#8 BEST WINTER ESSENTIALS EVERY MAN NEEDS

[diamondintherioux]

9/5/24

6 months post op

Well ladies and gentlemen, we made it. Six. Months. Post. Op. Wow. What a journey it has been. I feel like I’ve lived 3 different lives.

This new body has given me what I always knew I had, shape. Real feminine shape that makes clothes actually fit my body. It’s crazy to think how diet and exercise truly couldn’t give me this body. I feel like I’m a butterfly floating through life. My jean size is smaller than what I wore in high school (granted I do think sizes are “bigger” nowadays.)

It’s peak* week for me because next week I’m leaving for vacation but I’m already thinking about what I’m going to do when I come home. For the past decade, every winter no matter how hard I try I always gain 10 lbs lol then I spend the spring and summer trying to lose it. Rinse and repeat. This year will obviously be different. I have a plan. When I come back I’ll be wearing my faja 12 hrs a day (basically to curb my appetite from the compression.) I will up my personal training 2x a week. I want to do private Pilates classes 2x a week. I bought a walking pad so no excuses to not get 10k steps but in the winter I want to aim for 20k steps a day. Half inside half outside. After that is my meal plan. Prioritizing protein and water intake. I’ve been slacking as per usual lol my lack of protein amps up my sugar addiction to supplement for my hunger lol I know it’s not funny and actually fucked up. I blame my mother for not cooking when I was younger and subsequently not teaching me.

In addition to fitness and nutrition I need to unclutter my mind. I have wayyyy too much stuff. Clothes, shoes, bags. I’m going to do a fall cleaning and donate everything. Even the designer stuff. I have to make a promise to myself; no more secondhand shopping. I get it, trust me, more than anyone how “good” it is for the environment. But I do believe there is a spiritual aspect to it that is negative. Bringing someone’s thrown away trash (essentially) into your scared space, onto your body. It’s bad. I’ve been thrifting / vintage shopping since 2011 and let me tell you I’ve accumulated so much shit lol it’s just not fun. Yeah you’re saving a buck but who gives a fuck? lol in the grand scheme of things when you get older you won’t want another person’s trash. Trust me. There’s a reason why rich people always remodel the homes they buy.

Beauty maintenance also starts in the winter. Stringent morning and nighttime routines. Red light therapy. Facials. Chemical peels. Micro-needling. Lasers. Lymphatic massages. I really want an eyebrow lift. I was thinking about getting an eyebrow transplant but I think an eyebrow lift is the way to go. Investing in your body > clothes/bags. Trust me

To circle back, this new body has changed my life. My job is to now maintain it and make sure it only gets better. You work out in the winter to show off in the summer. Next summer I want to be on a super yacht off the coast of Italy in the tiniest Brazilian bikini known to man. I want to take a photo 1 year post op and see how much I’ve changed. I want to lose 10lbs and then I truly think I’ll be happy (I swear I’m not crazy)

It’s so wild going from a size 6/8 to a 2/4 lol plastic surgery is so worth it if you do it slow, go to the best, and make tweaks

*peak week entails

Mani + pedi

Hair Botox

Brazilian wax (will get laser when I get back)

Eyelash extensions

Facial

Due to the location I going to I’m not getting a spray tan but that would usually be on the list.

[onlinerakhiandgiftsstore]

Perfect Christmas Gifts for Him: Thoughtful Ideas for Every Type of Guy

Christmas is a time for giving, and finding the perfect gift for the special man in your life can be both exciting and challenging. Whether it’s your partner, father, brother, or friend, selecting a present that truly expresses your love and appreciation can leave a lasting impression. If you're looking for unique and thoughtful Christmas gifts for him, look no further than Rakhi.com. We’ve curated a collection of gifts that suit a variety of interests, ensuring your gift is both meaningful and memorable.

Here are some amazing Christmas gift ideas to make this festive season extra special:

1. Personalized Gifts: A Touch of Thoughtfulness

Personalized gifts are always a hit. They show that you've put extra thought into your present. From custom-engraved bracelets and keychains to photo frames featuring a cherished memory, there are many ways to give a gift with a personal touch. A customized wallet with his initials, a monogrammed mug, or a personalized message on a leather journal are all excellent options that will make him smile every time he uses them.

2. Tech Gifts: For the Gadget Lover

If he’s a tech enthusiast, consider getting him the latest gadget or accessory that aligns with his interests. Whether it’s a set of high-quality wireless earphones, a portable Bluetooth speaker, or a smart gadget to help him stay connected, tech gifts are always appreciated. You could also look into smartwatches, fitness trackers, or even cool accessories for his phone or laptop. These gifts combine utility with style, making them perfect for Christmas.

3. Gift Hampers: A Taste of Luxury

Gift hampers filled with his favorite treats, beverages, and pampering items are a fantastic way to spoil him during the holidays. Rakhi.com offers a selection of gourmet hampers that include chocolates, premium snacks, and refreshing beverages that will delight his taste buds. Whether he’s a fan of sweet treats, savory snacks, or indulgent cocktails, there’s a hamper tailored for every taste.

4. Fashionable Accessories: Style Meets Function

Does he appreciate fashion and keeping up with trends? This Christmas, treat him to a stylish accessory that complements his wardrobe. From sleek leather wallets and belts to classic wristwatches, sunglasses, and scarves, fashionable accessories make for great gifts. Choose a timeless piece that matches his personal style, and he’ll love it for years to come.

5. Outdoor & Adventure Gear: For the Adventurer

If your special someone loves spending time outdoors, gear related to his favorite activity is sure to make him happy. Whether he’s into hiking, camping, or sports, you can find gifts like backpacks, thermos bottles, or camping gear that will enhance his experience. A high-quality pair of hiking boots, a portable tent, or a multi-tool kit could be exactly what he needs for his next adventure.

6. Books: The Gift of Knowledge

For the guy who loves to read, a carefully chosen book can be the perfect Christmas gift. Whether he’s into fiction, self-help, or professional development, a great book is always a thoughtful and meaningful gift. Pair it with a cozy blanket or a custom bookmark for a complete gift package that he’ll enjoy during the cold winter nights.

7. Experience Gifts: Create Lasting Memories

Sometimes the best gift is an experience rather than a physical object. Think of giving him an unforgettable experience that the two of you can enjoy together. Whether it's tickets to his favorite sports event, a cooking class, or a weekend getaway, experience gifts create lasting memories that will be cherished far beyond the holiday season.

8. Grooming Kits: For the Well-Groomed Gentleman

A grooming kit is an essential gift for the man who likes to look his best. High-quality shaving kits, beard care sets, or skincare products can elevate his daily routine and help him feel refreshed. Opt for a grooming set that includes everything he needs to stay sharp and polished.

9. Fitness & Wellness Gifts: For the Health Conscious

If he’s focused on fitness, wellness gifts will surely be a hit. A yoga mat, resistance bands, or a set of dumbbells could help him reach his fitness goals. For something more luxurious, consider a massage gun or a membership to a local gym or yoga studio. These thoughtful gifts show you care about his well-being and encourage him to take care of himself during the holiday season.

10. Sentimental Gifts: Gifts that Speak to the Heart

Sometimes, the most meaningful gifts are the ones that come from the heart. Sentimental gifts like custom-made photo albums, framed memories, or heartfelt letters can leave a lasting impact. These gifts often carry more emotional value than material items and are perfect for deepening your bond.

Wrapping Up

At Rakhi.com, we understand the importance of finding the perfect gift for him this Christmas. Whether you're looking for something personalized, tech-inspired, fashionable, or experience-driven, our curated collection has something special for every type of guy. Take the stress out of holiday shopping and find a gift that will make his Christmas unforgettable.

So, what are you waiting for? Head over to Rakhi.com today to find the ideal gift for the man in your life and spread some festive cheer this holiday season!

[nyortor]

Beneficial Aspects Related With Zinc  Supplement

Zinc can be a organic mineral that’s essential to enhance immunological do the job. Supply you put a stop to acne pimples by reducing unnecessary grease growth. It is typically comfortable with manage the common cold but is regularly evident in over-the-counter products towards the winter flu.

Your best zinc supplements are meant due to respectable businesses that have the freedom relating to manufactured preferences, colorings, combined with chemical preservatives and then have passed through third-party trying for purity and then efficiency. Make sure you hire a program that is at least 15 milligrams of zinc per serving, the particular advised day-by-day allocation to older people. You can find various vitamins where you can decide to try facilitate improve your zinc certifications, which includes tablets, lozenges and essential. The liquid options are significantly utilized for which they breath headache taking pills. As well as gummies coupled with chewable tablet pcs you can drink or eat. Individuals who wish to know zinc supplement side effects, they often go here.

Thorne Zinc Picolinate - For individuals who value a real zinc supplement that’s really absorbable, Thorne’s Zinc Picolinate is the best pick. This product can be NSF Certified meant for Athletic activity and they have a substantial dose for zinc picolinate that’s however inside of the bearable increased use stage. The company can take exceptional being proud inside the sciences and even labs, and every single unit goes thru some rounds for assessments ahead of the software arrives at holders. This element helps these folks make accreditation because of NSF International and Australia’s Therapeutic Goods Administration.

What's more , features added leucine, a branched-chain amino acid that will helps renal system and muscle applications if in combination with zinc. It’s not cheap, yet it’s value the money if you want a excellent quality, well-absorbed pill. Moreover tend to recommend Nature’s Way Zinc Capsules if you are searching for any zinc supplement that’s all to easy to have coupled with doesn’t include man-made types or sometimes sweetening. These kinds of refills are generally gluten in addition to dairy-free and so are all too easy to undertake by working with food stuff or perhaps drinking water.

Metagenics Zinc Liquid Drink - It water version of zinc happens to be an easy-to-take, effortless path to fulfill all of your nutritionary really needs. It comes with a 15 milligram dose that the actual RDA together with produces additionally ascorbic acid, mineral deposits and then thrive probiotics.

The information is going to be recognized as a result of NSF World, indicating it has got undergone arduous evaluation to get contaminates higher metals prefer arsenic and also cause. It’s even healthy for the purpose of pregnant women tough but are through iron deficiency anaemia. Individuals that aspire to fully understand best zinc supplement company, they will likely go here.

True Cellular Zinc 7 - If you are searching to have a high-quality zinc supplement that hopefully will boost your defense and give you very good relax, True Cellular Zinc 7 is the ideal solution. Visit it for a blend of 7 fundamental varieties zinc which often motivates all-around health.

Despite the a lot of advantages among zinc, it's a challenge to soak up enough volumes of this important compound as a result of food stuff supplies. Sorry to say, phytates usually in most goodies crisis into the zinc ions and these items provided by possessing absorbed into the entire body. Zinc7 is actually engineered to break this approach vicious loop and be certain you're receiving a sufficient amount of zinc from your most desirable shapes. Very low extraordinary mixture 8 forms of zinc to help boost your immune system, increase your desire, which help you get shedding weight leads to a safe and natural manner in which.

[elioministeri]

8 BEST WINTER ESSENTIALS EVERY MAN NEEDS | MUST-HAVE 2021

8 BEST WINTER ESSENTIALS EVERY MAN NEEDS | MUST-HAVE 2021

8 BEST WINTER ESSENTIALS EVERY MAN NEEDSFirst of all, I suggest you to keep you warm and stylish. Men’s essential apparel in winter should be comfortable and classy. Neutral colours without any logos. Get yourself a pea coat, very trendy lately, or wool overcoat. Also you should have at least a wool suit, perfect for a special day/event or for a date! Turtleneck, oversize hoodie or a cable…

[marvelandimagine]

I think some people mad about the arm is not necessarily about the fact that Ayo disabling the arm itself, it's more of the fact that it was not necessary and the fact that Bucky had no idea they can do that. If I were to be honest, I think it was not that necessary because Ayo is well capable of taking him down without having to disarm him and she is definitely not threatened by him. I think what some people find upsetting about that scene is the fact that it kinda comes off as Ayo putting Bucky in a position where it would make him feel like he doesn't have full control of his own body after all. The Wakandans, especially Ayo, T'Challa and Shuri had every right to feel betrayed and upset but the point is they should have told Bucky about how the arm can easily be disabled like that, they didn't know Bucky was going to set Zemo free when they gave him the arm and regardless of the things they have done for him and if they were ones who gave him the arm, they should have at least told him about it, because it's connected to him, it's a part of HIS body. It doesn't matter if it was necessary to disarm him or not, the point is they should have told him about it because apart from the fact that it's his body and that it was a bit insensitive given his history, it's also a point of vulnerability, and the fact that she did it in front of Walker (and possibly Zemo) --- people who can easily turn on Bucky, could easily that to their advantage and attempt to disable it themselves. Just my thoughts on it.

Thank you for sharing your perspective, anon!

I’m going to use this long-ass reply to address this stuff with Ayo and also voice some thoughts I’ve had over the past few weeks seeing people paint Bucky into being this complete soft and harmless human that needs 25-7 protection which I don’t jive with — and this is me, a complete Bucky stan.

Many moons ago, I saw a post that compared 1940s Bucky moving with stealth and a loaded gun on the train to the Winter Soldier doing the same thing, essentially discussing the similarities and debating how much of non-brainwashed Bucky was in the Soldier. And I think the fandom forgets or chooses to neglect the following when painting him as this fragile, peace-loving guy:

Bucky was an incredibly skilled sniper in the United States Army. His job is to eliminate threats in the most efficient way possible, and he’s good at it. HYDRA gets their hands on him and + the serum, this gets magnified. It wasn’t like HYDRA turned him into someone with the ability and mental capacity to kill — that was already there. The brainwashing and torture just carved out the rest of him to leave those honed skills and an amplified ruthlessness with no moral issues, no sense of self to contend with. That ruthlessness is part of Bucky, whether people like it or not.

When Bucky is outside of HYDRA for the first time and hiding in Civil War and gets attacked, he’s so brutal in his actions that Steve Rogers, the man who literally was ready to die to save Bucky and free him when no one else believed in the good in him, intervenes because “Buck, you’re going to kill someone.” Bucky responds that he’s not going to kill anyone, but the fact remains: with or without HYDRA control, Bucky has a strong capacity for violence that hovers on brutality — again, what’s the most efficient way to eliminate or neutralize a threat? Like, I don’t want to kill you, but I’ll knock your ass out with cinder blocks to the chest.

Bucky has a good heart, he’s loyal, he’s smart, he’s caring, he’s the longest-standing POW in history and was turned into a slave for decades, put through unimaginable trauma and torture and horror with no escape. Bucky is also a strong and incredibly skilled super soldier who has a bionic arm, is a trained sniper, is unnervingly precise with knives, and self-describes himself as “semi-stable.” Zemo notes in the bar that “it didn’t take Bucky long to get back into form,” and he’s right because the ruthlessness and skill of the Winter Soldier is a part of him and always has been. We see it when he has his hand around Zemo’s neck and tells him he will kill him, when he rips the glass from his hand and throws it across the room.

And I’m sure the Wakandans know all this about Bucky, this light and his ability for hard-to-stop violence, whether from talking to Steve and Bucky or doing their own homework. And they still choose to help him out of the goodness of their hearts because he’s been put through hell and they believe they have the capacity to help him and it’s the right thing to do — they’re betting more on those positive attributes. And they put a failsafe on his arm, a literal weapon, and chose not to tell him. You know why I think that shows how much they did care about him? Because they could’ve blatantly come out and said “Hey, we don’t trust you,” and hurt him outright, but they didn’t because they’re betting on the light in Bucky to outweigh the dark or any future manipulation. That it’s a worst-case scenario function they hope to never have to use — so they’re prepared if shit hits the fan, and if it doesn’t, Bucky doesn’t have to be hurt feeling like he can’t be trusted. I see no issues here, they’re just being cautious.

Now coming to Ayo, my QUEEN Ayo. From that beautiful, beautiful opening scene, we get to see her support, her reassurance, her belief that Bucky will be able to work through this, even when he doesn’t believe it himself. She watches him fight and struggle and cry, and you can feel the hope in her and how moved she is when she gets to tell him it worked, he did it — he’s free. And she says it not once, but twice. And you can hear not just the comfort, but the PRIDE and warmth in her voice directed to him, who I’m sure she’s watched throughout the whole deprogramming process and gotten to know and is happy to see him work through the pain and come out on the other side.

And then she sees that same individual make a decision in freeing Zemo that she perceives as a “fuck you” not just to her country, but to her, someone who was charged with protecting her king. She could’ve just disarmed Bucky the second they met up, but she doesn’t. She takes the time to explain her side and her feelings, her guilt and her shame, and basically implies that she feels betrayed by Bucky because Wakanda helped him and now he’s doing something that’s hurting her country. And still, she doesn’t attack or just go get Zemo. She gives Bucky the benefit of the doubt and a whole 8-hour American workday to do what he has to do because again, she believes in the best of him. And then that time limit runs up, and he chooses to get in her way.

And that’s the final straw. She’s angry, she’s guilty, she’s frustrated, and she feels betrayed hurt by someone I think she did respect and care about, someone whom she worked with and helped and supported when he was his most vulnerable. Did she “need” to disarm the arm to fight Bucky? Probably not. But is she doing it in the heat of battle and adrenaline and a whole bucket ton of emotions, including what she sees as the White Wolf blatantly disrespecting her country and her as a person and even friend and she just says fuck it, I’m done? You hurt us and me, and I’m going to hurt you back? Oh yeah. And Bucky looks shocked, not because he’s a poor fragile baby and “oh no, my arm, how could you?? my TrAumA”, but in the dual realization of “oh shit, how’d you do that?!” and “oh shit, I think I crossed a line here.” And also, I don’t think a single person in that room would be able to recreate the disabling sequence other than Ayo — it’s way too targeted and specific for someone like Walker to pick it up in the whole three seconds it took.

People need to stop reducing characters to these black and white extremes of soft and hard, of good and bad. Doing so completely devalues and ignores the REALITY of the complexity of being human, and Bucky and Ayo are both great examples of that played by stellar actors who portray that range and depth extremely well. End of the day, my thought is that the failsafe in the arm was justified and people need to stop coming for Ayo based on this ridiculous narrative that Bucky is too traumatized and sensitive and too much of a fave to ever be challenged or he’ll explode into dust. Boy deserves a life of freedom and healing and mental health support, but he’s also still a formidable opponent with the capacity for violence and skillset to kill. People are more than one thing.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk!!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

All of Maz’s sidekick identities, ranked

I needed an excuse to rewatch SheZow (you guys remember SheZow? The “No, we have Danny Phantom at home” of cartoons?), so this is what I’m doing today. SheZow’s best character

Uuuuh second best character

A Character

and the various sidekick personae he cycles through in the attempt to find the perfect one to support his superhero best friend. JUST LIKE A BEST FRIEND SHOULD.

Ep 2: Meteor/Meatier Man

Not well thought out in a city with so many off-leash dogs, but he is impressively competent with those sausage string nunchucks. 8/10.

Ep 3: Dan-o-flage

Reeeally reaching for that pun. Even the characters in the show are unimpressed. Name’s not even Dan. Camo is uninspired, but gets leeway for having very little warning of the bank robbery and essentially having to ad-lib this. 4/10.

Ep 4: Shaverine

SHAVERINE. 10/10.

Ep 5: The Grip

Ready supply of duct tape (always useful), and those clamps do hurt so he has offensive capabilities. Unfortunately it’s hard to look like a threat when your costume is “guy stupid enough to duct tape his own hair”. 6/10.

Ep 6: The MAN(icurist)

Given Guy’s complicated relationship to his own masculinity as a stereotypically masculine guy forced into the role of a stereotypically feminine superhero, social support is important. Also Guy’s lack of nail care spawns a major series villain in this episode, so Maz was on the right track here. 9/10.

Also ep 6: Whatever This Thing Is.

Didn’t catch the name of this one. Don’t want to. 1/10.

Ep 8: Major Flouride

The costume’s not as impressive as some, but Major Flouride is a lot more proactive than most of Maz’s costumes. Also gives us the Totally Correct Fact that flouride comes from Florida. 8/10

Ep 10: Time Travel Boy

Not even trying for a pun, Maz? It’s a time travel episode. Bring your A game. 1/10

Ep 11: The Prisonerrrrrd

He was imprisoned at the time, so outfit options were limited. Also, busted everyone out in this outfit, so extra points for usefulness. Stupid name though, and a sidekick essentially calling themselves “Designated Hostage” is just setting themselves up for failure. 5/10

Ep 13: Corduroy Boy

Now THIS is fuckin’ STYLE. 10/10.

Ep 14: Splatter Lad

Inventive. 9/10

Ep 17: Nick of Time

At least he has head protection. 5/10

Ep 20: Cupid

Presumably I don’t need to explain this obvious 10/10.

Ep 21: Ridi-cules

Bonus points for theming with Kelly’s far superior Her-cules costume. 8/10.

23: The Utensil

You’re literally calling yourself a tool, man. Get it together. 4/10.

Ep 24: Grease Monkey

You had so much you could do with a car-themed sidekick called the Grease Monkey, and this is what you chose to do with it. You’re better than this, Maz. 2/10.

Ep 25: The Food Court Jester

This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. 9/10.

Ep 26: Bizarra Capybara

Excellent choice of rodent, horrifying costume. This is some Five Nights at Freddies shit. 3/10.

Ep 28: Chick-Pea

It looks silly, but this costume got him adopted by a giant mutant pigeon social activist, an act that later saved them. Can’t argue with results. 9/10.

Ep 33: Spinodactoraptorsaurus

Not much to say about this one. 5/10.

Ep 37: McMaz

Just what this show was missing: Dr Seuss. 6/10

Ep 39: Pop Star

I can’t even tell what this outfit is made of, but it looks more practically constructed than some. 7/10

Ep 42: The Lawn Ranger

Good, he’s putting in effort again. 8/10

Ep 43: Helium Head

Living every child’s dream. 7/10

Ep 44: Wolf Bone

Why couldn’t Spinodactoraptorsaurus put in this kind of effort? 8/10

Ep 46: Freezer Pop’n’Lock

This is your normal incognito outfit with a winter jacket. This isn’t worthy of a persona name. 1/10

Ep 50: Super Duper Sticker Dude

I think the writers just stopped trying at this point. 1/10

Ep 51: Lost and Found Boy

Probably the best use that most lost and found objects will ever see. Impeccable style. 9/10.

Ep 52: Beardamus

Eh. Weak closer for a final episode, but fun name. 6/10.

And now, The Big Question. Not “which is the BEST SheZow sidekick outfit?”, because the tie between Shaverine and Cupid will never be broken. The big question is, “was making this really worth so many hours of my time? Was it worth rewatching about 9 hours of a charmingly mediocre, if dated, superhero cartoon for this?”

Yes. Yes it was.

[ladyartemesia]

Fic recs for taehyung? I love your stuff btw I’ve read them all uwu

As a beacon of extra-ness in an already extra world, I am entirely incapable of just recommending fics like a normal blog. No. I’ve got to wax on like a bloomin connoisseur. I have compiled some (but not all) of my favorite works in several different categories and sorted them accordingly. This crazy list is so long I had to add a “keep reading”... but I simply couldn’t bear to leave any of these off the list. They are all so good!

Fics have been divided into 8 categories. Some are under the cut. 

 ▨ FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS and FRIENDS TO LOVERS ▨  ▨ ARRANGED MARRIAGE ▨ ▨ FANTASY ▨ ▨ ANGST WITH A HAPPY ENDING ▨ ▨ HYBRID and ABO (alpha/omega) ▨ ▨ MULTIPLE PARTNERS ▨ ▨ NEIGHBORS AND ROOMMATES ▨ ▨ TABOO THEMES and DARK FIC (Sex Work/Power Imbalance/Very Unsafe Sex) ▨ ▨

▨ FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS and FRIENDS TO LOVERS ▨

Insomnia by @hobiwonder

This is one of those fics I read and literally could not stop thinking about. It is wildly hot and honestly hilarious. Poor reader cannot sleep and the beautiful bro she’s tutoring offers a rather unconventional solution.

(Ego) Hoe Chronicles: KTH by @suga-kookiemonster

Listen. If you find a niche fan blog devoted entirely to Ego Tae... I’m not gonna say it’s mine. But it’s probably mine. I once told suga-kookiemonster that I would literally read a story about Ego Tae going grocery shopping on a Wednesday night and I stand by that. In this lurid romp, the reader falls into the clutches of everyone’s favorite bohemian sex lord and he rails her into another dimension.

Falling, Falling, Gone by @johobi

Pining (mutual or otherwise) is not really my thing, but I would straight up read Jo’s laundry list if she posted it. As usual I was blown away by how everything she does seems somehow better than any other version of it. This reader is really unique as well, and her relationship with the wildly popular soccer star Tae comes to a sexy and hilarious head at a sort of bachelor auction. With sharp dialogue, delightful subtext, and fantastic side characters, you really shouldn’t miss it. It’s pretty much perfect.

A Friendly Favor by @baeseoul

This is the classic “teach me some sex for another woman” trope and it is done so well. Sweet best friend Tae is looking to benefit from your experience, but his is not the only world about to be thouroughly rocked.

Officer Kim and the Criminal Crush by @ddaengyoonmin

This is one of the best twists on childhood friends to lovers I have ever seen. Tae grows up to become a cop and reader grows up to be a societal menace. I won’t spoil it, but it’s the perfect blend of nostalgia, tenderness, and smut. This fic technically doesn’t have a name so I had to give it one to link it. It’s part of an AMAZING series Zoe did that I also highly recommend.

Out of the Blue by @jimlingss

This is one of those stories that blooms throughout the narrative until you are left with this gorgeous flower at the end. I loved the journey of these two characters. It was real and it perfectly captures the experience of finding your soulmate in the person you least expect.

Sin Pijama by @brilliantlybasicb

This fic is a switch culture fic. It is wild wicked hot and this Tae is unreal. I love the way he lets the reader think she is in control just long enough. It is a wild romp with an adorable sequel and honestly you should read it.

Girls Like You by @jjiminah

I was in jjiminah’s asks IMMEDIATELY about this fic because I had FEELINGS. The reader begins wordlessly teasing and tempting Tae on their morning bus ride every day until he is literally losing his mind. Everything that follows is fire. Jjiminah has hinted she will wrote more for these two and I NEED IT.

Sighs and Sonnets by @btsaudge

This fic is beautiful. Like it’s basically art. This is a bad boy who is bad for you. But he has the soul of a poet and the stroke game of a renaissance master. Bittersweet and seductive, this fic is a full experience.

The Text by @taetaesbaebaepsae

Tae is your friend with benefits but it looks like feeling may have been caught by one or more parties. When you attempt to soothe your aching heart with another pretty boy, Tae decides to stake his claim. This was very sexy. The whole fic was sexy.

▨ ARRANGED MARRIAGE ▨

Monster by @neonlights92

Monster and all of its companion series about each of the boys is one of those fics that I reread constantly and also just think about constantly. This is one of the best mafia AUs out there and it’s characters are vivid and unforgettable. Tae’s stubborn resistance to his lovely new wife in contrast with her quiet, clever strength really brings this story to life. A word of warning. The masterlist links are a bit messed up. To read part two you must click on part three. And to read part three must click on part four. The link to part four is at the bottom of part three (or you can just search it on her site. It is definitely all there though).

Dichotomy by @kpopfanfictrash

There is a reason the incomparable Shanna is on this list three times. She is truly incomparable. This is childhood friends-to enemies-to spouses and it is wonderful. I adore this Tae. He is sharp and vulnerable and occasionally heavy handed, but truly a gem. This fic also features one of the best angry sex scenes I’ve ever run my eyeballs across.

▨ FANTASY ▨

Chism by @kpopfanfictrash

The world-building in this story is genuinely awe inspiring. You could write series upon series within this vivid universe. The god of Winter is missing and Summer’s heat burns unchecked for many years. The reader is a warrior with a unique ability tasked with guarding a very interesting prisoner. This story is so good. I mean it is really bloomin incredible. It’s hard to say what I liked best about it, because it was stellar across the board.

Obsidian by @kpopfanfictrash

In the pantheon of delicious Tae incarnations, Obsidian Taehyung is essentially unrivaled as a grey witch who moonlights as a sexy rock star. His extremely erotic clash with a white witch detective plays out as the two of them track down a sinister killer (with the help of some truly memorable side characters).

Out of this World by @ddaengyoonmin

This one is really unique. Tae is a merman scientist on the water planet of Neptune and when the reader and her misguided crew crash into his sea, he takes it upon himself to improve inter-species relations. This fic features excellent world building alongside several twists and surprises. Clever scientist Tae is downright irresistible.

▨ ANGST WITH A HAPPY ENDING ▨

Picking Flowers by @jamaisjoons

So this story is a journey - truly a beautiful one and it’s a gorgeous addition to the hanahaki genre. There is real pain and I cried real tears, but gosh it was so sexy and so worth it. I was surprised by how truly immersed I ended up in this piece. I lost track of everything else. The end is insanely satisfying, but the journey is really what makes this fic unmissable.

Until Yesterday by @jimlingss

This fic destroyed me slowly then slowly put me together again piece by piece. When I say I went through it - I WENT THROUGH IT. The story is loosely based on the movie “The Vow” and it is just fantastic. Beautiful and tender till the last word.

The Foolish Muse by @bibbykins

This is the story of someone who is deeply in love, but knows they deserve better. It is a sexy and evocative work with allusions to mythology that fit seamlessly into the narrative. I think my favorite part is Tae discovering how much the reader meant to him and what choices ultimately lead them to a really delicious conclusion.

Back to You by @ladyartemesia

The last time I did a fic rec list, it got like 700 notes. Ya girl is not makin the same mistake again. I spent hours on this list. My work is comin along for the ride. Kim Taehyung is the love of your life, until one day he disappears without a trace.

Vacancy by @ppersonna

This one is the only idol AU on the list and I normally don’t read those, but Lindy’s work is too good to miss in any setting. I am thrilled I took a look because what I found was a glimpse into a beautiful relationship that weathers and eventually overcomes the challenges of loving in the limelight. There is a LOT of emotional depth and symbolism which really elevates everything about this lovely story. The reader’s internal struggles in the face of her lover’s fame are extremely well done.

▨ HYBRID and ABO ▨ (alpha/omega)

Eye of the Tiger by @opaljm

I am beyond hype about this story which is (very) loosely inspired by Zootopia and features a cocky tiger Taehyung and a fiesty prey hybrid he needs to fake date in order to keep panther Jimin from murdering him. (Tiger Tae got a tad too frisky around Jimin’s mate and now things are dangerously awkward.) This story is already so freakin good. I cannot wait for the rest.

Silver and Blue by @taetaewonderland

What happens when you get on the wrong side of the right werewolf? Very sexy - very crazy times. Chronologically this is the first of the Silver and Blue series which follows barely civilized were-Tae through his courtship and eventually his relationship with the spunky reader. Holla to all my impreg kink homies. This is the fic for you.

Heat Run by @ladyartemesia

As I said before, the last time I did a fic rec list, it got like 700 notes. Ya girl is not makin the same mistake twice. I spent hours on this list. My work is comin along for the ride. Alpha lawyer V is a man of many secrets, but his well ordered reality spirals wildly out of control when he crosses paths with a fiery omega set on saving the world from his wicked ways.

Beautiful Stranger by @interludemoonchild

This was a wild ride from start to finish. Taehyung is a tiger hybrid shifter who escapes from the circus to be close to a veterinary student he bonded with. There is a lot of interesting twists and surprises in this one. I was definitely screaming at the end.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell by @jingabitch

A very young wolf hybrid Taehyung adopts you as his pet human when you are just a kid. After Tae leaves to serve in the military he returns to an adult version of his sweet little princess and chaos ensues. Mind the tags for this one folks. It’s excellent, but there are very triggering themes throughout.

▨ MULTIPLE PARTNERS ▨

Level of Restraint by @lemonjoonah

This is not strictly a Tae fic in that he is only one of three major players in this twisted masterpiece. Lemon is the undisputed queen of the surprise twist and this one is truly brilliant. People dropped this fic in the discord calling it the best fan fiction they had ever read and I am not here to argue with them at all. Fair warning, every word - every inch of this fic is sexy and it’s delicious brand of titillation is wrapped around your psyche good and tight by the end.

Four by @luxekook

The quadruplets next door are fueling your very lurid fantasies. It turns out they have some fantasies of their own... You will need water if you read this fic. This is the original patented Kim Taehyung Horny Hive Mind 4D Experience™

▨ NEIGHBORS AND ROOMMATES ▨

The Heat Wave Series by @curly-bangtan

The original story (chapter 1) in this series is definitely famous, but I don’t know how many people have read all 9 chapters and if you haven’t, you are really missing the incredible journey of two very horny idiots stumbling recklessly towards real and amazing love. Everything is set off when the air conditioner breaks and a pair of wild roommates shed their inhibitions along with their clothes.

Flicker by @chimoona

So this fic started out with adorable neighbor dynamics and ended with erotic rope tying. Baby I was ABOUT IT. This was so bloomin hot and also like sweet and tender. Really a sexy and sentimental treasure.

Not Your Typical Flower Shop Story by @jungtaeyoongles

This story goes from “aww” to “WHAT THE-” real quick. Fast paced plot and twist after twist turn the whole flower shop au upside down and then inside out. I can’t say more because spoilers but like - WOW.

▨ TABOO THEMES and DARK FIC ▨ (Sex Work/Power Imbalance/Very Unsafe Sex)

Extracurricular by @ppersonna

One of my favorite professor-student AUs. The reader writes her gorgeous professor a borderline erotic analysis of several major works of art and he feels compelled to discuss it with her privately. Lindy really outdid herself on this one. It is scorchin. Professor Tae is actually really sweet and somehow that just makes the whole thing hotter.

Akrasia by @nitaescence

This is insanely hot. Emphasis on the insane because it’s basically a super erotic romp where you have sex with a man you don’t know (Taehyung) on a crowded public bus. I literally felt my blood pressure going up the longer I read. Whew.

The Client by @jungkookiebus

This one hit me right in the feels. Taehyung is a sweet and lonely man who has a standing Wednesday appointment with an upscale sex worker. As the story progresses, feelings become involved on both sides. When I say I am checking her page thrice daily for part three... This is so engrossing. And this Tae. I just want to hold him.

Daffodil Dreams by @sombreboy

Tread carefully ladies and gents. This story is excellent, but it is easily the darkest fic on the list and, if you choose to read it, please read the trigger warnings carefully. The reader is a psychologist called in to analyze a very dangerous criminal. As their sessions progress, however, several boundaries are crossed.

Obey by @jjkfire

Taehyung is the most feared and ruthless member of the local mafia and you are the world’s most inept escort. You needed a job, but had no real interest in sex work and you’ve managed to fly under the radar as a glorified waitress until Kim Taehyung himself walks into your agency and decides that you’re the only girl he wants. Oh my gosh I loved this story so much. It was downright amazing and there is a surprise at the end that makes everything even sweeter.

[blouisparadise]

Here is a list of amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of January. Between the third month of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest and all the other fics that authors posted throughout the month, it’s clear that this was a great way to start off the year of bottom Louis fics!  Happy reading!

1) Leave It All Here In This Bed | Explicit | 1071 words

One of Louis’s many sleepless nights.

2) Games Are Only Fun If You Win | Explicit | 1554 words

Louis and Harry have a bet. If Louis wins that means he's off laundry duty. If he loses well.

Let's just say Harry won't be complaining.

3) If It Makes You Feel Alive | Explicit | 1691 words

Louis is horny one night on the tour bus so he and Harry fuck while trying not to get caught by the others.

4) Beg Me Silently | Explicit | 2140 words

“So, your boyfriend…is he planning a magic night for you at home?”

Louis snorts. “He’s not, actually. He’s pretty hardworking, you see, so he comes home late.”

“Such a shame.” Harry walks towards Louis, so close that they’re sharing the same space. “You’re so beautiful, Louis. If you were mine, I wouldn’t make you wait for me.”

5) Birthday Wishes | Explicit | 2895 words

Note: This is part 3 of this series.

The one where Harry takes Louis to dinner for his birthday, and gifts him with a vibrating butt plug he wears to the restaurant. Fluffy birthday sex follows.

6) New Year, New Beginnings | Explicit | 3577 words

Note: This is part 4 of this series.

The one where Louis and Harry unexpectedly end up at the same New Year's party. Louis makes Harry jealous, and Harry shows him just how bad of an idea that is.

7) Heaven In These Sheets | Explicit | 3557 words

Bunny Hybrid Louis has it out for his boyfriend’s phone.

8) Pits Of Love | Explicit | 3934 words

Harry smells Louis' sweat for the first time after they've moved in together. His alpha goes a bit wild.

9) First Blow Hits You Cold | Explicit | 3986 words

Louis wears a shirt with a big ass H on it for his livestream, and Harry really, really likes it.

10) Close Your Eyes And Surrender To Me | Explicit | 4209 words

Note: This is the sequel to this fic.

Harry hummed and pressed his lips to Louis’ forehead. “I am very stressed, but I also know you’re stressed and tired too.” He glanced to Louis’ face seeing the confirming nod. “But, if you’re sure you’re up for it.” Harry smirked, waiting for Louis to say it was okay before he laid the boy down on the bed and hovered over him. “I really love this color on you. You look so pretty. Always do.” He spoke quietly, rubbing his hands over Louis’ soft thighs and moving them to his tummy. He then moved his hands up to Louis’ hair. It had been a while since Louis’ last haircut and it was now long enough that he could tie it up in little ponytails and even little braids. Louis currently had two hair clips in his hair. One was gold with little stars on it and the other gold with a moon. “I love your hair princess. Do you feel pretty?” He asked.

11) P Is For | Explicit | 4349 words

Note: The pairing for this fic is Louis/Pedro Pascal.

Louis and Pedro, winter in New York, a coffee machine, and bilingualism.

12) Pull Out Your Heart | Explicit | 5028 words

He wants to apologise, the five letters sit on the tip of his tongue but he does not. It means nothing to either of them.

13) Loving You's the Antidote | Explicit | 5070 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 302: Alpha Harry & Omega Louis are divorced but still spend each other’s heat/rut together because they only really trust each other but things get complicated when Louis (or Harry, author’s choice) spend it with someone else. Cue angst with a happy ending.

14) Sweet Talk With A Hint Of Sin | Explicit | 5095 words

“What the hell are you wearing?” Harry had the nerve to ask, and Louis bristled slightly.

“Well, what the bloody fuck does it look like?” Louis snapped, breaking his seductive demeanor momentarily because he was wearing this ridiculous get-up for Harry. He had thought that this would go over well.

And now that the moment was here, it was going anything but.

Harry’s brain seemingly malfunctioned, completely unbothered by the fact that he was now standing in an actual pool of red wine, or that there might even be broken glass directly next to his feet. He was focused solely on his boy splayed out on their bed. “Are those ears?”

“Yes,” Louis mumbled, reaching up to finger the burnt orange fur of the fox ears. “And a tail,” he said, shifting to lay on his stomach so that his perky ass was on display, showing the way his lube slicked hole had been prepped and was now hugging the impressively sized plug attached to the fox tail.

15) New York's Beauty | Mature | 5274 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 104: AU where Harry is an alpha wolf and Louis is a hybrid kitten. They were roommates. While they were arguing about something stupid, Harry wanted to bend Louis over the kitchen table and knot him right there. He slowly accepted his feelings and extreme desire for Louis, so he started to tease the hybrid until he would beg Harry to fuck him. They fall in love.

Louis needs to feel comfortable with the camera so harry fucks him until he is blushing and calm and gentle.

16) I Went Astray To Make It Okay And He Made It Easy | Not Rated | 5537 words

Note: This is a sequel to #17 on this list.

Harry makes sure to put on his blue truckers hat that has 'if you ain't a fisherman, you ain't shit' printed on it to hold back his hair out of his eyes. He remembers when he came home after buying it and Louis went on for days about much he looked like such a Dad. He made sure to fuck him hard that night and show him that he's a fucking DILF not just a Dad. 

17) You Make My Heart Beat Like The Rain | Explicit | 6611 words

Note: This is the prequel to #16 on this list.

"You're stunning, eh?" Harry whispers, his Canadian accent thick with lust. It usually slips out when he gets horny because he knows it turns Louis on. Harry presses his lips into the curve of his neck. His hot breath makes Louis shiver. He opens his eyes and sees Harry's bigger, tattooed arms wrapped around him, completely engulfing his smaller frame—and, fuck, maybe he is up for it.

Why does his boyfriend have to be such a fucking DILF? He blames it on a twitter thread he read a few weeks ago.

18) Baby, Let Me Love You Goodbye | Explicit | 6837 words

Harry and Louis are going through a divorce after being together for 10 years, so Louis comes over to collect his things, and, well…what’s a little goodbye sex, just one last time?

19) A Place To Call Home | Mature | 8113 words

The thing is, he’s pretty sure he’s found home in a person in his life, someone who’s been essential in everything he’s done since he was seven years old. Through every broken bone, through every breakup, through every failure; through every triumph, personal and professional, and every goal he has scored in his time in Man U, there’s been someone there for it all.

That’s his best mate. Harry. A twenty-two year old with the kindest heart known to man, a slow drawl that is entirely too endearing, with the dreams to open up his own flower shop. A quiet and earnest boy with those he doesn’t know, and open and honest and absolutely lovely with those he loves.

It all hits him, really, the night of their final game of the Premier League. Again, timing is not his forté. They’re gearing up, ready to hit the field for the second half against Liverpool that determines their ranking in the League, when his brain decides to come online (after seventeen years, apparently), and conveniently supply him with the revelation that oh yeah, you’re kind of in love with your best friend.

20) To Love Without Reason | Explicit | 8854 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“Come on in, soldier,” Louis pats Harry’s chest and walks away, leaving Harry to follow behind.

Harry stands in the living room, looking around at Louis’ dwelling. Family pictures placed high on a shelf, certificates of Louis’ practice, and other trinkets that make Harry entirely too nostalgic.

“I have to warn you,” Louis says as he puts the kettle on, the water droplets from his hair trickling down the golden skin of his back. “The door jams if you lock it so you'll have to leave it ajar.”

Harry acknowledges with a soft hum, too entranced by Louis’ glistening skin to form a coherent reply.

21) It's A Game We Play In The Sheets | Explicit | 9426 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“Louis is… He’s a boy I’ve been talking to.” He bit his lip, grin evident. “After I watched one of his videos during a Harry Reacts a few weeks ago I messaged him and…”

His sentence was cut short by the sound of a timid little “Hi” being whispered into his ears.

Harry closed his eyes for a second, pausing to take in the online presence of the real-life fairy, before he opened them and smiled. “Hey Lou. Ready to play with me?”

22) One Track Mind | Explicit | 9911 words

“You have a lot of friends, huh?”

Harry nods again. “A few.” The muscles of his bicep flex under Louis’ touch, and the alpha looks a bit drunk from the feeling, his eyes blinking slower and lips quirking at the corners. He’s leaning in, his alpha scent surrounding Louis from all sides.

“Mm,” Louis hums, squeezing his fingers tight, just to hear the sharp way Harry inhales. Then, when Harry is least expecting it, Louis returns the earlier sentiment—leaning up on his tiptoes and pressing his weight into Harry for balance, drawing his lips up close to Harry’s ear, and whispering, “Why don’t you go tell them goodnight.”

23) See You When I Get Home | Explicit | 10308 words

"What are you thinking about?" He repeats Louis' question from earlier.

"You." Louis' reply comes out in a moan. It shocks Harry, and his brain scrambles for the right thing to do, the right thing to say. He doesn't even know how to feel, or if he even heard Louis correctly.

"Me?"

24) Floating | Explicit | 10435 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

The one where Louis has control over water in every form but he doesn't know what to do with it. Harry is here to guide him.

25) I'm At Your Mercy Now (And I'm Ready To Begin) | Teen & Up | 10552 words

Where Louis' soulmark was leaked, Harry keeps his private. They're both famous popstars. Louis is waiting for his soulmate, Harry has a feeling it's him but Louis is completely oblivious.

26) You And I 'Till The Day We Die | Explicit | 10807 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 124: A fic inspired by Groupie Love by Lana Del Rey, where Harry is a Rockstar and Louis is his cute little boyfriend who tries to hide himself in the middle of the crowd. (Preferably set in the 80s)

27) Moonlit Sky Over Gentle Waters | Explicit | 11377 words

Harry left his hometown to sail the seven seas and returns seven years later, yearning for something — or rather, someone — that he isn't sure he can have.

28) Late Night Devil Put Your Hands On Me (And Never, Never, Ever Let Go) | Explicit | 11524 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Harry is a demon that feeds off of people’s nightmares. He finds his next meal in Louis’ dreams where he changes and molds them to become scary nightmares. Soon harry learns Louis is a lucid dreamer- he can act on his own in his dreams. They interact in the real world and have sex in the dream world. when the demon catches feelings for louis, he wants to live.

29) If You're Feeling Lonely | Explicit | 12807 words

The guest list is on the desk. Louis runs through it and stops a third of the way down, a familiar name catching his attention.

Harry Styles.

All he needs to do is confirm whether Harry Styles is the same Alpha whose scent left such a memorable impression on his body.

30) Want You To Play With Me | Explicit | 14335 words

"I'm quite not finished with you yet." Harry whispered right on the shell of his ears and squeezed the girth of his cock, making Louis shudder a sloppy puff of air as the tickling sensation ran through his spine, Harry was intoxicating. "Let me play with you a little more, Lou. I promise I'll give you what you want. Be my good boy, hm?" He slowly annunciated every word and licked a warm line on the nape of Louis' neck — Louis curled in his arms at that. Submitting himself a little bit more.

"Always wanna be your good boy." Louis whispered back and enveloped Harry's hand in his.

31) No Good Unless It's Real | Explicit | 17021 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is a very busy farmer who’s just trying to make it to his next nap and Harry’s the new hot vet that’s determined to infiltrate every area of his life.

32) Tennis Court | Explicit | 18285 words

Louis and Harry are co-workers and Louis is sure Harry hates him because he always refuses to help him with his heats.

33) Joker Is Wild | Explicit | 18444 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 390: A reality show AU where Louis, Harry, Liam, Zayn and Niall are selected to stay at confined in a luxury mansion for 1 month, where they are required to have explicit, graphic sex at all times, like a porn Big Brother kind of show. Every week there are several different sexual tasks and trials that they must overcome together, which all ends in orgasms for all of them. When the boys all discover Louis is strictly a bottom, and a slutty one at that, they all can’t wait to get their hands on him. Bonus if other hot celebs are there too, like Shawn Mendes, for example. Includes lots of hard gay sex, rimming, blowjobs, gang bangs, ass worshipping (Louis ass, of course) and double penetration.

34) Baby, Let Me Love You Goodbye | Not Rated | 20249 words

Louis almost calls Harry daddy. Cue denial, feelings, and way too much dirty talk.

35) Give So Much (Not Enough) | Mature | 24610 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“For my little lion,” Louis slid the smoothie bowl in front of Oscar, letting him dig in with his little hands. “And for daddy.”

He didn’t process the bowl in front of him, the push across the table causing a raspberry to roll off and fall on his lap, because Louis calling himself mummy may make him feel all sorts of mushy emotions, but Louis addressing Harry as daddy was suddenly having a very different effect on him. Since when did Louis saying daddy out loud render him speechless?

“Daddy’s still sleepy, but we’re up bright and early right Ossie?” Louis’ cooing shook him out of his daze. The man coughed, picking the raspberry off his lap and swallowing it with unintentional, and very unnecessary, eye contact with Louis. “Well, is it better than your protein smoothies and why?”

Harry chuckled, spooning another heap of the strawberry banana goodness into his mouth, “Way better sweetheart.”

A friends to lovers au with tons of mama Louis and domesticity.

36) Short And Sweet | Explicit | 29658 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is a shy university student in a world scarce of male omegas. He's always dreamt of having an alpha despite his sheltered upbringing, fantasizing about being loved and cared for. He's immediately smitten by the mysterious alpha with curly hair, broad shoulders, and the addictive coffee scent.

37) Under Thorn And Bramble | Explicit | 31931 words

Note: The pairing of this fic is Louis/OMC. This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 445: A historical AU where Louis is working as a servant on a farm. The family that owns the farm is exceedingly cruel to him and he is often exhausted and in pain from his work. A mysterious stranger boards at the farm and is very intrigued by Louis, but Louis doubts his interest in genuine. Any pairing fine.

38) Pink In The Night | Explicit | 32324 words

His finger was tapping on Louis’ chat before Harry could even think about it, eyes reading over the last text he’d sent Louis. I miss you. Do you miss me?

Harry had felt so pathetic that December night, alone in the dark room of the Japanese apartment he’d been staying at, the strong smell of alcohol clinging to his clothes.

Louis hadn’t replied, but Harry wasn’t surprised; he had texted Louis a few times before while he’d been away, but there had never been a response.

It pained him to admit that this was their new normal.

39) Coeur De Pirate | Explicit | 34207 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

He tilts his chin up as the Captain strides across the deck, his footfalls falling loudly against the planks. The crew watches them from afar.

Stepping into his space, the Captain wraps an arm around Louis’ waist and pulls him in. He lowers his head to breathe his words against Louis’ cheeks. “I won,” he whispers, “I’ve come to claim my prize.”

40) If The Sun Don't Shine | Explicit | 36330 words

In a world where you meet your soulmates in dreams, Louis has spent the last three years going to bed hoping to finally meet his, only to end up disappointed time and time again. It all changes with a violin.

41) The Pirate And The Piper | Explicit | 38396 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

The one where Harry is Hook, Louis is Pan, and nothing is what it seems.

42) Begged And Borrowed Time | Mature | 40198 words

Prompt 60: Time travel AU where Louis somehow gets thrown back in time and ends up in the dark ages, during the reign of the Styles family.

43) I Ain’t Gonna Fence You In | Mature | 40645 words

Louis Tomlinson is a 18 year old city boy who is forced to spend his summer before his senior year at his aunts farm. There, he meets Harry, a 19 year old country boy his aunt hired to help around the farm.

Maybe the farm isn't the worst place to fall in love?

44) Don't Want No Other Shade Of Blue | Explicit | 43285 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 339: it was foretold that Alpha Prince Harry would be mated to a beautiful male omega with eyes that could rival the stone amethyst, but Omega Prince Louis refuses to believe it.

45) No Easy Choice, But You’re Mine | Explicit | 44963 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is an omega hitman with one last job that goes a little sideways. Harry is the alpha bartender that looks a little too closely and cares a little too much.

46) Sedative Duty | Explicit | 46588 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Pop-star of the moment Louis Tomlinson is on his third-world tour. He decides to hire renowned professional dominant Harry Styles to unwind while on the road. In an effort not to raise suspicion by the crew, fans, and press, Harry pretends to be his bodyguard. He ends up being far more than that.

47) Just Always Be Waiting for Me | Explicit | 46837words

Note: Please be sure to check tags for any trigger warnings.

Harry Styles is a librarian at a private school who is not very devoted to his job but is very devoted to Louis Tomlinson, the resident English teacher, and has been ever since they met six years ago beneath a lonely streetlight.

Louis Tomlinson is a self confessed bookworm whose passion for Peter Pan, the literary classics and Harry Styles' happiness knows no bounds. He's self sacrificing, somewhat self loathing and haunted by a trauma he can't talk about.

Mutual pining abounds in this fic where a Peter Pan quote is never just a Peter Pan quote, caretaking is a love language and a platonic nude is never actually platonic. Louis has a kiss that belongs to Harry but he also has a painful past that might end up hurting them both.

48) Since The Future | Explicit | 48947 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

"It's done."

The words were barely above a whisper when they left Harry's mouth, but they hit Louis with the force of a freight train. It was done. Holy fuck. They had created a time machine. And tomorrow, they were travelling to the future.

49) Dirty Laundry Looks Good On You | Explicit | 50581 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

When Louis Tomlinson finds his clothes lying in a sad soapy mess on top of the washing machine in which they are supposed to be, he acts upon his anger and retaliates. What he doesn’t expect is having to deal with a six-feet tall, curly-haired and dimpled man in return, who seems to arouse confusing feelings within him and to make his life take an unexpected turn for the better (or worse?).

50) Hamartia | Explicit | 66970 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Six years is a long time for Louis to mend his heart back and erase every lingering, stubborn memory of his ex-lover, Harry Styles. But when news of the war being over spreads across the world like wildfire, and he stumbles upon the alpha he vowed himself to never see ever again, he realises that not even a lifetime will be enough for him to pick up the scattered, broken parts of his soul. He's far from expecting the alpha he loved to be struggling in the same way.

All the ointments in the world might never soothe the pain out, but it doesn't take long for them both to come to the conclusion that, maybe, the only medicine to their heartbreaks are what caused them in the first place.

51) Feeling Borrowed, Always Blue | Explicit | 68214 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis has been dreaming of his wedding since he was young - he just never expected it to happen like this. words

52) Mind Over Matter (You Under Me) | Explicit | 73825 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

It’s dark outside when Harry finishes practice for the day.

53) Rogue | Not Rated | 94992 words

Louis is a rogue Omega who's suffered through rejection and abuse for the biggest part of his life. He stumbles onto the Styles pack, quite possibly the kindness one he's ever met.

54) Chandeliers And Fake Smiles | Mature | 145010 words

On the brink of winning their first Grammy; up-and-coming rock band One Direction find themselves in the midst of the biggest scandal of their career - right before tickets for their world tour go on sale. in order to save their reputation, Louis Tomlinson must find it in his heart to forgive pop singer and heartthrob Harry Styles after his first impression rubbed him entirely the wrong way. after all, they cannot sell a relationship if it looks like they hate each other.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[withyouandthemoon]

HI ZORA BB💖 for the end of the year asks : 5, 6, 8, 9, 11, 12,

5. What creative work are you most proud of (your own or someone else’s)?

I am quite proud of the fact that I got back to writing at all lmao. I write sporadically at best, and the last time I wrote fiction before this year was in early 2019 (good times, sigh), so I’m just gonna pat myself on the back for trying.

I am still in absolute awe of Vice and Virtue by @galvanizedfriend. Every time I think back to it (the one chapter I read - I have two new chapters that I still haven’t found the time to get into my fault I knowwww) my mind just goes !@#@%$#^ cause it’s that good a masterpiece. And in my mind it’s canary yellow and pastel green like the color palette you used for the beautiful beautiful edit.

I also constantly think of this edit by @certifiedceraunophile. It’s so stunning!!! I’ve actually started writing something based on it, but well, you know... sporadic. It has become kind of a personal sanctuary though, to imagine an alternate universe that is so close to reality, but pandemic-free. In which Klaus and Caroline would be traveling in style and I could get my wanderlust quenched vicariously through those two.

6. Did you have any new ships this year?

Roy and Keeley! Definitely them. Other than that I can’t think of any new ships though. I’ve been rewatching the same old shows on loop for a while now lol.

8. What quote really sums up how you’re feeling at this point?

I’ve read from somewhere an excerpt of a letter Anton Chekhov wrote to his sister in 1898 after their father passed away. I think of it a lot these days:

Tell mother that however dogs and samovars might behave themselves, winter comes after summer, old age after youth, and misfortune follows happiness (or the other way around). A person can not be healthy and cheerful throughout life. Losses lie waiting and man can not safeguard against death, even if he be Alexander of Macedonia. One must be prepared for anything and consider everything to be inevitably essential, as sad as that may be. What needs to be done is to fulfill one's mission according to one's strength - no need to worry about the rest.

9. Recommend something that you really enjoyed in 2021.

Sitcoms. These are the “same old shows” that I’ve been looping all year. My forever comfort, Community and The IT Crowd and The Office and Miranda and Derry Girls. A special shout-out to Superstore, whose last season I just finished and it has one of the most heartwarming and fulfilling series finales I’ve ever seen.

Musicals sountracks! I depend on them to spark joy in me, seriously. A few that I constantly go back to this year: Come from Away (the last musical I saw live - again, how I miss 2019); Hadestown; Notre-Dame de Paris; and a recent fascination Sunday in the Park with George.

Flights by Olga Tokarczuk. I read it in Chinese, so cannot vouch for the English translation, but it’s hands down the best thing I’ve read this year. It got me through a particularly down period and for that I’m always grateful.

The dried bamboo shoots and dried shiitake mushrooms I had shipped from back home. God they’re good. Transcend every soup I ever make. Also I learned to squeeze a wedge of lime on my soups from Vietnamese restaurants (speaking of, I also praise the ultimate rainy chilly gloomy day comfort food pho) and it’s divine.

11. Name a fellow fan who you really appreciated this year.

You, Kait, of course!!! And also Nat @recyclingss. You two make everything better and brighter, and this year would suck a lot more without you guys. *a thousand and one hearts and kisses*

12. Share your wishes for your fellow fans in the new year.

Wish you all a safe and happy new year! No writer’s or artist’s blocks, no busy days, just a ton of amazing new content in every fandom that you’re even remotely interested in, and a lot of free time. And great food.

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About The Mitchells vs. the Machines

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier is up there as one of the best installments of the MCU. Sure, the action and CGI sucks, and the season finale could use a bit more polish, but there is so much more of what it does right. It brings up an engaging discussion through Karli; the bromance between Bucky and Sam is incredible; Zemo's surprisingly a riot, and U.S. Agent is a character whose inner psychology is something I would like to study. Plus, the series really dives deep into the themes of race and the realistic hesitance that comes with making a black man Captain America. It's easily an 8/10 series that is worth an in-depth discussion.

But f**k that s**t, because I'm talking about The Mitchells vs. the Machines instead!

I know it might be questionable that reviewing a movie starring a predominantly white family of idiots saving the world instead of the TV series about the powerful journey of a black man taking the mantle of an American icon...but this movie is fun, alright? And yes, I'm going to spoil it to explain how. So if you still have a Netflix account, I highly suggest you check it out when you have time.

Because, random people on the internet who most likely won't read this, this Ordinary Schmuck who writes stories and reviews and draws comics and cartoons is going to explain why The Mitchells vs. the Machines might just be my favorite film of the year (steep contest, I know).

WHAT I LIKE

The Animation: Let's get this out of the way right here and right now: If a single person ever tells you that this movie has awful animation, or the worst animation they have ever seen, just go ahead and assume that person is an idiot. Because holy hot cheese sticks, does this movie look amazing!

Say what you want about most of Sony Pictures Animation's movies, but you have to admit that they nail making a CGI movie looking like it could be in 2D. And The Mitchells vs. The Machines is the peak of that style. Every character in nearly every frame looks like they could work well if the movie was hand-drawn, and I love it. I am addicted to seeing films that look 2D with a 3D makeover because there has to be ten times the amount of effort to get that look just right, what with modeling each character in unique ways to nail that style wherein a hand-drawn film, you could just, well, draw it. Not to mention that the cell-shading and certain hand-drawn elements also add to the aesthetic.

Plus, there is so much attention to details, such as most of Katie's character model being covered in sharpie, or how you can see a hint of Eric and Deborabot 3000's drawn on faces even though their black screens are showing something else. Seriously, you can listen to any criticism this movie gets, but don't you dare let someone get away with telling you that it looks awful. It doesn't. It's incredible, and I SO wish that I could have seen it all on the big screen.

The Comedy: On top of being incredibly well-animated, this movie is also incredibly funny. Like, really funny. I shouldn't be surprised since it's made by the same people responsible for Clone High and The Lego Movie, but yeah, I found myself laughing, chuckling, and snorting with nearly every joke in the film. Not every joke works, to be fair. But because of the fast-paced humor, the bad jokes are almost immediately followed up with better ones soon after. What's even better is that the writers know when to take a break with the humor and let some surprisingly compelling drama take over. And even then, when there are jokes during the dramatic moments, they add sincerity to the scene rather than take anything away. Looking at you, The Amazing World of Gumball...I mean, I love you, but sheesh, you need to learn to let a solemn moment play out.

Anyways, the comedy is hilarious. And while I won't spoil every joke, I will go over some bits that might have gotten to me the most.

Katie Mitchell: Let's just go ahead and add Katie Mitchell to the list of characters I highly relate to on a personal level (which is getting longer by the minute, hot damn). But jokes aside, I really like Katie. Her love and desire to make movies is something I identify with, and her goal to just go to a place where she feels like she belongs is easy to understand. Trust me, if I found out there was a group of weirdos who like the same things I do and enjoy the things I make, I’d be willing to pack everything I have and go to them as fast as possible too. Plus, I feel like a lot of us can relate to a character who lives in a household where people question if our career goal is something we can make a living with. I remember two years ago when I told my aunt that I wanted to make my own animated series, and her reaction is a little too similar to Rick's when Katie showed him her movie. They mean well, but sometimes it's for the best to have a cheerleader rather than a critic, especially if that person is family.

Now, Katie isn't perfect as her enthusiasm can get a little annoying at times, and her desire to leave can be conceived as a little too harsh as well. Still, she's pretty cool and serves her role as a protagonist pretty well...also, if the movie gets a sequel, let's hope she and Jude become cannon by then. GIVE KATIE A GIRLFRIEND, DAMN IT!

Aaron Mitchell: But as great as Katie is, it's this goober that earns the reward for my favorite character. At times it looks like Aaron is nothing more than a source of comedy, but he handles some dramatic moments really well. Partial credit goes to Michael Rianda for that one. Yeah, having a child actor would have made Aaron sound more like a kid, but no other voice could have fit him better than what Michael offers as he comes across as weird but never obnoxious.

Also, let's give the writer points for making a character who is clearly neurodivergent. Yet also refraining from having him be annoying or useless to the rest of the cast. No one ever really disrespects or belittles Aaron and instead chooses to work with him rather than against him. Especially Katie, who forms a solid sibling bond with Aaron as a fellow weirdo. It's genuinely sweet to see, and I loved every minute that the writers showed that just because someone acts on a different wavelength doesn't mean they shouldn't be treated any less because of it. You get that with Katie, a little bit, but I see it much more with Aaron, for some reason. And I love him every minute, so that’s a win.

(Plus, I may or may not have had a dinosaur phase when I was younger, so go ahead and add him to the list of relatable characters too.)

Rick Mitchell: This is probably a character you will either love or hate, and I can see both sides of that argument. Because on the one hand, I really like Rick Mitchell. His motivation is clear and understandable from the first set of home videos with him and Katie, both near the beginning and the end. Sure, he messes up a lot, but he is still a man who cares deeply about his daughter, as well as his entire family. He gets to the point where he would make great sacrifices for all of them, especially Katie. Plus, it's just pleasant seeing a cartoon dad who isn't a complete idiot or overprotective regarding his daughter's love life.

However, there are times when Rick comes across as an irresponsible d**k. When he does things like smash the family's phones without telling them or giving them screwdrivers for "presents," you're either gonna find that funny or you won't. Personally, I enjoy Rick and his antics, and I have no problem with irresponsible cartoon dads. As long as they don't cross the line toward Modern-Peter Griffin territory, I've got no problem with dads like Rick, who I believe has never even got that bad. Still, some people might think differently, and I can't blame them. Because after getting great cartoon dads like Greg Universe, I can understand if some people won't be interested in characters like Rick Mitchell.

Rick’s and Katie’s relationship: Alongside the top-notch animation and gut-busting comedy, Rick and Katie's relationship is what I consider the movie's most essential asset. These two are the main characters of the film, and as such, they develop through each other. And what's crazy is that they have very conflicting goals. Katie wants to escape and be with her people, where Rich just wants one last chance to have a good memory with Katie before she leaves. To do so, they first have to understand each other. Katie has to learn why Rick is so desperate to spend time with her, and Rick has to realize why Katie is, well, Katie. What I love most about it is that they try. These two don't spend the entire movie arguing and being at each other's throats until a sudden "Oh" moment in the end. No, there are actual moments when they genuinely try to understand one another and fix their relationship. It's nice to watch, and I especially love when it cuts to Linda and Aaron celebrating each time Katie and Rick get closer to each other. When recommending this movie, I'd say come for the animation and comedy, stay for the phenomenal relationship building.

Monchi: There are probably people already comparing Monchi to Mater or the Minions due to being a comic relief with nothing else to add...but gosh dangit, do I love this little gentleman. Maybe it's because I'm a dog person, but I find Monchie to be incredibly adorable, and I will fight anybody who disrespects this king of kings. Probably not physically, 'cause I'm a wuss, but I will verbally. So WATCH IT!

“HeLlO. i Am DoG.”: Have I mentioned that this movie is funny?

Rick’s videotapes of him and Katie: And right there. Rick's motivation for everything is set in stone through a solid case of visual storytelling.

PAL: The writers do almost everything they should have with this character. PAL might not have the most creative evil plan in the world, but to me, a villain can have a generic scheme as long as they're funny. Thankfully, PAL is funny. Not only is the idea of a smartphone ruling the planet hilarious in all the right ways, but Olivia Colman delivers such a great cynical energy that the character needs. The way PAL reacts to people explaining why humans are worth living is just the best, and her flopping around in a fit of rage successfully gets to me.

If I had to nitpick, I'd say that I wish PAL had more of a meaningful resolution to her character. The movie builds up that she makes a big deal about Mark dropping her, so it feels weird that neither of them really get any actual closure with each other. I'll get more into that in the dislikes, but I wish PAL had more of a fitting end than just dying after accidentally getting dropped in a glass of water. Other than that, she's a great comedic villain for a comedic movie.

PAL MAX Robots: These guys are the funniest characters in the movie. Half of it is the bits of visual humor, while the other half comes from the solid line delivery from Beck Bennett. Especially with Bennett's and Fred Armisen's Eric and Deborahbot 3000. These two are definitely the comedic highlights, as nearly every line they say is both hilarious and kind of adorable at times. And just like with Monchi, if you dare disrespect these characters, I will fight you. Because they are funny, and I will not hear otherwise.

PAL demonstrating what it’s like to be a phone: Have I mentioned that this movie is funny?

(Don't disrespect your phones, kids. Otherwise, they'll try to take over the world.)

PAL turning off the Wi-Fi: Again, have I mentioned this movie is funny?

“I love the dog. You love the dog. We all love the dog. But at some point, you’re gonna have to eat the dog.”: It's the sick jokes that get to me the most. Everyone booing Rick afterward is just the cherry on top.

Attack of the Furbies: Have I. Mentioned. That this movie. Is funny?

Seriously, if you haven't lost your s**t during every second of this scene, then you never had to deal with the demonic entity that is a Furby. In a way, I commend you. But you also don't get to appreciate the comedic genius of all of this. So I also weirdly feel bad for you.

The Mitchells deciding how to celebrate: You don't have a real family if you spend more time arguing about how to celebrate after saving the world than you do about how to save the world. I don't make the rules. I just abide by them.

The PAL MAX Primes: There's not much to say about them. The PAL MAX primes look and act pretty cool, are brilliantly animated, and raise the stakes while still being funny at times. I love 'em, but I don't have much to analyze with them either.

The origin of the moose: ...I'd make the "I didn't need my heart anyway" joke, but to be honest, it's still shattered after WandaVision.

(For real, though, this is a really effective scene that establishes why Rick makes a big deal with the moose and why he might feel hurt that Katie is willing to disregard it completely)

The Theme of Technology and Social Media: There's a theme about how family is important, and working hard on making things work is worth the effort. But that's a bit too generic for my tastes, so instead, I'm gonna talk about the equally important message this movie has about technology. Because as twisted as she is, PAL makes a great point. The technology we have today helps us in a variety of ways. It's especially useful with sites like YouTube, allowing content creators like Katie to reach out and share their voices. The only issue with technology is how people use it. Take note that the main reason why the Mitchells stand a chance against PAL is by using her own tech against her. Yes, over-relying on all the advancements around us can be dangerous, but if we're smart with how we use them, we can get by just fine. This movie isn't about purging all technology like most robot apocalypse stories are. Instead, it's about using it correctly and not being helpless sheep the second the Wi-Fi gets turned off. Which might just be the most unique thing this movie has going for it story-wise (more on that later).

The Climax: The Mitchells vs. The Machines has everything that I think I climax should have. First off, it utilizes callbacks and jokes that I wouldn't have thought twice on actually coming in handy for how the Mitchells win the day. But showing that Monchi causes the robots to malfunction turns a pretty "eh" joke into a solid case of foreshadowing.

Second, everyone does something. Some characters do more than others, sure, but the fact that every Mitchell, even Monchi, has a hand in beating PAL and her robots is a great sense of writing to me. It shows that you really can't cut anyone from the main cast, as they each add value to how they are essential to the plot. Even Aaron, who arguably does the least in the climax, still manages to be the catalyst to what is easily the best scene in the movie. Speaking of which...

Linda Kicks Ass: By the way, that's the actual name on the soundtrack. I'm not even kidding. Check it.

Anyways, for the most part, Linda seemed like a decent cartoon mom. She's insanely supportive but still has the common sense to keep her foot down, like agreeing with Rick to stay safe in the dino stop the second the apocalypse starts. A pretty fun character, for sure, but nothing too noteworthy...but the second she loses her s**t, Linda Mitchell frickin' SKYROCKETS to the best-cartoon-mom territory! Believe me when I tell you that seeing her slice and dice robots like a middle-aged female Samurai Jack is as awesome as it is hilarious. Does it make sense how she can suddenly do this? No, but at the same time, who gives a s**t about common sense?! Because this moment was epic, and I don't think I'll ever get tired of watching it over and over again.

Rick Learning How to Internet...Again: I consider this the funniest moment in the movie. Trust me, the Furby scene is a close, close, CLOSE, second...but I think this scene was funnier.

The final goodbye: This is what I'm talking about when I say humor adds to the dramatic moments. The Mitchells saying "I love you" in moose is pretty funny, but it's also a sweet moment given that this is absolutely how this family of weirdos would say goodbye to each other. And, yeah, I got a little misty-eyed during this scene. Especially when Rick saw Katie pocketing the moose. That s**t just cuts deep, man.

Alex Hirsch Voices a Character: ...That's it. I look up to Alex Hirsh as everything I want to be as a creator, and the fact that his name is on this movie fills me with joy. He's also a story consultant, so that can also explain why the movie turned out as great as it did...although there are some imperfections.

WHAT I DISLIKE

Katie-vision: What's Katie-vision? Well, throughout the movie, we get to see how Katie views the world as there are these hand-drawn elements that look like effects Katie would add if she was the one who made the movie. At times it can be subtle and cute, like when this little beating heart appears when Katie is talking with Jude and her other friends. It's when the movie is in your face with Katie-vision does it get annoying. Like showing how Katie is lying about being certain she can drive up a vertical ramp or signifying what is the Rick Mitchell Special. Even if you justify that this would be how Katie would edit the movie, it still doesn't change how obnoxious these moments can be. For instance, Monchi is justified to be essential for the plot, but that doesn't mean people won't hate him...I'll still fight them if they do, but that's beside the point.

I can totally accept this being a personal issue, as I'm sure some people enjoy it. As for me, I think Katie-vision works best when used subtly instead of crudely.

The Meme humor: It's something similar here. Because some people like meme humor...but I don't. To me, it just dates your story if you reference memes even once. Now, a show, movie, or book being partially dated is nothing new. We Bare Bears, a series that I love, reference memes, apps, and social media constantly. Yet, the show still has a timeless feel to it as it doesn't rely on those references too much. The Mitchells vs. the Machines doesn't rely on memes as much either. But even then, that doesn't make a difference about how annoying that gibbon monkey joke was. Seriously, what the f**k was that? And how is THAT the joke that gets used twice!?

Underutilizing Mark Bowman: It really bothers me how this guy barely does much. I mean, Mark Bowman is the main reason that anything happens in the movie. Because he mistreated PAL, Mark acts as the catalyst for events to come. So the fact that he could have been written out the second PAL takes control doesn't make sense to me. It's worse since I could see more potential with his character through his relationship with PAL. These two could be anti-Rick and Katie, as Mark and PAL show what happens when people disrespect their family. So separating them halfway through the story, and keeping them as such, is a huge mistake as it results in neither having a proper resolution to their arcs. Like I said, Rick and Katie develop through each other, and the same could have happened with Mark and PAL. It doesn't, making it something that I can't help but feel disappointed about.

The Poseys: These are characters I feel like work better with multiple appearances. Sure, they only have the one joke about being a perfect family, but at the same time, you can make a joke like that work. Look at Yvonne from Shaun of the Dead (Which might just be my favorite movie). That's a bit-character whose only purpose is showing how better she is than Shaun despite being in an eerily similar situation. But she works well as we constantly see how great she's doing in every instance we see her. The same could be done with the Poseys, as using a similar joke for one scene is underutilizing great potential to make an already good movie into a better one.

Plus, if you're gonna shoehorn in a romance between Aaron and Abby Posey, the least you could do is have more than one scene developing that...just saying.

Katie’s and Rick’s “Oh” Moments: I want to make it clear that I actually like these scenes. They're well written and effectively emotional. My problem is that they also happen two seconds apart. There's nothing wrong with having a character realize the error of their ways through a tear-jerking moment. It's a popular tactic for a reason. And given how both Rick and Katie are the protagonists, they both need their own "oh" moment. But you gotta space them out, as it makes things easier to see the emotional manipulation that you're clearly trying to pull on the audience. They work, but putting them back to back is an issue easily solved with at least two minutes of padding, not two seconds.

Katie’s Death Fakeout: This is one of the few instances that a joke doesn't work in the movie, made even more annoying with the fact that I could see the punchline a mile away and kept thinking, "Just get to it already." I'm pretty sure no one bought this, especially when Katie didn't look like she could have gotten killed in any way after throwing PAL. It's poorly handled and proof that even the funniest comedies have a stale joke every now and again.

Nothing New is really being done here: Keep in mind that in terms of style, this movie is incredibly innovative. And here's hoping future animated projects can take notes. But narratively speaking? Yeah, there's nothing really new that this movie is offering.

A story about how technology will be the death of us? Been there.

A story about a group of idiots miraculously saving the world? Done that.

A story about a father forcing their teenager on a road trip so they can spend quality time with each other, thus ruining the teen's chance of hanging out with their girlfriend? Believe it or not, I have seen A Goofy Movie...multiple times...both as a kid and as an adult.

Now, I have no issue with a movie's plot being a bit by-the-books, and in some cases, cliche. If done effectively, and if I still have a good time, I don't think there’s much to complain about. And there isn't with The Mitchells vs. The Machines. The problem lies with that I'll forget this movie along with the dozens of others like it in a couple years. Which might just be the biggest issue any film can have.

---------------------

Overall, I'd give The Mitchells vs. the Machines a well-earned A-. It has nitpicks, sure, but it's still a blast to watch. It might not be innovative or groundbreaking as movies like the last Sony Pictures Animation movie, Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse. However, it is fun. And when the world is burning down around us, it's nice to have a fun movie that can distract us from all of it. So feel free to log in to Netflix the next time you're in the mood for a film that is great for the whole family. You won’t be disapointed

(And I will talk about The Falcon and the Winter Soldier pretty soon. I just needed to get this out of my system first.)

[ultrahpfan5blog]

Rewatching TDK Trilogy

Easily my favorite superhero trilogy and arguably one of my favorite trilogies of all time. I think in terms of superhero trilogies, Captain America is the one that comes closest because I love all three movies, but they aren’t a trilogy in the normal sense in that Civil War is essentially Avengers 2.5 and neither Civil War nor Winter Soldier can be understood without having watched Avengers and Age of Ultron. But even putting that aside, I adore TDK trilogy and it still ranks as my favorite superhero movies. The trilogy, obviously starting with Batman Begins, is what put introduced me to Nolan. I hadn’t seen Memento and Insomnia till then so Batman Begins was literally my first introduction to him.

I was always a big Batman fan as a huge follower of the DCAU cartoons with Kevin Conroy voicing a really badass Batman throughout the 90′s and into the early 2000′s. While I enjoyed the first 4 Batman movies as a kid, yes even B&R, I always wanted to see the more somber version from the cartoons. Batman Begins hit me at the perfect time where I started to have longer attention spans and wasn’t just looking for the next action scene. Rewatching the movie, it amazes me that Batman doesn’t show up for half the movie. I think that was a really brave call given pretty much all previous Batman movies introduced Batman almost immediately. I genuinely love all the prelude to Bruce becoming Batman. I liked that we got to see his training extensively and we are introduced to the city and see the dynamics of the rich and the poor, the police, the mob, the lawyers etc... It really gives Gotham a very grounded personality. I think Nolan really killed it at the casting level. By getting Caine as Alfred, Freeman as Fox, and Oldman as Gordon, he created a superbly acted support structure around Bruce/Batman, so we aren’t just always waiting for Bruce to show up. On top of that, they had Liam Neeson as Ra’s, who is effortlessly compelling, as well as other strong supporting actors like Cillian Murphy as a scene stealing Scarecrow, Tom Wilkinson as Falcone, Rutger Hauer as Earle etc... All giving personality to a difference facet of the city and Bruce’s life. But this truly is Bale’s movie. I didn’t know him at all prior to this film, but I have been a fan ever since. He carries the movie on his shoulders and he delivers the ferociousness of Batman and the humanity of Bruce Wayne effortlessly. If there is someone who doesn’t make a big impression, its Katie Holmes. I didn’t find her terrible, but rather the character isn’t exactly well written which bleeds into the next movie with Maggie Gyllenhall as well. My favorite Batman performance. Rewatching, what surprised me the most is the amount of humor in the movie. This is actually reflective of the entire trilogy. The movies deal with darkness and death, but there is actually plenty of humor sprinkled throughout these movies which prevent it from being dour. There have been a lot of superhero origin stories, but this still remains the gold standard of superhero origin stories. A 9/10 for me.

There is nothing I can say about The Dark Knight that hasn’t been said a 100 times over. It quite literally is the best comic book movie of all time. But it basically is at heart a drama about Gotham. Whereas BB acts as a character centric piece, this film is about all the characters living in Gotham. Arguable, the character that has the biggest arc in the film is Harvey Dent. Again, the casting department knocked it out of the park with the casting of Aaron Eckhart as Harvey Dent. Unfortunately, Eckhart never really capitalized on his performance here because he really was terrific in the film, both as Harvey and as Two-Face, to the point where you wished you had more of Two-Face. Gary Oldman gave his best work in the trilogy in this movie. The desperation as the situation spins out of control is fabulous. Freeman also has a very meaty role in the movie and continues to add a lot of weight to the scenes as well as plenty of humor, as does Michael Caine. Christian Bale continued to be terrific. There were some complaints about his voice, which I feel have been overexaggerated over the years. I definitely think his Begins voice is better, but barring one or two scenes, I never really had an issue with Bale’s voice in this film. He delivers a very nuanced performance. Maggie Gyllenhaal took over from Katie Holmes in TDK and while I think she is a far better actress than Katie Holmes, I think the character itself is not very well written. In both movies, Rachel comes off as very judgmental. Whereas in BB I can understand her reason in being so, given Bruce was ready to commit murder and later was out being a playboy in front of her for the sake of appearances, in this movie she is judgmental towards Bruce even though she knows what he has been doing to help the city. Also, she did come off a bit flaky in the whole Bruce/Rachel/Harvey triangle. And then there is Heath Ledger. There are very few performances that I consider perfect. This is one of them. I think every choice Ledger makes in this movie, be it intentional or unintentional, works amazingly well. Like him licking his lips to keep the make up on. It just adds a creepy quality to his character, even if it is completely unintentional. There are so many ticks and quirks in Ledger’s performance that make this a phenomenal performance. I don’t see any villain performance having matches that since 2008. I think the closest I have seen prior to that is Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lector in Silence of the Lambs. It really is a performance that adds such a big extra edge to the movie. I love that Nolan sticks to certain details such as Bruce never actually drinking alcohol and throwing it away at the part and then Joker showing up and taking a glass and him spilling almost all of it. It gives a lot of personality to the characters. If I have any complaint about the movie, it is that Bruce does at times feel like a stationary character as he does not have as big of an arc as a Harvey Dent. And if you want, you can pick apart the holes in the series of events that happen that cause the chaos. But the drama of the film is just so intense that you forget all of that behind. I give it a 9.5/10

The Dark Knight Rises to me is the film that gets often maligned just because it isn’t TDK. And that is a crazy yardstick to compare it to. But as a movie on its own, its pretty damn awesome. TDKR is where the film truly steps away from being a version of the comics to being an Elseworld story with Batman having been absent for 8 years and then Bruce retiring and leaving Gotham at the end of the movie. But I don’t think there was any way for Nolan to close out his trilogy without it becoming an Elseworld story and it really didn’t matter because I always figured that as long as Bruce is out there, if Gotham needed him, he would come back. Its not as if there aren’t existing comic book stories of Bruce having retired or left being Batman behind. Again, there is some superb new casting. JGL ends up being surprising integral and he is terrific. Tom Hardy is awesome as Bane. He manages to provide a terrifying presence. I actually loved his voice. I love that a terrifying brute of a man has a polite, gentlemanly sounding voice. It gave him a unique personality. Marion Cotillard is pretty good as Talia/Miranda. She has an awkwardly filmed death scene but she’s good throughout the rest of the film, particularly during the reveal scene. But the casting of the movie for me was Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle. I knew Anne Hathaway mostly from the Princess Bride movies till then even though she had gotten an academy award nomination by then. But I really didn’t envisage her as Selina Kyle but she blew me out of the water with her performance. She was seductive, yet very likable. I love the clever costume design of her goggles looking like cat ears when she puts them up. I also love Nolan’s version of the Lazarus Pit. Certainly Bruce’s climb out of the pit is one of the most compelling scenes of the movie. You truly feel the emotion. The film also has one of the best acted scenes I have scene between Michael Caine and Christian Bale in the hallway. Its the scene I remember first whenever I think about TDKR. Oscar quality acting by both in that scene. The returning cast is all terrific but Michael Caine has a few gut wrenching scenes, including this one and the scene at the funeral at the end. Oldman and Freeman continue to be stalwarts throughout the movie, I really admire that Nolan did not waste these actors and given them very substantial roles in all the movies and all these actors really respected the material to not sleep walk through the roles. I think Bale’s performance here rivals his performance in Begins. Particularly in the scenes in the Pit. You get to see a full range of emotions, from pain, to despair, to anger, to hope. Its a superb performance. The film isn’t flawless. Its just a tad too long and there is some clunky editing at times. None of the three films can be said to contain very memorable action sequences because Nolan is not known to have great action sequences in his film until more recently, but the drama in the action negates that. Like, the Bane vs Batman fight where Bane breaks Batman, isn’t the greatest action scene in terms of fight choreography, but there is a lot weight to these characters which is what makes it incredibly compelling. Same is true to an extent for the climax at the end. When Batman beats Bane, I felt a sense of satisfaction after what I had witnessed in the previous fight. Overall, I genuinely feel that I love the last act of TDKR the most out of all three films. The Batplane, Batpod, and Tumbler chase scene was thrilling and it was cool to watch all three Bat vehicles in operation. The ending montage also ends the movie on a real uplifting note for all characters, which is very satisfying. I really love the movie. A 9/10.

It has to be said that Zimmer’s score across all three films contributes enormously to these movies. All in all, these set of movies are still my favorite superhero movies and my favorite Nolan movies till date.

[alien-tech]

i rewatched frozen 2 the other day so it’s time to talk about just how badly anna is treated in the movies

before this i would like to clarify i'm not anti-elsa at all, but disney really did a number on anna

obvious frozen 1 and 2 spoilers ahead

first of all, let’s start with the fact that both movies are centered around elsa's growth. yes, anna is in the movies as well but ultimately when you consider the plotlines a lot of it place elsa at the center of attention. elsa ran away and is struggling so anna needs to go after her as well as fix the winter issue that elsa inadvertently started. elsa has a whole song about her struggle when essentially she ran up the north mountain (which was a whole lot easier for her than anna since she does have powers) and made a castle where she was living blissfully ignorant to what her kingdom was going through. disney tries so hard to pass this off as elsa’s struggle but considering that it takes anna most of the whole movie to even get up there in the first place, i’d say elsa overnight trip wasn’t really much of a struggle right?

and on that note, elsa and anna are supposed to be the main characters right? they're both supposed to be the main characters, but both movies feel so much more centered on elsa and elsa's arc. it's about elsa's struggle with her power, elsa's mission to the enchanted forest, elsa's the gift, elsa's the spirit, elsa’s etc etc. again, yes anna is there too but the way disney focuses on how elsa grows and glosses over anna's growth is very underwhelming and disappointing.

everything that happens in the movies is perpetrated by elsa. elsa starts the winter and then runs away and in the end it’s anna who fixes the problem. elsa triggers the spirits and wants to run away yet again, this time to the enchanted forest and in the end she goes too far and dies and it’s anna who again, fixes the problem; which she figures out how to do on her own without any powers. disney portrays anna as a side character, focusing on elsa's arc so much more instead of anna's.

this is kind of a different point but still relevant, here's this post about elsa's oufits in the second and first movies. anna has at most 6 outfits. elsa has at least 8. it’s obvious that disney intended to market elsa as a main character and put her before anna in every way possible, even putting less effort into giving anna varied clothing design. disney will try to pass off frozen as a movie about sisters but it doesn’t even do that well. elsa undermines anna at every possibility. she lies to anna about hearing the voice, she remains distant from her throughout movie two (even though her growth in movie one was supposed to be about opening up herself again and trusting in her powers), elsa blames anna for trying to save her from the fire, she continues to promise anna that they will do it together, and then essentially tells anna she's not powerful enough to come along with her ("no anna, i have my power to protect me. you don't" to which anna replies "excuse me i climbed the north mountain, survived a frozen heart, and saved you from my ex boyfriend without any powers"). elsa still pushes anna away in movie two, even though it was a lesson she supposedly learned in movie one. anna then says "you promised me we would do this together" and elsa says agree and then turns around and COMPLETELY BREAKS THAT PROMISE RIGHT IN FRONT OF OLAF AND IMMEDIATELY AFTER SAYING THAT TO HER SISTER.

without anna, elsa died and even though anna did die (because of elsa but that was largely an accident) and everyone is talking about how strong elsa is for surviving becoming frozen but that EXACT thing happened to anna and while that was happening she managed to survive it, save her kingdom, and save her sister AND she didn't have any powers! going by this point, anna is the stronger sister.

movie one is arguably, all about elsa which would be alright if they made movie two about anna. despite the fact that in movie one, anna climbed the north mountain, tried to save elsa in order to save her kingdom only to be shoved out again, shot in the heart with magic, froze to death, and still managed to save elsa from hans and play a part in stopping the winter; the movie still ends on the note that elsa has learned to control her powers. it's about elsa learning to stop fearing herself and elsa learning to let people in right? and yet, if that movie is about elsa and elsa’s growth (even though again, anna did everything) then movie two should definitely be centered about anna right? but it's not about her and if the growth for elsa in movie one was learning to trust in herself and her sister then why in movie two does elsa continually shut anna out? it's like she made no growth at all.

anna is such a strong character and it’s so disappointing how much disney glosses over her. when anna was FIFTEEN she lost her parents. she went to their funeral ALONE and then she stood outside her sister's room, BEGGING for her to come out and comfort her. she BEGGED elsa to come out, to be there so they could grieve together and elsa didn't. nevermind the fact that elsa “couldn’t”. that’s her SISTER. even if she couldn’t open the door to hug her, she could at least talk to her through the door. but she ignored her and essentially insinuated to anna once again that she hated her and that she wasn’t worth talking to. disney focuses so much on how hard it was for elsa when she was young but to say nothing of the hardships anna faced when they were younger. she lost her BEST FRIEND and older sister in one day and she blamed HERSELF. elsa never telling her why they weren’t allowed to play with together anymore. her parents never telling her why her sister suddenly didn't want to play with her anymore. nobody telling her why her sister suddenly didn't love her anymore. i get that you could argue that it would be dangerous for anna to know, but is the better option really not telling her anything and having anna blame herself?

i get elsa had a hard time with her powers and all, but anna had it so much worse. can you imagine the sort of things that would have gone through anna’s head after losing elsa? her sister is the eldest and maybe has royal lessons (because as you know eldestborn children receive ruling lessons but youngest children do not). maybe anna figured “i’m not important enough for her anymore”

and do you think anna had her parents? the only person anna could play with was elsa because their parents are the king and queen and have royal duties. most princes and princesses are raised by nannies and nursemaids. anna didn’t have her parents and elsa was GONE and she thought it was because of her. anna's parents were the king and queen, they were busy with their duties and the rest of their time was spent with elsa trying to help her control her powers. anna had no one. no one.

back to movie two though, elsa defied anna over and over again and anna still said "i believe in you elsa, more than anyone or anything" and as SOON AS ANNA SAID THAT elsa said they would do it together and then sent her away. on a fucking ice boat. and you know what happened then? ELSA DIED WITHOUT ANNA AND ANNA YET AGAIN THOUGHT IT WAS HER FAULT. after olaf said “i think she [elsa] went too far” anna’s face fucking FALLS because she thinks “if i was there for her..” nevermind the fact that anna WANTED to go with her and was turned down because elsa implied that anna wasn’t strong enough to go with her. 

as said by their grandfather "magic makes people feel too powerful, too entitled" now in the case of the northuldra, they weren’t entitled nor did the magic make them feel such. but with elsa? she definitely has an entitled attitude that is only exemplified as the movie goes on. the parents clearly favored elsa so much and i would say elsa's entitlement comes about 40% from her parents treatment

the movies focus so much on elsa and what elsa is doing, it's not fair to anna. nevermind that anna is literally the hero of the first movie AND of the second movie. elsa was dead and anna knew that, as well as the fact that anna just lost her childhood best friend and still she got up climbed out of that mountain, woke the giants, destroyed the bridge, and ALL OF THAT while ALONE AND AGAIN WITH NO POWERS but oh my god, elsa is the HERO because she stopped the flood. again, i would like to clarify i'm not anti-elsa i'm just anti-anna underappreciation.

that was most of it for my rant but @mamadragon404 brought up a good point when we were talking about this yesterday. does anyone bring into question the fact that anna is supposed to be queen with no training? any child born after the first are never trained to rule. only firstborns receive ruling lessons and secondborns are supposed to be married off for political gain. this actually explains so much about why anna tries to find a true love at the party, and attaches onto hans so quickly because at home in arendelle, she has no one. her parents are gone, elsa has continually shut her out again and again, and her whole duty as a princess is to marry off for a union. she thinks that's what she's supposed to do and it's the only thing she can do because she feels so alone at home there's nothing there for her in arendelle, so her best hope at happiness is to run off with a prince, hopefully the man of her dreams because with a duty like “marrying off” the best thing she can hope for is that she’s stuck with someone who loves her. she's so quick to trust hans because she has to convince herself it's what she wants, she has to because it's supposed to be her duty and at least it's not her parents choosing which country's prince she has to marry she's trying to choose for herself, because subconsciously she knows she doesn't actually really have a choice.

so yeah the movies should've been nicer to anna and i am sorry but they did not do justice to anna at all, she deserved so much fucking more appreciation than she was given.

[leverage-commentary]

Leverage Season 2, Episode 8, The Ice Man Job, Audio Commentary Transcript

Christine: Hello, I'm Christine Boylan, Writer on this episode.

Jeremiah: Jerimiah Chechik, I directed this.

John: John Rodgers, Executive Producer.

Chris: Chris Downey, Executive Producer, and this is The Ice Man Job.

John: The Ice Man Job was- where did The Ice Man Job come from, Boylan?

Christine: Like all great ideas, Albert brought this into the room obsessed with a certain heist. 

John: The Antwerp diamond heist.

Christine: The Antwerp diamond heist. And we just tore the article apart, and we all tried to figure out, you know, what was gonna happen, and what was gonna happen in our version of it.

John: See the thing is, when you write a con and heist show that goes past even 10 episodes, you are now one of the longest running con and heist shows on earth. So as soon as a new diamond heist article hit, we attacked it like piranhas. 

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Jeremiah, what was it like shooting Russians stealing stuff in the middle of Portland? Cause this is the middle of the freaking street, middle of the day.

Jeremiah: It was pretty easy.

John: Yeah?

[Laughter]

Jeremiah: I could really do this all day. I think the fun of it was the bridge.

John: Yeah?

Jeremiah: Which kind of kept a lid on the composition, and we found a wonderful driver who is in this scene.

John: Vince Valenzuela.

Jeremiah: And he is a stand up, as you've said.

John: He’s a stand up. I had totally forgotten, Vince and I had worked together for 15 years ago- 20 years ago doing stand up in Seattle.

Jeremiah: He lives in Portland, he came in, killed the audition, and in this particular scene, I just love that he just slipped into that Bostonian sensitiblity and just really sold it to me. I loved it, and-

John: We had a lot of good vics this year. We had a lot of good vics this year.

Christine: Yeah, we did.

John: And that was mostly the Portland talent base.

Chris: I would say, yeah, always.

Christine: Absolutely.

Chris: Now Jeremiah did you- was there any movies that you looked at or anything you wanted to get for the feel of this episode?

Jeremiah: No, I didn't want anything to influence me at work; I like to come clean.

[Laughter]

John: He's a tabula rasa, he just takes a ton of peyote and channels the muse.

Jeremiah: I meditate for a week before and then I just go and do it. Rarely do I even read the script.

John: I know that.

Christine: Oh, I know.

John: He just knows who’s in the scene. He has a rough idea how to shoot it.

Jeremiah: But in this case, I actually did, because the script was really very very fun. It was quite clever and anyone who has seen this episode knows. And if you haven't seen it, then you shouldn't be listening to me, you should be watching the episode.

John: Should go watch the episode.

Chris: You're already gonna be lost. 

John: No idea.

Christine: This is another one of those great episodes that every single one of us had a hand in. 

John: Yes. Everybody has something.

Christine: Everybody has something- some gem in here.

John: And that was a nice bit with the glass. This is the first episode Sophie's gone-

Jeremiah: This is Elijah’s? cup.

John: Yes this is Elijah's cup. I'm Irish, I kind of know what that is. This was the first episode where Sophie was gone. This was originally gonna be the winter season opener, with the idea that she'd been gone for awhile. And we were really faced with the idea- we wanted to keep Gina and Sophie as a character present, and so that's where the subplot to this came up, the idea that what happens when we’re a man down? Because this is something we faced in the writers room - what are we gonna do when we’re a man down?

Christine: Absolutely.

Chris: Well this one kind of is a piece with 3 Days of the Hunter Job where we have- since Sophie's gone, people have to shift into different roles and that's really- we couldn't really break this episode until we came up with that. What’s-

Jeremiah: Excuse me, can we talk about me now?

[Laughter]

John: Yes.

Chris: I threw it to it you about the influences. You didn’t want to-

John: You didn’t want to talk about it! Do I need to get you more scotch? Is that it?

Jeremiah: Yeah.

Christine: You were influenced by the drinks of the Thai restaurant.

[Laughter]

Jeremiah: I like the dynamic of Christian and Beth in this, being petulant children.

John: Yes.

Jeremiah: Always fun to do.

John: They really fell into a brother/sister vibe this year and it really paid off; it’s a lot of fun. And the gemological institute was nice enough to help us with this.

Christine: Those guys are fantastic. We had a great-

Jeremiah: Didn't we win some award from the gemological institute?

Christine: They were definitely pleased. We got their blessings and then some.

Jeremiah: Best presentation of jewels in a television drama.

John: There’s valuable lessons for those kids out there writing the spec scripts. People like to talk about their jobs.

Christine: Research.

John: Because really, this has got a lot of really fine detail in it and the- this is- Beth is about to introduce the plot point: diamonds are registered. And not even just big diamonds are registered. They have, essentially serial numbers, on them and you called the GIA and you found out the size. They sent us a lot of information, exactly how it's done, how it’s inscribed. 

Christine: Answered every question we had - really were terrific.

Chris: We’ve got beer koozies from the GIA now, we’ve got letterman jackets.

Jeremiah: You know my aren’t, but I just implied blood diamonds.

John: You just implied- really.

Jeremiah: I really gotta trade up.

Christine: This is- a lot of the registration is to combat the whole blood diamond issue.

John: Yeah. And that was-when we were writing this, for a while the first act was all about getting the certificates, and then it was just easier- and it was interesting because Chris was actually out of town. He came back, we were explaining the episode with all the certificates and stuff and then I said - it’s like filing the vin number off your car. And you were, ‘that’s it! I get that! That's-’ I was like, ‘Oh, alright.

Jeremiah: But I bet you didn't know years and years ago I did a big commercial for De Beers where they flew me to London and I walked through those vaults. 

John: Really?

Christine: Wow.

Jeremiah: Where I realized diamonds don't have any real intrinsic value at all.

John: No they do not, sir.

Jeremiah: There are more diamonds than anything. More diamonds than atoms.

[Laughter]

John: It's a manipulation of perceived value. No, it’s very-

Jeremiah: Well sold.

John: Yeah, exactly. Now this is interesting. ‘Yes! I get to be the con man’. What- how did we wind up with assigning these roles? I’m trying to remember the logic we fell on? I think we wanted to sort of pay off Aldis- Hardison always tends to go too far.

Christine: Right and also Parker playing the inside here, she knows so much more about the product than anyone else.

Chris: It was also a product of - we wanted to figure out why we would get our team of thieves breaking into a vault.

John: Yes.

Chris: That was really the thing that stymied the episode was, we had a great idea behind this which was this diamond heist, but why would our team of robin hood thieves do that? And ultimately what we figured out was if one of them was being forced to do it, and they would have to break in ahead-

John: Then we were like alright, is Maggie being held hostage? And the thing is- I personally, and this is a really irrational thing, I hate hostage episodes. I despise them. They're a cheap manipulative trick. And so really trying to find the most interesting way to do, which was Aldis being grabbed in the middle of the episode because he had gone over; that at least felt motivated.

Christine: But being grabbed and used, he wasn't just like held in a room.

John: Exactly.

Chris: I don’t know if-

Jeremiah: So Die Hard is that one of the movies-?

[Laughter]

Chris: Apparently he doesn’t.

John: No, now you know why? Because she's actually got an agenda in that movie.

Jeremiah: They're hostages!

John: They're hostages, but you know what? I think in TV- in a movie it's viable, in a TV it’s not because, you know-

Chris: You're saying you think it’s schmuck bait.

John: Exactly its schmuck bait. In American TV you're not gonna kill off-

Chris: We can’t keep arguing about this during this shot.

Jeremiah: I really loved shooting this.

Chris: This is a really incredible shot.

Jeremiah: Yes I-

John: It's not bad.

[Laughter]

Chris: Talk to us about this shot.

Jeremiah: I planned this shot. I planned this shot. And how I planned it was I was gonna shoot her in slow motion. This is another shot that was very complicated. I'm always very competitive with Dean Devlin, when he directs, about how many of these moves I can do in a piece. I felt I was reasonably successful here.

Chris: Boy is she just stunning here.

Christine: Gary Camp, our operator, doing heros work again, right here.

John: Just the sort of mantra ‘shut up, trust.’ What's interesting-

Christine: ‘Trust the diamond.’

John: This mantra she's saying is actually the opposite of how Hardison plays this con. We’re actually laying in for the audience here how and why Hardison's gonna wind up screwing up. It's also- now this actor is-

Christine: Sal Xuereb. Fantastic.

John: Great job. I like that he looks at the diamond first, you know.

Jeremiah: And you can't help but look at that diamond.

Chris: Yeah, no it- yeah.

[Laughter]

John: Everyone’s a little hypnotized by Beth Riesgraf. 

Chris: I’m a little hypnotized by her right now.

John: Well, you know, because she tomboys every episode. Every episode she's in the Nikes.

Jeremiah: That’s why it's nice to dress her up, and she felt great doing this, and she had a great time doing this. And what I liked about it, I got to walk to the set; that was one of my memorable moments here. I was close to the hotel. That's everything.

John: That is everything. That's how you decide how to take gigs, is whether you can walk to set or not.

Christine: That was a nice morning.

John: And Portland giving us great locations.That bridge, the street- shooting that scene in LA, we would’ve snapped our own necks.

Jeremiah: We’d still be shooting.

John: We'd still be shooting. Portland, yet again, coming through.

Jeremiah: This is good. I like the french reverses that I do here. It’s a style-

John: What is a french reverse my friend?

Jeremiah: It's not a direct over, it’s an indirect over, a left side over.

John: I trust that. and this is-

Jeremiah: This is where we feel his Cockney accent, which he worked so well, and I had to really back him out so we could understand him.

Christine: He was too good.

John: Who was our vocal coach up there?

Chris: It was- what, Mary- Mary Mack is her name.

John: Yeah, Mary Mack.

Christine: Mary McDonald.

Jeremiah: Insert edit here.

John: Mary McDonald and she worked with us for the accents all the way through Gina, Aldis, everything; it was a lot of fun.

Jeremiah: Pasha Lychnikoff playing a Russian, which was not a stretch.

John: Not a big stretch.

Christine: Nice and easy for him.

Chris: The accent you had to write this [sounds like: petoir], what did you do?

Christine: My favorite thing beside speeches is writing in accents.

Chris: Now how did you do that? Cause they were hilarious.

John: Now hold on, I'm going to get Jerimiah scotch cause he's out of Guinness.

Christine: Oh here we go, we’re pouring scotch.

John: Don't get that on the soundboard.

Jeremiah: Fight, fight.

Christine: I did it with pleasure. 

Chris: Where did you find it?

Christine: You know, there is a lot of things I find difficult like plot and story, but things I find fairly easy-

Chris: But I mean, did you go on the web, were you going and looking at clips?

Christine: I've been an anglophile since I was a kid.

Chris: So this is all-

Jeremiah: Character and story are your weakest points-

Christine: Are my weakest points, you know that.

Chris: So all the-

John: Why am I bringing you back next year?

Christine: I don't know, are you? I don’t know what’s happening.

Jeremiah: You didn't say that about me, though.

Chris: So all the jargon and stuff you knew.

Christine: Yeah, this was a lot of watching a lot of Guy Ritchie movies, watching a lot of- just the usual sort of British television that I enjoy and a lot of the Brit movies that I like.

Jeremiah: This was reasonably complicated to stage, because there are so many people in this scene and-

John: Yeah, you're shooting 6 people in there.

Jeremiah: Yeah, identifying the coverage, exactly what beats to shoot, was a bit of a trick in that it’s a pretty dark place, and I had to use their, kind of, blocking to move them in and out of the light.

Chris: And to orient the geography so the audience knows where everybody is.

Jeremiah: Yeah. Especially me.

John: I like that nice little, subtle beat she does as he lists her crimes.

Christine: And that she gets more and more-

John: More and more frustrated and he can tell that she's pissed off. 

Christine: Oh, she’s brilliant.

John: Where did the mute Eliot bit come from? Was that was Dirty Rotten Scoundrels? I think that was the-

Christine: I don't know, I thought that was just shutting him up. It could've been Dirty Rotten Scoundrels unconscious reference there.

Chris: I think it was general- we wanted him to get under their skin.

John: Yeah.

Christine: Hubris.

John: The whole premise of this episode was, what is the most asshole-ish stuff that Aldis can do? You can swear on these, by the way, the most asshole-ish stuff that Aldis- that Hardison could do.

Jeremiah: Can you say fuck on theses things?

John: Sure. Just don't do it unnecessarily, like in a fake prerogative it's alright.

[Laughter]

Christine: Fucking what?

John: That's good. Oh hey mom, I hope you’re enjoying the commentary.

Christine: My moms heard that.

John: And this is, sort of, the hook and the push. This is- he's- the trick to, and Apollo is very clear about this, the trick to a lot of these cons, is convincing the guy he doesn't want it the first time around.

Christine: You have to refuse.

John: You have to refuse, exactly. And you know, then put pressure on the guy that he winds up coming back to you, so it's his idea when it actually hooks.

Jeremiah: Pasha, knowing better, takes a little bit of the bait for later.

John: And this is great. We actually managed to hit this pretty well, she's gonna- Parker’s got a habit of picking locks when she's annoyed or nervous.

Chris: Yes.

Christine: That's the first part of this.

Jeremiah: This is a very cute little high school bit of business between the boys and- 

John: Nice rack focus there; bouncing back and forth.

Christine: This is Nate doing exactly what John Rogers does in the room.

John: What's that?

Christine: When you walk in, and you've stood outside so you've heard what we’re talking about. 

John: I don't stand outside, you’re just very loud and I hear what you're saying.

Christine: And then you just walk in, and start in on the conversation, ‘Huh, what?’

John: Do I have the same magnificent presence as Tim Hutton when I do it?

Christine: I would like to- well, no.  Sadly, no.

[Laughter]

Chris: Gives the scene a little energy to have somebody enter.

Christine: Absolutely, it’s great.

Jeremiah: ‘Not. Gonna. Help.’

[Laughter]

Jeremiah: And I remember being very specific about this.

Christine: I love this shot.

Jeremiah: With this piece of direction, period, full stop, each word-

John: Each word, land it.

Jeremiah: Take a beat. I think Christian said, ‘No, I'm just gonna say not gonna help.’ ‘No.’

Chris: Now shooting- talk about- talk about shooting through this.

Jeremiah: I shot this in a reflection; this is all reflected.

Christine: In the jewelry store.

Chris: How is that difficult?

Jeremiah: Because it’s a semi-silvered mirror and I put it off-axis and avoided seeing myself. 

John: Nicely done. 

Chris: That’s great.

John: And that's planting the fact that this is a security guard who shows up later.

Jeremiah: And it's a jewelry store, and all in one iconic image.

John: Yeah, it all moves along very quickly. I don't know why Tim chose to do this as- cause he's playing Sterling in this. And he's chosen Sterling, and he's not really doing Mark Sheppard, I think, just more sort of doing the impression of Mark Sheppard that- the impression of Sterling that Nate would do at like the Christmas party at IYS to piss him off.

Christine: Absolutely.

Jeremiah: In fact, I had that exact conversation.

John: Yes, I'd like to know the motivation.

Jeremiah: Because I said, ‘Are you playing Mark? Or are you playing a fictitious character that you are inventing?’ ‘The latter.’

John: Oh.

Jeremiah:  And he was very consciously making that decision. He was not gonna play Mark. He was gonna invent a character that he felt was more appropriate to deliver the kind of bait. 

John: Yeah, and this is kind of a fun-

Jeremiah: I think it was right, by the way.

John: Yeah, it was right. It's also a fun recurring bit with Nate Ford's character development this year - he’s a jerk. Nate Ford enjoys screwing with people. Now that he's sober, he's an unpleasant human being and he really does- like in the episode right after this, Papadakolis, Tim loves playing Nate when Nate is playing just that really manipulative jerk.

Jeremiah: And the question is: is Mark’s character becoming more likable?

John: Yeah, possibly.

Jeremiah: And there you go.

John: And there you go. And this was interesting, because we wanted to make everybody check in with Sophie, and- but Eliot would never ask for help.

Christine: He's the only one not asking for help.

John: And that was a big deal, was the fact that instead he's just like, ‘I'm going to kill these people. Please come back.’

Christine: Yeah, he doesn't want to change roles.

John: No, he's happy!

Christine: He wants to do his job.

John: ‘My job was to get punched and kicked.That's my job,’ as he says in 206. This was a lot of fun, clearing people out. 

Christine: That’s hilarious.

John: This is actually based on that story when I worked on that gas pipeline. Remember in that high school? I worked on a gas pipeline in my 20s when I quit university for a while, and we were looking- investigating a gas leak, came around the corner and found high school students smoking. Because it was out of line of sight of the principal office. In the middle of a gas leak. So we basically did this, we just like wearing these masks were in full respirators and were like, ‘Get the fuck out, you’re gonna kill us all!’

Jeremiah: I thought the art department really overdid it on that piece of cotton.

Chris: It's a little bit over the top, but you know, it works.

John: A little bit.

Jeremiah: But again, as we say, we’re on the fun train here. 

John: We’re on the fun train.

Jeremiah: Whatever it takes.

Chris: And did Marc Roskin do this?

Jeremiah: Yeah, he shot- we were so pressed for time, this scene was done while I was shooting the-

John: The vault? Or the van?

Jeremiah: No, the robbery.

John: There you go. It's always fun- by the way, if you're writing your con or heist show, dropping the jumpsuit to reveal the sexy outfits-

Jeremiah: Always a good-

Christine: Never hurts.

John: Have that tool, have that screwdriver in your toolbox.

Jeremiah: It's always good, even in a hostage show. You can use it.

Chris: What was this place?

Jeremiah: It improves it.

John: ‘Oh no, he might die.’ He's not gonna die!

[Laughter]

Christine: This is a lab facility.

Chris: It is a lab, OK.

Jeremiah: It’s a real facility, they actually etch information on acorns. 

[Laughter]

John: Really? 

Jeremiah: Yeah.

John: Is that big?

Jeremiah: It’s huge. It will be!

John: It will be, there you go. It's a big industry.

Jeremiah: Advertising on grains of rice.

John: Wow, there you go.

Christine: We just gotta give Nadine a nod for the costumes in here, they were really brilliant. 

John: Yes, they’re very nice.

Christine: Everybody's outfits were terrific.

John: Why did we name the laser? I can't remember that.

Christine: Glinda. I don't know.

John: I don't remember who came up with it. 

Christine: I can’t remember who came up with that.

John: Cause it feels like an improv; I don’t remember that in the script.

Christine: I feel like that was you. Because most of the other Cockney stuff I wrote, but Glinda did not come from me.

John: I think it was an improv.

Christine: Could be Aldis. He’s hilarious, by the way.

John: Cause remember I was working on the next, the 209- 210 with you when you guys, so I really just bombed in for the heist, for a bunch of the det cord stuff, and solving a lot of the heist problems. I like heist problems. Now how difficult was this?

Jeremiah: This was not difficult in that it just took a while of second-unit- you know, we were shooting inserts, and that machine was, it actually- I know I'm giving too much away, it actually did not laser diamonds.

John: What? They don't use the same laser on acorns they use on diamonds?

[Laughter]

Christine: You're kidding me - that's a laser, look at that!

John: That’s madness! That clearly looks like a laser.

Jeremiah: I'm wrong! I'm wrong! I'm watching TV, and I stand corrected.

John: By the way, that's a great visual effect. That looked really nice, with a little bit of mist off it. 

Chris: That looked really great.

John: Beautiful lift, nice pass.

Jeremiah: The handoff.

Christine: These two could live a life of crime. 

John: They could, they could. Very nice hands. And now the sale.

Jeremiah: Beth does the, kind of, blank look very well.

John: Yes, she does.

Chris: This is a great shot, too. That's a beautiful shot.

John: You like an inside shot, whenever you're shooting a piece of machinery like that.

Chris: Microwave oven from inside, I love it.

John: Fridge- like a good inside the fridge shot.

Chris: Like a good fridge shot.

Jeremiah: What about shoes?

Chris: I have not done shoes.

John: Why would you shoot shoes? That’s madness, just a foot coming at you. Here. 

[Glass Clinks]

John: You’re 21 years old, you could have sex with this scotch in every state in the union.

Christine: It’s legal. By the way, I did wait until we were on set to have- to tell Aldis, ‘When you're walking, can you just say, “The Ice Man cometh”? And he did and I was the happiest girl in the world.

[Laughter]

Jeremiah: He didn't know what it meant, though.

Christine: He’s young. 

John: That is a very 70’s look, that is really Chris rocking the Life On Mars look there.

Christine: Seriously, right?

Chris: The mod squad right there.

John: There's the mod squad! Right there! 

Christine: The mod squad shot.

John: Why aren't they running down a storm drain?

Chris: That's a beautiful car, too.

Christine: Wow.

John: I think you can actually see, though, people watching the shooting in the top floor. I think we kind of missed them that day.

Christine: Didn't Aldis learn how to drive that car in like 5 minutes? It's a stick, right?

John: Well if you remember correctly, if you watch the first season DVD, The Bank Shot Job was the first episode we shot, and he didn't know how to drive a stick and the van was a stick. So the first time the van starts to peel out it [coughs] just rolls away. But it-

Jeremiah: I like not seeing it, and then the car is there.

John: There's a nice locked off comedy frame right there.

Jeremiah: I like that.

John: You’ve could’ve made that- we've done some abductions and really, unless there's a fight or something, you wanna, you know- 

Jeremiah: I actually really enjoyed shooting this scene, which was in the most grotesque environment ever, but- 

Christine: We were close to death.

John: Really? What was wrong with it?

Jeremiah: It was the basement of a pulp and paper mill and-

John: Oh boy. There were union organizers buried in the floor, you know that. There's some rabble rousing communists from the 30’s in the cement.

Jeremiah: And Pasha is always good. He's- first of all he's a lovely person, but- he may have changed by the time this DVD is released, but when-

John: I don’t think things have gone horribly wrong.

Jeremiah: But this is a- I love this shot.

John: This, by the way, is kind of an homage to a running joke we have in the show, which is- this is in theory downstairs or back- the back rooms of the night club they were in, right?

Christine: The Russian club.

John: And there was a- there is a trope in espionage and spy movies of that moment and Chris and I used to do this sound effect, which is you know the deal that's going on in the back of the Russian bar. Which is, you know, just the sound in the background of, you know [imitating bass-heavy club music] ‘uhn ch uhn ch uhn ch’ and then the guy opens the door [louder] ‘uhn ch uhn ch uhn ch’ and then the door closes again, [quieter] ‘uhn ch uhn ch’ I don’t have the plutonium ‘uhn ch’.

Jeremiah: I love that; that’s well performed.

Chris: See almost every episode of Alias.

John: Almost every episode of Alias there's the uhn-ch uhn-ch in the background. 

Christine: She walks through the club - she walks all the way.

Chis: She walks through the club with the ‘uhn ch uhn ch’.

Jeremiah: You have to walk through the club to designate that you are a hip show.

Christine: That’s right, that’s why we walk through the club.

Jeremiah: You know what I mean, if you just cut to the back-

Chris: I'm gonna say, 25th Hour is another movie, there's an ‘uhn ch uhn ch’.

Jeremiah: Oh forever.

John: That's a good blog post is: the top ten ‘uhn ch uhn ch’ scenes.

[Laughter]

Chris: Top 10 uhn ch uhn ch scenes.

Christine: You have to write that.

Jeremiah: Aldis’ phone call here is kind of fun, it's very nice.

John: It’s a ton of fun.

Christine: ‘What accent is that?’

Jeremiah: This is England, this is how I see England.

John: It's rainy and there's cabs.

Jeremiah: And, you know, we actually got caviar for him and I wanted it so bad.

Christine: He loves it, he loves caviar. We had a nice chat about it.

John: I love that Sophie basically, ‘As long as you're not in the current parenthesis (situation you're in) you're fine. I can absolutely get you out of there.’

Christine: I’m a fan of that construction whenever we can use it.

Jeremiah: ‘As long as it's nothing to do with Russians.’

John: Exactly. And this is the fact that she's- again, we talked about this on the other commentaries, every now and then this turns into the detective show where you showcase people that are criminals that in theory- part of their skills is they can put together information very quickly, and Sophie pretty much knows exactly what’s going on the second-

Jeremiah: Even before it happens.

John: Really as soon as Hardison calls.

Christine: The tone of his voice and his failed accent, she can discern the entire thing.

John: Yeah, exactly. And there's a gun on the table. This is the bad day.

Christine: Not his best day.

John: And now the call for help and to take-

Jeremiah: I'm happy with the staging and cinema of this scene.

John: It’s beautiful. Is this also in the pulp and paper mill?

Christine: Yes it is. Oh, breathing that in was wonderful.

Jeremiah: It was a delight.

Chris: Oh wow, look at that. Couldn't ask for more smoke, could you? I mean...

Christine: I had a little mask and one of the crew members said, ‘Don’t use that.’

Jeremiah: It’s funny you said that, I did ask for more smoke.

John: And now this is the-

Chris: The beautiful thing here, is the camera constantly moving swooping around- 

Jeremiah: Well I always felt that that is one of the, kind of, operative iconic themes, visually, of the show, and really trying to keep it moving all the time. But not to upstage the actors, I’m always careful never to say, ‘Hey, camera, where are you going with that scene?’ I really do try to- sometimes I fail, but often I succeed.

Christine: It supports them, the way you reveal Parker in that last bit, it really-

John: That's another thing we did this year a lot, which is we never see Parker come in or out of a room.

Christine: She just appears.

John: She's just always there somehow.

Christine: Like a genie.

John: And the- this is competence porn. This is them basically brainstorming- this was the fun of the episode. We had to come up with a heist that wouldn't work, then come up with a heist that did work, but the key to that heist was somehow making the heist that wouldn't work, work.

Chris: Making the failing element of the other heist the key to success.

John: A lot of index cards on the wall that day.

Christine: So many.

John: A lot of stuff.

Jeremiah: This is more than my favorite moments, visually anyway.

John: Yeah, it's really nice; it’s very creepy, you know.

Christine: It really is.

Jeremiah: It’s very-

John: We don't usually see guns on our guys, is the thing.

Christine: Nope.

Jeremiah: Well I wasn't looking at the gun, I was looking at the elegance of the rotation.

John: Well I'm saying the elegance of the rotation, the beautiful light around a very dark moment-

Chris: And the light and the dark on his face.

Jeremiah: It was poetically dangerous.

John: Exactly. It really- it brought home the- 

Jeremiah: Entertainment value.

John: I was gonna say menace.

Jeremiah: That too.

John: The vertigo.

Jeremiah: Always love those shots.

John: And another recurring thing, when Hardison’s gone, no one knows how to use the computer.

Chris: Yeah.

Christine: Can’t even check email.

Jeremiah: Which is why I put them on the little computer because I thought it was more manageable than the big computer.

John: Yeah, it is absolutely a great choice. Also that space over the course of the season became the family space.

Jeremiah: I like that space.

Christine: Yes. That's not the computer space, that's the brother/sister-

John: That's the family- family arguments happen around that counter.

Chris: Well you've already- by this point in the episode, you've already been at the briefing so you kinda want to be at another part of the set.

John: It's also great that-

Jeremiah: Guess what kind of store this is?

[Laughter]

Chris: Pork store?

John: Pan up from jewelry to pork?

Jeremiah: Butcher?

Christine: Butcher?

Jeremiah: Cheese shop? No, it’s a diamond shop.

John: I love the fact that Parker gives Nate the hair spray with the implicit understanding that Nate will know what to do with that. And this is part of the fun and this was-

Jeremiah: Also, I love the way she does it without looking at him.

John: Yeah, she knows he’ll take it. What's a lot of fun here, is the- is Nate kind of playing a corrupt version of himself, and really getting to do the- you want more scotch? Alright there you go, alright hold on. [Moves away from mic.]

Jeremiah: Yeah.

John: Really getting to make fun of the guy he used to be, and that's one of the themes of the season, which is Nate Ford's identity-

Christine: And using Sterling, too, to distance himself.

Jeremiah: Notice the receding vocal quality of John's voice.

Chris: Scotch in the back of-

John: Getting more scotch.

Christine: Uhn ch uhn ch.

Jeremiah: Uhn ch uhn ch.

[Laughter]

John: Careful, there you go.

Christine: So he's playing the corrupt version of Nate, and using Jim Sterling's name to distance himself from it.

Jeremiah: This is a vault, this is a very very important kind of- this is the vault, this is how hard it is-

John: You're setting the specs.

Chris: Did we build this? What is this?

Christine: No, this is a vault.

Chris: This is a vault.

Jeremiah: Real vault.

John: That door- getting to her to swing on that door, you're not just gonna build one of those.

Christine: It was fun to be in the vault.

John: And this is, again, the fun of the construction, which is we now must make seem utterly impossible and then solve it.

Jeremiah: Those two shots where they were almost looking at the camera.

John: Yeah. That's- we don't usually do that. Why that choice?

Jeremiah: It was a conceit.

John: A conceited choice or just a conceit?

[Laughter]

Jeremiah: Both. It was hard to do both at the same time, that was one example.

John: This is, by the way, I like to say this is kind of elegant, because a lot of shorthand in both  movies and television would just have them take you through the schematics on the computer, or show a film or something like that. Having a guy do the tour with a goal, with a character is-

Jeremiah: I think it's very important to do that since we revisit later in a whole different way. 

John: Exactly.

Chris: Right.

Christine: Yup.

Jeremiah: And, you know, I particularly like the way we, kind of, solve the vault problem visually, too. I mean it feels real, it feels solid.

John: And all the security in here is real, I mean, including the fogger, which you were obsessed with. You love the fogger.

Chris: I love the fogger.

John: Calling the security expert you were checking up on.

Chris: This was pre-production, it was ‘Let's just see what's out there in terms of vault security.’ And the guy told me, ‘Oh, you know about the fogger, don't you?’

John: ‘No, tell me more.’

Chris: And I think I said the link with the description of the fog, I think ended up verbatim in the script. What the fog’s made out of.

Christine: Absolutely.

Chris: I think when we were doing pre-production, I made a point to say to Jeremiah, ‘It’s not Batman fog, it's gotta be like thick fog.’

Jeremiah: I mean, if it wasn't fog, it'd be foam.

[Laughter]

John: Foam? Oh. I wish we’d filled the place with foam, my god that'd be great.

Jeremiah: They do on [unintelligible]. They have rooms that, if you breach, it fills with foam in less than 2 seconds.

John: What does the foam do?

Jeremiah: Suffocates you.

Christine: Really?

Chris: Wow.

John: That's cool.

Jeremiah: Not if you're a terrorist.

John: Oh, there you go.

Jeremiah: Or somebody who accidentally enters the wrong office.

John: Yeah I know, Jesus.

Chris: Wow, we got to work that-

John: I don't want that.

Chris: Foam next year? Can we do foam?

John: That’s awful. Sometimes I’ll walk in offices accidentally, that seems harsh.

Jeremiah: There you go, suffocating foam.

John: There you go. And-

Jeremiah: Again, the computer is not exactly working perfectly.

Christine: Nothing works here.

John: Again, the challenge this year- first year we established the team was so good, a lot of the challenge this year was constraints. How do we put them off their game? How do we take one element away from them? And you know Sophie gave us the natural one in this one, everyone off their game, everyone’s in a different role and what was the fun here is, Parker kind of diving back into full thief mode for the first time this season, you know.

Jeremiah: Yeah. Close-ups of these guys. Close-ups I like, they feel right. I like that. One-eyed close-ups.

John: One-eye close-up is that a style? Do you have a name for that, too? The one-eyed close up?

Jeremiah: The one-eyed close-up. 

John: That's not bad, I would call it the Chechik.

Christine: The Chechik.

Chris: He sent her out with that $400,000 necklace on, very trusting.

Christine: Oh yeah.

John: He has her phone number, he knows where she works.

Christine: He did- we gave him the line, ‘You'll earn it later.’ Which was the filthiest thing I think I've ever seen.

[Laughter]

John: You know what? No, it's a bonus; she works there.

Christine: Oh that’s right she’s a counter girl, she’s a model.

John: She’s an employee. So what he's talking about is her pension.

Chris: Oh right.

Christine: Right. See? He still gives employees pensions.

John: There you go, and a little apology.

Christine: Innocent guy, he feels kinda bad about it.

John: We tried to make a deal out of the fact that Eliot doesn’t like doing this.

Jeremiah: Oh I like this.

Christine: Oh yeah.

Jeremiah: This is real, she’s up there. 

Christine: She's really up there.

Chris: That's a great shot.

Jeremiah: That’s a nice smile from her.

Christine: A lot of people in Portland loved watching this shot.

Chris: Oh what a beautiful shot.

Jeremiah: Yeah, and others didn't.

John: And in the season finale, when you eventually see it that's her on the roof of the City Hall- of the Portland City Hall, a ridiculous height-

Jeremiah: I think you tweeted that.

John: I took a couple pictures of that because I was stunned. There was a moment where I was like, are we out of our minds? Beth Riesgraf on a rig hanging like 6- 8 stories up.

Jeremiah: Tim is particularly funny in this scene. I find him engaging, funny. 

John: Whenever he's being corrupt, there's kind of a kernel of truth and funny to it.

Christine: Nate enjoys putting the screws to people.

John: Nate Ford is not the honest man he thought he was. And that's something we had a lot of fun playing with this year. Also the blocking, because this is crucial, because he's playing a role here. Did you- now did you come in and it was set up this way? And then you block or did you-?

Jeremiah: No, I set it up in order to block it a certain way, thereby making my life easier. In other words, I actually thought about it.

John: Oh, that's very nicely done.

Christine: Pre-production meetings were great.

John: The magnetic plates- the trick with the magnetic plates is from the Antwerp diamond heist, that I wound up demonstrating on the writers room doors with two pieces of cardboard and tape. 

Christine: Two pieces of cardboard and tape. Yes.

Jeremiah: As one does.

John: As one does, cause people kept reading it and going ‘I don't get how this works.’ And I actually wound up building it.

Jeremiah: Now this is a door- this- I love all of this stuff.

Chris: The cutting here is great, too, all the little bits.

John: Great heist cutting. Yeah this was- it was, again -

Jeremiah: It's gotta be a black van; they would never come in a white van.

Christine: Never.

John: You wouldn't be any self respecting Russian hitter in a white van, you know.

Jeremiah: It wouldn't happen.

John: ‘Oh look at that - there's a scuff on the side.’

Christine: ‘Can I take this one?’

John: But again, you know, people think when you write television shows, you've got this enormous plan and everything. You learn how to write every tv show while you're doing it. And again, part of the struggle this year-

Jeremiah: That was a good punch.

Chris: That was great.

John: That was a great punch. Is realizing we can just watch these people do stuff for an act. You know, you don't have to-

Chris: These guys are so funny. The line here-

John: ‘I'd like to see you do an accent.’

Chris: ‘I’d like to see you do an accent.’ Made me laugh.

Christine: We had many many different ad libs at the end there. The two of them were unstoppable, it was great.

Jeremiah: It was extremely fun to do all of this. This keeps going. Now we're approaching one of the absolute super fun shots.

Chris: Now let me ask you, when you're looking at a script like this and you know there are certain places you're gonna have to make compromises in the budget and what not, I'm imagining this sequence you're like digging in on, the break in sequence.

Jeremiah: Yeah, I mean, I try to dig in on everything.

Chris: But I mean, if you’re looking at one part of the show. 

Jeremiah: I actually- I know where the, kind of, emotional roots are. I have to determine where that is on the show. Like, what is the real emotional tracking relationship-wise? And I have to know where everything comes together. Once I make that determination, that's where I- kind of spend my time and really focus, and to the extent that I'm right, it's a good episode.

[Laughter]

John: Those- that is a great outfit on Hardison in that and so, sort of big props to Nadine for that hilarious looking piece of work. What was I gonna say? The- yeah this shot this is an iconic shot for the show.

Jeremiah: This is one of my favorite shots and this happened almost by accident; I'll explain. When we visited the vault and we were scouting- and it wasn't written like this, the problem was that there was no way for her to be on the door. And I just thought, the only way for her to get on the door, or to get in and not trip the wires, is those kind of window cleaner suction cups so I just ordered them up and then positioned her body in such a way that made such a great shot. Because we had a glass door with that iconic- I can watch that shot over and over again, even though I did it.

John: This entire act is like - I will watch Beth Reisgraf as Parker break into a vault for 15 minutes; I'm totally cool with that.

Chris: Yes, absolutely.

John: By the way, that character uses those suction cups in other episodes. And she actually uses them-

Jeremiah: Oh good, I'm glad we didn't buy them just for-

Chris: No no no.

John: She actually used them in the first season, too, and we used them and then we forgot about them.

Chris: On an armored car.

John: On an armored car. Yeah. This is a lot of fun, him hamming it up, trying to-

Jeremiah: This is the fake break in, this is very good. I mean he’s holding it up.

John: Nice little comedy beat. 

[Silence]

John: Sorry, scotch is kicking in.

[Laughter]

Christine: Cross-cutting conversations.

John: ‘I'm gonna kill you-’ it's nice. It's the little-

Jeremiah: And then silence befell the entire- as we kind of were.

Christine: But how much fun is it to write the conversations where they’re all on-?

Jeremiah: I love this shot.

Christine: Everyone’s doing different things.

John: Yes, exactly.

Chris: It’s a beautiful shot.

Jeremiah: Love the upside down of it.

Christine: I love this. I love the security cam just capturing everything that's going on, it's great.

John: Yeah it's great work, Derek, our computer graphics guy-

Jeremiah: I know we liked it. I hope everyone watching it liked it.

Chris: Here we really- we have every single character engaged in this, in the plot here. 

John: That's the challenge-

Jeremiah: The cutting rhythm is what really translates that.

John: Yeah, that’s really nice. That's the challenge of the show is, there's a lot of shows where there's one star and a bunch of sidekicks. We’re a real five-hander; everyone has to be doing something at every moment of the script.

Jeremiah: It's very challenging when you're cutting, you always have to be aware of it. And when you're shooting you have to be aware that that's what is gonna fit. Again, lovely.

John: That’s also a great shot.

Jeremiah: Classic.

John: Classic heist shot. The little smile she's got when she stands up, that’s what makes her happy.

Christine: Kid in a candy store.

Chris: And no laser grid.

Jeremiah: She likes that. I like doing that with-

Chris: As much as you hate hostage stories, I hate the laser grid.

Christine: I'm with Chris. I'm so with Chris on this one.

John: You hate the laser grid.

Chris: I never wanna see a laser grid on this again.

Christine: I was so happy.

John: I think we'll never top the laser grid we did in 207 - the moving laser grid - and that was pretty great. Even the reflection in her eyes-

Chris: That’s it.

John: That's it, you're done, you're out, cause that was it. We can’t do another one.

Jeremiah: Excuse me, can we talk about me again?

[Laughter]

John: Jeremiah, tell us the challenge of this opening the door with people walking in scene?

Christine: That door is beautiful.

John: That's tough. That's like-

Jeremiah: Those doors you can open with a finger.

John: Yeah exactly, but you gotta act like ‘ugh’. Give them the impression of weight.

Jeremiah: Here it is again.

John: An act reset. We don’t usually do an act reset.

Chris: We do sometimes.

John: Yeah, but it is not a big deal. This is tricky. This is a timing one- this is a timing joke.

Christine: This is all about to- 

Jeremiah: This was challenging to stage.

John: Really, how so?

Jeremiah: Timing-wise, this particular moment wasn't, but as soon as everything breaks, it's complicated. You had to hit the-

Chris: It's a lot of people, too.

Christine: A lot of people in play.

John: This was kind of complicated to figure out, I'm mean- I think I was- I was up in the room. Remember? I came down, you were like ‘Ok, we've got everything except how they get out of the vault.’ And I was like, ‘That's kind of a big thing, guys.’ And then it was Mythbusters that came to the rescue.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: I remembered-

Christine: As usual.

John: The det cord for the instant burn through. Well, it was originally thermite.

Chris: It came from two things - it came from det cord and the fact that we had tunnels available in Portland that we had not- on our list of unused locations. We had these fantastic tunnels and that were used- weren't they used to take people onboard ships?

John: They were press gangs. Shanghai tunnels.

Jeremiah: They were press gangs. In other words, they were bars and they used to get people drunk. Shanghai them, punch them out, take them down to the tunnels, wake up at sea.

John: Exactly how I run the writers room.

Christine: What? I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Jeremiah: Exactly how I became a Director.

John: Boylan was working on another show, and you came to a cocktail party we had and she woke up in our writers room-

Christine: I have no memory of this. What, am I on cable now?

Jeremiah: Me, I remember working on in, you know, probably a death ship Shanghaied and woke up and I was in the DG].

Christine: I used to be a pirate, I don’t know what happened.

Chris: Here we go, here's the fogger.

Christine: Oh the fog, and that red light off the fog is great.

John: Yeah, nice choice. And then the reset to sort of reestablish the geography and -

Jeremiah: -what happened.

John: Again, we have very strict rules about how you use these shots, and this is a nice-

Chris: I knew when I read the script, this was gonna be my favorite shot.

Christine: I love the-

Jeremiah: Nice, good chemistry.

Christine: Oh these two.

Jeremiah: Beth’s look, beautiful.

John: Cause he's a little oblivious right at that moment.

Christine: A little high from the heist as well.

John: And then the moment-

[Laughter]

Chris: Sex and violence folks. Right there, that's a sex/violence sandwich.

Christine: Yes it is. Who doesn’t like a sex/violence sandwhich?

John: What’s the bread on a sex/violence sandwich?

Christine: You don't need bread, it’s carb free. 

John: It’s carb free, it's all meat.

Jeremiah: Or all bread.

Christine: Or it’s all bread.

Jeremiah: If you’re into that.

John: And this was great-

Jeremiah: A steadicam in the vault like this, moving was challenging, obviously.

Chris: It’s hard.

John: There's not a lot of room in there, right.

Jeremiah: No, not a lot of room. And again, Gary, our operator, really brilliant. And this had to move to land on specific lines. We did it a lot. I was very focused on just hitting exactly the right beats and ending up in the right place.

Christine: And speaking of brilliant actors-

John: Lieutenant Bonanno. What's really nice was, we finally- it was nice to start to develop a recurring character that we could go to for law enforcement, and it sort of built the Leverage world and he-

Jeremiah: Into the diamonds!

John: He actually became super important in the season finale. We were looking for someone to use in the season finale and that became a character. Now, mostly because we love the Columbo and he really rocks the Columbo.

Jeremiah: He also enjoys doing this a lot.

Christine: He is a pleasure on set, and so consistent.

Jeremiah: Yeah, he’s wonderful.

John: We beat the hell out of him in the finale, too, and he did everything we could throw at him. And now the villain suffers. That’s Dean’s rule.

Chris: Dean’s rule.

John: The villain must suffer and there's always a little gloat going on.

Christine: Often a petard hoist of some kind.

Chris: Here we go.

Jeremiah: Love this shot.

Christine: Look at that.

John: Where the hell is that?

Christine: Edge of nowhere.

Jeremiah: That is under the pulp paper plant on the river.

Chris: Nice.

John: And that was part of- that was really hanging a lantern.

Jeremiah: Like, that is Portland.

John: And that's- well that's Boston, it’s Boston.

Jeremiah: That’s the joy- sorry, Boston.

John: No no no, that's the joy of Portland is, you got all of these really interesting places that haven't been shot at.

Jeremiah: And it was joyful to do that.

John: That was really hanging a lantern on it was, we said this heist wouldn't work earlier and that's the key. We’re actually going to just lay it out in dialogue.

Christine: And this was Joey Cospito, named for my uncle. I just have to say during the commentary, he’s a sweetheart.

Chris: Oh that’s nice.

Jeremiah: Also his softening is good here. He's very soft, I love this guy; it’s great.

John: It's a nice payoff and it’s-

Christine: Beautiful scene, these two.

John: Yeah, it was really tricky. 

Jeremiah: Cash!

John: Yeah, ordinarily we don't have Nate alone in these scenes and Tim’s, kind of, choosing how Nate plays this was an interesting beat. He doesn't usually- he does some version of the hand off with Sophie or one of the other characters.

Jeremiah: Now he liked doing this scene, he liked working opposite Vince.

John: Of Vince? That’s cool.

Jeremiah: Yeah, loved it.

John: No, that was a smooth flip. This is a dense script; this is an awful lot going on in this.

Christine: I don't know what you're talking about.

John: I don't mean in the usual way, which I'm trying to cut down one of your four-page speeches in actual dialogue.

Christine: You love them!

John: Yeah.

Christine: You love them.

Chris: Using every part of the animal there.

Christine: What did I get to write this year? Cockney, Irish...

Jeremiah: I use every part of the animal, and that's just in pre-production.

John: This is great. This is the family- the brother dynamic.

Jeremiah: Hug it out.

Christine: Ad lib!

John: Hug it out this time, and then the roll, she’s still pissed and then- 

Christine: Oh that’s so-

John: You can see him starting to lose it, too. 

Christine: He's laughing.

John: Chris really can't hold it together.

Jeremiah: Now this was a nice, intimate moment. Tim and I really talked about this. I really wanted these moments to be ver,y very charged from his point of view. Because I thought this was the opportunity to invest as much in that relationship, and in the complexity of their relationship. And just seated him alone, and shoot him alone. And I was- we had a good time working on it and dug in with it.

John: This is actually a book end to a huge moment in the finale. We actually- we do the second version of this where he’s, you know, the same but different speech. 

Jeremiah: As well?

John: Yes. Not quite as well as this, but the most epically beautiful phone call in television history, Jeremiah; I hope you’re happy. But no, this is- this feels like a coda. It's actually one of the most important moments of the season. Because it really is the moment where Sophie is just like, ‘You know what? I'm actually getting better and you’re not.’

Jeremiah: And here he can't say goodbye. He just can't say goodbye, and he wants to stay on the phone. And I worked that, and I wanted to really make sure he just couldn't hang up.

John: He doesn’t have the emotional equipment for what he's dealing with right now, you know? This is a shut down, angry guy.

Christine: Right.

John: And yeah, even that little frustration look right there, like, ‘Alright, that didn't go like I hoped.’

Christine: Oh, here it is.

Chris: Nice long shot here. You see his isolation.

John: Isolation.

Jeremiah: Very. And her-

John: And then she's done with it.

Christine: There it goes.

John: Yeah. I love she's wearing the mink in the bar.

Chris: Yeah, the mink.

Christine: The mink and that giant cocktail.

John: Yeah. Well that was fun, guys. Do you have anything you wanna say to the nice folks watching before we take off? 

Christine: I adore this episode, I adore working with Jeremiah, and I adore everyone here. That's- it’s scotch talking.

Jeremiah: You love everyone.

Chris: [Slurring] ‘Let me tell you another thing!’

Christine: Scotch talking. Let me tell you something else, bartender.

John: This is the scotch-driven commentary. Thank you for watching the episode. 

Christine: Thank you for watching.

John: And watch the next one, it’s very good.

Jeremiah: Yeah, watch many more, because they're all good.

[writingfortoomanyfandoms]

INY - Hood Family

I figured before I put out the Fifteen Years Later fic I should do a little thing about the Hood family from the I Need You universe seeing as though previously I’ve only posted about the twins, so here you can check up on some basic information about the other Hood children, as with the twins I’ve left it fairly open ended so that we can expand on the family together on the blog and so yeah! I hope you enjoy!

Leo Thomas Hood

Birthday: 19th November 2020 (the eldest, by 27 minutes)

Nicknames: UNDECIDED

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

Favourite Uncle: Michael (but he does his best to keep that a secret) (but also, given the choice, he’d pick Mali every time)

Favourite Superhero: Quicksilver (shoutout to @angiefangirlworld-2​ ‘s fucking ADORABLE concept from the twin night)

Hobbies: Football

Closest to: Maia (obvs)

Small description/blurb thing: Rather shy in comparison to Maia, very quiet and soft spoken, takes after Calum in that regard. He’s pretty smart, a lot more focused on his studies than Maia and the more responsible of the two twins. While he may not seem it at first, he is actually rather sporty as well

Maia Elizabeth Hood

Birthday: 19th November 2020 (don’t remind her that she’s the younger twin)

Nicknames: She’s got quite a few that I can’t remember just now but Mayo is sticking in my mind but she hates that a lot

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Favourite Uncle: Luke (and she’s not at all afraid to show it)

Favourite Superhero: Wanda/Scarlet Witch (again see the concept)

Hobbies: Painting, guitar (Luke taught her)

Closest to: Leo (obvs)

Small description/blurb thing: Much more outgoing, incredibly nerdy, though you wouldn’t think it at first, into make-up and again is far more girly than Calum or any of the other guys thought she would be but very sure of herself and outspoken, she stands up for what she believes in and is rather popular at school

Theodore David Hood

Birthday: N/A 2022

Nicknames: Theo

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Favourite Uncle: Michael

Favourite Superhero: Falcon/Winter Soldier (the duo, essentially he’s Team Cap)

Hobbies: Reading, superhero films, lowkey loves gardening as well

Closest to: Probably Leo, but he’s kinda the odd sibling out and often feels like he’s not very close to any of them, which is pretty sad my poor soft boy

Small description/blurb thing: Not quiet or introverted but he keeps to himself, he always has a book with him, gets good grades and is probably the most responsible of them, often gets sad and lonely, as I said he regularly kinda feels like he’s the odd child out

Sophie Hood

Birthday: N/A 2025

Nicknames: Soph, Soap (exclusively by Kara)

Hogwarts House: Gryffindor

Favourite Uncle: Ashton

Favourite Superhero: Iron Man (naturally it is a source of argument between her and Theo)

Hobbies: Singing, dancing, superhero films

Closest to: Kara

Small description/blurb thing: Definitely the loudest of the Hood family, Sophie is very bubbly and warm, often very impulsive. She always wants to make sure that everyone is happy and at ease, always very optimistic and a complete joy tbh

Kara Hood

Birthday: N/A 2027

Nicknames: UNDECIDED

Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw

Favourite Uncle: She genuinely doesn’t have one and gets quite upset when they pretend to argue over it

Favourite Superhero: Spider-Man (she doesn’t properly understand superhero films but she likes that he can climb walls)

Hobbies: ‘Gardening’ (she likes getting muddy and planting seeds), ‘baking’ (helping her mother in the kitchen, keeping her company and the like) and imitating Kara

Closest to: Kara

Small description/blurb thing: She’s the shyest and most of the time just follows Sophie around, knowing that she really doesn’t mind her tagging along all the time. She’s the most emotional of them, likely as a result of being the youngest, but is also the smartest (though ofc that doesn’t show at the moment because in the coming up fic she’s 8 years old)

[bobdylanrevisited]

The Basement Tapes

Released: 26 June 1975

Rating: 10/10

Following the motorcycle crash in 1966 that put an end to his ‘electric era’, Dylan and his new family moved to Woodstock, outside of the public eye. So to did his backing band, The Hawks later known as The Band, and during Bob’s recovery the musicians would meet up and record songs nearly every day for almost a year. Though recorded in 1967, there was no official release until 1975, when Bob finally gave permission to Robbie Robertson (guitarist for The Band), to select and mix tracks from these sessions. This review will be different to my others, as many of the songs do not require individual analysis, but rather I want to focus on three specific areas: the recording, Robbie’s choice of songs, and the highlights. The Basement Tapes is not only one of the best albums of the 20th century, strangely enough it’s also one of the most frustrating, due to an apathetic Bob and outside influence.

The Recording: I believe the recording sessions came about due to two very different reasons. The first is because Bob used it as his therapy. The motorcycle crash put his lifestyle into perspective and he morphed into a brand new man, as discussed in my ‘John Wesley Harding’ post. Gone were the days of acid and avant-garde, hanging out in New York’s high society art scene and facing down an audience of former fans and folk fanatics. He now chose anonymity, a simpler family life, and a return to less ‘controversial’ music. You only need to see his physical change from 1966 to ‘67 to see that this is not the same person who was booed at the Free Trade Hall. By ‘67 Bob has recorded seven albums in just five years, being laid up after the crash must have been hell for a young artist who had always stayed constantly moving.

The second reason is almost the antithesis of Bob wanting to record to stay creative and play with his friends. The crash had taken a high earning artist off the tour circuit and, as is often the way things go, some fat cat was losing revenue and wanted to recoup losses. Dylan stated in 1969 that he was being pressured into writing songs that could be sold and recorded by other popular acts, therefore still making him a valuable asset for record labels. Although it only seems like a handful of songs were actually recorded purely as demos to produce covers, and the majority of the songs do seem to be the musicians playing only for themselves, it is still a grim indictment on the industry that Bob was hounded to still produce hits after nearly dying just a few months prior.

The Band bought the now famous house ‘Big Pink’ very close to where the Dylan’s now resided, and according to Rick Danko (the bass player), Bob would constantly come round either with a new song ready to go or they’d all sit around and improvise until they’d figured out the words. This is the beauty of The Basement Tapes, it’s less about the individual songs, it’s more about the way it perfectly captures a feeling. That feeling of being with friends and having a laugh. That feeling of synchronicity you have with those closest to you. It also oozes Americana, an alluring mix of folk and country, with acoustic guitars and pianos creating lively songs about everything and nothing. Bob’s voice is relaxed and effortless, a million miles away from ‘Blonde On Blonde’. The tunes are slower and often happy, and it’s almost like the jaded beatnik of the prior three years had let all ill-will go. It’s somehow the perfect album for all seasons, whether it be a summers evening in the garden with a drink, or a winters evening wrapped up on the sofa, it’s perfectly evergreen. Despite my love for the album and the Bob we encounter on this record, there is an unavoidable problem with this release, and that problem is Robbie Robertson.

The Tracklist: Following ‘Blood On The Tracks’ and his critical standing seemingly returned to his mid ‘60s high point, Bob finally gave permission for the long bootlegged basement recordings to be made public. However, he wasn’t really interested in how these recordings were released, so Robbie Robertson took the task upon himself. This leads to the biggest problem with the album and the legacy of the recordings: the songs that were left off, and the songs Robbie faked to replace them.

Many classics were written and recorded during the legendary sessions. ‘Quinn The Mighty Eskimo’ had been a huge hit for Manfred Mann and had been performed live by Bob. Similarly, ‘Minstrel Boy’ had been part of his Isle Of Wight set in 1969. ‘I Shall Be Released’ had also been a staple of live shows, as well as appearing on Bob’s Greatest Hits Volume 2 in 1971 (albeit a different and better studio recording). So why the fuck were these omitted from official release?! Who could possibly hear the pure genius of ‘I’m Not There’ or ‘Sign On The Cross’ and decide the public didn’t deserve to fall in love with its weird and mysterious ramblings. Of course with The Bootleg Series Vol. 11: The Complete Basement Tapes eventually being released in 2014, everyone finally got to hear a properly mixed catalogue of these amazing months of musical perfection, yet it may have been 39 years too late thanks to Robbie’s bizarre song choice.

Of the 24 tracks on the album, 8 do not feature Dylan nor were recorded during the basement period. These are unreleased The Band songs which Robbie added to the album. Now, I want to make it clear that after Bob, The Band are my favourite musical artists, but there is something very disingenuous of Robbie to pretend that these songs were anything to do with Bob and the mythos of his reclusive year. Their studio recordings were even mixed to sound more raw, to match the rest of the album. It’s honestly mind blowing that a third of the album is taken up with these tracks, when the aforementioned classics were saved just for bootleggers and collectors. Whilst I still adore the album, Robbie’s ego and self promotion leaves a bitter taste.

The Highlights: As previously mentioned, the songs themselves are often short and simple, and they don’t require lyrical analysis. However, there are 3 tracks I did quickly want to mention.

12. Tears Of Rage - One of the darker songs on this otherwise happy album, Dylan’s singing here is incredible, as are his harmonies with The Band’s Richard Manuel. It’s one of my favourites on the album.

19. You Ain’t Goin’ Nowhere - A happy song of love and unity (remember this was recorded during Bob and Sara’s happy days despite being eventually released during their break up). The recording on this album is great, however I urge you to listen to the 1971 studio version found on Greatest Hits Vol. 2 as it’s one of my favourite Dylan songs from the Woodstock period.

24. This Wheel’s On Fire - Similar to ‘Tears Of Rage’, this is dark, weird, and infinitely more memorable than most of the album. By far the best track, Dylan was still at his songwriting best when tackling metaphor and challenging imagery.

Verdict: As I previously said, this album is a cultural document of legendary artists essentially messing about. It’s a truly fantastic record, in spite of Robertson’s best efforts, and each song from the basement sessions makes you wish you could have been there, chilling amongst mates and being ludicrously creative every single day. However, this album is only a great introduction to these mesmerising recordings, it is essential you listen to The Bootleg Series Vol. 11: The Complete Basement Tapes. It is a joy to listen to the 138 tracks and find your new favourite, or find a hidden gem that Dylan likely forgot the second he stopped singing it. That being said, if you don’t want to sift through that many tracks, many of which are admittedly nonsense or badly recorded, then the 24 track album is still a brilliant overview which you’re sure to fall in love with. Following this release, we go back to Bob during his tumultuous marriage breakdown, his carnival live shows, and an album filled with mystique and violins.

[ofrxvia]

𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓  ,  𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓  𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆!  tag  six  muns  you  would  like  to  get  to  know  better  when  done!

name : Wulfenstine

nickname : Wulf

age : 28

faceclaim :  Ainz Ooal Gown - OVERLORD

pronouns :  he/him

height :  5′8″

birthday : March 23

aesthetics : Nordic Pagan, Books, Mountains, Snow, Storms, Crows, Ravens, Winter, Animal Skulls.

favorite  muse  you’ve  written : oof. Ever? That’s hard. I’ve got to say Hollow Ichigo, but I called him Shirosaki. I was in that fandom for a very, very long time. And I made lifelong friends there. Hell, I lived with one for six months! But maybe that’s why he’s my favorite more than he himself. I did so enjoy my Loki, but that was a really edgy purple prose phase (I fucking loved it)

what  inspired  you  to  take  on  your  current  muse(s) : I’ll start with my oc, @varbjxrn . He was a challenge I made for myself. I wanted to make an OC, but not some random plug in to an existing place. So, I took my favorite shit, the VIKINGS, and threw in some were-bear action, and really threw myself into the story. I’m kinda proud of it, and I know it gets vague at the end but I wanted it open for roleplay. I feel I wrote a believable story, I do. And I feel I portray that well in writing him. Geralt; I was getting through Witcher 3 for the first time, and this was like, a few months after release. I was maybe halfway through the game. I remember distinctly, crossing the lake with Lambert and Geralt goes “Wanna hear a limerick? Lambert, Lambert, What a prick.” I had to do it. I made a page shortly after that, and that was the tagline I used on it.

what  are  your  favorite  aspects  of  your  current  muse(s) : Geralt, and it might sound bad but I like it, is reliable. I’m not saying I can pull his muse out of anywhere, he still needs prodding sometimes, but, when he is there, I have a good feeling I’ve got him down. I feel like his voice is still there, recognizable. Sverre? It’s just fun. Even when I’m writing something sad or emotional for the poor man, or planning to put him through even BIGGER trauma, I’m excited to see how he evolves. And it’s so much fun to make him more real with every addition, good or bad.

what’s  your  biggest  inspiration  when  it  comes  to  writing : Music. If I REALLY get into a writing mood, I need music. I will loop a song until I’m done. However, I don’t do this often, because my self control goes out the window sometimes, and I’ll write a mile long post. I think I hit....18 Para on one? For like, 4 consecutive posts? My head hurt after that.

favorite  types  of  threads : I’m a fluffy boy. I like feeling warm and fuzzy shut up. ANYWAY, aside from that, probably would say I like a well rounded thread the best. Unfortunately, those take a lot of time, and a lot of investment, like start to finish kind of shit. I’m essentially trying to write a D&D campaign as a story. That’s a long fucking story lmao.

biggest  struggle  in  regards  to  your  current  muse(s) : Geralt...Despite my knowing that I do a pretty decent Geralt, I am constantly comparing myself with other Geralt’s. And I couldn’t help but always feel like they were just better. It made it hard to want to...stay around. I’ve been working on that, and would like to stick around a bit more now! Sverre; Well, this is kind of self inflicted. Sverre is really pretty much the bear he turns into, as much as he tries to think they’re two different things, they’re not. So I’m waking him up after a long-ass winter and he’s being slow about it.  Not grumpy, just slow.

Stolen from: @evermerciful

tagging: @iigniiferroque, @nightscng, @wcrstarter, @mandragoraregum, @slainchosen,  and whoever wants to steal it. Be my guest!