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probably-haven · 3 years ago

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Spoilers Galor ...... it is time.... for me to do what ive been considering for quite some time

this is my arguement... on why, whether romantically or platonically, i think you should ship or bro-ship,...... Childe.... and Albedo

HERE ME OUT I SWEAR PLEASE IT MAKES SENSE IN MY HEAD- JUST GIVE IT A CHANCE! rarepair shipping is painful- join me

OR DONT EVEN IF YOU DONT WANT TO GIVE THE SHIP A CHANCE I DO A LOT OF ANALYSIS ON ALBEDO AND CHILDE’S CHARACTERS INDIVIDUALLY, AS WELL AS THE FATUI, THEYRE METHODS, AND THE RELATION WITH MONDSTADT- AND OTHER STUFF- just- if you like reading different analysis-es of the game or ship material or anything-

please just consider skimming it possibly-

so for the first section of my argument, i will cover why this is a largely feasible possibility, so let’s set the stage

- Childe is from Snezhnaya, and he is shown to have a large amount of ties to his home, including but not limited to; his family, ice fishing, and just a large number of nostalgic references in his voice lines.

- Because of this it’s a pretty common occurrence that he finds himself feeling homesick, as with many of the other Fatui.

- This is why he, like many of the other Fatui, so frequently visit and camp within Dragonspine, where the cold snowy atmosphere serves to remind them of home and the things they left behind.

- also in his birthday letter, it says he canonically visits Dragonspine, but explaining it this way gives it feeling

- so considering that he would be in Dragonspine relatively often, and given the large number of Fatui camps in there regardless, it’s pretty clear he’d have heard of Albedo. So onto Albedo (unfortunately i wasnt there for his event so i dont have as much fuel, but it is what it is)

- there’s a few things that need to be asked first- It’s pretty clear that Albedo must have some interaction with the Fatui given the sheer number of them that camp in Dragonspine. Evidentially, he’s still alive so the question is why? and there’s a few possible explanations for this.

- He just sneaks around a lot or avoids them (this i think is unlikely, as it would limit his actions while conducting experiments as well as the places where he’d be able to conduct them, which isn’t a big deal, but when there are other options I don’t think this is the one he’d pick) - He just pulls a traveler and kills them (i don’t think he would do this except for as a last resort, he’s rather disconnected from any sense of empathy yes, but his time is better spent elsewhere. If it comes to that, it comes to that and he will, but he wouldn’t do it as his first option) (also i dont use geo characters much so idk how good he’d be at breaking their shields in this case) - The Fatui don’t bother or attack him out of their own choice

- i think the third is the most likely, which sounds dumb but hear me out.

- something that is stressed time and time again during the mondstadt archon quest is the fact that nobody wants to increase the always present strain on diplomatic relations between Mondstadt and Snezhnaya. - Sure the Fatui do not care very much about this and have many ways to get around this. Signora attacking Venti (technically not a diplomat, and by disappearing she had plausible deniability; traveler’s words against her own, and really both traveler and Venti weren’t supposed to survive that, hence “leave no trace”), or the Fatui constantly attacking the traveler, (who’s canonically travelling alone with only Paimon, always on the move and encountering many unfamiliar dangers, not hard to clear up) - However despite this, I still believe that Albedo’s safety(and by extent that of Sucrose and Timeus) on Dragonspine is maintained by a mixture of political agreement, situational convenience, and Albedo’s own actions

- its difficult for this to work but i believe it’s the most likely answer, combining all three possibilities that i mentioned above. - Albedo is an official Knight of Favonius, so his death would cause a pretty dramatic commotion, and since he’s been in Dragonspine for as long as he has, if he was found dead outside of his lab- or suddenly disappeared, the first person to blame would be the Fatui.

- “But Flurp! what about the stuff you mentioned earlier, with Senora’s attack and the Fatui always going after the traveler?”

- context is key. The traveler is a traveler, and Venti was a necessity to achieve their goal. The traveler is also a huge threat to what they are trying to do, since the Fatui have probably heard of their accomplishments. Them attacking Venti was inevitable, no matter the strain it would cause. The fact that the traveler was there as well was merely coincidence in my opinion

- again “leave no trace” means the intent was that both the Traveller and Venti weren’t meant to survive. This is important because if the traveler disappeared, they would have vanished shortly after finishing what they had to do in mondstadt and thered be no reason to suspect anything had happened to them, just that they had moved onto Liyue.

- Venti would pose risk, but again, the pros outweighed any risk it could have posed to their relations.

- with the Fatui regularly attacking the Traveler, again, that’s easy to clear up and would be difficult to pin on the Fatui, assuming how long it would take to realize they were gone (because despite helping so many people, its still natural to assume they’ve just travelled elsewhere)

- Albedo on the other hand, is technically a legal official, because of his high rank in the knights. He is also only ever really found in Dragonspine and Mondstadt the city. And he is well familiar with the dangers of Dragonspine, so if he were to die there it would be assumed to be either at the hands of the Fatui, or one of his own experiments.

- Thus attacking him is very high risk(unlike the traveler), and since he has nothing to do with their plans, low reward(unlike Venti).

- So most likely he doesn’t needlessly interact with the Fatui, but should an experiment need to expand into the space of one of their camps, it’s likely he would need some kind of documentation to do so. At the same time, Albedo himself would also not be able to harm the Fatui who frequent the mountain. I TOOK WAY TO LONG TO EXPLAIN THAT UGGGGHHHHHHH anyways

- So set the stage, Childe is visiting Dragonspine, right? And he hears from whichever Fatui Camp he happens to stop in about the one Knight of Favonius that they keep seeing around Dragonspine, the one who just last week came to them with a stack of documents saying they would have to move their camp, it’s annoying but they have orders not to attack him.

- and then there’s Childe, who’s been living in Liyue, surrounded by people who basically fear Dragonspine as if its some kind of deadzone, and he just assumed that for anyone not from Snezhnaya, thats exactly what it was. He assumed nobody but the Fatui would dare even visit there, let alone be there as frequently as whoever this person was.

- And he’s got to be pretty important for there to be orders not to attack him, right? - cue Childe’s unique brand of curiosity, so he asks more, apparently the fellow has a geo vision, and had been spotted taking down or even just lurking by a number of Dragonspine’s dangers as though it was merely routine - cue flashback to when he first met the traveler, instantly hesitant, hostile, and potentially even afraid towards him as soon as he realized he was Fatui, even before revealing himself as a harbinger.

- so what was it about this guy that made him so convinced he could walk into a Fatui camp alone, order them around, and still walk out alive. Even Childe could admit how underhanded the Fatui were at times, their true orders could have been anything

- He’s not just going to leave now, no. So he asks more questions and figures out that they did at one point scout out his lab while the Knight was out, and give him the location. He’s a harbinger, what are they gonna say “sorry sir, can’t tell ya” no, these bitches see him with the same amount of fear they’d have for Dotorre or Scaramouche or La Signora or any of the others- you don’t just tell a harbinger “no”

- So anyways Childe decides to check it out

- in the case that Albedo’s mid experiment in his lab when this happens, he’ll probably assume it’s a Knight, since the Fatui haven’t tried anything in quite some time and would just send off a quick “I am in the middle of an experiment right now, I would prefer not to be disturbed” - and Childe would laugh at his voice because let’s be honest, he thinks of himself as a Chad and it just sounds “weak” to him, and then the scenario leads into what would happen even if he wasnt mid-experiment

and now a look into Albedo’s perspective

- let’s assume that the Knights heard about the Traveler’s role in what happened in Liyue, since it’s kind of common knowledge that Childe was the one who did it, and the traveler doesn’t exactly try to hide that he fought Childe. So considering how often the knights and the Fatui clash, and what happened with Signora, they would likely ask the traveler about it, in order to be better prepared, and for that same reason i feel like the traveler would tell them some of it.

- so in this situation, it’s likely that Albedo would recognize him and likely know an amount of his combat abilities, and the thing with the fake seals of permission/Osial, but I don’t think the Traveler would have given told any more than that

- so here’s Albedo, surrounded by Fatui camps, knowing that he knows more about this Harbinger than the other thinks he does and assuming that Childe knows more about him himself, but just how much does he know.

- it’s the first time one of the Fatui has come to his lab in- he doesn’t know how long (other than the occasional instance of a wounded member risking the encounter in a moment of desperation. He’s observed that those who wield hydro have never been present in any of these instances, and are most likely designated as healers, but he isn’t in the best position to find out.) - and the fact that the first Fatui to come to his camp(out of anything other than necessity) is a Harbinger, is certainly very off putting, as he knows that Childe most certainly has the ability to change the orders of the Fatui around him whose cooperation with him is something that he recognizes as very fragile

- and he knows it’s unlikely, in the back of his mind he keeps recalling that this specific Harbinger is the one who resurrected a dead god for the purpose of destroying a city (flashback to the famous “if I destroy Mondstadt” line) but he reminds himself that it’s highly improbable and thus illogical to jump to that conclusion, but he is nonetheless very on edge with Childe’s presence

- However, as with the rest of the Fatui, his hands are legally tied, and unless Childe moves to attack him, any move he makes would only serve to reflect on the rest of the knights

- As such neither would attack the other in this scenario, though Childe would very much want to, and Albedo would very much be prepared to. - and both of these people are very observant (Albedo in the general sense and Childe in the ‘reading body language for combat’ sense) so both of them are completely aware of that, though Albedo would probably acknowledge that it may just be a result of his own paranoia

- However, unless Childe has orders otherwise, he tends to approach interactions with a more amiable attitude, extending his hand and introducing himself as “Childe,” less flamboyant than normal, because yes he’s extra, but not an idiot, he’s not gonna say “hey girlie, hold still” when the guy obviously has his hand tensed like that, “discretely” ready to reach for whats assumed to be a weapon, a melee one based on the position, sword or polearm probably

- Albedo, isn’t really one for pleasantries though, he has a number of things he still needs to do, and he does not want this Harbinger in or nearby his camp. “I’m aware” he says, giving his full attention, so as not to be caught off guard, and to get this over as quickly as possible. “I assume you have some purpose behind this visit. I am rather busy at the moment, so i would prefer that we keep this interaction brief.”

- and Childe is a little shit who still doesn’t know how to associate violence and hostility with any kind of bad vibes so he just laughs and holds up his hands “relax relax, I’m not here on business, no need to be on edge, right?”

- But Childe has a tendency while speaking to, knowingly or unknowingly, give his words a rather ominous tone. That and the fact that Albedo is in his lab, one of few places in Dragonspine where any misfortune that might befall him could be pinned on his own experiments keeps him from letting down his guard just yet.

HOWEVER i cant do dialogue... and this isn’t technically a fanfiction so i can summarize-

- Childe is basically all like “so why the shit are you in dragonspine comrade? i thought yall hated it”

- and albedo is all “experiments and this is where my lab is, is ” but like- not key details cuz he isnt going to reveal stuff to the fatui

-and Childe basically be like “ why up here, isnt there other places,” cuz he legit doesn’t get it. He gets that his mindset isn’t the norm, so he’d assume Albedo would want to do anything to avoid Dragonspine and its dangers like what seems to be the norm for what most people hes interacted with have generally agreed

- and Albedo says some flowery words for like oh “In the pursuit of knowledge if one allows themselves to be dissuaded by potential dangers, then they will find it quite difficult to progress beyond that which is already known”

- which, is important cuz it reflects Childe’s mindset on getting stronger, so he’s like yeah, checks out, and being the extroverted shit he is, he has the guts to ask “aren’t you gonna ask why im in dragonspine?” or something because honestly he likes talking about himself, and thats a topic that doesnt have to do with the fatui so it’s an easy way to make conversation.

- and Albedo, who has by now slightly relaxed just enough to resume preparing the experiment he was preparing before Childe came in. and all passive aggressively is like “The same as the rest of the Fatui, most likely. Now if you don’t mind I do have a number of experiments to conduct and I’m afraid it can get rather dangerous, so it would be best that you take your leave now”

- and Childe gets the message that he’s essentially being told to fuck off but he’s also cheeky as shit and absolutely loves to test his luck so he’d be all “I thought you said not to be dissuaded by potential dangers” sounding all proud of himself for using the other’s words against him

- and Albedo doesn’t have time for this so he just turns back towards Childe, same tone and same face as before, and repeats “it would best that you take your leave”

- Now Childe doesn’t see this as a challenge persay, but he sees how easily it can turn into one, and speaks the two cliche words “make me”

- but Albedo is also a little shit and just turns to resume his experiment, letting out a sigh “Stay if you’d like. I didn’t consider this possibility but I may have to request my lab be made off limits to the Fatui. A shame, I didn’t plan to return to Mondstadt for quite some time”

- and Childe, he’s decently smart- and he knows a number of things, 1 the other harbingers are gonna be pissed if they find out he caused more work for them again, 2 this individual is interesting and he very much wants the opportunity to fight them in the future, and 3 he’s not involved in politics and should Albedo follow through, the Harbingers wouldn’t give 2 shits if he asked them to try and get the change reversed.

- and so he leaves, but he’ll be back

- Albedo’s threat may have given him the upper hand for now, but it also served as a challenge he wouldn’t forget. - of course it’s not really that big a deal though, just if he’s ever in Dragonspine again and there’s nothing nearby to kill, he’d keep it in mind, and hey, best case scenario he can get more information to contribute to the Fatui

OKAY

- so now that Childe is gone and Albedo is able to reflect on the interaction, at first he’s just relieved nothing bad happened

- within the following day he reflects once again, deciding that the Harbinger most likely wasn’t lying about his intentions, he truly did seem seem to merely have been curious as he had claimed

- in hindsight he also realizes that conversing with him may also allow him to confirm or deny a number of the theories he had on the Fatui, or perhaps raise more questions for him to look into that he had not yet considered... or at least it could as long as he was careful about how he asked.

- AND THUS there a few more meetings, many are purely conversational, each trying to get knowledge from the other while being fully aware that the other is trying to do the same - not the type of battle Childe is used to, and it does get boring at times, but it’s all part of the game so he persists

- and eventually, as Albedo recognizes this as a regular thing, he begins enlisting Childe’s help in a number of experiments. Just figuring that since he’s doing an experiment and Childe is there regardless, it’s the most efficient option. That and it keeps the more dangerous questions to a minimum, often redirecting the questions towards alchemy, a much safer topic that he does not need to step so carefully around in order to discuss.

- There comes a point where Childe decides to point out the fact that Albedo most often has him help out with combat-requiring aspects of his experiments, and questions why

- Albedo, figuring it was obvious, reminds him of the conversation a few visits ago, where Childe mentioned his drive to get stronger, and(to requote) said that if he didn’t feel these opponents were sufficient to increase Childe’s strength, he could always bring in a couple Oceanids to fight. He then points out afterwards that ruin guards are a bit easier to fight with a bow

- Mixed responses from Childe including but not limited to - quickly refusing in the language of hydro vision panic, followed quickly by - oh, so he’s been trying to help this whole time, to- - how the fuck would he bring Oceanids to Dragonspine, is that even possible? - followed by curiosity

- and so he brings up the point that he’s never seen Albedo fight, which is a shame. “If you can’t take them down on your own just say so, no need to make excuses.” because heck yeah he’s going to taunt him, I mean this is Childe

- which of course Albedo returns with “If you want to see me in combat, follow your own advice” because of course, by now he knows about Childe’s combat obsession, like you don’t need to know him that long to figure it out, its kind of obvious.

- but he recognizes the intention, so he finishes what he’s doing checking what he needs for his future plans before exiting the lab, Childe following behind him, eager to see his future opponent in action

- so albedo goes to a ruin guard/grader/hunter(one of those), because otherwise it’s hilichurls or abyss mages and he knows enough to be able to tell that’s not exactly the kind of opponent Childe meant, and he would prefer not to have the topic brought up again, if he knew how to avoid it.

- so Childe stands back and Albedo, who is well accustomed to having to defeat the enemies in Dragonspine in order to get components for his alchemy knows exactly how to kill this bitch cuz honestly, the number of these guys he’s probably killed for research purposes is astronomical, so it’s done rather quickly and methodically, as if just another part of routine, exactly the way that it had been described when Childe was first asking the Fatui at that one camp about the alchemist.

- And that interest/intrigue that had started in the side of Childe’s mind and grew over time into one of the reasons(tho not the main reason) that he would often go to Dragonspine... it multiplied exponentially

- cue a few more visits and a new turning point occurs

Klee

- Childe comes to visit, and upon arriving at the lab he sees a child

- cue Childe approaching again, amiable grin on is face “and who’s this young lady” - because it’s literally canon that he’s good with kids

.....

- but Klee isn’t any kid

- and Klee was there for the briefing so she has just as much information on Childe as any of the other higher ranking knights - and only that much information

- a short time later they’re cleaning up the scattered remains of what was Albedo’s last experiment, lucky that the explosion was set off near the entrance so the damage wasn’t too extensive

- “Please don’t tell Master Jean, Dodocco said he was sorry”

- Cue Childe’s “I’m not a bad guy... okay I’m kind of a bad guy” quote - “but I mean no harm, I’m a friend of Albedo’s”

- and Albedo’s standing there like when I agree to that but he wants to see how this plays out

- and I’m really unfamiliar with Klee’s characterization, but you get the point Childe is canonically god at kids, he’s gonna learn that Klee’s basically Albedo’s little sister, Klee’s gonna get attached to him and remind him of his siblings back home, Childe’s interaction with Klee is basically what gets Albedo to start actually somewhat trusting Childe as opposed to just using him from a metaphorical distance and subtly helping in ways that wouldnt really negatively impact the knights

- and now that hes no longer actively distrustful his mind is more open to actually becoming attached, as he now begin to recognize that that which he initially believed to be mere manipulation tactics was actually just... Childe being genuine, or as genuine as a person can be in their situation

OKAY OKAY OKAY NOW THAT ALL THAT IS ESTABLISHED I CAN GET INTO THE DYNAMIC

- so theres the obvious things i already mentioned, like their mutual extreme drive to improve in their respective fields that separates them from others, even within their own respective groups/organizations which already(to an extent) separate their members from most others

now lets talk about this point specifically

- both Childe and Albedo are capable of helping each other grow in their respective fields.

- two things that have the potential to cause Childe trouble and lessen his combat ability and the problems with his delusion and his foul legacy transformation

- these two things are things likely unlike anything that Albedo has been able to study before (tho delusions he might have some experience with- but it’s unlikely) and it would likely be able to expand his knowledge, were he given the opportunity to experiment them, while simultaneously helping childe improve his strength

HOWEVER

- both of them know just how fragile the relationship(whatever it is) between them is, how quickly tensions can shift and orders can change, so in order to protect both the other and themselves they both understand that actually going through with this wouldn’t truly be safe and both sides could get in trouble for it

- because no matter what they do there will always be a constantly present risk hanging over their heads, but ill come back to that

- Dragonspine - in a lot of Albedo ships, the other character has to go through the effort of going to Dragonspine, which tends to serve as an obstacle for the relationship to be overcome (exception of sucrose and... idk do people ship him with Timeus? just in case, recognizing them both as potential exceptions) - However, in the case of Childe, who legitimately enjoys coming to Dragonspine, he wouldn’t hesitate to visit Albedo - with most it becomes “wow, i haven’t seen Albedo in a while, gee, i wish he’d come down the mountain, nonetheless i am a good lover so i shall make the harsh trek to see my beloved” - with this bitch Childe tho it’s more like “oops, feelin’ homesick, Imma see how Albedo’s doing, hope he’s made progress, wonder if Klee will be there” or “Wow I haven’t seen Albedo in awhile. Finna finish up these fatui duties real quick and head over, if i say im checking on the Fatui stationed there, I dont even have to ask to go on leave” (he gets in trouble for not officially asking for a day off anyways)

-anywho, Childe is largely used to interacting with the Harbingers, who always seem to have some other secret second layered plan of sorts that he’s not always informed about (ex: him being intended to fail when he summoned Osial, but being kept in the dark about it), which conflicts with Childe’s relatively straight forward nature - Albedo also possesses the potential to be similar, however he doesn’t often see the need for such things, preferring to be frank about his goals and expectations, so unlike with his fellow harbingers, Childe knows that when Albedo tells him something or asks something of him, what he’s being told is usually exactly what actually is true/intended. And if it’s not, Albedo is the kind of person to explain that it’s something he can’t tell him, which he understands, since he has his own share of things he cant share because of his Fatui alignment.

- there is going to be an interaction where at some point Childe is rambling about his family back home, and Albedo questions him about what they look like, a few days later handing him a surprisingly accurate drawing of his siblings - “I did have to try to check appearance with the traveler but unfortunately they weren’t in Mondstadt, do I do hope there aren’t too many inaccuracies” - Homeboy doesn’t cry(probably) but he gets really fucking close - cue socially isolated Alchemist boy misunderstanding and trying to apologize, which Childe responds to by just hugging him- because both of these boys are touch starved and honestly they fucking need it.

- and now that Childe knows Albedo doesn’t actually have a significant boundary on physical affection, as with most Childe ships... it happens a lot

- headcanon that Childe tends to just lean/rest his head on things like a dog. - additional headcanon that Albedo tends to have a need to keep his hands busy at all times - so just cue the scene where Albedo is working on experiments as usual, Childe watching from behind with his head rested on his shoulder and Albedo just absentmindedly playing with his hair with one hand while the other continues with his work

- also talking with Albedo gives Childe a a lot of harmless fun facts and he loves rubbing it in they’re faces when he gets to correct one of the other harbingers on something because of this

- Albedo does also have a tendency to overthink things though, and Childe’s more straight forward mindset gives a new perspective that helps him work around issues more often than he would have expected

- Also Albedo’s love language is totally words of affirmation (i will die on this hill, he doesn’t even realize he does it probably). So he wouldn’t hesitate to sincerely thank or praise Childe whenever he helps or does something good. And Childe is a Fatui, most of the praise he gets is from the subordinates who admire him yes, but also lowkey highkey fear him, and especially after all of Liyue knows he summoned Osial basically, he is pretty damn starved for affirmation and praise and wouldn’t even notice just how much until Albedo gave that to him. - like Childe is over here melting into a puddle of fluff and Albedo probably wouldn’t even realize what he’s doing, he’s just stating his observations out loud

- Childe and Albedo making a pinkie promise, Childe does the little Snezhnayan chant, and Albedo’s gaze just shifts slowly towards the nearby frozen lake in intense concern

- They go ice fishing with Klee who introduces Childe to fish blasting and it’s a whole new world of possibilities now. Albedo has many regrets.

- the harbingers have all basically figured it out by now and are concerned about security but mostly they just mock him for it - the Fatui stationed in Dragonspine however, probably know because 1 they’ve seen Childe with Albedo almost every time he visits, and Childe brags about it regularly - at this point a majority of them ship it and needless to say Albedo’s risk of death via Fatui has gone down significantly, and it’s had a surprisingly positive benefit on relations between the knights and Fatui overall

- the Knights took a bit longer to catch on, since Albedo isn’t exactly in Mondstadt all that often, but it’s the city of freedom, what are they gonna do? say no? again, they are concerned about security risks, but trust Albedo to recognize what should be withheld.

- also its canon that Childe enjoys cooking, and Albedo has a line about like... let me look it up rq- It’s his “Least Favorite Food” line which talks about how he doesn’t eat at restaurants cuz he has a small appetite and doesn’t want to waste food, which is unfortunate cuz then he has to spend time making his own food - idk its kind of small but i just saw it and thought it was kind of a cute detail

- Childe is a chaotic bean and we love him for it - on the other hand Albedo is more calm and patient, able to put up with this, and realistically, he has enough experience with Klee to not accidentally put him out or down or otherwise dampen his natural personality...... it’s just when the two of them get together that Albedo experiences true fear.

- Albedo: I have an idea for an experiment but the Jean has suggested that the risk is- - Childe: you should do it! - Albedo: -that the risk is too great and has disallowed me from continuing it - Childe: Oh? well she can’t tell me not to it, now can she? - Both: *mutual gremlin noises*

anyway... im probs gonna add more to this later.... I’m just really bad at coming up with ship dynamics- so my main point in this is to get people to realize that it possible and that it could work- because there is... nearly 0 material on it- and i just think it has the potential to be so wonderful but I do not have the potential to make it that way. Like it has the potential for so many different dynamics and iconic moments and theres so many reasonable ways they could meet and just so many possibilities and im just really hoping to show the ship to more people because, y’know, it’s rare and i want them to suffer from the lack of content too, because I’m just a kind person like that.

i would have put it under a cut if i could, but i have no idea how to do that so... apologies...

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brainscrems · 3 months ago

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I mean. The whole “he’s a rapist” thing was a big part of the dems campaign, yea, but I’m not a party line democrat. I recognize these are politicians who are going to do things to keep in power and make shitty compromises they really shouldn’t. I DO, however, have some disagreements with your premises about them. Mostly because, well, the guy with the gun wasn’t ever meant to be a 1-1 metaphor, just an illustrative example, but if we ARE taking it as a metaphor the guy is trump, in this instance. Telling us, by his presence and actions, we both die or one of us dies. But, really it takes away from the fact there are parties (lmao double meaning) with agency besides just us. The main thing though, despite not being a party line dem, is that I DO firmly believe they aren’t fascists and wouldn’t be either, even if they were given the chance. This is for lots if reasons but also because biden HAS been given the chance. The supreme court has legalized the president using the military to murder whoever he wants without consequence and he hasn’t. So. Yk. Also, dems have shown a trend of being more and more antiauthoritarian and more and more left-leaning over the years, slowly but surely. I do realize they’re politicians who make shitty compromises for power, but I fundamentally think that the individuals have some lines they won’t cross because I think they ultimately DO want to help people with their power, even if they’re actually bad at following through.

But, yea, so. I get what ur saying about some things being absolutely unacceptable. The issue is that there are MANY absolutely unacceptable things. And, sometimes, the world around us conspires such that some of those unacceptable things are going to happen no matter what we do. In those circumstances I see it as our duty to minimize the overall number of absolutely unacceptable things that will occur. I don’t think of morality in terms of my direct actions necessarily, because unacceptable things happen regardless of what I do. I think of myself as only responsible for what I have the power to change. And the fact of the matter is that neither of us have the power to change things enough for there to be a president other than harris or trump. And there is insufficient collective pressure for us to give our voices to that would actually make it happen. So. I see myself responsible for the thing I have the power, with collective action, to change. I choose the less bad option. The one that isn’t fascist. This is also because, by choosing this option, I can use my vote to make further progress in the future. Fascism can be stopped by voting, but can’t be removed by it. Knowing I’ll have a voice to keep fighting as well as the fight being easier means I can potentially stop more unacceptable things from happening as time goes on. But, also, I think ur misapprehending the motives of a trump voter. They ARE choosing what they see as less bad, sure, but the issue there is how they quantify what bad actually is, not the concept of choosing the lesser evil itseld. Like. People voting for trump see “bad” as going against fundamentalist christian teachings, yk? The danger isn’t people choosing the less bad option. Even you, in your own eyes, are doing that by potentially voting third party bc, in your opinion, it’s the least bad option of those presented to you. Choosing the least bad is just how moral systems work, because it’s the same as choosing the most good. I don’t mean this in a utilitarian way by the way. That’s abt happiness vs suffering. I mean this in a generalized context of ANY moral system. Any moral system has u choose the option that is least bad under the way it defines bad, which is identical to choosing the most good under the same definitions. That’s just how these things work. The danger ur presenting isn’t really one of utilitarianism but a danger of people choosing flawed methods for measuring what is good and bad about available choices, something vulnerable to happen in your moral system as well.

A quick note abt harris’ comments before I reach my final point: I want to point out that harris unwavering support for israel’s existence, not its actions. She can push devastating sanctions against israel to force an end this genocide without letting it be destroyed. The choice is NOT between them both.

And lastly, I get where ur coming from, I do, but I think ur still missing the contradiction at the heart of ur actions. By contributing in any way, shape, or form, to the US economy you are directly funding genocide through the taxes that go to the US gov. You do have the choice, the difficult choice, but choice nonetheless, to go into the middle of nowhere and start living entirely off the land and refuse to contribute. Your moral system says NOTHING justifies supporting genocide and you do, in fact, have the ability to ensure you don’t. You aren’t making this choice because it is impractical and difficult. Yet, you still won’t vote for harris for the same reason that ur moral system says you SHOULD abandon all of society. That it is unacceptable to support genocide. In the first scenario, despite how hard it is, the only person you would be hurting is yourself. It’s on you and you alone who those consequences fall on. But you won’t do it. In the case of harris, if she loses, the consequences affect the everyone in the US and the entire rest of the world, especially marginalized people. Yet, you won’t do it. Basically, what it comes down to, is you’re following your moral system in regard to harris because it is convenient and easy for you to do and you’re convinced it’s right no matter how many people lose their lives over it. But, when the consequences are more direct and immediate and difficult for YOURSELF, you won’t be willing to make that same choice. This is not moral clarity. This is actions taken for your own peace of mind, rather than ones that actually save lives.

I want to vote for Harris. I really, really want to vote for Harris. I don’t want Trump to win the election. I don’t want to have to live with four more years of ‘what’s this sick fuck going to do to us next?’

But I can’t vote for the continued genocide of the Palestinian people.

I’m going to be contacting the Harris campaign regularly. I’m going to try and plead for them to see sense. But if they won’t, then come November, I’m going to have to vote for someone who has the basic humanity not to support a genocide because it’s politically expedient.

If you want to pick a fight with me, maybe you ought to use that effort on the Harris campaign instead.

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gallickingun · 4 years ago

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ding, dong, the witch is dead!

honestly, who didn’t see this coming? lol. but, anyway. i guess this is goodbye! i’ll ramble more below the cut, but just know that over the next couple of days, i’ll be exporting my blog so i can keep what i want, and then this will be the only post left here.

thank you to everyone who i’ve had the privilege of meeting, and those of you who have been so kind as to leave lovely notes on my works, and interact with me over our silly anime crushes. i really appreciate all the kindness i’ve been shown in the anime fandom. some of my best friends i’ve met through this stupid app, but overall, it’s just not a healthy space for me. i’m not blaming anyone else for what this has become, at the end of the day, i created a hell for myself. i’m just tired of trying to rebuild, rebrand, whatever. i’m just tired.

that being said, obviously not everything can always be so lovely. i don’t care about the discourse or the drama or the whatever, but i’m just hoping this post will bring me some closure, and maybe some for those i’ve hurt, whether accidentally or intentionally. if you click read more and you’re upset with what you see, well, idk what to tell you, friend.

i hate that tumblr can be so insignificant, and yet so all encompassing all at once. yes, it’s “just tumblr” and “it’s not that deep” because at the end of the day, it’s just an app. but, unfortunately, behind this app and these blogs are human beings. which means you create real bonds and real friendships, and real feelings get hurt.

i came back to tumblr during a really sad, dark time in my life. and that was honestly my first mistake. i latched on to whoever would pay attention to me, craving some sort of friendship that i never needed before because i always had someone in real life. but i had just moved away from my family, and was starting the process of what would end up being a notsogreat divorce. i felt alone, and was struggling a lot with my self worth, so instead of choosing to be kind, i chose to lash out. regardless of whether or not that was in private dm’s of those whom, at the time, i’d considered friends, it was still inconsiderate and childish of me. i thought i had to be some hateful version of myself in order to prove to other people that i wasn’t as sad about myself as i truly was. the words i said in private were rude, nasty, and just... not who i want to be? and, without going into immense detail, some of those things i wanted to move on from and no longer felt, were then used as weapons and spread around to others who i never intended to see what i’d said.

please, please, PLEASE — be careful what you say. you really never know who is watching, who is going to manipulate you, etc. what you say holds weight, and even if you don’t intend for it to hurt anyone, even if it’s just venting.. i dunno. just, be careful, okay? check yourself from time to time, friend. make sure that you’re not allowing the overall negativity of the world, of your own mind, of others, to affect you to the point that you don’t recognize yourself.

if you don’t know about my lovely little exposed blog, well, you’d probably be the last to know. at least, it feels that way. although in the beginning maybe it was justified? in some right? i’m not sure anymore, really, but regardless—it turned into some sort of stalking experience. at one point in time, i received 35+ messages telling me how horrible i was, telling me to off myself, telling me that my ex did the right thing by leaving me “on the curb”, etc. my full legal name was being released, with the intent to doxx me i’m assuming? i was being told i was “being watched”, which i fully believe was happening, with the consistency of the updates. people who claim to hate me, still followed me with the intent of watching my every move to “see if i’d changed”. i only have received updates through friends, because to be perfectly honest with you, seeing your worst mistakes splayed on the internet and turning you into some shounen villain is NOT the best thing for your mental health. that, and some of the “truths” were half-honesties twisted because i’d be a hypocrite to post private dm’s debunking these things when i was upset with the very same people for posting such things. i’ve addressed some things, such as the racism, so i won’t go into that again, but some of these other instances are stretches, to say the least.

the irony of the whole thing is not lost on me. the very same people who say i only do things for notes/recognition, are doing those very things. those who say i only care about tumblr, are proving that by running a blog dedicated to exposing some twenty three year old idiot on the internet. those who say i use my friends are the same ones who literally lied to my face so they could collect receipts behind my back and then leave me when it got convenient. those who say i talk to “insignificant” blogs to appear invested are the ones calling those blogs insignificant, i never once believed anyone i’ve interacted with was insignificant, contrary to popular belief. everything they focus on ends up being nothing but hypocrisy in the end.

that being said, obviously i truly hurt whoever all is behind this blog. intentionally, or otherwise. and i know that sometimes what you do/say isn’t meant to hurt anyone, however, you don’t get to control how what you’ve done effects others. all you can do is apologize. but, i know a few of them, because based on the “receipts” they’ve pulled together, the stories are too specific to be anything but those people i’m thinking of. i don’t enjoy blanket apologies, but i’m leaving this hellsite, so it’s all i’ve got left.

i’m sorry for giving you the fuel to your fire for this petty agenda, i’m sorry for creating the monster of myself that allowed you to string along this storyline for what seems to be the better part of a year. i’m sorry that i gave you material to fixate upon, rather than providing you with friendship and something better to focus on. i truly hope you can move on now that i’m gone from tumblr, and honestly i don’t plan on coming back, lol. i genuinely, truly, deeply feel sorry for you, and pray that you can turn this obsessive focus from me to something more productive, something healthier.

the angry part of me wants everyone to realize that the start of this, the matchups/refunds situation, was born from this stalkerish behavior. it has taken me months to put the pieces together, because i truly didn’t think someone who i’d called my friend once would ever string together such a lie, or rather an exaggerated, adulterated truth, but i guess it’s what happened, in the end.

there are a lot of, uh, conveniently timed “releases” of receipts even though they were months after the initial occurrence of the offense. i can’t go into each one, because, frankly, there are too many. i just hope that in the wake of all of these horrible exposes of things i’ve done, others are able to reflect on their actions. telling me one thing while currently speaking to another individual and telling them another, blatantly LYING, etc. are all things that i’ve been accused of, and yet they’ve also been done to me. doesn’t justify what i’ve done, nor am i seeking some sort of absolution, however i just hope that these individuals can see their hypocrisy and move forward.

which leads me to my final point — regardless of how shitty someone is, disallowing them the room to grow, stunting their moral/mental growth, is truly the issue. i am not going to sit here and play holier than thou. i know i fucked up. i was a nasty bitch because i was angry at the world, and then that anger was fueled further by consistent situations where i made the wrong friends at the wrong times in my life. but the fact that this exposed nonsense has been dragging on since... july? august? i’m not really sure, but whatever. since it’s been going on, i have been battling with myself and my ability to do the things i love, talk to those i care about, etc. all because i’m afraid of saying the wrong thing, hurting the wrong person, etc. and in trying to avoid it, i’ve been doing the very same thing i hoped to keep from doing.

i never felt like i could apologize to those i wanted to apologize to because it might be received as disingenuous due to the nature of the exposed blog’s very existence “forcing” me to apologize. don’t get me wrong, some of those who the blog tried to coerce me into apologizing to can suck a dick, because there are people that i truly do not feel deserve my apologies, and therefore, will never get them. but, i do feel bad for those i didn’t get the chance to apologize to that i really wanted to. the last thing i’d want is for my apology to be turned into something it’s not, but hopefully everyone who has been affected by my actions can move on with my absence.

and to those of you who feel the need to make public denounces of my name, i hope it provides you the closure you’ve been seeking. truly, i do. but know that i never did anything i’ve ever done with the intent to get ahead or buy someone’s friendship or take advantage of anyone else. if i truly only cared about the things people say i cared about, i would have never made this blog in the first place. i would have leeched off the popularity of my main blog if popularity was all i cared about. i was searching for a home, which, in the end, i burned down myself. me, joking around about follower count and notes, was literally nothing but sarcastic banter that’s been taken out of context. but, i digress.

i am very thankful for those who i can still call my friends, who are willing and ready to have honest discussions with me about the things i’ve said/done and analyze them and help me move forward. therapy, medication, life choices, etc. all have been rolled into me deciding that i’m done letting a silly little app stunt my growth. if the internet was unplugged tomorrow, i know who i’d have and what would matter. i have REAL LIFE to focus on. i am in love and i have beautiful friendships that i want to foster with honesty and kindness. i can only hope that you all have the opportunity to have those very same things.

will i stop writing? nah, dude. no way. i’m just getting started. in my absence, in choosing to stay away from a place that makes me sick to my stomach with anxiety, i’ve delved into my original characters and i’ve written thousands of words that i haven’t felt the pressure to post about. i’ve learned that just because i’m doing something i love, i don’t have to do it for anyone else.

the internet is a funky place, folks. just be careful who your friends are, okay?

anyway. peace out, girl scouts. i wish you all the best 💖

#morgan.txt #tw mental health #tw suicide mention #tw discourse #tw drama #THAT’S ALL FOLKS! signing off xx

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miminiac · 4 years ago

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Korrasami had build up, just maybe not one you identified with and that’s okay...

I am tired of the LGBTQ+ community hating on Legend of Korra (LoK) for not being gay enough. The critique that there wasn’t enough build up is (1) not productive at all and (2) honestly, not true. There was build up. It may not be the build up every LGBTQ+ person will like, and it may not relate to the experience of every person’s coming out, but it was there. Korrasami was something the creators had tossed around as soon as Book 1 (not that they necessarily had permission to do anything about it). Take this quote from Bryan Konietzko’s tumblr post after the finale aired:

As we wrote Book 1, before the audience had ever laid eyes on Korra and Asami, it was an idea I would kick around the writers’ room. At first we didn’t give it much weight, not because we think same-sex relationships are a joke, but because we never assumed it was something we would ever get away with depicting on an animated show for a kids network in this day and age, or at least in 2010. (link)

The post also discusses how Makorra was never meant to be endgame after Book 1. Again, the time LoK was airing was at a point where states were passing laws to actively prevent gay marriage (LoK ended in 2014, legalization of same-sex marriage by supreme court ruling wasn’t until 2015––context is important). Did they actively write a romance in Books 1 and 2, no they did not. However, as many creators and writers, they let the characters lead them and they discovered that Korra and Asami were more than just friends. Again, taken from the same post:

The more Korra and Asami’s relationship progressed, the more the idea of a romance between them organically blossomed for us

So what we have with Korra and Asami is not a planned romantic relationship from the very beginning, however, the characters have been leading them there since the beginning, whether they realized it or not. Now, I am a big fan of Barthes’ “Death of the Author”, so I 100% percent think that viewers/readers have the ability to inject their own narratives and that multiple narratives can coexist. However, the point of this post is to explain why a critique of “wish they did more” is not productive when it comes to discussion of LoK of a piece of LGBTQ+ media representation. Therefore, I turn to the creators to show that there was intent and there was subtext and build up within Book 3 and 4 (as Bryan discusses in his post, please read in full when you have time).

A lot of Korrasami was hidden in subtext, and that happened because of homophobia within the industry, which still exists today. Content creators of LGBTQ+ media continue to have to walk a fine line. Take Noelle Stevenson talking about Catradora:

My big fear was that I would show my hand too early and get told very definitively that I was not allowed to do this

And like with Catradora (though a little easier since Noelle told viewers that every character is a part of the LGBTQ+ community by default unless explicitly stated otherwise), people saw Korrasami from as early as Book 2 (if not Book 1 on a rewatch).

At the time LoK started airing, I still thought I was straight; I still thought I was straight when I was watching the third season and telling my then boyfriend how Korra and Asami were going to be a couple by the end (literally, when they interacted in the first episode of season 3 while Asami taught Korra how to drive, I turned to him and said it; he said they would never do that and it was a pipe dream). I continued to see Korrasami’s friendship build into something romantic (even if the characters themselves were unaware of it).

Come Season 3 Episode 9, where Asami carries away a helpless Korra, mimicking Katara having carried away a helpless Aang. For those who had watched the original series and were big Korrasami shippers, this scene basically made it canon. It could be argued as the point that maybe the friendship switched to something more romantic. The rest of season 3 and all of season 4 only added moments between these two (side note: I came out as bisexual soon after season 4 started airing, though I had been questioning my sexuality probably since the end of season 3).

Now is the Korrasami relationship perfect, absolutely not. Bryke admits as much, but it was a significant step forward. Again, this happened in 2014, so a lot of narrative within media of states passing laws to discriminate against same-sex couples and deny marriage. The hand-holding scene everyone screams about not being enough. Well, they received plenty of homophobic backlash from that.

The critique that they didn’t do enough is not productive. It is a critique that could be said about most main-stream LGBTQ+ media. I get that we are tired of scraps; I get that we are tired of having to read between the lines because creators are still afraid to come out and say it (pun intended). However, to critique LoK as “not being gay enough” ignores the context in which it was created and what that representation meant to many of the viewers (like myself) who were discovering themselves and their sexuality at the time.

Avatar: the Last Airbender (ATLA) was made for 8-13 year olds (from season 1), and I would argue that LoK was made for that same group of people, who would have then been 14-19 years old when LoK first aired. Thus, LoK was being watched by those entering high school and college––a time of self-discovery.

Additionally, a critique that LoK doesn’t do enough leads to an idea that there is “a right way” to create a LGBTQ+ relationship, which I would argue is harmful to the community at large. If you did not identify with Korra’s coming out, that’s completely valid. If you did not identify with the way the Korrasami relationship progressed, that is also valid. But you cannot invalidate the relationship of Korrasami, as a relationship built off a friendship and mutual respect that blossomed by into something more. The relationship was not sexualized with wistful glances and blatant sexual tension, instead, it was built on a friendship and respect for boundaries.

Again, multiple narratives can be drawn given each viewer has a unique set of experiences. One such reading could show that Asami was more in tune with her feelings for Korra than Korra was about her feelings for Asami. And, instead of flirting non-stop with Korra, Asami respects Korra’s space (though we all saw her check out Korra’s back muscles) and recognizes that Korra has a lot on her plate being the avatar, a relationship is not something on the forefront of her mind. It is only after defeating Kuvira (and the healing/growth from a few episodes prior in "Beyond the Wilds”) that Korra is able to truly understand her feelings to Asami, suggesting they take a trip together––just the two of them.

Now, you may not identify with that type of coming out, but other people do. And to argue that “LoK didn’t make Korrasami explicit enough” undermines the experiences of those in the LGBTQ+ who heavily identified with Korra’s experiences and her coming out.

Holding LGBTQ+ media to this higher standard is inherently toxic. I would like to believe that these creators are coming from a good place with good intentions. There is nothing toxic or abusive in the way Korrasami is portrayed. There is nothing unrealistic about the way their relationship progressed throughout the series. It was not a fan service––it was the natural progression of the characters.

And let’s not forget that Korrasami is not only confirming a relationship between two women, but it is also two women of color. Now, it may not seem like a huge deal within the contexts of the Avatar World, but it is important to remember the context of where this show was airing.

There are things we can critique LoK on. It isn’t perfect. We can discuss the hiring of white voice actors (as a way to hold new media that is being created or will be created accountable, not as a way to just hate on LoK); we can discuss the voices within the writers room and the lack of diversity there. These are critiques that can be made of ATLA and LoK and countless of other media produced. This is a valid critique when used constructively. It is not meant to tear down an entire piece of media and everything that it has done for various communities, but rather to point to a flaw within the way media is being produced and the racist, sexist, and homophobic systems in place that determine what and how media is produced.

If we are to critique, we could look to reimagining how we create and consume media, not tearing down media that has already been produced and stands in a pivotal spot of the community. As Audre Lorde says:

For the master's tools will never dismantle the master's house.

If we are continually operating within the systems of oppression, we will never truly be able to dismantle them. Thus, to operate within the institutions of Nickelodeon, Netflix, Disney, etc. is to be beholden to the rules and constraints of a moderate, heteronormative, sexist, racist society. If creators stray too far from that line too quickly, there will be backlash. The perfect LGBTQ+ representation cannot exist while made within these institutions.

I would like to mention this statement is not to say that we cannot critique or boycott movies or shows that are performative in their diversity. There is no excuse for Hollywood after the successes of Black Panther (2018) and Crazy Rich Asians (2018) (and others) to not fill the crew and writers with the same representation being shown on the screen. We can, and should, hold production companies accountable––and given the internet, it is something we can do even early on in the production process.

I have gotten a little off track, but my point is, think about your critiques. Really ask yourself if it is a productive critique, or if it is critique that actually harms or is toxic to the community. Critiques are hard, I understand that. When we first start to think critically, it is easy to just jump on these “low hanging fruit” type critiques. It takes practice and comfortability learning and expanding your world view to construct a critique that looks at context from various point of views and experiences.

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nezumiismissing · 4 years ago

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Control Through Culture and the Lack of It

Ok so before we get started here I would like to just give a big thank you to everyone who came to my panel during the convention all the way back in September and listened to me ramble out the first draft of this! We had some great discussion and everyone brought up great points that all came together to make this post happen, and it wouldn’t have been nearly as good without all of your input! I also profusely apologize for taking this long to get this done, but sometimes you have 18 college credits and 30 hours a week of work that have to come first! Now, on with the topic:

When we look at the city of No.6, we see a world that appears, for the most part, free of any defining cultural characteristics. It would appear, in fact, that as part of the city’s construction, what we would normally associate with such a society’s culture has been purposely removed as a factor in the citizens’ lives. The “removal” of culture as a contributing factor in the city of No.6 is highly effective in what it was meant to do; separating citizens from the “other” while reinforcing the identity of citizenship and treating it as not only a good thing, but the only acceptable way of being. In the minds of the citizens, this is a functional system, as they are the ones who have benefited from it, and they are able to live comfortable lives free of the suffering that is inflicted upon “others”, creating the sense that despite their internal differences, they still constitute a distinct group. But while at the citizens’ level they have been chosen as existing on the top, the picture is much different for those ruling the city. While the nonexistence of culture functions as a way to dehumanize outsiders and reinforce No.6′s position as superior (ie. it does not need culture to be a complete society), it also serves as a highly efficient way of making sure that the citizens are also unable to truly empathize with and care about the other citizens, or any other humans for that matter. Because the city is all they know, and they have been conditioned to not be able to understand anything outside of that context, the “othering” of those outside the walls by the citizens and No.6’s government becomes that much easier, as the understanding of “citizen” to those in the city is equivalent on some level to their understanding of being human, making anyone outside of the citizen category not only lesser, but also not fully human, and justifying the violence used against them for the purposes of supporting and expanding the city. In a less explicit way this is also functioning within No.6, as citizenship is viewed as a single, mostly homogenous group, and so it becomes impossible to view the lower classes as being treated unfairly. In their eyes, citizenship is equivalent to safety from injustice, and so any violence or mistreatment experienced by a citizen is justified based on their perceived noncompliance with the city’s norms.

By removing culture entirely from the picture, No.6 not only limits what its citizens are able to express in terms of art and politics, but also in their own self-expression and understanding of the human experience. This is probably most clear with Safu, who at the beginning of the story shows an almost complete inability to recognize and express basic human emotions in a way that would be seen as appropriate and useful to the average person reading/watching the story. This type of behavior, shown more subtly by several other characters throughout the story, distances us from them. While the lack of any existing social norms would usually allow space for us to impose our own norms onto the city, which in many cases is what happens, these micro level interactions, instead of coming off as a blank canvas for us to fill in, instead are just off-putting and strange, completely distanced from what we would recognize as a normal interaction, and that distance is perhaps the clearest example of culture we get to see in the story, as it reflects a set of norms that is completely separated and distinct from what we are used to seeing.

No.6 as an entity exists to alienate its citizens from the rest of the world, positioning them as existing “elsewhere”, and as being “other”, with No.6 existing as the “real” world. However once we, and Shion, are removed from this context, first through his meeting with Nezumi and again when he moves to West Block, we see that while No.6 exists as a template upon which to place our own social structures and systems, it is the “elsewhere” and “other” that I think ends up being more relatable to most of us. Even if we haven’t lived in extreme poverty or experienced much in the way of suffering, the West Block is a world that, more than anything, feels human. There is culture in the West Block; we see the food people eat and what an average day looks like for those who live there. We understand the issues that they face on a daily basis because they are concrete; hunger, violence, homelessness, much different from the highly technical and abstract problems facing those within the walls. There is diversity among this group, but there are still norms in place (no matter how questionable) that hold it all together in a way that feels organic and far removed from the isolated, expressionless world of No.6.

So, it should also be stated at this point that when I reference No.6’s “removal” of culture, this is not an entirely accurate description of what is happening. At its core, culture is simply social aspects of a group that differentiate it from another group, and that is something that can never be fully and purposefully removed. But what the city does do in order to replicate this effect is remove other groups as a point of comparison, leaving only one culture to be learned, accepted, and practiced. We can say that No.6 has no culture only because the citizens do not perceive that other people live any differently than they do. And as we see with Safu’s travels to No.5, as well as our own experiences learning about the city, the realization that other ways of living do exist completely shatters the illusion of No.6 as a perfect society, making its issues immediately clear. No.6 does have a culture. It is a culture of authoritarianism, nationalism, and isolationism. The city is to be worshipped and given absolute loyalty, to the point that social activities not in the city’s interest come with harsh punishments, and knowledge of anything outside of the city is limited only to those who have demonstrated an extraordinary level of commitment to the project, intentionally or not. While social norms and laws are generally viewed as overlapping but distinct, with many norms not legally enforced and many laws viewed as universal rather than cultural, in No.6 there is no such distinction.

So where do we, the reader/watcher, fit into this equation? I mentioned at the beginning that the lack of easily identifiable culture in No.6 is what makes the city and the story easily relatable to us, as we are able to layer our own culture and ideas on top of what is otherwise a blank city. But if No.6 does have a culture as described in the last paragraph, then where does that leave us? Now the easy answer here is that in recent times (including when the novels were originally written) many places around the world have faced an increase in the types of ideologies that make up No.6, and our viewing No.6 as a reflection of our own society shows an understanding (either implicit or explicit) that this shift in dominant ideology is occurring in the real world, that authoritarianism is still a prevalent part of our lives. But that answer is no fun, and is actually extremely depressing, so I’m going to point out some other aspects of the relationship between No.6 and our own world as well.

Although the culture of No.6 does exist, it isn’t blatantly discussed or shown in a way that most people would traditionally associate with “culture”. We don’t generally treat government and political ideology as part of a society’s culture, as so much of our everyday lives is determined by norms and practices that aren’t necessarily directly dictated by political systems. This is why No.6, despite having such a strong presence, also feels so blank. It looms so large over the events of the story and yet, once we are outside of it, we see that it has basically no impact on everyday occurrences outside of its walls. Unlike the West Block, where we see so many of the things we associate with culture; food and music and marketplaces and so on; No. 6 just doesn’t really have any of these, and what does exist doesn't really have a distinct form separated from any other modern industrialized nation. It is easy for us to imagine then, that perhaps the people in No.6 live similarly to us, that they share many of our values and understandings of the world, and have the same everyday concerns that we have. So much of what we use to understand a society is just not mentioned that the story basically forces you to impose yourself and your worldview onto it. It forces you to take part in the story and forces the story to take a shape that makes societal critique impossible to ignore.

On the other hand, besides just having a feeling of being more “alive”, the West Block also has its reasons for being the more relatable of the two places, at least for a solid chunk of the people who are going to be experiencing the story. Despite the fact that the structure of No.6 is meant as a representation of the issues found within the modern industrialized world, the position from which we are seeing those issues is skewed. I have touched on this in my post about Getsuyaku, and will definitely go into more depth on it in the future, but outside of Lost Town, No.6 exists as an upper middle class utopia only. There is no room in their world for regular working people, or those framed as being “unproductive” in society, such as the elderly. While wealth is a complicated topic when talking about No.6, class is not, and it is clear that the ways in which class manifests are strikingly similar to the real world. So where does West Block fit into this? Well, the reality is that a significant percentage of the people reading or watching No.6 do not belong to the upper middle class, or even the middle class. A lot of us are working class or poor (or both depending on how you categorize classes), and even if the West Block is a somewhat extreme example, those people, along with those in Lost Town, have far much more in common with us than those living in the regular districts of No.6 or in the gated area of Chronos. So while the city may reflect our own society in significant ways, and accurately describes the “culture” of that society, it only does so through the lens of someone who is successful within that structure, leaving it “blank” and without culture for those of us who have not had such an experience and view that position as something completely distanced from ourselves, or that we only encounter from a subordinate position.

In the world of fiction, there basically are no rights or wrongs when it comes to writing culture. That’s kind of the point of fiction. And to a certain extent every story is going to have some aspect of the society it was written in in it, because culture is just an unavoidable part of every person’s life that dictates everything about how they see the world. But through the story of No.6 we get to see that influence from several perspectives, both within and outside of the story, showing not only a reflection and critique of our own society, but the ways in which the positions of the characters and ourselves changes how we perceive that reflection. Ultimately every society is controlled through culture, and systems are in place to in turn control how culture functions, creating an endless loop of changes and reinforcements. To, in any concrete way, remove culture from a society is a fundamentally impossible task, and yet the illusion of removal is very much real, created not through an active effort of removal, but through the elimination both of comparable groups and the perception that any culturally significant differences may exist within the original group.

I could probably go on, but I’m getting away from the main topic, so I’ll stop here for now. The topic of culture in No.6 is really fascinating and something I definitely want to write more on in the future, but it will have to wait until I finish a couple of my other drafts first! So like always thanks for reading if you made it all the way to the end, and I will hopefully have at least a short thing done in the next couple of weeks or so!

#no.6 #no. 6 #no.6 analysis #long post #hello!#i finally return!#yes this was supposed to be done in September please do not remind me!#my brain would not shut up until this was finished though so here we are #not sure how im feeling about this one?#it took so long to finish that I think I lost most of the original concepts I had #so its a bit all over the place #but got to touch on some cool topics so thats all that really matters!#thanks again to the folks at the con last year!#could not have done this one without your input!#original

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raleighcarrera · 4 years ago

Text

after class

ride or die | colt kaneko x mc (ellie wheeler)

‘part of me wishes things were different. we could’ve met at college… pushed each other in the classroom…’

colt & ellie are classmates at langston. for @rodappreciationweek day 2 (colt day!)

tags: @choicesarehard, @lovehugsandcandy, @pixeljazzy, @theeccentricbibliophile, @troublemakerinspace, @dancingboba, @zigtheeortega

~10.5k words | M (18+)

colt surveyed the classroom as he stalked through the front door, late, his eyes eventually coming to rest on the last available desk. naturally, it was in the front row of the room, worsening the low level of irritation he already had simmering.

great. just what he’d been hoping for, at 8:30 in the morning, on the first day of the fall semester. he huffed as he made his way over to it, dropping unceremoniously into the chair. so much for coasting through syllabus week, or sleeping through the morning classes his advisor had recommended. at least he’d made it in before the professor.

he cut a bored glance to the left and caught sight of the girl sitting next to him. she looked way too perky for the early morning hour, sitting up straight in her seat, notebook already open on her desk. the charms on the bracelet adorning her wrist jangled together when she lifted her reusable water bottle to her lips and sipped from the straw.

8:30 AM and she wasn’t even drinking coffee? what a weirdo.

colt’s eyes slid down and lingered on her legs, crossed under the desk. the shorts she was wearing provided ample view of smooth, brown skin, and he smirked at the way she was bouncing her foot before forcing his eyes away. when he looked back up, he noticed she was looking at him, too.

his eyebrows arched, the corners of his mouth quirking upwards. before he could say anything, the professor walked in, pulling the door shut behind her. the girl beside him flushed red all the way to her hairline and averted her eyes guiltily, looking back toward the front of the room as though the lecture had already started.

colt grinned to himself and leaned back in his seat, pleased as punch. maybe this early class wouldn’t be the worst thing that ever happened to him, after all.

“good morning, everyone,” the professor said, dropping her things on the desk at the front of the room and immediately moving to pass out the syllabus, working her way up and down the rows of desks. “i’m dr. morrell. welcome to law and psychology. the purpose of this class is to examine the ways both industries intersect with each other. over the course of the semester we’ll explore issues relevant to understanding human behavior from the perspective of law and psych and the contributions of psychology as a behavioral science to legal issues.”

the girl sitting beside him was already taking notes. colt scanned the syllabus as the professor dropped it onto his desk, grimacing when he caught sight of the grading breakdown. two exams, two papers and a group project? surely no hot girl was worth subjecting himself to that.

“i’d like a few of you to provide some examples of where law and psych intersect so that i can get to know you. who wants to go first?”

out of the corner of his eye, colt saw the girl’s hand shoot up. of course.

“go ahead. what’s your name?”

“ellie wheeler,” she answered, “and psychology often intersects with the law when it comes to false confessions. a majority of false confessions occur because of the psychologically manipulative interrogation tactics police use, like the guilt-presumptive reid technique.”

“very good,” dr. morrell praised. “we’ll be covering the psychology behind false confessions extensively before midterms. anyone else?”

his hand raised before he was even aware of it. “colt kaneko. isn’t ellie ignoring that false confessions are also born from a system that doesn’t take into account dispositional vulnerabilities of suspects? like not requiring a lawyer for juveniles or those with behavioral or personality disorders -- you know, the groups who actually provide a majority of false confessions.”

the professor’s eyebrows raised. colt could feel ellie staring at him in disbelief from where she was sitting beside him. “certainly,” dr. morrell agreed politely, “we’ll be exploring a variety of studies that explain how social pressures, personality traits and potential conduct disorders intersect with police interrogations and confessions. but this is great insight.”

she crossed to the other side of the room to call on another student. colt turned his head and caught ellie’s eye -- she was still glaring at him, looking pissed off and, honestly, even hotter for it.

when he grinned at her, she huffed under her breath, still obviously annoyed. her gaze snapped back to the syllabus, and though he continued to sneak glances at her for the next ninety minutes, she didn’t look his way again.

she hung back to talk to the professor once they were dismissed, but colt wasn’t about to linger in a lecture hall, even if it meant scoring a chance to talk to the only girl who’d actually captured his attention at college so far.

the thought of having to wait until thursday to see her again was... unwelcome. as he made his way to his next class, he wondered why he’d never seen her around before. if she was a psych student it seemed strange that they’d managed to go a whole year without having a class together; the program at langston wasn’t that big, and for most of his freshman year he’d seen the same faces, give or take a few, in each of his classes. now, on the first day of his sophomore year, he’d recognized most of the people in law & psych, too. but not her.

hopefully she’d changed majors and wasn’t just taking law & psych to fulfill a requirement. having her around was going to make the program a lot more interesting -- none of the other people in his courses ever challenged him, and he’d honestly gotten sort of bored picking apart their points all the time. she was a welcome change of pace, and he was surprised to find that he was actually looking forward to her inevitable payback for shutting her down in class.

colt got to his social psych class with enough time to have his pick of the seats. he slipped into the back row and pulled out his phone, scrolling through the messages he’d missed since last night. a few minutes later, the sound of someone pulling out the chair beside him made him lift his eyes, and a wide grin -- one that he knew well was too obnoxious for even the latter half of the morning -- took over his face when he saw who it was that had sat down next to him.

“hey,” he greeted, nodding at ellie. “looks like you copied my schedule.”

she regarded him with barely suppressed disgust. “my advisor picked these classes. i registered late and got locked out of everything.”

huh. that was exactly what had happened to him, but in all actuality, he’d completely forgotten about the deadline to register for classes. “are you new to the program? why haven’t i had any classes with you before?”

she looked at him like he was insane. “uh, it’s my first day? i just started here.”

okay -- that wasn’t exactly fair. like he was just supposed to assume she was a freshman, when both classes he’d found her in were two-hundred level courses? “shouldn’t you be in intro to psych, then?”

ellie rolled her eyes at him. he watched as she pulled a second notebook from her bag, setting it on the desk next to her water bottle. “i have an accelerated course load,” she explained, “i started over the summer. i’m in the pre-law program? you do undergrad in just three years and then law school for the next three. psych is just one of my minors.”

so -- she was brilliant. figures. he’d had a feeling.

“well --”

she turned away as the professor walked in. colt rolled his eyes as he started droning on about the course, walking through the syllabus at an agonizingly slow pace. like he gave a shit. the girl sitting next to him was infinitely more interesting.

“...so our first unit will explore social psychology as it pertains to consumer behavior. can anyone name an example of psychology impacting consumer behavior? let’s see... colt. how about you?”

the sound of his name startled him into paying attention again. “uh... packaging? and presentation. grocery store layouts are designed to push certain products so everything from lighting to shelf position impacts consumers on a psychological level.”

“sure,” the professor nodded, “but what about in a social context? anyone else?”

ellie raised her hand. “there are lots of studies that show salesperson interaction can significantly affect consumer behavior. oftentimes the social pressures of the interaction can impact purchasing behaviors significantly.”

“you’re absolutely right. now, if we expand on ellie’s observation...”

colt looked back towards her and found ellie shooting him a smug, self-satisfied smile. well. if that was the way she wanted to kick off the semester, then... color him even more impressed.

he nodded back at her. game on.

tuesday afternoon came around quickly enough. the class pattern at langston meant that most students had the day off on wednesdays, so colt’s roommate was already pregaming when he got back to the dorm, getting ready to go out later that night.

logan tossed him a beer as soon as he took his jacket off. “hey,” he nodded at him, “there’s a party at backyard tonight. wanna go?”

colt shrugged, cracking the tab on the can and lifting it to his lips for a sip. “i guess. who’s living there this year?”

“i think the lacrosse team,” logan answered, though his voice sounded distracted, his eyes were on his phone. “there’s people going to howl too, though.”

“whatever,” he said, dropping down onto his bed, kicking off his shoes, “we could always start at the bar and go to backyard after. i don’t care.”

a thought occurred to him as he drained the rest of his beer, leaning over to set the empty can on his desk. trying to keep his voice casual, he asked, “do you remember where we used to party when we were freshmen?”

logan lifted his head and smirked at him. “we didn’t used to party anywhere. i went out and you sulked in the room.”

colt rolled his eyes. “i wasn’t sulking.” he just hadn’t wanted to be at school. at all. colt spent most of his freshman year trying to figure out how to get kicked out of college and sent home to l.a., not that it had done him much good.

“if you say so,” logan hummed, setting his phone aside and heading to the fridge for another beer. colt shook his head when logan looked back at him curiously. “why’re you asking, anyway?”

“no reason,” colt answered too-quickly, averting his eyes when logan’s look turned suspicious, “just wondering.”

logan leaned against his desk, his expression morphing into one of disbelief. “dude. come on.”

colt’s jaw clenched as he grit his teeth. then he sighed and said, “fine. there’s a girl in the psych program i wanted to talk to.”

logan’s face split into a boyish, excited grin. “dude,” he said again, but this time he sounded delighted, “seriously? i’ve only been waiting, like, an entire year for this. what’s her name?”

colt rolled his eyes at him. he should’ve anticipated this reaction. “forget it. it’s not a big deal. if we run into her we run into her --”

“colt,” logan sighed, “you know you could just invite her, right?”

“i don’t have her number. and anyway --”

“okay, whatever. we’ll just find her. i think most of the freshmen should be at the rugby party, we can walk there after the bar. dude, this is so awesome. i’ve always wanted to be your wing man.”

“well, can you try to calm down?” he leaned back on the mattress, shrugging his shoulders. “i don’t even think she likes me.”

“yeah,” logan laughed, “i’m sure you were really nice to her.”

“shut up,” colt mumbled, “it was -- whatever. i’m going to take a shower.”

logan’s enthusiasm didn’t waver; if anything, it only got worse as he kept drinking. he bothered colt about what he was going to wear for twenty minutes until colt finally gave in and let logan pick from his shirts.

fortunately, he was at least moderately buzzed by the time they made it to the bar and met up with the rest of their friends. even more fortunately, logan started talking to a girl as soon as they got there and left him alone to first survey the crowd for ellie -- no luck there -- and then start slamming back shots.

he lost track of time talking to some girl who knew a surprising amount about cars and soon enough it was approaching midnight and he was drunk, waiting until logan came up for air from where he’d been kissing the girl he’d met in a corner of the bar to remind him about the party.

“oh yeah!” logan said excitedly, one arm wrapped around the girl’s shoulders. she was leaning on his chest, giggling drunkenly at nothing. “christina’s a freshman, too, she said she’d bring us by. maybe she knows the girl you like.”

“dude,” colt said, shaking his head, “come on.” the small group of people they’d met up with at the bar walked with them to the rugby house, where the guy at the door recognized the girl logan had been making out with and waved them all in without a second glance.

the house was full of people he didn’t recognize, which probably meant that most of them were freshmen or people on the rugby team; painfully loud music made it almost impossible to hear logan, even when he leaned in and screamed into his ear, “is she here?”

colt looked around, but he didn’t see ellie anywhere in the living room. he shook his head. “i’m gonna go get a drink,” he called, weaving through the crowd of bodies and walking off into the kitchen, alone.

he bypassed the keg and went straight for the bottles lining the counter. he was pouring vodka into a cup he’d already half-filled with tequila when someone bumped into him, jostling his shoulder.

colt turned around and came face-to-face with ellie, who was unsteady on her feet, brushing her hair out of her face where it’d suddenly fallen into her eyes. she looked different than she had in class yesterday -- the top she was wearing was low-cut and lacy, her shorts tight and short enough to show off the same long, tanned legs he’d been eyeing in the lecture hall.

she smiled when he finally met her eyes. “oh. it’s you. hi!” she chirped cheerfully, her voice loud and over-excited. the fact that she was being so nice to him meant that she’d probably had a few. her eyes were unfocused as she looked him over, though her gaze sharpened when she stopped on his face again. “what’re you doing here?”

he shrugged, leaning against the counter as nonchalantly as possible. “my roommate wanted to stop in.” colt felt his lips pull into a grin despite himself. “didn’t think i’d see a girl like you in a place like this.”

ellie pouted prettily at him. “what’s that s’posed to mean?”

he laughed. of course she had to be a cute drunk. “you’re just such a goody-two-shoes. i’m almost impressed you made it out at all.”

her arms folded under her chest. colt focused all of his energy on keeping his eyes on her face. “i am not a goody-two-shoes.”

colt took a long sip from the cup in his hand. that he was able to swallow the alcohol straight without gagging immediately proved he was probably too drunk for this conversation. “sure you’re not.”

“i’m not,” she insisted, “i’ll prove it. let’s take shots!”

he glanced down at the cup in his hand, mentally judging how much was left. then, he held it out to her with his eyebrows arched. “okay. if you can finish this you’ll officially have impressed me.”

ellie confidently snatched the cup out of his hand, lifting it to her nose. then she wavered, squinting down into it. “what is it?”

colt grinned at her again. “tequila.”

“it smells like vodka.”

he shrugged. “it’s vodka, too.”

“you’ve been standing here drinking vodka and tequila mixed together? without -- without, like, soda? or juice? you’re a sociopath.”

“look, if you can’t handle it, no worries. maybe we can find you a white claw or something.”

ellie huffed, squinting at him before resolutely lifting his cup to her lips and knocking back the liquid left in it in one gulp.

he pursed his lips together to stifle a smile, and then a laugh, once she started coughing.

“ugh! that is awful,” ellie exclaimed, pushing the empty cup back into his hands, “how can you possibly drink that? no wonder you’re like -- how you are.”

his friends found them in the kitchen before he could ask what she meant. logan clapped his shoulder and asked, “hey, are you ready to go? chase and sean are already at backyard.”

the girl he’d brought with him squealed excitedly when she saw ellie, throwing herself into her arms for a hug. “ohmygod, you should totally come with us!” she exclaimed, “i’ll walk you back later. please, el?”

logan’s face lit up. he elbowed colt hard in the side until colt glared at him and stepped purposefully on his foot.

“sure,” ellie shrugged, “let me just tell my roommate.” she glanced at colt, the corners of her mouth lifting. “i’ll meet you guys outside?”

he nodded, probably faster than he should have. “yeah.” the longer they all stood there, the more likely it was that logan would say something to embarrass him, anyway.

there were people drinking in the front yard when they went outside, but he felt like he could breathe a little easier out of the crowded kitchen and living room. as soon as christina pulled away from logan, he turned back toward colt and asked, “soooooooo? was that her?”

“yeah,” he admitted begrudgingly, “but don’t say anything.”

logan held a hand to his chest, wounded. “it really hurts my feelings that you think i’d be so uncool. dude, i want you to get laid.”

colt rolled his eyes. “i don’t need any help getting laid.” and it wasn’t like he was looking to sleep with her and never call her again.

“i know, but --” ellie and one of her friends came out the front door, walking over as soon as they caught sight of them. the girl ellie had brought with her started talking to christina as logan led the group down the street, and colt was surprised when ellie hung back and fell into step with him, at the back of the group.

“so -- you been over here yet?” he asked, pushing his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans.

“nope. but riya said all the upperclassmen hang out at backyard.”

colt snuck a glance over at her and had to suppress a smile again. “that your friend?”

“uh huh,” she nodded, “we’ve been best friends our whole lives. it was, like, a dream come true when we both got in.”

“cool. well -- backyard is usually pretty fun, but the lacrosse team is living here this year so we’ll have to see if they can hang.”

“who’s your friend?” ellie asked abruptly. when he looked over at her again, he saw that she was staring at logan. he’d recognize the look on her face anywhere. he’d seen it on tons of girls’ faces before.

ellie was biting her bottom lip.

“that’s my roommate,” he answered stiffly. “logan.”

“he’s really hot,” she murmured thoughtlessly, almost to herself. the sound of her voice was soft, each word starting to slur together.

colt rolled his eyes. he quickened his pace to catch up to some of the other guys.

“hey!” ellie huffed, and he heard the sound of her shoes on the sidewalk as she rushed to be beside him again, “wait up.”

the off-campus housing that had always been a party spot had gotten the name ‘backyard’ for said impressive feature; the grass was packed with undergrads when colt and everyone else made their way outside. as soon as they found chase and sean, one of them passed him a lit joint, which he accepted gratefully, thinking there were few things he might’ve liked more, at that moment, than being too high to think about any of the things that were bothering him.

ellie appeared beside him suddenly. “you smoke?”

he stared back at her blankly, and then took another hit. “weed? yeah.”

“oh.” she blinked, looking from him to chase and back again. “can i try it?”

chase shrugged at her. “be my guest,” colt said flatly, passing her the joint and leaving her with the group, walking over to the keg.

logan jogged over while he was filling a cup. colt passed him the first one and went to get another. “so? how’s it going?”

he rolled his eyes. “she’d rather talk to you. it’s whatever.”

logan frowned at him. “i’m obviously not going to --”

“i literally don’t care. it’s fine.” colt walked away before logan could continue. he had only a moment to scan the backyard for someone he actually wanted to talk to before ellie popped into his field of vision again.

“are you mad at me?” she demanded, frowning at him.

“nope.” the girl from howl who’d talked to him about cars for an hour was waving at him from over by the fence. colt pushed past ellie to go talk to her again. “i owe you one,” he grinned when he approached, “you saved me from an unbelievably awkward situation.”

the answering smile she sent his way was wide -- all teeth. “then you should come home with me.”

he blinked. colt racked his brain, trying to remember if she’d told him her name. “do you live on campus?”

she nodded. “in south. but my roommate’ll be sleeping over here with her boyfriend.”

if she lived in south, she was probably an upperclassman. unfortunately, that didn’t bring him any closer to remembering her name.

he squinted at her, then ducked his head, as bashfully as he could manage. “i forgot your name.”

admitting as much was a risk, but it paid off -- she only laughed at him, and then said, “olivia. so? you wanna get out of here?”

more than anything. he nodded, reaching down and threading his fingers through hers. “let me just tell my roommate.”

she let him tug her over to where logan was standing with the rest of their friends. “i’m leaving,” he said, clapping logan on the shoulder. logan frowned at him for a moment before he caught sight of olivia, and then he grinned widely.

“nice. see you later.”

colt nodded at everyone else before they left, pointedly not scanning the crowd for one last glimpse of ellie.

he was a fucking idiot for thinking he should pursue something there in the first place, probably. whatever dumb little crush he had on her because she’d impressed him a couple of times had to go.

fortunately, he’d already found another way to occupy his time -- even if it was only for tonight.

he was late to law & psych again on thursday, and everyone in the room was sitting in the same seats they’d taken on monday -- which meant the only open desk was in the front, again, next to ellie.

she shot him a deeply unimpressed look when he slunk into his seat and dropped his head in his hands. like she had on monday, she seemed wide awake and much too excited; she was drinking water again.

“hi,” she said pointedly, like he was ignoring her or something.

colt arched an eyebrow at her. “hi?”

ellie huffed. “where’d you disappear to on tuesday?”

“uh...” he rubbed at his eyes, still feeling exhausted. “just went back to campus, i guess.”

she looked almost... embarrassed, not that he understood why. professor morrell called everyone to attention before she could say anything, and though he really didn’t give a shit, he still turned back to the front of the room, slumping down in his seat as he went.

he did his best to pay attention for most of class, but found himself zoning out for the next hour -- pretty much sleeping with his eyes open. the only part of the lecture he actually caught was five minutes before class was scheduled to end, when dr. morrell said, “and before we go, i’ll assign the partners and topics for the first project so you guys can get started over the weekend, if you want.”

yeah, that was exactly how he wanted to spend his weekend. he rolled his eyes as she started passing out readings. though he was only half-paying attention, he did realize that she was working her way clockwise around the room... and everything slowed to a stop when she paused in front of his desk and said, “ellie and colt. your topic is false confessions. i look forward to seeing your presentation.”

he probably should’ve seen that one coming. it was par for the course with his life, honestly -- just his fucking luck.

he flipped absently through the reading she’d given them and then sighed, handing it to ellie.

“don’t look so thrilled,” she said as she took it from his hands. “come on. we can work out a schedule for when we’re going to work on this.”

they headed toward the building they had social psych together in, side-by-side. ellie kept her eyes on the reading as they went, and he took advantage of the fact that her gaze was averted to study her in turn, analyzing the expression her face calculatingly.

“i’ve read this study before,” she said finally, “this won’t be that hard. we can split the lit review and then i’ll work on the analysis and you can do the conclusion.”

“okay,” he said, a little startled by the way she seamlessly doled out orders. “sure.”

ellie snuck a glance up at him, then, and he didn’t look away, even when she caught him staring. her cheeks were a little flushed when she drew in a breath and said, “okay. do you want to work on it this weekend?”

“that’s fine.”

they crossed the quad together in silence. as they neared the building their next class was in, she hesitantly started, “so -- your roommate...”

colt tensed, but otherwise didn’t say anything. the expression on his face soured when, a moment later, ellie continued, “is he single?”

try as he might to force his face blank, he could feel his look of distaste twisting further into a scowl. “i guess.” at least he’d been drunk the last time she’d subjected him to this.

ellie either didn’t notice his attitude or didn’t care to comment on it; she breezed right past the dark tone of his voice when she said, “cool, because my friend riya -- from tuesday? -- thinks he’s really cute, and i think they’d be perfect together. but she had this awful breakup last spring and i don’t want to set her up with just anyone, so --”

his sneer cleared as she kept blabbing, and he slowly tuned her voice out in favor of the pounding of his own heart. so she hadn’t been asking for herself.

that was... an interesting development, for sure. for sure.

“colt?” he shook himself from his thoughts and looked back at her. ellie frowned at him, her eyes narrowing. “were you even listening to me?”

“yeah, your friend. bad breakup. high school drama.” he shot her a winning smile as he opened the door for her, following behind her and letting it swing shut in the face of whatever underclassmen were coming in behind them.

“maybe we can all do something this weekend,” she suggested, as they made their way down the hallway to the classroom, “get drinks or something after we work on the project?”

“definitely.” fuck. that answer had probably come too quickly to be considered cool, and it hadn’t gone unnoticed by ellie -- she was looking at him from under her eyelashes, smiling shyly.

she looked really pretty. fuck.

she followed him to the back of the room again even though they were right on time today and there were plenty of open seats. he wondered what the fuck she was doing when ellie slid into the same desk she’d sat in on monday; she clearly wasn’t a back of the classroom type of girl. but here she was.

“give me your phone.”

he startled. “what? why?”

“so i can give you my number?” again, the look on her face seemed to suggest he was the biggest idiot she’d ever had the displeasure of talking to. “how else are we going to find a time to work on the project?”

colt passed it over wordlessly, watching while she plugged her phone number in and then texted herself before handing it back. “thanks,” he said stupidly, with no idea why.

“just try not to ditch me again.” the look on her face had him feeling weirdly guilty, like they’d gone to the party together, or something -- like he hadn’t left her with all of her friends. he suddenly wondered how much she actually remembered, if she saw him leave hand-in-hand with olivia or not.

try not to act like you want to fuck my roommate, he thought to himself, the words on the tip of his tongue.

before he could put his foot in his mouth, the professor called class to attention. he sat in silence for most of the next hour and a half, until he answered a question and ellie said --

“actually, colt’s forgetting that schemas related to behaviors are known as scripts, and a widely different concept.”

“they’re actually not a different concept at all,” colt said, before the professor could correct her, “they’re a deviation of the same concept on a technical level but operate in pretty much the same way where modification and therapy are concerned.”

“colt’s correct,” the professor said, shooting them both a strange look before walking back to the board at the front of the room, “which brings us to next week’s reading by abelson. we’ll be discussing chapter four in more detail on monday...”

he turned and smiled smugly at ellie. she looked just as deeply annoyed with him as ever, seething at her desk.

never one to quite know when to stop, he couldn’t resist leaning in and whispering, “maybe you shouldn’t have skipped intro to psych after all,” gratified by the way her hands clenched into fists and how she stared him down with the dirtiest look she could muster.

suddenly the semester had gotten fun again.

working on their project together went surprisingly well. much better than he had expected it to, given their track record.

but ellie was smart and sharp and witty in a way that felt like something he’d been waiting for without outright searching for it.

admittedly, he’d caught himself staring at her more than a few times, his eyes mapping the curve of her neck when her head bent low into his textbook, which was used, and therefore free game for her to mark up with highlighter.

they were probably sitting too close for the library. all the private rooms were taken when they’d first arrived, so they’d found a table in the upper level of the atrium, and though it was sort of secluded in the back corner by the windows they were far from alone.

but that didn’t stop his mind from wandering.

“look at this study,” ellie said suddenly, sliding a piece of paper under his nose and forcing him to tear his eyes away from the dip of her cupid’s bow, “what kassin says here about compliance will be an important point for us.”

“god, aren’t you tired yet?” he was almost impressed. it’d been hours. “look around. it’s dark out. you have to at least be hungry.”

ellie’s lips pursed into a thin line. she sighed, but begrudgingly admitted, “okay, i’m a little hungry.”

his grin widened, toeing the line between obnoxious and charming he so often straddled. “we made really good progress.” well. she had, at least. “let’s call it for tonight. come on, it’s friday.”

she wavered for another minute, but he knew he had her. it still felt like a victory when she finally nodded. “fine. we did make pretty good progress. maybe we can meet up again on sunday?”

he stared at her as she stretched in her chair, arching her back and raising her arms above her head. “sure. are you going out tonight?”

ellie’s lips twisted into a grimace, and she shook her head. “i wasn’t planning on it. i have a meeting with my advisor early tomorrow morning.”

“on a saturday?” someone sitting at one of the other tables chose that moment to shush them, loudly, and he twisted around to glare at them over his shoulder as ellie packed up her books and stood. he only looked away to follow her out, though she waited until they were in the stairwell to talk again.

“yes, on a saturday. i just want to make sure i’m staying on track.”

colt arched his eyebrows at her as he held open the door to the lobby. “it’s the first week of the semester.”

“well, it doesn’t hurt to be prepared,” ellie huffed, stepping smoothly past his arm and striding to the exit, “school is really important to me.”

“okay,” he said, trying to stifle the smirk that was threatening, “so if you’re such a goody-two-shoes, how’d you wind up missing the deadline to pick classes? doesn’t seem like something that’d just slip your mind.”

ellie’s smile dipped while they made their way back across the lawn. “um.” her voice was suddenly much quieter, and he watched one of her shoulders lift in an unsure shrug before she stiffly continued, “my mom. she’d been sick for awhile, but... over the summer -- she died. i honestly just forgot about registering.”

“fuck,” colt sighed, before he could stop himself and think for a second about what he was saying, “i’m an asshole. i’m sorry, i didn’t --”

“please,” ellie said, already shaking her head, “you couldn’t have known. but... that’s what happened. and i totally had a meltdown when i realized and i seriously almost just deferred a semester to get around it, but i guess everything wound up working out.”

he was surprised to see her sneaking a glance up at him as they walked. immediately, he averted his eyes. “i guess,” he allowed, decidedly ignoring the strange and unfamiliar feeling that was abruptly squeezing his chest tight, “but, still. that really sucks. i’m sorry.”

“don’t be,” she murmured. her teeth sunk into her bottom lip. ellie cleared her throat, her voice a little brighter when she said, “hey -- do you... want to get dinner? um, if you’re not going out or anything.”

as if. she was the only person who’d been able to get him to go out since he fucking came to this stupid school. “yeah. i mean -- i’m not. so that’d be cool.” maybe he still had a shot at impressing her. “actually, can i show you something? do you like tacos?”

“oh.” she looked surprised, both by his agreement and his suggestion, but despite how floored she seemed she still smiled in a way that lit up her whole face, and he was amazed to notice that she had a dimple he’d somehow never seen before right now. “i love tacos.”

ellie didn’t say another word until they were both sitting down on the edge of the roof, styrofoam takeout boxes balanced in their laps, so he had no idea what her opinion was on any of it.

she’d remained coy while he led her to his favorite off-campus hole-in-the-wall, quiet when he’d dragged her back to the biology building and forced her up five flights of stairs, silent save for a pointed raised eyebrow when he shoved his shoulder into the door marked roof access - custodial staff only until it popped open and they emerged out onto the roof, easygoing but still a little cautious when he led her over to the edge and sat down with his legs dangling over the side of the building.

now, she had pineapple juice dripping down her thumb as she cradled her al pastor in her hands, giving him carte blanche to stare at her while her own eyes looked out at the city.

he was desperate to know her take on it all, and frustratingly close to demanding well?! before she eventually spoke up and put him out of his misery.

“this is a great view.”

colt finally diverted his gaze to his own tacos. “don’t tell anyone about it. it’s a secret.”

“that’s a funny way of saying breaking and entering.”

he rolled his eyes at her, gently shoving his shoulder into hers. “what they don’t know won’t hurt ‘em. besides, we’re not doing anything wrong.”

ellie shrugged her shoulders sheepishly. “i’ve never done anything like this before.”

“we can leave, if you want,” he offered. “i just wanted to show you the city.”

“no.” colt watched her shake her head rapidly, and then ellie leaned in and bumped her shoulder back against his in return. “i didn’t mean it like that. i guess i’m just -- trying to explain. why you think i’m lame.”

he frowned. “i don’t think you’re lame.”

ellie laughed, ducking her head and poking at the styrofoam container in her lap. “you don’t?”

“no. why, because you’re not out tonight? i’m not, either.” in fact, he could probably count all the nights he’d been out since he’d moved in last year on one hand.

“not only that.” she paused thoughtfully, stopping to take a bite of her taco. “because i take school so seriously, i guess.”

colt set his food aside to lean back on his palms, looking out over the city. “there’s nothing wrong with wanting to do well. you’d be, like, my parents’ dream child. i’m sure they both wish i’d take this even half as seriously as you do.”

her head turned, and he caught a glimpse of her soft smile out of the corner of his eyes. “did you miss the deadline to register for classes on purpose?”

he nodded. “i’ve been trying to get kicked out since i got here. it’s harder than you’d think.”

ellie laughed. “why would you want to get kicked out? most people would kill to be here.”

“well, i’m not like most people.” colt pushed the toes of his shoes against the loose edge of the roof, silently debating the rest of his answer. “i never wanted to go to college. but shipping me out here so i’d be out of my dad’s way is the only thing my parents ever agreed on.”

“where’re you from, again?”

“los angeles. but i’ve been with my mom ever since my folks split in denver. my dad -- it’s complicated.”

she was quiet. he wondered what she was thinking. after a moment, she said, “i’m from l.a., too.”

colt’s eyebrows arched high. “really? small world.”

“nothing was the same after my mom got sick, though. my dad never let me out of his sight. it got to a point where being home felt like being in prison.” ellie hesitated, her eyes still on the skyline. “part of me was so relieved to come here that i still feel guilty about it.”

“you shouldn’t feel guilty. it’s your life. you should get a chance to live it.” his brow furrowed as he turned to look at her fully, staring at her profile where she was half-lit by the lights dotting their campus. “you deserve to make your own decisions.”

“i know.” ellie closed the container in her lap, then set it aside. she dusted off her hands and finally tilted her head to look at him, a small smile playing at her lips. “that’s the part i’m most afraid of. not -- taking these chances, and doing all this stuff. but -- messing it up. not doing enough, you know? letting... this opportunity to finally be myself pass me by.”

“yeah.” of course he knew what she meant. that was pretty much what he’d spent the last year doing. “well, you should get out more, then. do all the shit you always wanted to do that your dad never let you try.”

“like what?”

he laughed. “fuck if i know. i thought a girl like you would have a list all ready to go.”

“well...” colt glanced down and saw that she was biting at her bottom lip, like she wasn’t sure she wanted to say whatever was about to come out. “i’ve always wanted to learn to drive.”

“okay.” his left palm spread over hers from behind, and he fanned his fingers out on top of hers, gently pressing her hand around the lever. “this is the clutch. it’s how you shift gears.”

ellie shifted from where she was straddling the bike in front of him. he felt her fingers wiggle underneath his, and saw her head bob with a nod. “got it.”

his right hand curled over hers, gripping the handlebar. “this is the throttle.” colt shifted their hands to the lever beyond the handlebar. “and this is the front brake.”

she hummed, her bare arms warm against his. the parking lot he’d left his bike in was deserted, except for the two of them -- they were pretty far on the outskirts of campus, tucked away from the hustle and bustle of everyone getting ready to go out on a friday night. “what about the back brake?”

colt’s right foot gently kicked hers. “feel the lever down here?”

ellie’s sneaker fumbled around, the heel of her shoe kicking him in the shin before she found it. “uh huh.”

“basically, the right side of the bike is for accelerating and braking. the left side is just to switch gears.”

“this seems a lot more complicated than a car.”

“hey, you want to learn to drive, don’t you? this is the best i can do right now.” but maybe if he ever made it back to l.a. with her, he could show her a really good time. “look, i’ll handle changing gears, okay? you just worry about the throttle. and brake when i tell you to.”

“but how will i know when to accelerate?” her voice sounded a little worried, like maybe she was starting to have second thoughts. he kept his right hand held firmly over ellie’s, moving it to the handlebar before pushing his fingers through hers.

“i’ll give you a squeeze. don’t worry, i’m not gonna let anything happen to you.”

the words left his mouth before he could even think about them. he blinked at her, a long moment of silence stretching between them. ellie leaned her back against his chest, her thumb stroking the side of his hand.

he had the sudden urge to kiss her.

“you have a helmet, right?”

colt jolted out of his thoughts, then slid off the bike to pull it out for her. “yeah, of course. here.” it was a little big on her, but it did the trick -- he pulled it down over her head with a grin, endeared by the way she posed playfully once it was on.

“how do i look?”

“like a total babe,” he answered honestly, pulling his jacket off, too, before handing it to her. “here. better put this on, too.”

“why?” she asked, but she was obligingly slipping her arms into it. like the helmet, it was way too big on her, but unlike the helmet, the sight of her inside of it stirred something within him that he had trouble ignoring. he reached out and settled the jacket on her shoulders more firmly.

“in case you fall. it’ll protect you.”

“i thought you said you weren’t going to let anything happen to me,” ellie hummed, staring at the way the sleeves of the jacket hung down over her knuckles. in the low light of the dark parking lot, it almost looked like she was blushing a little.

“i’m not, but it doesn’t hurt to have an insurance policy.” colt reached out and slid the face shield on the helmet down, over her eyes. “come on.”

ellie got back onto the bike from the left side, just like he’d showed her. she really was smart -- probably even too smart for this stupid school -- and quick, too. her hands found the handlebars straightaway, and he moved snugly up behind her, his arms keeping her close.

their joined left hands pulled the clutch. he shifted to thumb the kill switch with his right hand, and the bike jolted to life beneath them, ellie jerking with it. colt leaned in toward her ear even with the helmet in the way. “relax,” he said, raising his voice a little to be sure she’d hear him, “i know what i’m doing.”

she still squeaked a little when he let the clutch out and the bike slowly started to roll forward. “colt --” her voice was panicked. “help, what do i do?”

“just like we talked about,” he encouraged, “put your feet up. then hit the throttle.”

ellie drew in a deep breath. he could feel her along his chest, and squeezed her hand reassuringly. after a moment, she revved the engine, and then they were off -- a little unsteadily, but in a straight line, at least, heading down the length of the parking lot.

“oh my god! oh my god, i’m doing it. oh my god!”

she was too cute for her own good. the excited tone of voice she had made him grin unabashedly into the air behind her, and he leaned back a little to give her more control, impressed by how smooth her handle on the bike was, for her first time. was there anything she wasn’t fucking good at?

“okay,” he said finally, once they started to run out of space, “both breaks, then your left foot. you’ve got it.” he pulled down on the clutch for her, and then ellie easily halted the bike to a stop. he exhaled a breath he hadn’t known he was holding, but there’d been nothing to worry about -- she was a natural.

“wow,” she gushed, practically jumping off the bike, turning around to face him and throwing the helmet off, “i can’t believe i just drove a motorcycle! i can’t believe you do that every day.”

“you did pretty good,” he praised, “for your first time. a few more lessons and you’ll be a pro.”

“really?” now her cheeks really were flushed, rosy and delighted as she beamed at him with pride. “you’d let me drive your bike again?”

“if you want.” thank god they were alone. if logan could see them he’d be insufferable. even colt could admit this was wildly out of character for him, but he would’ve given anything, just then, to keep her smiling like that. “you wanna see what she can really do? i’ll take us for a ride. all you have to do is hold on.”

“definitely,” ellie grinned immediately, pulling the helmet back on. he’d expected to have to convince her a little more, but -- maybe there was more to her than he’d thought.

a dangerous prospect, given how much he already liked what little he knew.

he waited until she was secure behind him before tearing out of the parking lot and away from campus entirely, taking empty side streets until they were on the highway that’d lead them out of the city. ellie’s hands stayed warm around his waist, and after a few minutes, she leaned her cheek against his shoulder, too, settling something peaceful in his chest. companionable quiet stretched between them while he drove, as fast as he could, just so she’d laugh with exhilaration like she did when he got them into the triple-digits.

eventually he pulled over in a random, deserted park. there weren’t any streetlights in this part of the city, so it was dark, and he could only barely see ellie when he killed the engine and she pulled off her helmet to look at him curiously.

“so?” he asked, “how was it? everything you’ve been waiting for?”

“totally.” ellie grinned at him, so widely her dimple popped out. “i know it sounds cheesy, but tonight... is the most i’ve ever felt like myself. do you know what i mean?”

he was starting to. everything had felt purposeless before she’d showed up here. he’d wanted nothing more than to coast through the next few years, if he absolutely had to.

now it all felt different. because of her.

she was the piece he’d been looking for, something he hadn’t even known he wanted but now was desperate to make his. ellie was sharp and beautiful and headstrong, all the things he needed to fit into the void he was suddenly hoping she’d actually be interested in filling.

“it’s not cheesy if it makes you happy,” was what he settled on, swallowing some of the sudden intensity that was slowly taking him over. “you’ve held back for long enough. you should do whatever you want.”

“you’re right.” ellie’s eyes slid over to meet his, and she smiled at him through the dark, her expression soft and sweet.

colt’s heart thumped loudly. that urge to kiss her was back again, stronger than before. he wasn’t usually the sort of person that resisted an impulse, but part of him was terrified of pushing for more than she was comfortable with, scaring her away with his intensity. he knew he wasn’t the kind of guy a girl like her could handle.

but maybe he didn’t know her as well as he thought he did, yet. ellie leaned in and pressed her lips against his, without warning, surprising him still. colt’s eyes went wide with shock before they slid shut and he kissed her back, twisting on the bike to slide an arm around her shoulders and yank her in as close as she could get.

ellie’s arms, still covered by the fabric of his leather jacket, wound around his waist. she kissed shyly, like she was worried she might be bad at it, but let him take the lead -- and eventually her mouth opened up under his and she shivered in his grip and gave back as good as she was getting, until his mind was blank and the only thing he could focus on was her, under his hands.

they both pulled away at the same time, struggling to catch their breath. she was looking at him like he assumed he must’ve been looking at her: in complete shock, her eyes wide. “wow.”

“yeah.” there was a sarcastic quip on the tip of his tongue, but he swallowed it in favor of studying her face some more -- her cheeks were as flushed as her red lips, which were slowly starting to curve up into a gentle smile. “you ok?”

“um, that was my first kiss,” she admitted, ducking her head. the few strands of hair that weren’t pulled back into her ponytail fell around her face. “i’m probably not helping on the whole you thinking i’m lame front, huh?”

his brain felt like it was short circuiting. “you -- i -- for real?”

“okay, it’s not like i didn’t have options,” she started defensively, rushing to explain, “it just never felt like the right time, and i was waiting for something special, and -- this felt special to me.” her eyes flashed, as though she was waiting for him to start making fun of her at any moment. that was probably fair -- he’d definitely thought about it. “i like you.”

“i like you, too.” probably more than he should. definitely more than he’d ever set out to like anyone, when he’d packed up all his shit and agreed to give this stupid college thing a try.

but she was a distraction he felt was worth the risk.

the expression on her face transformed into something cautiously pleased. “you do?”

“you’re kidding, right? ask logan -- this is the most i’ve left my room in three semesters. i’ve been losing my mind trying to impress you.”

her eyebrows arched. “really? it sure hasn’t seemed that way to me.”

“well -- you were giving me mixed signals.”

he smirked as her expression turned indignant. “i was giving you mixed signals? you went home with that girl!”

colt winced. he was really hoping she hadn’t noticed that. “i thought you were asking me about logan for yourself.”

ellie stared blankly back at him. “oh my god, you’re an idiot.”

“we’re both idiots,” he corrected, rolling his eyes at her.

just as she opened her mouth to bite back, a loud roll of thunder cut through the stillness surrounding them. “shit,” colt sighed, “we should --”

rain started to pour down in heavy sheets, immediately soaking his t-shirt through to the skin. ellie yelped, fumbling for her helmet while he quickly started the bike up again, waiting for her to squeeze her arms around him before speeding back to campus as quickly as possible.

the foot traffic in his building was minimal -- they’d managed to find the sweet spot in the middle of the night where everyone who’d gone out to party was out already, and it was too soon for people to be coming back, so they had their run of the hallways when they rushed inside.

they both laughed breathlessly as they raced up the stairs and into his dorm, dripping water all over the floor.

“god, sorry about your jacket,” ellie said, stripping out of it and leaving it on one of the desk chairs, accepting the towel he passed over to her with a smile.

“it’s fine,” colt said, rubbing his own towel over his hair. “sorry about your -- everything.”

ellie dissolved into giggles that tapered off when he pulled off his soaked t-shirt and flung it into the corner of the room where the rest of his laundry was waiting.

she was staring.

“see something you like?”

the sound of his voice appeared to startled her into looking away, and she laughed again, more nervously this time. “don’t be a dick. you know you’re hot.”

“maybe, but i wanna hear you say it,” he said obnoxiously, his grin widening. “do you think i’m hot?”

ellie drew the towel in her hands around her shoulders, pursing her lips at him. “i think you’re smug, arrogant, obnoxious and wasting your potential.”

if it were at all possible, his grin grew larger. “and?”

she sighed, rolling her eyes heavenward. “and you’re obviously very hot.”

“thank you,” colt said primly, “was that so hard?”

ellie rubbed the towel around her down her arms again before whipping it off and smacking him gently with it. “your ego doesn’t need any more compliments from me.”

colt caught the towel in his hand and used it to tug her in closer. “maybe,” he allowed, dropping his voice as soon as she came near, “but you’re the only one i actually wanna hear them from.”

she blinked at him. her eyes dropped to his mouth.

slowly and deliberately, he wound the towel around his hand, pulling ellie in the last few steps it’d take to close the distance between them. she stumbled forward, reaching out and resting her hands on his arms.

colt locked eyes with her, trying to read her gaze for a sign that he should stop. but there wasn’t one.

he bowed his head and pressed their lips together again, softly at first and then, when she didn’t step on his foot and elbow him in the stomach, a little more boldly, firmly working his mouth against hers.

ellie slid her hands up his arms and over his shoulders, pushing her fingers into his wet hair and angling him in deeper. for someone who’d only just had her first kiss, she had killer instincts -- something he was already looking forward to exploring.

if he’d been waiting for a sign that she was the missing his piece his life had needed, this sure felt like it, or something close to it. she was both the type of girl he’d never go after and exactly what he’d been unknowingly wanting for a long time all rolled into one devastatingly sexy and infuriating package. for as long as colt could remember, he’d assumed there was something unsavory about the way he couldn’t bring himself to consider anyone else he met an equal -- like maybe there just wasn’t anyone else as smart, interesting or determined as him, but... ellie somehow managed to be all that and more.

they had a surprising amount in common. even more surprisingly, that felt like something positive, instead of a curse.

he settled his hands on the small of her back and pulled her in closer, fascinated by the way his thumbs touched as his hands caged her narrow waist. the urge to get her underneath him on his bed swelled until it was no longer ignorable, though just as he started to walk her back over to it, the door to the room swung open abruptly.

they sprang apart as logan stumbled into the dorm. he looked surprised to see them, but then a wide smile lazily overtook his face and he said, “woah, sorry. i can come back later.”

colt glared at him, but it didn’t stop logan from looking between the two of them with his eyebrows arched meaningfully. “yeah, you should --”

“it’s fine,” ellie said loudly, cutting him off. “is it still raining outside?”

logan blinked, seemingly noticing ellie’s damp hair and colt’s bare chest for the first time. “oh. no.”

ellie squeezed his hand, looking back at him questioningly. “walk me home?”

he exhaled, already nodding as he moved to find a new shirt. “yeah. one sec.”

“good to see you, ellie,” logan nodded, still grinning at the both of them even when colt rolled his eyes and started dragging her towards the door, “come back soon, okay?”

ellie shivered the whole way back to her dorm, making him wish he’d grabbed his jacket again before they left. it was mostly quiet while they walked, though the closer they got to the freshmen buildings the louder campus became, with the night getting late enough that people were finally starting to make their way home from the bars.

“so much for my meeting with my advisor tomorrow,” ellie said when they slowed to a stop outside of her building, her jaw cracking with a wide yawn. he shrugged at her, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

this was new to him. part of his brain was insistent that maybe what they’d just done could technically count as a date, though that thought was admittedly a little uncomfortable to confront.

he didn’t think he’d ever been on a date like this before, or, at the very least -- not one that he’d cared about quite so much.

but then she smiled at him, and provided a momentary reprieve from his over-analyzing. “this was fun. maybe next weekend you can help me try something else new.”

colt licked his lips and smirked at her. “i have a few ideas.”

ellie immediately caught on to his implication and flushed pink. the way she smiled softly as she glanced away was almost worryingly cute. “we still have to finish our project.”

“i know. i’m not gonna leave you hanging.” he continued to stare down at her even as her gaze flit around the small section of campus her dorm was tucked away in, looking out over the lawn in front of her building and back to him again.

“you mean that?”

“yeah.” ellie finally looked back at him, then, and caught his eyes. he felt one corner of his mouth lift despite himself into a lopsided smile.

“you’re not gonna get kicked out of school?” something like vulnerability shone in her eyes.

“well -- not before next weekend,” colt answered obnoxiously.

he was hoping to make her laugh, and she did. she reached up and hit his shoulder. “i’m being serious!”

“i know you are.” he paused. getting kicked out of school had always been step one of the plan. if his fucking parents weren’t going to take him seriously, he was going to have to make them -- that started with putting college in his rearview mirror, one way or another.

changing course at this point felt like a weakness.

but she looked pretty hopeful.

“look,” he sighed, “what do you want me to say? i can’t predict the future.”

maybe it was crazy to even think about putting everything on hold for someone he’d literally just fucking met, but there was no denying the way his pulse sped up anxiously when she frowned and ducked her head to stare at her toes.

“i’m not trying to start something that’s just going to set me up to get hurt,” ellie said.

she had a point. he should probably let her get away now, then -- there was no guarantee he wouldn’t hurt her; in fact, it was probably a safe bet he’d do just the opposite. his life wasn’t structured to accommodate a girlfriend.

...but maybe it was time he learned to adapt.

there were few things colt could promise her with certainty that he wouldn’t break them, but there was one thing he had absolute control over. “okay. you want me to promise you i’ll stop trying to get kicked out of school? it’s done. i promise.”

ellie blinked. she looked stunned, as though he’d said the absolute last thing she’d been expecting to hear come out of his mouth. “really?”

“sure.” the look on her face was soothing, a reassurance that despite how new all of this was to him, he wasn’t completely bombing. “as long as you’ll keep making it all suck less.”

everything had seemed markedly less annoying since he’d met her, just a week ago. classes were fun again with someone on his level to argue with, someone whose buttons he could press effortlessly and who always reacted so perfectly when he did. weekends were filled with promise, an opportunity to do something other than sulk in his room suddenly on the horizon.

time no longer felt wasted or like it was dragging at a snail’s pace -- at least not when she was around. now he was desperate for it to slow down, so he could spend even just a few more minutes talking to her, learning her viewpoint on anything and everything, figuring out what made her fucking tick.

...getting her to sigh in that sweet way she did when their lips touched.

“i think i can do that,” she smiled, setting an unfamiliar warm feeling loose within him. optimism, his brain helpfully suggested. maybe the rest of the semester won’t be that bad.

maybe this college thing had its merits after all.

#rodaw #colt kaneko #ellie wheeler #colt kaneko x mc #choices rod #colt kaneko x ellie wheeler #listen i have never once pretended to not be a sucker for college aus #long post #myfic #i read 2 of my old term papers again so i could have accurate classroom dialogue for this #i also had to read a wikihow on how to ride a motorcycle #anyway ummmm i love them your honor #there's nothing n/s/f/w in this one if anyone was wondering #just swearing and absurdity #and the subtext #ride or die

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cosmicheromp3 · 5 years ago

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let’s talk about snowbirds don’t fly for a second, shall we: the arc where roy’s addiction was first introduced, and how it actually affected the relationship between roy and ollie.

people’s perception of snowbirds don’t fly and the events surrounding it is so... weird, to the point where it often makes me wonder whether they’ve actually read the comic (and roy’s appearances right after, but i realize those might be less known) or whether they’re just going off a few very specific panels and inaccurate recounts – usually from people that will twist anything in their favour to call ollie a bad guy.

because, if you pieced together what most people seem to think happened – and this is what i was expecting to find once i decided to read it myself –, in snowbirds we should see: roy, not yet an adult and still under the active care of ollie, starts using drugs, and oliver’s so caught up in himself and negligent that he doesn’t notice what’s happening. when he finally finds out, he lashes out, hits roy and kicks him out of the house, leaving roy without a home. this makes their relationship crumble, and roy starts hating ollie because of it. they don’t speak to each other, and leave in awful terms.

and... in many aspects, that’s so far from the events you'll see if you actually go read green lantern #85 (snowbirds don’t fly) and #86 (they say it’ll kill me... but then won’t say when!). i’m assuming a lot of misconceptions happen because of a) writers with a grudge against ollie who retroactively, and unfairly, painted him in a bad light, and people took this at face value, and b) retcons that came with the new 52 reboot – but, i'll be honest, i don’t care enough to go read that mess even for this post. in general, i’m pretty sure we all agree that we ignore out of character comics; let’s not make roy and ollie the exception to that, yeah?

first i want to get something out of the way, that i feel like i need to mention even though there’s probably people that have talked about it better than i could. when we analyze this comic we should keep in mind that the characters in the story were meant to fill specific roles for the sort of... PSA comic that dc was trying to make, and in the 70s, at that. considering this, both roy and ollie are plot devices.

the creative team behind the story (o’neil and adams) have said that they chose roy to be the average “good” teen who fell into drugs – as a way to say “this could happen to anyone, even to this reputable superhero”. ollie was the caring but imperfect parent who missed the signs – not abusive but distant at the moment, he was meant to be more like a nudge to parents to pay closer attention. it was written to play as a sort of “this could happen to the best of us” situation. and in that context, ollie is made to react in a way that is at most "not ideal" for the standards of its time: he hits roy, and denies to himself that roy’s addiction is a real problem that needs to be dealt with delicately. this is used to send the message of “don’t react like this”.

that isn’t exactly the point of this post, and i don’t want to downplay the harm ollie did with his reaction or absolve him of any blame. the point of this post is: people seem to think that’s where the storyline ended, that was ollie’s final reaction, and those are the terms in which ollie and roy parted; which is just not true.

instead, ollie hitting roy happens in the very first page of green lantern #86 – we have an entire issue in which ollie is faced with his initial reaction and made to confront his mistake (which is more than we can say for, um, other father superheroes that have hit their children. i won’t name names.) the only moment you could read as him “kicking roy out” – which is the phrasing i’ve seen applied to this – happens the very next page, where ollie tells roy to “get out”.

the thing is, roy was not living with ollie at the moment. there was nowhere that ollie could kick him out from. “get out” means just that: get out of this room (and ollie didn’t intend anything more than that with his words.) the comic makes a point of stressing that roy is, by that point, independent, and old enough to be living without a guardian.

ollie, right after roy leaves, thinks: “but he shouldn’t need attention–at his age”. ollie is in the wrong here because of his close-minded view of addiction and because he’s not considering that, though a legal adult, roy is still young and needs care, but it still shows that roy was largely on his own by then. ollie’s reaction is definitively negative and a rejection, but can’t in any way be seen as “kicking roy out”, because it isn’t. (note, also, how ollie’s first thought is that he failed roy, but his denial and stubbornness get in the way and he shifts the blame. he’ll eventually have to get over this and change.)

we see that ollie plays the role of the father that reacts poorly, and he is directly contrasted with the adults who do take responsibility for roy – hal at first, and dinah after, are the ones who play the role of “this is how you should react.”

hal finds roy without knowing what happened between him and ollie, and his first reaction is to take roy to a doctor; he immediately recognizes that what roy needs is help – and will later say so to ollie. when roy refuses, saying he wants to kick the addiction on his own – to prove himself to ollie, because even though he doesn’t think ollie was right he still values his opinion and their relationship, but i’d say there’s something he’s trying to prove to himself, too –, hal recognizes that he doesn’t know anything about drug withdrawal or addiction, and he’s receptive to roy, asking him questions and listening without judgement.

so he takes roy to dinah, who is the one that (very kindly, might i add, because dinah and roy weren’t that close at the time) cares for roy while he goes cold turkey. roy, possibly rather unrealistically, though i’m no expert, kicks the addiction in the span of a few pages. before the ending of this arc, roy has already gone clean.

there’s a one week timeskip there, where we assume that out of the characters featured in this story, roy only interacts with dinah, and ollie’s been with hal. then, before the conclusion of this story, roy is given a place to confront ollie and call him out for his mistakes. roy calls him out for turning his back on him, and he gets to tell him – and show him, punching him in a scene where it’s implied that ollie completely deserves it, unlike the opposite situation that this issue started with – about the pain he’s been in. we are given, in text, a moment where roy can express to ollie what he’s been going through, what he did wrong, and how it affected him.

(this is a moment where the intentions of the comic are very clear, not only because roy practically turns to the camera to deliver the PSA, but also because of the wording: roy told ollie that he turned his back on him, and in the same page he talks about society turning its back on drug addicts, same wording twice. ollie and roy are both meant to represent something other than just themselves, even if this happened in continuity and ended up affecting their characters in the long run.)

and ollie – unlike in that first page, now ollie is shown to listen and understand. he’s not in the same place or mindset he was in when everything started. in the beginning, ollie thought that there must be something inherently bad about a person who does drugs, in a reflection of society’s – and parents’ – views of the issue. and that shows in his initial denial and reaction: ‘how could my son, who’s a good person, do this?’ then, in this scene, when roy tells him he beat the addiction, he answers “good boy” – roy immediately rejects this notion, and emphasizes that there’s more to it than his own goodness: what’s important is the help he received, namely from hal and dinah, and a caring environment. ollie, at the very least, begins to understand this, and in doing so understands very clearly what he needs to change about their relationship if he wants roy back.

this means that ollie starts undergoing character development in this one issue alone. the thing about ollie, in regards to his relationship with roy, is that he has made mistakes and the narrative acknowledges it; but, when well written, he realizes and admits it, making a point of learning from his mistakes. roy knows that ollie has fucked up, too, and doesn’t let him off the hook for it, but he also recognizes that he makes an effort to be better. especially after snowbirds, this informs their relationship a lot.

by the end of the issue they’re not hugging, and roy is leaving on his own, but that’s completely of his own accord. and these are the last panels in the entire issue:

the whole original comic, but mostly these panels specifically, is what makes me wonder about people’s perception of these events, and the misconceptions i previously mentioned – because i really am confused as to how you could reconcile these two opposite readings. unless, you know... people are speaking without ever touching the original comic. (i don’t want to blame anyone for not reading older comics, but please, if you’re gonna speak, especially if it’s to shit on a character or call them abusive the way people do with ollie, do it in an informed way.)

so, right after the events of snowbirds, because roy was allowed to speak up and ollie was made to listen, at least as much as can be expected through his stubbornness, they’re in much better terms than people usually think. if you look at roy’s chronology, he interacts with ollie in his next few appearances (barring the teen titans ones), teaming up as they normally would, with the one difference being the emphasis that’s put into the fact that roy has grown away from ollie – in the same way as any young adult would grow away from a parent. there’s also roy’s resentment for ollie’s actions, but this resentment is portrayed as deserved and it doesn’t turn their interactions into something negative. it’s still clear that they both care for each other, and there’s certainly no hate.

[from action comics #436/2]

this first one takes place a few months after roy goes his own way. roy is in the middle of working a case when ollie gets involved, and they work on it together. green lantern #100/2 is their next appearance and has a similar plot, this time with dinah working with them as well. in both of these, they still work well together, are able to communicate in action and have each other’s backs.

in the action comics issue, ollie insists that roy is still welcome by his side, and that he should still feel free to ask for help whenever he needs it. roy refuses in the way that’s shown in the panels above – saying that he needs to “be a loner for a while” and build a life of his own (though it’s not an exact parallel, because ollie is ollie and takes “loner” to a whole other level, the wording here reminds me of the way ollie tends to leave on his own whenever he feels like he needs to find himself). you’ll see that these interactions aren’t hostile at all – quite the opposite.

world’s finest #251/3 might be the one where their interactions are the most tense, and that’s mostly just in the end. when they’re done with the usual superhero team-up, ollie shows willingness to talk to roy:

“i can’t help out. roy’s back, and, well– we’ve got a lot of talking to do.” through these issues, we realize that ollie has learned: his previous mistake was not paying enough attention to roy, and not showing him that he could always count on ollie (both in noticing roy’s addiction, but also before, in not taking enough care so roy wouldn’t get to that point). he tries to make up for it every chance he has, but it’s always on roy’s terms. everyone is aware that ollie is the one who was in the wrong, and it’s up to roy to forgive him or not, but no one ever pressures roy to do so. when roy doesn’t want to stay and talk, ollie accepts it.

ollie atones again and again, and their relationship isn’t magically fixed and they don’t go back to being close without effort – effort which rightfully has to be done, again, mostly on ollie’s part. but they never, ever go so far as to hate each other.

then, in green arrow (1988) #75, ollie feels so bad about what happened between them, about the way he screwed up, he essentially says to roy that he wouldn’t fault him for wanting to shoot him. “so go ahead. god knows, you’ve got plenty of reason.” roy has been brainwashed here; he breaks through it because of ollie’s words.

and, after this whole ordeal is done, this is how they part ways:

by this point, roy already has lian and a life of his own. he’s gone back to being speedy and then arsenal, he’s in the titans again and he will become a renowned hero in his own right. he might have forgiven ollie a long time ago, but now that he has found himself – like he set off to do at first – he seems more prepared to make amends and see where he stands with him (maybe i’m attributing more consistency among these issues, that happen years apart, than we should actually give them credit for, but i can’t help trying to find the common themes.)

after these, which are the most immediate interactions after snowbirds, we have multiple instances of them being close again. it’s in every small moment they have together, really, but off the top of my head, a couple that are illustrative for their relationship are green arrow: the archer’s quest and justice league of america (2006) #7, even though they don’t directly interact in this last one. i was gonna include panels from both, but this is getting long enough; i urge you to read them, especially if you followed along reading the issues i’ve mentioned, because they’re great. what i am gonna include, cause it’s amazing, is this panel from justice league of america wedding special.

in my opinion, these misconceptions around ollie and roy not only are a disservice to their characters but also mean that people are missing out on what i think is a really interesting relationship. it’s almost rare to see a relationship evolve in a way that feels so organic in comics, not only because the interpersonal conflict here is shown to have real, tangible consequences but also because the characters are allowed to grow in a way that is gradual and natural and even satisfying.

ollie and roy's relationship might have never been the exact same after snowbirds – but which father-son relationship stays the same after the son grows up? and i think it's a testament to the strength of their bond that without ever ignoring these events (because, as i’ve shown, they’re very much acknowledged again and again) they not only never stop loving each other, but are also able to keep building something meaningful going forward.

#roy harper #ollie queen #green arrow #dc #dc meta #drug mention //#long post //#i was gonna put this under a read more but u know what. i'm not gonna give u the option to scroll past this. you are forced to read it #not really but u know hgsdhghsj #you'll notice how many times they call each other dad/son in these panels and that wasn't even intentional #not to keep comparing this to u know who but u know who could never

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rachelbethhines · 4 years ago

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Tangled Salt Marathon - The Brothers Hook

It’s time to say goodbye to Hook Foot. He won’t be missed.

Summary: Rapunzel takes everyone to see Hook Hand in concert. However, this brings back bad memories in Hook Foot, as he was always overshadowed and looked down on by his elder brother. Hook Hand is revealed to be employed by the self-centered King Trevor who wants Hook Hand to play at the ceremony of the marriage between the Seal of Equis and his female mate. When Hook Foot sabotages his brother’s performance at the wedding he must face King Trevor in a dance off to save Hook hand’s career.

The Episode Placement Is Indeed Wrong

I talked about this last episode, but the ordering of episodes is confusing.

The Brother’s Hook does come after Rapunzel: Day One in terms of production order and is placed after it on the Disney Plus, but it supposedly aired before Rapunzel: Day One originally and the events make more sense in that aired order. As they’re traveling on foot here because they lost the caravan, and they’re all stressed out and fighting in the first scene of this episode. Also it world explain Hook Foot’s absence in Rapunzel Day One.

Yet why would they order things that way? Why hold off on resolving the Raps and Cass argument if you’re not going to even hint at it here? Why not place this earlier in the season so that you wouldn’t be dragging Hook Foot along in the Great Tree for no reason?

It just goes to show how rushed and poorly planned out season two actually was.

This is Another Pointless Parallel

So Hook Foot is suppose to represent Cassandra here and Hook Hand is supposed to be Rapunzel in this scenario but like that doesn’t work for several reasons.

For one, Rapunzel never discouraged Cassandra’s dreams. Cassandra herself just never opened up to tell her what those dreams were, and indeed even the audience don’t know what Cass’s dreams are now that she’s already achieved her goal of becoming a guard back in the first season. I don’t think even Cassandra knows what she wants.

Second, Rapunzel and Cassandra’s conflict isn’t actually about ‘dreams’, it’s about control. Each wants to control the other, to be in charge, because they think themselves always right. Both equate ‘being right’ and a lack of criticism as validation and to them, and this show in general, validation is equated with ‘love and compassion’ and is the ultimate end all and be all goal for everyone. Even though that’s not how validation works and a it’s a very unhealthy mindset to promote.

Third, no one owes you anything. Yeah, Hook Hand is a jerk here, but at the end of the day giving up on his dreams was Hook Foot’s choice. You are in charge of your own choices, and at some point you need to decide if you’re going to listen to rest of the world telling you no or have some self respect and do what you want because you want it. You don’t actually need anyone’s approval but your own. By making ‘validation’ the end all and be all of the narrative, it undermines characters agency and fails to teach people about self respect and accountability.

Same goes for Cassandra, even more so in fact. She needs to be the one to get off her ass and try for what she wants. No one is going to hand it to her and Raps doesn’t owe her a damn thing. Cassandra is the only thing getting the way of Cassandra because time and time again the series gives her chances that she refuses to take for ill defined reasons. There’s nothing at stake for her to lose if she just left.

Last off, no one learns anything from this. Cass gets nothing out of it despite being right there the whole time, and Rapunzel is too hypocritical and self centred to see that she is very bit the bully same as Hook Hand. Not because she crushes Cassandra’s dreams like the narrative wants you to think, but because she tries to insert herself and her views on to everyone.

Bullshit

Once again, may I remind you that there is over twenty villians in this show and only four of them get redemptions. Four! And one of those four was Eugene’s doing not Rapunzel’s.

The narrative does not support the ideas that it wants to push. If you want me to believe that Rapunzel does sincerely believe in second chances then you need to show her giving that chance to everybody equally. And no, not everyone has to take it, not everyone needs to be redeemed, but she needs to at least try. Especially if they’re a recurring baddie with a tragic backstory like Lady Caine’s.

Oh, and may I also remind you that currently a 15 year old orphan is rotting away in a jail cell because of the corrupt government and Rapunzel does not give a crap!

The Song Is Sounds Good But It Adds Nothing

It doesn’t add anything to the overall narrative and it fails to add anything to the episode itself because it gives us no new information.

This is extremely wasteful. Not only because Alan Menken and Glenn Slater are highly respected artists who are wasting their talents on crap like this, but also for pure budgetary reasons. Tangled has a limited budget for songs that is worked into the contract. Each season is suppose to get eight original songs and two reprises. (tho season three trades out one of those songs for an extra reprise)

In an arc heavy series like this, with such a limited number of songs to convey information, then you need to choose where those songs go wisely. The writers did not choose wisely in this instance.

Rapunzel You Are Not In A Position To Give Advice Here

This episode is foreshadowing for what season three would become. Which is a complete formula switch up that undermines the narrative’s goals.

This is suppose to be a coming of age tale. That’s in its mission statement. It’s what the writers supposedly wanted to achieve according to interviews and the very pilot episode itself.

That requires Rapunzel learning and growing. She can’t be in the mentor role. She can’t be the one to give out sage advice if she is the one who is meant to grow the most. She not there yet. She’s not experienced enough to fulfill that place in the narrative.

Season one may have been repetitive in it’s lessons but it at least tried to show Rapunzel owning up to mistakes and changing as a person, but here and in season three they toss that out the window and have Rapunzel teaching other people lessons instead. People who ultimately don’t matter to the overall narrative.

Instead of showing her growing as a person and coming to fit in that role over time due to experience, it has the opposite effect of showing Rapunzel as being patronizing, selfish, and unworthy to rule. Because she has no grounds for having an opinion, no basis for her advice to go off of, no experience to back up what she says, and zero claims for being in charge except for being born in a classist feudal system.

Had the narrative actually bothered to call out this instead of just having Cass pitch a hissy fit over nothing, then we could have gotten a really complex character and unique moral to the show, but that’s not what actually happens.

King Trevor Is the Saving Grace of This Episode

I don’t think the writers realize that Trevor isn’t the hateable douche that they believe him to be.

Oh sure he’s not nice, he’s essentially the equivalent of an annoying ‘I want to speak to the manager!’ type customer. But there is a huge, huge difference between being a Karen and being a fascist dictator. One’s irritating and the other is actively malicious and a danger to people's lives.

Frederic might be outwardly more pleasant but he’s still a person who abuses his power in order to harm poor people. Trevor is just a mother-of-bridezilla here and a perfectionist. Like big deal.

And to be honest Rapunzel isn’t that much better.

Like you are a bully Raps. You’re every bit a pushy and demanding as Trevor is, particularly in season three.

While she’s not actively malicious like Frederic, she’s still a danger to people because she refuses to acknowledge that the power she wields has an impact on others lives and that that impact can indeed be negative.

There’s something called the banality of evil. That being simply mean to others isn’t how true evil spreads. It’s people refusing to challenge the system, and if you are a part of that system then you are a part of the evil it spreads no matter how nice you are outwardly.

Rapunzel and the show at large, does not understand the difference between being nice and being kind. It introduces the concept of flawed government and systems but then does nothing to actually challenge it. It forgoes the actual work it takes to make change happen by focusing on easy outs and proformative progressivism.

Trevor does more than either Frederic or Rapunzel here with this one line alone than they do in three full seasons.

Eugene did indeed commit a violent crime, no matter how much the show tried to present such a crime as ‘funny’. Trevor is in his legal rights to prosecute the person who tried to kidnap his child/pet and assaulted his personage.

Yet he’s actually granting mercy here. More than that, he’s inviting them to his child’s/pet’s wedding. He’s offering friendship when he could have had them killed. Because Tevor, for all his faults, recognizes the power the that he wields and then makes the conscious decision not to abuse that power.

Moreover over he acknowledges the difference between what is a personal offense and not a an attack on his kingdom as a whole. What Eugene and Frederic did could have been considered an act of war and Trevor never even considered that an option.

It’s sign of bad writing when the person we’re supposed to consider a jerk and a recurring antagonist is more compassionate than the main heroine herself. Even as he jeers and makes an arse of himself.

This is the Point Where Rapunzel’s Characterization Buckles and Breaks

At first glance this seems like growth. She’s now assertive and taking charge, and Hook Hand did indeed had this coming, but in context of the greater narrative and how Rapunzel’s character develops past this episode, this is the point where the wheels start to come off.

Rapunzel is a hypocrite. We’ve established this as a fundamental part of her characterization back in season one and it’s the driving force behind all of the main conflicts with her in the first two seasons. But before now, her hypocrisy at least had consequences. It caused enough problems that if you were paying attention you could see it for the flaw that it was.

But here her hypocrisy is presented as being right. She looks over Hook Hand even as she tells him not to look down on others. She dictates to him how his relationship with his own brother should go, when she has zero context for said relationship. She’s heard only one side of the story and only a piece of it. She doesn’t know what actually went down between them while they were growing up nor does she honestly care why Hook Hand does what he does. Even as she asks him why.

Yet she is rewarded for this behavior. She’s never called out as wrong. The narrative bends over backwards to accommodate her and reinforces her views. Without direct consequences a character’s flaws are rendered meaningless, and so the character will only frustrate the audience rather than endear themselves to us.

That is the opposite of what you want to achieve in a story. You want to the audience to like you’re main characters, or at least find them entertaining in their awfulness. Making them right all of the time, even when they’re wrong sabotages this goal.

Trevor’s Still the Better Person Here

Like it may not have been Hook Hands fault, but at the end of the day he did screw up at his job and a paying customer has the right to be upset and refuse to work with you again or even demand their money back. That’s what being self-employed means. It’s part of the risk you take as being a contractor.

Trevor’s not being unreasonable here just because he raised his voice and wants Hook Hand to leave the wedding premises. Yeah the insults are uncalled for, I’ll give you, but remember that Frederic locked a tailor in a stockade for accidently ripping a robe; that he has the ability to fix if he wasn’t locked up.

And he resolves conflicts and personal insults with a dance off!

What happened when someone called Frederic out for being a poor leader and endangering lives, oh yeah they wound up in jail!

Also This Episode’s Big Climax is a Fucking Dance Off

Out of all the low stakes conflicts in this show this is the lowest.

And it’s coming right off The Great Tree and the big Cassandra vs Rapunzel fight. This shouldn’t be here. It’s throws off the pacing the tone.

Well I Guess Trevor Kept HIs Word, Which Is More Than What Frederic Would Do

Like Trevor is defeated and he does indeed complain about losing, but everyone is apparently free to leave afterwards and Hook Hand still has a career so I guess Trevor kept his side of the bargain. Even though he has no reason to and no one to hold him to account for it. He just has a code of honor I guess.

Meanwhile, Frederic throws a teenager in a dungeon after promising to help him and completely ignores his supposed friend Quirin being encased in amber.

So What Was the Point In Bringing Hook Foot Along Again?

What did Hook Foot add? What did he bring to the story that no other character out there could bring? What does writing him out of the story now achieve, and why couldn’t he have been left out of the narrative all together?

If your answer to all of those question is ��Nothing!’, then congratulations you have more sense than the showrunners.

I have seen a few people get angry and suggest that Lance should have been the one to go because getting rid of Hook Foot meant getting rid of the shows main disabled rep, but that’s ignoring that getting rid of Lance would mean getting rid of the shows only real black representation as well. Because tokenism isn’t real representation.

Yet for all of how poorly handled Lance’s character was, he still has more reason to be there than Hook Foot. He has a unique connection to one of the main characters that, once introduced, would be hard to ignore. There’s nothing connecting Hook Foot to the plot or the main characters, and that’s why he shouldn’t have been in the show at all. Regardless of how much you may have liked him.

Destiny Isn’t a Goal!!!

How many times do I have to say this!?

A goal needs to be specific. It needs to have logical motivation behind it. It needs a clear obstacle to be overcome for the character to achieve it.

A vague ‘destiny’ has none of those things.

Conclusion

Meh. That’s the word that best describes this episode and the majority of season two. It’s not the worst thing ever if you just want to shut your brain off for 30 minutes, but it’s not actually good either, and if you stop to think about any of it for more than two seconds it falls apart.

#tangled #anti-tangled #hook foot #anti-rapunzel #tangled the series #rapunzel's tangled adventure

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schraubd · 4 years ago

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A New Challenger Approaches!: Evaluating the Jerusalem Declaration on Antisemitism

Yet another antisemitism framework has emerged, with the release of the Jerusalem Declaration on Antisemitism (JDA) signed by around two hundred Jewish Studies scholars. This, of course, comes rapidly on the heels of the Nexus document on antisemitism (of which I was one of the drafters), meaning we now have two new antisemitism frameworks standing as potential complements (or alternatives) to the venerable IHRA definition.

The other day I made a handy table summarizing the similarities and differences between the three definitions. That was designed to be a pretty straightforward, "just the facts" presentation. But I also want to give my evaluative judgment on the Jerusalem Declaration in comparison to IHRA and Nexus (I wrote more on the Nexus document, specifically, in this post). Obviously, the fact that I was a Nexus author means I have a dog in this hunt, though I don't view these definitions as in competition with one another. And likewise, I don't have direct knowledge of the background and genesis of the Jerusalem Declaration in the same way I do for the Nexus document -- some of my comments will be based on inference and speculation. So take them with however much salt you think is appropriate.

This is a somewhat long post, divided roughly into three parts. First, I address differences in the orientation of the JDA compared to the other frameworks -- who wrote and who their audience is. Second, I examine the JDA's relationship to IHRA -- particularly IHRA as a symbol of (depending on who you ask) rallying against antisemitism or creating toxic policing of discourse on Israel -- and how that is mediating the reception (both positive and negative) of the JDA. Finally, I address where the JDA is substantively different from the other frameworks and where it isn't. Likewise, I identify a few important areas that neither the JDA nor IHRA address that are included in the Nexus document: the inclusion of conditions (alongside attitudes and behaviors) as a potential form of antisemitism, recognizing and objecting to the practice of routine and reflexive dismissal of antisemitism claims, and addressing how Jews who take the "wrong" (however defined) position on Israel see their Jewish identity denigrated or denied -- a form of harassment that especially targets Jews of Color.

I. The JDA's Orientation

At the outset, there are a few core differences in the orientation of the JDA in comparison to the Nexus document -- who wrote it and what it is targeting. The JDA has more of a European center of gravity, whereas the Nexus is more American; the JDA is primarily endorsed by academics, whereas the Nexus document was geared more towards "community leader" sorts. Obviously, these are generalizations -- the JDA has American signatories, the Nexus document had academics involved (such as myself). But I think these broad-stroke differences exert a noticeable impact in terms of what is and isn't prioritized, and who was and wasn't sought to be "included" in the definition.

In particular, the JDA seems to have been very invested in coming up with a definition that could get non- or anti-Zionists onboard alongside at least liberal Zionists (getting a document signed by Susannah Heschel and Richard Falk is no mean feat!). In doing so, the JDA gives the non-Zionist contingent a few very big wins: it expressly declares BDS not antisemitic, and it more or less declares calls for the dissolution of Israel to be not antisemitic (the constraint is that any alternative polity that is envisioned must be one that protects "the right of Jews in the State of Israel [or, I imagine, its hypothetical successor] to exist and flourish, collectively and individually, as Jews"). The Nexus document, by contrast, had as its target audience (more or less) the median American Jew -- envisioned as a Biden-style Democrat who identifies as broadly Zionist and pro-Israel but has his or her fair share of criticism. Accordingly, the Nexus doesn't speak directly on BDS, implicitly judging it by the other standards in the document, and contains a more robust defense of the right of Jewish self-determination than is present in the JDA (it is notable that challenging Israel's "right to exist" is viewed as antisemitic by an extremely wide consensus of American Jews -- more so than almost any other issue).

The JDA's audience is thus simultaneously broader and narrower than the Nexus': it reaches non-Zionist activists for whom it is exceedingly important that challenging Israel's existence as a Jewish state not be labeled antisemitic, but in doing so it may have language that's a veritable poison pill for rank-and-file Jews (at least in the US). The Nexus document was meant to be a viable set of guidelines for a Democratic administration that would let them handle antisemitism controversies while avoiding obvious shoals and pitfalls. The JDA (and I think this is true even if one agrees with it on its merits) would be more likely to provoke controversy simply because of its explicit language on BDS and its position that denying Jewish self-determination in Israel is not necessarily antisemitic. The JDA is I think more valuable as a tool of public discourse than something that could be "adopted" by a particular organization, especially (say) the Democratic Party (and the JDA is quite explicit that it is not meant to be adopted or codified as any explicit legal tool).

II. The Symbolism of IHRA

Speaking of provoking controversy, another defining feature of the JDA is its explicitly antagonistic posture towards IHRA. The Nexus document sought to position itself as primarily an interpretive resource -- a complement where IHRA was vague or incomplete (as Jonathan Jacoby put it, IHRA is the Mishnah and Nexus is the Gemara). The JDA, by contrast, is very much taking aim at the king. As I mentioned in my post on the Nexus document, IHRA has taken on such symbolic weight that one can generate almost reflexive support and opposition for a given initiative simply by presenting as a challenge to IHRA, and that's definitely occurring here. People who hate IHRA are cheering the JDA simply because it's the "anti-IHRA", even when their own conduct would seemingly be obviously indicted under the JDA's definition. As noted above, Richard Falk is a signatory even though he's endorsed materials which seem to cleanly fall under categories the JDA deems antisemitic. Jackie Walker praised the JDA too even though her antisemitism likewise would be covered by the JDA. It's doubtful that such persons are backing the JDA as a mea culpa for their past misconduct; rather, they see the JDA as a counter to IHRA's putative "weaponization" of antisemitism and endorse it on that basis. If or when the JDA does get cited to label them as antisemitic, I suspect they will be just as dismissive as they've been in the past.

Arguably, then, just like IHRA there is a risk that the JDA will be "applied" in a purely symbolic manner divorced from its actual textual mandates. Just as IHRA's language insisting that context matters has been roundly ignored, one can easily imagine persons accused of antisemitism "citing" the JDA for the blithe retort that "criticism of Israel is not antisemitic" while disregarding language in the JDA which arguably encompasses their particular "critique". As always, one suspects the most important interpretive canon in accept or applying any definition of antisemitism will be the overriding principle "me and my friends are not antisemitic."

The hegemony of IHRA's symbolism doesn't just afflict the JDA's defenders. IHRA's advocates also have gotten so invested in the importance of IHRA as a marker for "taking antisemitism seriously" that they are often unwilling to recognize IHRA has quite a few serious gaps and ambiguities. The core definition itself is nearly useless ("A certain perception of Jews, which may be expressed as hatred toward Jews" -- what does that mean?), and the illustrative examples, while helpful as far as they go (and IHRA itself says they only go so far as to be cases which "could, taking into account the overall context," be antisemitic), are significantly underinclusive even leaving aside IHRA's relative lack of guidance on what "context" can be used to assess whether any given speech or behavior that abuts one of the examples actually is antisemitic. As a symbolic gesture where a given organization says "we care about antisemitism", IHRA can stand alone (in large part because for that function it doesn't matter what IHRA says). As an actual substantive tool for identifying antisemitism, IHRA needs to be expounded upon, and that is a task that (in different ways) both the Nexus document and the JDA attempt to tackle.

Unsurprisingly, I prefer the Nexus' approach of not directly trying to overthrow IHRA but rather fine-tune, calibrate, and direct it. I have no desire to undermine the symbolic importance of IHRA, but I very much have an interest in alleviating the very real gaps and shortfalls present under any honest reckoning with IHRA's text. Even still, if I'm being honest I suspect that the JDA will prove more influential than Nexus simply as a function of polarization. The people who blame IHRA for creating a toxic atmosphere around antisemitism want something that directly challenges it. The people who are basically content with the way antisemitism discourse has proceeded around IHRA will stick with it, without seeing the need for modification. Even if substantively the Nexus does the best job of filling the pitfalls and potholes in IHRA while representing a vision of fighting antisemitism that aligns with the median American Jew, the seemingly inexorable pull of polarization will drive people into the arms of either IHRA or anti-IHRA (which is to say, JDA).

III. Substantive Similarities and Differences Across the Frameworks

You might have noticed that the above analysis actually doesn't concentrate that much on the actual substantive differences between the three antisemitism frameworks. One reason for that is that, as my table illustrates, there are fewer differences between them than one might guess from the heated nature of the JDA and IHRA's reception. Certainly, it is fair to focus on the areas where the definitions depart -- that's what should determine whether one prefers one over another -- but that focus can overshadow the significant agreement in a large set of cases regarding what is antisemitic amongst all three frameworks. All agree that criticism of Israel can be antisemitic insofar as Israel is a Jewish institution (and thus none indulge in the tritely true but banal point that "Judaism and Israel are not the same thing"), all agree that criticism of Israel is not always antisemitic, all agree that "tropes" (variously worded) are an important feature of antisemitism, and all agree that notions of Jewish collective responsibility for alleged Israeli misdeeds are antisemitic.

What are the key differences? I've mentioned two already: IHRA and Nexus both consider denial of Jewish self-determination rights to be antisemitic, while the JDA seemingly does not; and IHRA and Nexus don't speak specifically on BDS, while the JDA expressly says it is not antisemitic. These are both significant. BDS is a well-known third rail in Jewish politics, and Nexus' "strategic ambiguity" (to put it uncharitably) on the question is an attempt to traverse a cliff the JDA eagerly dives off. Likewise, as noted above the "Israel has no right to exist" position is one on which there is almost unrivaled Jewish consensus regarding its antisemitic character, so the JDA's dissident position here is risky indeed.

Beyond those two issues (and putting aside any nitpicking one can do about phrasing or word choices), the other big departure I see in the JDA is that it explicitly says that "double standards" are not antisemitic, whereas IHRA says they are. The Nexus tries to take a middle position here, agreeing that double standards are antisemitic but refusing the simplistic argument that any time Israel is concentrated on or even "singled out" in a discrete case that is evidence of a double-standard (as I've argued, AIPAC "singles out" Israel -- is that antisemitic? Of course not). The JDA's rejection of including "double standards" likely stems from the view that this language has been particularly abused by right-wing zealots who argue that essentially any Israel-critical activity that does not simultaneously tackle the entire world is per se antisemitic. That notwithstanding, the JDA's dismissal of double standards as even a potential form of antisemitism seems clearly incorrect. Disparate treatment -- treating likes unalike -- is perhaps the closest thing there is to the paradigm case of discrimination and it'd be simply weird for antisemitism to stand alone in not including this very intuitive case. If one can subject Jews or Jewish institutions to different standards than other comparable actors in global affairs without it being labeled "antisemitic", you've created a loophole you can drive a truck through.

It is also important flag a group of important components of antisemitism that are found only in the Nexus definition and are not present or discussed in either IHRA or the JDA. The first is that the Nexus definition is the only one which considers certain social conditions (on top of behaviors or attitudes) to be cases of antisemitism: specifically, those conditions "that discriminate against Jews and significantly impede their ability to participate as equals in political, religious, cultural, economic, or social life." I lobbied very hard to include this language, and in some ways I think it is the single most important point in Nexus' favor compared to other frameworks. Ironically enough (given that the Nexus document is nominally limited to the Israel case), the inclusion of this language is why the Nexus document is probably the only framework of the three which could explain why a proposed ban on Kosher slaughter would be antisemitic -- it does not fall within any of either IHRA or JDA's examples, but it would represent a social condition which "significantly impede[s] [Jews'] ability to participate as equals" in European society. Understanding antisemitism as not just a set of attitudes or behaviors but as a state of social affairs better aligns antisemitism with emerging understandings of racism and other forms of oppression, all of which have dedicated considerable attention to understanding inequality at least partially in those terms.

The second inclusion in Nexus not seen in the other frameworks is an acknowledgment of the epistemic antisemitism that occurs when Jewish claims regarding antisemitism are reflexively or cavalierly dismissed. The so-called Livingstone Formulation, where claims of antisemitism can be immediately brushed off by claiming they're actually attempts to "silence criticism of Israel," is one of the primary mechanisms through which Jews are impeded in their ability to be treated as valid and viable claim-makers in public discourse. Here, too, recognition of this practice as a form of antisemitism aligns antisemitism with other forms of oppression where it has been well-acknowledged that these sorts of reflexive dismissals are themselves manifestations of racism, sexism, or what have you (as in the infamous and ubiquitous "race card" retort). The opening entry of the Nexus definition is decisive on this point: "All claims of antisemitism made by Jews, like all claims of discrimination and oppression in general, should be given serious attention" -- which is not to say automatic acceptance, but not immediate eye-rolling dismissal either. Neither IHRA nor the JDA address this issue -- IHRA probably wasn't thinking about it at all, and the JDA it's fair to assume includes a good number of stakeholders who are at least sympathetic to the notion that antisemitism claims are regularly abused and so need tighter policing.

The final major feature of Nexus not found in its compatriots is an acknowledgment of a particular type of antisemitism that targets Jews for having the "wrong" view on Israel, at which point their status as Jews is called into question. Rudy Giuliani claiming that he's "more of a Jew" than George Soros is a high-profile case here. But the importance of including this as a form of antisemitism stemmed from the way in which this sort of marginalizing rhetoric is especially likely to be deployed against Jews of Color, who regularly are assailed as being "fake" or "lesser" Jews (even by non-Jews!) if they deviate from an imagined proper or correct Jewish standpoint on Israel. The Nexus document accordingly recognizes that "denigrating or denying the Jewish identity of certain Jews because they are perceived as holding the 'wrong' position (whether too critical or too favorable) on Israel" is a form of antisemitism, and I can say that language was included in specific recognition of dynamics one increasingly sees on social media where JOCs have been subject to brutal and persistent harassment along this exact dimension. It is a recurrent failing of Jewish efforts on antisemitism that we often are not thinking intersectionally -- and so the discrete experiences or problems faced by, e.g., Jewish women, or Mizrahi Jews, or Jews of Color, as Jews are overlooked or not incorporated. I'm sure the Nexus document can still improve on this front, but I am proud that it made at least a step in the right direction.

via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/3fka31c

#anti-semitism #discourse #Jews

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gayregis · 4 years ago

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Hi good morning can we talk about twn ciri for a sec? There is something about the way she’s portrayed by the actress that just drives me CRAZY and I don’t know quite how to put my finger on it. I think she’s just so reserved and serious and haughty, whereas in the books she’s really playful and lively and exaggerated and just?? Has emotions?? And also I was spoiled by Peter Kenny’s fantastic accent for ciri and can’t think of her any other way. ANYWAY WHAT R UR THOUGHTS CUZ IM SURE THEY’RE GOOD

ohohoh yes. just as a prefacee and for context, freya allan (ciri’s actress) is 18 years old, and i am 19 years old, so to say i didn’t like her acting in twn isn’t me bullying or being harsh on a minor. in addition, i also don’t think her acting was bad. i think her acting was great, but it was just out of character for ciri, at least the ciri we know from the books... i do not think the directors treated ciri with enough weight as she needed to have in the narrative. like with yennefer, they gave her way more screen time and much less significance in the overall story, because the moments that they gave them to be on screen were just pure filler with no effect on the character development, relationship development, setting, themes... the audience never learned anything useful when they were on screen, besides lore about aretuza and cintra that would immediately escape their minds after the episode was done.

i know for a fact that this “out of character” acting for ciri (her being “so reserved and serious and haughty”) was a result of the directors and people running the show, and NOT freya herself as an actress. like with joey batey and anya chalotra i think, they got the short stick in this deal. they’re actors, so their profession is to act, but they don’t always get to decide HOW they’re supposed to act and portray these beloved characters. that’s what the director is for, right? to direct how scenes play out, to make sure the characters are in-character. and the writers are the ones that write the actors’ lines and the scenes they exist in, so “then it’s just like any other place,” or “who’s yennefer,” and other ridiculous garbage throwaway lines were the writers’ fault and not the actors. i just think it’s important to establish that even though yes, freya is an older teenager/young adult, she’s not responsible for a lot of decisions involving ciri and the character. plus since she is 18 and just got done being 17, i feel like this is the first time she’s actually been able to legally make her own decisions.

plus in this topic, because i’ve never mentioned it anywhere before, i’d like to bring light to how it’s super shady of netflix to decide to hire an actress for ciri who is BARELY an adult actor, because child actors (as opposed to adult ones) are restricted by many different laws concerning how many hours they can work, etc. the fact that freya is 18 means that they can give her more work and disregard any regulations that may have applied to a child actor, and i think i literally read this from lauren hissrich in an interview, that “older actors are easier to work with than child actors” or something like this, that it’s difficult to shoot with child actors due to the immense restrictions. so although they phrased the casting choice for freya allan more in the sense of “well, we were GOING to cast someone younger, but freya was just so fantastic in auditions that we NEEDED her in this production” is suspicious to me, i think they did it so they wouldn’t have to deal with the headache of laws surrounding child actors (note that i do NOT doubt that freya is a great actress, i liked her acting, i mean look at the scenes she is in! she is actually acting, unlike henry cavill).

speaking of henry cavill, anyone want to mention his 19 year old girlfriend or his “opinions” on the #MeToo movement? no? my more conspiratorial theory is that they might have just wanted to get a barely legal actress for ciri because if cavill were to “do anything”... ahem... it would be less complicated for all of the legality than if he “did anything” to a child. i’m not calling cavill a r*pist but he has made his views on women explicitly clear, and a LOT falls under the umbrella of sexual assault and harassment. innappropriate comments, etc... i don’t trust him to respect women just as much as i don’t trust him to act.

that was a big preface that pretty much went nowhere, apologies... but i think it’s significant to look at the context around the actor or actress when they’re likely being a tad exploited on set. but yes, ciri does come off as super out of character to me in the majority of scenes she is in. it’s because her character was set up to be a white feminist fantasy of being declared innocent from the sins of her family because she feels bad about it, with her “being so privileged and then she finds out her grandmamma committed mass genocide and she has to realize that her royal ways!” instead of anything related to what we see in the books, of a vulnerable child losing that childhood and trying to cling to some sense of normalcy and family. they set her up as “a princess” and not “a child.”

in the books, she’s just a child, and then geralt learns she’s a princess and teases her that she doesn’t look much like one, being lost in a forest with a snotty nose... she’s not introduced in a royal court surrounded by noble guests. i doubt that books ciri spent all of her time in court, either... according to the lore, she wouldn’t even be able to sit down and she would have to stand in calanthe’s presence (season of storms, the princes must stand in the royal court alongside their father while coral gets to sit because she is a sorceress... of course, this is cidaris and not cintra, but it still stands). she is a princess, but she has difficulty acting like one... it’s something i’d rather erase from my mind because it’s one of those “problematic points of canon that only exist because they live in a medieval society,” but it’s made clear that calanthe gave ciri the belt for misbehaving, multiple times. ciri is obviously interested in more childlike pursuits and acts outside of her station a lot. after all, she is the reason that their entourage got pulled into brokilon in the sword of destiny, because ciri fucking ran away since she didn’t want to be brought to and married off to prince kirsten of verden.

again on ciri’s age, she was 8 or 9 when we first meet her in the books, and 14 when we meet her in the netflix series. that’s a vast amount of difference in age, not only by years, but by development and experience. an 8 year old is a 3rd grader, a 14 year old is a high school freshman. i think that makes a lot of difference in not only how much agency a character is treated with, but how an audience views them. i mean, 14 is a good age for a YA novel protagonist - think harry potter or percy jackson. ciri in the netflix adaptation was set up more as someone relatable (to those younger watching) as she’s like the hero of her own story! she escapes from her evil evil evil pursuers and has this great power she doesn’t yet understand! whereas books ciri is meant more for an audience to feel like geralt toward - protective, parental, you find a child in the middle of the woods, and you’re thinking, “what’s with this... sassy lost child?”

sapkowski is also the master of a good character reveal. i think ciri, cahir, regis, even characters like vilgefortz, have these GREAT reveals as to who they were all along! surprise, surprise, there is no black knight of cintra, it’s just a young man paralyzed with fear and pain! surprise, surprise, the guy that knew a lot about vampires and lived near a cemetery and dresses in all black is a vampire (ok, this reveal is weaker... but you’ve got to admit, the actual reveal scene... alright).

ciri had a GREAT character reveal in the books. since we see everything from geralt’s perspective, she’s just some child, she’s just some brat geralt finds in the wilderness, he doesn’t have ANY reason to feel any sort of way to her, and he practically adopts her and she feels safe with him. he recognizes her vulnerability as a child and does anything to protect her and guide her. this is what is meant by “something more,” their relationship from the beginning was something more than strictly destiny. destiny may have led them together, but it did not make them become family, they did that themselves. and later when geralt learns that ciri is the princess of cintra, the child surprise promised to him, does he even consider destiny as part of the equation. and this is actually what drives them apart, because geralt believes that he will and refuses to ruin her life by introducing her to the blade, and thus, death. because it’s not incredibly special that ciri is a child surprise, i wouldn’t say it’s horribly common, but it’s not like she’s the only one. and she’s definitely not the only child to be taken/taken in and raised by witchers. and geralt knows what being raised as a witcher is like, and he refuses to do that to her, because he actually loves this child as his daughter. and this is where the conflict stems from, because geralt spit in destiny’s face and said, fuck you, i’m not going to hurt this child. and destiny said, i’m going to hurt her anyways.

in the netflix series? the first time we see ciri... is in cintra! the surprise is RUINED!! child surprise, more like child already-revealed. the audience has no reason to watch anymore, because we already know who she is and what happens to her. they literally kill calanthe and eist off in the first episode, and then expect the audience to CARE about them during episode 4 when they adapted a question of price. in the books, dandelion telling geralt the accounts of the massacre of cintra was a heavy scene, it was a tragic scene, and you knew somehow that it was geralt’s fault because of how he had refuted destiny, you had the lore on your side if you had been reading the stories beforehand, you understood why this was happening and what has happened to ciri.

also side note, i sincerely think the massacre of cintra is better coming from geralt’s best friend, someone he’s known for years and trusts immensely, also a poet so his account is horrifyingly immaculate and it really hits that mark of chilling, rather than geralt just... idk being there? i didn’t watch this far but he showed up to cintra and calanthe threw him in jail? this makes no sense, why would she... anyways. but yes, dandelion is a character that serves to be there for geralt, so it makes sense for him to tell geralt about cintra because then geralt can respond and thus demonstrate to the readers/audience all of the emotions about it that he is feeling.

but yeah so to summarize, my thoughts are that ciri really comes off as a weaker character in the netflix series than in the books because:

they treated her as older and introduced her as the lion cub of cintra and not as just some child found in the woods, taking BOTH the “child” and “surprise” out of “child surprise”

they removed geralt’s paternal relationship to her and why exactly he is significant in her story, and hyped up the “destiny” thing instead, which came off as completely meaningless, not to mention annoying to hear repeated when there has been no significance developed behind the word. i mean, they cut out both brokilon and something more (i will NOT accept that scene as the ending scene of something more. that wasn’t a hug fit to pick your kid up from afterschool, much less a hug that you run towards your kid with when you thought they perished and you were responsible for it, when you risked your life just to maybe be able to see them again. there was also no dialogue, no “geralt, you’ve found me! after all this time! i knew it! i’m your destiny! say it, i’m your destiny? am i your destiny?” “you’re much more than that, ciri. much more.” so that sucked).

they chose an older actress for ciri, likely to evade having to respect their actors by working within the confines of child labor laws, but not only this, they treated her older in the narrative and made the viewer empathize with her instead of with geralt, the parent... ciri only is supposed to become a “relatable” character when she reaches 13 or 14, in blood of elves and in time of contempt.

they reduced the significance of how deep her trauma was from the massacre of cintra (she makes one offhand comment about how cahir had a bird on his head... that’s not gonna cut it for me. she’s so far experienced a total of zero nightmares about the black knight of cintra).

they gave her a bunch of filler scenes that had absolutely no impact on the broad story or her character development or relationships with other characters (doppler plot). they also made her arc surround unlearning being a princess and finding what epic powers she might have, and nothing comes from both of these points. she doesn’t develop any character because of these points, they’re just there for more filler.

a tad unrelated but: they made yennefer’s wanting a child more of an obsession than a goal the character just happens to have, and have sexualized her character immensely, moreso than in the books... plus the fact that they made her super appealing to the audience and to every other character including geralt from the start (she’s not someone who is icy at first, then warms up), makes me feel like we are never going to get ciri and yennefer at ellander. ever. i just can’t imagine it with this ciri and this yennefer from the netflix series.

#ask #ciri #the witcher netflix #the witcher #zireaells #geralt

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