#(I CAN POST THIS AS COMPILATION NOW BECAUSE I CAN)

[iamthedamndonutdrawcat]

Berlin maradures au????

now listen! berlin hipster modern marauders band au. (i'm sorry this is brutally self-indulgent and may be incomprehensible to anyone outside berlin but i need to put it somewhere) this is a long post, so i put it under the cut. please excuse the word vomit :)

they all go to a grammar school that's a bit too shitty to call itself elite but does anyway. many children of bureaucrats, diplomats etc. that think they're ghetto f.e. James, Sirius and Remus. (Peter is the only normal one tyvm)

the marauders met as classmates in year 5. Remus and Sirius are forced into the school choir. all marauders learn acoustic tradtional instruments but their "band" is actually a soundcloud rap project. James and Peter build BAD beats and Sirius fixes them. they all do enjoy indie/rock and sometimes have jam sessions and do covers. artistic duo Remus & Sirius. intense homoerotic friendship James & Sirius. wolfstar endgame. Sirius curates a spotify account with only extremely niche melancholic rap to impress Remus; actually knows german trash rap by heart. serenades Remus with Ski Aggu "love" songs during Remus' depressive phases.

Sirius and James are third generation immigrants; Sirius turkish on his mother's side, James indian. Sirius family is not necessarily evil, just conservative diplomats with a big pride in tradition & well behaviour; far removed from their own cultural & religious roots in order to integrate into german political structures. however they are homophobic/unaccepting towards Sirius. Sirius grows up in a very german environment, gets misjudged by racist teachers. extremely smart yet often lazy. at school they're permitted to use ipads and chatgpt does his entire course work; he spends his time gaming during class. vape enthusiast although he gets horrible coughing attacks.

Remus's background is very international, somewhat french on Lyall's side and arab roots on mom's side, they met in england and moved to berlin with child Remus. Rip Remus' mom. Remus & Lyall live in a nice old apartment (Altbauwohnung) in berlins Pankow district (lots of families, settled down hipsters, sligh shift into suburban terrain), Lyall is either a lawyer or diplomat, 50/50 works or spends time with his girlfriend. crunchy distant father-son-relationship. but because no ones ever home, Remus constantly has friends (and Sirius) over. Remus has BPD, is in therapy and doing pretty well in his later adolesence. Remus spends lots of time outside, drinking in parks, chilling at friends', or smokes too much weed in his room. unapologetic chain smoker, even in front of Lyall. quiet and shy, makes him seem either rude or mysterious. bookworm & music nerd. nokia + ipod combo instead of smartphone because he doesn't want screen addiction or be too reachable. vape hater, point of argument with sirius.

accidental wolfstar public outing after Sirius drunkenly performs an Ikkimel song at a party and then throws himself at Remus (they don't really gaf anymore). For Halloween they dress up as a Cigarette and a Beer (Sternburger Export).

James watches german meme compilations every night and knows them by heart. Footie enthusiast with Sirius, drags the marauders to big games where they almost get trampled. extreme alman energy (aka white german energy, upstuck, snobbish and happily embarassing, taking part in typical german shenanigans) just like Sirius, except Sirius tries to hide it and James can deal with the jokes at his expense. James was a tv addict as a child. James & Sirius friendship began over a shared interest in anime.

Peter is the token german kid. Fridays for future gave him a bad conscience and all the marauders joined him in the demonstrations to get out of class. Extreme stoner, at least bi-weekly sessions with Remus. also i like the art kid peter hc so i'm stealing it. art kid peter who draws cartoons of his friends.

Lily & Severus live in the inner city Wedding district, rougher than the outer parts where Sirius & James live. Lily & Remus bff duo. (ik this is very boy centric, i have yet to dig deeper into my headcanons for the girls)

.

i have a lot of music associations, but they actually are nice songs so idc here they are...

songs to illustrate the vibes: Nachts wach by makko, Rasenschach by Filow, FUSSBALLMÄNNER by Ikkimel, Wenn du tanzt by Von Wegen Lisbeth

Remus coded songs: Marlboro Mann by Romano, Goldener Reiter by Joachim Witt, Ziemlich Verplant by Skinny Dazed (!!!), Alt sein by Pisse

Sirius coded songs: BIKINI GRELL by Ikkimel, Immer nur da by Fynn Kliemann, Klebstoff by Mine (extreme black brother angst vibes), Findelkind by Mine (i could make a whole seperate post on how wolfstar-coded Mine's & Fynn Kliemann's discographies are)

James coded songs: Haus am See by Peter Fox, Verschwende deine Zeit by Edwin Rosen (prongsfoot vibes imo)

Peter coded songs: Alles Gute by Faber, Bongzimmer by SXTN

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

quotes from alex turner's favourite authors that make me want to put my face through a wall:

"although i have never been an actor in the strict sense of the word, i have nevertheless, in real life, always carried about with me a small folding theatre" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"there is a terrible emptiness in me, an indifference that hurts," - albert camus

"there is no trap so deadly as the trap you set for yourself" - raymond chandler

"at eight, he had once told his mother that he wanted to paint air" - vladimir nabokov

"no man ever understands quite his own artful dodges to escape from the grim shadow of self-knowledge" - joseph conrad

"everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it" - david foster wallace

"we're all lonely for something we don't know we're lonely for. how else to explain the curious feeling that goes around feeling like missing somebody we've never even met?" - david foster wallace

"i turn over a new leaf every day, but the blots show through" - keith waterhouse

"the truth will set you free. but not until it's finished with you" - david foster wallace

"curiosity is insubordination in its purest form" - vladimir nabokov

"i'm me and nobody else; and whatever people think i am or say i am, that's what i'm not, because they don't know a bloody thing about me" - alan sillitoe

"we live as we dream; alone” - joseph conrad

"i liked, as i like still, to make words look self-conscious and foolish, to bind them by mock marriage of a pun, to turn them inside out, to come upon them unwares" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"whatever you get paid attention to for is never what you think is most important about yourself" - david foster wallace

"i continued to stir my tea long after it had done all it could with the milk” - vladimir nabokov, despair

"i remained too much inside my head and ended up losing my mind" - edgar allan poe

"all the information i have about myself is from forged documents" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"how odd i can have all this inside me and to you its just words" - david foster wallace

"you will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. you will never live if you're looking for the meaning of life" - albert camus

[sleepyseals]

[Image Description: Two unfinished digital paintings / sketches of the hatchling and Hal from outer wilds. they are standing with their arms around each other and the hatchling has their head leaning on hal's shoulder as hal watches the supernova in the distance through the doorway of the museum. the first image is the scene viewed from behind with everything lit in bright blue with dark shadows. the second image shows hal's face looking in fear towards the light and is only partially colored, the rest sketched over a gray background. End Image Description.]

something you'll run back in for when the house burns down

[garthyobsessed]

I'm irrationally obsessed with Garthy O'Brien, especially their voice, so I made a compilation of literally every word they speak in FHSY and PiroL. Enjoy!

@d20fuckability

[giantkillerjack]

Uh-oh! You are like, SOOO awkward!!

You're so awkward that it is occasionally mildly uncomfortable for people!

You're so awkward that sometimes people are confused by you and then there are awkward silences!

You're so awkward ...... that ultimately no one is harmed!!

Oh damn!!! What a vile crime you have committed! What an unforgivable thing it is to make a fellow human briefly confused!

Why, if *I* were ever briefly confused and kind of uncomfortable as a result, I'd be devastated.... by the absolute net zero change in my happiness and health! - From which I might never recover!! Yes indeed! No punishment can ever be enough for you!!

So you better absolutely hate yourself for it.

Better be SO MEAN to yourself about every single missed social cue so you don't forget your horrible crime! Meaner than you'd ever dream of being to someone else for the same thing! This is YOUR responsibility!

You need to show the world that you KNOW you are bad by punishing yourself constantly! After all, think of all the people who BENEFIT from you punishing yourself! - No, really! Think about it! Think about who benefits from your pain.

Think of alllllll the definitely-good people that your definitely-necessary self-torment definitely helps! I mean, you can't just cut off their definitely-life-sustaining supply of your suffering, right?? Sure, everyone else has a breaking point, but you're probably the only person in human history who doesn't, right? Best not to question it probably. Sure, it's a symptom that billions of people with trauma have had, but who knows? You could be a one-in-seven-billion exception. Anything's possible!

Instead, better just accept that idea that bullies carry like guns in holsters - the idea that people who have trouble with social cues deserve to suffer. Better carry on the burden they placed on you until you drop. Aid the cause of the callous by enforcing shame and suffering upon yourself extra hard; try your best to do their work for them. They're very busy.

Better not recognize that you need patience and kindness to heal from your trauma. Better not find out that it was trauma rather than personal weakness filling your head with self-hating thoughts. Better not find out it wasn't your fault.

Better not find out that awkwardness is not inherently harmful or unkind, and, in fact, the people who act like it is *are the ones enacting harm and being cruel.*

Better not get righteously angry when you realize just how much unnecessary damage this has done to you. After all, if you get mad, you might realize you deserve better. You might even feel brave enough to DEMAND better! You might build boundaries that keep you safe! You might make other people think they deserve to feel safe too! And we obviously can't be having that, so...

Better not show yourself even a little kindness a little bit at a time.

Better not make a habit out of it after all that practice.

Better not get confident.

Especially if you can't first wipe out every trace of awkward. (And you probably never will. Because people who experience absolute social certainty at all times tend to be insufferable assholes that enforce the status quo. And you just don't have the stock portfolio for that.)

Better not be confident and awkward because then you might confuse and delight people

- you might accidentally end up making other people feel less shame for their social difficulties

- you might make isolated, traumatized, and shy people feel like they deserve to be included in social situations

- you might even make them feel they can be themselves around you

- you might start loving the effect you have on a room

- you might enjoy conversations more

- you might forgive yourself and bounce back from shame more easily and frequently

- you might come to enjoy some of those moments of harmless confusion you cause because NOBODY expects the Confident Awkward, and that can genuinely be an advantage in social situations

- you might stop apologizing so much.

- you might find that socializing is like a video game: it requires practice but also a safe space for it to be fun and positive.

Or if you can't become assertive and confident, better not remain awkward and shy and quiet, and then love and forgive yourself anyway!

Why, it would be carnage!!

In either scenario, you run the risk of finding out that it's not your fault that safe spaces full of kind people can be really hard to find, create, and nurture. You could end up building a skillset that helps you do those things if you're not careful!

If you start giving yourself even the tiniest amount of grace at a time, you will find that you've accessed a gateway drug with extreme long-term side effects:

- You might realize that it was never your fault that it took so long to like yourself.

- You might realize that you were always worth talking to, even when you didn't like yourself and communication felt impossibly difficult.

- You might realize that you'll still be worth talking to even if communication becomes harder as you age and/or experience disability.

- You might come to know that you deserve to be heard even on bad days when words come slow and blurry.

You might discover that you were always deserving of kindness, first and foremost from yourself.

So. As you can see, it's FAR too much of a risk to start granting your awkward self free pardons for your many heinous and harmless crimes. Better to just leave it there.

[littlefoxgw2]

[izzyizumi]

Digimon Adventure tri. ~ Kokuhaku, Movie #3 (Japanese Version) Featuring Duo/Characters/Ship: Koushiro{u} Izumi x Taichi Yagami + {Personal} Favorite Moment{s} {+of Tri}/{As a Whole} of the Adventure-related franchise

Bonus:

{Lightly extended version of [Koushiro's Slow Smile] Above}

(Unsaid) ["...to the Digital World!"}

(Because) {Not Everything Needs To Be Said 'Aloud' To Have Meaning.} (Or Be Picked Up On) Gifs by @izzyizumi / @koushirouizumi​ {Do Not Repost or Reproduce without my Permission} {Do Not Remove Caption} (Please Ask to Use)

Image usage rules + original commentary under the ‘read more’!

Happy March 6th~7th! {Original airdate of Adventure (1999) Series}

{This set was originally made for the 25th anniversary of the "Digimon" franchise!!}

{Usage of gifs may be allowed if permission is asked / or if credit is given. However, read my about & FAQ pages first. Please do NOT use / ask if you match anything in my “Do Not Interact” sections.}

{usage may be allowed IF PERMISSION IS ASKED TO USE.}

{Please also LIKE this post if you are wanting to use!} {Once you have “Liked”, feel free to contact me to ask for permission!} (You will NEED to contact me DIRECTLY in order to use!) {However, read my about & FAQ pages first. Please DO NOT use / ask if you match anything in my “Do Not Interact” section.} {I MAY POLITELY DECLINE USAGE REGARDLESS. Please do not take it personally!} {if you are unsure if you can use you can SEND ME AN ASK} {I will check your blog; if you do not match anything on my “DNI”; [CHECK THE FAQ FOR MY Do Not Interact SECTION/S] you will likely/may pass the check and can use!} {However please note my ENTIRE FAQ sections on such} {It is possible I may not grant permission for other reasons} [i.e.: You post a lot of something I have blacklisted]

[Note: Respectful replies+Tags are OK!] PLEASE ALSO NOTE: {My headcanons for the characters of this series VARY} {for this set particularly; I headcanon most as M-spec/Multi-gender attracted*} {this post/my icons ARE NOT for people who cannot respect this fact or M-spec people / M-spec headcanons / MF relationships, Queer identities, etc. in general!}

[PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL AND FOLLOW MY RULES]

[husshow]

The season is wrapping up, here's a compilation of my favorite on and (mostly) off ice clips from this season

[crossbackpoke-check]

glad to see that d3 vid made it to you as well because ohmigosh... i've watched it like 6 times already and it's still just as wild and good as the first time. like the way they all had an answer?? imagining them sitting around having conversations about who they'd like to marry on the team - not to mention the way babies were mentioned more than once. these kids are/have been on tumblr and ao3, they know what's up lol

(also side note one of the guys who said mason, he said it was bc mason was a good cuddler which sent me too - so you guys have cuddled. regularly. like WOW.) not even gonna talk about the one who picked his brother though wanting someone to do your taxes is so real

rotating "hopeless romantic + old school" in my mind, like what does that even mean?? flowers and chocolates and kissing you goodnight at your dorm room? does he pull out a chair for you before you sit down? idk, it was such a sweet and genuine answer

tldr i love them all and can we get more teams doing this please? i've never paid attention to d3 in my life but suddenly i need to know more

- @bondedpairs

every time i watch the video i just start laughing so hard, it brings me so much joy and i cannot thank kasper moregraceful enough for bringing it into all of our lives 🥺 *

AND now i get to pitch that i think everybody should watch more college/local hockey to have that type of joy all the time!!! tickets are usually pretty decently priced, you get your narratives right in front of you (my notes app has some. thoughts) and you get the same emotional attachment and watch your guys develop throughout their careers!!! a lot of the time you can find really fun social media for college teams in particularly because of student media programs but if you are not already an ahl watcher: may i recommend stalking their youtube channels. lehigh valley phantoms spelling bee videos are one of my favorite things in the entire world and the milwaukee ads have a lot of fun content too!!

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Me: I have a few FitPac ideas but I don't think I've written that much.

The document:

[mollypaup]

looking for old fandom stuff really does make you feel like a cyberstalker

[tanieny]

You know That One Video that shows up in your recommended?

That One Video did appear on my recommended. Unfortunately for my sanity for the foreseeable future, I was reloading my page when I saw that. Now I live in paranioa gazing longingly at my youtube recomended hoping for That One Video

[todayisafridaynight]

ok yea but don't forget about what daigo did in yakuza 4. how could he throw away his most valuable officer like that? he made such terrible decisions there. he was not a good choice and kiryu should have known better. (i am not prev anon btw but i do agree with them)

i didnt forget: i make fun of him every other day for it actually. His Widow Era, i dub it

but in all seriousness i never said daigo was perfect or the "perfect choice"- every time i defend him i emphasize that he isn't perfect and more or less joke about yayoi being chairwoman. but i don't intend to make him seem perfect- i just want to say he's not totally helpless and he didn't run the tojo into the ground like people seem to believe. daigo making one fuck up that got resolved in a week isn't fair enough grounds to brand him a failure for his twelve years of service

plus, who else was kiryu supposed to choose? we already went over how kashiwagi isn't the kind of man to lead people- guide, sure- but not lead. and majima surely didn't want to lead the tojo, he hardly even wanted to be there. kiryu made it clear his options were exhausted and anyone but daigo would be an irresponsible choice (and that was made evident with the likes of shindo running around). again, it was a gamble, and luckily daigo managed to work things out despite his inexperience and hasty inauguration

BUT this ask has inspired me to make a general timeline of daigo's career complete with W's, L's, and things totally out of his control so we can all come to our own conclusions on whether he was cringe fail or not

text version below, left to right:

(Post-Y2) Daigo's Inauguration - January, 2007

Peace Period - January 2007 to March 2009 (2 years, 2 months)

(Y3) Daigo is shot in an attempt to protect Kazuma Kiryu's land - March, 2009

Peace Period - March 2009 to March 2010 (1 year)

(Y4) Daigo is cornered by Isao Katsuragi and the police - March 2010

Peace Period - March 2010 to December 2012 (2 years, 9 months)

(Y5) Daigo slips from the Tojo to visit Tatsuo Shinada and causes a potential rift between the Tojo and the Yamagasa family - December, 2012

(Post-Y5) Daigo resolves the tension between the Yamagasa family and the Tojo Clan - December, 2012

Peace Period - December 2012 to 2015 (3 years)

(Pre-Y6) Daigo, alongside Goro Majima, are framed and arrested for the fire in Little Asia - 2015 to January 2017 (~2 years)

(Post-Y6) Daigo and co. are released from prison, deciding not to get revenge for Kiryu's sake - January, 2017

Peace Period - January 2017 to Late 2017 (~1 year)

(Pre-Y7) The Tojo Clan is pushed out of Kamurocho as a part f the Kamurocho 3K Plan (Late 2017)

Daigo, Saejima, and Majima are forced into hiding - Late 2017 to Mid 2019 (~2 years)

(Y7) Daigo and Masaru Watase put an end to the yakuza and go legit as a security company - Mid 2019

[tezzbot]

Aurrgh that doubt in my artistic and creative ability is worming its way back into my head RRGHGHH

[im-still-watching-anime]

i have been So Busy and my brain desperately begging me to rewatch all my silly little sports animes when i’m trying to focus is really not it

[koushirouizumi]

{Reference}/{Starting Master-list} - Donor Children History in Japan

(Gathered by me for reference; It's been a while since I researched this, but maybe you'll become Informed by following these {and I do plan to search around again}...)

Also re-blogging for my own reference since I'm, you know, a Donor child, and wanting to research more about how the laws surround such in other countries, including for the series I create fan works for.

(Some of the language may lean slightly bionormative in the reporting, so it is important to keep this in mind. Please note I am compiling these for my own reference, too.)

Children born through Artificial Insemination Speak Up {2003} "The Ministry of Health reports that {Donor children} births have been reported since the mid-seventies in Japan. While statistics record about 10,000 such children, the numbers could be much higher."

"There is no correct record on the number of AID children {Donor children, etc} as laws now do not stipulate that parents and doctors record such births. We contend the actual numbers could be between 100 to 200 a year," says Tomoko Kashiwage, a director in the infertility section at the ministry.

(...) Experts are now supporting the passage of a law in 2004 that would allow children above 15 years the right to the disclosure of personal details of donors of sperm and eggs in their birth.

(Yuri Hibino) Attitudes towards Disclosure of Children’s Genetic Origins among Japanese Patients Using Assisted Reproductive Technology {2014} (PDF) Keyword: Donor conception; Right to know; Infertile patients; Japan "In Japan, a 2003 government report recognized the right of children born via donor-assisted conception to know about their genetic origin, including identifying information about the donor [2]. However, this right has {not} been enacted into law(...)"

first, woman gives birth using egg from anonymous donor {2017 Mar}

"(...) Although there have been earlier cases of children conceived using a husband’s sperm and eggs donated by sisters or friends"...

{Tradition} denies Surrogacy {2017 May};

"Most major media covered the March 22 Tokyo news conference where Sachiko Kishimoto of the nonprofit organization Oocyte Donation Network (OD-Net) explained how a woman in her 40s had recently given birth to a daughter who had been conceived using the woman’s husband’s sperm and an egg from a third party. Though there have been instances in Japan of women giving birth by using the eggs of friends or relatives, this was the first publicized case in Japan of a baby successfully coming to term with the help of an anonymous egg donor."

"(...) there are no laws governing infertility treatments using donated eggs from third parties"...

"Japan tops the world in the number of women who undergo infertility treatment, while at the same time it also has the lowest success rate." (...)