#ALSO ALSO DID I MENTION EMILY
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
@new-november-moons guess who watched ep 3 of Boiling Point? Its me :D I watched episode 3 of Boiling Point last night!! I have a Lot of thoughts of this episode /pos, it was epic :DD
I shall be making some more boiling point posts later on hopefully ^^
#boiling point#boiling point bbc#boiling point series#Nick is annoyin but in the pick me kid kinda way#i think i'll wamr up to hm like i did with bolton tho#bc i found bolton annpyign in the beginning but i think hes alright now ig#camile is so sweet btw did i mention that#🫶camille🫶#also carly and holly <3 i ship it#alas no jamie content :(( ik he got a lot of screen time last ep but i wanna see how hes doing!!#ALSO ALSO DID I MENTION EMILY#CAN I GO INTO THE SHOW AND GIVE HER A HUG#SHE NEEDS A HUG#anyways emily also has my whole heart <3#lmao imma come with more boiling point posts later#and ill prolly watch ep4 after 2 weeks bc its exam season soonish so i need to revise#so pls no ep4 spoilers 🙏🙏#emily#camille#nick#jamie
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
FNAF puppet and Michael Afton got beef,,
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#michael afton#mike schmidt#the marionette#the puppet#charlie emily#fnaf#fnaf 2#fnaf movie#fnaf fanart#five nights at freddy's#I don’t think the puppet likes Michael much pff#doesn’t hate him just knows what he did#I like how the puppet is seemingly more aware than most haunted animatronics#so it makes sense to me they’d talk so forwardly to the others#she���s mostly just joking and teasing here#I also think about how violent they were as lefty#so this blunt attitude + hostility in the games towards Michael#just adds to this personality#PUPPET MENTIONED 🔥🔥#we love the puppet
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
got a new job and one of my coworkers asked what my type is and internally i was like how do i describe the nightmare of different people i would get on my knees for
honestly should have just told him the entire cast of dropout was my type
#dimension 20#brennan lee mulligan#ally beardsley#dropout#game changer#dropout tv#zac oyama#siobhan thompson#lou wilson#brian murphy#emily axford#erika ishii#aabria iyengar#sam reich#i’m so gay for these people#we did also talk about baldurs gate and i mentioned that i was having a hard time choosing who to fuck in that so
57 notes
·
View notes
Text
Siobhan: "Bitter Knight was a warlock who had sold her sugar for magic, and the secret is that actually she was Amethar's oldest sister, Rococoa, who was a Revenant, because she came back to revenge herself against Calroy for killing her family."
#dimension 20#a crown of candy#bitternight darknibs#rococoa rocks#siobhan thompson#dropout#like SERIOUSLY#you can't just introduce the most interesting character concept of this entire world and then leave it???#like of course i didn't want ruby to die but i desperately want to meet this character#it makes me actually insane that this character is canon she's mentioned in episode one and yet we never meet her#my posts#also i'm now wondering just how much the pcs knew bc like#did siobhan know about the calroy twist at character creation? or was that a later detail added to the concept of bitternight?#and did they know about catherine before the church twist? bc how could emily have made saccharina otherwise?
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
aria montgomery deserved better 2kforever like. in these first two seasons, her relationship with ezra is hard to watch (in more ways than one! i sometimes find myself rooting for them not to get caught, largely because i like and have sympathy for aria but also because the actors do genuinely have good chemistry. but then i remember how fucked up it is! that’s why the romanticization of this relationship was so dangerous!) - anyway. it was hard to watch and messy but she also had like. other things in her story that at least made her feel like a more fleshed out character. and i always see people saying things about how she’s not as kind as she acts like but she literally shows so much empathy to. most people. and her role as a psuedo caretaker/fixer in her family is so nuanced and interesting and informs a lot of how she interacts with ezra (she feels like she’s been forced into a more adult role, so she courts this adult ‘romance’. ugh.) and it legitimately could have been a nuanced and interesting story about family dynamics and the pressure on teenage girls in their roles in family and how that can be connected to grooming if it had been written that way but!!!!
anyway her story just becomes more and more entangled with Only Being About Ezra from what i remember. which is one of the reasons people kept theorizing about her being A but. i just see it as isolation (not total, she is obviously still very close with her friends, but there is a sort of disconnect.) and then they get MARRIED????? she deserved better for real.
#pretty little liars#aria montgomery#she is legitimately such a kind person#like. i know the WHOLE dynamiv witg jenna is complicated and the lying wasn’t great#but trying to tell her how her pottery looked in an emotional moment?#picking glass out of emily’s hair?#snarking on those sports guys when they were making fun of hanna at lucky leon’s#promising she’s not mad at spencer and giving her the worlds softest hug?#i love her!#she deserved to write and take photos and drink coffee and get a loving partner and not end up with her groomer!!!!#even it was like. s4 when they broke up bc of the book reveal#and stayed broken up#that still would have been better than nothing#anti ezra fitz#anti ezria#grooming mention //#ask to tag //#also her family did not deal with it the right way at all#i understand they were Concerned - as they should have been!#but i always see their s2 hailed as like. the appropriate reaction#but they literally treat her like a criminal like she is just as bad as him#they are more focused on being angry than protecting her especially byron#i just. ugh.#(okay that’s an oversimplification. they are trying to protect her. but the WAY they are doing it is driving her right back into their arms)
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
There is not a single homely thing that, looked at from a certain angle, does not become fairy. Think of the Dapple, or the Dawl, when they roll the sunset towards the east. Think of an autumn wood, or a hawthorn in May. A hawthorn in May — there’s a miracle for you! Who would ever have dreamed that that gnarled stumpy old tree had the power to do that? Well, all these things are familiar sights, but what should we think if never having seen them we read a description of them, or saw them for the first time? A golden river! Flaming trees! Trees that suddenly break into flower! For all we know, it may be Dorimare that is Fairyland to the people across the Debatable Hill
-Lud-in-the-Mist, Hope Mirrlees
#lud-in-the-mist#books#i was so upset i couldn't read emily wilde that i racked my brain trying to come up with an acceptable replacement#then i remembered this book has been on my tbr for a long time and gave it a try#excellent excellent choice#i couldn't believe it's as old as they say because the story felt so confident in what it was doing#none of the quaint whimsy or self-parody you tend to see from pre-tolkien fairy stories#gorgeous prose#i've got so many highlights#this is easiest to share independently#thanks to the chestertonian nature#i didn't like everything ('initiation into the mysteries' sets off my freemason alarms though thankfully it didn't go beyond a few mentions#and i'm not sure i understood everything#but i did love it all the same#also looking at goodreads i seem to be the only person who didn't read it because of ne*l ga*man#i can even say i read it in spite of him
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
i’m trying to catch up with as much dimension 20 as i can before fantasy high junior year, i’m currently on a starstruck odyssey, and can i just say: there is truly no greater example of ally beardsley’s dnd progress than the parallel of ally as kristen applebees willingly taking 36 points of damage, bringing kristen down to 3 hit points as kristen plummets multiple stories due to a failed attempt to use a ribbon dance as a way to fly down 10 stories, and ally as margaret encino willingly taking 11 points of damage, bringing margaret down to 3 hit points so margaret can fall 30 feet from a camera nest, walk up to a giant corn guy, and say “you suck” as all the intrepid heroes look on assuming this to be usual beardsley tomfoolery, only for margaret to walk away & trigger an attack of opportunity which gives murph as barry a chance to push this guy off a ledge & possibly win them the entire encounter & over 1 million credits. INSANE. ally beardsley i’m obsessed with your mind
#ally beardsley#fantasy high#kristen applebees#a starstruck odyssey#margaret encino#what is true joy if not ally beardsley saying ‘call to the guards’ & brennan shouting ‘NOOOOO’#just so funny god#ESPECIALLY because literally one minute earlier brennan was for real trying to goad beardsley into falling from the nest like#‘so did you get some temp kublacaine hp’ thinking he was using beardsley’s insatiable chaos in his favor LITTLE DID HE KNOW#‘statistically you would stay up’ THEY PLAYED HIM LIKE A FUCKING FIDDLE#OH THE HUBRIS#admittedly i haven’t watched nvaf yet but kristen pete margaret the beardsley big 3 to me#also this is unimportant but:#for the sake of my pride i do wanna clarify i was catching up w/ d20 before the fhjy announcement but it has sped up the process a shit ton#i need to understand all the inevitable references#& yea could i watch just the ih campaigns & be fine? probably. but do i emotionally need to watch things chronologically? YES#just have *checks notes* 7 campaigns to watch beforehand not including my planned fh&fhsy rewatch :)#also i literally took a little break from the episode to type this but aso has been INSANE so far especially these past 2 eps!#i’d heard reference of operation slippery puppet but had no idea what it was so i was like ‘omg’ when siobhan mentioned it and THEN#just so insane emily axford my beloved the scheming goes crazy#also also final thing sorry for ranting in the tags but GOD murph has been rollinh so fucking well in this fight BIG BARRY SYX I LOVE YOU#intrepid heroes i love you forever thank you for introducing me to the wonderful world of dropout & of dnd actualplay#okay anyways back to the battle of the brands pt. 2 <3
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
FOUR YEARS OF NOXTMS / six characters !
ft. @viiktorious ( my absolute favorite take on viktor, in the sense that no one else could ever really compare. i think you write him so well when it would be so easy for him to be very oversimplified, and one of the most pleasant surprises of this year - at least so far - has been you bringing him back to the dash ! ), @hoggleswart ( i don't know how well documented my 'sarah shahi deserves to be used more in the rpc' movement is here in nox, but i have been leading that charge for so many years and i was already so invested in roshana before you ticked all my favorite boxes in a character. i love ocs connected to existing canons in ways other than siblings or children, and i'm always a sucker for someone achingly sad ! ), @hcldmybroom ( not unlike the above, i have been wanting ambika to become the next big thing for so long that i, again, was always predisposed to loving a character using her ! there is so much - so far - untapped potential for drama with minette that makes me gleeful, and i really, really enjoy what i have seen of them so far ! ), @chacswins ( this guy is always gonna hurt my heart, and i'm always gonna be way more into that than i should be</3 you and sam are neck to neck in my personal 'most anticipated returns' list, and i'm so happy to be able to play around with you in all the angsty ways i've grown to love playing around with you in over the years of friendship and development we've had ! i'm so fond of damien in a way i think doesn't get expressed enough, and so grateful that his existence has provided me with 1. a whole character, in luca and 2. so many new layers for other characters ! ), @tosteelisms ( cara macdonald, my beloved, i am so glad that someone has finally given you a chance to thrive when you have so deserved it for so long ! she's one of my most adored creations, here, and i am so glad that i was able to entrust her into such capable hands ! you came into nox swinging, and i have loved seeing her form ! ), @acritudos ( last, but not at all least. theo nott was talked about at such length for so long that it would have been so easy for him to lose momentum but. of course. that was never going to happen in your hands. he is everything i've always dreamed of and more in terms of all the various dynamics i always wanted - with pansy, with the slytherin gang as a whole, with astoria, with ginny. with everyone, really ! - and of course it would be you that would give me those goods. how on earth could i expect any differently ! as always, i feel very lucky to write with you and develop such complex connections with you, and i hope that never changes<3 ) !
#nox.graphics#mine*#nox.task#i tried to do like. word i grabbed / associated from aesthetics and stuff you have posted + color#even if the color was a synonym to a color. for proper pantone vibes.#im not sure how i feel about it ! alas it's too late and now im done<3#honorary mentions to : sarah's hermione who feels like an especially special character to have this month considering she was the 1st#we ever had !#emily's dwaco who isn't here but always present in my heart same as them<3#lex's grace moody because i can never go without mentioning JUST how much i adore that v sad girl#( but also ismene because .. yes she dead<3 ... but she formed such vital part of the xu's )#( one of my favorite of all time families to be involved in )#and vicky's tempest. who i constantly forget did not exist in canon.#they are SO well written and i am so crazily invested in their story
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay fineee finally getting back into figuring out an original comic of mine i plan to draw and publish. Well two✌ comics maybe three the third one i wanna make a movie or animation. They're The original stories ive had forever but keep losing inspiration for but that always live in my head ones like danger days meets the matrix meets the terminator and im working on my style guide for it rn getting inspiration back and sketching the creature designs. That ones science fiction post apocalypse gay dystopia and the other one would be like. Short like one part while the dystopia one would be like a series or at least multiple issues but the second one is apocalyptic fantasy and kind of cosmic horror? But its not really horror it just has the same like. Unexplainableness. Its just kind of sad tbh its like. Hopeful but somber but Weird and has a nuclear war and powers and mental illness and genderless entities and a lonely god and queer love facing an apocalypse together and life and reincarnation and ends and beginnings and just. Its my darling. And the third one i want to be a film of some sort is straight up horror lol a lot of body horror and like. Its a hopeless apocalypse it doesn't have a happy ending. Im thinking since i dont know like. cgi or anything. Im thinking of making it a mixture of live action for the characters and stopmotion for the Creatures since i could greenscreen them in if i just make them puppets. itll be a project for when i have free time and money for an adobe subscription lol. If you guys wanna hear abt any of these i might make a sideblog if i start drawing the comic until then just ask me abt any of these and ill gladddly infodump lol. Gay matrix terminator danger days dystopia is for now called In Our Dreams(we can be complete) the weird fantasy apocalypse one always been loosely titled The Stargazer but i could call it Sending My Love(from the other side of the apocalypse) to match lol. And the third one i just call the Bonepocalypse. Also these all came from wild dreams i had like the universes i fully dreamed up its crazy
#oh i have a fourth one too but its not a comic ill write it one day itd just be a novel or something but im self conscious of it bc its like#WEIRDLY similar to good omens eve though i came up with it before i ever saw good omens before the show ever came out#but its gay too lol basically the antichrist and a fallen angel fall in love and stop the end of the world#and rebel against heaven and hell#except neither of them know theyre an angel or the antichrist the fallen angel doesnt have their memories of heaven and the antichrist has#been raised normally and like is contacted by hell like gien visions of what they want hik to do but he doesn't know its real he thinks its#schizophrenia and its. its a crazy story and its my bby i cant wait to write my experiences through them mainly my boy Atlas the antichrist#also did i mention hes transgender#figures lol but yeah i cant wait to write my feelings of transgenderism as somthing holy while being seen as unholy and psychotic and#hhrhhdhdh.#also theyre gay as in theyre queerplatonic partners that kiss sometimes. theyre just soulmates that face the apocalypse together#so if you wana ask abt that story its just called Atlas and Emily for now
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Oh yeah since ive realized i cant do one big masterpost abt my security breach rewrite like i wanted due to image limit stuff (i did all the art on my phone and trying to get it on desktop is a painful process), im just making lil snippet posts to slowly feed you guys information. As per usual, it’s a long post so all the info will be under the cut
Starting off! Protagonist role is shifted over to Vanessa (Gregory still plays a decently important role story-wise, but he loses his protag rights), the ‘gameplay’ (said like that bc its hypothetical. Im not making a game) being split into two sections: the Dayshift Phase, and the Nightshift Phase.
Dayshift Phase (which is the focus of this post) is very simple in nature, but also the part that I have less specific details for at the moment due to it being less impactful on the overall story.
Essentially, Vanessa spends this phase running a variety of errands and tasks within the Pizzaplex, spread across over the span of a 5 day work week. For obvious reasons. While the majority of tasks come from whoever her higher ups are (the newest ceo of fazent will be revealed in a later post), there are a few oddballs mixed in thanks to the 80’s serial killer that lives inside her head. Because we’re ignoring Mimic in this au. At least for now. William has no physical presence in the rewrite though, he’s moreso haunting the narrative just as much as he’s haunting Vanessa. It’s complicated and I’ll get into the changes in a different posts where I’ll discuss the changes that have been made to the Glitchtrap situation, as well as discuss the other employees mentioned in Help Wanted.
The map itself doesn’t change too much. Glamrock Bonnie gets to live in this au (i needed him alive and present for. Reasons I’ll discuss when I get to the Nightshift Phase) and Glamrock Chica gets an actual, proper attraction, which is a rollerskating rink. Yes this means her feet/talons/whatever-the-term-is double as heelys.
But, to start off, here’s the main gal herself!
Vanessa, obviously, gets the rainbow hair back. Because it was the most iconic part of Vanny before SB came out imo. She’s a bit more of an anxious mess, but I would be too if I was under the psychological influence of a serial killer. Her job pretty much stays the same, now working both dayshift and nightshift at the Pizzaplex. Because in true FazEnt fashion, the employees are not treated fantastically.
She doesn’t like talking about either of the founders for wildly different reasons. William because she’s forced to co-exist with him and he has caused great internal suffering over the past five years (Help Wanted takes place in 2033, whereas Security Breach takes place in 2038, so it’s been a long five years for her), and Henry for reasons I’ve touched up on in the past and will further discuss in a later post.
And without further ado, here is her collection of coworkers! Minus her boss
And essentially all information you see here is all the information I have on them, besides a few minor facts. I won’t state them here partially because it’s an uneven amount of facts between them all and partially because tumblr is now running incredibly slow, however if anyone asks things I can and will answer to the best of my ability. Will I ever figure out the specifics for the dayshift phase’s tasks? Maybe! We’ll see
Anyways that’s all for now, I just wanted to show off the girl of the hour as well as her coworkers before I resumed today’s fnaftober piece because it relates to vanny in the ruin part of the rewrite and giving details for the ruin part before the base game part feels wrong. Alright thats all ty
#also! most of em are a lil bit clearer or i just havent decided yet but Blue uses exclusively they/them!#however i didnt think to mention pronouns til i got to Blue. and they were the fourth ref i did and i was too lazy to edit the others#so yknow#vanny will get shown off whenever i talk abt the nightshift phase btw. bc she doesnt show up at all during the dayshift phase#now then!#scov.txt#scov.art#scov.ocs#fnaf#fnaf security breach#security breach#security breach rewrite#fnaf rewrite#fnaf au#security breach au#sorry. i want attention /hj#vanessa fnaf#fnaf vanessa#vanessa emily#fnaf: hauntings of the past au#fnaf hotp au security breach rewrite#thats the. the tag im using for it. bc the other games mostly stay the same. not sb#luis cabrera#fnaf luis#yay thats it :-) bye
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
saw oppenheimer with the bestie this afternoon. honestly I was hoping to get out of the 3 hour movie emotionally destroyed, but ehh that didn't happen. good movie but not great imo and not up to the "masterpiece" hype
#if you can't make me cry about the atomic bomb what am I gonna be crying about I say#to be fair it was still good to watch cillian's pretty pretty face for 3h#and he's really good#not to mention EMILY#my love you could've shined even more with a better script but alas#also dear god did they really cast as Fermi an actor who can't string 2 words of Italian together#and then have him speak Italian#Like WHY#unrelated but I probably caught pneumonia with how cold it was in the cinema#oppenheimer#oppenheimer spoilers#I guess?#also my bestie going “wanna watch this even if it's not avery very happy movie”#and me being like “girl you already know the answer”#typical lol
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
just checked my academic requirements and got jumpscared because my advisor never did that thing she said she was going to do so my academic progress accurately reflects the courses i've taken I am emailing her so fast right now because i want to MAKE SURE I CAN GRADUATE
#to make a long story short I was supposed to take a drawing studio class as a requirement but I just ended up taking drawing 1#and someone (she) told me that if I took drawing 2 as well it would count for a drawing studio requirement#so I did that. but they're not registered that way on my academic progress. EMILY.#emily i took your goddamn printmaking class just to fill the extra 100 level requirement that would be empty once drawing 1 is registered a#a drawing studio requirement#don't do this to me#also need i mention she told me this like??? three years ago???#girl whats taking so long#notes 🫖
1 note
·
View note
Text
Sources for Somerton's Plagiarism from Hbomberguy's Video (as much as I could get)
I went back through Harry's video, focused entirely on the sources James Somerton pulled from in the hopes of creating as much of a comprehensive list as I could--though my Google-Fu is not very strong. I did however find something I thought was forever lost and that made me very happy--specifically the magazine Midlands Zone containing the column by Steven Spinks that Harry poignantly used as an illustration of gay erasure... while Somerton uses it to sound like HE is waxing remorseful about the very subject.
This is not a complete list, I'm sure. For one thing, I was only able to attempt to pull sources that Harry himself mentioned in the video. Surely there's so very much more out there. I expect there to be a great deal more internet archeology to unearth just how much writing and culture Somerton has stolen like he's the British Museum of Natural History but for gay people.
- - - - -
Harry's list of mentioned youtubers:
Alexander Avila - https://www.youtube.com/@alexander_avila Matt Baume - https://www.youtube.com/@MattBaume Khadija Mbowe - https://www.youtube.com/@KhadijaMbowe Lady Emily - https://www.youtube.com/@LadyEmilyPresents Shanspeare - https://www.youtube.com/@Shanspeare RickiHirsch - https://www.youtube.com/@RickiHirsch VerilyBitchie - https://www.youtube.com/@verilybitchie
Harry created a convenient playlist of videos by these and other people he wants to bring to everyone's attention.
Please give them your support.
- - - - -
Midlands Zone Magazine - Column by Steven Spinks
After a great deal of searching, I found an archive of the "Midlands Zone" magazine, where you can read through past issues dating all the way back to February 2014. I have also found the issue from which Somerton took Spinks' poignant discussion of gay erasure: Overall archive Specific Issue - Pages 16-17
It will not allow you to download it, but you can read it exactly as it appeared in print form.
- - - - -
My best effort to find the exact book or article Somerton lifted from to be able to get attention to the original writers
Tinker Bells and Evil Queens By Sean Griffin
The Celluloid Closet By Vito Russo Wikipedia article about the book Wikipedia article about the documentary My weak google-fu could not find where you can access the book or documentary. Check your local municipal or university library for book or documentary, or if you know a good source for one or both, please reblog with it added
Camp and the Gay Sensibility By Jack Babuscio
The Groundbreaking Queerness of Disney's Mulan By Jes Tom Personal site with links to social media accounts
Why Rebel Without a Cause was a milestone for gay rights By Peter Howell
Why "The Craft" is still the best Halloween coming out movie By Andrew Park
Opinion: From facehuggers to phallic tails, is 'Alien' one of the queerest films ever? By Dani Leever
Women and Queerness in Horror: Jennifer's Body By Zoe Fortier
[Pride 2019] We Have Such Sights to Show You: Hellraiser and the Spectrum of Queerness By Alejandra Gonzalez
Revealing the Hellbound Heart of Clive Barker's 'Hellraiser' By Colin Arason
Queering James Cameron's Aliens (1986) By Bart Bishop
Demeter and Persephone in space: transformation, femininity, and myth in the 'Alien' films By David Greven
Fears of a millennial masculinity: Scream's queer killers By David Greven (Scholarly site, unable to access original work, offers a way to request a full copy of the text in PDF)
Queer Subtext in Stephen King's It - Part 1: 'Reddie' Character Analysis By Rachel Brands Rachel is the very unfortunate lady who found out she was being stolen from because she supported Somerton through Patreon and saw one of his videos early with her writing--lacking any form of citation or credit
How 'It: Chapter Two' Leaves Richie Tozier Behind By Joelle Monique
When Horror Becomes Strength: Queer Armor in Stephen King's 'IT' By Alex London
Why Queer People Love Witchcraft By Amanda Kohr
'The Favourite' Queers The Past And The Present By Giorgi Plys-Garzotto
(Wuko) Crush (Mako x Wu) By MoonFlower on YouTube
5 Terrible Movies With Awesome Hidden Meanings By J.F. Sargent
The Radicalization of Sexuality: The Queer Casae of Jeffrey Dahmer By Ian Barnard
Netflix's 'Dahmer' backlash highlights ethical issues in the platform's obsession with true crime By Shivani Dubey
The Possible Disturbing Dissonance Between Hajime Isayama's Beliefs and Attack on Titan's Themes Original Article by "Seldom Musings" (Author has made all posts not related to Attack On Titan private and has retired from the blog)
Everyone Loves Attack on Titan. So Why Does Everyone Hate Attack on Titan? By Gita Jackson
- - - - -
The following people are otherwise named in the video. There are no direct citations of articles or books by them in said video. I am unable to guarantee that I have identified the correct individual.
Darren Elliott-Smith Michaela Barton David Church Claire Sisco King Amanda Howell Jessica Roy
- - - - -
Telos announced and cancelled a film likely based on this book: The Final Girl Support Group - By Grady Hendrix
- - - - -
I refrained from including certain sources.
First off only focusing on Somerton's work.
Secondly not including anything that might be visible enough to not require amplifying their voice (I cannot speak for all of those I have found links to, but journalism is frequently a thankless job).
Thirdly any source that is of a nature that is antithetical to the very existence of the queer community, such as the right-leaning source that didn't make it into Somerton's video, but Harry was able to identify as a source he had considered using.
If you feel I have missed a mentioned source--or you know of a source from material that was not covered in Harry's video--please do not hesitate to reblog with added details.
- - - - -
Please share this information far and wide, and please add to it if you find more material that can be positively identified and linked to the creator/writer.
#hbomberguy#james somerton#Plagiarism#Queer#LGBT#LGBTQIA#youtube#Solidarity#gay erasure#Make them un-erased
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
this is all correct, except that bray is Māori, not native american (there’s some casual racism regarding him and tai san being somewhat mismashed in cultures, which i think is probably most egregious in season 1 [take that with a grain of salt tho, as i’m not part of any of the groups impacted])
season 4 and 5 are specifically the cyberpunk seasons. season 2 and 3 are about religious cults, and season 1 is a general “how to learn to live with and get along with complete strangers after a world ending catastrophe” theme. despite the themes being very different in each section, the story itself is mostly consistent i think, and the characters are extremely compelling.
All these cyberpunk-themed tabletop RPGs on itch.io and not one of them that aims for the vibe of those goofy-ass Canadian YA cyberpunk shows that aired on YTV back in the 1990s. You know the ones:
the protagonist is named something safely conventional like Kyle or Jake, while every single other kid is sporting a moniker like "Glitch" or "Fractal" or "K C" with absolutely no indication that these aren't the names their parents gave them
everybody's wearing an eleven-year-old white kid's idea of what hip-hop fashion looks like, except for the ambiguously teenage principal villain, who's sporting a Spirit Halloween knockoff of a random military uniform
90% of the show is clearly filmed in some anonymous industrial park, apart from a handful of flashbacks which were probably shot in the producer's house
the writing seems to be unclear on the distinction between "hacker" and "wizard"; there's a strong possibility none of the writers have ever actually used a computer in their lives
Ryan Reynolds is there
I swear I'll write it myself if I have to.
#i hope its okay to add on to this!#i just really love the tribe#and also i feel compelled to mention bray being Māori any chance i get bc its really only mentioned on the website and in interviews w#the actor#(bc the actor is Māori and they generally did race blind casting it was added after the initial episodes were written and dwayne cameron#specifically consulted/added on to it)#to anyone reading this: pls be aware that it is mired in cultural appropriation#the tribe#emily talks#long post
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
and they were roommates pt. 2
pairing : Spencer Reid x fem!student!roommate!reader summary : the BAU team works the case, you get to help word count : 2.3k warning : canon-typical violence, mention of violence and sexual violence A/N : thank you all so much for all the love on part 1 of this !!! I love getting feedback, it's incredibly motivating ! I will probably do a part 3 :)) Also, my cat is sitting next to me as I write this, which I find quite funny
part 1, part 3, part 4
Back at the police station, Spencer had trouble focusing on the case. His mind kept wandering over to you, wondering what you were doing, how you were doing. He was on edge and the entire team could feel it. Hotch pulled him to the side to ask him if he wanted to give you a phone call. Reid refused, but settled on sending you a text, something he never usually did while working. Something he never usually did because he wasn't the biggest fan of technology and also because he couldn't decipher how you were actually feeling without hearing your voice and all the quirks in the way you spoke which gave away your real feelings.
Sent by Dr. Ironed Socks : < Hey. How are you doing? > Sent by You : < Ok, I'm having a tea on the couch. Geoff is in REM sleep on my lap. Thx for checking <3 >
Your text was followed by a pixelly picture of your slightly overweight (Spencer couldn't use that term to describe Geoffrey around you or you'd get upset) orange cat sprawled out on your lap, legs and arms askew, fast asleep. Spencer felt a small wave of relief spread through him. You were okay for now. Geoffrey was looking after you. Later, he'd help you process and give you all the tools necessary to get over such a traumatic event and move on. It was almost as if that was in his job description.
Returning to the room where the BAU team had settled in, Spencer sent Hotch a grateful nod. Hotch moved his lips in what resembled a small smile, Reid couldn't be sure. "Okay," Garcia's voice resounded from the speaker sitting in the middle of the round table, "I've contacted all of Mary Goldman's professors and it turns out she didn't go to class today. Her first class was at 11:30 but she never showed up." "None of the students we interrogated on campus had seen her after 10:15," Emily spoke up. "Spencer's roommate saw her between 10:30 and 11:00," Rossi intervened. "Okay, we'll get her to come in," Hotch affirmed. Spencer's whole body tensed. You had been the last person to see the victim. His mind was so busy reeling, thinking about everything you'd have to go through as the most promising witness, that he missed Morgan's question.
"Reid?" Derek raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sorry, what did you say?" "What was the time of death according to the coroner?" "14:30," Rossi answered. "It was 14:26, actually," corrected Reid. Rossi rolled his eyes. "Okay, so the unsub has his victim between around, let's say 11:15, and 14:26," Rossi shot a pointed look at Spencer, "that's about three hours and 11 minutes. In those three hours, he had time to take the victim someplace where neither of them would be seen or heard, beat and sexually assault her, and finally dump her in smack-dab in front of the university." "He's definitely organised and wants to send a message," Emily thought aloud. "But what is he trying to say? Look at what I can do? You can't stop me?" "Friends," interrupted Garcia, "I'm going to need at least some information before I even try to get anything out of a search. He's taking and leaving them on campus, so I'm guessing he doesn't necessarily need a vehicle. Does he live in the area?" "Yes, he's local or knows the area, he knows these women and he most likely knows the campus. Search for white males, early twenties with a record of violence and sexual misconduct. Cross-reference that with victims of reported abuse and sexual abuse in the last twenty five years. Run background checks for all university staff. Also have a look at similar victims and MOs in this area in the last five years. This may not be his first time," spoke Hotch. "On it, I'll get back to you when I've found something." "Thanks, Garcia."
You'd taken a shower as soon as you'd arrived home. The water was too hot and you'd scrubbed your skin too hard but getting out, you felt a slight bit better. Heavily disliking the way you still felt, you opted for a cup of Earl Grey tea with milk and sugar. Settling on the couch with a steaming cup in your hands, you tucked your legs beneath you and sighed.
Images of Mary's dead body were printed onto the inside of your eyelids. You still couldn't believe it. Your mind reeled as you tried to think of an explanation for it all. Whichever path you followed, you came up empty. You could not comprehend or imagine any reason of taking the life of an innocent person, especially in such a violent way. Luckily for you, you still didn't know the extent of the violence.
A familiar noise pulled you from your dark thoughts. Geoffrey had just jumped down from his cat tree. You watched him stretch and languidly walk over to you. He meowed once before jumping onto the couch, right next to you. You moved your legs so that you were sitting cross-legged and scratched his head. He purred in delight and pressed himself against you. He sniffed at your tea with an unimpressed look before climbing into your lap before letting himself flop down on his side, stretching out his appendages. You cooed as his pink toe-beans stretched too and laid a hand on his belly, scratching gently. The vibrations of his purrs had a calming effect on you. "Are you trying to make me forgive you for biting my ankle the other day when I wouldn't give you any more treats? You know Spencer says you're a bit overweight, I was just trying to get him to stop body-shaming you, my love..."
A few minutes later, you get a text from Spencer. About thirty minutes after that, you get a phone call from him. "Hey, would you mind coming to the station? It turns out you're the last person to have seen the victim."
"I'll do the cognitive interview." "Reid, I don't think that's a good idea." "Look, yes I'm invested, I know that. But I also know her and-" "Reid, no. This is the reason we such have procedures." "But I-" "Reid." Hotchner's tone translated finality. Spencer's shoulders sank in defeat. He had figured that if he had been the one conducting the interview, maybe it would have been less traumatic for you. He hated the idea of not being there for you, with you, during such a trying moment. He bit his bottom lip.
"I'll do it," volunteered Morgan. Reid felt slight comfort at that, Morgan was one of the few people he would entrust his life to. He could entrust you to him for the interview, even if he didn't like it. Hotchner nodded. "Reid, you work with Garcia, focus on finding other victims with the same MO to help build the profile." Reid nodded and went to find his colleagues.
When you entered the police station, it was almost like he could feel your presence. He came to find you straight away, not wanting to leave alone even for a second. "Hey." "Hey." Reid immediately pulled you in for a meaningful embrace, burying his face in your hair. The smell of your shampoo, conditionner and body wash were bliss to his nostrils. They were a promise that you were here, you were safe, you were okay. Morgan watched from afar, a small smile playing at his lips. He knew Reid, and the hug you exchanged was both too hasty and too tight to be anything casual. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry to have to make you come in, but they're going to do- well I wanted to do it but they wouldn't let me, so it's-"
A slightly older, very muscular and gentle man stepped forward, holding out his hand to you. You shook it. "I'm Agent Derek Morgan. I'm one of Spencer's colleagues. I'll be the one conducting the interview, seeing as there's a conflict of interest with you and Spencer. I hope you can understand that." You introduced yourself and looked at Spencer before answering Derek. "Yes, I understand, it's- it's not a problem." "Great, if you could just follow me, please?" You licked your lips and sent Spencer a look, which he answers with a nod of reassurance and a small smile, before following Derek.
"You can close your eyes if it makes you more comfortable." You were sat in an uncomfortable plastic chair. The light above you was ticking at uneven intervals and the room smelt of worry. You didn't know how you could get any more comfortable, but listening to Morgan's even, alto voice helped a bit. "Okay." You closed your eyes. "You told Agent Rossi that you crossed the victim somewhere around quarter to eleven. Is that correct?" "Uh, yes." "Where did you cross her?" "In the main hall." "Where were you going?" "Um, I had just been to the bathroom and I was heading to my Anglo-American Literary Survey class." "Okay, can you describe to me everything about the moment when you crossed the victim? What you saw, what you felt, smelled, heard? Was anything out of the ordinary?" You opened your eyes.
"Um, I'm sorry, but could you stop referring to Mary as the victim, please? She has a name, which is Mary Goldman, and a victim wasn't the only thing she was." Derek was slightly surprised at your comment but understood where you came from. Separating from the name was a way for profilers to gain some distance from the horrendous violence. Personally knowing the victim, you didn't have such luxury. "Of course, I apologise. What did you feel when you crossed Mary? Was anything out of place?"
You nodded in thanks and tried to bring yourself back to that moment. It seemed unreal, how such a small interaction suddenly held such importance. "O-Okay, uh, my hands are still a bit wet. There weren't any towels in the bathroom. I saw her after she saw me and we exchanged a smile. I thought she looked really pretty today, but I didn't tell her. We really don't know each other that well." "Okay, that's good. Was she wearing anything out of habit for her?" "Uhh, no, she was wearing a pleated skirt and a sweater vest. She often dresses like that, I don't know exactly why I thought she looked pretty. I guess she just looked happy. Nothing was out of the ordinary." "Good. Could you hear or smell anything?" "Yeah, well, there were the voices of other people in the hall. I can hear girls laughing. I smell Mary's perfume when she walks past me. She always wears the same one, it's Chanel, Mademoiselle Coco specifically, she told me once at a party."
"Okay, do you know where she's going?" "I- yeah, she's heading for her Behavioural Neuroscience class." "Is she walking in the right direction?" "Uh... Yes, yes, she is. She's not in too much of a hurry, though, she doesn't like the teacher." "So why is she heading there already, then? The class only starts at 11:30." "She likes to reread the material from the previous week before the class starts." "Why doesn't she like the teacher?" "No one does, all he does is read off his slides and he's a jerk when it comes to grading."
Morgan suppressed a smile at your comment. "Okay, thank you so much, Y/N, this was very helpful." "Was it? I didn't feel like-" "Yes, I promise you've just shared some crucial pieces of information." "O-Okay, if you say so."
All eyes were on Morgan as he entered the briefing room. He put his paper coffee cup down on the table and looked at Hotch. "Nothing was out of the ordinary. Mary was wearing habitual clothes and the same perfume she always wore. She was heading to the same class, as she did weekly, at the same time. My guess is this guy knew her routine and did a blitz attack. Y/N gave me the number of Mary's best friend, and according to her, Mary didn't have any guys in her life except for her dad and brother."
Hotchner nodded. Spencer couldn't help but feeling proud of you for being able to go through with the interview and to provide such useful information, too. He'd have to congratulate you when he got home. "Pretty boy and I found three similar victims in the last three years. They weren't connected to this case because they were in another university, just on the other side of the state line. Last year, three girls, university students, were killed, same MO, all disappeared for about three hours before being found dead in front of the university, they attended," Garcia spoke from the speaker. Spencer nodded in agreement to her words. "What did the police find back then?" asked Emily. "Nothing, they- uh, did all they could during the month that the three murders happened but after the third victim, the unsub stopped," Spencer answered. "Stopped?" Emily repeated, brows drawn together in confusion. "Yeah, he just- stopped killing and disappeared. Our best guess is that something triggered him then and that the same thing triggered him now."
"Oh, another thing," Garcia sounded reluctant to share the information she had, "I looked at all the victims' pictures and... well, I'll just send them to you, that'll be easier."
Spencer's blood ran ice cold as he stared at the four girls on the screen. They all looked exactly like you.
Taglist : (all those of you who wanted a part two <3) @princess-ofthe-pages @usuck @theylovemelody @empressgraytea @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @lillianacristina
#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fic#Spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#dr spencer reid#criminal minds x you#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
extraordinary measures | s.r.
in which your life hangs in the balance after a brutal attack, and Spencer has to hold himself together for the sake of you and your baby
who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: angst content warnings: fetal abduction, potentially inaccurate medical information, entirely from spencer's pov, very violent crime, mom!reader, hospitals, medication, spencer lashes out at jj, rossi's son. word count: 4.41k a/n: the people said dad!spencer angst and i delivered. also! trying something new with formatting my posts. i pay for canva pro and need to get my money's worth.
The hospital staff had moved them into a conference room, giving the BAU more space to spread out – and so Spencer’s pacing wouldn’t disturb the other people in the waiting room. This isn’t real. This isn’t happening. This isn’t real. This isn’t happening. Not to us. Not to me. Not to her.
The statistics on fetal abduction were alarming. Before today, there had only been thirteen cases since Spencer had joined the BAU. Today alone, there had been two.
“Excuse me,” an unfamiliar voice said, followed by two knocks on the door, “I’m so sorry, but have you had the chance to fill out some of the forms that we gave you?”
Answering for him, Penelope grabbed the clipboard off of the table and passed it to the nurse, “The insurance card is on the top,” she informed the nurse. Nervously, the blonde looked between the medical professional and Spencer, “Is there any update?”
The nurse cringed slightly, “I don’t have one. I’ll see if they can send someone to talk to you.” She nodded assuredly before peeling out of the room.
“Can I get you anything?” Garcia asked helplessly. He had already been given tea, water, coffee, and a sandwich, but he didn’t want any of it.
Shaking his head numbly, Spencer dragged his hands down his face as he replayed the events of this morning in his head.
He wasn’t even supposed to be working, you were due any day now, but Emily had called him with the case and gave him the choice of working. He was supposed to go with you to the check-up, but you had encouraged him to go save a life.
The woman who had been found this morning had her abdomen crudely cut open and her baby was born via a botched cesarean section, but her baby was too premature and didn’t make it. They were both found in an alley near the hospital by a garbage man. Then, while he and Luke were at the medical examiner’s office, his phone started to ring.
You had been discovered, bleeding out, outside of your obstetrician’s office, and if you hadn’t been so close to a building full of doctors, you probably wouldn’t have made it as far as surgery right now. The fact that you had been brought to surgery should have been enough to give him hope, but he hasn’t been raised to be hopeful, he was raised to be pragmatic. The reality of the situation was that in cases of fetal abduction, the mothers rarely made it out the other side.
He was left with Garcia to keep him company, she stayed as a watchdog, mainly looking through traffic footage on her laptop as she made sure Spencer didn’t go entirely off the rails. “You’re going to burn a hole in the floor,” she said offhandedly, begging Spencer to just sit down for a moment.
With a huff, he took a seat next to Penelope, leaning his head back on the taupe drywall, “I don’t know what to do,” he confessed.
“We’re going to wait, we are not going to catastrophize, and we will listen to any and all updates that the doctors give us,” she said determinedly, nodding her head as she did so. “We only know what we know and assuming the worst will just lead to feeling worse.”
Closing his eyes, he agreed, listening to the bustle of the hospital from inside the secluded, makeshift waiting space. He wished he knew more about your status when you came in, there were the crime scene photos – which Penelope was under strict orders not to show him – and a quick mention from a resident about blood loss, but nothing else.
“Dr. Reid?” A new voice said, snapping him out of his stupor as he rose to his feet, staring at the doctor who came in with his scrub cap on, “I’m afraid there isn’t much news. Things are still touch and go. They’re hopeful that they can get the bleeding under control, once they do that, we’ll know more. I’ll come out and let you know, alright?”
With the doctor leaving, Garcia reopened her laptop, “You see? We can’t assume the worst because we just don’t know enough yet.”
“Garcia,” he interrupted, hopeful for just a moment of silence to digest the new information – if you could even call it that.
Nodding succinctly, she returned to her work, “Right, okay.”
With the arrival of JJ, Penelope left to check in at the office, and since a profiler was bound to know more information, he asked JJ for an update. His baby had to be almost three hours old now, and he knew nothing about them.
He was left disappointed, there was no information on the UnSub or the baby, “What’s the point of it anyway?”
“Everyone is working on it, Spence. No one is going to rest until this case is closed,” JJ tried to reassure him.
Spencer wasn’t sure he was ever truly going to rest again, “Where is someone supposed to go with a newborn baby? The umbilical cord has to be still attached.” Statistically, women were more likely to commit cesarean abductions, and they usually did so after the loss of their own child or because they told someone they were pregnant and needed to produce a baby. “No one can tell me anything about my child, JJ, don’t you understand that? Can’t you try to understand how that feels?”
Bracing herself, JJ nodded, “You’re angry, I get it, you-“
“No, you don’t. My wife is bleeding out in surgery, and I have no fucking clue where our baby is. I have never met them. I don’t know if I have a son or a daughter or if they’re alive and you have the nerve to tell me that you ‘get it’?” He peered over at the blonde profiler. You should’ve been the first person to hold your baby, and instead, you might never live to find out what happened to you.
She was silent for a moment, “You’re right. I- I can’t even begin to process what you’re feeling right now, but all we can do is keep working on the case.”
Dropping his head in his hands, Spencer shook his head, “Then go work on the case,” he insisted, “I don’t… I need to be alone right now.”
Just as the four-hour mark approached, the glass door opened again, and David Rossi walked in.
“Are you here to lecture me?” Spencer asked, his voice raspy from crying in the solitude of the room, he wondered if JJ had told everyone how he lashed out at her.
Crossing one leg over the other, Rossi answered, “Nope,” he said, popping the last syllable. “I’m just here to sit and wait, same as you, kid.”
Nodding, Spencer leaned his head back and closed his eyes as a protection against the fluorescent lights of the hospital, “How did you manage?”
There were some things – life events – that were left unspoken in the BAU. Traumas that people didn’t want uncovered, horrors that the team didn’t need to relive, but Spencer needed answers, and this was the only way he could think to get them. “Manage what?”
“Losing your son,” he answered, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he kept his eyes closed, wondering if he too would lose a child. Birth and death within the same day.
Clearing his throat, Rossi took a moment before responding, and Spencer wasn’t sure if he was appalled at the question or if he simply wasn’t sure how to respond, “Well, I’m not sure I ever really did. Not for a long time, at least,” he admitted.
Digesting the information, Spencer shifted in his seat, “I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. Everyone just keeps telling me to wait, but…” he chuckled to himself, “Y/N always jokes that if patience is the companion of wisdom, then I have to be the exception.”
He had always been told to wait. Wait for his turn. Wait for the perfect person to show up. He had waited, and he had gotten you, but all of that waiting had led him here. In this beige room where he had signed papers asking doctors to use extraordinary measures to try and save your life.
“Dr. Reid?” One of the doctors from earlier called his name, knocking on the glass door. Instinctively, Spencer stood up, wiping his hands on his pants and looking at the doctor expectantly, “Oh, please,” the doctor said, “Take a seat.”
Hesitantly, Spencer lowered himself back down into the hospital chair, he couldn’t help but feel like that was a bad sign.
“All things considered, your wife is very, very lucky,” the doctor informed him, “She’s not fully out of the woods yet, but they’re setting her up in recovery right now. I’m just waiting on a message from my colleague, and then I’ll be able to bring you up to see her.”
A flurry of questions flew through his mind at once, “What are you still concerned about?” He asked, leaning over and resting his elbows on his knees.
Nodding, the doctor continued, “Y/N lost a lot of blood in the attack. When you factor in the trauma of having a baby and a four-hour surgery, there’s a lot of healing that has to happen, and right now she doesn’t have the strength for it.” His phone chimed, and Spencer jolted, trying not to get his hopes up if it wasn’t about you, “Come with me,” the doctor said.
Rossi offered to let the rest of the team know and Spencer rambled off a random confirmation as he followed the doctor through the doorway, feeling like he was floating. As they walked through the hospital, Spencer grew more and more anxious.
Your hand was cold. In fact, your hand was so cold that Spencer asked the doctor to turn the volume on your vital monitor up so that he could have the constant reassurance that you were alive.
Blood was being transfused still, he had already forgotten the doctor’s estimate on just how much blood you had lost, but if he had the urge to read through your medical chart, he was sure he could find out. The only problem was, ever since the doctor left, he hadn’t been able to do anything except stare.
Every once in a while, he pinched your index finger, testing the capillary refill time out of his own morbid curiosity while blood was being returned to your body. Agents and officers stood outside of your hospital room in a steady rotation. The BAU wasn’t sure if your life was still in danger, but they weren’t willing to take any risks.
There were countless law enforcement personnel involved in this case now, if not directly investigating the case, they were at least contributing to the search. The Manassas Field Office, DC Metro, the Maryland Police – they were all out there looking. Out the window, he could see news reporters gathering out front to start their afternoon broadcasts.
It had been four hours. Four hours and there was still no word on the baby or the UnSub. The baby would need to eat soon, and Spencer found himself depending on the UnSub to have had the forethought to take care of the newborn.
Every couple of minutes, you would mumble something in your sleep, and he willed you to stay asleep. Selfishly, he wanted you to stay asleep until he knew the baby was safe – until he knew he could have something good to tell you.
Penelope was stationed right outside the door. She likely thought he hadn’t noticed her return, but the clicking of her keyboard gave her away.
Infrequently, his phone buzzed in his pocket, and he tried not to concern himself with it. Garcia had made contact with your mom, being sure to reach out to your family before any other news hit the airwaves.
He adjusted the way the nasal cannula rested on your face before bringing your hand to his mouth, pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles and resting your cold fingers against his cheek, as if his face had the capacity to warm your whole body. Briefly, he wondered if the team would be willing to have a desk agent bring you a blanket from home.
The team would probably find a way to get him a helicopter if he requested it.
Flowers and cards flowed into your hospital room, arriving from people who knew you to people who had seen your story on the news. He had to look away when a small stuffed elephant was delivered by a nurse, knowing that the baby it belonged to was nowhere to be found.
Much to his surprise, he looked away from the stuffed animal just to find you looking back at him. The sorrow in your eyes a staggering reflection of that which could be found in his own. One glance at you and he knew that there was no need for him to break the news to you – you were well aware.
Spencer remained wholly silent as a slew of medical professionals filtered in and out of the room, a cacophony of directives and questions sent your way as tears filled your waterline. He captured your hand in both of his, holding your hand like it was a lifeline to everything he knew as the truth. He was here, you were here, and you were both alive. Tethered to you in the woven web of life, he refused to falter. Not now. Not when you needed him the most.
He answered the questions that you didn’t know the answers to and watched, tight-lipped, as your doctor kept you informed. Dr. Lasher was picking and choosing from your chart, telling you anything pertinent, and leaving out anything that she thought could wait for later.
Once the doctor had cleared through an extensive list of maladies, everyone let you have the room. “Darling,” he whispered, reaching a hand out to adjust the way your hospital gown rested on your shoulder, covering some of the exposed wires.
“There are no leads?” You asked tentatively, the pain in your voice exacerbated by the swelling caused by the breathing tube you’d had during surgery. Your eyes were glassy, and Spencer didn’t know if it was from sorrow or pain or fear. It was a question he was afraid to ask.
He shook his head, “Not yet, but everyone’s looking,” he fed you the same reassurances that had been given to him. The same reassurances that he hadn’t believed.
You moved your hands, laying your palms flat on the sterile white sheets and starting to push yourself up, only to be met with Spencer’s hands guiding you back down to the pillows. “I’ve gotta go,” you mumbled, “I wanna help. Spence, please let me help.” Fresh tears welled in your eyes as you looked at him in desperation.
The way your bottom lip quivered was what broke him, he tilted his head to the side, “You can help just fine from right here, okay?” He looked out into the hallway, wondering which member of the team was around for you to talk to. “I’ll be right back,” he told you, squeezing your hand before retreating to the hallway, never letting you out of his line of sight.
“Hey,” Penelope greeted, the compassion in her voice giving him pause, “How is she?”
Exhausted, terrified, in pain – all applicable at the moment. Spencer thought about answering for a moment before skipping Garcia’s question entirely, “Who’s around for a cognitive?”
You didn’t quite have the energy for a full interview, but you were so adamant about helping that he couldn’t refuse you, not today. “JJ’s one floor up, do you want me to call her for you?”
He thought about it for a moment, he hadn’t handled his last interaction with JJ with the most care, but you needed someone to talk to and it couldn’t be him. “Yeah,” he nodded, “Please.”
Spencer sat on the edge of your bed, smoothing your hair as he tried to comfort you. In all of the time he’d known you, he’d never need you so defeated.
Not much came out during your cognitive with JJ, either there was a mental block in the way or you hadn’t seen much when you were attacked. Whichever one it was, Spencer was fighting himself internally on whether or not he should be thankful.
“I’m so sorry,” Spencer murmured, keeping his voice low as you fought off sleep. “Close your eyes, sweetheart,” he cooed, “You need to rest.”
You fought sleep with everything you had in you, which wasn’t much anymore. The cognitive interview had gone too long. Your nurse was the one who put her foot down and ended it, even when you wanted to keep going. “It’s not fair,” you cried, slow tears making their way down your cheeks.
Very slowly, Spencer could feel his heart breaking as your exhaustion and desolation worked together to make you as miserable as possible, “I know, lovey. I know,” he assured you as tears filled his eyes.
Glassy eyes looked up at him, “I just wanted to be a mom,” you whispered, your speech slurred with sleep.
Letting his own tears fall to the white sheets of your hospital bed, Spencer nodded, “You are a mom.”
He didn’t add anything. He didn’t have it in him to make a grandiose speech about how you would always be your baby’s mother, and, luckily, he didn’t need to. Your eyes finally fell shut, final tears falling from your face as Spencer found himself grateful that sleep finally took you.
Never leaving your side, Spencer pulled the chair back up next to you, resting his chin on your bed's armrest and watching you sleep. Very slowly, color was beginning to return to your face, yet you still looked so different from when he had left the house that morning.
Unsure how long it had been, Spencer shot up straight when Penelope came rushing to the doorway, placing a finger to his lips, he nodded toward your sleeping form. Even so, the technical analyst waved him over.
Carefully, he slipped his hand out of yours and walked around your bed to Penelope, “What is it?”
Tears filled the blonde’s eyes as she looked up at him, she put both of her hands on his upper arms and cried, “They found your baby. It- they’re pulling up to the ambulance bay right now.”
Spencer’s lips parted in shock, having fully prepared himself for the day to end in undeniable heartbreak. “Are- is the baby okay?”
Penelope nodded, “They’re going up to the NICU right now to get checked out but apparently the EMTs said the baby looks completely unharmed.”
Turning to look at you, still asleep on the bed, Spencer gave Penelope a quick embrace before returning to your bedside, “Sweetheart,” he whispered, trying to wake you up from sleep that you still needed. “Honey,” he said, gently cupping your cheek with his hands as your eyes fluttered open.
You hummed groggily, squinting up at him under the fluorescence of the hospital.
“The baby’s here,” he murmured to you, making sure you didn’t jump up at his words. “They’re headed up to the NICU for a quick check, and-“
“Go,” you cut him off, your eyes wide and full of tears. “Please go hold them, Spence,” you cried, voice rough with sleep.
His shoulders slouched forward slightly, looking between you and Penelope in the doorway, “I’ll stay here,” Penelope offered immediately. “You go, I’ll stay.”
You nodded up at him, closing your eyes as he bent forward to press a kiss to your hairline. “I love you,” you breathed, placing a hand on your chest as if it would slow your racing heart.
“I love you too,” he responded before stepping out of the hospital room, following the directions that Penelope had given him in order to get up to the NICU.
Adrenaline made his stomach churn as he approached the NICU, wondering what he’d say to the people there until someone recognized him as The Dad. He still had to scrub his hands, but they let him through until he saw the bassinet. Even more, he saw the tiny baby kicking its legs inside of the acrylic container.
Emily stood by on high alert, ready to pounce on anyone who even looked at the baby funny, and Spencer just couldn’t stop staring. “Come here,” one of the NICU nurses said to him, obviously having been brought up to speed on the situation. With a smile on her face, she told him, “It’s a girl.”
“A girl,” he breathed, walking right up to the side of the bassinet.
The nurse nodded and adjusted the hat on her head, just slightly too big for the newborn’s head, “If you want, we can get you set up in a chair here, and you can give her a bottle.”
“Please,” he responded, earning another smile from the nurse, who had him take the crying baby in his arms before handing him the prepared bottle.
It broke his heart to watch how quickly she took to the bottle; he still wasn’t sure if she had eaten anything until this. He knew the nipple wouldn’t let her take in too much at a time, but in his subconscious, he was still worried about it being too much for her.
He rocked gently, “Hi, honey,” he cooed down at her.
“She’s a good eater,” the nurse observes, writing something down on a piece of paper. “We’ll keep an eye on her for just a little while, but we know how badly she needs to get down to her mama.”
Setting the now empty bottle down, Spencer looked up at the nurse, “Is she okay?”
The nurse nodded at his concern, “She’s on the small size, but she’s full term. Of course, not everything is going to be noticeable right away, but we did a full newborn exam on her and all of the tests say she’s a perfectly healthy baby.” She looked on as Spencer gently cupped the baby’s head, “Does she have a name?”
You and Spencer had made a deal, he would pick a boy’s name, and you would pick a girl’s name. Smiling softly, he murmured her name to her for the first time, “Genevieve,” he answered. A big name for such a small baby, maybe, but it was the name you had chosen.
He started making his way back down to you, feeling like he was floating through the taupe hallways of the hospital before he finally made it back to your room. Penelope excused herself when he emerged in the hallway.
“Spence,” you whispered, looking up at him with hope in your eyes for the first time since you had woken up after surgery.
Smiling at you, he sat on the edge of your bed, “Five pounds and fifteen ounces. Seventeen and a half inches long. Perfectly healthy.” He glanced behind him as he heard the wheels of the bassinet coming toward your room, turning back to watch your reaction as you saw your baby for the first time.
He was glad for his eidetic memory, he’d never want to forget the way your face lit up with recognition, “Oh, a girl.”
With the baby settled on your chest, there was nothing better for the two of you to do than watch her sleep. Every once in a while, she’d coo or squawk and immediately capture your every attention all over again. “How are you feeling?” Spencer asked you. The blood transfusions had been completed, leaving you on a course of broad-spectrum antibiotics, fluids, and lots of pain medication – two of which prevented you from breastfeeding. Although, because of her size and traumatic birth, the NICU doctor suggested that some formula would help her grow properly.
You hummed contentedly, “Tired. I hurt just about everywhere,” you admitted, not taking your eyes off of your newborn. “I’m so… just grateful,” you whispered, “Is that odd?”
“No,” he shook his head, “I know exactly what you mean.” For as terrible and horrifying as the entire ordeal was, it could’ve been much worse. He almost lost both of his girls in one day.
“Does the team want to meet her?” You asked, worried about entertaining guests with the baby.
Spencer chuckled softly, keeping his index finger pointed within Genevieve’s reach, testing her palmar reflex, “I’m sure they do, but we’ll wait and see how you feel tomorrow and revisit. Okay?”
Your head bobbed in confirmation, watching as your daughter very slowly woke up, “Hi, Vie,” you greeted her quietly, gently rubbing her back with your fingertips. You didn’t have the strength to fully hold her, but she was more than happy to just lay on you, “Sweet, sleepy girl.”
“Do you want me to take her, and you can get some sleep?” Spencer offered, noticing the way you were trying to hide a yawn from him. “We aren’t going anywhere, we’ll stay right here in this chair,” he reassured you based on the apprehensive look you were giving him.
Slowly, you nodded, helping as best you could and pouting in sympathy when Genevieve – Vie – cried out at the sensation of being moved from her warm spot on her mother’s chest to the warm spot in her father’s arms. Thankfully, the newborn calmed down just as soon as Spencer settled her in his arms, “Don’t go,” you whispered, letting your eyes fall shut as you allowed sleep to wash over you.
He hummed, “We won’t,” he muttered in response.
Sleep took you with little resistance, leaving him with Genevieve in the silence of the hospital room – save for all of the machines that you were still hooked up to.
She wouldn’t be up for much longer herself – newborns spent most of their day sleeping – so Spencer took his opportunity to watch her eyes wander around the hospital room. “You can go back to sleep too, little love. I’ll watch over the both of you,” he spoke to her in a reverent tone and adjusted the hat on her head. “I’ll keep you safe, Vie. No harm will come to you, not as long as I’m your dad.”
#criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid angst#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#criminal minds fic#criminal minds angst#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid dilf agenda#written by margot
2K notes
·
View notes