#And I don't want to make others my main characters

[thisisntmyrightera]

Together - CHO HYUN-JU x Fem Reader

Summary: Reader is scammed and abandoned by her boyfriend, leaving her alone in South Korea to her fate, so in desperate search of a solution to return to her home country she decides to join the squid games to get money, within the game she meets a couple of people who become her friends and could possibly be something more.

Warning: In this episode none!

In futures episodes: Violence, Strong language, female main character is considered heterosexual but she have feelings for a female (Cho Hyun-ju) and it is reciprocated, abuse for male characters.

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You were stupid, very stupid and naive, that was what you repeated to yourself every day since your ex-boyfriend scammed you and abandoned you in a country where you didn't know anyone, you couldn't even understand the language well and now you were locked up in a place full of strangers in a green uniform and with a headache you could barely bear.

Why were you doing such stupid things? You should have said no when that man approached you and offered you money, it was all for the damn money, otherwise how would you find another way to get home?

Barely a day had passed, you understood little of the first game where you saw one person after another die around you, what you had gotten yourself into, this wasn't a game, it was a massacre, as you sat cross-legged on the cold bed that had been assigned to you you could feel your hands shaking and you felt warm tears rolling down your cheeks.

Hey - a kind voice rumbled slowly but enough to wake you from your trance to look up and see a boy with long, slicked-back hair holding a small metal tray - I noticed you didn't come over for your food, I brought you some

His equally shaky hand moved a little closer to you, leaving the tray on the bed, staring at you, afraid you'd react

It's okay if you don't want to eat it, it's just that if we're going to keep playing you need strength for tomorrow - his kind but shy smile and his clear disinterest in leaving made you wipe your tears with the sleeves of your sweater, nodding taking a deep breath - Thanks - you told him, trying not to sound upset, because you really weren't and if you were it was only with yourself

My name is Dae-Ho, yours is… 144 - he looked at you curiously taking a bite of his food

Y/N… my name is Y/N - you sighed, hugging your legs uncomfortably and nervous

Hey, leave her alone - a loud and somewhat curious voice sounded behind Dae-Ho making the two look towards the sound - don't you see that you're making her uncomfortable? go away

I… I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, it's just that… - Dae-Ho looked at you embarrassed, walking away just a few steps

You don't have to give explanations, go away - the girl, a little taller than Dae-Ho, looked at him firmly, almost annoyed, following the man with her gaze as he walked away quickly and embarrassed, joining a group of men on the other shelf of beds

you can eat in peace - the girl looked at you kindly while you only responded with a slight nod and she walked away returning to her place two beds down on the shelf next to you

It was difficult for you not to go unnoticed and it was obvious that everyone wanted to get away from you, you weren't like them, you didn't share their nationality, their traditions, or their topics of conversation, you didn't even understand many of them what they were talking about, they all looked at you like a weirdo, like why a foreigner could come and want to steal their prize, it was unfair.

That's how you spent the first night, alone, trembling from the cold and fear, looking into the darkness while you cried silently and the gunshots echoed in your ears, it was a nightmare and that's how you were until sleep overcame you

The second day wasn't any better, you could barely carry yourself, you were tired, hungry and much more scared than yesterday, surrounded by hundreds of people in a courtyard with drawings of children and rainbows on the floor.

''Now, it's time to form teams of 5, you have 10 minutes'' the voice of the speaker sounded repeatedly before an alarm sounded and you saw how everyone ran looking for members for their team, but everyone seemed to avoid you like a plague.

They ran and pushed you but no one looked at you to join and if they looked at you it was to laugh and murmur

There she was again, standing in front of you with a sad look that barely met your eyes she looked at the floor and walked by your side.

Hey… - you murmured barely, only to her with fear and shame - if you still don't have a team… I can join you if you don't mind - she looked at you over her shoulder giving a sigh of relief nodding offering you her hand so she could walk by your side and not get lost in the crowd

Between your fingers you could notice the difference in size between your small and fragile hand and hers, it was big with a different strength and somewhat rough but still made you feel protected and confident

So you both walked almost in circles finding the fragile old woman and her son and then the little girl with bangs forming a team of 5

Again the games were confusing for you, you could identify some that resembled what you had once played in your country but fear consumed you making your hands tremble again

Calm down - her voice again fragile but somewhat thick made you look at her holding the air - everything will be fine, don't push yourself too much okay? Do you think you can take charge of throwing the rocks? It's just a matter of taking a rock, throwing it and making the second one fall, that's all you have to do - her voice was like a murmur trying not to interrupt the game of the first two teams that were participating

Should I just throw it? - you looked at her nervously, looking at her dark eyes behind her bangs

You just have to throw it, it's easy - she smiled at you giving you hope making you smile barely as you looked at the floor again nervously trying not to think about everything that was tormenting your head, in the background you could hear the screams and cheers that the other players made while the teams participated until a round of gunshots made you jump scared covering your ears and closing your eyes tightly - calm down, calm down nothing is happening - her arms surrounded you quickly, adjusting you against her chest, you could feel the strands of her hair on your face and a slight aroma of herbs coming from it - it's over, don't open your eyes until I tell you okay?

Your head barely nodded as you took a deep breath, the aroma of her hair made you remember the gardens where you walked when you first arrived in South Korea and her arms for some reason made you feel protected, nothing could happen to you

A couple of minutes (that seemed like an eternity) passed slowly, people were talking, some were crying and in the background you could hear the sound of the sirens of the forklifts that had come to pick up the bodies, one second after another it was a damn nightmare.

''Next team, you can take your position'' the voice from the speaker again

It's our turn - the old woman sighed getting up while you opened your eyes and stood up slowly with fear

The guards tied your ankles and after a shot the game for you began.

You walked counting the steps, being constant and fast in your tasks, first Ddjaki, the little girl with the bangs did well, then the flying rock, your trembling hands held it strong and letting out a deep sigh you threw it against the rock in the distance failing in the attempt

Girl concentrate, what's wrong with you! - the old woman shouted making your friend look at her annoyed and after her firm indication and walking as a team to pick it up the 5 of them returned to their position - don't fail, please girl!

We trust you… calm down, take a breath and throw it, you'll do well - Your new best friend looked at you smiling lightly giving you courage.

A sigh again, a fixed look at the rock and after throwing it it fell with a blow.

Everyone screamed, applauded and so on again until reaching the final task ''Team 2, you have completed your tasks'' you had never been so happy to hear that spooky voice on the speaker and once the guards untied your ankles they all ran screaming and laughing to the fence that separated you from the rest of the players, you could finally return to the dormitory and finally had survived another day.

Everyone was happy, so much so that all of you were jumping and screaming with excitement, your friend, the tall girl ran to you without wasting a second surrounding you with her strong arms making you spin in the air while both of you laughed

We did it, I told you, we did it right - she laughed jumping with you still in her arms making you scream when you felt the air on your face and your legs hanging in the air

Now, stop it, you're going to make her dizzy - the old woman laughed patting her back as a sign that it was enough until you heard gunshots in the distance again making the team erase their smile and remember the horrible place where they were

Come on let's sit down - her hand slowly and carefully took yours walking towards the bed shelves climbing up and sitting on the steps - are you okay?

Yes… I'm pretty well, thanks for helping me - you smiled rubbing your hands on your legs nervously

By the way, my name is Cho Hyun-Ju… are you? - she looked at you curiously

Y/N… my name is Y/N - you smiled shyly at her

You have a very pretty name - she smiled back shyly with her cheeks slightly tinted - thanks for letting me join you in the game you were the only person who approached me

You don't have to thank me, I think we are both rejected for certain reasons and that makes us unique in the crowd right? it's better to be united and be stronger than alone - your cheeks felt hot, the sign that they were red like cherries

You're right..

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Thanks for reading, this is the first episode I've written about Squid Game and it was short since I have little time to update but I didn't want to go to sleep without writing the beginning of the story, I have ideas but I'd like to hear yours and write them down, just to reinforce the theme of this story the reader and Cho Hyun-ju will possibly have a romance so if these themes aren't to you please don't read it, I know you'll find something that suits your tastes. 🫶🏻

Again, Thanks for reading, I'll be back soon!

BTW: Happy New Year everyone 🥂✨

[tackykachowch]

By the way, did we ever talk about how stupid it is that they made Silco the reason Felicia died? I don't mean that he killed her personally, but that he jumpstarted violence on a peaceful protest. Because that's sooo who Silco is, right? A character who makes impulsive and poorly thought out decisions, right? A character who goes into a fight headstrong without carefully planning his moves and strategy and just YOLO-ing it, right? Right?? ......sigh

And don't even THINK about giving me the whole "wElL hE cHaNgEd SiNcE tHeN dUh" crap. Even s2 is smart enough to show us him writing something in a notebook in a flashback, which implies that he was the brains behind the Lanes' creation/revolution as a whole. And if he was he would never sabotage his own plans with something so stupid as throwing a single molotov at enforcers. Literally who does that???? Silco we know would probably organize an attack under the guise of a peaceful protest, but not just. Straight-up ruining just a regular peaceful protest. That's stupid. And Silco is the last character in arcane that would do something stupid. Literally the whole plot of season 1 relies on him being intelligent and sneaky with his plans are you kidding me.

[thewertsearch]

@krixwell asked: I think it's general theory summary o'clock. Broadly, what are your expectations for the rest of Act 5 and its ending?

I'm a little late answering this one - but hey, better late than never!

I can't predict the rest of the Act anymore, but I can try and predict the ending. Here are my predictions for what'll happen in Cascade, organized by character.

Rose & Dave

The Derse twins, who have dispatched DD together, meet Aradia at the Green Sun. The Tumor detonates as planned, but Aradia is able to save them somehow, possibly by spiriting them away with time travel...

...or, by telling them how she cheated death.

Aradia was able to resurrect herself without a backup body, from a pedestal hidden within the moon of Derse; the very moon the kids are currently piloting. Doc Scratch has already hinted that Rose might ascend on 'another quest bed somewhere', and I think this is how she - and Dave - could do it.

If Rose and Dave died destroying the Sun, it would almost certainly count as Heroic – but that doesn't actually matter. If the twins die on Quest Slabs, they won't die as God Tiers - they'll die as mortals, and resurrect as God Tiers. They should reincarnate safely, as the Sun collapses for good.

The Meteor Crew

To be honest, I don't think the trolls will have much of a role to play in the endgame. All the action is happening in the kids' session, and now that the Scratch has started, they can't even contact that session.

In any case, these kids are planning to follow the Green Sun's explosion to a predetermined rendezvous point. I'm not sure how they're going to get there - but Kanaya is a wielder of the Space Aspect, so maybe it's her time to shine.

...I mean, shine even more brightly than she already does.

Jack

After he absolutely kills CD, Jack is destined to travel to the troll session, but I still have no idea how. Perhaps the dimensional instability created by the Scratch will start to rip holes into other sessions, and he’ll be lured into one? Who knows.

I'm as stumped as I ever was. Only one way to find out, I guess!

John

Once he's triggered the Scratch, this kid's going to need an out. He'll need to make himself scarce in order to avoid being erased...

...or, perhaps he won’t. Perhaps, as the Heir of Breath, he’ll be able to use the Breeze to conceal himself from whatever force is destroying the session, the same way he hid his scent from Jack.

Either way, he'll probably be fine, while the same cannot be said for...

Jade

The greatest of Fs for our girl. Jade's been killed in an extremely tense situation, without leaving much hope for her resurrection before the Scratch.

The Sprites are still around, but I don’t know how they’d revive her- like, sure, Nanna has a healing beam, but I don’t think she can heal death. Plus, Jade made a Choice with Echidna to locate her Final Frog - and it seems that accepting a Choice will inevitably lead you to sacrifice your life. If Jade's death was immediately undone, would it really count as a sacrifice?

I don't want to call it too early, but... it isn't out of the question that Jade is gone for good. Especially when she's already got a replacement, waiting in the wings.

Jadesprite

I think it's genuinely possible that Jadesprite could take over Jade's role as one of the 'main' four kids.

She's about to lose her First Guardian powers, but she should still have time to fulfil Echidna's request in her realself's stead, simply by shrinking the entire session, and teleporting it to the Furthest Ring, where her allies can captchalogue it. Hell, this would be easy for her.

I really, really don't want Jade to be dead. But, well... she made a Choice.

The Endgame

Finally, we see the consequences of the Green Sun’s destruction, which I’m sure are as cataclysmic as they are unexpected. Rose realizes how badly she was played, as Scratch's full hand is finally revealed. All of Paradox Space shakes from the impact. Scratch and Snowman die, and English consumes the troll universe.

Everyone meets up on the exiled Lands, and they resolve to travel to the reset session, once it’s spawned.

Act 6?

After we're done, I’m hoping for the Guardians-as-Players to get the Hivebent treatment – by which I mean, I’m hoping Act 6 gives us the full story of the Scratched session, right from kid Nanna standing in her bedroom. It’s also possible, though, that we’ll join their session in medias res, as our protagonists' teenage parents face hitherto unknown challenges in a new Medium. I'll talk more about my specific predictions for the Guardian session in their own post, once Act 5 has fully concluded.

The adventure continues, as the kids slowly realize that English, and the Paradox Space twisted to suit his ends, is the true enemy, and they begin to make plans to confront him directly.

[dailynnt]

FRIENDS WITHIN TOUCHING DISTANCE

⊹ Summary: Jungkook and you, his childhood friend, live together in an apartment, sharing space as roommates. Your relationship, built on years of friendship, is gradually becoming strained by growing sexual tension. You decide to become friends with benefits, trying not to complicate your feelings. But Jungkook's world is not so simple. When you begin to realize that he is hiding something, you open the veil of his double life - a world of mafia, criminal activity, and risk that could ruin not only your deal, but everything you valued in each other.

⊹ Couple: Jeon Jungkook/ Fem!Reader

⊹ Characters: The Reader, Jeon Jungkook, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, Min Yoongi, Kim Seokjin, Kim Namjoon, Jeon Hoseok.

⊹ 🔞 Age restrictions: 18+

⊹ 👩🏼‍❤️��👨🏻 Relationships: ⚤

⊹ Number of part: 17/?

⊹ 🖇️ Tags: best friends, friends with benefits, slow longing, sexual tension, protected sex, unprotected sex, alcohol, drunken sex, inexperienced main character, mafia au, illegal trade, deaths of minor characters, weapons, swear words.

⊹ 👩🏼‍💻From the author: Hello everyone. Happy New Year 🎄💜 I managed to write another part for you, so consider it a gift, because I wrote it as soon as I could and when I could to make it to the 31st 🥹 I hope you like it, as always ❤️‍🔥 I also want to thank everyone who likes my story, you can't even imagine how happy I am 🤭🥺 I didn't expect such a success at all 🥹🥹🥹

⊹ 🫂Dedication: For you, my love @myjungkookthighs. You are my favorite person 😘🥰 You know that I appreciate you so much and love you🥰💜

⊹ ⚠️ Warning: English is not my native language, so there may be mistakes in the text. Please don't get mad at me too much! Those under 18, please don't read this story!

⊹ 📋Tag list: @myjungkookthighs, @notsevenwithyou, @nikkinikj, @lovelyyylunaa222, @jiminiemanura (If anyone wants to be in my tag list let me know)

≣ Chapter Index ↓

Part 17. The flame of sympathy

You were shocked by the number of dishes your mom had prepared for dinner. Fortunately, the yukkejang hadn't burned while you were busy in your room. Now it stood in the center of the table in a large ceramic bowl. Its aromatic waves spread across the room, filling it with the spiciness of chili peppers, the sweetness of green onions, and the richness of beef broth.

Your mother placed the pickled crabs that Jungkook loved so much closer to him. She presented them on a large plate, garnished with fresh red pepper rings and green onions. The main dishes on the table also included kimchi, pibimbap, pajons, rice, and pickled vegetables.

You helped set the table. Your father arrived just as you and Jungkook were going down to the kitchen. You couldn't help but think that you had finished on time, otherwise it would have been very embarrassing.

You sat down next to Jungkook on his left hand, and your mom and dad sat across from you two. Dad was happy to see Jungkook, and of course, just like your mom had done earlier, he was asking him questions. He was also interested in what Jungkook did for a living. Because the Mercedes that was parked outside your house indicated that Jungkook had a prestigious job. Your parents knew from Jungkook's mother that his job was related to security. Dad was interested in what kind of duties he had.

You were a little nervous when the conversation turned to Jungkook's job. But Jungkook answered calmly and even relaxed, lying in such a way that if you didn't know the truth, you would believe it. But heck, you were in your parents' shoes not so long ago. You believed his lies without knowing what your friend really lived.

Jungkook ate a lot. He enjoyed your mother's food because he always loved what she cooked. There was a mix in his mouth: crabs, yukkejang, pajon, rice, in a word, Jungkook ate as if he had no bottom in his stomach. You admired him unnoticed, you liked to watch him eat with such enthusiasm. You were especially mesmerized when he ate something really tasty. He never spared emotions on his face or words about the taste.

Right now, there was such a scene before your eyes. He was eating the pickled crab that your mom had prepared and was delighted. His eyebrows were drawn together, his eyes were closed, and his expression was one of absolute delight.

The first piece of crab was rated as "divine" and even received applause for its taste. All the other pieces that went into Jungkook's mouth made him almost moan with pleasure. You even blushed when he moaned several times so hard that you almost choked. It reminded you of the sounds he made during sex. Your mom was happy with Jungkook's reaction to her cooking. For her, there is nothing better than someone eating her food with such enthusiasm.

You had a delicious dinner and for dessert, you ate sunpyeon (crescent-shaped rice cakes filled with sesame seeds, honey, and beans), cakes, and donuts (for you) that Jungkook brought with him for the visit.

"Thank you for the delicious dinner!" - Jungkook said when he was finally full.

"You are welcome. I'm going to pickle some more crabs, so when you go to Seoul, stop by and I'll give you a bag to take with you." - Your mom said.

"I will be leaving city with Y/N in a few days. So I will definitely stop by for crabs." - Jungkook said. You were a little taken aback. You hadn't realized that he would want to take you to Seoul. You could have stayed with your parents longer. Celebrate the new year. Why does he want you to go with him? You didn't say anything, didn't object.

"In a few days?" - Your father asked again. Your mother was also surprised, because you hadn't told your parents that you were coming for a short time. They thought you were coming to spend some time with them and celebrate the new year.

"Yes." - Jungkook replied firmly. He couldn't leave you here without his supervision, not after what happened at the Christmas party in Niseko. Besides, his job in Seoul doesn't allow for days off. Not even on holidays. "Didn't she tell you? A friend of ours is opening a new club on New Year's Eve, and we were invited. I thought we'd together visit you and my parents after the New Year, but it turned out that Y/N left earlier. I decided that since that happened, I would come to pick her up and also visit my parents." - Jungkook said. But no one invited you to the club opening. Is he lying again? Or is it really true?

"Of course. Y/N didn't tell us anything." - Your mom said, a little sad, but smiling.

"I thought I wasn't going to go to that party because I had a quarreled with Jungkook. That's why I didn't say anything." - You supported Jungkook's lie. If he wants to take you away, there may be reasons. Either it's his "work" or Doohoon had something to do with it. Jungkook looked at you, smiling slightly. He was pleased that you didn't resist, but immediately agreed to go home together.

"Did you have a quarreled?" - You heard your father's voice.

"Yes, Taegu, I'll explain everything to you later. No need to confuse the children." - Your mom said quickly. She got up from the table. "Son, I'll put some crabs with me now for you to have breakfast."

"I would like to decline out of politeness. But they are so delicious, I won't do it." - Jungkook said. You laughed, that’s Jungkook style. Your mom laughed shyly too, because she was pleased with Jungkook's constant praise.

While mom was packing a package for Jungkook, you cleared the table. Dad and Jungkook kindly helped you. While you were doing the dishes, your mom and dad continued to interrogate Jungkook. You could hear them talking in the living room from the kitchen. It was well after 8 p.m. outside, and Jungkook was in no hurry to go home. You thought he was waiting for you to walk him to his car.

"Jungkook, son, did you find a girlfriend?" - Your mom asked. When you heard her question, you almost dropped the ceramic pot where was yukkejan in it. You didn't expect her to ask him about his personal life. Jungkook didn't flinch and answered almost immediately.

"I have a girlI like." - He said. You listened intently. Is this girl you?

"You just like her? You're dating?" - Your mom asks.

"No, we can't because of my job." - Jungkook answers without hesitation. You think it's some kind of weird excuse. "I work a lot, so she won't even think about going out with me."

"If she likes you too, it won't be a problem." - Says your father. "The main thing is that you have weekends and don't work until the morning, and go out with her every night. Then it will be fine." - your father advises. You can hear Jungkook laughing.

"Sometimes I work until the morning, or I'm gone for several days at home. My job is such that I have to accompany a client on his travels. So I don't think I'll have a chance." - Jungkook says. You can't figure out if he's just making this excuse so no one will know about you or if he really doesn't want to have a relationship with you. You're a little outraged. You need to clarify what the status of your relationship is now. Are you still friends with benefits or are you dating? Because the words "you are mine" can only mean that you are his girlfriend. The thought of being Jungkook's girlfriend makes you excited. It sounds so unusual.

"What kind of job is this that makes it impossible to have a relationship? Honey, quit that job and find something to do so you don't have to be a bachelor forever." - Your mom said. You thought she sounded harsh. Your mom sometimes says things that can hurt. But Jungkook laughed again. He didn't seem offended in the least.

"I'll make a lot of money, and then I'll quit and find a woman. I'm only 24, there's still time." - Jungkook assured. You washed the dishes and went into the living room where they were all sitting. Jungkook saw you and kept his eyes on you. He was smiling slyly. You waved him off so he wouldn't stare at you. You stood next to your father, putting your hands on his shoulders. Dad felt your hands and put his on top of yours.

"Let me walk you to the car." - You suggested to Jungkook. He stood up when he heard you say that. It was really time to go, but he wasn't going to leave without you.

"Actually, I wanted to proposed you first. I have a gift for you. But it's not in the car. We need to go to a place. So you should go change." - Jungkook said. You froze in confusion. He said in Niseko, that he had a gift, and he promised to give it to you to nightly . Is this some kind of a restaurant or something? But you just had dinner, so the restaurant is out. Where can you go at eight in the evening for a gift? You didn't have any ideas.

You agreed and went to your room to change while Jungkook continued talking to your parents. Before you got dressed, you asked Jungkook what the style should be, what if it was some expensive beautiful place, so that you didn't come dressed as if you were going to a store. He said that the style could be free, but the clothes should be comfortable. This intrigued you even more.

You put on a gray tight-fitting knit crop top with long sleeves and a rounded neckline. You wore black high-waisted cargo pants with large pockets on the sides. Your skin sometimes showed under top when you moved, but you were going to be in a car and a jacket, so you shouldn't be cold. You left your hair loose, pulling some of it into a half-ponytail at the back of your head and tying it with a gray elastic band so that your bangs wouldn't get in the way. Although the shortest strands did fall out before you went out, it looked good.

After you changed, you went downstairs to the first floor to see Jungkook, who was waiting for you. When he saw you, he looked you up and down. He looked slightly dissatisfied.

"Couldn't you have worn something longer to keep your kidneys warm? It's freezing outside." - Jungkook complained as you were both getting dressed at the door. Your parents supported Jungkook, and you clicked your tongue nervously, ignoring their words. Putting on your Nike winter sneakers and a jacket, you waited for your mom to bring a bag of crab for Jungkook and for Jungkook who instead to get dressed, talking about your top.

"I'll be in a warm car and I'm wearing a jacket so I won't freeze. Stop talking." - You said irritated. Jungkook smiled slyly at you and finally stopped grumbling. Mom brought you the crab, you said goodbye, Jungkook promised to take care of you and bring you home before the new day dawned, and you left the house.

Jungkook arrived in a Gelendvagen. When you saw this car again, you felt delighted. It always evokes such emotions. You remembered the sex you had with Jungkook here and thought that you wouldn't mind doing it again.

Looking at Jungkook, who was starting the engine and pressing something on the dashboard, probably turning on the stove, you thought that this Mercedes suited him very well. Jungkook seems to have been born to drive such a car.

Like this car, he was impressively massive and stable, while combining elegance and strength. The G-Wagon is not just a car, it is a symbol of confidence and power with which it takes to the streets. Jungkook was the same way: he easily attracted attention without trying, with a huge charisma that filled the space around him. And just like this car, his presence always left a feeling of something unusual and even majestic. The Mercedes G-Wagon evokes wonder and a desire to observe, Jungkook was someone who could not be ignored - with his appearance, his energy.

You smiled, they evoke similar emotions in you, the way you thought about it perfectly reflected how you felt about him at that moment.

Jungkook, sensing your view, looked at you. He smiled back at you.

"Why are you smiling?" - He asked as he took off his jacket and threw it into the back seat.

"I was just thinking about something." - You answer, looking at your friend or boyfriend. You didn't know for sure yet. Jungkook has driven away from your house.

"About what?" - He asked. He still had a slight smile on his lips. His eyes were looking at the road. You took a deep breath, enjoying the smell in the car. It smelled like citrus and spices. The smell was completely Jungkook's, you knew he liked citrus notes.

"I thought you were really hot driving that car." - You say leaning over the armrest. You moved closer to get a better look at Jungkook's reaction to your words.

He easily turned away from the empty road where only you were driving and looked at you. His eyes flashed with something devilish and cunning. A half smile graced his alluring lips.

"Are you trying to seduce me as soon as we only just leave your house?" - He asks playfully. You lick your lips, drawing Jungkook's gaze to them. You cast a lazy glance at his crotch. You stretch your lips into a smile and sit up straight, looking in front of you.

"Not at all. I'm just stating a fact." - You say, trying to hold back your laughter. Jungkook continues to drive the car in silence. You don't know where you're going or why. You're going to regret teasing him.

You drive in silence for a while while you check your phone for notifications. You have a text message from Suyong, an instagram notification, a group chat message from your university group, and a bunch of other notifications that you haven't read because you don't feel like it.

Your mind goes back to the conversation you heard, about Jungkook's girlfriend, and you want to talk to him. Your heartbeat instantly speeds up when you're about to ask who you are to each other. But before you dare to ask Jungkook, he is the first to break the silence between you.

"It was great of you to agree to come to Seoul with me right away. I have some urgent business that I have to finish by the 31st, and I can't leave you here alone." - He says, while overtaking the car in front of him.

"Why can't you leave me? Is it because of Doohoon?" - You speculated. Jungkook pressed his lips into a thin line and nodded his head in agreement.

"Yeah. Fuck knows what's in that stupid head of his. He might move on to more sadistic methods." - Jungkook says seriously. He pulls out onto the road that leads to the camping park.

"Why would he start doing something like this?" - You ask, and you remember when you were packing a suitcase to fly to Korea from Niseko, Jungkook arrived at the hotel covered in blood, his hands were beaten. "Did you have a fight? Is that why you came here covered in blood?"

"Yeah. I beat him up." - Jungkook confesses to you. Not that you hadn't guessed, but you were still shocked.

"Badly?" - You ask instead of asking why.

"Yes." - Chunguk answers briefly, without going into details. He recalls Doohoon’s bloody face and thinks that if he hadn't been stopped, he would have killed him. But you don't need to know that.

"Is he even alive?" - You ask ironically. Jungkook hears the irony in your voice and smiles.

"He's alive. Lucky for him." - Jungkook is not joking at all. You burst out laughing.

"Of course it's not funny. You beat him up in front of people?" - You ask, looking at Jungkook. His profile catches your eye. The way he purses his lips, the way his tongue plays with his piercings. How he can easily distract you with just one look.

"No. No one saw us, it was in front of the smoking room. Ha Young called for help. They broke us up. But I kicked his face pretty good." - Jungkook replies.

"Jungkook..." - You breathed out his name worriedly. "You might get in trouble because of that bastard. He's not going to let this go." - You said.

"Let him try, then no one will save him." - Jungkook says, irritated. You can see the muscles in his jaw rippling. You don't say anything, because your mind immediately goes to thoughts of how Jungkook will fight Doohoon. "No one will save you," his words echo in your head. What does that mean? Will he try to 'eliminate' him?

Jungkook notices that you are silent and gives you a quick glance. He meets your worried gaze and rushes to reassure you.

"I'm not going to kill him or torture him. I will deal with them carefully so that you or I don't get hurt." - He promises. You squint your eyes, not quite believing him. "I promise." - He says sincerely. You stare at Jungkook for a long few seconds and finally relax.

"Look. You promised. That asshole isn't worth the trouble he's going to cause. I'm talking about another hassle with police." - Jungkook laughed. You looked at him in surprise. "What did I say that was so funny?" - You were indignant.

"Nothing. I just don't think I'm going to get in trouble with the police." - Jungkook said, sounding amused. "There are more serious things to worry." - You raise your eyebrows and notice that you're pulling up to the checkpoint for the camping park. Jungkook buys a pass, and in a few minutes you're inside the park. It's only a 20-minute walk from your house, and Jungkook gets there in less than 10 minutes. You remember how often you used to go hiking here with your father and Jungkook.

"The police are the law. And what can be more serious than the law?" - You continue the topic. You don't ask why you came to the camping park. The intrigue of your gift is too strong.

"Money." - Jungkook says shortly and parks on a wooden platform. It has a small fence that protects it from the cliff where the river flows. The area is lit by two tall lanterns that emit a yellow, almost orange light. The park is beautiful and cozy. Large caps of snow cover the bare crowns of the trees. The place where Jungkook parks his car is cleared of snow. Does everyone here clean up their parking spaces? Or did Jungkook order it in advance?

"What do you mean? You mean that money can be used to bend the law?" - You ask, simultaneously looking for something that could be your gift. But there is nothing here. Just you, the trees covered in snow, and the sound of the river.

Jungkook finally parks the car, but doesn't turn off the engine. He leaves it running to keep the interior warm. Jungkook smiled slyly. He immediately approached you when he finished parking.

"Yes, baby." - He says in a low purring voice. You look at his handsome face close to yours. "Money is the ultimate law. Whoever has it controls everything." - Jungkook fixes the strands that have fallen out of your hair and are lying on your eyelashes.

"So you have money, so you won't have any problems. Because you'll pay whoever you need to and you won't be punished?" - You ask. At this moment, he looks as much like the mafia as possible. Powerful, self-confident and thinking that the law is not written for him.

"I have money. But it's not just about money. I also have some power. The police are my subordinates whom I can use as I please. They cannot punish or convict me. I control their activities." - To say you are shocked is an understatement. You unconsciously open your mouth at Jungkook's words. It sounds as scary as possible. You look at Jungkook's young face and realize that he has enormous power at his age because he works for a very powerful gangster. If he controls the work of the police, it's just horrible. Does this mean that the police in Seoul are corrupt to the last cop?

"Do you control the work of the police? All of it? But how? They belong to the Ministry of Defense, do you have your own people there too?" - Jungkook looks at your face in silence. You're too beautiful to sit here and ask questions about things you don't need to know. It's time to give you that gift and enjoy your tight pussy.

"I'm not the only one doing this. Taehyung helps me. I've told you enough. Enough about my work. We came here to give you a gift." - Jungkook says. He moves away from you and before he gets out of the car, he says. "Go to the back seat, I have to get it out of the trunk."

You look in Jungkook's wake in surprise. So he confirmed that Taehyung is also a member of the mafia. It's horrible, you thought he was the nicest person in the world. Sometimes appearances can be deceiving.

You get out of the car and sit in the back seat. It's warm in the car, so when you feel like you've played a good game, you take off your jacket and throw it on your front seat. It's much more comfortable now. You wait for Jungkook to come back.

Jungkook gets in the car with you a couple of minutes later. He's holding a black bag with no writing on it. You smile in anticipation of the gift. But you don't understand why you came all the way here. This could have been given to you at home. In fact, he lied. He said there was no gift in the car. But it doesn't matter. If you're here, then Jungkook just wanted to be alone.

Jungkook turns on the lights in the backseat, and then he hands you the package, moving close to you. You take it in your hands and look through it excitedly.

The first thing that catches your eye is a large box. It has an aesthetic design and when you lift it slightly, you realize that it is a set of expensive chocolates from Chocolate Tree. This set is large and has many different flavors, most of all, your attention is drawn to the description of ingredients such as gold plates and aromatic spices. Gosh, eating gold with chocolate? Isn't that too much? But you silently put the chocolate set down and see two more boxes. One is small and the other is a little bigger. They are wrapped in beautiful dark green paper that shimmers in the light.

"Open the smaller one first." - Jungkook asks. You glance at him and notice how close he is. He holds the head sit behind you with his hand, his thigh touching yours.

You listen to Jungkook and take out a smaller box. When you half-open Jungkook's gift, you realize it's a phone. You stare at the box with the latest iPhone pro max in shock, and then look at Jungkook. He raises his eyebrows as if to say, "You don't like it?". You look from Jungkook to the phone.

"Jungkook..." - You finally say. "Isn't it too expensive?" - You are embarrassed. This Athos costs 1200 dollars. That's more than 1.5 million won. He could have presented you something less expensive. But you're thrilled because you've been wanting to change your phone for a long time. You were using the 14th iPhone. You were one of those few Samsung traitors (whose research center was located in your city, by the way) and found iPhones to be user-friendly.

"Do you like it?" - Jungkook asks, trying to figure out if he's got the right gift.

"Do I like it? Yes, I'm crazy about the gift. I've been dreaming of a new phone." - You say enthusiastically. Jungkook smiles happily. A phone is always a good gift. Especially when you once let it slip that you wanted to change it. Jungkook was going to give it to you earlier, but he didn't have time to go buy it. And for Christmas, he had to give it to you. Before you open the box with the iPhone, you give Jungkook a light kiss. You opened the box and looked at the phone. It's big, the color of graphite. You like that Jungkook bought a dark color, because all your phones were either gray or black.

When you saw the phone, you completely forgot that there was another box in the package.

"Baby, there's another present for you." - You smiled guiltily and put the phone on the box of chocolate. You took out a bigger box and started to open it. Jungkook watched you with interest. His eyes were on you, trying to capture every emotion from this gift.

You tore open the gift wrapping. It was a white box with no inscription. You looked at Jungkook, who was smiling slyly, and you didn't understand what was happening. You opened the box and your face instantly turned red. A vibrator. A fucking vibrator that is a complete imitation of a man's penis. It's pale pink and big. You can't tell for sure, but it's about the size of a Jungkook, maybe a little smaller. You feel shyness and a light layer of sweat covers your back. You don't know how to react to this gift.

Jungkook is amused by your reaction. You are frozen in horror and shame at the same time. He leans down to your ear and whispers.

"I thought you should have a toy like this." - Jungkook says. His breath burns your ear. You turn to him, somehow not expecting him to be so close. Although it's obvious, because he was talking in your ear. You stare at his lips. Jungkook smiles seductively. Sparks dance in his eyes.

"How did you even think of that?" - You finally recover from your shock. You close the box with the cock imitator and put it away. You are hot and nervous. Your ears are burning and your palms are cold with excitement. Your hands are shaking. Why did he present it to you? You have Jungkook to help you with your needs. Isn't a vibrator used by women who don't have sexual partners?

Jungkook laughs. His vibrating laughter goes through your whole body. He grabs your hand and pulls you onto his lap. A scream sticks in your throat. Jungkook squeezes your hips with his hands. You feel the pressure of his long fingers.

"Easy. Sex toys are one of the most common things that make sex diverse." - You can't shake the feeling of shame and the sight of the pink vibrator in front of your eyes. "You'll be pleasantly surprised at how much pleasure it can give you." - Jungkook says in a low, soothing voice. He nuzzles your neck with his nose, slowly moving to light kisses. He kisses you with one lip, and you instantly relax. His kisses are soothing, gentle, and exciting at the same time.

"But I have you." - You say with a sigh. If he doesn't stop, you're going to get soaked through. You had sex a few hours ago. Is Jungkook that insatiable? You should admit to yourself that you are the same way. Your desire for Jungkook's touch is at the level of obsession. "You satisfy me completely." - Jungkook stops kissing your neck and looks at you with a dark gaze. You are embarrassed by his gaze and look down at first.

You don't know that you can't be shy in front of Jungkook because he gets off on it. He's excited that you're embarrassed to admit that he satisfies you. He already knew that. Jungkook grabs your face with one hand and turns you around. Your eyes look at him innocently, and he's ready to swallow you whole. He's going to fuck you again, but this time he's going to get enough of you.

Jungkook kisses your lips, skillfully and instantly shoving his tongue into your mouth. He finds yours and flies over them. The kiss is hot, deep, and his lips are ruthless against yours. This kiss makes your head spin. And you can already feel the throbbing in the upper part of your inner thighs. Moisture is soaking your underwear. You have to part your lips because you don't have enough air. Jungkook undoes the button on your pants and guides his hand along the familiar route.

A loud gasp escapes your lips as his finger touches your center. You feel his hard cock already pressing into your ass.

"I'm just going to show you how good it feels. You decide if you want to keep using it or not." - He whispers shrilly. His voice is heavy with excitement. You grip his shoulders until your fingers are white. You're also very horny right now, so if Jungkook wants to show you something new, you don't mind.

"Okay." - You agree. Jungkook smiles. He takes his finger out of your pants and you instantly get upset. His movements only increase the throbbing between your legs. Your clit needed more attention.

He puts his finger in his mouth and sucks your wetness. This gesture is so intimate and makes you even more excited. His smile grows wider when he sees you looking at his fingers in your mouth.

Jungkook pulls you in for another kiss and connects your lips. You can feel yourself on his tongue. He reaches under your top with his hand and realizes that you're not wearing a bra. What luck. He didn't notice it before, maybe because he was distracted by your bare back. He squeezes your breast with his hand and you moan softly into his mouth. His caresses are a pleasure.

Without hesitation, he pulls away from your lips and leans down to take your nipple in his mouth, pulling your top up above your breasts. After the last sex, there are small blue marks on your breasts. He thinks he should kiss you more carefully, because you are already covered with his hickeys. But your skin is so soft and juicy that he can't help but want to savor it to the fullest.

You hiss in pleasant pain when Jungkook first caresses your nipple with his tongue and then bites it. He smiles into your chest and moves on to the other one. You look at this picture of Jungkook sucking on your nipple and you get fired up with a new wave.

When Jungkook has played with your nipples enough, he sits you down next to him. He asks to see your pants and underwear, and then turns off the lights in the backseat. He also reaches for the steering wheel and turns off the headlights, which have been on all along. The light from the street lights is now the only thing that illuminates the interior of the Mercedes. And this light makes the atmosphere between you more comfortable and intimate.

Jungkook follows you and takes off his clothes. His clothes are lying somewhere on the floor and he leaves only his boxers on. You are sitting on the seat completely naked and you are not satisfied with the fact that Jungkook not naked.

When Jungkook wants to pull you closer to him, you move first. You put your hand in front of his head on the seat and put your other hand under his boxers. Now it's your turn to caress him.

You feel that he is wet too. The pre-cum has slipped through the fabric of his underwear and is dripping from the tip of his cock. You run your thumb over the tip, caressing it, and you hear Jungkook sigh in your ear. You turn your head and see the absolute pleasure on his handsome face. He closed his eyes and bit down on his piercing. You're pleased that you're the cause of this pleasure. But you are only stroking him. You should give him more pleasure.

You swirl your tongue around your lips to wet them. You pull Jungkook's cock out of the boxers. It jumps out and hits Jungkook's stomach. You try to pull your boxers down lower and Jungkook lifts his hips slightly to help you do it. When you pull Jungkook's underwear down so that it is no longer in your way, you grab the length of it in your hands and kiss it.

Your lips lightly touch the silky surface of his cock. You wrap your tongue around the tip several times, licking his semen. Jungkook jerks his cock. This shows that he likes it. You think you want to see this reaction with your own eyes. You pull Jungkook's cock out of your mouth. He's watching you carefully.

You take your jacket and throw it at Jungkook's feet. There's enough room in the back of the car for you to kneel in front of him and get comfortable between his legs. So that you have a good view of his face while you suck his cock.

Jungkook understands what you want to do and he doesn't mind at all. He spreads his legs wide and gives you a good opportunity to suck him off.

You kneel down and smile, taking Jungkook's length in your hands. He looks at you with a greedy, eager gaze. His mouth is also curved in a smile. You run your tongue along the vein that runs through his cock. Jungkook exhales heavily, probably holding back a moan. You take his entire length into your mouth and now he can't hold it back. When you pump Jungkook's cock with your mouth just a few times, he moans. You look up and look at him.

He's laid his head back on seat and closed his eyes. His mouth is slightly open. The yogi jaw line seems even sharper from this angle. It’s added him more beautiful.

Saliva curls at the corner of your mouth, and it also runs down your chin. You taste the salty taste of pre-cum. You continue to suck on Jungkook's cock, and with each new movement, you realize that it's getting harder. You touch his balls with your hands, caressing them and squeezing them gently.

Jungkook hisses in pleasure. He looks up and sees you watching him. Your eyes are innocent and your lips are so perfectly wrapped around his cock. No girl has ever looked as sexy and beautiful in his eyes as you. Jungkook smiles at the corner of his mouth and takes your hair.

He pushes your on your neck, squeezing your hair into a tight knot. He pushes his cock deep inside you and can't get enough of the sight.

"You are my dirty slut. You choke on my cock so well." - He says in a low voice and you just flow with these words. They excite you to the max and you feel a sweet ache in your lower abdomen. "These lips are made to suck my cock." - You moan as you continue to pump his length and decide to ease your torment.

You touch your clit with your hand and start to rotate it to come. Jungkook notices what you're doing and raises his eyebrows. He takes you off his cock and leans over to you. You're confused, your chin is covered in saliva mixed with Jungkook's cum.

"Don't touch yourself." - He tells you sternly. "I'm the only one who can touch you." - You are embarrassed by his tone.

Jungkook lifts you. With a deft movement, he sits you back on his lap. Only now you are sitting with your back turned to him. You rest your buttocks on his bare cock. It is wet because you were sucking it a moment ago.

Your friend touches your breasts while kissing your shoulder. He removes the hair that prevents him from accessing your neck and kisses it. He even bites you lightly and you purr in pain and pleasure.

"You are such an impatient baby. Just a little longer and your juicy clit will get the attention it deserves." - Jungkook says in your ear.

"Kook... please...." - You begin to beg him, feeling his cock underneath you, which you dream of him shoving inside you.

"Yes baby… You're begging me, but for what?" - Jungkook spreads your legs wider and touches your swollen clit. You let out something between a sigh and a moan as he begins to caress your clit in a gentle circular motion.

"Fuck me!" - You say. You didn't even think you would have sex for the second time tonight. But it seems you're even more needy now than before.

"Do you want to ride my cock slut?" - Jungkook asks you affectionately. You start moving your hips to feel the friction you need. You smear your cum on Jungkook's cock. This feeling is insane and still unknown to you. It feels so good to feel his hardness in your pussy without swallowing him. Jungkook is breathing heavily somewhere in your ear. He seems to like it as much as you do. He removes his hand from your clit and now holds your thighs to help create a wonderful friction.

You don't know how long, maybe a couple of minutes, maybe one minute of friction between your pussy and Jungkook's length and you'll feel orgasmic. That clit twitches as you continue to rub against the Jungkook's cock. Your long moan fills the space around you and indicates that you have come.

Jungkook laughs lightly, snuggling up to the back of your head. When you stop, he stops moving you too. You take a breath and straighten up in his arms. You turn your head to him and see a smile.

"That was fucking great." - You express your admiration. He reaches for you and connects your lips in a kiss. You return the gentle kiss, which turns into a passionate one as Jungkook uses his tongue with more intensity. It sets you on fire again. God, are you really that insatiable? Or is it just Jungkook who's driving you crazy?

"You didn't think it was over, did you, baby?" - Jungkook purrs against your as he parted lips. You weren't thinking. You weren't thinking about anything at all. Your thoughts are killed by a good orgasm. "It's time to go for a ride." - He says. You don't mind at all. Even though you've had a great orgasm, you want to feel Jungkook's cock filling you up. You'll never get tired of it.

You get up to move when Jungkook stops you. He pushed you back against your hips with his hands. You turn your face to him in confusion.

"You're going to ride like this. You don't need to turn around. Let's try a new angle." - Jungkook explains.

"Okay. But Kook... don't cum in me again." - You ask him. Chunguk doesn't answer. Suddenly you feel a his hand on your throat. Jungkook puts you as close as possible to his strong chest and you feel the joke of his body. He squeezes your throat with a little pressure. Your breathing speeds up, and so does your excitement.

"I'll decide if I want to come in you or on you." - He growls in your ear. Your stomach jumps. That bossy voice, the way he turned it on again. You get a thrill out of it. You know you shouldn't provoke him, but you want to.

"You don't get to decide." - You say. "If I get pregnant, you'll be sorry." - You provoke. Jungkook bites your ear. You whimper.

"You won't get pregnant, baby. Because you're a good girl who takes her medicine. And it looks like you need to buy a course of birth control so I can come inside you every time we have sex." - Jungkook says. God, the thought of him cumming in you, because as he said earlier, "signing you", makes you a little wild.

"So If I'm a good girl, then maybe you'll put me on your cock already?" - You ask with a challenge. Jungkook turns your face around, capturing it with his hand and kissing you uncontrollably. You're so hot between the two of you. It's crazy.

"I'd love to." - Jungkook replies, releasing your face. He lifts you up and you stand on your feet slightly bent over. You feel the tip of his cock pressing against your hole. Jungkook isn't stretching you like he usually does, so despite the wetness, you feel a little uncomfortable. You don't know why, maybe because of the new angle. You bite your lip, and when you fully sit down on the length of the Jungkook, you calm down. The discomfort disappears, giving way to bliss.

Your friend kisses your shoulder as you sit still, getting used to the size. He doesn't rush you, because he realizes that you are not stretched.

"Your tight pussy wraps around my cock so well, doesn't it?" - He whispers in your ear.

"Yes..." - You breathe out. You want to tell him how good it feels, but the sensations you're experiencing down there make you forget how to say it.

The new angle with which Jungkook fills you with his cock makes it seem even more painful. It seems to penetrate right into your stomach. You move your hips to push Jungkook's length out and almost instantly sink down on it. It feels like pure ecstasy. You freeze because your walls are sensitive and they contract. Jungkook is moaning behind you. He feels it too, and he needs to hold back so he doesn't come so fast.

"Fuck..." - He curses. "Fuckin' shit. You're so tight, baby." - It sounds like a compliment. You smile through your pleasure and decide that this compliment is a good incentive to continue. You start moving on Jungkook's hips. The friction is just perfect. You moan loudly and feel your friend squeeze your sides.

While you're chasing your orgasm, riding relentlessly on his lap for a while, Jungkook takes the vibrator out of the box. He turns it on and you hear the noise of vibration. Jungkook puts it against your clit and you seem to lose your head.

The vibration from the dildo spreading across your clitoris creates a feeling of euphoria. As Jungkook moves the vibrator up and down, you're desperately trying not to go crazy. It has never felt so good. After a moment, the knot in your lower abdomen bursts and you moan, stopping moving. The overstimulation is making you disoriented. Jungkook removes the vibrator and grabs you with his hands.

You fall against him, exhausted and breathing heavily. Your head is leaning against his shoulder and you are breathing heavily. Your bodies are sweaty, and the windows in the car behind you are fogged up. You think it's over, but you're sitting on Jungkook's cock, which hasn't come and is still hard inside you.

"Baby, are you okay?" - He asks. You purr to confirm that you're fine. You just don't have the strength anymore. But you realize that Junguk didn't have his orgasm, and you don't know what to do. "Get up and lie down on the seat." - He says. You struggle to get up, and you and Jungkook switch places. You lie down on the seat, almost resting your head against the door. Jungkook is hanging over you and you notice how hard and needy his cock is. He's going to fuck you lying down, it'll even be more comfortable for both of you.

When Jungkook enters you for the second time, he slides into you almost perfectly. As usual, he rocks his hips to find the right angle and starts to drive his cock into you with slow, deep strokes. You put your arms around his shoulders. You put one hand in his silk hair and enjoyed the way he skillfully fucked you.

Jungkook's movements were slow, driving his cock deep into you as if he was enjoying every stroke. You moaned into his ear. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, burning you with his breath. This moment seemed so loving. He was fucking you so gently but passionately at the same time. And you could feel Jungkook's thrusts making you feel an orgasm building up.

"Please, Kook..." - You exhale, urging him to give you a third orgasm during this sex. He lifts his head and kisses you. Your tongues dance together as if made for a perfect tandem. You see him accelerate his hips and you come on Jungkook's cock three times in half a minute.

You moan loudly and long, squeezing the length with your walls. Jungkook is chasing his own orgasm, slamming into you quickly, prolonging your pleasure. He comes inside you. Not because he wanted to, as he said before. He didn't have time again. Or did he really not want to?

You feel his cum filling you. You're not surprised anymore. Just don't let God get you pregnant. You're compelled to buy a course of birth control pills.

Jungkook crushes you with his muscular body. You are both breathing heavily and exhausted. Jungkook softens inside you and you lower the legs he was holding and put them on the sides of Jungkook's body. You lie there for a while to recuperate.

Jungkook is the first to move. He smiles at you when you open your eyes.

"Are you alive?" - Jungkook asks. He's sorry you look tired. But he enjoyed having sex with you. It doesn't matter that it's the second time you've had sex since the big quarrel in Japan.

"I'm alive." - You answer with a tired smile. Jungkook finally pulls out of you. He gives you some tissues so you can clean yourself up. He also uses them and gets dressed. When you are dressed too, you decide what to do next. Jungkook could take you home to rest, but he wants to stay with you as long as possible. You go to the city center and buy coffee.

You suggested going for a walk in the park by the lake and Jungkook agreed. He was a little angry at the way you were dressed, so you quickly reassured him off. There's no need to worry, you're not cold.

You wanted to finally talk about your relationship. Because you needed to finally know who you were to each other.

"Jungkook-ah." - You called out to him as you walked silently hand in hand along the alley along the lake.

"What, baby?" - He replied.

"Can I ask you something?" - You asked, feeling your heart speed up.

"Of course. Ask." - Jungkook replied.

"This might be a very rude thing to ask... I just want to clarify..." - You tried to find the right words for both of you. Jungkook stopped. Your nervousness is transmitted on him. His heart was beating faster too, but it wasn't as frantic as yours. He sees that you intend to ask about something important.

"Speak directly. What do you want to know." - Jungkook said impatiently. You looked at him in confusion.

"I just wanted to know who we are now. Are we still friends...?" - You were about to ask "is there anything more" but Jungkook beat you to it.

"Yes, we're still friends." - He answered too quickly. You froze and then smiled in disappointment. Of course you're not going to be his girlfriend. Why did you ever think he would want to go out with you?

"Okay��whatever." - You said dryly with a hint of disappointment in your voice. Letting go of his hand, you threw the glass of finished coffee into the trash and walked on, leaving him behind. Jungkook smiled at you as you walked away. He realized that you were going to ask not only about friendship.

He also threw the glass in the trash and caught up with you. He turned you to him, pulling you by the waist. You looked at him indifferently.

"I guess you had something else you wanted to ask me?" - Jungkook said, smiling at you. You held back your smile as best you could.

"No. Not anymore." - You said offensively, turning your head away. He used his hand to bring your gaze back to his face and kissed you. You instantly melted from this tender loving kiss with a cappuccino flavor.

"Go ahead baby, you can ask me anything." - Jungkook said. You smiled shyly.

"I was going to ask if we're still friends or more?" - You finally decided. Jungkook was expecting you to ask that. It's obvious to him that you've been a couple for a long time. He's got some pressures about it, but he can handle them. You, on the other hand, seem to need official confirmation.

"How would you like it?" - He replies with a question to a question. You can hear your heart pounding in my ears.

"I like you." - You confess. Jungkook freezes. These words you say have been his goal for years, and after all this time, you say it. Jungkook kisses you on the lips without warning. You raise your eyebrows, not expecting him to attack you like that. Jungkook took both hands to your face, and you reflexively grabbed his elbows. You gently squeezed the fabric of his jacket. The kiss deepened. Your lips moved slowly, but you could feel the growing passion with each new touch. He was warm and viscous, like honey, and at the same time awakened a hot wave in your chest that rolled from your heart to your fingertips. Your breath mingled with his, making it feel as if the whole world had narrowed down to this moment, to this touch.

"I like you too, baby." - Jungkook confessed to you as he enjoyed kissing you. You smile, your heart flutters, and your stomach is full of butterflies. "I've liked you for so long. Besides you've been mine for a long time." - He says as he nibbles on your lips. It seems like something unreal, something that would never happen for you. But here you are, confessing your love for each other.

You kiss again until you are interrupted by Jungkook's phone ringing. It's quite late, who could be calling him at this hour? Jungkook reluctantly pulls away from your sweet lips and takes the phone out of his pocket. You see the name "Jimin" in time to see it.

"Yeah, buddy." - Jungkook says as he picks up the phone.

"Hey, kid. Where are you?" - You hear Jimin's voice. There are no people around you and the park is quiet at this hour, so you can hear what he's saying clearly.

"I went to Suwon." - Jungkook replies calmly, looking at you. The two of you are still in an embrace.

"Put up with Y/N?" - Jimin asks.

"Yes." - Jungkook says shortly.

"So did you make up with her well? Like a real man?" - Jimin continues his interrogation playfully. Jungkook snorts into the phone. You laugh quietly, too. Oh that Jimin. He was always trying to matchmake you two.

"We made up." - Jungkook just says. "Why are you calling? To ask about it?" - Jimin is tensely silent for a while, and then answers.

"Kid... I tried to hide it as best I could, but I got caught up in it too... Namjoon found out about the devices. He wants to see you." - You felt everything inside you tighten into a tight knot. Jungkook's brows drew together and his black eyes darted between yours. You couldn't read what he was feeling on his face, but he seemed upset and very angry.

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[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello, I came to say that dragons are mythical creatures often depicted to be possessive in mythology and literature, sometimes known for their immense power, territorial instincts, and the symbolic association with hoarding wealth and treasures...

Twisted Wonderland in context, Malleus Draconia was confirmed to be a dragon fairy (essentially a dragon who can take a shape of a man), and I was curious if Malleus may have exhibited possessive traits in canon, whether through main story or vignette...?

The reason I ask that is because mischaracterizing characters or making them OOC is the last thing I want to do when it comes to writing or analyzing...

**Sorry if I was not able to word it in a way that you can understand what I'm trying to convey because sometimes I feel inferior that my wording may come off as blunt or insensitive. I just want to leave a brief note that I don't mean to come off as rude or dismissive. I appreciate your understanding!**

In my opinion, Malleus in canon is protective but not possessive. What do I mean by that? Glad you asked. Let's start by laying down some definitions.

In this situation, when I say “protective”, it implies good intentions. It means actively looking out for others' safety and wellbeing. To be possessive, on the other hand, implies a more controlling desire to own or to restrict another's actions. It’s commanding and demanding all of a person’s attention and love. It means having a disrespect for others' autonomy and instead trying to displace it with your will. (Yes, I know that you're probably automatically thinking of The Big Exception of book 7, but I will address that later in this post so hang on for a moment!)

This gets long, so buckle up! We’ve got a lot to talk about.

First thing's first, a lot of the "possessive Malleus" interpretations originate from fandom, especially when it comes to yandere, yume, or generally romantic fan works. (And to be clear: This is NOT to shame the folks who enjoy these kinds of works; I am only listing them here as examples.) Oftentimes this occurs due to individual fans bringing in ideas from media outside the bounds of Twisted Wonderland. This is totally expected and normal; there is no such thing as someone who has an interest in ONLY a singular thing. We will naturally apply our previous knowledge to help us understand and interpret new information.

For example, in irl mythology, fae are hurt by iron--and even in Disney's own films, such as Maleficent, iron is depicted as harming fae and sapping them of their power. This led to many Twst fans headcanoning that iron does the same thing to fae in Twisted Wonderland. However, we learn in book 7 that this is NOT true. Fae, particularly nobles, do find the smell of iron nauseating, but the metal does not appear to impede their powers or hinder them in any way. Lilia and his men are still able to dispatch several Silver Owls (who are dressed in iron arm and battle with iron tanks and other machinery) without issue.

Another example that’s pretty popular is fans believing that whole “if you tell a fairy your name, it grants them power over you” thing. Some have claimed this will come into play in book 7’s final battle. Others claim this is the deeper or secondary reason as to why Malleus doesn’t reveal his own name to Yuu until book 5, as giving his name would grant Yuu power over him. However, there’s nothing in-universe to suggest that names have cultural significance to fae or that any sort of power or status is granted by relinquishing one’s name. Yuu (or Malleus’s hundreds of other classmates) have also demonstrated no such control over him.

Remember: what is true outside of Twst, including in Disney's own works, is NOT necessarily true inside of Twst.

Going back to the initial question, I believe that "Malleus is possessive" is also a headcanon of a similar vein; fans are coming into Twst familiar with other mythos which state that dragons are possessive, territorial, and greedy on top of being powerful. Because Malleus is a dragon fae and is known to possess great power, it's very easy for fans to see the parallels between him and the dragons they already know of. This then leads to them filling in the gaps of his personality and projecting other stereotypical draconic traits onto him. In Malleus's case, this was extremely easy to do because it took a few years for him to see any significant spotlight in both event stories (Glorious Masquerade) and in the main story (book 7).

I think the easiest way for us to analyze whether Malleus is protective or possessive is to examine his closest relationships in the narrative of Twst. I will not be counting Sebek and Silver individually here, as they are both his bodyguards and Malleus maintains a mostly professional relationship with them. Instead, we shall look at Malleus's attitude by looking at his relationships with Lilia and Yuu, then proceed into discussing related behaviors.

I believe it's indisputable that Lilia is one of the most important people to Malleus. Lilia trained him, taught him, and trained him. He is basically Malleus's father figure. The fear of losing Lilia is what causes Malleus to emotionally spiral and take drastic measures in a desperate attempt to avoid that unhappy ending. His entire motivation for unleashing his UM is "not losing [Lilia]!" You would think that if Malleus was going to be possessive of anyone, it would be with Lilia. But the truth of the matter is... he's mostly just... not? Lilia is a very sociable person in the student body. He's frequently gaming with Idia, taking care of or lending wisdom to others (Silver, Sebek, etc.), hanging out with Cater and Kalim in their club, interacting with dorm leaders and freshmen when Malleus is absent for ceremonies, and more--yet Malleus doesn't seem to express any jealousy over sharing Lilia. I'd also like to add that although Malleus lacks parents, he doesn't really show envy over Lilia treating and calling Silver his own son instead of himself. Oh, Malleus certainly does express jealousy to some extent. Who would forget the time in his Dorm Uniform vignettes when he crushed Lilia's phone? The thing is though, the times when Malleus is upset are not fueled by not wanting to share Lilia or wanting to monopolize his time. In the previous example I cited, Malleus broke Lilia's phone because Lilia had received a picture Kalim and the other dorm leaders took after a meeting. Even the dialogue exchanged implies this; Malleus did not automatically get mad when he noticed that Lilia had a notification, he only got mad after realizing he was excluded from something the other dorm leaders were all involved in. Malleus was upset that he was not invited, not that Kalim was texting Lilia. Additionally, it is stated that the dorm leader must grant permission for others to use the lounge. If he wanted to, he could withhold the permission for Lilia, who wants the lounge for his farewell party (which everyone is invited to), or stipulate that he wants a more formal affair with just Diasomnia members present. Malleus doesn’t act in this possessive way though. He grants Lilia what he desires without issue.

Next up for scrutiny is Yuu! Now, there's some gray area here because part of Yuu's relationship with Malleus is defined by how much the player projects onto the self-insert/blank slate character. Please note that, when I discuss Yuu, I am leaving out individual interpretations and going STRICTLY by the information presenting in canon.

It can be said that Malleus slowly develops a fondness for Yuu's company over the course of the main story. At first, he is surprised and maybe even a little disappointed that someone has taken residence in Ramshackle--it used to be desolate, which makes it a perfect spot to visit on his nightly strolls. However, Malleus soon finds amusement in the fact that Yuu, not being of this world, has no clue who he is or what his status is. This grants him the freedom to speak at ease with this human and to "be himself" in a way that he cannot be with others, who typically cower at his name. You could also argue that Yuu telling Malleus they may have found a way home expedited the despair he felt in book 7, as he learned so quickly that two of his friends would be exiting his life soon. This, however, is not possessiveness. It's normal to have fear and anxiety about losing the people you love.

Malleus's voice lines also do not indicate possessiveness. Yes, there's the usual and expected fanservice-y lines where he invites Yuu to come and engage in various activities with him, but nothing in those suggests he would exclude others or become upset if they also wanted to join. (Are you telling me that Malleus wouldn't want to talk for hours on end about the glory of gargoyles to TWO people instead of just one?????) Additionally, all the characters get similar fanservice-y lines, so it's not something exclusive to Malleus. There was one line that gave me pause: "You always seem to attract a crowd... More so than I'd like, really." Buuut I think this could be read a number of ways, not solely in an ‘I want you all to myself’ way. Malleus actually goes like to be alone, hence his nightly strolls. The line can therefore also be read as Malleus enjoying solitude or one-on-one conversations as opposed to addressing a group. In that case, it's a personal preference and not necessarily a sign of possessiveness. He’s definitely not completely averse to group activities though; there are lines where Malleus invites Yuu to do things with him and other characters. For example, from his PE Uniform: “Sebek has been badgering me to help train him. I'll permit you to join us. ... You're coming, I trust?”

The guy generally doesn't get angry or annoyed if Yuu mentions having other friends or managing the 7 member VDC/SDC group. In fact, he sometimes encourages Yuu to interact with others. One of his birthday lines is, "You needn't linger and focus on me to the exclusion of others. I want everyone to enjoy the party, yourself included." Malleus doesn’t so much as flinch or react when a complete stranger kisses the back of Yuu’s hand either. If he was truly possessive, wouldn’t he have gotten angry or—at the very least—have frowned or tried to put some distance between Yuu and said stranger? Yet Malleus doesn’t really react or comment on it despite being present.

Malleus seems to understand that it's not very polite to demand all of someone's time or attention--and this makes perfect sense of his character. He is a royal, and that means he was taught proper manners. Malleus has even indicated before that his grandmother stressed the importance of observing etiquette, particularly around invitations. You don't just invite yourself to functions or insert yourself into others' lives if not extended said invites... and Malleus, for the most part, adheres to those rules. In various voice lines, he even frets over committing social faux pas, wondering if he has offended his peers with certain behaviors. For example, from his Masquerade Dress: "Flamme shoots me stern looks on occasion. Have I behaved improperly in some way...?"

Malleus is also not generally possessive when it comes to his items or territory. He wants to share cake with others; eating a whole one gave him heartburn and now whole cakes are his least favorite food. Additionally, he tends to welcome people to Diasomnia rather than chase them out or expel them. (After all, they so rarely get visitors in the first place.) Malleus will at least hear out the reasoning for seeking him out. As an example, Leona (someone who has had a rocky history with Malleus) goes to Diasomnia in his Ceremonial Robes vignettes to exchange robes after a laundry mix-up. This is a stark contrast to the highly territorial Leona, who attacks a magicless human in thd Botanical Garden and also allows his own students to wail on Yuu and co. for simply walking being in Savanaclaw. Leona joins in on this bullying too. I think it's pretty clear that Malleus handles guests with far more tact, grace, and patience than his fellow prince.

I want to point out that though Malleus is usually amicable with guests, there are exceptions. Ramshackle, as I mentioned earlier, is a place he enjoys a lot. He indicates in his Halloween Dress card that “If anyone dares to damage [this] dorm, I will be as a lóng and reduce them to cinders. I have become rather fond of that place, after all.” Indeed, he does act on this promise in Terror is Trending and comes close to striking down Magicam Monsters for disrespecting a place he holds so dear. Is this possessive though? Yes, it’s a place he loves—but it’s also a place where his friend Yuu lives.

There are many other examples of Malleus going to extreme lengths to protect the things he loves. He vows to destroy Rollo Flamme, who poses a threat to his people, the fae (who depend on magic as their way of life, and the sentient gargoyles, whom he has recently befriended. He unleashes his mighty magic to attack those who wound his pride. He stops time and kidnaps the entire student body all for the sake of including ghosts in a Halloween celebration. And, of course, he sends Sage’s Island to sleep in a desperate bid to stop losing everyone. The majority of these behaviors involve him lashing out at those who pose legitimate threats to things he cares about. It’s not as though be is acting for no discernible reason or because he is doesn’t want his loved ones being with people other than him. Does that make these actions right? No, absolutely not. But I would say they are definitely more protective than possessive.

Very rarely is Malleus actively preventing his peers from spending time away from him. Sure, he gets upset that he’s not invited to join them and sure, he wishes people would invite him too—but there’s a difference between longing and being mopey about this and acting so domineering he’s breathing down the necks of others to only be with him. He is not stopping people from being with their friends and family. He is not stopping people from using his things or entering his territory. Even when he makes everyone sleep, he grants them the space to craft their own dreams and doesn’t even make the dreams center around him and his own involvement on their lives. Oftentimes the dreams involve several other characters that are important to the individual dreamer and Malleus does not appear at all. (Again, this doesn’t mean using his UM was the best move to resolve his issues; I’m just saying his actions were not necessarily possessive.)

So, in conclusion, I stand by the thesis at I proposed at the start of this post: Malleus is largely protective, not possessive, despite what many fandom interpretations would have you believe.

[pells-beautiful-wife]

Period head canons 🩸🤕

law, pell, penguin, sanji, doflamingo, robin, zoro

How one piece characters treat you on your period

If you want other characters I am happy to write for a bunch more I'm just doing my favourites rn <3

AN, I'm on my period rn and oh lord I am not having a good time 😢 really need some head canons rn

(happy new year)

Trafalgar Law

Sfw

~ knows your cycle off by heart

~ prepares for everything, the mood swings, if you get cramps, extra pads/tampons/menstrual cups in every bathroom, if you can name it he's got it

~ would still expect you to do some work unless your cramps are bad, although even if they aren't it would be less work then usual

~ has every pain relief method under the sun and some that aren't, he's got special teas, heat pads, ice packs, pain medication, a list of exercises, everything

nsfw

~ would still have sex during your period but only as pain relief

~ it's also not spontaneous, it's usually in the shower because he does not want to clean cum and blood off the floor/bed

~ does not go down on you even if he kinda wants to just a little, he will definitely finger you tho and let's you suck him off but won't fuck you on his dick, he doesn't wanna hurt you (unless you like it, if you do he's got you pressed against the glass wall of the shower pounding you so hard you feel like your gonna split open)

~ might ask you for something in return every now and then but avoids asking when your on your period

Pell the falcon

sfw

~ cuddles you a lot and definitely gives you massages

~ takes time off work to look after you if your having a really shitty day and definitely doesn't expect you to do any work

~ makes you tea and always refills hot water bottles, will also have ice packs in the freezer though, and definitely takes you out on a date at some point, unless you don't feel like it, in that case he gets dressed up nice and cooks you your favourite meal

~ expect princess treatment and you will not be disappointed

Nsfw

~ absolutely would not ask for it, this man rarely does, but he definitely quadruple checks with you if you ask him for it

~ goes slower than usual, definitely checking if your okay regularly

~ nothing kinky or outrages, keeps it simple and cleans up afterwards, he doesn't mind if you make a mess he just makes sure your not bloodying anything expensive

~ wouldn't go down on you but would finger you and would make love with you (he's gentle and sweet this ain't sex it's worship) he wouldn't let you give him head though

Penguin

sfw

~ very sweet

~ he doesn't have much period knowledge but if you ask him for something he does everything he can to get it for you

~ definitely showers you with kisses and affection and probably gets made fun of by Shachi

~ he's the kinda of guy to fall for the internet prank where you ask him for something completely made up and he believes you and tries very hard to find it only to be told it doesn't exist

Nsfw

~ he's okay with whatever your okay with although won't go down on you that's his main thing he won't do, he also refuses to hurt you even if you like it

~ would ask for it but only if he was pretty horny if not he's fine with taking care of himself

~ loves it when you give him head, in fact he might prefer it to almost anything else (other then you sitting on his face but that's for a different set of head canons)

Black leg Sanji

sfw

~ princess treatment

~ won't let you lift a finger

~ he'll make anything you request, no matter the hour or the difficulty

~ knows a lot about periods but not everything and is a little clueless when it comes to flow but knows a lot of foods to make you feel better

nsfw

~ anything to please you, literally anything

~ very wary about sex though, he doesn't want to hurt you, he probably does it anyway and doesn't regret it

~ although he is super not sure if you ask him to eat you out, he will and although it's not his favourite thing he'll do it if you ask

~ he also won't ask for this but please suck him off he craves it

Donquixote doflamingo

sfw

~ acts like he doesn't give a shit

~ convinces himself he doesn't give a shit

~ but if you mention you need anything he will at first tell you womp womp but a servant will appear at you door with exactly what you need as soon as he leaves

~ will deny he does this but he is a lot sweeter to you and gives you small gifts

Nsfw

~ oh you though he wasn't gonna fuck you cause your on your period yeah sorry honey no

~ acts like there isn't blood pouring out of you onto the sheets...

until he sees it embarrasses you then he will absolutely tease you about it, just completely degrade you

~ fucks you like usual rough and doesn't stop till your sobbing

~ we all know this man doesn't believe in aftercare but on your period he will stay for a little while longer maybe caress your hair for a second and instead of the rushed toothy sloppy kiss he usually gives you when he leaves he'll kiss you softly on the cheek and say "sleep well mi amor" but he'll say it so softly you'll question if you even heard it

Nico Robin

sfw

~ reads stories to you whilst you cuddle and she massages your abdomen

~ definitely makes you tea

~ brings you small gifts and trinkets she thought you'd like

~ do not hide emotions from her she can read you like a ponglyph and definitely lets you cry into her if your upset over nothing she doesn't judge

Nsfw

~ absolutely destroys you on her fingers

~ 50/50 on going down on you depends on her mood (we all now robin is a little freak let's be real)

~ does expect you to do her afterwards tho unless your really crampy

Roronoa Zoro

sfw

~ naps with you all the time but it doubles when your on your period

~ keeps you close at all times he is super protective and if you are the slightest bit in pain he is going straight to Nami and robin for help

~ he knows almost nothing about periods and it definitely bothers him, it makes him feel bad that he can't help you on your period so you can be sure after your first period when your together he will be researching afterwards

Nsfw

~ definitely eats you out, doesn't give a flying fuck that there is blood dripping out of you and down his face, in fact he likes it better that way, not that he'll tell you that

~ probably won't use his dick tho because he notices how overly sensitive you are down there and he is girthy,

~ he will be more gentle with you but he makes up for it once you stopped you period and fucks you harder than usual

[nothing-in-the-ordinary]

"Rhysand reminds me of my Ex."

Is the comment that changed my mind about this series. See, I'd given my copy to my middle sister, Bekka, who loves DnD like me. She loved the first book, could not stop gushing about how cool Prythian sounds with all the different courts (she wants to live in Winter lol).

But then the books continued. She told me, halfway though Silver Flames, that she can't do it anymore. She can't read a story where the main character goes through the same or eerily similar abuses that /she/ suffered from her ex. At first I said, don't worry girl Tamlin doesn't show up much anymore. Her response?

"Tamlin isn't the problem, Rhys is! He's just like Ben."

Ben, for context, is her ex-fiancee. An alcoholic who would get black out drunk frequently, harassing and physically assaulting people is this state. He'd start fights in bars just because he could. He's been arrested for this 4 times, that ive seen, it's likely higher.

He controlled nearly everything she did. From when she went, to how she dressed. From what she ate, to the people she talked to. He almost completely isolated her from her family. Out of all of us, I was the only one still in contact. Likely because as the youngest of my siblings, I posed the least threat to his control. Our parents and oldest sister were cut off.

He was violently abusive. Bekka called us from the hospital on 3 separate occasions. The first time he'd shoved her down a flight of stairs at their apartment during an 'arguement' about bills. Then it was when he'd beat her and broken her arm for 'disrespecting his authority as a man', whatever that means. Finally, it was the car crash. He was road raging against another driver, speeding and swerving on the interstate. The crash totaled her car, and other drivers, and a third car that was also struck. It was then that she finally was convinced to leave.

Because that's the thing about manipulation. It's subtle, and it's effective. This man took years of her life, making her suffer all the way, and she stayed because he was clever and charming when he wanted to be. He'd convinced her that /we/ her family were the controlling ones, we were the ones trying to break them apart when he loved her so much.

10 years. 10 goddamn years! She lost 10 mother fucking years to that monster! Even more if you count the PTSD she still sees a therapist for. And it's not like leaving was easy. He refused to let her leave peacefully so we had to get the law involved. A mountain of evidence, a court hearing, and one horrified judge later, Bekka now has a permanent restraining order on the bastard.

All in all, people stan who they want to stan. I'm just asking, begging, pleading, with you to understand that characters like Rhysand are made real in people like Ben.

*i posted this with permission from Bekka to explain her story. she is healthy and happy now with a man who truly loves her.*

[cripplecharacters]

Debated on whether I wanted to resend but here goes nothing.

This is Margo, my OC. She is currently being developed into a Stardew Valley mod. I don't wish to spoil too much, but she fought in The War and was injured. She now has facial + body scarring and a cane. I'm still writing the story, but so far, she has two plots: A, which is her learning to open up and accept the player. And B, which is her trying to find a hobby with the help of other NPC characters.

I'm mainly sending an ask in for feedback on her design. As of now, her torn lip has been edited to show her gums instead of all teeth. Otherwise, nothing has changed. Thank you!

Side question: How should her facial difference and cane be addressed, if at all?

[Image description: two pixel drawings. The first one shows the full body of the character; she has light tan skin, a burn scar on her face, and long red hair. She's holding a cane. The second drawing shows multiple versions of the character's portrait with various facial expressions.]

Hey!

She looks good! I especially like the top right one, very cute :)

I think my only concern would be re: her right eye - is she meant to have corneal scarring or a traumatic cataract? I'm asking since it looks like she has corneal blindness, but that's rarely caused by an injury like that (it's mostly a vitamin deficiency/parasitic thing). It's not impossible that she'd have it from a burn, but I want to make sure you're not confusing the two (since I see that a lot) and these two conditions do have different symptoms (outside of blindness).

If you're willing to address her disability then I think it would be a good idea. I'm not sure what kind of narration you're going for, but it wouldn't be ableist for the player character to simply Acknowledge that she has burns on her face (e.g., before the player learns her actual name, the placeholder could be "red-haired woman with a burn" since these are just her most visible characteristics). It also wouldn't be out of place if the player character wondered "what happened" - I know we (disabled people) all hate this question, but I don't think it's weird for someone to just think that in their head when they see someone (thought crime isn't real, etc.). As long as the player character isn't going around harassing her asking why she's disabled as the first thing they do (unless I guess it'd be to show that the player is ableist and has a lot to learn?) it should be ok.

If you want the characters to discuss "what happened" in the actual dialogue, it'd be preferably after they actually develop a relationship. I don't think it's weird to ask one's friend about their disability (as opposed to demand that information). Depending on Margo's personality and/or feelings toward the player she could either explain the whole story in great detail, leave it at "during the War, a building caught on fire, I was in it; it took them three months to put me back together but at least I'm finally back home, isn't modern medicine incredible?", or simply decline to answer that. All three are valid options; it's not like her character arc will fall apart if the player doesn't know what happened. She's visibly a burn survivor, there's hardly any mystery as to what's going on. Not everyone wants to talk about the origin of their disability, even (sometimes especially) to people they're close to - sometimes it's PTSD, sometimes it's the fact that they're tired of being asked that.

Her cane is more straightforward since in her case, her main "thing to address" are her burns and the cane would probably fall under that for most players. If you want you can have the player character compliment the design of her cane* or how well built it is, especially earlier on when it would be more awkward to just go straight to discussing her actual disability.

*Real life (not writing) tip: Not everyone likes that, please don't randomly compliment real strangers' mobility aids, especially if they're undecorated or without anything else that would imply they want to bring attention to it. A lot of people (myself included) will think you're being condescending.

Other than that, there's no reason to ignore her burns or cane; e.g. if the player visits her at home before going out she can mention that she needs to grab her cane, or put a pressure sleeve on before leaving, maybe on some days she's not available to talk to because she has physical therapy scheduled at that time, etc. As long as she has other character traits that have nothing to do with her disability (which it sounds like she already does) it should all be good.

I also like the plot B she's involved in - I wish this wasn't the case, but so many characters with facial differences don't have any damn hobbies ("obsessing over revenge for making them disabled" doesn't count) and almost never seem to have casual friends, so this is cool to see!

Hope this helps,

mod Sasza

[thefandomenchantress]

General Thoughts About Eden's Garden

I have, at long last, finished chapter one of Eden's Garden. And I really liked it! While it wasn't perfect, I still really enjoyed playing it and am very glad I got to experience it. Since I wasn't around for the Another fangames, this is the first time I've been able to keep up with a project like this as it's coming out, and it's been really cool.

So, without further ado, let's get started! Project Eden's Garden spoilers below. :)

I'll start with my criticisms, since I don't have a lot of them. Honestly, my biggest complaint has to be the technical issues I faced while trying to play this game instead of watching it. But I'm not going to sit here and pretend making a game is easy by any means, so I don't really hold that against the game, even if it was frustrating.

Plus, I'm an idiot. I sat for like half an hour trying to figure out the Non-Stop debate controls and thinking my WASD thingy was malfunctioning and not letting me switch truth bullets, when there was only one truth bullet I was allowed to use at the time. I was just being stupid and not catching on when it only showed me one truth bullet in the corner, haha. The repeated crashing of my game, however, wasn't my fault. But I was able to get my hands on a work-in-progress low-spec version of the game that stopped most of the crashing and stuff! After that, most issues went away, except for after the trial ended and the after-trial dialog wouldn't pop up, leaving me on a black screen even after a restarted my computer and tried a few more times. But I'm not too unhappy about that, it's not like I was missing any riveting gameplay sections, haha. I could just watch the YouTube version of the execution and stuff.

Other than those technical difficulties on my end, there are only a few actual problems I had with the gameplay, haha. The first being that I am terrible at bullet hell-styled gameplay, apparently, and Argument Altercation kicked my ass in normal mode. I really wish there was a way to switch your difficulty on that, or maybe checkpoints, because after about thirty or more tries of not being able to get past stage three, I gave up and ended up just getting my hands on a save file from after the minigame. I may love videogames, but that does not mean I'm good at them, haha.

As for the actual writing, I don't have too many complaints...I suppose if I had to say something, though, it'd be that some of the characters felt like they didn't have enough to do this chapter. Ulysses is probably the main one I felt this applied to, even if I love him, he didn't give us too much this chapter, other than a lore drop during the pharmacy investigation (His limited screentime didn't stop me from growing attached to him, though haha). Other characters, despite getting a little more screentime, felt like they didn't really develop at all in the grand scheme of things. But I don't want to focus in on this too much, since it's only chapter one and most characters usually don't start having any big changes until a murder occurs. And the disproportional screentime may just be the writing style of Eden's Garden being that they focus on a certain group of characters each chapter, when they have the most relevance. Wenona, for example, feels like she's being set up to be a larger player down the line, even if she wasn't a super major character this chapter.

There was a lot more I liked about the chapter than disliked, though! All the characters really grew on me, for the most part. Well...Almost everyone. There is one character who I'm kinda meh on right now, since I'm not quite sure what they're going for yet. He's entertaining, I like him fine, but he's not quite on the same level as everyone else. And that character is:

Jett.

Honestly, I think the main reason I'm having trouble is just how he treats Toshiko.

Jett, why are you picking on a literal child??? What are you doing??? This wouldn't bother me if I knew an explanation for it that gives cool insight into his character, but as is I'm just kinda annoyed at him for it. Then again, I haven't bothered to experience any of his FTEs yet, so it's possible he gives some sort of explanation for his child-belittling ways there, haha.

The Mark and Jett thing was fine, I'm liking the set-up there. I think the only difference that makes me like the Jett and Mark stuff over the Jett and Toshiko stuff is that Damon actually calls Jett out for not respecting Mark's boundaries, meanwhile no one really reprimands him for belittling Toshiko because of her age. When he shares her blackmail, no one says "Hey, man, that wasn't very cool of you." They just shrug Toshiko's blackmail off and say no one should share anything else. Wolfgang even calls her blackmail a "joke". No wonder Toshiko is so desperate to be respected, everyone but Ingrid is so rude to her (I can forgive Grace, though, because the gremlin bit was the funniest thing in the prologue to me).

Of course, if they end up calling out his behavior towards her later, as well as everyone else's, I'll be happy and probably end up liking him more. His whole never taking off his helmet thing is pretty cool, I'm interested to see where that goes and to see any character development he has. And him and Cassidy's little friendship being established through gaming was fun.

...Writing all this out actually made me appreciate Jett a little more, since I don't think I would be able to say this much about some of the other characters...I mean if I felt something other than passive enjoyment maybe they’re doing something right…

Oh, right, there were other characters this chapter. Let's get onto them!

Damon was just as entertaining as last time, I'm excited to see what happens next with him. Him letting Diana defend herself made it seem like he was going to be more empathic to others and improve, but Eva betraying him might mean he starts trusting the others even less than before.

In daily life, Eva...Might've been my favorite. Don't get me wrong, Kai is still my favorite character overall, but I loved Eva in daily life so much. Her "Bweh..." and "Raaaage..." voicelines are some of my favorites in any fangan and I'm happy I experienced all her FTEs. I loved her in daily life, deadly life was...Still fine and good, the execution was super well-animated and cool. But her being the culprit did sort of undercut my enjoyment a little, since it sort of calls into question the truthfulness of certain aspects of her character that made me like her. Still really cool, though.

Kai was great. I'm going to make a post dedicated to him later, where I'm sure I'll ramble on and on for a while, so for now I'll keep it brief. He was just as funny as last time, surprisingly helpful in the class trial, his large amount of screentime was a pleasant surprise to me, I'm super excited to see if he'll be the new support, and his FTEs were really cool. I'm super hyped to ramble about everything concerning him later.

Ulysses, despite his limited screentime, managed to be pretty charming this time around. Him already telling backstory stuff to us makes me a little worried for if he'll die soon, but oh well. Him literally saying "um, actually" when he starts his objection was great. Toshiko calling him ugly in...the Prologue, I think(?), was blatantly incorrect because I really like his design. There's something about his color scheme that I enjoy, idk. Plus, owls are my favorite animal, so I was pretty much guaranteed to like his theming.

Diana being heavily suspected by the fanbase and then being suspected in-universe in the trial was cool, the whole "choose the culprit" minigame legitimately tricked me into thinking it was her for a hot minute...Until I remembered how much unused evidence we had, haha. Excited to see where she goes from here.

Wolfgang...Damn those sprites in the Diana flashback were cool. I should definitely check out his FTEs to get a little more context, but wow. While I'm not surprised he was the chapter one victim, I'm a little disappointed we'll never hear more from him.

Grace was great, her demeanor is kinda similar to another favorite character of mine, so I've become pretty endeared to her. I'm interested in seeing where the bunny symbolism goes, and how she'll react to Wolfgang being gone. She had no FTEs (her actually responding when I tried to enter her dorm (I was doing an experiment to see if I could enter anyone but Kai's and Damon's) jumpscared me haha), so I'm guessing she'll live a bit longer and receive some character development! Yay!

Wenona was fun, her attitude was as entertaining as ever. She's probably one of the characters I most want to go do the FTEs of, I'm interested to hear more about her.

Desmond and Eloise's friendship was fun, the scene where they try to get Grace to let them in Wolfgang's room was definitely the highlight of both their characters for me this chapter. Eloise standing up for herself during the confrontation and Desmond backing her up without hesitation was awesome. Can't wait to see their friendship expanded on (And Desmond being angsty during the closing argument was hilarious).

Toshiko and Jett already had most of my thoughts laid out above. Jett I've mostly finished describing, but I did like Ingrid and Toshiko's friendship this chapter. Toshiko's whole pretending-she's-totally-not-freaking-out-and-being-actively-traumatized thing was good, I liked how she was desperate to sound smart in the trials, it fits her character.

Mark was a little ruder than I thought he'd be going in, but I'm not complaining. While I don't think anything topped "Grace, call the fire brigade" this chapter, some things got pretty close, like his annoyed facial expression when you agree with him. Him not wanting to be acknowledged at all at the gaming tournament was interesting, I'm excited to see where they take his character.

Ingrid...Was fine. I'll be honest, I was a little disappointed at how my view of her failed to change at all this chapter. Even her blackmail was something we learned in the Prologue already. Still, I can appreciate her. Even if she didn't change much this chapter, I still like what she is right now. She's all-around pretty cool, and I like how she makes sure to defend Toshiko, unlike some characters I know. /j

(Her being called "reliable" made me immediately feel like she might not last long, though... :()

Jean is pretty interesting to me so far, Cassidy suggesting that he might just be posing as a 'pirate' was intriguing. Him saying there was an arcade on his ship made me think of a crack theory that he worked at a Chuckie Cheese type place, but instead of there being a strange mouse, you could hang around at his prop ship and take pictures with him and his "crewmates" (Co-workers or employees) in costume, with an arcade and snack bar nearby...His knowledge of machinery stuff is also cool. I should check out his FTEs.

Cassidy's whole gaming gimmick is cool, and I like her, but I think if I'm being honest, her fun design and awesome voice actor kinda carry her for me. I don't think she'd be one of my favorites to hear speak otherwise. Some of her voicelines are just hilarious by themselves, too, though ("I better zip up my fly, my genius is showing" was my favorite, like what the fuck that is so random and funny and she only uses it once). She's a character who I don't think I'd find nearly as funny if the vocal delivery wasn't as on point as it is, but seeing as it's totally awesome and on point I have nothing to complain about she’s really cool haha.

And those are all my general thoughts on each of the characters. Now onto a few individual moments I really liked!

I replayed the Prologue before playing through chapter 1, and something really cool I noticed was that when they're on the train, this happens after Cassidy says she smells something weird:

I thought it was really cool how they subtly foreshadowed his lack of a sense of smell like that! The devs really thought his character through from the beginning, I suppose.

But moving on to chapter 1, specifically the trial. One detail I really liked was this:

“Near the boiler room door, I discovered a thin piece of metal.”

“During the investigation, there was a strange smell permeating the boiler room. It took me a moment to notice, but when I did…”

Damon takes credit for both the scrap metal and the smell.

This happens very directly with the metal, where he says that he discovered it. While he does admit he didn't think the metal was important before, what he fails to do is give credit to Ulysses for pointing it out to him, since Damon didn't notice it until Ulysses did. And when Ulysses did notice it, Damon berated him for even writing it down. And yet now here he is, pretending that he took note of the piece of metal all by himself.

He also takes credit for finding the smell, albeit slightly less directly. But he still makes it sound like he noticed it by himself, when Jean was the one who had to directly point it out to him. And even then, Damon could only smell the generator at first, and Jean had to further explain what he meant. And Damon pretty much plagiarizes his description of the smell without crediting him, too. You’d think a debater would know how to cite their sources correctly, haha.

So long story short, Damon fails to mention that he got help investigating from both Ulysses and Jean. I find that interesting because even though Damon says he can only rely on himself right before this trial starts, he is actively ignoring that he is only able to steer the trial in the right direction at certain points because of the help he received from others. The game is both proving his point about him only relying on himself (+Eva this trial) wrong, while also letting the player further see his mindset. Pretty cool. (Though I’d honestly be kinda pissed if I was Ulysses haha).

I also really liked Eva this chapter. Legitimately the first chapter death I've been most sad about in any Fangan. Usually I see the fake-out support thing coming a mile away, since it's such a common thing in fangans, but they genuinely fooled me with Eva. I really got attached to her and I'm sad to see her go.

I still haven't really fully processed her character, but what I do know is that she's really cool and relatable and her voice actor is very talented. Her design is amazing. Her sense of humor is immaculate. Overall, amazing character I was devastated to see go.

One cool detail I noticed, in order to commemorate my love for her:

After avoiding Grace, which Damon theorizes was because she didn't want her talent mocked, she investigates the Dining Hall people. And yet, even though she mentions Jett and Mark being unhelpful, she says nothing about Kai.

This could be shrugged off by the fact Kai said something helpful about the footsteps when Damon approached, but since Kai says this info like he hasn't shared it with anyone else, I don't think that's the case. Instead, I think this confirms Damon's suspicion that she is avoiding those who mocked her real talent, since Kai is definitely a jerk about it to her face on at least two occasions. She legitimately just didn't speak with him. That really hits home just how uncomfortable Eva was with a lot of the people in the killing game.

(I'll talk more about this in the Kai post, but Eva not mentioning Kai when you enter the dining hall, and Desmond also not mentioning where he went before that, made me actually start worrying that we were gonna find a second body haha, that's why I noticed this).

Lastly, I'd just like to say:

Even Desmond and Eloise being like "dude no stfu" at Diana in this CG was hilarious and I love it.

[tyrantisterror]

At Sea Without a Map Post-Script

After two months of so, my little writing experiment At Sea Without a Map has come to an end. And because I'm vain, I not only felt compelled to share it, but to talk about it in depth after the fact, so here we are. This is going to be long, though, so I'm not only going to break it into sections, but put it all under the cut for the sake of your dashboard. So go ahead and dive into the depths of the Sea of Monsters with me one more time!

Part 1: Never Stop Blowing Up

The writing process of Wizard School Mysteries Book 3 was really strained - not because of the book itself, mind you. When I was actually able to work on it, Book 3 came together really well - I think it required the least substantial rewrites of any my novels thus far. It's just that real life was kind of beating the shit out of me while I was trying to get it done - or maybe the better metaphor was that it was just slowly but steadily draining me of energy all the time. I'm honestly surprised I got the book out in roughly the same amount of time as the first two - by the way life had been treating me, it should have taken longer.

But when I got done with it I was accutely aware of how tired I was. I still had the creative drive, but fuck I needed something simple as a palette cleanser - something easy, and more importantly, something that was allowed to be bad. I needed something creative to do that was surplus to requirements and fully within its rights to suck ass so long as I had fun making it.

Around this time, I decided to rewatch Dimension 20's Never Stop Blowing Up. Brief explanation of what that is: Dimension 20 is an actual play show, i.e. a recording of people playing D&D and other TTRPGs. I'd say its reputation is built on the contrast of its main DM, Brennan Lee Mulligan, who makes these meticulously crafted campaign plans, and his chaotic band of improv comedian players who promptly derail those plans spectacularly. Like, a good deal of the show's humor comes from Emily Ashford or Ally Beardsly doing something so off-the-wall that it shatters whatever the scene was going to be and creates a far more absurd and zany spectacle in its place. Which is why Never Stop Blowing Up is pretty notable, because it's the one campaign where Brennan himself is the agent of chaos, fully unleashing his own brand of madness that the players struggle to keep up with. And fuck does he seem to have fun with it.

Of course, all of the analysis above is purely from the outside looking in - it's likely that a lot of the "chaos" is played up for the audience. But still... there is something to the idea of a person who's been working on meticulously structured stories letting loose and just doing something extremely stupid.

So I decided to give myself a Never Stop Blowing Up moment - a short story that would be simple by design, with no standards to live up to or goal beyond "have fun telling a silly little story." I then came up with a few key criteria:

It can't be set in the Midgaheim/ATOM universe. I don't want the burden of figuring out where this story would fit among others.

It's gotta be a romance. People who've read my books might have picked up on the fact that I like to write about people falling in love, for the same reason I like to write about fire-breathing reptiles and friendly monsters (i.e. I use writing to indulge in things I'll never experience in real life). I've only used romance as subplots in my fiction before, and tend to feel a bit guilty if I focus on it too long - like I'm being self indulgent. Well, this is all about self indulgence, so the romance should be front and center.

It's gotta be SIMPLE, episodic even. Not complex plotting required.

I almost chose my xenomorph romance for this, but I had developed its outline to the point where it would be too complex to fit. I then considered a sort of superhero story that could be pitched as "what if Bringing Up Baby but Katherine Hepburn's character is a Harley Quinn-esque supervillain and Cary Grant's character gets turned into some sort of horrifying genetic mutant in the first ten minutes." That one hit a weird roadblock when I got to the character brainstorming phase (the first phase of any writing project I do) - I was trying to figure out what the mad scientist who turns out Cary Grant-figure into a mutant would be named, came up with the name "Dr. Skullfuck," immediately realized that having a character named "Dr. Skullfuck" is a Mark Millar-ass writing move that I could not allow myself to do, but then couldn't stop thinking of the name "Dr. Skullfuck" and giggling, which just brought all thinking to a grinding halt on that project.

(I'll still probably do it someday, though - just, you know, without Dr. Skullfuck)

Inspiration struck again, though. I'd been getting into Epic: The Musical, a musical retelling of The Odyssey, and it put me in the mood for a sea monster story. But, more than that, it got me thinking about one particular archetype from sea monster stories - but that brings us to the next part of this Post Script...

Part 2: It Was Always About Calibani

Ok, so, one of the big changes Epic: The Musical made involved Odysseus's encounter with the sirens, and before you read more of my rambling, I'd like you to watch two animatics for the two songs in question here:

A summary: one of the sirens takes the form of Odysseus's wife to try and tempt him into getting in the water, Odysseus tricks her into giving him directions, captures her and the rest of her kind, and proceeds to have his men slaughter them horribly. In the OG story the sirens don't die - nor does their song involve imitating a man's wife, for that matter, it's just a really pretty song.

This is done for an important narrative purpose - Epic: The Musical is focused on analyzing the moral ambiguity of Odysseus, and how it is constantly challenged by the impossible choices he is forced to make in his attempt to get home. At this point in the musical, Odysseus has decided to stop trying to be a compassionate man, shirking all mercy in favor of utter ruthless pursuit of his goals. These two songs are meant to be unsettling as hell - this is the beginning of a series of heartless choices by both Odysseus and his men that will culminate in the mutiny and complete annihilation of Odysseus's crew, as well as Odysseus himself being so hopelessly stranded that nothing short of divine intervention will save him.

I bring this up because when I first heard these two songs - specifically while watching these two animatics - it, like... it devastated me. I was so horrified and sad, so shaken by it. And part of it was for the reasons outlined above, but admittedly that wasn't the gut reaction I had. No, my immediate reaction was, and I quoute my own broken brain verbatim here: "You can't kill the sirens! They're not for killing, they're for loving!"

...now, those of you who know me are probably not surprised by this very stupid sentiment coming from me. One of my more popular posts is just me talking about how down bad I would be for various folkloric monsters whose whole shtick is "looks like a pretty lady but Watch Out." But as a person filled with immense self loathing and doubt, my brain immediately looked at that very stupid sentiment I expressed and said, "Wait, no, that's fucking dumb, I'm fucking dumb. The sirens are remorseless murderers. These sirens in particular preyed upon a man's love for his wife, who he has not seen in twelve years, to convince him to let them kill him. They are, by all standards of morality, Very Fucking Evil, and if they were not women you would not feel bad about them getting killed."

And as my brain argued with itself over this topic, I got to thinking about the various monstrous/othered sea women of The Odyssey - not just the sirens, but the witch Circe, the nymph Calypso, the monsters Scylla and Charybdis. And I thought about the others of their kind in other myths and folktales - selkies, mermaids, etc.

There's an archetype of sea monster that focuses entirely on one specific anxiety sailors are prone to, namely the fact that (for a good deal of human history) being on a boat meant spending a lot of time away from women. The horror of this monster is how it uses that desire for female company to tempt people into danger - like a mirage, it leads you to expose yourself to danger in pursuit of an illusory comfort.

But, unlike real world mirages, these monstrous sea women DO exist in their stories. More than that, they're often, like, sad and lonely. Their narrative purpose is just to be a temptation, but that doesn't change the fact that they do have lives of their own in these worlds. And, softie that I am, I can't help feeling sad for them, especially the ones who actually seem to want the same companionship the sailors they tempt want. Sailors don't stay with their Circes, they don't marry their Calypsos. The sirens live on a barren rock, alone, Scylla is left to wallow in misery at her monstrous form, and the selkie always has to leave for fear of being trapped by a person who won't love her on her terms.

I realized I had my hook for this simple, easy, silly little sea monster romance story: I was going to give a sea woman the happy ending she'd never get from anyone else.

Sailor may be the protagonist, but make no mistake: At Sea Without a Map was always, always, ALWAYS about Calibani.

The goal with Calibani was simple: I was going to set up a fairly standard Monstrous Sea Woman, but where other stories would let her be in one episode of the travel narrative and move on, this one would stick around. She'd be an unambiguous predator of human beings - an open and admitted maneater - but she would have no true malice to her. She, like all predators, eats what she can get to survive, and it just so happens that she's adapted to eat humans. And the story would pose the same question to the reader that my brain posed to me during Different Beast: is there any way you could make a siren-style sea monster sympathetic? Can you make a normal person who doesn't have my particular brain rot look at a maneating siren and think, "You're not supposed to kill her, you're supposed to love her!"

One of the few unavoidable plot points of At Sea Without a Map was that Calibani and Sailor's relationship would become romantic. What kind of romance it was could have varied substantially - it could have been one-sided, it could have been toxic, it could have been far more tragic OR far more comedic. But it was always, always going to be a romance of some sort - the goal of this experiment was to make you, the reader, love Calibani. All else was icing on the cake.

I decided to base Calibani's personality on Miranda from The Tempest - i.e. a sweet girl who is both wordly and naive, who understands the strange setting of our "lost at sea" story far better than the audience viewpoint character does, but views the mundane world of the audience viewpoint character with wonder and naiveté. In fact I almost named her Miranda outright... except I already had a character in the setting I chose for this story who had that name, and as an allusion to the same Shakespearean character no less. So I settled on naming her after Miranda's adoptive sibling (of sorts), Caliban - more fitting in some ways, as Caliban is a fish-human hybrid who is arguable more native to the magic island in The Tempest than Miranda herself.

(Calibani isn't the only Tempest name homage, either - her mother, Sycorax, takes her name directly from Caliban's unseen but oft-spoken of witch mother. Dr. Antonia Warefore takes her first name from Antonio, one of the human villains in The Tempest who hopes to use being lost at sea as a way to perform a coup. And the mothman Iriel takes her name from Ariel, the wind spirit in The Tempest who aids the wizard Prospero in controlling the magic island. If Sailor has a "real" name, it's probably either Ferdinand or Miranda, the two lovers who manage to blend civilization and the wilderness together with their romance.)

Visually, I wanted Calibani to not be any common archetype of sea monster woman, but rather something that evokes the popular images while still being her own thing. She's not a mermaid or a siren or a selkie - she's basically "what if a sea serpent was also a girl." In-universe, she's chubby because she, like all marine megafauna, needs blubber to survive. Out-of-universe, she's chubby because I've found that routinely drawing cute chubby girls is good for my mental health.

Part 3: CYOA

Now, while we live in a post-Muncher society where shame and cringe are emotions only the cowardly should experience, I am nonetheless Very Catholic about expressing my own feelings of, like, liking girls and shit. I cannot help feeling guilty when publicly expressing adoration of women without, like, an excuse - it's gotta be a joke or something, you know? I can't be genuine about it, or else Jesus will beat me with a cane for disrespecting women with my lecherous gaze.

But luckily I've cultivated a loyal audience of fellow monsterfuckers, which meant I had an excuse lined up: if I made this a choose your own adventure type deal, a story with audience participation, then you all would be my accomplices. And Jesus can't cane all of us! He doesn't have enough hands! I found a loophole bigger than his stigmata!

Plus I love collaborative story-telling - there's a thrill in not having total control of where the narrative is going. As Brennan Lee Mulligan must know, there's a joy in having to deal with the chaos thrown your way by letting others grab the figurative ball, even if just for a moment.

Part 4: Offbeat Melody

Since I did not want to set this story in Midgaheim, I decided to steer myself away from a vaguely medieval setting altogether. But I also didn't want to limit myself with the need for "realism" that putting it in a normal sea would require, and making a new setting whole cloth would start pushing this project into "not easy" territory.

Luckily, I had a setting lying around that I hadn't played with in a while, which just so happened to have a location that was PERFECT for the sort of Never Stop Blowing Up style madness I was aiming for. For a few years I ran a Monster of the Week TTRPG campaign called Offbeat Melody, and one of its core setting elements was taking the goblin universe hypothesis in paranormal science (yeah it's a real hypothesis) to an illogical extreme. We had specifically seen glimpses of the Sea of Monsters in Offbeat Melody, i.e. the parallel universe where monsters like Nessie, Ogopogo, Champ, and the like all hail from. Well, why not have a whole story set there? It's literally a universe devoted solely to creating sea monsters - what better place to strand our modern Odysseus?

Offbeat Melody was always sort of a Never Stop Blowing Up project, or at least NSBU adjacent. Some of my most unhinged story-telling moments are in that campaign - you could make a supercut of just the "commercial breaks" in the various sessions and it'd basically be an I Think You Should Leave episode. Taking one obscure corner of its multiversal world and exploring it in detail was perfect for this project.

Part 5: Monster by Monster

With our main romance as sorted out as could be for a CYOA story, it was time to figure out the "episodes" of this sea voyage. I settled on there being ten to roughly align with The Odyssey - just in terms of number, mind you, not in a one-to-one comparison. The first was, obviously, Calibani herself, which left nine more slots for me to fill with monsters. Let's go through them together in brief:

Tree Storks - any lost at sea story eventually has to get its protagonist into an island at some point, but this immediately begs the question, "Why don't they just stay on the island where it's safe?" The answer to that question has to be, "it's not safe there, actually." The Odyssey does this quickly and cleverly with a one two punch: the first island seems safe until you realize the food on it brainwashes you into forgetting everything except your desire to eat it, and the second island is full of delicious sheep but also giants who will eat you just as easily as they eat the sheep. When other islands show up in the story later, you immediately regard them with suspicion, because you don't know HOW they're going to be fucked up, but they definitely will be. My goal with the second episode was to establish the same sort of danger - that land is NOT safe, that islands WILL be fucked up and dangerous in ways you might not expect.

I also wanted to establish that this is not just a sea of monsters, but a very WEIRD sea of WEIRD monsters. It couldn't be any old monster on this island - it had to be one that was unique, unexpected, and maybe just a bit silly while still being menacing.

I've always felt that there's a lot of un-mined horror potential in storks, cranes, and herons - any bird with a long neck and spear-like beak it uses to stab smaller creatures from above. Just imagine yourself in a frog's place in the world - tiny, going about your business, when suddenly something shoots down at you from above and impales you before you even feel the shadow fall over your face. Or perhaps you did see the shadow - some of these birds spread their wings to create shade specifically to attract fish, and then spear the poor little bastards.

Well, what do people often look to islands for when out at sea? Shade - the shade of a palm tree. And palm fronds kinda resemble feathers, don't they? Wouldn't it be both ludicrous and terrifying is there was a stork big enough to mimic a palm tree - and wouldn't that be a DEVIOUS trap for a sun-drenched sailor to fall for? So the Tree Storks were born.

The Globster - I made a list of sea monster archetypes in the early planning for this project, and one I wanted to include was a kraken, i.e. some sort of tentacled sea beast. But I didn't want to do JUST a big squid or octopus, or even a riff on them. I wanted to take the idea of "big sea monster with lots of tentacles" into a stranger direction.

Since the Sea of Monsters is explicitly the home universe of lake and sea monster cryptids, I thought it might be fun if ASWaM's kraken equivalent was a globster - just a big ball of rotten meat. I love drawing monstrous faces, so I decided it'd just be, like, MADE of hideous rotten faces, all melting and congealing together, with its tentacles doubling as the tongues of its many mouths. A perfectly wretched image that, like the Tree Storks, would do well to establish how Fucked things could get in this setting. Plus similar monsters had appeared in Offbeat Melody, which would make for a fun sense of familiarity for the, like, five or so readers of mine who had listened to that campaign before.

Captain Peter & the Dolphin - Another thing I did in the early planning stages of this project was make a list of the different sea voyage stories I know and love, the most contentious of which is The Life of Pi. That's a story that I love on a literal level but kind of hate on a figurative level - its whole theme/message is that doubt is the worst thing you can have, that if you don't commit to believing something with zealous conviction you are a coward. As a person who thinks doubt is valid, that "I don't know" is sometimes the ONLY truly valid answer to a question, I have issues with that message.

But I can't help loving the beautifully ludicrous idea of a non-anthropomorphic tiger sailing the ocean on a big Odyssey of its own. Like, if that story didn't actively hate me for being agnostic, it would be one of my favorites.

So I decided to, you know, just steal the idea of a tiger Odysseus. The tiger in The Life of Pi is named Richard Parker. Richard Parker also happens to be the name of Peter Parker's dad. Hence we get Captain Peter - the figurative son of Richard Parker, if you will. And to ratchet up the absurdity of a tiger Odysseus, I made him a pirate and the sole sailor of his voyage. Somehow, this tiger has manned a boat on his own.

Captain Peter was intended to be the hero of another story - a sign for the readers that it IS possible for a stranded person (or, in this case, tiger) to survive out here. To that end, he had to rescue our heroes from another threat, but not one that would be interesting enough to take the focus off of the tiger pirate. Originally I planned for that threat to just be a big shark, but I ended up liking my shark design too much to put it in a role that small, so I quickly designed a nasty dolphin for the role instead. I think that worked out well, honestly.

Dr. Neptune - Episodes 5 and 6 were the mid-point of this journey, so I wanted the two monsters of those to escalate things significantly. I figured episode 5 was probably a good place to FINALLY give some meaningful exposition on what was going on, and there are a lot of stories about mad scientists doing weird shit on islands in my big list of sea voyage stories I love. So we get Dr. Neptune, a classical brain-in-a-jar mad scientist who's affable enough to give more-or-less accurate exposition but loony enough to be a problem. This also felt like a good spot to remind the reader that Calibani is not just a girl with a tail but rather a Sea Monster herself, and one that we'd been making stronger by allying with.

With his human-but-not-quite nature and cyclops eye, Dr. Neptune could sort of be seen as the Polyphemus of this story, couldn't he?

The Crocodisle - One of the sea monster archetypes on my list was "the island that's actually a sleeping monster," of which there are many in mythology and folklore. My favorite is the Jasconius from the voyage of St. Brendan, mainly because it's more or less benign and actually comes back to help St. Brendan and his crew at the end of the story. I always love when I can find an old story with a friendly monster in it.

When thinking of my own spin on the island monster concept, I remembered the only Magic the Gathering card I had as a kid, which I still have and love to this day: The Sandbar Crocodile. This card already inspired Crocogon's color scheme in The Atomic time of Monsters, but I felt I could go to that well again one more time, and so made a crocodile that wasn't just a sandbar, but a whole damn island to itself. And, like Jasconius, it turns out he's pretty chill.

I did not think of the pun name "Crocodisle" until I was actually writing the chapter in question.

The Femdom Mermaids - These three were a late addition to the roster. When I had Calibani bring up mermaids early in the story, I realized as soon as I wrote her rant about them that we'd HAVE to meet some later on in the story.

The readers had significantly shaped Calibani and Sailor's romance by this point, and I decided that it could be useful to have a chapter that was devoted to showing definitively how these two were good for each other. I thought the mermaids could provide a good contrast: have them act out a seemingly more benign take on the monstrous sea women trope (they abduct our hero to protect and care for them!) only for it to quickly feel MORE deranged than Calibani's comparatively simple desire just to eat him.

The spirit of Calibani's rant about mermaids was taken from weird* girls I knew in high school complaining about cheerleaders, so I wanted the mermaids to look like the sea monster equivalent of popular kids to Calibani's chubby weird girl. Two of them got the names of famous beauties - Helyne = Helen of Troy, Clio = Cleopatra.

(*when I say "weird" I mean it in a complimentary and affectionate sense)

Bob, meanwhile, kinda... rebelled, I guess? Before I had names for them, I listed "bob" by her as just, like, a descriptor for her hair cut, but then I liked it as her name, and once she was named Bob she became more than just a mean popular girl. She was a weirdo too, the little punching bag of the two mean popular girls who did their dirty work and smiled through their abuse because hey, at least they included her. It gave the trio an easily defined dynamic, helped make two of the three more visibly nasty, and gave us comic relief in an arc that could very well have gotten too uncomfortable otherwise.

And I guess it worked - readers REALLY loved Bob, and were very vocal about it, and I realized mid-arc that I had accidentally made her too likable to just leave in this arc. So Bob got to be rescued from her awful friend group thanks to readers like YOU.

Lord Ironteeth - yeah, this was the shark that was too cool to be a minor threat. When I drew his noggin, I realized he would need a chapter of his own, one with gravitas. I decided he'd specifically be the threshold guardian -once we beat him, we'd know for sure how to get home, even if there were a few more threats in store.

Spindle Inc and Sycorax - when I was a kid I used to have this recurring nightmare about being on some sort of underwater sea station that had this huge sea serpent trapped inside it. I'd look at the sea serpent from a window within the station and see it coiling in its tank, only for it to look at me with fury. In that glance I would suddenly realize two things with absolute clarity: first, it was going to break free and kill everyone, and second, we deserved that destruction for what we had done to it. The terror of the dream was less that the sea serpent was going to break free, and more the guilt of knowing that all the mayhem that was about to unfold was our fault to begin with.

I thought that would be fun to homage with the penultimate chapter of this story. OBVIOUSLY the sea serpent was Calibani's mom, obviously the trauma of its capture was why Calibani grew into a predator that specializes in hunting humans, obviously we would have to free the sea serpent despite that running counter to Sailor's goal of getting home. Easy, easy, easy plot point to include.

Spindle, Inc. is the primary antagonistic force in Offbeat Melody, so they easily slotted into the role of the arrogant humans who captured this monster for nefarious and selfish motives. They could tie a lot of other plot threads together too - Dr. Neptune was a scientist who worked for them as a contractor only to get screwed over (i.e. they stranded him in the Sea of Monsters, expecting him to die, and then used his research to make their own base of operations in it), we'd learn of him through a spindle briefcase left behind by some unfortunate rogue agent who got eaten by the Globster while he was trying to escape, hell they could even be one of the possible origins of Sailor themself (more on that later). Very useful villains, Spindle.

The Abyssal Mother - I knew the last sea monster would need a lot of punch to it. I briefly considered just a big whale - the Moby Dick to Spindle's corporate Ahab - but it felt underwhelming after all that came before. So I went for arguably the most dramatic possible sea monster, a full on Cthulhu-style elder god. If you're a frequent follower of this blog, you might know I have particularly high standards for Eldritch Abominations, so I realized this was going to be a pretty big challenge for me to live up to, and decided to keep the cthulhu in question reserved to the last few entries as a result - the less it appears, the less it has to live up to.

I realized I had a good angle when my experiments with the Cthulhu "squid for a head" concept ended up having a face framed in shadow - you know, the same visual that our protagonist has in most appearances. That provided some very juicy parallels between the two that made this final monster feel particularly noteworthy to me, ones that I'll leave you to ponder, since they tie into...

Part 6: Themes

I did not set out to have a theme in this story. I just wanted to make a sailor and a sea monster kiss. That was my only goal.

But I really don't begin with theme in ANY of my writing. I figure out topics I want to address, but for all my novels I feel like the themes didn't start coming together until about halfway through the first draft, when enough of the elements of the story had been set down and interacted with each other enough for me to realize what I was saying with them. A huge part of my second and third drafts for my novels have focused on making the themes of my stories more concrete and unified.

Well, ASWaM is very much a first draft of a story, but it's a simple enough story that I think the theme found itself pretty well despite lacking subsequent drafts to refine it.

ASWaM is about doubt and direction. It's about being adrift in a world that is in many ways hostile by nature, about not feeling like you're where you're supposed to be or even WHO you're supposed to be, and about setting off aimlessly in the hope that maybe you'll find your way to that mythical land of "what my life is supposed to be."

When I began the story, Sailor had amnesia and wore clothes that obscured their identity as a way to make it easier for anyone to step into Sailor's role. Sailor had to feel like You, the Reader, and so we don't know their name, their gender, their eye color, their hair color, even their skin color (note that their hands are always wearing gloves, and their face is always in shadow).

But it also meant Sailor is, well, undefined, at least at the start of the story. Sailor doesn't know who they are, what they are, how they came to be. Sailor feels distinctly that they should be Something Else, should be Somewhere Else, should be Someone Else, should not be who/what/where they are. Sailor is plagued by doubt, by a need to go in a different direction, by a need to be other than they are.

This initially contrasts with Calibani, who begins the story very confident that she is doing exactly what she was designed to be doing and acting exactly like she should be. As they interact, they begin to shift each other in opposite directions - Calibani questions her existence and nature, sometimes to a self destructive degree, and Sailor begins to find something about who and where they are that they like. They find a healthy middle ground together - doubtful enough to want to be better people, but with love for themselves that allows them to not feel the need to up-heave their lives entirely.

I knew at the start that I would build an expectation for there to be some answer to the question of who Sailor is and where they came from, because those are the questions that begin the whole narrative. I brainstormed a number of answers to those questions, but once I got a few chapters into writing the story and saw this theme of doubt developing, I realized I couldn't answer them. From a thematic standpoint, the doubt HAD to remain. So I gave hints to possible answers, bits of evidence to support the possibility of them being true, but never planted a smoking gun that answered it for sure.

Sailor can't know the answer because NONE of us know the answer. Outside of blind Life of Pi style faith, you cannot know for sure that you are living the life you're supposed to live. All you can do is figure out whether you're happy with the life you've got, or if you need a change. Sailor will never know who they are supposed to be, but they did learn who they are, and they love that person now.

For those curious, the possible Sailor origins are:

Occam's Razor: they're exactly what Dr. Neptune theorized, i.e. a human who got stranded in the Bermuda Triangle (or the Devil's Triangle or any other number of paranormal triangles) and fell into the Sea of Monsters. The trauma of that experience gave them amnesia. It's just brain damage and bad luck.

A Spindle Experiment: Dr. Warefore mentions that Spindle has been trying to find a way to make a human who can evolve like the denizens of the Sea of Monsters. Sailor may well be an attempt to do just that, perhaps one they wrote off as a failure and abandoned (they do that a lot)

A Deep One: Sailor is the offspring of one of the denizens of the Sea of Monsters (most likely the Abyssal Mother herself) who has somehow been tricked into believing they are human, to the point where they seem to be human to everyone else, even other monsters. Maybe a human summoned a sea monster to breed with on earth, and Sailor ended up being subconsciously drawn back to the Sea by their blood. Maybe Sailor never actually lived on earth at all, but was only made to THINK they had as part of the transformation into a human.

The Platonic Ideal of a Sailor: the Sea of Monsters is full of archetypal concepts, and arguably a sailor trying to find their way home is just as archetypal as any sea serpent, mermaid, or kraken. Our only proof that humans aren't native to the Sea of Monsters is Dr. Neptune, and he's not as reliable an expert as he claims to be.

This theme of doubt and direction also made the compass more important to the narrative than a simply mechanic for audience participation - a compass, after all, gives direction, and the feeling that Sailor is not where they're supposed to be, that they need to head in a different direction, is ultimately the catalyst of the plot. The compass is, in many ways, the antagonist of the story - the force that keeps Sailor from accepting themself. I realized this a little after I started making the different directions have personalities - initially they just represented broad concepts (North = follow conventional wisdom ala the North Star, South = preserve your short-term self interest at all costs, East = act with curiosity and be willing to take calculated risks, and West = throw caution to the wind and do anything that seems novel and exciting), but over time they became little characters themselves.

Since it was our thematic antagonist, I decided to pepper in some ideas about what the compass might be in-universe - and, in a move that would no doubt frustrate the compass, we also don't know for sure which of those is "correct." Is the compass a poltergeist, some amalgamation of dead sailors who try to steer other lost souls home? Is it a malign entity that leeches off of those desperate enough to seek its aid, living through them while pretending to aid them? Is it a device Spindle made to lure sailors to their clutches, OR to guide their experiments in human/monster hybrids? Was it a cursed item that forced a sea monster to assume a human shape? Who can say - the compass sure can't, it can only tell you a direction to go in.

Part 7: Q&A

Since this was an interactive story, I felt it was only fitting to add one last interactive element to this post-script write up, and some of your happily obliged me by sending in questions.

When I noticed how fast readers were falling for Calibani, I figured there was a good chance we'd end up staying in the Sea of Monsters. By chapter 7, I figured it was more or less a given, and by the end of the Lord Ironteeth encounter I was almost 100% sure Sailor would remain at sea. There was always a chance, though - while a look at the polls shows that the audience got more and more on the same page towards the end, there were always dissenting voices, and the desire to get an answer to the question of Who Sailor Was remained strong, as a number of people kept trying to find angles where they could get that AND stay with Calibani.

I was surprised early on by how easily the audience fell in love with Calibani, to the point where I made a few posts commenting on it. I mean, I shouldn't have been - as I said earlier, I have cultivated an audience of fellow monsterfuckers on here, and I know at least a few of them saw my bait and knew they could get me to be freaky in a way we found mutually agreeable (thank you all again for helping me escape being caned by Jesus for being horny).

Like, we REPEATEDLY ignored developing the plot in the Tree Storks chapter for several days just to spend more time with Calibani - something that I enjoyed immensely (this whole thing was an excuse for me to write and draw a cute chubby sea monster girl as much as possible aftter all) but also knew as a storyteller was not what most would consider a good story call. I like how it turned out, but it defied conventional narrative wisdom, you know? I was surprised.

On the other side of the coin, I was also surprised by how the audience NEVER chose an option that was humorously disastrous. I gave plenty of them, and, like, generally in collaborative storytelling there will be at least one moment where your collaborators decide to do the really, REALLY stupid thing that makes everything spiral out of control really quickly. I figured at least once the audience would choose the troll response, but no, you guys worked hard to keep Sailor and Calibani alive. You refused to let them hurt each other, refused to let them throw themselves into danger, refused to imperil them for your own chuckles. It was very sweet and unexpected.

I say "you refused" but to be fair it's not like NO ONE voted for the troll options - they generally got a handful of votes, just one that was beaten by a landslide of more reasonable options. Hopefully those of you who voted for the troll options enjoyed Bob throwing you a bone by disintegrating Dr. Warefore - that was my consolation prize to you.

Yes. I knew at the beginning that there would be two endings for this story: either Sailor leaves the Sea and goes home, or Sailor stays there forever. Or, you know, Sailor dies as a result of you guys choosing several stupid options in a row, but as stated above you guys avoided those scenarios pretty decisively.

Had Sailor gone home, the following would have occurred: first, they would forget everything that happened in the Sea of Monsters. Second, they would wake up in a hospital, having been found in the Atlantic Ocean by a human-recovery charity run by... oh, isn't that funny, some tech company named Spindle Inc! Spindle would foot the medical bills and even offer Sailor a job, but Sailor would decline because even now they're still not sure what Spindle even does. Sailor would go back to their life and find it familiar and utterly mundane, but not particularly happy. Their father died when they were 18, their mother was never in the picture, they have no siblings. They worked an office job and were sort of a nonentity - that position has long since been filled, but Sailor gets a new job and lives out much the same life: simple, mundane, dreary. Every now and then they get a pang of desire to leave, to go to sea, but they push it out of mind. They never even see the ocean again as long as they live.

Sailor would have gotten the normal life they thought they were supposed to have, the normal memories and name and identity, the mundane life of a normal person. And they just had to trade everything they found in the Sea of Monsters to get it. A question is answered, a direction is followed, but is it the right answer, the right direction?

Well, I think doubt would have remained.

I had a very vague idea for there to be some sort of man-eating giant in, like, a crystal castle. He got cut to make way for the mermaids.

I wanted to fit in a big whale and a giant crustacean, but there wasn't room or an interesting angle for me to want to make room for them. Saved for a possible sequel, I suppose.

I also wanted to have a scene with, like, DOZENS of sea monsters, including some of the ones from Offbeat Melody, but the goal of "this should be EASY you dumbass" made me kill that idea pretty quick.

Thank you!

The primary inspirations were:

The Odyssey and Epic: the Musical

The voyage of St. Brendan

The many "weird shit happens on an island" movies in Toho's filmography, i.e. Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster, Son of Godzilla, Yog Monster of the Deep, Matango, etc.

The Island of Dr. Moreau

The Boy and the Heron

Ponyo (specifically Ponyo's parents - I wanted Sailor to have the same desperate energy as that wizard who fucks the giant sea goddess)

The Life of Pi

Slay the Princess (perhaps most obvious in the use of second person narration, multiple voices in the protagonist's head, and falling in love with a creature that has tried to kill you at least once)

I'm going to use this to springboard to a related point in a second, but first a genuine yet humorous answer: Yes, absolutely yes, I am enough of a big romantic sap that I would give everything about my life away to be with a person who loves me and explore a world of monsters in a heartbeat. Hell, I would have jumped in the water the minute Calibani asked and died with her fangs in my neck and a smile on my face. I am dumb this way. Do not follow my example.

On that related point, though... Most stories like this, I daresay ALL stories like this that I know of, end with the hero abandoning the fantasy world in favor of reality, never to return. And that seems like the proper choice and lesson on the surface - we don't want to tell audiences to give up their real life in favor of a fantasy, after all. That's encouraging escapism, and that's not healthy!

But, like... textually speaking, the fantastical world IS real to the characters in these stories. And it's often not really an escape - was Sailor's life devoid of conflict and suffering in the Sea of Monsters? Fuck no! It's just that they figured out how to deal with that conflict and suffering - they built skills and a support system, they adapted, they learned how to overcome what was there.

I think it can be argued that sometimes the return to a "normal" world is, in itself, an escape - the idea that your life can spiral into chaos but that's ok, you can just reset everything and go back to The Way It Was and Should Be is just as unrealistic and unhealthy an idea as You Should Escape to A Better World. Sometimes your plans for your life fall apart, sometimes you're thrown into a place you never intended to go, sometimes you have to learn skills you never anticipated needing and ally with people you never thought you'd befriend to deal with problems you never dreamed you'd have to overcome. And sometimes it's ok to look at your derailed life, your Not Where You Should Be life, and say, "Well, I've learned how to live here... maybe I can stay."

Especially if there's a cute chubby sea monster girl who loves you.

Bob was never supposed to appear past chapter 7, but about halfway through that chapter I realized the audience and I myself would be heartbroken if we didn't rescue her. Definitely for the best - she provided some well-needed comic relief in the final chapters.

This is gonna sound snarky, but, yeah - there were 58 choices with four options a piece, and we only chose one of the four. While some of the options would have similar results, almost none would have had identical outcomes. And some would have been VERY different.

Like, to go back to the beginning: when Calibani attacked, we could either throw a net on her, harpoon her, try to drive around her, or hide below deck. We picked the net, but for the other three options:

Harpooning would result in us hitting her in the thigh, causing her enough pain that she collapses on our deck and we, horrified at the violence we committed, just sort of push on. Calibani would be wounded for at least the next chapter, perhaps longer, and significantly weaker (and probably harboring a great deal of hidden resentment while also being genuinely scared of Sailor). She would be vulnerable during the stork attack, forcing Sailor to take a more active role in that chapter.

Trying to steer around her would result in us essentially fighting her with our boat, resulting in the boat capsizing and Calibani getting tangled up in it. We'd wake up alone on Stork Island and have to travel in search of our boat, alone and vulnerable among man-eating trees. We'd run into Calibani again, also beached and in trouble, end up recruiting her to help us get our boat out of the sand.

Hiding below deck would end in a sea storm that leaves us inside our boat as it's beached on Stork Island. We'd fend off the storks alone, and run into Calibani once we get our boat out to sea, as she got away more or less unscathed.

All of these would have majorly changed the trajectory of our relationship with Calibani and our identity as Sailor, despite seeming to have the same component parts on the surface. Now account for how similarly slight changes in the other options could have gone, and we could have had a very different story indeed.

Part 8: Our Girl

I just think she's neat!

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I know you're more of a Killer person but I wanted to share some thoughts on Horror since I've been going back abit for his comic and lore I've never played the game though.

I feel like Horror has one main fanon interpretation and that he's a big guy who's soft for his other teammates, makes excellent food always eating something or constantly thinking of just food who gardens and cooks constantly. Also, he wields a giant axe but can't use magic anymore and really only cares for his Papyrus. Oh and he's a cannibal who eats humans disregarding the fact that humans ans monsters are different species. Oh also problems saying sentences or a single word so barely talks and he has problems with his memory where he doesn't properly make new memories.

Horror is so much more then that first of all that guy isn't soft, I'm unsure if he can even cook, doesn't seem like someone who would garden but more likely hunt or just go to a store. He's rude, mean, and a sadist. He won't directly hurt you when Papyrus is close by and as long as he is entertained doesn't have much of an urge to hurt you either. He's super paranoid and distrusting believing anyone can simply betray him even those closest. He's not even big its mentioned that he is still small and is only seen tall by the human child. He's probably the most judgemental of the group and manges to have the worst trust issues out of all of them. You already know he hasn't eaten in what 7 years, he's willing to give up food to others if he thinks they need it more even if it would be harder on him and Papyrus he has a huge sense of community with Snowdin in which people respect him but are also afraid of him. He seems to isolate himself from the rest of them not exactly physically but its obvious he keeps his distance emotionally and most of the physically away from them despite being the glue that holds them together. He was only shown once with an axe and it wasn't comically huge it says he prefers a heavy thigh bone and it's been shown he still has access to his magic and can use it even during present time. He wouldn't even physically touch Aliza he made a whole paragraph to stop him from eating anything alive. Also he yaps a lot he's almost constantly talking throughout the comic don't know about the game but I've seen a bit and it doesn't seem like his chattiness is lessened. Also despite what many think he has retrograde amnesia not antegrade amnesia. Meaning his memories of before the injury are blured or gone its mentioned that many of the things in Frisk run is forgotten he doesn't have any problems making new memories or any speech impediment.

Sorry for the rant but you're probably my favorite person to just share my thoughts with

~Musical Anon

You don’t have to apologize for ranting in my inbox. I may be the Killer and Color guy, but I enjoy when people rant to me about other characters and aus too. It’s nice to hear from everyone.

The idea that the yapper in the Murder Time Trio all along was actually Horror instead of Killer is so silly though.

And given that he is only seen as tall from the human child’s POV, and Killer was drawn as smaller than his Chara even though he doesn’t have a confirmed canon height, does this potentially mean that Killer could be smaller than Horror if only by a few inches?

[martialartslover7]

My main reasons, why, even with the facts, I STILL don't like The Last

Like, even with me keeping in mind, all the things I may end up getting wrong about the movie itself (I already had that experience here), outside of all this, I still would not like the movie. And here are my main reasons why:

Look, man, NaruHina scenes or not, the story, is frankly a glorified mess, like, in all seriousness, I cannot even pretend, an alien invasion (alien tropes, in this day and age, are highly unwelcome in general to me, due to how redundant and overused it has become over the years)? Overabundance of flashbacks to fuel the protagonist's strength? Hinata becoming a damsel in distress for a 3rd time (this isn't the first time, by the way)? The Otsutsuki inclusion as a whole, which frankly breaks the lore on downright biblical proportions, becoming Dragon Ball, if you ordered it on Wish? With a villain as lame and one-note as Toneri? No, thanks.

Are you seriously fine with Hinata being nerfed into the ground, just so the romance plot itself can advance? This point still frankly pisses me off, like, do you even like Hinata? I do, and I am not fine with the girl being made weaker, just so the plot, or especially the romance portion can advance, I know why she couldn't properly use her chakra, because Toneri was messing with her chakra, bla bla bla. It's a fact, that it happened. But I still should be allowed to call it, for what it is: BULLSHIT. Hinata trained her whole life, just to be accepted as the heiress of the entire Hyuga clan, and yet, you are telling me, that, even with all this mumbo-jumbo garbage, she officially becomes less useful than a boil on my bum, and can't channel ANY chakra to stick to the wall? Literally, hanging by a thread, and NEEDING to be saved by Naruto? I dunno about you guys, but I am just so salty over this. EVERYTHING has to hinge on Naruto, because, of course, it's not like, Hinata trained her whole life, having managed to master a technique that not any other Hyuga managed to unlock, having the most the potent of Byakugan with the widest radius in existence, and became a master of the Gentle Fist... ...yeah, pffft, great job. All achievements, off-screen, and we barely even get a glimpse of that in the movie, and for a secondary protagonist, she gets reduced to a jobber, who either gets kidnapped 24/7, or gets easily overpowered, way too quickly, that's just pathetic, man. It ALMOST makes you want to say, "Maybe Hiashi was right to never pick her", and I want to hit myself for saying that.

The romance portion itself, even if, I can somewhat accept the explaination of Naruto being "slow on the draw", or maybe, having been too traumatized to talk to Hinata about this entire debacle with her confession during the Pain arc, because he was still processing all of it, it still doesn't explain how this movie got away with deadass LYING. STRAIGHT TO OUR FACES. ABOUT NARUTO'S INFATUATION WITH SAKURA. Trying to write it off as "Naruto was always in love with Hinata, and he only loved Sakura, out of a desire to compete with Sasuke", WHERE THE FUCK DOES THIS COME FROM? That's just straight up false. Naruto never loved Sakura, just to be in a "competition" with Sasuke, he was just irritated at how Sasuke got all the attention from the girls, while Naruto was left with nothing. It's just a fact, Naruto always had feelings for Sakura, that's literally one of the corner stones that defined the series, and the main characters, especially at the very beginning. Whether you like it or not, Sakura was always part of Naruto's journey, in becoming a better person, and I am saying this as someone, who is a conservative NaruHina shipper. Sure, it was shallow, one-sided, and based entirely on lust, on Naruto's end, but it still happened, you cannot ignore that away. The facts don't care about personal feelings. And mind you, I would have also preferred Hinata to be part of the main cast too, but, it is what it is. This "competition" nonsense, was never once implied in the original material, let alone Hinata "always having been there". That never happened. And look, hear me out, before you sharpen your pitchforks, yes, I get the point, rewrites or reimaginings can happen, I am also guilty of this, I will freely admit it. The vision can sometimes shift, when you get the feeling that, you could have written it better. But to have a whole ass movie dedicated to a whole ship, just to make the ship canon, and in the process having to gaslight everyone watching into thinking "Hinata was always there", is just so... it screams desperation to me, like, "Hmmm, oh god, Hinata is very popular, and NaruHina is super popular too, but they just lack on-screen chemistry, it is there, but it just isn't enough, and I suck at writing female characters on top of everything else, what do I do? Hinata was absent for the majority of the manga, and yet I put so much singular focus on Naruto's bond with Sakura, that can leave a path open for interpretation, which shouldn't even be a thing, if Sasuke exists, so... Let's just retcon everything in one whole movie, because, fuck consistency.". On that note, let me bring up another point that bothers me:

WHERE. THE FUCK. ARE KIBA. SHINO. AND KURENAI? For a movie, that is all about Naruto's and Hinata's bonds, the concerning lack of screentime for Hinata's own teammates, really rubs me the wrong way, on so many levels. Instead of investing all your budget in trying to justify the existence of aliens in the Narutoverse, or relying on cheap and contrived flashbacks, just to fuel a drama, that shouldn't even really BE that dramatic to begin with, why not give me some of that good ol' relationship angst with Hinata's teammates? In the series, she spent way more time with either Kiba or Shino, and there, the interpretation window for romance keeps persisting too, yet, they never got truly closed up, because they weren't present for the endgame, except, flashbacks, and Shino was omitted entirely. And where is Kurenai? Wasn't she like, Hinata's foster mother for half the series? And yet, she isn't deserving of the mere courtesy of talking to her own disciple and daughter figure, maybe even giving her advice about Naruto's behavior, maybe even motivating her to never give up, which is exactly what Naruto would have wanted? But nope, let's just instead focus on style over substance, by having yet another world-ending catastrophe on the horizon, where Naruto has to save everyone's bacon, yet again, because screw everyone else that Hinata ever had a connection to. No, she is just there, to have the ship become canon, so we can shut our mouths, and be happy about it. Guess what, I am not. And I never will be. The disrespect here, is on a monolithic scale, and no one should be so accepting of this level of mediocrity.

Also, since Hanabi is the main driving force for this movie, where she is said to be suffering the worst kind of torture imagineable, because of Toneri wanting her eyes, why is Hinata more focused on knitting that damned scarf, being jealous over the one Naruto has, and trying to get Naruto's attention? Shouldn't she be on edge? Shouldn't she be angry and impatient? And instead of saving her own fucking sister, on her own terms, she eats L after L, as if, Hiashi had always been right about her not deserving to be the heir. ...You have no idea, how much I hate myself for even IMPLYING this, Hiashi is a garbage human being, end of story. There is a time and place for everything, but this... this just feels weird, man, in hindsight, the whole thing with the scarf feels so random and out-of-left-field, and once again, it just plays into the argument that, they only wanted to cater to the shippers, not the characters themselves.

TL;DR. I still love NaruHina. I will never stop loving it. I am just mad, that the compromise for this movie being made, had to involve making Hinata as weak and laughable as a mug. This movie sucks the soul out of me, for how much it ruins Hinata as a standalone character. All the progress, all the lessons she learned, all the buffs, amounted to pretty much nothing, because all she is now, is either just a jobber, or a mere EXTENSION to Naruto, no longer much of her own thing. Go on, get all smart on me, telling me that my opinion really doesn't matter, yet you still feel the need to respond to this post, telling me that I am a "NaruSaku apologist", or whatever the fuck. I am done. Case closed. Your reactions will be more telling of you, than me.

PEACE.

[hanaybuns]

let me cook

guys i have a confession to make... and you have to hear me out...karatoto (karamatsu and totoko) is a fun pairing

NOW STAY WITH ME HERE FOR A SECOND

in the context of the show, i would only want them to stay friends, if not besties. i think the writers actually like pairing them up for certain scenes bc they can rely on kara to be slightly more normal (relative to the other matsus) when interacting with totoko. like, when you really think about it they interact a lot in the third season... i honestly think she interacted with kara the most in season 3 besides nyaa and possibly osomatsu.

(these are not the best screenshots but trust me they talk to each other in all of these scenes, except the one where kara is a horse)

but thats actually not why i like them as a pair... the real reason is because i like messiness and i like drama and i like fun and i think a secret relationship between karamatsu and totoko would have all of those things

(the even realer reason is because i'm wildly and shamelessly biased towards karamatsu. it's just that simple)

see, the reason it would be so fun is because no one would expect it. everyone in the show probably thinks that if totoko were to end up with anyone, it would be osomatsu. and that's not an unfounded belief, i think they definitely do have the deepest and most complex relationship out of the 6 as the two "leads".

them getting together would kind of represent this grand, but ultimately linear shift in the status quo. the main character gets the heroine. shocker. but it kind of is a shocker in a show like osomatsu san, and its characters aren't really ready for that kind of "ending" per se. especially not osomatsu, who thrives and desperately clings to the status quo like his life depends on it. and ofc totoko is in a similar boat, where she finds herself yearning for simpler, more fun times.

but maybe totoko just wants to have a little extra fun! maybe she just wants to take a quick detour! is that too much to ask?? can't a girl have a little fling on the side?? why does everything she does matter so much as the heroine??? it sucks!!

it's too hard to go out and find a rich hot guy to have fun with. thankfully, she has 6 men who are already head over heels for her! so she finds herself weighing the pros and cons of each sextuplet.

osomatsu is... complicated, so he's out

choromatsu is an automatic no

ichimatsu is okay... but he seems like a guy who needs more care than she's willing to give

jyushimatsu is complicated in a different, much weirder way

todomatsu... todomatsu is definitely a viable option, but she wants someone who will only have eyes for her and she doesn't like how totty always has 2 girls by his side

karamatsu... karamatsu was never really an option in her mind but like, he's pretty nice! and honestly recently he's been much more normal than he used to be (season 1). his painfullness has decreased substantially since then. he also doesn't look half bad! he and todomatsu definitely take care of their appearance the most out of the 6. they've talked a decent amount and they even had that one skit together... ignition.

(side note, weirdly enough i think the karamatsu taxi skit makes him the only matsu to ever call a woman a b*tch... which is surprising to say the least and honestly detracts from this whole thing a bunch but i just thought it was so crazy...yikes kara)

but best of all, karamatsu is (seemingly) simple. and thats what she wants right now, a simple and easy and fun time. no baggage, no grand status quo changes, no needless effort. just a little fun with a guy she already knows likes her.

so she approaches him one day and asks him to carry her bags for her while she goes shopping. normal enough right? so karamatsu ofc is like "oh yeah i think i'm free but my brothers might be busy" and totoko's like "oh that's fine, you don't have to bring them" and karamtsu just says "sounds good, see you tomorrow!"

he walks home and it doesn't really hit him until he gets there... totoko chan just invited him somewhere to do something with him... alone.

but she's done that before! she asked if he wanted to watch her at her driving school, which he did alone. heh... it seems totoko is not a karamatsu girl yet, but he thinks he can win her over after tomorrow.

ok so i have more ideas for this, but honestly i don't really think theres an audience for karatoto but lmk if you guys are interested to hear the rest.

[zaundads]

Sorry that I haven't been posting for a while, I gave myself a tumblr timeout while I try to force myself to fiinish at least one fic. It's not posted. I started this way back in season 1 long before the miner backstory or time travel hijinks were established within the show.

Silco travels back in time to sleep with a younger version of Vander. One from before the betrayal, one who hasn't even met Silco yet.

the room upstairs by Arcane_ish Explicit, 3,549 Silco travels back to the past to seeks out Vander. A younger Vander from before he's even met Silco. One thing leads to another. ~~~~ Vander’s gaze flickers across his expensive vest. “You a Piltie?” he asks in a cocky drawl. “Wandered down here looking for adventure and got lost?” Silco throws down Vander’s drink without blinking. “Do I sound like one?”

I've also tried to catch up with my reading, so here a mixture of stuff I have enjoyed.

Longer:

These are the main WIPs I follow.

Lords of Zaun by juurensha A fic about how Silco and Vander made up after Silco found the letter with a very angry and bossy Silco, but Vander thinks that that is hot.

River Water by runrarebit An ABO fic, unwanted pregnancies, Viktor as Vander and Silco's bio child, delicious misunderstandings and fainting alphas.

I also have my eye on and have started: Only Zaun's Future Is Ours To Be Changed by Alishatheninth

Also a time travel age difference fic (but a lot more plotty than mine). I took a break when oh no, the season 1 plot is invading, I'm not ready for the heartbreak, I just wanna keep reading whacky angsty timetravel shenanigans. But I have been hearing rumblings of how things continue and I have plans to go back to it and finish it.

Spicy/Explicit:

haunting by aelandair I think there are a couple of "Silco and Vander start hooking up angrily after Silco finds the letter, but Silco has conditions" and this one is just perfectly executed. Poor Vander who so badly wants to touch Silco again and it to to keep his hands to himself.

Dogs of Progress by Faetality sweet making up in the AU verse and just the right dose of angst and snark for me.

With Kid Gloves by illmetkismet for sigilmint think this has been reblogged here before with the art, Vander disovers he has a leather kink after he sees Silco with sexy leather gloves.

Other stuff/wips where I don't think where they are going, but I like the setup:

Family Vacation by Ringmaster_kaja11 modern AU, divorced dads, chaotic family and a shared vacation

A Family Shattered by BlueSunnyTime regency AU, why has Vander left Silco and run off with Vi? Featuring Silco dancing with Singed to make Vander jealous.

I have read more (ie the smutty tales from GenGonGinGun, the dead dove from tardigrape) but those are some that stuck to my mind recently.

What are you reading? What are your wips of choice? What zaundads fic or fic concept has really stuck with you recently?

Got any recs for deep "how they won after reuniting in the AU"? Any cute kid Zaundads meeting each other? Miner love? Sexy Silco/Warwick brainrot? Angsty deep character exploration? Any great "how people handle Vi's death" in the AU or "Ekko finding out about Zaundad's past"?

[jewish-vents]

I've been terrified of representing myself as Israeli for years. I remember when I decided to change an original story me and my friends came up with to be set in Israel to better reflect it being about us, I got so nervous I sent so many asks to blogs asking if it's *ok* and if I'm *allowed* to have a magical girl series set in Israel

I eventually decided not to be so scared, to actually make characters in Israel that represent me and my friends because I want Jewish representation in a genre that has basically none. I thought I could get by because my original ideas set in Israel seemed to be met with a lot of love from other Israelis, which I deeply appreciate

But now, as I'm looking to publish a fanfiction and maybe even make it a comic, I looked at the fandom

And the first person I saw was someone posting about Palestine in a fandom space and then saying they don't support AO3 because it's "Zionist"

I got hit with that same feeling from years back. I had planned to make the main character in my fic Israeli, because she is inspired by my background of being an Israeli born who lived in America for a while. It's a topic and representation that's important to me and it informed so much of the character, a character I'm now very attached to

And now I'm scared again. Scared that if I publish this, I'll get hate for my main character being Israeli. For that aspect of her character being so important. I'm scared. I'm terrified I'll get death threats or be driven out of yet another fandom

I feel like I once again have to ask the world for permission to be Israeli

.

[1313ablackcat1313]

The Major Arcana: What It Means To Me

The Major Arcana Cards in your tarot deck are the main character cards numbered 0-21. These cards are important as they set the tone for your entire tarot reading, they even set the intent as there are spreads you can do with each of your major arcana cards if you don't have an intent already set in your mind. Think of the Major Arcana as the overall meaning of your reading and the Minor Arcana as the little details or bits of information to gain insight into what the Major Arcana are telling you.

The Major Arcana cards are important as they teach you lessons. Divination is something you are pulled to do, I don't believe in the old wives tales of a deck of tarot cards needs to be gifted to you. In my world I don't gate keep. I welcome everyone to come and read this and learn things and offer their own feedback.

Tarot cards can be used for divination purposes, but they can also give you more insight into your life and what you're going through. They are good tools to learn about what you need to work through and accomplish.

Tarot cards can also be used to gain more information or insight into situations that are plaguing you or if you're curious about a variety of subjects. For example, I like to read about true crime cases, but usually I just read for whatever pulls me.

All of these meanings below are my OWN interpretations of the cards. There are many sources online and other tarot readers who have written down meanings over the years. Please don't get lost in the sauce and think that one set of tarot interpretations are the correct ones. While yes, most of the sites and other tarot readers have come to a general consensus of what the cards mean in a nut shell, you have to learn what the cards mean to you, the reader. 

When you pick up The Fool and look at it, what do you see? How does it make you feel? What do the pictures mean? What does the meaning online or in a book mean to you?

Using your own intuition to interpret the cards is one of the hardest skills to develop while learning tarot. Don't become too focused on the keywords because then you'll end up taking the cards meanings way too literally. Instead, get the gist of what the cards mean, and then exercise your ability to feel what they mean to you and how you read them.

Keywords are fine to help you learn about the cards while you're learning tarot, but try not to get in the habit of relying on them too much. This is how every tarot reader sort of has their own style of reading. What The Fool means to me, might not be how another tarot reader thinks of it.

Some misconceptions about tarot reading are that you have to be a witch, or practice Wicca. Tarot is for everyone who wants to pick up a deck. You can practice Wicca and read tarot, but you don't have to do one to do the other. Another misconception is that tarot cards are demonic. They're little pieces of card board with pictures printed on them. Nothing about a deck of cards is demonic. You're not talking to evil spirits, you're connecting with spirit guides and Angels. Of course you can always protect yourself by praying, asking for guidance and knowledge from your spirit guides and always remember to thank them after you're done reading. Another misconception is that you have to be a psychic to read tarot. This is in untrue, however I do believe that psychics can use tarot cards as wonderful tools to help them interpret and gain insight onto what they're feeling, hearing, or seeing. I don't consider myself a psychic at all, but I do have strong intuitional pulls. I enjoy learning about astrology and have other occult interests. If you're pulled to learn tarot, I encourage you to buy a deck of cards and start practicing.

I feel like I am probably going to end up posting a chapter about my thoughts and opinions on toxic tarot Tik Tokers or youtubers, because I feel like there is a lot of unnecessary gate keeping going on with in this community.

With all of that being said for now, here are my own interpretations and my own thoughts on and feelings on what the Major Arcana Cards mean to me:

0. The Fool: Upright: I always think of this card as a naive youth, either a child or a teenager stepping foot out into the real world for the first time. No real commitments, no world experience. These "kids" as I like to call them are beginning a new journey in life. An example would be a teenager leaving home and living on their own for the first time at 18 or 19. You're about to have new experiences and experience those new things for the first time. Reversed: Whenever I see The Fool reversed it gives me the vibe that this person thinks they know more than what they actually do, but it's almost never toxic, its due to being naive in the world and having lack of experience. The card can also represent being reckless and impulsive and not really paying attention to what you're doing. It can represent being irresponsible and not really caring about it.

1. The Magician: Upright: I like to think of this card as a person who gets what they want, or they have all the tools necessary to get what they want. They're very charismatic people who light up every room they walk into. They're very well spoken. They seem to know what to do and say in every situation. They know the steps to take and the actions to take to get what they need to get done. This could also mean someone who is creatively skilled in the arts of painting, making, writing. The Magician is hands on creativity. Reversed: To me, The Magician reversed seems like a person who feels jaded. Who feels like they've worked so hard for everything but get little to nothing in return. This person is introverted, and often needs help or a little push to get things done. I also believe that The Magician reversed is a more exaggerated version of The Magician upright. This person is driven by ego, but they don't know what they're talking about. They're charismatic and outspoken, but it's often manipulative or it sounds smart, but its with little substance. 

2. The High Priestess: Upright: Whenever I see this card I always think of someone who is spiritually gifted and who vibrates on a higher level. This person can be psychic, clairvoyant, have strong intuition. These people are often pulled to read tarot cards or often pulled to study astrology and birth charts. These people have strong gut instincts that are usually right. I tend to think these people can see through a lot of "bs." They're smart and they're in touch with other realms and spirit guides. Reversed: When I see The High Priestess reversed, depending on what the other cards around it look like, I get the feeling that this person is a little dramatic with their "gut feelings," meaning everything is a sign, every little emotion is an intuitional pull or a gut feeling. I think of it as sort of like a fake psychic. It's misuse of intuition, or biased use of intuition. This card reversed also represents what you're keeping in, must come out now. Lies are being revealed, people are being exposed, etc. or psychic visions are becoming more clearer and make sense.

3. The Empress: Upright: This card always makes me think of a good mother, a good caregiver, usually someone who is female. This card represents nurturing, kindness, beauty, femininity, womanhood, girlhood, abundance. This represents nature producing fruit, woman baring children. To me this card has strong female energy, and it's pure and kind-hearted. This could also mean someone who is highly creative or skilled artistically. Reversed: Just as the upright version means a good mother, the reversed version means bad mother, mommy issues, a bad caregiver, a neglectful mother. This also makes me think of like a narcissistic mother, manipulative woman, infertility, etc. On a creative note, this could simply mean things like creative block, writer's block, felling uninspired to create. I wouldn't take The Empress reversed and run with it and call everyone woman who gets that card reversed a narcissistic, neglectful mother. Remember, you have to take in account the entire read, what your intentions are, and how you feel about it.

4. The Emperor: Upright: Just like The Empress, this card makes me think of someone who is usually a male. Where The Empress is the caregiver, The Emperor is the provider. This card makes me think of a good father, a good man, a faithful husband. Someone who rules with power, but not toxic power. Someone who is a natural born leader. People respect this person and take this person seriously. Reversed: Similarly, just the same as The Empress, The Emperor reversed can sometimes represent a bad dad, neglectful dad, or daddy issues. The Emperor reversed can also point to a person being a toxic leader, too bossy, or controlling. Someone who has little to no flexibility or doesn't easily bend to the will of others. It can also represent an explosive temper and rage.

5. The Hierophant: Upright: To me, The Hierophant represents a religious person, or a group of religious people. This card can show up representing your religious faith, or perhaps religious people around you. This card can also represent marriage, living a conventional life style, having a traditional home and life with a man and a woman. This card can represent going to church or being involved with a church or a religion. This card can also represent someone who needs to be listened to or someone's advice who needs to be taken. Reversed: When I see this card reversed it gives me the vibe that someone is LGBTQ+, non traditional, goes against the grain, rebellious, doesn't have religion, etc. The card screams, non-conformity. They think how they want to think and don't let religion or traditional values dictate how they live their life. It can also show someone who is being forced to conform to society's norms.

6. The Lovers: Upright: The Lovers card to me represents a happy and wonderful relationship. It can also represent a wonderful friendship, partnership, etc. depending on what your intent is for the reading. When I see The Lovers card, I often get the feeling of a strong connection between two people. This could also represent a decision needing to be made or two choices presenting to you or even two ways of thinking. Reversed: When The Lovers is reversed it can mean a few different things. It could mean incompatibility between two people, if this is a romantic relationship it could suggest you're not right for each other. It could represent heartbreak, cheating, stress, breaking up, incompatibility. It can also represent you not making a choice, or having no choices, and in the worst of cases it can represent someone in your life being two-faced.

7. The Chariot: Upright: To me The Chariot represents things moving at a fast pace. It represents progress being made quickly. If doing the Celtic Cross reading and this card shows up in the 4 or 6 position, whatever it is will pass or go with a quickness. This card can also show you literally moving, such as with travel or driving. Sometimes I see this card in a reading and interpret it as a hasty decision being made, almost impulsively. Reversed: The Chariot reversed means a sudden stop, or a slow progress. It's taking you a while to get over something, perhaps you're overthinking something or it's just taking you longer than  usual to figure something out. This could also be literal in the sense that your travel plans get canceled or your car breaks down. There are obstacles in your path that you need to take care of before you can move on or before your progress can continue. Whenever I see this card in a reading I always think of it as the person I'm reading for is stuck, or has a mental block or something is going on in their life that has them preoccupied.

8. Strength: Upright: Strength not only means strength, but it also means needing strength, being strong willed, being passionate and driven. This will show up in readings to tell you that you are strong and will overcome any obstacles that might get in your way. This can also represent you being strong for others or standing up for others. Depending on the Minor Arcana surrounding your strength card, it can show you being strong in situation in your life or it can show you need strength for an upcoming problem or situation you are about to face. Reversed: When I see Strength reversed in a reading I tend to think that this person is in desperate need of strength. I tend think of self-sabotage, or feeling vulnerable. Shaky knees, anxiety, being scared of not being accepted or welcomed. Not having confidence in yourself. In worst case scenarios, depending on the context of the read, it reminds me of someone being a coward or not wanting to stand up for others.

9. The Hermit: Upright: To me, The Hermit represents someone who is an introvert, who is quiet and in their shell. They have a lot of thoughts and opinions but they tend to keep them to themselves. I also believe that The Hermit is underrated, because when push comes to shove, I believe he shows others the way even though it's dark and dimly lit. On The Hermit card an old man in robes is pictured, carrying a lit lantern in front of him as if he's lighting up a dark path. I take this as showing others the way even though it's difficult and hard to see. The Hermit can sometimes mean a reality check is in store, or that the truth might be harsh, but it needs to be said. The Hermit can also represent self-reflection, searching your subconscious and becoming self-aware. You might have to admit to yourself harsh truths about your life and yourself. Reversed: When reversed, The Hermit becomes more withdrawn and collapses into their shell. This is ultimate reservedness. This is becoming such a recluse that it's a problem in your personal life. You are ruled by paranoia and fear. Your thoughts are too much. It makes me think of an extremely shy person, or an extremely soft spoken person. Sort of afraid to come out into your own light. This could also represent not wanting to talk about past traumas because you don't want to re-open the wounds or deal with the wounds in the first place. 

10. The Wheel of Fortune:  Upright: This card to me represents fate, luck, and karma. I think of The Wheel as what goes up, must come down or what comes around goes around. I think seeing The Wheel of Fortune in a reading might suggest karma is coming your way - good or bad. I also think this card represents fate, good luck, and bad luck. Sometimes when doing true crime reads, I get the Wheel and it always feels like to me that this wasn't karma related, this was fate. This was just the card that The Universe drew for this person. There's no real reason as to why this happened or what caused it. It was truly a random act of violence. This card will also show up in my experience with a lot of celebrity readings. Fame, fortune, riches - all the good luck parts of The Wheel. Just remember to put good out into The Universe so that it comes back to you. Reversed: When The Wheel is reversed it means bad karma, a bad card drawn by The Universe. Whenever I see The Wheel reversed I always think someone has what they got coming. It is bad luck, upheaval, bad karma, chaos, unwelcome change.

11. Justice:  Upright: The Justice card can represent someone who is a lawyer, involved in the law, police, a judge, having legal issues, having to go to court, and it can also represent karmic justice. Every time I see this card, I always get the feeling its about law and order in the spiritual sense. You're reading for your ex and he cheated on you? You ended up with The Wheel of Fortune reversed and Justice next to each other? That's what I'm talking about, his bad karma is going to catch up with him, and then there is Justice to confirm it for you. That's what I always feel when I see this card, now, that also depends on what Minor Arcana cards are around and it depends on the intent of your reading. I've gotten the Justice card for a lot of true crime readings I've done. Justice can be literal in the sense of jail, court, lawyers, being sued, but I also believe fully that it means Justice in the spiritual sense too. Reversed: Whenever I see the Justice card reversed in a tarot reading, I always tend to think its injustice. Someone got away with something, or Justice is coming for them slowly, perhaps building up momentum before it hits them. This card can also represent being lied to or someone getting away with lying. On the flipside, this card can also mean vindication. Someone who was falsely accused and is being vindicated. I've also gotten the vibe that Justice reversed can mean corruption with in law and order, judges, and police.

12. The Hanged Man: Upright: Whenever I see The Hanged Man, I almost always get the feeling that it represents self-sabotage in a way. It's meaning is having difficulty letting go, which could be your feelings about certain things, how you acted in a situation, grief, a bad relationship, etc. This card is also about feeling trapped. So you might want to speak up on your behalf or you might want to leave a certain situation, but you're trapped in your own mind and making excuses for yourself. These situations can often be lessons we need to learn. I always think that The Hermit and The Hanged Man go hand in hand, but that's just my opinion and how I interpret the cards for myself. Reversed: When The Hanged Man is reversed, I sometimes think of it as someone finally being able to let go, but they become numb and detached. It's like going though a break up and living life on auto-pilot with out really dealing with your emotions around it. It's apathy and not really caring anymore. Losing interest in the things you used to love and losing interest in familial relationships and romantic relationships.

13. Death: Upright: Death very rarely means actual or literal death. Death represents the shedding of something old. This card represents finally letting go. Now I usually get Death in a literal sense when reading for true crime, but Death almost never represents that in day to day reads. To me Death represents a situation that I shouldn't revisit, be it a friendship, a relationship, a situation, an old job, etc. Death can also mean the end of a tarot reading where no other information can be obtained. Death also represents rebirth. The old you had to die so the new you could flourish. It can be sudden change in beliefs when represented with new information as well. Your old beliefs die so your new beliefs can flourish and blossom. Reversed: When Death shows up reversed it often shows your inability to move on or let something go. This is showing that you're resisting the change, you don't want it to happen, but you have to. This card gives me the vibe of knowing you have to do something to create change in your life, but you keep just putting it off or you're not really thinking about it deeply. This is also the card of not learning from your past and you keep repeating your mistakes over and over again. 

14. Temperance: Upright: Temperance is a hard one for me to get a good grasp on. The card itself represents an Angel. I guess in some sense it makes me think of God and Heaven. It makes me think of tolerance and grace. Forgiveness. The meaning online suggests it means patience, love, serenity, compromise. It's peace and tranquility. This card also represents the meaning of "time heals all wounds." Reversed: When Temperance shows up reversed it can often mean intolerance, the lack of the ability to gain perspective and being impatient with others. It's being rigid and stuck in your ways, or stubborn. 

15. The Devil: Upright: To me The Devil represents numerous things. It could be as innocent as representing someone who is of the zodiac sign Capricorn, or it can be as nefarious as suggesting someone or yourself is a toxic, manipulative person. The Devil can also represent addiction to drugs, mental health problems, feeling chained or trapped to a toxic person. This card can also represent feeling hopeless or powerless in your addiction or mental health issues. It can represent feeling hopeless or powerless against The Devil - or the person who has you shackled figuratively. This card makes me think of toxic power dynamics. One partner is more dominant and controlling than the other, and the submissive partner feels as if they can't speak up or can't escape because they feel the weight of the ball of chain on their ankle. This could be as simple as being at a job that makes you feel like speaking up for yourself is a bad thing or it could be as bad as a domestic violence situation in a relationship. Again, it depends on what your intent for the reading is, what the minor arcana cards are suggesting, and how you feel in your intuition. I feel like people get The Devil card and run with it and start suggesting things about others and accusing them of being narcissists or abusive. So please pay attention to what you feel and what you see in your entire spread before becoming overly concerned. Reversed: Whenever I see The Devil reversed in a reading I often think of someone breaking through the chains. Finding themselves, no longer letting people control them, finally standing up for themselves. I think of sobriety, I think of getting help for mental health issues. The Devil reversed is such a good card to get if you've been seriously struggling. I think of people getting out of abusive relationships. The main meaning of this card is breaking the chains, and that's exactly the best way I can describe it. It the means to an end of suffering.

16. The Tower: Upright: Nobody wants The Tower in their readings. Nobody. Unfortunately, The Tower is something we all must experience at least once in our lives. To me The Tower represents complete destruction. Whether its good or bad is also dependent on what's going on in your life. The Tower can represent anything from the destruction of your old way of life or thinking to something as bad as the destruction of everything and everyone around you. You can't fight this change. This change is coming whether you like it or not. I always think of The Tower in one of two ways: Either its a destruction of an old way of life or old thoughts or beliefs, meaning you thought one way for a very long time about something incredibly important in your life, but once presented with new facts or learning about something else, it completely shifts your point of view, or it's complete chaotic and upheaval of your entire life. A break up, a house fire, a car accident, tragedies, loss, pain. This is when The Tower is bad, because it's going to break you completely. The Tower shows up a lot in my true crime readings both for the victim and shockingly for the criminal as well. It makes sense when you think that what the criminal did to the victim broke the family and what the criminal did to themselves destroyed their life. The Tower represents deep emotional pain and grief. As I said before it will break us, but Towers get rebuilt. The Universe wouldn't break you and not put you back up. The pain and grief we experience with The Tower is meant as a lesson that we are supposed to learn from. This is about pain and being broken, but fixing what is broken and learning from it. Reversed: When I see The Tower reversed I think of people who are doing whatever they can to avoid The Tower collapsing. It's stubbornly holding onto a set of beliefs because you're scared to find out the truth about things, it's doing everything to avoid a break up that needs to happen. It's lying to yourself and making up excuses as to why can't leave certain situations. It's desperate, anxious, fear of losing your old sense of reality or life. You have to remember though, you are delaying the inevitable. This is set in The Stars and this will happen whether you like it or not. On the flipside, The Tower reversed can also show you averting disaster or tragedy, but I think of this more in the physical sense of taking a different road while you're driving and then learning there was a major accident on the road you would have taken, or you don't board the plane that crashed, especially if The Wheel of Fortune upright is there.

17. The Star: Upright: To me The Star kind of represents someone with a big ego, or someone with a big head. They crave attention and recognition for their accomplishments. This card makes me think of the popular kids in school. They're nice and outgoing, but they're always trying to keep up with their image. With that being said, this card is generally a really positive one. I think it represents showing drive and ambition for completing your projects and wanting the recognition for your hard work, which is well deserved. This card can also represent in healing, hope, and happiness. Reversed: When The Star is reversed I often think of someone who is bored or ambitionless. They have little to no hope their life is going to get better. They want to be extroverted and outspoken and be able to accomplish their goals, but they have lack of faith in themselves and self-sabotage themselves and tell themselves they can't do that or accomplish that. 

18. The Moon: Upright: To me, sometimes The Moon gives me the vibe that this person could be a fledgling psychic. Someone who is just getting started with tarot or astrology. Their intuition or psychic abilities are a little fuzzy, but they're there. They may not have confidence yet in their abilities. This card can also represent having anxiety or being worried about something coming out. This could be lies you've been telling, lies someone has been telling to you, or not wanting to deal with the problems in your life that bug your subconscious. You know they're there, but you are lying to yourself and pretending its not as bad as what it seems. Whenever I see The Moon in a reading, depending on what the other cards are saying, I always think to myself, "what are you hiding from people?" In a situational spread, it might mean things look one way, but it's not what it seems. Your friend might seem or look shady, but that's not what is actually happening. This card also can sometimes represent PTSD, or past conditioning being responsible for how you handle situations or how you react emotionally.  Reversed: When The Moon is reversed I always think of information coming out or lies being exposed. What was in the dark will now come to light. It's also releasing your anxiety and healing. The Moon reversed also makes me think of the fledgling psychic finally seeing their visions in full view, or finally understanding what these random signs or little intuitional pulls are about and what they're for. 

19. The Sun:  Upright: My interpretation of The Sun is pure, warm joy. It's feeling true happiness, its being successful, but usually in my reads, The Sun always shows up for me representing children. The pure joy and innocence that children have. The Sun could also be an indicator that someone is expecting a child or just had a new baby. It represents to me the pure emotions that little children have. That's the only way I can describe it. Whenever I get this card, it just overwhelmingly feels childlike to me. Reversed: To me when I get The Sun reversed its usually in a reading that involves a child who had a sad childhood or a bad childhood. Sometimes it will pop up for a woman who has had a miscarriage or a stillbirth. I know in some true crime readings I have done, it specifically points to the child who was a victim of the crime. I've always interpreted it as a loss of childhood or maybe someone who had to grow up too fast, or maybe someone who had their childhood stolen from them forcefully. It can also represent someone who has lost a child from natural causes or a crime.

20. Judgement: Upright: Judgement to me has always felt as a finality. You had a situation, you figure out what caused the situation, and then you get the Judgement card meaning, that situation is done. Judgement can also represent things like being judged, judging others, court, law, police, a decision you need to make. Sometimes this card asks you to take a step back, look at the whole situation for what it is, and make a call. This could also represent something being your last chance to make a decision on, so you better get on it. Reversed: When I see the Judgement card reversed, I almost always get the feeling that this person is way too judgmental. They're making snap judgments on people based on very small bits of information. They could be leaning into a prejudice or a bias about someone. They could be impulsive with their decision making. Judgment reversed can also represent malicious gossip, defamation of character, or being too harsh on someone.

21. The World: Upright: This card to me has always felt so warm and welcoming. It is the success and accomplishment of your goals. It can represent starting a family, it could represent how you feel about your family. It's a sense of belonging, "having a place in the world." It's good physical and mental health. This card also means the end and healing.  Reversed: When The World is reversed it could mean not meeting your goals, it can represent a bad home life, a neglectful family. It can be feeling left out or not welcome. When I see The World upside down in a reading, I get overwhelming sense of sadness or animosity. It feels like the person is jaded, or upset or resents someone. It could also mean the loss of everything, or extreme grief. Below I included a little bit of astrology for you because I feel as if it's important to helping interpret what your Major Arcana cards might be telling you. I've noticed for myself that when a reading is trying to help me pick up on specific person it will drop me hints such as their astrological sign or their astrological sign's element.

Elements can also help you get a feel or a mood about a reading:

Element of Fire: Suit of Wands - lots of action and doing things, taking initiative Element of Earth: Suit of Pentacles - wealth, stability, the physical world and material world, based in reality Element of Air: Suit of Swords - mentality, intellect, communication, making decisions Element of Water: Suit of Cups - emotions, psychic realms, divination, the spiritual world

The Emperor: Aries - Fire The Hierophant: Taurus - Earth The Lovers: Gemini - Air  The Chariot: Cancer - Water Strength: Leo - Fire  The Hermit: Virgo - Earth  Justice: Libra - Air  Death: Scorpio - Water  Temperance: Sagittarius - Fire The Devil: Capricorn - Earth The Star: Aquarius - Air The Moon: Pisces - Water