#...advice can be helpful of course

[klarion-the-witch-boy]

Me: sees writing advice

Writing advice: DO this. DON'T DO that.

Me:

Me: Imma do the opposite? How about that? Fucking Fight me.

[deathsmallcaps]

I need advice.

I’m a white intern working in a mostly white southern(ish) high school. Students of Color number at under 2%, perhaps even lower. It’s a very white, rural community - I grew up in a fairly mixed, suburban northern community, and part of my family is Black.

Several of my white students say rude things to my Students of Color. I’ve told them to knock it off *as appropriately as I can* but I’m probably one of the few adults that actively discourage that behavior.

I don’t want to let this shit fly under the radar, but I also know that if an adult of authority *who will only be here for a couple more weeks* interferes, and then doesn’t stick around, it could make things worse. Additionally, I know these kids are probably very very very used to this ‘system’ and that making a short-term change could be more harmful than helpful.

I asked one of my senior students after a very racist incident *where she was laughing along with the perpetrator but I told him to stop anyway* that I can move him, or her, so she could be more comfortable (admin either does nothing or slaps wrists, especially for seniors). She said it was fine and that he was always like that.

I must emphasize, I think they were bantering (they talk so much I think they consider each other friends?), but it was also wayyy fucking out of line, especially in a school setting. And the guy says so much out of line shit I’m surprised he isn’t rocking a full set of dentures to replace the teeth he ought to have lost by now.

Another student took me up on my offer to move people, but I ended up moving him, which sucks because he was the victim in this situation. Unfortunately, I have to keep his aggressors in their spots, as they are highly rowdy in all the ways and require a lot more supervision than he did. And the class is really full. These were also all freshmen, so I wouldn’t be surprised if that affected the victim’s reaction.

So I’d really appreciate advice as to whether I should let it be, or continue as is, or step it up even more, from People of Color in largely white, especially rural, communities. Like any advice from current or previous educators, especially Educators of Color would be appreciated, but specifically southern/rural ones would be wonderful. I’m going to talk to my family members about it, but they’ve lived in more Northern settings their entire lives and they may have less … applicable (?) experience to the situation.

Again, I’m an intern, I’m going to only be there until winter break 2024, and I don’t want to fuck things up for these kids in the long run with my northern ally ‘sensibilities’. Thank you!

[m1d-45]

i gobbled and devoured the post imposter things. scrumptious!! but what if poor little xiao man feels guilty for hunting or scarring us in the hunt? and please don’t feel obligated to answer, i know you’re busy

burden to bear

word count: 2.7k

-> warnings: spoilers for liyue archon quest, canon typical violence…. minor body horror? blood mention.

-> gn reader (you/yours)

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yum1x || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay

< masterlist >

during the hunt itself, xiao is driven by a need to prove himself, pushing past his instinct and the way his karma flares around the one on the throne. he sees it as a way to redeem himself, to finally scrape some of the sin off his hands. it’s a way to prove himself, and one he takes eagerly.

it’s not correct to say he’s blinded by faith, but it’s not exactly wrong either. he definitely feels, subconsciously, that something’s… off, maybe, about his god. perhaps it’s the way his vision always seems to flutter and flare, or the ice in his veins when the command to hunt is given. he feels uneasy, unsettled, finding himself rolling his shoulders and wondering if he needed to add more stretches into his routines. and yet, despite the tension in his shoulders and the twist in his stomach, he kneels, bowing his head with a swear of fealty that goes unanswered.

unacknowledged.

perhaps he had delivered it wrong?

he doesn’t think much of it, quickly dissolving from the throne room and appearing besides the statue of the seven on the west edge of liyue. looking out over jueyun karst, he knows it’s a bit fruitless to start his search there due to the vicinity to the other adepti, but the spires there are tall, filled with wiry bushes and crags of rock that are easier to hide in than may seem at first glance.

he draws his pole arm, spinning it once over his hand before tapping the end to the stone beneath him. he’s not sure why he’s so nervous—is it the fact that this is technically the first order he’s been given? is it the idea of slaughtering somebody so identical to his creator that it nearly fooled morax, who’s been alive longer than he could fathom?

or is it simply the prospect of failure?

xiao grits his teeth and steps off the edge of the floating stone, halting his fall with anemo at nearly the last possible moment.

his feelings meant nothing. orders were given, and he had to follow them.

why else was he there, if he couldn’t?

it takes him longer than he expected to find you. he’s almost impressed, really, that you managed to evade his searching eyes, that you dodged not only him but the other adepti as well, all without taking refuge in any villages or otherwise civilized areas due to the orders the millelith put out. you hid well, he could attest to that, and though he was the one to find you, it was only on accident.

he was clearing out a group of hilichurls north of the inn. he was surprised so many had settled so close to the statue of the seven, as hilichurls usually avoided concentrated elemental energy, but didn’t think too hard about it. he simply unhooked his mask from his belt, noticing the difference in strength between these hilichurls and the average, and teleported into the middle of the camp.

the first thing he heard was a spotter’s cry. the second was the mitachurls’—archons, there were three—roar as they hefted their weapons. the final one was the intricate chanting of the abyss, but not any incantation he recognized.

he kept himself half in smoke as he danced around the edge of the camp, taking out the archers while he tried to find the abyss mage. he could catch glimpses of hydro bubbles through the walls of the hut, but the steps were covered in frost-

he barely ducked under the swing of a mitachurl’s axe, slashing his spear along its side as he slipped away, darting across the path of one charging with a large stone shield. it clipped his shoulder despite his efforts, pain spiking down his arm, but he didn’t pay attention to the injurh. normally he wouldn’t be this distracted, but two abyss mages and three mitachurls in one camp could only spell bad news. the best he could likely do was to leave and grab back-up, but who? the millelith were busy, morax and the adepti were on their own search…

xiao quickly climbed onto the roof of the hut, jamming his spear between two of the logs to keep grip on the woven roofing. the grass was damp, squishing uber this feet, likely from whatever hydro magic the mage was busy with within it. it likely wasn’t the smartest idea to stand on the roof, but this area of liyue was mostly plains, with little cover from the charging mitachurls. he needed a moment, if only a short one, to hash out a plan to deal with the camp.

the three mitachurls were standing besides the hut, two with shields and one with a crackling axe, electro dancing along the blade. xiao shifted, pivoting around the peak of the hut to move away from that one, the grass roof squishing below his feet.

the mitachurl’s ear twitched.

he shoved himself off the roof just as the mitachurl slammed the flat of its blade onto the roof, the whole shack shaking. electricity swarmed across the waterlogged roofing, reaching the opposite edge just as xiao dropped off it, landing between the other two mitachurls. they didn’t charge, nor attack, their motivations only made clear when the hiss of cryo froze out the lingering moisture in the air in front of him, effectively boxing him in.

the abyss mage swayed in its circle, staff glowing a sharp blue from within its bubble of frost.

“leave, adeptus,” it hissed, waving its staff in a circle. “you have no place here.”

xiao didn’t reply, instead picking apart his options. he couldn’t do significant damage to the shield mitachurls without utilizing his burst to destroy their shields, but that didn’t cover the mage at all… and he was still wet from the roof, so the mage would be able to freeze him within the time he had drawn in enough anemo energy to wield his mask with any level of efficiency…

he flexed his hand around his polearm. how had he gotten into this situation? his only options were to get lucky or teleport away, but even the latter of those relied on the first.

luck. how useless was he, to rely on luck-?

“‘adeptus’?”

the abyss mage startled at the voice, the cryo it had been swirling dissipating. both he and it turned to the side, to the entrance to the hut, where a figure could be seen just beyond the mitachurl.

his first instinct was that it was his god, and he briefly relaxed under the knowledge that he’d get out of this in mostly one piece.

his second was to recognize the torn clothing and dirt-smeared skin, and realize that you could never be his god.

xiao’s eyes narrowed, his spear twisting towards you faster than the distracted mage could react. you, his target, the one he had been seeking out, were hiding behind the abyss. he should have expected it, in truth, figured out the one known for going against the rules of nature would side with the most unnatural force, but that was not for now.

not now, when he was launched forward by the power of anemo, his spear driving him forward, barely skimming the mitachurl in favor of his true target: you.

your eyes barely had the chance to dart in his direction.

xiao was, in truth, not the first one to see you.

many villagers had glimpsed you running around the outskirts of their villages, plucking apples and sunsettias off trees and taking mint from their gardens and leaving bundles of sweet flowers behind instead. they’d seen you, face half-covered in a poor mask made of scraps, your clothes that of the haphazard stitches of the hilichurls, which helped you blend into teyvat a bit more at the price of comfort. many had seen you and assumed you were a run of the mill thief, perhaps one taking advantage of the current hunt since the millelith were occupied. they wryly called you clever, warning the traveling merchants about you, the one they glimpsed at inane hours of night.

he wasn’t the first to see you, by far. he was, however, the first to recognize you.

he was the first to lay eyes upon your form and realize the truth, to realize that the blood seeping into your clothes was the color of stars and galaxies, to recognize that your heart beat blue.

the argument could be made that the hilichurls were the first, or perhaps the mages that had taken you in and brought you food, but it was not them that gathered you into their arms and whisked you away in a flash of teal, uncaring of the spike of cryo that drove into their side at the last minute. the hilichurls did not walk with frosted-over limbs, the abyss did not cry with a throat full of ice, calling for assistance in undoing their own crime.

xiao couldn’t decide whether it was lucky or not that baizhu was in the pharmacy, speaking with herbalist gui over the front desk. on one hand, it was best to have the most experienced healer in liyue at your side, but on the other..

“adeptus xiao, what is-…..”

confusion, then anger, then realization, all flashing over his face in an instant before he tilted his head and walked quickly to a back room, xiao following.

he busied himself with picking the ice off his body and clothes, ignoring the shake of his hands and the stench of blood in the room. the mage had pulled you from the point of his spear, but he still hit the side of your stomach, and he could tell it was messy.

knocks sounded at the door but baizhu turned them away sharply, only allowing qiqi to pass him a bowl of lotus seeds. he was focused, changsheng slithering off his shoulders to grab supplies as needed. time seemed to slow to a crawl, like xiao had entered a domain without an exit, filled with the iron smell of blood and the never ending chips of ice he peeled from his skin. it left behind stinging wounds and red marks, but he couldn’t find it in him to care.

what was his brief moment of injury compared to a scar upon his god?

the moment that baizhu had stopped, all but collapsing into a chair and wiping off his hands with a tired call of ‘it’s done. the foundation will be okay.’ xiao had stood and left, biting his tongue through the protests of both his own body and the doctor.

he’d given changsheng his confession, but he did not wish to stick around and hear his verdict.

weeks later, morax came and visited him at the inn, carrying with him a plate of almond tofu and an apology. xiao leaned against the furthest edge of the balcony, curled around the plate, staying as far as he could from the one with your aura imprinted upon him.

he felt it, when zhongli had first come up the stairs. the shock, then the warmth, the all-encompassing comfort that soothed the pain from the bruising on his shoulder. he felt it, and knew that he did not deserve it.

“it’s not your fault,” zhongli insisted, baritone words colored with unreturned sympathy. “the fake… had fooled us all. even me. i cannot hold your actions against you when i myself would have done the same.”

and maybe that was true. maybe he would have drawn his own weapon, pierced your skin himself, acting on the orders of one who dared to take the place of the divine, but that was irrelevant.

xiao was the one who had hurt you. and it was entirely his fault.

almond tofu, his favorite dish, tasted bitter and sour on his tongue, almost akin to the pain medication that zhongli had made him drink after noticing how cautious he was with his injured arm. he’d made him take the first dose in front of him and swear to take the rest, with a long monologue about taking care of himself tacked on afterwards, but it was for nothing. aside from the first night he had it, xiao hadn’t touched the bottle. it sat on his nightstand, beside a bed he hardly used, taunting him when he returned earlier than usual.

he could take it. there was nothing stopping him from doing so, and he probably should if he wanted to return to his duties quicker. but every time he picked up the glass, thumb tracing over the engravings as he undid the top, he hesitated.

he could take it. he probably should. but did he deserve to?

you were still recovering, possibly still bedridden weeks later. your blood still stained his spear, dripping down to his palms, pale and scarred skin marked further with the blue and purple swirls of his sin. you were still in pain, still healing from a spear to your side, and he was here, reaching for medicine for a sore shoulder?

(it was worse than that. bone had knocked against bone, bruising beneath where muscle could reach. it ached even when he sat as still as possible, dragging him out of every attempt to meditate. the dark purple splotches stretched beyond his clothing, reaching across his back and up his neck, making nearly any action flare the wound. it was far beyond an over-exerted muscle or a particularly tiring day, and yet even the worst nights of his pain were staved off by the memory of having to wash blue off his blade. even as the latch on the bottle was undone, the lip pressed to his, he could never bring himself to drink it)

(even the small droplet of it on the rim, tasting of qingxin extract and violet grass, threatened to make him sick. how dare he?)

yes, it would likely only get him into more trouble were he found out, but he was careful not to be. whenever the wind brought him the heavy presence of geo, zhongli’s familiar footsteps climbing the stairs, he snatched the bottle and emptied it into the stone carving on the balcony, letting the medicine soak into the soil beneath it. it splashed when he was sloppy, the deep purple medicine appearing blue on the stone, sparking a memory that weighed harder on the pit in his stomach.

even as he handed the bottle over to zhongli, his jaw clenched from the strain on his shoulder. the action was stiff, jerky, but evidently smooth enough that it had passed his assessment.

zhongli tucked the bottle away, surprisingly not drawing out a new one.

“i am proud of you, and of the progress you have made,” he said, golden eyes softening in the light of dusk. “well done, xiao.”

how strange, he thought, watching him leave, that the very action that made his vision swim with unshed tears was one that was praised.

he wouldn’t complain, of course. he never would. this pain was his to bear, just as the burden of your bloodshed was his to shoulder. he was well aware his pain could never take back yours—though he wished, desperately, that he could move your injury to him. he wanted to be able to take on the physical reminder of his defect, to take the hit of his own spear to spare you from his lapse in judgement. he would take it, take ten times the pain you endured, if only it meant that your skin was free of his scars.

it would be an honor to assist the divine, even at the price of his own life.

[transmascutena]

these lines hit different when you read utena as transmasc

[volivolition]

any updates about your fics?? :0

(pls don’t feel pressured to respond to this if you’re busy!!)

!! hello anon :3!! <333

ive been writing a specific part for Unstoppable Force, where volition and harry talking to each other. and oh holy shit this fucking conversation is like!!! YEAH it's in character and i know what to write, but it hurts so fucking bad to actually write it, help me hgkjg

while the volition and electrochemistry thing is the main plot, on the side there's also kim who just transferred precincts, and harry who has a crush on him. and the kim/harry parallels to volition/echem... "i'm putting up a front of reserved responsibility and i have to repress any emotion that could compromise my commitment to my duties." immovable object and "i feel like the worst kind of mess and i want to get better but i don't know if i deserve to be helped or loved because im a mess." unstoppable force :']

but VOLITION IS STILL A SKILL, SO HE'S ADVISING HARRY WITH THIS PERSPECTIVE. so when harry says "kim shouldn't like me, huh?" then volition (who is projecting himself and echem onto kim and harry's relationship) swallows and says, "you're right. kim shouldn't like you, and if he does, he feels like he's making a mistake. he probably wants - more than anything in the world - to stop feeling that way, and for you to stop feeling that way about him."

and harry (who is taking this literally because he doesn't know what's happening between voli and echem) sadly agrees "yeah. liking me will probably get in the way of his work. he shouldn't want to love me, that just... wouldn't make sense for him. im only making him worse."

BOYS. ITS A FEEDBACK LOOP. ITS AN ECHO CHAMBER. YOU'RE ONLY FUELING EACH OTHER'S ISSUES. STOP STOP STOP HGJKG

[triptychofvoids]

Hello, maybe you were asked this before, but how can I stop forgetting to drink water? I definitely don't drink enough, but I usually don't feel thirsty either so I simply don't remember about having to drink more often than ≈4 times a day??

hm! this does seem to be a somewhat common issue from what i have seen.. well, you may have heard this advice before, but i know it helps some people to set alarms or reminders on their phones or computers that will remind them to drink water every once in a while. it may also help to have a cup of water or water bottle on standby wherever you spend the most time. for example, if you spend a lot of time at your desk, having a water bottle there on your desk in your line of sight may help you remember or at least be there conveniently for you! if you are not already drinking water with your meals then that may be helpul as well. if you forget or simply dont feel thirsty for most other times of the day, then at least having water with each meal will be much better than nothing if you are not doing that already. finally i am thinking if you dont feel thirsty but you do feel hungry then it may be helpful to eat foods with more water already in them like certain types of fruit and so on....

[thatonepikminperson]

How to kill all of the Pikmin 3 Bosses with ease, aka, how to drop kick six toddlers

Yes, I'm doing one for Pikmin 3, because I also have played this game too much. SHUT, I had quite a while to play this game, and I have learned the ways to beat the shit out of the local six children of this game, aka, the bosses. (Spoilers for Pikmin 3 and it's bosses down below, btw)

FIRST OF ALL, I'm just going to say this once. Unless a boss fight demands you use Rocks, never bring them to a boss fight*, they are ASS at fighting. Bring Reds, trust me.

*There is an ONE exception, and we'll get to them

Armored Mawdad

So this boi is really easy after the first ten seconds. You basically go for the very back of his tail (The tip thing) and break that. He will shake off Pikmin and rest on a wall. Rush the creature with your Pikmin (Reds first) and watch as he gets capped at 1 HP. Then when he comes down again throw one rock at it and dead

Vehemoth Phosbat

Fun fact, you only need to build half of the bridge. No joke, choose which pile you want to bring over. You can put one Captain in the dark to lure the Phosbat over, just keep in mind that you should rush the pile as soon as it starts to try and eat the Captain (It will fail.) Once half of the bridge is built, wait for the Phosbat to try and eat the Captain in the dark again, call them over, throw 20 Yellows and the Captain over and light the room up. From there, you can just bully the Phosbat with the lights you never turned on because yes they still stun the poor bat. GG easy no re.

Sandbelching Meerslug

Easiest boss in the game, like not even by a long shot. The strategy is simple, bring 100 Reds and win. That's it. Just bring 100 (I think 60 should still work, you just got to be more careful), and when the slug does his sink hole thing, RUSH THE MOUTH. It shouldn't kill any Pikmin, and it forces the slug to come up. Bombless and way easier than before.

Scornet Maestro

First of all, why do you need help with this boss. Second, if you are having trouble, just bring another Captain and have the attacks go onto them. Just remember the attacks the Maestro does don't lock in immediately, they can still switch.

Quaggled Mireclops

Alright, you got two options. ONE: Bring 100 Wingeds, and some Spicy-Spray and auto win, or two, Use Blues and Suffer. I suggest the Winged strat, as it's easier and more funny to pull off. Just rush the guy, then rush him again. Also keep an eye on his health as half way, the tonuge attack changes.

Plasm Wraith*

*(THIS IS THE EXCEPTION TO THE ROCK RULE)

ROCKS. This is the only boss fight I'd recommend using Rock Pikmin, for the shear fact that the main attack this Wraith does WILL NOT KILL THEM. The only things that can kill them are the elemental attacks and as long as you don't suck, you should be fine. Rocks can take out Fire and Rock elemental attacks at any time, electricity you gotta be fast, and Water is a don't even try. Other fun facts with this fight, one, if the Wraith is floating, just walk away. If it has nothing to attack, it's forces to land back down, and two, if the Plasm Wraith feels as if it's surrounded, it will walk into one of the elemental attacks. Try to whistle your Pikmin back BEFORE that happens.

[dontbooatme]

DP x BNHA

While on patrol, Aizawa picks up a very stubborn young vigilante tag along. He has no idea how this happened. The kid won't take anything he says seriously. Especially if it's something along the lines of "go home" or "you're under arrest." Attempting to capture him doesn't get Aizawa more than ten minutes of peace before the kid is back. And talking. So much talking.

It was like he'd never met a pro before, the way he talked. There were countless questions about his patrol routes, villains he's faced off with, the "cool scar" under his eye.

Aizawa has had partners before. He's rarely has one so chatty. Not while he's Underground and patrolling nights.

The first time he'd tried to catch the kid, once he realized a stern lecture about interfering with hero work wasn't going to cut it, he'd come so close. He figured a trip to the station was needed as a much more firm scare tactic to keep the kid off the streets and any future heroics in line with the law.

And no "Danny." Hes not going to admit possession is useful. Even if the villain did have a heteromorphic type quirk.

Danny's the first real hero in his world. He's never seen anyone else outside of comics. He couldn't be more thrilled.

[vaperarmand]

any tips for a new author to the DM and Eric and Assad fandom? I am terrible at social media, so any words of advice would help so much! thanks, Jillian!

oooh okay so i know this one is going to get out of hand but i will try to keep it from getting so terribly unwieldy.

as for practical advice:

if you don't have any ideas but still want to write, check out the kinkmeme for ideas! (no rpf on there, but still a bunch for all manner of pairings)

curating your online space is super important. check out the tags, maybe even follow a couple of general interest things you like, but on tumblr especially it's so important to curate who you follow to create the ideal experience for yourself. take some time scrolling through blogs and finding a place where you'll feel fulfilled and inspired fandom and writing wise. it's soooo worth the effort.

as for more abstract advice:

genuinely just have fun!!! don't shy away from interacting with other blogs, making new friends, discussing headcanons, etc. whatever having fun in a fandom space means for you.

for me specifically it has been huge to talk about my writing on my blog rather than just shyly posting on my ao3. in particular the iwtv fandom (or at least everyone i've interacted with) is SO incredibly friendly and encouraging and supportive and i think it helps both the writer and the audience when you like. idk go through the writing process together? everybody has fun. it feels scary and intimidating but it feels so good esp in this community. and definitely the kind of thing where engagement grows over time.

i hope this was helpful!!! i'm glad you're here 🫶

[clarabowmp3]

hi besties I need some advice. So there’s this university I applied to in the early admissions cycle and when I got the invitation they said that if I was “not shortlisted in this cycle, I could apply again in the regular admissions cycle.”

After applying I was shortlisted for interview for one of the uni’s scholar programmes I applied to (the degree I applied to doesn’t have an interview, that’s only for scholarships/scholar programmes etc) and I had my interview one day after the regular admissions cycle opened.

it’s been one week since the regular admissions cycle opened and I haven’t heard anything from them, and I’ve only got a little less than 3 weeks until the regular admissions cycle also closes. No where in their email did they state how/when they would inform if I’ve been accepted/rejected from the uni or the scholars programme I applied to, so now my dilemma is:

Do I just take it that I’ve been rejected from both the uni and scholar programme by default? My interview wasn’t the best so I get it if I’m being rejected from the scholars programme but I should at least get into the uni?? Cuz like why would they go through the effort of shortlisting me for the scholars prog if I wasn’t even going to be accepted into the uni? And also if my grades/essays were good enough to get me shortlisted for the scholars prog surely they would be good enough to get me accepted for my degree??? (Early admissions is based on prelim grades and I literally got only 1 B in a subject that’s so unrelated to the course I’m applying for)

do I email them to ask? My parents think I should but that’s just generally stressful and not a fun time for anyone but also I feel like it’s basic decency to let me know if I’ve been accepted/rejected, esp since the regular admissions are ongoing? Since they said I could reapply in the regular cycle that sort of implies that I would know their decision by then, but also my interview for the scholars programme was one day after the regular cycle opened and idk how long they’ll take to make their decision but also their regular cycle closed on 19 March???? So what then?????????

pls help if anyone has any nuggets of wisdom, I’m kind of peeved w this uni cuz it’s pretty good but also I think it should be basic decency to tell me if I’ve been accepted or not esp since the regular cycle is open, or at the very least say smth like “if you don’t hear from us by this date, your application might have been unsuccessful” and on top of that THEY know when they’re done processing my application, I don’t, so why should I have to email them?? If they’ve come to a decision they can tell me!! I’m just shooting in the dark here w my email shxnxkkxkx

[birdmenmanga]

I gave a whole illustration critique for free and honestly... I like doing this kind of stuff a lot... I actually really like doing critique and feedback for people who are learning to draw...

[lightandfellowship]

[thethingything]

it's been just under 3 days since we took that antibiotic and our brain still doesn't feel right.

all I can do is wait it out and hope it goes away soon, but we've barely been able to do anything for the last few days and honestly until the med fucked us up I wasn't even sure we could get less functional in terms of how bad our dissociation and stuff was but here we are.

I have things I need to do. I have things I was meant to organise. I'm gonna have to explain a bunch of stuff at that oral surgery consultation on Thursday and I have to hope the side effects have eased off by then because with the way our brain currently is, I'm not actually sure I'd be able to explain the things I need to or remember to ask about things I need to bring up.

I've missed doses of my regular meds because of both the brain fog and our sleep schedule getting fucked up because the medication side effects triggered a fatigue flare and we're back to randomly falling asleep and repeatedly getting stuck in a loop of falling asleep and then waking up just enough to register that we need to do something but not enough to actually open our eyes and do the thing before falling asleep again several times over the course of a few hours and having really vivid dreams that kind of blur together with reality so we wake up really disoriented.

I'm simultaneously overwhelmed, and too brain foggy and dissociated to really register what's making me overwhelmed, but then I think about something that I know has been stressing me out and I just kind of feel apathetic? I guess? and I've had the same thing with stuff I'd normally be really excited/enthusiastic about no matter how bad our depression gets. it's horrible because it's like, I know I care about this thing, I know I feel strongly about it, but I can't access any of those feelings and it's making me feel like I'm not properly myself and that's freaking me out really badly

[lavendermanna]

top 3 pieces of advice i would give to my younger self:

you're a girl (obviously)

smoke more weed

make more bad art

[freebooter4ever]

my biggest complaint is that i wanted blonde workaholic dude to be charmed and fall in love with her so penelope has some experience before colin suddenly decides to change his mind. colin is such a mess i still don't like him :( how are we supposed to believe that he really loves her? he was so mean before :(

Anyway watching this show does make me regret that i never actually experienced requited Love in the romantic sense. now that penelope has been 'fixed' magically by a new dress and better hairdos, the only character left to identify with is the blonde workaholic whose name i cant even remember

[tea-and-secrets]

I am genuinely obsessed with my friend and I don't know how to cope with it. I spend all day thinking about them at school, drawing them in the corners of my books, namelessly talking about him to my other friends, when I think about going home I just think about talking to them.

Then of course when I get home we'll exchange a few messages and he'll leave to talk to their other friends, so then I'm upset he doesn't want to spend every possible moment with me. But instead of just doing something else, I put on some music and just wait for him to get back, because I don't have any hobbies or anyone who'll want to talk to me or really any actual life outside of my friends.

I've realized they spend a lot of time on amino, so I've made an amino account to watch them talk to other people with. I know its wrong and weird but I feel empty without him and what they don't know can't hurt them, right? I'm a fantastic friend otherwise, always there for them and interested in what he has to say. They're really nice to me but never gives that back in return, though I can't bring myself to be mad at him most of the time.

I sleep at 2am to say goodbye when they go to school, and wake up at 7am to greet him when they get back. I make them gifts and tell him I love him. I'd tear up my entire life for them (not like there's much to tear up anyway) I feel like my only worth is being useful to them

This is half vent and half cry for help please does anyone know what I can do. Anyway anyway byeeee have a good day

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