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#And other life circumstances
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all the conversations on my dash about marriage are soooo interesting to me!! I talked to my partner’s mom last night about my intention to propose to her son this week and one of the things we talked about was how there’s this really insidious aspect of white feminism that convinces us that marriage and family are shameful or stupid to want because the real things in life are outside the home (ie. working under capitalism). That belief has historical roots in anti blackness and the split between white feminists and black feminists back in the 60s/70s. And idk it’s just so interesting to see how my mom, who raised me with a very strong foundation of second wave feminism, influenced my perception of pursuing my own happiness in ways that feel authentic to me! I love hard! And I want to be surrounded by love for the rest of my life! But in the back of my head, the entire six years of my relationship, her voice has been saying “you don’t need a man, marriage is not something to aspire to because it makes you weak and dependent.” Which is just so interesting bc she’s never said those exact words, but that’s the messaging that we get from second wave/white feminism. The thing is that I DO need other people! Nobody is actually independent, and it is a myth created by capitalism to fracture communities so that every single person is financially motivated to secure their own safety/basic needs without ever needing to rely on anyone else! Everybody needs their own personal house, car, furniture, dishes, electronics, etc because sharing is inherently “undeveloped”.
I was talking to my therapist about this recently and I brought up New Romantics, and how being a young adult in a cultural setting informed strongly by second wave feminism really convinced me (and a lot of people) that the Liberated way to be a woman was to not care about seeking that life-long stability in a partner. That to be free meant never opening yourself up to the vulnerability of a marital commitment. Which then leads into the lavender haze thinking of “the only kind of girl they see is a one night or a wife” which, by self-gaslighting, devalues marriage (she’s valid for this! We should not be put in boxes like that!).
Idk I just have been thinking a lot about the right to legally unite families, and how much power that union can have, and that there is in fact nothing Wrong with wanting to exercise the political right to choose your family. And I know, having worked with hundreds if not thousands of domestic violence survivors, how dangerous marriage can be. Being legally and financially bound to someone, especially if you haven’t been working outside the home during your marriage, can truly fuck up a person’s life and their ability to leave a situation. Idk I’m just thinking out loud, but to tie this all back into the conversations on here the last few days about Taylor and Travis, I just think that for some people, the reflexive horror at her potentially being engaged could be coming from a similar place of devaluing the pursuit of family/love in the context of a white feminist capitalist culture, which harms us all.
The revolution starts at home! And that doesn’t mean that nobody should be making commitments to each other ever!! And nobody should be forced or coerced into lifelong commitments, either. Pursuing and entering a marriage with someone who respects you, empowers you, wants to work together towards a shared vision of the future, listens to you, and shares responsibilities with you is an AMAZING thing! And as my partner’s mom said so simply to me last night: it deserves to be celebrated!!
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coddda · 3 months
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I wish we could have met in some other way.
Lawlight Week Day 2: Soulmates
If you saw me repost and re-edit this several times uh No you didn't </3
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If you know what every frame is from you get a free cookie. by the way
#death note#dn#light yagami#l lawliet#lawlight#oh god here we go#death note jdrama#death note 2015#death note 2006#death note musical#lctw#l change the world#dntm#lawlightweek2024#my art#collapses i am NEVER putting this much effort in one piece ever again /hj this was the Only one i had mostly prepared in advance#ironically the most painstaking part about making this entire thing was converting the images into an animated file#that wasn't either horrifically compressed or just. wouldn't loop. why do gifs have to look so BAD it's so inconvenient#and THEN i realized I had to forcibly Stitch the two animations together so they would actually be synced and it wouldn't look dumb#and the end result is STILL so compressed. because Tumblr. uhhh just don't click on it it'll look so scuffed LOL. anyways#this is what i get for watching Every Adaptation of Death Note. i am a death note multiverse truther#usually i'd have something clever to say in the tags but. this drained the life out of me just uh.#yeah. they're doomed in every universe. this is the only way they could've met. they are doomed by their own natures and the#circumstances that surround them. there is no universe where light tries to prevent L's death. and even in the cases where L Doesn't die#there is no universe where L can save light. there is no universe where he can truly “catch” Kira and make him see where he went wrong#(<- if you read LCTW you know. :) )#in every universe and adaptation L will call Light his first friend. in some universes they'll take that notion more seriously than others#no matter what one of them will die due to the other. its the only constant. it's the only way it can ever be. they are the others downfall
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leminaus · 4 months
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is it ok to be a little selfish
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gayeddieagenda · 4 months
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i know we all joke about buck and eddie and their coparenting of chris, them babytrapping each other and this that and the other, but they've never had 2 navigate their relationship without chris being central to it. which on the one hand is like. cute. chris is such a cornerstone of what buck and eddie both mean to each other, and they both obviously love him separate from their relationship with each other ('do you know how much christopher misses you?'), but also it's genuinely interesting to think about them navigating what that relationship looks like without christopher around. partly because i think sometimes they use chris as shorthand or an excuse between them ('do you know how much christopher misses you?' but bass boosted). eddie defines buck's role in chris's life on paper, bc he can't define buck's role in eddie's life. how much they both love chris is obvious and it's a safe place for how they feel about each other to land. and it's interesting 2 think about them being put in a position to navigate that relationship without the buffer or go-between of christopher for the first time since they met
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demigods-posts · 10 days
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me whenever i see people write off annabeth as an annoying and controlling and crazily jealous girlfriend with anger issues. understanding that the foundation of the rhetoric is based off of annabeth's behavior toward percy and rachel is tbotl and tlo. except annabeth's behavior in those books is soley due to the surplus amount of traumatic experiences she's had. ranging from her parents neglecting to care for her well-being when spiders attacked her in the middle of the night as a seven-year-old. to watching everyone she's ever dared to care for die, abandon, or leave her for a better option. so it's much more likely than annabeth was expressing great mental and emotional distress during a period of her life where it was uncertain if the boy she loved would drop dead on his sixteenth birthday. on top of having to uphold a reputation as the best strategist at camp half-blood and devise a plan to fight in a war and save the world before she's a sophomore in high school. so the notion that annabeth is an abusive and toxic individual lacks the consideration that maybe she was just a child forced to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders at all times.
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cubbihue · 13 days
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What does Timmy think of his little brother Peri growing up to have a neurotic personality?
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Peri's always had severe anxiety. It sorta comes with being the first baby born in a 1000 years and constantly being kidnapped by everyone around you.
Timmy's just glad Peri grew up to be more confident in himself, and more assertive.
Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]
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willosword · 8 months
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love vox squeezing the other vees close when he's anxious like they're his goddamn stuffed animals
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sangrefae · 3 months
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does anyone else spend a concerning about of time thinking abt laios being the one to kill chimera falin or am i just unwell
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netherdevil · 4 months
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this is like essentially their dynamic i think
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benoitblanc · 6 months
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no no you guys don't get it. the x files cancer arc was, excuse the pun, a fucking white whale of a tv plotline that would not have worked nearly as well on literally any other show. it was a complete hail mary. the writers' room nearly didn't make it happen because they were worried it would fall too deeply into soap opera territory. and on any other show, it would! but the x files is about four key things: mistrust in the government, faith in both science and the otherworldly, building a life around trauma, and the fine line between love and codependency. it is the only show where the entirety of this situation- a government experiment on an unwilling young catholic leads to a terminal illness that is counteracted by a literal scientific miracle in the eleventh hour due to her partner's refusal to accept her impending death- could both happen at all and happen well. none of the themes in the cancer arc were new to txf at all. they'd all been lurking, to some extent, in the background since the pilot. the cancer arc wasn't merely milking a left-field catastrophe for the drama, it shoved the overarching themes of the show to the front and said look. look what these people are to each other. look how impossible it is to face the darkness alone. regardless of when the plotline was conceived, it was always going to happen. it was the only way the story could have ever gone. they were always doomed from the beginning
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tyrianlynch · 10 months
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Ronan and Hennessy and “I’ve been alone a long time” and “please don’t let me be the only one” and “why do you even care?” “I don’t know I just do” and “don’t let me fall too hard lynch” and “she’s a dreamer, like me” and “no one else gets it, this is what we live with” and “he’ll be drawn to you more than to me” and “I’m not a doll Ronan lynch” and “Hennessy. He had forgotten he could know people. And how he knew her!” and “they didn’t say sorry they didn’t have to” and “if I told you I was going to help you get out of this, would you believe me?” “you’re one of the very few people I would” and “now they were just two ex dreamers made fearless by life” and “don’t be only human just now Ronan lynch”
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mortellanarts · 3 months
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fandom sleeping on the most toxic yuri pairing in the entire series simply because they never spoke in canon smh
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pearl-crystals · 1 month
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Its funny because I just said I wasnt finished with the lantern and I just finished it now haha.
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They have been contained at the Favor Tree. I took some close ups and they are so nice. Its so comfy to be around too. I will probably use it at night sometimes to see or just for fun.
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Under the readmore are the pictures in color!
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Jeremy Von Neuschwanstein and Shuli Von Neuschwanstein || On the quiet, all-consuming loves that toe between companionship and romance, grief and simple happiness, looming tragedy and guilty pleasures, and thus shouldn't be acted upon.
Illustrations from A Stepmother's Marchen / Hedgehog's Dilemma, Wikipedia / Waiting Room by Phoebie Bridgers / A Poem From The Adult Daughter To The Narcissistic Mother by Katherine Fabrizio / People Will Say We're In Love, Oklahoma! / Twilight by Stephanie Meyer / tumblr post by starpeace / The Cart by Mary Reufle / Haiku [for you] by Sonia Sanchez / Close to You by niki / Spend Some Time by Eminem / Every Day by David Levithan / Unknown / In a Dream You Saw a Way to Survive by Clementine Von Radics / Anchorite (Love You Very Much) by Car Seat Headrest / Unknown / Biotherm (for Bill Berkson) by Frank O' Hara / New and Selected Poems Volume 1 by Mary Oliver / tumblr post by chateauofmymind / Unknown / Kate McGahan / Waiting by Caitlyn Siehl / P.S. I Still Love You by Jenny Han / Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs / tumblr post by poetrylovesongs, / The Best of Me by Nicholas Sparks / song for a lover (of long ago) by Bon Iver / please don't forget me and all the things that we did by Isaac Love / The Sea, the Sea by Iris Murdoch / The Winner's Kiss, Marie Rutkoski / In another universe by Dana Lee / The Crucible: A Play in Four Acts by Arthur Miller / Two Slow Dancers by Mitski / Maybe In Another Universe, I Deserve You by Gaby Dunn / Next Time by Team StarKid / Jonathan Carroll / The Moon Will Sing by The Crane Wives / Pyrrhic Victory, Wikipedia / Raushan Ranjan / All My Pretty Ones by Anne Sexton / Your Best American Girl by Mitski / twitter post by fran (galacticidiots) / War of the Foxes by Richard Siken / Crush by Richard Siken / The Garden of Eden by Ernest Hemingway / twitter post by mountain. (sainticide) / The Unabridged Journals Of Sylvia Plath by Sylvia Plath / Crescendo by Becca Fitzpatrick / SANDARAFREEDOMPARK / Unknown / Unsent Project / twitter post by aiman (dumbsoftheart) / there is no absolution for the fallen, only the dying by p.d / Unknown / Someone New by Hozier / Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays by Christa Wolf / A Self-Portrait in Letters by Anne Sexton / Unknown / “I get so jealous of euthanized dogs” by June Gehringer / Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte
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spooky-pop · 2 months
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I don't need to make another AU I don't need to make another AU I don't need to make another AU I don't need to make another AU I don't need to make another AU I don't need to make another AU
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cator99 · 2 months
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out of curiosity, would you consider yourself butch?
used to be a blonde underweight twink and now I'm a based jock still got the chanel bag and the sick albeit matured mind of a suckpig to prove it so I'm gonna let you decide whether you wanna call me that word just cuz I got a pussy and short hair. I promise you that there have been enough advancements made in the art of lesbian sexual dynamics in the past 50 years to broaden the vocabulary used to describe the plethora of types of masculine females.
#being called butch just reminds me of how much males have the freedom to navigate between male archetypes and how people pay attention to#the distinguishing features of these varying masculinities#but when a female is seen as masculine it all gets lumped under the “butch” category#her masculinity is seen as unnatural and therefore incapable of being considered genuine or taken at face value as it is with males.#its always brought into question instead of taken in consideration with the rest of the woman's life and experiences and her particularities#Hence... Butch is still being treated as though its a huge lesbian cultural phenomena instead of a specific niche thing#also i dont mean to invite the “you dont pass!!” anons again bc that idiot is missing my point entirely (which is that im truly not trying)#but the fact is that for the past 3 years i have found myself increasingly navigating the male social world#and discovering what it means to me as a female to have access to the ability to take my “masculinity” for granted... relax#forget about it#etc#i think thats entirely antithetical to the Butch thing which seems to rest on the tension of other peoples expectations of her#people broadly are more surprised to find out that im interested in women just as much as they're surprised that im a gym queen iykwim...#ive worked hard for this and now that ive gotten the Woman Social Role thing pretty much entirely out of the way i am living the dream#i think a large part of that is learning as a dyke to appropriate the language of gay men theres a reason their terminology had#staying power even when their scene was *literally* dying meanwhile all that seemed to survive from dyke spaces was butch n femme ??#its because theirs didnt necessitate the building and maintenance of a scene in order for the subculture to hold its head above water#their labels *largely* weren't predicated on their relationships to gender roles and its telling that for dykes it was#their labels rested on the need to simply show up anonymous n be able to easily flag whether they were looking to fuck or be fucked#alongside the set of circumstances under which they would be fucking or getting fucked or what have you#it all comes back to the restrictions of female social blah blah blah and i think the sooner we collectively set down what we see as our#responsibility as lesbians and as feminists to Be A Woman the sooner we can step outside of that#n start thinking clearly about our individual circumstances and the necessity of putting on your own oxygen mask first before helping others
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