#(^ that goes for music in general lol)
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Redrawing a thing I drew a million years ago (x)
#yes. i am rewatching spn. and i want to take dean winchesters head between my hands and crush his skull#babygirl i will fucking destroy u. for the love of god someone hug him until he shuts the fuck up#its the misogyny of the characters and the early 2000s writing in general. and the cringe dialog. but ya kno#also HOLY FUCK the music replacement#@iguanodonwildman u were not fucking kidding its devastating XD its so bad. but im having fun lol#listen... dean winchester is just a babygirl in my mind but also i wanna watch someone beat the tar out of him... actually that goes for#most of my favorite characters. maybe thats just a me thing#supernatural#spn#dean winchester#castiel#destiel#fanart
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"WONDERFUL SHOW TONIGHT, FORREST."
a KILLER FREQUENCY Marie Campbell/Forrest Nash ship playlist on YT
"Good to talk to you again, Forrest. You know, I've really enjoyed our chats tonight." "I guess we've had some moments."
Tracklist under the cut
Is Everybody Going Crazy? - Nothing But Thieves / The Perfect Girl - Mareux / We Don't Have To Dance - Andy Black / Night Issues (Nightcall x Daddy Issues) Mashup/Remix - FuturePastPerson / "Bassically" - Tei Shi / Cold Summer - Mareux / Diet Mountain Dew - Lana Del Rey / Destruction Of Us - Mr.Kitty / Teeth - 5 Seconds of Summer / HUSH - Ari Abdul / DTLA - Mareux / Make You Mine - Madison Beer / FEAR YOU - Kat Von D / Bad Romance - Lady Gaga / Dark All Day - GUNSHIP / Maniac (feat. Conor Mason of Nothing But Thieves) - AWOLNATION
#killer frequency#marie campbell#forrest nash#slashers#marie/forrest (killer frequency)#forrest/marie (killer frequency)#together their first names make the initials for motherfucker :) <3 and i think that's beautiful#playlist#fanmix#“you really plugged mareux 3 times in one playlist huh” Listen. if we're on the assumption that marie is kind of half goth#also this color scheme of their character colors w/ the loading bar u see at the start&end of the game isn't perfect but…it's beautiful ha#gosh im sorry im aware this will be more pleasant listening if u have an adblocker. i hope u do……#p.s. hosted in my sidepiece/bootycall channel. this isnt really what i use/sub from on the daily so u wont get much interaction if any#with all that out the way Pls if u listen let me know what your vibe of this ship is post-whistling night (or in general??) + this playlist#for me forrest was never a target of hate but more someone who Really got in the way to the point of getting on the hitlist#if we keep to the “sense of justice” marie got from him +other strong traits then diff scenarios open up where she considers sparing him#and from there i kinda picture the dynamic At First as Feral beast with Shiny new chew toy (who confirmed Can Flirt Back) but then develops#forrest is bitter/dark/temperamental & sentimental enough to meet her perspectives part way#it all grows into a turbulent friendship that goes into a turbulent romance. and Perhaps peace?? s/o to anyone who's into this lol#excuse the non-fanfic happening in these tags but also imagining them bonding from bad parents lmao but from two diff perspectives#where marie would stab hers and probly forrests once theyre friends if he was hurt by 'em#but i like imagining forrest on more of a “they sucked but it was a different time & they didnt know better”#with someone specifically like marie replying No fuck them severely#“Oh what? Youre gonna get revenge for me? :) By killing their kid who is me? :)” / “FINE Forrest I just might”#and both of them possibly being musically inclined but lol for diff reasons went on another path. they can Play oh boyo this ship's a treat
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[Image description: A digital drawing of Paul Hackett from the film After Hours. The piece is landscape, but the bold dark blue background has a lot of empty space, with Paul confined to the right side. The piece is drawn upwards of his shoulders. He has a exhausted and apathetic expression on his face, with his head tilted to one side slightly. His skin is coloured with exaggerated tones, with dark purple shadows circling his eyes. He is covered in a white plaster dust, which congregates on his disheveled hair and suit jacket. Behind him, there's an askew streetlight, which has a glaring red light at the top. It is the brightest part of the piece, and is drawn with spikes of red protruding from the lighter light yellow in the middle. To the left of this, there's the phrase "stop him!", written out like it is on his wanted poster. The lineart is a very dark navy colour, although it veers redder on Paul. It has stark shadows but also sections of softer, more textured shading.]
Inktober - Day 8 (Hike)
Film - After Hours (Martin Scorsese, 1985)
#inktober#inktober 2024#after hours#paul hackett#after hours fanart#paul hackett fanart#eyestrain#digital art#huge fan of films where some poor guy just has the worst time ever#especially when it just sort of is because hes in wrong place#winning formula truly#paul hackett certainly does have a terrible time#also second time drawing griffin dunne but i think the first time looked more like him lol#(btw isnt it crazy that he directed pratical magic??)#anyway after hours is a classic would recommend#also just a very visually lovely film#song of the day is last night in soho by dave dee dozy beaky mick and tich 🥳#i am kind of obsessed with them they are a bunch of silly fellas#i think that songs well known cos of the movie of the same name but pls check out their other stuff#i am willing to give out personalised recommendations 😊 pls 🥺#(^ that goes for music in general lol)#anyway fun fact tich (the fella in the band name) is actually pronounced tick#didnt know that until months into listening to them haha (i listened to the song dddbmt)
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i have to say i find the way ppl talk abt gaylors to be strange…..i’m not one myself but as a lesbian i don’t like the way ppl act like gaylors are evil somehow for calling tswift a lesbian like in reality who cares…….truly i think it’s bc they r the only mainstream group of women speculating on the sexuality of a celebrity woman to that degree of fame. bc tswift fans who r obsessed w her heterosexual dating life r not in any way subject to scrutiny by ppl in general no one cares. and as much as there has been general debates on the ethics of speculating the sexualities of celebrity men and making fun of ppl that do there is a vastly different tone abt it. like ppl make fun of them and say they shouldn’t do it and whatnot (although i would like to point out that similarly this is mostly done by woman & all of this very much takes on a look at these silly women tone) but like there is a tone of superiority around ppl who dunk on gaylors and very much a tone of like look at these delusional women who have convinced themselves that someone sooooo obvs heterosexual is a lesbian aren’t they crazy. there is smth in particular abt talking abt a woman possibly being a lesbian that really rubs ppl the wrong way perhaps bc it is the antithesis of a woman’s role & it makes ppl uncomfortable to think a celebrity woman who has been marketed to them as being an ideal woman could potentially defy her expected role……i personally don’t think she is a lesbian but like other ppl calling lesbians delusional for thinking she is bothers me……so i am coming out to you all as a gaylor ally i stand w gaylors
#michelle speaks#also i saw a post that was annoying to me like oh ppl don’t want to engage w REAL gay artists so badly & they want to be so normal#so they want to listen to tswift and pretend she’s gay to be normie & not have to listen to real gays 🤪#which is like. a very strange take. do u think all the gaylors do not listen to other lesbian music? do u think they only listen to her 😭#also like idk…..smth tells me a lot of ppl reblogging that post probably do not listen to a lot of gay woman artists either lmfao.#obvs there is an extremism to this which goes too far. but like in general. just let the girlies have fun. who cares.#i also do think there is a general misogyny to the hatred ppl have for tswift fans who r mostly young women/girls lol#i’m by no means a tswift fan either but like 😭 ppl just love to criticize women so much fr……#also like idk. i listen to a lot of not so well known gay/bi women artists and like. i think virtue signaling abt ur music is just weird 😭#like u should listen to music that u enjoy…..who cares if it’s mainstream pop like tswift……it’s music 😭
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so not only is the guy i met in dublin still texting me, he's now also sending me music recommendations that are actually seriously good?? 😩 like why can't i meet men like this in my own country ugh
#he definitely got the memo about me being into arctic monkeys lol#all the recs have very monkey-y vibes#and he's just got great taste in general but then of course he does bc he's irish#anyways just goes to show that i'm just not made for dating apps#none of the conversations or dates i have on them ever go anywhere#and they all have terrible taste in music too#and then i randomly meet this man in a pub on a rainy thursday morning that i *do* actually like but he lives in a different country#figures#anyways just rambling now soz#minnie talks
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anyway yeah relevant to that post abt being deaf/hoh and ppl excluding u from conversation bc of it (even unintentionally), that's smth that's been really deeply bothering me lately bc there are a few ppl I routinely have to deal with who do it a lot and it Pisses Me The Fuck Off I've lost all patience w them. giving up and calling it ableism and walking out idc anymore 🚶♂️
#theres a guy at work whos incredibly annoying for it but tbh hes bad at his job in general anyway n everyones annoyed at him all the time#so at least i get some solidarity from my other coworkers (who are generally rly accommodating of my deafness)#i dunno how he hasnt got the memo ive explained im deaf so he needs to face me n make sure he has my attention n enunciate multiple times#but nope still not getting thru to him! so half the time if he starts mumbling i just pointedly ignore him until he either speaks more#clearly or goes away lmao#and same with a friend of a friend im sure hes a nice guy and everyone else seems to like him n hes in our main discord server so i cant#avoid him as easily and ive been so tolerant of it but hes worn thru my patience entirely and idc abt trying to be nice anymore#if he comes on call and starts mumbling and sidelining me from the conversation i just put him on mute im not dealing with that anymore#i dont fucking care if its petty and rude to do that. im tired of trying to understand him and dealing with how left out he makes me feel#i hope he picks up on the hostility n feels unwanted so maybe then he'll understand what its like for me and fix his behaviour 👍#bc i have no other way of communicating that with him anymore. since I CANT FUCKING HEAR HIM!!!!!#he also has a lot of other annoying behaviour which is fine but this is my limit its so disrespectful and outside of my control#make space for my disability or go away forever#not sure if we could even be friends if he did change now bc hes soured my impression of him so much by this point.#sad! well theres other guys#im glad everyone ive met at climbing so far has been pretty good abt it. really not that hard to do!#anyway rant over lol. at least the guy at work is only on a temp contract so only have to deal w him for a few more months#unfortunately since the rest of that group is friends w this other guy he'll prolly be around longer. but oh well lmao#just crossing my fingers he'll drift away n never open discord again so ill never have to deal w his shitty crackly mic mumbling#or maybe he'll stop fucking calling from whatever wind tunnel hes in and properly join in on our movie nights instead!!!!!#it is sad bc i think he has similar music taste to me. there are def some things we have in common that could form a basis for friendship#but hes gone n ruined it innit#aaaanyway oops started complaining again... the bitch grind never ends#im gonna shower n go back to elden ringing it.... fare thee well#.diaries
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I have time during my lunch break for s6e20 and as much as I am a musical theatre lover, I must say I am not really looking forward to the musical episode
#in general i am not a fan of musical episodes because i think that's splicing genres#like. if it didn't start out as a musical it oughtn't become one for 1 episode. if you're going to be a musical you should commit to the bi#i half wish it weren't the wedding episode that they've turned into a musical one (i'm ASSUMING this one's the wedding one at least)!#anyway i know i'm very pessimistic about it but i AM excited for the happiness before everything hits the fan :')))))#i am deeply and inconsolably upset about rumpelstiltskin being Like That still and knew it was coming#but it still made me mad when he was Like That again >:((#in the meantime life goes on and emma and killian are getting married which is SUCHHH a joyous occasion! so i'll focus on that instead lol
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i found this poor attempt of a song mashup while going through my old projects in capcut the other night. believe me when i tell you it sounded way worse when i found it. here it is, finished and edited so it only sounds slightly off-timing. i will now inflict you all with this cursed ass audio. enjoy!! :D
#rys.txt#rys banging out the tunes#<- yeah i'm making myself a music tag. i will likely hardly ever use this but shhh. its ok#i came up with this idea like. 2 years ago i think. i only got like two lines into it before i gave up on it originally#i managed to make it work kind of?? i made this in capcut and you should not us capcut to make mashups please use an actual audio software#honestly just don't use capcut in general. its really slow and laggy and there's way too much ai shit. i need to switch editing softwares#i think i was actually kind of cooking with this idea tho. i think it would work if i had any idea what i was doing#this goes out to my mutual bitchboy who heard two trucks for the first time today. sorry dude lol#two trucks#lemon demon#montero#montero (call me by your name)#lil nas x
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why is every album an artist releases these days 'their best one yet!' like I'm sorry this cannot be possible please reevaluate their discography and see me after class
#I PROMISE YOU this is not just about certain super mega popular pop stars who have released albums recently#however... these albums seem to have been released and are seeing... from what I can gather online... mixed results even from Fans#and my very own fave current day band just released an album of THEIR own earlier this month and the general reviews were 'best one ever!'#I listened to it... it's good. it's fine. it's a little bit of a departure from their usual style and that's fine. but it was by no means#their best album. even their LAST album was better and IT wasn't my fave either....#but I definitely felt like it was better than this new album. I was so 🤷♀️with their new album I haven't even put it on the thumb drive#for my car yet which.... says a lot. usually their stuff IMMEDIATELY goes on the car thumb drive. IMMEDIATELY. this one... ehh#I'm not losing out not hearing it in the car rn...#I just feel like there is no real critiquing of music anymore I guess IDK....#but I cannot stress enough this is NOT just about two popular popstars lol I don't even listen to their stuff I just see#things online and I'm like hmmmm.... every artist cannot possibly be releasing their BEST ALBUM YET every time#erin explains it all
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But mainly, and really:
#red's week in music#STORYTIME WITH RED GATHER ROUND KIDDOS!#was at kids club tonight and went in knowing little 8 year olds mom had her baby this morning and lil girl was now big sis if two#and knew she hadnt come from home bc her hair was a mess of someone who didnt know curls trying to do it lol#shes generally emotional and dramatic but we can all see that shes a lil more so tonight. understandably. lotsa change#well she kinda hinges on this one thing of not getting the verses said to earn a jewel bc she wasnt able to say them-- totally fine! we'll#practice and get them later! but shes distraught bc she worked on them with mum and wont get jewel so i keep telling her when we'll work on#them together and when ill listen to her and we can get it done. cool. then lesson time shes up and down sniffly and the lesson says smth#about childbirth-- bursts into disarray. i ask her if she wants to step out and we blow her nose and she keeps talking about the verse so i#tell her solutions for that and then shes working herself up so i work thru calming down and she goes from#“i think im mad” to “mom would let me do what i want!” and i know the real issue isnt the verse but thats what shes telling me so...#adult shes staying with cautiously steps in and she calms down to tell me “its not the verse... i think i miss my mom”#oh my heart i know honey i give her a hug and we talk about the sleeover shes going to have and when shes going to see mom#and shes sleeping next to lil sis so shes going to give sis a big hug and tell her theyre going to see mom in the morning#and then i ask her if she wants to go back and she does and i just hold her and hug her the whole time#i give her another squeeze when she leaves and tell her to enjoy her sleepover#her friend shes staying with i should not did a very sweet of coming over and saying “hey lookit this new book i got do you wanna color it#with me maybe?“ which was such an emotionally mature thing for her and to see lil kiddo cheer up warmed me#teachers we debriefed and talked about kids going thru stuff at home and not being able to tell and process their emotions and stuff#and then i shared with mum on the ride back and she goes “yup. lil toddler will just miss mom-- its trauma at this age. this is why i#panicked and called my mother to come for your sis's birth bc dad said he could handle you but my heart couldnt for what you would go thru.“#i was six when my sister was born. my grandma being there before consistently made me giddly excited in that time waiting for dad to bring#us to the hospital.#anyway my heart was full and im praying extra hard for two lil girls in a sleepover missing their mom tonight.#red's personal sitcom#Spotify
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ive inherited a copy of lolita from my parents (i.e. i stole it from the library in our basement and started treating it like its mine) with the 1989 vintage international cover and i think its actually not that bad. better than the 50th anniversary one with the lips anyway imo (which is the cover for the library ebook vers ive checked out).
like i think any cover that incorporates the "only convincing love story of our generation" quote anywhere kind of sucks on principle, and the fact that it features a photo of a girl at all really goes against nabakovs instructions, but compared to other covers that break those two rules, the haziness of the photo creates a really evocative atmosphere i feel matches the book more or less.
#im keeping most of my lolita thoughts to myself because i know it can be an uncomfortable book to talk about when#not intentionally trying to engage with it but. good lord ive highlighted a lot!#mostly stuff where H.H. is being a lying little bastard even in his narration#theres also this passage in ch14 after he um. 'stole the honey of a spasm' when dolores sat on his lap (not a fun passage to read lol!)#where he goes: What I had madly possessed was not she‚ but my own creation‚ another‚ fanciful Lolita—perhaps‚ more real than Lolita;#overlapping‚ encasing her; floating between me and her‚ and having no will‚ no consciousness—indeed‚ no life of her own.#(end quote. forgot quotation marks) which ohhhhh my god. subtlety is for losers lmao.#H.H. IS VERY VERY BAD AT MAKING HIMSELF LOOK GOOD DESPITE HIS BEST EFFORTS.#he claims he memorized charlottes confession of love perfectly and had conveyed in on paper perfectly#but also he completely skipped parts of it (including where she talks about her late son) and inserted the line:#'you would be a criminal--worse than a kidnapper who rapes a child.'#yes. im sure she said that. to the letter.#or when hes like i didnt marry charlotte with the intention to (extremely detailed grusome murder plan). but ill admit. i thought about it.#and then she oh so conveniently gets run over by a car when she discovers his journal. yeah. sure. right.#SORRY again i havent been Posting My Thoughts on it but i am having thoughts on it in general.#it really is a beautifully worded book though. its got great prose. makes the actions worse almost because its filtered through this#dreamy artistic self-justification. which - to go back to the original point of this post - i feel this cover conveys well LMAO#its so much better than the movies oh my god head in my hands#jumping between the most 2008 musical to ever exist‚ legally blonde fanfiction‚ and a controversial literary classic. im versatile.
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I just opened my document of my women of classic rock playlist and seeing it again is like...ah, yes, the project I will literally never finish because there is no way possible that I will become aware of every single woman who ever contributed to rock music history. But it's a great idea! Just one that can never be fully realized.
Obviously that doesn't mean I'll ever give up on it, though, hence why I opened it for the first time in over a year to add new artists/bands I just learned of today.
Say what you will, but the perfectionist in me says 'If I put out a playlist that's "unfinished," no one will notice or give a shit if I add more songs/bands/artists later on.' So it has to be "finished" before I ever officially share it because I don't expect anyone to ever give it more than one, singular glance, if that. The point, anyway, isn't even really to make a playlist that people will listen to frequently, anyway - the point is to compile a thorough resource to introduce people to new-to-them bands and artists (or re-introduce them to ones they haven't heard or heard of in a long time), but the playlist only defines these artists and bands by a singular song, so if they catch listener's attention, then they have to go and find more music by these bands and artists. It's only meant to be an introduction! But a meticulous thoughtful one. That's what I'm trying for, anyway.
#crystal visions of lilies in the valley#it's over 22 pages btw. the playlist is like...double spaced though so I guess it's like 9 pages#(in my document the playlist - sorted in chronological order - doubled spaced goes to page 19)? but then the rest#is notes and links to more bands and artists that I have yet to integrate into the playlist because I need to do more research about them#(which also means I actually need to listen to them. LOL)#oh also those 19 pages only go up to 1988. I have an entire page of 'notes' (single spaced) of songs to add from 1989-1999#which is where my list is gonna cut off because I'm a 2000s+ hater (just kidding that's just too much work for lil' ol' me aka I'm lazy)#also: other people have already made awesome playlists of women in music from 2000-present so I don't need to steal their thunder#(actually I am just assuming that. I don't know if I've seen specifically playlists from the 2000s-present but I've seen general ones)
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something abt me is that i am so obviously neurodivergent that when ppl see i like something they think i know Everything about the thing. i do not and never will
#wynn speaks#like even tho bapo is in my brain all the time. i Don't Know Everything#idk the history. i haven't watched the documentary. idk shit abt the actors or directors. idk shit abt how it utilizes music theory.#hell i do not even know much about its historical context bc it is something i have to get better at knowing in general#likeit very obviously had an impact on the queer community back then but do i know thedetails of it all? lol. no#i love to analyze THE TEXT very very deeply and i will say i'm v familiar w it.#but there's just still so much that goes over my head because of the things i do not know#don't curse me with assuming i know Everything about a thing i'm allergic to it. don't curse me with authority over Subject#ilove to share things but i love to learn things also. there's still so much for me to learn. don't tell me i'm an expert when i'm not.#idk where this is coming from i'm so seepy. but if i had to guess#that muppet post rlly got to me. i like the muppets n my friends kno ilike the muppets but i am a casual lightly-below-the-surface fan#like yeah i like puppetry does that mean i know everything abt puppets. no don't curse me w that that's so scary#i liked that muppet post and i liked learningabt it. it would be so scary if someone thought i knew that already#if they saw that post and didn't send it to me bc they thought i already knew it#i do not know things. know this about me. or else
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was anyone gonna tell me brad taste in music reviewed hesitant alien and gave it the most absolute dogshit rating like. living up to the name i see like jesus christ, man......
#i didnt even watch the video i just skipped to the rating bc ik it would make me blind with rage if i did#bro doesnt get it but like. jesus man that could have stayed in the drafts#i literally dont trust any of these reviewer dudes bc they always have the most dogshit opinions and a lot of shit completely goes over#their heads like. sometimes they have based takes but uhhhhh it's rare#also he liked foundations which is funny bc he absolutely hated bullets bc it was 'too noisy" but literally every dude#who listens to foundations hears the production and isnt able to get over it and actually review the song (cough) bald man#this guy has been showing up on my recommended and i was like huh. whats he up to#still popping out (very) questionable music takes i see. u can just tell ratings are so personal these dudes arent objective at all.#its ok to say you like things something objectively perfect just doesnt exist dude accept ur not the audience for smth and move on#wow anna said something#anna's shitposts#welcome to the circus#ayo rant in the tags check !!!!#hesitant alien is one of my faves ever it's SO GOOD....#txt#bro and the comments....*skull emoji* i respect none of these bitches fr#what would you expect from a guy named bradley really....#Sidenote: i fw him in general he's just not immune to bad takes lol
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as a fan of sabrina since 2016 it's kinda funny seeing her blow up now bc arguably i think her past music deserved the hype more
#i don't mean this in a pretentious way i promise lol#obviously i think lyrically she's improved and her latest album has a much more consistent sound than her previous ones#but god she used to SING in her old songs!!!#current music in general feels like it has this very small range for vocals?#like yeah she goes high in pitch but she doesn't BELT like she used to - why aren't the pop girlies belting anymore?!!! OTL#sc
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#this really just happened#I have been obsessed with my purpose#so I decided if I show up as her everyday#something has to happen#I will see how that goes lol#I quit vaping and energy drinks#kind of caffeine in general but I am not insane#my body is in the phase where junk food tastes gross#and I basically live on fruit#but never a whole bag of oranges again#speaking of which I took a magnesium bath#and purged a burger from the arcade I took my kids to#my body was like what the fuck do you think you are doing right now#but I've been having intense spiritual experiences#that I haven't talked about yet#hydration and sleep are still things I'm working on#but when I'm up all night meditating and removing trauma from my body#I don't think I could ever get enough sleep or water right now#I can't explain the process my body has gone through#and if I could most people wouldn't believe me#I'm really lucky they do music a lot#but I'm also crying all the damn time happy sad all of the things#like you did not just say that to me right now lol#I'm leaving soon to go on an adventure#I'm not sure exactly where yet#but all I know is that I am in the antsy stage of waiting#to see him and jump on him because I miss him#I don't mean that how it sounded but that too#I think he will be proud of me
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