- not to mention them going wildly off-script with the plot. I wanted to like it so much more than I did, which is sad.

Maybe the real SQ was the friends we made along the way. 

All that said, there were some really great moments, and I’m interested to see how the season holds up watching it all back to back with context.

Happy end of the season everybody!! I’m about to go on a reblogging spree for the last couple episodes, but everything should be tagged so it’ll be easy to blacklist if you need to. Let me know what you guys thought!!