#AND HE GREW A STACHE

[eljeebee]

It was Penrose's turn to cook for breakfast. She was deep in thought on how to confront Bernie about what she heard from Julie.

"As I was saying," Penrose said, wiping her mouth with a tissue, "we'll have to be up tomorrow at three. The Queen Catarina will pick us up in Ohan'ali Town."

"That's a bit early, no?" Margaux asked.

"It is early, but the weather forecast won't permit us to travel a little later. We'll get stuck here tomorrow with another monsoon," Bernie added. "That's why we'll leave at three in the morning. We'll be avoiding the storms."

"My goodness, Mousse," Julie said as she watched her brother took the plastic chair when he got his plate of breakfast. "Your moustache grew overnight."

Seamus only nodded, taking a bite from his plate.

"I think it looks neat," she noted, giving him a small smile.

He sighed, before turning to his sister. "Thanks, Julie. But I don't think I'm going to keep it."

Margaux looked at his son. "Darling, it looks good on you, don't feel bad."

"Thank you, Mummy," Seamus gave her a smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "But it feels wrong. I don't know. This isn't what it Pop looks like."

Julie reached and squeezed his arm. "It does look good on you, but if you don't feel it, then you don't have to keep it."

His shoulder sagged slightly. He smiled, this time it's genuine.

previous | next

[3416]

everyone’s a hater of mitch’s 4 light ginger hairs on his face but i’m here to hype it up! he shaves and his face looks CLEAN. not one fckn spot. like a BABY. not many men can say the same! put some respect of the lil hairs okay? mitch get behind ME 🫵👫

flksdjflkdsjfklsdjfksdlfjlkJKLFSJFKLS. no fr.. i love him no matter what he does to his face tbh... growing the hair or not.. but there is some instinct that kicks in when he's growing it out and suddenly i am a cat who so badly wants to rub cheeks with him . dont ask

[princelancey]

He's doing his best Guenther impression

[pikslasrce]

thinking abt that one tag someone left under one of my placebo posts claiming that brian growing a mustache is the "saddest of twink deaths"....

[allseeinganalyst]

Domestic Vegeta is so hilarious to me, he’s so proud of the change to his appearance, and his comments also imply he was was proud of GROWING the moustache and how long did Bulma put up with him talking about facial hair in the pre-growth and pre-shaving parts of his life? 😂😂😂😂😂

[dreamsbeyond]

“OH WOWEE my firsts tours!!”

-

I came across a Dethklok tour buss photo on Pinterest and I couldn’t help but think of Toki. I’m connecting with him in a spiritual level and I just needed to practice something on digital so I could relax a bit. I ended up tearing up and thinking how would he be with Dethklok during his first tour.

Taking photos, keeping memories, I like to think that he grew his stache out during his first one. I also like to think he followed with growing out his hair as the tours continued..perhaps to be like Skwisgaar or have a forever memento of his growth as a person. Sure his band mates aren’t perfect, but he’ll forever be greatful to ever be recruited. He was saved and he’ll cherish that forever.

Sorry I’m all mushy and it’s REALLY late but, just wanted to yap about Dethklok,. It’s truly helping me ♡ I hope you enjoy this fanart of young Toki!

I’m wanting to make more fanart so stay tuned apologies I have been less active here.

[chxrryhansen]

౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ Cherry’s Concepts 4/50

Character; Lloyd Hansen

Kink; Man handling

Dialogue; “Be a good girl and open wide.”

Requested by; Lara! <3

As always, this blog contains 18+ content only, your media consumption is your own responsibility, all dark content will be labled as such. Please read at your own risk.

₊♡₊˚ 🍒・₊✧

You already know Lloyd hasn’t had a good day at work when you hear the front door to your shared penthouse slam shut. Your heart rate instantly spiking upon his entrance.

You hated when he was angry, he always seemed to take out his stress and aggression on you, which you didn’t mind at first of course, but after a while being punished for something you didn’t do began to take a toll.

Lloyd would protect you from everything the world had to offer, except himself. As you sat on the couch you heard him slam his keys down against the bench and storm towards the living room.

He rounded the corner, his expensive white pants drew your attention in an instant making his thick muscular thighs look incredible. His black tight polo showed off his bulging muscles and broad shoulders, his hair was slicked back as always , his 90s porn stache making your knees feel weak. You stood up slowly and spoke softly

“Hey baby, how was your da-“

Your words cut off as Lloyd stormed towards you, holding your throat in a tight grip while he bent you over the couch. Before you could even respond he pulled your soaked panties down to your thighs, his fingers roughly running back and forth in between your pussy lips before taking his cock out of his boxers, rubbing his thick swollen tip against your entrance.

His hand travelled from your throat to hold your mouth shut, silencing you as he roughly pushed his fat cock inside of you, bottoming out in one thrust. You screamed out behind his hand, your pussy clenching around his thick shaft. He groaned in your ear mumbling a low “Shut your mouth.”

His hips pounding against your ass, sure to leave bruises. His heavy balls slapping your clit while his hands moved to grip your waist, holding you still while he fucks his cock deeper into your tight hole. “F-fuck Lloyd.. Oh god i can’t take it, i can’t take it, Your so big.” you moaned writhing on his dick.

“Fuckin’ whore actin’ like you don’t love this fat cock tearing your pussy apart.” he roared.

He pulled out spinning you around and forcing you onto your knees “m’ gonna cum in your mouth, want you t’ swallow my fuckin’ kids you fuckin’ whore.” he growled as he jerked his dick off over your face.

“Be a good girl and open wide.” he snarled while he grabbed the back of your head, tilting your face upwards ensuring you stared into his cold blues.

Your lips parted as he shoved his cock down your throat, you gagged and sputtered around his length as he groaned, his cum spurting in thick ropes down your throat.

The taste of his salty pleasure running down into your belly as you swallowed his load yet he kept his member warm in your throat, not wanting to pull out just yet. His cock grew flaccid in your mouth as he wiped your tears with his thumb.

You knew Lloyd wasn’t the right man for you, too aggressive, volatile, savage… but god did you wish he was. You knew you would need to find a way to leave him one day, this life wasn’t made for you. You’d be lying if you said it’d be easy. You knew it would only be a matter of time.

That man would cross hell, heaven and earth before he gave up on you.

[igglemouse]

Mister Maxwel

For @ethicaltreatmentofcowplants Simply Lilac BC!

Name: Mister Maxwell. Yes, that means if you call him Mr. Maxwell you'll be saying his full name.

Age Group: Young Adult

Pronouns: He/ Him

Orientation: Heterosexual

Hometown: Chestnut Ridge

Occupation: Unemployed just living life but one day he'll be a big action start making millions.

Skills: Is flexing a skill? Otherwise, no skills at all!

Traits: Goofball, Party Animal, Self- Assured.

Aspiration: He wants to experience as many parties as possible. Is this a party?!?

Life State: A complete hunk.

Likes: Acting, Bowling, Fitness, and photography...alright that last one means he likes being in pictures as well as taking them.

Dislikes: Painting, he just doesn't understand it.

Gifts: He'd give flowers of course, he's not very original.

In Depth: Alright alright alright, it's time for me to take over and speak for myself. Actually, just scroll back up and check the pictures. Better yet, check the pecs, the biceps, and most importantly, the stache.

Done? If not, you can scroll back up and look at the pictures again. Do you feel it, the confidence? Of course you do.

I guess I'm supposed to put something about me here? I was born in a boring town, Chestnut Ridge, so I grew up wanting to get out of there and so spent most of my life going between Del Sol and San Myshuno. Usually I hit the gym in the day then find a party at night and I usually leave with a woman on my arm. So I'm not a one woman man but maybe that's what I need? I'm going to be a star one day after all!

Watcher

Are you comfortable with your pixel person:

Flirting with other contestants? YES

WooHooing other contestants? YES

Flirting with/and or woohooing NPCs?  YES

Flirting with the host?  YES

Changes to traits via gameplay prompts? YES

(Humans Only) Becoming an occult?  YES

[snorky]

Verbatim

Hey y’all! I’m posting another story today as well because I wrote the last story at the same time I wrote this one. I saw a particular image of Swayman with his November mustache, and I must say it suits him well (maybe I just like mustaches). The confidence he exuded at the 11/11 Bruins v. Canadiens game was *chefs kiss* and I loved it. Title inspired by the song "Verbatim" by Mother Mother, mostly the intro guitar part. I hope you all enjoy this fic, and take care of yourself!

Pairing: Jeremy Swayman x F!Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: None

—

—

The chilly, familiar, cold Boston air came rolling in, making the apartment seem much more frigid than it had to be. Although it was her favorite time of the year, when alluring holiday lights were hung on street lamp posts, and the scent of baked goods seemed to linger around, the cold air was rather uninviting compared to the other joys of winter.

It reminded her of sweet childhood, full of color and happiness and innocence in a swirl of hot cocoa, dashes of marshmallows and with whipped cream on the top. As she grew into adulthood, that childhood never seemed to go away since she met Jeremy.

She shared an apartment with Jeremy, her friend since university, and it helped cut some costs off of the heart-issue-inducing price of rent in the area, although to compromise, she wanted to help with groceries and chores as much as she could.

“Hey, Jeremy—” She closed the door behind her with her foot, her hands occupied with the task of carrying paper grocery bags. “Let me know if we need any winter supplies.”

He was always a friend, first. He was someone she cared about much more than just someone she lived with and split rent. They both inspired each other to grow better, never putting one or the other down, but always uplifting each other.

Turning around the corner, he stood in the kitchen with his back turned to her, cooking up a simple lunch for the both of them. “I’ll let you know, but I don’t think Boston winter is going to be too rough this year.”

“They say that every year, until one day in the middle of winter, we suddenly get a foot of snow,” she sighed.

He turned around, placing the sandwiches down on the counter, and helped her with some of the groceries. She looked up at him and became startled, “Jeez, Swayman—” Her arms quickly grabbed the groceries that she had almost dropped. “What did you do?”

“Oh, yeah,” he chuckled. A dopey smile was plastered on his face. “Forgot to tell you that I was keeping the ‘stache for ‘Movember’ and I’m surprised that you just noticed it now.”

She felt slight embarrassment in not noticing, but it wasn’t every day that she stared at his face constantly, at least, she thought. “Well,” she paused before speaking again. “You know what, yeah.”

Grabbing the bags of produce and vegetables, she put them in a colander and began to rinse them in the sink as he put the other foods into the refrigerator. The thought of him having a mustache was new to her, especially since he was either clean-shaven or had a slight scruff. Taking a peek at him, she observed it, settling down on the idea that it wasn’t too bad.

“Do I have something on my face?” He laughed. Noticing her flustered expression, he gave her a slight smirk. “Ohh.” Closing the fridge behind him, he walked slightly closer to her. “It’s the mustache isn’t it?”

She didn’t have any romantic feelings for him on the surface, but it was evident that there was a live wire spitting sparks into the air between them.

The late weeknights when it was Jeremy’s rest days, spent on the couch with her, watching their favorite TV show with a bowl of Chipotle. Or the times when she made post-game dinners for him, seeing the genuine smile in his eyes when he looked at her.

It made her do a double-take when thinking about him, and she tried so hard to not let it get to her. For Pete’s sake, he was her friend and roommate for years. And it’d be so, wrong, in many more ways she could explain, yet it was beyond easy to fall for him.

Looking her up and down, he noticed the heat that seemed to drift to her face and neck. “Definitely the ‘stache,” he laughed as he took a step back from her, grabbing his sandwich from the counter and walking to the stools on the island counter. 

Oh, damn him. He knew the effect he had on her and she noticed it, but it felt like a jumble of mixed signals. Did he like her? Was he just teasing her? It was a whirlwind of mixed feelings and unsteady ground.

She brushed her feelings aside and grabbed one of the two sandwiches that he had made for the both of them and started to eat it, enjoying how pleasant it tasted. “This tastes pretty good,” she hummed.

“Thanks,” he responded, continuing to eat. “Tried out a new recipe.”

They both continued to eat in silence together, across the kitchen island from each other, the distance separating them. Awkward tension hung in the air as her feelings about him were slightly revealed, but not enough so that he knew something was definite. He moved his gaze from his sandwich to her, observing her like a hawk.

“I’ll do dishes, go relax after you finish your food.” He wiped his mouth with a napkin.

“Why?” she asked. It confused her as to why he wanted her to relax, especially out of the blue. “What’d you do?”

“You got the groceries and I think that you should just rest.” He smiled.

She hummed in response, content with the idea of relaxing on the couch after running some errands. “Thanks,”

Finishing up their sandwiches, Jeremy grabbed both of their plates and placed them in the dishwasher as she went out to the living room. Laying face-down on the couch, she let out a long exhale, relaxing her muscles and body.

“Long day?”

“Your mustache is unbearable,” she groaned.

He laughed at her, “I think you like it.” Crouching down to be at eye-level with her, he paused before he spoke softly, “Tell me what’s wrong,”

She turned her head to look at him, his face drawn with light concern. “What?”

“I can see it, you have something you want to say. And it’s not about my facial hair,”

Time seemed to slow as they remained in silence looking at each other. He searched her eyes for an answer to her silence. Was it in fear? Discomfort? Annoyance?

She held her pinky up to him, a symbol of keeping a promise. “Promise to continue helping me pay the rent?”

Jeremy let out a small laugh, considering how silly the request seemed, but at the same time, an odd feeling sunk within him when she said that. “Promise.” He wrapped his pinky finger around hers tightly.

Releasing a breath she didn’t know that she was holding, she buried her face into the couch, hiding from his gaze that he kept on her. “I think I like you,” she mumbled. Her face was hot with embarrassment, a mixture of fear and shame bubbling inside of her.

“Well I mean,” he paused briefly, “I hope you do, we split rent and live with each other twenty-four-seven if I’m not on road trips.”

“No—”

“Okay, I know what you mean, I was just messing with you.” He smiled. “Please look at me,”

She picked her head up off of the couch slowly, turning to look at him, he remained smiling, and it looked sweeter than before. He had the softest, precious-happy look in his eyes, the one that she’d see after a game win, but better.

His cheeks were dusted with a gentle pink tint, his face soft. “I like you as well. In the way of me wanting us to be more than friends,”

Smiling at him, she gently cupped his face, her thumb running over his cheek. It was the answer that she had preferred to hear from him, but it seemed better than she had initially thought, and it was relieving. Her own cheeks were a rosy shade, flustered and feeling all sorts of fuzziness.

“Let’s go out and grab dinner later this evening, my treat,”

“I’m sleepy though,” she sighed.

“You need a midday nap?” He asked as he stood up. “Cause if so, I’m grabbing some blankets and joining.” He let out an obnoxiously loud yawn, which she laughed at, as he walked away to grab the blankets from the closet.

This was routine for them from time to time since they were close, but it was slightly different now, knowing that they both felt like they were more than friends. When he came back, he gave her a few blankets and then laid on the couch beside her, head in her lap.

“We’re going on a date tonight, so let’s get some rest.” He let out another yawn, which in turn, caused her to yawn.

“What? A date?”

“The best for the best,”

She smiled softly at him, adoring his genuineness. Her hand drifted to his hair, playing with it gently as he drifted off to sleep, and shortly after, she started to fall asleep as well, peacefully in his presence, together.

[xmimikyuusx]

I'm here on my soapbox in defense of the teenaged girls who love yaoi to trans men pipeline get ready. I'm speaking for the heart so excuse me if I sound silly

(If t/rfs see this post, before touching it: consider choking on my nuts)

Growing up, especially in adolescence, I (and probably most people perceived as women around that age) struggled not only with feeling objectified by other people and society at large, but simultaneously, living with a strange relationship to wanting to feel attractive to others. It had been ingrained in me that because I wasn't performing my agab hard enough (to the impossible standard that was every piece of media about women) that I was undesirable. In a very weird way, that is; you're an undesirable woman because you're ugly, you're fat, you can't afford makeup or fancy clothes and wearing them makes you feel like shit. However, if all else failed, you could still be "used" by someone. Maybe I would never be loved, but at least, even if it was hell, someone would find a "use" for me as a sexual object, if I performed feminity just enough.

It all sounded awful. Really, really awful. I remember every time someone would hit on me, would oggle my body, it was humiliating. Even being bisexual, I felt this awful ache in any relationship I was in where I was someone's handbag, I was something for them to have. But at least someone wanted me.

Then, I grew up, and I transitioned. And a whole new world of getting shit on awakens. Because now, I'm nowhere near performing feminity enough. I'm blatantly undesirable. The disgust that comes for trans men's bodies, especially early in transition, is night and day. You're not masculine enough, you're not feminine enough, you're an ugly girl who thinks they can get away from it all if you change your pronouns, which makes you even more pathetic and disgusting in the eyes of people who see you as an object to be desired.

And being told, over and over, that the changes you wanted, the neck hair and the patchy stache and the body hair and the smell of your own sweat that gets stronger as your voice drops, the things that make you happy, they're disgusting, it's another layer of hell after you grew up going through the last five. You felt rejected and outcast before, but now you're something that people don't even want to use, unless they can make you go back to being a woman.

No man looks like you. Except. In fucking yaoi. You get short, vaguely feminine men, who are desired in a positive way. You see men who are allowed to cry and be emotional, and it's seen as a good thing. You see men who can be an equal to their partner, that even if they're short, they're not as strong as other men, they struggled with being taken seriously or are even hurt by people who see them as something that can be used, but they get their happy ending. He gets comfort and love for someone who sees his feminity and finds him attractive without saying these unchagable attributes negate his status as a man. You see this man, who feels like you, being loved, and being able to love, and it's life changing.

You can be a man even if you're feminine. Even if you're short. Even if you couldn't win in a fight if someone attacked you. I'm not saying trans men are always all of these things, but fuck, for me, seeing representation for short effeminate men being loved and valued without being maliciously feminized is fucking impossible outside of gay manga. It helped me so much reading theaw things, seeing what bits of myself I could and knowing that if other people were writing and drawing this, maybe I could be worthy of love, not despite my body, but including it.

I fucking love reading manga with effeminate gay men in it because it feels like me. If other media started giving us short gay men, I'd be more interested, but manga/yaoi has it as a damn staple. Representation is media is life changing. Seeing someone who looks like you when you feel like you're all alone is so fucking important.

If you're going to complain about trans men reading yaoi and wanting to become that, eat shit. I'll become whatever I want for whatever reason makes me happiest. This has made me happy, incredibly, very happy, and has been something I can bond over with other trans men and my partner. You can stay bitter and disgusted with me, and I'll be happy with the people who care about me for who I really am, because I'm frankly over worrying about how other people will react to my joy.

[willgrahamscock]

i feel like if hannibal grew out a beard, will would pretend to hate it: "why are you doing that?" "it's not fair that you grow such a good beard but never choose to have one" "it chafes my thighs" but fucking LOSE it once he shaved it off: "why did you do that." "the dogs are gonna hate it" "where'd my lumberjack go??"

My headcannon for Will is that he loves body hair, on himself and on Hannibal.

But he's never really seen Hannibal with a beard until he DOES, and he's like "It doesn't quite suit you" but can't stop looking at him. "You should let me giveyou a porn stache" Hannibal agrees just because he wants to spend time with him. Will sits in his lap and starts shaving him, grinning to himself. Pulling back and examining his silly work while Hannibal is giving him the biggest heart eyes, content just being there. After Will is done, he's holding Hannibal's chin turning his head side to side to examine the design he tells Hannibal

"You look like someone in a shitty porn DVD I would have jerked off to back in high school"

Hannibal keeps it.

[latoyalestrange]

something in common

s. sallow x f!reader

summary: sebastian accompanies you on your first trip to hogsmeade. after being attacked by a troll and confronted by rockwood and harlow in the three broomsticks, you decide to stay awhile for a butterbeer to wait for the two bitter henchmen to leave. one drink turns into two, then four, then...wait, how many did you have? and how did you end up dancing with him in the square? all you knew was you were having so. much. fun.

words: 1.2k

warnings: fluff, fifth year seb and mc pining, fluff, poor-upbringing!reader and seb, not edited!

think of the song they're dancing to as a kingdom dance from tangled vibe

being entirely new to the wizarding world, it was rare that you found something familiar to you about it. however, as you approached hogsmeade for the first time, it reminded you of the quaint village that raised you. it made you protect the village that much more when that troll attacked, and when ranrock's wizard henchmen so rudely interrupted your celebration.

apprehensive to leaving at first, you were thankful for sebastian, as he was a very effective distraction to the pressing situation. you found yourself unable to interrupt the flow of conversation, engulphed in his company. the butterbeer only added to your comfort, making your body warm from the inside out. the candlelight was dim, adding to the atmosphere.

"did you get the chance to stop by honeydukes yet?" he lowered the brim of his mug to reveal a perfect foam 'stache above his lip. you chuckled, but didn't mention it.

"no, not yet." a goofy smile remained on your face, making his cheeks flush. he panicked for a moment, then felt the foam dripping down the corners of his mouth and wiped it away with the sleeve of his robe.

"i ought to show you around, i could name a few sweets right now that would blow your little mind," he teased, trying to play his embarrassment off. you quirked your head to the side with intrigue.

"is that so?"

"it is so." you rolled your eyes, thoroughly amused with how serious he was. "how are you not impressed with all of this? i would've thought you would have at least a little culture shock, being from the city and all."

"to be honest, not much has changed from my regular life. well, other than the ancient-magic-weilding stuff. hogsmeade reminds me a lot of where i grew up."

"really? i always imagined you living in some big house with a butler or something."

"is that how you think all muggles live?" you were laughing into your words at his point and he couldn't help but join.

"well, no...yeah, i guess i did." your hand absentmindedly landed on his arm, sending electricity through him. in that moment he realized his new favorite thing to do was make you laugh, and he would do anything to make it happen.

"you're too much, sebastian. i think we've had too much." he laughed and followed your words, rising to his feet and holding out his hand for you to take.

"let's walk it off, shall we?" your eyes followed his arm all the way down to his hand before you hesitantly granted him your hand.

"we shall." like the gentleman he was, he led you out of the three broomsticks with your hand laced around his arm. once you pushed through the heavy wooden doors, you realized it was now dark outside, the street lamps blazing with a bright white fire to light up the area.

"honeydukes is this way, m'lady." he pulled you to one side and down the stone path.

"do us both a favor and never call me that again," you joked, making him clutch his stomach theatrically.

"harsh, y/n." you didn't bother responding as something had caught you attention in the distance. a man, conducting a floating band that way playing some of the most beautiful live music you'd ever heard. you gasped, starting to pull his towards the man.

"that's what makes you excited? the street performer?'

"hush, sebastian. i think i recognize that song." you were nearly dragging him along now as you approached the crowd. once you could see through them, you saw the twirling of multicolor fabric and beautiful bouncing curls. the look of utter adoration as you watched the women dance with their handsome partners around the square. "yeah...i know this dance. sebastian, we should join in." thinking you were joking, he started chuckling. once you flashed a glare his way, he settled down.

"i don't dance!" he honestly looked terrified at the suggestion.

"oh come on, sallow. it's just repeating the same for steps over and over. look, twirl, together, apart, lift. see?" he analyzed their movements, repeating what you had said in his mind.

"fi--" before he could finish, you had yanked him through the wall of spectators and out into the middle of the clearing. he took a split second to look around at all the people watching, but you didn't allow him to dwell on it, already starting to instruct him.

"remember what i said. you lead." he nodded, trying his very best to seem calm even though he was so close to combusting. merlin, your hands were all over him and the fast music had his head spinning.

twirl. his head was also literally spinning because he was twirling the two of you around as you let your head fall back, his strong arms supporting you.

together. he pulled you close, your faces now inches apart as your opposing hands joined between your bodies.

"not to bad for someone that doesn't dance." your breath was heavy, and he had to catch himself before his mind wandered to an inappropriate place.

"i might have had some practice," he mused, playing along.

"looks like we have more in common than you thought."

apart. you stretched your arms until they eventually seperated, and the two of you were dancing on your own, but still in orbit with the other. he mostly watched as you closed your eyes and let your body move to the music with a grace he'd never seen. your dress followed suit, floating around you as you spun. unbeknownst to you and your "friend", what the crowd saw was a young couple, and they thoroughly enjoyed their free-spirited nature. they started to clap along to the beat as it steadily quickened it's pace. the score cued for the next move, the one he was most anxious for.

lift. he offered his hand to you and quickly pulled you forward once your hand found his. realizing it was now or never, he firmly placed his hands on your hips and lifted you into the air, his eyes meeting yours as you floated above him. were you blushing? you couldn't tell. nor did you really care. his hands on your waist made your entire body feel like it was buzzing, that was all you could focus on in the moment. to your disappointment, he gently set you down on the opposite side of him like the other men and the song came to a rushing end. you instantly felt a weight lift off of your shoulders as you stood breathlessly before him, the crowd carrying on around you.

"remember this the next time i suggest something fun and you feel like refusing." he smiled as his hand found the back of his neck, fidgeting.

"okay, fine. that wasn't terrible, i guess."

"neither were you, dance partner." you playfully nudged his shoulder that was a few inches above your own.

"some people are just good at everything they try." you rolled your eyes once more.

"sure, sebastian."

reblog if you made it to the end!

[sketchedboba]

"A Green Queen" AU

Chapter III

The sun began to peak its face through the green hills. The citizens of the Mushroom kingdom were setting up their shops and food carts as they greeted each other at the start of a new day.

The Princess was up early, she wanted to get a bit of peace before tending to the problems and concerns of her citizens.

Peach headed down the hall, hesitantly moving forward as she heard a loud clang come from behind a set of large doors. She slowly pushed it open, only to see a silhouette in the quiet, dark room. "Mario?", She whispered.

She flicked the lights on to see a bulletin board full of photos pinned with red lines. Horror struck here face, it soon turned into annoyance as she saw a swaying Mario. He was crouched on the floor mumbling to himself as his body rocked back and forth.

"He's really gone. I figured out Bowser's flight patterns and if I just work out a way to infiltrate his castle, maybe I can see him? I've even made a Koopa disguised!"

Peach plopped down next to him and lifted his chin. "You need to sleep. I get you're worried but-"

"You don't... We've been apart a few times, but a year is different. Even with school, we stuck together. To have the first time we've ever separated for a YEAR and with that tyrant?! I don't even know where to begin with what that stupid Koopa has planned."

Mario stood up and looked at the bulletin board. A sigh left his lips as he began to mumble to himself.

Peach got up and brushed herself off, "You think I don't, but I do... I know how it feels to not be around someone who you care deeply for, but I can reassure you, if your brother decided to go with Bowser of all creatures.. he's braver than you give him credit for.."

"I'm not saying-"

"Would you have gone if the proposal was for you?"

"No, but-"

"Would you have looked for a solution that didn't require three armies?"

Mario opened his mouth to speak then dejectedly looked down, thinking, as his stroked his stache. "Ok... You may have a point there."

"Mhm.", She smiled. "You've been up all night thinking on how to rescue your brother, you haven't even considered that if he needed it, he'll call."

The small plumber turned back to the board and sighed, "then we just sit and wait?.."

"We'll see him at the end of the month, that was the agreement after all. I also made sure he knew that if he wanted to come back at any time, he could.", She answered. "Now, let's start the day. You really need to shave that stubble."

"Yeah... Yeah, I honestly don't know how it grew overnight, truly..", he pondered.

The two made their way out of the room. Mario giving one more glance at the board before closing the door.

'I'm sorry, Princess. But I just need to check on him..'

He pulled out a small picture of a desert land with a sphinx looming in the side of the frame.

Luigi groaned, sweat dripping down his temple as he tossed a bit in bed. The sling restricted his movement, but he gasped awake once an alarm he'd set up from last night began to blare in his ears.

He looked around while taking deep breaths. He was aware he wasn't in his room, but still gazed at it in shock.

Once he calmed down, he slowly reached over with his left hand and stopped the clock. A yawn left his lungs as he recollected all of what happened last night. Looking down at his arm, he cursed under his breath and swiftly moved the covers off of himself.

A set of clothes were left on his nightstand, next to his clock, and he rolled his eyes to the obvious seal stitched onto the shirt.

'He doesn't even wear his own mark, why do I have to- No, calm down Luigi! Just one issue at a time here..'

He would have to deal with it later. Instead, he went over to an unpacked suitcase and began to get a simple green button up shirt, some jeans and his long striped socks. Before heading to his bathroom he grabbed a towel he forgot to grab and some shampoo he didn't put in the cabinet.

Trying to hold everything in one arm was only half the challenge, he now had to figure out how to shower and change his sling without injury.

Words Bowser said before started flooding into his head.

"And if you had just listened, you wouldn't be needing that sling!"

'Sure, blame ME for wanting some space!'

Luigi's frustration grew as he closed his bathroom door and turned on the shower head. Despite him coming into the castle in his Peach disguise, he hadn't seen any bathrooms his size before. He set up the bottles and toothbrush cup as orderly as he could while letting the water run to a temperature he felt wasn't going to burn his skin.

He took a deep breath and started to remove his shirt with his free hand. Lifting and turning to get every bit of his body out of the clothing someone had dressed him in. A shiver trailed as he realized he was undressed and dressed without permission.

'Not now, let's not think about that now!', he thought. His body began shaking a bit, but halted once he finally freed himself from the shirt.

Looking in the mirror, he smiled a bit. The scars near his ribs had faded a bit more and like clockwork, a bit of stubble was growing in.

Getting the rest of it off was simple enough, and as he finished undressing, he stepped into the shower.

The King was in his throne room delegating with a clawful of his captains. He was signing some documents for new dark land residents and grumbled at some of the testimonies. Kamek entered the room, rather cheerfully.

"The Prince and his siblings are eating his breakfast, your highness. They've decided they'd like to sleep at the castle once we arrive and are in quite the destructive spirit this morning.", He hummed.

"Good, we'll be there shortly. Make sure they don't ruin the dining room once we get there. I don't want to see apple pie and steak all over the castle walls again."

"Y-Yes, your highness.."

"Where is the Queen?"

Kamek gulped. He was hoping to avoid talking about Luigi for a few more minutes, but it seemed the King wasn't holding back.

"He's still in his chamber, your highness. Would you like him to stay there?"

"No, have him eat after the children finish. When he's done eating, bring him to the discussion room. Since he wants to be involved, so badly, might as well put some pressure up his stupid as-"

A clash erupted from the large doors swinging open. In bounded Bowser Jr and Ludwig, who panted a bit while trying to stop him.

"Papa!"

"Junior?! Ludwig? What a-are you-"

"Kamek said you got a queen!", He roared excitedly. "Does that mean that Princess said yes?! I knew it!"

His tail was wagging as Ludwig tried to hush him, "Hey! He said not to tell!", He whispered.

But the little prince wasn't listening and stumped Ludwig's muzzle causing him to grumble a bit. "It's true, right?!"

Bowser sighed and nervously gave a smile, "Well... It's a bit complicated, Junior.."

"What?"

"Well you see...", Bowser started. He gestured a bit to Kamek for assistance.

"Uhm, the Queen might not be... What you expect, your highness. We can talk about it once we reach the castle.", Kamek answered.

The small Koopa grunted and stomped, "No! I want to see my new momma!"

Bowser sighed and glared at Kamek, he slowly lifted himself from his throne and headed down the stairs.

Ludwig puffed his chest up a bit but Bowser brought the two closer as he leveled with the kids. "You'll meet the Queen after you and your siblings get ready to leave for your stay at the castle. And Junior, it isn't the Princess, but I promise to explain everything when we land. Ok?"

Junior huffed, resting over Bowser's arm, defeated. "Fine.."

"And Ludwig, make sure he doesn't burn anything..."

"Already on it!", He nodded holding up his staff.

"Good!"

Bowser smiled and for a moment, two purred as they leaned their foreheads against the King's, Junior still wearing a scowl on his face.

"I promise we'll discuss this later.", He smiled. "Now get going. That's an order.."

Ludwig huffed a bit as he gently pushed himself and Bowser Jr towards the door. The two waved goodbye and muffled chatter faded as they headed out.

The King's smile faded away as his head quickly turned towards Kamek, enraged.

"You told the kids?!"

"T-They wondered why you had arrived so late! Lemmy suggested a cuddle pile in your quarters, but-"

"And you couldn't have told them anything else?"

"Sorry, your highness.."

Bowser rumbled, but let his anger subside. "Fine. But get the Queen ready. He can take his breakfast with him to the discussion room. He wants to be involved so badly, it's time he proves it."

Kamek nodded and sped off down the hall on his broomstick to get Luigi.

The co-plumber had gotten ready and felt refreshed after the long shower. He was drying his hair with his free hand near the end of the bed, and was trying to figure out how he'd get his shirt on.

His stomach grumbled for his attention and as he rubbed it a knock came from the door.

"May I come in, your majesty?"

"N-Not ye-", he paused. "Actually yes! It's all right."

Kamek creaked the door open, " Ah! It's good to know you're already getting dressed."

"Yeah.. I need some help getting this shirt on though. Do you think you could.."

"Say no more, your highness!" Kamek proclaimed proudly. As he levitated the shirt, his eyebrow was raised in curiosity, "pardon my intrusion, but these aren't the clothes the King picked out for you. It's quite nice, but as his Queen you should.."

"...I'm not HIS. I'm just THE Queen and if that's the case, then I think wearing my shirt should be fine.", Luigi retorted. He made a failed attempt to fold his arms.

"Right....", the MagiKoopa noted. "If your majesty wishes, I guess I can't retort.". He finished as he warped the shirt onto Luigi's body and went to get the aid kit he'd left in the room.

"As for today, you'll be eating breakfast with the King while going over recent rebellions in a meeting with the captain and general of the Koopa army. The Captain is quite violent and his General is just as much. He's pretty loyal too."

Luigi gulped and stood up, "I feel underdressed now.."

"Which is why I set out clothes for you, your majesty.", Kamek scolded. "We have time to get you changed!"

He thought about it a bit, but shook his head. "I-I think I'll be fine. Just in case though..". He reached for his cape that was resting on the handle of his bed frame, "I'll put this on.."

Kamek gave him a good look at and sighed, 'Oh please, great stars let this not be a mistake!'

In front of a large golden crested door, Luigi stood quivering. He could barely keep his plate of pancakes, eggs, and bacon still that Kamek had to take it in fear of wasting a good meal.

"Anytime now, your majesty..."

"W-What if this is just like last night? I called him an ass! H-He was acting like one, but maybe he hasn't calmed down? I'm not equipped for this? Could we maybe reschedule?! O-Or maybe-"

Kamek looked over at him with an annoyed expression, "Your majesty, I understand your.. concerns, but you bravely spoke your peace yesterday despite the.. repercussions. Not even his bravest soldiers dare talk back to the King without execut-"

"Execution?! I CURSED AT HIM! I COULD BE-".

Luigi was about to pass out.

"No, no! Nothing of the sort. You forget that what you have is something no soldier can compare with."

"Seeing how fast I can get out of here...?"

".....No, you're The Queen, your majesty..."

He already knew this fact, but still could believe it'd be any use to a tyrant. Many queens from his world were executed, whether it was their fault or not. The Kings always held the power and he refused to end up with his head on a pike.

Kamek opened the doors, not before handing Luigi back his plate. Once opened, a surge of light came through causing Luigi's eyes to wince from the exposure. His vision cleared and he gazed at the round table, the same Koopa emblem preserved in the marble, and sharp blacked stone claws digging into its surface. At the head sat the King with two Koopas on each side of him, their attention placed on the duo that were standing there.

Bowser looked unimpressed, his eyelids lowered as he gave Luigi an examination and grunted seeing the casual wear.

"Kind of you to finally join us, your highness." Said the one eyed Koopa.

Luigi nodded in response as he made his way over to a small chair next to Bowser. His footsteps and squeaky heels echoed with each step.

Bowser glanced down at him and took a breath before continuing to speak, "So you say there has been an outbreak in the city?"

"Yes your greatness, several of my soldiers have reported on the citizens disdain for the announcement of the new Queen. They're worried that the brother of Mario will doom your kingdom.", he explained.

"A few have even begun calling you a failed King on account that word got out about the wedding incident... We've captured several of the protestors, but they've begun organizing crimes and rallies, your grace.", The General ranted his fist slamming the table.

Kamek had taken his side by the King while Luigi was eating while his arm was shaking. He felt responsible for all of it and knew how hard change was. A pit sank in his stomach knowing how those expressing their concerns would be executed or tortured and he tried his hardest not to imagine or verbalize their screams of pain in his head.

The King could sense his discomfort, "Hmm... Well, with the damages to several properties, the terrorizing of my citizens, and conspiring against the crown... It would be suitable to punish those who don't agree with my decision. Wouldn't you say so, Luigi?"

Luigi gulped, he was both shocked and infuriated by his response. He knew Bowser was pushing another button in him and was starting to crack. A small smile started to form on his face, "No."

"No?"

"No", he repeated. "I don't think they should be punished for voicing their concerns. They have no idea who I am."

Bowser raised an eyebrow and pressed on, "Wouldn't that make you furious? It would be better to squash any doubt in your leadership."

"Of course that works for someone like you.."

"And what's THAT supposed to mean?!",Bowser snarled.

Luigi smirked, enjoying the upper hand. "A brute will act brutish, you haven't even considered giving your citizens closure on me being a new leader to them."

"I- uhm-", his jaw opened. The Captain looked a bit uneasy.

"I'm not finished.", He noted. "You only prove them right by imprisoning those telling you of how stupid of a choice it was to make your ENEMY an equal. But what do I know, I'm just your prisoner."

Luigi closed his eyes and did a one-sided shrug before lifting the fork to his mouth. The room stayed stunned as Bowser tried to find the words to respond. His Captain and General started to rethink their strategy before Bowser spoke.

".... Y-You.. Ugh!"

"Should we... Torture them.. or-"

Bowser sighed, he could feel a headache growing as he tried to think this over. He hadn't thought further on the situation and wanted to simply stop it before anything got out of hand, but realized only now that his decision was the cause of all of this.

"No! Not yet at least, give me a day to think about this. We will relocate the prisoners to the castle cells once we reach there. I'll make my decision once my meetings in Sarasaland are over. Get the chains ready for their departure and station your guards at each cell. Two guards to a prisoner."

"Yes, your highness!", The two nervously stated.

"Leave us be... You too, Kamek.."

"O-Of course.", He answered. The MagiKoopa gave Luigi a pat on the shoulder before heading out with the others.

"Are you trying to make a fool out of me?"

Luigi only gulped at the worried expression on his face and didn't dare look up from his plate. His chewing slowed as he tried to retain his confidence.

The doors slowly clasped closed.

Bowser slowly turned to the man, he had a claw on the table and lowered his head, almost two inches away from Luigi's ear.

His heated breath could be felt trickling the Queen's neck, "No, you do that enough for yourself.. Both last night and just now."

Bowser snarled as his claws scrapped the resin surface, long marks being made on the table. "It was you and your brother's plan that ruined my rep!"

"Someone with BRAINS would've seen that me in a dress wasn't your damned bride! For fuck's sake, I wore a MASK!", Luigi retorted. He stood up as he spoke, which caused the Koopa to slowly move his head back once he did. "Maybe get those eyes checked."

Bowser grumbled, "Oh yeah!? Well- fuck you!-"

'I was excited to finally be happy for once!'

"-You and your brother always pull some FUCKING trick to get YOUR way. You're both just as inconsiderate as I am!"

Luigi's mouth gaped open and he poked at the King's snout, "My brother is nothing like you! He is the most considerate and understanding guy I know!-"

'If I were as half the man as he is...'

"-You don't even!" Luigi paused. "You know what, no. I'm not going to go back and forth with you. What do you want?"

Bowser blinked. He was so ready to fire back at him, he'd forgotten what started the argument. Why was he fighting with someone beneath his authority.

"I...". His head lowered in defeat. He sighed and sat up again. "I.. wanted to know if you'd really want to give cLosURre to my kingdom. I, hadn't thought about...ugh."

Luigi looked at him confused by his confession, "You didn't think anyone would have a problem with it?"

"That's not it. I just, didn't... Actually that's exactly it..."

He rolled his eyes at the large Koopa as he ate more of the bacon. "I'd like to... It's only fair, since I'm their Queen now."

"Right..".

The two sat in the realization for a moment. The quiet deafened the room as the clinking from the fork and plate kept the silence from setting in.

"This is the first time you've had a civil conversation with me.", He noted.

"Don't get used to it, this was only the start of your duties."

"Sure", he chewed. "As if you'll let me do anything..."

"I gave you the opportunity to make a decision and all you did was question my choices! How can I let you do anything??"

"You ASKED for my opinion, not a decision. You had already thought of one, I merely gave my input on it.", He scoffed finishing up his eggs.

Bowser mumbled and mimicked him, but for some reason his tail was swaying. "That's enough out of you."

Standing up, he took Luigi's plate, "Get back to your chambers."

"I can handle the plate-"

"I heard you shuffling with it in your puny hand from outside. You could barely hold Lemmy with it."

'Lemmy?..'

"And whose fault is that?!"

"Will you let it go already!! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?! IT'LL FUCKING HEAL!"

Luigi flinched and took a deep breath, "Say your sorry and mean it."

"Mean it?", the Koopa snorted.

"Yes, say you're sorry for hurting me!"

"You expect me to surrender to-"

"Nevermind... I just want to lay down."

"This isn't on the level of some battle! JUST-", Luigi sat down, exhausted from screaming. His free hand covering his eyes and he sighed. It felt like arguing with his niece all over again and he didn't want to over exert himself.

Bowser gaped his mouth to say something else, but clenched it and nodded. "The soldiers will take you back."

"Yeah, yeah."

Through the corridor, Luigi was followed quite closely by two guards, stopping here and there to check out portraits hung on the walls. As he stepped into his room and shut the door, he plopped on his uninjured side and winced at the pain from the sudden jolt.

'All I wanted was..'

He didn't dare finish that thought, he knew what he wanted, but shouldn't have expected it from a dragon wannabe. He flopped onto his back, so he could brace himself upwards and started to the window. Looking out, he could see a few huts on some wetlands and noticed the drastic transition from soil to soot.

Bowser placed the plate in the sink and started to wash it. The Koopa beside him glanced up at him nervously, already working on a heavy load of dishes.

He didn't say anything, but he could tell his presence made them nervous, "You."

"M-Me, your highness?"

"No, the ceiling."

"Oh! Ok."

Bowser groaned, "Of course I meant you!"

"Sorry, your highness!", They squeaked.

"Ugh... Look, did you treat the Queen last night?"

The Koopa perked up, "Yes! H-He was a bit nervous about drinking the soup, but I-"

"I didn't ask for all of the details."

"Sorry.."

"Good. Now, did he.. seem like a fit ruler to you?"

The dish-washer slowly lowered their sponge and plate, thinking. "He.. didn't NOT seem like one."

"Hm... And did he ever yell any orders? Demand anything? What do you think of him as a Queen?"

The Koopa was stunned, eyes widened and was slowly inched away from the King in fear of the wrong answer.

"Well?", Bowser sneered.

"U-Um... He didn't yell, I think his orders were in reason... He asked me to taste the soup for poison. I'm not sure if h-he'll be a good Queen since I don't know what he's done for the kingdom yet..B-But as long as he keeps your kingdom strong. It should be fine?"

Bowser put the plate down and grabbed the Koopa with his claw. They yelled and quivered as he raised them up to his eye level.

"Are you saying he'd take my place?!"

"N-No! Not at all your highness! I-Im just saying you could use him to your advantage! He'll know.. um. Oh! About plans of attack against your kingdom o-or possibly the location of another superstar?!", They squeaked as their head was slowly retracting.

Bowser thought about it and grinned, he dropped the help and stomped off.

'And with him visiting home every month.. I could use the plans of the Mushroom kingdom to once and for all, crush Mario and take Peach! I'll have a proper wedding and Queen at my side!'

He chuckled at the thought and headed to his throne room.

The ship started to descend and near the entrance, the Koopa kids were excitedly ready to rampage through the castle and fill their rooms with treasures from their journey. Ludwig was carrying a few scrolls as Morton picked one up as it dropped.

"Why so many? Kamek said we didn't have to study spells this month.", He questioned. The kids turned their attention to him.

"I thought I'd help out more by digging into advanced magic! I want to take down that pesky plumber.", Ludwig answered. He placed what he had into his sack and took the one he dropped from his brother.

"I see no point in it, Bowser said we shouldn't interfere until-", Wendy noted.

"Until we're ready!", The group chimed in unison.

"It's never stopped us yet! Heck, even the Prince terrorized his first village before he was ready!", Roy added slickly.

"I could test out new explosives too!", Iggy popped in.

"Eh, I doubt-"

"KIDS!"

All of them looked at the stomping Koopa approaching, Kamek flying in tow. "You better not be planning on doing anything this time. Right?"

"Right..." Larry winked.

"I'm serious, the Queen is staying in the castle with you all, so I don't want trouble this time."

"What?! So Kamek wasn't lying?!"

"Ooh! Is she pretty?! Finally, another lady in the castle! Maybe we can-"

"Heeey! What's wrong with males?!"

Bowser sighed as the kids bickered, he roared for their attention and they flinched. "Look, you can ask him all the questions you want, I don't care. But no shenanigans, got it?"

"Yes sir!"

Morton stuck his tongue out at Wendy when Bowser mentioned a 'him' and she rolled her eyes.

"Shut it!", She whispered

Luigi made his way down the hall, panting a bit as he realized he wasn't able to pack everything so quickly. A few shirts began slipping out of the suitcases the guards were carrying. One had flown behind to pick up and catch what was slipping.

When he reached the group, he was out of breath.

"Took you long enough..", Bowser grumbled.

"If you didn't give me less than an HOUR to pack, I wouldn't need to rush!", He retorted between breaths.

The Koopalings and Junior just stared at Luigi, as he wiped the sweat from his forehead. They looked at Bowser and erupted in questions.

"Him!? Are you kidding?!"

"Why is he wearing a polo and jean- jeggings?! I'm appalled!"

"He doesn't even have a shell!"

"He's that weak?! Look at his arm!"

Roy just glared at him and shook his head. Luigi shivered and just lowered his head in embarrassment.

"You've gotta be kidding me! Even my smallest attack would knock him off his feet!"

"QUIET! One at a time!", Bowser growled. "I said I'll explain this in the castle, now hop to it!"

The kids grumbled and complained as they walked in with their luggage carried behind them. Luigi blinked and felt relieved that this gave him some time to collect his thoughts.

"So... Kids?", He started. "How many times have you-"

"what?...NO I DIDN'T-"

The Koopalings all went into their separate chambers and started unpacking. Junior on the other hand, had other ideas.

He scampered into his clown car, huffing a bit as he fell in and flew off into the halls. He wanted to understand why his dad chose someone like Luigi to be the Queen. He always boasted about the beautiful and infamous Princess, so what made the little plumber so special.

"I'm leaving."

"ok?", Luigi looked at him confused. He already knew Bowser was on his way, but wasn't sure why the scaly guy was watching him unpack.

"I'm REALLY leaving you here.", He repeated.

"Mhm."

"I don't know when I'll be back! It could take days!", Bowser exclaimed.

Luigi put his shirt in the dresser and turned his head to Bowser slowly, "And?.. You made it clear I'm staying.."

"Right..", the King grunted with a grin. "Good to know you're finally listening."

Luigi just stood there, he gestured to him his eyes squinting and the finger tips of his free hand touching. His mouth gaped as he was unable to understand the beast's persistence.

Junior flew by but backed up once he heard murmurs coming from down the hall. His father's tail laid outside the door and as he began to get closer he finally heard the slight embarrassment coming from the King.

"Are you asking me to go with you?"

"No! But since you're SO persistent about it!"

"I mentioned it ONCE"

"Look, Greenie. I get it. If you're too scared to ask about it in my presence then that's understandable. You are quite weak, but I'll consider your involvement in my duties."

"I...I DIDN'T EVEN ASK!"

Junior gasped and busted in, falling out of the car as it crashed into the bed and exploded into flames.

Luigi ducked and flew back as best he could to avoid the blast. Meanwhile Junior tucked into his shell and rolled over by his father's feet from the backlash. He popped out ready to defend his dad when he looked up to see his father glaring at him, his brows furrowed.

"Junior.... How many times do I have to tell you.. TO NOT USE THE CAR TO BUST THROUGH DOORS!", he roared. "ONLY THE WALLS GOSH DAMNIT!"

"He was yelling at you!! I wanna make sure he doesn't do it again!"

"He- go to the living area! Wait there with your siblings!"

"But dad!"

"NOW!"

Junior grumbled, "NO!"

Luigi was checking his arm, it was still sore, but the pain wasn't as intense. He coughed from the debris and stood up, looking at the two arguing.

"Great... Now there's two..", he muttered. "HEY!"

Both paused and snapped their jaws shut to stare at Luigi.

"U-Uhm.. my bed is.... Anyways, could we please get that taken care of? I don't want to hear you two bickering for the rest of the morning."

"You can't tell Papa what to do!", Junior huffed.

"I'll send someone to fix it.."

"WHAT?! BUT PAPA!"

"NO, GO TO THE LIVING AREA. NOW!"

"HMPH!"

Junior stomped off, not before sticking his tongue out at Luigi and pulling up his mask. Bowser watched him go and could see Junior wiping a tear away as he headed down the hall. He sighed then turned his attention to the flaming bed.

"If you want my advice-"

"Shut it and follow me."

"Right..", Luigi sighed.

'Not even gonna ask if I'm ok'

The two started down the corridor. Luigi, now making pace with the base of Bowser's tail.

"Oh, and is your arm healed yet?"

"what?.."

"You heard me."

Luigi looked at it, "Yeah, it's doing ok now."

"Good.. because you'll probably break the other one."

"WHY YOU-"

In the living area, the Koopalings were all waiting around on the cushioned furniture. A few blanket slings and egg chairs kept them entertained.

Junior stepped into the room and their attentions were raised as he wiped away another tear.

Roy spun over to him, got on one knee and asked him what happened. "Papa yelled at me! All because I was trying to stop the stupid human from yelling at him!"

"Did you crash the clown car again?", Lemmy asked.

"No!"

He raised an eyebrow at him, "Really?"

"Well..."

Roy smiled, "Nice one, lil Prince."

Before Junior could reply, Bowser walked in and looked at the room. The Koopalings gave him their attention as he smiled from it.

"Wait, where's Larry?"

"On your shell."

"...... LARRY!"

"Hehehe!", the little one slid down and ran back to his blanket swing.

"Now, I know you're all wondering about the Queen. But I can assure you, it's not what you believe it to be.", Bowser began. "There were some... Complications during the wedding ceremony and due to the mix up, Greenie here is the temporary Queen for a year."

Ludwig raised an eyebrow, "So he's still Queen.."

"Yes, but he's only this as a punishment! It's not permanent."

"Why not just imprison him for a year?"

"Yeah!", Morton agreed. "Torture him then patch him up again! Then torture him some more!"

The plumber tensed up and began to shiver from the thought of the kids using his body as a punching bag. He looked up at the King for any sign of mercy.

Bowser raised his brows, his eyes filled with pride in their persistent blood lust. He cleared his throat, "I've already injured his arm as a warning if he is defiant. Additionally, if we tortured him, his brother and the Mushroom Kingdom would begin a siege. Even though we could easily overpower them, we... Need to preserve resources."

Luigi let out a sigh of relief, but was still shocked by Bowser's growing smile.

Junior looked at him directly, "I don't like him! He can't be Queen! Divorce him!"

"Who taught you that?"

"Wendy said that's what couples do! Divorce him!"

"Junior.."

Bowser picked up the tiny Prince, a look of worry on his face. "Look at it this way, if I keep the small, feeble, weak human-"

"Hey!"

"-Then we could taunt Mario and torture him. You can even send a letter saying we fractured his arm."

"Really?!", The young Koopa exclaimed excitedly.

Bowser nodded.

"I'll go get my crayons!"

Luigi tried to jump in, "I don't think that's a good idea!"

"No one asked!", Ludwig noted.

"Now, you can get your crayons but you have to say you'll let the prisoner stay the Queen. No more talk of a divorce! From ANY of you.", His head slowly turned to Wendy.

She looked a bit unamused as she filed her claws, "Right."

"ok!", Junior agreed. He hopped down and ran over to Larry, who was already coloring on some paper.

Bowser looked satisfied with the outcome, but Luigi was just standing there baffled by his solution.

"You do realize my brother will have your skull if he sends that?"

"I'd like to see him try, shrimpie.", Bowser turned to leave. "I'm heading out children! Don't kill too many Troopa while I'm gone."

"Okay!", A few said in unison.

"No promises!"

"Greenie, you're coming back onto the ship."

"What?!"

"Your bed is damaged and I...uh.. don't have other rooms in the castle."

"You can't be serious.", Luigi replied, unable to believe him.

"Unless you want to sleep in my chambers...", Bowser murmured.

"Pardon?"

"Nothing! Get over here now!"

"Fine, geez! Would it hurt you to say please?!", Luigi scolded as he hurriedly rushed over to the stomping Koopa. "Prick."

"Shortie."

"IM ABOVE THE AVERAGE HEIGHT FOR HUMANS!"

"Sure you are. Keep dreaming, little Queen."

"I hate you..", Luigi grumbled.

"I hate you more."

[andwhatnot1]

Three Kingdoms commentary

my adventure continues :)

episode 15-16

Sun Ce is here again! Can't wait for Sun Quan to make an appearance too! He should be an adult by now (?)

Nice to see some familiar faces! His acting was phenomenal in NIF! I love Zhou Yu already :)

Cao Cao really said: Yuan Shu declared himself emperor. Funniest shit I've ever seen.

Wow. Everyone is growing more facial hair now. I don't know how to feel about Lü Bu's stache but I won't be seeing him for too long, according to my history spoilers so I won't have much time to get used to it :(

And this point I would like to note that originally I started watching this show mainly because of Zhuge Liang and Liu Bei but I grew attached to so many characters that it even surprised me

I love how Chen Gong going around ,scolding Lü Bu like: I cant leave you alone for even a few days SMH

Liu Xie still looks miserable. i just wanna hug him,,

This is so unreasonably funny to me help

Cao Cao is an interesting man. I have never despised someone more than him, but at the same time, I'm glued to the screen whenever he appears. Fascinating.

In episode 16, he was so quick to find a solution to the "only three days worth of food has left and we can't win in three days" problem

Find a scapegoat who will be responsible for the food shortage, shake the morale with him only issuing very little portions, kill scapegoat who is 'responsible for everything', morale boosted again, they actually win in a short time.

I will make an exception cause he looks polite

[wrestlingisfake]

The announcers seem awfully perplexed by Hangman's demeanor. Fellas, a dude broke into his house, so he drank that dude's blood, and then he grew a porn stache. Do I have to draw you a diagram?

[anonymous1233211]

All in a Name - Zack

Credit to the original story and writer https://anonymous1233211.tumblr.com/post/734046585154109440/all-in-a-name-zack

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Matthew was having a strange day at the office. Sure, he had his tired mornings, but never on Earth did he feel this tired by lunch hour. He was sitting at his desk trying to make up for the lost work in the AM, when a strange thought in a foreign voice entered his head.

"I've never known any Zacks to be hard workers."

Matthew was shocked by this strange thought - well, as shocked as he could be for how tired he was. He decided if his thoughts weren't going to align at all he may as well take a lunch away from the office. He could make up the work later.

He stood up and started going down the stairs when another thought crossed his mind

"Every Zack I met is a smoker."

Matthew tried to ignore the thought as he walked down the stairs, but he started feeling an unusual craving and hurried down, he went around the corner of the building, and reached for his suit pants pocket and grabbed a carton of cigs that he instinctually knew was there.

Matt pulled out a cigarette and lit it up, and then took a deep drag as he was soothed, the craving going away. As he enjoyed the beginning of his cigarette yet another thought crossed his mind.

"I've never known a Zack to dress formally."

Matt didn't notice as his clothing started to shift all around his body. His suit pants became a pair of jeans two sizes too big as they draped down his shoes, changing into a big pair of DC Skate shoes.

His button up shirt grew sleeves as it turned black and became a plain long sleeved shirt as the buttons fused, similar to the suit jacket which had become noticably, (albiet not to Matt) thinner and turned a deep green and a graphic logo formed right onto his chest.

His tie started to feel cold on the back of his neck as it grew thinner and started to unravel into links, forming a metal chain around his neck.

Matt leaned against the wall, smoking his cigarette, not noticing the increased comfort of his clothes. He knew he was out there to get his mind off something, but wasn't sure what. Another thought entered his mind.

"I've never known a Zack to be clean shaven."

Matt suddenly felt itchiness coming from his face as facial hair erupted from his pores, forming a big goatee with thin sideburns and a neatly shaped attached stache. The sides of his face were shaped down to stubble, but it was evidently a couple of days since he shaved, because it was grey and stubbly.

Mack scratched at his beard, thinking that he could shave it for work, but the thoughts entered his mind again.

"I've never known a Zack to keep a steady job before."

Mack suddenly felt far more relaxed than ever before as he pufed on his cigarette. No need to worry about money if he kept getting fired from odd jobs and collecting off the government's employment insurance. He was more than covered. Suddenly, another thought;

"All the Zacks I know drink in public."

A bottle of bud light materialized in Mack's hand, already partially drank out of. Mack's thought became fuzzy, like it wasn't his first. He reached for his cig, pulled it out, and took a swig of the ale. It tasted good, nothing like a cheap beer. A fuzzy thought;

"I've never met a Zack that doesn't think he looks fly as hell."

As the thought crossed, Mack's ego started inflating as a pair of shades and a snapback materialized on his now bald head. His body reproportioned itself a little, burning a little fat off and having his feet grow to a larger size to fill out his big shows, and Mack let out a smug grin with his cigarette in hand. One final thought crossed his mind.

"I've never known a Zack to be anywhere by the bar at this time of day."

Zack downed the rest of his beer and threw the bottle on the ground. He puffed his cig as he sauntered off to meet his friends at the nearest pub.