#And the shit I'm talking about is like. Yeah they don't Say The Words ''rape'' or ''eugenics'' but I think we can fucking

[trans-leek-cookie]

"villain enjoyers" doing everything in their power to ignore or dismiss the things that make the villain interesting and A Terrible Person because acknowledging a character is canonically a rapist or a eugenicist or an abuser would maybe make it Weird when they talk about how hot they are or whatever dumbass ship is going on idk

[nicoleanell]

Still on my kick of meta-ing about IWTV season 2 a few months too late. LOUMAND FIGHT TIME. I gotta be sad about something real quick.

There's definitely a thing in the Armand-apologist side of fandom (the street where I live) where it's often brought up that nothing Armand says in that argument is quite as vile and monstrous as the "groomed me into a little bitch" line. My obligatory disclaimer IN FAIRNESS TO LOUIS: (a) it's certainly not a one-sided fight and they do both get some very ugly hits in, (b) Armand was the sober one (I don't actually think that's much of an excuse but worth pointing out he immediately forgot what happened and apologized even BEFORE any mind-meddling), and (c) holy shit the rest of the episode exists and nothing that preceded Louis' suicide attempt was a justification for the way Armand reacted after it. Cool? Cool.

But still - yeah. That line is gross and extremely Not funny to me. It crosses such a huge line so fast there's almost nothing either of them could say to de-escalate from that. (In fact I'd argue it crosses a line FOR THE AUDIENCE more than it even registers as that bad to Armand, which in itself is kinda sad. Like… his instinct in that moment is laughing and throwing trauma insults back in a stupid Southern accent. He was - I cannot stress this enough - more upset by being called boring.)

I think there's something interesting about the fact that in universe the way Armand responds by mocking Louis' brother's suicide is just as horrible - because Paul's death is meant to be something that was formatively traumatic and life-changing for Louis - but I'm not sure that it fully hits the audience as viscerally terrible on the same level as making fun of Armand being raped by his daddy-vampire and others as. a. child.

But anyway, with the understanding no one came out taking the high road there... the thing that actually kills me about that exchange is we KNOW in that moment, watching them hurl these horrible horrible words at each other: these are things they opened up to each other about in the past. These are things they told each other. They've been together for decades already. This isn't a "digging into your head and pulling stuff out" kind of thing, like some fuckin' Daniel or whatever. This isn't common knowledge of their backstories just because the audience knows it already. They're both acting like "this is a thing you whine about all the time" when they've whined about it to vanishingly few people in the world, actually!!

Armand brings up Paul and Grace because Louis has talked about them, and he listened. Louis has told him about watching Paul step off the roof, about Grace at the cemetary. And Armand told Louis everything about Marius, and Louis filed that away in his brain with some extra words that Armand didn't use. At one point or another, they both unpacked the heaviest shit that ever happened to them and said "have this, I think it's why I am the way I am", they shared these things with each other in moments of intimacy and vulnerability and said "don't hurt me with this, obviously, okay?" And now they're here, unloading it all back onto each other as mockery. Yeah, I've heard you say all that stuff about your damage, and it's fucking pathetic and hilarious actually. It's not just like "I'm trying to hurt you by bringing this up", it's also "you've always sounded ridiculous to me when you talked about this stuff, you know that, right? I pretended to feel bad for you and I truly could not care less."

Like one of the reasons I think that scene is so jaw-dropping is there's so much intimacy and familiarity with each other implied and also shattered by it. And man how DO you ever get back from that. I would start the memory-erasing from that moment forward for sure.

[velvetvexations]

--- somehow i don't think the trans radfem movement thinks aphobia is a fine word to exist

It's almost quaint. Almost.

Why is there a wave of trans radfems defending 4chan boards

I'm going to need to be pointed to this if only because I'm going to get dinged for spreading malicious lies about trans women being "Nazis" otherwise, but lmfao if true.

wtf kind of hill is txttletale dying on now?

I mean she's still a tankie fuck but apparently now she's also getting in on the transmisogynistic harassment campaign game.

isn't "doll" specifically a fetish term? that is really not something people should be applying to other people without making sure it's ok first.

No, it's a Black ballroom term that trans women started running with.

People on this site are taking pissing on the poor to a whole new goddamn level “telling people that this person is/has sexually harassed someone who was a minor is calling everyone with their identity a pedophile”, I’d blame the school system but that really was a choice not to actually read and relay

it's definitely malicious

joan jett in the mv for i hate myself for loving you is like, unbearably beautiful

so true

it’s so obvious that these people choose to isolate themselves in a dimension crafted out of their own self-hatred that they care more about hurting their oppressors (and people who don’t even oppress them) than uplifting people hurt by systems of oppression. sometimes i think i’m bad but then i come across people like that and realise i’m relatively well-adjusted

inspiring innit

post addressed to trans women from a trans woman about trans women –> trfs in the notes: “why are you telling me to be nice to trans men?”

they have their priorities

absolutely wild to say that transunitists are 2010-reddit-style mras and then say things like "afab privilege." yeah those afabs with their wielding of power. and i bet they get free drinks at every bar and their bosses promote them for being pretty, huh.

they get upset at having their logic compared to MRAs because it's implicit misgendering (never mind that they directly call random trans men MRAs and radfems as well) but I'm not sure what they expect when they talk at length about how all of those fucking evil AFAB bitches are just waiting for their chance to screw you over with a false rape accusation

"pick me" is AAVE, and, like all white girls, they're overusing and misusing it until it has no meaning left 🙄

I actually wasn't aware of that. Neat. Disputed? See replies.

a lot of this going on is just reminding me once again of the intense monogenderism that really never gets worked on. It’s super awkward as a multigendered individual and an intersex one

it also just really feels so fucking tone ignorant the way people talk.

society still calls traits of men or masc, some even actively choose to agree while still being a counter to it gender but obviously real trans women don’t so attacking those things would never hurt them, and multigender trans woman who are also men? Obviously fake.

the English language is so fucking insufficient

I honestly wish every asshole who seems to think the ability to mask as complete cis and definitely just your assigned gender is a privilege had to live in my head for the holiday season. I am entirely in the closet with my family because of bigotry I have no other choice than living with my family for multiple reasons I just spent the entire winter holiday pretending to be a woman answering to my deadname being called aunty and sister and daughter and not being able to say jack shit about it without even being able to retreat to the solace of my friends afterwards because they are all busy with their own families. I want those assholes to experience the emotions and thoughts I just went through and come out the otherside and see if they still think that this is a fucking privilege.

Love you anon. <3

that anon telling on themselves so hard saying transmisogynys "far deeper" than transphobia. literally why on earth would you phrase it like that if the point was anything besides "my *special* oppression is way more poignant and meaningful than your boring regular oppression"

lmao right though it's so obviously just trying to mark their thing as having more dramatic flair

do you keep a backup of your blog with a program like tumblthree? there's a lot of valuable posts on it, and tumblr is almost distressingly transitory.

I don't, but noted.

[sunnyie-eve]

48 | Boundaries

Series: Unexpected

Paring: (Matt Sturniolo x OFC Brock!) (Chris Sturniolo x OFC Brock!)

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: mention of rape & abortion

| MASTERLIST |

Everyone was just hanging out in the living room when Colby decided to do a surprise visit. Nick was on his laptop, Chris was watching TikTok's in his phone, and Dani and Matt were watching a black mirror episodes.

All eyes went towards the front door not expecting anyone. Matt says he'll see who it was and when he saw it was Colby he mentally sighed.

"What a surprise." Matt lets him in.

"Wanted to check in on Dani." Colby says and Dani hears him so she rolls her eyes before the two join everyone.

"Colby." Dani gives him a smile.

"I wanna take you to lunch. So get ready to go. I'm not taking no for an answer." He tells her so she gets up going to her room to change bottoms.

The guys don't really chat because Dani rushed so Colby wouldn't start anything with Matt asking stupid questions.

The car ride to lunch not a single one of them said a thing and even at lunch for the first few minutes no one said anything either.

"Why did you want to take me lunch?" Dani speaks up first, "And don't lie to me because you have never done this before."

Colby chuckles nodding his head, "That is true."

"So why now? So you can interrogate me more about  my friendship with Matt?"

"I'm just curious." He tells her.

"And I keep telling you the same thing."

"And I don't believe you or him. It's; we're close friends... It's; he's attractive but we're friends. It's; we're just friends. It's; matching tattoos but means nothing." He goes on to rant.

"You never believe me. Why?" She asks wanting to know.

"Because you have lied to me in the past about things in your relationship with your ex."

"What? He was abusive and that was proven." She says more confused than ever.

"You said y'all never did anything and you did. I found papers in mom's files about your abortion."

Dani stares at him and hates that he brought that up, "I never lied because we never did it. I was raped by his older brother that just got out of jail before going back." She lowers her voice since they were in public still, "I was 15 and I only told mom about it and we took care of it. It wasn't any of yours, Gage's, or Dad's business. I went to therapy for that not just for my anxiety."

"Dani."

"We aren't talking about it anymore. And that's final. And yes, I'm your baby sister but you need to mind your own business. Especially when it comes to who I like or don't like." She tells him.

"Exactly, you're my baby sister therefore I have a right to know things. Especially when it comes to your dating life. Especially when it's maybe with a guy you met through me."

Dani rolls her eyes, "You do not have a right. And I already knew of Matt because I was friends with Nick. You only helped by letting us finally meet up. I chose to come back here after Texas not you. My choice lead to my friendship with Matt." She explains to him.

"Also I can be curious because you two barely knew each other when he asked you to move in. That's weird to me. Why would he do that?"

"Because I needed a place to go because I didn't want to go live with you again. You would do the I told you so shit!" She snaps a bit.

"Well yeah, because I told you how she was."

"Exactly my point, Colby. If I had to make that choice again not even knowing Nick the way I did... I would still take Matt's offer than live with you." She sighs.

Colby can't help but roll his eyes a bit, "You're supposed to pick family first."

Dani can't help but laugh, "Pick family first? Okay, you wanna go there... Four years ago when I came to visit you for a week. You took me to a crazy house party then left me and the party to go hook up with some girl. I had such a bad panic attack I was taken to the hospital by some strangers at the party. You had no idea I was missing until the next day was practically over with and the hospital called you instead of mom."

"How many times have I apologized for that?"

"You shouldn't have had to because it shouldn't have never happened." She tells him, "You wanna know something sad I've realized living with them? Matt knows me more than you do Colby. Those brothers know me more than my own family." She tries not to tear up, "I feel more at home with them and their parents and Justin than with my own."

Colby just states at Dani before she gets up from the table, "Where are you going?"

"Home." She wipes her tears away leaving and he follows her.

"Are you really get a ride back?"

"I am and an uber isn't too far." She gets one to go home.

"You're being ridiculous right now."

Dani spins to face him, "Me? I'm not throwing a tantrum that my sister isn't telling me if she likes her best friend or not. And say I did and I wanted a relationship with him. What are you gonna do about it?"

Before he could answer the car pulls up so she gets in it going home. As soon as she gets home she tells the boys she wants time alone and they give it to her.

"Why isn't Dani with you three?" Nick reads the twitch chat way later in the night.

"She didn't want to." Chris tells them.

"If she wanted to join us, she would." Nick adds.

"Where is she then?" Chris reads out.

"Her room." Nick tells them then reads a few telling him to go get her to join them, "I'm not making her."

"You guys flip on her so fast." Chris shakes his head, "One second you guys want her out of stuff and now you want her with us."

Dani pushes Matt's door open since she was just in the kitchen, "I heard my name." She looks at them.

"Chat." Nick tells her and sees mixed comments now about her, "Wow." He rolls his eyes at them as Dani walks into view.

She looked like she went through hell. She had been crying almost all day since she got home, "I'm not joining them because I had a bad day." She tells the chat and they could tell by her tone she was upset.

"There, she told you why." Matt says, so she could leave his room now. He knew she just wanted to be alone to cry. Hell, all three of them knew that.

"I'll lay in here for a bit." She turns crawling onto Matt's bed as him and Chris switch spots. Matt made sure to sit at an angle where Dani wasn't being shown much and Chris helps by moving a pillow to block Dani as well.

"Oh, you guys can expect a new video coming out soon on Dani's channel. With me." Chris lets viewers know.

"Because I said no." Matt spits out making Chris and Dani look at him.

"No." She tells him since that wasn't true at all.

"We had that planned. Like since we were back home." Chris tells him.

"Is there a competition going on about...who can be on her channel the most?" Matt asks the three, "Because I seem to be dead last in this with Chris in first."

Nick gives him a look, "You are so butthurt."

"That's one way to put it." Matt agrees.

"Of course, Nick." Nick says then it hits him he said his name instead as the others laugh. "At least I got Dani to laugh." Nick says proud of himself because she needed it.

[damnfandomproblems]

respond to a reply on this post: https://www.tumblr.com/damnfandomproblems/758279107941466112/fandom-problem-5461-cishet-being-used-to?source=share

"are you seriously equating making fun of a marginalized group to making fun of like, idk gender reveal parties or whatever people in your fandom make fun of cishets for doing? Like I don't mock people based on their sexuality but tell me that you do understand the difference between someone making fun of a marginalized group with a high suicide rate and someone poking fun at straight people.(Also, for the folks making racism comparisons: I'm white and when people make white people jokes about like, white people love avocado toast! White people love yoga and saying buddy! or whatever, 1) I don't mind 2) that's much different than a white person making fun of say, Black people.)"

As a poc, and specifically a queer (cisbi) native american (tlingit) who grew up around cishet white people, when it comes to online and fannish spaces I have noticed that people tend to cross the line from making harmless fun to just straight up expressing and encouraging hatred

While this is definitely a minority of people who believe and act out on these beliefs, there is a problem of people truly believing that cishet white people are all genuinely evil and inherently evil at that, and that the only way to "fix" (cleanse) the world of all problems would to be committed genocide in fandom spaces. They immediately assume the worse and dehumanize and rejected similarities they may share with cishet white people. It's absolutely prejudice and need to not only be called out, but utterly tossed in the bin

I get feeling uncomfortable or even wary of people who appart of the same kind of people who have oppressed you because you are not sure if they too have been indoctrinated into the bigotry, but we live in the modern era, more often then not you'll find that most cishet white people just don't care about poc and queer stuff

Cishet whites aren't responsible for crimes they weren't even alive for, that their ancestors committed. They are far more often ignorant because the education system is shit and has a lot racism/ableism/etc baked into foundation ontop of not really being how to do own research, then they are intentionally malicious and bigoted, and the best way to prevent them from being indoctrinated into bigotry is to just, expose them queers and poc who are chill with them and are willing to educate. Insulting them and assuming they want to hurt minorities just because they're cishet whites is the best way to push them into radical hands that will instead pain queers and poc as the ones who just want to hurt others for being cishet whites, because "obviously" why else would they immediately assume you want hurt them unless they want to hurt you?

Hating anyone for things they cannot control (race, gender, sexuality, etcetera) only breeds more hate. Yeah, don't tolerating bigots, but if genuinely can't stand a certain demographic of people ignore them rather then going out of your way to hate them. Educate if you can, or shut up when talking to people who haven't don't anything to you beyond offend your sensibly for committing the crime of being born a certain way, because otherwise you're just feeding into the genuinely malicious and bigoted peoples hands and making it easier for them to take the ignorant and make them malicious too

Hatred at the end of the day is hatred, sure, it might not be the racist or homophobic flavor of hatred, but it's still hatered. And no one should hate anyone, at least not for the things they can't control (because fuck pedos/rape-philies in general and murders and genuine racists of course, they can all go get shot, don't get me wrong and twist my words like I know some of y'all are just dying to do)

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[rey-jake-therapist]

I can't believe some ppl are actually upsetti spaghetti about the difference in treatment between brimby and galadriel and they're really reaching in their arguments about it. I guess calling out his gaslighting and lovebombing of Brimby triggered some unspoken competitiveness to prove that the only reason galadriel didn't get treated with the same degree of brutality as Brimby is because sHe'S a GuRL! And violence on a woman would instantly make Sauron lose his sex appeal. Um, wtf. Like we watched the same episodes right? They both got stabbed, only the intent behind each one was different? Sauron torturing Brimby for whereabouts of the rings vs Sauron holding himself back at first cause he was being an smug ass. Sauron lost control vs Sauron wanted to do some shady shit with that crown. He could've stabbed her multiple times without sword once she was pinned. He could've aimed that crown right at her heart, her face, her throat. I really don't understand why they think it's a contest. It's not because she's a woman, it's because Sauron's entire aim was different. (2/2)

Yeah I mean, for me these kind of people lose me the moment the person claims that Sauron wanted to kill Galadriel and Celebrimbor, because it's clear as day for anyone with a minimum of media literacy that he wanted to kill neither of them.

He killed Celebrimbor in a fist of rage because Celebrimbor hit the same sensitive spot that always makes him lose control (the image Sauron has of himself), not because he refused him the Nine. Did we see the same episode ? He wanted to torture for much longer, until he told him where were the Nine ! He threatened to extent his life, where's the murderous intent in that ?

Sauron was pissed that he killed Celebrimbor before getting the info, and he cried because deep inside he knew that Celebrimbor had told him the truth : that he was the slave of these rings, just like he was the slave of Morgoth and would always be.

As for Galadriel, clearly some people were off on some errands when Sauron showed he could just wave his hand to kill people, if they believe that he wanted to kill her. He had multiple occasions to kill her during the fight but toyed with her for a pretty long time. He could have used magic and be done with it, but stuck to the sword and the crown so they'd remain equal, even after she turned him down and pissed him off.

But tell me he wanted to kill her again.

Season 3 can't happen soon enough for people to understand that the intent was not to kill, but to possess. And I don't see where they see a treatment of favor "because she's a girl" when the subtext behind the stabbing is very clearly rape (I don't censor the word so people with a trigger can have this post muted). And I find the stabbing scene sexy because it's not a rape scene per se, but the subtext is what it is. It's definitely not "cute", and it definitely doesn't make Sauron a better guy than he is with Celebrimbor.

Talking about "queer erasure" is disingenuous, btw. One relationship was coded as a romance, the other was not, despite it being in all points an abusive relationship. Sorry that the relationship coded as romance is the m/f one, and that most people will choose to follow what the show says I guess ?

Not to mention that the majority of the audience will always be more invested in the CENTRAL RELATIONSHIP of a show, one we know will endure as long as the show does, than in a short lived one. Celebrimbor was going to die in season 2, and we knew who would kill him and what he'd do to him before, I mean... I found nothing to invest myself in, personally. All I could do was watching with a fascination mixed with disgust how Sauron was slowly but surely trapping Celebrimbor in a cycle of abuse I knew all too well. Maybe because it hit home way too hard, I admit I found nothing sexy, let alone romantic in there. Guilty as charged !

Now I'm going to block anyone who insists on making Haladriel something they're not, and/or who post these braindead takes. I'm getting less and less tolerant about what I subject myself to, especially online.

Sorry if I sound rude and a tad annoyed, I saw this at 6 am and responded accordingly to my mood 😅

[jenniferjareauwife]

Can you write about JJ’s teenage daughter being raped and then JJ finding out, but not at first. Reader almost breaks down before she tells JJ

Nothing You Can't Get Through

pairing: jennifer jareau x daughter reader

category: hurt/comfort

warnings: rape

word count: 800

age: 16

summary: you break down and tell your mom you were raped

Another night of no sleep. It had been almost every night for a month since it happened. I still hadn't told my mom, I couldn't. It wasn't that I didn't trust her it was just that I didn't know how to get the words out. I knew she knew something was wrong, the way she lingered when I was quiet and how she made my favorite meals on the days that were especially bad. She did it all the without me telling her to. There had been a handful of times where the words were on the tip of my tongue but I just didn't quite have the courage to say them.

"Y/n?" My mom knocked on my door. Why was she still awake? It was 2 in the morning. She walked into my room and sat down on the edge of my bed.

"Hi mom." I turned over so I was facing her.

"Hey baby." She put her hand on my side, rubbing it gently. "Can't sleep, huh?" I shrugged.

"You can't either?"

"I can't sleep when I know my daughter is awake and needs me, ok?" I nodded. "Can I lay here with you?" I nodded again so she laid down on her side, putting her arm around my waist.

"Mom." My voice came out as barely a whisper and I knew she couldn't hear me. My heart pounded in my chest and I prayed that her eyes weren't adjusted to the dark so she couldn't see my eyes welling up with tears.

"What's going on with you baby?" She asked quietly, wiping away a tear from my cheek. Shit, she could see.

"What?"

"You've been different this past month. Don't say it's nothing, I know somethings wrong, ok?" She reached her hand up to gently stroke my hair. "You don't have to talk about it right now if you don't want to, but I want you to talk to me."

"Mom." My voice came out choked and her eyes softened when she saw how hard it was for me to get the words out.

"You can say it baby. I'm here for you." She kissed my forehead gently, being almost painfully patient with me as I tried to stop crying.

"I'm sorry-" I cut myself off with a ginormous sob, wracking my entire body. She immediately pulled me into her arms, kissing the top of my head while holding me as tight as she could.

"Shh, don't apologize baby. It's ok, just let it all out." She rubbed my back slowly, knowing how much it helped me calm down. "I'm here for you, ok? I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here baby, I'm always here for you." I wrapped my leg over her waist, holding her closer to me. This really felt like everything I needed, to just cry to my mom while she held me. It hadn't even been a minute but I felt so much of my anxiety just melt away.

I must've been crying fifteen minutes before I said anything else. "Mom...I was raped." I could barely hear myself but I knew she heard me, the way her body tensed up slightly as she held me closer to her, like she wanted to protect me from everything.

"I'm so sorry honey." She kissed the top of my head and I hid my head in her chest, not feeling like I could say anything else about it. The words were out of my mouth, my mom knew and that was fine with me. I knew I could talk to her about it if I needed to, I could cry about it, I could scream about it, I knew she would be there to support me in any way she could.

"Mom I..."

"Yeah?"

"Can you stay here with me tonight?" She nodded.

"Of course I can honey." She stroked my hair again, cradling my head against her chest. "It's gonna be ok, you hear me? I know it seems hard right now but you're gonna get past this. It might seem like the world is crumbling around you and that's ok, it's perfectly fine to feel that way. But you're so strong, honey. You're so strong and there is absolutely nothing you can't get through." I sniffled and looked up at her through my teary eyes.

"Thanks."

"Of course honey. I'm gonna be here for you every step of the way." She rubbed my back, rolling onto her back so I could lay down on top of her. "I love you baby, you're so strong."

"I love you too mom." I sniffled and hid my face in her neck, feeling like I was finally going to be able to get some sleep now that I knew my mom had my back.

[vaspider]

Okay, so I hope I don't come off as really confrontational and I'm sorry if it does. I've started to notice an increasing number of posts on your blog that seem to be critical of things trans women do on an intra-community level. I wasn't going to say anything before, but someone you reblogged mentioned that they were starting to keep an archive of what they called "Trans radfem behavior" and that concerned me a bit.

I have -- for years -- been extremely critical of cop behavior within the community or divisive behavior within the community. I have been critical of fellow lesbians when they have gone after aces and bi people. I have been critical of fellow transmascs when they say shitty things. My most quoted, most reblogged, most 'taken and posted on other sites', most linked on Reddit (fucking apparently) post is one about divisiveness and respectability politics within the community, how those things fail us and set us up to be split up and devoured by the cishets, and a call for radical inclusiveness within the community as the only way forward.

This isn't new. I've always been like this.

I have also always been critical of the idea that identity is a shield for shitty behavior. Whether that's disabled people acting like they can't be ableist, queer people acting like they can't say homophobic shit, Jews who think they can't act in an antisemitic way, or trans people acting transphobic or saying transphobic things, this is not a new concept for me, nor one I'll move away from. It is an unfortunate thing that disabled ableists and trans radfems exist, but they do, and I've gotten tired of the idea that we have to pretend someone isn't saying shitty things because of their identity.

For a long time, one of the topics I shied away from was discussing the divisions within the trans community specifically, because -- quite frankly -- I've seen the dogpiling that tends to happen to transmascs when we criticize the shitty, bioessentialist, 'man bad woman good' behaviors of a very small but very vocal section of the online transfem community.

But shying away from talking about that is just fucking cowardice, and I've never been able to stand for cowardice within myself. So yeah, you're definitely seeing more criticism of shitty intracommunity behavior within the trans community with me. I have never been one to criticize shitty behavior restricted to identity, however, and I have surely been critical of shit behavior regardless of whether or not the person saying it is a trans man, a trans woman, or any other group of people.

You will continue to see me criticize shitty behavior, because I am absolutely fed up with the way that this community treats itself, and you will see me talk about the things that happen as they happen. Right now, there's an awful lot of shitty behavior aimed at trans men and transmascs on this site, including some from trans women. It's absolutely unconscionable to talk about raping people, or to use words like "theyfab," "cuntboy," and "zippertits" to refer to transmascs. That's what's happening, so yep, you're gonna see that on my Tumblr.

The solution here is not to be concerned about me talking about it, but to be concerned about the people doing that. Talking about shit behavior isn't the problem. The shit behavior is the problem, and it's important to both talk about the shit behavior so it fucking stops, and to talk about the shit behavior very clearly as the actions of the people who took them and not the actions of a community. It sucks that there are transfems and trans women who think it's okay to treat transmascs and trans men the way that some transmascs on here are being treated right now. Those transfem folx should know better than to pull that shit, because they know what it's like to be the target of that kind of behavior.

That said, I am absolutely not responsible for what other people say or do. I am not aware of having reblogged or endorsed the idea of starting an archive of 'trans radfem shit,' so I'm very confused as to why exactly you're talking to me about it as if I said it or endorsed it or as if it has anything to do with me, or why it would be bad to talk about the way in which trans people of any gender can fall prey to radfem manipulation. Maybe the person talking about it specified they were tracking trans women, but even the ask you sent me says 'trans radfem behavior,' so I'm assuming it would be trans people of any gender, right? If not, why are you linking those ideas together?

Like, I didn't say it, I didn't endorse it, I'm not responsible for it, but what exactly would be wrong with talking about how radfem mindsets infect our community in the first place? The manner in which too many trans people find it easy to fall into the bioessentialist thinking of radfems is a community problem.

tl;dr: I criticize everybody when they act like fools, and I'm not responsible for some random thing that 'somebody I reblogged' said.

[kokoch4n3l]

DEAD GIRL’S BEACH ࿐ྂ KUROKAWA IZANA x f!oc x SANO MANJIRO

THREE — iv bags and daffodils

"he looks at me like I'm below him. he doesn't say it nor does he act that way but his eyes say it all. patient likes loves power. he craves it" — MAYA'S ROUGH NOTES ON K.I

chapter summary: Maya faces a moral dilemma, trying to pick between her livelihood and ethics all while under the watchful eye of the hospital director and her patient, Kurokawa Izana.

chapter warnings: inaccurate depictions of psychiatric hospitals, mentions of alcohol, mentions of depression, drug use, allusions to sex, abuse of authority, power imbalance, unethical use of drugs, mentions of alcohol, mentions of rape, mentions of murder

word count: 4213

moodboard | masterlist | previous | chapter 4

Pretty is what Kurokawa Izana would use to describe Kaneko Maya. She was so pretty. Kaneko Maya was cute, funny, pretty and just Manjiro's type. Had his younger brother not been a depressed little shit right now, Izana would have gotten Ran to gift her to Manjiro. Even if he did now, Izana doubts Manjiro would even do anything. He heard that depression affects the libido. Even before he was admitted into this shitty psychiatric hospital, no matter how many hostess bars he took Manjiro to, how many hookers he called over, how many strip clubs— Manjiro was just bored. For a while, he thought the guy was probably a nervous virgin who only knew how to fight but after a drunken conversation with Sanzu Haruchiyo, Manjiro's childhood friend, he finds out that was in fact not the case. Manjiro was pretty popular with the girls when they were in middle school(due to his shoulder-length blonde hair and girls having a huge thing for pretty boys with the deep voices). Manjiro was 100%, not a virgin and just depressed as hell. "Kakucho" Izana says holding the flip phone against his ear "How's everything going?"

Friday came by pretty quickly as usual. "It's fine as usual. You'll be out on Monday. Are you excited?" Kakucho, his childhood and right-hand man asks

Izana leans back in his shitty bed and stares out the window. It's about 10:30 am, the sun is still rising. "Yeah, about time. If it wasn't for the cute little doctor that gives me company during her night shift, would've gone fuckin' crazy for real"

"That sounds unprofessional" Kakucho mutters in disappointment

Izana laughs. "It's actually not like that. Cute kid, fresh outta uni"

Kakucho laughs. It's rare to hear Kakucho laugh. "I don't believe that one-bit Izana"

"Well, you better. Kaneko Maya, real eye candy" Izana hums and stares up at the white ceiling and starts to ramble about her "talks a lot and y’know I usually hate girls that yap but she's a real cutie. Thinkin' she can fix me and shit. It’s so fuckin’ cute. She's got this little notebook she takes notes on when she talks to me. Nosey as fuck but real cute. Got these blowjob eyes—"

"She's a psychiatrist, she's supposed to be nosey," Kakucho cuts him off before he can get vulgar, simultaneously ignoring the number of times Izana used the word cute to describe his psychiatrist "What did you say her name was again?"

Izana scoffs. "You gonna do a background check on my little doctor Kakucho? This late in too? 'M leavin' Monday"

"It's my job"

Of course, it was. Kakucho was protective. Overprotective at times. It was one of the reasons Izana kept him around. To feel wanted(and because he cared about him but Izana won't say that out loud). "Kaneko Maya. How 'bout ya’ tell me what cha' find when you're done"

"Of course"

And they end the phone call not long after. Izana sits in silence for a while and sighs tiredly. He stares down his left arm with the iv in it. Apparently whatever medication was being given to him was essential to his recovery but he really fuckin' hated it. He felt like actual shit. Tired all the time, sleepy as shit. He hated it. Oh well, he was getting out this Monday anyway. He had been here for 2 months and Maya had only been working here for a month. Perhaps had she been here the whole time the first month would have been more bearable as well. He was leaving Monday anyway. Maybe if Maya was that kind of girl she'd take up the offer of coming to his beach house and maybe she'd even put Manjiro in a good mood with those cute puppy eyes she has. After all, Manjiro has always had a fixation on cute and pretty things and Izana knew him long enough to know that. Izana hears his door click and inwardly sighs in annoyance at whoever was going to enter his room. He glares at the door but his harsh gaze immediately turns into one of surprise when seeing his night shift doctor. "what are you doing here?" He asks, narrowing his eyes at Maya

Maya is wearing her blue scrubs, her white doctor's coat sleeves folded to her elbows. She's got the pager clipped to her belt, the key bracelet thing around her wrist and her ID card securely clipped to the breast pocket on her coat. "wow no hi or good morning or how are you?" Maya asks sarcastically, the door shutting with a click behind her

Her eyes are slightly red and she looks exhausted. Her hair is tied back in a bun with a few curly strands framing her face. "Hi, good morning, how are you?" Izana says sarcastically then changes immediately to a more serious and authoritative tone "You ended your shift 6 hours ago. Go home"

Maya's shift starts from 9 pm to 4 am, she brings the patients dinner because the nurses pushed the job onto her, brings the trays back and down to the kitchen, then comes back up and sticks around as there wasn't much to do unless one of the patients/criminals, needed something which wasn't often. "Yeah... But I fell asleep in the breakroom after my shift and the old man in charge of the morning told me to take his shift and went home before I could say anything" she complained and plopped down on the chair and bolted down on the floor by his bed "I complained to the director but he told me that since I was here anyway I should just take the shift and he'd paid me extra"

Izana can't help but roll his eyes. She really wanted to pay off those loans huh? "I think that's called exploitation" He says

Which is huge coming from Izana considering what he does for a living. "Yeah but... Money" she shrugs "I get to leave at lunchtime though and don't have to come back for the night shift"

"Oh gee! How great!" Izana says sarcastically once again

Izana feels a bit odd being annoyed about the fact that his doctor is being taken advantage of. He's known her for a month and he knows she's kind and these other shitty old people employed here liked to take advantage of her kindness. To make it worse she rarely complained about it. Oh well, at least he gets to see her longer and talk to her for longer. "Haven't seen those before" Izana says looking at the two necklaces she was wearing

One was a gold oval pendant with a delicate border and the outline of a flower in the center of it. The second necklace, also gold, was a small butterfly pendant. Cute. "What's the thing in the center of the coin?" He asks "A rose?"

Maya looks down at her necklace and realizes they are untucked. It was a huge safety hazard considering she could be choked. But Sunshine Grove was a shitty psychiatric hospital and none of the employees really took safety seriously(Maya neither) so they rarely removed jewelry and just kept things like necklaces tucked under their clothes. "Ah~ it's a daffodil," Maya tells him, touching the pendant "my birth flower. My birthday's in March"

Izana chuckles. How cute. "Your birth flower, hm..."

One thing Izana liked about Maya was that she tended to ramble about random things that interested her. "Oh oh have you heard that greek myth story about daffodils?" She asks

Izana would usually be annoyed at this kind of rambling but perhaps Maya had the privilege to just talk. Pretty privilege is what Ran calls it. Izana forgot what he meant since he usually tunes whatever Ran says, out but he figures maybe this is what it is. "So basically there was this guy Narcissus. He was supposedly really good-looking. But he never found anyone that could attract him. He left a long trail of distressed and broken-hearted maidens, and one or two young men fell as well" she giggles a bit then continues the story "Then, one day, he happened to see his own reflection in a pool of water and, thus, discovered the ultimate in unrequited love and fell in love with himself. Obviously, this one-way relationship went nowhere, and Narcissus, unable to draw himself away from the pool, pined away in despair until he finally died of thirst and starvation"

Izana raises a brow. "What?"

"Yeah, and he turned into a daffodil. So another name for daffodils is Narcissus" 

Izana can't help but laugh. What a stupid story. "I'm guessing this shitty story has a moral like all Greek myths"

Maya nods. "I think it was a warning not a moral. Something like ‘love and obsession lie closer together than we think’ or something" 

Oh. Time passes by when Maya rambles. She was honestly the highlight of his day or well, night. But right now it was the day so she was the highlight of his day. He figures that since she's here right now she won't be here tonight and since it was Friday he won't see her till Monday. He’ll stay a while before he leaves on Monday to say goodbye. Time passes by fast and soon comes lunch. "You know doctor, if there's one thing I'll miss about this shitty place it'll be you talking my ear off" Izana says playfully

Maya laughs. "really well—" she pauses taking in his word "what do you mean? I'm still gonna be working here y'know"

"I'm leaving Monday. Getting discharged and will be back to my normal life" He tells her with a grin "what are you gonna miss me?"

He's being playful but the expression on Maya's face makes him confused. Why is she looking at him like that. He watches her pull out the little notebook of her's and flip through the pages. Izana watches as she mutters something to herself and all he hears are little curse. "Hey, doctor... What's wrong?" He asks in confusion

Why was this her reaction? Maya gets up and walks over to where his IV bag was hung up. She looks long and hard at the bag then turns to him. She's standing right next to him. She rarely gets this close. "You're leaving on Monday?" she repeats with a frown “like discharged and going home?”

Izana is starting to get worried and a bit aggravated, not understanding why she's looking at him like that. As far as he knew she knew nothing about him or what he did. So why was she giving him that look? "Doctor. I'd like to know why you're looking at me like that" Izana says slowly

He isn't nervous. Not at all. A man like him isn't nervous. He's concerned. There's a huge difference between the two emotions. He watches Maya take a breath. "Um... Mr. Kurokawa..." She pauses and looks at him nervously "What... What are you here for? What are you admitted here for?"

That question confuses him. Why was she asking him that? Shouldn't she know? "You should know what I'm here for" He tells her lowly, narrowing her eyes at him "You're my—"

"Mr. Kurokawa" Maya says, her voice a bit breathy 

She looks scared almost and it's starting to annoy the hell out of Izana. "Cocaine addiction. Now tell me why you're making that face"

Maya looks nervous, scared and confused. So many different emotions swirl around in her eyes. "So... You're not a convicted criminal?"

He was 100% a criminal but not a convicted one. No one has caught him yet but Maya didn't need to know that. "No and why does that relate to this?"

Maya looks like she might throw up. "You're here for addiction but you're on the fourth floor and not second" She says

"Why should I be on the second floor?" He asks, his voice demanding and angry

Maya sucks in a breath. "second floor is where patients admitted for addiction stay... You're on the fourth floor where the convicted criminals who got off by claiming insanity"

Oh. Oh… Maya chews nervously at her bottom lip. She looks like she might throw up and Izana is pissed. He's fucking pissed. He watches Maya pat her pockets and she pulls out a piece of gauze and then takes his hand. He's about to ask what she's doing but then she puts the gauze pad over the insertion site as gently as she can. She starts to pull it out, increasing pressure as she smoothly withdraws the catheter. Izana stays silent and watches her stick a bandaid to the area. "keep pressure on it for a few minutes" she mumbles and grabs the IV bag

Izana puts his thumb over his wrist where the IV was inserted and watches her. She looked like she was going to be sick and it was pissing him off. What the hell? Maya is about to leave but he stops her. "Doctor... If this is what I think it is..." Izana says slowly

Maya just shakes her head and leaves his room. Izana narrows his eyes, staring at the door. He looks down at his wrist where the IV was just taken out of and was now replaced with a bandage. He stares for a moment longer then pulls out the flip-phone again and calls Kisaki. 

"What's this?" Maya threw the half-empty IV bag onto the hospital director's desk

The hospital director, Doctor Nakamura, narrows his eyes at her. "I don't appreciate you coming in without knocking Doctor Kaneko" He says lowly

Maya wasn't going to back down today. She needed answers. She may be new, she may have just graduated a few months ago but what was wrong was wrong. "Why is Mr Kurokawa on the fourth floor and not the second? He's here for cocaine addiction not for a court order" Maya was going to get her answers today "Why is he being given a sedative and that too, that high of a dose?"

She didn't care about superiority or anything. It didn't matter. Not now when a patient was clearly not being treated for what he came for. This was against the ethics of a doctor. "Doctor Kaneko..." Doctor Nakamura says, grabbing the half-empty IV bag with a dark almost crazed look in his eyes "That man... That man is evil incarnate—"

Maya rubs her temples. "Cocaine addiction does not make a man evil incarnate. You run a psychiatric hospital you can’t say things like that. Whatever it is you did, whatever it is you're doing is wrong" Maya says sternly

This was making her sick. She couldn't believe this. She knew Sunshine Grove was shitty with how they'd push all the work onto her but she didn't think it was so shitty that they'd give a patient a drug they didn't even need. This was disgusting.  "Doctor Kaneko. You don't know what he did. this is much deeper than cocaine addiction"

"He's getting out on Monday! Mr. Kurokawa has been here for 2 months" Maya argues "If he did something so bad, he wouldn't be leaving. He'd be in jail"

Doctor Nakamura doesn't look like he has the patience for this. But Maya doesn't either. What was wrong, was wrong. "Listen Miss Kaneko..." He says slowly, now looking very aggravated, no longer using her proper title "We'll have this conversation on Monday when your shift starts. How about you go home? You must be exhausted"

It wasn't a suggestion but an order. "Unless you want to start looking for another hospital that will hire you, Miss Kaneko"

Maya feels a lump rise in her throat. No. Nonononono. No. She can't lose her job. She can't. She stares at Doctor Nakamura with wide eyes. This wasn't fair. She was trying to do the right thing and— shit. She opens her mouth to say something, to try and argue, to at least give him a threat of reporting him for mistreating Kurokawa Izana but nothing comes out. Maya feels powerless. It was between her livelihood and her morals. Was this what her mother meant? Was this what she meant when she said it was hard to be a doctor? Maya thought psychiatrists were different. She thought... She thought... This wasn't fair. She clenches his fists and lowers her head. "Yes sir" she says in defeat and promptly leaves the office

Maya walks back to the lockrooms with her head down. She feels like shit. She can't believe she gave in that easily. She hates herself. She can't even get herself to go back up to Izana's room and give him an explanation. She's horrible. She's a shit person and she knows that the guilt is gonna make her sick till she throws up. Maya pulls her hair out of the bun and runs her fingers through it angrily as she walks into the locker room without paying attention to her surroundings. stupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupid— "shit!"

Maya looks up at realizes she just had her book main character moment where she bumps into the really hot guy's rock-hard chest. The guy no doubt was very hot. He's a security guard by the looks of the uniform but doesn't look like anyone she's seen on duty before. He has black hair parted in the center, olive-toned skin and heterochromatic eyes, one red and the other silver. But what really caught Maya's eye was the scar on his face. Starting from his left ear, going over the corner of his left(silver) eye then up across his forehead and disappearing into his hairline. Maya stops staring and lowers her gaze. "S-sorry" she stutters out "I wasn't watching where I was going. My bad"

He's tall and oh... Wow, he's well-built. Maya has to will herself to tear her gaze away from his chest. This guy 100% had a fricken six-pack underneath that uniform. "It's fine..." He pauses and looks at her up and down "You look tired Doctor"

Maya laughs nervously. Oh man, this guy was hot. It's almost making her forget about the guilt. Oh wait, nope she remembered it again. "Well, I'm new and you know, these oldies like pushing their work onto the newbies," She says with a shrug "I'm going home right now though... I haven't seen you around though"

The man is staring at her ID card pinned to her coat. "Hm.. Yeah, I am... I'll be taking the night shift from now on. 4th floor. They're just gonna be showing me around today"

Maya's eyes light up. New eye candy for the 4th floor now that Izana was leaving? Okay, maybe that makes her feel a little better. "Oh I work night shifts on the fourth floor too" she gives the man a friendly smile "I'm Doctor Kaneko Maya"

The man nods. Professional but also somewhat friendly. "Hitto Kakucho. I prefer just Kakucho"

Hitto? That was an odd last name. She doesn't think she's ever heard it before. But his odd last name slipped her mind pretty quickly due to the guilt she was feeling and the unholy thoughts about Kakucho that were going through her head. Oh man, he's hot and these contrasting feelings are making her head hurt. "I'll be seeing you on Monday then Doctor" Kakucho says "Get home safe"

Maya nods and Kakucho brushes past her. The locker room is once again engulfed in silence and now all that's left is Maya's guilt. She sighs and texts Chifuyu to ask him to pick her up. 

Maya sits outside in the reception area waiting for Chifuyu to come get her. She usually drives herself but last night Chifuyu insisted on driving her last night. Maya stares at the white tiled floor, sighing for the nth time. She felt like actual shit. The guilt is making her sick. Izana had been given that damn sedative for 2 months. Sometimes she'd administer it to him too. For what? For some messed up reason, she's still yet to find out. Maya feels guilty and gross and just horrible. She wants to cry. She hates this. None of this was fair. Why did it have to be her patient? Had she really just got herself caught up in something stupid all for the sake of money? Shit shit shit Maya really hated herself right now. "fuck~" she whines to herself and leans forward till her forehead touches her knees while she sits in the chair 

She feels like a stupid idiot. She should have just asked Izana what he was here for on the first day instead of trying to be nice and let him open up on his own. Now look where being nice got her. Maya flinches as her phone vibrates. She gets up and grabs her bag off the floor. It was probably Chifuyu. She bids goodbye to the man at the reception and leaves the building at the sight of a black car outside. Except it's not Chifuyu leaning against the car, it's Naoto. Her cheeks flush. Of-fucking-course Chifuyu was trying to play matchmaker. Right now wasn't a good time with how sick she felt. "hey" Naoto says with a small smile

He looks shy and had it not been for her guilt, Maya knows she'd probably be feeling the same way. "H-Hey, did Chifuyu send you?" Maya asks nervously "I'm so sorry"

Naoto shakes his head and opens the passenger seat of his car. "Oh no don't worry. Was on a break anyway. Chifuyu said he was busy and told me to come" 

Maya slides into the passenger seat and after making sure she's sitting comfortably he closes the door. Maya puts her bag on the floor of the car and puts on her seat belt. Naoto gets into the driver's side and starts the car. "I thought you had the night shift, what are you doing here so late?" He asks putting on his seatbelt

"They had a shortage... I'll be getting paid for overtime though so it's fine" Maya says trying to ignore the shitty feeling of guilt that just isn't going away

Oh man, she needed a drink. "You look exhausted. Should get some sleep when I drop you home" Naoto tells her as he pulls out of the parking lot and then out of the front gate of the hospital

"Yeah, I will.... gonna shower and just sleep and..." She pauses and thinks for a moment as they make it onto the main road "Can I ask you something?"

"You just did" Naoto points out with a small laugh and Maya can't help but laugh as well. "I'm kidding, ask away"

She thinks for a moment and tries her best to word her question. Perhaps getting an outside opinion would make her feel better. "You're a police officer, right? H-Has there ever been a time where you had to choose between your job or..." she pauses "Livelihood is a better word... Um... Has there ever been a time when you had to choose between your livelihood and your morals?"

Naoto looks surprised by her question. He keeps his eyes on the road as he answers. "W-well yeah... Have to all the time. Just last month I got called out on duty to arrest a woman for murder..." Naoto recalls then frowns "I asked her why she did it during interrogation she told me it was because the man raped her"

"Oh" Maya mumbles quietly

"You don't understand how badly I wanted to let her go. Murder is wrong but those cases... In those rare cases, even wrong can be right"

Maya takes in the information. She tries to apply it to her situation, to find just where the director was coming from but she couldn't. Kurokawa Izana didn't deserve that treatment. "But I have to say, Maya, if this is about work our situations are different... In other departments, things can be covered up by saying it was a fraud scam or corruption... In the medical department, however," He lowers his tone to "It's negligence of life... murder"

Maya's heart pounds. He was right. She didn't think of that. "Yeah... you're right" she mumbles

A silence washes over the car for a moment till Naoto speaks up again. "If there is something wrong at work, I can help you out" 

It was a nice offer but what was she supposed to say? Where was she supposed to start? Maya feels stupid because she knows she can just tell Naoto but she can't get herself to. She feels stupid and guilty and the feeling doesn't cease even as Naoto drops her off at her place. Maya's shoulder slouch as she unlocks her door. She hates this so much. A shudder passes through her suddenly at the feeling of being watched. Maya looks around for a moment and sees no one. She shakes her head and brushes it off as stress and goes into her home, locking the door behind her.

From the other side of the street, Kisaki Tetta blows out a cloud of smoke and scoffs.

notes: I do NOT condone any of the acts committed in this fic. Next chapter is gonna be my first time ever writing smut so plz, if it's bad I'm sorry 😭

I would also like to point out that I am a criminology major and don’t know much about the medical field, especially psychiatry. Everything written in this fic is not supposed to be accurate but just for the plot.

This is a double update so next chapter is already up. I have also added chapter summaries to the masterlist so go take a look!

I hope you enjoyed reading so far :)

updates are every monday

taglist: @kokonoiscoconut @mysouleaten @yaya4thawin @piroporopo @reiners-milkbiddies

[n4talia-chaparro]

"Omg 5 days without posting?! Lmao so funny."

Yeah I get it >|:/

I wanted to make this post cuz a lot of you were so "CoNcERnEd" about me and the allegations made by the anons. And well in case people wanna find "info". I kinda don't care if people wanna keep attacking me and shit but yk. I have to speak up and explain.

So I wanna start by saying that what I did last Thursday and Friday was very retarded and dumb of me and I highly apologize once again. I was not in the right mindset and it was never my intention to ignore anyone's advice. I have been mentally unstable and stressed that I couldn't focus. Yeah. I was having anger issues and a meltdown. I couldn't control them so I'm apologizing for the way I acted that time without thinking straight. It's not easy to be a CU artist because of what's happening and I admit it's not easy for me to be perfect like you guys wanted me to be. I tried everything yet you guys seem to judge and shove words in my damn throat.

About the allegations... the anons were also after one of my moots so I wanted to explain and debunk them. It's giving me a headache and overwhelming the living shit out of me.

(BTW pls I do NOT encourage harassment or any sort of threats to anyone mentioned in this post)

The grooming: this allegation is false. I'm sick of seeing them throwing the allegations around like it was some sort of volleyball-type shit. (I'm A MINOR !!! Not a adult-)

The reason why they were spreading those is because of my grooming situation I had a few years ago when I had 9-11 (and UNSUPERVISED). It all started on amino and I met my groomer. (I'm calling them M cuz yea). M and I were close friends and we used to talk. My groomer was a Krupp x Melvin shipper, a pro-shipper obviously, they would force me to do NSFW roleplay and art based on their favorite ship. (Keep this in mind I was younger at that time and I never knew how to say no to them) and they even guilt-trip me and stuff just make me feel bad and well. They would often force me to ship them too...yikes...

One day we argued and their friends decided to cause drama in the group chat. They pointed fingers at me and called me a predator. Again I was 9. I wasn't aware of what proshipping is until age 12. A lot of shit happened. I got threats, harassment, etc. And at the age of 13-14 I was groomed by someone different um yayy...:/// I was never taught about the internet safety.

And that's where the "Natty is a groomer" bullshit came from :/

I'm 16 now and to this day I keep receiving those rape threats and stuff over my past and then seeing people spreading those is dumb. The anon even went to Linavloger's blog to send a rape threat and told her I was gonna groom her. This is fucking disrespectful. Lina is Younger than me, she's fucking 13. I find it disgusting that you guys choose to tell her that. It's gross for fuck's sake. What is your problem????? For the love of God stop spreading that allegation. Not only you are making me uncomfortable but also the others who were involved. Literally, stop.

My trauma is not for you to joke with it or use it as a shield. It's gross that people are making fun of me for that. No I mean yeah. My past wasn't great because I met people who already sexualized me too many times but it doesn't mean you have to bring it up and tell everyone about it. :"(

The sexualization: The anon mentioned that I sexualized Harold in one of my videos which is again funny yet bullshit because according to them it was because of a pride month pin and small accessories..

When I say pin i meant this- 😭

Like I'm so sorry but how is this sexualizing him? It's a Pride Month pin. A PIN. How the fuck can yall be this stupid. It was an old video and you took it so seriously????? Like what???? Have you read the 12th book??? There's no way you think it's sexualization when it's Harold with an MLM pin.

This also goes to the AGERE subject. I do NOT normalize nor promote ddlg. There's a difference between ddlg/ageplay and an ACTUAL coping mechanism and I'm tired of hearing this bullshit over again like stfu so uh.

Ddlg/ageplay is where random ass adults roleplay as children and do weird shit.

Agere on the other hand is where someone reverts to a young mindset to cope with trauma, stress, severe illness, or disorders. (Mainly a safe way to cope ofc)

These are the differences between them. You cannot just tell me it's the same shit dawg. 😭

The "ripping off" thingy: another thing that I wanna address is about the au :/

The anons that I dealt with were just infini-tree fans/supporters and tree house members. Well idk. They may sound like whiney little cunts but still-- my AU does NOT have any similarity with THAT. Why would I steal ideas from someone who BLOCKED me for no reason and sent her fans after me??? No really how? How can a blocked user steal ideas if they can't see, or interact with the post (like & reblog)? Be real y'all. You may seem ridiculous if you believed those anons cuz none of them didn't pull the evidence out of their ass. 💀

"You need to apologize to her" for what? Dawg I didn't do jack shit to her in the first place LMAO yeah like--- don't get me started on that bs again. I don't wanna hear her damn name, I don't wanna know anything about her aus and shiii-- or anything related to her in my inbox or dm. I do NOT wanna have anything to do with that individual. End of the story. Not trying to be harsh, rude, or anything but like. It's annoying. I don't like to be compared to anyone or deal with the same bullshit.

Mhm yea like man. Idk what else I need to debunk but pls don't believe those anons dawg.

You can't even ask for proof cuz they don't gave any 🥰🥰💀💀💀‼️‼️‼️😭😭😭 LOL IMAGINE FABRICATING ALLEGATIONS Y'ALL ARE SO DUMB 🗣‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥

[smileydk]

The Town Weirdo

Pairing: Misfit!Wooyoung x Popular!Reader

Summary: Jung Wooyoung was a misfit. He didn't look different, he didn't dress too differently, he didn't act different, someone just decided that he didn't fit into the frame, and everyone hopped on the idea. Everyone except one, who didn’t want to judge before knowing both sides of a story.

cw/tw: bullying, harsh language, mental and physical abuse, domestic violence, fluffy, angst, mentions of rape and kidnapping

They acted as if he didn't existed. They all thought that maybe if they don't think about him, he'd disappear. He was like a bogger in the school's nose, like an eyelash in your eye. Simply there to annoy, never to do any good.

Even the adults treated him like nothing.

He was never called on in class, even if he raised his hand. He rarely ever got his tests back, grades would be shit because they didn't like him.

He hadn't done anything to be hated. He had always kept to himself, he'd always studied, he was (technically) a straight A-student, he'd never done anything to offend anyone.

He always wore an oversized, black hoodie, black, baggy cargo pants and a pair of purple air Jordans. Occasionally the hoodie would change color, but mostly he wore all black. He fit into the school's fashion perfectly.

Yet, for whatever reason, the football team decided that since everyone hated him, why not make his life fucking miserable? His life wasn't hard enough already, with everyone avioding him like the plague.

A young girl, no older than 5 years, had gone missing a few months ago. In such a small town news traveled fast. Everyone knew about her disappeareance.

At first everyone were worried, everyone looked for her. But as time passed and nothing was found, people needed someone to put the blame on. So why not choose the most hated boy in town?

Jung Wooyoung.

He had nothing to lose anyways.

''You know the girl who disappeared? He probably took her. He's probably a little pervert. He probably got her locked up in her basement and uses her whenever he feels the urge to''

Comments like these were almost normalized in the small town. Something that didn’t sit right with one girl.

She couldn't understand what he ever did to be hated, even by his own mom. She'd seen him sleeping on a bench, outside an old and abandoned restaurant.

She felt bad for him. Her own family was of high status in the town. They were rich and donated a lot of money to the small hospital, the two schools and such.

Kim Jiwoo, the youngest in the whole family, had always been rather open minded. She never liked judging people by others words. She wanted to know him, not what everyone thought about him.

She sighed as she heard her "friends" talking about the boy once more. They weren't really her friends, they simply hung out with her because of money and status, and they never had anything kind to say about anyone but themselves and Jiwoo.

''Hey, do you actually think he keeps her in his basement?'' Ara asked in an amused tone, knowing very well that Wooyoung heard her.

''Yeah, of course he does'' Hana replied in even more amused tone as she noticed that Wooyoung posture changed slightly. ''He’s a pervert. He probably keeps her in the basement, has her way with her when he wants, and he probably keeps pictures of her in his phone and rubs one out while watching it''

''I hope he falls down a well and withers away, alone in the dark'' Ara finished before they both started cackling.

Jiwoo let out a tired sigh and turned around in her seat. ''Would both of you shut up? There's no concrete evidence that Wooyoung's done shit, and how would you feel if people spread a rumour about you murdering someone? Or raping? Or kidnapping?''

Minho, the quarterback smirked. He heard the whole conversation since he literally sat next to Jiwoo. Jiwoo'd just assumed that he never listened to them.

''Challenge accepted!''

Jiwoo turned to the boy. ''A) Did you just Barney Stinson me? B) What challenge?''

''I'm gonna steal Wooyoung's phone and prove that he's a pervert!''

Jiwoo sighed. She decided, for once, to take action instead of being all talk. So she stood up, in the middle of the teacher's introduction, and walked over to Wooyung's desk.

The corner in the back.

''Can I sit here?''

The boy looked up from the desk, on which he was currently carving a face, since no one cared what he did anyways. He looked confused. Why would someone wanna sit with him?

He mumbled a quiet ''sure'' and put away the knife and sat up straight.

He knew carrying a knife around and carving shit into the furniture didn't exactly support his attempt on proving himself innocent, but after a while he stopped caring about what everyone thought about him.

''Do you wanna hang out after school?'' Jiwoo asked, still that gorgeous, model smile on her lips.

Wooyoung felt a bit ashamed as he stared at her lips. He wondered what they’d feel like. What they’d taste like.

''Why would you wanna hang out with me?'' He asked and turned his attention back to his little carving.

Jiwoo shrugged. She didn’t know why. She was simply a social butterfly. And he intrigued her.

''I like being social. You intrigue me for some reason, and you’re the only person in the school who doesn’t kiss my ass for status and money ''

''Well, sorry little miss daddy's Princess, but that ain’t gonna happen, ever''

The girl realized how it sounded. ''No! I didn’t mean it like that. I like that you don’t do it. To be honest, I don’t really have any real friends''

Wooyoung let out a sarcastic laugh. ''Oh yeah? Couldn’t daddy’s money buy you some?''

That was it for Jiwoo. Here she was, being as nice as humanly possible when you don’t know someone, especially when there’s a rumor that he’d murdered someone and another one stating that he’d kidnapped and raped a five year old girl.

She always tried to keep the judgement low, or non-existent. But anyone would be kind of concerned with a murder rumour. She thought she was doing a great job at being nice, yet he treated her like a piece of shit.

''Listen here you fucking asshole, I came over here to try and be nice. I wanted to prove to the town that you’re not some weirdo, kidnapping rapist, but apparently you hate everyone, and I can’t judge you, but I have never done shit to you. In fact, when we were in 4th grade, I beat up Dae for bullying you, but fuck you''

Jiwoo started packing up her stuff to go back to her other desk. They both knew all eyes were on them since Jiwoo’s outburst wasn’t the most silent person in the universe.

Wooyoung cursed himself for being such an asshole. It was a habit at this point. If someone tried being nice, his defense mechanism would turn on. He just assumed no one ever wished him well.

He grabbed her arm. ''Look, I’m sorry. You’re right. It’s just… with everyone being nice to me, and then shoving me down a well or similar, it’s hard accepting when someone’s being genuine''

Yes, it had actually happened. Wooyoung was seven and his "best friend" had asked him to come to his house and hang out. He did, and his "best friend" shoved him into a well. In which he had to lay in for three hours, crying his eyes out.

The girl smiled. She could accept that as an apology. And it seemed quite logical what he said. Survival instincts.

She sat back down and smiled. ''So, do you wanna hang out? My dad’s pulling out his ugly old barbecue. When he cooks, there’s enough to feed the whole town. I promise, if they do anything that makes you uncomfortable, you can leave ''

The boy thought about it. ''Sure, uhm, but I gotta do one thing before we go to yours''

Whispers followed his reply. People were sure that Jiwoo pranked him, that she only asked him out of pity, or because she had a bigger plan. All were wrong. She genuinly wanted to get to know the man.

The boy intrigued her, so she acted on it. And to be fair, he was ridiculously good-looking under the black hood.

As the class went on, Jiwoo couldn't be more bored. ''Does anyone know the answer to question 10?'' The teacher looked at the class.

Wooyoung raised his hand, something Jiwoo'd seen him do a lot, but he never got to answer since the teachers seemed to hate him just as much as the students.

''No one?'' The teacher asked, his gaze avoiding Wooyung's corner.

''1939'' Wooyoung said out loud, tired of being ignored.

''Don't speak unless I tell you to!'' The teacher snapped in a rude tone.

Wooyoung rolled his eyes and sunk back down in his seat. ''Asshole'' He mumbled under his breath, causing Jiwoo to chuckle.

While Wooyoung packed up his stuff Minho passed by their desk. It confused them both since he sat in the front.

Without missing a beat Minho snatched Wooyoung's phone from the table and rushed out of the classroom. Jiwoo cursed the fact that Minho was the quarterback. He literally got the position because he could run.

Wooyoung let out a quiet sigh and slung his bag over his shoulder. Jiwoo copied his actions. ''Let's get your phone back, eh?''

''Uhm, I can survive without it''

''Wuss, I'll do it. Let's go''

They headed out of the classroom and spotted everyone in the hallway, gathered around the tall quarterback.

Jiwoo let out a quiet sigh. She walked up to Minho, after pushing her way through the small crowd. She tapped him harshly on the shoulder. When he turned around Jiwoo quickly withdrew her arm and punched the boy in the face as hard as she could.

A small crunch was heard and Wooyoung's phone dropped, right into Jiwoo's expecting hands.

''Don't take things that aren't yours'' Jiwoo smiled sweelty and threw Wooyoung his phone.

Wooyoung pointed behind her. Jiwoo turned around and spotted the quarterback charging at her. ''Why does he have to make things so difficult? Hold this, love'' She handed Wooyoung her bag.

Wooyoung froze for a short moment. Jiwoo called him "Love".

Minho stopped before her and stared down at her. ''Listen here Kim-''

''No, you listen her Park, you've been an asshole since the day I met you. You've never been nice to anyone but your minions, you've never treated Wooyoung as a person. My parents basically run this town, my dad's a lawyer, my mom's... important, let's see who wins?''

Minho fell silent and stared at the very short, yet fiesty girl. ''Well... fuck off''

''Now to the rest of you assholes, did you find a single picture of anything? Any proof? Anything?''

No one said anything.

''That's what I thought!''

''He had a picture of you!''

Jiwoo slowly turned around and looked at Wooyoung. He looked horrified. ''Can I see?''

Wooyoung unlocked his phone and handed it over to Jiwoo. She scrolled through his cameraroll and found two pictures of her. One in the dining hall where she sat alone, side profile towards him as the sun came through thw window, and one of her lauhging about... whatever.

''I look amazing- wow'' Jiwoo mumbled and zoomed in on herself. ''Be gone, idiots! I see no harm in these'' She handed the phone back to the owner. ''Let's head to mine then, loverboy''

''Jiwoo! You coming?'' Ara and Hana asked and turned to their friend. They were planning to hang out earlier, but she wasn't too excited about that anymore.

''No, I'm gonna hang out with Wooyoung'' The girl replied without even looking at her two friends.

The two girls scoffed and looked at the boy. ''Why? He's a kidnappeing pervert''

''So? Do any of you have any proof, whatsoever, of anything? I'm heading out with him, bye''

Wooyoung followed Jiwoo out to her car. His eyes widened. ''Holy fuck, that's a nice car''

A chuckle left the girl's lips. The laugh sounded like heaven to Wooyuong's ears. ''Well, get in. Where did you need to go?''

Wooyoung snapped out of his daydreaming and looked at the girl. ''Oh, uhm, just outside town. I do some charity work at a orphanage there''

Jiwoo smiled. ''You're such sweetheart''

The boy blushed. ''Well, I know how it is living without parents so.... yeah''

She smiled and started the car. Jiwoo drove and Wooyoung gave directions to the building.

When they stopped outside the daycare and Wooyoung got out, he was immediately ambushed by kids. He squatted down and held out his arms as the kids hugged him.

Jiwoo smiled as he spoke with each of them, asking about their day. ''Oppa, who's she? Is she your girlfriend?'' One of the small girls asked with a smirk.

Wooyoung turned around and looked at Jiwoo. ''No, she's a friend. Be nice to her''

A few of the kids immediately walked up to her and started introducing themselves with wide smiles. One girl in particular had a tight grip on Wooyoung's pant leg. She seemed very shy.

Jiwoo walked up her and squatted down in front of her. ''Hello, I'm Jiwoo. What's your name?''

She hid behind Wooyoung's tall frame. ''Uhm... Arin''

''Pretty name, fits perfectly for such a pretty girl'' Jiwoo said and smiled as sweetly as she possibly could.

Arin seemed to accept it and smiled. ''You're sp pretty, Unnie. Are you Oppa's girlfriend?''

''Just a friend I'm afraid''

The small toddler pouted. ''But you're so pretty!''

Jiwoo chuckled as she leaned closer to her. ''Can you keep a super secret secret?'' The girl nodded excitedly. ''Oppa is really handsome, but you can't tell him''

''I promise!'' She giggled and ran away.

The girl stood up straight and looked at Wooyoung, who was frozen in his spot.

Kim Jiwoo, the perfect dream girl, thought he was handsome? The town's misfit, the weirdo creep?

''You there Wooyoung?'' Jiwoo waved her hand in front of his face.

''Hm? Yeah''

''Ah! Wooyoung, right? Welcome!'' Chaeyoung greeted the boy happily as Jiwoo introduced them.

Wooyoung's eyes widened as she squeezed him in a tight hug. He looked at Jiwoo with a panicked look. No one had ever shown him this much love.

''Yah, eomma, you can't just hug people I bring home. Not everyone's comfortable with that!''

The woman immediately pulled away from the hug. ''I'm so sorry Wooyoung, it's just... Jiwoo's girlfriends are all... rude, and you seem to sweet''

The boy was still surprised, as well as confused. ''So you've not heard the rumours?''

''Yeah, well, I prefer creating my own opinion'' The woman smiled sweetly. ''Food will be on the table in a minute, unless your father screws it up again''

Jiwoo chuckled and led Wooyoung up to her room. Wooyoung only stood awkwardly in the door opening, as the only time he'd ever been at someone else's house was with an old "friend" who didn't allow him on the furniture, as if he was a dog.

''Sit wherever'' Jiwoo threw her school bag into her closet and closed it. She sat down on her bed, removed her shoes, and crossed her legs.

Wooyoung carefully sat down in her office chair. He wasn't sure what to do.

''So, tell me about you. I wanna get to know you! I doubt you're a kidnapper since you volunteer at the orphanage''

The boy chuckled. ''Well, uhm, there's not much to know about me. I'm homeless since my own mother hated that everyone knew her son, especially for something bad. I volunteered at the orphanage before that. Uhm, then the girl went missing and since everyone already hated me it was easy to put the blame on me. And yeah, the rest you know''

''You can stay here if you want. We have a spare bedroom'' Jiwoo offered with that same, sweet smile she always wore when she spoke to him.

Wooyoung didn't know what to think about it. He adored it. It made the girl even more beautiful, if that was even possible, but he also felt like she only acted like this out of pity.

''Look, if you're only doing this for some kind of Univeristy resume, or pity, or some kind of... attention from the whole town, just drop the act now and I'll never bother you again''

Wooyoung was ready for her to either lash out on him for "exposing" her, or laugh and throw him out, or continue her lie, but she didn't.

''I know you think I'm doing this out of pity. I know you only see me as some... rich daddy's girl, but I genuinly want to help you, and I really think you are sweet, if you want to at least. Carving faces into the wall works against you, but yeah''

The boy was stunned.

''And I didn't lie before, you are really handsome'' Jiwoo winked and smirked.

''Thanks'' He blushed slightly and pulled up his hood again.

Jiwoo chukled. ''You're a blushy one'' She teased and took out her phone. ''Give me your number''

Wooyoung was hesitant but did as requested. ''Why?''

''Kids! Food!''

''So we can hang out again'' Jiwoo said in a duh-tone.

Wooyoung made a quiet "ah" sound and quickly entered his number into her, much newer, phone. Jiwoo took Wooyoung's phone and did the same to his. She held it up and took a silly selfie before handing it back.

''Smile'' Jiwoo smiled and directed her phone camera to Wooyoung's face. The man did as requested and smiled. ''Pretty, now let's go eat''

''So, Jung Wooyoung, correct?'' Jiwoo's father, Changkyun, turned to the new face.

''Yes, sir''

Changkyun smiled. ''He called me Sir, I like this one!''

Jiwoo chuckled as she ate. Her father loved meeting new people. Especially if they looked up to him. He enjoyed the ego-boost.

''Well, how come you two are hanging ouy? Jiwoo only has mean friends, but you seem really sweet'' Changkyun asked bluntly.

Wooyoung let out an awkward laugh. ''Well, Sir, she sat with me in math. Why I have no idea''

''Because he was intriguing, and my friends are all assholes, might as well make some new ones. And he's the only one in school I haven't spoken to before''

Chaeyoung chuckled to herself. She enjoyed Wooyoung's company, and her daughter seemed to enjoy it as well.

''So, any girls, Wooyoung?'' Chaeyoung asked.

''Eomma!'' Jiwoo glared at her mother.

''Uhm, no ma'am, afraid all the girls in school hates me or are terrified of me, well, except Jiwoo apparently'' Wooyoung smiled sweetly.

Jiwoo looked at the boy with a sweet smile. Well, according to her mother it was "adoring". Chaeyoung was convinced her daughter had found her "one".

Jiwoo and Wooyoung finished their dinner and were quick to disappeared up to her room again.

Wooyoung cursed himself as he caught himself staring at Jiwoo's lips once more.

''Fuck her lips are pretty- even prettier when she smiles''

''I can see you staring'' Jiwoo chuckled and smiled. ''You got lip-fetisch, or what?''

''N-n-no! I just- your- I- your lips are pretty''

Jiwoo chuckled and sat down in front of him. ''Oh yeah? They're pretty?''

Wooyoung didn't know what to do. He was panicking on the inside while also keeping all his focus on Jiwoo's lips. She was so close. He could smell her sweet scent. He could see the glitter specks in her pink, cherry lipgloss.

''Wanna feel them? Or taste them?'' Jiwoo knew she was frisky. But she thought she'd picked up some... hint. A small, subtle nod. Jiwoo smiled again, that sweet, gorgeous smile. That smile Wooyuong had never seen, before she looked at him.

Her smile made him feel like the only person in the entire the world. Her smile made him feel like every problem he'd ever had had disappeared. Her smile made him lose his mind and not focus on anything but her.

Jiwoo chuckled and laid a hand on Wooyoung's shoulder. ''You sure? You don't have to kiss me unless you really want to''

''I- I-... I really want to kiss you, I'm just worried that you'll be let down by me doing... being, well, me''

''Come on, my first was Minho in our class, it's hard to let me down'' She laid a hand on Wooyoung's cheek. ''And who knows, maybe I'll let you down?''

''You could probably never let me down'' Wooyoung smiled weakly.

Jiwoo smiled and laid her small hand on his cheek. She leaned closer, slowly if Wooyoung wanted to back out. He didn't. Jiwoo pressed her lips against Wooyoung's.

Wooyoung might be new to this whole thing, altough he had his fair share of kisses, but he carefully wrapped his arms around Jiwoo's waist and pulled her into his lap.

A small smile rose to the girl's lips as she straddled him. She wrapped her arms around Wooyoung's broad shoulders and pulled him closer.

The man was touch-deprived, and slightly desperate. His hands landed on her hips and his thumbs automatically started rubbing circles on them.

Jiwoo parted her lips slightly, allowing Wooyoung to do as he pleased. Wooyoung accepted the invite and started exploring her mouth with his tongue.

A small, breathy moan left Jiwoo's lips. She was also, slightly, touch-deprived.

She pulled away and chuckled slightly. ''Someone's excited''

Wooyoung blushed and rested his forehead against Jiwoo's shoulder. ''You're mean''

''Yet here you are, without your pent up walls''

''For you only''

[haveateadude]

i want to talk about this because it's pissing me off. i don't even care if someone reads this whole thing i just need to get it off my chest.

i'm not from the united states so i can't imagine how y'all must be feeling, knowing now the place will never find peace (what is even that word right now?). my dad has been watching a lot of trump videos and my mother has said to me she's okay with trump winning and her only argument was that the us actions are increasing and that he doesn't allow abortion. i didn't say anything, knowing that my family isn't really open about this stuff, so i've kept a lot of anger inside of me. my father doesn't even like when i watch movies about feminism. but like, even if i didn't watch things about feminism i think i'm pretty aware of what my rights are as a woman

i know it's not my place to be upset, but i am. i am because i've had my own experiences with people crossing my boundaries. i've had a doctor touching my hips and using his job as an excuse, i've had a boy come too close to my face just for his friends to take picture and then telling his friends that he has to go dance with another girl like i'm some kind of object in someone's checklist, i've had men coming too close to me on the train, men staring, men being misogynistic fucks and i'm young. i think that's the worst part. i'm too young and my mother has told me about rape since i was nine. i have so many stories more that i don't even want to talk about and i can't imagine what would've happened if the situation had gone to another level.

so yeah, sorry for being angry, i just hate the fact that men have been weird towards me since the ripe age of six and one of those kinds of man is a fucking president. and i could talk about abortion, too. who the fuck are men to think that they can control women's bodies? who gave them those rights? it's our body. if we want to do something to it it's OUR responsibility, not theirs. "but you're killing a human being"—to everyone who has ever said this, have you ever heard of suicide? do you know how many people have killed themselves because they knew they couldn't provide for their baby and they felt that there was no way out?

and what about the mass deportation?? i get that some people think that immigrants are criminals but it's truly not all of them. people go to the us to get jobs and they provide for the country. i can't imagine what it's like to people losing their close ones because of this—the fear people are feeling right now must be horrible—this is fucking cruel.

it's crazy how some people think that a man like trump is in the right mind to be a president. that shit face is a rapist and racist and homophobic (what's so wrong about loving?) and he doesn't care about ANYONE but himself. even people close to him have said this. we as people have no empathy anymore, so please. be better. do better. be kind and take care of others instead of only focusing on what's best for you.

[princesspastel8]

Chapter 65

Third POV

Police sirens can be heard, getting closer and closer to the home. The three go back to Eboni's room and climb down the window. Just as they were about to book it into the forest, a sound of a gun clocking. The three turn around, Eboni forced behind Jeff.

"Years, I waited. Fucking waited for this moment."

Eboni peeks around Jeff, sighing heavily. "....Michael? Really? How did you -"

"No one believed a word I said! I knew it was you that killed them, but I know you had help - and motive. Then we came across that kid you claimed raped you. Maaaaaaan, that was something gruesome! Smith still wouldn't listen to me! So I rain off, trusted my gut - now here we are!"

"Damn... you talk too much." BEN grumbles, rolling his eyes.

Jeff claps sarcastically, grinning. "Well, good job, dectivite! I bet this shit is feeding your ego juuuuust right - huh?" The smiling killer mocks.

"Yeah, keep smiling. I'm gonna have the last laugh! And you..." Michael trails off, glaring daggers at Eboni. "I knew you had a few screws loose. A crazy bitch like you should've been locked away in a mental institution ages ago!"

That is enough to make Jeff frown. He steps forward, making the male place a finger over his trigger. "I don't give a shit what you say about me, but you better watch your fucking mouth when it comes to what's mine."

Michael raises a brow, tilting his head. "Well, this just keeps getting better, huh!? I'll get to take away someone you care about - just like how you did me!"

Jeff stares at the male for a moment, huffing. "Gonna have to be more specific here. I have a lot of victims." He chuckles.

At this point, Micheal's face becomes red with anger. "You... YOU KILLED MY BROTHERS!"

Jeff picks at his ear, looking at BEN - the demon shrugging, not having a clue who this guy is still. "Ok? What makes you so fucking special?"

"Does the name Justin ring any bells?" Micheal questions, enjoying Jeff's reaction. "Yeah... yeah, the one you claimed bullied you alongside Spencer! You killed them... Then, after you escaped that psych ward, you killed my parents! YOU TOOK MY FAMILY AWAY FROM ME!"

"No...no I gave them peace. But Justin?" Jeff begins to laugh, eyes now bloodshot with rage. "He played a part in making me. Freeing me even! Why are you playing dumb? Trying to seek revenge for the guilt you feel? You wish you were with them that day? To save them or to die with them? Doesn't matter to me - you'd just be another victim."

Just as Jeff said that, police cars surround them. BEN curses under his breath. He's not supposed to be seen in the public, let alone known. Sure, many know of his existence and back, sorry- but there's never been any evidence to make up many claims. If any of these cops have dash cams, then it can lead to a serious problem with slenderman.

"And you'll just be another inmate on death row!"

Eboni quickly pulls out her gun, annoyed with Michael's threats. There's no way she's losing the freedom she finally gained thanks to Jeff. Just as Eboni aims her gun, a shot rings through the air. She cries out, dropping her gun and holding her shoulder in pain.

Jeff's eyes seem to bug out of his head. The two locks eyes, Eboni's drowning in pain & fear. This isn't how their Christmas is supposed to go. They're supposed to be back at the slender mansion by now. So Jeff looks at BEN for help, but he's let down and also taken aback. Michael has the watering holes, spraying the demon with water.

Michael laughs mockingly. "Not so tuff now, huh? You thought I didn't do enough research? Myth or not, I wasn't taking any chances."

Jeff lost sight of reason and raises his fist to try and punch Micheal, but Mr. Smith shoots Jeff in both of his legs. The killer stumbles but refuses to fall, so Smith & three other officers jump on him, keeping Jeff pinned to the ground and hand cuffs them.

"Jeff!- get the fuck off me!" Eboni shouts, trying to shake the two cops holding her down.

The two share a look of distress. Slenderman should know what's happening. He should be here by now, their back in his jurisdiction. There's no way he's decided to disregard them due to them leaving his bubble of protection? But Eboni's his next project. He can't be this far ahead to see that Eboni will only listen to Jeff - right?

No matter. Jeff will figure something out. He always does - he has to. He can't look defeated in front of her. She's watching his every move, every reaction. Any slight change in his face will make her piece together, his thoughts racing in panic. So what does Jeff do?

He gives her his signature smile.

"Smile princess." He instructs, earning his face to be shoved into the ground.

"Get off of him! Don't do that - Jeff!"

Jeff forces his face up despite the strength of the officer trying to force it back down. "I said smile, princess!" He laughs loudly, snickering in between.

Eboni watches, tears filling her eyes. But she smiles. This time, this short time spent free with Jeff has been the best moment of her life - the best day of her entire existence. Eboni is devoted to Jeff, so no matter what's to come- she will keep her loyalty to him. Nothing can sway her, but if... someone - something can -

"You have the right to remain silent! Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of......la- bah!"

Suddenly, all the weight holding the two lovebirds are lifted, followed by the sound of fearful screams and loud gunfire. Jeff stays on the ground due to the flying bullets but crawls over to Eboni. He places half of his weight on top of her to shield her, raising his head to asset what's happening.

His eyes widen at the sight. A being standing ten feet tall, grey gasly skin, glowing red eyes, black horns that seem to glow based on the ceatures mood, razor sharp teeth, pony ears, and sharp claws- reaching six inches. This being is also dressed in a suit similar to Slenderman's, but a few buttons are undone, and his tie is low but still together.

The creature continues its bloodbath, ripping through the officers like pieces of raw meat. It truly is a sight to see. Though, the huge question is lingering within Jeff's mind. Just what the hell is Zalgo doing here? The demon king turns to Micheal, licking the blood off his claws with its long slippery tongue - stretching six inches.

"You humans all have different flavors. All based on your final rush of emotions. Fear, anguish, desperation - but the one I favor the most is rage. The hot, steamy taste of rageful blood has a nice spicy tang to it, don't you think?"

Michael is trembling, having witnessed his colleagues being torn to shreds - but he won't show fear, at least on his face. He aims his gun at Zalgo, emptying the clip. A laugh leaves the beast, one low yet mixed with different pitches & voices. The demon king stretches his arm, his claws digging deep into Michael's stomach.

The male cries out as he lifts from the ground, blood pouring out of his mouth. The creature brings him itches from his face, his tongue licking down his cheek to his throat.

"Such fire, Michael. Hope you taste just as good!"

Zalgo would then bite the male's head off, swallowing it whole. He drops the corpse, licking his claws clean. The demon king then turns his attention to BEN, laughing at his pitiful state.

"I question why you went to Slenderman instead of living with your own kind, BEN." Zalgo sighs, using fire from the palm of his hand to dry the water quickly.

When dried enough, BEN quickly glitches away, helping Jeff & Eboni off the ground. She stares at the being, not having a clue who nor what it may be. She whimpers, clenching her shoulder. The bullet lodged in her shoulder. Zalgo moves to step forward, but Jeff is quick to pull out his knife and shield his girl.

"Step the fuck back.", the smiling killer warns.

"Or what? Gonna attack me with your wittle bitty knife? Oh goodness, I'm terrified!" Zalgo mocks, laughing.

Jeff grinds his teeth together, about to lung forward, but Zalgo holds his hands up in mock surrender. "Relax, kid! Jeez, I'm not here for you. I'm here for the girl."

Eboni's eyes widen, trying to look over Jeff. "Me? What hell you want with me? What even are you? Who are you?"

"Soooooooooo many questions, but fine - I'll humor you. I'm Zalgo! The demon king, or Lord. Either is fine - you may have heard the saying 'He comes. He who hides behind the walls.' " He grins.

"Hold on...as in -"

"Yes, yes. My two useless daughters. I am aware that you are acquainted with them. In fact, that's when I took an odd interest in you." He hums, tilting his head.

The demon king notices how still reluctantly the three are to speak, so he sighs heavily. "Perhaps I should present myself in a more friendly form."

Zalgo begins to shapeshift. His height lowers to six five, grayish gasly skin now a pale yet tanned shade. One eye is a normal oval green while the other is inky black with red irises. His nails are painted black, hair a burgundy red, markings on his throat that resemble a choker, rings littering his fingers, and piercings in his ears. He's still dressed in a suit, though this time a vest instead of a suit jacket. Eboni has to admit that he does look fairly attractive for a psychotic demon king.

"Now. Let's talk."

"What the fuck do you want with my girl?", Jeff questions with clenched teeth.

"As stated before, I'm interested in her. Not in the way you're thinking, lover boy. Still surprised you let a mere thing make her make you all soft."

"Zalgo, I'm not in the mood for your shit! Get to talking or -"

"You used to be all for shits and giggles. Jeez, you literally have a smile on your fa-"

"I didn't do that shit myself, and you know it!"

"Struck a nerve, I guess."

Eboni rubs her hand up and down Jeff's back, hoping to calm him. She turns her attention back to the demon king. "I'm nothing special, at least not to someone with high power."

"Oh, but you are, child! Slenderman has been dying to get his hands on you. God, could you just imagine the look on his face when I take you right from under him!?"

"He can't - He's faceless, dipshit."

Zalgo raises a brow, placing a hand on his chin and tilting his head. "My my...you are feisty. Just like your mo-"

"Get on with it, Zalgo. We're all exhausted after today!" BEN snaps quickly, confusing the two.

The demon lord puts two and two together, bursting into a fit of laughter. "Alright, alright. It's not my place to say anyway, but it will be if you accept what I have to offer."

"Which is?" Eboni questions, Jeff giving her a look of warning, but she shrugs it off - doubting she'll even ponder on it.

"Work under me. You know the jest- kill, collect souls - blah blah blah. You get a place to stay, anything you want I'd give you."

"What's the catch?"

"A catch? Oh kid, there isn't one! All I want are souls."

"Don't shit me. I'm not some stupid bitch. What is it that you want from me in return? When deals sound to good to be true, there's always a catch - hidden within the fine print or in your words."

"Oooooooooooo! You're a smart one! Fine, fine! It's nothing too big - nothing major. All I want is your soul."

"What!?" Jeff shouts, now fuming again. "Fuck no! She's mine! She only answers to me! Eboni belongs to me!"

Zalgo laughs, shaking his head. "Cute declaration!" He snaps his fingers, Jeff's lips disappear. "But I don't think I asked for your opinion."

"Jeff!" Eboni shouts, trying to keep him from lunging at Zalgo and scratching at his face. Thankfully, BEN steps in and holds Jeff down, using his powers as best he can to keep him at bay.

"I'll allow you to still see your boy toy or whatever he is to you - hehe, look at him squirming on the ground like a worm - anyways!" He holds out his hand, a contract and a feather pin floating in front of Eboni. "Just sign on the dotted line, and all will be w-"

"No."

"No?"

Zalgo is quick to transform back, towering over her but lowering his face down to be itches from hers. "NO!?"

Eboni gags, covering her mouth and taking a step back. To say Zalgo is surprised that the girl didn't even flinch is an understatement. After everything Eboni has gone through , a Demon king is the least frightening thing she's had to face. Despite what this being is capable of, the girl encountered plenty of monsters to know how to deal with frightening situations.

"Yeah, no. My da... Jeff is right. I only answer to him. My entire being belongs to him. And since he doesn't work under you, then I can't either. I go where Jeff goes. He leads. I follow."

Hearing this, Jeff's temper fizzles down. BEN let's him go, and Jeff springs to his feet, taking Eboni into his arms. He glares daggers at Zalgo, backing away quickly. The demon king watches on, his eye twitching but smile stretching.

"No one... has ever said no to me, except one." He laughs wickedly, eyeing BEN who hangs his head low in shame - something the two didn't notice.

Zalgo buttons up his shirt and fixes his tie, eyeing Eboni as he did so. "And that one unfortunately paid with her life. You're just as smart as her, as witty and even more beautiful. Shame, such a shame!"

The creature begins walking off, pausing mid-step, turning around to look Eboni dead in her eyes - the look chilling her, yet she still feels no fear.

"Such a shame you'll succumb to the same fate as your mother.", and with that, Zalgo disappears into the night.

[velvetvexations]

you know i said this about ace discourse when it was happening too but it's blatantly obvious how much of a lie it is that most of the nastiest people spreading bullshit around genuinely think transmasc people are an "oppressor class" because like. the way they state things in their posts makes it pretty clear they're clearly not making jokes at the expense of people who have hurt them, they're making jokes at the expense of people they think are annoying (which isn't the same thing but you wouldn't know it based on the way some people on this website act). like, if you're picking on people for the way they look or talk or the names they have and making stupid ass posts like "the pokemon sneasel looks like a theyfab" and directly harassing people out in the open you pretty clearly don't genuinely think these are people that can hurt you, because you feel pretty damn safe acting like a high school bully towards them

(I'm putting this in the tag because I feel like anon has really struck gold here)

It is, now that you mention it, very different from how cis men are discussed. Normally in a lot of feminist spaces, cis men are treated like The Enemy, but often in a sober way that treats living under the patriarchy in 21st century as though they were living through the London Blitz, and when they are made fun of it's like eighties stand-up comedian shit that men are half as likely to make about themselves.

Transmascs are like, treated with so much extra venomous malice in a way that goes for the throat like cis men never get. Because how, really, does a woman hurt a sexist and powerful cis man's feelings? It's pretty much pointless. It's like telling the emperor he has no clothes and he just goes "yeah and check out how huge my nuts are". The meanness with which transandrophobes try really hard to pick at transmasc insecurities, like regarding SRS anatomy and forced impregnation (which hello is literally just joking about rape?????), is sickening.

But they'd say it was bad to joke about a trans woman's vagina because that's transmisogyny. At best they'll say it's also wrong to say those things to transmascs, but is still somehow just redirected transmisogyny in spite of the fact that it's often transfems doing it and concerning things that are like...I don't want to say "exclusive to transmascs" because I'm still trying to get things straight in my head about how to word things in a way that's inclusive of intersex and non-binary people, but you get what I mean, right? It is extremely targeted and not at all redirected transmisogyny or "just transphobia" like transandrophobes would have you believe.

[janiedean]

thoughts on the people who blame Jaime for what happened with tysha and say that he was a kingsguard adult and he allowed tysha to be raped that he was an accomplice ( well we were never told if he knew what was going to happen ) and tywin showed a level of control over his kids ( remember how cersei asked tywin for leave when as Tyrion put it he should be asking her for leave since shes the queen

(answering this and the other two you sent now sorry for the lateness but as said I'm really out of spoons these days)

I think I went in depth on the specific matter on the novels of jaime meta I wrote so I'm gonna be extremely concise for my standards but

people who blame Jaime for what happened with tysha > well we established literacy is dead and if you blame jaime for a thing tywin did then congrats on showing you skipped english class in elementary school

he was a kingsguard adult > ah yeah the guy who got into the kg at 15 and ended up killing his king at 17 and got vietnam war level ptsd in three years plus also joined out of being manipulated into it and whose like maturity development was stuck at 17 at the ripe age of 34 and who should have never gone into the kg anyway and joined when he was a minor and went through all that trauma as a minor is the responsible adult okay then I never heard this until now and I'm glad because it's just brainrot

that he was an accomplice > if he was an accomplice he'd have had to facilitate it and to take part in it which he hadn't, also considering the guy basically lost his hand and got kicked in the stump to prevent a woman that at that point he didn't even like nor care for from getting raped I doubt he'd have done that and like someone coercing you into agreeing with smth like that doesn't make you an accomplice but ig people don't know what words mean anymore

tywin showed a level of control over his kids > tywin was an abusive af piece of shit who abused the hell out of all his children in different ways which were all reprehensible and trauma-inducing and blaming any of them for shit he did (c. included) is not knowing how to read and not having a clue of how that kinda thing works but if you don't grasp it reading the book then you're hopeless but yeah right obviously he has a level of *control* over them, if you want to please your abusive father at all costs or not want to go against him because you're too afraid to do it ofc he has control over you and again tyrion's adwd not-great stint is because he killed shae who didn't deserve it, not because he killed tywin who had it 100% coming and imvho deserved exactly what he got, hope tyrion feels good about it throughout the whole series

tldr: if someone comes at me blathering that jaime is in any way at fault about tysha when he's dissociated it out of his head for 20 years just because he can't handle the fact that he hurt tyrion that much I'm not even hearing the rest because I know it'll be a braindead take, thanks for coming to my ted talk

[rosquinn]

Hi Roski! I have a question, would you mind to help, please?

Okay, so the other when I was wandering through the shelves of my local library I found our that they have a copy of Madeline's Miller Circe... And I was thinking that maybe I should give it a try? 😅

I know that it's not mythology accurate but as long as the plotline is well-written... Idk maybe I will enjoy in spite of it 🤷🏻‍♀️ Do you is it a good idea?

I just wanted to know if you believe is worth the time or nor

Also, same goes for Achilles's song. They don't have it at the library, but I thought that if I enjoyed Circe I should try it to? 🤔

i used to be a huge madelline miller fan *vaguely gestures at her short story about galatea i still have in my bookshelf for some reason* but i realized she, well, uh, sucks

it's not about her writing, (it's excessively "poetic" and decorated in my opinion but that's subjective) it's that her interpretations are kind of. bad?

i'm gonna elaborate under the cut about why i don't like her (long rant and tw for *mentions of s/a*)

-she victimizes her female main character and makes her go through traumatic experiences to erase and excuse all the bad stuff she's done... "circe turned odysseus' men into pigs bc they tried to assault her" yeah. no. she forced odysseus to sleep with her and turned his men into pigs because she felt like it. i understand you want a feminist badass witch but just. no. she isn't a cute uwu unfairly exiled goddess. what she did to odysseus is sexual abuse.

-she apparently hates women that aren't circe. made thetis, i repeat, our thetis, MOTHER thetis, a homophobic and overprotective mom who wants to kill patroclus in SOA for some reason (wasn't she literally the one who sent patroclus to the war with achilles..... miller..aren't you a classics major..). she did to her what other adaptations do to demeter, basically. and for no reason at all. but i guess her cute baby achilles who is doomed by the narrative can't have a nice mom who let him do whatever he wanted to because that would make him RUDE and EVIL and her character(s) can't have bad qualities. she also made achilles's wife, deidameia, who in some versions is raped by him, a “slut that gets in the way of your gay ship” archetype. she also made her rape achilles for some reason??? and that is fucking horrible

-baby-fied patroclus. he speaks like a stupid teenager girl stereotype in soa and is pretty much a useless human being whose entire personality is simping for achilles. that is not him. he DID fight in the trojan war, he was a SKILLED fighter, not a useless twig, he is described as tall and handsome, he healed some warriors, he is SAVAGE, bro literally broke kebriones's head with a rock in front of his brother and made fun of it??? he tried to climb the walls of troy and conquer it by himself??? he told achilles to stop being a bitch and move his ass??? and then in soa he's a useless piece of shit who DIDN'T EVEN FIGHT IN THE WAR, thinks of himself as weak and was thinking about achilles until the moment he died. sorry to break it to you but his last words in the iliad weren't "omg achilles no😥😥". he threw a whole essay at hector about how he didn't kill shit, it was apollo who beat him and hector's about to get dragged. and when his ghost came back to talk to achilles, it was to tell him to STOP CRYING and KILLING PEOPLE and BURN HIS BODY ALREADY. she completely erased his character. sorry.

-glorified achilles wayyy too much. one thing that i hate about her is how she can't let anyone make mistakes. achilles isn't “noble and doomed by the narrative”. he knew pretty well where he was stepping in and didn't give two shits. he literally says in Iliad book 1 he's there for the mass murder, glory and nothing more. “why would i kill hector what has hector ever done to me” MY ASS. he also was kind of an insufferable bitch in the iliad. i'm tired of people making his decision of stop fighting look “heroic/noble/tragic/etc bc agamemnon is evil” because it was not. he stopped fighting for selfish reasons, treated everyone really bad and let his friends die. also, agamemnon isn't “evil” and achilles isn't “good”. they're both war criminals who act like 8 year olds and kidnap women. every achaean character is a bitch, has killed at least 6 people and enjoyed it. yes. even babyboy patroclus (book 16)

-i'm not even saying this as a person with greek ancestry or a pagan, because i am neither, but her depiction of the gods is TERRIBLE. just what is that whole thing of "gods want mortals to fear them so they worship them"??? that's not even how religion works??? gods can be and in fact are very nice to their worshippers?? why would you villainize cultural figures like that?? and why tf it always gotta be a EVIL FEMALE GODDESS trying to fuck up her main character's life for some reason?? athena wants to kill circe's son in circe and i'm pretty sure they don't even interact in the odyssey?? (maybe they did, i don't remember, but if it happened it was definitely NOT because of that) and why is hermes a manipulator?? and why is ODYSSEUS a manipulator??? you literally sexually assaulted him??? HELLO????

idk, it just feels like mc victimization and random female character villainization (she also put the whole blame of the trojan war on helen because she was “vain” and “selfish”??? didn't she spend the whole iliad blaming herself for the war and wishing to die??)

i don't really like it. it's not a good adaptation

also i'm not the best person to expand on this topic because i am not a gay man/mlm/nblm but some people on tumblr have explained why tsoa is basically mlm fetish and wattpad fujoshi looking crap and they do have a point (the relationship is so stereotyped tbh) so i encourage you to read their posts. i don't have them rn but i can dm them to you later if you want

AND finally, most people in her fanbase can't separate a wattpad fanfic (because that's what tsoa is) from the original text and think tsoa and circe are just like what homer wrote. “hector didn't know it was patroclus” HE FUCKING DID PATROCLUS KILLED 20 PEOPLE IN FRONT OF HIM IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE “patroclus died bc he wasn't a skilled warrior” HE HAS THE SECOND HIGHEST KILL COUNT IN THE WHOLE ILIAD AND WAS FULL OF HUBRIS. HE DIED BECAUSE HE TRIED TO FISTFIGHT A GOD “deidameia raped achilles” “thetis is homophobic” “odysseus is evil” “it was all helen's fault” “circe did nothing wrong” “athena is bad” no (and they act like not shipping patrochilles makes you homophobic which is. cmon. i personally think they def had something going on but it's never explicitly stated and you can't act like it is)

ik i got too aggressive but it's just bad imo, if you want to enjoy a good iliad/odyssey adaptation go play hades or listen to epic the musical or even play limbus company because i swear lc's odysseus, a literal old woman who committed identity fraud, is at least 80 times more in character than miller's babyboys

ADDITION: no i'm not going to dismember you for liking tsoa or circe. this is just a personal opinion. enjoy whatever you want i'm just a little guy and i can't stop you. have fun!