#2002Movies

[cellphonemuseum]

In Day Another Day (2002) movie featured the Sony Ericsson P800 that was powered by Symbian UIQ and featured a unique flip cover (hardware keypad) #dieanotherday #2002 #2002movie #jamesbond #jamesbondphone #piercebrosnan #hallyberry #2002nostalgia #madonna #retroframez #oldschool #oldphone #sonyericssoncollection #sonyericsson #veryrare #p800 #symbianuiq #uiq #oldschool #oldphone #flip #flipphone #vintagephone #vintage #unbox #handmade #artwork #walldecor #oldtech #from2002 https://www.instagram.com/p/Cnl70ResUpf/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[baeaisling]

Keira Knightley‘s “Bend it like Beckham” interview with Jimmy Fallon (March 15, 2023)

Credits: @fallontonight #benditlikebeckham @rocmedias @20thcenturystudios #sheppertonstudios

#keiraknightley #jonathanrhysmeyers #jrm #parmindernagra #jonathanrhysmeyerswhereare #circa2002 #classicsportsmovies #jonathanrhysmeyersedit #thetonightshow #thetonightshowstarringjimmyfallon #lovetriangle #romcommovies #2002movies #teenagemovies #teenmovies #20thcenturyfox #rocmedia

[adamwatchesmovies]

Pinocchio (2002)

Ill-conceived from beginning to end, 2002's Pinocchio unleashes a storm of questions while lying on the ground, whimpering and struggling to survive. Who thought this was a good idea, and what kind of sales pitch did they have? It should've been as obvious as the sun in the sky that this adaptation of Carlo Collodi's novel was not going to work.

Out of a wooden log, Old Gepetto (Carlo Giuffrè) carves a puppet that springs to life thanks to the magic of the Blue Fairy (Nicoletta Braschi). Wandering around town, "Pinocchio" (Roberto Benigni) means well but can’t help but be led astray. Only by learning to be good can Pinocchio become a real boy.

Going in, all I knew about Roberto Benigni's Pinocchio was that it was reviled and that the director played the puppet. Who thought this was a good idea? I don’t know. A 50-year old playing a wooden puppet that wants to become a real boy? It sounds like a gag-within-a-gag on a TV show that can only afford 4 cast members. Here’s something to blow your mind even further. Pinocchio’s not even a puppet. The film insists he is. Over and over his wooden construction is brought to our attention, but you couldn’t tell. They couldn’t even be bothered to put makeup on Benigni!

Forget Pinocchio’s Revenge. If you want a creepy film about a puppet coming to life, you watch this. Everyone knows that Pinocchio’s nose grows when lies. Can you imagine a 50-year-old with an elongated flesh wand protruding from his face? This sickening thought is a trivial detail compared to the innumerable sins this picture commits. Not only is Pinocchio played by a full-grown man; every child is. It’s like a trip to a mental asylum, a glimpse into a world where adults purposefully stunt their growth or a re-enactment of a crime that includes innocent souls trapped into a basement dungeon.

I don’t want to give this film zero stars. You could argue that it looks good, that it offers a couple of funny moments but giving Pinocchio a drop from the bottle of compliments makes me want to throw up. There’s a giant that comes out of nowhere, the special effects are bad, the voice acting (originally the film was in Italian so I saw the dub) is wooden, and it can’t even wrap its mind around its central concept properly. Pinocchio encounters a puppet show, and the other marionettes can speak too! If he looks human and talking isn’t a skill that’s unique to magical puppets, what in the inferno is going on?

This is Benigni's ultimate vanity project. That’s why he chose himself as Pinocchio even though no casting director in the world would've given him an audition. That’s why there are so many strange would-be whimsical decisions throughout. This man decided he was the one that would do this fairytale right - something no one else, not even the author - had previously managed. It's why the iconic whale has been changed into a shark and the message about lying being wrong has been omitted.

I'm embarrassed to admit I saw Pinocchio. Even if you’re morbidly curious, it’s agonizing to watch.  It's like witnessing your kid make a college graduation speech about the Earth being flat. You'd rather spontaneously combust than see it all the way through. It feels like an eternity, an increasingly unbearable experience that will have you begging for death. It’s the worst film I’ve seen in a long time. (English Dub on DVD, February 5, 2016)

[aidene]

City of God (2002)

"If you run, the beast catches you; if you stay, the beast eats you."

We find ourselves in the City of God. A city that lucks everything we have seen. In this city gangs, drugs and violence are dominant. Life is tough, and you have to fight in order to survive. If you are lucky you could live through the age of 20 but you will lose something far more important, your childhood. "Rocket" is a child living in the City of God in the 60s and the only thing that he loves is photography. But sometimes you cannot choose your future.

This movie is so powerful and authentic unlike anything else I have ever seen. And that is because it screams "Reality". It shows us, how difficult life is for some people in ways that we cannot even imagine. Away from the comfort of our lives. The movie doesn't overreact. It isn't polite. It's goal isn't the happy ending. It's goal is to show you simply how things are. The cost of life is nonexistent, survival can be accidental in a gang-ruled city and with the police being absolutely absent and bought.

Based on the book of the same name by Paulo Lins, who moved to the "City of God" at the age of 7, this movie was a huge success in Brazil and was nominated for four Oscars and many other awards. It is absolutely worth seeing, but you should be prepared for something you have never seen before!!

Genre: Drama, Crime

Directed by: Fernando Meirelles

Written by: Bráulio Mantovani, Paulo Lins

[estelcts]

Quand on arrive dans une ville, on voit des rues en perspective. Des suites de bâtiments vides de sens. Tout est inconnu, vierge. Voilà, plus tard on aura marché dans ces rues, on aura été au bout des perspectives, on aura connu ces bâtiments, on aura vécu des histoires avec des gens. Quand on aura vécu dans cette ville, cette rue on l’aura prise dix, vingt, mille fois. Au bout d’un temps cela vous appartient parce qu’on y a vécu.

L’auberge espagnole, Xavier.

[jenniferneyhart]

Top 5 Favorite Movies of 2002: 1. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers 2. Equilibrium 3. Spider-Man 4. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones 5. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets See the rest at www.jenniferneyhart.com (Link in Profile) #movies #favoritemovie #favoritemovies #top5movies #lotr #lotrmovies #lotrmovie #thelordoftherings #thetwotowers #equilibrium #equilibriummovie #spiderman #spiderman2002 #starwars #starwarsepisode2 #attackoftheclones #harrypotter #harrypottermovies #harrypottermovie #harrypotterandthechamberofsecrets #2002 #2002movie #2002movies

[wedopix]

Movie Review - Blade 2 (2002) In 3/23/2002, we saw the release of the sequel to the 1998 film. Wesley Snipes returns to his iconic role to fight the creatures of the night once again. The plot revolves around a new breed of genetically enhanced vampires known as Reapers, which not only feed on humans, but other vampires as well. This forces the vampire society to join forces with Blade to fight back an epidemic threat. The plot is darker & more violent than the first. Instead of being straightforward, the story expands the mythology, the characters are more developed & memorable. The movie is given a more comic book look which fans adored. & the direction for this movie is far better than the original. Wesley Snipes is awesome as always. Although he's hardly given any dialogue, he shows off more of his martial arts moves than the last movie, making it more awesome & enjoyable. Kris Kristofferson makes a comeback although he was supposed to be killed off in the last movie but was brought back by popular demand. Norman Reedus makes an appearance before ever starring in the renown TV show The Walking Dead. He gives a very relaxed & decent performance as engineer with a stoner's personality for comedic reasons. Luke Goss makes himself known to the movie world as the antagonist Jared Nomak. He gives a very dark & threatening performance, making him an extremely memorable villain. The only faults I find with this movie, is that the fight scenes are not as well edited as the first, & that it moves along with a fast pace that makes you wanting more. But that will not stop the viewers from enjoying this movie. A stunning & excellent sequel that surpasses it's predecessor almost in every way. Verdict: 9.2/10 #Blade2 #WesleySnipes #KrisKristofferson #NormanReedus #RonPerlman #LukeGoss #2002Movies #ComicBook #ComicBookFlicks #ActionFlicks #VampireMovies #Marvel #MarvelComics #MovieCritic #MovieReviews #HalloweenMonth #MonsterMadness

[ellesanmiguel]

Amazing, this movie was back when I was a second grader. I missed it so much that's why I watch it on Youtube. I was just about to see a HD trailer, then the featured vidz stole my attention and I found this one. I didnt regret my almost-two hour with it. Too-Much of Superman, I was. Peter Parker has always been there. :DD

Here's the link:

http://youtu.be/iw6Hp9vk89M

[adamwatchesmovies]

Hero (2002)

Hero shows off the majesty and power of storytelling. It's the definition of epic, of mythic. Visually brilliant, with great use of color, memorable visuals, and breathtaking cinematography. Seeing it at home allows you to fully take in the storyline and the way it's told. You're able to appreciate the visuals and then rewind (or just rewatch the whole thing) to pay attention to the performances. You'll only regret will be that you're not in the theater with the biggest screen available.

Set in 227 BC, Hero is based on the story of the assassination attempt of the King of Qin (Chen Daoming). For years, the king has feared three assassins, all of whom have been defeated by a nameless swordsman (Jet Li). As the warrior details his battle with Broken Sword (Tony Leung), Flying Snow (Maggie Cheung), and Long Sky (Donnie Yen), certain details seem amiss.

This story evokes the contradicting Greek and Roman myths of old. The stories of the swordsman are painted with brushes of superhuman strength, epic drama, or world-shattering dilemmas. When the people in this world cry, they shed only a single tear because they are not mere mortals. They’re people whose sword thrust is so precise, so powerful that they can push themselves along the surface of a pool of water or fight within a hurricane and cut every stray branch that would hit them. It’s off-putting at first but completely appropriate considering the story.

Myths are often contradictory. Some say that Athena was born fully armed from the forehead of Zeus. Other stories describe her as the daughter of Cronus. We know these stories are made up but how did the people of ancient times rationalize these inconsistencies? “Hero” elegantly incorporates multiple, sometimes opposing depictions of the historical attempt on King Qi's life rationalized, and brought together in an intelligent and thought-provoking manner. Each character is given depth by showing how they act and how they wouldn’t act when put in a specific situation. It’s difficult to explain and sounds complicated/confusing, but it isn’t. Not when shown like this. Whether you're familiar with this epic or not, it’s easy to understand what's going on or whose story/point of view we're following due to the masterful use of color.

Director Zhang Yimou has sculpted an art film filled with high drama, love triangles, moral dilemmas, life-and-death decisions… that's also a great martial arts/wuxia film. Get ready for battles against archers, impossibly skilled swordsmen, masters of the spear, combat across water, up the steps of the royal palace, against single and dual opponents, or between a single legendary hero and an army. The mixture of wire stunts and no-frills combat is sure to satisfy any fan of Chinese action films. Or use it as a jumping-on point.

This is the equivalent of an Asgardian tale, a story whose conclusion resonates throughout human history, even if the specifics have been forgotten to time. While we admire the stunt choreography and the impact of each blow, we're also struck by its in-depth messages on the subjects of peace, war, moral dilemmas, and what it means to be a hero. The resounding soundtrack gets your blood pumping while the camera work and costume design take your breath away. Hero is nothing short of a masterpiece. (Original Mandarin with subtitles, on Blu-ray, September 11, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Comic Book Villains (2002)

Comic Book Villains is a decent dark comedy. It’s consistently amusing without being gut-bustingly hilarious, the premise is good, and - for a change - it even makes enjoyed DJ Qualls enjoyable.

When old Mrs. Cresswell (Eileen Brennan) suddenly inherits an extensive and priceless comic book collection due to her son’s untimely death, news travels to two rival comic book owners. Raymond (Donal Logue) is in the business for the love of the characters and books, while Norman and Judy Link (Michael Rapaport and Natasha Lyonne) are in it only for the money. When a shady character named Carter (Cary Elwes) gets thrown in the mix, all Archie (DJ Qualls) can do is try to prevent it all from blowing up.

The two comic book stores constantly attempting to one-up each other in order to gain the favor of an old lady who doesn’t realize she is in the possession of a priceless collection is a premise that will instantly appeal to anyone who collects anything. We've all dreamed of stumbling upon the legendary motherlode. It's what you hope for every time you visit a flea market or garage sale. What if you actually found that treasure whose owner had no idea what they had? How far would you go to get it? What happens when someone else tries to snatch it from under your nose? Helping make this fun is writer/director James Robinson, who clearly knows his comic books. There are numerous, accurate references not everyone will catch.

You get a fair amount of laughs and the ending offers tension as the rivalry starts to get really out of hand. My only issue here is that the plot misses an opportunity to talk about comic books as something you enjoy for reasons other than money. The collection is a gold mine, not a rare piece of art. There’s nothing about the artwork or the emotional connection you might have to the stories.

Although Comic Book Villains can get to a point that's a bit excessively dark, I recommend it. This is not the kind of movie that you will easily find, or that will earn itself a fancy release anytime soon, but if you happen upon it, then yeah, go ahead. There are enough enjoyable moments in its 92 minute running time to make it worth your while. (On DVD, October 9, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Hunchback of Notre Dame II (2002)

I went into The Hunchback of Notre Dame II with rock-bottom expectations. You will too once you hear its premise. Perhaps being prepared for the worst threw off my barometer because I found it “surprisingly good”.

Six years after the events of the first film, Quasimodo (Tom Hulce) is preparing to celebrate the “Jour d'Amour”, a festival in which the Parisians profess their love for all to hear. The Hunchback expects to be alone on this day until he meets a kind circus performer named Madellaine (Jennifer Love Hewitt). What the bell ringer doesn’t know is that she's being forced by the circus ringleader Sarousch (Michael McKean) to find Notre Dame's great gem-encrusted bell so he can steal it.

Look forward to hearing all of the original voice actors reprising their roles and some decent songs peppered throughout. None are memorable but they won't have you plugging your ears. While the animation is not on the same level as its theatrically released predecessor, you shouldn't expect it to be. Still, there are some tricky shots of characters spinning or birds flying that are far beyond what you'd associate with a sequel no one was asking for that was released direct-to-DVD. Tarzan 2 was horrifying to watch. I really thought this was going to be more of the same but I was pleasantly surprised.

With all that said, this movie is doomed to only go so far. The film's message is so obvious, so on the nose, it makes your eyes roll. Worse, it's a betrayal of the melancholic but honest tone of the first film - which was already extremely softened compared to the original book. The villain lacks any subtlety whatsoever and the three unfunny, vile gargoyles (voiced by Charles Kimbrough, Jason Alexander and Jane Withers) are as bad as before. What bothered me - no, baffled me most are wholly unrelated to these points. There are revelations that make me wonder if writers Flip Kobler, Cindy Marcus, and Jule Selbo even saw the first movie. Firstly, the gargoyles that Quasimodo talks to… they’re actually real. They're stone creatures who can choose to become animated or suddenly turn to stone. That one makes you wonder, as does the revelation that magic is real. I wondered how Sarousch planned on stealing a giant bell covered with sapphires, emeralds, and rubies the size of dinner plates. The answer is through sorcery. It's another head-scratcher. Six years ago, Frollo accused Esmeralda of witchcraft. When you learn there are actual wizards running around, he seems less irrational all of a sudden.

Deciding on a fair rating for The Hunchback of Notre Dame II is tricky. Is it a movie I’d recommend you go and check out? No. What if you’re a big fan of the original film? No. If you've seen every movie in your collection, your kids love Quasimodo, you have the choice between seeing this sequel or walking outside in a blizzard to get something else… then, sure. As I write these words, however, I second-doubt myself. I might not have had a horrible time, but this story is just awful. It's barely an hour long, which earns it points but what will you take away or treasure from it? Not much. In the end, I've got to give it a negative review. I might've let it slide by with a 2.5/5 but there's a bad post-credit scene and honestly, who am I kidding? Who's going to raise a stink if I say this movie's not worth seeing? No one, that's who. (On Blu-ray, June 5, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (2002)

Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever is not only bad, it’s the worst. It’s so boring it's torture. You can’t even have a good time watching this picture and making fun of it. You'll be too busy trying to untangle the nonsensical plot to have any kind of fun. The twists are so obvious that when characters don’t acknowledge each other or act surprised when information is revealed to them you'll assume you missed something, or that you're confusing an actor for another. I can hardly believe it… and it happened to me!

The plot hardly makes any sense but here goes: Michael (Aidan Drummond), the son of the CIA's director (Gregg henry as Robert) is kidnapped by former DIA agent Sever (Lucy Liu). Former FBI agent Jeremiah Ecks (Antonio Banderas) is tasked with taking her out - she won't see his non-DIA tactics coming. Things get more complicated when Ecks realizes Robert has stolen a dangerous nanobot assassin from Russia and probably wants to use it for evil.

This film's title is a misnomer. Ecks and Sever are supposed to figure out that they’re on the same side so they can team up against Robert. Why the name? who knows. If it’s supposed to be a shocking reveal, director Kaos (really making a name for himself with this one) and writers Alan B. McElroy and Peter M. Lenkov have made a twist that's just a straight line. It’s so obvious from the beginning that Robert is evil that no human being wouldn't see it coming.

The plot ludicrous developments are abundant. Ecks and Robert were romantic rivals once upon a time. Ecks was married to Vinn (Talisa Soto). Robert wanted her too. When the movie begins, Vinn is married to Robert. How? Apparently, Robert tricked them both into thinking the other was dead so Vinn could get his slimy paws on the later. Who wrote this? A random plot generator? And that’s not even a major plot point or anything. It’s a detail meant to enrich this world. Can you imagine what cinematic madness goes once the espionage and guns actually kick in?

To match the jumbled plot we have some of the worst acting from professionals I've ever seen. If I didn’t know any better, I would've sworn they used a Lucy Liu mannequin on set and that her dialogue was recorded from a studio months later during an apocalyptic hangover. It’s as if she’s embarrassed and channeling all her energy in the hopes she'll turn invisible. In any other movie, Banderas would look like the worst actor of all time, but in here he actually looks kind of good because everyone around him sucks so much.

I knew what I was getting into. Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever is considered “one of the worst movies ever made”. I imagined this would make it a fun watch with friends. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Every mind-numbing explosion, every pointlessly shot bullet, and brain-melting nonsensical development inflated our boredom. I don’t understand it. It’s as if we saw a cursed film; one that drains the life force of everyone in and around it.

Take this movie, and blast it to smithereens with a gun. Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever is 91 agonizing minutes of anti-fun. You might not believe it's as bad as they say. Believe me, it’s worse! I don't need to see every movie in the world to know this must be the worst theatrically-released action flick ever made. (On DVD, March 27, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Assassination Tango (2002)

I should have known this movie was going to be bad from the title. Assassination Tango? It sounds like the subtitle of a bad dancing movie. Breakin’ 3: Assassination Tango. Step-Up: Assassination Tango. Don’t watch this movie. It's nothing but a vanity project from Robert Duvall, who wrote, directed, produced, and stars in this dull wannabe thriller.

Anderson (Robert Duvall) is an elderly assassin tasked with taking out a former general in Argentina. While preparing for the assignment, he spots a woman dancing the tango and becomes obsessed with the music, rhythm, and steps. As he befriends the tango instructor (Luciana Pedraza as Manuela) he prepares to carry out his mission.

While watching, two questions kept popping into my head. “Why?” and “Who cares?” Why was this movie made? So Robert Duvall could play a cool killer who dates a woman way younger than him and show off his love of tango. Who cares if an elderly assassin suddenly finds a new hobby while on assignment? Robert Duvall. This is one of the most self-indulgent movies I’ve ever seen. It's obvious from the opening credits and how many times Duvall's name appears, from the "introduction” of Luciana Pedraza, whom he would eventually marry Duvall and has only been in two films - both with Duvall.

The plot? Merely an excuse for the audience to witness the wonder that is tango, but not in the same way that other movies about dance. This story is about an assassination and then there’s this boring side plot where and old guy rubs himself all over this much younger and attractive woman because he instantly falls in love with her dance moves. It feels like a nasty trick; as if Duvall was hoping to legitimize his fascination for the dance by telling audiences “Come check out my movie! I’m an assassin in it!” but actually, all he wanted to show people was his awesome footwork.

Let’s try and move on. Yes, the dancing is unnecessary and also not particularly interesting, but could that be simply a flaw in an otherwise good film? If only. While viewing Assassination Tango I frequently grew frustrated with the way it played out because it’s sloppy. From the very beginning, I didn’t buy the casting. Robert Duvall as an assassin? don't make me laugh. I could see a cutthroat that’s an older guy, but he's balding with a bad ponytail to cover up how much hair he's missing and all of the scenes which show him without a shirt make it clear he's not in great shape. A second strike is the more personal side of the assassin’s life, with him dating a younger woman. Our lead is 71, she’s 52. Kathy Baker plays the girlfriend, who has a daughter that’s about 10. It felt so weird to me seeing this trio. She’s too old to have this daughter, he feels more like a grandfather than a boyfriend or stepdad. You get all kinds of bad vibes.

Once again, we're getting sidetracked with superficial flaws. Let's get back on track. This is one sloppy assassin. He doesn’t keep a low profile while on assignment, he practically paints a target on himself as he puts his plan together, he doesn’t get the right equipment for the hit and his lack of foresight means he sucks. His contract is in Argentina. It isn't merely a country or two away from his home, it's on another continent. Why would you assume that a job so high-profile they have to ask a killer from thousands of kilometers away to do it would be something you can knock out in a couple of days? The whole thing smells like trouble from the beginning, so just say NO!

Assassination Tango would have been a whole lot better if it had been much worse. If only Duvall really pushed his gross fantasies by bedding tons of attractive Latin women or if we got foot chases, explosions, and ridiculous plot twist. Then it would've still been bad but also entertaining. This is nearly two hours of boredom. No one aside from the cast and crew could possibly be interested in this vanity project. (On DVD, April 1, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Dog Soldiers (2002)

For years, I assumed the only noteworthy werewolf films could be counted on a single hand. With Dog Soldiers, we finally need more than five digits. It’s a few edits and a quick re-writes from being the best it could be, but this is an effective horror action movie.

On a routine training exercise, a company of Irish soldiers encounters a pack of werewolves. Taking refuge inside a house with a local woman (Emma Cleasby), Wells (Sean Pertwee), Cooper (Kevin McKidd), "Spoon" (Darren Morfitt), Joe (Chris Robson), and Terry (Leslie Simpson) have to hold the fort until morning when their attackers change back into human form.

Let's address the blemishes to get them out of the way. The very first and final scenes are contrived. The former ties into the later but introducing a sterling silver letter opener screams “plot point” and gives away we're watching a werewolf movie - if it wasn't obvious from the cover. There had to be a better way to do it.

Are you tired of seeing the full moon rise over and over in those other werewolf movies? Here the issue is avoided because everything takes place in a single night. It’s so obvious I’m surprised no one’s thought of it before. Another example of great writing is the setting. This is essentially a home invasion movie. The soldiers didn't know they were heading into a werewolf movie so they didn’t pack silver bullets. They're outnumbered and outgunned. All they have is ingenuity, strategy, their weapons, and each other. They may not be able to instantly kill the wolf-men, but they don't need to. Their objective is to survive. As resources dwindle, the intensity grows. Dawn is growing near but their ammunition keeps decreasing and people start biting the dust.

Dog Soldiers does something few werewolf films do well; the whole “curse” thing. Saying too much would give things away but there are some nice revelations when we learn what makes a werewolf and what the transformation entails. It allows the story to bypass the familiar plot points we see in every single bad werewolf movie while keeping the best elements.

Another strength is the characters. Each one is unique. Bits of dialogue here or there establish this guy as a soccer fan, this one as an animal lover. The character dynamics keep you interested even when the monsters aren't attacking and make you care about who lives and dies. It alternates between sequences of action, drama, and horror. Topped with some good dialogue and good special effects, it strikes a nice balance. You can tell writer/director Neil Marshall likes horror movies and wanted to make one that addressed the issues he saw in the others. He might not have had a huge budget but he made the most of it.

Dog Soldiers will appeal to fans of both supernatural horror and the more “down to Earth” realistic “home invasion” genres. It affectionately borrows from movies like Predator and Alien while standing on its own. It starts off rocky but the bulk of the story is strong enough to make you forgive the clunky caps. The film sits comfortably along An American Werewolf in London, The Howling, Ginger Snaps and The Wolfman as a great werewolf movie. Vampires and zombie pictures are dirt cheap to shoot. Lycanthropy is much harder so you've got to put some work into finding a good one and "Dog Soldiers" is just what you've been looking for. (On Blu-ray, May 22, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Equilibrium (2002)

It's easy to see what makes Equilibrium appealing to some but this dystopian action film has a fatal flaw that unfortunately cripples it beyond repair. It's a lot less intelligent than it thinks it is.

Set after a third world war in the early 21st century, cleric John Preston (Christian Bale) is part of an elite task force charged with taking down “sense offenders”. In this future, emotions are outlawed and people repress them using medication. When an accident at home causes Preston to miss a dose, he becomes a sense offender himself.

You see what the film's trying to do. Artwork, music, poetry, fiction, love, basically anything creative, anything that could arouse emotion or derived from emotion is outlawed. Unfortunately, the set and costume designers couldn't help themselves and didn't quite commit. If the people of this dystopia were truly determined to eliminate everything associated with emotions, then everyone’s clothes should be the same, every building should look the same, every surface should have the same texture and color. On paper, this wouldn't be an issue but in a movie, you've got to overlook a lot. Let's say you do. Even then, you spot flaws right away. This entire civilization depends on self-medication and it only takes one missed dose to send cracks throughout the system. We've seen similar scenarios work elsewhere, which is probably the issue. This is not a novel idea and the execution isn't smart enough to make us forgive this fact.

Not helping are the performances. Everyone's too good! I’ve seen plenty of awful actors that would have been perfect for the roles of emotionless, robot-like workers in a society that oppresses all feelings. Instead, Kurt Wimmer employs men and women who can’t not emote. No one should be delivering a wink or a smile after that one-liner, or screaming as they’re about to die. I hate to hang onto this point for so long but this is where a simple re-write would've done wonders. Instead of no emotion, just say they're severely suppressed.

You wonder why someone could enjoy the film? Because of the action. The moves our supercop displays while apprehending criminals is truly awesome. Gunshots are merged with martial arts in a spectacular and unique genre of combat - gun kata. When you see it in action, you forget about everything that rubbed you the wrong way previously. It isn’t just one big fight towards the end either. There are numerous action sequences throughout and they’re nicely varied.

Equilibirum suffers from flaws that are hard to overlook. If you're the kind of person that can be dazzled with cool fighting sequences and the idea of becoming the guy that might topple the fascist regime single-handedly entices you so much that you won’t be able to even think of the illogical bits, then you'll go nuts for this film. In that sense, I can recommend it, but only to a select audience. For everyone else, Equilibrium gets a middle-of-the-road rating, a 2,5/5. (On Blu-ray, February 7, 2015)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)

Although Bubba Ho-Tep didn’t do it for me it's likely to be a blast for you. There’s a lot to like but I think how much you laugh at this wild-concept depends heavily on how much you think erectile dysfunction, the word “ass” and toilet humor is funny.

Elvis Presley (Bruce Campbell) is alive and living in a nursing home. The King is not dead, but he will be unless he and a black J.F.K. (when they patched him up after the assassination they dyed his skin so no one would recognize him, which is why he's played by Ossie Davis) stop a soul-sucking mummy from murdering the residents of Shady Rest Retirement Home.

I love this premise. It’s so crazy it works! Elvis Presley ditched his life of fame and now he's all washed up, wishing he HAD died in 1977. He’s teaming up with a man who claims to be John F. Kennedy. What are they up against? Nothing less than a mystical threat that preys on the elderly. This movie knows its premise is ludicrous and revels in its silliness with laughable special effects and dialogue that'll make you think “Did they just say that?!”

People will tell you the monster or lead characters are their favorite things in Bubba Ho-Tep. I'd choose the recurring theme of Elvis feeling completely useless in the face of the young staff and visitors he encounters. People don't even take him seriously when he’s trying to be offensive, so obviously, no one will believe him if he tries to say the truth. There are some nice moments of reflection as Elvis contemplates what he’s been reduced to. His youth, his strength, his dignity are all gone.

The film is enjoyable despite its unhealthy obsession with Elvis’ pecker and impotence. You can’t go more than 5 minutes without Elvis reminding you he can't “get it up” anymore, that he wishes that he could feel anything down there, etc. The juvenile humor is not limited to ED. We get jokes about bowel movements; lame insults from everyone (including the mummy); and even critical plot points revolve around people getting their pants pulled down. I didn’t laugh nearly as many times as director/screenplay writer Don Coscarelli wanted me to.

As a short subject, Bubba Ho-Tep would've worked a whole lot better. You could've ditched the lengthy and repetitive flashbacks, the headache-inducing hallucination, and the recurring jokes about hard-ons. On the other hand, this may be exactly what makes it a cult classic. If you think Bubba Ho-Tep might be your kind of thing, make a point to seek it out. My rating is a positive 2,5/5. When you do, stick around for the end credits. There’s a nice written gag right at the end. (On DVD, June 29, 2015)