#Actually fuck you newt you made me cry

[wildbwills]

Maze runner actually cured me, for the longest time I only drew girls and now I actually can draw guys…thanks Newt I guess

[moonlitkilljoy]

👋🏻🤠 it’s the Pacific Rim anon back again! You are so right for getting me to watch it.

First off, the soundtrack blew my dick off. I never knew I wanted to see a big robot punch a big lizard with some heavy metal shred in the background.

I also adore the connection of the kaiju coming from the pacific. As someone who lives on the ring of fire, there’s the constant danger of fault lines buckling, tsunamis, volcanoes, etc so the fact that the destructive mega titans are coming from the pacific completely tracks lmao. And the fact that humanity’s poisoning of the planets ecosystems makes it more viable for terraforming?? It scratched the marine bio itch in my brain.

Oh yeah and the entire central plot of letting people into your brain and having them see your entire being in moments and choosing to trust and work with this person. The mortifying ordeal of being perceived but you run a huge robot with that. That you can share these bonds with people no matter how many times in the past you’ve been through suffering, you can always let people back in and it will hurt but in the end it’s what keeps you going. Maybe I cried 4 separate times watching it, what about it????

Newt and Hermann. My god. Right and left brain math and biology brain and heart. Insert picture of that Chihuahua dog crying and biting the pillow. 

Anyway, I loved it! Tumblr is always supplying banger media to consume. Now to find a copy of Goncharov!

HI!!! IT'S LOVELY TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN!! I'M GLAD YOU LIKED IT!!! I actually saw that I got this ask while I was in the midst of rewatching Pacific Rim flgjdkflg

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY CORRECT, THE SOUNDTRACK IS SO GOOD!!! Plus, I completely failed to think about the ring of fire!!!! that's such a good point!! AND THE WHOLE CONNECTION TO GLOBAL WARMING?? FUCK, DUDE, IT'S SO GOOD. AND!! I totally get the marine bio thing!!! this movie is VERY good at scratching my biology brain in the perfect way (not to mention my math brain, but thats just a whole nother thing. i, a guy who likes numbers, see a guy who likes numbers and lose my fucking mind immediately).

YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT THE CENTRAL PLOT. PACIFIC RIM IS A MOVIE ABOUT SAVING THE WORLD WITH ROBOTS POWERED BY LOVE AND THE POWER OF HUMAN CONNECTION AND VULNERABILITY. I honestly couldn't have phrased it better myself though, "That you can share these bonds with people no matter how many times in the past you’ve been through suffering, you can always let people back in and it will hurt but in the end it’s what keeps you going." is incredibly poetic and sums up EXACTLY what makes the movie great. I cried so so fucking much as well, you're so valid.

NEWT AND HERMANN. I love these gay scientists so fucking much. I'm an expert, you can trust me on this. The fucking fact that them not being drift compatible wasn't even a possibility to think about makes me lose my fucking mind (evidently, seeing as I made a post about that exact thing fdgjlkdfj). I love their dynamic so much and I love them with my entire heart. Here's a screenshot, just for you, of a wip screenshot redraw of them that I've been working on :-)

(mario creatures are there because my girlfriend and I were playing super paper mario when I started sketching this ^^; oops)

I am delighted to have supplied you with some great media!!!! Feel free to dm me or send some more asks if you ever wanna chat more about it >:] or even if you have any art requests, or smth or other :D i'd prolly also be able to recommend you some pacrim fics, if thats your thing— i've accumulated quite a few in the last two/three weeks or so

And, again, i'm SO glad you liked it ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

LET ME KNOW IF YOU FIND THAT COPY, PLEASE AND THANK YOU <3

[imagymnasia]

personal yelling below the cut, feel free to keep scrolling. I just need to be sappy and hopeful for like two seconds before The Despair tries to take me again.

So first, some context I guess.

I've always loved books; always been a storyteller. And when I realized that writing was something anyone could do, the entire world opened up. (Shout out to my 2nd grade teacher, Mrs. Nutzman. I owe you my life.) And for a long while I wrote for the joy of it, you know? Just because I could. Just because I had stories that needed to be told. Sometimes the story was profound or about processing deep emotion, and sometimes it was making a self-insert OC and kissing your childhood cartoon crush.

You know. Like you do.

And then I graduated and went to college and learned about the world and (for a multitude of reasons that would take me a book to explain fully) I gave up. I lost it. My muse, my motivation, my spark, whatever you want to call it. It was just gone. I stopped writing, I hit the wall, and all that shiny-eyed wonder and joy and purpose simply vanished.

Years pass. I try again, sometimes, but it never sticks. I can't recapture what I had, but neither can I make it anew. I try again. I fail. I try agan, but with less optimism. I fail.

I stop trying.

Fast forward to the pandemic, and discovering a fandom that inspired me so much I started writing fanfic again. I hadn't written fanfic in 20+ years. Hell, I'd barely written ANYTHING since the early 2000s. And it feels good! I'm on a roll. I join zines, I slap stuff on AO3, I trade headcanons with my buddies. It was great! But it wasn't enough. People leave. Fandom fizzles. ButI keep trying.

And I burn out. Again. And I quit. AGAIN.

Then FFXIV took hold of me and I give it one last shot. Just a little; just a TASTE. It's not even writing, I tell myself, as I give my character backstory and watch as she slays gods and falls in love. It's just for me and like one other person, anyway. (Hi, Haj! You are the Newt to my Herman, the Sain to my Kent, and I forever adore you.)

And it's fine. At this point in my story, I'd given up on Writing, but I could play in my little sandbox. Whatever dregs of happiness I could find in my pretend world were enough. Honestly, I was just happy to be imagining again.

And THEN I found more XIV fans, and god help me but they cared? About my character? About her story? About ME? And the fans became friends. And then we started writing together. And then we made a small writing group together. And somehow in the two decades since I decided I was going to Be a Writer I was actually for-real writing again.

So here we are at present day and we're trading fics and talking about poetry and doing writing challenges and sharing prompts and building resources and ??????

[The writer pauses here because she is once again overcome with emotion because the profundity of what is happening hits her all over again.]

...

You know, I was trying to be witty and articulate about this but I just gotta say it: I'm so happy.

I'm so fucking happy it hurts, because this is all I've ever wanted. All I have ever truly wanted was to find a group of friends who love this as much as I do. Who want to write, who want to create, who care what other folks are doing and working on and creating, who cheer for each other and lift up the things we make and say This is Good. This Matters.

Not all of us want to be capital-w Writers (in fact I may be the only one? One of two? I don't know and I haven't asked and that's on me) but the fact that we all came together because this thing that brings me, personally, so much joy ALSO does that for the rest of us? It gives me hope. It is inspiring and beautiful and I am not at all exaggerating when I say that sometimes I am so overwhelmed with emotion just because our little writing corner exists that it brings me to tears.

I'm crying right now.

Community matters. Art matters. And for the first time in my life those two things have finally intersected in this wonderful awkward beautiful messy imperfect incredible space, with people I care about and trust with my whole heart, and I am so

fucking

happy

that I truly do not have the proper words to convey what it means to me.

I feel like I've found a little piece of myself again, a piece I have long neglected and ignored and told it didn't matter---all because it only ever mattered to me, and that just wasn't enough. Dreams long since dead are rising up again; for they were never dead actually, they were just sleeping and now that season is over and it's time to grow again.

So while I'm processing a lot of Big Dark Scary Things right now, I am also thinking of the Good, and holding to hope and defiance and beauty in the face of all that. And I'm going to keep creating, because to do otherwise would be to turn my back on the things that make me, me; to give up is to let Big Dark Scary win, and I refuse to let it take these things from me again.

I don't really know how to end this so I guess I'll just say it's really nice to have direction again, and to have people to share it with. I don't talk about this stuff irl and there are a myriad reasons why that I won't get into.

So. I guess if you're in the group and you've read this then thank you.

It feels weird to thank people for this but I'm truly grateful to each and every one of you. Thanks for being a bright spot in a dark world and giving me a place to actually, fearlessly, be my fucking self. It may seem like a small inconsequential thing but I promise you, it's not.

That's all.

I'm going to go have another cry and eat snacks, now.... and then? Then I will write.

Ioj out.

[finsterhund]

They have me on hydromorphone.

It feels better than when I don't take it.

Other than that, overrated tbh.

I actually took photos of the Sly I made, when I was still in the hospital but it's too much effort to transfer them over onto my computer to upload them so that will have to wait. I also want to take photo comparing my current drains to my sternum scar from my trauma because technology has advanced quite a lot.

The drains are still the fucking worst aspect of it though. awful wretched things.

My sternum also hurts. But we apparently did not go through the sternum so maybe it's phantom pain due to trauma? Who the fuck knows.

Apparently I felt the need to "save" the bandage I came home with from my IV. And I didn't know the fuck why. Well I figured it out just now. I kept every one that Cazza was sent home with. Their little colorful wraps mostly. Not the gauze. I guess I did it on instinct. In spite of how fucked up I am right now I'm still subconsciously thinking of her and missing her. :( she would have taken so much good care of me through this. Still, Scott has been a sweetheart although roommate doesn't walk him as regularly so I have to hear him whining and crying until he gets the hint. But there's no way I could control him out there like this lol. He is quite the puller.

I guess I'll throw out the little IV tape when I'm feeling up to it. For now it's too sentimental. Missing Cazza. Wish she could have been here for this, seen me better than I've been is so so long. Seen what I would be capable of when I recovered. You know? We only really knew each other sick.

Did you know leaving anesthesia can trigger depression? I sure fucking do. Wow.

Honestly anyone looking for the best way to support me can draw Andy as a rough skin newt, send me money (lmfao yeah I know) and send me messages. I'm definitely not up to really replying to anything in a timely matter, but I like being known and wanted and thought about.

[tubadorashifts]

Things i’m excited for in ⠀⠀⠀my Marauders DR!

˗ˏˋ THE CLASSES ´ˎ˗

I’ve been a massive fan of harry potter since I was a kid and my favourite parts of the books and the movies are when we get to see them doing normal schoolwork. As soon as I shift there i’m literally going to spend all day reading my school books to learn more about the wizarding world. I just know Sirius and James will be sick of me because you’ll never not find me in the library. This’ll probably be the only reality where i’m actually excited to study and do homework lmao

˗ˏˋ THE MAGICAL CREATURES ´ˎ˗

HAVE U SEEN ALL OF THE CUTE CREATURES IN FANTASTIC BEASTS??? I’M SO EXCITED TO SEE THEM ALL. I’m going to be besties with Hagrid I just know it. Even better my dad in this dr is Newt Scamander, so i’ll have grown up around magical creatures. I’m just going to end up being a mini version of my dad tbh. I can’t wait to meet Pickett he’s so adorable i’m going to give him so much smooches.

˗ˏˋ MY FAMILY ´ˎ˗

So I said this in the last section but my dad is Newt Scamander and my mum is Tina Goldstein!!! I’m not even kidding, I think this is one of the only realities where I actually scripted parents but you can’t tell me that they wouldn’t be such great parents? I can imagine that instead of reading me bedtime stories, they would tell me stories of all of their adventures together. ALSO I can’t forget about Queenie and Jacob, I can’t wait to meet them too! I can’t wait to go out shopping with Queenie or have Jacob teach me how to bake. I’ve also scripted that Newt is the Care of Magical Creatures teacher and his brother Theseus is the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, so i’ll be seeing both of them around a lot teehee

˗ˏˋ MY FIRST DAY ´ˎ˗

The first time I shift to my marauders dr, i’ll have arrived the day before the rest of the students because my dad is a teacher, so this will give me time to explore the school by myself so I can try to figure out where i’m going lmao. This is also because I want to practice some magic and underage wizards can only do this at Hogwarts i’m pretty sure? I’m honestly just nervous that I won’t remember any spells 😭 I’ve scripted that I have been writing diaries since I was little and they also have little pictures in them that I took and I can’t wait to read them and see what my childhood was like (I know i’ll have memories of my childhood but I also figured this was a good idea!)

˗ˏˋ MY SPECIAL ABILITIES ´ˎ˗

You best believe i’ve made myself one of the most op wizards in the wizarding world because why wouldn’t I? In this dr, I am part veela, part siren, metamorphmagus and an animagus 💀 One of the first things i’m going to end up doing is fucking around with my appearance and seeing what I can do. ALSO I’VE SEEN LITERALLY NO ONE TALK ABOUT WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE AN ANIMAGUS??? LIKE YOU’RE TURNING INTO AN ANIMAL ITS GOTTA BE REALLY STRANGE. I’m adopted in this dr so that’s why i’m part veela and siren. The reason why I scripted this is because I have a serious case of ‘I have to be the main character’ and being part veela basically means i’m going to look hot no matter what, so obviously i’m scripting that. For the siren part, i’m just living my 9 year old dreams of being a mermaid ngl

˗ˏˋ HOGWARTS ´ˎ˗

I’m so gonna end up crying the first time I see the outside of Hogwarts, i’m not kidding. Every time I see a picture of Hogwarts, I get so emotional, it’s seriously so prettysjakkslsakka. I also keep forgetting the forbidden forest is forbidden even though it’s in the name lmao? No one can stop me from exploring the forbidden forest, not even death. You’ll have to drag me out by my ankles or in a body bag. ALSO, I have to go to the astronomy tower so badly, i’m freaking out, like you know when Harry was like “I never realised how beautiful Hogwarts was” in the 6th movie or something? I was so confused. You’ve spent like 6 years here and not once have you noticed how beautiful it is???

˗ˏˋ MY FRIENDS ´ˎ˗

I’M SO EXCITED TO MEET MY FRIENDS ANSJJKAKAKHHSJKKS. So i’ve known James since we were kids because we grew up right next to each other and I used to stay with his family when my parents went on dangerous missions or whatever when I was younger so we’re very close. And then once I start Hogwarts, i’ll meet the rest of the marauders as well as Lily, Marlene and Mary. My friends are one of the main reasons why i’m shifting to this dr. I’ve always wanted an extremely close friend group where we could tell each other anything or do anything together. They’re going to end up hating me, i’m going to be so clingy once I shift there i’m never going to stop hugging them. I’m so excited to get ready for balls together with the girls and have sleepovers with them or do pranks and play quidditch with the marauders

˗ˏˋ QUIDDITCH ´ˎ˗

I’m obsessed with quidditch and it’s not even real 😔 (the flying kind I mean). Like it’s to the point where I might rival James or Oliver Wood with my obsession, it’s really bad. I listen to the Harry Potter audiobooks on my way to work and whenever they start playing quidditch I get so hyped. Like my hearts beating super fast and I get sweaty, it’s ridiculous. I act like I don’t know what’s going to happen 💀. Anyway, I’m going to be the seeker for the Gryffindor team and I’M SO EXCITED. The first couple of times James wakes me up for quidditch practice i’ll be excited until it’s lashing rain and then i’ll end up hating him forever. I might end up being either a professional quidditch player or a magizoologist in the future. But i’m going to be the coolest quidditch player in Hogwarts, trust me 😎

Thank you for reading this post!! It’s kinda long and I don’t even know if it’s interesting or if I just rambled the entire time but whatever lol

[luveline]

in the morning, afternoon and night [Fred Weasley x Reader]

tags: reader-insert, hurt/comfort, self esteem issues, low self esteem, reader has acne, sad reader, insecure reader

pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

word count: 1.8k

You glared at your reflection.

You'd think with such amazing magical medicine available, some witch or wizard would've invented a cure for acne, or at least a spell that covered it up.

You'd struggled with it since your third year. The muggle doctor you'd seen with your mother had suggested it was hormonal, and would calm down as you got older.

That was years ago.

It shouldn't have been a big deal. It wasn't, really. It wasn't usually very painful, though it was itchy as a stinging nettle and twice as unsightly. A large part of you knew it wasn't your fault, that acne was something that simply affected people at different times in their lives. You'd tried topicals and changing your diet, you'd tried losing weight and exercising and dermaplaning and everything they suggested in your mams fashion magazines.

Nothing worked.

Tears welled in your eyes and you sniffed them back, blinking rapidly.

It might've been silly, but it honestly made you want to hide away. You'd skipped dinner without really thinking, finding your way into the girls bathroom you inhabited now. You straightened your tie and robes, dusting down the sides. You leaned forward again, dabbing under your eyes with your sleeve.

The last thing you wanted was for anyone to know you'd been crying, because then someone might ask why. You didn't want to talk about it, ever.

If Fred saw you like this...

You and Fred Weasley had been almost dating for a few weeks now. Almost, because you hadn't talked about the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing yet.

It had been years of thinking he was the fittest boy in Gryffindor (besides George) and months of meeting his gaze in the corridors and catching his eye over dinner. Gradually it had become something more; he started carrying your books between classes and opening doors, touching your arms and your hair and your face.

You cringed at the memory. He had been so caring, moving to wipe an eyelash from the skin under your eye. You'd violently flinched from his hand, afraid he might feel the bumpy texture of your skin, feel the acne beneath your makeup. He'd been apologetic and a little confused, filling you with guilt. You hadn't been able to find a way to tell him it wasn't him, it was you. Of course you wanted him to touch you, the thought of him cradling your face had been the subject of many dizzy daydreams, but you just couldn't tell him this one thing.

It was your deepest insecurity.

The stress had only made it worse. Redness was easy to cover with muggle make up and even some wizarding tricks you'd learned over the years, but there wasn't a way to smooth your skin, and the acne was textured.

It was depressing. You didn't want to use that word, it felt ungrateful to compare your skin issues to something so severe, but it made you miserable.

You but down on your quivering lip, pushing away from the mirror unhappily and opening the bathroom door, a frown on your face.

"Y/N!" a familiar voice said.

You jumped, startled but unsurprised. Fred had a talent of always knowing where you were. You'd find it creepy if he wasn't so endearing.

"Fred," you said, plastering a smile over your frown. "I was just coming to find you."

"What a coincidence, ma chérie, I was doing the same."

"Well," you began, easily sidling into his space, "you found me."

"Yes, I did," Fred hummed, wrapping his arms behind your neck, grinning.

He took a long look at your face, his forehead creased. "What's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong, Fred."

He moved his hands to your shoulders, looking down into your face searchingly. "Have you been crying?" he asked.

You shook your head, lying without thinking. "Something in my eye,"

"Both of them?"

You stepped backwards. He let go of your shoulders accordingly.

"Y/N?"

"It's really nothing," you said through a forced laugh.

He frowned at you for a few seconds more and his face cleared. "Alright," he said slowly, rolling the words in his mouth, "if you say so, doll."

You opened like a blooming flower at the pet name, your whole face softening. You smiled, hoping he understood that the smile meant, oh I just so adore you, Fred Weasley.

He threaded his fingers through yours, dragging you down the corridor beside him and waxing poetic about their newest lot of Peruvian darkness powder as you went.

-

It got so bad you couldn't go to class.

Okay, so you definitely could've gone to class, but the thought of leaving your curtained bed was enough to make you sick with anxiety, so worried that everyone would see you - see your face.

NEWTs were coming fast and hard. Everyone who wanted to be anyone was working hard studying their asses of, on top of Professor Umbridge's million new rules you had to abide by, including her newest life-ruining rule: Boys and girl are not to be within 5 inches of each other.

What a joke. You struggled through classes, wrote essays so long your hand burned at night and now you weren't allowed to sit next to your almost boyfriend at lunch? It was miserable. It was making you miserable, and now you may as well have sharpied on your forehead how equipped your body was to deal with it.

Fucking badly.

You groaned to yourself, rolling on your side to face the wall. You were at your wits end. It felt endlessly unfair that the thing that was stressing you out most was getting worse from stress.

Your stomach growled hungrily.

You threw your arm over your eyes in defeat, eyes finally filling with tears. You felt so hopeless. There was nothing to be done except keep up your routine until the flare up was over, or until your mothers next 'miracle cure' popped into existence.

The tears felt too hot against your sore skin. You couldn't help but sob quietly to yourself in self-pity.

A knock sounded at the door. You gasped, wiping the tears away in panic.

"Y/N?" It was Alicia. "Are you alright? Can I come in?"

"Yes," you managed. "Yes, of course. It's your room too, after all."

The door clicked open. Alicia appeared, tanned skin completely clear and glowing, though each perfect feature was marred with empathy. "Fred's been begging every girl in the common room to come fetch you, but I told him to leave you be."

"Thank you," you said.

You cleared your throat. Alicia moved her weight from foot to foot, twisting her hands.

"I- Y/N. I won't pretend to know how it feels, but I promise you, Fred won't care. He's beside himself worrying that you're bedridden and dying or-" she laughed to herself, "or that you're still mad at him for the itching powder. What I mean is... he's a good guy, and you're upset. Maybe you should tell him what's wrong. He won't care."

You sniffed. "I know," you admitted, feeling the weight of her shifting the bed. "I know he's a great guy. I just wouldn't blame him if he, if he didn't like me anymore. If he found it ugly. I would understand it, and I think that makes it worse," you choked on your words, heat building behind your eyes.

"Oh, Y/N," Alicia said, placing a tentative but comforting hand on your shoulder.

You lay in quiet, listening to your own ragged breathing.

"I'll go talk to him," Alicia said.

"No! I mean, no. Thank you, but no. I... I'll speak to him myself."

Alicia nodded, rubbing your arm kindly.

The sound of the door clicking shut behind her finally spurred you into sitting up. You dressed in a hurry, chucking a wool jumper over last nights pyjamas.

He wouldn't care, would he? You cringed. Yes, he definitely would. Whatever was between you would stop. He'd have the grace to let you down slowly, drawing away his affections. He was a polite guy, he'd probably even say the whole spiel of "it's not you, it's me". But he would, eventually.

Well, you figured. Let it be quick. Like ripping off a bandaid.

You tread lightly down the steps, hoping to see him before he saw you.

Of course, when the slightest groan on the bottom step sounded, his lovely face whipped to meet yours. He smiled in relief, but it was mixed with something else. Disgust, your brain supplied nastily. He was disgusted. He rose to his feet, smiling smiling smiling. But something in his eyes was different, now.

"Y/N," he said.

"Hi," you said.

"Hi yourself, beautiful. Where've you been all day?"

"I'm... sick. Bad cold," you settled on.

He raised an eyebrow. "You sound okay," he said, not unkindly.

"I..." you looked down at your hands.

A siren was sounding in your head. You didn't think Fred had seen you without make up for the last 3 years. Fight or flight was leaning heavily towards flight.

"Well, are you hungry?"

You shook your head.

"Are you sure? You haven't eaten all day. You need something in your system if you're gonna fight this cold."

"I'm not actually sick, Fred," you admitted under your breath.

"I know."

You looked up. He was still smiling kindly. It was infuriating.

"Look," you said finally, rushed and all at once, "if you don't want to- if you're grossed out. Then it's fine, I'll understand if you don't want to see me anymore."

Fred was stricken.

"I know it's - ugly."

"Ugly? Nothing about you is ugly."

"Fred, my face-"

"No, listen to me, Y/N. It's not ugly. It's not gross. You're not any of those things, are you kidding?" he said, grabbing your hands. "You're beautiful. All the time, in the morning, afternoon and night. You're beautiful in charms and transfiguration and care of magical creatures. You were beautiful yesterday and you're beautiful today and you'll be even more so tomorrow." He stopped suddenly, looking down at your joined hands. His cheeks had turned bright red.

"Smooth, Freddie," came George's voice, from the sofa behind them.

"Shove OFF," exclaimed Fred, growing more red by the second. Heat filled your own cheeks.

"It's skin, Y/N. That's all it is."

"Okay," you said tightly, trying not to cry.

Fred breathed out, his hair shifting in response. His corded arms pulled you tight to his chest. You breathed him in. He smelled sweet and rough, like burning caramel.

He thought you were beautiful.

You smiled into his shirt.

<3<3<3

tag list: @msmimimerton

if you’d like to be added to a tag list, please ask ! for in general or for specific characters, i don’t mind

[dreaming-of-the-end]

Even Stars Can Fall: Sasha x Anne x Marcy

Comments are better than General Yunan, Scourge of the Sand Wars, Defeater of Ragnar the Wretched, and the youngest newt to ever achieve the rank of general in the great Newtopian Army! 

A/N: The fandom I thought I'd never write for... Well, here we are I suppose. This contains spoilers for season 3, so if you haven't seen Olivia and Yunan yet (or finished season 2, actually) beware!!

TW: slight blood/wounds, ask if there should be more!

Summary: And then Sasha is wrapping her arms around them, and maybe this is the puzzle piece falling into place. Maybe this is the feeling when everything that's empty in you becomes whole.

Taglist: @raedas @venecs (idk who else is into amphibia, but feel free to tell me if you are :))

She's crying.

She's crying, and she can't stop.

Because Marcy is herself again, even if she is slumped in Sasha's arms like a fallen star.

Her breaths are normal again, not raspy like they've been, and they move in a rhythm that Anne has memorized from all the times she'd lie awake at sleepovers, just listening. She knows the harmony of Sasha's snores with Marcy's quiet purrs, knows how their breaths fit together like the pieces in a puzzle.

A puzzle that has had a piece missing for too long.

"Marcy," Anne whispers, tears dripping down her face as she gently shakes her friend's shoulders. Part of her needs to hear her voice again, see her eyes open and know that the Core is gone. "Mar-Mar, wake up."

"She always slept too late, didn't she?" Sasha is crying too, but she's trying to hide it. She uses her free hand to swipe at her eyes, coughing to hide her weak voice. There's a cut on her cheek dripping with blood, but she doesn't seem to notice. "Never wanted to wake up in the morning."

Anne reaches over to wipe at the cut with the only part of her sleeve not covered with dust from the rubble around them, and Sasha winces before she smiles sadly at her. "Thanks."

Their eyes meet for a moment that lasts too long.

A quiet cough rips their gazes apart, and Anne is instantly cupping Marcy's cheek as she comes to, chest shaking as she hacks and wheezes in the slight smoke still remaining from the battle.

"Marcy?" Sasha asks softly, and a tear drips onto her friend's forehead. Sasha brushes it away with a finger as Marcy finally opens her eyes.

They are dark brown and confused and terrified and hers, completely hers again.

"Where am I?" she asks, and her voice may be hoarse but it belongs to her, and Anne bites back a sob at the sound of it, for the first time in weeks.

"Andrias's palace," Anne answers, smiling down at her. "Or... Well, the ruins of it. We may have made a bit of a mess. But that's okay! Because we forgive you, Marcy. We forgive you for everything."

She thinks she will never tire of saying her name. It's like her parent's restaurant food; a taste of home.

But Marcy shakes her head. "Who are you?"

There is a thud in her stomach, and Anne forces a laugh. "Come on, Marcy... It's us."

Marcy stares at her, and fear begins swirling in her chest, shortening her breath, because there is no recognition in those dark brown eyes.

"This is not the time to be making jokes, Mar-Mar," Sasha says, a tinge of disdain in her voice. But Anne knows her well enough to catch what else hides behind her usual annoyed veneer; fear. Maybe even panic. "You almost died. It's not funny."

"Mar-Mar?" Marcy says, and Anne goes numb. "Who's that?"

"You, Marcy," she says desperately. "Don't you remember?"

"Seriously," Sasha snaps. "It's not fucking funny."

"I'm not joking!" Marcy tries to sit up, then lets out a groan and presses her hand to her head. "I have a headache. Symptoms of a concussion are headaches, dizziness, sensitivity to light, nausea or vomiting, mild to severe memory problems, confusion—"

"But you didn't even hit your head," Anne tries, eyes searching for some kind of hidden trick that she missed, one last curse from Andrias or the Core, one last joke the universe decided to play on her. One more thing that had to be taken away, because apparently she hasn't been punished enough. "I know you didn't."

Her eyes drip with tears, and she wipes her face with her sleeve, bringing her knees up to her chest. Sasha sniffles, then tries to cover it with a cough.

Fallen stars fizzle out once they hit the ground. And Marcy was the brightest of all of them.

Marcy slowly shifts out of Sasha's hold. Sasha's hands clench around nothing. "I'm sorry. I just... don't know who you are."

Anne grits her teeth. "Marcy..."

"I don't even know who I am," she says, blinking hard. "I don't know... anything."

Marcy knows everything.

At least, that's what Anne had always thought.

There was no such thing as her being confused. There was no possible reality when she didn't know anything.

And yet...

"I'm so sorry," Anne whispers, blinking her tears away.

Maybe Marcy's eyes belong to her. Maybe her voice is hers again. Maybe her breathing sounds the same as it always has.

But she doesn't have who she is back.

Something else the Core has stolen from her.

Her memories.

"I have to go," Sasha says suddenly, rubbing her eyes with her dirty sleeve. Dirt smears across her cheeks along with remaining blood, but she doesn't seem to care as she stands and nearly runs out of the room.

As if she can't stand to be near this Marcy who is so close to being her friend again, but not quite there.

"Where's she going? What's wrong? Is she hurt? That cut on her cheek looked pretty nasty. How did she get it?" Marcy cranes her neck as the double doors close behind Sasha's fleeing form. "Is she okay?"

Anne brushes back a piece of Marcy's hair unthinkingly, but her friend flinches back, frowning. Anne closes her eyes for a beat before she finds the courage to open them again.

Is she supposed to feel this hollow?

Is she supposed to feel this numb?

"We're going to fix this, Mar-Mar," she says, and part of her throat closes up, because she doesn't know how and Marcy has always been the one with the answers and Anne doesn't know how to find them. How is she supposed to fill the gap in her heart where Marcy's smile is supposed to be? "I promise."

...

"Okay," Sprig says, crossing out another idea as Marcy throws away the empty wrapper. "So eating Gertie's Gnachos didn't bring anything back. Neither did exploring the remains of the ant burrows, following the route of the scavenger hunt Adrias left for you that one time, or talking to Lady Olivia and Yunan, or having a sleepover with Sasha and Anne, or having a sleepover with ME and Anne, or—"

"We get it, Leaf," Sasha interrupts, her voice stretched with something like worry. "Nothing's working."

"My name is Sprig," he reminds her, tucking his notes away in his jacket.

"Whatever. What else is there?" Sasha's fingers tap the hilt of the sword she hasn't removed from her side since that final battle. Anne suspects she showers with it wrapped in a tarp to keep the water from tarnishing the blade, too paranoid to let it far from her sight.

"What if we..." Anne bites her lip as she thinks. Coming up with ideas has never been her specialty. That was always Marcy's job. "...Set her cape on fire?"

"What?" Marcy yelps, jumping back and almost falling. She catches herself before she trips, and Anne wants to cry at the way she's changed. Where's her Marcy, the one who fell on her face every other minute? "You are not setting me on fire. Well. Although. If it's absolutely necessary for an experiment..."

"I think there's only one thing left to do," Lady Olivia says quietly. She had insisted on coming along so they didn't wander the city alone, but her eyes track Marcy's movements so intently that Anne suspects she wants the real Marcy back as much as she does.

Sasha shakes her head. "It might be too much if her memories do come back while she's down there."

"Down..." Anne gulps. "In the dungeon? Where it..."

"Where it happened," Olivia confirms softly. She glances at Marcy, who is staring at them without comprehension. "It's our only chance."

Sasha reaches for the hilt of her sword almost unconsciously before she withdraws her hand guiltily. "Anne?"

Anne blinks. She's almost so used to Sasha taking control that she doesn't have an answer prepared.

But she looks at Sasha, and her eyes are shadowed with something that she can't name.

Maybe Sasha has stopped trusting herself.

Anne knows the feeling well enough.

But Marcy doesn't even know what their trust looks like anymore. She doesn't know what it feels like to grab someone's hand right before falling from a tower. She doesn't remember what it's like to push her friends into a portal home and risk her life staying behind.

She doesn't know who she is. She doesn't know what they've done for each other.

So Anne nods. "I think that's the only choice left."

...

The walk to the dungeon is slow, but they arrive right before Anne starts second-guessing this decision.

Anne reaches for Marcy's hand before she remembers who they've become and steps back.

"I'll go first," Sasha says, pushing ahead of them to lift open the trapdoor. She unsheathes her sword, her hand shaking slightly. Her boots clack loudly on the steps as she leads the way down into the darkness.

Anne and Olivia exchange a glance, and Marcy follows Sasha down before they move forward to join them.

The journey is shaky and dark, the only light coming from Anne's phone flashlight and the lantern Olivia holds. Marcy doesn't make a sound, and Anne can't tell if it's because her missing memories are coming back or if it's because she doesn't know what to say.

Sasha swears up ahead, and they emerge a second later to see a large cavern.

A large cavern, and a chair, and the tank behind them. It is drained of all its fluid that brought Marcy back to life, but Anne still gives a shiver at the sight. The room is mostly in ruins from the battles, yet it seems similar enough for Marcy to stumble back.

"Do you remember who I am?" Anne asks quickly, reaching for her, but Marcy snatches her hands away.

She tamps the sting deep, deep down.

"I..." Marcy starts, and stops. She rubs her head, swaying from side to side for a moment before she steadies. "No. I'm sorry. I just... something is familiar. Like deja vu. Deja vu. The illusion of remembering scenes and events when experienced for the first time."

"So you remember being here before?" Sasha asks hopefully, fists clenching and unclenching at her sides as she eyes their surroundings warily. "Like, can we get out? I don't... like being down here."

"Not... quite," Marcy says, taking a step back. Her heel catches on a loose piece of rubble, and she begins to fall back, arms windmilling at her sides.

It's only reflex for Anne to catch her by the shoulders and steady her.

It's only instinct for her to say, "Mar-Mar! Be careful!"

And maybe it's only habit, but Marcy shoots back, "I know, I know, thanks!"

They freeze.

Or, more accurately, Marcy goes limp in Anne's arms, and she freezes so her friend won't fall.

"Marcy? Are you okay?"

Marcy opens her eyes, and they are filled with tears. "Anne?"

Her voice is hers. Her eyes belong to her.

Anne's breaths are unsteady as her eyes begin to well up.

Sasha's sword falls to the ground with a clatter.

"Mar-Mar?"

And then Sasha is wrapping her arms around them, and maybe this is the puzzle piece falling into place. Maybe this is the feeling when everything that's empty in you becomes whole.

Marcy smiles, and the light from Olivia's lantern seems dimmer in comparison.

Marcy laughs through her tears, and it is croaky and ugly and her, it's her and them and...

And Anne had forgotten how it felt to feel like this. To feel invincible, like she can do anything, be anyone, accomplish anything.

"Sasha," Marcy half-sobs. "Anne."

And damn, if that isn't the most beautiful sound she's ever heard.

"You're back," Sasha murmurs into Marcy's shoulder. "You're here."

Anne can't stop crying.

She doesn't want to.

[hermannsthumb]

possible prompt for a university au: newt is the biology major who maintains all the fish tanks in the physics building at 11pm and hermann is the physics student who likes to wander the halls to think. newt accidentally flings water all over the ground and hermann trips, hijinks ensue.

earlier today I was thinking about how I wrote a college AU fic almost 3 years ago to the date, and how I wanted to do more bc its fun thinking about newt and hermann as dumb college students

----

Newt's not really sure how he ended up with the weirdest work-study job on the planet, but honestly, things could be much, much worse (he could be stuck down in the dining hall, or dealing with confused freshmen in the school bookstore) so he keeps his thoughts on the whole thing to himself. Every Friday at eleven sharp, Newt pulls on his grodiest t-shirt and a pair of long rubber gloves and treks all the way over to the physics department to set to work scrubbing down the fish tanks that line the classroom walls. Why does the physics department have fish tanks? Newt's not really sure about that, either. It's kind of an insane amount of them, too, more than even the marine bio department has. Maybe it's supposed to boost morale or something. Hey, look at these crazy cool tropical fish who get to do nothing but eat and swim in circles, sorry you're stuck inside calculating velocity and shit.

Whatever, Newt's not complaining about that either. Let the physics nerds have their fun. It'll be good for them to branch out a little, realize there's life beyond robotics club meetings.

Also, Newt likes the fish. They're cute. He likes to think they like him, too, because they're very well behaved when he has to scoop them out of their tanks and plop them into smaller fish bowls (the kind goldfish in movies always use). He's going to teach them tricks eventually—he had a beta fish once who would do a little flip when Newt tapped the glass a certain way because he knew he'd get rewarded with dried worms, so Newt knows it's possible. Just imagine, a hundred fish doing flips on command. Newt Geiszler, fish whisperer.

Yeah, maybe the job could be more glamorous. It's really hard to get algae out of the gloves, and he hasn't been allotted the budget for a new pair yet.

"Hey, guys!" he shouts as he pushes in the door to room 214. The fish don't acknowledge him: they just continue swimming in their giant tank. In and out of plastic plants and rock caves. The rock caves were a gift from Newt three months into the job, and so were some of the moss balls—stimulation is important for fish! He wouldn't want to be trapped in a glass box with nothing to do, either. "I bet you missed me. Ready for a clean tank?"

Newt always talks to the fish, even if they don't talk back, because he thinks it's important to build their trust. He'll usually keep a running commentary of his week as he scrubs the tanks, just get everything off his chest that he needs to get off. Stuff he's worried about. Stuff that went well. Stuff that went badly. Therapy's expensive, and Newt's student health insurance can only cover so much, but talking to fish? That's free.

That's also kinda why he does it so late at night and over the weekend. The last thing he wants is an audience. Because, one, talking to fish is admittedly weird, and two, no one wants a glimpse at Newt's psyche like that, probably not even the fish.

The first step in cleaning the tanks is relocation. Newt digs his stereotypical goldfish bowls and an industrial-size mesh wand out of the supply closet, fills the former with some of the special tank salt water, and begins the slow and arduous task of scooping out the fish and depositing them into the bowls. "I had the lamest week," he announces once he's about three clownfish in. "I was working on a group project Saturday—"

Then Newt stops, because he hears footsteps in the hallway just outside the classroom.

Serial killer, Newt's instincts supply helpfully.

No, Newt corrects himself, that's dumb. Why would a serial killer wander into the physics building at eleven o'clock at night? Why would anyone, period? He's probably imagining stuff. Lack of sleep, stress over his upcoming projects, residual embarrassment from his disaster study session Saturday, all of it culminating in Newt thinking there's someone there. No, definitely imagining it. Newt can only even get in this late to the department because his ID swipe card is set up with the right permissions—not even the physics students have the permissions he does to be in this late at night. Well, not unless they clean the kitchenette in the student lounge or something.

Or if Newt left the door unlocked.

More footsteps. Closer now.

Newt's pretty sure he didn't leave the door unlocked, because he thinks it locks automatically behind him, and he would have to literally prop it open for anyone to get in after him. But anything's possible. The door could've caught on a dropped pencil or a paper scrap or other weird shit that physics students leave around, and a serial killer could've noticed and taken the opportunity to sneak inside on the off chance a hapless young biology major was scrubbing slime off fish tanks in the middle of the night. Any minute now, Newt's about to end up on an episode of Unsolved Mysteries. The Physics Department Murder. The Disappearing Biologist. (Nah, neither of those are very good titles, but that's why Newt isn't on the creative writing track.)

Step-tap-step. Closer now; Newt's heart leaps to his throat. Step-tap-step. Step-tap-step. Pausing just outside the door of room 214. God, why didn't Newt turn the lights off? Why didn't he shut the door?

Newt reaches for the first vaguely weapon-shaped thing he can find—an empty fishbowl, because Newt's not going to sacrifice any of the fish for this—and, as the door swings open, hurls it with a cry.

The bowl clunks on the ground. Except it turns out Newt grabbed the wrong fish bowl, because (even though it doesn't shatter, thank God) water quickly begins to seep across the slate floor tiles towards Newt's serial killer, a pathetic little clownfish (Newt thinks this one is named Albert, because the physics department is made up of nerds who do shit like name their random pet fish after their kind) flopping around in the puddle. Newt's serial killer, meanwhile, cries out similarly, his arms windmilling as he loses his footing and slips backwards, his cane—

Oh, fuck.

The intruder is not a serial killer. It's someone possibly worse, actually: Newt's mortal enemy, Hermann Gottlieb.

Newt's not really sure at what point Hermann became his mortal enemy and not just some guy I have class with that I hate, but he can pretty easily say that they've hated each other since the moment Hermann walked through the doors of Engineering 101 and was deigned Newt's lab partner by the Alphabetized By Last Name Seating Chart god. Something about Hermann just gets under Newt's skin. It's not his prissy English accent, or his oversized sweaters, or his absolutely horrendous haircut, and it's not even that he takes every opportunity to savagely rip apart every single thing Newt says in class. Don't get Newt wrong, that's all super fucking annoying, but it's annoying levels he can deal with.

It's the stuff they have in common that makes Newt hate him. It's like Hermann's a slightly broodier and more angular mirror that reflects all of Newt's most egregious faults—his arrogance, his stubbornness, his social awkwardness, his desperation to be taken seriously—right back at him. It sucks.

Plus, one time Newt caught Hermann ripping down the flyer he put up on the quad for Anime Club to advertise his stupid chess club instead, and he's never managed to forgive him for that.

Newt may hate Hermann, but he's not about to let him land on his ass in a puddle of fishy water (especially not on a freezing November night) just because the subsequent bitching would be unbearable, and, yeah, it would be supremely shitty of Newt, so he leaps forward just in time to catch Hermann and his cane before he hits the ground. He's so impressed with himself with his amazing catch that it takes him a few seconds to realize that Hermann is shouting and probably has been shouting since he slipped.

"—bloody maniac! What on earth are you doing in here? How are you in here? Did you just assault me? I'm going to phone campus police, you wretched—"

"Hold that thought," Newt says.

He rights Hermann and snags the mesh net and rescues poor Al before it's too late, dropping him back into the big tank with the rest of his friends. Newt can't be sure, but he thinks Al blows a bubble in thanks at him. Maybe he needs to make friends outside fish.

Hermann is still yelling at him.

"I am going to tell the head of the department you're—you're skulking about in here after hours!" he declares. "You're a menace. Pay attention to what I'm saying to you, Newton!"

Newt sighs and turns around. Hermann's turned an interesting shade of red—sort of like an over-boiled lobster, or if he fell asleep in the sun for too long. Newt wonders if it's from embarrassment (almost falling on his ass) or anger (almost being knocked on his ass). Probably anger. "Look, dude, I'm sorry," Newt says. His face twists like he ate a lemon, and he hopes Hermann doesn't notice. Newt hates apologizing to Hermann. "It's my job to clean the tanks every weekend. You scared the shit out of me and I freaked out—it's just that, like, no one ever comes by this late. Ever." He decides not to mention the serial killer thing. Hermann might make fun of him for being jumpy or paranoid or something.

Hermann's scowl doesn't lessen, but he does nod. Plus, he stops shouting. That's as much as Newt's gonna get of forgiveness. "Hmph," Hermann says. "You clean the tanks?"

"Every weekend," Newt repeats. He realizes he got some fish tank slime on Hermann's button-up when he caught him. Oops. Hopefully Hermann won't notice until Newt's in the safety of his dorm. "Gotta pay for my textbooks somehow." Then he frowns. "Wait, so what are you doing here? I didn't know you had access to the building this late."

Maybe Hermann is the kitchenette-cleaning guy after all. But, to his surprise, Hermann sniffs and casts his eyes to his dorky Oxford shoes. "Er," he says. "It's just—I was having trouble working out a solution to a problem, and thought a walk might do me good. Chilly nights like this one always do. And I quite like this building at night—it's calm, and much quieter than my dormitory." He fidgets. "And—well—only don't say anything to anyone, but I rewrote the permissions of my ID card so I could come and go wherever I please ages ago."

"You rewrote the permissions?" Newt says. "What the hell, wouldn't you have to hack into the security system or something to do that?"

"Well, obviously," Hermann says.

Despite himself, and despite Hermann being his Mortal Enemy, Newt is genuinely impressed. "Dude," he says. "That is so badass." Since when has Hermann been a badass?

Hermann's eyebrows jump, and he blinks at Newt behind his dorky librarian glasses. What twenty-one-year-old wears librarian glasses? With a chain? "You think so?" he says.

"Uh, totally," Newt says. "What problem were you stuck on? The one from Saturday?"

Being lab partners for engineering means Newt and Hermann have to collaborate on pretty much everything, including their midterms. Their midterm is what they've been working on for the past two weeks. On Saturday, though, they met in neutral ground to work on it (a reserved study room in the library), and, after a stupid and massive argument that had the librarians hoisting them out by their shirt collars and threatening to ban them for life, Hermann called Newt an idiot and stomped off into the night. Newt still hasn't gotten around to giving the problem another shot. Whatever, they have another week before the dumb thing is due. Plenty of time. Hermann nods. "Yes," he says. "Er—that one."

Newt glances at the clock ticking away on the wall. Quarter after eleven. Hermann's delayed him a whole fifteen minutes. Technically, he reminds himself, he doesn't actually have to have the tanks scrubbed by Friday night—he has the whole weekend to get it done. Also, he kind of feels like he owes Hermann for attacking him the way he did. Accidentally attacking. "Listen, Hermann," he says, feeling totally insane for what he's about to suggest. But he kind of wants to know more about Hermann The Badass. "What if we went back to my place and worked on it together? I'll buy us pizza, and I have, like, a bunch of energy drinks." The pizza place nearest campus is open until three in the morning, almost definitely because they get all of their business from sleep-deprived undergrads. Plus, they have midnight specials where you get free breadsticks with every pizza. Newt could go for some breadsticks. "It might be...fun," he adds.

Fun? With Hermann? Hermann will think he hit his head or something.

But to his surprise, Hermann doesn't hesitate even a second before saying "Alright, then."

"Oh," Newt says. He honestly thought Hermann would put up more of a struggle. "Cool!"

"But I might need to borrow a jumper," Hermann says. "If you'd be so...courteous, that is. I'm a bit chilly."

For some reason, the thought of Hermann (Newt's mortal enemy, but also a secret badass) curled up in one of Newt's baggy sweatshirts makes Newt feel all weird and warm all over. He swallows a few times, because his throat feels a little weird, too. Too tight. Like he just ate something he's allergic to. "No sweat," Newt says. "Let me just get these fish back in the, um, the tank. And—" He waves his slimy, gloved hands. "Take these off. And clean up that puddle. Gimme—um, gimme like, ten minutes?"

"Of course," Hermann says, and gives Newt a small, terse nod.

From Hermann, it's a smile. Newt almost slips on the puddle he's so blindsided by it. Stupid Hermann, making him feel all weird and clumsy.

[sil-te-plait-tue-moi]

hello to all my lovely followers!

i’m really sorry that i haven’t been active for ages — in truth, i’ve just been having a total writer’s block right now and i’m not inspired in the slightest.

to those awaiting an update on my ethan hunt story, it is coming along. chapter 5 is at around 8000 words, and it’s gonna be much much longer than that cause i’m trying to fit two missions in.

i don’t think anyone’s still expecting a follow-up for the mitch rapp fic — it’s been months lmao, and i don’t even have a plot for it.

I’m gonna list my coming stories and some ideas, just cause i don’t want you guys to feel like i’m dead and not writing anymore, because i am. I’m so sorry, and i’ll be out of this slump soon (hopefully)!

my stories in progress!

william cage (edge of tomorrow: live die repeat); okay, so this is the consequence of a long drawn-out tom cruise obsession, and it’s basically porn with a plot, but i think it’s pretty interesting for what it’s worth; it’s also basically finished, so look out for it lol

pete “maverick” mitchell (top gun); ahhhh this is one of my favourite movies of all time, and omg young tom cruise owns my heart (especially cause i think it’s before he joined scientology), and it’s a series, got lots of (rough?) smut in it (ayy), and also quality goose content because 🥲 he deserved better

newt (the maze runner); yup, my newt fanfiction phase is making a return (finally oml); turns out i actually wrote loads of ideas down in my notes and just never developed them, so, right now, i’ve got a story in development and it’s basically ready to start writing soon; this plot is separate from my other newt story btw; oh and it’s basically smut so

legolas greenleaf (lord of the rings); i love this guy so much, and i have thought out (in great detail; eleven year old me was really intense lol) the future world of middle-earth, and i’m really proud of the plot i have lol, but it’s so hard to write and it’s so long and ahh i’ve been trying to write it for ages

my ideas in progress!

peeta mellark (the hunger games); peeta is such a soft boi and i really want to write for him lol; this may sound rash, but i am going to write fucking smut for this man (a bold decision for such an innocent boy lol); i went through a really intense hunger games phase at the age of thirteen and yeah

vincent (collateral); hello *insert tom cruise character*, we meet again; i’m so sorry lol but i was so attracted to him in this movie cause we always see him as the good guy so like him as a bad guy?—wheewwww; there’s also no fanfiction for this man so i’m just doing a service to the community like 🙄; (there will be mentions of smut in this as well)

edmund pevensie (the chronicles of narnia); i have always been, am, and will forever be that bitch who would die and kill for edmund (him in prince caspian can end me); this will probably be a series, i don’t really know lol

ethan hunt (mission: impossible); there are multiple story ideas in my notes for this man, and they’re all spin-offs from the main series (the world will be dead by tomorrow, and i want you to come over; long title, i know); there is a proposal fic in this and i have made it my mission to make people cry cause i always cry at proposal fics lol; there’s stuff to do with miller as well lol, as well as other characters; this is gonna be a long ass series lol (but it’s cause ethan’s hot af)

tony stark (marvel); probably smut, and that’s all i can say about it (he owns me istg)

yelena belova (marvel); bitch i fucking love this woman with my entire body, soul and heart, and don’t you dare hate on her 🔪; but i also know her character’s asexual in the comics so

clint barton (marvel); he seems pretty chill yknow, and he could definitely fucking rail me and hence ^^

benny watts (the queen’s gambit); he’s a hot chess dude and has really nice hair and hands, so obviously he’s the perfect candidate for one of my smut fics; thomas brodie-sangster, what’s uppp 😩

whitey winn (godless); an underrated legend, deserved better, hot cowboy, so need i say more?— i don’t think so; i don’t have anything but a sentence for this man lol, but i plan on just having the one story for this guy and having it be 😃 hardcore 😃 smut 😃

okay then! there you have it: basically my entire writing plan for the next five fucking years ig.

i really hope y’all are looking forward to some of the stuff on this list, cause i sure as fuck am. and please hang around to read them lol — it means so much to me when people leave comments and likes!

okay, i hope you all have a nice day! (please go drink and eat something as well!)

[lucky-katebishop]

I spent a month reading harry potter fanfics and here’s what I learned

So for the past three and a half weeks, I’ve been doing basically nothing but reading Harry Potter fanfics and now I kind of just want to talk about them. No one cares but future me will! I tend to get caught in obsessions fairly easily (for instance, two months ago was comic books and last month was video editing and then k dramas). I’m feeling like my Harry Potter obsession is fading which makes me really sad cause it was a fun ride. I went from Drarry to Hinny, time travel to alternate realities, obscuris Harry to Dark!Harry, MCU AUs to Doctor Who AUs. I must’ve read more than 50 fics.

I’ve learned that I hate Dumbledore

Snape makes for a great mentor but I will only like him with proper character development

also where did Snape being Draco’s godfather come from? I don’t think this was in the books? I’m not angry, just confused

I read a fic that was so sad that I was physically unable to finish reading it -- actually I read two of those, one of them was a DID fic and the other Voldemort adopted Harry

the Voldemort one is quite possibly the most tragic thing I have ever read and even though it’s been two weeks I still haven’t been able to recover -- I was only halfway finished too GOOD LORD

another fic I read that was so fucking depressing was a time loop situation where Harry literally couldn’t get out of and it ended tragically

obscuris Harry is interesting but I really only like the ones where Newt is actually involved but I couldn’t find any finished ones

I don’t like it when Harry’s appearance changes, it throws me for a loop

there was this one where Harry got sent back in time and his figure got disfigured and so he didn’t even appear like himself anymore

I just find it odd for Harry Potter not to look like Harry Potter, idk

I also have a headcanon that his hair is very curly rather than shaggy

I haven’t been able to find a fic where Harry goes back in time to the Marauders era and has the right amount of angst but the right amount of fluff

I’ve read some good ones where the Marauders travel to Harry’s time but like,,, it isn’t quite what I’m looking for? I’m gonna have to write it, aren’t I? 

this doesn’t happen with irondad fics, literally everything you’ve ever wanted you can find it there

I read one where Harry did go back in time but she (fem!Harry) didn’t really interact with her parents or the Marauders that much, she became friends with Regulus instead

Regulus should’ve been in Gryffindor

I’ve not only read fics where Draco has been a Ravenclaw, Slytherin, but also a Gryffindor. I haven’t found one where he’s in Hufflepuff

I’ve read fics where Harry’s in every single house - the Ravenclaw one might be my favorite so far, it had to do with him going to a different timeline where there’s another Harry and he’s a major dick

Hufflepuff Harry one was funny, but it got distressing cause Dumbledore didn’t trust him and tried to get him expelled

actually the Hufflepuff one made my heart hurt cause Harry was put in the body of a Harry who isn’t the boy who lived and barely spoke and was basically like an even more traumatized Neville

Slytherin Harry is everything to me and he should’ve been in Slytherin

Ravenclaw Draco is something that can be so personal

I’m tired of reading Year One fics, I get it, there’s a stone, let’s move on

Year Four fics are my favorite however, there was one (which is my favorite) where Harry’s a necromancer and in the graveyard scene he calls corpses from the graves alive to help him get out of there it was so cool

I am partial to Harry/Draco but Harry/Luna is cute

there was a Pokemon Harry/Luna one that’s adorable and I’ve read it twice already

I like when there’s a ton of lore involved

especially Hogwarts lessons - like ancient runes can fucking get it, I love runes fics

there was an MCU AU one where I read Harry didn’t have his magic anymore, not as potent as it was, but he did have ancient runes

LISTEN I tried to get into Dark!Harry but after that Voldemort adoption one I can’t do it anymore, I will start crying literally right now -- he just wants to be fucking useful! He just wants to be loved! Is that too much to fucking ask for? 

however Harry doing dark!magic but isn’t actually on the dark side is cool

Death Eater Spy Draco! It makes me distressed but also I am so here for it!

Jenkins if you’re out there I love you (if you get this reference I love you)

I read a ton of Avengers adopt Harry when he’s younger but I don’t care for younger Harry fics, I prefer when he’s a teenager and I don’t have to read the first few years at Hogwarts, it can get repetitive

Give me all the angst with Harry being a horcrux please, I’m living for the drama

Lily is not a fan favorite weirdly enough, when the Marauders are in fics she’s usually not there which is unfortunate because I just really want a good Harry/Lily bonding moment

one of the saddest fics I read was where harry, luna, hermione and neville find themselves in an alternate dimension where Lily and Remus are married and alive, James is a dick but has other kids, and every single person that had died in their world is alive

I don’t like it when there’s Ron bashing, he’s one of my favorites, but if I have to, I’ll read some of them

there was this Sherlock fic (listen, I went in fucking deep, it’s been a weird month) where fem!Harry is on the run from the Ministry because I don’t actually understand and Ron and everyone is out for blood for her

Eleventh Doctor/Harry is a pairing I was not aware of but I actually kind of love?

Master of Death Harry is fucking OP and I love him for that

mcu aus is something I never knew I needed

Holly Potter and the Midlife Crisis is fucking everything

So is On Punching Gods and Absentee Dads, I realized it was the same author when I read in the author notes that the author was going to some volcano convention thing and I was like this is way too niche for it to be a coincidence

I’ve read Tony is Harry’s dad, Loki is Harry’s dad, Harry is just weird friends with Thor, ones where Natasha is Harry’s aunt

listen everyone is related to this boy

I will not read a fic if it doesn’t involve Harry, he’s my boy, he’s my love, I care only about him and him only I’m so sorry

you know that meme where people say nobody’s favorite character is harry potter, the titular character? Well meet me! He’s my favorite!

in battle of hogwarts fics, Remus almost always dies. Why is that? Why do you guys hate him so much? It’s always half and half for Fred, I never know if he’s going to live or not

In all of the good fics I’ve read I saw in the collections area of ao3 the same collection and I was like! You get me! 

if it says Gammily’s Bookshelf on the fic, it’s gonna be a really fucking great fic let me just tell you that right now

Parseltongue gets me so riled up, I fucking love Parseltongue, it’s so cool

there’s a reason I usually filter out non/c*n but I decided to let it flow and I ran into a few that fucking d e s t r o y e d me why do you guys read shit like this, it broke my heart

that being said I read one that was really nuanced and actually really good but it’ll never be finished and I’m very mad about that

Either we have a better understanding of how goblins could be utilized  than JKR or we’re just ignorant of how powerful they can be

weird coincidence that I’ve read two completely different fics where Harry thought having a threesome meant kissing three different people

Dumbledore’s a bitch and I hate him, every fic I’ve read so far agrees with me

there is a person out there that is CARRYING the bucky barnes/harry potter pairing on their back and I hope whoever that is knows how much I appreciate them

remind me never to click on a fic that hasn’t been updated since 2015 ever again, C’est La Vie I will miss you so

this is just a fucking quarter of the harry potter fics I’ve read but thanks for reading if you did, let me know if you want to know some of the titles

[writingsbychlo]

💬 blurb request for ff!tommy smut?? honestly Chloe your writing is so good, and ff!tommy is my favorite and it would be such a blessing!! ilysm and congrats on 9k!

if you requested ff!tommy smut, I have rolled them all into one. because there was a surprising number, lol. y'all really thirsty for ff!tommy and honestly me too so here we go! I did y'all a little mix of headcanons and blurb, because all the requests were mixed. I tried to include everything from them all!

no more requests, the sleepover is over! I am just filling out all the ones left in my inbox!

okay, so, it's not like y'all haven't done stuff

I mean, he's hot, you're hot, and you're both mad in love

you've just not done that yet

but, it's been busy, and you kinda want it to be perfect

you had a whole weekend away planned, but it got cancelled last minute after another team injury that meant your team took over

and now, there's just a lot of pining

I mean, there's not much left to the imagination

you're no stranger to one another, a few showers and a lot of wandering hands has left you with a pretty solid fill of your imagination

if you really think about it, you can still feel the way cold shower tiles felt against your back as he scissored his fingers

or hear the way he'd groan ringing in your ears still when you'd go down on him before work

just to smirk all morning as it takes him hours to actually clean his head after a mind-blowing orgasm

not to mention the way your throat had been fucking sore after he'd gone down on you, a pillow over your face just to stop complaints from your neighbours

but you wanted more

you wanted to feel connected to him in that way, because there was only so much foreplay could do

and you were fucking needy

he'd whispered a lot of dirty promises in your ear about what he was gonna' give you, and you were waiting for him to deliver

this time was no exception

stumbling through the front door of your place

a pretty dress on a hook and a suit next to it, both still in their protective covers, waiting to go

steam from the bathroom was pouring out from under the door, and you whimpering embarrassingly as his fingers rubbed slowly across your clit, sucking marks into the skin of your chest where he knew your hemlines would cover

"tommy, please.."

"please, what, angel? tell me what you want?"

it had been a chaotic shift, a lot of adrenaline, and he'd smelled of smoke and been a little sweaty and dirty and he was pretty much entirely what wet dreams were made of

you'd been dripping since you'd gotten back to the station, and uncomfortable ever since

with your back pressed up to the counter, hair still dripping wet much like his own from the shower you'd recently taken, you let out another cry of his name

tracing your fingers over his chest, he twitched a little as you dragged your fingers over his nipples, and down, several spaces marked with raised pink skin, scars of all his saves, dotted between dark hairs along his chest and to his defined abs

"more, tommy, please.."

he grinned, head raising back up to capture your lips, and his fingers slid along slick folds

two slender digits easily slipping between your walls, pumping at the best speed he could manage from the angle

despite the relief, he wouldn't be enough

"no, more, like, I need you to fuck me, tommy."

"we don't have time, we'll be late for newt's birthday pa-"

"so we're late, newt'll understand. if I have to spend the whole night staring at you in that tight fucking suit, looking so fucking good I could pop, I won't make it, thomas. you hear me? 'might just die."

"you're gonna' die if I don't fuck you?" he'd tease, but slip his fingers free, raising them to his lips to lick them clean, and that fucking filthy look he'd get would take over his face. "well, I can't let that happen. I'd better fuck you real good, just to keep you in top shape."

"I think that's a good idea." You whispered, hands hooking underneath your thighs, fingers of one hand still wet as he lifted you, and your legs sealed around his waist. Only a second later, your back was meeting the bedding, stray droplets soaking into the fabric, and his body was following quickly after you. Kneeling before you don't he bedding, he was stretched out in all his glory, hard and toned muscle, dark hair trailing down from his pecs, and his cock tall and leaking, red at the tip in a way that made your thighs clench when he bobbed in the air.

Large hands pushed your knees apart again, letting out a harsh breath as he stared at you, gaze trailing up from your slick core to find you, propped up on your elbows. "You got no idea what you do to me, angel. Fuckin' hell."

"Think I got a pretty good idea." You whispered, red flush growing from his neck to his cheeks, but he gave you a cheeky wink nonetheless. Leaning down again, his lips found yours, a delicate kiss, and you bit gently on his lower lip, that deep and raspy moan you loved shaking along your body when he emitted it.

"You sure you wanna' do this? Want it to be perfect for you. Wanna' take you apart, piece by piece, make you mine."

"We have all night for that once we get home, you can make love to me, but right now, I just need you, Tommy. Been waiting too long." He groaned, your nails scraping over his chest, before your fingers were wrapping around his cock, his hips bucking into your hands.

"Well, if that's how we're gonna' do it, then flip over, hands and knees for me." The request jolted something filthy though you, and you did as told, turning over, before two large hands were palming at your ass. "D'you even know how good your ass looks in, like, everything? Fucking hell, if you weren't wearing heels tonight, I'd fuck you 'til you couldn't even walk. Maybe next time."

Lining himself up and sinking within your walls, your eyes were rolling back in your head. Thomas was by no means small, a voice in the back of your mind that was quickly silenced taunting you about comments once made, and the warmth of his chest covered your back as he leaned over you. Pressing several kisses along your spine, he gave you a moment to adjust, and you wiggled your hips against him.

Calloused hands were on your hips, holding so tightly you thought he might bruise, and he pulled back. One sharp thrust of his hips and he was sinking back into you, stretching you out all over again with a delicious kind of friction that made your jaw drop.

He repeated his actions, again and again, and you were sure you'd be getting noise complaints now, because you couldn't control yourself. His hands were everywhere, pulling your hair and rubbing soothingly over your body, every inch of skin being touched, and you were seeing stars. His voice was echoing in your ears, praises and groans, mumbles about how good you felt, like he wasn't making you see heaven with every thrust.

You could barely breathe, the building fire, the coil getting tighter and tighter, and when you finally snapped, it was with a few brief brushes of his fingers over your swollen clit. Your heart was beating so fast you couldn't barely feel it, but it felt like time stopped, groans and begs and the kind of grunts that only prolonged your own orgasm as Thomas came, pumps of searing warmth, until you were collapsing back into the bed together.

He rolled over, freeing himself from you to stare at the ceiling, and you copied him, panting for breath, and feeling like you were on fire. "Holy shit, that was incredible."

"I can't believe we waited so long for that, I don't know how I lived without it." He mumbled, head turning to face you on the pillow, and his body soon followed. Two fingers on one side of your jaw and his thumb on the other, he pulled you closer, leaving a passionate kiss on your lips. "You sure we have to go to the party? We should just stay here all night, and do that. In fact, we should quit our jobs, Just stay right here, fucking."

"How would we make money to eat?" You teased, and a cheeky look passed over his face.

"I don't know about you, but I've got everything I need to eat right here."

"Oh, you're so bad." You mumbled, pushing his face away from you when he let out a loud laugh, and you tried to scoot towards the edge of the bed. "What happened to waiting 'til after the party before fucking me until I couldn't walk, huh?"

Your legs were wobbly as you stood, wandering back towards the bathroom, and he propped a hand under his head, smirking as he watched you go. "Oh, you ain't had nothin' yet, angel. Just you wait 'til we get back."

[dmitri-smerdyakov]

Okay, I have got to say something. I wrote a more polite post when this TERF nonsense started last year, but she doesn’t deserve polite - we are past that point now.

🖕🏻JK Rowling can fuck right off 🖕🏻

No. NO. She does NOT speak for us as a fandom or for women everywhere. She is a vile person full of hatred for an already marginalised group, who has thrown so many people under a bus to try to prove her points - and now she is tainting the fandom to try to make herself look better, trying to convince herself that she’s right. 90% of our fandom does NOT believe in her spewed hateful bullshit, 90% of us do NOT believe in the cult that is the gender critical movement - for her to believe otherwise is frankly laughable and pathetic. If anything, 90% of the fandom are ashamed to be associated with her or anything she does, and would simply love her to vanish off the face of the earth.

There is no other way to say it: she is the reason Fantastic Beasts could end up cancelled after the third film and the reason why so many people do not want to continue loving Harry Potter. People are already going to boycott the third film because of her, and I honest to god do not blame them in the slightest.

For the past year, I have been saying that we should separate the art - Harry Potter and Fantastic Beasts - from the “artist” (which she is not, her writing is actually very poor - the ideas are relatively good, but the way she writes them are terrible). However, this can only go so far before we have to decide that no, that’s not good enough anymore. Every time we write fanfiction, draw fanart, buy merchandise, post videos, watch the films, read the books, even just TALK about Potter/Beasts - we are supporting her. She benefits from all of it because it keeps her work alive, which in turn keeps all of the problematic bigotry in her books alive too. We are enabling JKR and her TERF views, we are making her feel like she’s validated.

This is not easy for me to write. I do not want to abandon the series that kept me alive during my adolescence and early adulthood, the series that I still love. I do not want to see Fantastic Beast flop and cancelled, I very much want to see the full five films. I want to support the cast and crew who have publicly denounced JKR and her bullshit, like Eddie and Katherine. But me loving a film franchise is not as important as trans people being accepted and safe. My love for Fantastic Beasts is not as important as making sure that JKR knows she’s full of shit, and that most decent people hate what she’s shown herself to be.

She is the reason I am ashamed to be a Potterhead. She is the reason I am ashamed to love Fantastic Beasts, Newtina, Newt, Tina, etc. I cannot stand her or what she is doing to our fandom.

As of yet, I honestly do not know what I will do regarding a) the remaining Beasts films, b) my tattoos or c) the merchandise I already own that I spent good money on. Abandoning one of my special interests is not easy for me due to my autism, and the thought of throwing away or abandoning the things that brought me comfort make me feel sick with anxiety and heartache. It literally makes me want to cry because right now my options seem to be restricted to 1) continue supporting Beasts and therefore support someone who is a vile, inexcuseable, hate-filled bigot, or 2) abandoning Beasts/Potter even though it will mean upsetting myself to an unimaginable degree.

I honestly don’t care anymore about potentially losing followers who may be sticking around my blog for some reason: if you believe in anything this horrible excuse of a woman says, if you support her and her bigotry, unfollow me right fucking now.

As I said, I haven’t decided how or if I can continue to support the next Beasts film or the franchise as a whole (including Potter) just yet. I need to think and wait and not let my anger make me do something I’ll later regret (like throwing out items that have special meaning and bring comfort to me). I will continue the Newtina fanfics I’ve been writing for now, only because of my love for the characters and what the actors have done with them - and because I know there are people who‘ve been reading and supporting them both here and on my Beasts Instagram.

But I think I’ve made my position clear here: anyone trying to argue with me or claiming that she’s “defending women’s rights” will just be blocked immediately.

[nothingbutfangirlsmut]

“Flowers can totally be manly.” & “Just kiss me you idiot!”

Prompt: #18 & #44

Pairing: Gally x Reader

Fandom: Maze Runner Trilogy

Requested by Anon

“Can I request #18 and #44 with Gally that starts out really fluffy but maybe ends in smut”

Hope you enjoy! I felt a bit rusty writing this lol so I do hope it is what you wanted! Thanks again for the request!

Mature warning! Smut! 18+

Being trapped in this maze for over a year now has taken its toll on me. I've had my bad days and nights but thru it all I've had Gally by my side. Ever since my first day in the glade Gally has been like my knight in shining armor. Everyday since that first day I have fallen deeper and deeper for him.

I tried to show him how I felt but he seemed to be completely oblivious. He was always so sweet about my show of affection but he brushed it off to just being nice.

So here I sit in the middle of the meadow on the far side of the glade. Alone. Dinner just ended a few minutes ago. The sun was casting an orange glow over the glade as I twirled a flower around my fingers.

"What are you doing?" The deep voice made my head snap up.

There stood Gally maybe a foot in front of me. He smiled then stepped closer to me.

"I enjoy the flowers when I'm thinking." I said softly.

He chuckled softly as he sat down next to me.

"They are absolutely beautiful aren't they?" He asked quietly.

That took me by surprise.

"You like flowers?" I asked with a growing smile.

He raised a thick brow at me.

"So what if I do?" He asked with a hint of a smile.

I shrugged.

"Nothing, I just took you for more of a manly man that's all." I smirked.

He scoffed playfully.

"Flowers can totally be manly." He stated as he raised his head and pushed back his shoulders in a proud looking stance.

I chuckled at him. An amazing idea came to me making me move to set in front of him. He seemed taken aback for a second until I started picking some of the flowers around us. He watched me closely as I moved closer to him. My fingers worked quickly to wrap the flowers together as Gally watched me. When I felt it was suitable I gently leaned forwards resting the makeshift crown on top the builder's head. I leaned back to admire my work.

"Perfection" I said quietly.

Gally laughed but didn't make a move to take the flowers off his head. His soft smile gave me a sudden confidence to speak my mind.

"Gally, you know I have feeling for you right?" I asked softly.

The sound of his soft chuckle made my heart plummet. I'm a fool to think he'd ever actually be interested in me. I let a small gasp out as strong hands grabbed my waist. He lifted me just enough to set me on his lap facing him.

"I'd be an absolute idiot not to know that (Y/N). I just think you can do better than me. There's plenty of better options for you in this glade. Newt, Fry, Alby, hell even Minho." His voice was soft.

He was looking down at his fingers playing with the hem of my shirt. I gently grabbed his chin forcing him to look at me.

"You can't be serious? As much as I adore all the boys here not a single one of them comes close to comparing to you." I told him softly.

"Really?" He asked as his entire face lit up.

I chuckled at how cute he was.

"Yes really" I told him.

The next second I was being crushed to his chest in a breath taking hug. When he let go I gasped for air making him laugh. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to finally claim him as mine. He looked up at me innocently.

"What now?" He asked quietly.

"Kiss me you idiot!" I laughed grabbing his face.

The moment our lips touched everything fell away. There was no more glade. No more deadly maze. There was nothing but Gally and I surrounded but a meadow of flowers.

My hands fell from his face to his chest. His arms wrapped around my waist right before he fell back into the flowers. I went with him keeping my lips with his. Our lips moved in sync until I felt his tongue push into my mouth. I gave everything over to him. He was in total control. He chuckled softly against my lips then flipped us over so I was the one on the ground.

Gally pulled his lips from mine letting me gasp for air. His lips traveled down my jaw to my neck. He nibbled a tender spot making a moan escape me. The sound only encouraged him further. Before I knew it I was laying half naked in the meadow with Gally staring down at me hungrily. The look in his eyes made a shiver run down my spine in anticipation.

I watched as he pulled his shirt over his head exposing his toned chest and stomach. He was absolutely gorgeous. He rid himself of his shorts then hovered back over me. His lips met mine in a hungry kiss as his large warm hands traveled my body. I arched my back not breaking the kiss so he could take off my bra. I whimpered into his mouth when I felt him grind himself against my clothed core. His warm hands cupped my breasts squeezing slightly. I gasped breaking my lips from his. He swooped down taking one of my nipples into his mouth.

“Gally, I need you.” I whimpered.

I couldn’t wait. I didn’t want to wait. He chuckled but moved to rid us both of our last piece of clothing. He lined him self up. As he pushed into me I bit my lip to stop myself from whimpering. He was big. His movements were tortuously slow as he filled me. My walls stretching painfully around him. I hissed as my eyes closed tight. He stopped moving. I felt all the pain and worry leave my body as he peppered my face and neck with gentle kisses.

When he started to move again it was slow. His hands grabbed mine tangling our fingers together next to my head. It took a few slow thrust for the pain to subside. When it did I wrapped my legs around his waist pulling his body completely on top of mine. He took the hint speeding up his thrusts. He groaned into my neck. My entire body engulfed into flames as he continued to hit a spot inside me that had me seeing stars.

“Gally” I whispered.

His hips snapped against mine making me cry out. He chuckled repeating the action again and again until I felt my body tense up. An unfamiliar feeling swirled in the pit of my stomach.

“Fuck” Gally groaned.

He leaned up grabbing my waist to hold me in place. His hips snapped against mine at a furious pace. The sounds coming out of me were filthy. A stream of curses and the builder’s name.

One good thrust sent my body over the edge. I stiffened as my back came off the ground. I screamed Gally’s name.

“(Y/N)” Gally growled.

He stopped as his fingers dig into my waist. He twitched a few times then collapsed next to me.

As soon as we looked at each other we burst into laughter. He pulled me against him then kissed me softly.

“Guess that means you’re all mine now.” He whispered into my hair.

“Absolutely” I said breathlessly.

—

[finleycannotdraw]

Guess what? I’m re-binge-reading Good Omens. And here are some Obervations that I forgot about and some things I might put in fics. Also things I found funny. Basically my dumb commentary on the book.

Crowley actually flees Sister Mary. He doesn’t saunter vaguely away. He flees.

Ligur is rather more thoughtful than he’s portrayed in the show

Anathema likes to read about herself, and her teachers are confused because she spells words like Agnes Nutter

Crowley apologizes

By page 41, it is mentioned at least twice that Aziraphale and Crowley Do Not choose each other’s company for any reason other than that they are constants, that they have an Arrangement, and that they are Friends because being Enemies got boring.

Aziraphale blushes!!!!!!

The Drunk Scene is fuckin hilarious and it’s actually a lot longer than it is in the show, and really you ought to read it. (Book pages 47-50)

My mom (who has a PhD in human development) would probably like to talk to Crowley about upbringing because they seem to agree on how important it is

War has always looked 25, and had a vulture that died of fatty degeneration

Pollution is very cleverly compared to actual pollution

Warlock has Kermit the frog overalls, and Nanny Ashtoreth is described as someone who “advertises unspecified but strangely explicit services in certain magazines”. The tutors are present for about four paragraphs. Warlock is good at math and likes banana flavored bubblegum.

Crowley has a slice of angel cake. Aziraphale eats it. Aziraphale also eats deviled eggs. Hm.

Crowley calls Aziraphale angel casually enough to suggest he’s been doing it for a long time

Some girl at Warlock’s party calls Aziraphale a f*ggot

Crowley glares suspiciously at a gerbil. It is suggested that Hell has, in the past, sent hell-gerbils in place of hellhounds.

“Oh dear,” muttered Aziraphale, not swearing with the practiced ease of one who has spent six thousand years not swearing, and who wasn’t going to start now.

Adam and his friends play in a place called The Pit, where shopping carts go to die, apparently

Crowley is the first one to mention sides in the book!??!? Also Crowley goes on about how humans are more evil than Hell (but he calls himself evil—is he calling himself human already?)

Aziraphale yells “get off the road, you clown!”

“What’s a velvet underground?” *love confession???* “you wouldn’t like it”

Aziraphale is a bit rude to Crowley in the “flashes of love” scene and Crowley is less panicked about it

Crowley glares at the Bentley and it fixes itself

Anathema’s bike is called Phaeton

COULD THEY ACT ANY MORE MARRIED OH MY GOD

Aziraphale speaks like. Like ugh. “FlOUndeR on tHe rOcKS of inEquiTY”

“Thirty seconds later someone shot both of them. With incredible accuracy.” *cuts to a random pleasant story about Mary Hodges* *cuts back to where Aziraphale has fallen into a rhododendron and Crowley licks the paint before he knows it’s paint* dumbasses

Crowley does not slam Aziraphale into the wall

Crowley is actually pretty impatient and doesn’t argue with Aziraphale when he’s worried

“Nothing but dust and fundamentalists” “that was nasty” “sorry, couldn’t help it”

When the radio sings “Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me,” Crowley sings “for me” and then screams

Crowley asks Aziraphale if he’ll keep in touch, and Aziraphale doesn’t say tickety-boo, and then Crowley says “right” and feels very alone

the international express man is small and has glasses, and wears green woolen socks

The sword, which turns out to be Aziraphale’s, is described as having an aura of hatred and menace, which makes me think of how it could’ve gotten that aura from Heaven or from humanity or from War...

In the book Pepper has red hair and freckles, which makes it a cool comparison to War’s appearance and the defeat of War

Adam is excellent at slouching, apparently

Occasionally, as Aziraphale reads the book, he would very nearly swear

“He wouldn’t have said ‘that’s weird’ if a flock of sheep had cycled past playing violins.”

“If you had told him there were children starving in Africa he would’ve been flattered that you’d noticed.”

“...that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide.” (151)

Wensleydale watches David Attenborough programs

Shadwell’s voice is described as “the color of an old raincoat” and seems to fake smoking cigarettes

Aziraphales cocoa is moldy and solidified by the time he calls Arthur Young, and has a thin layer of dust on himself too

Newt says that the walls look like nicotine and the floor looks like cigarette ash, and he suspects both are, actually, coated with these substances

Newt looks a bit like Clark Kent, and people seem to like Shadwell for some reason, much to his annoyance.

Aziraphale calls Shadwell “dear boy” on the phone

Agnes Nutter called God a daft old fool #goals

Adam is wayyyy too good at video games

Smelling Anathema’s perfume makes Newt uncomfortable

Adam suggests that Pepper ought to have Russia cause of her red hair (huh)

Anathema and Newt actually have decent conversations?? Like?? Show??? C’mon, man. The show kinda butchered their relationship.

Trees, apparently, make a ‘vvrooooommm’ sound when they grow very fast

“He suspected that Crowley was from the Mafia, or the underworld, although he would have been surprised how right he nearly was.” Shadwell also thought Aziraphale was a Russian spy. Wow, Shadwell.

Aziraphale calls Crowley and actually says “shut up” to him, and then when the answering machine beeps, he tells Crowley to “stop making noises” and then he swears for the first time ever.

The fuckin’ footnote on page 227

“A sleek computer was the sort of thing Crowley felt that the sort of human he tried to be would have.” I like the word choice here. He’s not pretending to be a human, he’s trying to be one. That’s a really important distinction.

It never actually says what Crowley does to his plants.

Crowley’s flat is very white. Wow, Crowley. It just looks dark because of the lighting. Heaven imagery and symbolism out my ears, goddammit.

Why does Hell say Crowley’s name so much when talking to him?? Honestly, I think that’s an intentional dig at his chosen name, using it in their speech to scare him. Wow, Hell. (And wow, Finn, excellent sentence)

Whenever the book says something is shaped like something, it definitely isn’t that thing. “man-shaped” “dog-shaped” “car-shaped”... makes it pretty obvious they aren’t men, dogs, or cars, huh.

The code to Crowley’s safe is 4004. The year he “slithered onto this stupid, marvelous planet”... and the year he met Aziraphale, of course. Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt, Crowley, my dude.

Crowley consideres sticking Hastur into his car until he turns into Freddie Mercury but then decides even he isn’t that cruel

Actual text that I feel like nobody really agrees with: “Madame Tracy was by many yardsticks quite stupid”

“Do I look like I run a bookshop?” “...imagine me out of uniform, sir, and what kind of man would you see before you? Honestly?” “A prat.”

I’m crying. The fucking bookshop fire scene made me fucking cry. I’m literally crying.

“...on all fours in the blazing bookshop, Crowley cursed Aziraphale, and the ineffable plan, and Above, and Below.” “The police and firemen looked at him, saw the expression on his face, and stayed exactly where they were.” “...a crack of thunder so loud it hurt....” *the sound of Finley sobbing into their cat*

The shortest biker in the cafe thing is 6′2, what the fuck

War, Famine, Pollution, and Pop Trivia 1962-1979

“Pollution removed his helmet and shook out his long white hair. He had taken over when Pestilence, muttering about penicillin, had retired in 1936. If only the old boy had known what opportunities the future had held.” HMMMMMMMMMMM

“There were no bitches in Hell either.” I know it’s talking about female dogs, but I rather thought Hell was full of bitches.

“Why are you talking like a poofter?” “Ah. Australia.”

“gOsh, aM i on teLEviSiON?” (Basically Aziraphale gets passionate about stuff and likes to talk).

Crowley is actually an optimist and doesn’t dwell too much on how sucky the world is. He doesn’t go get smashed in a bar. He just finds Aziraphale’s notes in the book and heads to Tadfield. And also, his new pair of sunglasses just... materializes out of his eyes. And he likes to whistle.

“Death and Famine and War and Pollution continued biking to Tadfield. And Grievous Bodily Harm, Cruelty to Animals, Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping But Secretly No Alcohol Lager, and Really Cool People traveled with them.”

“on top of the pile a rather large octopus waved a languid tentacle at them. The sergeant resisted the temptation to wave back.” Honestly dude, if an octopus waved at me I’d wave back.

Wait Agnes was apparently talking to Shadwell and not God when she said yowe daft old foole. I dunno

Madame Tracy: You old silly. Shadwell: 

Aziraphale does not know how to get rid of demons. Canonically. “Had never done other to get rid of demons than to hint to them very strongly that he, Aziraphale, had some work to be getting on with, and wasn’t it getting late? And Crowley always got the hint.”

The road to Hell is paved with frozen door to door salesmen, apparently. The question is where it is, because the demons always seem to just stem out of the ground.

“Heigh ho,” said Anthony Crowley, and just drove anyway. I love this sentence during that scene. 

I bet Hastur gets really mad whenever he hears Aziraphale’s voice from now on

Crowley isn’t breathing the entire burning Bentley scene

ADAM. SAID. “But I reckon you can make your own side” AND WE FUCKIN IGNORED IT?

The temperature above the M25 was simultaneously 700ºC and -140ºC which makes me think of something I read about magenta not being real. The M25 is magenta.

I feel like “Agnes” is just going to become an inside joke between Anathema and Newt at this point, and it will drive Crowley insane because he knows who she is but somehow still doesn’t get the joke.

I’m six inches taller than R.P. Tyler, and apparently according to the back sleeve of the book jacket, I’m very similar in height to Neil Gaiman

R.P. Tyler thought Shadwell was a ventriloquist’s dummy, and then sees cows doing somersaults

“That’s terrific. Much obliged,” said Crowley. — “Funny weather we’re having, isn’t it?” “Is it? I hadn’t noticed.” “Probably because your car is on fire.” .... Also the fact that Crowley looks like a young man which I find interesting.

“The Four Button-Pressers of the Apocalypse”

“Where is Armageddon, anyway?” “I’ve always meant to look that up.” “There’s an Armageddon, Pennsylvania”

Famine is the one that says “that’s one big avocado”, and also, I find it interesting that War, more than once, talks about love. (All is fair in love and war much?)

Anathema threatens the guard with a stick, pretending it’s a gun

Aziraphale, of course, asks Crowley to sort it out because he, Aziraphale, is “the nice one” and then proceeds to sort it out himself. Because of course he does. Because what else could he possibly do.

I just ADORE THIS BOOK OKAY

I’M PROBABLY GOING TO READ IT AGAIN IN A MONTH

Aziraphale and Crowley are so fuckin married I can’t

[nothing-at-the-moment]

Rewrite The Stars V

Pairings: James Potter X Hufflepuff!reader

Bold: James’s thoughts

The biggest mystery of Hogwarts is not how the staircases move. Neither is the biggest mystery that why wizards use quills and parchment when they can use simple pen and paper and owls instead of telephones. Neither is the complete illogical concept of interbreeding between a wizard and giant resulting in the conception of a half giant.

The biggest mystery of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is; why is there a random giant squid in the middle of the Black Lake?

Of course there were some theories.

Dumbledore is an animagus who turns into the giant squid whenever he doesn’t want to deal with being the headmaster. Or maybe Godric Gryffindor himself is an animagus and watched over the kids in the form of a squid. Or maybe the Black Lake was a portal to a muggle ocean from where it comes.

The theories were endless. Not even Dumbledore knew.  

Only three people in the whole world did.

Newt Scamander. Rubeus Hagrid. And Y/N L/N.

In the year 1946, Newt Scamander, who had once been expelled from Hogwarts had returned to its grounds with a mission. A mission he had vowed his life to. Protection of magical creatures.

Now he had sneaked into the Hogwarts grounds with a very small-almost as small as a human baby-baby squid in his arms. He had to hurry because these magical squids couldn’t survive out of water for long, not more than two hours.

He knew he had somebody he could trust to take care of his baby squid. Rubeus Hagrid. Hagrid, a mere teenager at that time, had idolized Newt Scamander and they had quickly bonded over their mutual affection and care for all sorts of magical creatures. And he knew he had Hagrid to keep this little secret.

So Hagrid sneaked Newt and the little bundle he was carrying under a cloak into Hogwarts and he knew the best place for this little beast.

The Black Lake.

Newt and Hagrid had sat around the lake shore for a little over an hour as they watched the baby squid slash around and Newt gave all the necessary information that Hagrid would need to take care of her.

“What’s er name, eh?” Hagrid had asked.

“Calypso.” Newt gave a small smile to Hagrid and a longing look to Calypso and sneaked out of Hogwarts with his little baby Squid, now in the care of Hagrid.

Y/N L/N, being a close relative of the Scamanders was not unfamiliar with magical creatures of all sorts. Her uncle, Newt, would take her on numerous adventures around his suitcase. Y/N couldn’t help but grow attached as her curiosity and love for magical creatures grew.

Seeing her passion, Newt had decided to trust her with the secret of Calypso, hidden in the depths of The Black Lake at Hogwarts.

Y/N couldn’t be more ecstatic.

So from her very first night at Hogwarts as an eleven year old, she had become best friends with the now Giant squid residing in the lake.

She would visit her every other with treats for her that Newt had himself cooked up. And tonight was no different.

With being an animagus came consequences. Consequences in the form of impulses and instincts that James had been familiar with for ages.one of the said instincts was the peculiar urge to take a stroll and graze.

So that’s what James Potter was doing in the middle of the night today. Grazing around the edges of the Forbidden Forest.

Sirius would usually accompany him as Padfoot but he was busy tonight with comforting a heart broken Remus. James would’ve stayed too, he wanted to. But Sirius had kicked him out saying that because he sucks with dealing with emotions, he would rather not have James make matters worse

It all made sense now, why Y/N was crying in the courtyard today and why she freaked out when he asked to get Remus. He would be too if that had happened to him.

But what made him really lonely tonight was the lack of thoughts his soulmate had directed to him today. Soulmates could control their thoughts and send only the ones they want to send to their soulmate. Mostly it was involuntary. But if a person tries very hard, they could stop their thoughts from being reflected to their soulmate.

So, James was worried. A lot.

What could be so personal to his soulmate that she couldn’t even have him know it?

He was worried, but also a little hurt, knowing that his soulmate didn’t trust him enough with it even though he has never hid anything from her.

While James was thinking about it, he saw a figure sitting with her legs in the lake water playing with a…something.

He couldn’t make out what he was playing it but he was curious and lonely and way too confident for his own good. So he, of course went closer.

Thinking that he was in his animagus form, no one would recognize him, and he went and sat next to the figure that turned out to be Y/N…playing with a giant tentacle.

The stag that came and sat beside her stared at her with big Bambi eyes (pun intended) and then shifted his eyes to Calypso’s tentacle.

Y/N gave a gentle smile to the stag and James visibly relaxed when he saw that the tentacle of the Giant Squid was not harming anybody.

Why was Y/N playing with The Giant Squid? Is that allowed?

“Hello. I’m Y/N. And who might you be? I didn’t know the forest had stags. Do you have a name?” James just stared at her and at the hand curled around the tentacle.

“I have a little something you might like.” She rummaged inside the satchel around her shoulder and pulled out a few berries and laid them down in front of the deer.

James hungrily gobbled down the berries.

Y/N chuckled and James would’ve smiled at the sound of her laugh if he was in his human form right now.

“How about I name you Rudolf, eh? No? Too long. Not original even. How about Rudy?” James was too busy marveling at the gentleness with which she was dealing with him and the gentleness of her hand that was still caressing the tentacle.

“Rudy, this is Calypso. She’s a giant squid. Calypso, this is Rudy.” The tentacle moved from Y/N arms and tapped Rudy’s on the head between his prongs twice.

James, for a lack of a better word, was taken aback.

The Giant Squid was girl?! Rudy?!

Needless to say, James was mostly confused.

“I come here every other night when I need to think. Also to feed Calli with treats my uncle makes for her. She’s great company. You’re welcome to join.”

James was positively curious. He has never had any encounters with the Giant Squid except that one time Peter felt something brush against his back when they all were swimming gin the lake. To know that Y/N, had almost daily encounters with her, and fed her too, baffled him.

Guess The Giant Squid was not Dumbledore after all.

“I was just about to tell Calypso what a crappy day I had. It was all good till last night. I was having a blast with my soulmate. He was tutoring me and helping me with my homework till late. Now I thought it was Remus who I was talking to last night but when I went for breakfast and I thanked Remus for his help, he told me that he doesn’t take the subject with which my soulmate helped last night.”

James was listening very intently.  Many soulmates help each other with homework till late, right?

“I couldn’t bear to be with Remus after finding out. I have always wanted him to be my soulmate and I was so happy when I thought he was but then…this happened. Merlin, fate’s such a bitch. But that’s not even the worst thing that happened today. Because I found out who my actual fucking soulmate is. And he couldn’t have been worse.”

James’s curiosity was bubbling in his chest. He had a weird feeling in his stomach as he waited for her to reveal her soulmate’s name.

“I was crying in the courtyard after Remus. It was raining. Apparently James Potter thought I was dead so he came to help me and after I sat up, I burst on him. Merlin, that was so embarrassing. He too was so awkward through all of it. I hate him so much.”

James let out a guttural sound from the back of his throat in protest. He was not used to people hating him. Y/N just thought he was hungry and gave him a few more berries. James didn’t mind.

Calypso’s tentacle now rested on her shoulders as if she was trying to comfort her. Y/N felt like Calypso knew where this was going.

“To cheer me up, he was telling me some random octopus fact. The thing was that, I already knew that octopus eat themselves when they get stressed. The idiot forgot that not all octopuses do it. It’s a disease, an infection of sorts that attacks the nervous system sometimes when octopuses get bored or stressed out because of captivity. He knows that but forgot. Moron.”

James was growing more curious and scared and suspicious at this point. The thing about the octopus was not a commonly known fact and his soulmate had told him that she’s sure no one but her knows that at Hogwarts.

A thought occurred in his head but he quickly brushed it out. It couldn’t be. Could it?

“He told me that his soulmate had told him that fact. I was getting really scared because not too long ago, I had told my soulmate that fact. He was going on about his soulmate. About the things she had told him. And I realized that I had told my soulmate all those things. Lobsters, Basilisks, my unicorn and giant dream that I had a week ago. The fact that I want to be a magizoologist. It didn’t help that this morning my wrist was showing some dude riding the latest broomstick model and throwing Quaffles.  James Potter is the Gryffindor captain and a total Quidditch maniac!”

James was not being able to process everything being told to him. He had had that exact dream today. It was too much for him to take in. Unbelievable.

“James Potter is my soulmate.”

As soon as she said it, it sank into James’s mind. But he still couldn’t move.

“When I realized it, I ran away. I have been blocking my thoughts the entire day. I don’t want him to know. He’s been obsessed with Lily Evans for four years. He’s not anymore, she’s with Xander, but I can’t. I have hated him for three years. He has hated me for three years! This has to be a mistake…”

Only one thought ran through James’s head. Y/N looked down at her wrist as it tingled reflecting the one thought. James looked at her wrist to confirm it.

Holy Shit.

As soon as he saw that on her wrist, he did what his soulmate had done the same morning.

He blocked his thoughts and ran.

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Sweet Pandemonium - Gally (The Maze Runner) Part 15 of 16

I think...maybe two or three chapters left? Four at the most. So, yeah, coming to a close pretty soon and I don’t know how to feel about it lmao.

fuck I forgot to tag: @multifandom-fangirl4​

~~~~~~~~~~

(bruh it’s so hard finding different gifs every post, I spend literal MINUTES finding some. smh, make more gifs. and yes, i’m being sarcastic)

You awoke panicked, sitting up with a gasp.

You looked to your surroundings and realized you could barely see anything, save for flickering red lights to the right and left of you.

You felt the floor beneath you, cold and coating your exposed skin with grease, the smell of your own sweat and copper filling your nostrils, the scent so strong that it made you feel nauseous.

You couldn’t remember anything, why couldn’t you remember anything? Where the hell were you?

The dark room you were in jerked, making you grab some sort of chain link fence that was behind you for support. The room started to shoot up, and the word elevator popped into your mind.

The clanking and scraping of the metal moving against each other pierced your eardrums, the overstimulation of foul smells and noises started making you feel lightheaded and you could’ve sworn you would pass out if something didn’t stop.

The elevator suddenly stopped, and you dreaded what would come next.

Overhead doors suddenly opened, bright sunlight shining into the Box, making you shield your eyes with your forearm.

You heard a crowd above you, some whispering, some talking loudly over one another, but all where seeming to say one thing. “It’s a girl!”

Suddenly being jolted forward, you were in a completely different area then you were before, but you remembered everything this time. You were in a field, the grass so tall it tickled your knees. You almost smiled at the feeling, but a loud screech stopped you from doing so.

You looked ahead of you to see you were at the Maze doors. What...?

A slew of different screams echoed in your ears, familiar screams. You could only make out a few. I saw you, you did this! Ben...You shouldn’t be here! Alby... Help! Thomas... Y/N...

“Gally?” You voiced, wavering in panic.

Another animalistic screech echoed, and you looked in the direction it came from.

From the end of the main corridor of the Maze entrance, you heard a mechanical whirring and soon, you could see it. A Griever coming into view. Your blood ran cold as you saw something, no, someone in the Griever’s mouth. You could hear whimpering that forced tears to your eyes. Jeff...

You turned around, knowing you had to get out of there if you were going to stay alive. But did you actually want to?

The screech that somehow sounded even closer to you made your legs move on their own, bolting away from the creature and running for the Homestead in the Glade.

As you ran, you quickly noticed your legs moved slower than you wanted, like you were running through water. “No, come on!” You cried out, willing yourself to move faster. “Please...”

Your legs moved faster, but by then it was too late.

The Griever caught you, its tail wrapping around you leg and pulling you to the ground. It’s grotesque body hovered above you, making you cry out for help. But a familiar situation suddenly played out. “Leave her alone!”

“No, please, don’t do this. She won’t be able to handle it!”

Before you could even question who you just heard, a boy ran up to you with a machete in hand, quickly stabbing the monster and pulling you out of its grasp. 

“Gally?”

He didn’t say anything, just smiled as he pulled you along with him. But you were distracted once again when you heard some sort of outside echoed voice. “Like I told you before, if you can’t handle this, you can leave.”

The distraction caused you to trip over your own feet, faceplanting into the ground while the boy beside you did nothing to help you.

The Griever soon caught up, and you looked to Gally in panic as he stepped in front of you. “What are you doing?”

“I love you, Y/N.”

“No!” You screeched as the Griever grabbed Gally with its jaws, tearing into his flesh, his blood spraying into your face as you watched helplessly. “No...it should’ve been me...it should’ve been me...”

“Okay, we have enough, take her out.”

You laid limp as you came back to reality, seeing yourself back in the same lab room that you had to be in for the past months. You looked to your left to see your cousin look at you with tears in her eyes, obviously feeling remorse.

You tried not to freak out when the doctors were unstrapping you from the machine, Teresa immediately came into the room to help you walk out of the room and you somehow felt comfortable in her grasp compared to the other medical professionals.

“You’re doing so well, Y/N.” Teresa cooed into your ear.

Being sat down on your bed in Teresa’s spare bedroom felt like laying on clouds, and you suddenly felt guilty for being related to her, being treated with kindness compared to what Minho was most likely going through. You couldn’t help the tear that fell down your cheek.

“It’s over, you can rest now.” Teresa affirmed. “I have to go though. I’m giving Shai her treatment. And it was only possible with your help, Y/N. You’re going to save her life today.” She smiled, caressing your head before she walked out, leaving you alone. 

As soon as you heard the front door click shut, all your pain and fear poured out in thick tears, instantly coating your pillow in salty wetness. You kept thinking about what you saw in your hallucinations, seeing Gally get killed over and over. But it wasn’t Gally, you tried telling yourself. Gally was still alive and well just miles from where you were now. He was alive and he loved you. 

You kept repeating that to yourself until you fell asleep.

“Hey...” You heard as you where gently shook awake.

You looked up to see your cousin, tears trailing down her face. You quickly sat up. “What’s wrong?”

“It worked...the serum worked, but only for a few hours.” She frowned, bringing the back of her hand up to wipe some of her tears away.

“What happened? Is Shai...?”

“She was lost to the Flare.”

You didn’t know what to do, so you pulled her into a hug, surprising both her and yourself. “I’m so sorry, Teresa.”

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” She told herself and exhaled a breath shakily. “I just don’t want to be here right now, in this building.”

You hated yourself for seeing such an easy opening, but you had to take it. “Wanna go for a walk? It helped me when I did it.”

Teresa contemplated it for a moment, before she nodded her head weakly. 

You waited by the front door as Teresa dressed out of her doctor attire, coming back to join you with some more casual clothing.

You walked side by side with her, subtly looking around for any sign of your outside friends and allies. You knew Teresa was numbly walking around, only really making sure you were in her supervision, so you guided her where you knew Thomas would be near.

You heard Teresa gasp softly, and you smiled internally, knowing that Thomas was finally here. “Did you see that?”

“See what?” You played dumb.

Teresa didn’t answer as she bolted in the direction she saw Thomas, not even paying attention that you weren’t trying to keep up with her pace. “Thomas?” Teresa called out.

Teresa followed him until she reached an area where nobody was, due to the curfew, but she didn’t care, she had to know what he was doing there.

When you finally caught up with your cousin, she was already talking to Thomas, but you kept out of sight. Then, a shadowy figure stepped out from an alleyway and knocked out Teresa. “That wasn’t the plan!” Thomas whisper yelled.

“You really think she wouldn’t try to fight back? I’m not taking that chance.” A familiar voice argued.

“What did you do?” You voiced harshly, startling the two. The figure turned around, finally seeing it was Gally, but you couldn’t help but feel some anger about how he went about the plan. “You didn’t have to do that.”

Gally frowned. but kept his hold on your unconscious cousin. “Let’s just get out of here before someone sees us.” Thomas scowled at Gally before taking off back to their base.

You didn’t say anything as you passed by Gally, silently glancing at Teresa before focusing on Thomas’ retreating figure.

The journey back to the abandoned church was a tense silence, but by the time you all were almost there, Teresa had begun to regain consciousness. You watched as Gally sat down and tied your cousin to a chair, nodding to the others when he knew she wasn’t going anywhere.

Newt walked up and took the bag off of Teresa’s head when she started to stir uncomfortably, startling her with the sudden movement. Her eyes widened when she saw everyone in front of her, all seeming indifferent or angry at her. But when she saw who was sitting next to you, she couldn’t help but speak out. “Gally? You’re alive?”

Gally didn’t respond to her surprise, only scowling before taking a breath. “Here’s how this is gonna go, we’re going to ask you some questions and you’re going to tell us exactly what we need to know. We’ll start off simple,” Gally grabbed a chair, moving it in front of Teresa. “where’s Minho?”

Teresa shook her head slightly, looking back and forth between you and Thomas. “Wait, you guys can’t seriously think-”

Teresa was cut off by Gally placing the chair in front of her roughly and sat down, obscuring her vision from you and Thomas. “Don’t look at them. Why’re you looking at them? Look at me. They’re not gonna help you.” Teresa looked to you one more time, and she quietly sighed when she realized this was your plan all along. “We know you have Minho in the building. Where?”

Teresa frowned. “He’s with the others in holding. Sub level 3.”

“How many others?” Newt asked.

“28.” She answered reluctantly.

“I can make that work.” Brenda smirked.

“No, no, you guys don’t understand. The whole level’s restricted. You can’t get in without a thumb print ID.”

“That’s why you’re gonna come with us.” Thomas voiced.

“Well, I don’t know.” Gally said, making everyone confused. “We don’t necessarily need her. Right?” He got up and walked to the table, grabbing a medical scalpel. “Not all of her. We just need her finger.”

“Gally, back off.” Thomas quickly ordered.

“What, you squeamish? She’s done all lot worse to Y/N and she’s doing the same to Minho.” Gally voiced angrily.

You rolled your eyes, getting up and putting a hand on Gally’s shoulder to calm him down, Thomas getting up to take the blade out of his hand. “That’s not the plan.”

“Won’t make a difference.” Teresa said. “Do whatever you want to me. You still won’t get through the front door. The sensors will pick you up the sec-”

“We know. We’re tagged. Property of W.C.K.D.” Thomas interrupted, holding up the scalpel. “You’re gonna help us with that too.”

Not liking the idea of being cut open, you were thankful that Frypan volunteered to get his tag out first. But that also meant you’d have to deal with Gally. Now that wouldn’t be a problem at all, but seeing that you had some sort of empathy for your cousin rubbed him the wrong way, he just didn’t know id he wanted to bring it up or not.

“Y/N?”

You smiled weakly at the boy in front of you, not bothering to hide your exhaustion. “Hey, Gal.”

“Are you okay? You seem...out of it.”

You were, mostly from the simulation you were put through that morning, but he didn’t need to know that. It would just be another reason for Gally to hate Teresa, and for some reason you didn’t want that to happen. You convinced yourself it was just for the sake of efficiency.

“I’m alright, just tired.”

“I hear you.” Gally nodded, taking a seat next to you and grabbing ahold of your hand. He wanted to ask you questions, he wanted to know why you looked like you cared for Teresa. Even when it came to Thomas, he didn’t understand why he seemed to care after everything she did. But noting your exhaustion, he decided to push the question back for another time.

You noticed Gally’s small smile from the corner of your eye, in turn making you smile softly. “What?”

Gally’s smile grew wider as he blushed. “Just uh, remembering some things.”

“Oh god, what things?”

“A lot, like when you first remembered your name.”

“Oh.” You already could feel the cringe building in your gut.

“I remember how excited you were, going around the Glade, telling everyone your name over and over.” Gally smirked, obviously proud about making you embarrassed.

“Stop.” You groaned, hiding your face in your free hand.

“I actually thought it was pretty cute.”

You scrunched your face up when he poked the tip of your nose. You giggled, then humming in thought. “From what I remember, you made sure to remind me that I wouldn’t remember anything else.” You silently wished you couldn’t remember anything before the Glade.

It was Gally’s turn to cringe. “God, I was such a dick, wasn’t I?”

Your giggles stopped at his statement. “No, you were just angry and scared like the rest of us. You just showed it more than the others, I guess.” You shrugged.

Gally chuckled dejectedly. “You let me off too easy, you know that?”

You frowned, clutching onto his hand tighter. “You’re not the same boy from the Glade, not anymore. We’ve all changed.”

“Yeah,” Gally looked over at Teresa resentfully, “some for the worse.”

“Hey, lover boy!” Newt called out. “You’re up.”

Teresa picked up her scalpel with a scowl as Gally sat down in the chair in front of her. “Chuck should’ve lived, not you.” She whispered, voice laced with venom.

“Yeah? Tell me something I don’t know.” Gally countered sharply, trying to hide the pain in his voice from her statement he knew was right.

“How’d you even survive anyway?”

“Don’t know, must be immortal. So, you can poke me with that blade all you want and you’ll never get what you must want.”

Teresa rolled her eyes, starting to repeat the same movements with the blade like the last two. “No, Y/N would never forgive me.”

“You think she forgives you now?” Gally said, almost hissing in pain at the sharp sting at the back of his neck.

“She’s coming around.”

“To what? Killing children without worrying about concern for your conscious?”

“To doing what’s necessary to find a cure.”

Gally scoffed. “Right. She was a wreck when we found her, wouldn’t put brainwashing past you.” He winced when Teresa accidently ticked him with her blade out of frustration.

“She’s my family. I’d never do that to her.”

“Yet you’re fine with putting her into fucked up fantasies where she thinks she’s back in the Glade?”

“I always helped her when she came out of it, it’s not permanent damage.”

Gally turned to glare at Teresa when she finished removing the tag. “Didn’t you hear what you just said?” He voiced exasperated.

You were nervous enough to somewhat confront Teresa again, so seeing Gally walk away from her with a scowl on his face told you that they must’ve gotten into it. Just what you needed...

You sat down in silence, your back facing Teresa.

“Congratulations.”

“What?” You asked.

“You did it, you actually had me fooled into believing I had my cousin back. You must be proud of yourself, I’m sure Gally is.”

You shut your eyes tightly as you took a deep breath. “Guess now you know how we felt back at the Right Arm camp.”

“This is different, you know that. You’re a fine actor.”

“Teresa, I wasn’t...I wasn’t acting.”

You felt Teresa’s breath tickle your neck as she chuckled resentfully. “Right. So, volunteering to help Shai, it was all to get on my good side?”

“No.” You refrained from shouting. “I...I really wanted to help her, I did. Ant I was so sorry about the serum not working.” You paused to take a few needed deep breaths, collecting your thoughts together. “But from the beginning, all what this has been about was saving Minho. No matter what.”

“But you just thought to throw in some gut punches for fun, huh?” She stated softly.

You stayed silent as Teresa removed your tag without another word, knowing trying to continue the conversation wouldn’t end well. You turned around to see her face twisted in a scowl, hints of wetness around her eyes. You felt guilty yet again.

Thomas eyed your frowning face suspiciously before he sat down in front of Teresa, watching you walk off by yourself with clenched fists.

You tried to ignore the stinging pain at the nape of your neck as you walked away from the group, willing yourself not to break down in front of everyone again, especially Teresa. You didn’t want to let her see her words getting to you, even if they might’ve been right. You cursed yourself for allowing your restored memories to make you see her in a different light, making you think you could actually be close again without complications like when you were children. 

You couldn’t so that, it’s what got you in the Maze in the first place, you couldn’t risk it for the sake of your friends. But...you still hoped, if or when all this was over, you and Teresa could go back to being close. But you knew something like that would be far fetched.

“Hey, Y/N?”

You turned around with a slightly panicked face, but you quickly calmed yourself, shaking it off with a forced chuckle. “Oh, hey Newt.”

“We’re about ready to head off.”

“Oh, okay.”

“You alright?”

You forced a small smile. “Yeah! Yeah, I’m fine.”

Newt wore an unimpressed look. “You’re not.” He deadpanned. “But, that’s okay. You know that right?”

You sighed despondently. “Yeah...but it’s not something we can afford right now. When this is over, I’ll have all the time in the world to not be okay.”

You were taken aback when Newt came up and hugged you tightly. “Whoa, what’s the sudden affection?” You chuckled genuinely.

Newt didn’t chuckle back, not even a smile. “You will be okay.”

“Hey, we’ll all be okay. We’ll get through this together.”

Newt finally let out a chuckle, but you could hear the bitter apprehension behind it. He obviously didn’t believe that. You didn’t understand where this was coming from. You understood him to be cynical most of the time, but the feeling you got felt darker than just cynicism. But unfortunately, you didn’t have time to question it before everyone was ordered to gear up.

You walked up the the table Gally was sat at, readying his shock guns. You grabbed a pistol, turning it over carefully to admire it. You used guns before, so you knew how to use them effectively.

“If all goes as planned, we won’t have to use those.” Gally voiced.

You stared at the pistol with a frown, sighing and holstering it to your side. “If.”

Gally stood up to stand in front of you, placing his heavy hands on your shoulders. “Everything will be okay.”

You sighed. “I’m kinda getting tired of hearing people say that.”

“Okay, everything is gonna go to shit and we’re all gonna die.”

You chuckled, moving closer to Gally and leaning your head on his chest. “Thanks, Captain. I really do hope everything works out.”

Gally brought his hands around you, leaning his chin on your shoulder. “Me too.” He said, placing a gentle kiss on your clothed collarbone. “You can’t just take a pistol though.” He said, pulling away and handing you one of his shock guns.

“It’s heavy.” You complained, shifting your body to evenly distribute the gun’s weight. “How am I even gonna get good shots on those guys?”

Gally smirked. “You just gotta hit them anywhere, the taser ammo will do all the work for you.”

“Ah, I’m sure I’ll find a way to fuck up.” You joked, kind of.

“No...” He drawled. “You’ll do just fine.”

“Y’all about ready?” Frypan called out.

Gally looked back to you. “Are you?”

You nodded reluctantly, not like you had any other choice.

“Then let’s go.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Unrelated, but I miss Austin and Shayley in Of Mice & Men 😞