#ANNA WHY IS THIS OUR REALITY NOW

[covid-safer-hotties]

To My Unmasked Friend in the Fifth Year of COVID - By: Anna Holmes - Published Aug 17, 2024

I’m going to be honest with you, because I love you, and you deserve nothing but honesty. I’m going to try really hard not to be angry while I do it, but it’s probably going to slip out every now and again. But I need you to hear me out, all right?

By now, we’ve talked about my reality. My personal struggle with long COVID, the isolation I live in, why I am so angry all the time.

But let’s talk about you. You just went to a big convention overseas. You got on a plane, got a little gussied up, talked shop with some insiders, geeked out over awards and merch, ate, drank, were merry, left with your social cup and your heart full.

You’re a good person. We wouldn’t be friends otherwise! You’d never dream of tripping a person with a red and white cane, using the r-word, excluding a disabled person from an event because of something they can’t help.

You might even acknowledge that the COVID response from governments and organizations has been ableist and inadequate.

But you didn’t wear a mask.

For whatever reason — you wanted to show off your makeup, it makes you itchy, you believed the messaging that COVID is endemic (what does that actually mean?), you just don’t think about it anymore — you made a choice that actively excludes people like me from participating not only in an event like a convention, but society at large. And yes, it is a choice. Every time you step out into the world without a mask on your face, you have made a decision that your very good reason, whatever it is, supersedes the right of disabled and at-risk people to exist safely in your orbit.

Well, hold on, you say. It’s not any one individual’s fault, it’s the inadequate public health messaging. Isn’t that what you’ve been saying?

And I have. In the past, I have talked about how it is unconscionable that health authorities have thrown their hands up and rescinded guidance that would have saved hundreds of thousands of lives and prolonged a pandemic that, to hear them tell it, has been bested. It hasn’t. Worst of all, the financial motivation that we all know is driving this premature victory lap isn’t even being fulfilled. Long COVID and other post-COVID complications are costing the global economy one trillion a year. Meanwhile, article after article handwrings about nobody wanting to work anymore, about the sagging college application scene, about declines in military enlistment, and the strain on our healthcare systems.

All of this is very much the fault of our leaders, who have decided the political ramifications of “normalcy” are more important than the health and lives of the 400 million people living with long COVID across the globe, the immunocompromised folks who are increasingly being shut out of every conceivable public space, and the disabled community which has been screaming into the wind about our marginalization since before the virus even hit US soil.

But I want to be very clear. You are helping them do this.

The reality is that we have been living in this deeply flawed landscape of “personal choice”, and you’ve made yours. You’ve opted not to look into how densely clustered cases are. You’ve stopped listening to your friends who have informed themselves. You’ve given yourself permission to put COVID on the back burner. You’ve earned it, right? Four and a half years of trauma?

COVID doesn’t care if you’re tired of being scared or careful or considerate. COVID is not something you can personally overcome by being smart or virtuous or brave. It is a virus which only seeks to infect and replicate, and it is getting very good at those things. While you’ve looked away, my community has been scrambling to avoid variants that skirt immunity and don’t show up on rapid tests until day five-seven. The constant battle has changed since you were last in it. It’s not sufficient anymore to get your shots and test before a big event. You could well be asymptomatic and infectious, or have symptoms and convinced yourself it can’t be COVID because that second line hasn’t popped up.

You have come to the conclusion sometime between 2022 and now that you just have to decide what level of risk you’re comfortable with and live with it. The problem with that is scale. It’s you and everybody else doing that, and a lot of people have decided they are comfortable with a high level of risk. Despite what you’ve been told, you’re not just making that decision for yourself. You are making it for every person you come in contact with.

Think back to the early tense days of 2020. We were told to select a “bubble.” Those people would be our social lifelines, and through those, we could control our exposure.

My bubble is quite small. It includes my husband, my sister, and two friends I see relatively frequently.

My husband goes to work via the bus, and to the grocery store. Every person he comes in contact with there has the potential to infect him, and then he has the potential to pass it along to me. He mitigates this by wearing a well-fitted respirator at all times.

My sister goes to work at a busy public place. She masks when public facing and takes it off in the back office. She goes to restaurants, bars, concerts, hangs out with friends and her own partner unmasked. About 75% of her interactions have the heightened potential to infect her, which she might then bring into my house when she visits me.

My friends do not mask anywhere except my house when asked. They attend concerts, shows, cons, bars.

Obviously, I am in control of whether I wear a mask around these people. And as we approach one million new cases a day, I will be around everyone but my husband. But science is clear: reciprocal masking is more effective at infection control than a single person masking — especially when that single person is trying to protect themselves, not others.

This is settled science. We’ve known this since 2020. It says clearly that the choice you make is not personal- it has implications for everyone you come in contact with.

And being clear — if I could, I’d make everyone wear a mask for their own health. I don’t want people suffering with what I have. But you’ve been told this lie that you can take your risks for yourself, so you feel comfortable going out without a mask. You’ve been told this lie that it’s possible to completely recover from a COVID infection, so you assume that even if you do catch it, that’s what’ll happen to you, despite evidence showing that every body is indelibly changed by an infection, and that risk only grows with each subsequent infection.

And the greatest lie of all — that only the sick or elderly have anything to fear from COVID — has given you unfounded confidence in your own “good” genes or immune system or fitness. You can get long COVID even if you’re in peak form — in fact, may even be more likely to be hit hard.

So you have decided, individually and collectively, that only the sick or elderly should have to take precautions, and you freewheel through life, only to get surprised and dismayed when you bump into COVID in the wild. It’s back, people declare every summer or winter, as though it ever left.

But I want you to really think about the implications of your choice. Besides yourself. Because let’s be honest here, that’s who you’ve been thinking about, right? Your risk. Your comfort. Never mind your bubble, never mind the bubble of everyone you come into contact with, never mind the people like me who are literally hiding from people like you.

You’re not masking at the doctor’s office. You’re not masking at the airport. You’re not masking at the giant superspreader you just attended, and you’re not masking in the bars and restaurants where we know the virus flourishes. And then you’re bringing that exposure back to your family and friends. Back to the grocery store, where you run across people like my husband, shopping for someone who is unsafe to leave the house, or your elderly neighbors, or an immunocompromised employee.

You’re a good person, or you like to think of yourself that way. That’s why when you’re asked to mask, you dismiss it out of hand — because that changed behavior implies that you’ve been doing something wrong.

And my friend, I’m telling this because I love you: you have been. You might have been doing that on faulty information, but be honest with yourself and with me — you’ve heard me begging people to take this seriously. You’ve seen the information I’ve been sharing. You have had the opportunity to seek out the correct information all along, and you have chosen not to.

It isn’t too late to change your view of the risk you’re imposing on the people around you. It’s not too late to push public health to become more effective. It’s not too late to act in solidarity and be the inclusive person you think you are. It’s not too late to take care of yourself.

Ultimately, that’s what I have been screaming myself hoarse about. I don’t want you to end up with what I have. I don’t want you to inadvertently impose that on someone else. And yes, I’ve been angry, because you’ve been advertising your absolute lack of concern with group shots of your naked faces on social media. It doesn’t seem to bother you that I am stuck at home like it’s 2020, except for doctors’ appointments that I literally have to risk my life to go to. You’ve told yourself that it’s not your problem, because only the sick and elderly have to take precautions.

You know better. You can do better. For your community, yourself, and me, do better.

Please. I love you.

Anna

PS. If you’re feeling upset and embarrassed right now, the best thing you can do is take action. Get yourself good masks (the surgicals and cloth ones don’t cut it anymore), donate to mask blocs so others can access good masks, write to your representatives and the President, comment on upcoming CDC guidance, schedule yourself a booster, and talk to your loved ones about doing better, too. The only way we get out of this is with community care. So care.

[flnpushy]

Classic Story...

all birth stories

My old Story: Anna's Birth Struggle Anna had recently graduated and was college bound. Being 18 was fun for Anna and she enjoyed the graduated life. Her boyfriend Tom was also looking forward to college as well, but the two would be separated as they had been accepted to different schools. On the final night before moving away for school, they spent the evening together. Alone. Three months had gone by since the two had been together. Things were going well for him, but no so well for Anna. She was sick most mornings, and just felt off. A couple more weeks went by before she finally called her mom. She told her about her morning sickness and other symptoms. Her mom asked if she had taken a pregnancy test. To that she answered “Are you nuts?” “I’m not pregnant.” A few more days passed, she finally gave in and took a test. The test said she was indeed pregnant. She didn’t believe it so she took another. Same result. She called her mom in disbelief. “Mom I’m Pregnant.” Anna said. “OH my goodness....” Her mother replied. “What about school?” She asked Anna. “I don’t know mom, I don’t know what to do.” Regardless her mom was actually very excited, but Anna was far from excited. She had waited years to go to college and now it was all at risk. She visited the doctor where they confirmed she was about three months along. Much to far to go back now. Anna Couldn’t believe it. A baby? She didn’t want to have a baby! She then had to let Tom know. She didn’t know how he would react. She was very nervous making that call. “Tom, Its me, Your going to be a dad.” Anna said. There was a brief silence on the line.... “Oh my god are you serious?!?” He said excitedly. “Are you mad.” Anna asked. “Of course I’m not mad, Im absolutely ecstatic.” “Why would I be mad Anna, Its my fault your pregnant!” He said. “Oh thank god your happy.” Anna said. “What about our schooling?” “Its ok Anna, we will make it happen no matter what, I’m here for you!” Tom said. Most days Anna had morning sickness and other issues. Pregnancy was not easy for her. Anna was a petite brunette. She was small overall. She has a small frame, tiny arms, and she was only 5 foot 2. She was still just a girl in reality, but she now was going to become a woman faster then she had ever imagined. She continued her studies as best she could. Eventually the ninth month had arrived. Annas belly was like a basketball protruding from her body. Anna knew she would birth at home as this was her wish. Her mom Mary had been preparing thier home for months. Everything Mary could afford to get she got in preparation for the birth. Finally summer break arrived and a very pregnant Anna returned to her home, and Tom did to. One morning Anna awoke early to pains in her belly. This wasnt unusual for her as the baby frequently moved around in her belly causing discomfort. These pains were different however. She felt around the top of her belly. She could feel a little baby foot squirming around within her. Anna was grossed out by the babies movements, she didnt like the idea that a baby was inside her. She was ready to be done, ready to give birth and be back to being a normal girl again. Anna prepared a breakfast and joined her boyfriend Tom on the front porch for a Saturday morning conversation. Tom asked how Anna was doing and knew that she was in some type of pain. “I think it may be happening.” Anna said “Ok honey, lets get things ready.” Tom replied. Tom prepared her bed with clean sheets and comfortable pillows. He also layed out towels in the bathoom and on the bed to catch fluids during the birthing process. A couple hours later Anna was in real pain, labor had begun and her belly squirmed wildly as the baby moved toward the birth canal. The contractions were sharper and shaper and it wasnt long before Anna was really hurting. She layed sprawled out on the couch, trying her hardest to bear

through each contraction. She was wearing a light shirt, bra, and panties. She fought the pain as best she could, but still yelped in pain with each contraction. Tom had read up on birth and was going to school to be a doctor. He figured this would be a good training opportunity.

“My poor baby girl.” Tom said, sitting beside her. Anna continued to struggle through the pain. Anna entered transition, this was the worst pain she had ever faced. “Oh my god, oh oh oh, help me, ahhhhhhh” Anna yelped. She continued her struggle. Till finally transition had ended. The baby was now low in her belly and engaged in her pelvis. “Ok its time to check your cervix to see if you can push.” Tom said Anna sat upon the bed and Tom inserted a finger to check Anna. “Good girl Anna, your right on the money, 10 centimeters!” “So now what do I do?” Anna asked. “Time to push that baby out hun!” Tom replied. “Im scared.” Anna said. “I know baby girl, but its so close to being done now.” Tom said. Anna endured another couple of contractions. She was ready to get over to the bed, but the next contraction brought a tiny gush of fluids. “Whats happening!?!” Anna shrieked. “Your water broke baby, The baby is coming now!” Tom replied. Anna and Tom went to the bed, Anna waddled as it was so strange to her having so much pressure between her legs. They arrived at the bedside. Anna took off her shirt, bra, and panties, then climbed into bed. “Wow look at my beautiful baby girl” Tom said. “You are so beautiful.” “Ok how do I do this.” Anna asked. Tom put several pillows behind his pregnant girlfriends head, he put an absorbent pad under her butt as well. “Lift your butt baby.” Tom said as she slid the pad underneath. “Ok now we wait for a contraction and you push.” Tom said. “I will teach you how to push.” Tom stated. Tom put a finger in her opening. “Feel my finger?” Tom asked. “Yes.” Anna replied. “Ok when a contraction comes, your push like your having a bowel movement right at this spot.” He said “Ok” Anna replied. It was time to put her newly acquired knowledge to the test. A contraction came. “Ok baby, pull your legs up toward your chest and push like your pooping.” Tom instructed. Anna pulled back her little legs and pushed. “Grrrrr.” she grunted out. She then stopped. “Good girl Anna.” Tom said. “Hold those pushes good and long.” Tom stated. Anna pushed again. “mmmmmm grrrrrr ahhhhhh.” She grunted hard. The contraction ended. “Good girl baby!” Tom said. “Now relax.” “How many pushes will I have to do?” Anna asked. “Could be a few minutes, could be a few hours babe.” Tom said. “A FEW HOURS!” Anna yelled. “Yes baby, pushing a baby out is a long process. Your young and small, The baby has to stretch you out to get free.” Tom said. “You will be ok. Just breath and relax.” Another contraction came.

“Ok baby girl, here goes.” Tom said. Anna pulled back her legs and grunted. She pushed good and hard this time, curling her little toes in protest of the pain. “Good push girl! And again!” Tom said. Anna pushed again and again till the contraction was over. “Ok babe, lets see what we can see.” Tom said. Tom used both hands to open her opening. He poked around a bit. ‘“Ok girl, heres a contraction, push hard.” He said Anna pushed with all her strength. “Ohhhh!!! We have something here!” Tom said. “I see something!” Tom said again. “We have a little baby head!” “I wanna see the baby!” Anna said. Tom grabbed a large mirror and placed in in front of her, she then pulled back her opening once more. “Ok push hard and watch the mirror” Tom said. Anna pushed, in the tiny little back of her opening a tiny spot of hair was visible. As the push stopped the spot went away. “Where did my baby go?” Anna asked. “Back in your tummy.” Tom said. “Why in my tummy, I want her out!” Anna stated. “Birth is a two steps forward, one step back process baby. The baby will come out a bit, then go back in a bit, remember she is stretching you out so she can get free.” Tom said. “ I want her out!” Anna said. “Honey, she will come out, you have to push her out. “ Tom said. Anna dropped her legs as the contraction ended. Tom grabbed more pillows as it was a struggle for Anna to push and hold her legs open. He put pillows under Annas legs to support them. Then another contraction came. Anna moaned as she pushed, she struggled and quivered. Her perineum however was starting to bulge a bit with each push. “I’m uncomfortable.” Anna said. “Change positions honey, you have the whole bed.” Tom said. “Try side laying, I’ll support your upper leg when you push.” Anna slowly moved from laying on her back to laying on her side. Her cute little Belly touching the mattress. Another contraction came. Tom supported her upper leg as she began to push again. Anna dug deep and bored down with all her strength, the perineum slowly bulged outward. As the push ended the perineum bulge disappeared. The contraction continued so Anna pushed again. Once again the bulge appeared, and then slowly disappeared as the push ended. “Good girl Anna, your making her move in there!” Tom said. “With every push your helping the baby escape from your womb.” Tom laid down first and let Anna lie down on his lap. He did this to comfort Anna and help her push the baby out. The mirror was positioned so that Anna and Tom could see the progress. Little did Anna know this was just the beginning of the battle. Another round of contractions Hit Anna. Assisted by her boyfriend she began pushing again. Anna drew back her legs and let out a push. She curled her toes as she pushed, her Tummy shook and quivered as she pushed hard to free the baby. Her perineum bulged as she continued to push the baby. The next push brought the bulge out further. It was becoming evident that the baby's head was close to the opening. A few moments later another push came over Anna. She strained and struggled, but her efforts were awarded. She pushed again, the perineum bulged farther this time. Anna continued to struggle, however she was about to be rewarded. As in her vulva, a tiny tuft of hair protruded. “Good Girl baby!” We can see that little Head! Tom said.

As the push came to an end the tuft of hair receded from view. The contraction ended. Anna relaxed in between the waves. Less than a minute later the next contraction started. Tom assisted Anna in drawing her legs back. Anna pushed with all of her strength. The tiny tuft of hair appeared in the opening once more.

“Reach down and touch the baby.” Tom said Anna reached down with her hand, and for the first time touched her baby's head. “Ewww its slippery and gross!” Anna said. Tom just laughed. The next contraction started. Anna Drew back her legs once more and pushed. The baby's head became slightly more visible this time. However as the push ended the baby's head drew back inside of Anna’s tummy. She was so close, but yet so far. When pushing she could see her baby, but the battle was far from over. “Ok baby girl, the next stage is the tricky one. The babies head will fight your perineum to get out. When you push the head will come out, but when you stop it will roll back. The perineum skin will hold the baby inside of you. You must overcome this skin to get the baby out.” Tom instructed. It was time for Anna to dig deep. Her baby's head was stuck in between her legs, and only she could free it. It did not matter how much assistance her boyfriend gave her, it was totally up to her to give birth to the babies head. Anna knew that Tom could not pull the baby from within her. It had to be done on her own. The next contraction came. Anna's Little body strained as she began to push. Below her belly the tiny baby Head was starting to emerge. It seemed so much more fluid in her. The head was more responsive to her pushing now. Even a tiny push had a reaction on the baby. Tom layed behind her and watched the action unfold in the mirror. He was so proud of what his girl was doing, and slightly aroused. Anna pushed again which revealed the baby's head once more, however as she stopped the head receded back in. The battle between baby and skin had begun. Every push moved the head into the opening, but at the end of every push the baby went back inside of Annas tummy. The battle continued. Anna pushed down hard, the baby responded this time, and the head protruded quite far. However with the end of the push the baby went back into her tummy. Anna made tiny moaning sounds as she pushed hard to free her baby. She needed a position change to see if she could push the head free in a different position. Lying on her back was obviously getting her nowhere as the baby continued to go in and out. She once again switched to side lying. Tom supported her upper leg as she pushed. The baby's head came into view then slowly rolled back in as Anna stopped pushing. The little baby head was not coming anytime soon. It's almost as though the baby preferred Annas tiny little Tummy. Anna continued to struggle, but the babies head remained firm in her. It had now been two hours since Anna began pushing. She had made good progress, but the babies head was still within her. The baby had made an appearance several times, but refused to stay in the opening. Anna's Young perineum skin just was not allowing the baby to come forth. Anna was becoming desperate. She wanted the baby out of her badly but no matter how hard she struggled the head would not come free. Still on her side she began to wiggle her tiny hips back-and-forth. “Good girl Anna. Move those hips, it may help her out.” Tom said. “Follow your instincts.” Anna resumed another push. As she wiggled her hips back and forth the baby's head started to make more headway. The tiny tuft of hair head become the top of the babies skull. A tiny teardrop shape was starting to happen. Anna's perineum skin was finally starting to stretch. “Good job baby girl, wiggle that tummy and get that baby out!”Tom said. “Uhh, uhgrrrm, ooh god, mmmmm.” Anna moaned as she pushed. Anna was getting tired And frustrated. It was time for an all out massive push. “Im going for it.” Anna said. “Hold me open.” Anna waited for the next contraction to set in, Tom held her opening below to allow more space for the babies head. Anna breathed in any gathered all of her strength. She dug her feet into the mattress, strained as hard as she possibly could and let out the biggest push she had

ever done. She wiggled from side to side as she pushed. The baby's had came far into the opening. The furthest it had been yet. Even a small portion of the babies forehead was visible. However at the end of her massive push, the babies went back inside the tummy. “Wow honey, I was for sure that would have her out!” Tom said.

“I dont think I can get her out.” Anna stated. “You can honey, I will coach you.” Tom said. Tom began the coaching. He came around from behind her to assist the perineum in opening. “Ok baby, hard push.” Mary said “1 2 3 4 5... “good let go.” Tom continued coaching her for another 15 minutes. The baby's head continued into yo-yo action. Slowly coming visible with the push, and receding back in with the end. Finally after a few more pushes the head was starting to come forth far into crowning. Even though the baby's head was starting to crown, at the end of the push the head was still receding into Anna's tummy. Tom continued to coach his girlfriend, but the head refused to come free. The perineum skin was still fighting to keep the baby inside. No matter how hard Anna pushed the baby continued to recede in at the end. Tom assisted her by pulling back the skin as she pushed. Anna was taking a real working over and Tom knew that she would soon tire to the point of exhaustion. “I cant get her out.” Anna said. “Ive been in the same spot now for 45 minutes and the head is still stuck.” “I know baby girl, you have worked so hard, your perineum is just so tight.” Tom said. The babies head remained in the vulva. Visible, but not able to get free of the perineum. “Help me, I cant get her out.” Anna wailed. Anna began to doubt, she had worked so hard, but with no avail. Tom had doubts as well, seeing his poor girl struggle was starting to make him wonder as well. They took a break for a few minutes and regained composure. “Help, help me.” Anna said. “There is nothing I can do to free the baby honey, you just have to keep going.” Tom said. Anna let out a tiny grunty push. The head moved, but barely. She pushed again. Once again the baby responded, but it was little effort against the tight perineum. The baby receded back into Annas tummy. Once again becoming clenched by the Tight perineum. It was time to take a break and give up for a while, it was becoming apparent that Anna was not going to be able to free the baby. She was simply too tired, and her skin too tight. Anna drew her legs together and the baby disappeared from the Vulva back into her tummy. Anna stood up. It was time to take a break and walk. The walking motion and the movement of her hips might help the baby get into a better position to get free. The baby now back firmly in the tummy made Anna upset. She had carried this baby for the last nine months, and now it was so close to coming out, but yet she was unable to get it out. She could feel the baby moving within her, she could feel it kick and struggle to get free of her tight skin. She began to wonder if the baby would actually fit out of her. Anna endured more contractions as she paced around the bedroom. She could feel the babies head just inside her rubbing the perineum as she walked. It was a strange feeling. After 30 minutes of walking around, it was time for the inevitable. Anna needed to starting pushing again. Anna returned to the bed with Tom at her side. She drew back her legs and began pushing once more. She breathed in and bored down, her skin bulged below. She pushed again, the skin bulged farther and the vulva opened. She pushed again, the head came back to view then slowly receded with the end of the push. The next contraction came. Anna pushed hard and the head came to view, as the push slowed the head went back. Anna was grunting will all her might to free the little baby, but it was stuck. The tiny head held tightly in place. She took a breath. The head slipped slowly back in. “Good girl Anna, it will happen, just stay with it.” Tom said. However after several hours of pushing Tom was starting to get worried she would not be able to get the baby out on her own. Secretly he was turned on by this. Anna kept at it though, pushing hard to get the head moving, then watching it go back inside. She knew she really had no other choice but to get the baby out. The morning turned in to afternoon as Anna continued

to push the baby out. The head had now been going in and out for two long hours. Anna had now been pushing for five total hours. Anna’s body was covered in sweat, and she was becoming very exhausted. “Tom, the baby isn’t coming out.” Anna said. “I’ve been at this for hours.”

“I know babe, but the head is right there in your opening, It will come.” Tom replied. “Yes I know Tom, but her head has been there for two hours!” Anna said. “Are you enjoying seeing me like this?” “No babe of course not, I mean you are quite cute when you push, but I want the baby to come out to.” Tom said. Anna returned to pushing, she grunted hard and long. The babies head was right there at the opening, but just refused to come out any farther. Anna tried and tried again to get the baby out but with no prevail. “Ok Tom, I’m throwing in the towel.” Anna said. “Your baby isn’t coming out.” Anna felt trapped by this. She had a baby stuck in her, she couldn’t get it out, she began to feel anxious. Her anxiety made her tense up. This made the baby retract back inside her. As the baby retracted her tummy got bigger. “Looks like your still pregnant.” Tom said. “Yes, but I’ve been trying to get un-pregnant now for hours!” Anna said. “Why did you have to put such a big baby in me Tom? Anna asked. “I’m not sure its a size issue, I think there is another complication.” Tom replied. Anna went to say something again but was stopped by a contraction. She pushed hard and the head moved out to its farthest yet. The head stayed in the opening for a few seconds before slowly retracting back inside. “See babe, your getting it, that was the farthest its been out yet.” Tom said. “Well ok, I’ll keep trying.” Anna said. Anna pushed again with the next contraction, the head came slowly into view. The babies hair was dry now, it had been in the same spot for so long. Feeling the head going in and out was starting to become natural to Anna. It was actually starting to become slightly pleasureable. She pushed again feeling the head push against her opening. She was becoming aroused. Tom noticed this. “Starting to like it babe?” Tom asked. “Well.... I mean I want it out, but the feeling.....” Anna said. Anna continued to work the baby in and out of her. The head would slowly decend and push her opening, then retract back within her. Anna continued this until she could handle the pleasure no more. Her body shook and quivered with pure sensation. As the sensation overtook her she pushed, her opening contracted in and out. The babies head did the same, however it wasn’t popping out as she thought. The tension of the contractions held the baby tight within her. “Ok Tom thats it, your baby is stuck in me and I want it out now.” Anna said. “Get this baby out of me or else.” “Ok ok, lets see whats going on in there.” Tom replied. Tom reached in Annas opening, he felt around the babies stuck head with his finger. He got around to the bottom of the head and found the problem. “Ok so first of all we have a hand here, and second of all the baby is face up.” Tom said. “Theses two conditions make birth just about impossible.” Tom then withdrew his finger. “I suppose I could pull the hand free making birth much easier.” Tom said as he took a step backwards. “Ok so do it then.” Anna said. “Nah your ok babe, Just keep pushing.” Tom said as he stepped farther away. “Are you nuts Tom!” Anna said. “Your just so cute when you push.” Tom said. “Tom I command you to pull that hand out.” Anna said straining to push. “You’ll get it babe.” Tom said.

“TOM!!” Anna yelled. Tom slowly sat back down at her side. Anna desperately reached down and tried to feel for the babies hand. She could get her fingers just inside, but her belly was to big to be able to reach far enough inside. She gave up and moaned in protest. “Good girl Anna, just keep pushing.” Tom said. “Oh I’m going to get you for this!” Anna said. Anna went to move toward Tom but was hit with another painful contraction. She pulled her legs back and pushed as hard as she could. “Mmmmm Ahhhhhh, COME OUT BABY!” She yelled. She pushed hard again. “OHH MMMM AHHH, COME OUT!” She was gaining traction on the baby, moving its head ever farther out of her opening. However the babies little hand was preventing escape. She pushed hard again, her belly covered in sweat. She could feel the baby kicking and squirming inside to try and get out. Anna put her legs up on the headboard of the bed and continued to push with all her might. She pushed on her belly with her hands to help the baby. But it wasn’t moving. The baby was stuck just prior to full crown. The forehead was visible, but the face had yet to come. “TOM!” Anna said. “Good effort babe, But your still pregnant.” Tom said. “Make you a deal.” Tom said. “Ok what.” Anna said. “If I can impregnate you again in the future, I’ll pull that hand free.” Tom said. “NO, I don’t want another one of your babies inside me!” Anna said. “Ok keep pushing then.” Tom said. “Quick tip, wiggle your hips.” Anna stood up and got on all fours. Then went into a squat. She pushed and wiggled her hips as much as she could. The babies head began to come forward. She pushed harder and harder, the head began to finally stay down. With the next push the face came forth. It retracted a bit with the end of the push. The next push was a struggle but the baby was moving. “AHHHH MMMM.” Anna grunted as she pushed. The head was coming slowly out. The babies ears started to show. The end of the push had the ears disappear back in, to Toms pleasure. “Good Girl Anna, just keep pushing.” Tom said. The baby was coming but it was also continuing to recede back at the end of the pushes. The next push was finally the one that Anna had been waiting for, with a epic push and struggle, the head finally emerged. It was a relief to Anna to finally have the head out. She wiggled and pushed again, the first shoulder popped free. With the next push the other shoulder and body slipped free. Anna was elated to finally have the baby out. She got to know the new baby, and allowed Tom to bond as well. “So, when can we have another Anna.” Tom said. “Don’t get any silly ideas.” Anna said.

[jessicaslittlelovesickmess]

In this moment

Pairing: Melissa Schemmenti x Reader, Reader x oc!Liam (platonic)

Warnings: toxic Melissa, hint to miscarriage, pregnancy, angst, depression, let me know if I missed anything also unedited

Pt.3 of why did you invite me? Pt.2 Pt.4 Pt.5

8 years ago…

I sat alone in the empty hall, Melissa had just left all but slamming the door behind her while I had the pregnancy test in my back pocket. I tried to tell her when I had gotten home that I took one at work but her bags were stacked and she was ready to go.

The words left my lips and all I could do was cry “M-mel baby” but she only looked away “Mel!” It was a weak attempt. I reached out and grabbed her arm as she continued to pack “Melissa stop!” But she wouldn’t.

“I’m pregnant!”

“No you’re not”

We had been using both Melissa’s and mine’s dna so far there had been a few losses “Melissa, I really am!” My voice caught in my throat. “You’ll only lose it again!” She yelled finally facing me “it-it wasn’t my fault” the redhead shook her head before grabbing her things and leaving.

It wasn’t my fault…

Getting used to her absence was hard and as my stomach grew it became much harder it felt like learning to live once again. There were days where the shower felt out of reach, food didn’t feel necessary and I couldn’t move- glued to the bed I once shared with her.

I couldn’t change the sheets for a while, trying to hold onto her scent pretending she was just on a trip until her scent faded and reality hit. She was gone.

She was gone.

And I would raise our child alone

Liam came over a week after she left and looked over at me in sympathy before rolling me off the bed and into the bath. He sat with me and washed my hair just talking to me, I loved him and I hoped he knew “Liam, how will I do this?” I asked him.

“You have me”

I have him

“Thank you” I cried into my hands still in the tub as he rubbed my back

“This clump of cells is also part Liam” he joked

“Careful people might think you’re straight” I rolled my eyes causing him to gasp “as your best friend, you should be thankful I would go straight for you”

“You’re a dick” I laughed “now help me out please the water is getting cold”

-

“It’s a girl” the doctor smiled as my eyes remained on the screen, a girl, a girl, my little girl. Melissa had wanted a girl.

This was all we had ever wanted

-

I stared in the mirror, four months and I felt huge. I traced the stretch marks expanding across my stomach. There is a child in there I thought with a bittersweet smile my little girl, I hadn’t given her a name yet.

-

My due date was nearing

Soon I will have my little girl in my arms, Liam stood in the kitchen making lunch while I finished decorating the nursery. My hand gently glided across the crib back and forth while I glanced around the room, it was a fairytale’s dream.

Fuck you Melissa Ann Schemmenti

I cursed mentally as I sat on the plush rocking chair, Ann- Anna that’s the name of my girl. Pollyanna a name that I had always loved.

My Pollyanna Leah Schemmenti

-

“Congratulations Mama” Liam choked out as he handed me a small bundle of pink blankets this had to be the first time in fifteen years I had ever seen him cry.

I peaked over the blankets looking at her, my girl, and I laughed sadly “she’s fucking ginger” Fuck you Melissa Schemmenti.

“My girl”

[ingravinoveritas]

I’m excited for the renewal of GO3 but I’m also kind of a little worried for David because he’s been performing McBeth for 6 six weeks now and rehearsals are also killer and now their set to film GO? Just thinking about this exhausts me so I can’t imagine how he would feel (and Michael also for that matter since he’s been rehearsing for his own show). Also, please please PLEASE don’t let GT and AL be in GO PLEASE

Hear, hear, and three cheers to the renewal of GO 3!

All I can say is, it's about damn time we finally got this announcement. I am ineffably thrilled as well to know that we will have our boys back together in Scotland to bring us the resolution to Aziraphale and Crowley's story.

In terms of filming, I did see the press release that said GO 3 filming would begin "soon," but I think "soon" is a relative term here. David's run in Macbeth goes until early February, and then Michael is in Nye at the National Theatre from the end of February until May 11th. So "soon" likely means a good six months from now at the earliest (i.e., mid 2024). Hopefully that means both David and Michael will have time to rest up and prepare for the start of filming GO 3, but I would imagine them both feeling a sense of excitement and anxiety at their forthcoming schedules.

What I think Michael and David likely do not feel anxiety about, however, is the prospect of getting to spend more time with each other. And we know they are already seeing each other at least somewhat regularly right now, what with Michael being in London at the moment, so it stands to reason that Michael and David are going to be frequent fixtures in each other's lives and worlds for a very good portion of the next year. Lovely.

In terms of Georgia and Anna possibly being in S3, I will echo what @thereallovebug previously excellently said, which is that it is very tiring to think that we haven't even had the GO 3 announcement for a day, and already people are calling for them to be cast in the show, and it's just...can we not even fully process/absorb this news before jumping to yelling at Neil to cast people? Or maybe just skip the "yelling at Neil to cast people" part completely? I'm just confused as to why there has to be an immediate call to have them in the show when there may not even be a place for them in it.

I also keep thinking of the discussion that took place when the news about GO 2 first came out, which was that having any family member of Michael's or David's would be distracting, and we saw what ended up happening with Peter Davison and Ty. I thought Peter did very well as Job, but Ty just seemed out of place the entire time and it was like you could "see" him acting instead of just...being, and as a result, his performance did not quite gel with the rest of the scene.

The takeaway point here is that the role of Ennon could have gone to any number of aspiring young actors, talented actors looking for a shot at the big time, but who did not get to have that opportunity due to nepotism. It only makes sense, then, that the same would hold true for GT and AL. And to me, it's disrespectful to the show, to Neil, and to Michael and David at this point to act as if GO 3 is somehow "not good enough" unless GT and AL are in it. As if the thousands of other talented actors in the UK aren't good enough simply because they're not Georgia and Anna. I've been accused on multiple occasions of only disliking Georgia and AL because of who their partners are, but the fact that so many people are only fans of theirs for the same reason is apparently not a problem.

(I will not go into detail here about the myriad of reasons why people are fans of Georgia and AL's because of who their partners are, but I suggest reading this post from @artificial-indulgence, who has perfectly enumerated my own thoughts on the subject.)

It is for the reasons that are mentioned in the post I just linked to that I feel many fans are unwilling to see the reality of things, which is that Georgia is a passable actor, but Anna is not, and any halfway decent casting director is not going to overlook that. I'm thinking back to an Ask I answered yesterday about her being edited out of the photo used for the I Talk Telly Awards and (more significantly) that no one actually seemed to notice that she was missing.

Given that, it's highly unlikely that someone whose performances are so unmemorable would be cast in the third installment of a major global TV show--at least purely based on merit. And knowing how important this third season is, how it's meant to resolve Aziraphale and Crowley's story and give us what Neil and Terry envisioned so many years ago, it would be truly unfortunate to see all of that overshadowed by other things.

But yes, today was very much a day filled with good news (and which I wholeheartedly appreciated, given that I am dealing with some difficult personal issues at the moment). More thoughts to come in a follow up post, so stay tuned...

[lover-of-mine]

Anna! Hi! Hello!

I literally just joined tumblr today to be able to anon ask you. I think I should be the anxiety anon (aa is for sure in honor of Capt. Dad Bobby Nash and not in bad taste) because even typing this makes me feel way too seen. Does this count as human interaction? Guys, is it gay social anxiety if you only have inside thoughts because the idea of having outside thoughts makes you unwell? I'm not shaking--no, check--I am totally shaking rn, which is making it hard to type. But, I feel like I have reached critical mass on my Buddie thoughts and I will explode if I can't share them.

It is probably very rude to bust through the wall of your house like the Kool-Aid Man, so I want to say that I love your voice--your characterization and dialogue, particularly how you use humor in your fics is just *chef's kiss* for me. I have read them all but can't anon comment. I love your color theory and costume meta, too. Your takes are so measured and thoughtful and honestly just logical in a time where 9-1-1blr feels kinda sorta unmoored in reality. Fuck Twitter, your spy network tag is now my news feed because fandom reading comprehension and critical thinking scores have plummeted recently. Lou Who knows why?

Some things that are making me laugh/cry/cry-laugh rn:

The cockfighting ring call in Bobby Begins Again (2x16). Let's talk about closet space, bro: he-who-must-not-be-named canonically full-body flinched at literal cock coming at him. Somehow this is his gayest canon moment to me even though he has 2 canon full-on face assault man-on-man kisses.

The bridge call finale in Season 6, which I haven't watched in a minute, so I welcome fact-checking. I can't recall if it happens at the end of Love Is in the Air (6x17) as a cliff-hanger or if it is in Pay It Forward (6x18) proper, but right before the truck hits the bridge and triggers the collapse, Bobby is on the medical call on the bridge and he verbally instructs "K*nnard" to do something. The extra, presumably 1 of the old man retired firefighters they use to fill-out the 118 ranks, is wearing the "K*nnard" turnouts that nobody needed since 2x16's very accurate "Fairwell T*mmy. The 217's Loss is Our Gain" cake. So, how's that for invisible string debunker costume meta. As of 6x18: K*nnard was literally just an unused turnout coat on a hook in the costume dept. "Who cares?!?" is the 118 and 9-1-1's motto, fr. Like, nobody remembers gaf that he's a pilot, too, in an episode where Lucy flies off in the air ambulance, never to be seen again. Is "becoming a pilot" 9-1-1's way of telling your kid the dog "went to the farm" when you really had it put down while they were at school?

My change.org petition is for Buck and Eddie to have OS and RG's tattoos. I know makeup has been covering them up for years, but it has been bothering me so much since the ABC switch. It's like they're using the same tone of cover-up for RG and OS and it reads so yellow-orange that I consider it color theory outlier. Like, real talk, what do yellow-orange arms mean for the data, Anna? Tattoo-having people are known to get more tattoos. This is normal. RG and OS have so many more tattoos now than in Season 2 that Season 7 and 8 Buck and Eddie look like they have skin conditions that stop at their watch-straps and somehow in Season 8 RG is getting forehead-only orange foundation? Listen, I consider myself fandom-standard unhinged, not completely deranged, but like the full body Ken-doll spray tan on OS in Masks (8x05) has pushed me over the edge.

My Ted Talk is titled "Hey, ABC: Buddie = Fiscal Responsibility" because, wtf, just stop paying superfluous guest actors to be love interests and let the 2 mains shack up like God T*m M*near intended. (I lowkey think that smart cookie JLH is a girlboss genius who tied herself to KC, yeah yeah because of chemistry, Madney forever, of course, but also as job security when she said that Chimney was what she wanted for Maddie.) Seriously, let's reallocate the bullshit love interest slush fund money and bring the kid home. I hardcore head canon that Ravi saw Gerrard from the buffet line at the medal ceremony and just noped the fuck out of there indefinitely.

I'm just gonna leave this all here and back away because I've maxed out on all the human/social interaction accepted fandom love language of hyperbolic ranting that I can partake in before I turn into a full-blown thunderstorm chihuahua.

Can someone please Uber me a clown car home?

My love, hi. This was so fucking great to read ksoskaoakoakaoaa I'm literally on the floor laughing. Thank you for the compliments on the fics and metas. When someone says they like my characterization, I ascend to a better plane of existence. Honestly, the cock fight calls is really something else kspskapakoaa and they just didn't bother checking if they had written someone off before using the turnout because they needed more people there I guess.

The tattoos one had me howling tho, the cover-up of Ryan's hand tattoo this season has been AWFUL and the fact that they just wax Oliver all over to cover him in orange foundation drives me nuts, like please, just let them have the tattoos. (I was actually informed that they would need to license the tattoo from the artist for every use of it depending on the tattoos they decide to keep and that's probably why don't let them keep them, but if we are not letting them keep them, please color match better).

Honestly, they just need to get together already, please end this madness, it's been long enough, let Ryan be paid to make out with Oliver like he's been wanting all along kspskspakaokapa

Anyway, I'm obsessed with you, thank you for this one 🫶🫶

[the-merry-thieves]

TLH Couples as Taylor Swift Songs

Because I wanted to connect two things I love :)

Cordelia & James: "You’re Losing Me" (throughout CoG and CoI) and "Lover" (end of CoT)

You're Losing Me: Cordelia had to pretend that she was fine and didn't love James for so long, and thought she needed to endure it alone. She gave James her "best mes", "endless empathy", until she couldn't anymore. Seeing James embrace Grace at the end of CoI was the final straw after years of slowly "losing" her because of Grace's spell

Then I threw in Lover because after all the emotional turmoil they've been through, they deserve a cute little love song now that they're finally happily married for real

Cordelia & Matthew: "Wonderland"

This song just captures the mood of their lil spontaneous Paris getaway - trying to escape reality by throwing themselves into the wonderland of Paris (also, Cheshire cat smile and green eyes; come on, this song was made for our favorite charming, tortured-soul green-eyed boy)

Thomas & Alastair: "Begin Again"

This song is Thomas giving Alastair everything that Charles could never, and helping Alastair see that he is worthy of love and deserves the world (someone please give me more Thomastair x Taylor Swift suggestions, I could definitely do better but I can't think of more rn)

Lucie & Jesse: "Enchanted"

Every time I hear this song I think of the scene where Jesse tells Lucie to command him to dance, and then they dance together, and "the night was hushed, enchanted". One of my favorite Ghostwriter (do people use this ship name) scenes. Truly only the very first page; Lucie was determined to see him (*alive*) again...

Grace & Christopher: "Mine"

Because Grace & Christopher deserved to live in happiness together and we can just pretend the last 200 pages of CoT never happened! I think of this song as their story that *could* have been. It represents how Kit brought out the best in Grace and forgave her past wrongs, and how Grace didn't think she could have true romantic feelings for anyone ("wondering why we bothered with love") until she met Kit

Anna & Ari: "Untouchable" and "I Can See You"

I imagine Untouchable as Ari talking about Anna and how she's this emotionally guarded, beautiful but unattainable figure; in CoI she describes Anna as "hard and bright as a diamond. Untouchable" & "like starlight... it seemed warm and radiant and near, but was in truth uncountable miles away". I think this song depicts how Ari sees Anna so perfectly

As for I Can See You, the sensual, clandestine romance in this song is so Anna & Ari. There's just something inherently sapphic about a secret love

(Bonus?) Tatiana & Rupert: "right where you left me"

No explanation needed for this one...

---------------------------------------------------

Give me all of your favorite Shadowhunters-inspired music suggestions!

The blue text is quotes from the songs and the purple text is quotes from the books, if anyone cares

[lordhavemercyyyyy]

I WROTE THIS IN THE 7TH GRADE SO ENJOY MY CRINGE

IT'S SCP BASED, SCP 3001, I WAS OBSESSED OKAY?!?!?!?

Dr. Robert Scranton and his wife, Dr. Anna Lang, the site directors for SCP Foundation site 120, the main containment and research site for anomalous objects and entities with reality-bending abilities, not only made the Scranton Stabilizer, but have also created a prototype for the Lang-Scranton Stabilizer (LSS). During a test in the site’s Reality Lab, major seismic activity rocked the site to its core. While nobody noticed at the time, a hole opened in the control panel which Dr. Scranton was operating, dragging Dr. Scranton and the control panel into what is now known as SCP-3001. The researchers at site 120 believed that Dr. Scranton died quickly without any pain at all. But, they couldn’t be sure.

SCP-3001 is reported to be an alternate universe which presents as a pitch-black space, with not a single bit of light or life at all. No food, no water, nothing. This is what Dr. Scranton endured for 5 years, 11 months, and 21 days. 2 years in, however, Dr. Scranton made a certain discovery, the only reason we have a record of what lies within SCP-3001 to this day.

2 years. For 2 years, Dr. Scranton walked through the darkness. He couldn’t stop and eat; there was no food or water there. He couldn’t die, either; this seemed normal, in a way. After all, this was another world, the kind of thing Dr. Scranton studied for a living, at a job he shared with his wife. His wife. Anna. He almost forgot her name. Things have been slipping from his memory lately. His thoughts trailed off as he walked through the darkness, walking slowly towards the blinking red light.

Wait. Light? There isn’t anything that can emit light here. There shouldn’t be.

The light grew closer. The control panel! Soon, that very control panel became an anchor for Dr. Scranton. 3 more years flew by. In that time, Dr. Scranton had managed to decipher why this place was the way it is. The hume level was so very, very low. The hume level of an object reflects on how real it is, at least, in our understanding of reality according to how our plane of existence operates. Time passed, and as it did, Dr. Scranton could feel himself slowly fading away. He started repeating certain crucial facts. Name? Robert Scranton. Favorite color? Blue. Wife? Anna. This would go on and on. One day, he started to feel… strange. He looked down at himself and saw his own cells being pulled apart and becoming one with the darkness surrounding him. Pulling away more, and more, and more, until all that was left was a couple organs, a blood-stained control panel, and one gold ring.

Around 15 years later, there in the very lab this all started in, as Dr. Anna Lang stood in that lab, the control panel suddenly returned to that lab, to our plane. Dr. Lang stared at the control panel, horrified. She saw the organs, the blood, and the ring. Suddenly, she knew. They were wrong about her husband’s death. Robert didn’t die quickly like they all thought. He must have suffered so, so much. Anna picked up the ring, the last shred of the man she loved. She kept it in her pocket when she went to work each day for a while. After some time, she put it on a necklace and wore that necklace wherever she went. Anna never forgot him. She never could. She soon stayed in her office later and later into the night. Her coworkers would joke that she might as well start sleeping on site, since that was the only thing she went home to do. She would often become quite upset at these comments, and those who remarked about such things soon ceased to do so.

Dr. Lang was working late that night, as usual. She was sitting there at her desk, focused on the papers in front of her, illuminated by the incandescent lightbulb in her lamp. She looked up sharply. She heard something. Footsteps. Probably someone on security passing by. But then again, these footsteps weren’t like a guard’s. They were lighter, and a guard’s heavy boots couldn’t make such little noise. Dr. Lang stood from her chair to investigate the sound. As she walked, she heard another sound, something she didn’t recognize, coming from behind her. She turned to look, immediately seeing the kidney sitting atop her papers. She could tell, even without touching it, that if she did, it would still be warm. She heard another sound, a slow dripping noise from the same direction she heard the footsteps coming from. Turning around once again, Dr. Lang saw the black ooze dripping from the ceiling. Drip, drip, drip. She quickly ran out of the room and down the hallway, calling for help. She turned a corner and saw one of the mobile task force officers down the hallway she was running into. Dr. Lang recognized him. Frank! He could help her! She called out to him, and he turned quickly. He saw the fear on her face and soon reached for his gun.

Drip, drip, drip. Black ooze once again began dripping from the ceiling, but this time, it wasn’t just ooze that came from the ceiling. This time, an old man dropped down from the ooze. Frank began shooting at him, but the man soon grabbed him and dragged him down into a puddle of the same ooze that was on the ceiling, now on the floor. Dr. Lang ran away from that spot as fast as she could. She got quite far, but she tired herself out. She stopped running and took a moment to rest. But rest is a valuable privilege that SCP foundation staff are deprived of. The old man appeared beside Dr. Lang. She tried to run, but the old man grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards him.

“Anna.”

Dr. Lang froze. He knew her name. She turned and looked at his face. Now that she was really looking, she slowly began to recognize him. “Robert…?” The old man smiled, and soon Anna returned that familiar smile she knew was her husband’s. She hugged him, ignoring the fact that her arm was slowly turning into the same black ooze that Robert could now create. Anna no longer cared. She was happy. Her husband was back, and she felt that if she died there, in that hallway, she would die happy. The ooze continued to spread, and Dr. Anna Lang was no more. She became part of the ooze, and she would remain by her husband’s side… forever.

[kaspenhoward]

A Day In The Queens Home When Anne Is In Hyper fixation Mode:

The Queens minus Anne: [Peaking through the doorway to the living room]

Kat whispering as to not disturb Anne: Has she even moved this whole time?

Anna: Not unless it’s to flip a page, pick up the next book, shift around, or go to the bathroom.

Jane: Has she even ate or drank any water? She’s just been reading books about languages for hours. By the time she’s done she’ll know of the history of every language in the world.

Catalina slightly loud: Out of all the forsaken things the lady can even obsess over, it’s the history of languages that she’s interested in??

Everyone minus Catalina and Anne: Shhhhh!!!

Catalina quieter: Alright! Alright! I get it, I’ll be quiet.

Cathy: Should we be more concerned about the fact that Anne literally is so engrossed with such an arbitrary subject that she won’t even move from her spot on the couch and has devoured three books in less than the span of 48 hours?!

Jane concerned: She didn’t sleep last night??

Cathy: No. She went upstairs and pretended to sleep for a few minutes so Catalina would go through her nightly check of all our rooms, see that everyone was asleep, and then would go to sleep when she knowing everyone was safe and accounted for. Anne then went back to her place on the couch and read through the entirety of night where we found her reading this morning up to now.

Kat: Should we.. try to snap her out of it? She really should get some sleep. And drink and eat something.

Jane: I don’t know. She might be going through something and avoiding it, she does seem to be enjoying herself though.. Cathy?

Cathy: I read about something like this on the internet. It’s called “hyper fixation” and is a symptom of the mental illness called “Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder”, which could actually explain plenty of Anne’s behaviors and difference in personality since reincarnation. When some is “hyper fixating” the person for a period of time obsesses on a person, activity, object, concept, story, or topic, when this occurs the person usually ignores everyone and everything around them. “Tuning out” reality. Of course they can provide their attention to reality around them when they unfocus but will continue to consistently think and talk about it. I think this is what’s going on with Anne. It isn’t really as bad as it seems though, as long as the person maintains a connection with reality, makes sure to care for oneself, and practices grounding techniques they’ll be fine.

All the queens minus Anne and Cathy: . . .

Anna: Babes. I hope you know we didn’t understand half of what you said. But does this thing, that you just explained, the reason why Anne is so scarily smart?

Cathy: No exactly but it does encourage her thirst for knowledge.

Kat: Doesn’t answer my question, what are we gonna do about this? [Gestures to Anne, sitting on the couch intensely reading a book about the history of the Norwegian language]

Cathy: Just because I know what’s going on doesn’t mean I know what to do!

Catalina: Can’t we just get her some food and water and put some sleeping drugs in it?

Jane: No Catalina. We’re not drugging Anne! But the food and water suggestion is probably the better idea. Maybe Kat can coax her into sleeping?

Kat: I may have legendary cuddles but it is impossible to coax Anne into sleeping.

Anna: Just give it a shot, maybe her exhaustion will catch up to her!

The Queens minus Anne and Kat: [Look at Kat expectingly with pleading eyes]

Kat:

Kat: [Sigh] I love my cousin, but why am I the one always sent to the do the dirty work?

The other queens: We love you Kat!

Kat: Yeah.. Yeah.. Sure, just go get the stuff for Anne-

Anne pauses, closes her book, and stares at all of them with bloodshot eyes: . . .

The Other Queens, Frozen: . . .

Anne: . . .

Jane: Did you-

Anne: Yes I heard everything you guys are uncharacteristically loud and I can’t tune out noise no matter how quiet it is. I read like this in my past life just like in this one. Yes someone please get me something to eat and drink my head is pounding, and yes I’ll gladly take some Kat cuddles. I should be mad at you all for suggesting drugging me and discussing of me like this but I am worse for wear enough that I’ll accept the help.

The Queens Minus Anne: [Let out a collective sigh of relief]

Catalina: I’ll just take- [Reaches for Anne’s book]

Anne: Hands off my book. Lina, My acceptance for help does not equate to stealing my property!

The Other Queens: [Muffled giggles]

Catalina: Yup. Should have seen that one coming. Ever the queen you still are.

Anne: Once a Queen always a Queen. We’re all Queens here. I must thank you all for worrying about me, now if that’s over, I was promised some cuddles?

[dtmsrpfcringe]

So I came across this post on my dash and I would love to hear your take on it: ❤️

https://www.tumblr.com/irvinis/751566583397285888/angelsadvocate96-thank-you-for-this-detailed?source=share

In my opinion the art is beautiful and hurts no one, I don't believe it deserved that reply on twitter. What bothers me is the comments and theories. What is crazy to me is calling anyone who doesn't believe Michael and David are dating a homophobic. Also the whole "Michael never called Anna his wife" yeah because they're partners, not married. They've dated women as far as we know all their lives. Again, they also quote all the sexual comments Michael and David make to eachother as proof that they're dating.

There's also a very amusing comment that I must highlight: "They deliberately cropped a photo to just include David and Georgia, and ignored the "Michael is my work wife" quote by david in order to fit their narrative that Dt and Gt are in love."

I found it funny because they do the same. They ignore the many posts with their children looking happy, the videos with anna and georgia looking in love, doing stuff together, the quotes of them praising anna and georgia in interviews, talking about how much they love them and their kids, and only focus on the comments/pics/videos of Michael and David talking about each other 😂 why can't both loves coexist?? Why can't they be in a loving poly relationship? Why can't they be in love with their partners and just have a close friendship with one another? No, the only option they entertain in their brains is "gay couple/affair"? And we're the ones who are homophobic and close minded? So before they met they were doing what for years and years? Pretending to be in love and having kids "just cause"? 3 of the kids were born after they met on go if I'm not mistaken so how does that fit the timeline? 😂 I'm not gonna get into having sex just for making babies cause next thing we know we are demanding celebrities to make sex tapes each time they do it to prove it to us \0_0/

(When I say "us" I'm not talking about the person in the tweet, but the fandom in general whom they usually call antis or Georgia and Anna fans lmao)

I'm not saying them being in a romantic relationship with each other is impossible. As a bi woman, i never assume anyone's sexuality. But when you have female partners, and fall for a male, that's called being bi! I'm sorry everyone but these men are not gay as in homosexual! They can very much be bisexual and believe me, if they one day came out I would be the first person to say: they were right, we were wrong!

But please, don't be someone who simply denies bisexuality to exist. Anyone of any gender can be bi and be in a monogamous relationship, a poly relationship, with both men and women. It doesn't invalidate or make the other relationship less than!

My opinions aside, their sexuality is none of our business. Sure, I know fans like to speculate and I understand it, but we can't simply choose one option and claim it as reality above all else and brush off the other ones. We don't know what goes on behind closed doors so it's really dumb to claim we do based off of the little we see on tv/social media! - and yes I am including my view as well! By the little I see, they can be 2 happy straight couples, a poly quadruple (sorry if that's not the term), a bi couple (ignoring the ladies), but what they 100% are is 4 friends who love eachother and seen to be quite happy. And I'm very happy about that too.

I'm sorry for the long rant I've been awake for 2 days and am a zombie

sorry if this seems like it doesn't make sense I just woke up....

lmaoooo sorry I read this post and then had to read it again. Let me say this right fucking now: ITS NOT HOMOPHOBIC TO RESPECT BOUNDARIES THESE GODDAMN PEOPLE ARE GONNA KILL ME!!!!!

Also you're so right. There are a multitude of reasons the photo could have been cropped as well. When you post specifically about a couple you probably want the photo to be...well...about that couple. It's not that hard to figure out. There's a really funny thing here, where they say they're trying to make David and Georgia seem in love. There's no seem. They are in love here. I hate it when people pull this shit because what in the hell do you mean seem?! Things could be different if they were shit talking (joking doesn't count, bc if we wanna bring up jokes David and Michael have made about each other then we can, I'll be overjoyed.) or getting a divorce, but every indication they have they just completely made up.

The homophobia thing. I am bisexual. Nova, when she helped me run this was a gnc lesbian. Respecting the boundaries of complete strangers does NOT make you a fucking homophobe.

[rarepairnation]

hi abby!! you love talking abt your fics? well, as it happens, i LOVE listening to people talk abt their fics *high-fives you* so hereee u go: 8, 17, 23, 24, 33 and 40 :)

hiiii ria thank you <333 [high fives you back] this is a beautiful synergy we are living...sorry this took me several days i just kept not having a shareable last line. for every we're so back there is always an it's so over. we're here now and that's what matters LOL

8. share the last line that you wrote

you have kept me waiting, my lord steward, she says when his footsteps stop, his reflection hovering just out of reach of her mirror.

well this is NOT umbar fic OR condolences congratulations. one day i will learn to finish one thing before i start another. but it is set in a slightly alternate version of the same reality. this is the crazy forty years later everyone lives au where aragorn is king and denethor is his steward and finduilas is actually the one running the place. it’s just an excuse for me to write “what if we made our healthy loving political marriage a messier and more political v-shape because you just HAD to officially get back together with your situationship from when you were 25 and oh he just HAPPENS to be the king.” they are shockingly functional about it (i do not know if i could call it healthy. but it is Incredibly High-Functioning and They Are Having Fun. so who am i to stop them!). conceptually/vibes-wise this is the result of my mind stirring around "their wives know the steward serves the king, and sometimes that goes beyond matters of state" (like truly...WHOA boy. that knocked me flat. @bretwalda-lamnguin i WILL respond to that post eventually i have things to say they just have to marinate a little longer) + regent!finduilas as a concept and an Energy + finduilas's general pure concentrated "i can fix him" beam + also going on a tangent off of anna @potatoesandsunshine's "our marriage is already bad enough what if we ruined someone else's life with it" theory. and this came out.

17. what is your favourite trope to write

NAMES AND TITLES AND MANNERS OF ADDRESS BABY!!! that shit is like drugs for me. whenever i'm messing around with it i feel like i am at the very height of caring about and understanding my own work i KNOW that sounds obnoxious as hell but like. aghhhhh. im in there THINKING. about specifically when and where and how one manner of address might shift to another and whether that is different inside the narration and out loud and what each name and title means in which situation. yeah im normal about hierarchies why do you ask.

23. where do you usually write

my beloved local coffeeshop down the street from my apartment! i am there as i write this. my regular barista often makes fun of me bc he sees me running for the train in the morning bc i am perpetually late for work. unfortunately the earliest i can make it out of the house in the evening is 7 and they close at 9 but it’s a good two hours. then it’s off to my friends’ apartment (they’re my downstairs neighbours i basically also live there) for like another two hours. yeah i do this every day. i am aware i am insane but it is the only way i get anything done.

24. which fic do you think is your funniest

hmm. i feel like im not often intending to be particularly funny. wait no its definitely open arms. “sokka, panicking: you like guys!” is literally in the description. i wrote it bc of a shitpost. WOW that is possibly the throwback of all time. that’s like the first fic i wrote back when i started getting really Good at writing because i was wildly hyperfixated on avatar and it was covid and i wrote 100k in a year. well well well

33. which of your fic titles is your favourite

ok i did do this one but im gonna give a runner up. TO THE VERY DEAR MEMORY OF [ ] is a personal fave for sure bc it's. idk nontraditional? well it's based off of this image and it took me a long time of testing different things before i figured out a way to appropriately represent that erasure of the name on the headstone by the water...the sensation that there Used to be something there, that there was Supposed to be something there, but all that is left is the water. and i'm very pleased by the effect of the brackets and how it looks on the ao3 page. it just brings me a lot of joy to let myself kind of fuck around and do whatever i think is cool. im trying so so so hard to internalize "get weird with it!" and its the baby steps out here.

40. pick one of your fics and share a quote to go with it (not a quote from the fic, but an outside quote that fits)

ooh ok a throwback. race for a hurricane (speaking of the titles/names/manners of address trope this is my BEST execution of it) + "the french have a saying: the fate of glass is to break. maybe the fate of spies is to just fade away. but with any luck, we leave something behind" -spectre, 2015. im getting that last line tattooed someday.

fic writer asks

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved in our archive

The cost is set to go far beyond human suffering, yet almost five years into the pandemic, not only are there still no treatments for long Covid, there aren’t even any diagnostic tools – and we don’t seem overly interested in finding them.

The jig is up. People are catching on that “mild” Covid-19 may not be so mild, and that the mysterious lingering symptoms they’ve experienced after catching the virus, such as fatigue and brain fog, may just be connected. For others, this will be the first time that they put two and two together. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but strap in for what comes next.

Recently, RNZ ran a piece outlining the estimated $2bn per year economic cost of long Covid in New Zealand and signalling that further research would be needed to determine a more precise figure. The average reader would assume that this research is under way or has at least been planned and funded. Human suffering aside, such a hit to productivity would surely raise alarm bells across the political spectrum!

I say this solemnly: yeah… nah.

Almost five years into the pandemic, not only are there still no treatments for long Covid, there also aren’t even any diagnostic tools – and we don’t seem overly interested in finding them.

At present, a long Covid diagnosis relies on a patient finding a doctor with up-to-date knowledge, who will believe their symptoms, and who will spend time investigating further to rule out other possibilities. This mythical trifecta is out of reach for most people, particularly women, who are affected by immune conditions at far higher rates, but have their symptoms written off as hysteria; and Māori and Pasifika, who face barriers to healthcare, and have their symptoms written off as laziness. Obtaining accurate data on prevalence under these circumstances is simply impossible.

In this way, and several others, long Covid mirrors ME/CFS (myalgic encephalomyelitis), a brutally debilitating biophysical condition, though the oft misused term “chronic fatigue” doesn’t quite convey that. Around half of long Covid sufferers meet the criteria for ME/CFS, which by the World Health Organization’s scale has a worse disease burden than HIV/Aids, multiple sclerosis (MS), and many forms of cancer. But again, there are no treatments.

I suffer from ME/CFS myself. My illness predates Covid-19 and came on after an infection with cytomegalovirus (CMV). I went from a fit and active young man to debilitatingly sick and fatigued, with several unexplained symptoms.

Pre-pandemic there was estimated to be more than 25,000 people in New Zealand suffering from ME/CFS, and only one specialist in the country, working one day a week, who has since retired (well earned, bless her). For years I had been praying for any sort of diagnosis, even if it was bad, so that I could get on the path to recovery. I got the diagnosis – but for a disease with no path to recovery.

As the pandemic unfolded, patients and advocates in the ME/CFS community warned that a tsunami of disability was approaching. They were of course ignored, as they have been for decades, and are now joined by masses of long Covid sufferers facing the reality that the medical profession has no answers for them, except perhaps euthanasia.

Frustrated with my lack of options, I connected with cellular immunologist Dr Anna Brooks, who had become a leading expert on long Covid, so I assumed that her biomedical research would be well supported. Alas, she detailed the uphill grind that it’s been to gain traction compared to other countries, and that generous donations, usually from patients themselves, had been the driving force of funding.

Together we founded DysImmune Research Aotearoa, with the goal of developing diagnostic tools leading to treatment for post-viral illnesses like long Covid and ME/CFS. In layman’s terms, we collect blood samples, analyse differences in cells, and put together an immune profile. My priority is ensuring that Māori and Pasifika patients and researchers are at the table and taking action into our own hands.

We’ve made a small start, and we have some incredible collaborations lined up, with far-reaching implications for community health. We’re in the process of seeking partnerships to take things forward. The expertise exists, it’s here in New Zealand. Still, the barrier to progress across the research space is the urgency for resourcing. It is dire to say the least.

Without some long-term project certainty, it’s difficult to pull the necessary teams together. While study after study illuminates more horrifying long-term effects of Covid infections, and prevention has been completely abandoned, research and development for treatments for long Covid is tanking. The private sector is at the whim of the quarterly financial report, and with no guaranteed short-term profit in treating us, it has very little incentive to take the risk.

So, barring some philanthropic miracle, only government can fill this gap. Yet where Australia had set aside A$50m specifically for long Covid research, and the US Senate considers a billion-dollar long Covid “moonshot” bill, New Zealand has allocated nothing. We’re fast asleep at the wheel. No other country can determine how many of our people are impacted by post-viral illnesses. No other country can address our specific needs.

Since this government is focused on ambition, productivity and fast-tracking, I assume they’d want to be world leaders in research, warp-speed some projects, and get long Covid sufferers back into work, no? This is what we are calling for. Not surveys. Not “talk” therapy and positive thinking. Biomedical research.

Put the money down and commit to this. Seize this opportunity to right decades of neglect. There are tens of thousands of us fighting for our lives, and millions more around the world. You think it won’t be you, then after your next inevitable Covid-19 reinfection, it is, and you’re left to wonder why nobody stepped up.

Government, iwi and whānau ora groups, health organisations, philanthropists – reach out. Let’s work.

Rohan Botica (Te Ātihaunui-a-Pāpārangi, Ngāti Tūwharetoa) is a lived-experience researcher and co-founder of DysImmune Research Aotearoa.

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 3.5/5

Book Blurb:

A relatable adult graphic novel about a woman who skips Sunday mass for the first time in her life only to discover she's possibly being possessed by a demon.

As a recovering Irish American Catholic, she has mostly traded the world of communion and confessionals for the “city-girl” struggle of work-life balance, family, and her relationships. The only thing she has not been able to shake is her fear that something bad will happen if she misses Sunday mass.

But her fears become a reality when she skips mass for the first time and discovers she is now being possessed by a demon claiming to be the prince of hell. As she takes matters into her own hands and attempts to exorcise these demons (both the paranormal and emotional kind), Catherine must face her buried guilt and what it truly means to be good.

A cathartic and engaging view into the messy life of an urban women in her early twenties, Anna Meyer's Saint Catherine is truly a story of letting go of guilt and taking responsibilities for your desires, hopes, and mistakes.

Review:

A girl who was raised as an Irish American Catholic finds her life turned upside down when she skips Sunday mass for the first time and begins to think she is possessed by a demon. When your entire life is spent revolved around the being Catholic, it can be hard to separate. After moving out of her family house and living alone, she still has one rule: always attend Sunday mass. Yet when her boyfriend convinces her to skip....things take a turn for the worst as she begins to see a demon, a demon that only appears and talks to her... and she begins to question whether or not she is a good person and why she is condemned to hell. This was a really interesting story about what faith can do to a person and how it can warp our sense of morality. I liked reading the author's explanation and discussion of why they wrote this story and how it was inspired by their own experiences. It's definitely a good read for anyone who is separating from their religious upbringing.

Release Date: April 29,2025

Publication/Blog: Ash and Books (ash-and-books.tumblr.com)

*Thanks Netgalley and First Second Books | 23rd St. for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[asmutwriter]

Phone Call (Dean x f!reader)

DESCRIPTION: (season 11) After a long day at work you get back home and receive a phone call from an emotionally (or as emotional as he gets) Dean Winchester

A/N - I hope you guys don’t mind the fact that I write fluff content to try and help show the build up of their relationship. I feel like it helps you see their dynamic grow if it has some angst and fluff rather then just pure smut. I say this, I do have an idea for a smutty scene so stay tuned for that

WORD COUNT: 2350

One Shots / ‘You Saved Me’

WARNINGS: swearing, light implications of insomnia/anxiety, flirting, 

DISCLAIMERS

- This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

- Not been proof read

- This was part of my ‘You Saved Me’ series however I wasn’t keen on how it fit with the characters so I have made it part of an ‘alternative reality’ version of the main characters from that story

“Thank you Hope... for saving our son” the woman says as she holds your hands. You smile at her. 

“Its my pleasure to help” you look at her as she kisses your hands. She heads over to her son. You pick up the box that now contains the demon inside of it. Going to your car and driving to your secure lock up. Filled with various items used for securing demons and ghosts. Or cult items used for worship. Anything that youve dealt wih that holds significant power you have kept safe here. You place the new addition onto one of the shelves. Blessing the room before you leave.

You unlock your front door. Loking it again behind you as you place the keys onto the hook. Hearing a soft humming coming from the living room. You walk in. The two girls curled up under a blanket on the sofa. Billy on the floor with his back resting agaisnt the same sofa. The three of them watching a film “Sorry Im so late back. Had a problem at work that meant I had to stay overtime”

“Its ok mum. We ordered a chinese. Left some of it for you in the fridge” Anna says, titling her head to look at you. You smile. Going over and kissing the top of her head

“You guys all done you’re homework?” they nod “oh you guys are so good. I’ll be in in a second” you smile at them as you go into the kitchen. Grabbing out the leftivers and heatung it up. Then joinging them in the living room as they watch their film. Once it finishes they slowly make their way to bed. Lydia having a quick shower, Billy making them all a hot drink as Anna packs her school bag ready for the morning. You unload the dishwasher as you takj to him “Ive already said this to the girls but I have a work thing tomorrow afternoon so I wont be able to pick you guys up from school. You’ll have to get the bus back”

“God I hate the bus”

“I know. Im sorry. But I can drive you in so you all get a lie in” you smile at him as he chuckles. 

“When they come in here tell them their drinks are ready. Im going to bed” he smiles “night”

“Goodnight” you say as he walks out. A few minutes later and botht e girl walk in. They take their drinks and also say goodnight. Heading off to their rooms. You do your usual check of the house. Making sure all the doors are locked and secure before reteiring to your bed. Getting in you snuggle under the soft duvet. Jumping slightly as you hear your ohone buzz, Turning on the bedside lamp you pick it up. Why was he ringing ths late at night? you answer it. 

“Hey Rose” he says.

“Dean. Is everything ok?”

“Yeah. I just thought that I should be better at keeping in touch with you. As we always say we will and never do. Thought Id start the process of it”

“But this late at night?”

“Its not- shit sorry. Didnt realise how late it had gotten. I’ll leave you to sleep” you shake your head as you rest your head down on pillow.

“No its ok. Its nice to hear from you. Like you said, we need to keep in contact more often then we do as we always say we will” a soft chuckle coming down the phone. “Did you have a hunt today then?”

“Yeah. Had a bit of a weird case today and I needed to talk to someone to help clear my head”

“What was the case?”

“A banshee. It really managed to screw with my head today. Quite badly screwed with it infact. But thats enough about my life. How are you and the girls? And Billy now I guess?”

“Theyre all good. We had a bit of a ghost problem in our old house so we had to move but that was a few months ago now”

“A ghost problem? ANd you didnt call me?” you laugh slightly

“Im a grown up. I can deal with my own ghosts” a soft chuckle coming down the phone

“How did the others react to you javeing a haunted house?”

“Well... they dont know. Well the girls dont anyway. Billy saw the spirit. He doesnt liek talking about it as he thinks hes going insane but he saw her. I didnt tell the girls. I just said that we had to move. Thankfully they know how I am with staying in one place to long so didnt question it”

“They dont know about the ghost then?”

“They dont know about ghosts period. And I plan on keeping it that way. The less they know about monsters the better”

“I agree with you on that” you rub yoru eyes slightly. Standing up you wrap your dressing gown around you as you head to the kitchen. You dont register that he was talking to you as you walked until you hear him say your name “Kat?”

“Sorry what did you say?” he laughs, you can almsot hear him shaking his head

“I asked how long youve been in your new place”

“Oh gosh. About 9 months Id say” you grab a cereal bar from the cupbaord “how long have youlived in your place?”

“We moved in about three years ago”

“Its just you and Sam there right?”

“Yeah. I mean Cas lives with us too but not constantly”

“Ive not heard you talk about Cas before”

"Hes just a friend of ours. Hes an angel”

“An angel? As in...”

“Yeah. Feathers, harps, robes, all that shit”

“I jave images of you and your brother being serrenaded each morning as you wake by a random man wearing a robe and playing a harp” he laughs

“Sadly not quite that ammusing” you chuckle soflt

“Thats a shame. Id pay money to see that”

“I would too” you smile as you finish off your food. Standing up you turn off the kitchen light. Going back into your room you hang your dressing gown on the back of the door before you climb into bed. Sitting cross legged with the duvet over your lower half. “What does he look like then? This angel friend of yours”

“Why? You hoping hes cute so you can get laid?”

“Shut up” a chuckle going down the phone “no I was just curious as to if he looked like how the bible depicts them to look like”

“No. Similar to demons they posess people so they look like whoever they are possessing. But angels have to ask for permission”

“Oh at least they are keen on peoes consent to be a meat puppet” another soft chuckle down the phone. You smile down the phone

“Thining of friends, how is... whats her name...” a pause as he thinks. “Tash. Thats her name. How is she?” you let out a small scoff as you roll your eyes

“Im not sure. Havent heard from her directly in about 3 weeks. She moved to Spain”

“Oh...”

“Please do sound more disapointed” you say sarcasticly “really helps buid up my attraction towards you”

“No I- I didnt mean it like that” you chuckle as he tries to backtrack

“Just keep digging dude. Keep digging”

“I just wanted to know how she was doing. Thats all”

“Oh of course. Defiantly not because you wanted to ask me for her number a you forgot to get it when you last saw her”

“SHut up” you smile as you grab your water from your side, sipping it slightly “do you have her number though?”

“I do. But I feel liker he new boyfriend might be a bit pissed at me if I gave it to you” you laugh as he lets out an annoyed sigh

“Just a quick thing. Next time lead with that information”

“Aww but it was funny hearing you sound all hopeful” you mock him down the phone

“Bitch” he playfully mutters down the phone

“Im offended. Truly” you let out a soft laugh as he pauses on the other side

“WHat did you mean by your attraction towards me?” you can hear the smirk in his voice

“Wh-what do you mean?” you curxe at yourself silently for sutterong

“You said that it helos build up your attraction towards me. Just wanted to know what you eamtn by that exactly?” the teasing in his voice evident.

“I said it sarcasticly so...” you shrug “wouldnt think to much into it” you smile as he lets put a soft ‘uh huh’ down the phone.

“You sure that it doesnt mean that you have secretly have the hots for me?”

“You wish” he chuckles slightly. His voice goi g lower as he speaks

“I dont make you squirm just by the sound of my voice? That you dont think of me on those lonely nights when its just you and your thoughts?” you move slightly. Trying to think of a good comeback as his words go straight to your core.

“Idiot” you mutter. He chuckles

“Thats the best you got?”

“SHut up. Its late and I wasnt expecting this conversation”

“SO what you have to have a comeback prethpught of?”

“How would me hanging up on you be for a comeback?”

“Ok ok. Im sorry” you roll your eyes “I get it though. I am devilishly handsome”

“I would so kick your ass right now if you were here”

“Oh Id like to see you try sweetheart” once again you can hear the cocky grin on his face. You glare at the wall as you hear him let out a soft chuckle. 

“how is Sam?”

“Hes good. He met someone tday that I think hes pretty keen on. Of course he would never admit that” you chuckle soflty

“Of course not” you smile down the phone “How about you? You got any fancy ladies?” he chuckles soflty. Pausing for a little bit before he answers

“Im very much single” he says, you can hear a soft smile on his voice “how about you? You got any special man? Or woman for that matter?”

“No. To both of those. I did go on a date a couple of weeks ago withh a guy”

“Oh yeah? How did that go?”

“It went well. Very well actually. Until I realised he didn actually like kids. Very much disliked children. SO I just kind of... left him... didnt really think we would becompatable considering I have three”

“Three? When did you pop anotherone out?”

“Im incorporationg Billy into the mix. Gotta include the adoptive son” he chuckles slightly

“Yes. Having met him I can picture him being quite upset if you didnt consider him one of yours”

“Oh very much so. He insisited we had new family pictures done proffesionally so he was part of them. Its cute to be honest. I think hes just happy that he has a family again. Only downside is that Im more outnumbered when it comes to thwm asking for a pet”

“Oh really?”

“Yep. Im not keen on getting a pet anything. Lyida really wants a pet cat and Anna was never bothered. So it was essentially even. But now Billy wants a cat to. SHes done some sort of jedi mind trick on him to want to get one I think” he chuckles

“You could get a cat”

“No. Dont you side with them either”

“You could though. Really help add to your stress levels I feel. Needing to look after another living thing” you roll your eyss at his sarcasm

“Theyd look after it well enough. They always forget to drink and eat themselves but are great at reminding each other to do it” he chuckles softly down the phone

“Yeah that sounds about right. Exactly like their mother”

“SHut up” you glare down the phone, hearing him let out another chuckle. You smile. There was something about bis  laugh that coule easliy light up a room. You mentally shake yourself before mvoing under your duvet. STretching your legs out under the soft sheets, hearing Dean let out a muffled yawn on th enother end of the line. You chuckle slighty “Am I keeping you up?”

“No. Defiantl not. I did ring you so its me whos keeping you up, surely”

“ou arent wrong. But it is-” you look at the clock on the bedside table “12:06am. So I understand if you’re tired” he laughs slightly. 

“Ive stayed up way later then this”

“We cant pull an all nighter”

“And why not?” although the tone in his voice was slightly mocking, the way it sounded made you realise he was asking it as a genune question as well.

“No we cant. I have work tomorrow. Plus I have to get the girls and Billy to school” a soft ‘oh’ leaves his lips. The sadness in his voice making your heart break. You shut your eyes. Trying to think of a solution that meets you both. “I would say that you’re welcome to come round. But its very late and I imagine you wont want to travel far just for the sake of a sleepover” 

“Id like to. A lot actually. But I shouldnt. Too much going on for me to leave in the middle of the night. I really wish I could though. More then you think” you smile softly as you nod

“I understand. You have a hectic life. Saving the world and everything. Cant be easy”

“No its certainly a pain in my ass” you chuckle softly

“Its been lovely hearing from you though Dean. But I really should go to sleep now. Sorry”

“Its ok. I should get some shut eye too” you smile down the phone softly “I’ll see you around Kat” you nod at his statement

“I hope so. Goodnight”

“Night”. Click off. You place your phone down on the side cabinet. Rubbing your hand over your face before settling down underneath the covers. 

[fizzzyz]

Mandela Calamity

Volume 1 part 2 of my tmc au :]

It’s kinda slow in some parts and I’m still working on my writing so critique is appreciated as long as it isn’t rude!

CW: I don’t think there are any warnings for this part? Tell me if I should add some but I dunno

How long has it been now? It feels like an endless episode of misery, a surreal nightmare that tears through your heart. It felt like as if decades had passed, but it also felt like yesterday. Will it ever end? I don’t even feel like myself anymore. Whoever I used to be is long gone in the past. A past I crave to return to. To the happy days. Days when we spent every moment together. And all of that got swept away from us. Snatched by something twisted and sinister, finding pleasure in our agony. I can’t stand being away from you. Why do I even keep fighting, knowing I’ll never see you again?

Yet every day I pray; I pray and hope for you to appear in the doorway, the doorway I stare into for hours per day. I pray for the impossible. It’s not fair. It’s not fair. It’s not fair. I see your face everywhere, but you aren’t there. I feel your presence anywhere I go, is this you? Or is it only my desperate mind losing its grasp on reality? I’m losing my faith in everything, my family, my friends, myself, God. It’s not fair. Please come back to me. My chest is a gaping hole without you. I don’t feel human anymore. It’s not fair. It’s not fair. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. It's not fair. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. Please come back to me. Please come back to me.

Marilyn woke up and quickly sat up, her heart racing and breath heavy. She felt like a dead frozen corpse yet sweat was still running from her face. She glared into the nothingness of the plain white wall in front of her. It took a while for her to process where she was and what had happened. Everything felt completely alien to her for a short while. She slowly began to calm down and her heart started returning to a more normal pace.

“Good morning, Mary.” Mary heard her sister say from across the room, sitting in a sofa and reading a news article. “Another nightmare I suppose?” Anna continued as she turned the page of her newspaper. Mary looked at her before looking away again. She couldn’t really remember anything. All she could remember from her dream was a blurry image of her daughter. Just like all of the other dreams. Nothing out of the ordinary. At least of what she knew. As soon as she wakes up all memories of her dreams vanish every time.

“I guess.” She muttered and threw the blanket to the side as she got out of bed. She didn’t feel so happy about waking up in a motel room right now, especially in Mandela County. She’d prefer to be in her own house and own bed. But she had to do all of this for her sister. Her eyes shifted to the nightstand where the digital clock stood, 9:13, later than she thought it was. It was a pretty long day yesterday and it took what felt like eternity to fall asleep. She would’ve felt like a wreck if she woke up earlier.

She still felt exhausted from all of her feelings, which seemed to bite harder now when she was in the place she swore to never come back to. “I got breakfast for you, when you’re done, we’re going to the town center …would be good if I found a job right away.” Anna noted and continued looking through her newspaper she had been reading. Mary looked over to her and saw a tray with a sandwich and coffee standing on the table next to Anna. She didn’t feel hungry, but she still had to eat. Letting out a sigh, she wandered over to the table, took a seat and grabbed her sandwich. It looked squished and old, like as if it had been in a freezer for two weeks. She took a bite out of it despite her lack of appetite, it didn’t taste very good, and it was pretty chewy.

Anna stood outside the motel on the parking lot beside her car, waiting for Marilyn to finish and come down. It took a good while. Normally Anna was always the late one, but their roles were reversed now. Anna glanced over the horizon. The morning sun had risen, and the sky was a nice pastel blue with only a few clouds to be seen. The breeze felt nice, it was neither too cold nor too warm. Just like what any other early September day felt like, except for the rainy days. Finally, after about 8 minutes Marilyn came rushing out of the motel to Anna in the parking lot. She seemed frustrated and tired.

Anna sighed and unlocked the car “Took you long enough.”. Both of them got into the car and put their seatbelts on in a hurry. “Says the one who’s always late.” Mary replied after she got in. Anna chuckled and smiled. “Not this time though!” She started the car and the old engine started running. She drove out of the parking lot and out on the road, on their way to the town center. It was only a 5-minute drive as the town wasn’t very big. Anna searched for a good parking lot, which wasn’t too hard to find either. She quickly parked the car and got out of it in a rush like an excited child. Mary, on the other hand, was in no hurry at all, she didn’t understand why Anna was rushing everything.

“Are you stressed?” She questioned while getting out of the car and slamming the door shut. “No, I just really want to get a job as soon as possible.” Anna replied and stepped onto the sidewalk. “Well, geez you don’t need to rush, it’s not like the jobs won’t be there tomorrow as well. And I mean, we have almost the whole day on us!” Mary said, hoping it would calm Anna’s mind, for both of their sakes. “Yeah yeah, whatever.” Anna walked at a fast pace anyway, completely ignoring Mary’s advice. Mary sighed as they walked together on the sidewalk. She had a feeling this day wasn’t going to be a calm and peaceful one.

They had been in 2 stores already, but no job so far. They either didn’t need it, or Anna just didn’t meet the requirements. It only made her stress worse, which also made Mary feel stressed. “Mary, look at this sign!” Anna shouted as she had stopped in front of a sign tilted against a lamp post. Mary glanced over at her, and then walked over to where she was standing near the sign. Open 9-19, looking for part-time workers. Golden oddities market. There was an arrow underneath the text, pointing towards the road to their right. It wasn’t a store Mary recognized, it was a long time since she last was here, but she still remembered most of the stores.

“Come on!” Anna grabbed Mary’s hand and without warning she pulled her with her down the road the said store was. Mary almost fell over as she did and stumbled quickly across the road to keep up. “Anna!!” Mary yelled as she kept pulling and dragging. “I can walk by myself you know!” Anna finally let go of Mary’s hand when they had reached the shop. There was a sign above it, Golden oddities market, gems you can’t find anywhere else. There were two big windows on each side of the entrance, and a bunch of products stood as displays in them. Anna pushed the door open, and a bell rang as she entered. Mary went in after her, her eyes shifting at every strange thing she could see in there. Weird sculptures, games she had never heard of, pirated VHS movies, old Gameboys, weird equipment for cameras and such, and way more odd stuff you don’t normally see in stores filled the shelves. The store wasn’t very big, but it still had so much stuff, it almost made her feel dizzy.

She noticed her sister had already started making her way towards the cashier counter, and she hurried over to her. An old man, probably in his 60s, sat behind the counter solving a crossword. He had long beautiful gray hair, it looked like strands of silver as it glittered in the light. He was wearing a red cap with a retro label and had a fit looking like it was taken straight out of the 80s. His clothes were colorful and pretty, but didn’t fit that well together. There was another counter against the wall behind the counter, where he seemed to have a tiny workshop with tools and such. A dog, a really old German shepherd, was sleeping on a big and comfy red dog bed that was placed on the workshop counter, which also had a little ramp that led up to it.

“Excuse me?” Anna said and stepped a little closer to the counter. The old man looked up and put down the pen he was holding. “I’m looking for a job, and I saw the sign you had put up.” She explained, as she hoped that she would get it. The old man looked at her for a while before he replied. “You seem older than the usual, mostly teens come here to work for the summer. But that’s no problem.” He said and sat up straight. “Is this… shop new here? I haven’t seen it before, from what I remember.” Marilyn asked as she stood next to Anna. The old man looked at Mary as if she said she saw aliens, he seemed almost offended. “New? I’ve owned this store since I had color in my hair!”

Mary felt a little embarrassed, she didn’t want this to be her first impression if Anna was going to work here. “Oh- I’m so sorry, I haven’t been here in so long.” “You don’t live here?” He asked as he folded the newspaper, he was doing his crossword on. “We’re from Bythorne, we used to live here about 10 years ago.” Anna replied and forced a smile, she didn’t have time for small talk, she just wanted this job already.

The man leaned back in his chair and nodded. “Hmph, I’ve owned this store for about 25 years. But what brings you back to your hometown?” Anna looked at Mary for a short moment before she looked back at the man. “I just need a fresh start with a new job. Nothing special.” She replied. “About the job?” She continued, already feeling a little frustrated because of her stress. The man nodded and sat up straight again as he opened a drawer behind the counter. “This week you can come in Thursday, and you might as well stick for Friday and Saturday if you want a better paycheck. With shifts for about 3-4 hours.” He said and looked through the drawer he had pulled out. “Is there any chance I can take fulltime instead? I’m willing to work as much as possible.” Anna asked eagerly as she hoped he would let her have it.

The man stopped looking through the drawer and looked up at Anna. “Fulltime, eh? That’s a first.” He mumbled and pulled out a sheet of paper from the drawer, along with a pen. Anna nodded as she held her hands together and could barely stand still. “I…, ma’am, you’d make more money working fulltime somewhere else. There’s not much you can do here fulltime.” Anna quickly stepped closer to the counter and held her hands in front of herself in a begging way “Please, I really need a job and I’m not qualified anywhere else.”

The man glared at her for a brief moment, unsure what to reply. “…I suppose it could work, I could use some more help cleaning and restocking the shelves sometimes, I’m getting pretty old.” He said and scratched the back of his neck. It almost looked like as if he felt bad for her. Marilyn didn’t understand why it was so urgent for Anna and why she couldn’t carefully spend her time finding a more proper job. She hadn’t even actually moved into the house yet, they were just sleeping in a motel for now. It all made her question her actions and decisions more and more, it didn’t make sense, something was definitely going on.

“Are you sure, Anna?” Mary asked, concerned for her. “Yes.” Anna replied, almost in a harsh way. Mary sighed and crossed her arms. The man held out the pen he had gotten to Anna, waiting for her to grab it. “You can sign here, and then the job is yours.” Anna took the pen and quickly signed her name on the sheet of paper in front of her. She seemed so careless about everything, she didn’t even spend a second looking at the policies and agreements on the paper.

“The name is Kevin by the way, yours?” The man asked and smiled as he took the paper when Anna was done signing. “Annette Allen, Anna for short, and this is my younger sister Marilyn.” She said and nodded at Mary. “Marilyn Allen?” Kevin said “I think I recognize your name from your news articles. They’re really interesting.” He uttered and put the pen back into the drawer it originally came from. Mary was shocked to hear that. She was a journalist, but she wasn’t famous of any kind. To hear someone recognize her and her work made her feel flattered. “Oh? Well- thank you!” She said and smiled.

“So, when can I start working?” Anna asked, still seeming like she was stressed out. Kevin looked to his left at a calendar on the wall, and then returned his sight to Anna. “Hmmm… how about tomorrow?” Anna smiled and nodded, she seemed more relieved and happier, now when she finally got what she wanted. Mary was still confused about her behavior. She couldn’t possibly make enough money out of this job to fix her house, it would take centuries. “Well… thank you so much, sir! See you tomorrow.” Anna said as she grew a big smile on her face and waved at Kevin, before grabbing Mary’s hand and dragging her out of there. “See ya!” Kevin replied and smiled back, returning to his crossword. Mary pulled away her hand from Anna and walked after her. Anna always used to grab and pull her ever since they were kids, but she still got annoyed by it.

(dw the og characters will show up soon..)

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Shark arc winter mermaid sister and blake wake up together in bed.

Anna: *Snoring*

Blake: *Glaring at winter, in Anna's bed*

Winter: *Glaring at blake, also in Anna's bed*

Blake: *whispering* I saw her first!

Winter: *whispering* She deserves someone her own age!

Jaune: She Needs her sleep. Alone.

Blake: What are you doing! Your going to wake her up!

Jaune: No I won't, because Anna sleeps like a log. Now unless she invited you into her bed, I suggest you leave for your own good.

Winter: Why?

Jaune: Well, when she wakes up she always does laps around her pool, and if you wake up with her she drags you into it, because "What better way to wash off the night's grasp than with a cool splash of reality~"

Blake: I'm amazed at how well you can mimic her.

Winter: ... Could I commission -

Jaune: I'm not saying sexy things in my sister's voice no matter how much-

Winter: Would this cover it?

Jaune: ... Well I'm going to get started on this! You two have a nice morning! HEY GRAINS! IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP! *He sprints out of the room*

Anna: Hmm ... Wha? JAune! You know I hate that Nickname!

Anna: Ugh. Well, good morning you both ... Hrm. I partook in too much of our Winery's best last night. I must've forgot to water it down.

Anna: ... Why have you joined me in bed? Were you having difficulty sleeping?

Winter: ... Yes. Field work is extremely stressful and I was informed that you were quite comfortable to rest with?

Blake: And I ... was feeling ... Nostalgic?

Anna: Hm.

Anna: Well that makes sense~

W+B: 'Thank the Arc Denseness'

Anna: Now it's time to start the day!

With Remarkable strength, Anna threw Blake and Winter into the pool, Diving in after them.

The water was pretty FUCKING cold.

~A Hour Later~

Winter: *Wrapped in a blanket, Teeth chattering, full of regret* 'And I though Home was c-cold'

Blake: *Blow drying everything, also full of regret* 'I miss the Menagerie Beaches ...'

Anna: *Changing her clothes* Well! That was the best morning swim I've had in years~ I hope you join me more often in the future~

Blake: Absolutely!

Winter: I think now that I have a better idea as to what it entails, I will find it more enjoyable!

[cljordan-imperium]

Happy WBW! Does something like soul mates or fated relationships exist in your world? Are there any beliefs about this?

Hi sweets!!

Thanks for this question 💜

In all my fantasy worlds, yes. How those come about is varied. Even within @theimperiumchronicles how mated/fated/predestined couples find one another is not consistent because it is dependent on the type of being. So Talon, who is a demigod did not even realize that Delilah was his mate till they slept together (spoiler) but Adriel (who is an Angel) could tell with Anna VERY quickly (spoiler). Gail and Karlen found one another through dreams. No two are exactly alike, but when one finds the one the gods and Fates have ordained, there is no doubt.

In @magical-mistakes-vm there was a prophecy that's already been revealed, and how Mahala fits into it is starting to be shown and will continue to be. There is a future scene that removes all doubt she is who Vollrath was prophesied to be with.

In @devil-in-the-details-ay it will be revealed later that the Fates WERE involved somewhat in the forced marriage of Astaroth and Yara. However, the why is very important and explains a lot. Both Yara and Astaroth already have suspicions that they are because of how well suited they are to one another.

@princess-of-thieves-id nothing happens without the Fates or deities causing it. Inara and Diyan were both running from an arranged marriage to one another, and now they're on the same boat and associated through Arik. Things will get more complicated later as well when feelings develop between them. You cannot escape fate.

@tapperhet-em there are some changes I've made from the original concept but there is still magic in this story. A royal Princess and a soldier destined to be together and change an entire kingdom. They don't know it yet but thus was foretold. What four friends have set out to do by protecting Meeri, trying to find out who set her up, and who really helped her uncle will fulfill an ancient prophecy.

@bombsbodyguardsbroken - while this is set in our reality just with magic. There comes a point where fated love is talked about. It is real, but rare.