#(<- again. lighthearted)
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mothcpu · 8 months ago
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And the many shells cried out one word.
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spineless-lobster · 7 months ago
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Icarus and melinoë are like the elementary school kids who would shyly hold hands on the playground and I 100% support them they are so adorable
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blackberry-s0da · 2 months ago
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Day 13: sliced
many are the stars i see yet in my eye no star like thee
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chimerical-daydreams · 2 months ago
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kingloop horse loop is the horse
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"My guiding starlion!"
Is this it? Is this what my career came to be? Drawing isat characters as horses? Sigh.
Anyways here's a bonus for all sifstem (by @vulpixisananimal sorry if you discover the au like this) readers out there:
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Wow! A two-for-one deal on Cursed! My favorite!
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turtleblogatlast · 6 months ago
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[ cw: death mention / strangulation mention / stabbing mention / blood mention / self-sacrifice / codependency mention in tags / ]
I think a lot about how common it is for Raph to be the one to have direct focus put on him when Leo gets into all his near death experiences.
Like, when Leo is thrown off a building, it’s Raph who’s right there jumping after him, not even thinking about the consequences to himself when he does. When Leo almost gets skewered by the Krang, Raph’s right there to take the blow and send Leo to safety without a second thought. When Leo’s being strangled to near death, it’s a Krangified Raph doing the job, doing exactly what Raph would never, ever want to do. When Leo is telling Casey Jr to close the portal, it’s Raph who tries desperately to convince Leo otherwise.
Likewise, Leo is consistently very single minded when Raph gets forcibly separated from them. Both when in the sewers and by the Krang, Leo is dead set on finding Raph first and foremost.
I also think it’s interesting that during each of Leo’s near death experiences, the lightheartedness of his words during them goes directly hand in hand with both how close Raph is to him physically and how much danger Raph is also in in that moment. From a literal “I told you so” as Leo’s falling away from Raph to a soft joke about how “hero moves” are Raph’s style - both of these are on the more morbidly carefree side and both of these notably take Leo farther away from Raph and, in turn, have Raph not in immediate danger.
On the other side of things is the apology from Leo, heedless of the danger he himself is in as he seriously and genuinely speaks to a Krangified Raph face to face. Then there’s Leo’s freezing and desperation as Raph takes a hit meant for him and sends just Leo to safety, leaving Raph himself behind. Both of these involve much closer proximity and Raph being directly harmed - these together make Leo much more vulnerable in his words and actions, something not even the threat of death can make him.
These two care about each other so much, and they’re way too much alike for their own good.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt raph#rise raph#rottmnt leo#rise leo#honorable mention to the time Leo desperately tried throwing himself into harm’s way to get to Karai#and Raph is the one who has to pull him back#I also think that it’s interesting how both of them go about self sacrifice#because wow they both have problems with it#Raph’s tends to be immediate reactions not even thinking as he throws himself over his bros#Leo’s are often shown to be ‘for the greater good’ (said greater good often being his family)#once again I am saying that post movie these two would likely have codependency issues#considering Raph’s already present acute seperation anxiety and Leo’s immediate memory of Raph standing over him bleeding#another thing to mention is how Future Leo’s actual death still falls into the whole ‘morbidly lighthearted words’ category#I also wanna point out that in Many Unhappy Returns the trust that Leo wants so much does NOT come from Splinter but from RAPH#side note but in regard to the fighting that Raph and Leo were up to during the time between the shredder and the krang#I think it’s interesting that it’s NOT depicted as screaming matches - very blatantly not this actually#also also! I totally love how the movie parallels Oroku Saki and Karai with Raph and Leo respectively#there are so many parallels in general in this show+movie it makes me froth at the mouth#and because it breaks my heart - the beginning of the movie had Raph getting angry at Leo and lashing out at him#the end of the movie has the Krang very very angry at Leo and lashing out at him#both of these times has Leo ‘ruining’ a mission so…bad parallels#in the movie as well there’s a Krangified Raph who beats Leo senseless#so I have to wonder if Raph and Leo just…can’t roughhouse anymore#else Leo would flinch or Raph would be so scared to accidentally hurt Leo like he was already used to do before#then suddenly their usual dynamic of Raph never having to be softer with Leo is thrown on its head#worse is if they’re so terrified of this dynamic leaving that they power through their own sufferings to maintain it
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userautumn · 3 months ago
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hey buddie -> bucktommyblr do u guys ever think about how none of us were supposed to get this invested in tommy. like we literally were just like ooh what a fun and cute little love interest for buck to spend time with while eddie works himself out ☺️ and now Here We Are five months later, praying every day for a .5 second glimpse of a side character. do u ever think about that
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crispycreambacon · 6 months ago
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Not gonna lie y'all I didn't plan to do a full redraw. I just wanted to sketch this scene because I stumbled upon this while googling Gobo and Uncle Matt, and Wembley looked funny in this screencap. Then ruh oh I accidentally put in effort and. yueah.
This was fun to do! I used a different brush for the lineart, and I really like the simple clean look that it gives. I hope the expressions match the context since I didn't check the original scene, and I. I'm not going back to this episode y'all. The Fraggle Rock writers really heard me go "I wish Uncle Matt and Gobo would reunite..." and relayed that wish on a Monkey's Paw.
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necrotic-nephilim · 3 months ago
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Damian: So, is this thing between Drake and Todd supposed to be a secret?
Stephanie: Hardly. The only people who don't know that Jason loves Tim is.. well, Jason and Tim.
cackling over this. i think this *is* a conversation that 100% would happen. i love the idea that Tim and Jason are so obvious that they've somehow broken the scale and everyone can tell *but* them. they're just so wrapped up in each other that they're incapable of seeing the bigger picture. the minute they're in the same room all rational thought goes out the window. also think that's why it takes them so long to realize and confess feelings, bc they're in so deep with this rivalry that's taking over their life they just don't notice.
but everyone else does. bc well. Jason's eyes follow Tim around the room, and Tim always seems to inexplicably know what Jasson is up to, even when he's off the grid. they run into each other on patrols, they find reasons to bust each other's attempted missions for arbitrary reasons. if Tim has a visible bruise, either it's from Jason, or Jason has kicked the shit out of the guy who did it. they're loudly possessive of each other, where Tim gets *very* huffy if Bruce assigns someone else to deal with Red Hood and Jason does Not like other ppl flirting with Tim.
Damian and Steph probably gossip about it. there might be a betting pool about it. they have to make some kind of a game out of it so Jason and Tim don't drive everyone else *mad* with their unhinged courting behavior. if they don't laugh they will scream and lock the two of them in a room until they make out. which Steph is still arguing they should do. one day she'll convince everyone she's right.
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uranium235s · 19 days ago
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vestige of affection
+ flat color below because why not :D
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insert something interesting here
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mothcpu · 9 months ago
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protect me from what I want
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diezmil10000 · 8 months ago
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i will stop making this everyone's problem now, thank you for the replies and thank you for the asks (i hadn't seen them before, sorry for not replying)!! you are all very kind, let's see if muting these posts on desktop does anything to my tumblr app as some of you suggest. i will make an update in a few days for those who got invested :P
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hg-aneh · 10 months ago
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this is super odd but i love your lil fem streamer/youtuber au !!! are you aware that bilvy aka mrghostrat has a streamer/streamer wip right now? it's super super cute, you'd love it!!
Yes, i've... received about 100 comments* telling me the same thing
*(hyperbole)
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dredgesnails · 1 month ago
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and you know what? i hope jimmy takes grian out of the series and i hope joel takes scott out. and i think gem should team up with pearl when they both go red and convince her to kill all her allies
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defectivehero · 9 months ago
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If you'd like, please write about an injured hero who needs to be carried around by villain! >:D
“One more complaint and I’m dropping you,” the villain announces, briefly readjusting their grip. They have one arm looped under the hero's knee and the other supporting their enemy's back.
The hero has been steadily avoiding eye contact, instead looking ahead. They look a bit flustered, for some reason. “This is humiliating,” the hero sighs, looking down at their ankle with a menacing glare.
“Yes, it is humiliating,” the villain agrees, an annoyed expression on their face as they stare ahead. They thank the stars that they're walking down a rather narrow and abandoned side street. They wouldn't be able to do this downtown, in broad daylight—both because they're too prideful, and because someone may recognize them. “Maybe if you had paid attention instead of tripping over nothing-”
“Hey, that’s not very nice bedside manner,” the hero interjects. The villain has to take a moment to process that statement.
“Bedside manner is for people who are ill or dying,” the villain sighs, “You’re just dramatic.” Gods, why do they even bother? They could be at home right now, washing the dried blood from their skin and melting under the warm water from their shower. Instead, they're carrying the hero across town as if they're some sort of delivery service. Absolutely ridiculous.
“You haven’t dropped me,” the hero points out. They look far too smug for the villain's liking. Indeed, their next remark nearly makes the villain's jaw crack from how hard they're gritting their teeth. “So I must be doing something right.”
The villain takes a deep breath, trying to maintain their composure. Leave it to their enemy to make a simple act of kindness so painful, overcomplicated, and tedious. “You’re clinging onto my neck so tightly that I’ll get whiplash if I drop you,” the villain feels the need to point out.
“Fair enough,” the hero acquiesces. After a moment’s contemplation, they loosen their grip on their neck. The villain can almost feel the weight slowly seeping from their shoulders. They had underestimated the hero's grip strength, it seems.
They expect the hero to be still once more, but their enemy doesn't relax. It only takes a few moments for them to snap. "Stop squirming," the villain demands.
"I was loosening my grip, asshole-" The hero seethes irritatedly.
"Oh, I'm sorry, what was that?" The villain asks, making a show of looking around at the empty street around them. "Was I just insulted for helping my enemy back to their agency—which, might I say, is an entirely voluntary and selfless act of heroism?"
The hero scoffs and rolls their eyes. "Oh, please," they huff. The villain gets the feeling that, if their arms were free, they'd cross them over their chest in indignation. "You wouldn't know heroism if it punched you in the face."
The villain just stares at them, waiting for them to catch on to what they just said. The hero connects the dots moments later, as they evidently realize that they themself have indeed punched the villain in the face before.
An awkward tension clings to the air. The villain continues walking down the street towards the hero's agency, internally cursing their pure heart. If this is how inconvenient it is to be a hero, then they don't plan on doing anything remotely good ever again.
Mercifully, the building begins to appear in the distance. As the villain crosses the street, the hero begins to murmur. “Let’s go in through the back,” they say, “Just turn the corner, there’s a door back there-”
“Oh, absolutely not,” the villain interjects immediately. "If we're doing this, then we're doing this." They readjust their grip once more and stroll towards the elaborate front doors of the city's top superhero agency. They can feel the hero stiffen in their arms.
“Please, no,” the hero begs them. The villain doesn’t bother listening, instead continuing to walk purposefully towards the entrance. The security is laughably lax at this hour. It's when they cross the threshold of the entrance that the hero attempts to break free from their grasp. Thankfully, the villain had been expecting them to do just that, and they manage to hold tight.
The villain pointedly clears their throat, satisfied with the way the occupants of the foyer immediately swivel around and stare with gazes of recognition. “I think I have something of yours,” they announce, looking down at the hero in their arms. At this point, the hero is positively wriggling in their arms—desperate for escape. The villain finally decides to take pity on them and they release their grip, leaving the hero to fall to the ground.
“Ouch.” The hero mutters once they hit the ground. The villain rolls their eyes, knowing that the hero managed to break their fall with a tactical roll and land without injury. They push themselves to stand on one foot and someone nearby rushes to their side, providing them adequate support to remain balanced on one side.
Everyone's eyes are on them, as if they're waiting for the villain to do something. "You may carry on," the villain orders, when a few seconds pass and the onlookers continue to stare expectantly. Their voice seems to break through the confusion and anticipation, and the people scattered around the space return to whatever they were doing. "I've done my civic duty for the year." They mutter to themself, turning on their heel and heading for the door.
"Hey." The hero's voice makes them freeze in place. The villain inhales slowly, summoning more patience. They turn around and manifest a calm expression.
"What?" They ask, struggling to keep the frustration from their voice.
"Thanks." The hero smiles.
"Just- don't let it happen again," the villain answers, looking away from the hero's far-too-bright smile. They turn on their heel and walk away, pushing away any and all feelings born from their enemy's gratitude.
©2024, @defectivehero | @defectivevillain, All Rights Reserved. Reblogs are greatly appreciated—just don't steal or share outside of Tumblr, please.
endnotes below!
the villain, holding the hero by the scruff of their neck: look what i foundddd!
the villain: this heroism stuff sucks. the hero: *expresses their gratitude and smiles* the villain, visibly flustered: now hold on a second...
this dynamic really amuses me. I can't get rid of the mental image of the villain holding the hero by the scruff of the neck like a kitten, and the hero just kind of hanging there in defeat. good stuff.
the villain lies awake that night, unable to stop thinking about the hero. :3
and thanks to the anon who sent this request! I posted a cry for help yesterday very briefly and then got embarrassed and deleted it, but! the original point still stands: my ask box is open! send me stuff and i *may* write it!
if ur reading this, ily <3 hehe
tag list: @lateuplight @wit-is-wisdom @greengableswriting @whump-me-all-night-long @noawhite @rekhyt-of-arcadia @the-blind-one-speaks @sufferfictionalcharacters @basically-psyduck @alexkolax @subval01 @emerald-blade @felicia609 @surplus-of-sarcasm @ilickedanenvelopeandilikedit @a-chaotic-gremlin @unknownogre @prompt-fills-and-writing-spills @whatwhumpcomments @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall @agayprince @starsick1979 @a-lonely-little-ghost @agayprince @plum-tello
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caligvlasaqvarivm · 2 months ago
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Do you think if the trolls all came back, like everything in the main comic did happen and they were alive again. Do you think Feferi would actually forgive Eridan? Or want to even be his friend after everything? I don't personally like the erisol and fefertasprite interaction…felt rushed…..so I just wanted to know your opinion if things were different! :)
Yeah, I think they would be! Feferi is one of the trolls who takes dying the least badly (relentless optimism) and Eridan does genuinely feel bad, which means a lot when it's Eridan. I think she really is genuine when she says she wants them to be friends and also that she's really not the type of person to hold a grudge, and like... death is SUPER cheap in Homestuck, it's really not the horrific, irredeemable, irreperable damage that it is IRL - and if you're talking about (Feferi) and (Eridan), then they're both dead (and irrelevent) now, so the score is kind of even.
In general, the fandom - I mean, people in general, really - tend to have difficulty divorcing themselves from other people. We tend to assume that the people and characters they like will hold similar opinions to themselves. This is how people who like Karkat and don't like Eridan can mentally gloss over or even block out their clear, close friendship, or how people who dislike Cronus can end up overlooking that Meenah actually takes his opinion seriously and unironically defends his wizard thing. Feferi really isn't mad at Eridan or upset about dying the way we probably would be, because she's friends with the horrorterrors, relentlessly cheerful, comfortable with death in general, and death is also just not really that big of a deal in this setting. "I'm really sorry about that, that was shitty of me" is honestly probably all the apology she needs, especially if they came back to life anyway.
#i dunno in general the fandom loves to blow stuff up#and make it all way way angstier than it needs to be or was even shown to be#by all accounts feferi takes dying really well#im sure shes still not STOKED to be eridan's friend again but out of all her faults#holding long unreasonable grudges isnt really one of them#(that's a kanaya thing actually)#eridan's always gonna be an annoying pest to her in large doses but i think she basically thinks of him as a friend#also eridan responds to problems overwhelmingly with Fight#so this idea that eridan will be forever mopey and angsty also doesnt ring true to his character#if anything i can see him becoming annoying again because now he won't stop fucking apologizing#like bro chill its fine already oh my god why is everyt)(ing suc)( a PRODUCTION wit)( you#because thats the last point too like#homestuck always returns to humor#hussie even says in the book commentary that homestuck is lighthearted and comedic at its core#that it keeps returning to that as a touchstone#even during its tensest moments like murderstuck theres just constant funnies and gags#so i just end up going kinda :/ when an interpretation is purely maudlin or cathartic#like its more homestuck when its funny and characters treating murder with the same gravitas as irl#not only doesnt make sense in universe where death is cheap - ESPECIALLY for trolls#but also just doesn't really feel very homestuck to me#but that is 100% personal taste so if you like that stuff by all means keep enjoying it lol#you just arent going to get uber angst from me u_u
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turtleblogatlast · 1 year ago
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[ cw: risk taking behavior / circumstantial self harm kinda / ignoring of injuries / self-depreciation / slight ooc-ness but for a reason! / ]
Post invasion, Leo is fine.
More than fine! He’s better than before, even. That is, if you don’t count the slightly cracked shell and still healing bones, but those are only a problem when the weather wants them to be!
Leo really is better in the ways that matter.
He’s not as cocky, not as self-centered, and overall just more heroic in general if he does say so himself.
Raph even said he was proud of Leo!
So obviously things are going well.
But.
It’s not enough.
Leo’s better, sure, but he’s still got work to do.
So - and here’s something that will probably make his brothers faint on the spot - he needs to train.
_____
His brothers do not faint, but it’s a near thing for Raph. Mikey has to fan the snapper’s face and Donnie almost brings out the smelling salts before Raph shoots back to his feet with an excited grin.
Leo’s big brother gets teary eyed soon after and envelops him in a bear hug, saying once again how proud he is that Leo is growing up.
Leo lets himself be hugged, even hugs back as fiercely as he can, because unbeknownst to Raph, this marks the end of Leo’s childhood.
He lets himself be hugged like a kid one last time, looking through the hole in Raph’s shell all the while.
_____
Leo only trains the regular way with his brothers and occasionally April and the Caseys, but most especially Raph.
But of course that’s not enough, it was never going to be.
So he goes through the motions of the stretches, the spars, the meditation, and then he leaves.
He makes sure to have his excuses ready, usually defaulting to Hueso as his go to since his brothers are easily bought off with the promise of pizza. Leo hasn’t yet found the tracker Donnie installed in him, but when he does that’ll be dealt with too! But for now, this should be good.
See, the invasion made him realize something.
It’s not about him, but it was his shortcomings that led to everything going to hell.
So he just…needs to get rid of those shortcomings.
He’s working on it, gaining fighting skill in training, but there’s more he needs to do, more skills he needs to train.
Leo watches intently as Repo Mantis swindles someone, he memorizes the sleight of hand that Hypno performs, he sneaks back into the Mystic Library and is so quiet the hush bats forget he’s there, he talks Big Mama into honing his manipulation, and he even sneaks into human hospitals and reptile veterinary clinics to get a clue on more serious injuries.
And after any of these, he heads to Run of the Mill to compete in the Maze of Death.
_____
This is his twelfth time going through the (newly remodeled and even more deadly) Maze of Death, and would be his fifth time winning. The first three times had him waking up in Hueso’s office, and each time he wakes his old persona shines through.
He always waves off Hueso’s annoyance and questions and insists on trying again next time before he steals some pizza and bails.
The skeleton actively tries to stop him from entering the Maze after the first time, but hey- mystics are allowed before you enter.
It’s easy enough to teleport on by.
Harder to meet Hueso’s - and later his brothers’ - eyes when he fails again.
When he first actually won, Hueso congratulates him in that typical deadpan tone of his.
“Ah, felicidades, Pepino. Now you can move on, sí?”
“Hm? Nah, boneman! That run was sloppy!”
And then Leo runs off before Hueso can stop him.
He doesn’t even look at his picture on the champion wall when he next comes around. It’s not much to look at anyway.
_____
His second win is much like the first, and only his third win is actually acceptable.
But he knows the field too much now. He needs a challenge.
When he attempts to go through it blindfolded, he’s quickly shown how much he doesn’t know the Maze. So, obviously, he loses again.
He got a bit more banged up that time around.
“Pepino, basta ya, you’ve already won. Where are your brothers?”
“I can’t stop yet, señor! This is for my brothers - no les digas, please.”
Even if Hueso wanted to tell Leo’s brothers, they haven’t been in enough for him to get to, and it’s not like Hueso has their number since Leo’s the one Hueso usually contacts. For now, Leo’s safe to continue as is.
Though his injuries are getting harder to hide, and there’s only so much his shell in particular can take.
So to speed things up, he incorporates the blindfold into his regular training.
His brothers question it, of course, but hey, he initially got the idea from seeing Lou Jitsu do it in the third best Lou Jitsu movie, so it comes as a great excuse now.
He’s only a little put off by how fast Mikey adapts to it when the others try.
“I dunno-“ Mikey shrugs when asked, “You guys shine so brightly anyway, a mask doesn’t do much.”
Seeing their mystic energies is pretty cool, Leo can admit.
He just wishes he could grasp that himself - and that it was useful for a death maze.
_____
Leo’s training pulls off eventually, and soon, after a few more losses, he wins a forth time. But it’s a near loss, and a near loss is the difference between someone living and dying.
He’s gotta go again.
Hueso’s more insistent than ever, though.
“You must stop, Pepino.”
“But I can do better-“
“You don’t have to! Your shell is bleeding - ¡por tu propio bien, poner fin a esto!”
“I told you, this is for their own good! For everyone’s own good!”
He forgets the pizzas when he leaves. He claims sickness when he hides under his covers.
He ignores how childish the act makes him feel.
_____
Leo’s getting better, and his reflexes and tact in training shows this. His other training of his subterfuge and medical skills also prove to be useful.
He’s pretty good at hiding injuries, now! Though not so good at hiding a pained shell. Even Donnie looks at him with blatant concern (and understanding) when Leo can’t help but take a sharp breath whenever he lands on his back.
It’s hard not to go right back into waving everything off with jokes like he used to. Deflections are easier when they’re annoying!
But- this is just another reason that he needs to get better, right? So his brothers won’t worry. He doesn’t need the spotlight anymore - he’s over that, thanks.
He squashes down the part of him that perks up when Splinter says he’s growing up. He actively kills the part of himself that cries at the same phrase.
_____
So. Yeah. This’ll be his twelfth time running the Maze. And, hopefully, his fifth win. Maybe he really will move on after this.
The Hidden City is pretty big! There’s probably a bigger challenge somewhere.
Maybe Big Mama has a more secret Nexus hidden away, out of the public eye.
Well, whatever. That’s a future problem for him to figure out, yeah? For now, he carries on like usual, teleporting to the entrance of the Maze and diving right in.
Even blindfolded, he works his way through, dodging and weaving and feeling as he goes. He even tries to evoke his inner Mikey and calls on his mystic energy. Not enough to cheat, but enough to feel.
Usually, when Leo teleports, he swears he feels every part of himself disperse into particles. Now, with energy thrumming under his scales, he can feel particles everywhere.
It’s not refined enough to tell him everything, and he gets a fun new burn and a nice whack to the back by getting distracted. Still, it gives him more than he had before. It makes him more aware of everything, like he licked a finger and held it in the air to feel the direction of wind, but every direction blew wind, all in different ways.
He makes it to the end with minimal injuries after that, and sure, his shell is screaming at him now, but he thinks he did a shell of a good job.
…Ah, he needs to cut that out, huh? Man. Maybe Donnie’s collar idea was a good call after all.
Leo needs to be a hero. Not a face man. Not a failure.
Not a kid.
_____
Leo doesn’t smile when the Minotaur takes his picture again for the champion wall, and he doesn’t listen when she tells him to “go home and never come back.”
He doesn’t plan to, anyway, yeesh.
He’s tired as he trudges out of the exit, and Hueso catches him when he stumbles.
Hueso doesn’t say anything. Leo doesn’t either.
Or, he doesn’t, until he feels a familiar large hand helping him up as well.
Leo’s face whips up as he flinches back, eyes wide as they meet with a worried (so, so worried) Raph’s.
“You told them?” Leo asks Hueso in betrayal, heart thudding wildly in his chest.
“Pepino…”
“Told us what?” Mikey pipes up from behind Raph, coming closer to get a better look at Leo, “Leo, what’s going on?”
“Your shell has been having pretty big setbacks on its healing, is this why?” Donnie demands, glaring fiercely as he motions toward the Maze.
Leo feels unmoored. “I-“
“Leo.” Raph interrupts, and no Leo doesn’t want to hear it- “Are you okay?”
And Leo wants to say “it’s not about me��. He wants to say anything that proved he learned his lesson, that he’s not a liability or worse, an active danger to his own family.
He wants Raph to continue being proud of him. He wants his brothers to trust him.
Instead, he passes out.
_____
The next time his eyes open, Leo’s on his side, staring at his blue lava lamp.
He knows without looking that his shell is re-bandaged. He knows his other injuries have been dealt with too.
And unless Leo learned how to do some pretty impressive medical sleepwalking, he knows he’s not getting away this time.
All three of his brothers being in his room prove that.
“What’s been going on, Leo?” Mikey asks, and his voice cracks partway through.
He’s looking at Leo like he’s searching for something, but Leo doesn’t have anything to show. Nothing’s hidden, he just did some light spring cleaning is all, throwing out all the parts he didn’t need.
All the parts they didn’t need.
And yet despite everything, he can feel himself falling back into old ways, a grin tugging at his beak and lackadaisical deflection on the tip of his tongue.
Maybe he should let that part of him show, just for once. It wouldn’t seem like too much of a setback would it? And he could really use a fun pun right about now-
No.
No it’s not about him. He needs to remember why he did all this in the first place.
“Okay- sorry, guys.” He smiles, softly, quietly, “I guess I got too caught up in training. I’ll work at it some more, don’t worry.”
“Oh, I see. Training. That’s all it was, huh? Training.” Donnie hisses more than says, nearly vibrating in anger.
“…yeah?” Leo nods slowly, because, uh, that’s literally the most honest thing he said. It was training.
“If it’s just “training” then why the secrecy, hm? Why in Curie’s good name did you prefer to sneak around rather than, oh, I don’t know, tell your family?”
Leo feels his shoulders rise at Donnie’s aggression, defensiveness welling up in him, “It was my training! Nothing went wrong, I’m getting better!”
“Better?” Raph asks incredulously, “Leo, you’re wasting away. A tap to the shell stuns you for minutes, you lost weight, and your dark circles are worse than Raph’s ever seen them! You aren’t getting better-!”
“YES I AM!”
The words rip out of Leo before he can stop them.
The room is silent as his brother look at him, all wearing expressions of hurt that Leo put there again.
“Yes I am.” Leo reiterates, shaking, “Because- if I’m not-“ He squeezes his eyes shut. “If I’m not-“
Then what was all this for?
Arms slowly wrap around him, and he knows now from the feel of the mystic that it’s Mikey.
“You’ve gotten faster, and sneakier.” Mikey says quietly. “When I accidentally cut my hand, you knew exactly how to take care of it.” His voice grows firm, and he backs out of the hug, “But those are your skills. You, though, you’ve been…you’ve been…”
“You’ve been dilapidating before our very eyes, and trying to hide it.” Donnie finishes, jaw tight. “You think we wouldn’t notice? After everything?” To Leo’s horror, Donnie’s voice is hoarse with tears, “You absolute dumb dumb.”
“I- but I need to train. The Maze is-“
“Leo, we don’t care that you ran through the Maze. We care you did it alone.” Raph says quietly. “We could have joined you, any time.”
“But- but I’m doing this for you-“
“Listen to your brothers, Blue.” They jump as a new voice joins the fray, heads turning to see Splinter make his way into the - frankly crowded - room.
“Dad, I-“ Leo begins, but trails off, suddenly more unsure than ever in the face of his father.
“It’s good you’re finally picking up training! Especially for your brothers’ sakes! But there’s such a thing as going overboard, you know.” Splinter pokes a sharp claw into Leo’s plastron, “Just because you’re dragging it out this time, doesn’t make this any less of a sacrifice. My son, you’ve taken after Karai an awful lot, haven’t you?”
Leo just looks at his father. At his brothers. Then, he looks down at his calloused hands, bandaged and scarred from overuse.
He swallows dryly. “Is that a bad thing?”
He feels his family crowd in around him, feels his father’s hand on his shoulder.
“It’s not wrong to want to be better, Leonardo.” Splinter says, softly and with so much grief and guilt that Leo can never begin to understand, “But you were never bad to begin with.”
Leo’s breath hitches.
“And-” Splinter’s hands rise up to frame Leo’s face. “You are much too young to ever consider sacrifice the best answer.”
“You got me to relax, Leo. So I’ll do the same for you.” Raph grins, eyes wet, “We’re still kids, right?”
And-
Leo smiles, watery but genuine. “Yeah, Raph. We are.”
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