#Anxiety will not elaborate
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fucked up so hard forgot to eat enough today and was out in the heat and had a massive migraine after getting home 😭 just woke up from desperation nap trying to make it go away thank GODs it did, I never get migraines that was awful how do people cope w that on the reg
going to make sure my iPad charged and finish up a few things - expect an art dump tomorrow and some filthy shit I wrote during horny hours the other night 🫣🥵
there’s like 2 people waiting on a message back from me I’ll get to you before I pass out or in the morning - we’ll see how long I last before I pass back out 😂 thanks for being rad and so patient y’all are a blessing truly I love this fandom
#Personally unhinged#That’s my personal/Venus chats stuff#Feel free to block if you’re only here for fic/art#Also realizing w my new friends patience maybe I am overly hyper aware of how frantic/late to things I am#AM I EVEN LATE#For a deadline I set myself?#My therapist giving me the side eye like : you do this to yourself you know#Hahahahaha#sorry I’m so sensitive about it I am fully expecting to be chewed out and yelled at at any minute for falling asleep or not R E A D Y for#….for what??? Unclear#Anxiety will not elaborate#Anyway#I’m gonna go ham on these sketches I thought of some great details to add before sending screens#And then I’m gonna write shach and pen helping reader calm down from an anxiety attack bc I could use tjat#I think my heart would be pleased
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People seems to really like my inside out art so here’s more :) and even MORE JOYNESS !!!!!! And angfear I think
#inside out#inside out 2#inside out joy x sadness#joyness#inside out fear#i don’t wanna tag further anymore#there’s so many tags#aughheehhh#inside out anger#inside out anxiety#I will not elaborate#meow meow#me after the lobotomy#kills you
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i have this hc/theory abt the ad oblivione, time loops, istaroth and venti (ad oblivione is mentioned in the aranara quest) where istaroth created the ad oblivione by giving birth to the thousand winds - she is time itself while they are erosion, like the sun and its rays! - and let them experience everything in the original timeline, then afterwards she formed the thousand winds into the ad oblivione, creating the time loop, then repeating the cycle with new winds until the loops are complete (yk that note in fontaine that goes through all the calamities/loops? hyperborea, etc? yeah) and mond is the end which is why its so important
venti was a part of the original thousand winds and escaped when istaroth formed the ad oblivione, which is why that note in the thousand winds temple/nameless island is a thing (ill get the actual sources later, just getting thoughts out 😭) and also why he’s considered the prodigal son
reason i wrote this all is bc i was doing ‘research’ (doing my once in a blue moon scroll on twitter and looking at theories) and later saw this poem abt the brain organoids on tiktok and and ☹️
#venti#genshin impact#genshin#genshin venti#genshin barbatos#genshin impact venti#theory#venti headcanons#headcanon#venti theory#venti lore#istaroth#kairos#ad oblivione#thousand winds#ALSO SORRY I NEVER FINISHED ANY OF MY DRAWINGS#i keep getting unmotivated#but im taking anti anxiety so that might help#i will reblog with the sources once i have collected them all#and elaborate on parts that need it!#sorry if this is weird#���
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Big Huge Irritated Rant About The Latest COTL Update's Story Choices and the Implications
So the lore drop in the new Cult of the Lamb update, Unholy Alliance, pisses me off. The writer's confirmation of what that lore drop means pisses me off more.
Why? Because it's unnecessary recontextualization that was made pretty obviously in favor in one character in particular, and somehow in that process makes that very same character way less interesting. I think it's incredibly detrimental to the story and I will Explain Why in a second.
But before I do, I just want to put this out there: Prior to this update, my opinions on the Bishops and Narinder and that entire plotline were pretty neutral. I'm an NPC enjoyer, I spend my time thinking about that moth with two lines of dialogue. I did not previously have strong opinions on Narinder or Shamura outside of mild dislike for fandom treatment. So I'm not coming from a place of bias here (or at the very least I'm not trying to be). I genuinely, wholeheartedly, 100% believe this writing decision was unnecessary and the Wrong one to make, and I think it severely undercuts the original plotline because this was a retcon and one that sucks pretty bad.
Ok we're on the same page here? Ok awesome. Long rant ahead, and obvs spoilers for the Unholy Alliance update
So first, what the hell am I talking about? What part of the update do I not like? Let's clarify that first.
It's Shamura's dialogue. Like, all of it. For ease of understanding, here is all the dialogue I will be talking about:
"Ah... we gathered here, the four of us, a council of war and I the general. I have not forgot. I did not tell them that chains to bind a God must be forged of Godly matters. What matter of Gods? What matters of Gods? I have not forgot. The betrayal of kin, the breaking of spirits, blood spilled, his and ours. ...the sacrifice of what we had sacrificed so much for... ...shaped into shackles for our own brother. And our wounds always to weep. Such sharp claws..."
--
"He sought to break nature's own laws. Death was his, yet he placed his sacred duty in peril. His experiments... Experiments I encouraged. I am not... blameless. My soul, stained... yet I do not... Ah, The story. Yes the story... He wanted to open the doors between Life and Death, to... to allow their return. Those mere... mortals. Even though he knew their sacrifices, their faith, their fears sustain us. Death must be the end. Otherwise, what use would they have for Gods? They began to flock to him. What he promised, we could not match. He swelled with devotion... while we waned. Would he have let us perish? I could not take... the risk... the hunger... You are lucky there are none left to force such a choice on you. Hail, Lamb. Last God... lonely God... Ah... I feel... unburdened..."
And for fun, before anyone tells me I'm misinterpreting any of this or that it's left up to interpretation or is intentionally vague, Word of God (the writer of CoTL):
And it's this being Word of God that's spurred me into making this post to begin with. Because prior to this, I just seethed about this dialogue's implications in my server and hoped I was wrong. But now it's been confirmed what this means, and I'm . Disgruntled, to say the least!
And since I've started writing this post, there's been another addition made to further clarify parts of this. But I'm going to go over that addition more towards the end, because it also irritates me for separate reasons.
So, let's get this straight.
Prior to this update, the specifics of what happens between Narinder and the Bishops were pretty vague. We were told Narinder was "gluttonous in his ambition," per Shamura's previous dialogue, and that they "introduced him to ideas of change" but "Death cannot flow backward." Heket somewhat elaborates on this by saying he preached "heresy" and "noxious ideals" that would not be tolerated. Heket also notably refers to Narinder as a flat-out "monster." Narinder attacked his siblings and left them each with a big, symbolic wound. Then he was chained by the four of them, with Shamura the one to lead it (in their own words).
There's a lot of talk of betrayal, but before this update, it was unclear if the betrayal was meant to just be Narinder's experimenting with death (which even then was pretty heavily suggested to be resurrections) or the wounds inflicted upon his siblings. There's also a lot of talk of sacrifice, i.e. from Leshy if you kill Heket before him: "After everything we did. After everything we sacrificed. He will not be satiated."
Regardless, the picture this painted was of Narinder being this ambitious, evil, violent God that even his fellow Gods (Kallamar) feared and felt needed controlling. The idea that the wounds could have been in the nail in the coffin to this entire ordeal made sense; as they were obviously planned by Narinder to some extent (otherwise why be so intentional about who got what wound?) and a fair reaction to Being Mutilated would of course be to chain him.
Then of course there's the idea that the wounds were given while he was being chained and in self-defense, which only seems possible if you think Narinder could take on all four of his siblings at once like that and only manage to lose his claws in the ordeal (which was only revealed in this update to be something he's implied to have lost thru the relic). I thought this at first too, but realized it seems pretty impractical for that to have been the case if the wounds were also purposeful in who got what. I mean, sure, they could all be coincidentally symbolically appropriate for each Bishop, but I have doouuubts?
but now we're here, with this update, and all has been revealed.
And what's been revealed exactly?
Narinder's thing he was doing was indeed resurrections (we knew that)
Shamura encouraged him to do it (we also already knew this)
It seems like he did literally nothing else outside of that
His siblings got pissy about this because it made their domains purposeless and got all their followers to flock to him
"Would he let us perish? I could not take the risk" - Implies they literally did not even ask him
Shamura knew that in order to forge chains that could keep Narinder down, it would require a sacrifice of their bonds AND their flesh
They DID NOT tell the other Bishops this
Their wounds were requirements to chain him. They had to get the wounds they bear now in order to chain him. ONLY Shamura knew this. That means they allowed their siblings (and themself) to get attacked knowing full well what would happen. They may have even encouraged it, perhaps provoked Narinder into it, seeing as they knew the wounds were necessary to have him chained. (Or they just knew he would retaliate. Which, like. Yeah. They're condemning him after he went down a path they encouraged and, as far as we can tell, nothing else.)
And for... what?
In this version of the story, Narinder was experimenting with resurrections, and Shamura told him to keep doing that. Then he was successful, mortals turned to him, and his siblings (including Shamura, the one who told him to do it) got mad. That's it. That's their reasoning for chaining him. There's nothing else given. "Would they perish?" We have no idea. Is that how it works? Seems like Shamura doesn't know either. Or at the very least doesn't know if Narinder intended for that at all. Gives the vibe that literally no effort was made to talk to him and figure this out. They don't even really go down the "it puts nature out of balance!" path, which would at least have some merit, maybe. It's literally just "we are no longer sustained. What's the point of Gods in this world?" <- idk babe you had all the other ones slaughtered. So you tell me
And then Shamura just took it into their own hands, leading their siblings to their shared wounds (WITHOUT consulting them) and their inevitable destruction because of........... reasons, I guess. (I mean, if you think about it really hard, they probably also already knew what would happen following all this. With the lamb genocide and Narinder's resurfacing and etc. And they had their siblings wounded anyway. For no god damn reason)
And now why does this make me mad?
Because, honestly, in and of itself, there's not anything necessarily wrong with this added context. It's not contradicting anything in the main game. Shamura knowing what was needed makes sense, after all.
But it's... unnecessary. It screws up the motives and makes them more shallow, less nuanced, more... petty. Making gods petty is cool and all, I love doing that honestly, but in this case it just feels like a waste of potential.
But beyond all that. But most importantly.
This entire recontextualization of events REEKS of being made specifically to absolve Narinder.
I mean, come on. He's made out to be the victim, here. Shamura knew what he would do, knew what he would become, and knew exactly what would happen to their siblings if they sought to chain him (without doing so much as talking to him beforehand), and yet they encouraged it.
All blame is being shifted on Shamura. All Narinder did specifically against his siblings was inflict the wounds, which at this point seems to be hinted as self defense or a retaliation against threat or insult (assuming he was provoked into attacking, somehow). Because the wounds were part of the process.
And almost equally irritating, this seeks to arbitrarily absolve Leshy, Kallamar, and Heket as well, as they had no idea what the plan was and were just strung along. Which is just kinda worse, right? As far as they are aware, Narinder did just randomly attack them for no reason, and this wasn't foreseen, and surely couldn't have been stopped. All because Shamura didn't tell them any of it.
Shamura is being made into the big bad. Shamura is at fault for everything, for all of it. Narinder is a victim of Shamura encouraging him down a path they later condemn him for, their siblings are victims of Shamura and Narinder both (the latter of which could have been resolved at any point prior), and now any possible intrigue about Narinder being this big bad guy who tore apart his siblings due to his own ambition getting the best of him is ERASED.
It's GONE. All in favor of making him more sympathetic.
And sure, about a million different excuses could be made for Shamura, or could be used to headcanon whatever you want about exactly what happened. But with what we're given right now, just from the source, no attempt as made to stop Narinder before it got to this point. It is literally suggested they didn't even talk to him.
"Maybe they were too scared" - For the other three, maybe. Shamura is the eldest and clearly the most respected one, by Narinder as well (he holds some amount of respect for them even STILL. After EVERYTHING). They at any point could have stopped this.
"Narinder could still have been a bad guy outside of the attacks" - Sure, but we're given little to nothing on that front. In the old dialogue, literally all that's mentioned is the resurrection stuff and the wounds. Shamura is the one who said his ambition made a glutton of him, by the way. And hell, this isn't even touching the very real possibility that all of the Bishops (Narinder included!) are unreliable as hell.
"But Kallamar feared him even before his chaining, that suggests he was still a bad guy beforehand" - Sure, it could! But that's about all we get! And hell, in this new update, Kallamar's fears are fucked with, too. He states:
"Once, long ago, Followers would worship at my altar just to glimpse the beauty of my temple… of course, it could not last forever. Perhaps my siblings did not understand this, but I have always known. It did not make me less afraid. Cowardly Kallamar, ha…"
Here, it seems Kallamar's fears have been changed to be more about the decline of his temple and the loss of his followers, which was happening because of Narinder. He refers to Narinder's plans as "foolish" as opposed to... idk, horrifying, or threatening, or whatever. He also fully takes on the 'cowardly' title, giving the impression that his fears were somehow unfounded, which wouldn't make a lick of sense if Narinder indeed sucked ass outside of the wounds.
Not to mention he "didn't want to hear it" when Shamura "revealed the plan," but we know because of Shamura that they didn't mention anything about the wounds, so Kallamar didn't want to hear that they... had to chain Narinder? That's literally all he could've been told about the plan. Why wouldn't he want to chain Narinder if he was scared of him up until that point?? Doesn't make any sense!!! EDIT AFTER I POSTED: On reconsideration this might just be referring the lamb genocide plan, but that's hardly better, because now this update absolves Narinder, Leshy, AND Kallamar by making them blameless in everything (both Leshy and Kallamar expressed not fully understanding the plan for the slaughter or, in this case, not wanting part in it). What's up with THAT. Why is Shamura getting the blame for LITERALLY EVERYTHING.
Anyway, my point is
This was a story decision made to make Narinder sympathetic. It's so blatant. And it's so, so irritating. It gets rid of so many potential cool flaws of Narinder and replaces it with "Actually, Shamura was the bad guy the whole time! Huzzah!"
And honestly, had the entire game come out like this to begin with, released at the start how it is right now, I don't think I'd care this much. But being added now, as an afterthought, after the fandom and devs alike have grown to favor Narinder above all others, it just...
It reeks of favoritism. It smells of revising the story to make Narinder more likeable. It's just erasure.
And for what. Like, I don't want to be That Guy, but I cannot help but notice that one of two nonbinary characters (outside of the Lamb/Goat themselves) is being this heavily demonized in favor of absolving a Man of his crimes. What's, uh. What's up with that.
Oh, and that addition by the writer I mentioned was made while I was writing this.
This was made after Jojo was questioned whether this was a retcon as to who caused the wounds, as this whole thing could also certainly be read as Shamura being the one to directly wound their siblings (which I didn't think was the case, but still).
"I don't know if they thought it would be so severe" - How do I put this in a nice way. This feels like a weaseling out answer. This feels like giving Shamura an out only after being questioned on this writing choice. How could they possibly not know how severe it would be. This spider is Knowledge. This spider has Foresight of some kind. And how do you not know what they thought. You are the Writer. If you want to clarify something like this you gotta say it with your full chest.
Not to mention a good portion of the fandom probably won't even see these tweets, so this context is all missing from the story presented in the game. This is Tacked On Context on top of already Tacked On Context. It's unnecessary retconning all the way down.
Anyway. I realize the fandom at large will not care about this, because (and I mean this in the nicest way I can manage) the Narinder favoritism in this fandom is already impenetrable, but for me personally? This retconning that was so clearly done out of that favoritism?
It ruined Narinder's character for me. More than the fandom possibly could have. I mean, if it's fanon, it can be ignored. But this was canonized. Because Narinder is the dev team's favorite guy.
And I can't stand it.
#VERY long ramble#<- i mean it. this post is chunky.#I have a lot of thoughts. And they are not positive. MM dev team when i get you.#Narinder enjoyers beware. I do not like your man and it's because of this update.#If anything I said in the post is unclear please feel free to ask and I will elaborate where I can! I tried to make my thoughts#as clear as possible. but i am also a fulltime college student with a keyboard that is currently retaliating against me.#My brain is a little scattered atm lmao. but if I hold onto this post much longer I might just anxiety myself out of posting it.#because nobody else seems to be having these same critiques. Save for my tiny little discord server where we are all very loud haters.#If you don't agree with me that's awesome 👍 please be normal about it tho if you are arguing i'm begging.#if this post gets any amount of traction I'm going to be wary about having my inbox open hkjsdhg#ok now the scary part.#cult of the lamb#cotl unholy alliance#cotl spoilers#unholy alliance spoilers#<- i don'tknow if that still needs tagging but jic. also I'm wary of tagging characters on here. so for now i won't.#cotl#ok that's it for now. Runs away. Fast
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I know that there’s a lot of controversy surrounding Mazey Day but what I got from it is that even if the supernatural was real, paparazzi would STILL be the worst kind of monster ever
#something something#i can’t elaborate I have the flu and also an anxiety attack#black mirror#mazey day
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With this he looks like a weird but fabulous aunt idk
#Im sorry but self esteem is low again and I hate this haha#But ey#It is what it is#myart#fan art#fanart#käärijä#jere pöyhönen#käärijä fanart#kaivohuone#This gig gave me so much anxiety but I will not further elaborate on it
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brainrot for the stupid lil shadow got to strong today
please enjoy my heavily headcannoned post-good end stranger design, obviously not in the right colors but i can only make the details so visible in all black.
#of course it was this fucker that broke through my months long art block#and my social anxiety since im pretty sure ive never posted art here before#of much of anywhere outside of artfight#also i have a name for this guy#originaly it was just gonna be a regular stranger#but too many plot-y details started popping up#so hes named GrowingPains#might elaborate on his deal if ya'll ask#or even if you dont#i like this guy#omori#omori stranger#omori au
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First oc post i am shaking crying throwing up for multiple reasons and also anxious as hell- anyways, meet the man, the failure disaster gay, the forever doomed ginger(derogatory/lh)
I forgot to add his birthday omg, it's march 13th
Lore utc (i wrote a lot lmao), the uh post ch 134 stuff will be elaborated on later (or if asked. Actually, ask me anything about him. And my other oc's once they're posted. Please. I will answer in great detail. I also need a distraction. Pls.)
So basically, among the first few vampires (a 4th progenitor to be percise) turned by Shikama was a woman who showed great potential for spells and magic. She had a loving husband and child which she tragically lost in an accident. Upon turning into a vampire, her family was still the only thing on her mind. She accepted to help Shikama in his endeavors to revive Mikaela since she hoped she could revive her own family in the proccess. Unfortunately it didn't work. Disillusioned, she abandoned vampire kind and started searching for the possible reincarnation of her beloved husband, whom she may be able to have a child with and have family again.
Fast forward a a lot, and I mean a lot, of years and she arrived in 60s japan. None of the people she had hope for turned out to be the reincarnation of her late husband until that fateful day. She encountered a (rather pathetic may I add) man in his late 20s and it was like a miracle. The woman cornered the man in disbelief and from this awkward first meeting blossomed true love. Then everything went to shit lmaooo
The first problem was that the mans family didn't approve of the woman. Tough this didn't stop their love. Next was the issue of bearing a child, something that a vampire simply can't do. Well, an ordinary one but this woman was anything but ordinary. By some impossible miracle she bore a child. A biological child. (GIRL HOW?? We will never know and frankly, i don't want to think about it💀)
The child was, as expected tbh, kind of a disaster. Already born with pointy ears and sharp fangs. The child needed both human food and blood to properly sustain themselves. Drinking blood outside of their family would permanently stop their aging. Despite this, the couple was overjoyed. (And then named their child "mistake" bc that would help /s.) They named him "Machigai". Why tho?? I dunno man something along the lines of "a mistake but the best mistake of their life" bruh
So after Machigai was old enough to walk, but not old enough to remember, the mother diappeared, leaving father and child behind. The father did his best to raise such an... extraordinary child but it was understandably kind of impossible. Machigai grew up alone and isolated from his peers. He was always wearing a hood of some kind and rarley opened his mouth to talk. In high school, he met a girl who he became good friends with but she is another oc I'll post about sometime adlf,wpl.
Anyways! Come Machigai's high school graduation and 18th birthday, his father... disappeared. All he left was a note saying, that Machigai now owned the apartment and that there is enough blood in the fridge to sustain Machigai's thrist while he could grow and mature. To an already depressed and disillusioned Machigai this obviously didn't help. Throughout the next years he became a shut in, who only left the house if absolutely necessary. All he did all day was play video games, watch tv and later be on the internet. Once he ran out of his fathers blood was when things changed. He had to go out and actually find a new source of blood. Welp, sorry to unlucky bastards who went into dark alleyways at night bc these types of people became Machigai's source of blood. (That's when he stopped aging)
On one of these nightly escapades, Machigai was greeted by a large man in a neat black suit who called himself "Saito". Saito claimed to have known Machigai's mother and offered a deal: Machigai would offer up his unique constitution to the Hyakuya sect's research and in turn get a well paying job and a guaranteed source of blood. He agreed. "Welcome to the Hyakuya sect. I look forward to your performance"
Machigai was practically a lab rat for the development of cursed gear. Thanks to his half-n-half physiology he could tank wounds from cursed gear/magic n shit while still providing useful data to how effective it is. During this time Machigai aquired knowledge of vampire culture(?), became familiar with magic and it's quirks and learned how to perform simple spells and whatnot.
Around 2011, when the internet was already fairly well used, Machigai came across a forum dedicated to paranormal sightings. Various users claimed that a secluded spot in Kyoto was home to vampires. (Ferid was the one spreading these rumors btw) Most would have dissmissed this as someone wanting attention, yet Machigai was intrigued. He was well aware that vampires existed across the world but he mever knew how to actually contact them. Perhaps out of morbid curiosity, perhaps out of a genuine want for connection with people like him, he went to check out the spot. There, he met none other than the eccentric Ferid Bathory who specifically manufactured the rumor to meet Machigai (extra much?). He was well aware of Machigai's work for Rígr "Saito" Stafford and was trying to one up his father by stealing his most prized lab-rat. Machigai declined, not trusting a single thing out of that vampires mouth. Ferid left, already proclaiming that one day Machigai would be working for him.
Machigai stuck around that area as it was already well into the night and public transport wouldn't start up until the early morning. There he met another vampire: Crowley Eusford. Their meeting wasn't planned or meticulously calculated, it was actually rather awkward. Their chat was meaningless and short but in the end leagues above whatever Ferid likes to plan. Crolwey has already unwillingly heard about this curious being from Ferid and seeing Machigai himself left him wanting to learn more about him. Machigai was left a little hopeful, that perhaps it's not too late for him to look for connections.
So the apocalypse rolls around-
Machigai makes a deal with Saito that in exchange for his freedom (*eagle screech*) he would keep his mouth shut about anything the Hyakuya sect discovered while Machigai was there.
Machigai seeks out the Demon Army where he successfully keeps his half vampire identity a secert until someone on his squad gets blackmailed into revealing it. Before that, he gets a cursed weapon, a pair of daggers. And lo and behold, the demon possessing the daggers is his own mother. Unfortunately since the now demonic mother didn't witness Machigai growing up, she falsey believes to be able to still shape Machiagi to her will. After getting locked up by the army, Machigai completley gives up, only wishing for his miserable existence to end (spoiler: It won't! Ever. :) ). He ultimately loses any and all trust he has in humanity or just anything in general.
After about half a year of grueling torture and some experimentation, Machigai gets freed (kidnapped) by Ferid and promptly brought to Kyoto Sangiuem. Krul Tepes, finding Machigai to be useful in her fake-ish war against humanity and whatever she's planning with Yuu and Mika, lets him be part of the japanese vampires under Ferids faction. Ferid found himself unwilling to deal with the often uncooperative and irritated new "recruit" so he did what he does best and made it Crowley's problem.
After a rather agressive and disrespectful first impression, Machigai was officially a... coworker? of Crowley and thus also Chess and Horn in Nagoya. The three got the additional task by Ferid to somehow domesticate this feral and angry stray animal and get him to open up. At least that's how Ferids orders were phrased. Shenanigans, Drama and FeelingsTM ensue.
(How did I write so much??)
#might be obvious but yes i am going down an oc x canon route with machigai amd crowley teehee#ahem ok so i should probably make a tag for my ocs#nono's ocs#there. wow. so creative.#otherwise i could have (and tbh i want to) elaborate on certain event's but this post is alr so long#i'm normal. so normal. if you search up the word normal you will see my picture#this is also huge coping with chapter 134 if you haven't noticed#most of the doodle page was actually done while i was in class#top student behavior amirite#enough rambling#owari no seraph#seraph of the end#crowley eusford#oc#original character#chess belle#horn skuld#ferid bathory#posting this took a solid week of wrestling with my anxiety#shit got hands
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you guys know the talon-lock freefall death spiral bald eagles do for their courtship ritual? i think dior and nimloth had the same energy in their relationship
#i'll elaborate on this one day but. i imagine that they gave the elves around them the save sense of anxiety trepidation amazement#fascination secondhand exhilaration that humans experience from watching the eagles do their thing#elves as i picture are most accustomed to long long long slowly building relationships over time (though exceptions very much exist)#meanwhile there's these two who had the hots for each other pretty much from moment one when they meet in menegroth. and worse they#were NOT shy about brazen flirting and making their interest mutually known even though they weren't actually together at the time#lots of deliberately seeking each other out to dance together during parties and cheeky back and forth ignoring everyone else#plus eye contact that's uh. a SMIDGE too intense to be doing in public guys come on. get a room for the love of elbereth#then in a few months: what do you MEAN you two are engaged???? oh he's princess luthien's son all right...#hm i think like. they're the exact inverse of starwing (my image of starwing at least) in terms of how the romance developed#dior#dior eluchil#dior eluch��l#nimloth#nimloth of doriath#dior x nimloth#tolkien tag#tolkien#the silmarillion#the silm#silm#lord of the rings#lotr#the lord of the rings#jrr tolkien
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What if I threw up
#Ezra’s IRL dating adventures#tw emetophobia#let me know if anyone needs this tagged some other way pls/gen#not gonna elaborate on this btw#just kidding I’m going to#nothing has happened but that’s exactly WHY I feel a little nauseated with anxiety lmao#I need to fucking SLEEP but my brain won’t fucking SHUT UP
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What's your all-time favorite Bob's Burgers episode? Like this is YOUR episode? (You can list multiple if you want!)
Oooh my all time all time favorite is Carpe Museum! Its the first episode featuring regular sized rudy who's one of my favorite characters now and i love how that friendship with louise started and its such a sweet bob and louise episode as well.
Its also the first time the show explores the dynamic between gene and zeke which of course gave birth to my life long love affair with genezeke, their personalities mesh so well and the silly nicknames/pet names on zekes part??? I live for that.
Its my sisters favorite episode too and bc the belchers are eerily similar to my own family its always been something my family watches and enjoys and loves together so it makes me happy that me and my sister have the same favorite episode and that fact only makes me love the episode even more.
Plus cute boblin and isn't that the first henry haber episode too? Lots of good stuff.
Close seconds include in no particular order of importance:
Gene it on (cheerleader gene lives rent free in my heart i like to think he still does it just off screen)
The runway club (breakfast club episode? The little bits of school staff lore? Especially mr branca? The cotton candy festival which i desperately want an episode about? Iconic)
Poops! I didn't do it again (when i say the belchers are eerily similar to my family this is one episode id point too and i will not elaborate)
Work hard or die trying girl (im a theater kid at heart)
#asks#bobs burgers#listen my dad is a grumpy cook who lobes old movies but doesn't know that much about them and has a dead mom#and a bad relationship with his own dad and the same sense of humor as his youngest daughter#my mom is a loud dramatic italian woman who sings everything and is overly positive sometimes to combat my dads pessimism and anxiety#my older sister has strong morals and has always been a huge book worm wrote a lot of fanfic in her highschool and college years#and has always been much more romantically motivated and 'boy crazy' than me#we don't have a middle brother#but my sister jokes that i have too many interests and too much personality so Loren bouchard was forced to split me into 2 characters#and im very similar to both gene and louise in a litany of ways#blah blah i guess i did elaborate i just think its funny i can't believe he based that show on us fr fr#those are just the sweeping generalizations i could get SPECIFIC with my examples
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Do you enjoy t4t eiffera headcanons because I just think they have t4t vibes
oh, i feel SO guilty for this one... i've actually been trying to write a post about why eiffel/hera as a cis guy/trans woman relationship resonates with me... like, the things that make hera read as trans to me are canonically things eiffel does not experience and is often kinda ignorant about. a big part of their relationship development relies on eiffel learning to decenter his own perspective and recognize that certain things will impact hera more profoundly because of who she is. eiffel reads as especially cis to me in a way that not many characters do, and part of it is... it's not that his backstory, lack of self-awareness, or various other faults could only belong to a cis guy, but those things would read very differently if they were written with any other intent. in eiffel's pop culture worldview, he conceptualizes himself as the everyman, the 'default' person, and i think there's something very intentional that's being deconstructed, with that context.
that said, though: i know how personal trans headcanons can be, and if you resonate with eiffel in that way, i think that's wonderful.
#i'm sorry!! thank you for asking. i'm just not the right person for this one unfortunately#like part of what makes hera read as trans to me is that she has to constantly be aware of all these things#re: presentation and physicality and safety and identity and navigating relationships etc.#that eiffel kinda gets to take for granted.#the lack of understanding people have for hera's circumstances that is so often. not at all malicious. but just ignorant oversight#because they don't share her experiences and never thought to consider what certain things might be like for her.#like i think. canonically a lot of the work that has to be done in their relationship. is the kind of stuff#that people are hoping to /avoid/ by being t4t#and i don't say that as a slight against eiffel or anything because obviously i love him. and in a way it's kind of an outlet for me#because i am attracted to cis men but i won't pretend there aren't like. anxieties i have about that. anyway#i will elaborate if i ever actually get around to writing that post#asks
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tip of the day: maybe don’t try to serenade someone with a shitty cover of the aviary village theme as some kind of an apology for wasting their time because it will be extremely awkward
maybe ill upload a better cover soon because theres a lot of mistakes here LMAO let me know 💀💀
#they never responded#i got over my anxiety just for this#im not going to elaborate more on this im just embarrassed#sky cotl#sky children of the light#that sky game#piano#piano cover#aviary village#if someone can give me emotional support right now IT WOULD BE APPRECIATED.#sky children fanart
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hiii jichan, long time no senseific asks from me... am kinda interested why you’ve thought the first kiss scene you wrote several says ago will have such, uh, destructive impact to the other plot points. i mean, it suddenly felt natural for them to kiss earlier than you planned them to, or 👀 (sry i’m awkward, can’t think of another way to convey that i. really appreciate your work)
(context for everyone else. my complaining was in the tags)
hi againnnnn :D well the short answer is that i'm probably being over-dramatic, but since a kiss is a big deal i gotta look over the stuff after that scene with new eyes and make sure all of it checks out with the new context
(more under the cut + general senseific updates for the curious)
it's their second kiss (so far), and i threw it in around the middle after shuffling around some plot points (the plot point shuffling is definitely going to be more, uh, destructive than the kiss is anyway, so i am just being over-dramatic), but uhhh... well it's an early release of tension and expression of yagami's frustration towards kitakata than i originally intended so... that's gonna change how their dynamic is going to feel afterwards until the tension is resolved completely (i.e. they sort their shit out)
i'd just placed those plot points in their new spots and saw a gap in the middle of my fic and was Struck By An Urge so now this kiss scene exists with only a vague idea of what the context behind it will be. ...well, i'll write it when i get to it, i suppose. but it was a lot of fun writing something exciting and new for senseific!
but now i gotta get back to the stuff i actually have to do 😔 which is mostly dance club stuff right now. i am thankfully actually making progress on that front. and later i also gotta check some stuff with the robotics club for a short part in chp 1 and 2. and just give everything a general look for cohesiveness.
chp 1 is, by my judgement, very close to its finished form (i just need to do that short robotics club part and general tweaking)
chp 2 still has quite a ways to go, but i've got big chunks of dance club where i want them now, alongside the existing kuwagami stuff (which is the other focus of that chapter). i also need robotics club stuff here but it's pretty minimal rn
chp 3 is.... well the front half has a direction (resolving the dance club), and then it gets a bit lost. (on a related note, those re-homed plot points start to get placed around here). my focus right now is to get the dance club stuff done and leave this problem to be solved later. when i move onto the robotics club, i'm hoping to see what comes up naturally. for now, i gotta focus on the immediate tasks and all that.
[tenuous separation between chapters 3/4 depending on where 3 ends naturally when i finish writing it]
chp 4 is where the new kiss scene is. and a bit of old writing of where i am generally expecting kuwagami stuff to go. around this point is where things get even further away from a readable state, so i won't go on. ....if their second kiss is in this chapter, feel free to take a guess at when their first will be. hehe.
senseific currently has a working title. chapters 1-3 have titles that i think are not gonna get changed, cause i'm attached to em (but you never know, right?)
general senseific update aside, since that kiss is around (what is currently) chp 4, i am eventually going to have to go over the older writing around that point and make sure it all matches the vibe
#jitxt#this ended up being a general senseific update because i wanted to keep talking. so excuse me#my actual answer is pretty short since i'm not really elaborating on the context of that scene for once lol#i've done a lot of casual spoiling of senseific ahahahaha#remember when i said i felt like i had all my kuwagami plot beats sorted#that wasn't untrue because i got all the big ones i want and the general direction#but my god. i wanna hit my past self on the head for feeling so satisfied when there's still SO MUCH TO DO#sorry for being unnecessarily verbose i'm just going to ignore my anxiety and press the post button before i rethink the whole post 👍
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okay hi i'm Back Here again general thoughts of my own :3
I - i think the board game is going to be a definite thing happening, possibly alongside or in lieu of a new merch drop, but i don't think it's going to be the big project. if we're going off of dan's later and a little bit after that or whatever strange thing he said, i could see this as being one of those two, alongside something bigger. i know someone said in someone's inbox (sorry horrid memory) that Relatable took on new copyrights so i think this is near definite
II - i could see how they're gearing up for a tour in the sense that we're in the d&p renaissance but i genuinely don't think they'll even start ramping up for a tour until at least next year. dan wrapped up WAD like a few months ago and we're so new into the consistent content gig that switching into the rhythm of a tour feels weird. that being said i think most likely, 2025/6 d&p tour that is (potentially) their last collab tour.
III - i think if DINOK is going to happen it's gonna be a book and i'm pretty confident on this? in which case i would actually genuinely read it; i love d&p so bear w even though this sounds like a haterism but i actually don't love their on stage scripted comedy sometimes so it would be a win for me if DINOK was a book (also think he's maybe hinted at this?)
IV - i think the odds of them doing a film/series of some kind is HIGHLY LIKELY and personally i would annihilate this i would be ripping at it with my teeth you understand me. i could see this mostly being some kind of fictional though or maybe half fictional half biopic (you know what i mean?) but i know these guys have got Creative Ideas and i think whether it's original concept they act, or them riffing off their own lives with something (kinda DINOK-esque), it'd be something they haven't really done before and would definitely qualify as like New Project
V - bonus: it takes two #2 before the end of june. i believe this. it might be the 29th it might be the 30th but i think it'll be pre-announcement, and i'm expecting announcement early july
tldr: merch + board game, then film or series; tour in 2025 or 2026
anyway! i yap more than daniel james howell sorry (i'm always saying this) but lmk thoughts if u have them!! especially about what the film/series might be because if u can't tell i'm kinda waffling lol idk what it might be
#dan and phil#dan and phil games#phan#i am really horrible at keeping up with what they mention when#so i'm going very loosely off of gifsets i've seen circling probably reblogged and have since mislocated#i've got loose elaboration on my tour idea btw. i am like severely lacking any evidence but i feel like it might be real#admittedly my main fear with a film or mini series is it becomes like ETN. If you know that acronym we must communicate btw#which i was in the trenches for to be super fucking clear (and remember the days ppl wanted them to be cast in it)#(i actually read a FIC about that like omg)#anyway i would not go to a tour and am 60-40 on if i'd watch DINOK if it's like a filmed solo project#idk if i'd get a board game. everything else Yes#to be honest anything that isn't sold as merchandise because i don't trust that company sorry#+ they never really do Non-Limited Time Merch and that is like a substantial source of anxiety in my life
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I work in customer service and I can assure you whatever is making you nervous about ordering buying anything, your cashier and anyone in the shop will not think about you for more than 4 seconds.
#I will elaborate for people with social anxiety or whatever#cause I used to be terrfified#but now I don't care at all cause I only remember three customers and it wasn't cause they were nervous/quiet/ or said the wrong thing I ca#assure you#my post#social anxiety#customer service
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