#100x:2020

[astonmartinii]

other side of the moon - chapter one | formula one imagine

pairing: fem retired formula one driver reader x ??? fem retired formula one driver reader x platonic!kimi antonelli

chapter one: an offer you can refuse

years of solitude has led y/n y/ln down a dark path following her career-ending injury in 2022 but one rookie seems dead set on bringing her back into the fray

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

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“have you seen this?”

it’s too early in the day to be subjected to twitter in y/n’s opinion, but her manager - the one she’s always insisted in not needing - insists upon it. sara’s hand shakes as she hands over her phone, the video already playing loudly.

the video is a poorly clipped together compilation of kimi antonelli, for no better word, gushing about her. it’s earnest and even cute, but not cute enough. the formula one paddock was a vulture pit, one y/n had only escaped three years earlier with her life - barely.

“it’s cool. that’s all it is though,” y/n moves towards the door, picking up her coat and refusing to turn back towards sara, “i’ve told you since jenson insisted i hire you, there’s no way in hell i will ever go back to that paddock. and that’s the end of it, please. i’ll do any stupid vitamin ad or female empowerment talk if it makes you happy, but i can’t go back there.”

y/n grabbed her keys and left the apartment, leaving sara in her wake. sara reached into her pocket and pulled out a tattered letter with ‘y/n’ scrawled on the front in awful handwriting. she left it on the kitchen island and left, understanding this was likely to be her last time in this apartment - there's stupid and there's what she was doing right now, there was no way she would still be employed in the morning.

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girlsonthegrid

liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 103,478 others

tagged: yourusername

girlsonthegrid: today we look back at the biggest what if for women in formula one - y/n y/ln. the 26-year-old drove for mclaren from 2020 to 2022 before she sustained a career-ending injury at silverstone. y/ln was the first ever female f1 race winner with her emphatic victory at monza in 2021 and the first ever female formula 2 champion with her win in 2019. her career lasted just 30 races and she hasn't been seen in the paddock or around any drivers since the crash. there have been reports that she has been approached about a mentor role but considering how fast her management rejected and shut down sky sports about a commentary role, this is also unlikely. what would you like to see from her if she ever comes out of hiding?

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user1: i mourn for her everyday

user2: the way she paved the way for so many but can't stand to be in the paddock to see what she did for the sport

user3: i really don't blame her

user4: doriane is the mercedes reserve and abbi is alpine's! her work is there even if she isn't and i know i'll always be grateful for that

user5: she's so overrated, if she didn't crash she still would've been out of formula 1 by now

user6: me when i'm the most wrong ever

user7: i can't believe there are still men to this day that think she wasn't great? literal world champions like max, lewis, fernando, seb and jenson have all said that she could've won a championship

user8: i mean no shade to lando but i think y/n would've made it 100x harder for max this season in that mclaren

user9: the way jenson tried to say that in the nicest way possible in las vegas lol

user10: and max agreed with him LOL

user11: the way it wasn't even proper lando shade or oscar shade like twitter painted it to be but like max just praising his bestie

user12: he does not play about her as he should

user13: i mean he's the only one we know y/n still actually talks to

user14: i can't wait for the tell-all biography that exposes half the grid because like how much have you must have fucked up for her to never speak to you again

user15: when twitter likes were public she was caught liking a bunch of tweets bout mick when he got his first points so like she doesn't even have hard feelings to the guy who put her in the barrier sooo

user16: it was proven it was break failure???? mick did nothing wrong that's why she still likes things praising him

user17: that crash really robbed us of the best ever f1 relationship with y/n and lando

user18: you know that's part of the reason that she doesn't speak to lando right?

user19: because she wished it was him not her?

user20: NO! because she hated that whole 'ship'

user21: and lando leaned into it way too much

user22: it made me a bit uncomfortable and i'm not even y/n

user23: AND she said on the beyond the grid podcast that she thought those rumours were really reductive and relegated her to just a love interest of her teammate rather than a race winner

user24: kimi antonelli please bring her back to us

user25: praying she'll listen to the literal child

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texts between y/n y/ln (bold) and max verstappen (italics)

did u give them my fucking address

my lawyer says to always deny everything?

i also actually have no idea what you are talking about…

i just got home and there’s a fucking letter from KIMI ANTONELLI on my kitchen counter

it’s creepy and a mad invasion of privacy

i did NOT give them your address?

i gave them sara’s contact details so they wouldn’t be able to directly get to you and i honestly thought she would be too scared to ask you

she showed me all the clips of him praising me.

it didn’t work.

it’s been three years y/n…

and it still hasn’t been long enough.

all i’m saying is read the letter, as creepy as it might be, he is just an 18 year old entering the lion’s den you could at least reply to him even if you don’t take up the offer

although i read they were going to pay you £10 million a year??? was that real?

unfortunately it is very real.

i didn’t think i was still worth that much

you are worth that and more, just give him a chance. we’ve both met him, he’s a sweet kid.

for now.

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it was cold in her apartment, y/n hadn’t shut the window from when she opened them that morning. in fact she hadn’t moved from the kitchen since she set eyes on the letter. it was bold she’d give him that.

the letter was crumpled as if it had gone through hell to get to her (it probably had) and the handwriting was a serious reminder of just how young kimi is. y/n had wondered if her maternal instincts would ever kick in like all the older women in her life insisted it would. sure she had felt intense feelings of love for her childhood cats and had cared her formula one cars (regina and heather, they were named after mean girls, because that is who they had to be on track) like they were children. but that true maternal feeling had never come to her, until now.

all y/n could think about was kimi. how young he was, how much he was set to lose. not everyone was her, the worst thing wasn’t going to happen to everyone - it just always seemed to happen to her.

her loud phone alarm jolted her out of her daydream, reminding her to take her painkillers. as she poured herself a glass of water, y/n slammed down the glass and ripped open the letter.

dear miss y/n y/ln my name is andrea kimi antonelli and i am going to be driving for mercedes amg f1 team in 2025. we met very briefly after i won all three races at mugello and lifted the italian f4 championship trophy. i know you were there on mclaren PR but for me it changed my life. you have always been my biggest inspiration alongside michael schumacher (i am italian, you must understand). it was always my dream to race alongside you and maybe even be teammates, i’d even betray toto and leave mercedes to make that happen (please don’t tell him i told you that). i know that can never happen now, but it could happen in another way? i know like me you grew up seeing niki lauda supporting and mentoring the mercedes drivers and i was wondering if you would be my mentor - who cares about george anyway. i know you’ve never come back to the paddock and are unlikely to do so for little old me. but if you could just think about it that would be great, if you don’t ask, you’ll never get! i hope this letter wasn’t horribly offensive, i mean it when i say you’re my favourite!!! love, kimi (p.s. i was at monza 2021, so you could even consider me a good luck charm) (p.p.s you won monza 2021 completely on merit but i was there) (p.p.p.s please don’t think i’m an idiot) (p.p.p.p.s i also loved interlagos 2020 that’s a super underrated drive)

with tears in her eyes, y/n placed the letter back on the counter, grabbed the glass of water and made her way to her bedroom. painkillers taken with a wince, she still hadn’t gotten used to the size of the pills even three years into taking them, y/n shuffled under the duvet.

the offer was there and it seemed sincere. her accountant would tell her that the money was worth the mental turmoil, even if she just did it for one season and returned to her little cave in west london.

there was no doubt she felt something for kimi - a kinship, a frienship or a maternal yearning - but was it worth ripping off all the bandages and opening herself back up to all the scrutiny again?

she would sleep on it.

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, georgerussell63 and 10,567,388 others

yourusername: much to think about these days. like how the fuck this app works now?

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user1: first post in three years and it’s THIS?

user2: i am not complaining

user3: i am savouring every little piece in case she goes missing for another three years

mclarenf1: the queen has returned

user4: no thanks to you

user5: how about we keep my wife’s name out of your fucking mouth

user6: socials admin i know it is not you specifically but i really don’t know how you can post up here like you’re completely absolved of your involvement in this. your car had break failure that broke her fucking back - it is a miracle she is even still walking! and you still don’t accept any responsibility for it

user7: i love y/n but like how is it mclaren’s fault? break failure happens all the time?

user8: well it’s in one part the fact that they were using her as a test dummy because it was a new faulty part that mclaren was experimenting with that was on her car and NOT lando’s and the fact that to this day when they feel like it they’ll heap guilt onto mick schumacher

user9: without being disrespectful there were two formula one careers that were ended that day because mclaren have kept to the narrative that it was mick that put her into the barriers eventhough siedel admitted when he left mclaren that it was a faulty break part that caused it.

user10: clock it

user11: yes clock it but maybe on a different post because it’s y/n’s return to the internet and all yall can talk about is the most traumatic event in her life?

kimiantonelli: i also love clairo

user12: what is bro doing?

user13: be quiet he’s our best hope of y/n coming back to the paddock let him cook

user14: name three songs local

kimiantonelli: bags (live), alewife and blouse

user15: this motherfucker might just do it

maxverstappen1: i miss brando :/

yourusername: you know my address

yourusername: use it since you like to give it out so much

maxverstappen1: I DID NOT GIVE THEM YOUR ADDRESS

user16: y/lnstappen friendship is BACK

user17: it was never gone?

user18: but now we get to see it :P

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when she woke the next morning, y/n knew she had to read the letter again before jumping into anything. in her sleep she was plagued with memories of the past, but not the usual ones that haunted her in the dark. there were no flames, no hospitals, no career-ending injuries. no, this time she was transported back to 2020 and her first few races of her formula one career.

march 2020.

the paddock was much bigger in formula one than it had been in formula two with hundreds more people running around, barging through crowds, hitting y/n on the way through and not even stopping to apologise. she had thought briefly that she would be making more noise as the first female racer to take part in a race since forever - y/n even thought that she’d made a bit of a splash during preseason testing, nestled between her teammate lando and alex in the red bull in fifth.

but she was invisible. even with the garish orange path to follow to the mclaren garage, y/n struggled to get through the crowds of people brandishing their paddock passes. her trainer had gone ahead to set up her driver room which left y/n to push through and arrive to briefing ten minutes late.

“i’m so sorry, i got lost and by the time i was going in the right direction the paddock had filled up?”

y/n stammered, not quite able to make eye contact with zak brown. the american wasn’t tall in comparison to the general public but he towered over y/n and the disapproving stare didn’t do much to help.

“just make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

zak snipped, waving his hand in y/n’s direction, telling her to take a seat. y/n rushed to the nearest empty seat and looked for her teammate in the room. lando was sat just three seats to her right on a small table. y/n tried to make eye contact with lando but he avoided her gaze like it was burning him, so much for the ‘big brother’ act he had put on at the car launch.

the engineers stood in front of the screen and started their long-winded presentation about the prospects for the season ahead. y/n pulled her note book out and frantically started taking notes, she didn’t know if that was normal for formula one drivers, but knowing as much as possible couldn’t hurt.

y/n copied down the warnings about possible tyre wear in turn three when she heard some soft sniggers, like someone was trying to stifle their laughter. this drew y/n out of her focus on the presentation, looking around the meeting room to locate the perpetrator.

lando caught her eye immediately. he had a light blush across his face and his mouth was covered by his hand. he looked guilty, guiltier than the rest of the room who were listening intently to the engineers. y/n raised her eyebrow in question.

“i’m sorry are we distracting you two?”

zak interrupted the presentation, turning to look at y/n and lando.

“no, sorry sir,” y/n replied turning her chair back to face the screen. “lando?” zak pressed.

“i’m sorry zak but y/n was distracting me with her note-taking,” lando forced out between his boyish giggles. “i’ve never taken notes, i didn’t realise you would be sucking up to the engineers this early on?”

“i’ve always taken notes? is it a problem? i’m sorry if i was distracting you lando.”

“yeah we’ll see how much those notes help you on track, rookie.”

lando spat over the table. it was uncharacteristically mean for the lando she had seen in the mclaren social content and the lando she spoke with at the car launch. y/n felt tears prickle in her eyes but she swallowed them down, she couldn’t cry yet - or at least not in view of all the most important people on the team.

“right. we’ll get back to business then.”

the rest of the meeting went by in a blur for y/n, but despite the outburst from lando, she continued to take her notes, she would be damned if some comments from lando would fuck up her entire race weekend routine. y/n took her time when zak dismissed them from the meeting, not wanting to look unprofessional.

moving towards the door, y/n’s shoulder hit someone else’s. she looked up to make eye contact with lando yet again.

“you better not make a habit of making contact with me, rookie,” lando said, a slight smirk but a harsh look in his eyes.

“are you like okay?”

“why wouldn’t i be?” lando replied pushing past through the door.

“i don’t know, you’re just a little frosty this morning? did i do something?”

“why would i be thinking about you, seriously? this is my team, know your place and we’ll get on just fine”.

with that lando was gone and y/n was left puzzled. i guess PR really does work wonders, y/n thought before making her own way to her drivers room.

her trainer, luca, wasn’t there when she managed to locate the room but all of her gear was already neatly put away like they had discussed. y/n cracked open an electrolyte drink and opened her notebook to study the meeting points.

there was a loud knock at the door and before y/n could even utter a “come in”, the mystery visitor barged into the room. daniel ricciardo announced his arrival with a packet of tim tams thrown at y/n and a quick “howdy” before he started rifling through her stuff and studying her helmet.

“ah, another cool dude who has a cuddly guy on their helmet,” daniel said, picking up her helmet, pointing at the cartoon version of her childhood cat.

“oh that’s schumi, when we travelled for karting we always brought him up until he died of old age, but i still want him with me whenever i race.” y/n said, nervous that the heartfelt explanation would be deemed uncool by one of the coolest racers she had ever seen.

“oh that’s surprisingly cute, i bet schumi was a big hit in the paddock back in the day.”

“he sure was, he’s how i charmed max into not hating me after i took him out once,” y/n chuckled thinking back to the race where max stormed up to her with angry tears in his eyes until y/n practically threw schumi at him. in just five seconds, max had calmed down and schumi was happily purring in the young dutchman’s lap.

“that sounds like max. but speaking of the other young whippersnappers in the paddock, how is our lando treating you? i bet zak and that can’t keep up with you two…” daniel asked, slumping to the floor, taking one of her drinks from the mini fridge.

“oh. i am getting used to him, we’ll put it that way?”

“he’s not being rude is he?”

“no! well. he insists on calling me rookie and keeps making comments about me crashing into him and made fun of me taking notes in briefing but i’m sure that such the british banter.”

“you’re british?”

“well. um. yeah, you got me there.”

daniel grabbed her hands, forcing y/n to look him in the eyes rather than her very interesting shoes.

“i know lando is like some media darling, but so are you. don’t let him push you around, he may have been in this team a while but you’re just as good as him if not better. you’re here to prove yourself, not to play second fiddle, okay?”

it was the first time someone had actually tried to talk to her properly since getting to the paddock. again, tears climbed to her eyes, but this time she let one creep out. daniel wiped it away.

“we made the mistake of isolating max when he was young and new, we won’t make the same mistake - we can’t have two of you running rampant around here,” y/n let out a wet laugh which daniel returned, “just come to renault if you need anything from me. max will be there for you, you know, and seb, kimi, fernando and all the old men will listen to you. don’t rot in your drivers room or hotel suite and think you’re not wanted here.”

y/n nodded, feeling some butterflies in her stomach. she was actually here - a formula one driver. a seven-time race winner wants her here, world champions want her here. a private-school fuckboy wasn’t going to ruin her first ever race weeekend.

“thank you daniel.”

“i have to dash, but i’m serious, we’re here for you. and i would be honoured to kick that little shit’s ass for you, okay?”

the australian left in just as loud fashion as he came, but in the remaining silence, y/n finally felt some peace. this was her chance, and she wasn’t going to mess it up.

present.

y/n couldn’t let that happen to kimi. the young italian was just so unbelievably earnest in his letter that y/n couldn’t bear the thought of his kindness being taken advantage of. george russell had never been outwardly callous but with his attack on max late last season and his complete radio silence with y/n since her crash made her suspicious.

as she prepared to ask max for kimi’s number, sara (who did actually still have a job) sent her a link.

sara: zak brown believes mclaren has the strongest pairing on the grid with no more childish recklessness like in the early 2020s

sara: do you want us to put out a statement or ignore as usual?

y/n clicked on the link, even though she knew it would just annoy her to the point that her phone might become closely acquainted with the thames.

as the formula one world gears up for the 2025 season, zak brown has already stated his confidence for mclaren this season. the papaya team will be coming into the 2025 season as reigning constructors champions and lando norris and oscar piastri will be aiming to add the world drivers championship to that as well.

when zak brown sat down with us earlier this week, the mclaren ceo did not beat around the bush, stating that mclaren have the strongest pairing on the grid. with red bull promoting liam lawson in a test and, mercedes putting unproven kimi antonelli next to george russell and ferrari gambling with charles leclerc and lewis hamilton, brown might just be right.

in their journey to constructors champions, brown recognised that as a team they had straightened out all of their ‘growing pains’. this is exemplified in oscar piastri completing all laps in the 2024 season.

like they usually do, y/n y/ln’s particularly rabid twitter fans will probably detect some ‘shade’ towards the former driver. brown did touch on the prior mclaren drivers during his reign as ceo, saying that the team had some childish recklessness, but now they have a team that all know their place.

y/n y/ln hasn’t spoken about anything formula one related since her retirement, even forgoing the opportunity to congratulate the team that took the chance on her for winning the championship - something brown did not mince his words on off camera. brown lamented about y/ln’s silence, labelling her a brat and ungrateful for not still thanking him for allowing a woman to compete in formula one.

will mclaren make it back-to-back constructors championships? and will they sweep both championships this season?

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she needed that loud-mouthed american’s head on a silver platter. the letter had almost sucked her back into the world of formula one, only for the man who discarded her like a broken toy when his car had malfunctioned and smashed her and her career into a concrete wall to call her an ungrateful brat.

fuck him. fuck mclaren. and fuck that dumbass reporter for giving him the time of day.

y/n didn’t throw her phone from her balcony but pulled up her texts with max.

texts between y/n y/ln (bold) and max verstappen (italic)

have you read this absolute hogwash

zak brown believes mclaren has the strongest pairing on the grid with no more childish recklessness like in the early 2020s

i 100% get why you wanted to put him in a wall last season

you watched last season?

shut up not the time

did you text me just to call your old tyrannical boss a fraud?

i was going to ask for kimi’s number but now i’m back at square one

noooooooo

i want to be there for him, the way no one was for us.

but this is the bs they write about me when i haven’t been seen or heard from in three years, imagine the shite they come up with when i’m the paddock every weekend

WHEN?

no no no

i’ll give you kimi’s number

contact: kimi antonelli (mercedes)

you decide what you want to do

as much as i would kill to have you around the paddock again… even in the vicinity of george

i want you to do what you are comfortable with

thanks max

i’m not giving you a yes but i’m definitely thinking about it

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fin.

note: omg that's part one??????? i had this idea and have been planning and adding to it for a couple days. no spoilers but there will be multiple love interests, backstabbing and all that lovely stuff - i just love the drama !!! (yes i will finish guilty as sin at some point as well). i hope you enjoy the prose as well - first time writing that way on here lol ?! let me know if you liked it, who you'd like to see her with and what you'd like to see happen!

[annabelle--cane]

I got into tma in 2022 on a road trip with no internet and then only tangentially interacted with the fandom (light hcs, fanart) and I am. so compelled to understand what the fandom was like in 2020. what were the takes. why was it so awful. does it explain why every time I try to look into protocol I get a rancid Vibe and jump back 5 feet.

to preface: on scale, it really wasn't any worse than your average fandom, it just A) got Very popular over a short period and B) that period was during a time of particularly high stress where many people suddenly could only experience a social life online. tma is also a fairly political and progressive work, which inevitably leads to certain kinds of Takes. it also got Very popular right at the point where the episodes were reaching their peak of explicit social commentary and sustained morbid tone, which, especially combined with point B from above, drew out some really visceral reactions from a lot of people. nothing was actually inherently rancid about 2020-2021 tma fandom, there was just a bit of a perfect storm of factors.

having said that. some common discourse themes:

the perennial shipping discourse. georgie is the only one of our leads to have never killed a person, but really, I pinky promise that your ship between two unrepentant serial killers is 100x more problematic than my ship between two unrepentant serial killers.

asexuality: how dangerous is it? on a scale of 1-5, with 1 being "mostly" to 5 being "completely," how humiliating is it to be asexual? what is the singular true asexual experience that is unproblematic to write about?

wow, jonny was so out of line for writing this episode, what gives him the right to--oh he said it's directly based on personal experiences? so sorry, my bad, I'll learn for next time. wow, jonny was so out of line for writing this epi--

I did not like this episode. this is obviously a direct act of violence against me. why would an episode be Not Good when there is, in the world, Sadness?

hello, I have sorted all of the characters into a simple chart that clearly delineates which of them are completely irredeemable monsters with no interiority or motives and which of them are perfect angel victims who have only ever been nice and never hurt anyone, ever (and if they did hurt someone then that person deserved it). if I see you adding nuance to any of my rulings, I will kill you. this also extends to the podcast writers. #ilovebinaries.

the characters... are queer... and maybe even other marginalized identities as well... and yet, they do bad things? there's not even a single completely morally innocent character? by god, did they not think about the implications this might have!

web!martin. lol people are so stupid for thinking that the theory is at all plausible, media comprehension much? that would lichrally imply that a queer, poor, mentally ill character might be capable of badness. what do you mean we are currently listening to an arc where he's an accomplice to serial murder.

[d-criss-news]

kennyctran: Happy (belated) Broadway opening to Maybe Happy Ending!

I was lucky enough in 2020 to be an actor in Maybe Happy Ending’s NA premiere at the @alliancetheatre, and now I’m lucky in 2024 to be a part of Maybe Happy Ending’s Broadway premiere in a completely different way, as an investor.

This show is so incredibly special. In Atlanta I felt how much audiences loved our show. I’m so happy that on Broadway, I’m seeing that love 100x. Go see why everyone is talking about it (and why it changed my life) 🙂!

I won’t dump on here how much this show means to me and some of the great people brought into my life through this show… i guess iykyk. Last slide for how I would take blocking notes back then 🥲

[dr-spectre]

How do you get such good idol pics???? I can never get mine to look nice,, it's so hard for me to get deep cut photos when they're performing anarchy rainbow

Fun fact, if you wanna take photos of Deep Cut when they are performing Anarchy Rainbow, all you have to do is win one game when you reach ruler, and you'll be able to board their float. It used to be that you had to win a 100x or 333x battle to get up there, but thankfully after the grand fest they changed it! So keep that in mind for when you wanna take pics during FrostyFest and beyond!!

Now how to take good photos? Well, I'll give you some tips.

1. Make sure you have your subject (in this case, an idol) in the frame. Either in the middle or 1/3 to the left or 1/3 to the right.

2. WATCH THE PERFORMANCES FIRST!!! Watch them and look out for poses and different moves that they do to take good photos! If you see a cool pose or action, remember it and get ready to spot it when you're taking pics.

3. Use the zoom in feature and tilt the camera to add more spice. If you want good close ups, move your camera forward and them use the zoom in feature. But don't go too close or too far. If you want a shoulder up shot, make sure you capture the subject's full head and shoulders in the frame. Do NOT cut anything out.

Notice how this shot looks a bit wonky? It's because Callie's head gear is clipped out and it isn't centered well.

4. It's trial and error. Basically, when it comes to virtual photography, it takes time and paying attention to your own work to get better shots. It doesn't happen overnight, and it's gonna take a while. But what matters is that you are having fun!!! Fun and experimenting are the keys to improvement!!! Also, look at other people's shots and think about what you like about the shots and what you can take from theirs and add to your own, without, of course, just directly coping their work.

If you want some inspiration... here's the first photo I took in a game with a photo mode back in 2020.

Now, here's a more recent one in 2024 from Marvel’s Spider-Man 2 that I was really proud of!

At the end of the day, fun is the most important thing. Okay? Don't worry about if shit looks good or not. Just follow your heart. Follow your gut feeling. And it'll work out in the end.

[odinsblog]

Do not read this if you don’t want to hear straight talk.

Let’s get this straight up front: I am NOT a fan of Joe Biden. I don’t believe that he’s “the greatest most progressive president since FDR,” and I do not buy any of the other hype that DNC sycophants are selling. Biden has a lot of problems. On the border; and on immigration for Haitians and other non-white non-European immigrants; he fundamentally changed (for the worse) how and where asylum seekers can apply; he is absolutely positively deadass wrong on Israel, and he has even more issues than I’m willing to go into on this “short” post. A lot more.

That all said, I fucking hate Donald Trump and I do not want to see him in office again. Anything you can say about Biden you can say 100x worse about Trump. Everything gets worse with Trump. Everything.

If Democrats wanted another candidate, the 2020 primaries was the time for doing it. So now, less than four months before the election, we stick with the person who the DNC crammed down our throats when we very obviously had other viable options. It’s not only too late for changing horses midstream, but it’s just plain old stupid. Like the video said, what’s the fucking plan?

In contrast, look at how united Republicans are:

And all of those white nationalist, Christofascists are not only strongly united, they are all voting for Trump.

Meanwhile, Democrats are l i t e r a l l y out there using Trump’s biggest argument against Biden and arguing for a replacement as we approach the finish line. There is a reason the primaries are held so long before the general election - to give the public time to unite behind the candidate. Who is the public supposed to unite behind in less than 100 days? Because the Democrats can’t even agree on that all-important issue. Many DNC insiders don’t seem too keen on nominating a Black woman named Kamala Harris (and I’ve got issues with her too), but if not her, then who???

(SN: no, this isn’t the part where your favorite third or fourth party candidate with zero name recognition shows up and saves the day)

Not to mention, there’s a long ass list of legal challenges over who gets Biden’s war chest if he drops out now. Those challenges will not be resolved in 100 days.

So yeah, as far as I’m concerned the DNC didn’t listen to their base and stuck us with a clunker in 2020, and now they wanna get a new car? NO! What the hell happened to “be pragmatic”? What happened to “better than Trump”??

Look, I’ll wrap this up. I don’t like Biden very much. He IS too old and everyone knew he was too old in 2020, but right now, at this particular moment in time in this timeline, he’s what we got to beat Trump. And if Biden’s doctor pronounced him braindead and gave him five months to live, I’m exactly just petty enough to still vote for him anyway. My only motivation is to stop Trump, and if Biden is the last worst option for doing that, then so be it.

Finally, please try not to reblog this by adding, “Vote Blue”. That’s the annoyingly vapid rhetorical equivalent of saying, “shall not be infringed,” and it isn’t even an argument, it’s a slogan specifically tailored for people in your echo chamber who already agree with you — not something you would say if you wanted to convince people or to change their minds.

JFC, I can’t believe y’all really got me outchea actively advocating for Joe Biden.

[sillyname30]

kennyctran: Happy (belated) Broadway opening to Maybe Happy Ending! I was lucky enough in 2020 to be an actor in Maybe Happy Ending’s NA premiere at the @alliancetheatre, and now I’m lucky in 2024 to be a part of Maybe Happy Ending’s Broadway premiere in a completely different way, as an investor. This show is so incredibly special. In Atlanta I felt how much audiences loved our show. I’m so happy that on Broadway, I’m seeing that love 100x. Go see why everyone is talking about it (and why it changed my life) 🙂! I won’t dump on here how much this show means to me and some of the great people brought into my life through this show… i guess iykyk. Last slide for how I would take blocking notes back then 🥲

[theforest-system]

Bruhs it's time I finally talk about this

There was this thing in the 90s-2010s called "the false memory foundation" that formed bc some dude (not a psychologist/ANY MENTAL HEALTH BACKGROUND) SAd his daughter and his daughter started talking about it to family members and friends. That foundation was basically saying "if you have memories of childhood SA that's probably false memories."

And" Have you been to a therapist? Yeah? They manipulated you to have those." Or "have you been to a therapist? No? Then you must've got false memories somehow. Strange."

They claimed DID, the disorder she was diagnosed with, was fake and made up. That it was instead, false memory syndrome.

So yeah it disbanded in december 2019. So if you ever wondered why the DID community got so big (besides Anthony Padilla) in 2020, that's why.

Everyone can shut up saying it's a trend now, it never was (endos dni) it just was discriminated against and an entire community of abuse survivors got gaslit.

But you also shouldnt hate on endos. They're just... really ignorant on how you shouldn't want to make believe a disorder. Or if their tupla, that's a bit worse, bc they're wanting to play make believe AND using an entire religions practice in vain. But that being said,, I just want em to find a different community. They're just kids. Let him have some fun ig. This disorder can be fun. Sometimes. If I'm high. Lol. But They're mainly kids yall playing pretend LMAO (truly no hate).

But do I think they're doing it bc they think they'll "look cool"??? No, no one wants to be discriminated against. We DO fight ablism and the endos probably do too despite them not actually being multiple. They're just lonely kids, having friends in your head is a lot easier to cope than having no one :(.

Totally get why they do it, if I didn't have my DID I'd be dead 100x over by now. Sometimes bc of loneliness, which is why a lot of them want to have DID.

The problem never started with endos is what I'm saying.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Adam Zyglis

* * *

General observations about the campaign

The disinformation efforts are in high gear and are compounded by difficult-to-interpret early voting numbers. Others have written extensively about how to interpret early voting (Simon Rosenberg and Jay Kuo). My overly simplistic interpretation is that we are seeing the natural phenomenon of regression to the mean in early voting as the distortions in early voting caused by the Covid lockdown in 2020 are no longer present. That makes percentage comparisons and trends between 2020 and 2024 misleading.

In general, the core data conforms to what the political moment suggests should happen: Democrats are seeing strong(er) results based on the overriding issue of the 2024 election: The abrogation of the right of reproductive liberty in Dobbs that demoted more than half of America’s population to second class citizens. (See Jay Kuo’s article, linked above).

Democrats overperformed expectations in nearly every election since Dobbs. But pollsters and pundits keep trying to model 2024 based on 2020 and 2016. Not only do those elections lack the post-Dobbs effect, neither of them involved a candidate who mounted a coup and incited an insurrection, was convicted of 34 felonies, withheld national defense documents after a demand for their return, and was found to be civilly liable for sexual assault.

None of the above is meant to dismiss the consistent signal in the polls that the election will be close. But the relative advantage generated by enthusiasm and momentum cannot be ignored—as most pollsters seem to do.

In an incredible gift to the Harris campaign, Trump's surrogates have been saying the ugly part out loud:

Speaker Mike Johnson admitted that Republicans still want to repeal Obamacare a.k.a. the Affordable Care Act. See Vox, Republicans are serious about cutting people’s health care

RFK Jr. speaks openly about managing multiple cabinet-level agencies and sub-agencies across the federal landscape. What could go wrong with a guy who dumped a dead bear-cub in Central Park, used a chain saw to decapitate a dead whale, and contributed to a deadly measles outbreak in Samoa? (How RFK Jr. Falsely Denied His Connection to a Deadly Measles Outbreak in Samoa – Mother Jones).  

The Trump-Vance transition chair, Howard Lutnick, (CEO of Cantor Fitzgerald), repeatedly questioned the effectiveness of vaccines in an interview with Caitlin Collins on CNN. Video: Kaitlan Collins spars with Trump-Vance transition co-chair about RFK Jr. and vaccines | CNN Politics.

And of course, Trump chose five days before Election Day to tell women that he is going to exert control over them “whether the women like it or not:

I want to protect the women of our country. I want to protect the women [even though my advisors said it was] very inappropriate for you to say. "I said, 'Well, I'm going to do it, whether the women like it or not . . .

See Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Harris rips Trump for saying he'll protect women whether they 'like it or not'.

And on Thursday evening, Trump said in an interview with Tucker Carlson that Liz Cheney should have “guns trained on her” to see how she feels. He said:

“Let's put her with a rifle standing there with 9 barrels shooting at her. Let's see how she feels about it. You know, when the guns are trained on her face."

The media should write about nothing else for the next five days. Trump is implying an execution of a political opponent. On Thursday, the Times and WaPo devoted front-page coverage to a non-story about Joe Biden condemning the comedian who called Puerto Rico a “floating island of garbage.” In comparison, Trump’s comments deserve 100X as much coverage—and condemnation.

The above missteps are damaging before we even get to the slurs and threats to wide swaths of Americans: Puerto Ricans, Black voters, Jewish voters, and anyone who opposes Trump's political agenda.

And Trump's effort to hold a press conference from a garbage truck was a public relations disaster because (a) Trump reminded everyone of the “floating island of garbage” comment, and (b) Trump visibly struggled to open the truck door and appeared to stumble due to lack of balance issues.

As always, we cannot rely on Republicans to defeat themselves, even though they are doing their best to do so. Indeed, it is unavoidable because the Republican platform (to the extent it exists) seeks to advantage millionaires and billionaires at the expense of everyone else. It is tough to build a winning message on that platform. Grievance and division will take you only so far. After that, you must appeal to people who want a president who will improve their lives. That isn’t Trump. It is Kamala Harris.

Trump has helped to crystalize the candidates' differences in the campaign's final weeks. That can only help Democrats up and down the ballot. As the saying goes, “Sometimes it is better to be lucky than good.” Fortunately, Kamala Harris is both!

[Robert Hubbell Newsletter]

[tccconfessions2hear]

my grandmother recently died and i feel nothing.

now, mind you, my grandmother lived nearby. like, it would take my mom 10 minutes drive me from her house and to my grandmas. in the mornings for my 1st-3rd grade years, my grandma would take me to school. from the 4th to 7th grade, she'd pick me up from school. because my mom and dad divorced when i was in the 6th grade, and my dad is a felon, he has been living at my grandmothers house (his mom), so i would constantly go back from my moms house and my grandmas/dads house. i have spent a lot of time with her. especially when i got into vintage things, since she was born in 1943. (sadly, she quickly became a housewife so- no, she was not doing cool hippie things or listening to awesome music, she was living in the american sector of Berlin with her husband and at the end of the decade had her first child, but i was still curious.)

also, about 2 years ago, my mom lost custody of me so ive been living full time at my grandmothers. and in 2020 i lived there full time. (my mom is a nurse). and a short period from 2021-2022 i lived there.

she would also take a lot of care for me. she did my laundry, made my food, and all around just take care of me.

so, it seems that i mustve grown a bond with my grandmother? i know quite a bit about her? ive spent a lot of time with her?

well, ive forgotten to mention that over the years it has been drilled into my head from my father that she is babying me and that is actively crippling me, which was absolutely true.

she is part of the reason i have an eating disorder, that other part going to my mother. (i only eat a few foods, including bacon, and literally gag and break down if i have to eat anything else. i will not eat pizza or mac and cheese or any sort of pasta, ive been forced to eat those and I gagged and cried. she only made me bacon. this might not seem like a big deal but i am not getting the proper nutrition that a teenaged 83-pounds, and yes, thats 83, should be getting. my dad and stepmom think im malnourished, and i agree.)

now, i only just thought ot this, but she may possibly be part of the reason why im so anxious and weird. i was that anon talking about picking my butt and shit. those habits werent discouraged. want to know what was?

"oh dont climb on that"

"oh dont ride that bike, you could get hurt."

"dont watch bobs burgers, that show is nasty. family guy is fine though."

(i know i was 9, but which seemingly average child doesnt want to appear as if they were older and cooler? also family guy is 100x more graphic than bobs burgers. im hoping she just got the two confused?)

so, up until, id say, the end of my freshman year of high school, i was pretty fucking weird. even now i still am, i wrote a fucking monkees cannibalization fan fiction and have an interest with adam lanza (nothing to do with my grandmother, just some weird shit im into still).

but before that, until the summer of 2023, i was super socially unaware. i was creepy and weird and my grandmother never discouraged this except the bullies from school.

also, overall, she was a pain in the ass. the worst she ever got was BARELY A YEAR AGO, when me and my sister found out that when she does our laundry, she does not seperate our underwear, and mind you, i have been on my period and my sister at the time had not, and i had felt embarrassed, grossed out, and like i was a small child. why this happened? she didnt want me and my sister to do our own laundry because she just had to micromanage everything.

and i can barely think of any good times. we never had anything in common to bond us besides older and vintage stuff.

she never liked the beatles or the monkees though. she liked paul anka. sure she let me have her records, but the one i was most excited about was a disco duck dance party (which was mostly for the joke.)

and she never tried to pass down any of her hobbies, like sewing or cooking, or purposely tried to show me her music. yeah she gave me her records, but thats all. i went through her collection silently and alone taking out any recognizeable names.

she took me out clothes shopping a lot but they ended up more infuriating because she never wanted to go to stores i wanted to go to and when i did find something, she would turn it down if it wasnt up to her standards.

now i know i probably sound like a whiney spoiled brat, but this is just how i genuinely feel. even with all the sympathy coming in. even with all the support from friends, family, and my therapist. even when i was standing right in front of my grandmother when she was slowly dying and later actually dead, i still felt nothing besides sympathy to the people who are greiving.

im sorry thid isnt a tcc thing, you dont have to post this, you can even delete this, i just needed to get my full thoughts to someone because i told one of my friends part of how i felt and he went all "ohh im so edgy eric harris haha" and im too scared to tell my therapist anything on how im genuinely feeling. from all of this to how i dont even see a point in living. (this is before my grandmother. i just dont see a point in me living when ill die anyway, all pathetic and alone too, so ill do it when im younger, at most 27. and unfortunately the only time i do agree with adam lanza is that "living is suffering" shit.)

again im so sorry if i sound like a brat or an edgelord. this is just how i feel.

CONFESSION 407

[thebusytypewriter]

Sooooo if I were to begin planning for a mid-December event where I allowed you to pick a character or pairing along with a number corresponding to one of my music playlists, which playlist would you be most interested in?

[superkalafragilisticiexpectitall]

in 1921, over a million people died in Eurasia heat wave, drought & resulting famine,

(100x *total* annual death in 2020s)

New York Herald: “Deaths for Millions in 1921’s Record Heat Wave”

Its cyclical, its nothing new.

Its a climate scam..

[riacte]

Vote False!! like please please pretty please

1. Have you ever seen her skins. Even outside of the tumblr sexymen context she has one of the Best Selection of Minecraft Skins. Like:

Like first of all there’s her saturated post-Demise skin. Look me in the eye and tell me that’s not 2013 DevianArt tumblr anime overly colourful OC core. The neon green hair. The fabulously unnecessary pink lip gloss. The jarringly violet jacket. The Ebony Darkness vampiric red boots. The overly saturated Windows XP blue goggles. She looks like a 2013 tumblrina. In fact she probably is a 2013 tumblrina.

And of course there’s her wearing the Mumbo suit and I mean just. Just look at her. I don’t need to say anything, right? Put her in a girlboss suit. That’s a tumblr sexyman.

And then of course we have [holds back sapphic screaming] her latest skins. Listen e!False’s skin did something to everyone. Don’t lie. The steampunk. The suspenders. The rolled sleeves. And of course she’s being a mildly evil pathetic murderous meow meow. And the logging outfit is here just for display because like. Just look at it. The belt. It’s red fucking flannel. And brown gloves. She’s serving. Are we all okay? Let’s take deep breaths shall we—

There’s more about False in a suit. She was the butler in Mint Maids. And she was a cute skeleton. And she had a froggy hat. AND SHE WAS SHREK. Look at her range!

And speaking of rolled up sleeves, you had to be there when she rolled them up for the first time at the beginning of a HC season and let me tell you, hermitblr panicked. Everyone was 😳. Like how can you not—

2. Enough about the skins. False has a reputation for being a scary PvPer, and it’s both right and wrong. Right as in she can be scary sometimes but in a random, cryptic way. Remember when Scar had to kill her but just couldn’t because False was wearing protection armour? And Scar sounded like he was about to cry while False looked like a pincushion with all the arrows sticking out of her? And False took mercy on Scar and stood still just so he could kill her? There’s being scary, and then there’s the supernatural type of scary imposed by her. She’s insane. And then she felt bad and politely allowed Scar to kill her. Ma’am that’s supernatural.

But on the flip side, False can actually be kinda scared herself when it comes to PvP. You can see from her streams lmfao. But the point is, while she’s panicking and hiding and running away while being 100x prepared with like a stack of potions and golden apples, her opponent is terrified of her. So we have False being a sneaky confused pathetic meow meow (her POV) while from an outsider POV she seems like a mysterious, murderous… entity.

3. Okay apparently one of the criteria of tumblr sexyman is about the fandom’s perception soooo even before e!False, the fandom has always been OBSESSED with the concept of another False. A False False. TrueSymmetry if you will. A devious, cunning mirror image. One of the OG Helsmits. The fandom’s imagination went insane.

4. False does crime. She’s sneaky. She steals. Her (in)famous quote: It’s not stealing if you’re not caught.” Remember her hero complex during the HC7 Mayoral Race when she purposefully lured in mobs just to kill them off? Slay. What a queen.

5. Look at her cultural relevance!!! We still call her Queen of Hearts from a Gucci Gang parody years ago! She’s still False Supremacy even though that began from September 2020 with her MCC9 and MCC10 wins, by the way you should watch MCC9 Blue Bats if you haven’t already— [I am forcefully removed from the podium] She’s a legend!! She won Twitch Rivals in person!! Is that sexyman of her? No but you should still vote for her!!!

6. She already lost the mayoral vote in HC7 this is the least we can do for her 👉👈

7. It would be funny for her to beat DocM77. Like imagine the Doc reaction on Twitter. Don’t tell Doc. Get slayed. Also women <3

8. Cub got kicked out early and since he shares similar vibes with False she should win this round for both of them <3 dry humour slay murder girlboss hermits <3 <3 I have no idea what I’m saying

9. If she wins this round she would face off Ren like that would be funny. I mean it’ll also be funny if Doc wins. Ignore that point—

10. I am once again asking for your vote. Queen of Hearts! ShrekSymmetry!! #FALSESWEEP LET’S GO!!!

[figula]

last night i was thinking how the NHS treated me whenever i was dim enough to ask for help for my madness + just getting like more and more angry remembering it lmfao

i actually think that severing myself from like the idea of "help" and "psychiatry" and "CBT" and "mental health" has been more beneficial to my QOL than literally anything the NHS ever did for me, so im at peace w/ it on the whole, however there were some real highlights:

me sitting sobbing my eyes out in a small room w/ two strangers begging them to Please Help, and receiving a letter a few weeks later saying i wasn't ill enough for any help + i was on my own

being diagnosed w/ BPD (a big regret i have - once i cann afford to spend £250 on a psych visit im going to try and get that scrubbed off my record bc at the time of diagnosis like ~8 years ago i was naive enough to think that a diagnosis that wasn't depression or anxiety would force the NHS into giving me "help". however, obviously, as you all know, a BPD diagnosis is the 2020s equivalent of Female Hysteria

i was offered a round of CBT (classic) but there was an 18m waiting list and in that 18m i was diagnosed w/ the BPD. so i had a conversation w/ them in which they were like "we can only do the anxiety/depression, if you talk about anything BPD-ish we'll terminate you"

went to the minor injuries unit after a particularly bad self-harm session + was not asked any questions about how i was doing mentally, they didnt check i was safe, they didnt ask me if i was gonna be ok at home lol, they just cleaned me / bandaged me / sent me home again (tbh idk what id rather they did tbh like. i dont want to be sectioned - i was just kind of astonished by the lack of pretence at caring how i was doing)

in the last-ditch effort i made to get some "help" i told my (beloved! none of this is his fault) GP that if he had anything going i'd be willing to give it a shot. he told me there was this local unit opening up for "personality disorders" and that given i was motivated + all that shit i would be a perfect fit for it. (at this time i was already leery of the BPD label but i was still thinking like: maybe it will actually open THIS door to "treatment") i said to him: i know for a fact they will not accept me. you're welcome to try, but i am 100% sure that they will find a reason to reject me as a patient. and he was like no no no! haha why wouldn't they :) i'll send them a personal email about you! and they'll take you on my reccommendation! and i was like lol ok roy. anyway yeah of course they didnt accept me - as i told him they wouldnt - and he was so shocked and upset during that conversation where he told me this - and i was just like totally unemotional like "i told you this would happen" and he was like just so shocked about it all (honestly idk why, as a doctor, he must see the carnage, but whatever) and just like "my god - you were right" (yeah no shit roy) and yeah that was just the moment i was like alright im never doing any of this shit again, never ever.

to be honest my suggestion to anyone in a similar situation is to read up on antipsychiatry lmfao (shout out to bananapeppers for forcing it into my eyeballs via tumblr) bc it really changed my mindset for the better. that's probably quite a bleak sentiment to end a post about psychiatry on but uh. i dont know what to say otherwise. i don't believe in "mental healthcare" anymore like i rly dont. im doing 100x better now that i refuse to talk to doctors about my madness. there is no moral to this post

ETA: from @bananapeppers herself: "for anyone reading this who may be interested, this is an England-based antipsychiatry organization that I recommend: Campaign for Psychiatric Abolition ( https://linktr.ee/cpabolition)"

[blackgumball]

im watching this teen show from 2020 called panic. here's my thing. i feel like angsty teen television needs to take itself 100x less seriously for it to work well. like theyre presenting it as this drama. which is dumb to me. one thing i think was very successful about teen wolf is that it knew it was ridiculous, which ironically enough made the dramatics hit harder

[thesplatterman]

statistics as a splatoon 3 player:

salmon run:

gets at least eggs vp 300 on all maps and knows each map from the back of my hand

spams "this way" and "booyah" the most to lead the team

scores 100+ eggs on a normal day, 150+ on a good day

second to last to use specials but when used is when we win

(used to) show off my golden big run badge with pride

probably the only game mode i play

hero mode:

100% completed all of the upgrade chart and 100% completed restoring all the islands

completed every level with all weapons offered along with maining hero shot in turf war

has not attempted the secret level because the risk is greater than the reward

had to complete the ending twice because the internet bugged out

speedruns every level but hasn't touched hero mode since last year

was one of those kids who pushed smallfry into the water

side order:

has completed most of the color chip collection (damn you, splatling barrage)

can complete most levels under 10 or 30 seconds (not bosses nor splat zones)

has completed the low hacks run and (used to display) the badge proudly

completes most runs around 20 minutes

completed all of the jelleton guide and marina's journal

maxed out all hacks, bought everything from cipher, and has 9999 prlz

turf war:

least played mode but usually gets mvp or second to mvp in matches

ranks out with at least 49-60% win against others

holds back reefslider but spams ink mines

rushes into the field after inking home and usually gets splatted first

usually gets 12:1 splat to splatted ratio, once had 20:0 splat to splatted ratio with 4 reefsliders

number one target, jump spot, and splatter in most cases unless its one of those bad days

anarchy battles:

never played once, never has played since 2020 in splat2

only has old knowledge from splatoon 1-2

favorite used to be rainmaker, now its none

still doesn't understand clam blitz

still a c+ rank since yesteryear

still hates the tower control

splatfests:

never plays anymore, never will play unless forced. thinks its rigged (it is)

only dragged in to play when s/o or best friend begs me to hop on

"what the hell are fizz bombs??", proceeds to treat them like booyah bombs

has a 2/3rd chance losing rounds because of unfair weapon pairing

never won a splatfest besides vanilla and sweet, wouldve won water if s/o didnt force me to become grass

never wins 10x, 100x, or 333x battles, only in it for the conch gambling

summary: i suck when its pvp.