#-literally anything else in the whole world

[kashverse]

Imagine someone making mama reader cry and minisukuna is just roasting who man her cry’s ass, while sukuna is trying to hold back from murder

i didn't wanna make the mamakuna's reading this cry, so have a bit of banter instead. i hope this is what you were requesting for!

rule number 1 in a sukuna family barbecue is to kiss the cook—aka mamakuna, aka you.

rule number 1.2? only babykuna and sukuna can kiss the chef. no exceptions.

but the most important rule—the one etched in stone, the one more sacred than sukuna’s secret steak rub recipe—is rule number 2:

never. insult. the cook.

so when yuki, choso’s plus one, decides to run her mouth at the absolute wrong time, saying, “not gonna lie, this chicken is kinda dry,” there is an immediate, deafening silence. choso, sitting next to her, freezes mid-bite, eyes darting around like he’s witnessing a live execution. nanami takes a slow sip of his beer, very wisely deciding he wants no part in whatever is about to happen. gojo, ever the shit-stirrer, grins and leans in. “oh-ho-ho, you done fucked up.” meanwhile, you? you just blink.

"oh?"

it’s just one word, but it’s enough to send chills down the spines of everyone within earshot. sukuna, who had been manning the grill (read: standing around looking important while you did all the real work), slowly sets down the tongs.

his jaw twitches. his veins pop. he looks two seconds away from committing murder.

"who made the food, yuki?" he asks, voice dangerously calm. yuki, still blissfully unaware of the shitstorm she’s just walked into, shrugs. "i dunno, the caterer?"

sukuna exhales through his nose, like he’s actively trying to keep his soul from leaving his body.

"your caterer is literally sitting right there," choso hisses under his breath, eyes darting to you. yuki, now finally putting two and two together, has the audacity to look sheepish. "oh. uhh…"

but before she can say anything else—

"DODOHEAD!!"

everyone turns to look at babykuna, who is fuming, tiny fists clenched, eyes ablaze with unwavering rage. "how dare you," she huffs, looking as offended as if yuki had personally spit on a framed picture of you.

"i—it’s not that deep—"

“SHAME ON YOU, POOPIEHEAD!!” babykuna stomps her foot, dramatically clutching her heart like she’s a widow in a soap opera. "mama’s food is the best in the whole world!"

"i didn't mean—"

"take it back!" babykuna demands. yuki blinks, caught between disbelief and fear.

"uh…?"

"TAKE. IT. BACK."

babykuna’s arm lifts. her grip tightens around the precious stuffed labubu in her hand. and before anyone can stop her—

"oh, hell no," sukuna mutters, finally snapping.

"you listen here, you ungrateful shit—"

"okay!" choso interjects, physically holding his brother back before this barbecue turns into a crime scene. 

"yuki," he hisses, “apologize before you get us both killed.” yuki, now 100% convinced she is not leaving this barbecue alive, raises her hands.

"okay, okay! i’m sorry!"

"say it like you mean it!" babykuna shouts, labubu still armed and ready.

"i mean it!!"

yuki, now sweating bullets, looks at you.

"your food is great. i love it. i’m sorry."

babykuna narrows her suspicious little eyes.

"hmph."

after ten long seconds of dramatic silence, she finally lowers labubu.

"...i forgive you."

yuki exhales in relief.

"but don���t do it again, dodohead!"

sukuna grumbles under his breath, still looking like he wants to throw hands. but then you, grinning, lean over and kiss his cheek. "down, boy," you tease. "i don’t need you getting blood on my good plates."

he grunts. “whatever.” but he still sends a glare yuki’s way.

“next time, i will let babykuna throw the labubu.”

[jewish-vents]

A young goy friend of mine who runs in progressive circles asked me earlier, near panic, hey, you're not a Zionist, are you?

And of course because he's a teenager I told him neutrally that I'm for the upholding of human rights and against suffering for anyone, but could he please not bring this up again, the subject is sore for me.

But I have to wonder, why would it have made this young person who trusts and looks up to me despise me, to hear that I thought that we had the right to a country, that we were native there and that recent political maneuvering of the concept of indigeneity didn't diminish that?

Everybody else is allowed to be "native" somewhere, to have a home that it's accepted they can feel connected to. Everyone else's traditions regarding their land are sacred. Only we have to live our lives running, always running, passing down ancient keys to houses that won't be there when we go back. Only for us is it not colonialism if they build over our holy places — and now the mask is off and it's praxis too.

This is justice for us, somehow. This is fair for us, somehow. Not for them, not even for people who actively want to live on the road; and whole cultures of such people do exist. But for us, absolutely! It's fair that Jews should run. It's what they do. Their ecological niche.

Zionism, by which for some reason these people mean Kahanism if they mean anything, but they'll never be honest about that because it would make them look stupid, is a force of evil in the world unlike anything before it.

It's worse than anything Hamas has ever done, yeah, why do you ask? Worse than Hitler? Sure, yes, literally worse than Hitler. You're not a Zionist, are you?

.

[raayllum]

Immortality & Longevity in TDP

Because season 7 brought up some very interesting Threads to contrast with the series' previous sentiments on immortality / ridiculously long lifespans. So let's go.

Those Who Naturally Live Forever(-ish)

There are three main camps of characters who experience longevity in TDP.

Those who experience it naturally, but can still die (the Archdragons, some elves)

Those who acquire it through dark magic means

Those who cannot permanently die (the First Elves, Aaravos)

I want to talk about the Group Number One first, because it includes the most characters and was the basis for this meta. Besides Lujanne and Akiyu, we don't know too many elves who have lived for hundreds of plus years, although it wouldn't surprise me if Aditi did. Lujanne and Akiyu are both mages as well, with Lujanne living at the most powerful concentration of Moon magic in the world, so that could be part of the reason why she's lived so long, and Tidebound elves (as Finnegrin had Sea Legs' sister for 40+ years) just naturally live much longer than other types of elves (Moonshadow, Sunfire) as far as we know.

The Archdragons themselves also don't talk much about the length of their lives, since it's a species-shared trait and so second nature to them. However, whenever they do talk about it, we get a very clear picture:

It's not exactly... positive. Now, some of this is because of their mental states. Sol Regem lost his beloved mate a thousand years ago, lost his position as the king of the dragons, and been effectively cut off from Xadia's political sphere / the other archdragons for a long time. Rex Igneous is similarly isolated (though it seems more self-inflicted) and we know he had a previous falling out with Avizandum (presumably over Zubeia). We also see Zubeia grow increasingly listless both times she falls ill / almost loses her family (S3, 5x09) so it seems that despite being very rare and accordingly isolationist, Archdragons don't tend to do well alone and without families (understandably).

But the verdict seemingly from at least 2/4ish known archdragons is that

In this way, the Archdragons' view of their quasi-immortality isn't that different from how Aaravos views his literal one:

The stars have never smiled upon their creations. This world was made by cruel, unfeeling hands. It is an instrument of pain, of torment. To exist within this world is to suffer. Even death is no reprieve.

So what about the characters who disagree to the point of doing terrible things so that they can exist forever?

Kpp'ar and Kim'Dael (Crafted Immortality)

Although there's only two characters in the "dark magic induced immortality" category, they paint two such completely different pictures that, in many ways, it shows the full spectrum of just how one can achieve an unnatural immortality.

On the one hand, we have Kim'Dael, who takes dark magic's canonically to its long believed natural conclusion of cannibalism. Kim'Dael takes parts (blood) from magical creatures (in this case, elves) and consumes it to enhance her own abilities and her livelihood. This doesn't always mean fully killing and draining someone, but often can (Bloodmoon Huntress) with multiple individuals / sometimes whole families at a time as she must experience semi-regular rejuvenation; it is unknown if she needs to eat or consume anything else in her day-to-day life.

Her magic use was also confirmed to be a form of dark magic in this interview:

the way that she does, is beyond primal magic. She’s found ways through dark magic to extend her primal moon powers. It’s very evil how she is able to do what she does and extend her life

Despite the dragons who don't have to work to be immortal being far more despondent about their long, long lives, it's not hard to think of reasons why Kim'Dael would want to be immortal. Death is a scary unknown, she (like Finnegrin) is out of tune with her primal knowingness on a fundamental level, and she can do so without harm to herself. Like most dark mages we've seen, her dark magic use requires using and taking from the people around her more, accordingly, than it's taking from her. She takes from others to give herself power: dark magic 101.

Kpp'Ar's search for immortality is way fucking weirder, IMO. It's not necessarily that dark mages, or dark magic, never uses the caster's body for spells. It inherently saps energy (hence the white streaks, nosebleeds, collapsing, etc) and drains life from the body; each spell harms the caster in at least a small way. It's also not like we've never seen a dark mage use their own body parts for a spell; Claudia uses and drinks her own blood mixed into the pentapus ink in 5x09, and Viren mutilates his own heart in 6x08 rather than use someone else's.

It's just, that if Kim'Dael has a way to chase immortality that does mean using somebody else's body... why on earth would you use your own?

It seems that before his change of heart, Kpp'Ar was experimenting with one of the darkest of all magics. A way of extending life. Indefinitely. A horrible and strange kind of immortality. The ancient and disturbing practice of self-eating.

Now, some of this may come down to access or skillset. Presumably Kim'Dael could drink human blood and use it for her spells, since the arcanum of the elf she's drinking from doesn't seem to matter. However, even if you can use human blood, Kpp'Ar at this point was older and used a cane (if we assume this was a later in life pursuit, and not over decades); he likely wasn't going to be able to kidnap and haul back anyone but children back to Puzzle House, and while we know he's willing to sacrifice children (6x06) it's not canonically clear if he's willing to use them.

Either way, we know Kpp'Ar was pursuing immortality as well as the location of the Garden of Innocents concurrently. We don't know if this was interrelated, but we do know that unicorns are connected to the Star arcanum, which is presumably what makes First Elves immortal-ish so... maybe? It's not clear why Kpp'Ar would want immortality in general, especially that type of immortality, for himself, but clearly there will be a reason. It could be that he wanted to transfer it to someone else (Soren) and gave up, but that's not fundamentally different than what Kim'Dael does, so... again: why himself?

(Arc 3 come home to me)

Cannot Die

Last but not least, we have Aaravos + the other First Elves in the 'cannot die' category, except when they can (Leola). I've written more before about how... odd the info surrounding what the Cosmic Council can and cannot do and what we may be missing, for lack of a better term. Quick rundown:

The Cosmic Council can execute Startouch elves. Aaravos did not have enough power to stop them. (*At the time of Leola's death, as things may have changed since then)

Aaravos seems to be utterly unconcerned that the Cosmic Council conceivably could, if they became aware of his actions, execute him in the same manner. Aaravos does not seem to care if they notice, given that he asks, "Are you watching?" in 7x08.

When Aaravos' mortal form (like the one Leola had/used on earth) is destroyed in 7x09, there are noticeable visual differences to the destruction of his daughter's.

Aaravos seems to want to bring the First Elves into "this world" as it is an instrument of pain that begets only suffering, and "I want them to suffer."

We also know that Aaravos believes the First Elves don't care about / love their creations at all, so destroying the earth can't be the endgame goal. We also know that something is keeping Aaravos from accessing/attacking them, otherwise he would've done so before being imprisoned.

Presumably, something in the interim has changed with either 1) Aaravos is no longer able to die or 2) He has found a way to be able to kill the other First Elves if they went after him, rather than the other way around. Potentially dark magic is the road to get there, or a form of ancient magic the First Elves tried to keep hidden that became the basis for dark magic.

Either way, we know that the First Elves are able to end an otherwise truly immortal being's existence permanently (at least so far) and that it's a power at one point Aaravos did/does not have. I'll be curious to see what we learn about all of this and self-eating in the future.

[lilycelebi-side-blog]

100 percent relatable....

I was so insecure about being in a system. First came denial. Then came an identity crisis that lasted over a year. I was forced to play a million roles over the course of my life, and the realization that I wasn't just the most versatile, yet unstable neurotypical person ever broke me. Now, there was something fundamentally *wrong* with me. It had to be fixed. ...but it couldn't be fixed. No one even had a label for it, in the beginning. No one knew how. My journey in the medical/psychiatric/psychological fields as a system related to what this post says about these communities, and they continue to be so dehumanizing and demoralizing that I do not seek help. I had one singular good therapist, and that is all I've ever had.

And it's ironic, too, that I used to invalidate endogenic systems in my brain when **they could literally be traumagenic and not even know -- traumatic amnesia is literally a DID/OSDD/C-PTSD/dissociation in general thing!!** My exclusionary mentality wasn't even logically sound on a surface level -- if only traumagenic systems are "real" or "valid," then... what about those who don't know? What about those questioning? What about the nuance that is interpreting labels, terms, etc. differently system to system?

Regardless of label, origin, brain organization, symptoms, or whatever else... we're all in this together, fending for ourselves in a world that treats us with stigma, disdain, ignorance, abuse, etc. even in the medical/psych community.

Don't discriminate against or exclude any type of system, headmate, etc. There's no point, and it only circles back around to hurt you. Just like with any other group, in general, inclusion is far more effective than exclusion will ever be.

If you find yourself being exclusionary... look inward at potential insecurities, then consider that there might be many things you don't yet understand that are misleading you into seeing the harmful picture of the world you're seeing.

Consider that this harmful picture will eventually circle right back around to you -- if you target one designation of system, it just fuels hatred against all systems, since you're portraying a whole subset of systems as "ridiculous", and the general public does not care about the nuance most of the time. The general public loves to generalize and generate harmful stereotypes from edge cases.

Consider celebrating others. Consider loving others. Consider tolerating others, even. Consider "live and let live," and "to each their own." Anything but hatred of fellows.

Before I got professional help from a DID specialist, I was a very violently anti-endo sysmed. Ironically, pursuing help and taking my medication regularly helped me open up to the idea of non-traumagenic systems.

Before I had access to professional help, I was angry at the world. I was angry at the doctors for not accepting my insurance even though I so desperately needed their help, and I was angry at the endogenics for seemingly getting the "easy" and "fun" parts of my disorder. It was insecurity. I blamed them for how people outside of the community treated me, I blamed them for making us look bad.

I held out hope for the definitive "medical truth" to validate me, I wanted someone to look at me and say:

"I know EXACTLY what is wrong with you, and I can fix you."

But sadly that was just a dream. After cycling through a handful of specialists and settling on my current one, I realized they're learning from me as much as I'm learning from them. Every single specialist had a wildly different definition of what DID looks like, and even is. What it's caused by, and what it's not. Some specialists were open to the idea of endogenic systems existing, some were not.

DID/OSDD medical information is a footnote in a medical textbook. So many of the terms that diagnosed traumagenics use are not decided upon by a medical consensus. Even the specialists are extrapolating heavily based on the very limited information there is about this disorder.

That's when it hit me.

The doctors don't know shit. The community dosent know shit. So damn it all to hell I don't care anymore.

Traumagenic and Endogenic systems are in the same boat. We are all still discovering what it even means to be plural. There's no set definition, even within the sysmed community. So why are we so desperately trying to invalidate each other's experiences just to try to convince others, and ourselves, that our lived experiences are real?

[pixiedurango]

Oooh! Could we see a letter from Teia to Lucanis, giving him relationship advice now that he and (any)Rook are together?

I just think that could be funny, because Lucanis would be mortified, but also taking notes 😂.

Here we go again, the Antivan Postal Service delivers its second letter today. Hope you like it and hopefully I was able to make it different enough from the first one to not be redundant. I decided to make this the follow-up letter to the first one posted earlier today, so there is Lucanis' answer mentioned.

If anyone feels inspired to write the missing letter from him to Teia - be my guest and drop it into the letterbox.

Transcript:

Lucanis,

I was delighted to read that you took the chance to invite Rook for a picnic from that food crate I sent along with my last letter. But excuse me, you had that picnic WHERE? On top of the lighthouse? We really need to set up a visit, this sounds unbelievable. And romantic, dare I say. You seem to do good with that blooming connection to our dear Rook. Maybe you discovered that infamous Dellamorte charme, which your Cousin clearly has over-cultivated and in abundance

Speaking of Illario. Maybe Viago IS a miracle worker after all - even though he denies it. But your cousin is doing quite alright, given the circumstances. Of course, he does not work contracts at this point and is stuck with paper work of no greater significance. But at least it keeps him busy and inside the offices in the Diamond’s belly instead of having him mingling at the casino or - even worse - anywhere else in Treviso.

Of course, he complains. And to an extent I do even understand him - it’s boring and repetitive. Then I look back at what he has done to you, to Caterina and to all of us Crows. If it had been me back then, I would not have had it in me to pardon him. Now after some time has passed, and I found enough calm to think about it, I guess I start to understand, why you and Rook decided how you did - and even if I still despise him and his actions, I will defend your decision and to an extend him, too. But he better not try his luck on that too much!

Now back to more pleasant topics: Tell me about Rook and yourself! You know I’m dying of curiosity and if curiosity kills the cat, I’m ready to hear everything - or die. I already told you, that picnic you mentioned was a brilliant idea. And the catering… outstanding!

You two have so much on your shoulders. The whole team has. But especially Rook. Make sure she gets enough sleep, eats well and make her smile a lot!

I know, you are a gift giver - do I have to mention the ‘Dagger Incident’? I’m sure, by now, you have reflected in depth about the significance of communication along your gifts.

And even though Rook may be a lover of a good blade, just like every Crow - you might consider finding something more… delicate. Less job related. If you can’t come up with anything at some point, flowers are fine but get redundant pretty fast. See them as a last resort. Jewelry seems to be a safe bank, but I recommend not pulling out the real big ones too soon. A pretty brooch, or a hair pin. This kind of stuff. And wait with the gold and diamonds. Silver and colorful gemstones are pretty, too. And less… let me call it pompous. I know you could literally buy the whole world for her, and sometimes you might feel you want to actually do it. Just. Don’t. We both know her well enough that this is not what she wants or needs. Lucanis, dear, I know you are always doing your best and given the person I know you are, do never worry. Rook knows what she wants, and she has a pretty good taste, too. Let me know if you need anything, Treviso is just an eluvian away. Always yours -Teia

[enemiestolovershoe]

20 Moments bf!Chris Made Your Heart Swell

bf!Chris who always makes sure you get home safe

It doesn’t matter if you’re out with friends, running errands, or just heading home from work—Chris won’t sleep until he knows you’re safe. "Text me when you get home," he always says. And if you forget? Your phone buzzes with a simple, "You home, love?" Every time, without fail.

bf!Chris who memorizes your coffee order

You never have to ask—he just knows. One morning, you were running late, and before you could even stress about skipping your caffeine fix, he handed you your usual. "Figured you’d need it," he said with a smirk.

bf!Chris who leaves his hoodies at your place on purpose

You always tell him he forgets them, but he never corrects you. "You just look cuter in them," he admits one night when you’re curled up in his hoodie, sleeves covering your hands.

bf!Chris who will literally drop anything for you

You once called him in the middle of a frustrating grocery run because the self-checkout machine wasn’t working. Five minutes later, he walked through the sliding doors, shaking his head with a grin. "Can’t leave you alone for one second, huh?"

bf!Chris who always pulls you closer in his sleep

Even when he’s dead asleep, his body knows where yours is. If you roll away, he’ll instinctively reach for you, mumbling something incoherent before tucking you against his chest.

bf!Chris who hypes you up over everything

New outfit? "Damn, my girl looks fine." Finished a book? "Look at you, a whole scholar." Made dinner? "Oh, we’re eating like royalty tonight!" No accomplishment is too small for his full support.

bf!Chris who gives you the last bite of everything

It doesn’t matter if it’s his favorite meal—if you want it, it’s yours. "Nah, I’m full," he’ll say, but you know he’s lying.

bf!Chris who kisses your forehead like it’s second nature

In the mornings, before he leaves, in the middle of conversations—it just happens. Sometimes, he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. It’s just instinct.

bf!Chris who holds your hand under the table

Even in a crowded restaurant with all his friends, his hand finds yours. He doesn’t need to say anything—just having you close is enough.

bf!Chris who makes you feel like the only person in the world

At the end of the day, no matter what’s going on, he always makes time for you. "You good, baby?" he’ll ask, tucking a stray hair behind your ear. And when he looks at you, you know—there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

bf!Chris who texts you “good morning” and “goodnight” every single day

Even if he’s right next to you, even if he saw you five minutes ago—he still sends them. "Just in case you forget how much I love you," he says with a smirk.

bf!Chris who instinctively rests his hand on your thigh when he’s driving

It’s not even a conscious thing anymore. The second he gets in the car, his hand finds your leg, his thumb absentmindedly tracing circles against your skin.

bf!Chris who takes random photos of you when you’re not looking

You’ll find them in his camera roll—some blurry, some candid, all taken with a quiet kind of love. "I just like having pictures of my girl," he shrugs when you catch him.

bf!Chris who brings you snacks when you’re working late

If you’re busy, he won’t interrupt—he’ll just quietly place your favorite snack next to you and press a quick kiss to your temple before walking away.

bf!Chris who randomly tucks your hair behind your ear

It doesn’t matter where you are—talking, eating, watching a movie—if your hair falls in your face, he gently brushes it back without a second thought.

bf!Chris who rubs your back until you fall asleep

Some nights, when your mind won’t shut off, he just runs his hand up and down your back in slow, soothing motions until you drift off.

bf!Chris who makes up the dumbest nicknames for you

Some are cute, some are questionable, but they’re all undeniably Chris. "Come on, snickerdoodle," he’ll say, completely serious.

bf!Chris who always waits for you to walk inside before driving off

Even if you tell him it’s fine, he won’t leave until he sees you step inside. "Just wanna make sure my girl’s safe," he says every time.

bf!Chris who always notices the little things

New earrings? "Cute." Different perfume? "You smell good, baby." Something’s off? "What’s wrong?" Nothing about you goes unnoticed.

bf!Chris who pulls you closer when someone flirts with you

He’s not the jealous type, but if someone’s being too bold, his arm finds your waist, his lips press against your temple, and his voice is soft but firm—"She’s with me."

Taglist: @sophand4n4 @courta13

[the--highlanders]

what do you think jamie does after he's sent back to scotland without his memories?

i think he's always been torn between loving his home, the house he grew up in and the river he played in as a child and the hills he knows like the back of his hand, and yet still deeply longing to leave his little world behind, because he never quite fit right. (and he did! he got out!) but then suddenly he's right back there. he goes back to his childhood home but it's not home anymore and he doesn't know why.

so would he stay and try to fit again, even though he's grown out of his place there? or would he leave, and go looking for whatever had changed him?

YESSS I am so 100% on board with everything you said here. jamie really feels to me like he's someone who's so deeply rooted in his place and his culture, and yet someone who's been battling off this sense of isolation his whole life, and it's all tangled up and complicated inside him. in part he knows his home like the back of his hand /because/ he was somewhat isolated and spent a bunch of time wandering around on his own, and connects to his culture so much because he was chasing a sense of belonging. and on the other hand he had friends and was probably well-liked! but the isolation is still there. maybe even worse for the fact that he wasn't entirely alone.

I do think the crucial point to what jamie does when he's back in scotland is. why exactly he stepped on board the tardis in the first place. which is something I still don't feel like I've fully been able to express even after literal years of trying, maybe because it works best as an impulse borne of him having a deeply traumatic turned deeply strange day. I hc that while jamie's father, brother, and best friend have now died, his mother is still alive and at home, along with other relatives and much of the rest of his community. he /has somewhere to go back to/. he chooses not to go to france and to try his luck with making it home instead, and then all of a sudden he's stepping onto the tardis. sure, he's somewhat confused, and certainly doesn't know what's happening or that he won't be able to get back - but he does still go with them. in that moment, some part of him wanted /out/. going with people he knew to france didn't tempt him, but running off with basically total strangers did. he wanted an entirely fresh start, a blank slate.

on the flip side, the jamie who gets sent back after the war games is /different/, even subconsciously. somewhere buried in there is a person who's more mature, has had three more years of experience, has dealt with so much more and stepped up in ways he probably couldn't have dreamt of when he first left scotland. he's dropped back on drumossie moor, apparently in daylight, presumably with something implanted in his head telling him that the doctor and ben and polly left, he waved them off and turned towards home. so I think that's what he'd do - he'd go home, and try to pick up the pieces as best he could.

at this point, and as he realises more and more that something's /not right/ and he's missing something, I think his sense of isolation is worse than ever. he's so, so close to snapping. but his whole world is holding on by a thread, now - his own family has been decimated, many others are in the same position, they're close enough to culloden and inverness to be subject to a few reprisals and raids from the government - and oddly enough I think that holds him together. he steps up, because somewhere deep inside he knows how to do that now. he's grown up. maybe everyone else just puts it down to the war. it's not like they know any better. and if we know anything about jamie, it's that he can hold himself together if someone else needs him. is it good for him? certainly not. but he's hanging in there.

in my timeline for things he does settle down somewhat once he starts to regain his memories and understand what's happened to him. it /is/ just another thing that sets him apart, and that always hurts, but he's also more confident and understands more about himself than he did growing up, so it rattles him less. he's probably easy to talk to and go to with problems, and friendly enough that you never really realise he doesn't open up about himself. he grows into a bit of a leadership position in his village, and it's good for him, in a way. he's also his own person, not his father's son, and I think that's a sick sort of relief for him. marrying kirsty also helps, because she's a fellow misfit and a great friend, and someone who he can share the truth with. their 'more children than there are days of the week' are lost and orphaned kids they collect, because he's not going to let anyone else grow up alone. it's a weird sort of limbo where he's waiting for the doctor but also has no certainty that he'll ever see him again, where he's made a life he's proud of with people he loves and yet there's always parts of him that are desperately unhappy - but he's getting by. he's good. he's got good things that get him through.

if he /didn't/ get his memories back, though, if he was just caught in that confusion forever... that's where I could really see him leaving. at some point he /does/ snap, and he just. heads off on his own, looking for something he can't remember. it feels good, to always be on the road, maybe to help people where he can as he passes through. he's not tied to anyone, doesn't have to be who anyone else wants him to be, and there's freedom in that. but he always feels like he /shouldn't/ be alone in this, that he should be wandering with someone.

[strawberry-selfships]

waaaaa ok if this is an invitation (& I hope it’s ok for non mutuals bc I have not met you yet but you seem wonderful) I wanna talk about j jonah jameson aka that guy who really wants pictures of spider-man LOL

and this is really long so genuinely no obligation or pressure to respond.

ok here I go. he makes me so happy… he’s extremely passionate about his viewpoints and will say them to the world both by newspaper and by voice because he wants them to be known, even when being anti-superhero is an unpopular stance. he doesn’t care. he’s brave when people argue him, he’s brave when people slander him, he’s brave when literal villains come to try and take his life. both in the movies and in the comics. he may loathe spider-man (especially because he doesn��t know who spider-man actually IS) but he stands up for everyone else. he protects peter parker’s privacy and safety when green goblin is genuinely about to kill him. he stands up for marginalized people even when it has him in danger. he goes to work every single day in the building that says his newspaper’s name in bright big letters, knowing that anyone could come for him at any moment.

and his motivation? his motivation for loathing spider-man so much? well, they vary from iteration to iteration but two have stuck with me.

first is the one from the comics. his self loathing and his envy. this shit KILLS me because ALL of the positive things he says about spider-man are true of him too. (which I’ve rambled about in more specific detail in another post) he can’t see himself on the same level of bravery as spider-man so instead he uses his time to tear him down, be one opposing force to him that isn’t a masked villain. he’s so clouded by the popularity of spider-man and the tellings of him saving people directly that he can’t see that he also possesses these qualities, because the circumstances in which he is brave and heroic are different and not seen or praised by the public.

and the second one is from his radio show in the spider-man ps4 game which I can’t post as a video in a reblog so I’ll link it here and post this transcription:

I’m bad at distinguishing tone but I genuinely don’t think he’s joking or kidding or anything here. it’s passion. it’s all passion, and concern for the well-being of his city that he’s presumably grown up and spent his entire life in. because of the way his passion manifests, he struggles to not come off as angry. I'm sure sometimes he actually IS angry, but he's trying to say here that oftentimes he ISN'T and it just comes off that way because he gets loud when he gets passionate about what he's talking about. (happens to me too actually...) the presence of spider-man and his villains in his city makes him concerned for the future and it only comes out as anger, even if it is and even if it isn’t. but my point here which he said himself is that he’s motivated by love for his city and his passion for seeing it thrive and thus he sees the appearance of spider man as a threat to it, and that he's not trying to come off as angry. he just has a LOT of passion. I don’t know maybe that sounds really stupid. I’m not trying to say he does no wrong because I know he can genuinely be overly harsh, I’m just trying to say that he's not angry all the time even though he sounds like it, and that he’s capable of love and compassion, even if it seems like anger. and again I'm sure sometimes he does get genuinely angry about these things! I'd be pissy too if I was under the stress of living in such a dangerous city every day, especially as such an influential and recognized person! but it's not always the case.

MY WHOLE POINT ABOUT ALL OF THIS BEING…. I LOVE HIM. he’s brave, he’s loving, he’s compassionate, he’s concerned about the wellbeing of the future of his city as well as the people in it including those who are marginalized…. and yet he struggles to see good in himself…… I love him so much. I love him so much. I want to be there for him. waaa

uhhhh hey ! u there !!!! free pass to reblog n gush abt ur f/os or s/is n storylines n literally anything that makes u happy. i will respond (some tonight, most tomorrow) n we can talk abt it !!!!!! no amount is too much <3

dividers by @/saradika-graphics

[spotsupstuff]

Love the fact that Suns is in constant danger from Zephyr, do you think she could ever convince them to join her cause?

nah man, not this fucker. they don't Want to be convinced Specifically cuz if they Did admit that Zephyr might have a point with her cause it'd make Them into a really horrible person

and heavens, that is the last thing Suns wants to be

[msnihilist]

I still don't think Ben did anything wrong during "Duped." He deserves to do normal teenage boy stuff like see a movie on opening day, and he was trying to give himself that while also saving the world AND supporting his girlfriend's tennis match. He didn't spend enough time with his duplicates to realize that they had opposing personalities to their assignments — it's not like he sent his asshole-self to Julie's match on purpose.

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

What if Christos Lawton is the one responsible for putting I Say A Little Prayer For You on the official George Hodgson playlist. What then. On the one hand I would have to set myself on fire but on the other hand it would be FANTASTIC news for whoever authored my all time favorite post on the Cold Boys Kink Meme

[artem1sc0re]

Dropping the reveal of my main operatives through doodles because why not 🗣️🗣️‼️‼️

Here’s their appearances in game as well :>

Close-ups:

[luckyyyduckyyy]

Feel free to ignore this, yapping into the void makes me feel better

Bros... The day I had went from good, to eh, to wtf

Even my own body tried to kill me today what /hj

[rubber-glovs]

Oooohhh the urge to yap about my ocs and the world they live in......

[synthetic-rust]

What they don’t tell you about autism is that it feels like you’re simultaneously one step outside of reality yet two steps too far into it at all times

[pinkfey]

is anyone else kind of bummed that we don’t get to see neve’s trans friends lol