#Also I really thought about the TV show thing

[cobaltperun]

Jerks With Hearts of Gold - Work For It

Request: Tara Carpenter x Female Reader

Summary: The first kiss should not be this difficult to get, yet nothing is ever easy for Tara Carpenter.

Masterlist / Side story of this request

Word count: 2.7k

She could no longer deny it, she could no longer fight it, and she hated every single thing about it. Except she didn't actually hate it, she absolutely loved it, only she would never admit it, especially to anyone other than herself.

Tara Carpenter was in love with a jerk.

How could this have happened? Sure, she wanted to live her life, set aside everything that's happened while being comfortably cautious about which people she let in, but she did not expect to let the biggest jerk of them all in. And if that wasn’t bad enough, she took it not just a step, but a fucking marathon further by falling in love with you. So, there Tara was, lying on her bed facing the ceiling and glaring at it as if she had your face painted right on it. She might as well have it painted there, because that's all she could see when she closed her eyes. Your smiling face, that stupid grin when you prove her wrong, or when you get the upper hand in a debate, or when you just annoy the living hell out of her.

“Jerk,” she muttered as she looked through window that was somehow facing the direction you were in. Of course, you were far away, too far for her to even see your neighborhood from her window, let alone your apartment, but just the fact that she knew she would be looking in the direction of your apartment if she looked outside her window infuriated her. Why did you have to be so good to her? You stopped smoking just for her, and that really was the true start of her downfall. But you couldn’t stop there, could you? Ever since she opened up about the attacks she survived you've been crazy attentive to everything she was feeling, noticing even the minute details about her mood shifts.

Somehow, despite only knowing you for a relatively short period of time, Tara was absolutely certain you wouldn’t turn out to be a Ghostface. Maybe worse than even that was how sure Tara was that if she confessed and you returned her feelings that the two of you would just stay together. That you would never break her trust or her heart.

And that just made her afraid that one day she would do that to you. Because there was that feeling deep inside of her, that thought that maybe she did ruin everything she touched, and that she just wouldn’t know how to let you love her.

Yet at the same time, Tara knew she wanted that kind of love, that almost unconditional love, more than she wanted anything in the world. So, Tara picked up her phone and sent you a message.

~X~

You were bored beyond what you imagined was humanly possible. You were so bored you might actually consider doing schoolwork that was still far from the deadline. That's how bored you were. You weren't in the mood for a movie or some new TV show or a new book or anything that would reasonably take more than a few hours to finish, but you also weren't in the mood to go out and have fun, or go to a stupid party if Tara wasn’t there, or anything of that nature.

Luckily, just as you were about to lament on your ruined night, your phone rang and you jumped to your feet cheering loudly that there was even a smidge of distraction to be had tonight.

You placed your palms together in front of your face praying to whatever higher being that might exist. “Please be Tara, please be Tara, please let me annoy her tonight!” because you would not be that desperate to actually send the message first. Not after sending the first message four times in a row.

You plucked your phone off your charger and the screen lit up and you pumped your fist at your side. “Yes!” you exclaimed. It was Tara. “Oh, I love this girl!” your eyes widened when you said that.

Well, you did love her, and you knew that, and you knew how you loved her, how much, and how intensely. But you haven't really said it out loud and with that sudden realization the urge to annoy her faded away and you just opened the message she just sent you.

Tara: Let's meet up tomorrow

Please I'm bored

Well, that was direct and right to the point, just the way Tara always was, and you grinned like a fool because you would get to see her tomorrow instead of waiting for the next week's classes. So, you replied with a simple ‘Of course! Usual time usual place?’

It took Tara less than a minute to reply, and you've never thought a simple ‘yes’ would make you this happy.

You walked back to the bed and just fell on top of it, still grinning. You loved this girl. You loved her so damn much and she didn't even know it and maybe, just maybe you could confess tomorrow. Just see how it goes. At least you won't be painfully stuck in friendzone and things would be clear, you would know if you should give up on these feelings or if you would just have to wait for some time until she got more comfortable. You understood perfectly well just how difficult opening up would be for Tara, and all you really wanted was to know if there was even the slightest chance that she might one day reciprocate your feelings.

~X~

She must have done something right lately because all of a sudden and without even considering all of those things Tara ended up being really lucky. First of all, she didn't have classes today, Sam was working, and all of her friends had classes, so no one was free to hang out with her. Not even Chad and he was the most relaxed about classes out of all of them. At least before the exams, once the exams were going then he was the one worrying the most.

That would probably be something you and Chad could bond over. You had the same annoying nonchalant approach before the exams only to completely flip it once exams actually started. She still smiled, because somehow, despite everything, she found that endearing.

The usual spot was your code of sorts, for a small secluded spot in the park that Tara found when she first came to New York, back when she felt the need to escape from everything and pretend she was just a normal teenager. And you came to appreciate the spot as well, so instead of hanging out in a café bar or some other place, one of you would get the drinks and the other some snacks and you just go and sit at the park. And it worked well, because not only was it a nice place where she could breathe easier, but it had designated spots for picnic, so that was just another plus in its own way.

Her heart was hammering in her chest as she walked through the park toward the place where you would meet up. The basket filled with your favorite food felt a lot heavier than it really was. You weren't really a flowers kind of girl, or rather Tara wasn't, she just felt that would be a bit too on the nose and she wants to be a bit subtle about everything. Although… There was nothing subtle about being twenty minutes early.

She picked a good spot for the picnic. The one with a nice shade, far enough from the people walking through the park, and light fresh breeze blowing through her hair bringing in the scent of the flowers blooming in the park.

“Guess we are both early,” Tara jumped when she heard your voice and flipped around to see you standing there sheepishly rubbing the back of your head, all the while holding a bag filled with a couple of bottles of probably juice if she had to guess. You were kind of boring like that, not really consuming alcohol, but she guessed that would make Sam like you more because you weren't some party animal.

“Damn it, you scared me!” Tara put her hand over her chest trying to calm her heart rate down. Getting scared was not one of her plans for the day!

Your eyes widened and immediately she could see the guilt on your face. “I'm sorry! I should have texted you or something, I just didn't want you to rush if you weren't here and-“ you facepalmed, you didn’t forget about anything, you just got eager to see her and she wasn’t expecting you. “God, I'm such a fool for scaring you like that!” there you were being the caring, gentle dumbass she fell in love with.

Tara smiled widely, unable to restrain her reaction. “Hey, it's fine, come on, let's just sit down and start this again, OK? Shit, look at us,” Tara laughed as you joined her, still looking at her apologetically. “We're like two teenagers trying to go on their first date instead of hanging out as friends,” she chastised herself and you to an extent because you were both nervous and she couldn't wrap her head around why you were nervous. She was the one who intended to confess her love for you… unless…

No, that couldn't be right.

The two of you knelt down on the blanket and began taking things out of the bag you brought, and the basket Tara brought. “You really went all out! And it's all homemade!” you commented, and Tara just knew you could see the blush on her face.

You only complimented her cooking, once granted she only cooked for you once, and ever since then has been practicing, wanting to impress you once more.

“I just grabbed the leftovers,” of course she wasn’t going to tell you the truth. She would die of embarrassment if that happened, but you knew, you probably knew every single time she uttered a ridiculous lie just to save face.

You snorted at that. “Of course, of course, I wouldn't dare to imply the great Tara Carpenter would prepare food for an occasion this beneath her,” you laughed and despite the joke you just said something just didn't feel right about it. It annoyed Tara more than she ever imagined it would. She just hated that there was a certain sense of self-deprecation within your voice.

So, Tara reached up, grabbed you by the chin and pulled you closer. “Don't you dare ever think that,” she leaned in, intending to kiss you and get all of this confession bullshit out of the way, and just show you how she felt instead. But then you smirked and pulled away from her and her hand was just left hanging in the air, empty, while her lips remained stuck, slightly pursed as she intended to kiss you.

“Work for it, Carpenter,” you did not just say that. You did not just deny her of the kiss she wanted for so damn long.

“What the fuck?!” Tara just stared. You actually did that to her. “Work for it? How do I- I mean- You know-“ she paused, taking a deep breath. “Was I reading this all wrong,” she gestured between the two of you. “And you actually don’t feel the same way? Y/N, I can take it if you don't feel the same way, I'm not some-“

You interrupted her by placing the tip of your finger on her lips and snickering and now she was just confused. “I do feel the same way, I love you too, Tara,” you said it so easily even if she didn't, even if she wasn't all that sure she could say those three words anytime soon, despite how genuinely she felt them. “I just want you to work for the kiss. You've been a pain in my eyes for so long, I deserve this!” you laughed and took a bite of the sandwich she so carefully prepared, choosing all the ingredients you loved, and here you were saying she had to work for the kiss.

“What do you even mean by work? How?! Tell me how?!” she demanded red in the face from the anger and the embarrassment and because she was denied of what she wanted and like a petulant child that was suddenly rejected she was just about ready to throw a tantrum.

And that wasn't like her. She was denied so many things as a child, it wasn't in her nature to throw a temper tantrum, yet with you she really felt like that. She felt like the way you were loving her, even when you were just friends, was allowing that child within her to come out for perhaps the first time in her entire life.

“Ask for it, you can’t just take it,” you winked at her. “Come on, now, Tara, all you have to do is ask,” oh, you were enjoying this. You got your victory. You knew she felt the same way that you did before you even uttered a single word and here you were eating it all up like the menace you were.

“I'm just not gonna do it,” Tara pouted and refused to look at you even if she knew you would just shrug and keep eating the sandwich.

“Whatever works for you,” you were being way too nonchalant about this and she should have been elated that you felt the same way that she did, but this was infuriating in so many ways. Of course it had to be like this with you it couldn't be just an easy, simple confession, followed by a soft kiss, followed by a passionate kiss that would threaten to consume both of you. No, it had to be this complicated and difficult because that's who you were and that's who she was. She was Tara fucking Carpenter and every single thing in her life just had to be complicated.

Well not this time.

“Let me kiss you,” she leaned in and you burst out laughing backing away once more not allowing her to claim her reward.

“That's not how you ask, dumbass,” you just laughed and sure, fine, she could play that game too.

“I want to kiss you,” you were still leaning away and she faked a smile, speaking through gritted teeth. “Come on, Y/N, people are watching. They're looking at me leaning closer to you and you are not working with me here,” she was working hard for it and she had the right to her hard-earned reward.

“Not the magic word, Tara,” surely you weren't going to make her actually ask for it! You loved her back, why was this so complicated! She even licked her lips to tempt you, and she saw you looking down on her lips, she knew you wanted to kiss her as well! You just weren't giving in.

Fuck…

“Please, can I kiss you?” there. She asked. You smiled and didn't back away as she leaned in and that was all she needed to just go in and press her lips against yours for a heated, passionate kiss. And when she pulled back, she truly was rewarded by getting to see you being a stuttering, embarrassed mess. “Cat got your tongue?” she asked and stuck her own tongue at you, the tongue that was mere seconds ago inside of your mouth because of course she couldn't go for a soft kiss for the very first kiss. She had to be intense with everything that's included.

Especially with this because you deserved to be loved just as intensely as you loved her.

Safe to say you failed to construct a proper sentence for the next twenty or so minutes. Frankly she was impressed it only took you that long to get your composure back and actually start putting words together in a way that made sense.

[felassan]

David Gaider on Shale, under a cut for length:

"Oops! I realized I'd moved on from DAO but missed one of the companions I'd written. Which checks out, honestly, because I almost didn't write Shale and, even after I'd written her, she almost didn't happen anyhow. Then she did. Prepare yourself for... PIGEON QUEST. 🦤 So... I'm wracking my brain, but I don't recall how Shale began. I have this vague memory of us wanting a "weird" party member who didn't conform to the normal classes (this was back when Dog didn't need to be in the party), and I think my mind drifted to an old indie comic character named Concrete."

"Now, your reaction to that is probably "who?" That's OK. When I explain that HK-47 in KotOR was inspired by an old Canadian TV show called the Littlest Hobo I get the same perplexed response. ��� In short: Concrete was just a regular dude. Who happened to also be a walking hulk of rock. Cue hi-jinx. The problem here is I don't remember whether the Concrete thing was part of the original inspiration or something I thought of at the point when I started writing the character. Because I didn't, at first. That was later. Shale was initially taken on by Jay Turner, then one of our junior writers. Jay had an idea to make Shale more of a robot, an emotionless automoton killer... think HK-47, but without the layer of sarcasm. I was leery, and told Jay he'd have to be very careful. "Emotionless" can very quickly turn into "boring", after all, unless you're VERY careful. But Jay was determined. Sigh. This was a fail on my part, as his lead. There's been a couple of times in my career when I've let a junior convince me with their enthusiasm to take on something my experience said they shouldn't. And then watch their confidence crumble despite every effort I made to reassure them it was OK. This was one of those times. Jay, no idea if you'll read this but: I'm sorry. Even an experienced writer would have found that a daunting challenge. Tonia, my other Big Fail on a similar situation in DAI: I'm sorry. Both times, I should have known. You did your best, but I set you up to fail. 😔"

"Jay did his best, and this version of Shale was certainly interesting... but, when he was done, it was one of those peer reviews where every writer had that look of "I'm REALLY sorry to say this..." It felt flat. Jay tried numerous revisions, but the issue wasn't his ability - it was the concept. I only allowed my writers a certain number of tries before I take it away. This hearkens back to an earlier time at Bio when writers would hack away at something that wasn't working 6, 7, 8 times or more until finally their soul was dust. Mike Laidlaw can attest. Revision isn't always the answer. So I moved (a much relieved, I think) Jay onto something else, and the question arose: what do we do with Shale? Do we cut it? It was already very late. Then Shale dropped in my lap. I don't remember if it was me refusing to let it go or maybe Brent (Knowles, Creative Director) giving it to me. I suspect it was the latter, because I recall being a bit bitter about the whole thing. WHAT am I going to do with this character? At the time, they'd moved me out of the writers pit to instead be in a big office with the other leads. I had this corner desk by a window (yay) with an awful view (ugh) What was so awful about it? It looked out onto the neighbouring roof, where there was only an HVAC unit to see. In the winter, pigeons would gather around it. They pooped all over everything - there was this alcove around the access door, right? The pigeons roosted there and it was POOP FAUCET city."

"Not only that, the pigeons used the HVAC like some kind of sex den. Angry, ugly pigeon sex. The only respite was when a hawk would appear and the pigeons scattered. Then I'd get maybe a day when there was a single pigeon corpse, like an exploded ball of down, to act as a scarecrow. Good days, those. What does any of this have to do with Shale? Well, there's me, staring out the window trying desperately to think what I'm going to do. But I CAN'T stare out the window because, gross. But what else am I going to stare at while I think? It was making me furious. I hated those pigeons SO SO MUCH. And then it hit me: Shale is basically an animated statue, right? Something that pigeons are rather notorious for also gathering on? And so I wrote. I wrote like the angry, angry wind. I had zero time to do this so it was basically me vomiting all my annoyance at everything into a single character. Not that it helped much. There was a battle going on over Shale - first, as I recall, it was the art team. They were going to make every doorway in the game EXTRA HUGE because they were worried that Shale was too large and might clip. So, yes, let's alter the whole world to fix that. Good idea. 🙃 Eventually, they compromised by making Shale smaller. Sten-sized. Or Brent went Akira mode, but I don't really know. This was a battle happening above my level. Yet Shale got cut anyhow. There wasn't time to do her abilities and we were short on cinematics time. There was never enough time on DAO."

""Oh well," I thought. "That's that." I did what I could, but cut content is almost never resurrected. The idea was floated of making Shale into a DLC but I scoffed. Yeah, right! But... it happened. That's why the "almost" is there. Enough of the team liked Shale they made it happen this one time. This meant I could finish up the writing once we'd more or less wrapped DAO, and the rest of the team (cinematics, in particular, who were pressed the hardest for time) could move onto the Shale DLC once they were ready. It was supposed to come out well after release, but you know. Shenanigans. This particular shenanigan was EA deciding to sit on the finished DAO a few months in order to delay the release. Why? Again, not my level. To get closer to Christmas, maybe, or maybe for sim ship. It did mean Shale ended up being ready for release day. Unexpected confluence of events, honestly. Cue some fans getting upset that "cut content" was sold to them separately, which... fair, I guess? The alternative would have been that Shale was simply cut, period, and it just worked out this way but... yes, fair. This was back when DLC was the main beef of hardcore gamers. Oh, the good old days. Overall? I have a soft spot for Shale. She has no soft spot for anyone, being... you know... made of rock. It's why I put her in Asunder, and why she was also going to be in the - apparently now notorious for its Fenris murder - cancelled fourth DA novel. Also, if you're a pigeon fan: not sorry. 😇"

[source thread]

[qu0thther4ven]

Shifting Success ♡

Last night before going to bed I did a meditation on youtube and felt pretty good about it. I had tried it once the night before and it gave me crazy dreams which I associate positively with shifting. Last night I had another crazy dream. At some point during the dream I became lucid, however because the dream was so scary I didn't want to try to shift through it so I just woke up instead.

Scary dreams tend to stay in my mind, but lucid dreams always make me feel really powerful so after lucid dreaming I decided I would shift. I was sort of half asleep at the time but felt very confident that I could do it, so I just decided I would, said so, and went back to sleep.

The bad thing is that I didn't really decide where I wanted to shift to and instead because I had been thinking about that bizzare dream I had just before I wound up becoming aware of this strange reality that was like sort of related to the dream that I had just had.

Because I had lucid dreamt just before shifting I can say with complete certainty that they are entirely different things. They felt so so different, my dreams can get pretty realistic too but it's not like actual living. However shifting very much is actually living. It was such an odd experience honestly.

I woke up and I knew that I was like actually awake and not just in a dream again. I was in a bedroom that I knew distinctly was mine but was nothing like my cr room. Two of my siblings were in the room and they were the same age as me which was super weird since in my cr we are all pretty scattered age wise.

Some of the things that really confirmed it for me were my memories, comfort, and perspective. When I looked around the room I remembered random things about the items in there just like I would in my cr. The best example was when I was talking to my siblings and gathering clothes to change out of my pajamas and I distinctly remember looking through the underwear drawer of all places and looking for one of those pairs with like the day of the week on it of all things.

The fact that I not only knew that I had those without ever seeing them but also that while I was looking my mind wandered to a memory of when I went shopping with my friends and we all thought it would be funny to buy those and so we did. My mind wandering like that is something that happens to me a lot in my cr but never in my dreams.

Another thing that really struck me was the perspective. Real life as we know it is lived through first person on a day to day basis. Often in my dreams the perspective will shift rather like a tv show or movie. I can't remember a dream that I have ever had, lucid or not, where the perspective didn't shift or things didn't distort oddly. But that didn't happen to me at all, it was all real and tangible and first person the whole time.

Anyway this is getting way too long but I hope it's helped someone. After almost five years of trying (i know crazy right) I have shifted. Was it to where I wanted? no. Did I decide to come back as soon as I recognized what was going on cause I got scared? yes! but I still did it. And now I know that I am capable, and that's all I really need.

[madonnamadeofasphalt]

EA & Bioware honestly did an incredible job at killing any enthusiasm I had for a new Dragon Age. Fucking hell, man, I've played the first two games so much I could probably go through them with closed eyes and still pick all the right dialogue options to get My Exact Personally Canonized Plot. And the only reason I didn't do the same thing with DA:I is because it was made after EA completely gave up on optimizing their shit so the fucking thing takes up like a billion terabytes of disc space and takes 10 hours to download and install. I honestly think it's the best-written cRPG franchise to ever have a budget that doesn't involve a list of Kickstarter backers or getting an eccentric Estonian billionaire fixated on the project. And the gameplay is also there, I don't really care about that part.

Then they proceeded to fire all the talent that made me love those first three games, and scratch and restart the production twice, and be suspiciously cagey with any details or gameplay footage for a fucking decade, so my hype consistently went down and down. And yet I still managed to hold out some hope that somehow, by some miracle, it wouldn't fucking suck.

I kept that hope until the trailer dropped. You know the one. The one where we see a bearded Varric. This, I think, was the exact moment when I lost any desire to play fucking Veilguard.

Like, first of all, Varric being there at all is already an issue. Leave the man alone. His presence was already kinda forced in DA:I. And after DA:I and Tresspasser, his story couldn't be more finished if he got killed, eaten, shitted out, condemned to hell, redeemed by divine sacrifice, bathed for eternity in the everlasting light. There is no point to Varric anymore. Whatever arc they've given him in Veilguard, and I don't even give a shit enough to read the spoilers before writing this post, it has no business existing. Fuck you. The only reason he's there is because he's a recognizable IP, and when you're a certain kind of soulless corporate moron, you think there's nothing more important than putting a recognizable IP in whatever new bullshit you're trying to peddle. Maybe if you didn't fire every decent writer in your trash fucking company, you'd have someone to tell you about the importance of Ending The Fucking Story When The Story Fucking Ends.

But that's not even the core of the problem. Beard? they gave Varric a Beard? Varric I fucking hate everything that's even tangentially connected to dwarven culture with a passion which is why I've made a point to shave my beard all my life to spite anyone who gives a fuck about it Tethras? beard? you gave him a beard? He changed so much offscreen in the goddamn timeskip between these two games that he got a motherfucking berd? fucshhfdbeard? feadsgfsvarricafgfdh BEARD? yyousftoiuslyhhabevarricasgsfucningbeardandthivkimgosabedineditit?beard????

PS. (edit after finding out spoilers) I've gone to TV Tropes to read up on Varric's role in DATV after writing this (just in case I'm wrong and dumb, and there's actually a deeply compelling narrative reason for his presence), and, well, this shit is cheaper than I thought. And more importantly, just as I thought, there appears to be no justification for the beard beyond "adding a beard is a cliche way to show that a bunch of time has passed, and we didn't care enough to think this shit through". I'm fucking tired, man.

PPS. (edit after reading the rest of big spoilers) This is so much worse than I could even begin to suspect. This is worse than the final season of Game of Thrones. This is the final season of Game of Thrones if they straight-up fired GRRM, burned his notes and hired a showrunner who's only read a one-page summary of the first six seasons. This is fucking depressing, man. I'm genuinely fucking sad. So many subplots that were started over the course of these three games, that were clearly going somewhere, scrapped in favour of a simplistic good vs. evil story that would get rejected by fucking CD-Projekt in 2007 for being too basic. All because the artists who poured their hearts and souls into this bullshit franchise got thrown out like trash by its "owners". Morrigan's kid, the Well of Sorrows, all the implied complexities of Tevinter politics, the Crows, the Old Gods, Andraste. All went to shit. Death to capitalism.

[will80sbyers]

What do you think about the fact that Netflix changed Stranger Things from TV-14 to TV-MA?

I think they told us they would before? I feel like I've heard it from someone before either in an interview or a panel???? they said they were going to change the rating to a mature one for season 5 because they were sort of always taking it to an even scarier and more explicit level when the kids were finally grown ups and they could go full horror and gore more easily!

I guess there's gonna just be more gruesome death in the show, we know many soldiers are going to die already because of the leaks plus we know about people being attacked violently and there's gonna be lots of blood and stuff like that so there's sort of more violence involved than usual

They could also show more explicitly sexual scenes for example with Jopper, personally I don't think it's really their style to go full sexually explicit since they kind of seemed convinced that the less you kiss on screen the more powerful is the love lmao

But we'll see! In general it's good for me because I'm already an adult, a bit less for the young teens that were watching with their families before... but either way I've always thought this show was supposed to be for adults, I think there's extremely traumatic stuff in season 1 😀

Also good because there's even more reason to think that they go full explicit with the focus on the AIDS crisis... which...yes please do that, IT'S TIME 🤗

[uceyliyahh]

SOMETHING BOUT’ US

Summary: "I want you more than anything in my life." After being in a difficult relationship with Carmelo Yasmine decided to move on from him and become the next big thing while getting drafted on the smackdown roster she always thought she would never find love again due to her commitment issues until she met him.

This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED

word count: 3590

smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.

Jey Uso x Yasmine

AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.

comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍

ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.

I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios

But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽‍♀️

7.

YASMINE It was Crown Jewel day, and I was nervous to say the least about tonight's main event, which involved me going against Liv Morgan for her title. I couldn't believe that I'd be having my first PPV tonight; thinking about it gave me butterflies in my stomach.

I was in my hotel room watching TV while eating some food that I had ordered from the menu that they had in the room. I haven't heard from Jey since we last saw each other, and I started to miss him because he normally doesn't go days without texting or calling me.

That's when I felt my phone buzzing as I grabbed it from the dresser, seeing that Trinity had texted me.

Trin🤭🫶🏽 sent a message.

IMESSAGE 💬 Trin🤭🫶🏽: Hey, girly I was checking up on you to see how you were doing? Minnie🧃: I'm doing fine just nervous about today Trin🤭🫶🏽: girl, you're going to be fine just bring that title home for us Minnie🧃: Trin, you know I got'chu if you want a title shot Trin🤭🫶🏽: fasho girl I know Minnie🧃: also have you heard from Jey? Trin🤭🫶🏽: last time I check him and Jon were heading to the gym together then hangout with some friends before the show Minnie🧃: oh okay Trin🤭🫶🏽: did something happen? Minnie🧃: nah I just wanted to see if you have heard from him since he hasn't text me or called me at least Trin🤭🫶🏽: hm, that's not like him I'll see what's going on but I'll see you later girl byeee love you Minnie🧃: love you too

After texting Trinity, I decided to munch on my food while continuing to watch my show on Netflix. Jey and I have been doing this friends-with-benefits thing ever since we met.

I knew he was my person, my peacemaker, especially whenever I'm feeling down or about to panic. He's always right there to fix it, no matter what, but for some odd reason, I started to feel more for him than I should.

Maybe it was the dick that was making me feel this way about him, not knowing how he felt entirely, but it was odd not hearing from him all day today.

I'll probably see him at work or something, then we could talk about it, hopefully.

✧˚° I finally made it to work, seeing everyone that I was cool with backstage. Meanwhile, I was looking for Jey, hoping that I'd see him and greet him with hugs and kisses like I normally do.

As I was walking down toward Montez's locker room, I caught something. It was Jey speaking to Liv, for whatever reason, so I went behind the corner and watched them.

His energy seemed a bit flirty, and the way he felt up on her like he did with me almost shattered me. I sighed deeply, getting out of the corner and continuing to walk towards my brother's locker room.

Walking past them as Jey made eye contact with me before I rolled my eyes at him going towards Montez's locker room. Maybe he didn't feel the same way like I did.

As I walked in my brother's locker room I saw Bianca sitting on the couch gazing up at me with a smile as I did the same to her.

I sat down on the couch, looking up at the screen and seeing the commutators speaking about the matches for tonight. Bianca could sense my energy seemed a bit off as she nudged my shoulder.

"You okay Minks?" Bianca asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine just nervous about my match for the main event," I said while having flashbacks of seeing Jey with Liv being all up on her.

"Are you sure? You seemed pretty uncomfortable about something," I said, shaking my head and telling her that I was fine and just needed a moment by myself.

That's when I felt my phone vibrating, seeing a text from an unknown number that seemed like they had sent me a picture.

When I opened the message, it felt like my whole world had stopped spinning. It was a picture of Jey and Liv, with him having her in a back-shot position and the message saying, 'Hey, girl.' I didn't want to express those feelings toward Bianca, so I went out to the locker room for a moment, trying to calm myself down before I had a mental breakdown.

How could he? Why would he do this? I went inside the bathroom, went inside the stall, and began bawling my eyes out in silence so that nobody would hear me.

I put my trust into a nigga that would just do me dirty now everyone is going to be looking at me all weirdly.

After I was bawling my eyes out, I opened the stall and looked inside the mirror, touching up my makeup, praying that I wouldn't see him again or anymore. Ion even wanna tell Montez about it. Hell, he probably knows.

I walked out of the bathroom and toward Ms. Kim to check on my gear and make sure everything was okay. When I went that way, I saw Carmelo talking to somebody, but I didn't pay attention to him.

He saw me walking past him and tried to grab my arm, but I quickly snatched it away.

"Are you good, Yasmine? " he asked. I just rolled my eyes at him, wondering why he cared if I was okay.

I just nodded my head and walked away because I didn't want to engage in the conversation anymore. I honestly didn't want to talk to anybody.

Ms. Kim saw me walking toward her, and she smiled at me.

"Hey, Yasmine, I see that you're here for your attire?" She said.

"Yeah, I just wanted to come pick it up so that I could have it before my match," I said as she nodded her head and gave me my attire.

My eyes sparkled with excitement. I love the detail of the gear; it just suited me so well. I thanked Ms. Kim before heading back toward Montez's locker room.

✧˚° I sat in my brother's locker room, lost in thought about what I'd seen while watching the matches on his TV.

I'm still puzzled. What did I do wrong? Did he not see me as good enough? I guess it shouldn't bother me since we're friends with benefits, right?

As I watched TV, a knock on the door signaled someone to come in, but I didn't look at them until they were right in front of me.

When I looked up, I saw that it was him—the person I didn't even want to see at the moment.

My eyebrows furrowed a bit, and I sighed deeply. " What? Why are you in my face for?" I remarked, giving him an attitude.

"Let me explain, Minks," Jey begged as I rolled my eyes at him.

"There's nothing for you to explain, Josh. I thought I could trust you, and I gave my BODY to you. Is this what you do? I understand that we are friends with benefits but damn," I wanted to lash out on him so bad but it just wasn't in me I didn't need this when I have a match coming up.

I got up from the couch, not wanting to speak to him anymore when he grabbed me by the waist and looked deeply into my brown eyes.

Those same eyes that captured me hypnotized me.

"C'mon, don't do this. She doesn't mean anything to me, mama." I wanted to give in so badly, but he didn't deserve it. He can be with her instead of me.

"Let me go, Ion' have time for this. We are only friends with benefits, right? It shouldn't matter anyway; I have a match to go to." I pulled away from his grasp before going towards the gorilla, trying to pump myself up until I saw her walking past me with a smirk.

She was mouthing, "he's mine now," I wanted to knock the brains outta her so bad but I kept it professional smiling at her as her music began playing.

I had to keep my emotions together putting them to the side for right now not wanting to mess up my opportunity to take away that damn belt from her.

My music began to play as the cameraman was next me while I mouthed, "it's show time yall," while walking out the gorilla hearing the people cheering for me.

Just reminded me when I was in NXT going against Roxanne for her title, I blew kisses to everyone while skipping towards the ring.

"And her opponent from Brooklyn, New York weighing in at 148 pounds YASMINE!!!!"

I smiled at waved at everyone giving them a high five before flipping my hair in the process I know that this was getting underneath her skin.

I got on top of the ropes sitting on them while I flipped over them landing a spilt on the ground before getting back up.

"Yasmine is honestly a very talented athlete Cole,"

"I agree with you hundred percent Graves she's going to be the next face of the company,"

I took off my jacket and cap throwing it outside of the ring. I hyped myself as the referee held up the title before ringing the bell.

"1!" "2!" "3!"

"Oh my god! She did it! Yasmine is your new women's world champion!"

"She honestly deserves it,"

I was absolutely stunned when I defeated Liv Morgan. Although Dom and Jey provided some interference, I still managed to emerge victorious in a fair manner. The look of despair in Liv's eyes was evident. Perhaps this was Karma's way of teaching her a lesson, but let's not dwell on that. The referee presented me with the title, and as I held my hand, I couldn't help but feel a pang of pain in my stomach.

Hearing the crowd screaming that I deserved it made my heart warm. I blew them kisses before rolling out of the room and heading towards the gorilla.

I saw Bianca, Trinity, Montez and Jon standing there waiting on me as I walked inside they all came up to me hugging me tightly.

I cried happy tears while embracing them together; I looked up for a second, seeing Jey standing there with his arms crossed around his chest.

He seemed proud of me for what I had accomplished.

"We are honestly so proud of you, baby girl!" Trinity said.

"Girl, ion' know you be doing them moves when you're so little bro," I shrugged my shoulders at her telling her that it's just a skill and learning mechanism for me.

After they congratulated me, I saw Jey walking up towards me, and I rolled my eyes at him. "Can we talk alone?" I sighed softly, nodding my head as I followed him toward his and Jonathan's locker room, which they shared together.

We both made it to their locker room as he opened the door for me to come in first before him while shutting the door behind him. I sat down on the couch, placing my championship next to me.

It was nothing but silence. I don't think I have the energy to deal with this, especially after tonight's match.

"You wanted to talk so speak up," I retorted while folding my arms.

I knew that he liked my sassy attitude, but I was honestly dead-ass serious about this one, hearing a light, dark chuckle escape his lips.

"You wanna fix that tone of yours, little mama?" He questioned me.

"No, I will not fix my fucking tone nigga. I have every right to have this funky ass attitude with yo' ass playing in my fucking face," I was lashing out at him badly, knowing that what he did really did shatter me and now made me more closed off.

"Like, why me? What did I do so wrong to deserve that? When I saw you as my peacemaker, someone I could go to without feeling guilty..." Jey listened attentively, hearing me lash out at him.

"It was a mistake, Minks. I swear it wasn't supposed to go that far." I shook my head, knowing that he was lying just to get out of it.

"It was a fucking choice not a damn mistake, you know my fucking brother trusted you? And now you have broken that trust for some whore," I vented while wiping the tears away from my cheeks.

I got up from the couch, holding my championship on my shoulder and staring down at him deeply, "Maybe I was a fool to fall in love with you, maybe it was dick that was making me feel this way or something, but I hope you and her both have a wonderful life together I'm gone Josh," before I could head out the door I felt him scooping me up by the thighs causing me to yelp as he took us over to his couch keeping me place on his lap.

His arms snaked around my waist, and I placed my championship next to him, wrapping my arms around his neck for support.

"Don't go please minks, You know I love you," Jey said placing soft kisses on my neck.

"If you loved me, you wouldn't be with Liv Morgan now, would ya?" I tried to resist his wet kisses trailing down my neck because I didn't want to give in; that's how it'll make me look dumb.

"She doesn't mean anything to me like you do," I said, turning away from him, not wanting to listen to anything else he had to say.

He continued to give me wet soft kisses on my neck while placing his hands on my ass cheeks squeezing them both.

I didn't know if this was his way of saying sorry it's definitely working because I am starting to give in to this man as my anger started to go away.

My body didn't operate properly whenever he touched me, Jey gazed up at me seeing me trembling under his touch.

"C'mon you know you love this shit," this was manipulation at this point but he wasn't wrong about that. I managed to push him away while getting up from his lap grabbing my title in the process.

"T-this doesn't feel right at all Josh, after you fucked her now you wanna get into my panties? Nah I'm not doing this with you anymore I'm out," I said as I left his locker room leaving him dumbfounded.

✧˚° OMNISCIENT Yasmine been getting a bunch of miss calls from Jey ever since she left the arena, she was in her hotel room with the blankets over her body watching a movie that's when she heard her door knocking.

She groaned deeply feeling annoyed as she got up from the bed while going towards the door looking through the peephole to see who it was.

It was Trinity standing there along with Bianca she opened the door seeing them look at her. She let them in as she went towards her bed sitting on it.

"Girl, what's is going on with you and Jey?" Trinity questioned her.

'What the fuck did he tell them?'

'Ion' even wanna bring his ass up after what he did,'

"I'm not speaking to him anymore after what he did," She said folding her arms in the process.

They both looked at each other then back at her with a confused expression on their faces. "What do you mean?"

That's when she explained to them that Jey had been fucking around with Liv while showing them the picture that she had gotten from Liv's phone number.

They were shocked to say the least even Trinity knowing that Jey was a loyal man but this was something surprising to her.

"Did you at least hear him out?" Yasmine shook her head.

"No, I refused to listen to him whatsoever because he didn't seem trustful," Yasmine replied as she heard the girls sigh.

Yasmine eyebrows furrowed slightly as she looked at them with a perplexed expression before saying something. "What y'all?"

They both looked at each other and then back at Yasmine.

"We feel like y'all should talk things out—" That's when she lost it.

"IM SORRY? I AM NOT GOING OUT MY WAY JUST FOR HIM TO FUCK ME AND THEN BE WITH THAT WHORE LIV. TALK THINGS OUT TUH." She lashed out at them, running her fingers through her hair, feeling frustrated.

"We understand that, but at least hear him out. Minks for us, please," Bianca begged, seeing Yasmine in disbelief.

She couldn't believe what she was hearing right now, her best friends telling her to listen to a man who fucked another girl and played in her face.

The only way she could listen to what he had to say was if he was going through something or feeling bad about it.

"No, no, I'm not going to do that respectfully. I love you guys, but if you're going to take his side, then all can leave." With that, Yasmine got up from her bed and went towards the bathroom, shutting the door behind her as she slid down on it.

Covering herself in between her legs along with muffled cries and tears coming down her cheeks, she didn't want to speak to him.

She didn't want to deal with him any further, but her heart said something different. She knew that he meant well and didn't want it to happen, but it did.

Yasmine knew that she loved him, that he was her peacemaker, especially when dealing with complicated things like this.

She sat there for a while in the bathroom before hopping in the shower, trying to clear her thoughts.

After taking a shower, she put on some comfy clothes while picking up her phone, debating whether to text him or go see him in his hotel room.

Biting her fingernails she looked at the time, all she could think 'damn he's probably sleep right now,' But she decided to say fuck it and go see him to hear what he has to say.

She put on her slippers and Hoodie while going towards the elevator since his room was on the second floor. Yasmine waited patiently for the elevator to go up to the second floor remembering his room number.

The elevator doors opened as she walked out, heading towards his hotel room. When she approached his room, she knocked on the door, waiting for him to come open it.

Yasmine had her arms folded around her chest as she heard footsteps from behind the door. When the door swung open, he was standing there towering over her 5'2 "figure.

He was shirtless, with his Cuban gold chain around his neck. He was also wearing some sweats and his slides.

"What'chu doing here this late, little mama?" He asked, looking around the hallway.

"I came to see you...I wanna hear what you have to say Josh..." Yasmine said gazing up at the fine Samoan specimen.

He nodded his head while stepping aside for her to come into his room as he shut the door behind them. She sat down on his bed, which smelt like him. His scent put her in a trance.

"You want something to drink, little lady?" She nodded her head as he gave her a cold water bottle.

Once he was settled in, he sat down next to her, admiring her features while he placed his hands on her thigh, rubbing it and letting out a sigh. "Look, what I did was wrong, and I didn't mean for it to happen but she kept pushing me and pushing me until I couldn't anymore without even thinking that it would hurt you minks,"

Yasmine was listening to him attentively, gazing into his brown, pretty eyes.

"I was planning on coming to see you, too, but she came in the way, and I didn't know about the picture she took either. Like I said before, you mean way more to me than her," Jey said, intertwining his hands with her small ones.

"I'm sorry, mama, like for real." She looked into his eyes to see if there was any sincerity behind his words, and there was.

She turned around to face him while sighing deeply, "You know how much that hurt me, Josh? Seeing you in that position with her? It felt like a bullet shot me dead in the heart after seeing that," Yasmine heard her voice crack a little bit.

"You're my peacemaker, and I felt like I lost my person," his eyebrows began to furrow a bit when she said that.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

Yasmine was very hesitant to express her feelings to him because she wasn't sure if he felt the same way as she did, so she just left it alone. She opened her mouth, beginning to say something, but nothing came out, so she closed it while avoiding eye contact with him.

That's when he grabbed her by the chin, placing his soft lips onto hers. This caught her off guard, but she managed to catch on as their lips moved in sync.

Wrapping her arms around his neck as he placed her onto his lap, causing her to grind on him while he gave her ass a smack.

"Fuck, I love you so much, Minks, you don't even know," He confessed as her facial expressions became perplexed.

"Y-you what?" She questioned him.

"You heard me, little girl. I said I love you like you're in love with me, right?" His statement shocked her.

Was this true? That he actually loves her?

"You playing right?" Jey shook his head, gazing up at her.

"No, I'm not. I'm serious, mamas; I'm serious about us," that made her heart flutter as she smiled at him, knowing how he loved it whenever she smiled.

For the rest of the night, they made love, embracing each other's scent.

SOMETHING BOUT' US

A/n: sorrrry for the late update I've been busy at work this past week but I'll be updating again but I hope what Jey is saying is true because ion like it when Yasmine is getting played especially after dealing with Mello ass.

But I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments below.

STAY UCEY.

[tiredandoptimistic]

Fresh off a rewatch of Geothermal Escapism and feeling emotions (this turned into an overlong Troy Barnes analysis post and I'm inviting you on the journey)

The thing that really sticks with me, especially when you consider the rest of season five (and also the show as a whole), is how truly I'm convinced that Troy did need to go on that voyage. He went from a guy who wore his letterman jacket to college and bragged about being prom king, to somebody who was unapologetically himself and content with being judged for it. Despite all this growth, Troy still wasn't his own person; not entirely.

I keep thinking about the bit in Repilot, where Jeff argues that Troy's life was ruined by Greendale because he now revolves entirely around "another man." Putting aside the blatant homophobia, Jeff is kinda right. When asked what he's doing with his life, Troy excitedly talks about what Abed is up to. Now, there's nothing wrong with being supportive and it's clear that Troy feels content with putting Abed's goals first, but it is concerning when you think in context of his arc. In season three, there was the pillow and blanket war as an extension of Troy's frustration with always being the sidekick. Even though they work through a lot of their issues and have an honest discussion about how Abed never saw Troy as lesser, there's still clearly some level of fear that one day he will. We see this in season four, during Inspecticon, when Troy is genuinely afraid that Abed will leave him for someone who (in Troy's mind) is a better match for his intellect. Once again Abed proves that he wouldn't want anybody else, but that's not the end of it. By the start of season five it's great that Troy is comfortable playing support to Abed's goals, but he still hasn't fully resolved the base issues. Yes, he's confident in his worth as a supporter rather than a leader, but he's still never figured out who he is alone.

Looking back at Troy's season one characterization, it's clear that his main struggle as a person is not knowing who he is or what he wants. He defines himself entirely as a quarterback and prom king, even when it's clear that nobody else actually takes that seriously. Even Annie, who knew Troy as the untouchable king of the popular kids and is seriously crushing on him (in a comphet way but that's another post), sees his jock identity as something that's holding him back. In the pilot, Troy has a chat with Jeff about his letterman jacket; expressing how insecure all the jokes make him. It's clear from this that he has no confidence in his own identity. He wears the letterman jacket because he's Troy The Quarterback, doesn't know how to handle that being seen as a bad thing, and goes to Jeff for advice because he needs someone else to tell him what version of himself to become. Whatever choice Troy makes for how to dress, it's about finding the quickest way to balance likeability with the illusion of his own convictions. Like Jeff tells him, "either way, it's for them."

Throughout season one, Troy struggles with his own identity through his friendships with the entire study group, most notably Abed. Despite his meathead persona, Troy's silly side starts to come out in the very second episode, when he and Abed do their iconic Spanish rap during the end card. After that, we see their friendship gradually develop through these short comedic bits. During this time, in "Football, Feminism, and You," we see Troy caught in a conflict between Jeff (who wants him to go back to football) and Annie (who wants him to become more academic). In the end, Jeff and Annie both feel bad for trying to warp Troy to fit thier ideals, and Troy settles on playing football purely because he enjoys the game. After that, Troy and Abed's friendship finally comes out of the end cards and into the show itself. The example I wanna talk about is "Environmental Science," when Troy is once again forced to choose between what he wants to do and how he wants to be seen. At the start of the episode, he embarrases himself in front of his science class by freaking out from fear of Fievel the rat. For the rest of the episode, Troy is unwilling to commit to helping Abed find Fievel by singing their romantic duet because he's already admitted weakness and that highlights his insecurities. He's been getting more comfortable goofing off with Abed, but suddenly he feels all the ways in which his expressions of his actual personality have opened him up to ridicule. Of course the episode ends with Troy joining Abed in their duet to save Fievel, and he even faces his fear of touching the rat to get him back to his cage. From that point onwards, Troy and Abed's friendship is more or less firmly established. I could go into all the ups and downs, but this post is long as hell already and I've still got more to say.

During seasons two and three, Troy almost entirely gives up the tough guy act and accepts that he's a big softie who thinks Abed is the coolest guy in the world for being so unapologetically himself at all times. He's always denied his interests for the sake of appearing likeable and tough, so meeting Abed and seeing that it's possible to be happy and loved a weirdo who never pretends to be anything else is kinda groundbreaking for him. He still has his ups and downs (like when he ditches their matching costumes for the sake of attracting girls in "Epidemiology"), but for the most part he's found a comfortable new role as Abed's Best Friend. Hell, during Shirley's wedding in "Urban Matrimony and the Sandwich Arts," Troy is the one who decides it's not worth trying to be normal when they can be themselves. In "Early 21st Century Romanticism," Troy gives up a date with a girl (something he supposedly really wants) because she won't accept Abed's weirdness. What I'm getting at here is that Troy has given up his high school identity and adopted a new one, but that brings with it some of the same old problems.

By the time season five rolls around, Troy is not an individual. He is one half of a pair: TroyandAbed. This isn't an inherently bad thing; we are a communal species and it's normal and healthy to embrace the fact that you can't function independantly of others. The problem is that he transitioned so smoothly from Prom King Troy to Abed's Best Friend Troy that he never had time in the middle as just Troy. It's wonderful that Abed helped Troy discover one way to express himself and be genuinely happy, but he still only really learned how to do that on Abed's terms. The only thing we see Troy do without Abed is build a blanket fort, which is still fundamentally about Abed. He also dates Britta, but that feels more like Troy trying to prove that he can have an adult relationship and Britta trying to prove that she can stay with a guy who isn't the fucking worst (I love you Britta but your taste in men is rancid). It's clear that both of them are more in love with the idea of a stable relationship than with each other. For their entire relationship Troy is more invested in Abed and Britta is fine with that. He may be sleeping in a separate bedroom, but he's still living in the blanket fort, y'know?

This brings me back to Pierce's will, and his final gift to Troy; a chance to become his own man. Pierce may have the worst opinions on everything, but I still think this opportunity is what Troy needed at that point in his life. He finally gets a chance to explore everything the world has to offer, entirely detached from other people who can warp his opinions. Troy is a mirror, he reflects what's around him. He needs some time on his own to figure out what it is he really wants for himself. Plus, getting to dock in places all over the world gives Troy the chance to be whoever he wants without fear of meeting expectations. He can do anything, try anything; comfortable in the knowledge that he's not impressing anyone. And, at the end, he is able to look back on everything he's experienced and decide once and for all what his happiness looks like. I choose to believe that it's going home to Abed, fully informed of the alternatives and aware that playing support doesn't mean giving up your own identity.

[driftingballoons]

thanks for the tag! :D

color: pink!

food: chocolate

beverage: iced coffee

movie: Spirited Away

tv show: I don’t knowww 😭

book: The Adoration of Jenna Fox - Mary E. Pearson

animal: snakes

singer: Birdy

song (atm): Hero - Faouzia

time of day: As the sun is setting/just after when it’s still light out and the sky’s color is changing :3

song lyrics: Break me with that truth/Take all my fractions/Shaping something new/Out of the fragments

NPT: @opalescent-apples, @fennecwitch, @gaydiation-poisoning, @lordofdragos, @graminos, and anyone else who wants to do it! :3

reblog with your favorite:

color: green

food: cacio e pepe

beverage: chai

movie: pride and prejudice (2005)

tv show: moon knight (2022)

book: the hobbit - jrr tolkein

animal: crows

singer: hozier

song (atm): lost elf theme - trevor morris

time of day: mid-morning bc it's still cool and crisp but sunny generally

song lyric: "honey, you're familiar / like my mirror years ago / idealism sits in prison / chivalry fell on his sword / innocence died screaming / honey, ask me, I should know"

emoji: 🤨

NPT: @fujii-draws, @sincerely-sofie, @mt-travaii, @angel-of-the-moons, @greensagephase, and anyone else! :)

[butterflysonnets]

yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

[heavencasteel420]

It is amazing to me that the show has a character who:

Explicitly says “my father forced me to kill and I was good at it, but I hated it”;

Makes multiple efforts to walk away from a fight where his opponent is doing the absolute most to provoke him and, upon finally snapping, handily beats him;

Stabs a dude with a pair of scissors in self-defense and immediately looks horrified at himself; and

Can stomach all kinds of gross and scary shit unless it involves harm coming to his little brother, whom he obviously has a lot of baggage about protecting.

And a not-insignificant number of people are like “his neurosis is that he feels bad about not being a fighter or a badass.”

[cescalr]

Oooh, definitely glee for the fandom asks! <3

Always with the hornets' nests with these ones, I see! Though i don't think there's a fandom out there that isn't in some way a hornets' nest once it gets large enough... hm. Alright. I'm just gonna be as honest as i can be about this, and tag accordingly.

Glee:

my favourite female character: augh. argh. ouph. so difficult. so hard. Since I'm working off of half-remembered show and half recently-rewatched show... its a tossup. Mercedes, Santana, Quinn. Probably Mercedes. She did nothing wrong ever in her entire life <3 well okay maybe except that one time she smashed kurt's car windows (but it was a banger song, though). Can't say Santana because of the Biphobia TM and other things like excessive use of bigotry-based insults, and Quinn. Oh god girl. Cheating is not cool! Funnily enough! So I find them really interesting but 'favourite' is hard to say. Mercedes. Mercedes for sure <3

my favourite male character: Blaine sam blaine sam blaine sam yes. I am imitating ripping petals off of flowers and coming to a conclusion based on which is the last name i said. So I guess that means Sam! But really this is a tie.

my favourite book/season/etc: Mannnnn idk. I don't like shows for seasons as-a-whole. Also i could not tell you what happened in any given season if you held a gun to my head. I'm not good at that. The only shows i know 'seasons' of are Buffy and Teen Wolf because i've watched them like 100000000000 times (exaggeration) for various reasons (mostly fanfiction research).

my favourite episode (if its a tv show): I can tell you my LEAST favourite episode (blame it on the alcohol, thank you Kurt king of biphobia! this is a persona foible it's not the worst episode in the show. by far. by far. it's kind of an average one. I'm just angry at it.) BUT er. Favourite? Idk. Genuinely some of the earlier Kurt-centric stuff was really well done (his convo with Burt... <3) and the Quinn giving birth accompanied by bohemian rhapsody was obviously iconic, but if I'll be honest I couldn't name any episodes of this show (other than That One previously stated, anyway). And yeah most of the time they were named after song titles and No i don't remember those song titles either. I'm just so bad at this. My memory is that of a goldfish's being haphazardly bounced around on a sieve.

my favourite cast member: it would be really funny if I said Demi Lovato [she counts!] but the truth is N/A: i don't know these people !!! They are strangers!! (i don't. follow celebrities. at all. I couldn't even name most of them. They're just people doing a job and their lives are irrelevant to me beyond their ability to perform that job well. I do not need to know where they live and what coffee they drink. Stalker shit tbh. I'm kind of a very private person myself, so rpf-adjacent stuff just... creeps me out. I've never watched a single cast interview in my lifetime and I'm not about to start!)

my favourite ship: Difficult to say! Grave and obvious lie. Blam. It's blam. Quintana is a close runner up though Santana really needs to stop dating people who cheat on the regular (I'll accept Quinn has grown enough not to do this by the time a Quintana coupling would be viable - and satisfying in terms of character arcs - narratively speaking).

a character I’d die defending: Blaine Anderson did something wrong for sure but like Kurt did it first so shrugs. Cancels out. Bad for each other! Case closed!

a character I just can’t sympathize with: genuinely don't remember if I had one of those the first time around because I was like 10 and just didn't pay attention if I didn't care, but Terri and her racist self take that 'prize' this time, alongside the obvious predator in the room [original choir teacher. Sandy? I forget his name immediately after hearing it. He doesn't deserve to be remembered]. Also JBI is just.... a yikes character all around. I mean, he's a blatant stereotype for one, in a the people who wrote this person don't like jews kind of way. Unfortunately common stereotype too, for the era, so not only is he that, he's also lazy. Just a one-note pervert who's the butt of various antisemitic 'jokes' you've heard from era-peer shows a million times over, tired and awful and a sour reminder of bigotry that continues to this day. Really regrettable character who's lack of redeeming qualities was probably purposeful. (I know Rachel and tina are also jewish, but this comes up very rarely and mostly only when santana needs to say something kind of fucked up, as is her modus operandi, for 'comic relief'. Tina's jewish-ness wasn't even canon for several seasons, because she didn't have a surname or a family or anything resembling complex character depth for several seasons. The one time I really remember Rachel's religion being important was when she was pressuring Kurt into believing in some kind of god, which??? don't do that. Bad example. Trying to guilt trip a friend into faith sucks. I take back what i said earlier Mercedes did that too. Boo. Girls try again that was a bad showing all around. Though i have no idea why Kurt went the acupuncture route as his 'secular' option but i think that has to do a lot with the writers doing literally no research ever once in their lives (you can tell they don't by the way they write the football segments of the show, which make no sense according to football fans who watch Glee, of which there are numerous because real life isn't like fiction where you can only like music or sports. Most of the kids in my school year were doing the most of everything ever if they were the 'popular' ones - we do that differently; popularity isn't really based on who know know; for some bizzare reason literally everyone knew who I was? Even people I'd never spoken to?? - but more about like... how much you can do, I guess. Overachievers, but I'm not saying that negatively; these people were generally - generally - very nice, and surprisingly chill for people who had no spare time whatsoever. I'm not entirely sure when they slept; A* across the board, at least one sport, at least one instrument, several extracurriculars, parties every weekend, dozens of friends and an s.o. . Eh? Way too much going on. Scary lifestyle! Impressive burnout rate, probably. Er. Tangent! Back to the scheduled programming).) There's uhhhh there's a lot of bad characters on the show, but i'd say Sandy and Terri and her equally but more loudly racist sister are truly completely irredeemable ones. Like they're not interesting or anything, they're just there to be narrative annoyances (which, in the case of Sandy specifically, is insane. Arrest that man!!! He has actively sexually assaulted minors!!!).

a character I grew to love: difficult to say because I tend to just make an opinion and stick to it. Also i don't remember who i liked at first and who i didn't, this show came out when i was eight. I didn't watch it until I was a little older than that, of course, but I frankly have spotty memory until my late teens, so! I'm not sure!! Quinn, probably. Pink-hair-era Quinn helped me understand her more, and seeing the moments of kindness hidden behind practical cruelty, when you understand her family and situation, makes things make a lot more sense. It takes a lot to get me to sympathise with a cheater, but I can see where Quinn was getting all turned around in her head about life because of her upbringing and socialisation, not to mention the profoundly negative impact cheerios had on her mentally and that the school's culture in general was not exactly a breeding ground for empathy and optimism.

my anti otp: can you tell (klaine). I don't dislike Kurt!!! Please let him have a fun chillaxed boyfriend in new york with his vogue friends. But also please stop attempting to control other people's diets thank you!! Thank you!! I'm of mixed feelings. Blaine and Kurt both did at least one bad, relationship-ending thing, and proved over and over again that they just weren't on the same wavelength in regards to life goals and ways of living it. They can't even share the same living space, which is kind of required for a functional marriage. I don't know, it just seems like they settled for their first proper, serious boyfriend even if that's not really the best match, and I... wish they'd just got to see more of life first, you know? They got married at like 20! Or something! I'm 23, I cannot imagine getting married at 20. That's a baby. Let them live first!

(same for Santana and Brittney, imo. I also don't really like them together because Santana and Brittney have very different ideas regarding monogamy, which is just never going to go down well in the long run. If your girl cheats on you like twenty times and tells you to your face its not cheating in her view of things, but you think it is, break up with her because you'll just make each other miserable. Brittney sort of seems incapable of feeling guilt but if she were, this kind of moral pressure would be Not Good, and obviously Santana isn't comfortable with the idea and doesn't have to be!! Just move on!!! Find other people!!!! Don't marry your first girlfriend if you've broken up like ten times this is simple!!!! Please!!!! But Klaine wins out over Brittana because - in my opinion, glee fandom please do not persecute me, I am known for this specific thing - I see... interactions that verge on abusive between Klaine that I don't see in Brittana. So. Oof? Ex; use of public perception to disguise attack; deliberately hurting Blaine in a stage-combat fencing match (you are not meant to make actual contact in these) and thus using Blaine's own dislike of making his difficulties common knowledge against him in order to 'punish' him. This is no good! Don't do this!!.[Also just to err vaguepost about a comment.... that is. not. what i would call passive aggressive. Physically attacking someone with a sword - no matter the type of sword, fencing foils hurt just as much, they're just not stab-you sharp... er, these days - is just straight-up aggressive.]).

Note that negative things stick in the mind better than positive ones; on a rewatch I may well alter my opinion!

But also I'm really, really stubborn. So it's not likely. Klaine.

[pianapplez]

Hello there 👋👀,

So I just found your blog and had a lot of fun scrolling through all the pjo show crit😂 I couldn't help but notice that one tag you left on a post where you said you had some beef with Annabeth's portrayal in the books 👀 Would you mind elaborating on that if you're comfortable with it🙈? Because I absolutely share that sentiment, but it's sooo veeeery rare that I see other people express anything like it... I've found that trying to be a part of the fandom can be pretty alienating most of the time, if you're not exactly the biggest most devoted Percabeth shipper...😅 And often any criticism leveled at Annabeth just gets you a smack with the "internalized-misogyny" hammer... it's even worse in the tv show now due to... obvious reasons...

Again just if you're comfortable with answering of course🙈 There is a reason I stayed on anon after all...😅😂

Really glad you asked because i finally get to ramble about this heheheh (going forward, know that i skimmed over The Last Olympian to have a clearer sense of what I meant because that's the book where Rick fumbles her character more than the others)

i'm gonna try to make as much sense as possible but short answer would be, she's underdeveloped. Long answer:

She really got on my nerves in the last two books, with the whole Rachel debacle and then the Battle of New York. I can't really remember a single moment in those books where she and Percy aren't bickering or having heated discussions, which really made me question their friendship status. Of course, it's not like friends can't fight and it obviously builds up the (romantic) tension between them, but it got unbearable at one point.

I understand she's a teenager in an incredibly stressful situation that didn't even get to have a normal upbringing- she grew up way too fast (run away at 7, head counselor at 12) while also not really maturing, which is not a problem for a character, if it is handled properly. Given the fact that I am writing this, Riordan did not.

On the surface, my biggest beef is that Annabeth is not exactly held accountable for her actions (ie. treating Rachel a bit like shit and going off on Percy for a bunch of stuff.) I know Percy is to blame a bit here: as far as we know, in TLO he basically cuts the greek world out of his life as much as he can as a coping mechanism. And while yes, he never apologizes either, he doesn't give her nearly half the hard time she gives him: always either giving him the cold shoulder (there must be at least one example of this in the entire series but i cant be bothered to look it up sorry) or starting an argument only to then storm off (see the "you're a coward, Percy Jackson!" scene, which is not the fairest example since she was confronting Percy about ignoring camp but also was a bit too harsh about it) (especially after finally reading the prophecy and being under the impression that he was absolutely going to die when he turned 16 lmao) or just straight up storming off (see, Annabeth reacting when Rachel shows up for the first time during the battle of new york). While most of these feel, at least to some degree, fairly justified given how the entire situation does an absolute number on her emotions, she comes off a bit brattish and like she's trying to rile Percy up, especially when it comes to Rachel, which in the context of a battle that could mean the destruction of the world.... Well, it reads as a bit childish to me, and i wouldn't exactly have that much of a problem with it if it was dealt with in some way (a two-way apology would be nice).

After that first impression, i realized that Annabeth is barely ever anything else other than a plot device (when relating to Luke) or a love interest (when relating to Percy). This might be because the books are on Percy's POV. Hell, on the third book he's even conflicted when Annabeth is considering joining the Hunters of Artemis, aka, when making a choice for herself would mean he loses her (which is fine and dandy but it feels like Percy is more upset about her choosing her own path rather than being sad about not seeing her as often); we really only get a few glimpses of her, as in, actually her when she's on her own.

Obviously it's impossible to talk about Annabeth without touching on percabeth, which also is, in my opinion, what hinders Annabeth's character the most. On paper they sound great. The guy whose fatal flaw is loyalty falls in love with a girl whose been let down by people over and over, and she decides to never give up on the boy whose always had people give up on him (can't find one of the million posts that talks about this right now but it always goes something like that) And yeah, the bickering is really well written! But that's literally as far as it ever goes: they don't ever seem to have fun together, because 8 times out of 10 the bickering ends up being passive aggressive, and mostly done by Annabeth. My biggest gripe about percabeth is that their friendship seems to be based off... shared trauma. Literally. Other than going on quests together we are given no examples of them hanging out, nor a reason why they would want to spend time together in the first place, not even a shared hobby. Yes, in the fourth book they had a movie "date" planned but of course they didn't even get to it, and surprise surprise, they had a minor discussion, and surprise surprise, Annabeth was passive aggressive again. It's hard to picture them having fun together when even the author doesn't write in any scenes in which they get along smoothly (and before you say anything, a scene in which they get along where neither of them is about to die, and they're not talking about previous adventures. Gets a bit hard then, doesn't it?) It's even harder to picture them as a couple when the moment she gets upset about something, she starts coming off as emotionally manipulative (see, again, literally any conversation with Rachel or about Rachel)

To be fair, the books are relatively short and don't allow many "filler" chapters, if you will; there's always something happening to keep the main plot or a minor plot point moving forward, but it's not like there is no room to develop the characters' relationships, especially when we're talking about the main char and what is essentially his endgame. As an example we have Percy and Clarisse, or Percy and Beckendorf. Their interactions are brief but still hold so much weight.

Worst of all, Annabeth could be one hell of a character; what's most interesting of all is how being a daughter of Athena she is still incredibly emotionally driven, which is displayed very clearly with her fatal flaw being pride: her telling the Sphynx that her questions were too easy was not smart nor strategic: it was completely impulsive. I seriously think she wasn't far from being the best character in the series had she been given more time.

I guess i have as much beef with Annabeth as i have with Rick for doing her dirty. I really could sum this up with: while her emotions are justified, she acts upon them quite poorly. And this is what i mean when i say she's underdeveloped, because it would've been nice to see her come to her senses a bit.

Would love to read anyone's opinions on her character though, feel free to comment, even (or especially) if you don't agree with me!

[creative-hanyou-girl]

I don't know if anyone else feels this way but I think a big reason why I'm so chill about the changes made to the PJO show from the books is because I kind of look at each other as their own seperate canon.

Like, I read a lot of anime and manga, and anime adaptations have a huge habit for changing plot points for various reasons, and as a fan of said anime and manga, I've found that I can enjoy both versions of the same story even with the differences when I look at them as their own universe or canon. That's not to say I don't want them to be faithful or true to the source material, but if a scene or situation plays out differently for a logical or entertaining reason, than I can still appreciate that deviation from the manga even if I still like the other original version of that part more. And I can even like the reversal way if I feel an anime does something better than even the manga. But if I want to, I can look at certain moments as more canon than others because I got 2 different versions of that same scene or moment.

And, I don't know, I kind of apply that reasoning to the PJO series as well, mainly with the books, the show, and even the musical (not the movies put that right back where it came from). So far I'm loving the TV show, and while I miss some of the things they changed (like the pink poodle), this adaptation really is doing a great job with staying true to the heart and spirit of the original book that I personally am not even really bothered by the changes, especially when I remember that the books will always still be there with it's own version, or canon, of events.

Like, I will say 1 thing I adore in the books that isn't really in the show is the fact that a lot of Percy and Annabeth's "rivalry" during TLT has more to do with the rivalry between Poseidon and Athena. I just really like on how this adds a level of "forbidden friendship/love" to their relationship 'cause I personally eat the forbidden relationship trope up, especially when it's done well like with Percabeth.

Yet, even if this isn't really the reason percabeth have beef with each other in the show, I can still appreciate and enjoy that according to the show's canon, they have issues because they genuinely have problems with each other as actual people rather than their parents' rivalry, because at the end of the day, that's the PJO TV show canon, and I can always turn to the books for that version of Percabeth's "rivalry", as that is the PJO book canon.

Same goes for the characters too. I will always have and love my dark haired Percy and blond haired Annabeth in the books, but I can also welcome and love Walker's Percy and Leah's Annabeth from the show. And so far, they along with Aryan are KILLING IT as those characters.

I can love both versions of the characters.

I can love both versions of the same story.

I can look at both versions as they own seperate canon or mix them together if I so wish too (especially since both versions of PJO are written by the same guy)

And that's ok. The adaptation doesn't have to be a complete copy of the books. It doesn't have to have things play out eactly the same way. The characters don't have to look exactly the way they are described as in the books. And that's ok. I will still always have the books to love and appreciate, but I can also start to love and appreciate the new adaptation for it's new spin and twists to the same story that sets it apart as it's own canon while still staying true to the spirit of its predecessor.

Anyway, sorry if I'm not making a lot of sense. I just think the people complaining about the changes in the show are looking at it all the wrong way. The show has it's own canon just as the books have their own canon, or even the musical. At the end of the day, isn't that kind of cool to have different versions of the same story and characters? Doesn't it give you so many more options to look at the story in different ways that you can prefer or choose from? Doesn't it give you new versions of canon that you choose from? And really, as long as the PJO adaptation, or any adaptation for that matter, stays true to the heart and spirit of the original story and characters, do the changes made really matter?

[isolophilian]

me @ Disney: make Smelly Gabe a sculpture or Mickey fucking gets it

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

gratitude list time I'll go first

[thats-my-passion-right-there]

I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god