#(it is a further elaboration of the intro but who knows)

[legionofpotatoes]

*veilguard spoilers*

solas dragonage's life is nothing but a series of unwanted friends moving into his various homes unprompted. can't pin a single pad down without deadbeat freeloaders stinking it up immediately. he keeps fixating on corrupt elvhenan but his real curse is being Too Popular

[valle-de-sombra-de-muerte]

Homestuck Reread: Act 5-1, Part 1/5 (p. 1989-2099)

Read the previous post here.

Well the last post got a much more positive reception than I expected, so that's a relief. Anyway, get the grey face paint ready, because it's time for Act 5-1.

Alternian script is the Daedric alphabet from The Elder Scrolls series flipped upside down, which I'm sure most fans know already. The user tries entering "Turdodor Fuckball" for the planet's name.

Interestingly, the correct name is not "Alternia" but "Trollplanet." Is that what Alternia translates to into English? There's like zero discussion at all about troll language because Hussie did not give a single shit about developing this alien society beyond "grey violent humans with horns."

Right out the gate, Karkat's intro leads with his key character trait: his crippling self-loathing. Everything about him, from how he excessively plays up his competence and knowledge to his naturally angry and defensive disposition, stems from the fact that he views himself as a defective freak that constantly needs to prove himself.

His interests are similar to John's. He likes bad movies, specifically romcoms, which ties into his greater passion for romance and the study of interpersonal relationships as a whole. He also has an inexplicable interest in programming. It's at least implied that Karkat only attempts to learn so he can try to compete with Sollux in a futile rivalry. The reason why John likes to program is anyone's guess.

His greatest dream is to join the Alternian military, which is probably the only viable career path for someone of his pariah status. He's constantly in danger of being culled, so he wants to prove to the Empire that he's more valuable to them alive rather than dead. In order to preserve his life, he's willing to serve them and become a tool they can use to further their intergalactic conquests.

"Trolls think fashion is stupid." A simple phrase that is regularly ignored by people who create fantrolls with garish and elaborate outfits.

A good programmer would have no trouble with this modus, so Karkat forces himself to use it until he gets good. Even though it's frustrating and causes him misery, he's so stubborn to prove himself as a good programmer that it reaches the point where Sollux has to take it away from him. Probably because it has become too much of a hindrance. IDK, we never see much of the trolls' session to find out, which is a fucking shame.

Karkat's stubbornness is also a key part of his character. See also: his trolling scheme of trolling John backwards through time is something he admits is stupid, but he continues to go through with it. He will admit he's wrong, often begrudgingly and self-deprecatingly, but will double down and refuse to change course despite that. Giving up is synonymous with failure, something he is deathly afraid of.

If Karkat is so afraid of letting his blood color become known, why does he have candy-red awnings outside his hive? He might as well have a big sign alerting everyone that a mutant lives there.

Everything about Karkat has to be big, flashy, and important. His huge ambitions compensate for his self-loathing so that others don't view him as the worthless mutant he sees himself as. He has to prove that he is a good programmer, he is a strong leader, and he will be the best threshecutioner in the whole military!

This pretty much summarizes what Karkat wants in life: to overcome caste discrimination and gain prestige and respect.

It's tempting to call Will Smith Karkat's "patron black celebrity" but I won't because 1) that whole thing doesn't carry over to the trolls, and 2) this is actually relevant to Karkat's character and not some bizarre, nonsense """joke""" like with the kids.

I've always been a big fan of "angry/uptight guy" and "goofy dumb guy" dynamics, and Karkat and Gamzee fit that to a T. Even though Karkat is extremely rude to Gamzee, he doesn't ever dispute the notion that they are in fact friends. Their friendship is being treated as an established fact, something Karkat uses an excuse to further whinge about how much his life sucks.

Gamzee drops his typing quirk momentarily. This doesn't happen often in the comic, but it's something trolls only ever do when they're close to someone, if they want to express something serious, or both.

Even before the introduction of quadrants, we see hints of a pale dynamic between them. Gamzee is the perfect sounding board for Karkat's vents, doesn't object to the verbal abuse being slung his way, and is implied much later on to be a somewhat of a calming source for Karkat. Yes of course I ship them pale. I just think they're neat, okay? <> :)

Gamzee very inelegantly changes the subject after mentioning Sollux and Karkat's friendship. Karkat may be Gamzee's best friend, but Sollux is Karkat's best friend. That must be a sore spot for him. But beyond this, we never ever see what Sollux and Gamzee's relationship might be like. It would've been nice if Gamzee was more jealous and protective of his best friend/moirail and not like it when Karkat shows more favor to anyone else.

Gamzee and Karkat's dynamic is something that I believe Hussie wanted to set up throughout the Act so that their eventual confrontation would have a bigger payoff, but he fumbled massively with the execution. Either because he doesn't really give a shit about Gamzee, or through sheer inept writing, I can't say. But it sucks because there's definitely a lot of potential here.

They're the first trolls to interact in this new Act, but they don't really ever talk much after this point. They're only ever seen together sporadically and it's implied a handful of times that they're closer than Karkat is willing to let on, but there's never anything beyond that. They really needed to speak more so their relationship could be fleshed out. I'll talk more about this as I move along because this lives in my brain rent-free.

It's really dumb how Gamzee's "rather obscure cult" ended up turning into a religion that pretty much every purple blood follows, but I'm not going to talk about post-canon garbage. I get a headache just thinking about it.

I do like the Joker Card posters in his room. I had that Riddle Box one in my own room for a time.

He likes to "chat a lot" with Karkat. So I guess they just talk to each other way more than what's shown in the text. Thanks, Hussie.

Gamzee never received a proper upbringing from his guardian and had to essentially raise himself. In the process of this, he became addicted to mind-altering substances. To everyone who says Bro is the worst guardian in the story, I gladly point you all to Goat Dad.

Terezi is being intentionally annoying. I know most of the trolls are assholes, but why do any of them waste their time with Terezi when she makes it a point to be obnoxious? It's even more baffling when people try to paint her as one of the more "well-adjusted" trolls.

Karkat fantasizes about making doomsday viruses, huh? I'm going to keep a pin in this for l8r I mean later...

It's funny how Karkat both admires and envies Sollux. Their relationship is also one that doesn't get a lot of attention, despite ostensibly being the "John" and "Dave" parallels of the troll cast. Oh wait, I guess John and Dave's friendship ended up being really shallow and one-sided too. So this tracks, actually.

Sollux disparages Gamzee's religion and expresses disgust when he suspects Karkat might be a convert. So again, I think there's definitely some conflict between these two. Two of the trolls that Karkat is closest to don't seem to like each other. It makes me kind of wish we got some auspistice action between the three of them.

Even though Karkat is regularly rude to his friends, he still values their company deep down. He might be one of the most personable trolls despite his grouchy attitude. He not only tolerates the obnoxious people in his contacts, he actually considers them his close friends. Gamzee is a total dullard and Sollux is crass and moody, but they're also the ones he's closest to. Out of the main cast of trolls, there's only one whom Karkat actively dislikes and makes no real attempt at being sociable with. I'll talk about that when I reach that part.

"Orchestrating the demise of the wicked" yeah I'm sure John was guilty of being very wicked and dastardly when she sent him to his death.

Terezi has a passion for justice, but keep in mind that "justice" on Alternia is equivalent to sentencing people to death for the pettiest of reasons. So no, she is not at all some moral, upstanding heroine. She's a psychotic gremlin who enjoys killing people if they violate her draconian interpretation of the law. She does not care for defending victims of injustice, she enforces the will of the state.

Part of Terezi's core conceit is that she's this half-assed Daredevil parody. She's 1) blind and has super senses 2) uses a cane to fight, and 3) is a "lawyer." Aside from that, she shares nothing else in common with Daredevil. I imagine Hussie does not know anything about superheroes beyond superficial, pop culture knowledge.

I remember when people loved to portray Nepeta and Terezi as good friends, but Terezi doesn't actually like role playing with her. She treats her like a joke, much like everyone else. Poor Nepeta gets such a raw deal.

In Nepeta's very first speaking appearance, we get a glimpse of her horrible relationship with Equius. Despite the physical distance between them, she's so browbeaten into subservience that she feels the need to ask him for "purrmission" before doing anything. She is scared about expressing her honest desires around him, preferring to skirt around the issue and just blindly hoping that things will work out and he won't get mad at her. It feels like someone trying to wear kid gloves around an abusive partner or parent. Despite Terezi's concerns, Nepeta tries to downplay the issue and pretend everything's fine.

This conversation is honestly sad to read. "But nooo they are bestest friends!" I hear the fans cry as they flock around the flanderized, fluffy art of Nepeta and Equius. Is that why she straight up admits that she's scared of him? Fuck Meowrails. I hate that shit so much. I'm going to spit so much acid every time it rears its ugly head.

We have to constantly be reminded of Terezi's blindness since it really doesn't impact her character in a meaningful way. Sure she can't see, but she can navigate the world around her so adeptly with her super senses that it's a non-issue. Nobody would even notice that she's blind if she wasn't always pointing it out.

Eridan is mentioned as being part of this inner circle that's in the know about Sgrub. Huh.

I'm old enough to remember when Eridan had yet to be revealed and the only information about him was this page. Some people thought he'd be some kind of environmental activist. It's funny to think about now, but I really miss the days when fans would theorize about future updates and unseen characters. All that guesswork and theorycrafting led to some really fun discussions and fanworks. The boundless creativity shown by the fans was what made the Homestuck fandom something really special in those days. And it's something we lost once the comic was finished and Hussie's completed product didn't measure up to the fans' expectations.

I really really miss 2010-11, you guys...

I really have to question the logistics of this convoluted reproduction cycle. If the adult trolls are off-world, how long does it take the drones to transport the genetic material back to Alternia? Are they just zipping all across the galaxy to do constant jizz runs?

None of this really matters because as previously established, the main trolls were not born in this manner. They're all slime constructs born from an entirely separate incestuous slurry from natural trolls. I think Hussie just has an obsession with creatures being birthed from goo or something.

One of the biggest problems with Act 5-1 is this rushed tone it has. It's weird to say because I remember how often people complained about how long the Act was taking to wrap up, but it's true! Hussie really wants to zip through these character introductions without elaborating on any of the worldbuilding he touches upon along the way. It's what makes troll society as a whole feel so shallow and not well thought out.

These characters really needed their own story divorced from that of the kids and Sburb. A story where the Alternia setting could be allowed to breathe and be explored more thoroughly and thoughtfully. I think that would've made for a more entertaining read.

Sollux gets this fake-out intro that's basically a retread of Dave's. Aside from being kind of standoffish and tech-savvy, this parallel doesn't go anywhere. There's little else that connects Sollux with Dave because Sollux is hardly a main character. He is the tech guy who has mood swings, doesn't like to be involved with shenanigans, and has visions of doom that make him depressed. He's a glorified background character.

Okay, "beenary code" is kind of a lame pun, but I do think "silicomb" is clever.

Kanaya lives near the ruins of Alternia's frog temple. Both she and Aradia are kind of the "Jade" of the trolls' session. Aradia by means of doing background plot stuff, and Kanaya through... I suppose theming? Both she and Jade are isolated, considered "outliers" in their culture/friend group, receive regular visions from Skaia, and are the teams' Space players.

It's worth noting how both the "Jade" trolls wind up being the most stoic, unflappable characters of the cast and mostly serve the purpose of being exposition-dumpers and plot devices. Kinda like Jade herself, except instead of being deadpan she's quirky and all over the place.

I feel like this post could've been a lot longer, but I'm limiting myself to only five posts for this Act. I don't want to stretch this project out too long, lest I be yapping about the trolls until the end of time.

Read the next post here.

[infernaltenor]

one more niki analysis.

for now.

ok this one technically i've had in mind for MONTHS but couldn't figure out how to word it until just now because i a) read hot limit about three months ago and it hasn't left my head since b) the idol exploration event.

anyway. the actual crux of this is: niki's character is specifically written to be content, not happy. these often get confused imo. the second part of this is his contentedness isn't natural, it's forced. the third part of this is no one fucking notices, except for one rinne amagi, because of course he does. by no one, i'm talking specifically character-wise here; niki in game tends to get written off as childish or otherwise doing well, and that comes directly from his other unit members.

side note: i'm fairly confident in my own reading of "niki will pretend to not be bothered by anything, ever" and this is bolstered by a few different things; a) the honeycomb summer lyrics in my last post where there's a part of the intro, "hidden the true feelings out of habit / and now you're regretting it" (rinne amagi you slick bastard) b) hot limit. like the entire story. mostly because he was being troubled by multiple different things throughout it (work, idol activities, and his family last name/father's scandal) and the only person who noticed was rinne, and that's probably because he knew the damn guy for five years c) also in hot limit, the exploration into niki seeing himself as a burden because of his illness. why did they add this into his character and then not elaborate further? i don't know. if it never gets elaboration, i'll implode. anyway, it's a part of his character that he usually doesn't show, but he references it as "not wanting to inconvenience the people around him" REGARDLESS of if the people in question don't mind him inconveniencing them (rinne). in general, the only thing he makes a fuss about is food, likely because of his metabolism and the fact that he does become more of a danger to people when extremely hungry (he has bitten hiiro before.); i.e. the inconvenience for everyone else is a 19-20yro trying to bite them, not complaining that he's hungry.

i digress.

niki has referenced himself as being content with certain things before. for instance, in hot limit, it's phrased distinctly as "just getting to eat every day is a bliss to me - i need to be satisfied with that", which comes up again in his letter from the idol exploration:

"it feels like happiness is there to fill my stomach, too!" oh, is it? is it niki? is it now?

basically, what i'm getting at is niki's expectations for life are so incredibly low, so he's satisfied with getting to eat every day. that's it. just satisfied. side note: this is why i went insane when survival was added to his profile; the way he lives/talks about living, he's been surviving more than living. this is also why i think rinne and niki work so well as a pair, rinne's into living and niki's busy surviving. though, to be fair, rinne and niki's relationship is built on this crux anyway. rinne intends (hopes, maybe? his goal?) is to help niki with what he has identified as a problem. thank you rinne amagi.

(for the record, right after i read this, my live reaction was "WHAT IF I KILLED MYSELF". that's quite dramatic, and i won't, but i figured someone might get a laugh out of that.)

this isn't the first time that rinne has referred to niki (well, more so implied) as "not happy", as it happens in hot limit, too.

"that's why i'll grant his wish and make him happy" oh ok i see.

anyway. niki's fascinating, because this forced contentedness vs happiness is so interesting to me, because beyond rinne's own read of niki, it's easily bought by everyone else he knows. most notably, kohaku and himeru, as their impressions come off of reading niki quite differently to rinne's:

(i grabbed these screenshots after i finished the event for the time being. rinne's i grabbed before LMAO)

both of them appreciate and even look up to niki in certain ways, and they both like his focus on food. but what's interesting is how both of them see him vastly different from rinne; where rinne focuses on his low self impression, himeru thinks niki's perspective of the world is interesting, as well as i think he gives credence to niki being selfless, which kohaku sees him as both childish and reckless. i'm pretty sure both himeru and kohaku see him as more naive than themselves, which is a fair read. this also does line up with what happens in hot limit; while rinne is aware of the troubles niki's going through, himeru and kohaku are both surprised at the end.

niki's own effort, i think, to convince himself of being satisfied and content pays off, because the only person who notices otherwise is rinne. which, imo, is a whole other source of depth to their relationship; rinne probably saw niki working that out. he was 14 when they met, and likely the shiina parents leaving was recent (side note: i'm a certified niki's parents hater. i know we don't have much info on them, but i don't trust them after that burden thing), which is something i've mostly extrapolated by the contact he seems to have at 14 vs at 19, where they're pretty much never mentioned. yes, i know, niki chose to stay in japan. i just don't think you get through your parents leaving you in your native country at 14 while they gallivant around the globe and your communication with them steadily dwindles results in anything good.

ok. i'm sorry for the parent hating.

but unless proven otherwise i'm expecting them to be the source of these problems.

[sunkissedliterarylightofchrist]

Favorite TØP album?

Actually I've been trying to decide if it's Vessel or Blurryface. I am having a Very Hard Time picking. Here's two experts from a SUPPPPPPER long post I wrote about every single TØP song ever.

Vessel

This album [Vessel] dives into even tougher themes this time around and I am here for it. Mental health, purpose, meaning of life, faith, doubt, all with a lot of emotional intensity and shaking-you-by-the-shoulders urgency here, and it really does cement their signature stuff.

I LOVE this album musically SO MUCH. UGH its just GREAT. I love the rocking rhythms, the beat switches and changes and drops, and its really where they developed their style of ukulele-rap-pop-punk-screamo

Ode to Sleep We get started with a bang. This is where I think he really unlocks his awesome rapping and then beats his mental health using it, and fights the demons and it ends in hope. 10/10 no further notes needed

Holding On To You Also a Top 10 song for sure. I could jabber about this song for an entire post. I adore the piano and drums in this and his rapping is so on point and perfect. The music video is wonderful as well. But the lyrics are what makes it so epic. Him taking his body back and shoving his flesh out the door??? Through writing and thinking he wants to give his soul to Jesus??? And that God is always around him and Tyler is holding on to Him??? And then we have the verse to end all verses where he goes DON'T KILL YOURSELF OKAY! and shows that you've gotta control your emotions and not let your emotions control you??? And then how he just repeats over and over and over how he needs God to continue to entertain his faith so that he can hold onto Him??? I'm literally speechless guys, 100000/10 its AMAZING that he's not gonna be a slave to his own mind anymore.

Migraine I love how the intro asks the question that I have found that 99% of teenagers think- 'Am I the only one I know who is struggling with this?' It's one of the biggest lies for the teenage age group that Satan throws at them. It sure worked on me. By thinking I was the only one who'd ever felt Like That, I thought that no one could ever possibly understand me, so I never bothered to talk about it and instead just silently wallowed in my misery and was really selfish about myself and my emotions. Also I just love that part where he screams 'I AM NOT AS FINE AS I SEEM!!!!' then quietly goes 'pardon' because its both funny and very true. And then he goes on to elaborate how terrible and dark his mind is, then says one of my favorite lines ever, 'Cause sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind' Which is so true and so well said. A lot of us really do need to learn how to tell our thoughts to simply Shut Up. And then the song ends on the best note ever. 'That life has a hopeful undertone.../We've made it this far kid' One of their best songs in my opinion

House of Gold It's a really cute and sweet song about his love for his mom and I like it. Don't have much to say on it, its just solid. (I do not get the mv at all though, it seems so out of place and morbid with the context to me)

Car Radio A complete and utterly iconic masterpiece. Top 10 club here. I love how the main themes are Peace Will Win and Fear Will Loose and While Music is a Great Tool for Fighting Darkness, You Need to Have Silence and Allow Yourself to Deal With Your Thoughts and Personally Fight Them Because Music Can Become a Mask that Allows You to Get Away with Bad Things. Which is really important and something I think the fandom needs to be reminded of, especially as we get to later albums like Trench which are all about how using music will defeat your demons. Sometimes too much of a Good Thing turns it into a Bad Thing.

Semi-Automatic One of my favorites. I love how he's just like 'Yeah, I am Messed Up. And my flesh likes being messed up, but my soul is revolted by it and I need Hope and Sun to shun my darkness out' It describes the human condition so well. And the instrumentals??? I love them so much! The opening is the best, with the synthy stuff with the beat drop and then Tyler's vocals sounding like a punch. I love how he teases tension along the whole time. And the do-do's make me very happy :D

Screen I like how this song goes 'I know you can see my flaws, and I'm okay with that, even though it scares me' and he encourages us to do the same. And the instrumentals are sweet.

The Run and Go I love how this song is about guilt, and how Tyler wants to hold his cards to his chest about who he is and what he's done, but admits that he needs help and for someone to be with him through the dark nights. The banging introduction is ~iconic~ to me and makes me want to lace up my shoes each time because its the first song in my running playlist and its a great song to run to. And once again, the do-do's make me very happy :D

Fake You Out I like how this song talks about hiding your struggles from everyone and putting on a mask to pretend that you are find and a better person than you really are. I think that it continues this theme of not being as good as you seem really well.

Guns for Hands This song is very direct about self harm and suicide. Acknowledging it, and the lies and hurt that come from it, and offering hope in it's place and suggesting a less violent course of action. And yes the upbeat ba-bum-bah's of the drum and piano are awesome.

Trees I like how he is reaching out to God, knowing that He is there, but not sure where, and longing for assurance and safety and comfort, and he continues to seek God even when it seems like He's gone, but Tyler knows that He's just testing his faithfulness.

Truce Tyler's going, "Stay alive. Have hope. I'm looking right in your eyes as I say this, holding your hand, you've gotta take things one by one. You are not alone. There is Hope and Light in the world. Look for it." Its the perfect ending to this album.

Blurryface

Here [Blurryface] is where everything clicks together so perfectly. The lyrics? Gut wrenching as ever, forcing you to wake up and take a look at the world and yourself, and with SO MANY allegorical references and the album (and most of the songs) start out dark but end in triumph as he defeats Blurryface. The themes? Captivating. This is probably their deepest and most thought-through album, talking about self-doubt, anxiety, inner conflict, insecurities, and self-focus, and about breaking the cycle by facing it head on. The background music? EPIC! 

This is where they really step it up and slam dunk their style and sounds. Every song on here is a banger. I love how the chaotic electronic songs perfectly support the chaotic feel of what Tyler is saying, and Josh's drumming here is elite. The music videos and imagery? AFADJFHADLFKAHSA don't even get me started. Every single one of these songs right here could be an entire post.

Heavydirtysoul Best song on the album hands down. In their Top 5 for sure. The rapping is utterly brilliant, trying to get the dark voices out of his head, then getting cut through his pleading singing of 'Can you save my Heavydirtysoul, from me?' Its SOOOOOOOO apparent how he's talking to God here, and it's incredible. "All the mindless zombies walking around with a limb and a hunch, saying stuff like, 'You only live once, one time to figure it out'"? I almost fell over the first time I heard it, it's genius. It's so true what people do and say and pressure other people to do and say when they aren't even really living themselves! 'Death inspires me a like a dog inspires a rabbit'? He's scared of dying you guys. He knows and understands morality and is scared shirtless (literally sometimes, have you seen those tour clips lol) that he won't make enough of his life, and NEEDS God to save his Heavydirtysoul. Iconic and perfect. And then the I n s t r u m e n t a l s??? Insanely incredible, anyone who says otherwise needs to get their hearing checked lol. The frantic beat and killer drums and gunshots that get the entire thing started? SO GOOD! Everything about it is epic, and the way that they were able to mesh all of those sounds together was quite the epic feat, I've listened to this song on loop for hours, trying to figure out how they made it sound so good and couldn't figure it out. This song is genius. And the music video was also awesome, because it has so much depth to it, but mainly because at the time, it was the kickstart of the DEMA storyline and nobody knew it yet! That was probably a pretty cool experience I imagine. 

Stressed Out I really enjoy this song for three reasons. 1) the music video. It absolutely reeks of nostalgia, and the imagery is perfect. 2) How the current insecurity is tainiting your good memories 3) How some of those 'good memories' aren't actually as good as you want to make yourself believe. I also go more in depth about this song here if you'd like. This song doesn't really resolve, but that's kinda the whole point with this one, it works.

Ride I love the emphasis on living > dying. Like we know that we'd be willing to make certain sacrifices for certain people, but it would be a whole lot better and even more meaningful if you live for them and sacrifice in other ways. And he's like, 'you gotta find purpose' but leaves the dot dot dot on what gives you purpose. It is also very catchy.

Fairly Local BAM Blurryface as a person > just a concept is introduced. And in an incredible way. I think that the way they split up Tyler's vs. Blurry's verses is intriguing. Cause Blurryface is remind Tyler, 'Look at yourself, look at me. We are the same, which makes you a worthless, terrible person because you allow me to exist, and it's all your fault.' But that kinda has the reverse effect of waking Tyler up, and him going from I'm evil to the core-> I'm not evil to the core, there are terrible parts to me, yes, but it isn't all that I am since I've placed my trust in something higher than temporary emotions, there is hope for me if I defeat you. Which is a great storytelling shift. Also it's the first introduction to the phrase 'The few, the proud, the emotional' which is such a cool and cold line that could be broken down ~lots~. And the darker instrumentals and vocals are epic.

Tear in My Heart Character limit for posts here you go

Lane Boy This song is okay, but not my fav. I think actually the best part of it isn't even in the audio of the song, it's in the music video where the screen says 'Why do I bow to these concepts? [Talking about Fame and Success] Tempted by control. Controlled by temptation. 'Stay low' they say' and then they dance before collapsing at a kneel to each other, with Tyler still standing. And I like that line 'Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless' Which I think reads into don't trust anything or anyone that acts like they are perfect. Which is very true and very good. HOWEVER. There is a line that gives me pause. When he says that he doesn't know where he'd be without music. Which I think is reallllllyyy something after he wrote Car Radio, where he said sometimes you HAVE to allow yourself to sit with your thoughts and grapple with them, because music can't be a constant distraction from them. But I do understand how much good has come from his music, and I love it, its just like... idk man, I can't put my finger on it.

The Judge I could write a LOT about this, but unlike Tear in my Heart, I will hold myself back this time lol. I LOVE how this song is just him talking to God, the Judge, pouring out his doubts and insecurities and begging for mercy, knowing that he doesn't deserve it because of how he's messed up and sinned in life. And itends with having to trust in God and His strength and knowing that he is saved and needs to take rest in that fact. I adore the instrumentals of this song as well, it contrasts so wonderfully.

Doubt "Even when I doubt you/I'm no good without You" Do I need to elaborate? And how he's just beging God to not forget about him and cast him aside over his mistakes (which God will NEVER do, but it is something that I think is a common Christian experience, we all have that worry at some point or another). Blurryface is kinda winning in this one, and Tyler is trying his best to look past him and to Jesus with every shaky syllable.

Polarize I love the song introduction so much, okay? His synthy voice is the best here. I love that line 'Want to be an adversary to the evil I have done' which the first time I heard it, thought it said 'Want to be an adversary to the Evil One' but you know whatever. They are both good things to say. And his voice breaking when he goes 'I don't know where you are/You'll have to come and find me, find me' It makes me SCREAM its SO GOOD. I love how he wants to polarize the two split parts of his (and the human) condition. I talk about this a lot in my pinned post, we were created to be good, but we chose evil, and we're haunted by the fallen nature of the world and by our own sin and darkness. And then when we put our faith in Jesus, we become holy once more, redeeming and restoring us. His song is exploring the duality of our hearts and human nature and being saved in a more ambiguous way than creature, but still well.

We Don't Believe What's on TV I like how this song talks about the scary side of chasing your dreams- that you could fail, or that it could stop being your dream. And then wondering what people will think of it. But then knowing that people who are worthwhile and love you will still be there, even then. The ukelele in this makes me very happy as well.

Message Man A Top 10 song hands down. The lyrics of this are FIRE and the beat to it is crazy awesome and incredible and I love it. I know that this song has a lot of richness that I still need to chew over to write a post worthy of it, but I love how Tyler is saying, "Look, I am being authentic as much as I can in my music, I've written multiple songs on it, but what you see doesn't even scratch the surface to all this darkness in here. I am messed up. There is a lot of darkness you haven't seen. 'Use discretion when you're messing with the message man/These lyrics aren't for everyone to understand'"

Hometown Nautrally, we live in the dark, where there's no sun (which I'm like 97% sure is their imagery for God). It's our hometown. And yet the shadows that live here are tilting their heads at me (which I think is saying that Blurryface is going like "uh-oh, he's winning this fight and I'm dying, what do I do?") I love how he's acknowledging his hometown (haunted by our flesh) but is going "I don't want to stay here"

Not Today I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH. He's exposed Blurryface now, exposed him, taken him out of his mind, and forced the light in, allowing himself to be seen as who he is without Blurryface controlling him. This is the song where he's really taking action and being like, "You have an eviction notice my evil dude, get out." And then he's also once again touching on something that the entire album is about, getting your insecurities on the outside. Which I think is such an excellent and important messege. With insecurities (and habitual sin, if you wanna go there, which I do), the best weapon you have to defeat it is to get it out of your head, so that you can see it more clearly, and then allow others who are close to you to help you in fighting it too. Which is the only way I've ever been able to defeat insecurity and habitual sin, is by exposing it and telling people I loved and trusted about it, so that they could encourage me and help me fight it, as well as hold me accountable for it and when it starts to win again, not to mention also be like Tear in My Heart ideas. I think some of his best singing in this song right here. And this song has quite a few funnier moments, especially with his contradictions and the phrase "This one's a contradiction/Because of how happy it sounds/But the lyrics are so down" which is the driving force of Scaled and Icy later on.

Goner "I wanna be known by you" he says that 2342 times and its so obviously a plea to God here. "The ghost of you is close to me"??? "I've got two faces/Blurry's the one I'm not/ I need your help to take him out"??? It's a very raw and pleading ending, thinking he's a goner but not ready to get up cause he's got an ace up his sleeve, Jesus. Yeah, he's got fears, but also ultimate hope. And he's going to choose to keep fighting Blurryface with God. A very contemplative ending, which is at odds with the sounds of the rest of the album, but in a way that makes a lot of sense I think. I like how he goes from just vulnerable with the lyrics to being just as vulnerable sounding with the piano. We haven't heard that kinda sound since Before You Start Your Day, and its a good ending to the fight.

Basically, Vessel runs through the Romans 7 cycle, in a really intriguing and incredible way. And basically, Blurryface is a personification of mental health struggles and sin and defeating them through God.

I can't pick which one I like more yet 🫠

[starmonsterrr]

✦ INTRO POST - STILL IN BUILDING

[ * IDENTITY ]

[ * I am also non-human, though I recognize that (to my dismay) I have the body of one. (No shade to physical nonhumans of any type though!!! You creatures are awesome!!!!) ]

[ * Who am I? Call me Io! Or Aurum... Or Eureka... Whichever works :P ]

[ * My pronouns are it/its and I identify as stargender! ]

[ * Further elaborating, I'm otherkin (dragon), therian (silver fox), and fictionkin (well... OCkin. And it's Io! info post link here). ]

[ * I also happen to be the host of what very likely seems to be a system, though luckily for me a small one ]

[ * The known members are me, Atramentum (an Ink!Sans fictive, y'all may know them from @inktroject) and K, which seems to be aggressive and rarely takes front ]

[ * I'm in front most of the time, with Atty (short for Atramentum) somewhat frequently sliding in as well, and when he's not in control they're usually co-conscious. ]

[ * WHAT I DO ]

[ * The main thing you'll see is drawings. Many drawings. I enjoy drawing a lot! I have been drawing ever since I have memory. I also occasionally compose music and write, but I have yet to post any of that in this blog... ]

[ * And I also animate! Because of the effort it takes, it is quite rare to see me posting animations. But I still do it! I have a YouTube channel dedicated to it, in fact. You can find some of my animations there. ]

[ * FANDOMS ]

[ * My primary fandom is the UTMV and has been for three years as of 29/07/2024! As such this blog is near entirely centered on it. I may occasionally reblog stuff from other fandoms, though I don't see UTMV getting overthrown as my current main interest anytime soon. ]

[ * MISCELLANEOUS ]

[ * I'm Ink's wife and girlfriend (in a non-binary way if that makes any sense) for all eternity (/srs), and I post about that fairly often I think ]

[ * I also enjoy being an astronomical level of cringe... And I refuse to apologize for it. In fact if you dare insult me for it, or for anything really, I will channel the hatred into more cringepower. Cringe culture is dead and I am mauling its corpse :3 (That is an AMAZING quote. Might put it as a blog title eventually) ]

[ * Tags I use (recalling from memory... May miss a few.) ]

#corv reblogs

#corv friend interactions

#corv gets an ask

#corv draws • (usually full drawings)

#corv doodles • (low-quality drawings usually made for silly reasons)

#corv rambles about lore

#corv's io • (posts about Io)

#corv's aurum • (posts about Aurum)

#the starry night (selfship) • (Ink x Io)

#corv doodle request • (doodle requests I draw)

#corv doodle request status • (status updates for when I open and close doodle requests)

#corv & corvpany • (silly plurality stuff)

[ * Stuff I'm working on ]

OuterRenaissance (Undertale AU, Outertale variant) (has an official blog! @outerrenaissance though I gotta actually get started using it.)

Some info on star-born monsters! I think.

[ * Links for things ]

[ * About Io (UTMV self-insert, sona number 1) ]

[ * About Aurum (UTMV meta ""self-insert""??? lives outside UTMV technically but still interacts with it, also sona number 2) (NEEDS MAJOR-ISH DESIGN UPDATE) ]

[ * About Therian!Ink ]

[ * My Youtube channel ]

[ * Cool looking badges/user boxes!!!!! ]

[ * And lastly... ]

[ * BEFORE YOU INTERACT / DNI ]

[ * originally this was a list but ehhhh ]

[ * just pls don't harass people... And don't drag me into any kind of discourse (Yup that includes shipcourse)...... Also don't be a bigot ]

(regarding shipcourse, if you THAT badly need to know, I think there's some heavy case-by-case nuance. Not everyone processes dark fiction well, but those who do I have no problem with them engaging with it however they want)

[ * AI image generators can go to the ninth circle of hell though ]

[ * I'm too tired on a daily basis to go around checking everyone's DNIs so wahhhh ]

[ * That's pretty much it! Have a nice day! ]

[moononmyfloor]

Dashing Youth Ep 1-10 Commentary

Ep 11-16, Ep 17-21, Ep 22-25, Ep 26-32, Ep 33-35, Ep 36-40

Alrighty let's organise all my thoughts in neat lil piles.

1. Personally the type of Wuxia I enjoy is the more subdued, mature and philosophical vibe like that of Sword Snow Stride and Mysterious Lotus Casebook. I rarely watch youthful, lighthearted, rom-comey wuxia/xianxia/xuanhuan. I didn't enjoy BoY a lot and I still wonder how I managed to finish it, the few characters I loved were Wuxin, Tang Lian, Zhao Yuzhen, Prince Chong and Prince Lingchen, because they had the acting style and character arcs that were closer to my preferences.

I clicked on Dashing Youth just for the curiosity and out of "since I watched BoY anw, I'm kinda obligated for this" feeling, but unexpectedly, within 10 mins I was in love lol. Many of the actors I already know and love, the bromance is instantaneous and strong, the promise of a good tragedy is alluring, and I could enter the worldbuilding faster because I already know what to expect from this universe.

AND I ADORE how the casting directors seem to have chosen actors with BLs/BL-vibe shows under their belt for all the important roles, they all know exactly what to do and like:

I for one am not mad about all the CP pushing promo the showmakers are doing. I mean, even if this was a super straight story we'll end up with gay fanfics anyway, right? So just as well we get to see our fantasies haha 😏

Like, that's an adorable thumbnail!

OK without further ado, getting myself invited into the Daddies' party time!!

By ep 4, Dongjun has so far charmed the asses off of Spear daddy, Lei daddy, and now Liu Xueyi's daddy. At this rate, I'll have to assume that the future kids are gonna be procreated not via their future wives, but through the consummation of the daddies' elaborate spiritual bodies when they flirt-duel lol

(Exactly like that)

Now I really wanna see a 重回我爸的高中时代 (Back to My Dad's High School Days) edit for Dongjun and his harem from the kids' povs Like here .

Ep 6- You did indeed, Wu Xie 2.5!

Hou Minghao collects new boyfriends, old boyfriends and his own other-selves like pokemon😆 Also gotta say that everytime I see Bai Shu now I feel like a proud parent. He's grown so much from the grumpy scrawny bb Wu Xie era huhu

Ep 9- It's amazing how I personally didn't really enjoy BoY, but Wuxin instantly got my love and while I'm 10x more drawn to Dashing Youth, the one who won me over above everyone else is again, Wuxin's dad. Also, Wuxin's dad is a chef! How can I not love this baby!

Everyone showing off martial arts while they are in their own world, serving a buffet lmao

Lei Mengsha looking at this poster: Yep, I can see this polycule is not a good idea. Usually I'm all in but I'll sit this one out and go make my two kids in peace. I'll have my chance with HMH in another universe anw

Despite being the silliest of them all, LMS is the only one who gives the vibe he'll always stand straight on his two feet even if the entire world goes topsy-turvy. I don't even need to look at BoY to be proven correct.

Ep 10- Ever since his intro from ep 1 where he went all, "wow, what a fate!", I love the parts they do these crossover jokes

(In fact, instinctively performing Qimen Dunjia is possibly how LMS figured out the trajectory the other boys were going to be in LMAO)

Now they need to add some tomb robbing jokes when Bai Shu and Neo interact and it'd be perfect!

Also it feels kinda fateful that Lei Wujie would go bond with Xiao Se, Lei Mengsha was best bros with his uncle Langya.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s4 episode 15 thoughts

life is so fun when there is mulder and scully time to look forward to <3

(post episode thoughts: not sure how i feel about this one. i definitely didn’t hate it, don’t get me wrong, but it was really sad and after last week’s sad episode i’m ready for some happy times. i’m also trying to figure out what exactly the meaning of this episode was because there’s a detail in there that really threw me off- i shall elaborate late.

nonetheless, i thought it was an interesting ep…. just saddened the heart, and i’m trying to parse out the meaning of the whole thing. maybe that detail of which i speak was just a throwaway line and i’m overthinking everything? this has been known to happen.

but, please keep in mind: i am not an expert on all things, including jewish culture- which could perhaps explain my interpretation of the episode/confusion on its overall theme- and if i made any mistakes please feel free to point them out, but understand that they were not made intentionally and that i am merely a fan blog who is living, laughing, loving, and learning each day)

i’m so excited to see what happens next after such an amazing episode last time!! and i know better than to expect a direct continuation of that storyline. BUT a girl can hope! we covered some pretty important territory in the previous one, so to pretend it didn’t happen wouldn’t make a ton of sense- but that is usually how these things go lol

(author's note: this is exactly how things went)

also, i know a lot of people headcanon mulder as jewish, so i’m interested to see what the episode brings/if i will also be sold on the hc! i’ve definitely subscribed to it up until now, so i’m interested to see if it’ll convince me more.

without further ado…

we begin with a man praying in hebrew in new york. sadly, we are at a funeral. everyone is in black. but the way this camera is especially focused on this woman in black is leading me to believe that she is gonna be the star of the episode.

we see, through her eyes, someone being terribly attacked. she is crying as she throws some dirt onto the coffin.

we also see that the man holding her hand has numbers tattooed on his arm, which implies he is a holocaust survivor, and makes this hate crime in america all the more horrific for him to have experienced.

i would guess that this man is maybe lead woman in black's father? he is leading her away from the funeral :(

at the cemetery in the rain, we see someone making a human form out of mud? dirt? clay? actually. what is the line between mud and clay? never thought about that. not the point, though. the mud clay dirt man begins to breathe!

this must be the golem referred to in the episode description…

(spooky intro time…. always a nice ritual for me)

so, the man who was murdered was named isaac luria, scully lets us know. he was from an area of brooklyn known for racial tensions and hate crimes, two of which mulder recites off the top of his head. he is the type of guy to recite facts.

the only thing that was taken from the market where the crime went down was the surveillance tape, which was found in the VCR of a 16 year old tony.

(was that guy we saw earlier doing the shooting supposed to be 16? because he looked 25 at the youngest. yeah, hard to suspend my disbelief in that regard, having a memory of what being 16 was like)

oh! the twist is… tony is dead now! strangled to death while watching the tape. mulder says this is “very old testament”.... interesting choice of words there

and the fingerprints of the strangler WERE THAT OF isaac luria!!! mulder seems greatly intrigued by this. has me wondering how that would go down.

scully is convinced that it is a resurrection hoax, and they must figure out how someone got a dead man’s fingerprints. mulder makes some joke about casper never leaving behind fingerprints. well casper was a FRIENDLY ghost, so maybe that is the difference! casper was not intended to be a creature of revenge. actually, i could be wrong there. haven't seen the movie since i was a kid.

the agents are off to new york, and i was right, that man we saw before was the crying woman’s father. his name is jacob weiss and hers is ariel luria.

scully looks so pretty :(

it seems they’re holding shiva, and showing up with a request to reopen luria's grave is not welcomed. understandably so!

apparently jacob had called the police before the attack, who had said they were paranoid. mulder asks “so there was a specific threat of violence?” and he answers “the threat is always there” <- damn….

then he hands mulder a flyer that was slid under their door with some horrible antisemitic stuff on it that actually made me flinch

jacob seems to slip that he knows who did the murder… but refuses to cooperate. and after they explain that they can get the court to order them to dig the body back up, ariel says to do what they need to, but to please leave them alone.

and from her perspective, it does seem like mulder and scully are just here to stir up trouble- it sounds like they’re trying to protect the murderers, and like they want to make her suffer by digging her husband back up, but i’m wondering if saying “we found your dead husband’s fingerprints on the boy’s corpse” would go over even worse

(they also keep looking at that one guy tony that did the murder and calling him a “boy” as if to emphasize his youth. but again. he looks like 25, so. maybe should have cast someone else if that was the point they wanted to make)

agents in the raaaain going to the car. scully oh my GOD she’s so beautiful. so so so so so so SO beautiful. 

she thinks that jacob doesn’t want them messing with the grave because it will somehow reveal who did the killing of tony. i’m not sure i buy it. sorry scully. he would be too obvious.

mulder pulls the horrible pamphlet out of his pocket and says that whoever published it probably knows who killed isaac AND tony. how tight knit is the community of people who print hateful pamphlets to slide under doors? something i have genuinely never asked myself but now i’d like to know. 

omg!!!! someone covered in dirt is watching them!!! did the golem turn into a person? why did i think he was going to stay made of mud? this is definitely a dirty man and not a mere man of dirt! and he has a mark on his hand

OHHHH some horrific antisemitism from the guy who they are questioning, later revealed to be named curt. oh my god???? he says mulder “looks like he might be one” and that the FBI “works for them” and blah blah blah

what the hell…… sometimes i forget that people spouting such horrific stuff are people with faces and names……… you might read it in awful internet comments, but you forget those are Real Human People who are saying those words. at least, sometimes i do. perhaps that was also the point of including him, to personify this hatred.

it seems that one of the boys who did the killing is watching all of this go down through the surveillance camera in curt's shop. mulder makes a snappy comment about a jew coming back from the dead 2,000 years ago in response to whatever tf this dude’s name is (again, later revealed to be curt, do NOT get him confused with kurt with a k from last episode) being a dick about the resurrection allegations involving luria. and scully says well i assume you don’t want to be responsible for these young men dying! and they leave.

ooooo mulder tells him “bless you” as he leaves…. he is gonna mess w this guy. and i appreciate that.

but gasp… the "kid" has disappeared from the back room!

now why is this kid hanging around with this older man? and why is he killing people? there are a LOT of questions here. if i’m supposed to care if he gets taken by the golem… i simply don’t. 

the two surviving boys (who again, look older than me, a person above the age of 16) are digging up luria’s grave to see if he really did rise from the dead. but oh no! someone is watching them!!

damn, one of the killer children is dead. oh nooo i’m so sad (said with deep sarcasm)

the other one finds luria’s body just as the killing goes down, and luria appears very dead. the surviving one is being taken by the cops???

scully at the scene. looking at the dead kid. seems he was also strangled. 

scully says maybe they came to desecrate the corpse? but mulder says they were probably scared he came back from the dead. hmm.

they’re trying to figure out what exactly is going on when mulder pulls a book out from under dead isaac’s head and it catches on fire!!! what!!! how did that happen!!!!

the creep from the copy shop is clocking in. the last surviving kid (? i think idk they all look the same? unless someone else came back from the dead?) is saying he killed the man because he didn’t sit back and just spread propaganda like this guy curt does. 

well. that is a sharp reminder of how hate speech leads to hate crimes.

the book that was burnt is being analyzed. it’s the book of creation, the sepher yetzirah- but this is not something that a jewish person is buried with! no worldly possessions are allowed in the grave. so how did it get there???? did they decide to make a special exception to the rule or something?? and if so, for what purpose?

“has it ever been known to spontaneously combust?” <- LMAO mulder i know you’re being serious but 😭

scully’s talking scientific theories on chemicals making books blow up, but he is not buying it at all. keeps questioning the book guy.

oh! someone’s name is on the book!! JACOB WEISS!!! what!!!!

now i bet that someone planted that there…..

so they go back to the weiss household. ariel is very sad to hear about her father's book being at the scene, as you can imagine. 

oh wait….ariel and isaac never actually got married…. omg this changes things……… wait. now it's even sadder. and it was already really sad :(

she’s showing them a ring that every woman married in the synagogue wears, that her father had hidden during the war. mulder looks really really really upset by all of this. 

scully asks where ariel’s father is, but ariel promises he wouldn’t kill anyone. well. that doesn't exactly answer the question

agents rolling up to the synagogue. everyone must have had a lot of questions as to what the duo in trenchcoats were up to.

it seems jacob exited out a back door? it’s investigation time….

OMG the last kid has been hanged!! someone is running away from this!!!!!!!!! everything is dark and i cannot see. 

NOOO mulder is down…. and scully is down too, but she fired a shot off…. at jacob???? that was who was down here?? hmm i’m not buying it. seems too easy. 

aha! that dirt covered hand is also at the scene!

ariel is at the jail asking to see her father. and scully seems very sad to inform her that he is under arrest. 

mulder’s asking jacob why he killed him. jacob says that the kid was up in the attic and he defended himself. by hanging him? hm.

he seems shocked that his book was at the crime scene, and professes his guilt, but mulder isn’t buying it. he says someone else was up there in the attic and WHO WAS IT?

mulder picks some dirt off of his sleeve…. suggesting he is onto him….

it seems that jacob had bombed people back in israel 1959? wait. if that was the case, then how did he get to new york… 

(this line confused me greatly, because what did it add to the story? it felt like it had Implications that just. were not explored)

“he’s not our killer, though” “what do you mean? i… he just gave a confession, i stood here and listened to it” <- she sounded so shocked lmaoooo

mulder launches his second person in the attic theory. couldn’t have been the daughter. because the person shoved mulder down. mulder is big strong man.

OH! jacob says he confessed to protect ariel. omg it’s clicking… she must have used the book to make the golem, and he is taking the fall for the golem’s actions. 

the print shop guy is printing more of his horrible pamphlets and oh my god he has a nazi flag on his wall…. jesus. it’s always such a visceral jumpscare to see those. something is approaching him…… and choking him…. and the hand is dirty and has the same mark as before!!

mulder is going back to talk to the book guy to ask about the sepher yetzirah and the golem. book guy explains that it was believed a righteous man could make a man himself out of mud or clay (mud or clay! used interchangeably here! this does not help me figure out what the difference between them is), but it could only be brought to life by the power of the word. certain letter combinations. you put the word on the hand and bam.

mulder says he doesn’t speak hebrew, so he doesn’t know what emet means, but omg!!! it means truth!!! the truth…… it haunts him

apparently the golem is imperfect and must be destroyed by its creator. which you do by erasing the first letter to turn “emet” into “met”, which means dead. 

scully phone call time!! curt (the printing man) is dead (well. if i'm supposed to be sad. i'm not)

more strangling….. but at least we know that this time it wasn’t jacob that did it, because he was still in jail

they look onto the surveillance footage and gasp! it looks like the killer is isaac luria!! so did the golem take his form??? huh. that's creepy.

luria is again confirmed as very much dead, so mulder must explain his theory.

“a ghost is spirit without form, but i believe what we’re looking for and what we’re seeing here is form without spirit” <- i want him to make a compilation of his worldview so bad just so i can read it 

(indignant scully voice) "MUD?!?" <- lmaooooo she never gets used to his ideas 😭 

back to ariel’s… which is suspiciously unlocked. wherever she is, she has the ring!!!

at the synagogue, jacob is there with a candle. he’s also looking for ariel. 

ariel says to “leave us alone” WHO IS US?? the golem???! but jacob won’t leave without her.

what she brought back isn’t him…. 

they’re both crying as she recounts what happened; she made a golem, which took the form of isaac, but it isn't truly him

but da agents are here now…. and JACOB IS BEING HANGED???? so the golem does not have her best interests at heart.

mulder pulls out a handy knife to cut him down!!! mulder keeps a knife on him….. huh. i’ll analyze that later. 

scully is working her doctor skills while mulder goes on a hunt for ariel, who he finds on the floor. 

ohhhh but the golem is here….. and she’s begging him not, to but mulder is shooting at the golem…. it isn’t doing anything. and now he’s choking mulder.

she offers “isaac” the ring…. and he puts it on her hand….

but she wipes off the first letter!!!! and he crumbles!!!!

scully is here to find mulder!!!!! while ariel is saying goodbye 

that is the end of the episode, which is dedicated to lillian katz. a google search leads me to believe that she was the episode writer’s grandmother 

hmm. what am i thinking….?

well, this was a sad one. a very sad one. which i had been warned was going to keep happening over and over again until i hit episode 20. and yet! here i am! still sad!

i take it that this one was likely very personal to the writer, if that really is the writer’s grandmother that this was dedicated to and google is not lying to me. 

i think it covered really important topics, especially about how rhetoric turns into violence, and the two are inseparable. 

here’s something i’m confused about: why did they throw in that line about jacob being a terrorist? was it supposed to show that hate can effect all people, like how mulder said hate was a two-way street? it just feels like it didn’t actually serve any purpose beyond being a red herring to try and get you to think it was jacob and not the golem that did the killing. but what does that do to the narrative, to highlight someone who has suffered at the hands of hatred- and then put a different hatred of his own into that character’s hands? this is a thing that happens in real life, and real life is messy and complicated, but i feel a bit thrown off on that for the basic plot reason of “if he killed 7 people then how did he get to new york”.

implications aside of someone surviving a genocide and then inflicting the pain of death onto others, which i will admit i feel hesitant about but don’t even know where to begin in approaching that, it stuck out to me as weird and unrealistic. i mean, if they were trying to show that hate was a two-way street (which is… an interesting way of seeing things anyway), jacob’s hatred of the boys who killed isaac was already well fleshed out without a random terrorist point. is the story trying to say that everyone hates something or someone, and we are all capable of being driven to horrible things? or what? i’m a little lost on the overall meaning, and maybe i have to wrestle with it for a bit. it's not like the hatred of an oppressor to the oppressed and the hatred of the oppressed to their oppressor are moral equivalents.

i feel i wasn’t supposed to take home the message that using golems to kill nazis is a good thing but. well. if i was supposed to be sympathetic to curt and the murder boys and see their potential to change and be good people deep down, i didn’t get the memo. and also they kept calling these men who looked like college graduates "boys", as if to emphasize how hate corrupts the next generations, but. again. they did not look like boys. so if they were trying to make that point, i feel it fell a bit flat.

in terms of the jewish mulder headcanon... like i had said, i had been subscribing to it myself, but honestly, i didn't feel anything happened here where i was like "omg, canon proof!" i think if he had known the word on luria/the golem's hand i would have been more compelled to think so. but his line about hate being a two-way street felt weird, and when he didn't understand that there doesn't need to be a specific threat of violence for the threat to always be there in a jewish community also felt a little like he didn't know what he was talking about. also, he described the death at the beginning as "very old testament", which felt odd. it is an odd thing to say at all, but given that it is such a christian term, it felt loaded.

maybe, if you have this headcanon, you imagine that he grew up without knowing much about the culture associated with it? what do you think? do you subscribe to that headcanon?

while the episode was touching, i found myself confused on what exactly it was trying to say. i guess i'll leave it at that.

did you like it? did you have a solid interpretation on what it was trying to say and if it said it well? to me it felt like it was trying to be a lesson on how hate corrupts all but that also seems simplistic.

tell me all the thoughts.

[enddaysengine]

Shinigami (Paths Beyond)

When the cycle of life and death is disrupted, relentless and towering outsiders seek out the cause and drag offenders back to their proper fates. Old Planescape hands can be forgiven for thinking I’m talking about the marut, but today’s topic is shinigami.

There is a point to that intro, too. While the 2e marut stats still exist, they will be casualties of the OGL/ORC transition from here on out. While losing such a classic monster is a bummer, shinigami can admirably fill their niche. Maruts were beloved for being implacable and terrifying. While their aesthetic is very different, shinigami check off both boxes. Next time the PCs try to become immortal, they may be pursued by a small death god instead of a ruthless onyx statue. 

It is worth noting that while shinigami don’t have much in the way of elemental resistances in 2e, their fast healing 40 is high enough that they can tank the damage from moderate environmental hazards. The majority of the Plane of Fire deals moderate environmental damage. Sure, it probably will hurt like hell (literally), and it is worth protecting themselves if they know they are headed for the inner sphere. If push comes to shove, a shinigami can stride through the most hostile planes and be fine.

Who needs frightful presence when that’s scary enough as it is? (Although shinigami have a frightful presence as well, so they are bloody terrifying in every sense. Good luck. Fighting that.)

The party wakes one day to find a shinigami sitting cross-legged in the town center, watching people go about their lives. If questioned, Togusa the Judicator responds simply that he is gathering evidence and refuses to elaborate further. Over the next few days, the party gets the distinct impression he is watching them specifically. Worse, the shinigami somehow lurks at the edge of their dreams, keeping them under 24/7 surveillance. Following the monitor into its nocturnal mindscape reveals each party member is the reincarnation of an infamous historical figure who wasn’t supposed to be reincarnated. 

Æown Coppereye has terrorized the Five Kings Mountains for thirteen generations with his ruthless brand of justice. While not as renowned as the Whispering Tyrant or Arazni, the dwarven lich is still dangerous and frequently used as a bogeyman in children’s tales. While the psychopomps would love to see him join Purgatory’s ranks, he is clad in a robe of shinigami bones he stole from the Boneyard. It allows him to flit between dimensions and hides him from all of death’s agents, regardless of which god they serve. Mortal heroes must chase him across the planes if he is to be stopped.

Corruption in the Boneyard is a strange thing. Pharasma does not condone priests who spread cruelty and malice, but Eshi Ōko delights in such acts. The shinigami arranges for powerful artifacts to wind up in mortal hands, then watches the fallout as power goes to their heads. While Lord Eshi’s antics often lead to significant pain and suffering, he is careful not to disrupt the River of Souls or the cycle of life and death. Eshi has a network of adventures and criminals willing to assist his schemes or compromise their morals in exchange for access to the afterlife. Still, he is merciless to those who violate the cycle of souls or deal with oni and nindoru. 

[sternenhimmel-mond]

A woman from the broken province of Cyrodiil flees home after being disgraced from her family of lower noble status. She can no longer face them, she can't take the way they look at her and talk to her now. She heads north and unintentionally crosses the border into Skyrim, but by the time she realizes, it's too late. She's on a prisoner's cart with the leader of the rebellion ravaging the province and wasting valuable resources. They're on their way to an execution. After surviving the dragon attack that saves her life and helping a few people, she learns she is Dragonborn. A mortal with the ability to speak like the dragons and project her voice into a weapon. Along her journey to ridding the world of dragons, she gets cold feet and abandons her position as the savior of the world. She gets sucked into a scheme while trying to look for someone she had met previously, and joins the infamous guild of thieves that seems to have lost their spark, disgraced in their own way. She doesn't always like committing crimes, but these people look after each other, and what more could she hope for after what happened back home? All is well until a betrayal occurs, she's left for dead and she spooks like a wild deer, choosing to let everyone in the guild believe she's dead and she disappears. She wants to help people again, but doesn't trust the woman that was helping her destroy the dragons, so she looks into why a 10 year old boy would be summoning the all but eradicated Dark Brotherhood- the guild of assassins serving the Dread Father Sithis. The child begs her to kill the woman in charge of an orphanage. She knows that the Dark Brotherhood is either no longer a thing, or being very unprofessional by leaving this boy unanswered for a few months, so she takes it upon herself to help him out. After killing the orphanage owner, she gets kidnapped by the leader of what's left of the assassins guild. The leader promises her she can leave alive as long as she pays back her debt to them, and when she does, she is asked to join her little family. The woman is free to go and takes up the leader's offer, if only to have a family again. Killing people would be more of a means to an end, as what she really craved was a family. Another betrayal, but this time she decides she's done running, she fixes as much as she can from the fallout of this betrayal and decides she has to return to the thieves guild and stop the man who betrayed her from hurting the others. But she has some preparations to make before she shows her face there again.

Her name is Serelynn.

I have been playing a Skyrim character that I'm using to write a story with. I have had to change some in game events and dialogue to make it all fit right and sound better. Right now I'm nearing the end of what I planned and might go further after the planned story closes, but I also might not, the current stopping point is after she becomes the leader of the thieves guild. I have most of it written down, but it will need to go through a few editing sessions to make it all make more sense and sound better and whatever else. Also, as it stands right now, I skipped ahead in my writing to a little later in the main questline because trying to write the intro to the game up until kynesgrove felt so tedious and clunky to me. I might go back and write it in anyway. But for now, I want to know if anyone is interested in this story. There's a lot of details I left out, or perhaps I even added too much detail to my outline, but I figure an overall idea of certain story beats would help people decide if they like her or not.

As always, I would like to ask that this gets reblogged so more people will see it, but no pressure. I've been working on this for a long time now, and I hope people will be interested so I can share it instead of just keeping it to myself.

[benjaminbadger]

I'm sorry gay people in my phone but the new Doctor Who has thoroughly fucking confused me and was kind of a letdown

Thoughts under cut

I thought they were gonna genuinely do something with the story and aliens being extremely generic? Like. The Doctor regenerates back into their 10th form, coincidentally near Donna Noble, coincidentally while a plot's going on that feels like a self parody of Dr Who as a show. Tiny overly cutesy alien, gets found by and connects with teen who hides it from family, getting hunted down by big scary alien army, scenes like the plushie hiding thing that feel pulled straight out of a generic 80s scifi family film??

The Meep being evil was obviously gonna happen but I assumed there would be a second twist to it? Like, maybe they were both an elaborate set up bc some larger entity wanted 10 and Donna together. I thought bc it was the anniversary they were going the meta approach by making a threat that basically encapsulates the exact set up you imagine when you think about the show, mashing all the tropes together into one adventure made especially to encourage Donna and 10 back into the old days. Even the end with an oops silly mistake resulting in them being stuck together in the Tardis.

BUT THEN. THEY PLAYED IT COMPLETELY STRAIGHT?? AND THE EPISODE JUST ENDS?? NOT EVEN ANY CHARACTER ACKNOWLEDGING HOW WEIRD THIS WHOLE SITUATION WAS???? JUST COMPLETELY ACTING NORMAL. EVEN THE DOCTOR

I'm seriously hoping that this is explained later on as a setup for somethig larger, and that in later rewatches it'll be way more satisfying. But rn I'm confused as hell and disappointed, and if the show wasn't so important to my childhood I proly wouldn't wanna watch further. If it is all setup then... I don't want an exclusively setup episode. That's lame. At the very least if you ARE going that direction foreshadow it better

Some minor things I'm nitpicking also

- I know Doctor Who isn't meant to be that serious but come on the intro of David Tennant just greenscreened standing in space explaining the setup was so goofy it made me howl (and I don't think that was intentional)

- I love an important trans character, that's based as hell, but the trying to act relevant and appeal to Gen Z was kind of annoying. Not as in "Grrr my old show is woke 😡" I'm literally one of the wokes. As in "Haha women are so much cooler and smarter than men 😏 Doctor assuming pronouns 😳 Binary Nonbinary 😁😁" "🦡 Wow that's not very funny and a little irritating, it feels like a cistraight guy wrote this". It was a funny episode and some bits of this were funny but certainly not others

- For real tho I'm obsessed w "Binary Nonbinary" that's so fucking stupid

- For all the set up and stakes put on Donna remembering the Doctor, the way it resolved felt like a copout. Passing down and sharing the power was fine but literally just going "Nuh uh" and sending it away?? I really feel like that diminishes how importantly the time lord power was set up just for the sake of Donna being alive for more episodes. If they need her they could've at least let the two deal with it together for a while, before finding a better way to get rid of it down the line

- ^ It also made Donna's death have less impact for the problem to be solved in such an easy way. Her dying was emotional, was well executed, until it wasn't and she was fine and she was back having fun doctor times and woo!! everything to do with her absorbing that power and losing her memory is done and dusted and doesn't need further exploring 😁😁👍👍 I mean come on man..... give us something............

TLDR special was very fun but I expected it to do something interesting and subversive and it ended up playing the parody of itself completely straight. I'm hoping as more stuff comes out the showrunners are proven to be complete masterminds who purposefully made it like that and I'm gonna look like a bumbling idiot

[staring-at-my-keyboard]

Haven pt 3

୨⎯✎✎⎯୧

part 1 || part 2

The longest installment and final part of @torturingpeople's tender pathologist coming to live with my own OCs! Just three fellows being soft.

OC intros

POV: Tender Pathologist

୨⎯✎✎⎯୧

Angst

Hurt/Comfort

Fluff

TWs

⇾ none!

୨⎯✎✎⎯୧

“If you could refrain from describing what… precisely occurred in that hallway with that man, I would appreciate it.” Thomas said to me quietly as we stood outside his and Atlas’ dark wood door.

“Oh, of course.” I nodded, trying to convince myself I was agreeing out of friendship and not fear of what would be done to me if I disobeyed.

We were standing in a dim, plushly-carpeted hallway between several apartments, one of which belonged to the couple that had dared to extend affection towards me. The building we were in was large, and apparently equally ornate inside as it was outside: elaborate carvings and ornamented sconces characterized the outer and inner walls, and the carpet beneath us was of a Persian pattern heavy on whites and blues (so different to red). If the main building were not enough, the polished wood of the door and shining metal doorknob set into the middle (an odd choice, although that seemed to be common through all the residences here) did well to suggest that where Thomas and Atlas lived was far from cheap; the pair were clearly well-off.

As I mused, Thomas withdrew a set of keys from somewhere on his person and unlocked the door, pushing it open to reveal an entry parlor of surprising size that still managed to have an air of coziness. As I looked around, noting the open kitchen set in the corner almost opposite of the entrance and the nearby dining table, I realized this was less of a parlor and more just the main area of the apartment.

The floor was soft and dark red, not quite reminiscent of blood, and the carpet cut off abruptly for the kitchen and table. In my direct line of sight from the door was a pair of rather opulent matching armchairs with an end table and lamp between them, all in front of a large marble hearth that had a smattering of rather expensive-looking keepsakes on the mantle, all below a gorgeous painting of a castle bathed in moonlight. Along the same wall as the hearth were bookshelves, stretching from floor to coffered ceiling, packed with tomes and the occasional barely-bound set of papers. The wall opposite of the door had a large chesterfield couch, standing lamp beside it and coffee table in front of it, that sat right next to a hallway extending further into the apartment.

In one of the armchairs sat Atlas, warmly lit by a roaring fire and book open in his lap, who had subtly jumped at Thomas and I’s entry.

“Mountain-Sherd, the pathologist is here! I have managed to wrest him from beneath that horrible man, and he has accepted a place with us.” Thomas declared happily.

Atlas quickly rose, flapping his hands gleefully as he approached us before taking my own. I noted with interest that, for the first time in my knowing him, he was not wearing gloves. The skin of his hands felt… odd, but before I could scrutinize them further an excited voice drew my attention back to his face.

“Marvelous! You can take the guest bedroom, for as long as you like! Perhaps we could change it to further suit your tastes over the duration of your stay. We shall read together every night if you wish, and take tea every afternoon. I will show you my lab, and perhaps you could resume your career.” His smile grew. “There is much to do together. I am glad you have decided to stay with us. I am glad to be your friend.”

My vision blurred, yet my immediate fear of having another seizure was promptly dissuaded by the feeling of moisture tracking down my cheeks.

I don’t think there had ever been an instance in my life that I cried from happiness before then.

I was as surprised as I’m sure Atlas was alarmed, his excited speech becoming a litany of apologies and inquiries as to what was wrong. I could only sob in response as I brought my hands to my face in a vain attempt to wipe away what was now a waterfall of tears bursting from my eyes.

“Thank you.” I barely managed to choke out, far beyond the point of feeling any humiliation over my broken voice.

I was promptly pulled into an embrace. While I could not see for the life of me, the superior height led me to realize it was Thomas who had wrapped me within his arms. My sobs only grew stronger when I realized just how alien the feeling of a warm, genuine hug was. I managed to summon the strength to wrap my own arms around the man that held me, and as I clutched at his jacket and wept into his shoulder he swayed us from side to side.

“Go on, go on.” He muttered into my ear. “You are safe now.”

Not realizing it was even possible until after the fact, I cried even harder as relief and joy and stress and fear, along with the exhaustion I never allowed myself to show, descended upon me like collapsing stone.

We stayed like that for a length of time that was impossible to determine, only measured by the weakness in my legs and the sizable damp spot I left in the fabric of Thomas’ clothing once my tears finally ran dry. 

I drew away; despite the thought of remaining enfolded within those arms forever being a rather appealing one, I knew it was equally illogical. That and, some small part of me dared to imagine, hugs would not be the scant rarity that they always were before.

Thomas’ gaze bore into mine, but it was not with the all-pervading cruelty or expectation of obedience characteristic of Dr. Hanna’s own stares– no, it simply held a tender concern, the utter darkness of his eyes providing a lovely contrast to what I was used to.

“I am alright.” 

Neither of us knew if that were true, but I imagine he dared to hope it would be as much as I. Maybe one day I would be completely rid of that writhing, rotting part of myself that was disgusted by the distance– this betrayal– of Dr. Hanna; that insisted I return, that hoped with a giddy fear and misplaced loyalty that if I went back quick enough he would show mercy, if he even noticed my absence (of course he would notice my absence).

Maybe one day.

For that moment, however, I simply did my best to brush it aside and bury it deep, refusing to acknowledge its babbling as Atlas approached with an offered mug of tea. The saucer below it held a small collection of snacks and sugar cubes, and Atlas’ own face held a comforting smile that still brimmed with nervous worry.

“You’ve said nothing wrong.” I found myself reassuring him, taking the offered porcelain. “I was simply… overwhelmed. It was a positive overwhelm though; I don’t think I’ve ever cried from happiness before.”

“It is an odd feeling, isn’t it?” Thomas piped up in a light tone as he and Atlas began shepherding me to the dining table. “My own first time experiencing such a thing was with him, as well. I still recall how terrified he was that he had done something horribly wrong.”

“Of course I was terrified!” Atlas replied as we sat– Thomas beside me, him opposite us– the choler in his tone undercut by an embarrassed amusement. “Imagine giving a gift you are unsure of, and the reaction of the recipient is to burst into tears!”

Thomas only hummed fondly before reaching across the table with an open hand. Atlas accepted.

“You give people so much joy, my heart, that they are unsure of what to do with it. You are lovelier than words can express.”

Atlas blushed, and smiled like a newlywed, before leaning forward to bring his partner’s hand to his lips.

You would be forgiven for assuming me to feel bitter, or awkward at this display, but for some reason I did not. That automatic desire to seek out Dr. Hanna was still present but significantly reduced; something about the way Thomas and Atlas treated each other, something about how they openly viewed the way Dr. Hanna treated me, helped me begin the long journey of realizing that I myself would receive far more genuine affection at the hands of this odd, besotted Victorian couple than than what was even possible from Dr. Hanna.

My heart settled, and I smiled from behind my mug of tea. Thomas’ earlier words rang in my head.

'You are safe now.'

[3/3]

୨⎯✎✎⎯୧

[il3x]

mucka blucka (intro into cacophony) by Chonny Jash is a huge Shallan song (unfortunately it works even better when you know chonny jash lore which i doubt you know)

OUGHBH GOD YEAG. even from the album cover I can see it's gonna be good. alas I do not know the lore but I'll do my best!

huh this kinda fits with how much she controls and conditions her own mental state...

she do be a bard (Lightweaver)

yeah! this lyric is also a kenzie lyric btw :)

and now i. am having Emotions about shallan using jokes and stories and art as emotional first-aid for her brothers. shallan the emotional field medic, putting pressure on the wound even as the bullets rain down. she's a bit like kaladin with bridge 4. trying her damnedest to help those around her even in an actively traumatising situation.

LMAO, OKAY, THERE'S LOW HANGING FRUIT HERE...

...but I'm really more invested in this bit, which I think also fits her past. Trying to help her brothers but knowing that the abuse just keeps recurring.

GOD, FUCK, YEAH. yeah. YEAH. that's her past. we've seen the effects of Lin's abuse of her brothers, now we're seeing the trauma he inflicted on her by forcing her to put up the perfect-daughter facade in front of guests - the me that's shown to everyone else. "Gets paraded" also hits; I think Shallan's past was a lot more dehumanising than many people realise, that she was treated in large part as an ornament to use. And "stuck underground" fits with how she's restricted physically to the house, restricted socially to her family and immediate guests, restricted emotionally and unable to express herself except in fear behind closed doors, restricted intellectually with her neglected education.

fits on vibes alone! the contradiction of shallan davar. I'm sure there's way more to say about this too. To me, it's Shallan in Kharbranth - pride in what education she did manage to scrape, and joy in her newfound freedom, clashing with her hidden mission to steal Jasnah's Soulcaster, her shame at realising how insufficient her education was, and the echoes of her father (and mother, though I won't elaborate because spoilers for the asker)'s treatment on her self-esteem. Also, she's seeing Pattern here, and thinks she's going mad. Fun times!

The "I/We" pronoun shift is also interesting. Someone who knows more about DID could probably say more about it than me, but from what I understand DID develops to deal with trauma, and some alters take on more(?) of that trauma - so maybe this shows the Three system as a whole taking on the burden, while Shallan gets a breather to act as a more carefree scholar? But then again, I'm pretty sure she wasn't plural yet at this point, so idk if it would work that way.

AND SPEAKING OF THE THREE AS A SYSTEM!! I don't think this necessarily maps directly onto the Three, but it's kind of the same idea, right? Different parts of oneself to take on traumas/'tolls'.

And this is exactly what Shallan consciously wants, thinks she needs, but must move away from as a Lightweaver. She must admit truths about 'the man behind the lines', whom she hides with jokes and art, to progress in her Oaths and character arc.

This whole part feels like her trying to turn Pattern away at the start of their bond. Which I don't recall whether she did, but feels like something she would do.

[cough] LIGHTWEAVER!!!!!!

This bit reminds me of how Hoid tried to help out younger Shallan, iirc, encouraged her, but she still had to go back to her home and experience further trauma.

h.ough. yeag. don't really have anything to say abt this. i think this fits something (someone?) that happens in RoW, but spoilers.

[deep breaths]. holy shit. that was. a Lot. um. yeah really good song about trauma and identity and fracturing of the self and art as a means for concealing, expressing, and shaping one's identity! incredibly shallan. and incredibly Three.

[elysia-nsimp]

OC Intro: Elysian Cookie (Cookie Run: Kingdom)

Basics

Meet Elysian Cookie! She/her.

She has two forms, though you’d get her as an epic cookie (above) with her other form being accessible as a legendary costume. She’s a healer cookie at the rear of the team.

She’s a faerie, though she is not from the Silver Kingdom. She does claim to know the Elder Faerie, though, claiming they go “way back.” She will not elaborate further when asked.

Elysian Cookie always seems to know more than she should, and has a certain… presence about her. However, she brings no harm and is known for her kindness and compassion among cookies. Her voice is soft and airy, and usually quiet.

Hobbies, Talents, Preferences

Elysian Cookie is always seen around flora, with flowers growing at her feet wherever she goes. Upon moving into the Cookie Kingdom, her house is quickly surrounded by a beautiful and lush garden, to which she tends to most of the day. When not in her gardens, Elysian Cookie enjoys wandering the markets or otherwise traveling.

She almost always seems to innately know when someone nearby is injured, and, being a healer, swiftly makes her way to the injured to heal them. She gives good advice and is always happy to help, dawning a polite smile on her face almost constantly.

She’s a picky eater, only ever really eating jellies that are sweet. She seems to favour jellies with frosting on them. Elysian Cookie does not enjoy the cold, and stays indoors for almost the entirety of the winter.

Abilities

The very specifics of her in-game battle ability is. undecided, the premise is that flowers grow on the battlefield and sap HP from enemies to heal your team. I know I named it at one point but I can’t find it anymore 💔

Story-wise, flowers grow around where she steps, she can vaguely control plantlife around her, she heals obviously (both close and ranged), as well as other assorted nature-based abilities. For the most part, no one really sees her using her abilities beyond healing and growing flora.

Backstory

Elysian Cookie is a diety—her official title is The Goddess of Prosperity, but she goes by many names, all coined by mortals who have worshipped her over the years. She has existed for a very, VERY long time.

Flowers bloom and crops flourish wherever she goes, and the land she blesses is fantastic for farming even for thousands of years after. One such case of this, takes place in an old village on the shores of Beast-Yeast, known as the Frosted Lollipop Village. It’s far too small to be a kingdom, having no more than 100 residents… though, this means everyone is tight-knit and everyone knows everyone.

The Goddess of Prosperity tends to wander the lands aimlessly, as she was doing as this story begins. It was pure coincidence she stumbled upon the Frosted Lollipop Village, though the villagers claim it was fate. She was quickly accepted as one of their own and celebrated for her compassion and gentle nature, and, being alone for so long, this act of kindness from the town touched Elysian’s heart. She granted them all a blessing, that their lands would be prosperous for years to come. The townsfolk built a statue in her image in their gratitude, and many simply accepted her as their chosen ruler.

Still, Elysian was never one to want control over others… she continued her wandering, and visited the village on occasion to make sure everyone was happy and the land was fertile. Times were good, and she was happy.

That is, until a massive curse spread across the land… no one knows where it came from, but Elysian seems hesitant to talk of it’s origin. The curse was deemed The Storm, as you could see it coming from miles away by the dark, swirling clouds it created… this plague turned everything to black stone, wiping plants and animals from the forests of Beast-Yeast. It didn’t take long before it made it to the Frosted Lollipop Village, and though the villagers looked to Elysian for help, her powers just weren’t strong enough to hold it back. Everyone turned to stone, including Elysian herself. Stories say you can feel her guilt and sadness through her stone encasing.

Well, that was the story for a few thousand years, at least… that is, until a certain history-loving relic-collector with a big hat found a book about it. By this time, Elysian Cookie had actually regained most of her power, frozen in stone, and simply… broke out. It took a lot of her magic, though, so she reverted to a lesser form, mimicking that of your average cookie. This is what she calls her Disguise form, and it’s the picture you see at the top of this post! She wandered far, even traveling the Licorice Sea to Crispia, searching for other cookies who may be able to help her lift the curse that was STILL lingering over her beloved village.

Eclair Cookie saw this tale of old and decided he simply MUST go find the rest of the lost history! (This was before Olive Cookie was released lol) Elysian Cookie, who has taken refuge in the Cookie Kingdom, conveniently happens to be in the area and offers to come with… and so, a little party was created and they went off to Beast-Yeast together (under Pure Vanilla and Elysian’s protection)!

The party learned the rest of the story, and that Elysian is the goddess of the stories, and with a bunch of teamwork, they successfully got rid of the plague. Elysian learned that she doesn’t need to do everything alone anymore, so that’s great! She ended up being reunited with her people, and they thanked her for saving them and not forgetting them after all that time. She decided that she would continue to visit on occasion, but she wanted to return to the Cookie Kingdom with her friends to continue to learn and grow.

That brings us to today! There’s more lore to happen, but that hasn’t happened yet <3

Relationships

If it wasn’t clear in the story above, Elysian considers Eclair Cookie a friend. She’s even offered him relics from her past as a gift of gratitude for helping her defeat The Storm. He doesn’t know it, but she blessed his museum as well.

Elysian Cookie seems acquainted with almost every other legendary cookie, considering both Sea Fairy and Moonlight to be her friends, though she’s never seen speaking to any of them. As stated before, she also knows the Elder Faerie, and loves everyone within the Silver Kingdom.

She actually doesn’t know about the five ancient heros, as The Storm claimed her before they earned their soul jams, but as she learns of them, she decides that Pure Vanilla is her friend now and they’re getting soft tacos later :)

That being said, she does know of the fallen heroes… she seems… sad if they’re ever brought up, Shadow Milk Cookie especially. She doesn’t want to talk about it.

While Elysian Cookie does not like Dark Enchantress Cookie, she has sympathy for the Cookies of Darkness.

Strangely enough, she seems to quite like Licorice Cookie. Licorice Cookie doesn’t know exactly what to think of this, but there has been several occasions where Elysian Cookie has followed Licorice Cookie for an hour or so or made him a crown of flowers or something. Of course, this messes up his evil plans, so he’s less than pleased, but… he can’t really shake her.

Other Media

Playlist

There’s two more playlists but they’re ship playlists and I am. embarrassed.

Anyway PICTURES

Workin on more I swear lol anyway enjoy

[denizenhardwick]

Theory: How Thralldom Works

AKA What Thralldom Even Is, How It’s Somehow More Disturbing Than I Previously Thought, Why Grey’s Hand Is The Way It Is, And How All Of This Connects Knights And Tenebrous.

Warning: This theory is extremely spoileriffic, majorly for Knights of the Borrowed Dark and minorly for The Forever Court. [Note: I wrote this in 2017, before The Endless King came out. It may be worth an update and further analysis in the future, as I still believe this theory and would like to examine it now that the series is completed.]

Intro

This is a really long theory. It covers a lot, it seeks to explain a lot, but it all stems from what we know about thralldom.

Thralldom has been a mystery since it was first introduced; not much about it has been explained, yet it brings up so many questions. How does it work? Why are the Three able to do it? What the heck is going on with Grey’s hand?

The Three talk about it extremely vaguely, and The Forever Court doesn’t give much information on it beyond confirming what was already implied. However, that lack of detail, plus how plot important it is in FoCo, leads me to believe that it’s a part of something bigger.

I think that the explanation for thralldom reveals something gamechanging about the KotBD universe.

No, I don’t think I know what that is. But I know what vein it’s in.

Basics

At it’s most simplistic, the theory is that thralldom is an adapted version of what the Man in the Waistcoat did to the Opening Boy, and exploits a Knight’s connection to the Tenebrae.

Theory, Elaboration, and Evidence

Knights have a connection to the Tenebrae, described as them being “born closer to the dark.” This connection lets the fire of the Tenebrae’s sun bloom in them, and likely is the reason they can see in the dark. Besides this, we don’t know what it entails.

The Opening Boy and the Woman in White both used to be independent Tenebrous, but as of the end of KotBD, they’re part of the Clockwork Three, which is one entity in three bodies.

The Woman in White and the Man in the Waistcoat became parts of the same being because they were together for so long. The Opening Boy, however, had something done to him that made him part of the Clockwork Three.

Tenebrous are malleable, and easily change/are forced to change.

When trying to get information from Director Ackerby, the Three torture it out of him, rather than fishing through his head or anything of that sort, though they claim that they can.

In chapter 16, the Three say, “I wouldn’t fight it, little Knight. Worming into the heads of mortals is a talent of ours. Of course, the process isn’t perfect, flesh being what it is.”

They’re talking about thralldom; mortals obviously refers to humans here.

There’s also the definite implication that they use this process--or something similar--on creatures not of flesh.

We don’t know all that much about thralldom, except that it’s the process by which the Three can enter someone’s mind and control them, as well and sift through and even manipulate their memories.

I propose that their thrall process was originally designed to be used on Tenebrous, and they adapted it for Knights.

They called it a “talent,” but every other time they’ve tried to enthrall a Knight, it’s ended in that person dying. This high mortality rate would be explained it what they’re doing was meant to work on Tenebrous, who live longer and are more adaptable than humans.

The Three don’t even try getting into Ackerby’s head, and he’s a normal human, although they do make him hear ticking.

The Opening Boy--who I think the process was used on--seems to be mostly under the control of the others, though he still has a bit of free will and helps Denizen free Mercy.

It works by exploiting a Knights’ connection to the Tenebrae.

Perhaps being born closer to the dark comes with certain Tenebrous traits. A bit of their malleability, maybe? After all, they’re changed by the Tenebrae’s sun. It manifests as a fire in their chests, giving them power, but also latching onto their anger and, most importantly, turning them to iron.

Thralldom was originally a process meant to completely fuse one Tenebrous to another, and it’s being used on humans with only a little of the kind of adaptability it requires. Thus, the Three can get into Knights’ heads, but not completely change them.

Grey’s hand was turning to clockwork, which looked like it was growing out of him. This hasn’t been explained at all yet in the series, but if thralldom rides on the Tenebrous traits Knights have, this change would make sense.

Clockwork is what connects the three Tenebrous in the Clockwork Three, so that’s what would manifest.

The Cost, which also changes a Knight, notably starts in their hands, then works along the rest of their body.

Basically...

This is all really mindblowing for me, and has been freaking me out ever since I first came up with the theory. It’s disturbing, but it makes a lot of sense to me, and explains a lot of the mysteries of the series. It covers what having a “connection to the Tenebrae” actually means; it covers the Cost; it covers the Clockwork Three; it covers thralldom, and it finally explains Grey’s hand.

I’m not sure how great a job I did explaining and justifying myself, but I’ve wanted to share this theory for months, so I hope it makes sense!

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

15 Questions Tag

Got another tag by @sergeantnarwhalwrites so now Caldyn will get the questionable honor.

Thorns WIP Intro  

*sneaks up to @alittlewhump and peeks over her shoulder to see who's suffering today* :) If you want? I think everyone already had multiple of those, so otherwise open tag.

1 Are you named after anyone?

"No. Some of us… some know their name when they awaken, or quickly find one. I didn't, so eventually someone made a lot of suggestions, and I picked the one I liked most."

2 When was the last time you cried?

"I cannot cry. Not anymore."

It's clear he has no interest in elaborating further.

3 Do you have kids?

"That's not something that's possible."

4 Do you use sarcasm?

"I don't think so? I don't fully understand what that is, but I try to always say what I mean."

5 What's the first thing you notice about people?

"Their voice." He laughs. "That's too easy, isn't it? I don't know. I try to figure out how they move, how they express their emotions, how they behave towards others. It isn't always easy with the other races."

6 What's your eye colour?

"They… they say it's white now."

7 Scary books or happy endings?

"I do not like scary things."

8 Any special talents?

"I'm a good healer." He smiles. "It wasn't easy to learn how to heal humans, but I am glad I did it. I think… I think my magic is different from others'. The way I can feel the energy. And use it." His smile falters. "Life and death shouldn't exist together, yet… here I am."

9 Where were you born?

"I was not… born. My kind grows in pods on the branches of our parent tree."

10 What are your hobbies?

"Hobbies? Oh, what I like to do in my free time? Isn't all my time free?" He obviously tries to make sense of the question. "I guess... when I am not healing. Which is most of the time, because people don't get hurt that often. Then I like exploring the forest. I can feel the energy in all living things, but that doesn't mean I automatically understand what those are. And if the weather is too bad for that, then we stay at my cave, and play the games the humans gifted us, or Seyonna reads to me from the books she borrows." He laughs. "I don't understand much of it."

11 Have you any pets?

"Yes, a dog. Its name is Aska."

The leaf-covered creature sitting next to him, wagging its tail happily, is certainly no normal dog.

12 What sports do you play/have played?

"Sports?" He thinks for a bit. "I have heard of some. I think. Like, with balls? I did never… play? Any."

13 How tall are you?

"I am 2,05m! It's a normal size for my kind, but me, and my head, quickly learned humans are usually smaller."

14 Favorite subject in school?

If his expression is any indication, there was nothing about school he'd consider his 'favorite'.

"History," he says. "We'd spend so much time listening to Bre- our mentor telling us about the world and the other races. I always liked listening to him, and it wasn't as much of a problem if I kept forgetting the things he told us about."

15 Dream job?

"I'm a healer, and that's all I ever wanted to be."

[dancing-to-architecture]

44 - Jack White - Blunderbuss (2012)

I'm gonna be real, I had no idea this album even existed until this came up. I liked the White Stripes back in the mid to late 00's, but never really followed much of Jack White's solo career.

He's a damn good guitarist, though, so I'm going in to this one with slightly raised expectations.

(I also had this written out like a week and a half ago and just totally spaced on actually posting it.)

•Missing Pieces-

ooh, that electric piano works really well with Jack's guitar tones in the intro, but the solo in the middle is a killer.

Weird lyrics at first, then it slowly starts to come together by the end with a great set of closing lines:

"Sometimes someone controls everything about you

And then they tell you that they just can't live without you

They ain't lyin', they'll take pieces of you

And they'll stand above you and walk away

That's right, and take a part of you with them."

And whomst among us hasn't felt exactly that way some point?

•Sixteen Saltines-

Heavy fuzzy riffs, which is kinda what I expect from Jack White.

The name of the song is extremely weird considering it's a throwaway line, but I guess just calling it "who's jealous (of who?)" might be a bit on the nose.

•Freedom at 21-

I'm giving the text on this a small bit of a pass here because this came out a WHILE before the Me Too movement, but it feels pretty 'Men's Rights'-y imo.

"She can do whatever to me and she'll be fine because she's the woman and the man is always blamed for things" feels pretty goddamned cringey in 2023.

•Love Interruption-

This is the most "Divorced Guy" song I've ever heard in my entire life.

I will not elaborate further.

•Blunderbuss-

"A romantic bust, a blunder turned explosive blunderbuss" is some pretty fun wordplay, but as a self-diagnosed wife-guy, a few soulful minutes about the nobility of infidelity is not exactly my cup of piss.

•Hypocritical Kiss-

This song just makes me think about a number of people that I'd rather prefer stay locked away in the oubliette of my terrible memory.

•Weep Themselves to Sleep-

Okay, dude, you totally invalidated your entire premise set up by the first two lines in the second two lines.

"Nobody can do [x] like I can, except all these guys."

The instrumentation is really nice, the piano kills it, but the lyrics are... not great. 'Billy Corgan Poetic', by which I mean they're pretty, have an interesting metric foot, and they rhyme nicely, but are otherwise inscrutable.

Weird choice for the central song.

•I'm Shakin'-

Jack White sings the dirty blues.

...At least he's better at it than a good number of other white guys who have attempted it.

The idea of referring to the story of Samson and Delilah as "(she) clipped his wig" is just wild.

•Trash Tongue Talker-

"You broke your tongue talkin trash,

Now you're trying to bring your garbage to me." Damn, that's a good line.

One of the few songs about "get the hell out of my life" that you could throw on at a party and not immediately kill the vibe.

•Hip (Eponymous) Poor Boy-

This feels like a band i grew up listening to. Wanna say Little Feat or something like that. It's...alright.

•I Guess I Should Go To Sleep-

Okay, I have a bit of a weakness for 3/4 time.

I also have the occasional fight with insomnia (and lemme tell ya, my insomnia's got HANDS), so yeah, this one hits home.

Also a fairly tidy analogy for death closing out the tab on a hard life. Not entirely sure if that was the intention, but it works.

•On And On And On-

I absolutely love the flow of this one. It's not exactly a fast song, but it keeps moving with the steady power of a river.

I actually had to relisten to it, as I got caught up in the movement and the meter of the lyrics and started spacing out and just vibing.

•Take Me With You When You Go-

The drums are straight out of Manic Depression. I'd know that goddamn drum fill *anywhere*.

I like the fiddle, it almost feels like it shouldn't work, but it really does.

Okay I wasn't expecting the intro to be "the first entire half of the song" but it kicks into 5th gear at the halfway mark and just Goes.

About what I expected going in, to be real. Some great guitar work, some weird but fun lyrics (more often than not).

I'm not sure when he and Meg had their big bad falling out back in the day, but the general sense of "being kinda angry at women" vibe on a few of the songs here definitely bring that whole debacle to mind.

Favorite Track: On And On And On. It's just a whole ass vibe.

Least Favorite Track: tie between Weep Themselves to Sleep and Hypocritical Kiss, but Blunderbuss would be up here too if the wordplay wasn't so good.

There's a lot of very divorce-coded "angry white guy" on this album, and that's just not hitting me.