#(' WHY DIDN'T YOU INCLUDE 02 FROM THE START ')

[moonpetrichors-blog]

hiii! i love ur avatar writing and i was wondering if u could write something about neteyam x reader, where they're childhood best friends but then some na'vi guy start to show interest in the reader and neteyam gets all jealous and realize than maybe he's in love with them? idk if this make sense, english is not my first language, sorry :((

All Mine

Tags: Neteyam x Omaticaya!Reader, Aonung x Omaticaya!Reader (Only Slight), Fem!Reader, Childhood Friend Romance, Friends To Lovers, Jealousy, Anguished Declarations Of Love, Neteyam Loses His Cool For Once

Warnings: Neteyam Daydreaming About Punching Aonung LMAO

Neteyam was walking along the beach with his siblings when he spotted you, talking to the Olo'eyktan’s son. It had never crossed his mind before that you, his childhood best friend, would eventually find someone to romantically pursue. Was it wrong to realize he wanted you to himself, and not in the arms of another boy?

OMG IM SO OBSESSED W THIS IDEA!!! If theres one trope I love, its a jealous love interest 🤭 also, trust me when I say ur English is perfect!! Fun fact but English is also my second language and growing up I was ass at speaking it LMFAO so ur not alone 😭☠️

Yellow Hyacinth - Jealousy

* ˚ ✦ 1663 Words • Read below the cut

╭┈─────── ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-╰┈➤ ❝ [02/01/23] ❞  

It had been roughly a week since you arrived on the Awa'atlu village's shoreline. When you initially arrived, the Olo'eyktan's son harassed you relentlessly.

There were many things he liked to call you. Freak, weirdo, dimwit, you name it.

There was nothing freak-like about you, per se, but the fact that you were from the forest made you a target to Aonung's bullying. What skills could a woodland girl teach sea people? It was dreadful that you had to hide among them in the first place.

Technically, you had no obligation to go into hiding with the Metkayina clan, but you felt as if the Omaticaya had nothing left for you when your childhood best friend, Neteyam, informed you that he and his family needed to flee.

When Neteyam initially told you that he had to abandon your clan, including you, you wailed into his arms as if he had just perished. You couldn't bear the thought of not being with Neteyam, even if it meant compromising your clan's safety.

The truth is, you overreacted so harshly because you’ve had feelings for Neteyam for years now. You’ve always been unsure if he reciprocated, but there were moments between the both of you where he’d send mixed signals; you didn’t know what shifted or when, but there was just something between you both that felt like you were more than just friends.

And now he wouldn’t be able to stay and see how your relationship would unfurl.

Maybe you were foolish to persuade Jake Sully into bringing you along, but he eventually agreed (albeit reluctantly), since you and his son made each other happy. Neteyam was pleased when you told him you were departing with him.

So there you were, well acquainted with the Metkayina, and accompanied by your dearest friend. Aside from Aonung's pestering, you could put up with it since you knew Neteyam would safeguard you.

However, the more time that you spent with the sea people, the more you began to suspect that it was only you who had detected something between you and Neteyam. You stopped sending hints, even if he overlooked them unintentionally, as it stung too much to persevere.

Aonung eventually stopped attempting to harass you, and you even developed a pleasant friendship with him. Tonowari, his father, had him apologize for his poor behavior; after that, he was actually fairly delightful to converse with.

This was your life now.

...

Neteyam sauntered along the coast, followed by Kiri and Lo'ak. He couldn't take his mind off you; were you safe? Was Aonung bothering you yet again? His father had chided him that he didn't need to be at your side all hours of the day, but he didn't quite understand why his father was amused when he talked about how Neteyam behaved with you. You were his best friend, of course he’s worried!

Regardless, Jake instructed him to keep an eye on his siblings, so he didn't have much of a choice in abandoning them and running to your rescue. Not with Lo'ak prowling behind him in search of trouble.

Neteyam maintained his walk, thinking to himself that he was exceedingly fortunate that you had left the clan for him, and although he wouldn't say it, he was overjoyed.

What he wasn't so thrilled with was how he'd discovered you'd grown closer to that jackass Aonung. You could talk to anybody you pleased, and he knew you were far too pure-hearted to entirely dismiss the Olo'eyktan's son, but why did he feel so bitter whenever he saw you together?

Speak of the devil.

Kiri pointed you out, but when she saw who you were with, she shuddered. “Look, it’s Y/N! And... Aonung.” She deadpanned.

Neteyam was paying little heed to what his sister was saying. No, he was paying close attention to how you were giggling at whatever Aonung said.

What the fuck?

Lo’ak nudged his shoulder. “Bro?”

Lo'ak waved his hand in front of Neteyam's face, which he instantly swept aside. What exactly did Aonung say to make you laugh that hard? You only laugh when you're with him!

Neteyam was practically seething, his fists clenched into balls, as Kiri and Lo'ak snickered to each other out of his earshot. If Kiri didn't know any better, she'd suppose Neteyam was thinking about the finest ways to strangle a (what might as well be) merman.

And truly, he was.

Lo’ak held his fist to his mouth to stifle his laughs. “Dude, are you jealous?”

Kiri placed a hand on Lo’ak’s shoulder, and looked away with a smile plastered to her face. “He totally is.”

Neteyam’s rage was now being directed towards his siblings. “What? No I’m not! Why would I be jealous?”

Lo’ak was still chortling when he pointed behind Neteyam, motioning that he should probably look. He turned around indignantly, and saw that Aonung had a hand on your arm. He was close. Too close for his liking.

And that look. Anyone could see that Aonung was flirting with you. He was maintaining direct eye contact with you, narrowing his gaze. He appeared to be listening carefully to what you were saying, but his smirk paired with his eyes passing over your lips indicated otherwise.

Neteyam just wanted to pummel his stupid, blue face in.

Kiri and Lo'ak burst out laughing as they witnessed Neteyam storm over to where the two of you were. He aggressively inserted his own hand where Aonung's own had originally been, shoving your body into his own by the shoulder. The unexpected intrusion caught you off guard.

“Oh! Neteyam!”

You beamed at his arrival right away, but Aonung frowned. Before you could enquire what Neteyam was doing, he stared daggers into Aonung's head, and hauled you away from him by your bicep. Aonung remained there stunned, staring at your back as you walked away.

“What the hell?”

Kiri and Lo'ak tripped over themselves on their way over to Aonung, howling with laughter, and Lo'ak smacked his shoulder in amusement.

“Sorry cuz, you never stood a chance!”

Aonung’s cheeks darkened deeply. He was thoroughly mortified; he had no idea you were and Neteyam were like that! (You’re not.)

...

Neteyam began to lose confidence throughout the walk once he had pulled you much further away. While you shouted at him to let you go, he inwardly cursed at himself, wondering why he had just done that.

Does he like you?

Your vehement protests about how Neteyam was causing you pain eventually ceased falling on deaf ears. His rage vanished when he realized he'd been treating you like a ragdoll for the entire walk, and he immediately felt horrible. He let go of your arm and buried his face in his hands, ashamed that he had done such a thing to you in the first place.

You rubbed your sore arm, and nudged his shoulder gently. “What’s wrong?”

He looked way too upset, and you rarely saw him like this, if ever.

“Why was Aonung looking at you like that?”

That struck you with irritation. “Are you serious? That’s what this is about?”

His eyes darkened at your words. How could it not be?

You started to raise your voice. “You cannot be for real. You’re just my friend, why are you being so overprotective? If Aonung likes me, that’s my business! Not yours!”

Neteyam snatched your wrist again, evidently upset by what you just uttered. He didn’t know what he was saying anymore. “The only person that can look at you like that is me!”

You went quiet for a time, then realization dawned on your features. “Hold up... do you like me?”

Suddenly, Neteyam’s gaze softened, and he could no longer be furious with you. “How could I not?”

He released your wrist, unsure of what to say next. When he noticed your prolonged silence, Neteyam whirled around, prepared to walk back to his home and cry his frustrations out. He was fighting back tears already; what was the point of telling you this anyway?

You gripped his shoulder and forced him to swivel around and face you. Neteyam could not cover his face, and he felt humiliated because he didn't know why he was acting in this manner. Why was he weeping over a silly look?

He was caught by surprise when you cupped his face in your hands, and wiped the stray tears away. Your irritation had completely dissipated. “You have nothing to be worried about.”

He sniffled. “Why?”

“Because I’ve liked you since forever, but I didn’t think you liked me back. There were so many mixed signals, and you never picked up on my hints, either!”

Neteyam was taken aback. He was at a loss for words.

You rolled your eyes. “Just kiss me, you big idiot.”

Your hand that was on his shoulder was now suddenly imprisoned in his grip, and he jerked you towards his body, lips crashing into yours. He pressed against you with ardor, as if you'd vanish if he didn't embrace you like you were the last Na'vi on Pandora.

Your nimble fingers found purchase in his braids. His hands slithered around your waist, drawing you flush against him, effectively deepening the kiss. He needed you so near that he could only sense your lips against his. When you would try and pull away, his desperate kisses would follow.

You feared Neteyam had forgotten you needed to breathe, because you had to roughly pull his head back by his braids to eventually get him to halt his feverish actions. The minimal bit of pigment on your lips had now smeared, a mark left by Neteyam that claimed you as his. Who the hell taught him to kiss like that?

As you both merely stared at each other, stunned, Neteyam spoke through labored breaths. “All mine?”

“I’m all yours.”

Bonus!

Lo'ak sipped his fruity iced drink, having witnessed the entire exchange from a distance. He patted Aonung's back.

“You wish that was you, huh?”

Aonung punched him.

[vidavalor]

Perfectly Safe

Ok, I might have read one too many 'Aziraphale doesn't love Crowley because he wants him to be an angel'-type posts and I'm at risk of grinding my teeth into oblivion over here. This is short defense of why Aziraphale is tempted by the idea of being able to offer Crowley a way out of Hell and how that makes him pretty lovely, actually, and not villainous in any way.

In honor of @badaziraphaletakes, who is doing The Lord's Work out here. Lemme know how I did when you have a chance. 😇

Aziraphale being tempted by "The Metatron's" offer is not about him needing Crowley to be an angel. It's about the hell that Crowley has been living being tied to Hell for the last six thousand plus years.

Aziraphale does not need Crowley to become an angel again to love him. He already loves him. He does not think that Crowley is "lesser" because he's a demon. That's lunacy. Aziraphale is furious with God, whom he thinks made a mistake in casting Crowley to Hell because Crowley is lovely and Aziraphale thinks nothing less. Aziraphale loves Crowley so much that he actually just willingly accepted a scheme he didn't really 100% believe was true just because even if there was a .02% chance that it was real, he had to take it.

Aziraphale is tempted... quite. literally. tempted... into accepting an offer that includes the power to restore Crowley's angelic status because he believes that Crowley becoming an angel again is the only way that Crowley would ever be safe from Satan and Aziraphale will do anything to keep him safe.

Anything.

That angel will give up their life together on Earth. He will give up his own freedom and his own happiness and, largely, he and Crowley's ability to have a functioning relationship, to do the worst job imaginable for all of eternity if doing that job means that it gives him the power to protect Crowley in the one way for which he has always been powerless.

What do you think it's done to Aziraphale for it to have always been dangerous for them to be together all this time? Not just in the sense that they can't get caught or they could be killed but in the sense that because they can't get caught or they could be killed, they can't just live together easily and that actually would only partially solve the problem? Every time Crowley goes out the door, neither of them know what horrors await him on the outside.

Every. Single. Time. For thousands of years...

Aziraphale has always done everything he could to protect Crowley, as best as he could in whatever time they were in. He built the bookshop for Crowley. Yes, he wanted a place of his own and he came up with the bookshop embassy to con Heaven into letting him have material objects and a house but it was always really for both of them. It was to give Crowley a place to which he could escape from Hell. It was so that there was one place where demons and Satan couldn't find him because, out there in the world? Even in the places where Crowley was living? Crowley has never been safe from them.

One of the first scenes of Crowley in the series is him being attacked by Satan--while driving his car, a symbol of autonomy and control over himself-- while he was supposed to be having dinner with Aziraphale. This is basically the intro summary of their relationship that we are given at the start of the story and that carries through the rest of it in different scenes. If you were Aziraphale by 2.06 and thousand years deep into this hell you and Crowley had been living together, wouldn't you sign on the dotted line for even the slimmest-as-all-fuck, hope-and-a-prayer chance that you might be able to get the kind of power that could stop the love of your life from potentially being stalked, tormented, threatened or attacked any time he wasn't near you?

Imagine being head-over-heels in love with a person who is your best friend and your lover and your partner in life and he's safe with you, of course, but you can't be together all of the time because being together at all is risky and could kill you if you get caught but when he's not with you? He could be being raped on the side of the road by the literal fucking Devil because that's actually canonically happened before. What do you think it did to Aziraphale to feel like he was powerless to protect the person he loves for so long?

In Aziraphale's mind, he's been able to do little more than watch as Crowley suffered with no way to stop it.

Until the offer from "The Metatron":

Then, along comes a situation that seems way too good to be true-- and is. That it is, though, doesn't matter to Aziraphale much at this point. It's not remotely ideal and it's not on their terms but it's something... it's more than Aziraphale felt he had to offer Crowley before he was given it.

Aziraphale does not want power for power's sake; he doesn't want to run Heaven. He rejected that when it was all that was offered.

What tempted him was the power to protect Crowley.

It doesn't matter how unlikely it is that this is a genuine offer-- and Aziraphale does have doubts that it is genuine. This is the only offer that Aziraphale cannot refuse. He will never reject the possibility of freeing his partner from literal Hell because it would be freeing him from the mental, physical and emotional hell he's been going through for thousands of years.

That is how much Aziraphale loves Crowley.

How does Aziraphale fall? Well, Mr. Fell really actually fell long ago because he fell in love. He falls to Hell, though, when he cannot resist the temptation to take for himself the kind of power that he thinks would protect Crowley. He's tempted by the very devil that has been torturing them both and, worse, he knows he probably was, but it's still an offer he cannot ever refuse.

Aziraphale doesn't want Crowley to become an angel again because he can't love him if he's a demon; he wants Crowley to be an angel again because then he'd be safe from Satan. Then, he'd have a chance to heal more and be free. It's Aziraphale's unconditional love for Crowley that leads him to fall.

I think Aziraphale feels like he has nothing to offer Crowley if he can't protect him more than he already does. He has a lot of pain, anger and shame over a situation that isn't really within his control and that he'd kill to fix. No amount of Crowley's reassurance over the years has been able to fundamentally change how Aziraphale feels about this because both of them already do everything in their power to manage the situation as best as they can and, throughout all of this time, there has not ever been any way to fundamentally change it.

Don't think this angel hasn't thought long and hard about how he wants to marry that demon but he's not sure how he'd ever stand there and take a vow because, in his mind, a failure to protect him would be to break that vow. He doesn't actually think he's a good enough partner to Crowley as it is, let alone the husband to him he'd love to be. (Crowley very much begs to differ on that.)

That angel who gives his flaming sword and his money and time and his love to any being that needs what he can give them? The one that took Gabriel in and comforted Muriel and saved Job and Sitis' kids and gave Elspeth and Maggie a way out of despair?

That same angel has spent millennia unable to save his beloved partner from the worst horrors imaginable and that's how The Devil got this kind, pure-of-heart person-- the anger, shame, frustration and pain over thousands of years of telling himself that he's not good in general and he's definitely not good enough for Crowley.

Go right ahead and make him the bad guy if you want but know that his own negative thoughts about himself will out do yours any day of the week and twice on Sundays.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Demon-haunted computers are back, baby

Catch me in Miami! I'll be at Books and Books in Coral Gables on Jan 22 at 8PM.

As a science fiction writer, I am professionally irritated by a lot of sf movies. Not only do those writers get paid a lot more than I do, they insist on including things like "self-destruct" buttons on the bridges of their starships.

Look, I get it. When the evil empire is closing in on your flagship with its secret transdimensional technology, it's important that you keep those secrets out of the emperor's hand. An irrevocable self-destruct switch there on the bridge gets the job done! (It has to be irrevocable, otherwise the baddies'll just swarm the bridge and toggle it off).

But c'mon. If there's a facility built into your spaceship that causes it to explode no matter what the people on the bridge do, that is also a pretty big security risk! What if the bad guy figures out how to hijack the measure that – by design – the people who depend on the spaceship as a matter of life and death can't detect or override?

I mean, sure, you can try to simplify that self-destruct system to make it easier to audit and assure yourself that it doesn't have any bugs in it, but remember Schneier's Law: anyone can design a security system that works so well that they themselves can't think of a flaw in it. That doesn't mean you've made a security system that works – only that you've made a security system that works on people stupider than you.

I know it's weird to be worried about realism in movies that pretend we will ever find a practical means to visit other star systems and shuttle back and forth between them (which we are very, very unlikely to do):

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/09/astrobezzle/#send-robots-instead

But this kind of foolishness galls me. It galls me even more when it happens in the real world of technology design, which is why I've spent the past quarter-century being very cross about Digital Rights Management in general, and trusted computing in particular.

It all starts in 2002, when a team from Microsoft visited our offices at EFF to tell us about this new thing they'd dreamed up called "trusted computing":

https://pluralistic.net/2020/12/05/trusting-trust/#thompsons-devil

The big idea was to stick a second computer inside your computer, a very secure little co-processor, that you couldn't access directly, let alone reprogram or interfere with. As far as this "trusted platform module" was concerned, you were the enemy. The "trust" in trusted computing was about other people being able to trust your computer, even if they didn't trust you.

So that little TPM would do all kinds of cute tricks. It could observe and produce a cryptographically signed manifest of the entire boot-chain of your computer, which was meant to be an unforgeable certificate attesting to which kind of computer you were running and what software you were running on it. That meant that programs on other computers could decide whether to talk to your computer based on whether they agreed with your choices about which code to run.

This process, called "remote attestation," is generally billed as a way to identify and block computers that have been compromised by malware, or to identify gamers who are running cheats and refuse to play with them. But inevitably it turns into a way to refuse service to computers that have privacy blockers turned on, or are running stream-ripping software, or whose owners are blocking ads:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/02/self-incrimination/#wei-bai-bai

After all, a system that treats the device's owner as an adversary is a natural ally for the owner's other, human adversaries. The rubric for treating the owner as an adversary focuses on the way that users can be fooled by bad people with bad programs. If your computer gets taken over by malicious software, that malware might intercept queries from your antivirus program and send it false data that lulls it into thinking your computer is fine, even as your private data is being plundered and your system is being used to launch malware attacks on others.

These separate, non-user-accessible, non-updateable secure systems serve a nubs of certainty, a remote fortress that observes and faithfully reports on the interior workings of your computer. This separate system can't be user-modifiable or field-updateable, because then malicious software could impersonate the user and disable the security chip.

It's true that compromised computers are a real and terrifying problem. Your computer is privy to your most intimate secrets and an attacker who can turn it against you can harm you in untold ways. But the widespread redesign of out computers to treat us as their enemies gives rise to a range of completely predictable and – I would argue – even worse harms. Building computers that treat their owners as untrusted parties is a system that works well, but fails badly.

First of all, there are the ways that trusted computing is designed to hurt you. The most reliable way to enshittify something is to supply it over a computer that runs programs you can't alter, and that rats you out to third parties if you run counter-programs that disenshittify the service you're using. That's how we get inkjet printers that refuse to use perfectly good third-party ink and cars that refuse to accept perfectly good engine repairs if they are performed by third-party mechanics:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/24/rent-to-pwn/#kitt-is-a-demon

It's how we get cursed devices and appliances, from the juicer that won't squeeze third-party juice to the insulin pump that won't connect to a third-party continuous glucose monitor:

https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/

But trusted computing doesn't just create an opaque veil between your computer and the programs you use to inspect and control it. Trusted computing creates a no-go zone where programs can change their behavior based on whether they think they're being observed.

The most prominent example of this is Dieselgate, where auto manufacturers murdered hundreds of people by gimmicking their cars to emit illegal amount of NOX. Key to Dieselgate was a program that sought to determine whether it was being observed by regulators (it checked for the telltale signs of the standard test-suite) and changed its behavior to color within the lines.

Software that is seeking to harm the owner of the device that's running it must be able to detect when it is being run inside a simulation, a test-suite, a virtual machine, or any other hallucinatory virtual world. Just as Descartes couldn't know whether anything was real until he assured himself that he could trust his senses, malware is always questing to discover whether it is running in the real universe, or in a simulation created by a wicked god:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/28/descartes-was-an-optimist/#uh-oh

That's why mobile malware uses clever gambits like periodically checking for readings from your device's accelerometer, on the theory that a virtual mobile phone running on a security researcher's test bench won't have the fidelity to generate plausible jiggles to match the real data that comes from a phone in your pocket:

https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2019/01/google-play-malware-used-phones-motion-sensors-to-conceal-itself/

Sometimes this backfires in absolutely delightful ways. When the Wannacry ransomware was holding the world hostage, the security researcher Marcus Hutchins noticed that its code made reference to a very weird website: iuqerfsodp9ifjaposdfjhgosurijfaewrwergwea.com. Hutchins stood up a website at that address and every Wannacry-infection in the world went instantly dormant:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/10/flintstone-delano-roosevelt/#the-matrix

It turns out that Wannacry's authors were using that ferkakte URL the same way that mobile malware authors were using accelerometer readings – to fulfill Descartes' imperative to distinguish the Matrix from reality. The malware authors knew that security researchers often ran malicious code inside sandboxes that answered every network query with fake data in hopes of eliciting responses that could be analyzed for weaknesses. So the Wannacry worm would periodically poll this nonexistent website and, if it got an answer, it would assume that it was being monitored by a security researcher and it would retreat to an encrypted blob, ceasing to operate lest it give intelligence to the enemy. When Hutchins put a webserver up at iuqerfsodp9ifjaposdfjhgosurijfaewrwergwea.com, every Wannacry instance in the world was instantly convinced that it was running on an enemy's simulator and withdrew into sulky hibernation.

The arms race to distinguish simulation from reality is critical and the stakes only get higher by the day. Malware abounds, even as our devices grow more intimately woven through our lives. We put our bodies into computers – cars, buildings – and computers inside our bodies. We absolutely want our computers to be able to faithfully convey what's going on inside them.

But we keep running as hard as we can in the opposite direction, leaning harder into secure computing models built on subsystems in our computers that treat us as the threat. Take UEFI, the ubiquitous security system that observes your computer's boot process, halting it if it sees something it doesn't approve of. On the one hand, this has made installing GNU/Linux and other alternative OSes vastly harder across a wide variety of devices. This means that when a vendor end-of-lifes a gadget, no one can make an alternative OS for it, so off the landfill it goes.

It doesn't help that UEFI – and other trusted computing modules – are covered by Section 1201 of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), which makes it a felony to publish information that can bypass or weaken the system. The threat of a five-year prison sentence and a $500,000 fine means that UEFI and other trusted computing systems are understudied, leaving them festering with longstanding bugs:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/09/free-sample/#que-viva

Here's where it gets really bad. If an attacker can get inside UEFI, they can run malicious software that – by design – no program running on our computers can detect or block. That badware is running in "Ring -1" – a zone of privilege that overrides the operating system itself.

Here's the bad news: UEFI malware has already been detected in the wild:

https://securelist.com/cosmicstrand-uefi-firmware-rootkit/106973/

And here's the worst news: researchers have just identified another exploitable UEFI bug, dubbed Pixiefail:

https://blog.quarkslab.com/pixiefail-nine-vulnerabilities-in-tianocores-edk-ii-ipv6-network-stack.html

Writing in Ars Technica, Dan Goodin breaks down Pixiefail, describing how anyone on the same LAN as a vulnerable computer can infect its firmware:

https://arstechnica.com/security/2024/01/new-uefi-vulnerabilities-send-firmware-devs-across-an-entire-ecosystem-scrambling/

That vulnerability extends to computers in a data-center where the attacker has a cloud computing instance. PXE – the system that Pixiefail attacks – isn't widely used in home or office environments, but it's very common in data-centers.

Again, once a computer is exploited with Pixiefail, software running on that computer can't detect or delete the Pixiefail code. When the compromised computer is queried by the operating system, Pixiefail undetectably lies to the OS. "Hey, OS, does this drive have a file called 'pixiefail?'" "Nope." "Hey, OS, are you running a process called 'pixiefail?'" "Nope."

This is a self-destruct switch that's been compromised by the enemy, and which no one on the bridge can de-activate – by design. It's not the first time this has happened, and it won't be the last.

There are models for helping your computer bust out of the Matrix. Back in 2016, Edward Snowden and bunnie Huang prototyped and published source code and schematics for an "introspection engine":

https://assets.pubpub.org/aacpjrja/AgainstTheLaw-CounteringLawfulAbusesofDigitalSurveillance.pdf

This is a single-board computer that lives in an ultraslim shim that you slide between your iPhone's mainboard and its case, leaving a ribbon cable poking out of the SIM slot. This connects to a case that has its own OLED display. The board has leads that physically contact each of the network interfaces on the phone, conveying any data they transit to the screen so that you can observe the data your phone is sending without having to trust your phone.

(I liked this gadget so much that I included it as a major plot point in my 2020 novel Attack Surface, the third book in the Little Brother series):

https://craphound.com/attacksurface/

We don't have to cede control over our devices in order to secure them. Indeed, we can't ever secure them unless we can control them. Self-destruct switches don't belong on the bridge of your spaceship, and trusted computing modules don't belong in your devices.

I'm Kickstarting the audiobook for The Bezzle, the sequel to Red Team Blues, narrated by @wilwheaton! You can pre-order the audiobook and ebook, DRM free, as well as the hardcover, signed or unsigned. There's also bundles with Red Team Blues in ebook, audio or paperback.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/17/descartes-delenda-est/#self-destruct-sequence-initiated

Image: Mike (modified) https://www.flickr.com/photos/stillwellmike/15676883261/

CC BY-SA 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/

[likeadevils]

1989 Timeline

This is a very long post that puts all the songs on 1989 in order of Taylor creating them. I’ve also included a few other songs she worked on while writing 1989 and quotes from Taylor and her collaborators talking about her process

Of all the albums in Taylor's discography, I think this is the one that improves the most when you listen to it in order. All of those things Taylor was talking about in the promo for this album-- how this is an album of her coming into her own, figuring out her values, learning to stand on her own two feet-- it all clicks into place. Listening to it in order has made me cry on more than one occasion, and it's also the thing that made me start this whole crazy process of figuring out the dates she wrote each song.

If you don't want to read the whole post, check out this playlist of the album in order or this playlist of her entire discography.

I’ve also added this color coded scale of how sure I am of the date: 

Confirmed: There is some type of official source for the date

Inferring: Nobody has officially said “This is when we wrote it,” but all available evidence points to that date

Speculation: This date is based on guesswork and is highly likely to change, or, all that is known is the general season.

Unknown: All that is known is the year (from the US Copyright Offices)

Without further ado...

Oct 6, 2012: Taylor seems to have been in a studio in London (Note: I have no idea where this photo comes from and I can not find a place that specifies if this is a music studio or radio interview.)

This Love: Oct 17, 2012 (Confirmed)

October 19, 2012: Taylor mentions wanting to work with Imogen Heap, prompting Imogen to get in touch with Taylor

Time Interview: Who’d be your dream collaboration, especially now that you’re taking more musical risks? Let me think. Imogen Heap! She’s amazing. Taylor: Someone asked me in an interview "Who would you like to work with?" and I said Imogen Heap. I get an email to my management, sent like "Imogen just saw that Taylor just said an interview that she would like to work together" She said "Why don't you come out to my studio." Imogen: I got a phone call [in 2014] saying Taylor Swift was in London, she'd love to work with me and the only date she could do (between 4 sold out 02 arenas!) was the day after we got back, Sunday. It was both unexpected and not at the same time as I'd heard Taylor was a fan a while back via this Time magazine piece but somehow didn't think it would actually happen.

Fall 2012: Taylor possibly writes a song with Harry Styles and Jacknife Lee (her producer for The Last Time).

Jacknife Lee: “It was out of my field of expertise and interest, but I was intrigued and my girls were thrilled. Taylor was nice and very professional. She knew what she wanted and there was no fucking about. She was seeing Harry Styles at the time, so he came to Topanga on her recommendation. She wrote a few songs with him, and it was the same thing – quick. But this time it was more directed by the management and label. They were after something specific. I wanted more acoustic and gentle, almost Americana, and they wanted bombast. They got what they wanted, and that was the extent of my foray into teen-pop territory. It was fun.”

All You Had to Do Was Stay: Jan 10, 2013 (Confirmed)

Taylor is photographed outside Conway, and then tweets "Back in the studio. Uh oh..." Later, Taylor confirmed that she was recording All You Had To Do Was Stay. Taylor: I had a dream that my ex showed up at my door, knocked at my door, and I opened it up, and I was about ready to launch into the perfect thing to say [...], Instead, all that would come out of my mouth was that high-pitched chorus of people singing, 'Stay!'...and then you go to say something else, and it's just like 'Stay! Stay! Stay!' And I woke up, I was like 'Oh, that was mortifying. But that's kind of a cool vocal part.'

January 11, 2013: Taylor is photographed outside Conway again

How You Get The Girl: Jan 15, 2013 (Confirmed)

Taylor posts a picture of her playing a guitar in the studio, captioned "Somewhere in LA..". Later, Taylor confirmed that she was recording How You Get The Girl. Given what was going on in her personal life, she likely wrote this sometime in the fall/winter of 2012, but all we know for sure is the date she recorded it.

February 9, 2013: Tweets "Grammy rehearsals last night, studio today, who knows what tonight holds! (I do. Laying around watching TV and eating candy.)"

March 6, 2013: Taylor is photographed outside a studio in LA

March 23, 2013: Posts a picture of her playing guitar captioned "Pre show. Columbia, South Carolina"

I Wish You Would: May 28, 2013 (Inferring)

Taylor is photographed out for lunch in Rhode Island with Lena Dunham and Jack Antonoff on May 27, before leaving for her show in Phoenix, Arizona the next day Taylor: "Max Martin and [Karl Johan] Shellback [Schuster] were the last people I collaborated with on [2012 album] Red, and I wished we could have done more and explored more. So going into this album, I knew that I wanted to start with them again. Then I thought, “Wouldn’t it be amazing to work with Ryan Tedder?” And then I was with Jack Antonoff and Lena Dunham at the beach, and we started talking about our favorite ’80s music. All of this started happening organically, and I found myself gravitating toward pop sensibilities, pop hooks, pop production styles." Jack:  "We were hanging out at her house in Rhode Island and we were talking about John Hughes movies, and a lot of the music that inspired [them], and just this general culture of sound in that time period that was really larger-than-life in an anthemic, positive way. These songs could be at the end of films that were really, really beautiful and said a lot. That actually ended up being a song called 'I Wish You Would' which is going to be on her album. We first worked on that song together and realized we kind of have a good thing. Taylor: “This is a song I did with Jack Antonoff, and Jack is one of my friends and so we were hanging out and he pulled out his phone and goes "I made this amazing track the other day. It's so cool, I love these guitar sounds." And he played it for me and immediately I could hear this finished song in my head, and I just said "Please, please let me have that. Let me play with it, like send it to me" And so he sent it to me and I was on tour and this was me playing the track on my laptop recording me singing the vocal into my phone and it ended up being a song called "I Wish You Would", because Jack wrote back and said "I love that".”

June 7, 2013: At the CMA fest, Taylor is asked if she's started writing for her next album yet

“It's starting, all the anxiety is starting and when the anxiety starts, then the writing happens right afterward, usually. Um, so, yeah, I basically... I like to, I like to write for about two years before I'm finished with an album because I... at this point I kind of know that whenever I write in the first year is going to get thrown away, because, I'm going to like it, but it's going to sound a little bit like the last project I had, and the second year usually ends up sounding like the next project. So I think at this point, at this point I feel like staying the same is the easy way to go but it's not the way that I want to go, creatively. I think you need to challenge yourself, I think you need to change up your influences, I think you need to be inspired by different things that you've been inspired by before, and, uh, y'know, It's harder to call people you don't know, and it's harder to think of topics you haven't covered and think of new ways to say old emotions that everyone feels, but, that's the goal at this point."

June 20-21, 2013: Taylor and Selena Gomez hang out, and Taylor potentially writes Wildest Dreams.

July 15, 2013: Taylor gives a brief interview to Rolling Stone

“The floodgates just opened the last couple weeks,” she says of the songwriting process. “I’m getting to that point where I’m irritating to be around because I’ll be with you for half the conversation and then the second half of the conversation I’m clearly editing the second verse of whatever I’m writing in my head.” “I really loved collaborating [on Red],” she says. “You work with a lot of different people and you find the people you have this dream connection with in the studio. I know those people and I know the ones I want to go back to. But I also have a really long list of the people I admire and I would really love to go and contact. So that’s kind of where that is.” “I think that the idea of having a different approach to every single one of my albums is so exciting to me. I never want to make the same record twice. Why do it? What’s the point? It’s so overwhelming that when you’re starting a project there are such endless possibilities if you’re willing to evolve and experiment. If you’re willing to become a different version of yourself, you can really go anywhere with it. And that’s kind of where I am. The kind of the laboratory experimental stage of really catching onto a new thing that I’m liking.”

July 18, 2013: Taylor unfollows the three backup dancers that left her tour for Katy's, meaning Bad Blood was likely written sometime between July and November 2013.

Sweeter Than Fiction: Summer 2013 (Speculation)

Taylor wrote this one over email, and then it was recorded in New York (partially in Jack's living room, partially in an actual studio)

August 25, 2013: Taylor and Selena Gomez hang out at the VMAs, and Taylor potentially writes Wildest Dreams.

August 25, 2013: Taylor gives a brief interview on the VMAs red carpet

"But I think [songwriting is] about to start to kick into full gear. I'm about to go into the studio. It's about to get really intense."

Out Of The Woods: September 14 2013 (Inferring)

On September 14, Fun cancelled their show. Taylor was likely either flying to or from Charlottesville, where she had a show for the Red Tour. Jack: "When I did the track for Out of the Woods, which is a Taylor song that I'm really proud of, there was some issue at a venue and our show was canceled that night and I didn't have my stuff, I had left it on the bus, so I only had these old samples on what was on my laptop, and caught up that 'oh oh'' thing, and I only had one drum kit on there, and these dumb little things [sometimes turn into a great song]" Jack: "So 'Out Of The Woods' was the third thing we worked on together, and probably the easiest. I sent her the track for it, and she sent back a voice note with the verse and chorus in what felt like five seconds. And it was just perfect. It's eerie how similar it is to what the final product is." Taylor: "This is a track that Jack Antonoff sent me, and I was actually on a plane, I got it and I got on a plane and I'm listening to it, and I'm just like listening to it and mumbling melodies cause the song came to me immediately like, in full [...] I think what I should start by playing you, is when I got the track, what I sent him like an hour later, and it is, me.. um, me singing what came to me, which ended up being the finished version of the song, or at least really close to it."

September 20, 2013: In a brief interview with USA Today, Taylor says she plans to work on her next album between the next few legs of the Red Tour

"I’ll be in the studio, figuring out what comes next. I really like to take two years to make a record, and I’ve been writing and doing stuff for the last year. This is kind of the year that it goes into overdrive, and it’s all I think about and I become obsessive over it and I’m hard to talk to"

September 22, 2013: Taylor gives an interview to New York Magazine where she talks about her plans for TS5

These days, Swift is thinking a lot about her next record. While on the Red tour, she’d been writing songs and stockpiling ideas: reams of lyrics, thousands of voice memos in her iPhone [...] she plans to spend much of 2014 writing and recording the new album, a prospect she finds exhilarating and terrifying. “I worry about everything. Some days I wake up in a mind-set of, like, ‘Okay, it’s been a good run.’ By afternoon, I could have a change of mood and feel like anything is possible and I can’t wait to make this kind of music I’ve never made before. And then by evening, I could be terrified of the whole thing again. And then at night, I’ll write a song before bed.” Swift hopes to collaborate with new songwriters and producers. But she planned to begin, she said, by heading back into the studio with Max Martin and Shellback. “I want to go in with Max and Johan first, just to figure out what the bone structure of this record is going to be. “I have a lot of things to draw from emotionally at the moment. But I have to draw from them with a different perspective than on Red. I can’t say the same things over and over, you know? I mean, I think it’s just all the more important that I don’t ever allow myself to coast. At the same time, there’s a mistake that I see artists make when they’re on their fourth or fifth record, and they think innovation is more important than solid songwriting. The most terrible letdown as a listener for me is when I’m listening to a song and I see what they were trying to do. Like, where there’s a dance break that doesn’t make any sense, there’s a rap that shouldn’t be there, there’s like a beat change that’s, like, the coolest, hippest thing this six months—but it has nothing to do with the feeling, it has nothing to do with the emotion, it has nothing to do with the lyric. I never want to put things in songs just because that might make them popular, like, on the more rhythmic stations or in dance clubs. I really don’t want a compilation of sounds. I just need them to be songs.”

September 28-October 5, 2013: Taylor and Selena Gomez are in the same city, and Taylor potentially writes Wildest Dreams.

October 12, 2013: Taylor gives an interview to the Associated Press

Swift: I think the goal for the next album is to continue to change, and never change in the same way twice [...] How do I write these figurative diary entries in ways that I’ve never written them before and to a sonic backdrop that I’ve never explored before? It’s my fifth album, which is crazy to think about, but I think what I’m noticing about it so far is it’s definitely taking a different turn than anything I’ve done before. AP: You said recently you’ve been working on songs for the new album for about six months. What can you tell us about what you have planned? Swift: It’s too early to tell who are going to be my predominant collaborators, but I do know that my absolute dream collaborators were Shellback and Max Martin on the last project. I’ve never been so challenged as a songwriter. I’ve never learned so much. I’ve never just been so excited to show up to the studio every day, just because you never know what we’re going to put together. I’ll bring in ideas and they’ll take such a different turn than where I thought they were going to go, and that level of unexpected spontaneity is something that really thrills me in the process of making music. ... What if we did this? What if we made it weirder? What if we took it darker? I love people who have endless strange and exciting ideas about where music can go."

October 14, 2013: At the NSAI, Taylor talks about reinventing herself for different albums

"I’m making my 5th record now, so I think you have to change things up, you have to explore different corners of music as much as you can. Cause I really, it’s been a big goal of mine to never make two albums that sounded the same. I really want my fans to be able to be like "Oh that song? Clearly that's from the Fearless album", "No that one, that one was from Red" and so I’m in the process of doing that thing all over again for my 5th album and it’s amazing to be in the studio and to be songwriting again, and be honored for songwriting tonight"

Blank Space: October 26, 2013 (Inferring)

It looks like she’s wearing the same outfit in this behind the scenes footage and these candids Taylor: "I was going into write with Max Martin and Shellback, who are two of the primary collaborators on 1989, and I... was preparing all these things, and I, I think Blank Space was like the third thing I played them, and they just stopped and they were like "NO, this is the first thing we're working on today." [...] I had the idea for the chorus and I had the hook, but a lot of the verse was gibberish." Taylor (On what song took her the least amount of time to write): "Blank space, cause I'd written a lot of the lines down already in the year preceding the session"

October 29, 2013: Tweets "Sitting in the studio writing the next album (!!!!) and wanted to thank you for the American Music Award nominations!"

November 1 : While promoting Keds, Taylor is asked about her next album

"What I go through is going to be the story that I tell. I think lyrically, I always try to tell my fans exactly what’s happened to me in the last two years, and that’s the thing they can expect. Everything else, they won’t be able to expect. Having been in the studio with this one, I’m just like… oh, this is going to be fun"

Bad Blood: Fall 2013 (Speculation)

The backup dancer drama seems to have kicked off in mid-July. Given that it's produced by Max Martin and Shellback, and Taylor was in the studio with them pretty much non-stop from October-November, we can assume that it was recorded sometime in the Fall of 2013

New Romantics: Fall 2013 (Speculation)

Unfortunately, Taylor doesn't really talk about this song. Given that it's produced by Max Martin and Shellback, and Taylor was in the studio with them pretty much non-stop from October-November, we can assume that it was recorded sometime in the Fall of 2013

Wildest Dreams: Fall 2013 (Speculation)

Selena reportedly told a fan she was there when Taylor wrote this, and I've noted above all the times Selena could have been with Taylor in 2013 (Here's my personal ranking of how likely each date is). Given that it's produced by Max Martin and Shellback, and Taylor was in the studio with them pretty much non-stop from October-November, we can assume that it was recorded sometime in the Fall of 2013.

Wonderland: Fall 2013 (Speculation)

Another one Taylor just doesn't talk about all that often. Given that it's produced by Max Martin and Shellback, and Taylor was in the studio with them pretty much non-stop from October-November, we can assume that it was recorded sometime in the Fall of 2013

Nov 20, 2013: Taylor posted "While in the studio, I came to the realization that my bangs are long enough to use as a sleep mask on long flights. Then I remembered I don't ever use sleep masks on flights. So really, I just need a haircut"

November 25, 2013: Taylor and Scott Borchetta have a meeting to talk about her plans for TS5 and are both asked about the next album at the AMAs

Taylor: “We got a lot already. There are probably seven or eight [songs] that I know I want on the record. It’s really ahead of schedule for me. I’m just stoked because it’s already evolved into a new sound, and that’s all I wanted. And I would have taken two years to make that happen, but it just kind of happened naturally, so that’s all I could really ask for.” Scott Borchetta: "Well earlier today we got together and she played me seven new songs, and she’s just on fire. The level of desire and passion that she has just to keep getting better, she’s an artist that just really never wants to just say ‘Well okay this is good enough’. It’s always gotta be better. She’s in amazing creative place right now." By the end of November, Taylor had likely recorded This Love, All You Had To Do Was Stay, How You Get The Girl, I Wish You Would, Out Of The Woods, Blank Space, Bad Blood, New Romantics, Wildest Dreams, and Wonderland. That’s 10 songs total, 5 of which were likely recorded in the past two months, and 7 that had been made since Taylor and Jack had their conversation about 80s music in May.

Dec 21, 2013: Taylor briefly talks to Billboard about TS5

"I’m really loving collaboration right now [...] I see it as a bit of an apprenticeship. I want to be around people who love writing songs and have done it for years. Every time I’m in a studio I’m learning, like how to build a drum track, and getting a new perspective on things. It’s so thrilling to keep learning on your fifth album. As soon as [an album] comes out I’m figuring out what the next one will be. It’s gotten to the point where each one is a reinvention, which is what I like best. I like it when it sounds new and people don’t know where you’re going to go next."

Say Don't Go: Jan 1, 2014 (Confirmed)

Diane Warren: Warren, who typically writes on her own, says the two of them “sat down and wrote the song […] from scratch” during the last few days of 2013. She remembers being impressed with how specific Swift was with her lyricism and how considerate she was about how her fans might receive it. “She was very particular about how she said certain things. It was a really interesting experience. She gets her audience [...] She’s deeply aware of how her fans want to hear something. I can’t explain it, but that’s probably why she’s the biggest fucking star in the world.” Several days after writing the song together, they got into Warren’s office to record a demo, where Swift played it on her acoustic guitar. “We demoed it on New Year’s Day. And I’m a workaholic, and that’s fine for me,” she says. “But I remember being impressed that she did, too. Everybody’s on vacation, but she showed up.”

You Are In Love: Jan 2014 (Inferring)

This song is copyrighted for 2014. Taylor has said a few times that Clean, Shake It Off, and Style were the last songs written for the album, meaning You Are In Love was likely completed in January or early February. Given Taylor's busy schedule in late January and early February, I'd guess this was written at some point in early January. Furthermore, I'd guess it was sometime after the 9th, when she returned from looking at house in New York.

I Know Places: Jan 22, 2014 (Confirmed)

Taylor: "I sent this voice memo to Ryan Tedder because I'd always wanted to work with him, and finally we scheduled some studio time. So I always wanna be prepared, I wanted to send him the idea that I was working on before we went into the studio just in case he wrote back and said "I can't stand that, I wanna work on something else, think of something else" So I just sat down with the piano, put my phone on top of the piano and just kind of explained to him where I wanted to go with the song, how I saw the melody sitting in and we ended up recording the song the next day and it ended up being on the record called "I Know Places" So this was the voice memo that I sent to him the night before we ended up finishing the song"

Welcome To New York: Jan 23, 2014 (Confirmed)

Ryan Tedder: "I thought we were going to walk in and start something from scratch because that's what I was used to. Then she calls me and says, 'Is it cool if I already have an idea?' I said, 'Sure.' She said, 'I have this song, I'm obsessed with New York and I just moved there, I want to write an ode to New York because no one's done it in a long time.' And then she sent me a voice memo. She's like, 'I want it to sound like 1980s.' So the next day I brought in a Juno-106, which is a very 1980s keyboard and I literally programmed that entire song right in front of her. It was very much on the fly, and that song was done in about three hours. And I did the rest of the production I think later that week. I was in Switzerland on a tour bus, and I did four versions of 'Welcome to New York,' one of which I liked personally more, but the thing about artists is they become very obsessed with the demo. She was in love with the demo so no matter how hard I fought, she brought it back to the demo, so really what you hear is what I did on the first day."

January 26 2014: Dianne Warren says that she recently wrote a song with Taylor

"I worked with Taylor Swift on a great song [...] I'm excited about the [song] that we did, it's pretty cool Dianne in 2016: “I know [Swift] likes it, so hopefully it will see the light of day. I know she really likes the song. She didn’t want me to give it away, so hopefully that means she wants it.”

January 26 2014: Taylor loses Album of the Year at the Grammy's to Daft Punk. She tells a few different stories about what the rest of the night looked like for her-- in some she goes home alone, in some she has some friends over-- but in all of them, this is the night where she decides that she's gonna name the album 1989, and she's not going to let her label tell her to put any country songs on it.

Clean: Feb 9, 2014 (Confirmed)

According to Imogen Heap's blog post, Taylor had the first verse and chorus by the time they got into the studio, and then wrote the second verse and bridge during the session. Taylor's part was wrapped up in 9 hours, ending at 8pm, while Imogen stayed up until 4am because she didn't want to stop working on it. Taylor: ""Shake It Off" and "Clean" were the last two things we wrote for the record, so it shows you where I ended up mentally. “Clean” I wrote as I was walking out of Liberty in London. Someone I used to date— it hit me that I’d been in the same city as him for two weeks and I hadn’t thought about it. When it did hit me, it was like, ‘Oh, I hope he’s doing well’. And nothing else. [...] The first thought that came to my mind was – I’m finally clean." Imogen Heap: I was really writing the tiniest amount just to help her do what she does. I put some noises to [“Clean”], played various instruments on it, including drums, and anytime she expressed she liked something I was doing, I did it more. It was a really fun day. She recorded all her vocals [for “Clean”] during that one session. She did two takes, and the second take was it. We always thought she would probably re-record it, because we thought it can’t possibly be that easy. But after we lived with it for a few months, we felt it was great.

February 15, 2014: Taylor posts "It was a studio Valentines Day with Max and Johan!"

Shake It Off: Feb 15, 2014 (Confirmed)

Lover Diaries (From Feb 22): "This week I’ve been in the studio with Max and Johan every day and it has been the most creatively successful and fulfilling time. The first day, Johan just made a really up tempo drum beat because we decided we needed something UP and light. We worked at it for a few hours before I just started singing “shake it off, shake it off.” And then the best way I know how to describe it is that the chorus just fell out of the sky. It ended up being this song about doing your own thing even though haters are gonna hate, and you just have to dance to your own beat. We all went home and I wrote the first and second verses and brought them in the next day. We wrote this chanty cheer leader bridge that I absolutely LOVE. We spent all day doing vocals and the next day recording background vocals. I think it’ll end up being the first single and Max said it’s his favorite song he’s ever been a part of." Taylor: "The problem was, I had all these lyrics, and I didnt have, like... writing session was coming up and I'm just like "I'm not getting a melody, I'm dead, I don't know what I'm gonna do." The thought terrified me, so I just sorta sulked into the studio and I was like "Guys, I have like an idea but its like, lyric, but I... and I know the vibe I want-- I want it to start off and the second the song starts, I want it to be the song where like, if it's played at a wedding, and there's this one girl who hasn't danced all night at the reception, all her friends come over to her and there like "You have to dance, come on, you have to dance on this one!". That's what I wanted. So I was like "Shellback, can you just go to the drum kit and try to play that?" Taylor: "There's one thing that I've always said to Max, is like "I don't like horns" I just always had a thing about it, I was always like weirdly scared of it, or intimidated by horns, I don't know what it was? It's a weird, like, nerdy studio fear of mine. I was like "No, no horns!" and I don't.. I don't even know, I don't have a reason for it, I love songs that have horns on them, I was just like "I don't think I can pull off horns." Strange. But, he goes over to the mellotron and he starts playing this horn sound. I'm like "What are you doing. Don't do that." and he's like, "No, I think this is cool" and I'm like "No it's not cool, and where are your chorus chords, because, that, you're just playing three chords over and over again and I can't make a chorus out of them, why don't you go to like a chorus chord that starts off the chorus, where is the one, like why don't you go--" and then there was this moment, where I thought of the whole chorus, and it's over the chords that I had just told him are not "chorus chords", which is a ridiculous thing to say."

February 18, 2014: Taylor is photographed entering Conway Studios

Style: Feb 19, 2014 (Confirmed)

Niklas Ljungfelt (guitarist): I played on “Style,” a song I started with Ali Payami for ourselves. He was playing it for Max Martin at his studio; Taylor overheard it and loved it. She and Max wrote new lyrics. But I recorded the guitar on it before it was a Taylor song. It was an instrumental. I didn’t have a clue that Taylor would sing on it. The inspiration came from Daft Punk and funky electronic music. Taylor: I'm pretty sure after we finished this one I knew the record was done. Shake It Off and Style were the last two songs to be written for 1989.

March 2014: Taylor's interview with Glamour is published (likely conducted two months beforehand)

TS: Working on this album has been unbelievable [...] I'm already in love with it. It's so different. CL: What's the new sound? TS: On Red I did three songs with Max Martin Shellback [...] I think we'll be doing a lot more than three songs together on the next album [Laughs].

March 26, 2014: Taylor is photographed entering a music studio in New York

"Slut!": 2014 (Unknown)

Taylor: The song “Slut!” is a song we wrote for 1989 and in it, I kind of cheekily play on the discussions at that time of my life around my dating life. And that’s not the only time on 1989 that I’d done that, I’ve done that on “Blank Space” and when I came down to having to pick songs for the album, I think I though, “Okay, well, I’m going to choose ‘Blank Space’” and, unfortunately, had to make some tough decisions in terms of what to put on the tracklist. But I love this song because I think it’s really dreamy. And I always saw 1989 as a New York album, but this song, to me, was always California, and maybe that was another reason it didn’t make the cut, because sometimes, thematically, I just had these little weird rules in my head. But I’m so happy it’s finally going to be something you guys hear, because I have always been proud of it, I’ve always wanted it to come out into the world and now it is, so yay!

Suburban Legends: 2014 (Unknown)

Taylor hasn't talked about this song, and it was produced by Jack Antonoff, who she didn't schedule time in the studio with in the same way she did with Max Martin and Shellback, so there's not a lot to work with.

Is It Over Now?: 2014 (Unknown)

Similarly to Suburban Legends, Jack produced this, so there's no obvious point in time to point to. She has spoken briefly about it though. Taylor: “Is It Over Now” is a song I wanted to end the album with because I think it’s kind of a fun play on words of like, “Is the album over now?” I always saw this song as sort of a sister to “Out Of The Woods” and “I Wish You Would,” I kind of saw those songs as similar, so, unfortunately, when we were making these decisions of what to put on 1989 and what to leave behind, I had to make some tough choices, and now it doesn’t matter anymore because you guys are going to hear all the songs. I’m so happy this song is out. I really love the “let’s fast forward to three hundred takeout coffees later,” that session, I just feel like head banging to every time it comes on. Hope you agree.

May 30, 2014: Taylor writes in her diary:

So a crazy story unfolded in the last 24 hours. Last night, I had this vivid dream where the photo I’d chosen for the album cover wasn’t good enough, intriguing enough, artful enough. It woke me up. I couldn’t shake it and it stayed with me all day. Because that nagging feeling I’d been pushing back for weeks was now confirmed in my gut … It wasn’t good enough. I went to the venue, mind racing, wondering if I’d have to do an entirely new photo shoot … I got to my dressing room with newer versions of the “cover.” I looked at it and felt nothing. The team pulled up this new scanned file of the Polaroids we had taken during the shoot. I saw within 10 seconds. The shot. The cover. It’s a Polaroid of me sitting against a beige wall with a blue seagull swear shirt on. You can see my red lips, but the photo cuts off my eyes. From some reason unknown to me, it’s the most intriguing photo I’ve seen. I think it’s the mystery of not seeing my eyes. Maybe it just looks effortlessly cool. The craziest moment came when something caught my eye. The cover photo is photo 13. I kid you not.

August 23, 2014: Taylor is photographed walking out of a studio in LA (Note: I can not find a place that specifies if this is a recording studio, dance, photography, radio, or television studio.)

Now That We Don't Talk: Summer 2014 (Speculation)

Seeing as Taylor said she didn't have time to figure out the production, I imagine this came fairly late in the process. Taylor has a habit of adding songs right up to the deadline-- with Folklore and Evermore, she added multiple songs a week before the album came out. The latest she added songs to albums while signed to Big Machine was September, though (both Forever & Always and So It Goes...), so I assume that's the absolute latest she could've added a song to 1989. Taylor: "Now That We Don’t Talk” is one of my favorite songs that was left behind, it was so hard to leave it behind, but I think we wrote it a little bit towards the end of the process and we couldn’t get the production right at the time. But we had tons of time to perfect the production this time and figure out what we wanted this song to sound like. I think it’s the shortest song I’ve ever had, but I think it packs a punch, I think it really goes in. For the short amount of time we have, I think it makes its point.

And that's all for this timeline! Check out my others:

TIMELINES: debut • fearless • speak now • red • 1989 • rep • lover • folklore • evermore • midnights PLAYLISTS: debut • fearless • speak now • red • 1989 • rep • lover • folklore • evermore • midnights • entire discography GENERAL: tag

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[8:02 pm]

(cw: very brief and vague mention of reader being naked)

One of your favorite things about Jaemin was how affectionate he was. Without a doubt every morning you'd be greeted with a kiss placed on your cheek and every night you'd go to sleep with his lips pressed to your forehead. It was very rare that you'd leave the house and not have him touching you in some way, hand holding, hand in your pocket, arm around your shoulder- something.

There were times that occurred very rarely where the affection turned the slightest bit... clingy. You'd never tell him but not having your own personal space could be overwhelming. Today was one of those days where the only alone time you'd had all day was earlier in the morning when you were brushing your teeth.

Right now you were trying to extract yourself from Jaemin's arms to get in the shower, he was whining, "I can join you."

"I won't even be long and you're watching your show," you reasoned.

"Jaemin," you whined exasperatedly, "please, my love. It won't take longer than 15 minutes."

He mumbled something about that being too long and his arms dropped, he was preparing to get down and beg you not to leave his side, but you used that opportunity to run to the bathroom.

You took a relieved breath standing under the warm stream of water. You were washing your hair when all of a sudden you heard, "Aren't you almost out of shampoo? Should I add it to the list?"

You froze, eyes snapping open. You peeked out from behind the shower curtain, catching sight of Jaemin sitting on the toilet with his phone out. He looked up and smiled brightly at you, "Did you like this scent or do you want to go back to your usual? I really like this one, but I like the old one too."

You took a deep breath to calm your heightened feelings of annoyance, "Jaemin, can I please have my shower time to myself?"

You probably shouldn't have been surprised, the longer your relationship went, the less personal time you'd have. This wasn't the first time he had decided to join your shower time without actually joining you in the shower. Sometimes he would sit on the counter or the toilet and ask you about work or gossip with you. You usually wouldn't mind, but today you were hoping for a simple shower alone.

Jaemin cried, "Do you hate me?! Is that what it is?!"

You laughed out loud before you could stop yourself, "Jaemin, why would I hate you?"

His head peeks into the shower and his eyes meet yours immediately. He's not even phased with your body being completely bare in front of him, and you love it. "Well, you ran away from me and you're depriving me of my cuddle time."

You place your hands on your hips, and raise an eyebrow at him, "Your cuddle time has been going on for over 10 hours now just today. Yesterday was another 14 hours, and that's not even including when we were asleep. As much as I love you, I need space to myself sometimes."

Jaemin clutched his chest dramatically, "Oh my god, my heart has just been ripped out of my chest and stomped all over my a crowd of people."

"Can you leave me now?" You asked softly, not wanting to hurt his feelings.

"Of course, baby," he answered quickly. He leaned further into the shower and placed a kiss on your mouth, not even bothered by the fact that he was getting wet.

You heard the door open and then, "I'm actually glad you're showering. I didn't want to say anything, but you were starting to get a little stinky."

"Get out!" You yelled.

"I love you!"

[rwuffles]

ABOUT.

pt: about. end pt.

hello & welcome to our 700 follower event! it will be going from 07/30 to 08/03 (mm/dd), lasting for 5 days with a corresponding theme for each! those who participate in all 5 days will be placed into a raffle for the event prizes :]

RULES.

pt: rules. end pt.

01.  ✦✦✦  those who are on my dni(link) may not participate

02.  ✦✦✦  you may make anything for the event days ( i.e. nputs, id packs, coins / flags, edits, etc. ), however, you may not make transids or radqueer-related terms

03.  ✦✦✦  to be eligible for the event prizes, you must: participate in all 5 days & have been following me before the event

04.  ✦✦✦  you must tag me in any of your event entries & use the tag "rwuffles700"!

05.  ✦✦✦  posting an entry after the day is okay, however, posting beforehand is not

06.  ✦✦✦  have fun :]

PROMPTS.

pt: prompts. end pt.

DAY 01 (07/30)  ✦✦✦  a niche / underrated game you enjoy

DAY 02 (07/31)  ✦✦✦  least favorite video game character

DAY 03 (08/01)  ✦✦✦  an old-school game ( i.e. tetris, pac-man, galaga, etc. )

DAY 04 (08/02)  ✦✦✦  a random game genre

DAY 05 (08/03)  ✦✦✦  free day

PRIZES.

pt: prizes. end pt.

1ST PLACE  ✦✦✦  4 of anything we offer on our blog & a 3-page custom made rentry

2ND PLACE  ✦✦✦  3 of anything we offer on our blog & a 2-page custom made rentry

3RD PLACE  ✦✦✦  2 of anything we offer on our blog & a 1-page custom made rentry

prizes can be subbed out for something else after you're picked as a winner, please just discuss with me beforehand

EXTRA.

pt: extra. end pt.

if you complete the following list of tasks alongside the event prompts, your name will be placed into the raffle twice! these are not mandatory, but are more just for fun & give you a higher chance of winning :] you should include these in or in the reblogs of your event submissions!

01  ✦✦✦  add a screenshot of the / your player character on your current favorite game

02  ✦✦✦  share your favorite part of playing video games, if you do — if not, share a hobby & why you enjoy it

03  ✦✦✦ listen to & share a fansong ( or official song ) of any game of your choosing

04  ✦✦✦  show a picture of a meal or food from a game that you would eat in real life

05  ✦✦✦  talk about something you've wanted to for a while but haven't gotten the chance to

may our event get a boost? not forced, but thank you if you do!  :  @3dlove @puriette @kiruliom @sevvys @rabidbatboy @vampitsm @hanahakibf @jirai-doll @winecovered @disrealities @mantra-repeated

THANKS.

pt: thanks. end pt.

thank you to everyone who helped us get here :] when we initially started this blog, it was meant as an escape & a break from coining and creating things for others. we wanted a space where we could just create for ourself, without having to worry about others' approval. i didn't expect it to grow, considering how niche what i made was.

but, through creating things for myself, i've found a small community of people like me. i don't think i'd have met, or even remained friends with a lot of people if i didn't start this blog. i'm forever grateful for it, and for the people i met through it. so, thank you to everyone! everyone who loved what i created and encouraged me to keep going!

[catras-breakup-song]

Do you think catra has a victim complex? I once read a post explaining she has one and while the op is a very passionate anti of the character and the show, I think they do make an interesting point explaining why she has a victim complex

Thoughts on this?

i think she develops a "victim complex" (although i'm not sure that's the most accurate way to label it, nor am i comfortable claiming that's the complete picture here) in response to how she genuinely views the way the world treated her. she made adora's leaving the horde all about herself because she truly couldn't understand how adora might have a more empathetic motivation than glory until bonding over their friendship with glimmer on the velvet glove. as 5X5T puts it from 15:45 - 16:12 here:

at the same time that she's processing these memories, she starts to connect with glimmer; glimmer, who shares her burden of an impulsive choice that almost ended the world, glimmer, who has shared her same insecurities. catra listens to her talk about her friendship with adora and relates back with stories of her own. maybe adora didn't leave for power and glory. maybe adora loves glimmer, and maybe she really did love catra too.

not to mention, it really was the big deal catra had made it out to be, practically in terms of life or death. much more than losing a friend, she lost the only hope she had been promised of protection while growing up. before adopting and then later subverting the narrative herself, outside forces had made it clear to her that without adora, she was too vulnerable to be safe and shadow weaver would inevitably dispose of her.

when it comes to all the times catra shot down adora's offers to join the rebellion instead of staying behind, it honestly comes down to a misunderstanding of what that would mean, more so than a falsely-assumed deliberate misinterpretation in order to suit a narrative ─ that being said, it absolutely was intentionally twisted, though not by catra, but rather by light hope's holographic memory projections instead.

for analysis of how they each heard the other's words during the thaymor confrontation, take this whole entire post.

for another perspective, including but mostly focusing on fixing the alternate reality and going back to the way things were before, read/listen to five by five takes' quotes again, from here (11:10 - 12:02):

catra and adora are each deciding what the other means, and they’re not really expressing what they’re feeling, fearing, or wanting. catra can’t understand why adora can ask her to come with her, but not stay; adora can’t understand why catra can ask her to stay but not come with her, and it’s in the difference between “why can’t you stay” and “i will never go with you” that is the key of their misunderstanding, that they still haven’t resolved. we see the promise recontextualized, to see the same memory from different vantage points. for adora, asking catra to come with her is looking out for her; for catra, adora is still treating her as an afterthought and not staying. it’s not as simple as just “being together,” for catra. she clearly sees a distinction between "staying with me" and "going with you". one maintains things as they are, on her terms. the other is big scary change, following adora’s terms. ("oh, because i need to follow you everywhere you go?!")

& here (6:30 - 8:32):

"promise" is this thing that sort of haunts the entire show. catra and adora grew up in a dangerous environment, and so promised each other that they'd stay together and always look out for each other. [...] this is the first instance where catra really starts to embrace the idea that adora broke the promise, because despite her feelings until now, catra's still been looking out for adora (between friend kidnappings, at least...). her conviction has been and continues teetering back and forth throughout the episode. it may even be that adora was close to getting through to catra because it's right at that moment that she says "i never wanted to leave you. you could come with me! you could join the rebellion! i know you're not a bad person, catra, you don't belong with the horde." that the crystal castle pulls out the big gun. their opportunity to clarify their feelings gets cut short, but by the end catra becomes convinced that her desire to help adora wasn't reciprocated. she has a new view of the promise: "you wanted me to think i needed you; you wanted me to feel weak." not only did adora break the promise to stay together ─ "you never protected me!" ─ now it's no longer about keeping the promise and getting adora back, it's just about proving herself as a powerful, independent, and worthy opponent. [...] in her backwards way, catra reclaims what she sees as her lost power. adora wants her back and now she (catra) gets to reject her. by virtue of a perfect world, "remember" shows us catra's ideal way for the promise to be kept: "nothing really bad can happen as long as we have each other." (1x11) vs. "everything will be perfect as long as we stay together." "stay with me, okay?" (3x05) this sheds some important light on the semantics of it all; the huge difference between "staying with me" and "leaving with you".

i know it's a lot of text, and i hope it doesn't come across as too lazy on my end, but i really think those blocks explain it better than i could just by attempting to paraphrase them. it shouldn't be difficult to realize how catra had always been set up from the start to have such an outlook on the people who came and went from her life. she drew conclusions based on what she had been taught thus far, and in those moments it made total sense, even if it wasn't the objective truth.

[onlymurdersinthebuildingreblogs]

Only Murders In the Building Season Four Finale Thoughts While Watching

WARNING SPOILERS FOR ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING SEASON THREE FINALE AND SEASON FOUR!!!!!! INCLUDING THE KILLER! AVOID IF YOU ARE NOT THAT FAR INTO THE SERIES, IF YOU AREN'T YOU BETTER, IT IS SO GOOD!

Note: I lost track of the day of the week and didn't realize the episode had aired until I was in bed.

Pre-Watching:

I wonder if the plot holes Sazz had found were unrelated to her murderer, Marshall/Rex. Set up for the next season.

I hope Theo appears, I really like his character. I also think he's good for Mabel.

I'd also like to see Lucy. I really liked her character.

Watching:

1:07-1:27 -- Oh, so they have filmed for Brazzos!? At least, Sazz got some more time with Charles.

1:16 -- "TAP IN!"

1:27 -- Isn't Sazz a little too old for stunts like that? Jane Lynch is 64 years old.

1:46 -- Osteoporosis! That sounds like a disease. Is that a disease!? (One Google Search Later) Google: "Osteoporosis is a bone disease that weakens bones, making them more likely to break. Osteoporosis occurs when the body breaks down more bone than it replaces, causing bones to become less dense and more porous. This makes bones more fragile and susceptible to fractures, even from minor bumps or falls. Osteoporosis is often called a 'silent disease' because people may not notice any symptoms until they break a bone. Osteoporosis is the leading cause of broken bones in older people and postmenopausal women." Me: YEAH, APPARENTLY SHE IS! "MINOR BUMPS OR FALLS"!? SHE JUST DID A FLIP AND JUMPED FROM A STORY-TALL BUILDING! "I'M GOOD"!? DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT!?

2:10 -- "Hey, Sazz, you okay!?" Aw, at least, Charles is making sure she's okay, even if she's kind of lying to him. She's making sure he's okay.

3:06-3:14 -- Not related but accent letter choices, why can't they have that on laptop keyboards, instead you have to know like shortcuts and then some laptops don't have those shortcut buttons. Like my old laptop had a numeric keypad so if I wanted to do the em dash, I would hold "alt" then push 0151, but my new laptop keyboard doesn't, so I can't make that dash and I use it more than you think. Look at the lazy double dashes, I've put.

3:18-3:27: "Every time we solve a murder that's when the next body drops. It's like when one murder door closes, someone we know either gets stabbed, poisoned, or shot." I guess that's kind of true? Jan stabbed herself and then poisoned you. "Glitter Guy" attacked Mabel and she stabbed him like the awesome girl she is. (I would say bad*** but I don't like to curse. So what's the age-appropriate way to say that?) Charles pretended to be stabbed by Alice. I don't actually think that happened last season though. There was when Donna poisoned Ben and nearly killed him and then Cliff pushed him down. I guess, Cliff nearly committed suicide. Also he already killed Glen.

3:28-3:35 -- "Why would you say that? You know my wedding is tomorrow. Loretta's on her way now, here to the murder building." That didn't occur to you when you picked this place as the place your wedding would take place at? Your podcast is called "Only Murders in the Building".

4:02 -- It's always kind of annoying when the villain is like "do this or I'll kill you" like they're not going to do that anyways.

4:15 -- Oh, I'm so hoping Mabel beats him up! She is not the kind of woman you want to mess with!

7:02-7:27 -- They're gonna go on the ledge. I don't like height so I don't think this is going to go well for Charles.

7:47 -- Oh! Nope! Nope! Too high! Too high!

10:20 -- I know the feeling! Every time I'm on a high place, I feel like I'm tipping forwards. Ever since when I was around eight, when I was on top of a lighthouse, looking down over the railing and my brother picked me up to take a picture without telling me and I suddenly felt like I was somehow falling over the ledge and I started panicking and he had to put me down before he dropped.

10:54 -- "Are you on this ledge, because I'm moving to New Zealand?"

11:52 -- And now they're dancing on a thin ledge several stories up.

11:55 -- How is no one seeing them? I once sat on the window sill of a second story building and apparently someone called the cops because of that!?

12:22-12:45 -- Marshall, you're doing a terrible job at being causal. You're switching accents from southern to Scottish.

12:49 -- Vince and Rudy are barley doing a better job. "Whatever you have is what we're looking for."

18:46 -- "I'm gonna fly to New York to see Charles make his Broadway debut." Aw. I never actually considered the though that she had seen the play.

22:05 -- Oh, she knew Charles would find him!

23:07 -- Jan to the rescue!? Didn't see that coming! I thought it'd be Rudy or Vince.

28:40 -- Finally, Will comes back! And oh, Dickie, I didn't expect to see you, I forgot about him.

32:07 -- Is Uma going to be the next victim?

32:14-32:54 -- Season five set up?

32:32 -- What did Nicky have to do with the building?

32:54 -- Oh, Sophia's going to be the next body, isn't she?

34:32 -- There's blood coming out of the water fountain's mouth.

34:48 -- LESTER!?

35:10 -- "72 emergencies ahead of you" Are you kidding me!? No wonder podcasters are the only ones who seem to be able to catch killers!

[putschki1969]

2024/02/19 Blog post by Wakana ふむふむの日2024を振り返ろう♪〜映画と衣装と肩の骨〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Looking Back At February 6 2024 ♪〜Movie, Dresses And Shoulder Bones〜

The other day, I went to see the movie "Golden Kamuy" with a friend 😊I received a special git at the cinema! A panel drawn by the original creator＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／ I was so happy because I didn't expect to get something like this! 😍 The girl I went with is a big fan of the original work, actually, she is such a hardcore fan that she and her husband have even gone on a proper pilgrimage to Abashiri which is a place from the manga. I also enjoyed the manga so I decided to go and watch the film with her! The visuals were so powerful and the music was so wonderful that (despite the fairly fantasy-like setting) I felt a strange sense of reality that made me cry many times... It was the first time I watched a movie at the cinema since ``The Boy and the Heron'', I had a lot of fun! 😆 (By the way, the girl who went with me was the same friend who went with me when I watched “The Boy and the Heron” for the second time♪) Being at the movie theater for the first time in a long while got me really excited, initially, I only wanted to get some oolong tea at the snack bar but then, I ended up with all of this😂 How did this happen? When I looked at the menu, I got really excited 🤣I got a large popcorn and a hot dog *laughs*

Hello, this is Wakana (0￣▽￣0)／

I couldn't finish the giant popcorn and had to take it home *laughs* I quietly stuffed my mouth with the hot dog before the film had even begun🤤 Even though I had told myself that it would be better to wait until the film was over to avoid getting tired...🥺 Such a fickle nature🥺(Thankfully the movie was so interesting that I didn't feel sleepy at any point)

Now, I would like to talk a little about my “Wakana 5th Anniversary “Prologue” ~Premium Online Live~” which was held on February 6th! Here I am together with Saku-chan who joined me on the piano 😊We also made sure to take a picture where we look a bit cool📸 With this premium online live I celebrated a milestone, the 5th anniversary of my solo debut. I wanted to start my celebrations together with everyone from my fan club! For some reason, those five years actually feel like a longer time... or rather, it feels like a lot more years have passed already. I included the entire “journey” from my solo debut up until now in the setlist!

M-01 Yureru Haru M-02 Tsubasa MC M-03 Ai no Hana M-04 Aki no Sakura (Acoustic ver.) MC M-05 Orange MC M-06 Haru wo Matsu (Kalafina) M-07 Shirushi MC M-08 Kinmokusei M-09 Flag MC M-10 magic moment MC M-11 Sono Saki e

There are songs from my 1st album "Wakana", my 2nd album "magic moment", my EP "Aki no Sakura" and my 3rd album "Sono Saki e"! I ended up cramming in as much as possible since I wanted to create a setlist that would allow me to look back on the past 5 years.😊 During my MCs I tried to express my feelings from each period, hopefully I was able to share some fresh thoughts with you.

I once again realized that the "chat" may be the best part of an online live performances! At live performances with an actual on-site audience it's not really possible to have a real conversation, but online, everyone can talk about all sorts of things. Of course, even if there are no words exchanged between us, I know that people are watching and supporting me but I always feel very relieved when people say a lot of things in the chat (*´- `) It's honestly so reassuring to know that everyone is watching and listening (^-^)

Despite all of that, my surprise lyric mishaps keep happening, whether it's been 5 years or 15 years, I will never get rid of those...😂Why? ? 😂 I could really feel everyone's surprise and kindness from the chat messages, it was a special sense of gratitude that I probably couldn't experience at a live performances with an on-site audience. Thank you again to everyone who watched and supported me! ! My 5th Anniversary celebrations have only just begun. At my upcoming band live on May 12th, I would like to have the time to reflect even more on the past five years ! Details will be posted soon! Please be patient a little while longer~･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+

Lastly, I would like to post some pictures of my dress from February 6th 😆This is the same dress I wore on the cover of my 1st album "Wakana"♪ I also wore it during the encore for my ``VOICE'' tour, at that time, it was altered a bit so it would work better for a live performance 😍 I had my hair down, which is quite unusual for me ♡ The makeup artist also added some sparkling hairpins 😍

I always wonder why my shoulder bones are so prominent...🤣 I think it's a skeletal issue because I am pretty sure not everyone's shoulder looks like that, right? 😂 I don't have any particular pain or problems in this area but I always feel like there's just a lot of bone sticking out. I envy people with smoother shoulders🥺

Anyway, I'm glad I was able to fit into a dress from 5 years ago ･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+ For some reason, that got me super excited! 😂😂 Easy peasy🤗 Yay!

So, that’s it for today! Until next time~ ☆( *'▽'*)/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

『Wakana 5th Anniversary Live』 Details Revealed

To commemorate the 5th Anniversary of Wakana’s solo debut, a special band live will be held for the first time in 3 years! Once again, Wakana will be joined by Satoshi Takebe to deliver a unique live performance together with other musicians. Please look forward to it!

Title: “Wakana 5th Anniversary Live (tentative)” Date: May 12, 2024 ◆1st Stage◆ Open 14:45 / Start 15:30 ◆2nd Stage◆ Open 18:15 / Start 19:00 Venue: I’M A SHOW (capacity: 398 seats) Starring: Wakana, Satoshi Takebe (Music Director/Piano), etc. 【Ticket price】 All seats reserved 8,500円 ※An additional 600円 drink fee will be charged at the venue

Advanced Ticket Lottery for BL Members

[Ticket Sales Service] SKIYAKI TICKET ※To apply, you will need to register your SC ID at "Botanical Land" and your SKIYAKI ID on the SKIYAKI TICKET site/app. Pre-registration is possible, so it is recommended to do this before the application period starts. Please note: The registration procedure includes a verfication via text message which apparently does not work for some overseas phone numbers. ※On the day of the event, present the screen displaying the QR code issued to the SKIYAKI TICKET app (no prints or screenshots permitted); Please note: To display the electronic ticket, a separate app is required

Quantity limit: Up to 2 tickets per person Payment method: Credit card/convenience store payment Ticketing method: Download the dedicated app to issue a QR code ticket Application period: February 21 to February 27 Announcement of Results: March 1~ Payment deadline: March 8

[twincaptains]

Obsequium: Part I: Chapter Four

TITLE: Obsequium Part I: Chapter Four: Mabel's September PAIRINGS: Dipford (Ford x Dipper), Bipford, (Bipper x Ford), Pinecest (Dipper x Mabel), Stancest, (Stan x Ford), and possibly others. Gotta see where this thing takes me. SUMMARY: Mabel e-mails some friends and .... frenemies? Between her erotic RP with Grenda and her terse exchange with Pacifica, our girl is working through some things. Included are helpful (and traumatic) illustrations. They appear in the body of the text. NOTES: There is a LOT more lycan sex than I initially anticipated. Warnings under the cut!

CHAPTER WARNINGS: Graphic werewolf sex, graphic werewolf death (gore), sibling incest OVERALL WARNINGS: Incest, sibling incest, minor, coercive control, mind control, caregiver neglect, physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, dubious consent (dubcon), body horror, suicidal ideation, food restriction, sleep deprivation, self-harm, drug abuse, being drugged, lost time, and I’m going to specifically going to warn for “Ford being cruel to Stanley”, because it made me upset when I wrote it so I want to warn for it. If I forgot anything, please let me know and I will fix it IMMEDIATELY. I will add more if anything else comes up. 

-

To: dipper@mysteryshack.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-02-2016 08:22:16 Subject: Just saw you off.

Just got you all packed up in the car and watched you drive away. I hate this. I hate this so much. You hate it, too. I know it. Why can't you just say that?

Speaking of things you won't say, you're not fooling me. I know, Dip. It's okay. It would be okay if you just told me, but you won't. Are you really that afraid that I'll hate you? After everything we went through? Give me more credit than that!!!

Give me more of everything...

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: dipper@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-02-2016 08:22:56 Subject: Re: Just saw you off.

I'm sorry, but I'm unable to answer your e-mail at the moment! I am temporarily losing access to this account so I can better concentrate on my studies. I hope to have everything in order and be back at it by the end of 2014!

-Dip

***THIS IS AN AUTO-RESPONSE. USER HAS BEEN UNAVAILABLE FOR 1,076 DAYS***

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To: straightblanchin@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-05-16, 22:45:16 PST Subject: Re: I saw Mr. Pines!!!

Really glad you were able to get out to see him! The place he's living isn't as bad as he likes to say it is, he just misses Gravity Falls. I go down there whenever I get the chance, but as soon as I start school my free time disappears. I suppose I could go down there on holidays, but that's the only time I ever get to spend with Dipper. He should be coming up to Washington for Thanksgiving, but he was supposed to come LAST year and he changed his mind.

Do you still call Grunkle Stan? Dipper says he needs more phone calls. I know the cell service there is really whack, but you guys still have a landline, right?

Speaking of Dipper!!! I got to spend the last week of August with Dipper for our birthday, as usual. He seems a bit stressed out, I don't think Grunkle Ford is giving him enough breaks. There's also something he's keeping from me, and in typical Dipper fashion he's doing an extremely bad job of it. I think he's trying to tell me without telling me, but I can't let that slide. He has to just ... say it. I tried to get it out of him all week, but I didn't get anywhere. Maybe I can make some more progress when I see him at Thanksgiving.

I've already gotten a letter from him! He says he's going to try and keep up this year, but ... he never does. He always tries, though, and that's something, right?

Let me know if you plan on visiting Grunkle Stan again anytime soon. Maybe I can try and meet you both!

XoXo Mabel

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To: : lumberjaneinthecity@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-07-2016 22:16:34 PST Subject: Re: New addy!

Hey, Wendy! Glad to hear you're settling in at your new place up in Portland. I don't think I could handle living with that many roommates, guess having all those brothers finally came in handy?

Just curious, do you ever plan on going back to Gravity Falls to visit?

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: lumberjaneinthecity@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-08-2016 07:49:06 PST Subject: Re: New addy!

Nah!

-W

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To: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-08-2016 21:10:43 PST Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf ((OOC: Sorry for my late reply, been distracted with Dipper and school. Can you send me an updated copy of the Master Doc? The one I have is really out of date; Princess Grenade is missing a bunch of the abilities I know her to have. Plus the List of Lovers is like, half as long as it should be lmaoooo.))

"YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE ME???" roared the werewolf, who's name was actually Steve, "I CAN'T HANDLE ME!!!"

The air filled with the sound of tearing fabric as he tore his pants from his bulging, werewolf legs. They were mostly off already, the transformation had seen to that,  but he knew that he needn't preserve his modesty in front of this royal beauty: her reputation preceded her. Every werewolf in the land knew that one day they may be confronted by the power of her erotic charms and have no choice but to act. And act Steve did, letting his bare body glisten in the moonlight for her and her alone.

"BEHOLD, PRINCESS! A MEMBER THE LIKES OF WHICH YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN!!!"

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-09-0:1:32:36 Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf

((OOC: NO WORRIES!!! I know you've been busy!!!! It was just a CRAPPY place to break the scene, I've been waiting almost TWO WEEKS for this horned up lycan take off his threadbare pants!!! UNF!! Master Doc attached!!))

Princess Grenade drooled, staring disrespectfully at his massive werewolf cock.

File Attachment: PRINCESSGRENADESEXCAPADESAGAMASTERDOC.rtf

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To: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-12-2016 21:10:43 PST Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf

((OOC: Thanks!! Are you still updating the GroogleDoc? Candy says she'll try and draw some art of this scene when we're done. You know she doens't like to work off stuff we haven't finished. She wants the whoooooole enchilada. Says it makes us better writers for it, and I think she's right, you know?))

Massive it was, looming over the Princess like a throbbing baseball bat of love, twitching with desire as he breathed heavily, "THEY USED TO CALL ME STEVE!!!" he growled, taking a threatening step towards Grenade, "BUT I ATE EVERYONE THAT CALLED ME STEVE!!!! AM I STILL STEVE????"

Even in peak arousal; the torment of his stolen humanity was evident. Poor Steve. Will no-one reach out and touch Steve?

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-13-2016 03:11:23 PST Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf

((OOC: TOTALLY!! God, I just feel so bad for Steve, you know? Don't worry, Steve. You can cry it all out after you thrash me with your hog!!!))

 "Steve, STEVE!" Princess Grenade bellowed, holding up her hands, "You really need to CHILL! Of COURSE you're still Steve." She reached out and took his hand-paw in hers, "Deep down inside, you will always be Steve."

Princess Grenade took a deep breath and powered up her level seventeen void throat. //This one's gonna be a DOOZY!!//

Without any fanfare, the busty princess swallowed Werewolf Steve's twitching cock whole, her void throat working overtime to stimulate the needy beast. He yowled. He growled. He made noises that defy description, releasing them into the night as the best throat game in the seven kingdoms worked to free him from his madness.

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To: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-15-2016  20:30:02 PST Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf

((OOC: Level seventeen??? Nice. Nice. Also, Grenda, if you reply to another one of these at 3 am on a school night I won't reply again for a week. We promised we wouldn't let this get away from us like it did last year.))

Steve was no match for the princess; folding into his desires immediately. They had been building so long, long before this encounter had ever happened. He spent his days, even as a normal human being, daydreaming about finally being able to lay his hands on Princess Grenade. To cover her in kisses so tender they bordered on savagery, to short-circuit her over-anxious brain to stop her from thinking too much, to force a physical connection that it would be impossible for her to ignore. As decadent as Grenade's throat void was, he needed something more out of her: ecstasy.

He forcefully pulled Princess Grenade away from him, lifting her by the shoulders. "I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE!!!! I'M COMING TO TAKE IT!!!!"

Taking the princess' enthusiastic whooping as a go-ahead, he threw her to the ground and pinned her with his meaty wolfman body. He paused a moment to rest his snout in the crook of her neck, savoring the way the scent of the dirt under them mixed with her sweat. Not distracted for long, he ripped away her clothes with his claws, careful not to graze her flesh.

There it was. The naked body that had consumed his dreams. A gift and a curse, a nightly visitation by the most perfect thing he had ever seen ... yet was always so painfully out of reach. In his dreams he let that beautiful body consume him, and he consumed it right back, aching and striving to make the face of its owner twist in pleasure so intense it made them forget why they shouldn't be doing this. And, like clockwork, just when it felt like he was finally going to experience the ultimate climax, it was ripped away from him as he joined the waking world. Left to lay there panting in bed, listening to the worst morning DJ in the world make unfuny jokes about subjects that are none of his business. A nightmare more terrifying and tortuous than turning into a monster once every twenty-eight days: unrequited longing.

But it was okay ... this wasn't a dream, and his nightmare was about to end.

Steve descended on Princess Grenade with wolfen fury, satiating himself using her body as the means. Not that her needs were being ignored, quite the opposite in fact, getting her off was getting HIM off, and quickly. He thrust into her with wild abandon, moaning something that might have been her name, but it also might have been a plea for mercy. Before he knew it, his body was being wracked by an orgasm so powerful that it undid his transformation -- but not before he ejaculated dubious ropes of his essence deep into Grenade's womb.

Steve the human, who really wasn't all that handsome actually, panted on top of the princess as he struggled to find his breath. Now that he'd been freed of his curse, at least for the time being, he was sane enough to remember his true mission: Kill Princess Grenade.

He smirked, even though his original plan had been derailed and ruined a good portion of his life, he was still going to look like the smartest person in the world even though it was completely by accident. He was just better than everyone else that way, including the princess who he had just used for his own joy and now was ready to discard like trash just because of a nebulous order from an even more nebulous being that promiesd him nebulous rewards. He reared up, eyes blazing, violence in his heart.

"Aha!" he crowed, triumphant. "I have outsmarted thee, Princess, and I--"

Steve's voice melted into an unsettling squelch as several crossbow bolts pierced his skull, erupting with his useless brain on the other side. His steaming gray matter covered the forest floor, his pathetic body slumping to the dirt as his tainted blood drained from the open wounds in his head. His eyes stared skyward, milky and full of terror, perhaps he realized just before the life left his body that he had truly messed with the wrong princess. Grenade had friends, powerful ones.

"Princess, it is I, the Lady Maybelle." the high-level holy knight stepped from the shadows, her armor gleaming in the moonlight. "I came to find you because I need to talk to you about something.... important. I saw that you were having a bit of fun with a werewolf, so I was just gonna hang around until you finished. But... That man meant to kill you, so I killed him first."

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-17-2016 23:15:26 PST Subject: Re: Princess Grenade and the Lusty Werewolf

((OOC: HOLY SHIT!!!!!! That's a LOT!!! Lemme address some things. 1) I was not "up until" 3am, I happened to wake up to go to the bathroom and saw that you had replied. I got excited and dashed out my reply, I promise I won't do that again in the future. 2)This is literally the hottest thing you have written to date and I hope you're proud of yourself. 3)Unrelated, are you still seeing that therapist your dad set you up with? Just wondering how that's going. 4)I think this reply can count as the endcap on the scene. I'll compile this and send it to Candy so she can put that Bacom Wamboo tablet to WORK!!! 5)If you wanna go ahead and start a new e-mail thread, cool!! Or if you want me to do it just let me know, either way!!))

"HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!" Princess Grenade screamed, wiping dumb man viscera off of her face as she sat up, naked and satisfied. "Wow! Good thing you always have my back, Lady Maybelle! Sounds like you need ME to have yours! What's up??"

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 19:16:01 PST Subject: Hey...

Hey, Pacifica

It's Mabel Pines.

Just wondering how you're doing lately, and I'd like to remind you that you owe me a favor.

XoXo Mabel - To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 19:58:21 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

Wow. Really?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:05:14 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

Yes, really!!

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:14:38 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

I'm fine, thanks. A year from now I'll be settling in at the Ivy Junket school of my choice, and if I manage to get all A's daddy said he'll let me choose a species to knock off the critically endangered list. I'm thinking bonobos, I hate their noses.

What do YOU want from me? Other than my money and attention?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:19:32 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

Bonobos! Sounds ... great!

Have you seen my brother at all lately? If not, can you try and get a look at him?

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:26:38 PST Subject: Re: Hey

No.

Why?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:30:31 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

I just ... want you to check for anything weird!!

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:38:21 PST Subject: Re: Hey

A 17-year-old boy cloistered away in the woods with an eccentric old man that never leaves the house? Nothing weird there. Sounds perfectly normal, actually, especially for you Pines freaks.

You're going to have to be more specific.

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:43:59 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

I really can't be more specific at the moment. He writes to me, but some of the things he's been putting in his letters lately have me pretty worried. I just want to get some eyes on him to make sure he's okay. If you manage to run into him in town, could you try and snap a picture and send it to me? Also: Have you heard any weird whispering from the woods? Seen anything unusual? I mean, unusual for Gravity Falls.

XoXo Mabel

- To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:50:19 PST Subject: Re: Hey I can TRY and get a picture of him??? We don't exactly make a habit of crossing paths, but sometimes I see him out driving. IF I manage to see him I will ATTEMPT to take a picture, but I'm not going out of my way to get it done.

No, no whispers or anything. At least not that I've noticed. I don't tend to make a habit of going near the woods. Don't like the scene, you know? The town seems a bit dour lately, if that counts for anything. Just an icky sort of ... yuck, that's all over the place. Really harshing the homecoming vibes this year. BTW, can you please tell Grenda that if she submits 'Lycan Lovers' as her idea for prom theme one more time that I'm going to have her drawn and quartered? She won't take my calls, for some reason.

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone.

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-19-2016 20:52:31 PST Subject: Re: Hey...

Thank you!!!!

And yeah. I'll tell her.

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-21-2016 16:48:54 PST Subject: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

what color is the werewolf steven's fur??? you never say in the text. i want to make him green, if it is up to me. (๑>؂•̀๑)

btw btw

this one was SO good. you and grenda are so talented. (๑>◡<๑)

-can

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To: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-21-2016 22:01:28 Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

Omg I think green would be amazing, actually. Go with that!

Thanks for the compliment, I've been putting a lot into my writing lately. It's pretty much the only outlet I have, lol.

BTW, have you seen Dipper around town at all?

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-22-2016 16:30:21 PST Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

green it is!!! hehehehehehe

i did not see him recently, no. i did see him over the summer. i made a sketch of what that looked like. (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

-can

File Attachment: dippernopiku.png

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To: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-23-2016 17:22:08 PST Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

I've seen him since the summer, so this isn't really helpful. It's also unhelpful for other reasons.

Can.

Can?

IS THAT AN ORE NO PIKU SCREENCAP REDRAW???

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-24-2016 16:10:13 PST Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

ohohohohohohoho miss mabel (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶), i don't know what you mean? (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ

how do you know what that is?  Don’t you try and goody proctor me! (¬`‸´¬)

-can

File Attachment: dippernopiku-lines.png

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To: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-24-2016 22:51:08 PST Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

Firstly, never mind. Secondly, I'm begging you not to send me the colored version if you do it. Thirdly, how's that werewolf coming along?

...Also, if you see Dipper in town, try and get a close look at him? I'm not sure he's okay. I'm getting worried about him.

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: gigglewiggle@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-25-2016 18:52:49 PST Subject: Re: questionnnnnn ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )

will do! i will be looking for him harder than usual. ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

and here is the latest version of the illustration. ( > 〰 < )♡

-can

File Attachment: werewolfstevenandprincessgrenade.png

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 17:01:13 PST Subject: As you asked...

So, I was trying to take some selfies for Gramsta by the 24-7-365, when guess who I spotted in the parking lot?

Sorry for the filter; I wanted to get the picture as quickly as possible and did NOT want to be like ... obvious about it. I tried to send it in the parking lot but I couldn't get it to go through, so I did it as soon as I got to my home wi-fi.

IMO he's looking a little stressed out. I remember him looking that way most of the time? But it's particularly noticeable; like he's having a reeeeally bad day. The bags under his eyes say he's not sleeping great, either.

That means he's fine, right?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone File Attachment: 09-27-2016-161011.png

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 17:45:20 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

I don't really think so. Thank you for doing this for me.

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:10:38 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

It wasn't any trouble, really.

What do you think is wrong with him?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:17:22 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

I don't know.

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:25:38 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

Are you like, gonna try and find out?

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone

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To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:28:22 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

I don't know!

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf             From: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:36:03 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

Well, if you figure anything out, maybe let me know. Or don't, do whatever you want.

-PNW

Sent from my Fruitphone -

To: 2rich2furious@northwest.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-27-2016 18:38:49 PST Subject: Re: As you asked...

I will.

XoXo Mabel

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To: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf From: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf Date: 09-28-2016 22:55:31 PST Subject: What's Up With Lady Maybelle

((OOC: Candy sent me the updated art and MAN!!! She really knows how to capture the moment. You hadn't sent a new start post so I'm taking initiative. Princess Grenade doesn't want to leave her most treasured friend hanging!!!!))

Princess Grenade walked arm and arm with the Lady Maybelle through the woods. When they were together, nothing could harm them. Their friendship was stronger than any bond, could endure any test, and was the safest place for any and all secrets. The envy of everyone in the land, the equal of none.

"So what's up, Lady Maybelle?" Grenade asked, "You seem really upset. Is everything alright? Obviously not, so, tell me what's not right! Let's make it right!"

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To: boycrazyyyyyyyyyy@gotmail.co.gf From: mabel@mysteryshack.co.gf Date: 09-30-2016  02:13:21 PST Subject: Re: What's Up With Lady Maybelle ((OOC: I had almost forgotten, thank you for sending this starter!!))

Lady Maybelle was quiet for a long time, focusing on the sound that her and the princess' footsteps made on the leaves of the forest floor. There was so much to say, where did she even begin?

"It's really complicated." she finally breathed, "...But it concerns Sir Ursa. I don't see him very much since he opted to stay and train with that shady wizard, and the letters he's been sending me lately have been keeping me up at night. The thing is, there's nothing overtly ... wrong ... with the letters, they're just ... not right. He's not right, and I don't know what to do. I'm worried that something terrible is happening to him, and I'm powerless to stop it."

- TBC in Obsequium Part II!!

[intoloopin-archive]

JJ knows his strengths and how to highlight them so even if he isn't that musically gifted he can still keep up! His upbringing didn't allow him to be anything but a little diva and I love that for him but I wonder how his personality fits into the group.

But your little character breakdown/plot posts are always good!

GIO.

I've been treating this ask like a very fancy bottle of wine, really waiting for the perfect moment to answer it in the most interesting way possible, and now that LOOPiN is FINALLY (!!!) free from New Wave Music and they officially have a new home, I believe a post dissecting how they used to work under Seo CEO's awful control is a must. And here I have the perfect little moment to ramble about it! Which I love!

So, the short answer to your questions is: J.J fits in very badly on a personal level, and most of the other guys consider him unmanageable to say the least, but! LOOPiN as a whole has been so desensitized to Jiahang's (annoying!) personality because, as long as they were under New Wave, they all knew that he was an untouchable constant; both because of his father's grip on the company stock, and because in mid 2021 J.J made the very strategic decision to take active part on backing LOOPiN financially, and he did so by paying for their dorm room accomodations and making that his sole responsability - which is why in some pieces set on their 'flop era' you can notice that their home is just waaaaay too fucking nice.

But yeah, with anyone who's not Minwoo (from late 2020 up until literally a week before he publicly retired from making music), Haegon (often enough) or Hanjae, Jiahang has had very big professional and personal feuds that still linger. It gets ugly sometimes guys, it really does.

Now! To the longer answer!

NEW WAVE MUSIC's LOOPiN & ITS HIDDEN HIERARCHY:

[❗] TWs: corporate abuse, medical neglect.

If in universe iNSYNCs or just people aware of them were to be consulted, they would say that the chain of command and order of company favoritism while LOOPiN were under New Wave Music (2017 - 2023) ended up as:

01. Minwoo; 02. Seungsoo; 03. Haruki; 04. O.z; 05. J.J; 06. Hanjae; 07. Gyujin; 08. Dylan; 09. Taesong; 10. Haegon.

*Former member Lee Beomseok is not included, but just so you know, he wouldn't crack the Top5.

Which, by looking at the graphic you can see it's pretty off! Let's dissect it!

(NOTE: The two white boxes around the Top4 symbolize leadership roles, and they obviously entail the Produce Line, but less obviously, in a ground right above it, stands Minwoo and J.J in a duo that we can informally call as 'LOOPiN's Crisis Management'.)

At the very top of the food chain, we have J.J: As mentioned above, and also said in posts in the past here and there, Jiahang's spot in LOOPiN was 100% bought by his father, but his privilege goes way beyond just sharing surnames with a major sponsor: J.J has an entire personal team of lawyers, a private stylist and his own manager/financial consultant, Han Qiong (39), which puts him miles ahead of everyone else who depended on New Wave's shady and unprepared staff team. Jiahang's influence is also very present in everything on LOOPiN's two last years under New Wave (which came as consequence of him being Minwoo's "apprentice"), but it's all very subtle, as he always hid behind Minwoo to not spoil his incompetent brat persona to CEO Seo Chanhyuk - many marketing stunts, a good parts of their visual identity and even some promoted songs were handpicked by him but signed off as Minwoo's decisions, and even the members don't know that. As of now, speaking of 2023-0T9-Rare-Rhythm-LOOPiN, only Taesong and Haruki are aware of their past almost co-leadership deal and know how frail J.J actually is with this start over on the career department. He has pretty much no idea how and what he should do next now that he doesn't have a clear advantage! A giant really fell!

Minwoo: Even before he took over the official leader position from Taesong in 2021, everyone working with LOOPiN behind the scenes knew Minwoo was the guy in charge: not only was he the frontman of the Produce Line, but not a single decision even outside the group's sound was made without consulting him, mostly because people felt like they should - his... passionate involvement, let's say, about every aspect of the group was very clear. He also kept riding the wave of his Boy Of The Week days as "the golden trainee", and the respect he build in the industry after butting heads with Chanhyuk and his brigade of shareholders to make LOOPiN creative independent, even though it did give everyone consequences - Seo CEO came to HATE his guts right after they debuted, and was a bitch about them just because Minwoo was always just as much of a bitch back. Him making Taesong the leader during their group debut despite Minwoo's obvious crave for that title was just as much of a move made to try to control them as it was petty, childish shit.

O.z: Wu Zhiming is not someone you can restrain, and New Wave Music came to learn that a beat too late; they also didn't know how to fully support him as a music producer, which O.z took no time to notice and start quietly networking his way into opportunities. Now, his music career outside of LOOPiN is the most stable - he's been the major producer and collaborator with Nico, an independent (and faceless!) singer that in universe has internet fame reaching the likes of Pinkpantheress, and he's definely the first member to reach stable international fame, even if it's a tad controversial. And that's something he did despite New Wave Music, and Zhiming has talked about it publicly with no fear, so everyone knows he's truly independent! You go, O.z!

Seungsoo: Seungsoo always has a hard time seeing the bigger picture, and with his career it was no different: he always assumed the Produce Line was an equal triad and even that he was Minwoo's second hand man (which, LMAO. NO!), and he constantly failed to see everyone always respected him the less. But he was and is a group producer, he did have a voice and some control of LOOPiN as a brand, and that automatically puts him above a lot of the members. Seungsoo is also very popular with the public, known as a sweet talker and charming guy, and his music is very sought after for girl groups and female soloists. He was not doing the worst.

Gyujin: Gyujin, the newest loop dude of them all, stands right in the middle. He joined LOOPiN at a crazy time, but he is flexible by nature and he worked himself into the public's good graces very quickly, all on his own; it barely took him 7 months to be iNSYNC's new darling dearest, which did give some brownie points with Seo CEO at the time. Gyujin is also very familiar with the entertainment industry, which barely changed in the years he spend retired from child acting, so he knew from the get go what to watch out for. His contract signing took 3 weeks because he kept going for legal tweaks, something that immediately set off warning sirens inside Seo CEO's head, but at that point, Gyujin was all he had to try to set off the fire of Beomseok's departure - and many other accusations! If he had more time inside the company, Gyujin could definely pull a J.J and find something to use to his advantage against Chanhyuk, because if there's one thing he'll always do, is find an angle.

Hanjae: As soon as Sangwon got out of the picture as LOOPiN's manager in early 2022, Hanjae found himself in a very interesting position, that being his elevation from someone that was literally hidden for two years inside their own group to a hotshot debutee actor - fully backed by Chanhyuk, who was so fucking tired of LOOPiN having collective fame at this point. As we know, Hanjae's crush on Haruki was old and a well known fact inside New Wave, and it ended up causing his professional downfall; Sangwon mismanaged him on porpouse in LOOPiN's early years to not only punish him for his feelings, but also just to torment Haruki. Recently, Seo CEO has committed the big mistake of trying to convince Hanjae to sell his exclusive contract to an acting agency on New Wave's last days, and despite Hanjae double crossing him and immediately telling everyone about the company's hidden fate back in January so they could prepare for it, Chanhyuk still planted a lot of doubt on Hanjae's mind about his Idol future, and that will be at play very soon, thanks to 'Kick It' winning the comeback poll! So stay tunned!;

Taesong: As said on the Minwoo section, Taesong's role as LOOPiN's leader was given to him because Seo CEO needed someone in charge to be under his thumb, and Taesong filled that role okay enough for as long as he could - Minwoo's very harsh criticism of his every move plus everyone's lack of respect of the sentimental way he used to run things eventually got to him mentally. He had many hiatuses in his career, and with each new one came more of a lack of interest from New Wave Music in him as a way of income. If it wasn't for his own volution and need to get better, Taesong wouldn't be the vocal powerhouse he is now - he payed for his own vocal coaches, all non affiliate with the company! By the time he returned from his most serious and longest hiatus in early 2021, making the (not so willing) decision to give out the leader position to Minwoo, all without notifying Seo CEO first, made him public enemy number #2, and it definitely showed on his sudden erasure of schedules.

Haegon: From pretty much day one, Haegon was not taken seriously by anyone inside New Wave Music as an Idol or person, specially in Seo Chanhyuk's eyes: his very unsettling attachment to former member Beomseok paired with his short temper painted him as a kid unwilling to grow up, and when Beomseok left and Haegon put up a whole dissapearing stunt for a week (he had to be fake announced to be put on hiatus!), any slight interest or patience Seo Chanhyuk had for him died. Dare I say, Seo CEO saw Haegon as his biggest signing mistakes, when you take into consideration that "he wasn't even good enough to make the main vocalist stay" - his own words! So Haegon was not encouraged to train beyond his habilities or given any sort of solo schedules. Haegon himself felt the company's disbelief in him in his bones, too, and found it hard to try.

Haruki: Despite being made the public face of LOOPiN from 2021 and onwards, and eventually starting as a model with a lot of company apparent support (big highlight on apparent), Haruki was not the target of favoritism in the slightest; it was the very opposite. None of the investment made by New Wave towards Haruki was genuine, made to be long term or took what he wanted to do as an artist into consideration. It was just Seo CEO buying his silence about his horrible involvement with Sangwon without explicitly saying to Haruki that he was buying his silence. Haruki also never had freedom of movement from the moment he became a Week Boy, and even small decisions he had the impression of being made without Sangwon's involvement over the years always ended up with his involvement despite his demands for the contrary, because Seo CEO did not care or respect him, ever. (Which is in my humble opinion one of his worst crimes: knowing and doing nothing for a share price. Fuck that man, honestly, fuck him.)

And in the lowest of lows, Dylan: In the old blog I had a piece that was fully narrated by Chihoon, and in it we caught a glimpse of the situation with his private contract under New Wave Music and by extension, Blockberry Creative; how his trainee dept was thrice everyone's size because he lost a private defamation lawsuit against both companies back when he was on Boy Of The Week, plus one claiming neglect from Seo CEO directly. Dylan's contract as a whole was barely legal and made by a lawyer that was at the time Seo CEO's wife-to-be (🥴), and the disparity definely showed as LOOPiN went on. Mind you: his first ever solo project (given how he did not promote his debut track 'Monster' or 'Teenager' with LOOPiN Look(a)Like due to an hospitalization), was his rebellion album released in 2022, and that obviously had no company support. Dylan also was on the down low obligated to see a 'company psychiatrist', something that is exclusive to him and was as shady as it fucking sounds - a lot of his growing paranoia as his career goes on it's not only caused by the things he becomes a witness to, but also the bad intentioned changes made in his medication.

[magixfairyix]

Darcy's Magic & Magic Theory

Table of Contents:

01: Magic Signature

02: Planet Signature

03: Mental Signature

04: Darcy & Lilith's Magic

05: Psychic Magic

06: Dark Magic

07: Pos/Neg Effects

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Magic Signature: Her magic signature (information about the different signatures is available here) is her unique magic of both psychic and dark magic, and although her magic itself is Lilith's, the magic, the way Darcy uses it, and that combined with her energy as a person contributes to her magic signature

In my mind, her magic signature would show obvious dark and psychic magic, along with bringing a small feeling of foreboding (a fleeting one that you may not catch) if you walk past her or something.

This is also the reason in my mind how Musa in season 2 was able to recognize Darcy during the Trix's first attack at Red Fountain, as both magic users who who the music and psychic element can more easily pick up on magical signatures as they all operate on the same frequency of theta waves (the brainwave present during meditation, hypnosis, and music can interact with the different types of brain waves including this one).

When your brain is in the theta wave state (at least according to Google and from what I remember from classes) you are more connected to your subconscious and can pick up on energies and insights.

Different magical signatures (not just the magic signature) would normally be in this state, and for one's magic to operate on the same wavelength as them makes it easier to pick up on them. Darcy can easily pick up on different magical signatures as they operate on the same wavelength as her psychic magic.

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Planet Signature:

"The energy that all things in the magic dimension have, and it comes from the planet they were born form. Plants, faries, witches, specialists, you name it.

One's planet signature gives them enough to manifest a spell but not cast a spell. Casting is giving a spell a clear physical cause and form, while manifesting is willing it into existence."

Darcy's planet signature comes from her planet in my backstory for her: Zenothe (more information in the linked post). It is the previously dead planet where a lot of witches went after being turned away when dark magic and therefore them started appearing. Most of the original witches on Zenothe came from Domino, and they brought a small spark of a flame from Domino (not the Dragon Flame obs, which's connected to the Dominion bloodline) and it merged with the dark/dead/barely existing planet signature of Zenothe to create a dark flame of sorts.

Darcy's planet signature is that of Zenothe, and is identical to other witches from Zenothe who were born there and didn't come to Zenothe from another planet.

This is why she was able to channel a dark flame to burn Alfea's library in season three, the episode where Musa gained Enchantix.

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Mental Signature:

"So a mental signature is the natural energy your thoughts, memories, and mental process give off. If you're calm and think things through your mental signature will reveal that, and if you're a bigot and your thoughts show that, your mental signature will show that as well."

Darcy has a naturally strong mental signature due to her affinity for psychic magic, and it is very easy for her to recognize other mental signatures due to her magic as well. It is clear if someone detects her mental signature that she uses the psychic element, due to the amount of magic that is focused in her mind.

More scientifically, the brain. Magic is in one's blood and flows as such, though psychic magic is found and would be located in the veins and arteries in one's brain.

Thoughts, as mentioned in the post about magical signatures, also influence one's mental signature. By this logic, Darcy's mental signature would make it clear that she is a witch (with how witches use negative emotions to fuel their magic), the emotion she most frequently uses if the one detecting her mental signature is skilled enough (being a need for control to fuel her psychic magic, and the emotion of apathy to fuel her dark magic, more information about how emotions fuel magic here), her usually calm and collected attitude, etc.

In one word, her mental signature would be collected and chaotic, as her mental signature is a collection of all her emotions, thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs. As in control of herself, as she is, her mental signature is one caught of off guard when reading it (though her psychic magic naturally protects her mind from being read by these means, at least if the person doesn't put in the magical effort to) would be chaotic.

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Darcy & Liltith's Magic:

"Darcy's was quite remarkable. Quite a few of the witches on Zenothe were known for getting their magic from Lilith, though only the shadow side of Lilith's magic was expressed in these few witches (this was purposefully from the witch's side, not wanting to give her power to someone/multiple people she couldn't control). Lilith decided to give her psychic magic slowly, saving most of the magic for last.

Though Lilith's psychic magic is strong, and Darcy was a child, and not a lot of people on her planet knew how to deal with it. She had a neighbour or two who came from other planets with psychic magic who tried to help her deal with it and train her, but it was too much magic too quickly. It was painful."

(More information about the above here)

Darcy naturally had an affinity for dark magic (illusion magic, shadow magic, transportation, all of that), similarly to some others on her planet that got their magic from Lilith. That was the magic she was born with, and the magic she was used to.

Lilith was able to channel psychic magic (the second magic the Ancestral Witch has control over) to Darcy due to that, due to a similarity in magic. Darcy slowly began to get headaches and migraines, as having psychic magic in one's brain is jarring if brought into someone's self too quickly as Lilith had done.

The brain of course controls a lot of the body, and so having new magic in there that wasn't there before impacted Darcy physically. She would have been fine if Lilith channelled only a small amount of psychic magic and left it to naturally develop, or if the psychic magic was introduced slowly over a long period. However this was not the case.

Darcy frequently suffered from insomnia (due to the parts of her brain controlling her circadian rhythm being messed up), headaches, and forgetting memories only to recall them the next day. Until she fully got her psychic magic, and she learned to control it.

These negative side effects of magic do not normally happen if one's body is used to the magic, because the psychic magic would learn to regulate itself on its own.

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Psychic Magic: In order to properly and skillfully use psychic magic, one has to have very deep knowledge of how the brain works, its parts, and its different processes. As well as how the conscious, subconscious, and unconscious works. So Darcy is very well versed in the anatomy of the brain and psychology in order to use her magic as well as she can.

Mind Reading:

~ Mind reading works by the user mimicking the brain waves being emitted by the individual whose thoughts they want to read, so that the individual's thoughts are able to move along from the individual into what is known as the "psychic space," which is the distance between the mind reader and the individual. The thoughts then reach the mind reader.

~ Mind reading can work with both the conscious thoughts; the subconscious, thoughts that are not directly in one's awareness but can be recalled; and the unconscious, 'repressed thoughts' that an individual is not aware of. The mind reader just needs to mimic different brain waves depending on such.

~ Mimicking brain waves for this and other abilities is needed so that the target does not realize what is going on and cannot put up defences.

Psychic Linking:

~ Psychic linking is when a psychic magic user links their mind and someone else's across the "psychic space" in a way that is semi-permanent until it is broken off by one of the individuals. This form of a connection across the "psychic space" requires less than the normal amount of effort among the linked individuals to do things such as communicating telepathically, and makes it easy to do so across long distances where it takes a lot of effort and energy to communicate telepathically to read someone's mind.

Mind Control:

~ Mind control is when a psychic magic user controls an individual's conscious thoughts and actions, though this does not require that the individual's conscious thoughts are completely buried/nullified. To mind control someone, one would have to control the person's brain to control the individual's movement, speech, and expressions simultaneously; so temporarily invading an individual's mind through a process similar to mind reading in practical for this, though more deeply ingrained and more invasive than typical mind reading processes.

Telekinesis:

~ Projecting psychic energy across the "psychic space" to the planet signature (one of the three magical signatures) of an object. Everything from the magical dimension has a planet signature, and as such can be controlled by psychic energy that merges the psychic energy into the planet signature.

Clairvoyance:

~ Clairvoyance is the act of seeing events before they happen. To do this one has to open their natural psychic protections up to everything around them while focusing on the thought of what they are looking for specifically. It is a very chaotic and draining process, and Darcy does not use this ability of hers due to it feeling similar to the lack of control she had over her psychic magic when she was a child.

Mental Manipulation:

~ Mental manipulation is the overall manipulation over the physical brain and does not include interacting across the "psychic space." Once again, one has to have a good understanding of the structure of the brain and psychology to do this. Every being that can think has a mental signature (not as strong as those with psychic magic, but they do) and that can be manipulated as such, as the mental signature, like psychic magic, is located in the veins and arteries of the brain. A small (like a speck) amount of psychic magic in everyone's mind so they have awareness, and was given to them by the Great Dragon. Control of this speck for psychic magic users is the same as Bloom manipulating a candle, and once again, reaching across the "psychic space" is not needed and is not recommended, as it can lead to one feeling the same effects of the mental manipulation as the target.

~ Actions related to mental manipulation are, for example: messing with someone's pain reflex to put them in agony, making them hallucinate, feel nauseous, collapse and lose consciousness (this takes a lot of energy and is impractical), making them sleep better or worse, making them lose sight by blocking off their ocular nerve, and other things of the like.

Psychic Healing:

~ Psychic healing falls under the category of mental manipulation and is completed by a psychic magic user manipulating an individual's brain to send more white blood cells/blood/healing stuff to the wound. This is different than time reversal healing, or Bloom's Dragon Flame healing which removes all impurities from the body and gives pure life energy.

Telepathy:

~ Temporarily cementing the "psychic space" between two individuals and sending one's thoughts between them, and this process is easier if the thoughts are in similar brain waves. As such, it is hard to communicate telepathically with someone if one person is stressed and the other is not, though this difficulty does not exist if the two minds are linked through psychic linking as described above.

Self-Manipulation:

~ Basically manipulating your own mind to do certain things such as sleeping better, or becoming calmer. Though this is both difficult to do, and can lead to permanent damage. This is because when manipulating someone else's mind, they recover and the manipulation is temporary due to distance from the psychic magic user. If one manipulates their own mind there is no distance, and it is permanent. Darcy does not go into this part of her magic cause she's not an idiot, and although she knows what she's doing, she's not going to risk anything.

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Dark Magic: Dark magic (otherwise known as dark arts) encapsulates control over shadows and illusion magic. Moon magic does not fall under this category. Also, deception magic of illusions can be expressed in individuals separate from dark arts, though those who have dark magic have both shadows and illusion magic, and the two cannot be separated and are one singular element.

Teleportation:

~ It works if the magic user knows the area well, and cannot be done through inter-planet travel (where an item such as Stella's scepture, or a portal is required). One has to clearly picture where they want to transport to (the more clear, the more reliable the transportation is) and let their being move into the "dimensional space" (Point at the air in front of you. That's dimensional space. Any space that's not occupied with an object/by a planet signature that all objects have is part of the dimensional space) not as a physical form and becoming only all three of one's magical signatures at once, and to where they want to go, before regaining physicality.

Shadow Transmutation:

~ Reach out with dark magic. Shadow with similar energy. Control it, move it, bop it, shake it. The more complicated the shape of the transmutation and the bigger it is, the more energy it takes for the magic user in order to control it.

Illusions:

~ Basically filling the "dimensional space" with shadows that are on an atomic level and reforming them to give them a physical form, that can be controlled like in shadow transmutation, though it takes focus to control every aspect of its movement along with filling the "dimensional space." It takes less energy but more focus than shadow transmutation. Illusions are always physical and are often confused with holographic projection, which is an easier process.

Holographic Projection:

~ Filling the "dimensional space" with a duplication of an already existing image. This is not physical and only visual, those these holographic projections could be audible if the original image speaks. Makes shadows on an atomic form mimic an image by giving them a role, and letting them copy that image as such without needing constant control. Basically, illusions in a way, except they take less focus, is not physical, and are more practical during combat

Invisibility:

~ Filling the "dimensional space" around oneself with shadow magic and warping its appearance to fit that of one's surroundings. It uses the same and identical process are holographic projection where the atoms of shadow magic are given a role and does not need constant control to maintain said role. It is easy to stay invisible while using other spells because of this.

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Pos/Neg Effects:

~ Some of the positive effects Darcy has because of both her dark and psychic magic is: she can tell time (like Stella) by looking at the sky but especially during nighttime while Stella's ability works better in the day, she can read people very well in terms of their tone and body language, she naturally feels calmer in dimmer conditions

~ Some of the negative effects Darcy has: if she is in extremely bright conditions (normal daylight is fine) it is very unpleasant, with psychic magic it is necessary that one does not burry any trauma or unpleasantries so she has to address things in order to properly use her magic to its fullest level

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Not an expert in psych. Have taken classes on it and double-checked with google, so please correct me if I got something wrong.

But also trying to make sense of a fictional universe is painful as hell.

[duhragonball]

Neon Genesis Evangelion 09

Okay, okay! I'll tell you all about it. You might want to sit down first. This will take a few minutes...

Last time, Asuka arrived in Japan to serve as the latest Eva pilot. She's already the most popular girl in school, and for some reason Suzuharu and Big Rigg Mahoney have started taking photos of her and selling them to her admirers. Well, the reason is money, obviously. That, and just being little shits.

Asuka seems to revel in the attention, but only because she feels entitled to it. She finds the other pilot, Rei, and introduces herself. Rei isn't particularly impressed.

Asuka wants to be friends, and Rei asks why, then says she'll do it if ordered by their superiors at NERV. Cold.

Oh, hey, remember Kaji? That asshole from the previous episode? The one who ditched the others and delivered that mysterious package to Gendo Ikari? Well, he's staying at the base for some reason. He seems to want to re-start his romance with Misato, but that doesn't stop him from just groping Ritsuko like they've been married for a year. Fuck Kaji, is what I'm trying to say.

Moving on, the real story of this episode is another Angel attack. This is the seventh one overall, and the fifth we've seen since the series started. Like the fifth Angel, this one is headed straight for the NERV base, but they're still reeling from that battle, so they can't afford to let it get that close. Instead, Misato deploys Units 01 and 02 to the shoreline, where they'll intercept the Angel as it makes landfall. If they can double-team the thing, they should be able to overwhelm it before it gets a chance to do anything.

That's the plan, anyway, but Asuka has her own plan, since she wants to make a big debut in Unit 02. She jumps into the surf and cuts the angel in half. Good job, except...

It splits into two monsters and continues attacking. Whoops!

We skip ahead to some time after the battle, but the photos tell the story. NERV was completely humiliated, because they had to call the UN for support. The UN dropped an "N2 mine" on the Angel to halt its advance. This is the same weapon used on the Third Angel from Episode 1. I should note that it didn't work at all in Episode 1, so I don't understand why it helps now. Each new Angel seems to be more powerful than the last, and this one defeated two Evas, which is unprecedented.

The UN's attack managed to burn off 28% of its mass, which temporarily incapacitated it, but it's only a matter of time before it regenerates and picks up where it left off. Okay, I guess that's fair, since the Third Angel needed to regenerate after getting N2'ed, but it didn't take very long. This one needs about a week.

Being, you know, literal children, Asuka and Shinji fail to learn anything from this debacle. Asuka defied orders and went into business for herself, but Shinji just stood there and watched like a dope. Maybe if he had taken some initiative and supported her play, they might have been able to make something work, but he always does as he's told. And this is a problem, because the two of them will have to fight the Angel all over again when it recovers, so they need to be on the same page.

I don't know why Kaji's even in this briefing. He observes that the UN strike bought them time to regroup, and "you can't ask for more than that," which is the stupidest thing anyone says in this conference, which includes bickering from literal children. Yes, Kaji, we can ask for more than this. The whole point of this meeting is to ask the Eva pilots to get their shit together and win the battle in a single engagement.

Another entry in my Kaji Sucks file: I hate this shot of him talking to Asuka. I hate that stupid look on his stupid face, I hate how Asuka has a crush on his useless ass. I hate his clip-on tie, which might be an animation error but it looks stupid either way. In this moment I'm rooting for the Angel to destroy the NERV base just to ensure he dies along with everyone else.

Kaji does have a suggestion to get the kids ready for the rematch, but he can't just say it in the meeting, he has to write it down on a computer file and give it to Ritsuko to give it to Misato, because fuck this guy.

Later, Shinji comes home to Misato's apartment and finds Asuka has moved in. She claims that she's taking Shinji's place, although she'd rather live with Kaji. I'm sure he'd love that too. Kaji is the worst.

Asuka gripes about how small the place is and wonders why all the doors in Japan have no locks, and then Misato shows up to explain that the Japanese way is to "consider the priorities and needs of others before one's own." Right, no other culture ever thought of that before Japan came along, Misato. And what does that have to do with the doors not having locks? If that made any sense, then why does the front door have a lock?

So what is the point of all this? Well, Misato explains that this was Kaji's idea: Shinji and Asuka will spend the next six days living together and doing everything in unison, in order to practice synchronizing their attacks when they face the Angel in six days. They both hate this idea, but there's no time for anything else.

This does not go well, mostly because Asuka is too proud to go along with it. This exercise with the Twister/DDR game is a failure, so Misato asks Rei to give it a try and she syncs up perfectly with Shinji's movements. So why not just have Rei and Shinji tag up for the battle? I mean, they worked well together a while back? It's a proven formula. Rei's Eva doesn't have weapons, but I'm pretty sure they can reconfigure 02 for Rei quickly enough.

So it's the Fusion Reborn plot, but with Asuka in the Vegeta role. She can either fight alongside Shinji, or she can ride the pine. This makes her upset, and her dumb friend tells Shinji to go talk to her because "he made her cry", but by the time he catches up with her she's already worked this out. She'll do the training.

And there's a training montage, and they succeed! I don't quite understand how this tranlates to Eva piloting, but at least they can stand to work together, which has to be an improvement.

Maybe it works a little too well. They sleep in separate rooms, of course, but one night Asuka gets up to use the toilet, then plops down in the wrong futon. There's a tense moment where Shinji's worried that his cassette player will wake her up, but it doesn't. She just lays there and murmurs the word "mama". He almost kisses her, but then he thinks better of it and sleeps on the floor.

Lips in anime are the worst. They always draw these characters with teeny-tiny mouths, which isn't a huge problem until they try to do a scene like this, where Shinji stares at a closeup of Asuka's lips, which look ridiculous because it's so badly misproportioned. He's trying to move in closer to kiss her except their heads are so weird that the pose ends up looking awkward.

I guess it doesn't matter, since he bails out at the last second, bitterly muttering that Asuka is "just a child". I'm not sure how to interpret that, but whatever.

Speaking of awkward kissing, Kaji makes out with Misato in the elevator. When they get to her floor, she steps out and tells him this is a mistake, and he replies with some bullshit about her words saying "no", but her lips saying "yes". Fuck this guy.

Later, she confides in Ritsuko that their relationship, which ended eight years ago, was "the biggest blemish" on her life. I'm curious to see why that would be, but that probably won't get paid off for a while.

Anyway, the big fight happens, and Shinji and Asuka execute the plan perfectly. This time they let the Angel come to them, but they cut their power cables and fight with the one minute of battery life they have. They cut the thing in half like before, then whale on the two halves before finally doing this double divekick move to destroy the Angel's core to end the battle.

The resulting explosion does leave the Evas in an undignified pose, but a win is a win.

This dude is embarrassed, but I didn't see him do a damn thing the whole time. He doesn't even have a name. I mean, they put his bio in the DVD extra features, but why should I care what they call him if they never say his name in the show? He usually just stands behind Gendo and tries to look important. Well fuck him. I'm calling him Clownshoes from now on.

And that's it. I guess this episode was good enough, but I'm not sure about the dynamic Asuka adds to the cast. She's at least active, which is more than I can say for Rei or Shinji, but a lot of time is spent just getting Asuka to do simple teamwork like "cooperating" or "facing reality". Even the NERV staff are getting frustrated about having to work with children, even though the Evangelion program seems to depend upon it for some reason.

In the end, that's just what the show is about, so I can't complain that it nails the depiction of putting children behind the wheel of a super-weapon. It's either a power fantasy or a nightmare, depending on your point of view, and this show tackles that pretty damn well.

[octuscle]

Roman holiday

Max had been given a tour of Germany by his German-born grandmother as a graduation present. He flew to Frankfurt and was to travel from there through the Rhine Valley to Cologne. From there it went on to Hamburg, Berlin, Dresden and to Munich. At the end, a week of skiing in the Austrian Alps was planned.

Max liked the first stop, Frankfurt, very much. Thanks to the generosity of his grandmother, he stayed in an excellent hotel. And after the first evening, he had made friends with the handsome bartender. Max had once been quite athletic, but during his studies, sports had suffered. So it did him good to be able to flirt despite his belly.

Two days before leaving for Cologne, Max went over his travel plans again at the bar. He barely understood a word of German, and he didn't really understand the confirmation of the hotel located directly on the Rhine. He held out his cell phone to the bartender and asked if he could explain to him what was in the booking confirmation and, above all, why the nights were so insanely expensive. Max was paying more than double what he usually had to pay on his tour of Germany. "Guy, are you seriously asking me that?" the bartender replied. "I thought you were going to Cologne specifically for Carnival. Very different from New Orleans or Rio, but the biggest party Germany. And your hotel booking includes admission to one of the hottest costume balls." The bartender pulled out his cell phone and showed Max a few photos from his last trip to Cologne Carnival. "I'm really jealous. There are some really hot lads in town that weekend. You're going to have your fun. Do you have a costume yet?" Max replied in the negative and the bartender played with his cell phone a bit. "Here, what do you think of this? Roman Legionnaire. Cologne is a Roman foundation, so that fits. And you'll look hot in that costume!".

The price was really reasonable, Max accepted and the bartender ordered directly with delivery to Max's Cologne hotel.

When Max arrived at his Cologne hotel on Saturday afternoon, there was already a party atmosphere. The foyer was decorated and hardly a guest was walking around without a costume. Max checked in and was informed that his package was already in his room and that the costume ball would start at 7:11 pm. "Strange time," Max thought to himself. But this was a weird town, too. Max moved into his room, unpacked his suitcase and then opened the package. Shit, that wasn't the costume he ordered. This one looked more elaborate. But it also showed much more skin. Too much skin for Max's taste. Max tried to combine the costume with a t-shirt, but that looked even goofier. Well, thanks to the helmet, no one would be able to recognize him. And he wouldn't be at the party for long anyway.

At 7:30 p.m. Max put on the cape and headed for the elevator. In the hotel hallway, he was met by several other guests in a party mood. Almost everyone stared at him or turned to look at him. In front of the elevator, the stares of the other guests made him almost uncomfortable. Then the elevator doors opened. And Max stared at his reflection. He was no longer Max. He was Maximus!

What a party…! It was 02:00 in the morning and Max needed a cigarette. His transformation had been complete for a long time. He had gained several more pounds of muscle. And his costume had also changed. Instead of plastic, it was now made of high-quality leather. And his cape was no longer made of polyester but of a heavy loden fabric. Max stepped in front of the hotel, where hundreds of people were smoking and drinking. He took off his heavy metal helmet and asked the muscular Viking next to him if he could have a cigarette. "A kiss first, Centurion," was the reply. The crowd roared as Roman and barbarian stuck their tongues deep down each other's throats. Carnival had just begun. And promised to be a lot more fun.

@axeegliter, always a pleasure to accept your challenges!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

James Acaster stood in for John Robins, alongside Elis James, for a couple of radio episodes in February 2018, while John off touring The Darkness of Robins, and of course James was very good. There were lots of funny bits, everyone should go listen to the episodes of you want to hear James Acaster actually be funny, it's episodes 208 and 209 of the Radio X years. However, I had three things I wanted to comment on that have nothing to do with the actual jokes.

1) They discussed whether James Acaster is ginger, which I appreciate, because that has always confused me. Or at least, it's confused me since I first got on Tumblr, which was not long after I first saw Taskmaster, and saw the blond boy from season 7 referred to as a ginger. I've never brought it up because I just thought I guess i'm not very good at identifying hair colours, but I always found it strange. Which is why I pleased that, during this radio episode, they mentioned the idea of James Acaster being ginger, and James said that people call him ginger sometimes, but he's always thought he was blond. I am pleased that, at least, I am not the only one who's found this confusing.

But then, I watched the first nine seasons of Taskmaster before going on Tumblr and thought of Alex Horne as having brown hair, and then I saw people call him ginger on here, and I went back and looked at pictures of him, and yes, he's definitely ginger, I just didn't notice. I think I sometimes just don't notice when people are ginger. But I've looked at James Acaster again and I still don't think he is. Also, I'm now remembering that in early episodes of The Last Leg they used to call Josh Widdicombe ginger, and he's less ginger and more purely blond than anyone mentioned in this post so far, including Elis James.

I mean, I do see the colour red. The first time I watched Mock the Week I got that Frankie Boyle has red hair. But I do not understand how people look at James Acaster and see ginger. Glad that's been addressed and he's on my side.

2) Elis James and James Acaster dedicated some of the episode to making fun of John Robins for being on a tour with his highly emotional stand-up hour, featuring what Elis enjoys calling "the cynical inclusion of emotional heft" (citing an Edinburgh review that praised the "emotional heft", but the word cynical was added by Elis). This is fair enough, I happen to like a good stand-up hour with some emotional heft, I think something can be curated for the speaker's personal benefit while also being grounded in genuine emotional weight and I think The Darkness of Robins is one of many examples of that, but also, I'm aware that there's something inherently cynical in turning emotional heft into a project for monetary profit and awards. No problem with Elis making jokes about that. I've heard Elis James' stand-up routines, it is definitely internally consistent for him to make fun of other people for doing comedy with meaningful emotional subject matter. Absolutely nothing in Elis' catalogue makes him a hypocrite for mocking that. However, it was pretty amusing to listen to James Acaster make fun of something for doing that. Especially as this was just a couple of months before James started performing the earliest WIPs of Cold Lasagne, a show at least partly inspired by a breakup he had, I think, the same week as John Robins' breakup that formed the basis of Darkness of Robins. James Acaster may have just been annoyed that someone else got there first and won a Perrier Award for it, before he thought to do a show about that.

3) In honour of James Acaster back on Radio X, they did one more Classic Scrape.

After I heard this bit, I looked up when Comedy Unleashed started, it was, in fact, February 2018. So I'm pleased about this. According to Nish Kumar recently, James Acaster thinks it's going a bit far to yell at Jimmy Carr at a comedy festival just for appearing on Jordan Peterson's podcast. And maybe James is right, even though Nish has my eternal respect for being a person who didn't listen to reason on that. So I enjoy hearing a story in which James Acaster is the one picking a fight over people doing shitty things. Some people are all right.

[memberment]

Good evening

Guys I just got home from work and proofread everything I needed to including this next Dandelion chapter and I'm trying so hard not to just fucking SOB over it.

I hate it here I want out LMFAOOOOOOO THIS IS SO SAD WHY DID I WRITE THIS FR

10:59 update......

I'm thinking about an absolutely diabolical twist for the Trin series(it doesn't actually change the story in any way, if anything it actually makes it make so much more sense). Like, I've been ruminating on it since last night but idk if it's gonna throw people off. But at the same time like part twos and threes never do as good anyways so do I really even care?? Like, I'm just out here telling stories in fanfic font bc I would rather throw myself in the street than make OCs and not share my fun little stories.

I think I may commit to it.

I don't wanna say it on here though bc it's one of those plot twists you get will not forget even though part three is like FOREVER out.

The more I think about it the more I wanna do it. Someone tell me I should do it.

Oh my god I am shutting up and finishing reading Dandelion, y'all will hear my virtual screams in approximately one and a half business hours.

(11:43) I'm actually fucking sobbing and I didn't even start the last few chapters. Like, I'm actually crying over this. It's not funny.

(12:00) Never by mag lo coming on while I'm finishing up reading this is not funny. I'm devastated. I hope you all hate me after this oh my god I feel like I just ruined my own life. WHY IS IT SO MUCH WORSE AFTER BEING DONE WITH THIS FIC FOR ALMOST TWO MONTHS. Jesus Christ. Yeah. No more angst from me for a long while. I'm banned.

(12:20) Me skimming through tags on fics debating if I want to pick up something new. Everything being totally normal. Suh happy. Trying not to stew in my own misery. And then I see such a vile tag my stomach twists and now I'm just like okay I'll go fuck myself I guess I'll go write or do my homework. I'm sorry, I adore ao3 and I'm never gonna be a hater, BUT SOME PEOPLE ARE WILD. LIKE I AM TALKING SO BAD I'M ACTUALLY CONSIDERING DOING MY HOMEWORK OVER THAT. LIKE I ACTUALLY JUST WIPED THE TEARS OFF MY FACE AND GOT OVER HOW SAD I WAS BECAUSE OF HOW GENUINELY SHOCKED I WAS. Like wow oh wow.

Anyways. Updates here if there's gonna be any. Also Dandelions up if anyones reading this LMAO

It's 1:40 in the morning and the beginning of Morning Glory is making me fucking unwell. I was not joking when I made that joke about like ten dreaded weeks of angst, Jesus Christ.

(2:12) This is my second time posting this exact part. Like I know I've posted this exact part. But I seriously love Christophe and all of his dialogue with my whole heart.

(4:31) I do not recall making Dova this tragic and I'm literally about to sob over him. LIKE WHY???? WHY DID I DO THAT??? WHY ARE HIS LITTLE SUBTLE BITS OF STORYLINE SO ACTUALLY PAINFUL AS THE STORY GOES ON????? (I am allergic to happiness I am my own canon event at this point)

(4:48) THE ABSOLUTE DEVASTATION THAT COMES WITH WANTING MORE STORY BUT IT SIMPLY NOT EXISTING BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO WRITE IT IS DEVASTATING.

(5:02) Welp. I'm ruined and am now compelled by god to start working on Morning Glory again. We're at 73k rn. And only two chapters that aren't the prologue are under 4k. That's fucking terrifying. Like I have 17 minus the prologue rn. WE ARE LITERALLY THREE CHAPTERS AWAY FROM THE FOURTH OF JULY. THERE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ANOTHER 16/17 OF SUMMER ALONE. AND THERE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AT LEAST ANOTHER 14 AFTER THAT. LIKE THE 14 ARE THE PLANNED SPECIFIC EVENT CHAPTERS. BRUH. WHY DID I DO THIS????

regret.

regret is all I feel.

but I will push through.

(7:38) before I go to bed I will just say I am at 75.3k. I had no idea how I would even get close to 4k on a birthday chapter where the group effectively decided to just stay home and hang out. But now there is like 1.5k of them playing muffin time. It's wild. I love it. GOOD NIGHT.