#Astarion my fucking beloved

[nostalgiachan]

Uh-oh, sisters, we're really in it now

[tadpole-apocalypse]

I sometimes think about Astarion having to escort Cazador as his pretty accessory anytime he left the estate.

🫠

[albaharu]

after a life of dwarves on top of barrels to kiss your lover in dragon age im so happy they animate everyone kneeling to hug and kiss the dwarf...

[thechaoticdruid]

AsTaRiOn Is A sUbBy BoTtOm

Hmmm......I don't believe you.

This man is always trying to pin me down.

[dnncats]

slaying while slaying 🔪🩸

still + alt color:

[lepusrufus]

How about some more Werewolf Shady shenanigans for the soul

(Yeah ik druids or drow don't canonically have sharp teeth but I like to hc them like that and thought it aligns pretty funny in the wolfy Shart AU)

[pluviatrix]

everything i have learned about this fucking character both through osmosis and under duress has made me feel without any hyperbole completely unhinged. every new piece of information i stumble across through NO fault of my own has me gagging and sobbing and choking and shitting what do you MEAN. WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!! the fact that I can't run baldur's gate is a mercy to everyone following me right now. thank your lucky stars that you have been spared.

[littlestarbigfangs]

[Was it true what they said? That you gave up fighting him long ago?]

"You don't know what it was like! There was no way out!"

[circlesofkell]

Since the intimate night you spent with Gale at Moonrise Towers, he knows how you feel about Mystra and his fixation on the powers of the gods. But when Mystra summons him to an audience, the gravity of her demands threatens to tear you both apart. Tested under Mystra's hand in the chasm of the Weave's crushing weight, it will take the most divine of corporeal forces to bring Gale back to himself.

(Linked fic contains explicit sexual themes and language, 18+ only)

“Perhaps,” you smile in spite of yourself. “In any case… there could be some peon scrabbling in the dirt somewhere who may find you close enough to divinity just as you are.” 

He closes the distance between your bodies. “And who might that be, to confer such lofty praise on this ignoble wizard?”

“No one I know of!” You glance surreptitiously sideways, trying to evade his way of looking past your defenses, looking into you, looking through you. “It’s purely a hypothetical consideration.”

“Hmm, of course, purely hypothetical.” He slides an arm around your waist and takes your jaw delicately in his powerful hand. As you glance up from under your lashes to meet his lustrous gaze, your heart leaps into your throat and seizes against your will. “Hypothetically, of course,” he muses, “such a person could never be described as a scrabbling peon. Enchanting treasure, perhaps… celestial scion, probably. Resplendent idol of magnificence, almost certainly. But scrabbling peon? A woefully inaccurate depiction.” The torches flicker warm shadows across Gale’s face.

“Hypothetically, of course,” you smile coyly, “such a person would probably be quite taken with you under this torchlight… concentration could be off the table altogether.”

His cocky grin flashes bright in the low orange light of the braziers. “Perhaps I could think of some way to entice such a hypothetical person’s focus.”

Longing burns sweet and twisting in the pit of your belly, pulling you in closer toward the heat of Gale’s body. You slip your hand between the parting of his long robe and rest one finger on the waistband of his trousers. “Hypothetically,” you breathe, “such a person might entreat you to indulge her imagination a moment longer.”

He lifts one eyebrow slightly, a sliver of his tongue tracing the line of his white teeth across his enamored smile. “You know how I live to indulge you.”

[beresaad]

Here's my little treat with their cheeks all flushed. You will come to my bed tonight, won't you?

[...]

But you... you I'll remember. Have a fine evening, dear.

[eliseamann]

Dialog options I wish I had in bg3 - Part 5 „Justice for Barcus“

I was so happy when I was able to save everybody from moonrise towers and then Wulbren ruined it completly for me!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Transcript:

Wulbren: „I said GO HOME!“

Umdòmiel/Tav: „If you don‘t want him, I‘ll take him.“

Barcus joined the Party

Karlach: „You have some new friends now, soldier!“

[bg3-brainwormed]

I think Durge should get to rip out Cazador’s whiny ass vocal cords + trachea. With their teeth. As a treat.

[dullahanblorboposting]

Baldur's Gate 3 spoilers I guess but

I cannot stress enough how amazing it is that Astarion gets to brutally inflict a bit of the same torture on his abuser that had been done to him (carve the '''poem''' into his back), but then ALSO gets to viciously stab the shit out of said abuser. Like, a lot.

And this is treated 100% straight as the good and correct option by the game. It's actually ESSENTIAL to his growth and redemption. You kill Cazador either way, and the visceral rage fueled stabbing spree is the GOOD ending.

This is very hot and sexy of bg3 to do.

[thechaoticdruid]

Not my horny GOT loving ass thinking about an AU where (Fem) Tav is one of Cazador's mortal relatives, a niece if you will, and is sent to live with him after her family ends up dying in a fire. Cazador ends up planning on marrying Tav off for political gain, wanting to use her to manipulate her future husband (who in this instance I assume would be someone powerful amongst the nobility). The only issue is Tav is innocent and inexperienced, shy and meek. Not someone skilled in the art of seduction.

So Cazador assigns Astarion to be her 'teacher' and well through some events Tav ends up falling in love with Astarion and vice versa which very much complicates the fact that Tav has to marry someone else!

Can't help but also think about innocent sweet Tav melting his heart by always being concerned about Astarion during their 'lessons'.

She can tell something isn't right sometimes when he touches her and insists they don't have to do anything! That she would just deal with her uncle.

But of course Astarion is too afraid of what Cazador would do to either of them to let her do that.

Oh well I thought this was going to be a horny fic idea but then it turned into angst. Eh that's good too. The idea is up for grabs if anyone wants to take it, but @ me so I can read if you write it plz.

[mynamesnotjim]

turned my whole crew into a glam rock band, fuck with me