#Trying not to spiral. In dire ass physical straits and being treated gently beyond all precedent in them

[adhdo5]

An incomplete list of things LXC daydreamed about while holed up somewhere hiding from the Wen in occupied Yunmeng with nothing better to do and it's the most unstable and terrifying experience of his life but at least his rescuer is life-changingly hot

Kissing Meng Yao under the moonlight. Obviously

Calling him a-Yao. Also obviously

Showing Meng Yao around a fine and normal Cloud Recesses

Someone from the Cloud Recesses showing up and LXC introducing them to his wonderful rescuer

Nie Mingjue showing up and LXC introducing him to his wonderful rescuer

Mentally replaying the time Meng Yao held his hand for 37 full seconds and the expression MY was wearing about being allowed to

Meng Yao holding his hand forever maybe?

Meng Yao's lips have been a bit dry with the cold lately and he licked them the other day and LXC has been thinking since about what would happen if he'd been like Hhey can I t;ake care o fthat for yuo

"Meng-gongzi, I... I've never been at someone's mercy like this before..." "Don't worry. I'll be gentle ^_^"

Meng Yao's beautiful dazzling mind means he manages to get some vital information abt the Wen troop movements and this wins them the war and he's legitimized and it's awesome and some idiot says MY would be nothing without LXC's vouch and LXC goes You have it the wrong way around... I would be nothing without him 💗 and then the entire bus claps and cheers for MY yayyyy ☺️

Hearing out Meng Yao's miseries and reassuring him and holding him gently. Meng Yao of course tries to bear it alone and with grace but Lan Xichen is honored to hear out Meng Yao's woes and be of any sort of help he can... 🥺

"Ah... you've... found a conveniently remote and/or insulated space that one could theoretically play a musical instrument in without alerting unwanted attention...? Would Meng-gongzi mind terribly if Xichen played a song for him....? :looks at you with my sopping wet romantic eyes:..."

Seeing Meng Yao's wrists

Seeing Meng Yao's collarbones

Seeing Meng Yao's... well... let's just say...

"[coughs weakly] Please, Meng-gongzi... it isn't your fault... it's only by your kindness I survived as long as I did... Meng-gongzi, the qiankun bags in my effects are the remains of the Cloud Recesses library... you must return them to Gusu when it is safe... tell my didi... tell Wangji I believe in him and I'm sorry..."

Actually saying something abt the Cloud Recesses and how fucked up scared he is right now and having Meng Yao actually comfort him. Which is of course the most shameful daydream of all.

"Meng-gongzi, with such news of the Cloud Recesses... I... I'm afraid I have nothing to repay your kindness with... whatever shall I do... all I can offer you to settle my debt is..... my body.........."

Just straight up unvarnished contextless sex. It's been a minute and he is tired and miserable and scared and horny they can't all have plots