#AT LEAST. we're not the only fucked up ones

[yes-no-maybe-soo]

Reminder that Sylus was released with:

6 4 stars & 6 3 stars, while the OG3 had 18 of each

1 bond, while the OG3 had 2

1 anecdote, while the OG3 had 3

1 free companion, while the OG3 had 3

No photobooth background. He only just got it after 6 months

No full stellactrum, as opposed to the OG3. For the longest time, Sylus was missing yellow and red— now he has 2 yellow and 1 red. Of those, 1 yellow was a promise card, thus locked behind a paywall and now no longer available.

In total, as of right now, Sylus has 34 cards, meaning that he still, after half a year, has less cards than the OG3 had upon release (41). Bear in mind that a number of these 34 cards were limited and thus no longer obtainable, while another portion of them are only obtainable through the Silver/Radiant Galaxy. So for new & F2p players, unless they are very lucky, they'll have to make due with the 17 standard cards available. Which makes real progress impossible. Sylus is not only P2W but basically P2P. If you missed out on his limited 5 stars and especially his second myth? You're fucked. B/c he still doesn't have his green 4 star solar pair.

The discrepancy in number of memories compared to the other LIs also means that the likelihood of pulling Sylus cards is drastically lower than the others — ~11-12% VS ~30% according to calculations made by a number of different players both on the CN and global side.

Presumably because of his puny amount of cards, Sylus' orbits are locked at level 80. That means that he has 70 less floors than the OG3. This, paired with his low number of cards, means that raising affinity becomes extremely difficult after a certain point, especially if you can't afford to spend a lot of money.

In addition, Sylus girlies need to spend twice the amount of stamina as other girlies in order to level up cards. Why? Because, in contrast to the OG3, he does not have a Bounty Boss dedicated to his prime Stellas (in his case Pink and Green). This means that we have to fight both Snoozer and Lemonette if we want to level up the majority of his cards.

Sylus girlies have been reaching out to customer service for months about these issues, and have either been given nothingburger replies or been totally ignored. There have been exactly 0 meaningful communication on Paperfold's side. No one is asking them to give us what we're missing tomorrow, but we are asking for some confirmation that our valid concerns are being heard and that the issue will be rectified. But so far... nothing. All that the CN girlies have received as of yet are attempted gaslighting and subtle threats. Is this how you treat any — much less your objectively highest paying — consumers?

I hope everyone can see how blatantly unfair all of this is, and understand why such a large number of us are angry and upset. We have been called greedy and ungrateful, but tell me, how is asking for fairness, for the bare minimum, greedy or ungrateful? We have never asked for special treatment, only equal treatment. The argument that all of this discrepancy in basic content is due to Sylus being "new" has never been and will never be valid.

To end this post on a somewhat hopeful note, the current boycott by the CN Sylus girlies have resulted in a significant drop in daily revenue. One can only hope that this will finally make Paperfold listen and rectify this mess, or at least communicate with their consumers,

Let me remind you that while this issue currently only affects Sylus mains, it will eventually come to affect all of us. B/c if they can get away with this behaviour with one character, then I guarantee you that the other LIs will be next. In fact, from the look of things, Caleb will receive the same treatment.

If you as a global player wish to help do something about all of this, I'd highly recommend writing an email to the company (loveanddeepspace-en@infoldgames.com). Additionally, there is talk of organizing a petition in support of the CN girlies, the link to which I will post on my blog, should it become a reality. While it might be true that global players unfortunately hold little sway, doing something is still better than doing nothing.

If you're curious to learn more, please refer to my pinned post for links and additional info on the situation.

Finally, if you've read all of this, thank you 🙏 I appreciate you for taking the time.

[yardsards]

this next part is just me bitching but. the main interaction that lead to me making this post (combined with just. all of the incidents of me saying my current job and whoever i'm talking to goving me wayyy too much kudos for just Doing This Job and me feeling sooo weirded out bc like bruh it's not community service it is a Job that i am getting paid for. and this job is easier and pays better than my past job as a cashier but no one gave me kudos for being a cashier.):

during a work holiday party me and a couple coworkers were talking about this pair of clients we shared

and someone brought up how the husband was nice but the wife was a grouch (in my case, she was a little sour to me at first but actually became quite sweet once she got to know me. apparently she had not similarly warmed up to any of my coworkers. which, by the end of this conversation, i realized Exactly Why). no screaming or hitting or any other kind of abuse, not even direct insults, just generally being a bit impatient and condescending and grumpy.

and then my (already least favourite, lol) coworker was like "i straightup told her she couldn't be talking to me like that. that i was there to provide help and if she was gonna treat me like that then i wasn't gonna help her anymore."

and all of our coworkers there, INCLUDING OUR SUPERVISOR, were congratulating her for "standing up for herself" or whatever???

and like see if she was a cashier or housekeeper or whatever i would've been like "hell yeah, get their ass, demand respect on the job" but in the context of this job it really just rubbed me the wrong way because like.

1: we have a significant power over our patients that most other professions don't have over their customers

2: i question if she would have said that to a customer if she was a cashier or housekeeper, or if she only felt emboldened to do this/deserving of a certain degree of respect BECAUSE of the power we have over our patients

3: while we absolutely shouldn't tolerate outright *mistreatment* on the job (as i said above, we're employees, not fucking martyrs), i think we need to be a little more discerning over what constitutes mistreatment than many other professions do. like we gotta be able to think "yeah this woman is in constant physical pain, knows death isn't far away, and now has to pay money to have total fucking strangers coming into her house to do tasks for her that she used to be able to do by herself. it's actually pretty understandable for her to be huffing and eyerolling here and it's not a personal attack on my ego"

4: the way my coworker talked about being there to help like she was providing a FAVOUR rather than just... doing the job that she is getting PAID to

AND THEN this mf had the gall to be like "it's funny that she's planning on checking herself into a home in the next few months. they aren't gonna tolerate being talked to like that there and she's not gonna be in charge there like she is at her house." and like??? idk man i just don't think we should be treating losing power via institutionalization as a justified punishment

i wish i could say that i had some eloquent retort about disability rights and whatnot to stand up for that lady but i was just too fuckin dumbfounded to say anything

i think i've said it before but. as a professional caregiver it rubs me the wrong way how our field (and pretty much any field that involves caring for vulnerable people) is venerated

like don't get me wrong i am all for appreciating blue collar type professions, employees that are underpaid and overworked and vital for how our society functions

but it's a specific flavour of treating us like martyrs that doesn't show up when people appreciate construction workers or garbage truck drivers or janitors or fry cooks or whatnot.

it's a specific flavour of acting like we're doing a huge selfless favour for our clients that doesn't show up when people appreciate customer service workers or housekeepers or whatnot.

what's really ironic there is caregivers have far more power over their clients than customer service workers or housekeepers have over their clients.

and it just leads to so much shittiness in the industry. it's bad for patients cuz they don't feel like they can speak out when a caretaker is mistreating them (or even just doing something they don't like, even on accident), cuz they're expected to feel grateful for what the caregiver is doing for them. and it enables some shitty caregivers to get a complex about how their patients owe them gratitude for doing their jobs. isn't good for non-shitty caregivers too cuz sometimes the good ones then feel obligated to overextend and sacrifice themselves to be worthy of that gratitude.

just like yeah idk appreciate us but don't appreciate us any differently than you should appreciate any other worker i guess idk

[jewish-vents]

Lost another friend and need to rant about it. This is gonna be long and all over the place: apologies in advance.

I hate how unfair the world is to us. I hate how all the good leftist principles apply to every minority except us. I hate how the world ensures we see that it treats us differently so we can feel totally isolated (we are) and give up. I hate how we aren't given basic human decency like everyone else. I hate how even as I write this, I fear being misunderstood.

I'm a "Jew of color" and the gentile who I am no longer friends with is POC like me. I had to cut them off because they have more contempt towards me (they also treat me like I'm the representative of all Jews) than white people.

I express my experiences with antisemitism and my sadness about how bad antisemitism is right now? They would tell me I'm insensitive and selfish because Palestine. "Just go outside and you'll be fine" but going outside is how I experience antisemitism. Antisemitism is a real thing, I would say. It's not just a few hate comments on a screen by trolls like Hitlerfan123. We are not safe anywhere and we can't hide. This isn't an exaggeration to trick you like the evil Jew I am. And they would just bring up Palestine again. And again. To shut me down and to shut me out. I would get defensive and they'd tell me that I'm acting like a white person. White tears. White fragility. BUT YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME, I would say. And they'd tell me I'm acting hysterical. That the zionists put me in some delusion where the world is out to get me but I'm actually fine and no one wants to hurt Jews.

"You're acting like a white person who says "we get hate crimed too" whenever a poc talks about their oppression" they said. They made a few comparisons like that. I tried so hard to get them to understand me. To acknowledge our pain.

Don't they know I can feel pain too? I observed how they would constantly post stuff like "minorities must stick together". They would keep an eye on hate crimes for everyone but us and actually listen to their stories. Do they even know how soul crushing that is? To feel so completely alone?

I couldn't even talk about the Holocaust with them. Every time I tried to, they'd have to say "the Holocaust isn't unique and all genocides are connected" at least once. And it's so fucking unfair. Why are we the only ones being told "we're not special"? These "you and your experiences aren't unique" conversations start and stop with us. I would never, ever tell anyone slavery isn't unique because slavery was unique. I would never go up to someone and tell them oh btw the genocide of your people wasn't unique. That's EVIL. And yet it only happens to us. Before anyone misunderstands me, I know right wingers routinely say this to minorities. But the whole bird mocks and belittles us. Regular people go out of their way to remind us "we're not unique or special". I shouldn't have to give a million disclaimers either. Only we are told our genocide isn't special. I honestly wouldn't care if the people who told me that said the same thing about other genocides. But they never do. They'll go on to talk about how unique every other genocide is and then come back to us with "the Holocaust isn't unique". You only ever talk about the Holocaust when it's time to say "everything's connected" and yet you're surprised I call you an antisemite?! If you can't talk about the Holocaust without mentioning other genocides and other minorities, you can't gaslight me into thinking I'm an anti-intersectionality asshole.

And then there's the speaking over us thing. I dumped my ex friends who were all POC/queer/etc for this very reason. I'm on the floor in pain sobbing about antisemitism and you think you know being a Jew more than me. I say something like "hey Zionist can be a slur towards Jews" and you immediately disagree and try to argue with me. "But my other Jewish friend said otherwise so I don't believe you". Or "This random Jew i follow online says otherwise". I have never been so dehumanized.

Can't forget the "weaponization of antisemitism" thing. I hear this all the time now. Who do they think they are? Gentiles have never felt more comfortable. They are afraid to criticize or say anything about other minorities and will even bend for them but with us, it's "Jews cry antisemitism". And as I said to my ex friends, don't be shy. Expand this convo TO EVERYONE YOU PRICKS. Tell POC they weaponize racism. Tell gay people they weaponize homophobia. And they never do. Because anything flies with Jews and Jews alone.

Okay rant over. I hate this world

.

[grapejuice32]

Payback

Rafe Cameron x Reader

notes: I'd be super grateful for some requests as I'm struggling with ideas at the moment <3

Had you pushed it a little too far? Maybe...but did you regret it? Absolutely not. Not when your actions had brought you exactly where you wanted to be. In Rafe's bed, his movements harsh and yet somehow passionate.

The two of you had been at some party on the beach, but Rafe wasn't paying that much attention to you, instead he was off with Topper and Kelce, as always, and they were surrounded by a group of giggling girls, everything about them fake, down to the way they pushed their chests out when breathing. This seemed to always happen, you went to a party, for Rafe, with Rafe, and then you always ended up either silently sat beside him while he talked shit with Toppe and Kelce, or left to your own devices, watching him let the gaggles of girls practically sit in his lap, their hands running up his arms or chest as they laughed at something he said that probably wasn't even that funny.

You had finally had enough though and so you had sought to act out in a way that would truly infuriate Rafe. Flirt with JJ Maybank. You never really understood what his issue with the Pogues was, but you always out it down to some sort of twisted jealousy at the fact they had real friends, real connection when all he had was a couple of guys younger than him that followed him like he was a shepard and them the sheep. Not that he'd ever admit that of course, but you know his hatred wasn't just down to their social standing like he made it out to be, especially not after his sister became one of the Pogues. No, you knew he probably just felt lonely and presented it as hatred due to some sort of embarrassment about his feelings.

But you'd never hated the Pogues, in fact you quite liked them, and had hung out with them at a few parties before. While you were technically a Kook, your family had become pretty much broke, loosing their financial stability after a incident involving court, so you were pretty much someone of Pogue standing, money wise, who was still living in the grotesquely overpriced house that your family had moved into so many years ago and refused to sell, your parents not wanting to diminish themselves by moving off of Figure Eight and onto The Cut.

So you felt full of confidence as you sauntered over to the group and sat so close to JJ you were practically on him, he just greeted you with a smile and swung his arm over your shoulder, passing you a beer. It must have been at least twenty minutes before your phone vibrated with a text from Rafe that simply read, 'where the fuck are you.'

Your lips had only quirked up in response and you'd pushed your phone out so that you could get a picture of you and JJ sat together, the both of you smiling at the camera. You had been quick to upload it to your story on instagram, with his user tagged and a white heart emoji besides it. Rafe's response to it came through almost instantly, reading, 'yeah, I don't think so.'

And before you knew it he was walking over to you, his pace hurried and his feet heavy on the sand, "C'mon, we're leaving." His voice had come, firm and infuriated.

"Mm, I dunno, I quire like it here," you'd slyly answered, leaning further into JJ who you heard quietly chuckle the sound echoing through his bottle as he brought his beer up to his lips.

Rafe scoffed a laugh, a humourless one at that, "uh, yeah, I don't fuckin' think so, c'mon, get your ass up an' get yourself on my bike."

And that's how you'd ended up here, Rafe's hand wrapped around your throat, the other gripping on of your hips so hard you were sure the signet ring on his finger would leave an imprint on your skin like a brand. There was a pillow tucked under your arched back and Rafe was slotted between your widely parted thighs, his hips rolling to push himself into you, each thrust somewhat harsh while being deeper inside of you than you can ever remember him being. You were seeing star at this point, he'd already pulled one rather intense orgasm out of you the he'd eaten you out like a starving man yet acted like he hated you at the same time. But now, your hands were on his back, feeling his muscles tense with each movement of his hips, your nails digging into his skin, creating crescent moons that would likely remain there until the next day.

"Think he can make y'feel like this, huh?" Rafe asked darkly, his lips pressed against your ear as his hand tightened ever so slightly on your throat, a soft moan escaped you in response, "hey, answer the fuckin', question, aight?"

All you could muster was the shake of your head followed by a "no," so quiet Rafe would have missed it had he not been listening intently for an answer from you, pulling back so he could rest his damp forehead against your own. "And who can, huh? Who's the one that makes y'feel this good, hm?"

"Y-you, 's just you, Rafe." you panted, the words coming out in a breathy whisper as your eyes squinted shut when he hit a particular spot inside of you.

You felt his breath against your face as he chuckled, "Yeah, 's me, not JJ, not anyone else. Me. You'd do best t'fuckin remember that." He answered, his tone sounding somewhat mean, which made sense to you when he suddenly stopped his thrusts and pulled out of you, his hand slipping off of your throat, casing your eyes to shoot open.

"Rafe?" you had asked softly, wondering what had happened, why he had stopped when you were so close to finishing. He looked down at you with a cruel glint in his eye, "What, y'think 'm gonna let you cum after y'pulled that shit? Nah. Y'can wait till tomorrow an if y'good, maybe I'll help y'out when we wake up, yeah?"

You looked at him wide eyed, your jaw dropping as he bent down to press a kiss to your forehead before getting up to go in the shower, leaving you on his bed, aching and unsatisfied.

Please lmk what you guys think, I'd love to hear from you! I'll also be happy to try and write any requests you may have <3

[blacknedsoul-blog]

Nevermore is a gothic tragedy. Part II: Supernatural Brides

I had set out to finish this saga of essays before Nevermore came back. And then I realized that all the fucking references I have on hand were going to require at least one essay for each. Which means a total of…at least four parts.

So I made it my goal to finish at least one. And since we're talking about tragedy, it seemed logical to continue with the gothic novel.

Before I start, I have to make a little disclaimer: most of my sources come from Spanish material that I'm not sure I have an English translation because they are loose essays I have from my college days and prologues to books from different publishers that are dedicated to publishing gothic novels. If you understand Spanish, I'll be happy to pass the material on to you if this interests you. But if you only understand English, I'm afraid I only have two sources for you: Supernatural Horror in Literature, an essay by H.P. Lovecraft on the foundations of cosmic horror that reviews the history of horror in fiction and The gothic quest a book of about 400 pages that describes in detail the history of the gothic novel, I hope the density of that work compensates for not being able to deliver more finished information.

Brief (seriously VERY brief) history of the gothic novel

Here is something a bit tangled, because the Gothic novel goes hand in hand with many of the topics of the literature of romanticism (literary movement with which it shares time) and it is also necessary to understand some historical and architectural issues.

Let's go by part: Romanticism is a literary and artistic movement that formally emerged in the second half of the eighteenth century (it is estimated that the first works of the same are dated from 1770, approximately) consisting of three parts: the so-called pre-romanticism, romanticism as such and late romanticism.

Anyway, even from its beginnings, this movement emerges as a series of anti-classical ideas that sought to recover folkloric and medieval elements, were obsessed with the inviduality of creativity, nostalgia for nature (something that would later become nostalgia for the time before the industrial revolution), considered passion and sentimentality as the creative axis and in general were looking to Greek tragedies and other fantastic tales as a source of inspiration.

This clashed with the strong Christian values of the time and the rise of technological advances. A contradiction that is present in the works of this literary movement.

Another important historical fact that is necessary to understand is that this kind of novel gets its name directly from Gothic architecture. These works were intended to take place in castles, monasteries, mansions belonging to ancient families and medieval cemeteries. The reason is simple: the Goths were considered shitty architects and many of these buildings had been abandoned for decades if not centuries by 1700, so you could walk down a path and simply find an ominous monastery or the remains of a mansion and if you asked someone where it had come from, they would probably tell you about 15 different versions, but all involving dead people and ghosts living there. As you may have gathered from the above, the writers of this period were eating this stuff up with fries.

It is with the convergence of all these elements that Horace Walpole's novel The Castle of Otranto was published in 1764. A text born from a nightmare that this man had in the castle of Strawberry Hill, a neo-Gothic property that belonged to him. The novel is mediocre at best, but it lays all the groundwork needed going forward: ominous ancient places full of legends where the crumbling architecture is a reflection of the moral and emotional corruption of the characters.

Feminine entities

One thing in which the Romantics differ from the Gothics is their view of love. In this era, love is perceived as a kind of force that is above the characters, something so beautiful that it is capable of making them completely lose their minds (this is tied to the concept of the sublime. And where the romantics embrace this concept as something beautiful, the goths say “this is fucking disturbing”.

For this reason many gothic stories are up to their necks in supernatural brides: beautiful ghosts dressed in white, beings that we consider references to nymphs who only need to whisper in the ears of their victims to become obsessed with them and, above all, vampires. Vampires whose description you will have in detail because the narrators of these stories spare no words to point out how beautiful they are.

Because these supernatural brides are there for one thing and one thing only: to make our sad male hero lose his mind with the power of their impractically long eyelashes. Sometimes they love them honestly and deeply, sometimes they are insidious, evil and lying; on more than one occasion both alternatives are true at the same time. But the reality of things is that, in the end, the love of these supernatural brides ends up completely destroying the unfortunate object of their affection.

If this seems a bit sexist to you, that's because it is. There's no argument here and it's not worth delving into any further.

I've talked about Annabel as a vampire before, but this time I want to talk more in detail about two issues: how supernatural brides work and the consequences for the protagonist of having a relationship with her and the similarities this story presents to a particular job.

Love and death

What is a ghost? A terrible event doomed to repeat itself over and over again. An instant of pain, perhaps. Something dead that seems at times still alive. A feeling, suspended in time, like a blurred photograph, like an insect trapped in amber. El espinazo del diablo, Guillermo del Toro (original quote in Spanish)

One interesting thing about this whole thing is, too, that while the attitudes of many of these supernatural brides may remind you of variations of a succubus (you know, a female entity that is there for and to seduce), the reality is that the gothic novel is steeped in religious puritanism, so these ladies (most of the time) don't usually need to be sexual with their love interest/victim to get their attention. They usually only need a single glance.

If you think I'm exaggerating:

Never gaze upon a woman, and walk abroad only with eyes ever fixed upon the ground; for however chaste and watchful one may be, the error of a single moment is enough to make one lose eternity. 

The dead women in love, Théophile Gautier

Another thing is that these supernatural brides are usually here at just the right time to skillfully grope the weaknesses of their beloved lover and victim: Are you a feisty guy who thinks he's not afraid of anything? Well, the spirit of the water that will end up bewitching you dwells in a mysterious fountain that no one dares to visit out of fear (Ojos Verdes, Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer ESP/ENG), Have you just obtained eternal life by making a pact with the devil but are a little terrified of what might await you in the solitude of immortality? The beautiful young girl just revived by your own hand has opened her eyes and both you and she know in this one look that you will spend eternity together (The Skeleton Count, or The Vampire Mistress, Elizabeth Caroline Grey), Have you just moved here from Naples and are feeling incredibly lonely? Well, it turns out you have a beautiful neighbor who also seems interested in you. By the way, she's practically a poisonous plant (Rappaccini's Daughter, Nathaniel Hawthorne).

Examples like these are plentiful and most end in three ways for the victim of their affections:

Death.

Madness.

Or eternal mourning for having lost her despite having been a victim of deceit or manipulation.

In Lenore's case, her “supernatural bride” appears after the incident in which she rips the wallpaper off the wall: if flowers symbolize feeling alive, she doesn't need them. There is no need for flowers because she is irreversibly withering away.

And when all seems lost, she receives a visitor.

Annabel is a ghost in Lenore's life. The fuzzy silhouette that represents the one thing that made her happy during her confinement, her last glimmer of sanity in a situation where she could no longer hold on without breaking. A specter whose shadow Lenore has been obsessively chasing since a previous life. And every time she manages to reach her, something snatches her away: Annabel goes back to a place where Lenore cannot reach her with her hands.

This is the sad fate of supernatural bride lovers. Because for the gothic novel, when love transcends death it is not a reason to rejoice: the character's life has been permanently disrupted and all that remains is a feeling that is beyond reason. Love becomes the cruelest and most terrible of punishments.

Carmilla

If you're still here with me and you haven't read Carmilla yet, I highly recommend that you do because if you like goth lesbians, this is exactly your shit.

But just so we're on the same page: Carmilla is a short vampire novel published in 1872 by Sheridan Le Fanu in his collection In a Glass Darkly. The plot is about Laura, a young woman who lives in a proper gothic castle located in Austria and her life will be disrupted with the arrival of a beautiful young woman her age named Carmilla.

Both Lenore and Laura live in almost complete isolation barely accompanied by maids (And, in Laura's case, her father) in a huge estate that is surrounded by an appropriately dense and slightly terrifying forest. Now, the reason they are both here is different: where Lenore is locked up against her will, Laura simply lives in a place that is difficult to access.

But let's make a slightly insidious reading here.

One of the first things we know about Laura is that the maids she lives with, despite being fond of her, consider her “a bit touched in the head” and the incident where Carmilla enters the room when Laura is a little girl is completely dismissed for this reason.

Laura is 19 years old when all this happens and at no point in the play is it mentioned that she has any suitors or intentions of getting married, a bit strange for the time in which it occurs. One would assume that the reason for keeping her so isolated is precisely that Laura's father doesn't think his daughter is particularly sane in the head.

As does Lenore.

Add to that the fact that they are both grieving. Lenore for Theo's death and, in Laura's case, for learning that the daughter of a dear friend of her father's has died in strange circumstances and, although she did not get to know her, this fact affected her a lot.

Anyway, sooner rather than later this almost supernaturally beautiful young lady of her own age shows up and kicks in the door saying she wants to be friends. Carmilla through a carriage “accident” near the property and Annabel requesting a meeting to get to know her.

In both cases, the dynamic established is the same.

On the one hand, we have a young lady who looks completely ecstatic at this pompous and definitely somewhat deranged creature. Laura spares no words in explaining to the reader how fucking beautiful Carmilla is, how important she is to her and how much she loves her. And Lenore, well, Lenore does this:

On the other side, the supernatural (girl)friend returns her affection with the subtlety of a kick in the teeth:

Annabel is a little more subtle than Carmilla was before she and Lenore were a thing, but we still see her get super physically close (something she doesn't usually do with other characters in Nevermore, so this is something she only does with Lenore).

Fun fact: that gesture with the fan means “I'm shy, but I'm interested.”

Unfortunately for our comphet-filled protagonist (because she watches THIS and still thinks they're “good friends”) her days in the company of this girl end in tragedy. Carmilla is eventually unveiled as a vampire and killed, while Lenore sees Annabel leave and, taking into account that they are both in Nevermore, subsequently sees her die.

In both cases, the protagonist's life has been scarred by her supernatural (girl)friend: neither a year-long trip abroad nor a new group of friends can take Laura or Lenore away from the memory of those happy days that are now irretrievably tainted.

Conclusions

I think one thing that has happened to me writing this now that I seriously pulled the rug out from under me regarding the amount of references in this comic and it has been non-stop bullshit. They're all still framed within the genres of tragedy and gothic novel, but even with this essay I've fallen short on some topics.

I don't know when I'll continue with this saga because it really involves going through an awful lot of material, but I can at least say one thing for sure: the amount of detail it has is, honestly, quite impressive.

[songofamazon]

Thanks for another great prompt! Vel's worst day ever: Tearstone Island. This came to me as fanfic snippets, which took a little longer than usual, so buckle up.

~~~

Vel bit her lip and tightened her grip on her staff. Whatever Strife said, she was a good enough Veil Jumper to tell that the doorway ahead of them was complexly--and dangerously warded. And yet, shrouded in the sickening red light of El'garnan's unnatural eclipse--every moment of it reminding her what, and who, they were up against--Bellara and Neve argued over who should have the honor of dismantling the wards.

"Oh, you won't need to command them to their deaths. They will volunteer."

Vel shivered.

The answer was obvious, though.

Vel turned back to them. Behind Neve and Bellara, Lucanis shrugged helplessly, as if to say, 'You know how they are.'

"Bellara, there is no one better at untangling ancient Elven wards than you," Vel stepped closer to them, "No offense, Neve."

"None taken. You're right."

Taking both of Bellara's hands in hers, Vel met her deep brown eyes, ringed by Vallaslin kin to her own, "I know you can do this, Bellara. You know it too. You really are the best."

Bellara rolled her eyes. "That's what I've been saying."

Neve cupped a protective hand on Bellara's shoulder. "You've got this Bel."

"I do. Trust me." Bellara shrugged free of them both. "But, you should all probably stay back, and be ready. This has at least six layers of protective enchantments, some threads of alarms, and something else that I don't really like the feel of."

"I know," Vel shuddered. Blight. So much Blight.

And then Bellara set to work.

Vel didn't so much watch Bellara work, as she felt it. The sensed the elegant untangling and brittle balancing of magic that Bellara was so good at.

The ward flickered and fell. Bellara was incredible.

And then Bellara was shrieking, pulled off by a Blight tendril.

"Bellara!" Vel screamed. Reaching, casting, grasping--anything for her.

Through an Eluvian and then clatter, smash--she was gone.

"No!" Vel screamed, rushing to the shattered mirror frame, past an utterly frozen, horrified Neve, "Bellara!" She pounded at the Eluvian remains. Shards pricked at her fists, but Vel didn't care. "Give her back! Ghiln'nain you fucking coward, give her back!"

Soppy sobs and blurry eyes. Her best friend--gone. Just, gone. Numb hate. The gods, her fucking gods did this. All of this.

Warm, leathered arms wrapped around her from behind. "Vel..." Lucanis' warm breath caressed her ear. What could he possibly say that would make this better?

Leaning limply back into his warmth, Vel let the hot tears slide down her face, punctuated by ugly sniffles. But he never backed away. Assan slid up to them, twining his soft and feathery body around them both.

I love you, Lucanis. I love you so much. Don't you die on me too.

But she couldn't say it any more than he could.

Imacculate footsteps on stone. "Lucanis, if I may?" Professor Volkarian, then.

Lucanis huffed agreement, then backed away, passing her into Emmerich's strong, yet gentle grasp. Taking her shoulders, Lucanis turned her around to face him. "Rook, there is a chance that Bellara yet lives," he said.

It was enough to snap her attention up to his face, craning her neck upwards. "What?"

"I did not sense her death before she was pulled through the mirror," he said with the same methodical fact-finding she found strangely comforting, "While I don't want to give you false hope of what happens after, we may yet save her. And regardless, Bellara would want us to press on. As you said before, this is our only chance before the blighted gods finish their ritual."

Vel hung her head. "You're right. I'm sorry." She shiffed.

"Don't apologize," Taash was at her side, all strength and fire. "Not for this. We're going to get her back and end those bastards."

Vel brushed her fingertips against the daggar at her hips. The lyrium sang.

"Yes. We will," she turned to face the rest of her team, "So let's get moving!"

~~~

It was hard. The Blight was utterly overwhelming.

Just so much Blight.

But none of Vel's companions wavered, so neither did she.

And then there was Ghilan'nain. She was the heart of the Blight.

Harding took Emmerich, Neve, Davrin, and Assan around for a surprise flanking--if Ghilan'nain could even be surprised--and Vel led the rest of the team for a direct offensive.

"This ends here," she told them.

"This time, I won't miss," Lucanis promised with all the gravity of a professional, the best mage killer (and God killer, she hoped) in Thedas.

And a man with whom so much was left unsaid.

I love you, Lucanis, and when this is over...

"And we won't let you down," Harding promised. "We'll do whatever it takes!"

"Whatever it takes," Vel echoed. She felt as unnatural in her own skin as the blight crawling up the ancient Elvhen ruins. This wasn't what Varric recruited her for. None of this was. But it was what she had to do.

And then it went all wrong.

Blight snatched and encased her entire team, leaving Vel to fight the goddess of monsters and her endless hordes of Darkspawn alone.

Vel screamed for her friends, praying to who-knows-what (not the Evanuris, that was for sure) that they were alive and untainted. She threw fire from her staff in all directions, wailing in terror, until there was little magic left in her.

But one by one, she found and freed them: Taash and Lucanis. With each a ragged sigh of relief that couldn't be resolved until Ghilan'nain was dead.

And then the moment came.

A flash of understanding passed between her and Lucanis: a gaze and a nod across the blighted battlefield.

Vel flung him the dagger, and on Spite's spectral wings, Lucanis caught it, soaring towards Ghilan'nain.

But a her Blight tendril snagged him. Spite's wings sputtered away as Ghilan'nain squeezed the life from him like a python and pinned the dagger to his side.

Vel dove for him, but another tendril caught her. Judging by Taash's roars of rage, they were pinned down too.

It can't end like this. We're all the world has left. It can't.

And then Harding--brave, stalwart Harding--struggled up a broken pillar behind Ghilan'nain while the goddess was too busy pontificating on her imminent victory to notice.

Arrow after arrow pierced Ghilan'nain's neck and side. She screeched and turned.

More arrows.

Taash cheered, spitting flame into the chaos.

The tendrils' grip on them loosened.

And then, like a spear, Ghilan'nain threw a sharpened tendril at Harding. She was too close to miss. It pierced past her armor and through her chest.

"Lace!" Taash shrieked, tearing free.

Ghilan'nain laughed maniacally.

Wheezing, Harding didn't lower her bow, "Whatever it takes." Even as the blood soaked her surcoat, she fired shot after point-blank shot into Ghilan'nain's face.

Suddenly Lucanis was free and flying towards his target to finish the job.

Just as Ghilan'nain pierced Harding's abdomen and threw her aside, tumbling into an abyssal fissure of Blight.

"Harding!" Vel cast out with her magic to catch her, but she was too slow.

"Lace!" Taash wailed again.

Ghilan'nain scream shattered whatever focus Vel had left.

Vel watched, too paralyzed to help, heart in her throat, as Lucanis and Spite wrestled with Ghilan'nain, stabbing her writhing torso again and again, until her screams became a withering sigh, and they toppled to the ground.

The lyrium dagger flashed and tumbled from Lucanis' fingers as he hit the ground.

"Lucanis! No!" But her voice was lost in the rushing white blaze of the dagger. Its invisible force shoved her down and away.

Not now! Not when there is still one god left to kill!

"Get it!" Taash yelled, their voice somehow carrying over the shrieking song of the dagger, "Make it stop!"

So she crawled, fingers grasping at seams in stone to pull herself towards it, inch by inch.

And then she had it. Overwhelming magic washed over her.

Voices. Unnamed songs. Whispers. The roar of lyrium.

Lucanis lay limply beside her on the stone.

"Lucanis!" she cried, reaching for him.

Or was it Varric?

Why was Varric here?

Vel blinked, forcing herself to her knees.

Not Varric. Lucanis.

Lifeless Lucanis.

Blood, lyrium, and Fade whispers roared in her ears, humming against her skin, enveloping her.

And amid it all was Solas.

But it wasn't the wise Solas who, against her better judgement, came to mentor her in this battle against the Evanuris.

It wasn't the gentle Solas who loved her cousin Elanna from across the distance of a decade, the Solas Elanna still loved.

No, this was the prideful god of lies that Vel had been warned of her whole life.

Here to pry the lyrium dagger from her stunned fingers, here to trap her in the Fade in his place.

"I am afraid this was necessary, Rook."

But his words slipped over her consciousness.

Bellara. Lace. Lucanis.

Necessary? And for what?

"Because you, a mortal, could never have faced Elgar'nan and won."

Vel's awareness slipped again, and all the roaring magic snapped to silence.

All that remained were the Fade-eerie echoes of Vel's screaming sobs and the heavy, useless pounding of her fists against the Fade-stone beneath her.

Heyo, it’s Friday again!

It’s the Rook Introduction Hour! ✨🎉🎊🥳

How it works: I ask you a question about your Rook(s) and you answer it with as much brevity or verbosity as you desire. You can do this whenever you want, and I���ll reblog it + add some comments! There’s no time limit— if you want to do the older ones, they are collected here! (The post is updated on Fridays!)

Today’s Question(s): What is the worst thing that’s ever happened to your Rook? Was it during the course of DATV, or before that? What impact did it have on their life? How did it change them as a person? If their decisions had a part in creating the situation, do they regret it?

Thanks for sharing !

[rocketbirdie]

face value

[deoidesign]

One of my first digital pieces (2010) versus one of my recent ones (2024)

We all start somewhere!

[xxplastic-cubexx]

sequel to this ramble cause the way james talks bout the reduced cherik scenes throughout the xmen films in this video is making me want to kill people. 'we'll always have paris darling' what if we all blew up.

[moonstarfirelighting]

Okay couple extra ideas to add on to that

Of course, Jason is atrocious at cooking and could burn water was Leo can make a decent meal out of pretty much anything

Yes they do use each other as regulation techniques. It is so cute when they do

I believe Leo has like a resting body temperature of around 42°. Celsius so his fevers would probably sit around like 43 to 44° meaning he cannot go to the doctors like point blank because if they check his temperature, how do you explain without explaining your demigod no, it's absolutely normal that I am fucking at a temperature of 42°. That is my resting body temperature. If I was colder I would be concerned

Leo is incapable of resting whether he is ill or injured. If you assign him to bed rest you can guarantee he's pulling out of his tool belt and licking a fake version of him to lay in bed so we can go back to work

Jason is much the same in refusing to rest but he's not quite inventive enough to be able to make a replica of him to lay in bed for him whilst he is ill so he gets caught more than Leo does

And some of my own head canons to add on top

This one does involve the canon deaths but I have changed some things. So essentially when Leo died he didn't go over to calypso. I have changed that. He just went flying off to this. A little stretch of coast and land crash landed fully dead. Jason was currently being held down by Hazel's golden shackles so he would get caught in the explosion and die cuz and Piper's mouth was being covered by Frank cuz he did not want to be child speak out of it or dragged down by Jason. So then as soon as he saw the explosion clear and Leo's body falling he immediately broke out of said gold shackles and chased Leo down and in the upset over Leo being dead he managed to somehow conduct electricity at about I'd say 50,000 volts Greek fire on impact with the ground and he conducted that through Leo's body and through Leo's soul into the underworld. Essentially threatening Santa Claus and Hades enough to return Leo to the mortal world which will have repercussions

And when Jason died in burning maze, Leo turned up just after to then grab Nico by the collar demand his Shadow travel him into the underworld which Nico does comply with because Leo, other hand contains a massive Greek fire just next to his face and Nico doesn't feel like dying today And so Leo then proceeds to directly threaten Hades Persephone and Thanatos into returning Jason's soul to his body or he would return them to chaos again. This has repercussions and you cannot just revive someone really hazel is a weird situation which I'm kind of ignoring for this

But then of course, the repercussions of reviving someone ignoring the hazel situation. You can't really do that. So the only way to do that is to put them on track to ascend to godhood. So you now have both Leo and Jason in the process of Ascension. Leo is further ahead than Jason because he died and then got revived first and it is expediated by power usage so he's about. I'd say ahead in the Ascension process like further along by about a month and we're going off of Abby from tiktoks Ascension rules where essentially they need to be sequestered so they don't murder people when they have the explosive reaction to ascending And so they just sort of settle to go up off and hang out in hephaestus's forges cuz Jason does not like his father. So he just hangs out with festus and Leo to ascend more safely. Little did they know that quite simply the rest of the seven and Nico and will are also on the track to Ascension through shit worship and other things like that course. It goes Percy then annabeth and Nico and will and next off on that track because well they're impressive for making it out of Tatarus alive. Especially Nico for doing it twice And then that is followed by Piper and Frank and hazel

And respectively, they are the gods of poisons and pollution for person and a birth is the goddess of I would imagine look at least partially on architecture I can't think of other things for her, but she'd probably have other things under her domain. Leo and Jason well. Jason has power over wins and electronic Fields of sorts so he can short-circuit an entire city if he wants after he's fully ascended and Leo is a god of at mechanics and he's got strong ties to fire in godhood Will has medical protection and battle medicine. So if you're in the middle of a war and you get an injury, pray to will and you've got a better chance Nico as his moniker of the ghost king States he's a god of ghosts and the dead. So his father is king of the underworld and he rules the underworld and data tells his god of death. But he is God of the dead themselves Piper is essentially a goddess of mind control mental manipulation so she has powers. It's basically super-sized charm speak but a lot lot stronger and that's her domain Frank, well, I don't know enough about Frank to come up with a domain for him. I don't really know that much about hazel either, so feel free to come up with stuff of those

Some random domestic valgrace headcanons just bc I’m bored and thinking about it

- LEO is the one who handles the finances. Because it’s Leo “knew college math at age 8” Valdez vs Jason “probably has dyscalculia and raised by wolves” Grace. Jason does remind him of when the finances are due, though.

- Leo also cooks most of the time and fixes house things.

- Jason cleans and does laundry. He also plans things, like if they want to do a house party or go on a vacation or something.

- They have a strict “no open flames” rule for their house. Despite having a handle on his powers at that point, Leo still hates the idea of an accidental fire. (Especially remembering that Leo can’t control just any fire around him, it’s only his powers and they can get out of control once they’re out of his hands). So they use air fresheners instead of candles, no gas stoves, etc. for birthdays they will light candles on the cake but only for the few seconds it takes to sing and blow them out.

*Leo works with metal/fire at work and in other less flammable spaces, it’s specifically their house that he doesn’t want fire*

- Jason tries learning Spanish. He’s kinda horrible at it, but Leo loves him for it. And Jason LOVES when Leo speaks Spanish

- When Leo’s overwhelmed, he hugs Jason and Jason holds him back and just starts floating in the air. Somehow the combined sensation of being hugged and being somewhat weightless is really calming for Leo (and of course hugging Jason).

- On the flip side, when Jason’s overwhelmed he flops onto Leo for warmth. Leo will be working on something, sitting in the garage, and Jason will press his back against Leo’s just to feel the warmth and presence. After a moment Leo will turn and ask “tough day?”

- The first time Leo got sick Jason almost died of worry bc Leo’s fevers run hotter than a normal human’s. It took like an hour of Leo reassuring him that his level of “normal” for fevers is different bc his usual body temp is different.

- Jason always tries to hide when he’s sick, literally and emotionally. He’ll try to cover sneezes and coughs, and when that’s not enough he hides in his room.

- Jason is able to cut through Leo’s bull when he’s using humor to deflect and push people away. Jason pulls him aside in private and manages to push through the defenses Leo puts up. This trust takes forever to build, though.

- And Leo is able to see when Jason is avoiding confrontation or is uncomfortable with someone and can jump in for him if needed. Jason was taught to handle things “professionally” but sometimes this turns into “way too politely jumping around the fact that a person is out of their lane”. Leo has no qualms about social professionalism and will break things off if it goes on too long. He then talks to Jason and makes sure the situation didnt go too far in any way.

[mantisgodsdomain]

We think the very unintended manner in which we are experiencing BG3 (datamining the game and then reading all of the dialogue by manually going through the game files and reading the text) may be altering our impressions of the game slightly. If we ever release most of this shit we are probably going to need to stick a "disclaimer: author of this fanfiction mostly experienced this game via datamining, and may not be an accurate source on things like maps, because the wizard's computer cannot run BG3" on there. Unrelatedly, if any of you Tumblr users out there who are capable of running BG3 happen to be willing to hop on call with us and do nothing but take a freecam around the scenery for a while, we're open.

[ravencromwell]

The poem evokes human greatness and human vulnerability. People are “godlike” in their courage and skill, but even the greatest mortals fall and clutch the dust between their bloody fingers. The beautiful word minunthadios , “short-lived,” is used of both Achilles and Hector, and applies to all of us. We die too soon, and there is no adequate recompense for the terrible, inevitable loss of life. Yet through poetry, the words, actions, and feelings of some long-ago brief lives may be remembered even three thousand years later.

--Emily Wilson's introduction to the Iliad

[comradesummers]

watching some of the opera adaptations of the orpheus and eurydice story for a paper, and can i just say, giving it a happy ending is for cowards only. this is opera for god's sake! how are you not committing to the angst? christoph willibald gluck this is a callout post

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also "textless" versions of these, wahooo

[vaguely-concerned]

I've been trying to figure out a dynamic between neve and rye that I find more compelling, because right now there's not much of anything there for me to sink my little teeth into. but I think I've landed on something delicious with the idea that especially after minrathous gets fucked, rye looks at neve and sees myrna -- someone he feels he keeps letting down horribly no matter how hard he tries not to and can't quite achieve the approval of/connection with that he wishes so it's better to just pull away completely and disengage rather than stay in that unshifting shame. neve is (very understandably) measured and distant with him after what happened, and he's flashing back to his student days of myrna gazing at the perpetually hungover heartbroken heap of a person of him on the other side of her desk every time he missed the deadline of a paper or project like '...can we at least both agree that this is. a bit disappointing. especially considering your potential.' (and him all smudged black eyeshadow and numb ruefulness being like 'sure that's a very kind way to put it myrna thank you'.)

aside from the 'if I let him get too deeply into this he'll go the way of brom and it'll be all my fault (again)' element, neve thinks rye is dismissing her and her city/being a bit callous in the same way he was after varric's death (listen. how fucking wild must rook's reaction to losing a beloved mentor seem to the rest of the crew who aren't seeing the blood magic paper doll ghost varric the whole time, especially those who got to see them interact. you WOULD think 'there's something wrong with this guy. putting the job first is one thing just not seeming to react at all is another this is fucking freaky', wouldn't you, especially after seeing the warmth in that dynamic in action beforehand.) perfect storm of two people who grit their teeth and turn inwards in pain deciding that not talking about it is their best bet (NEWSFLASH: IT ISN'T) lmao

(rye spent his last year of watcher training on a mostly joyless bender and then got it together enough to finish the eternal orb project last moment in a fevered near-sleepless week instead of the half a year that was intended. emmrich is both astounded and distressed to hear this. "a week? but -- but that is an astounding accomplishment rook!! and also why in the maker's good light would you ever do that to yourself?" ("well you see there was no one to stop me from doing it like that but me. and under those conditions these things tend to happen".) rye was working through/looking up stuff around transitioning and doing every kind of OTHER high level watcher research through that whole time, but ultimately he's an excellent watcher and a terrible student, at least under traditional methods. adhd from here to the fucking moon. touched by something akin to divine inspiration in moments of high tension that pulls all the threads into one coherent unbreakable cord, a bit of a frayed mess in most other settings. in our world he'd be dropping out of a masters program at the very last hurdle in this moment maker bless and protect him)

[roaringroa]

they should make a life where you don't have appointments, work, school and scheduled events every single day for months on end