#(looking at you jon you fucking theatre kid)

[nyxiotart]

Jmart's been computerized

[magpod-confessions]

I don’t like the short Jon hc’s.

that mother fucker is lanky and tall as fuck he did theatre when he was a kid and tripped over literally everyone else in the cast. No I’m not projecting. He developed the habit of sitting in the back of the class just for the other students to be able to see the damn teacher bc his growth spurt hit faster than everyone he knew.

I’ve only seen one other person who agrees with me on talljon. But it’s not enough. I still see everyone BASH and BRUTALLY DEMOLISH tall Jon let us tall Jon kinnies have this one detail FOR ONCE

I don’t even know where the fuck this hc started. I want to take a screenshot of whoever started this and print it out and crumple it in my tall person hands and stomp on it with my over-priced way too large than they should be shoes. Then I will delete the photo from my camera roll for a final fuck you then I will rb the psot saying “YOU” in the “biggest” formet as well as with both bold and italic. An underline if I’m having a bad day.

Martin is average height. He’s not very tall. He’s just a guy. Even more of a reason why Jonah/elias underestimated him. He’s not that tall nor intimidating on the height scale. Jon is tall.

Jon. Is. Fucking. Tall.

he took every single opportunity when he was mad at Martin in s1 to LOOK DOWN UPON HOM and Martin found it kinda hot even if he thought Jon was a prick.

Let Jon Be Tall 2024.

I do not take criticism on this hc.

I would do this off anon but I shall spare thee this time.

This time.

.

[evb0]

procrastinating so u guys get my hatchetverse hcs!!! (these are going to be a lot of shit i picked up from random posts that i dont remeber the ops of so sorry if u made one of these hcs and i dont credit you i love you sorry) ethan green

probably like 23? 25?

hes actually bi he told me himself

afab he/they boyflux sue me

lex is his first and only gf. he's probably had like one bf before but he loves lex sm more (simp) (malewife to her girlboss basically)

orphan sorry i dont make the rules

his dad left like immedately and his mom passed of old age when he was like 17 idk

hannah is basically his little sister. he'd die 4 her actually.

ted spankoffski

like late 20s early 30s at the most ithink

so painfully thirsty for anyone he has to be pan

amab he/him but doesnt really give a fuck

has never had a partner thats so sad. he makes up for this by constantly acting like everybody wants him. they dont. (exepct for me i love him)

doesnt really have a CRUSH on anyone speific but mark chastity is his fav to tease (sorry im a baby for holy bastard)

him and petes parents love them but theyre kinda like.. oblivious and absent. like theyre always on trips and leaving pete to live w ted

max jagerman

im not gonna list all of the teens' age theyre all 16-18

im assimilating with this one he/she pronouns amab

hes omni he told me himself pref 2 women

everybody wants him he only wants the nerd (hes just like me fr)

he isnt dead shut up shut up sHUT UP HES FINE OKAY

his dad is not good his mom died in childbirth

stephanie lauter

genderqueer. they/she/he in order of pref. also uses xe/xir idc sue me

pan thats cannon she told me xirself

does tiktok dances but really badly on purpose

the biggest simp on earth to her one guy and nobody ese

will fluster the living hell out of pete in public for fun

hates being the mayors daughter, feels alienated bcs of it

pete spankoffski

he/they afab i dont make the rules

bi if you argue youre homophobic (/J)

actually loves his big bro but acts like he doesnt bcsaude is ted hears him looking up ted he'll never hear the end of it

nickname seymour from ruth (bcause lsoh)

ex-brony

richie whateverhislastnameis

afab he/xe/nya/zap he would have so many cool neos. one of those people whos neo list is longer than the bill of rights

gay mlm yes

undertale enjoyer

nge enjoyer

discord mod in an anime server

owns several body pillows

xem and ruth have been friends since pre-k so they know eachother like the back of their hand

ruth whateverherlastnameis

afab she/they

omni large large large pref to girls. likes a few boys sorta

biggest theatre kid ever but sucks at acting and singing (the curse)

got ensemble ONCE and cried at the cast list

fav show is heathers

heather m kin i dont make the rules

grace chastity

afab she/her

bi

liked a girl once and cried for a week str8 abt going 2 hell

i dont have alot of hcs for her but i think she would like fire a large amount

not even arson wise but like

a firebug

tinky

i already made my hcs for all the LiBs' true forms so go find those if you want

all the libs dont give a fuc about pronouns call them whatever

i do he/him tho

tinky is really just a 13 yr old girl freaking out abt one specific guy (ted) and making fucked up fanfics with him (time bastard nmt)

the "youngest" of the siblings

boy jerry

i beleive that every character jon plays is related. boy jerry is pauls fucked up brother. which means hes also richies uncle

[rei-ismyname]

Ororo, late in the Genesis war, holding the Uranos Trigger like Yorick's skull, thinking about all she's seen and done after choosing to insert herself in this culture - 'Arakko doesn't have drama kids bc everyone is like that all the time. I've never felt so fucking alive. I wish everyone who made fun of my weather incantations and invocations to goddesses I'm related to could see me now. Exodus would love it here.'

Jon Ironfire, sweating bullets bc he's had the worst day of his life 3 weeks in a row + he is grieving his malewife who *entrusted him with his sword* - 'Why do you hesitate? If you're not strong enough to press the button to summon the demigod who killed half the planet like a month ago then I will!'

Ororo, waiting for Roberto to and to create suspense *WORDLESSLY FRIES THE TRIGGER TO SLAG WITH A HECTIC LIGHTING BOLT*

Roberto, nodding 'fuck yeah'

Fisher King, having constant PTSD flashbacks and overwhelmed by merging with a sentient swarm of insects plus the thousands of years of memories that come with it - stares at the giant fish and mutters incoherently.

Jon Ironfire, horrified - 'Why did you do that crazy and dramatic thing? I'm going to be rational and try to kill my malewife and his 99 ride or die soldiers by myself.'

Dick Rider (Nova) watches, appalled but trying to not be judgmental. He's grateful that he's immune to the call of Drama Kid Swag. Out of the corner of his eye he spots a plague arrow flying straight at Storm. He acts quickly and *undramatically*

Everyone is shocked but they totally get why he did it. It looked super cool. He's beyond fucked up though, and morale is low. They wonder if majoring in theatre was a useless degree, if it's incompatible with being a warrior. Silent prayers are mouthed, a sign is needed - a champion of violence and monologues. 'Magneto!' They think, but it's a forlorn hope. His heart was torn out last war, he kept himself alive using rage and dramatic timing - long enough to slay one final enemy and redefine philosophical deathbed soliloquies.

...

...

A portal opens.

The First Drama Kid. En Sabah Nerd. The ancient marriage of war and elocution. Favourite son of Space Gods. Slayer of Glee club. Cause of the Bronze Age Collapse. Having a wild act 3 face turn

[pardonmydelays]

how was tick tick boom?

oh, where do i even begin...

first of all, i need to say that our polish team did an amazing job (absolutely incredible & talented cast + the translation was really good, not perfect but good enough, more about it later tho). we really have amazing actors in this shitty country tbh & that only makes me want to see more of our productions.

i need you to take a look at this amazing set, because i am just so obsessed with it:

(if you look closely, you can spot les mis, phantom of the opera, west side story & cats on these walls hehe)

so first of all, this set, wonderful set, second of all, THE TICKING SOUND! you could hear it before the show even began and honestly i already had tears in my eyes.

let me tell you i am always that weirdo who cries at the very first song, so yes, i literally burst into tears when i heard the first notes of 30/90. it was also one of my favourite moments from the entire show, along with no more, sugar & why (and i knew i was gonna have a mental breakdown at why, because it's my favourite song from the show, but no more & sugar were a huge surprise for me because they are not my faves, the performance tho! the choreography! OMG!!! I NEED TO SEE THAT AGAIN!!!). the biggest disappointments when it comes to the songs were... green, green dress (not the performance, it's just the translation that didn't really work for me - for my polish mutuals, they translated it into "zielony cud" & i'm sorry but that's a nope for me) & boho days BECAUSE THEY LITERALLY REMOVED IT FROM THE SHOW??? the way i was blasting boho days on a loop days before seeing tick tick boom live & it wasn't even in the show, it's a fucking crime. the rest of the songs were great tho. i couldn't stop crying at come to your senses, that was the moment™️. 10/10, would recommend.

also, the theatre kid in me was literally thriving when jon asked the audience if they know who his musical theatre hero is, because he only said his first & last name starts with the letter S & a few people started screaming STEPHEN SONDHEIM! such a proud nerd moment for me! (tbh even the actor seemed to be surprised or maybe he was just acting lol i can't tell but it was so cool).

SPOILER ALERT!

i just need to mention it very quickly, at the very end of the show jon got a phone call from sondheim (which you all probably know about) & he said "you have a bright future ahead of you" & this line fucking destroyed me, like... i wasn't there for fun. i was there for jonathan larson. bright future you say... well. jon, you could have done so much more if you only had time... i will never stop crying about it, i'm sorry.

overall, it was such a beautiful show. as much as i love the movie, seeing it live in theatre is a whole other experience & it's truly life-changing. if you ever get a chance, go see it, please. it's totally worth it!

[starship--aurora]

episode one liveblog (sort of) let’s go

jon sims you dramatic fucker. /aff

did not miss the four minutes of ads LMAO

you can HEAR the contempt in his voice as he talks about gertrude.

”i don’t count martin” giggling, i love asshole jon.

”tim, sasha, and. yes, i guess, martin.”

ANGLERFISH ANGLERFISH ANGLERFISH.

”recording by jonathan sims, head archivist of the magnus institute, london” DUDE. i don’t know why that took me so aback.

mike. like michael. goddamnit jonny sims, what’s it with mikes and michaels.

THE STATIC.

“can i have a cigarette?”

i love the background music so much.

i remember thinking how much he got into it, how much of a theatre kid he seemed to be.

ANGLERFISH.

”i looked at their feet, and saw that they weren’t quite touching the ground.”

torch. i always forget that torches are the same thing as flashlights.

“statement ends, this was fucking stupid”

sasha mention <3

”look at this drunk creeper, ell-oh-ell.” i hate how he says lol, i don’t know what it is about it LMAO.

episode two!

JOSHUA GILLESPIE <3

i remember one time while rambling to my mother about joshua, she kept thinking i was saying “lesbian” and not “gillespie”.

got bored this is being continued hours later.

joshua gillespie you absolute fucker, i love you and want to kiss you on the mouth.

oh no, what ever shall you do, waking up with the key.

”perhaps a bit elaborate” Joshy Boy Elaborate Is What You Need.

”it’s odd how fear can become as routine as hunger.”

yeah, my living room coffin is making weird noises, Music Time.

ooo, knock knock.

hi john. surprised to see you, shocked to see me.

smash smash on the ground.

breekon and hope, let’s go. i love.

joshua gillespie, the hero. we salute you.

”it’s always nice to hear my hometown isn’t always devoid of odd happenings”

giggle that was great.

episode three!!

tmagp ad, oh em gee (<- this loser listened to tmagp premier today and is very normal about it)

”she sleeps with other women” what is this ad, i want to listen to this podcast. /hj

”rusty quill presents… the magnus archives…” stop with your verbal ellipsis, dude. LMAO

”jonathan sims, head archivist of the magnus institute, london”

GRAHAM!!!!! I love Graham so much.

”hey man, i always see you writing, how’s your notes coming along?” “i. i don’t take notes?”

sexy graham rights.

the amount of times i’ve had to rewind because i didn’t process it.

“hey graham” “HOLY SHIT”

public transport is scary, no judgement there.

i honestly never understood the statement giver’s discomfort with graham. to the point you couldn’t even let him see which building.

yeowch graham what did you do. 😔

“apparently he was gay.”

weird hooks weird hooks weird hooks woo.

graham’s notebooks 🥰.

graham honestly sounds like an interesting guy, i think if i’d ever met him, i’d befriend him.

TABLE. WAIT, IS IT THE TABLE USED TO TRAP NOTTHEM?

wait. wait wait wait. oh my god.

it is i think.

stalking your coworkers is Creepy. jon, please don’t take ideas. (jon then proceeds to take ideas)

driving through ohio at night is fun, ngl.

i saw him take one of his notebooks. he ate it.

wowza, all sexy gay people eat notebooks, do you eat notebooks?

“i even saw him freak out at the ice cream truck” that is honestly me. any loud sound? i panic like there’s no tomorrow

memorizing his pizza order <3

fuck capitalism. (“i had to drop out of the college course to work late nights”)

notthem notthem notthem wooohooo

okay i take it back, ohio backroads are NOT fun at night.

notthem <3

yeah i kinda. just stood there.

the background music slow rising!!

”from my months of watching” haha

not!graham!!

imposter? like…… among…

i love the description so much.

aw man, bye notebooks ✌���

hey amy, i’m going to come to your house.

statement ends!

tim mention ❤️❤️❤️.

“i trust coworker testimony as far as i can burn it.”

ohio hills and sharp turns at night are not fun, my stomach is in my throat.

JOURNAL JOURNAL JOURNAL JOURNAL

KEEP WATCHING.

[abelllia]

I posted 1,774 times in 2022

That's 1,724 more posts than 2021!

291 posts created (16%)

1,483 posts reblogged (84%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@hisclockworkservants

@ashes-in-a-jar

@samwise1548

@jewishjon

@beesabuzzin

I tagged 1,552 of my posts in 2022

Only 13% of my posts had no tags

#tma - 971 posts

#jon sims - 529 posts

#martin blackwood - 377 posts

#jmart - 266 posts

#abellrambles - 214 posts

#tma buns - 115 posts

#tim stoker - 80 posts

#the magnus archives - 69 posts

#sasha james - 66 posts

#jonathan sims - 62 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#tim's resentment towards him is understandable but at the same time i want to defend jon but at the sane time i it's understandable and at-

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

AU idea I had stewing for a while

[ID: A digital drawing of teenage Gerard Keay, Jonathan Sims, and Agnes Montague running away from an out-of-frame giant spider that is on fire. They all wear uniforms which consist of a white dress shirt, a green tie, a grey sweater vest, a dull green jacket, in Jon and Gerry's case black slacks and in Agnes' case a black above-the-knee skirt with black leggings, white socks, and brown leather shoes. On the top right is grey text that reads "The Kids Are Alright AU" with a smaller piece of text underneath it that reads "aka Highschool AU+Jon, Gerry, Agnes Friendship+They're Leitner Hunters." Gerard Keay is a white boy with mid-length pale blonde hair badly-dyed black, Jonathan Sims is a British-Indian boy with brown skin and dark brown hair, Agnes Montague is a white girl with long red hair./.End ID]

The vibes are Scooby Doo in Highschool except the ghosts they hunt are Leitners and also they're British (so I guess they're in Secondary School.) I just wanted to see them as troublemaking teens who have a penchant for solving mystery and arson. Luckily the mysteries of Jurgen Leitner provide avenues for both. Who is Jurgen Leitner? Why does he have so many fucked up (if true) books? Why are a shit ton of them popping up in and around school campus? That's what this trio want to find out! Feel free to ask questions since this AU is not like, 100% complete or set in stone. Might be fun.

943 notes - Posted August 21, 2022

#4

S1 v S4 JMart ft. Cat Jon

[Image ID: Two comics featuring Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood from The Magnus Archives.

The first comic is set in season one. The first panel has Martin cautiously approach Jon who is at his desk, reading a statement while holding a mug. Martin says "H-hey Jon! Here's the files you asked for-" Jon then hisses at Martin and jumps away in his seat for the second panel. He throws his hands over himself, spilling the contents of his mug in the process. Alarmed cat ears appear on him as well as a tail. Martin looks surprised and jumps away from Jon, holding his hand in the air and the files close to his chest.

The second comic is set during the Scottish Safehouse Period. Jon and Martin are in bed during early morning with their arms over each other, Jon's on top of Martin's. In the first panel, Martin is trying to reach for his glasses while saying "Jon...we need to start the day..." Jon then weakly hisses in the second panel. His arm clutches Martin's shoulder and the alarmed cat ears and tail appear again. In the third panel, Martin gives up on reaching for his glasses and instead hugs Jon back. He smiles and says "Fine. Five more minutes." Jon smiles back and two hearts float above him./.End ID]

Jonathan "Mah-tin" Sims is a cat confirmed. Did this instead of working on another piece lmao.

957 notes - Posted June 30, 2022

#3

Concept: Jon's grey hair is actually spider silk from his encounter with the Web

988 notes - Posted September 6, 2022

#2

Thank you to @intr0vrt3dextr0vert who gave me the suggestion "The S1 TMA crew (Sasha, Tim, Elias etc) going on a (regular lol) work bonding trip like going to the movies or something >:]"!

[Image ID: A digital drawing of the Season 1 Magnus Archives crew watching a movie in an empty theatre. On the left sits Elias, calmly steepling his fingers together and looking at the screen. An arrow points towards him with the text "secretly Watching the better movie next door." Next is Jon, who is sleeping and leaning his head against Martin who is seemingly watching the movie with a happy expression. The arrow pointing towards Jon has the text "bad sleeping habits finally caught up to him" while the arrow pointing to Martin says "*having an internal crisis rn*." Then comes Sasha who is mischievously looking at Jon and Martin while she hides her phone behind her bag of popcorn, implied to be taking a photo of the two. Her arrow and text reads "never a bad time for blackmail." Finally there's Tim who is staring intently at the screen while he leans over to take a bit of Sasha's popcorn as his container is empty. His arrow and text reads "actually paying attention to the damn movie." There is text at the bottom right corner of the image which says "POV: They're watching a bad movie" there is smaller text underneath it which says "(they bought out the whole house w/ institute money i guess?)" and another that goes "((or the movie really is just THAT bad)) ./.End ID]

The Ceaseless(?) Watchers

I have no idea what movie they're watching but Tim's invested anyway. I thought this was only going to take me a couple of minutes but it actually took a long while because

A. I forgot how hard it is to draw multiple characters in one scene

B. Low angle go brrr

But it was fun! The crew just hanging out and doing normal stuff for a change! Sure hope nothing happens to them ahahaha :)

1,177 notes - Posted July 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

One thing about Martin Blackwood that I think doesn't get brought up nearly as much as it should be is his love for "Retro" things.

Just Martin geeking out over things like rotary phones, 1950's dresses, polaroids, and all that stuff. Maybe he wears Cat Eye glasses to work? Who knows.

If you want JMart thoughts too imagine Martin going down to the Archives for his first day and seeing Jon in full grampa attire, wearing a bowtie like he's Carl Fredricksen from Up, and going "That's him. That's the man I'll fall for."

1,635 notes - Posted June 9, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[lightboundhellhound]

i decided to make a giant polycule because i got that bored

picrew

from left to right, top to bottom:

Shayne, he/him, looks a lot more intimidating than he actually is. total softie, giant pushover, so full of love <3

Danny, he/him, unlike shayne he looks a lot softer than he actually is. he dresses all cottagecore or whatever but it’s only so he can catch you off guard if you’re trying to start shit. loves confrontation <3

Rach (short for Rachel), she/he, chaos incarnate. so fucking weird. she will do just about anything if you dare him to. bubbly and energetic. it’s difficult to make her mad and he’s actually terrifying when she is

KC, she/her, butch with a green thumb. loves gardening more than anything. is very enthusiastic about making friends and tending to her friends needs

Tanya, they/them, gamer extraordinaire. they play a lot of fps games like apex legends, valorant, and the half life games. they also play things like fortnite, fnaf, minecraft, portals 1 and 2, and skyrim

Claire (short for Clarity), she/her (but really anything not he/him is fine), supreme overlord of negativity and bitchiness <3 she’s a mean ass conspiracy theorist stoner and i fucking love her

Garfield, he/him, mega garfield fanboy and kin. his entire personality is based around a fat orange cat who loves lasagna. fucking hates jon arbuckle

Kel, any pronouns, wants to be a broadway star <3 was The theatre kid in school and has not outgrown that energy. she loves bursting into song when it’s not strictly necessary

Craig, he/him, the cishet man who doesn’t know how he got here. he asked claire out not knowing what he was signing up for. she explained that she’s in a polycule but craig was undeterred, because he knew how he felt about her, and even if he’s never dated someone who he had to share, he knew it would be worth it. anyway, he’s a fucking loser and i don’t know what claire sees in him <3 he does nothing but sit around his apartment watching tv and playing video games and drinking red bull and also he gets into heated arguments on the internet (arguments he’s often wrong about btw). don’t worry, he’s a good guy, he just. has work to do

pls ask me about these little dudes i love them <3

under the cut is the chart depicting who’s with who and in what way

Red: romantic

Blue: sexual

Purple: queerplatonic

i know there are more ways i could’ve elaborated on their relationships and things can get a lot more complex in polycules than just three simple boxes, but i just did all this a few hours ago so it’ll take more time and character development to really iron out the details lmao

[supercasey]

What Your TMA OTP Says About You

By a dumb asexual who makes too many sex jokes

Jon/Martin: You project onto/kin at least one of these two fools, but no matter what, you are yearning for a relationship like theirs. You're also probably a theatre kid, at least spiritually.

Elias/Peter: You like the dynamic of Jonmartin, but you think it would be 10x better if Martin bullied Jon back and if they were both GILFs. You also probably have "Big Boy Man" as your ringtone.

Tim/Sasha: You believe that both of these characters deserved better, and you probably love the Archivist Sasha AU more than life itself. Also, Tim gets pegged.

Basira/Daisy: You are a hotbed of drama, which is completely unintentional on your part and you rarely participate in it at will; you just want some quality wlw content, and you will not be stopped from getting it.

Melanie/Georgie: You are completely done with Jon's shit, but you still find him somewhat endearing in his panic induced stupidity. You are also a wlw and want to live in a small apartment with your gf and cats, but only if the apocalypse is happening in the background.

Michael/Gerry: You like Jonmartin, but you also want to crank that shit to 100 and blast MCR in the background while they kiss. You also might kin Nico from PJO, and you are most certainly a scene kid.

Jon/Gerry: You are all about that sadboi content, and I honestly can't tell which of these depressed motherfuckers you kin, but I know you kin at least one of them.

Jon/Martin/Gerry: Same as Jonmartin, but you're dead certain that Gerry would be an amazing addition/middle man for them and that he would've gotten them into a relationship together by the end of season 1.

Gertrude/Agnes: There is literally nothing more heartbreaking yet addictive to you than starcrossed lovers that can never be together because of circumstances outside of their control. You're also gay.

Leitner/Gertrude: You honestly just find it so funny that Jonny Sims' parents voice these characters so that's why you ship them. You either hated or loved when they roasted Jon at the end of S3, there is no in-between.

Jude/Agnes: You are a Jude Perry kinnie/you want to set the world on fire beside the woman of your dreams. Probably a top.

Jon/Tim: You lived for the sassy bits between Tim and Jon in seasons 1-2 and you would give anything for Tim to have kissed Jon to shut him up midway through a rant.

Mike/Simon: You're here to love Mike Crew and fuck some GILFs. Press F to pay respects to our short king.

Jon/Michael: I don't know what's going on with you after S3, but dear God do you wanna fuck monsters, specifically if they look like a Bill Cipher humanization that you can only perceive while doing acid.

Jon/Elias: You are an Eliasfucker and you wear that badge with pride.

Martin/Peter: You are an Eliasfucker and you hide this fact at all costs. Also you probably have a very complicated relationship with your father.

Jon/Basira: You thought Tim was spot on about these two being good together; they're bookworm buddies!

Jon/Georgie: You cannot get enough of absolute off his shits college!Jon and frankly, good for you. You also want Georgie to peg you.

Melanie/Basira: Just a couple of gals being pals, and nothing is sexier than performing life-saving, non-consensual surgery on your GF so she doesn't start killing people... according to you, apparently.

Jonah/Barnabas: You heard Jonah say that he held affection for a character mentioned exactly one time even though he left him to die, and you went fucking feral. Tbh you just wanna get with a Victorian dude.

Jonah/Mordecai: This is just Elias/Peter but with more Victorian outfits and letters that would be considered incredibly scandalous, even for the era. Also it makes Elias/Peter 100x more uncomfortable, but I guess some people are into that???

Jon/Martin/Tim: Why be just friends when you can all be in a gay polyam relationship together and kiss? In other words, every fight between Tim and Jon has gutted you like a fucking fish.

Jon/Martin/Tim/Sasha: Same as before, but you stan the first season of the series so hard that people outside the fandom think it's an office comedy.

Gertrude/Elias: Somehow you came to the conclusion that if Elias got pegged then none of the bullshit in the series would've happened.

Melanie/Helen: You're similar to the Jon/Michael shippers in that you wanna fuck monsters, but more like the kind of monsters that make your eyes bleed and your brain melt when you fully perceive them.

Jon/Helen: You either started shipping this as a joke or to cope with the death of Michael, there is no in-between.

Jon/Nikola: You heard Jon admit that he got daily, fully body lotion massages from Nikola and you lost your fucking mind. Clownfucker.

Breekon/Hope: Breekon's statement made you cry for a hundred thousand years, and you will never be over it. Fuck getting a bunch of divorces like Lonelyeyes, you wanna stay with your soulmate until the end of time!

Nikola/Jane Prentiss: You want more wlw content, but specifically you want them to be cartoonish supervillains who can't stop kissing each other in the middle of trying to murder Jon.

Alright, that's all the one's I'm doing. Please don't send me any hate, these are all just meant to be jokes!

[tentativelyteal]

Why the tapes can't be all Web's

tl:dr The Tapes are hardly the Web's; they belong to Jon, and Martin, and Sasha, and Tim, and Basira, and Daisy, and Melanie, and Georgie, and Gerry, and- you get the idea

~long ramblings beneath, stuff we all actually know already, but I had to get this out because I don't think Annabelle saying tapes are the Web in 197 cheapens the narrative even just looking into the narrative itself for clues~

First of all, it's not even confirmed in 197

[ep197 transcript ID; emphases mine]

BASIRA: So. The tapes. They're from the Web, then?

ARCHIVIST: Looks like it.

BASIRA: Were they always? Right from the start?

ARCHIVIST: As far as I can tell, it's hard to s- If I look too closely at them, my own voice, things get... recursive, hard to follow.

BASIRA: I always assumed they were with The Eye. The whole 'watching, listening, waiting' thing, y'know?

ARCHIVIST: No, they were always using them to spin their own web. Out of my voice.

BASIRA: Mine too.

Jon says 'looks like it' and 'as long as I can tell, it's hard to s[ay]' - doesn't sound definite to me, and as much as I love you, Jon, you've been mistaken before. And I know Annabelle refers to the tapes as the Web's ('our tapes'), but Annabelle, as much as I love you, you, eh, lie/lie by omission all the time.

And it's interesting that Jon says: 'If I look too closely at them, my own voice, things get... recursive, hard to follow'. When have we seen Jon not able to see something (that's not artifically shielded or that's/who's severed connections with the fears)? When he realised that the Eye cannot see within itself. But I want to push it further to say that it's not only the Eye Jon cannot See into, but he also can't See into himself. First, because the tapes aren't connected to the Eye - he says as much in his next line, but also the Eye has only ever needed statements read/said aloud, not necessarily recorded. Second, and more importantly because even though the Web might have been 'always using them to spin their own web', but, BUT, to begin with, the tapes are Jon's words and Jon's own voice. And Basira makes a point to say: Mine too. Like, hello? This strong use of possessive is just too big to ignore.

And then, of course, we get to the most horrifying part of victimisation, laid out coldly in third person as if Jon weren't standing right there:

ANNABELLE: (...) And then, we took his voice.

ARCHIVIST: No...

ANNABELLE: His, and those he walked with.

But it's his voice, the tapes are his voice, his! His, first and foremost. Not yours, not the Web's, not even the Eye's - you all can just fuck off, you thieves and robbers. It's his! His, and those he walked with. And I think - though I'm probably just over-interpreting - but I think it's important that right when Annabelle states: 'we took his voice', as if that were the be all and end all, we have Jon literally interjecting with his voice: 'No...' Yes, in this context, it's a horrified and disbelieving 'No', but I think it carries weight. It has to carry weight.

Can we also just recap (an inexhaustive list of) the things that the tapes have been?

Okay, so they've been: used by the Web, okay, big deal, so what

Voices and words of Jon, Martin, Tim, Sasha, Melanie, Basira, Daisy, Georgie, Gerry, you get the idea. And not just statements!! We've got conversations that have nothing to do with feeding the fears! We've even got The Admiral purring! Like?!

Special honorary mention 1: The only thing they/we have left of Sasha James

Special honorary mention 2: Martin K. Blackwood's poetry

Anchor, of course, anchor. Do you mean to tell me the tapes worked as an anchor in ep132 'Entombed' because they belong to the Web? Seriously. And the tapes are portrayed as parallel to Jon's rib - literally a part of Jon's self.

Memories.

[ep170 Transcript ID]

MARTIN: (to tape) Do you remember? You store them, I suppose. Keep, keep stuff locked up in those little wheels. That's memory, isn't it? (movement) Computers used to be like you. Big, whirring things with loads of - uh, tape. They called that memory.

They are memories, which is also why they belong to the characters.

They are memories, which is also why Jon first chose to record everything that happened.

[ep39 Transcript ID; emphases mine]

ARCHIVIST: I do! I did. I just... I don't want to become a mystery. I refuse to become another goddamn mystery.

SASHA: What?

ARCHIVIST: Look, even if you ignore the walking soil-sack out there, and the fact that we are probably minutes from death, there are still so much more happening here.

MARTIN: I'm not sure we can really ignore the-

ARCHIVIST: Every real statement just leads... deeper into something I don't even know the shape of yet. And to top it all, I still don't know what happened to Gertrude. Officially she's still missing, but Elias is no help and the police were pretty clear that the wait to call her dead is just a formality. If I die, wormfood or... something else, whatever, I'm going to make damn sure the same doesn't happen to me. Whoever takes over from me is going to know exactly what happened.

Just, listen to his conviction. It's his choice. Just give him that.

These all might sound like wishful-thinking, just me being naive holding onto something that's actually nothing, and railing against machinations of eldritch fears. But. But I think what the characters believe is happening - and what we believe is happening - actually matters? That's the whole point sanctioned by what the story's actually told us, time and time again? Because, let's take a look at another tidbit from 197 that's been scaring us:

[ep197 Transcript ID]

ANNABELLE: I would either travel with them, or I would die. I do not know which. My life is only sustained by The Web. Most would simply lose whatever power they have been gifted.

Jon would lose much of himself, the part of him that are The Eye. But he would survive. And perhaps more importantly, he would remain who he believes himself to be. And you would end the suffering of all those others who remain here.

Annabelle! Avatar of the Web, which usually would have us all think that we're all just manipulated! Actually says that the most important thing is who Jon believes himself to be! What we believe!

And finally, of course:

The tapes are the podcast. We all know that.

But that means, what we believe the tapes to be matters. Because that's what we believe the podcast, the whole story, is about. Is the whole story the Web's? I don't fucking think so.

The Web says, hey, here are the tapes that the fears can latch onto so that they can travel out with it, or be dragged, like some parasites.

Well, Jon, like the theatre kid he is, might say the tapes are actually like Horatio,

If thou didst ever hold me in thy heart

Absent thee from felicity a while,

And in this harsh world draw thy breath in pain

To tell my story

The tapes are here to tell his story, to tell all their stories.

(I only hope Martin won't turn out to be metaphorically or literally the tapes)

[foreverfangirlalways]

Sander Sides High School Host Club

Sanders Sides OHSHC-

This is simply a bullet fic for a Sanders Sides version of Ouran High School Host Club. Everyone is Supernatural except for Virgil, and if y’all like it enough, I will turn it into a full fledged fic. Just let me know!!

-_-_-_-

Original Character= Sander Side -supernatural identity- tattoo that shows supernatural identity Haruhi=Virgil -human- ??? Tamaki=Janus -shapeshifter- dice surrounded by various shapes Kyouya=Logan -vampire- fangs with a moon and cross Hikaru=Patton -Cupid- bow&arrow w/ heart Kaoru=Emile -Siren- musical notes with emoji Hunny=Roman -fae- willow tree and red mushrooms Mori=Remy -sandman- hourglass combines with a sandstorm Renge=Remus -fae- willow tree and green mushrooms

-_-_-_-

~A bunch of freaking people talking loudly in a freaking library!~

Virgil – [Sigh] ~This place has four library rooms. You'd think one of them would be quiet.~

~How are things in heaven Andy? I can't believe it's been ten years already. I'm beginning to think that rich kids only come to school to have a good time.~

~An abandoned living room. I guess this is the only place I'll be able to study in peace and quiet.~

[Gets buried in an avalanche of petals]

Sides Host Club – "Welcome!"

Virgil– ~When I opened the door, I found the Host Club.~

Janus *background/narration/janus answer to Virgil’s ‘whaaa???’*– "Only those with excellent social standing, filthy rich families, and are supernatural creatures are lucky enough to spend their time here at the elite private school, Sides Academy. The Sides Host Club is where the school's handsomest boys, with too much time on their hands, entertain other handsome boys who also have way too much time on their hands. Just think of it as Sides Academy's elegant playground for the super-rich, supernatural, and beautiful."

Virgil – "This is a cult?"

Patton– "Oh wow, it's a new boy!"

Logan – "Patton, Emile, I believe this young man is in the same class as you, isn't he?"

Emile– "Yeah, but he's so shy and quite! He doesn't act very sociably, so we don't know much about him."

Logan – "Hm. Well, that wasn't very polite." "Welcome to the Sides Host Club, Mr. Honor Student."

Janus – "What? You must be Virgil Storm! You're the exceptional honor student we've heard about."

Virgil – "How did you know my name?"

Roman– "Why, you're infamous. It's not every day that a commoner gains entrance into our academy. You must have a lot of nerve to work hard enough to fight your way into this school as an honor student cutie."

Virgil– "Boi, excuse me?"

Janus – "You're excused. You're a hero to other poor people, Storm. You've shown the world that even a poor person can excel at an elite private academy. It must be hard for you to constantly be looked down upon by others."

Virgil– "Ahhh, you’re that type of asshole. I think you're taking this "poor" thing too far."

Janus – "Spurned. Neglected. But that doesn't matter now. Long live the poor! We welcome you poor man, to our world of beauty."

Virgil– "Bitch, bye. I'm outta here."

Patton– "Hey! Come back here BFF Virgil! You must be like a superhero or something. That's so cool!"

Virgil– "I'm not a hero. I'm an honor student. And who are you calling "BFF Virgil!?"

Janus – "I never would've imagined the famous scholar would be so openly gay."

Virgil – "Openly what? BITCH WE’RE ALL GAY! There are no girls at this school! It’s like, a requirement or something!"

Janus *not listening*– "So tell me what kind of guys you're into. Do you like the strong, silent type? Because we don’t have that. We have Remy instead.

Remy- “You got that right babes. Silence is weakness. That’s why I always be slurping Starbees! *siiiippppp*”

Janus- Then there’s the boy Lolita? That’s Pat and Em! How about the princely type, Roman, or the cool nerd type, Logan?"

Virgil– "None! I was just looking for a quiet place to study."

Janus – "Or maybe... You're into a guy like me. *winky winky nudge nudge* What do you say?"

Virgil– "I will slap you. Back away!"

~Joan enters to see what the club was up too, and hears a ‘crackboom’. He turns to the noise, and sees the club standing over his broken vase.

Joan- “BROOOOOOOO! No effin' way, dude! Who broke this vase? Who broke this vase? Seriously, guys. Everyone who's here at my awesome party... this huge crowd of people that's definitely here right now...”

Virgil- *Mumbling* “Oh my go- wait, are they drunk? Why are they talking like that?”

Joan- “Somebody broke my grandma's vase. And that was the last thing she gave to me... to sell for about 75 thousand dollars! I swear to all things football and/or skateboarding that I will find you. Don't make me cry these incredibly manly tears! Anyone can speak up here and be a part of this scene. Especially those of us who aren't imagined and are actually here on the stage.”

Janus, Logan, Patton, Emile, Roman, and Remy all facepalm.

Joan- “Like, not the people who are imagined to be here through means of suspension of disbelief.”

Logan- I do not understand theatre. Joan, you don’t have to practice your script right now! Besides, you literally watched Virgil break it.”

Joan- “True, but I was very convincing! Now, ima go, but y’all should have the new guy do indentured servitude or something, because that’s the typically way a teenager pays for breaking a vase. Bye!”

All- “Bye Joan!”

Virgil- *gulping and looking around the room*"Uh, I'm gonna have to pay you back."

Remy – "With what money? Babes, you can't even afford a school uniform."

Roman – "What's with that grubby outfit you've got on anyway?"

Virgil- “Hmm, don’t like you either asshat.”

Logan – "Well, what do you think we should do Janus?"

Janus– "There's a famous saying you may have heard Virgil, "When in Rome, you should do as the Romans do." Since you have no money, you can pay with your body!”

Virgil- *raises an eyebrow, flips him off, and moves to leave*

Logan- *grabbing Virgil’s arm and pulling him back* “He doesn’t mean like that! He means-“

Janus- * interrupting* “That means starting today, you're the Host Club's errand boi!"

(Scene change)

Virgil– ~I don't know if I can handle this Andy. I've been captured by a bunch of boys that are calling themselves a host club.~ [Indistinct chattering] Brian– "Um, Janus, what's your favorite song?"

Janus– "What song? The one that reminds me of you, of course."

Steve (the stove) – "I baked you a cake today. Would you like to taste it?"

Janus– "Only if you'll feed it to me darling."

Bill (the drill) – "Oh wow. You're so dreamy."

Chad – "May I have a word with you Janus?"

Janus and Bill – "Huh?"

Chad– "I've recently heard the Host Club is keeping a little kitten without a pedigree."

Janus– "I don't know if I'd call him that. Speak of the devil! Thanks for doing the shopping Count Woe-laf! Did you get everything on our list?"

Virgil– "What? If Roman can’t call me that neither can you. Now here’s your food."

Remy– "Hey, wait a minute, what is this?"

Virgil– "Just what it looks like. It's coffee."

Remy – "I've never seen this kind before. Is this Dunkin Donuts?"

Virgil – *rolling his eyes* "Holy fucking shit. It's just Krueger coffee pods. I even got Starbucks brand!”

Everyone– "It's coffee pods?"

Remy – "Whoa! I've heard of this before. It's commoners' coffee. You just place it into a machine."

Steve – "I didn't know there was such a thing."

Brian – "So it's true then. Poor people don't even have enough money to buy Starbucks from Starbucks!"

Chad – "Mm hmm!"

Virgil- “No, it’s just Starbucks coffee pods. For home. It’s convenient you preppy asshats.”

Logan– *winks* "Commoners are pretty smart and convenient."

Roman – "68 cents per pod?"

Patton – "That's a lot less than we normally pay!"

Virgil – "I'll go back and get regular Starbucks. Excuse me for not knowing y’all orders."

Remy – "No, I'll keep it."

Crowd – [Gasp]

Remy– "I'm going to give it a try."

Crowd – [Gasp]

Remy – "I will drink this coffee!"

Crowd – [Applause]

Remy – "Alright Virgil, get over here and make me some of this commoners' coffee."

Virgil– ~I hate all these damn rich people.~

Chad– "Oh Janus, Logan, now they’re taking the joke too far. His palate won't be able to stomach that crap. Y’all don't have to drink it just because he bought it."

Virgil- "With all do respect, what?"

Chad*verychadlike* – "I'm sorry. I was talking to myself."

Virgil– "Bitc-"

Emile– "Virgil!"

Virgil – "Eh, I'm comin'" "Here."

Remy – "Let the tasting begin."

Brian – "I'm a little scared to drink this stuff."

Jon – "I'm afraid if I drink this my father will yell at me."

Roman– "What if I let you drink it from my mouth?"

Jon – "Well then I would drink it."

Guys – [Squealing]

Virgil – ~This is ridiculous.~

(Scene change)

Emile– [Giggle] "So he had a cookie jar hidden in our room."

Patton– "Emile! Don't tell them that story. I asked you not to tell anyone that. Why are you so mean to me?"

Emile– "I'm sorry Patton."

Guys – [Gasp]

Emile – "I didn't mean to upset you, but you were so adorable when it happened, I had to tell them. I'm sorry."

Patton– "I forgive you."

Guys – [Squeal] "I've never seen roommate love quite like that."

Virgil– "What are they so excited about? I just don't get it."

Roman – [dramatic entrance] "Sorry, we're running late."

Jon – "Hello Roman. Hey Remy."

Apollo – "We've been waiting here for you guys, hi"

Roman– "I'm sorry. I was waiting for Remy to finish his party plans and I simply couldn’t leave a man behind! *wrapping his arms around Remy* especially not the handsomest prince in the world!"

Guys – [Gasp] "So cute!" [Giggling]

Virgil– "Is Roman really a prince?"

Logan – "Roman may seem dramatic, but he is a fae prince."

Virgil – "Really? Damn."

Logan– "And then Remy allure is he’s a sassy, coffee-addicted sandman."

Virgil- "Interesting... tell me more?"

Logan- “Well, Emile is a siren. Patton is a Cupid.”

Virgil-*suprised Pikachu face* “seriously?”

Patton– "Vergie!"

Virgil– [Yelp]

Patton– "Hey Virgie, do you want to go have some cookies with me?"

Virgil– "Thanks, but I don't really like cookies."

Emile– "Then how would you like to hold my Stitch?"

Virgil– "I'm not into stuffed animals."

Emile– "Don’t worry! Stitch isn’t a mere stuffed animal! You look stressed. Stitch is enchanted, he brings luck and happiness to the holder.”

Virgil– [Gasp] "Well, I guess it wouldn’t hurt?"

Emile and Patton– [Gasp] *REALIZATION!* "Take good care of him, okay?" [Laugh]

Logan– "You'll notice that our club utilizes each man's unique characteristics to cater to the desires of our guests. Just so you know, Janus is number one around here. He's the king. Just don’t tell Roman. Janus’s request rate is 70%."

Virgil- "What's this world coming to? So, what is he?"

Logan- “Janus is a shapeshifter.”

Virgil- “Figures”

Logan– "And in order for you to pay off your 75 thousand dollar debt with us, you will act as the Sides Host Club's errand boy until you graduate. You can try to run away if you want to Virgil, but just so you know, I can find you anywhere you go. By the way, do you have a passport?"

Virgil – "Huh? What does that matter? And how could you find me? You never told me what you are."

Logan: “oh, of course. *smiles slowly, showing fangs.* “I’m a vampire.”

Virgil~eyes widened. Crap. Why does the one I like best have to be the most dangerous?~

Janus – "You're going to have to work hard to pay off that debt, my little emo." [Blow]

Virgil– [Hyperventilating] "Please don't do that again. Fight or flight, I will punch you."

Janus– "You need a makeover or no guys going to look twice at you."

Virgil – "You seem to be looking at me just fine. Besides, I’m not trying to get guys to look at me."

Janus– "Are you kidding me? That's the most important thing. You have to learn to be a gentleman and please the masses, like me."

Virgil– "I just don't think it's all that important."

Janus– "Hm?"

Virgil– "Why should I care about appearances and labels anyway? I mean, all that really matters is what's on the inside right? I don't understand why you even have a host club like this."

Janus– "It's a cruel reality, isn't it?

Virgil– [Grunt]

Janus– "It's not often that God creates a perfect person like moi, beautiful both inside and out."

Virgil– "And vein all around?"

Janus– "I understand how you feel since not everyone is blessed as I am, but you must console yourself. Otherwise how would you go on living? And think about this Virgil. Why do you think they put works of art in museums? Because beauty should be shared with the world, and those born beautiful should-“

Virgil-(~There's a word to describe people like him.~)

Janus- “promote other beautiful things. That's why I started this club in the first place. I did it for those who are-“

Virgil-(~Hmm. What is it?~)

Janus- “starved for beauty. For those working day and night, pursuing beauty. And although

Virgil-(~Aw man, I wish I could remember that word. Hmmm~)

Janus-“your looks may be average, and you have a few negative characteristics, I've chosen to share my expertise with you. Here's a tip. When setting down your glass, extend your pinky finger as a cushion, and that way when you set it down you won't be making a lot of noise. Gentlemen do not make loud sounds. Besides,” Virgil-(~"a pain in the neck"?~)

Janus-“a gentleman looks much more refined”

Virgil-(~No, there's something that fits him perfectly, better than that~)

Janus-“that way. I like to check my reflection.., but above all else ? Virgil, you must remember, how effective a glance to the side can be.”

Virgil- “Ha. I got it!”

Janus-“Oh, did I strike a chord?”

Virgil- You’re Obnoxious!"

Janus*sulking*

Virgil – "Uh, I'm sorry Janus. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings."

Roman and Remy– [Laugh]

Roman– "You're a hero alright."

Remy – "Uh-huh."

Virgil– ~But he is a pain in the neck.~ "I'm sorry Jan, but your lesson did strike a small chord with me."

Janus– "Really? It did? Let me teach you more, my friend."

Virgil– "Well, he got over that quick."

Janus- “Emile!”

Emile – "Boss?"

Janus– "Call me King."

Roman- “Nope, that’s me! Try again.”

Janus- “Fine. Call me Emperor Now where was I?”

Emile– “I think you were wanting to make Virgil a host. You can teach him all the basics of hosting..."

Patton– "But he's not going to get very far with the fellas if he doesn't look the part you know. HE NEEDS A MAKEOVER!!!"

Virgil– "I thought I already vetoed that?"

Roman– "Yes! Maybe if we moved his bangs out of his eyes it could help."

Virgil– "Hey! I happen to like bangs in my eyes! STEP AWAY FROM THE BRUSH! NO!!!"

Remy Attack Virgil with a hairbrush

Remy realization*

Logan– [Gasp] "Remy."

Remy – "Got it!"

Virgil– "Huh? Bitch what the hell is going on??" [Yell]

Roman– "Emile, what’s the number to my hairstylist?“

Patton – "What about me Lolo?"

Logan– "Patton."

Patton– "Yes sir!"

Logan– "You... go make some cookies."

Patton – "Ok! Virgil, what’s your favorite type of cookie?? You know what, I’ll just make them all!"

Remy – "Here! Change into this uniform."

Virgil– "What? Why?"

Remy– "Don't ask questions!"

Virgil– "No way! Screw you! You know what, I'll change, but you have to GET OUT!"

Remy – [Yell] [Stutter] "Huh?"

Logan– [Sigh]

(Scene change)

Virgil– "Um, guys?"

Janus– "Aren't you done changing yet?"

Logan– "Hmmm?"

Virgil– "You sure it's really okay for me to keep this uniform?"

Patton– "Cute! You're super pretty! Adorable!"

Emile– "Verge, you look so cute!"

Roman– "If we had known that's how you really look..."

Remy– "We would've helped you out sooner. You’re actually pretty hot..."

Logan– "Who knows? Maybe he'll draw in some customers. And I agree, he is extremely aesthetically appeasing."

Janus – "You know, that's just what I was thinking. Our errand boy is moving up the ranks. Starting today, you are an official member of the Host Club. I will personally train you to be a first-rate host. If you can get 100 customers to request your service, we will completely forget about your $75,000 debt."

Virgil – "A host? You people are fucking crazy. And I don’t want you to train me. You are an asshole."

Logan- “Janus? Do you mind if I train him? It could be educational.”

Janus- *slightly offended snake sounds* “If you can get the ungrateful, sassy, mean emo to agree, you can train him.”

Logan- “Virgil, can~”

Virgil- “I’ll let the hot nerd train me. I like him.”

Everyone looks between an extremely pleased Logan and a smug Virgil. ‘Interesting’

(Insert fluffy, flirty Analogical scene of Virgil learning how to be a ‘proper host’ and the others spying)

(Scene change)

Alfredo– "So, tell me Virgil. Do you have any hobbies? What do you like to do?"

Herbert– "I'm curious, what kind of products do you use on your skin?"

Boy(I’m running out of Thomas’s male character names)– "Yes, it's so pretty."

Virgil– ~I can't do this anymore. I’m sorry Logan, but I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. And these people are staring to get annoying. And invasive...~

Boys – "So why did you join the Host Club Virgil?" [Giggle]

Virgil– "Uh." ~All I have to do is get 100 customers to request me, and they'll forget about my $75,000 debt. I just have to seem interesting. Oh! I know just the story.~

(Words)

Alfredo – "I see, your brother was sick and passed away two years ago. Who do you bond with now?"

Virgil– "Oh, I‘m just kind of by myself now. My brother was my best friend and confidante, so I found it hard to make friends since he passed. Now all I have is my Uncle, but he is pretty great, and I have managed to make it through okay."

Herbert – "So uh..."

Boy – "Is it okay if tomorrow..."

Alfredo – "We request to sit with you again?"

Virgil– "Yeah, I'd really appreciate that guys. Y’all are great listeners, and I am interested to hear about y’all next time." *smirk*

Boys- [stifled shrieking]

Roman – "Why is he so popular?"

Logan– "He's a natural."

Janus– "Apparently he didn’t even need training."

Chad– "Have you forgotten about me?"

Janus – "Oh, no. Sorry prince. I'm just a little concerned about our newest host."

Chad – "Well that's obvious Jan. You and Logan sure have been keeping an eye on him."

Janus – "Of course. I have to. I need to make sure he a good host, and Logan is training him to be a gentleman."

Boys – [Giggling]

Janus – "Virgil! Come here for a minute."

Virgil– "What's up?"

Janus– "I'd like you to meet someone. This is my regular guest, Prince Chad."

Virgil– [Gasp] ~It's that asshole from earlier~ "Sir, it's a ‘absolute’ pleasure to meet you."

Janus – "That was so cute! That air of bashfulness was very good! Super good! Amazingly good!"

Chad – "Uh, Logan, what is happening?"

Logan– "Virgil is adorable, so Janus is trying to show affection and make Virgil like him better than me."

Virgil– "Roman! Save me!"

Janus – "Nope, mine now!"

Roman– *Whacks Janus with his sword and grabs Virgil bridal style* [Realization Gasp]

Janus– "Damn it Roman, you didn’t have to go that far. Come on little emo, let your best friend give you a big hug."

Virgil– "Ok. Patton! Janus says I need a hug."

Laughing and offended noises, then Patton jumping in Virgil arms for a giant hug. Guests are very amused, and Chad is very pissed

(Scene change)

Virgil-"Hey, what happened to my bag? [looks out window and sees bag in fountain] Uh, are you kidding me? How did that happen? I didn't think there were bullies at this school. I guess those asshats are everywhere. They’re like McDonalds."

Virgil runs towards the fountain

Chad – "Oh! It's you again. I bet you love having Janus and Logan making you over and fawning over you. It's useless though. You're always going to be a second-class citizen.”

Virgil – ~I bet my Tim Burton posters that he is the bastard that threw my bag in the fountain. I can't be bothered with him right now though. I've gotta find my wallet or I won't have any money for food this week.~

Remy– "Hey, tiny emo! You've got some nerve skipping out on the club like that. Why is your bag all wet?"

Virgil– "It's no big deal. I got it. I just can't find my food money."

Remy– "Hm?"

[jumps into the fountain after taking off his sunglasses]

Virgil– "Hey, you don't have to do that. You'll get wet. And why the hell did you only take off your sunglasses? That does nothing!"

Remy – "A little water never hurt anyone. Besides, people are always telling me that I'm dripping with good looks. Oh, hang on a second. This what you're looking for? What's the matter, you're staring off into space. Ooo! Please tell me your falling for me. Because Logan is gonna be pissed! "

Virgil– "No way!"

Remy– "How did your bag end up in the fountain anyway?"

Virgil– "Well uh, I guess I accidentally dropped it out the window at some point."

(Scene change)

Chad – "Oh really? That must've been terrible. I can't imagine what I'd do if my bag fell into the fountain."

Virgil – ~Why did he request me when it's obvious he doesn't like me? He has a plan. Ima end up decking this guy...~

Chad– "And you actually made Remy search that dirty old thing with you. How astonishing! You do realize he's a blueblood and not a commoner, right? The only reason any of them are paying attention to you is because they’re trying to turn you into a gentleman."

Virgil– [Gasp] ~Dis bitch wanna get punched ~

Chad– "Don't start thinking he cares about you just because he's doting on you."

Virgil– "Now I understand. You're jealous of me."

[grabs Virgil’s arm and yanks to where Virgil knocks the table over and lands on top of Chad]

Chad – [Scream] "No, Virgil! Leave me alone! Somebody help, he just attacked me!"

Virgil– "Bitch please."

Chad– "Somebody do something! Teach this commoner a lesson!"

[Emile and Patton dump water on the two]

Virgil– "Honestly, what the fuck is with you guys?"

Chad – "Why did you do that? Do something, Janus. Virgil just assaulted me."

Janus – "I'm disappointed in you. You threw his bag into the fountain, didn't you?"

Chad – "You don't know that. Do you have any proof that I did?"

Remy- “Yeah, babes, we got proof. It’s called we’re not fucking stupid. Or blind.”

Logan– "You know, you're a handsome guy, but you aren't classy enough to be our guest. If there's one thing I know, Virgil is not that kind of a man."

Chad– "But, why? You are all idiots!" [Cry]

Janus– "Hmmm... Now how am I going to punish you? Because it is your fault after all. Your quota is now 1000!"

Virgil– "Huh? 1000? My fault? Why yo-"

Patton– "Come on. I got high expectations for you, kiddo!"

Virgil– "Really?"

Emile– "Yep! This is the only spare uniform we have. Sorry, but it's better than a wet one, right?"

Virgil– "Thanks a lot you guys. I'm gonna go change."

(Scene change)

Janus – "Virgil, here you go. I brought you some towels."

Virgil– [Gasp] “Please get the hell out!”

Janus blanches and leaves

Virgil walks out in the uniform that shows ones supernatural identity tattoo. It shows off storm clouds and lightning, a rare tattoo but one that’s signifies humanity.

Janus– "Virgil."

Virgil– "Yeah?"

Janus– "So, you're a human?"

Virgil– "No shit Sherlock, yeah. Is there anything wrong with that?"

Janus– “No! I think you are awesome even if you’re human. Who else knows?”

Logan, Patton, Emile, Remy, and Roman all raise their hands

Janus-[Scream]

Virgil– "Listen guys, I don't really care whether you recognize me as a human or not. In my opinion, it's more important for a person to be recognized for who they are rather than for what supernatural identity you have."

Everyone nods

Virgil– ([Stammering]) "Uh, you know, I have to say Logan, I thought you were pretty cool earlier."

Logan– [Stammering]

Virgil *blushing*- “Logan, I know that you figured it out as soon as you saw me. Thank you for not saying anything, that was very cool of you.”

Logan *also blushing* -“Ah, umm, ehh, it is no problem. You’re welcome.”

Emile, nudging Patton and both giggling– "Well isn't this an interesting development?"

Roman and Remy – "Oh, yeah."

Janus – "Now, I could be wrong but I think we may be witnessing the beginnings of love here. Can’t believe that nerd stole the hot emo right out from under me with words. Ssssssssuck up!"

Patton- “Janus, kiddo, your name isn’t Jealous.”

Remy- “Yeah! Calm thy snaktitties.”

Roman- “Snake tits. Snake titties. Snitties.”

Roman and Remy- “OH MY GOSH SNITTIES!”

Emile- “Common guys. We are not a love to hate tumblr post.”

Roman and Remy- *chanting* “SNITTIES, SNITTIES, SNITTIES, SNITT-“

Janus- *chasing Roman and Remy around with a broom* “SAY IT ONE MORE DAMN TIME!”

Virgil- “You know, this might be fun, I actually enjoy being a Host...”

Taglist-

@dragonwithproblems

@five-falseh00ds-ph0nated

@thefingergunsgirl

@kawaiikat54

@sanders-sides-with-quinn

@007ardra

@yikesdodson

@nerdycupcake559

@softestvirgil

@teacupfulofstarshine

@impatentpending

@star-crossed-shipper

@ravenivy2079

@rainbowemonightmare

@ladyartemisia28

@mushroom-dance-mushroom-dance

@resident-trash-goblin

@parx-boiiz

@ninathepancake

@kuroyurishion

@spideythenewkid

@funkyfreshfatherfigure

@pattoncake-and-eyeshadow 

@drewwwbydoobydoo

@sure-i-exist

@sophiexteresa

@glitched-cookie

@wellhellothere09

@seraphlies

[bag-chips]

(Apologies for the length, messy handwriting poor quality uwu)

I binged all the Mechanisms albums in one day and became utterly obsessed with the idea of them being Jon’s uni band. On top of this I got thinking about the theatre lines in MAG 172. Ergo, here’s a master post of various Mechanism!Jon and Theatre!Jon scenarios! (it’s mainly Jonmartin fluff I’m not going to lie to you). It took four days. Last night I stayed up till nearly four trying to get it done cos I hate myself ;)

1) My design for Mechanism Jon. He’s absolutely one of those guys who grow excessive facial hair to look older and more mature. And, oh look! Some JonGeorgie stuff. Rather than being a member of the band, I’d like to think she acts as the behind the scenes manager, helping out with bookings lighting and costumes. It will become apparent that Jon is like my fave and I’m soft for this stupid little man.

2) Depressed S3 Jon with the Admiral. Jon prefers to not talk about the band, especially since most of the Archival staff make fun of him for it anyway. However, he absolutely ends up quoting Mech songs when he’s on his own, especially when emotionally compromised. The aftermath of this little sketch would be Jon spitting out the whisky and nearly throwing up because he hates the taste and can only really stand very weak alcoholic drinks (hey hi hello I’m projecting).

Stupid sketch of him taking part in a Shakespeare production. Jon was and still is a theatre kid, taking part in any play or musical he could during his uni years. He’s a dramatic little bitch but damn does he have a fantastic stage pressence. Georgie proudly supports him from behind the curtain.

3) Martin finds out about the Mechanisms through Tim, who uses the material to expertly tease Jon. Martin finds pictures. Martin’s crush is cemented he is homosexual he is transfixed by the images. This leads to him listening to the albums, which outside of them being by his crush he genuially does love them. He often finds himself listening to them whilst working around the Archives, but takes great efforts to hide his love of the Mechs from a curious Jon.

4) Everyone at the Archives knows about the band. Tim and Melanie are the lead culprits in mocking him about it, especially in the tense work environment of S3. (For context Mechanism shows had the tradition of Jonny De’Ville claiming he was the captain, with Gunpowder Tim and the audience then proclaiming that no he’s the first mate Jonny stop Jonny no. Go listen to the Death of the Mechanisms you’ll see).

5) Post-MAG172 argument. Who will win? The poetry nerd or the theatre kid?

6) (Read downwards until the next row the layouts weird cos I sketched it whilst sleep deprived at 2am ;) ). Jonmartin fluff!

TMA is a tragedy. Listening to the Mechanism albums has made that very clear. So the next couple of images would be set in a happy ending AU fuck u they’re going to get married let me dream.

7) (Apologies for the weird writing again sleep deprived). Jon wants to fulfill his side of the bargain and take Martin to the theatre. After many trips to Georgie’s and a lot of planning, Jon decides to take them on a date to see Cats at the West End, since it turns out Martin knows the original poems. Thing is, this is their first proper date. And it so happens to conicide with their first anniversary. And Jon wants to spoil Martin with an engagement present as an apology (Jon ruined the proposal with his eye powers). Jon wants to go big. And it just so happens that Elias left a lot of money. He decides to go ham and get them a private box. He gets Georgie to book it for them since he wants it to be a surprise and despite his Eldritch mind google he can’t figure out how to work a laptop.

Martin is told he’s going to the theatre. However it takes until they’re collecting the tickets at the front desk for Jon to reveal the seats and thus allude to the expenses. Martin has always worried about money given his upbringing, and panics, nearly having a full blown argument with Jon in front of the ticket man. Jon really should have listened to Georgie’s warnings.

8) (The Wikipedia text box thing was inspired by a brilliant TMA comic, once I find it again I’ll link it!) Jon is very much excited for the perfomance, and infodumps about it. Martin is still annoyed about the expense of the date but starts to relax and mellow out once he gets a glass of wine in his hand and a quiet moment to listen to his fiancée talk passionately about something.

9) The gays get ice cream and discuss who’s the prettiest actor in the interval. Martin is very much wired to how Jon works now, and uses the conversation to calm him down a bit (I think Jon was very much concerned that Martin might leave him over this bless that man).

10) The couple head home after a few quiet drinks at the bar. Jon is exchausted - mentally strained by the worry of perfecting the date, his emotional investment into the show and the two glasses of wine he had. Martin forgives him for the excessive nature of the trip, but would be lying is he said he didn’t enioy the show (even if it was mainly experiencing it through Jon’s expressive face, investment and him mouthing the lyrics quietly to himself). He’s going to ask if they can maybe listen to a different musical album whilst Jon recovers from his inevitable hangover tomorrow, but first he needs to gently carry his pissed and sleepy partner up to bed.

I wanted to draw soft things I’m sorry I love this podcast with all my heart have a nice day

[frostbitepandaaaaa]

thumbprint scar, ch 14

well... here it is. 

just a PSA for all you poor, poor souls who have had to put up with my bullshit: the story is written and finished. i just need to polish and send to beta. i hope to have the rest of the chapters up by next week.

thank you to basically everyone, but most of all to @justwandering-neverlost​ for the amazing mood board and to @hardlyfatal​ for the much needed beta read. 

PREVIEW

She remembered the day her mother died.

She was seventeen, at the time. Three weeks earlier, her mother had taken her to tour the campus of NYU. After they’d finished oo’ing and ahh’ing over the verdant quad and the “quaint” dormitories, they went out for pastrami sandwiches, wiping grease from their fingers with paper napkins while framed, grayscale photos of immigrant families looked on from the dirty subway tile walls. They’d stared in wonder at the shifting shadows and macabre masks within a smoke-filled kabuki theatre. Dany had left New York with all the glee and hope of any prospective college kid: graceful and unencumbered, her whole life ahead of her.

And three weeks later, her mother had been gone.

It was strange, watching someone die. It was to be privy to an intensely private moment, something not meant for anyone else. It made one too vulnerable to be witnessed without a resultant sting of shame. As if death were not natural. As if they needed to remain strong, even as their life was slipping away.

When animals felt that death was imminent, they limped off into a thicket to curl up and fade away in solitude.

And yet, she could not abide the thought of leaving her mother’s side, to abandon her to diminish alone, thin and pale under the strange hospital lights.

The actual cause of the end of her mother’s life had come violent and sudden— a car crash, someone asleep at the wheel. But her death had crept in slow and unsure and that had enraged Dany. Still did. If death had to come to collect her mother, then let it fucking snatch her up, emphatic and clean.

“When we know more, we will tell you right away, Mrs. Snow.”

Dany blinked slowly at the nurse who stood in front of her. She was half turned away already, eager for Dany to give her the go-ahead to continue with her business, to proceed down the long line of people in the waiting room to deliver the same platitudes.

She remembered the day her mother died and it did not scare her.

Jon had cheated death once already. He was well practiced at it. He could do it again.

read it on ao3!

[thewordsinthevoid]

Live thoughts on tma 163:

-im wondering how they will change the stateformat now if they will will

-ooh walking yeah finally do something go on a trip with your so!

-martin are you human still

-oh so no one can like, sleep or dream anymore, whats happened to jons dreams?

-martin just wants a boat let him have a boat

-give martin a boat jon

-martin deserves a boat to ram peter lukass with

-oh god the panopticon! Holy shit! Fucking cool!

-your being ominous again jon, stop being a theatre kid

-the amount of stuff jon knows is terrifying

-YEAH IM SCARED TOO MARTIN

-THEYRE GONNA DIE

-IS THIS THE SLAUGHTER

-MARTIN JON ARE YOU OKAY

-oh god whos with them

-"dont be a prick jon" ajsjdkakdndj

-im scared of the trenches

-STATIC

-does he do statements on command now, statements all the time

-yeah martin stand up for yourself!

-glad theyre compromising

-i kinda like this new format im glad its somewhat similar

-"mahtin i hate your tea" BITCH

-oooh monologue

-war fucking sucks kids

-i like these new forms of the fears we're seeing

-i like the symbolism

-i dont know whats going on but god the vibe

-god this season is great

-is charlie an avatar?

-everything is dying~

-oh god is charlie dead!

-nooooooooooo

-oh good he lives

-just to suffer

-the drone?

-there are drones?

-oh god drone warfare

-god this ep is terrifying i love it

-can anyone die in the trenches?

-is this whats happening right now?

-oh god tanks

-god the imagery of being fed to the tank is fucking terrifying

-jon just goes off on a monologue in the middle of a war

-i love the background sound effects sets it apart

-i dont know whats going on but thats okay!

-the surgeon the surgeon the surgeon the surgeon scares me

-kinda like the way that the pov keeps on changing

-this is a great opening to the road trip apocalypse

-are there monsters on the other side? I dont think there is, but like, idk whats going on

-someone explain this episode to me later please

-HEY JONNY WHO GAVE YOU THE PERMISSION TO MAKE SO MUCH SCARY IMAGERY

-is-is that an avatar? Is it the capitalism avatar? Hi uncle sam

-im going to assume the guy whos like "oh look what a hero" is the uncle sam capitalism avatar

-charlie your back!

-jon u ok?

-omg the tone shift

-"yeah yeah"

-hey dont be mean martin we just wanna know what happens

-jonny reveal to me the tape recorders secret please

-IS THAT A FUCKING PHONE

-"thats here for some reason"

-DONT ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE MARTIN

-RUN MARTIN

-WHERED JON GO

-MARTIN

-oh god oh god oh god oh god

-whats the phone

-martin are you gonna be ok

-martin?

-WHATS THE FUCKING PHONE

[wherethesunsails]

ok now im rlly curious what are all ur spotify playlists?

....... I have So Many Spotify playlists and I just updated them all with covers too so the covers of my spotify playlists all have a similar vibe! ok so alphabetically

........... - just a bunch of kind of shouty angry sort of songs good for angsting

3.17.19 - this is a date playlist, the only one of its kind, I hung out with an old friend a while ago and this playlist is just a bunch of songs we listened to that night it was a good time :)

<3 autumn mixtape - this is that autumn mixtape i made for you forever ago great fall vibes

a six song study playlist - what’s on the tin i have a million study playlists

ajr - it’s just. all ajr songs

bonfire vibes - these are just all songs that give me bonfire vibes yanno

bops - this started out as just harry styles ajr and jon bellion but it’s got more variety in it now it’s got a lot of bangers

chill bops ‘19 - a bunch of just hanging out music from like the end of 2018/beginning of 2019

chill bops ‘20 - same as before just with a more refined music taste

chill driving ‘19 - it is not fun to describe these playlists because i designed the titles to be self explanatory

christmas - there’s a lot of michael buble in here

classic bonfire tunes - bonfire vibes but with a vintage vibe

classics - ummm it’s like sixties and seventies stuff?

coffee shop ‘19 - like if you were sitting in a coffee shop this would be playing

coffee shop ‘18 - same as before but more dedicated to the vibes less dedicated to the music taste

colton - so. this one is self explanatory (if it’s a name playlist it’s songs that remind me of people)

concerning hobbits - lord of the rings vibes

consider this... - i made this playlist to make tinder boys think i was interested in love

cross-country roadtrip - these are all songs by netherfriends that are named after cities and states

crushes - a specific song that reminds me of a specific crush (feat. you, clark, my ex, .... base unit josh?, uhhhh ethan?, emma, hannah, and colton)(lmao why isn’t david in there oh he might be the ymca not josh. unsure)

disney - again... what it says on the tin. I miss that ao3 tag where did it go

driving masterlist - if a playlist has driving or roadtrip in the title its songs go here

driving with dad - my dad has a weird ass taste in music idk what to say here

elliot - uh so this one is songs that remind me of you lmao

falling in love - just like. falling in love vibes yanno

falseheteros+ - this is the highlights of falsettos, legally blonde, beetlejuice, and book of mormon

feeling some sort of way - uh like. yearning vibes?

get back into pop punk - this was previously titled ‘why are you getting back into pop punk you freak’ and i think that was really funny but i made it public so

ghost songs - this is just like. the ghost duet and the ghost choir

girl in red - it’s girl in red songs.

halloween - spoopy vibes

hannah - again. name playlist

highlights of my music taste - this was also created to impress people from tinder i havent utilized either of them yet

hozier - . it’s hozier songs.

hype - this is a new playlist it’s kind of rap and various tiktok songs all of ppcocaine’s songs are on here

jon bellion - love this man’s music

jon bellion, rex orange county+ - rex orange county and jon bellion both have respectable bangers so. yanno

keiynan lonsdale - i love this guy incredible music

kendall - it’s. kendall songs.

kentucky soundtrack - this is my christian music masterlist for when i go on a missions trip

khalid - he has bangers what can i say

leon bridges - this guy’s vibes are immaculate

lily james - yeah so i’m incredible gay for this woman

lofi - there’s not a lot here but these are bangers

love story soundtrack - i think i made this to get me in the mood for writing/reading romance

mamma mia - i love this musical so much i have no explanation you don’t need one

mandy patinkin highlights - this is just the songs i like from evita

meme songs - i’m pretty sure if you listen to this playlist you’ll be rickrolled

mr pence’s summer camp - lmao these are queer songs/artists

mutuals roadtrip - oh yeah i made this collaborative i’ll link it so y’all can like. add to it

new stuff - songs i’ve discovered and i’m trying to learn

panic! at the disco - just bangers from mr brendan urie

paper due soon - uh so this is a playlist based on the theory that if you’re writing a last minute paper and you put on boss music from a video game you’ll write faster so this is undertale boss music lmaO

post-basketball aux - parent approved tunes for long drives home

preshow hype - :’-/ this playlist isn’t gonnna get used anymore probably because it was music to get us hyped before plays and i’m not in those at school anymore rip

queen - i love freddie mercury end of discussion

rat pack vibes - this is like. sinatra and bing crosby and the like

rex orange county bops - i love that guy he makes good music

ritters after close - this is all. terrible music. very naughty. meant to be played when there aren’t customers to offend

roadtrip ‘20 - the goal is to feel like you’re looking moodily out the car window in a coming of age movie

roadtrip soundtrack ‘18 - same hat

S- sexy - uh this just has drunk in love by beyonce on it because i think it’s a sexy song

sam - this one goes out to my friend who i kind of had a crush on and then he started dating one of my best friends from school and then i wasn’t allowed to be friends with him anymore and she hates me :)

savanna - i miss sav she was a blast. it’s a lot of mlp

seventies - decade playlist

she dates boys - uh. it’s a sdb vibes playlist

sixites - decade playlist

soft boy epidemic - if i remember right this is just ben platt

soul - wh- what it says on the tin

studying - self explanatory

summer ‘18 - summer vibes

summer of ‘19 - this one is songs that make me think of last summer i miss last summer so fucking much

summer roadtrip ‘18 - uh this is just all of the summer ‘18 and roadtrip ‘18 playlists combined

theatre - musical songs, a lot of abba on here, the entire soundtrack of hamilton

theatre 2.0 - more songs to belt on here than the last one

theatre kids during quarantine be like - i’m sick of this playlist now but it slapped at the beginning of quarantine

throwback - this is like. ‘00s-’10s bangers

tiktok bops - only the elite songs lmao

to nobody - uh this is another playlist i made for you lmao

upbeat driving ‘19 - bangers

veggietales - i needed a veggietales playlist, very useful for church functions and for being seen as a child

weird mix but okay - uh yeah this is like jon bellion and classic rock lmao

wuhluhwuh - i didn’t wanna put wlw in case some family found this playlist and knew what it meant lmao

yearning - just gay shit dude. that’s it

made you a mixtape (it has heart emojis around it) - yeah this is a playlist i made for you too

and there you have it that’s all of them! if you wanna listen to the playlists or even just check out the sick cover images i used my spotify is here!

[fandomexplosion]

Dc comics high school Au

Younger characters are students and older ones are parents/Teachers

Okay so I don’t have it completely writing out yet, these are just points Part 1/? Don't know if I'm going write anymore or even write a story for this.

Teachers/Parents

Diana Prince- history Teacher (mostly Greek history) and girls track coach.

Bruce Wayne- Parent. Practically the head of the pta. I mean he has enough kids.

Clark kent- both, parent and the fucking principle (Reason #1 Why Conner wants to hang himself.)

Lex Luthor- vice principal-

Oliver Queen- both, business teacher and Roy’s foster father. Will either come in on Monday morning hungover or just not show up. Mostly plays movies.

Barry Allen- teacher- chemistry teacher and boys track coach. (He’s also Wally’s uncle)

Hal Jordan- gym teacher

Dinah Lance- choir teacher.

Ray Palmer- physics teacher-

Ted Kord- math teacher. Doesn’t really want to but someone has to.

Rita Farr- drama/theatre teacher

Cliff Steel- auto and mechanics teacher.

Joe Kerr (Joker)- the drama director

John Jones- English teacher

Kyle Rayner- Art teacher- has never taught before. (It’s his first year) makes friends with students

Selina Kyle- Gymnastics teacher/Coach

Arthur Curry- swim teacher and coach.

Alec Holland- biology teacher-

Pamela Isley- earth science teacher

Harleen Quinzel- ladies softball coach, school psychologist/Counselor

Lazlo Valentin (Professor Pyg)- school nurse/doctor

Teth-Adam (black Adam) - ap/world history.

Edward Nygma- English teacher.- “Now can someone who isn’t completely incompetent answer this.” “Bart Put your hand down, you’re an idiot”

Eobard Thawne- US history teacher

Vandal Savage- superintendent.-

Every once in a while a sub will come in (Mr. Shazam? Mr. Marvel?) oddly enough He’s never subed for Billy’s class or he’s absent in said class.

Music Meister- band

Vril Dox- algebra and geometry teacher

Students

Dick Grayson- on the gymnastics team. The most popular boy in a cheesy movie about high school romance

Roy Harper- looks like a drug addict, probably is a drug addict. Voted most likely to shoot up a school. Jason Todd is his partner in crime.

Jason Todd- voted most likely to blow up the school. Has the hot bad boy routine DOWN. Wake me up WAKE ME UP INSIDE I can’t wake up.

Tim Drake- is literally a walking mess. Always has coffee. Will probably find him hunched over computer watching buzzfeed unsolved.

Kara Danvers- is a cheerleader. Tries. She really tries but she’s a hot mess. (But to be honest most in this school are) in the journalist club. (Clark and Conner’s cousin)

Wally West- track star. Will take food from anyone. Is actually a nerd.

Conner Kent- it’s almost like these hot blue eyed black hair boys are being cloned. Will flirt with anyone and everyone. Has a great style. Will tell you if what you’re wearing is bad. Is dork though.

Bart Allen- is everyone’s little brother. The cute one. Also weird. And get this boy a haircut. (Not really it’s cute) like his cousin Wally he will eat everything however his is more absurd. Like fries off the ground or random sludge he was dared to drink. Somehow related to Barry (know one knows how though)

Kory Anders- head cheerleader. Is nice but intimidating. Looks like a Brazilian super model. Also plays volleyball.

Cassie Sandsmark- also cheerleader🤷‍♀️. Akward and weird.

Cassandra Cain- quiet, cute and can kick your ass. If you mess with her and she somehow doesn’t fuck you up, you bet her four brothers will. Is a dancer. Knows asl

Garfield Logan- basketball player. Funny dorky kid. In drama class/theatre.

Rachel Roth- goth girl. Meditates. Might be possessed but is easily calmed with tea.

Damian Wayne- isn’t actually in high school but has ap classes. Will get picked up by his older siblings and will end up hanging with who said sibling is hanging with. Will usually get picked up by Dick or Jason will force Tim to pick Damian up for him.

Barbara Gordon- computer wiz. *Hacker voice* I’m in. I’m a boss ass bitch plays in the background.

Billy Batson- is that one freshman that doesn’t annoy everyone. Is kinda an outsider. Makes friends with everyone though, even the teachers. Is actually really smart and somehow knows everything. Is the one who would find ‘Secret’ passages and sneaks around a lot.

Stephanie Brown- WAFFLES! Wears a lot of purple.

Donna Troy- yearbook photographer. Is mom friend to everyone. Tells you when you’re being stupid.

Duke Thomas- doesn’t want to be here. ”All those idiots over there? Yah I don't know them.” He says like a liar.

Jon Kent- not in high school but is Conner’s little brother and Damian’s best friend.

Querl Dox- Big nerd. Everyone goes to him when the Don’t get their Math homework. Resting judging you face.

Couples

Hal and Barry- the cute teacher couple

Dick and Kory- prom king and queen. Will probably get married once they graduate. On and off a lot though.

Conner and Bart- (Okay listen, they need more love)- somehow works. If you touch Conner’s baby you will probably get thrown through a wall.

Garfield and Rachel- That’s my wife! She’s a bitch and I love her. He may be an idiot but he’s my idiot.

Harleen and Pamela- the lesbian teachers who might adopt you.

Tim Drake and Stephanie Brown- is honestly perfect for each other.

Kara Danvers and Querl Dox- most don't realize they're dating.

if you want to give ideas for it you can.