#( she likes seeing ianto happy. he deserves it. )

[jakowskis]

Day 23 - Discuss Tosh. Opinions? Favorite moment? Least favorite moment? Any unpopular opinions? Any fun headcanons?

tosh my babygirl my princess light of my life angel darling… shes so good. shes so good 🥺 i love her dearly. she’s so damn underutilized i hate how the show regulates her to a supporting role + only uses her for romantic plots. WACK shes so much more than that. i want a plotline about her cyberterrorism like hello??? i want a plotline about her warped little mind.. i want a plotline about her finally learning spanish ;-; that show did not do her justice and it did not deserve her. i often say torchwood’s characters are too good for the show; tosh is probs the best example of that. no other character gets screwed over as badly as she does by the narrative (not even ianto!) she’s so tragic and lonely i just wanna give her the biggest hug ever. 

fav moment… every time she smiles. (or smirks. hrgh. tosh call me.) also every time she geeks out about smth. im tryna think of a specific moment but idk if i have one?? i just love her overall i smile every time she’s on screen she’s my girlie. when i rewatch i might rmr one though

least favorite moment, the absolute only thing i can think of (hell, my only complaint with her as a character other than i wish she’d get over owen cuz bad taste queen pls u deserve sm better) - it’s always bothered me how she goes over to owen’s flat in aditd and just starts babbling about her own problems. she even says something like “you think everything’s about you”, and in that ep it’s like ??? why are they all acting like he’s unjustified being miserable and angry when he's fucking dead?? like they're all so unsympathetic and mean, even tosh, and out of her it's especially weird?? tbh it just strikes me as ooc (+ kind of misogynistic highkey) writing. i mean, by all means, let tosh bitch, she deserves to blow off some steam + esp deserves to be rude to owen tbh fhsdkjfsd, but the way it’s done in that particular moment feels ooc and, like, how men write women as talking too much and never listening lmao u kno what i mean (owen’s tuned out in the actual episode but you can see her full ramble in the original script, on page 23). tosh has never troubled anyone with her issues before, why would she choose now to, and when she knows owen’s struggling? yeah, on second thought, i don’t hold that against her actually, that’s ooc to me fhdkf. thts just the writer being a wiener.

my only unpopular opinions (slash hot takes) are that 1) towen fucking SUCKS get her away from him, and 2) most people like tosh but she’s highkey underappreciated, esp in fanfic, because of fandom racism + misogyny. she’s not bashed like gwen is but she’s ignored completely which is nearly as bad, and a lot of it’s cuz she happens to be in a show with two white men in a gay relationship who are overwhelmingly prioritized 💀 i will never not be petty about the way that ship dwarfs everything else in comparison. also throwing towen into the background of janto is so gross n cheap. if ppl cared abt her they'd do smth more interesting. and it's never well-done either. ugh.

i have a few hcs that are gonna end up in my owento verse (gwen and tosh are prominent characters in it bc i love them, and their relationships w owen and ianto and each other also have value lawl). tbh a lot of em are just things i think they should introduce into their lives to be happier. i want them happy ;-;

she starts coding video games recreationally!! nothing fancy but she rlly enjoys it + also gets into the swing of making little storylines n getting to express herself that way which is good for her. owen playtests shit for her

her and gwen go on spa dates sometimes. they put it on the torchwood credit card

she gets into fish tanks and fish tank care!!! esp like aquarium plants. shrimp and moss balls, that sort of thing. maybe plecos or loaches. she loves it + it’s grounding, which is good for her bc shes otherwise always got her head in her computers yanno. she’ll sit by her tank while she codes her games and the water sounds are calming. 

she also sits by it while she studies her spanish books which she does finally do. she doesn’t get around to the piano, though; doesn’t prioritize buying a keyboard. maybe one day (this is a nobody dies au btw so she will in fact eventually get around to it ;-;)

oh she’s autistic have i said that. the fish tanks absolutely become a spin. she has a few we know of from canon - math and computers, obviously, but also history (gbg) and the uk’s rivers (from gooseberry; i think it was just the uk maybe it was europe’s rivers. or the world’s! i don’t remember). she also loves trivia like she knows a fair amount about quite a lot of things + loves accumulating random info

lowkey also. giving her a kitty. i think tosh should have a lil fuzzy kitty to keep her company 

well this is smth from my owandy verse but i think it should happen anyway. so it kind of kicks off bc gwen mixes up a blind date (it was gonna be tosh & andy and then owen & a friend of hers, but shes an adhd icon n bungles the invites <3)... tosh ends up with gwen’s friend, who’s straight, but they hit it off and she invites tosh to have drinks or maybe come to a bookclub meet or something with some friends of hers?? point is, tosh makes some casual friends. maybe meets a pretty girl there or smth 👁️ but mainly i want tosh to have girl friends like i think she grew up very lonely i want her to have some normalcy

also sometimes i like tosh x andy maybe they have a little meet cute at a torchwood crime scene or smth fshdkfd. i think they’d be cute and he’d treat her well. she'd babble abt tech stuff and he wouldnt understand a damn word but he'd listen very intently

i also like tosh x ianto for similar reasons. i think it’d be a kind of friends to lovers sitch... they should just be close in general tbh, platonically or not yanno, and in my owandy verse i like the idea of smth kicking off between them i just think theyd be so sweet

she’s a very sleepy drunk and also a lightweight. if the team goes out to drink she’ll get two glasses of smth moderately fruity and then fall asleep against someone’s shoulder it’s very cute (this is just cuz i like the idea of a sleepy tosh 🥺 my baby my baby shes so precious to meee)

[vwritesawholelothm]

Ten Lines, Ten People

Rules: Share the first 10 lines of your 10 most recently posted fics, and then tag 10 people. I didn't go with exactly 10 lines since how much I should share felt different for each fic, but it's my post so whatever. And I went with 10 recent fics, not the 10 most recent fics due to the fact I'm in Multiamory March rn and that would mess stuff up.

I was tagged by the lovely @mad-elia, so go look at lilies entry first ^-^

“Almost everything you do is unsafe, Darling. At least you have an expert helping you, and a properly trained dragon.”

Bliss

“Oh my god, I forgot you guys are all way too Mormon. Did you not know gay people existed? I think the rest of them know gay people exist.” “No, I didn’t! What’s a gay?” “You, apparently, by how you’re all nervous about this.”

Viva la Gays, Right?

Sparrow, on the other hand, isn't as sweet. He'll only accept a flower if it's shot at him with an arrow, and he calls Daring a dork every time he tries to recite poetry. Instead, the way to his heart is through flattery.

Daring's Affections

“I hate America. Everyone has a gun and three Wasingtonians have threatened to shoot me because I’m on their property so far. That’s how I died the second time, I don’t need that!” “Jack,” Ianto said, voice level over the phone, “you sound American and you have dozens of guns. You do not get to make moral judgments here.” “I’m not making a moral judgment, I’m pointing out how annoying they are.” “Honey, you are also annoying.”

Vampire Hunter

Apple peers through the window, catching sight of a band. Almost all of them are girls, with one guy on the keyboard. He doesn’t catch her interest, though, as she’s too struck by how gorgeous the women in the band are. One has snow-like hair, interrupted by shocks of icy blue. Another one has matching white hair, but in a different style with streaks of pastel pink, matching her rebelliously torn skirt. There’s a girl with hot pink and red mixed into her brown hair, and a fiery, hungry-for-the-world expression plastered across her face. There’s one with a gentle smile, dawning baby blue and playing her instrument with her eyes closed, like she knows the song too intimately to look at it.

You Are Gonna Rock It, Apple! - Chapter 4: Rock Me To The Core

“I miss her, Apple.” “I’m sure.” “Is this what happens to everyone? Bones in the ground that no one thinks about? That get dug up a dozen times? Do we have no life after death?” “Philosophy is for when we’re at school, Raven.”

Ever After Hamlet - Act Five

As is often the case in stories like this, the hero only meets three challenges along her quest. The next figure she meets is her dear Sparrow. But he has obscured himself, his clothes replaced with those of a prisoner and the few items he has stolen. In addition, his time in the woods has changed him. His eyes have a darker look to them, and he’s far from the kept look of most noblemen. As for Cedar, she comes across as a miserable young man, her once perpetually happy face worn tired with grief and longing. Her eyes- those of a widow, while far too young for it to fit. With neither bringing a spark of familiarity to the other, they see each other as they would see any other figure in these woods. As a foe, to be disposed of.

Ballad 150

Good, Martha thinks. She’s no stranger to people getting melted to some degree– she’s seen some weird stuff during her interplanetary travels– but this time it’s deserved. They end up back at Martha’s flat. Kitty’s has been taken back by the landlord, so Martha says that Kitty can crash on her couch as long as she needs. Secretly, Martha hopes it’ll be a while. She hopes it might morph into forever, even, but that part is so secret that she herself doesn’t realize it. Plus, she and Kitty haven’t really solidified into a “something” yet. They’re more of an “almost” for now.

First Kiss

“Listen, you Sparrows and Bluejay have gotten on my nerves for the last time. Tonight you will be given a taste of your own medicine. Again, in trial by combat.” “This is stupid!” “Yeah, this is beep!” “Call it what you want. You all need to chill out.” “Wait,” a cat slinks forward, “are all of the ladies in the stands Cedar?” “Hey!” Bluejay chirps, “my girl is Woodpecker!” The cat defensively puts up his paws and hops backwards. Brooke sighs, “Yes, all of you somehow managed to pull your respective Cedars. How you managed it, I’ll never know.”

Into the Sparrowverse

Serena sits next to him, "You're still upset about that." "I am. But I talked through it with Greninja, and I'll be fine. I just have to ground myself next time I battle." Serena smiles, brushing some snow off of his hair. "You're a lot different from the guy who jumped off Clemont's gym." He shakes his head, "I jumped off a cliff while I was out there to save a Spewpa." "Hm. Maybe jumping off of things to save people is just a core part of who you are, then?"

A Slight Smile

Tagging! @thelivingmemegod @gender-snatched @calebs-hangout-corner @feline17ff @broadwaytheanimatedseries and uhhh @/anyone I don't remember any other URLs at the moment

[hisbespokenpsychopath]

@iclearupyourshit​ / continued

    “ I need an excuse to pop in? Missing all of your faces isn’t enough? ”  River chuckled and rose from the lounging position she had taken on the sofa. It wasn’t a lie entirely. She did like the Torchwood Three team.  “ There’s been rumours of a pterodactyl on the intergalactic markets and I was wondering if yours could use a friend. ” 

[agent-jones]

Okay so I was enabled by @someawkwardprose to expand on my thoughts here and now you all are going to be subjected to my rambling about how this would have played out in my mind. I just really love how complicated in an emotional way it would have been.

And in my head this is canon because it’s how the actors played it so sorry Broken, but I’m different.

Jack and Ianto sleeping together from the beginning.

So, Ianto came in and immediately was flirting with Jack, there was a palpable sexual tension between them. In the warehouse, there was that moment where they were on top of each other and Ianto was the one to dip his head slightly, he was the one to almost initiate that kiss. And then he remembered why he was there. He remembered Lisa and pushed away. That’s the kicker he remembered. For a brief moment as he and Jack rolled around on the ground, as they worked together and flirted, he forgot. He forgot how traumatised he was, he forgot why he was there, he forgot that there was something waiting for him. It gave him a chance to lose himself for a moment. Jack was that from the very beginning for him. And it scared him and it made him feel guilty, but he couldn’t help how he felt around Jack.

So then he starts working there, and Jack keeps flirting and he finds himself flirting back. He was surprised to find that he liked it, that he was excited by it and for it. There was something about Jack that he was drawn to.

And then the offer came. One night Jack alludes to something more than flirting and Ianto agrees before he even means to. He walks out of Jack’s office and stops and he doesn’t know what he’s doing. But he rationalizes it. He tells himself that this is a good thing, he gets to be at the hub late at night, it gives him a chance to check on Lisa over night. It gives him a way to distract Jack from wandering down to the basement. Does he hate himself for it? Absolutely. But he also *wants* Jack. And so it gives him a small relief from the guilt about Jack. It isn’t just that he’s using him, but he does like him. He really does.

He gets to Jack’s little bunker and Jack pulls him in and his mind goes blank the instant their lips meet. He’s not had much experience with men. But enough to keep him from freezing immediately. It only takes a second for him to forget everything again. Jack’s effect is somehow amplified through his touch. It’s been so long since Ianto had had any kind of physical connection, and he’s been dancing around these weird conflicting feelings for Jack for a while now and he just gives in. Jack turns his mind off in the best of ways. He fully loses himself in him as they have sex. He enjoys it, he has fun, he gets to just have this normal night of hooking up. For a while it’s just him and a man he’s attracted to and it feels okay.

And it’s just a hook up so he leaves. But first, he heads to the basement and before he can even go into the room, he breaks down. He’s flooded with of the guilt from all sides. It’s overwhelming and he doesn’t know what to do. He’s torn and he’s broken and he hates himself because this is just what he has to do. But he never wanted to become a man who hurts people, who betrays people. He is inherently Good and now he’s resorted to this. But there is also good in what he’s doing. He’s saving Lisa and giving Jack what he wants.

And Jack is addictive.

God those times where they are together and everything fades and all it is is pleasure and forgetting and just existing in a good place. The guilt never hits until he’s alone with his thoughts. And he doesn’t realise it’s because when he’s with Jack, there is a part of him that’s happy. He likes Jack. He just refuses to let himself see it because he loves Lisa and she is still here.

He doesn’t realize Jack has actual feelings until Lisa is gone. When Jack can’t shoot him no matter how he threats, the utter betrayal and hurt on Jack’s face when he realised that Ianto has been using him.

And the way Ianto wakes up in Jack’s arms because he’s been kissed back to life and Jack holds him for a few moments. They sit there in that water and Jack holds him. Once again he forgets. There’s a moment of peace with Jack until he hears Lisa screaming.

And then Lisa is dead and Jack is alive and the team have killed her and Ianto is grieving and hurt and angry and shattered into pieces that could never be put back together.

And his anger is misplaced. He hates Jack for making him forget her. He hates Jack for killing her. He hates Jack for making him feel happy. He hates Jack for turning him into a man who cheats on his girlfriend.

It isn’t Jack’s fault and he knows this. But he still hates him. He hates them both. Mostly himself but he is human and misplaces anger.

And then Jack softens to him. He starts helping put him back together again. He is still angry and angry at him for putting him back together because he doesn’t deserve it.

He doesn’t deserve Jack to forgive him and want him again.

But then he realises he needs Jack. He needs to forget, he needs that touch that has always sent him to a mindless peace.

And Jack gets it and he allows it. He wants Ianto too. Ianto was important to him, he trusted him and finds that he can’t stop trusting him. He can see that Ianto is good and there is something about him that he can’t stop himself from falling for.

But they don’t start with the intentions of being together, so they are both guarded and under the pretense that it’s just because they need what the other provides. They have walls up and it only starts crumbling before the world turns upside down. There was potential there when their touches that make them forget turn to touches that they crave because it helps them feel alive and cared for and wanted and needed.

There is the potential to be something great.

[harmony88]

You're Donna Noble.

Excerpt from my current WIP below. 

Series: Forever With You Part 3 

Story: Serpent’s Soul 

Summary: Following an unexpected visit to Torchwood 3 for the first time in nine months, the Doctor and Rose end up taking Donna on a trip by herself, but nothing is quite what it seems, and it appears the universe may just be up to something.

“You are avoiding the party,” the Doctor said with a smirk, and Donna rolled her eyes, looking up at the stars.

“No, I’m not,” she said. “Just wanted a bit of air.”

He watched her, noticing the way she was gripping the edge of her mug as if her life depended on it, and he looked back downstairs, where Rose and Alice were smiling and dancing with the happy couple.

“Can I sit?” he asked.

“Do what you want, spaceman. You’re a grown man,” she muttered, and his brow creased as he took a seat beside her, wrapping his arms around his knees as he tried to spot what she was looking at.

“Orion’s belt,” he mused. “Ursa Major. Ursa Minor. Cassiopeia...Ooh...If Rose and I have another girl at some point, remember that one…”

Donna rolled her eyes and smiled softly, but she didn’t look at him, and his goofy grin fell when he saw the way she was trying to take deep breaths, and he realized she was trying not to cry.

“Donna…”

“I’m fine,” she said, still looking at the stars, but she wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. “I’m fine.”

“What’s wrong?” he asked, concerned, but she just shook her head and fluttered her lips, her gaze dropping to her shoes. “Did I say something rude again?”

She finally looked at him, his joke doing what he hoped, but he clenched his jaw and swallowed when he saw the look in her eye. There was a word for it, he was certain of it, but he couldn’t place it at the moment because all it was making him want to do was pull her into a hug, and that was exactly what he did.

A little to his surprise, she reciprocated instantly, practically squeezing him, and he let out a breath and met Rose’s eyes through the door, who bit her lip but didn’t walk outside, giving them some space. Donna pulled away, sniffing and wiping her nose with her sleeve, and the Doctor just sat next to her, unsure what he was supposed to say.

“I’m happy for them,” she whispered. “You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know,” he said. “You’ve told them that?”

“Of course I have,” she groaned, and he furrowed his brow.

“Okay, well… Good, then. That’s good, right? Do you want to go back inside or -”

“No,” she sighed, setting her mug to the side, and his eyes never left her face, trying to figure out what was going on. “Not yet. I’m fine.”

“Those two words are some of my favorites,” he said thoughtfully, and she looked at him. “Right next to ‘complicated’ and ‘Allons-y.’”

“Complicated is good,” she whispered, and he reached over and grabbed her hand, choosing not to push her on whatever was bothering her, but at the feel of his touch, her jaw began to tremble, and he pulled away instantly. “Sorry.”

“Do you want to talk about it? I can go get Rose,” he murmured, but she shook her head. “Donna.”

“She’s having fun with Alice, I…. They deserve that, the two of them. She really is beautiful, by the way. Looks so much like her it’s…”

“Yeah,” he said with a smile, and Donna let out a shaky breath. “She’s started to say ‘Mama’ and ‘Dada’. It’s… I cried.”

“Ianto owes me money,” she teased, and he rolled his eyes. “Oh shut up. Of course you cried. Your entire world is those two. We all know that.”

He just winked, and she laughed a little, picking her mug back up and taking a sip, ignoring the fact the tea had started to grow cold. She sighed. “You’re thinking about more kids?”

“Thinking is the operative word,” he said, clearing his throat. “We want to wait a bit. But...well…”

“Hm,” she said in response, and he raised an eyebrow at her.

“You don’t think it’s a good idea?” he asked. She smiled.

“I think it’s wizard,” she said honestly, and he grinned back at her. “You are - if I have to say it - quite the father, Doctor. And Rose is Rose. Your kids will be a force to be reckoned with. Already are.”

“Thank you,” he whispered, and she nodded, then turned her attention back to the stars. “So… what was the ‘hm’ then?”

“Nothing,” she lied, and he waited, because he could tell she was about to tell him more. “Just… things are changing. And it’s good. It’s so good, it’s the best. But I can’t help but feel like there is going to come a day where you have so many kids you won’t be able to have any other companions on that ship of yours -”

“It’s bigger on the -”

“That’s not the point,” she said. “And like I said, it’s good. But Martha and Mickey are getting married. You’re married. Jack and Ianto probably will get married. Gwen has been seeing some bloke she won’t talk about, and I’m just…”

“Donna, don’t do that,” he tried to say, but she shrugged, and he watched her tuck her hair behind her ear and sigh.

“I would have been married for… what, four years now?” she asked, meeting his eyes with hers. “I’ve just been thinking about that today. Wondering, I guess. What my life would have been.”

He didn’t say anything, and she sighed, taking another sip of tea.

“You deserve so much more than bloody Lance Bennet,” he said seriously, and she laughed.

“I know that,” she told him, but he wasn’t convinced, and she shook her head. “I’ve just been thinking, Doctor. But I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” he asked. She nodded.

“Part of me wishes I didn’t wonder about it so much,” she said. “It’s all my Mum wants for me which makes me not want to do it because God do I love pissing that woman off…”

He smirked, and they both chuckled a little until she continued.

“But then… Then things like today happen, and it’s all I can think about. And I’ve never done this before, but I’ve been looking at Alice and Tony wondering if I would have had a kid they could play with, too. And then you go and talk about having more and -”

“I’m sorry,” he said, and her mouth fell closed. “Donna, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize -”

“Stop,” she half-ordered. “Like I said, I think you should. It’s wonderful, seeing you so happy. I remember you two when we met. Whole other story.”

“We were happy,” he said.

“You were two idiots in love,” she teased. “I just don’t think I’ll ever have that.”

“I think you’re wrong,” he whispered, conviction lined in his words, and her breath hitched in her throat. “You’re Donna Noble.”

“I’m nothing special, Doctor,” she whispered, and he stared at her.

“Look at me,” he said, clenching his jaw when she did rather hesitantly. “Yes you are. You’re brilliant. And bright. And brave. And a whole lot of other things. It’s just a matter of time.”

She stayed quiet for a moment, not sure what to say as the words tried to dig into the chambers of her heart, and she took his hand, looking up at the stars again. “Your nougat center is showing again, mate.”

“Maybe,” he said, shrugging. “It’s also the truth.”

She looked at him, wondering how he managed to make her almost believe him.

“I...” she whispered. “Thank you.”

[grinchwrapsupreme]

Doctor Who should (but won't) have Jack back for a few final episodes, and give him the ending he deserves - reunion with Ianto. An episode where they have to travel to Pete's World, where there is another Ianto, who has lost his own Jack (or never had one), and in the end Jack choses to stay with him. Maybe he can sacrifice his immortality or Ianto can gain some for a 100% happy forever ending. If I recall Yaz hasn't really had the "seeing what becomes of old companions and realising it's not forever but choosing to stay anyway" experience that all companions have so she should meet Rose. In general 13 has felt a bit distanced from previous series so some cameos from old favourites would be good. We deserve it (but won't get it).

I haven’t seen most of 13 (not since It Takes You Away I think) mostly because I don’t have a tv and i’m too busy to try to find it somewhere BUT I agree entirely! And I think you hit on something that Jack really deserves which is A Choice. He didn’t choose to be immortal, he didn’t choose to get left behind (the first time), he rarely gets to choose who stays in his life and when he does then them leaving is inevitable anyways. Giving Jack the choice to not be alone anymore would be like the most cathartic ending he could get imo be it the choice to live with someone he loves forever or to die and finally be at peace, which we already know won’t happen if Boe is canon for real for real (and I’m always game for bringing Rose back for an ep or two i love her so much)

[neurodiverse-myfanwy]

Alexithymia

a/n: I am proud to present my first fic for my 25 follower celebration! This one features an autistic Ianto struggling to identify and process emotions and comes from the first prompt from this post from @bookwermthings. The title and the concept is alexithymia, a trait of autism and other neurodevelopmental disorders. WC: 996

It was easy, easier than anything, to say that Ianto would die for Lisa. For Yvonne.

A year later, he would die for Jack. For Gwen. For Owen. For Tosh.

And then two years after that, for Jack. For Gwen. For Rhys.

“I love you,” said Lisa. It was their six month anniversary, and the first time she’d said those three words. They were in a gorgeous French place, and she was wearing a fitted red dress, and Ianto thought she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

“I love you,” said Lisa, and he froze.

“I love you,” said Lisa, and he said, “Good,” and they drove home in silence. It took three days, several apologies, a bouquet of flowers, and a handwritten I love you Ianto wasn’t sure he even understood for Lisa to speak to him properly outside of work after that.

“I need you,” said Yvonne. They were being marched away from the Breach by Cybermen and she tugged him to the side and looked him in the eye and gave him the chance to run away, to try to fight the Cybermen, to try to fight the Daleks. To lead Torchwood One in her absence, even if it meant he only prolonged his own inevitable death.

“I need you,” said Yvonne, and he nodded sharply, and he ran.

“I need you,” said Yvonne, and he ran, and he never saw her again.

“I came back for you,” said Jack. He had been gone for months (Ianto would later learn it was over a year from Jack’s perspective), and then he came back and Gwen railed on him and Ianto thought he deserved it, because he left them. He left Ianto, and Jack couldn’t leave Ianto. It threw the universe out of balance.

“I came back for you,” said Jack, and Ianto said nothing.

“I came back for you,” said Jack, and “Dinner? A movie?” and Ianto said yes even though his heart ached just as much now that Jack was home as it did when Jack was gone.

“Sweetheart,” said Gwen. His mother had died, and he didn’t know who to talk to, who to tell. He couldn’t even talk to Rhiannon, because she was busy with the kids and with Johnny and heaven knew they hardly got along anyway. He told Gwen, because Gwen got along with him better than Rhi ever had.

“Sweetheart,” said Gwen, and Ianto lied and said he needed the loo.

“Sweetheart,” said Gwen, and Ianto went to the loo, and when he came back, his face splotchy and red and the edges of his hair and collar damp from tap water, he picked up his keys and walked out the door and thanked Gwen for letting him visit with her.

“Careful, Tea Boy,” said Owen. Ianto had damaged his chest tissue and bruised his ribs from binding too tight, and from exercising while binding, but in his defense he couldn’t just take off his binder at a moment’s notice to chase after a Weevil or fistfight a Blowfish. Still, Owen’s hand was gentle on his shoulder, and he looked down at Ianto and promised to buy him three new binders that fit better if only Ianto would promise to bind safely.

“Careful, Tea Boy,” said Owen, and Ianto shrugged him off.

“Careful, Tea Boy,” said Owen, and Ianto gathered up his clothes and winced at the pain in his ribs and made sure Owen’s coffee was exactly as he liked it until he saw the pristine package on his desk in the archives. He opened it, and there were three new binders, all different colors, and they fit like a glove.

“I hope I did good,” said Tosh. It was her video, though, and it was wrong. It didn’t have Tosh’s warmth or softness, or the gentle smell of her shampoo, because Tosh was dead. Gray had killed her, killed Owen, killed Jack a hundred million times over. Tosh was dead, and outside of this damned video, Ianto would never see her again.

“I hope I did good,” said Tosh, and a tear slipped unbidden down Ianto’s cheek.

“I hope I did good,” said Tosh, and Ianto walked away, because there was a gaping hole in his chest that seemed the size and shape of Tosh and Owen and Lisa and Yvonne and Mum and Dad and everyone he had ever been willing to die for. There was a gaping hole in his chest that belonged to Tosh, because she did so good, and he wasn’t sure he could ever be happy again.

“Thank you,” said Rhys. Ianto thought he had embarrassed himself, with the croquet set and the carrot sticks, losing his tie to a stranger’s pet. But here Rhys was, tears in his eyes, staining his cheeks, wrapped in the arms of his friends and holding a hand out to Ianto.

“Thank you,” said Rhys, and Ianto inched closer, awkward and anxious.

“Thank you,” said Rhys, but Ianto only did what any friend would do, didn’t he? He reminded Rhys that it was okay to grieve, it was okay to lose, it was okay to be sad, it was okay to grieve, it was okay to love. Even if it was hard to understand love, it was okay to love.

For Lisa, his heart pounded in his chest.

For Yvonne, he would tear apart the planet.

For Jack, he would listen and embrace and kiss until he no longer could.

For Gwen, he would talk.

For Owen, he would keep himself safe.

For Tosh, his heart was torn in two.

For Rhys, he would push himself out of his comfort zone.

Ianto didn’t know what to call these feelings, or how they were different from each other, or how they were the same, but he kept them and cherished them and grew them when he could and mourned them when he had to, and even when he ached, he was warm.

[sweet-sammy-kisses]

Love Drunk

Written for @torchwoodfanfests​ bingo challenge prompt: under the influence Pairings: Jack/Ianto and Tosh & Ianto Rating: G Word Count: 555 Summary:  Jack is hit with alien pheromones and can't hide his love for Ianto. You can read it on AO3

"I love you, Ianto Jones!" Jack declared as loud as he could as he nuzzled up against his boyfriend a dopey smile on his handsome face.

Ianto could only sigh as he ran his fingers through Jack's hair, while he loved hearing those words from Jack he would rather it not be when he is dosed in alien pheromones, ones that made him a happy, clinging, lovesick fool who was reminding Ianto of a puppy from the way his whole body was wiggling each time Ianto touched him and would whine like one when Ianto stopped.

A giggle escaped Tosh as she watched Jack nuzzle up to Ianto. Since they made their relationship official she had become their biggest fan and was happy to see Jack treating Ianto the way he deserved to be treated. "He is so adorable like that." She cooed.

A fond smile appeared on Ianto's face as Jack looked at him with love in his eyes, "I have to agree he is adorable like this."

Jack's whole face lit up and he placed a kiss on Ianto's nose. "I love your button nose. It is perfect for kissing. It is one of my favourite parts of you to kiss besides your lips and your dick and your as..."

Jack's list of Ianto's perfect parts to be kissed was cut off by Ianto's hand covering his mouth. Jack didn't look bothered at the interruption as he happily licked Ianto's hand.

"It is a good thing that Owen and Gwen are out on a call," Ianto mumbled under his breath, the last thing that he needed was for Owen to mock him and Gwen pouting, she might have come a long way and is completely committed to Rhys but it was clear she still had some lingering feelings for Jack.

"Owen would be replaying the CCTV footage steady for a week." Tosh agreed with Ianto.

While they both knew that Jack has no shame in showing how much he loves Ianto, he does everything in his power to let everyone see that Ianto is it for him. Ianto wasn't much for over-the-top grand gestures, it just filled him with warmth to know that Jack loves him.

Though that doesn't mean he isn't enjoying this. "

"Would you like to make Jack's declarations of love as your ring tone?" Tosh teased Ianto.

Ianto would admit that he was tempted, "We will keep this is on standby."

"I'll make sure to play it at your wedding," Tosh promised.

Before Ianto could respond a tired of being ignored Jack wrapped his arms around Ianto and carried him over to the couch where he proceeded to arrange them just the way he wanted with Ianto curled up on his lap and Jack happily nuzzling away at Ianto's neck. "Mine. My Ianto." Jack growled out.

"He's like a puppy. A very possessive puppy who doesn't like anyone taking your attention away from him." Tilting her head a thoughtful look appeared in Tosh's eyes, "Okay, so that isn't so much the pheromones but normal Jack behaviour."

"More like a horny bunny," Ianto mumbled under his breath. Still, he couldn't help but smile as he began running his hands through Jack's hair and the man began to purr at the action. He had to admit that Jack was adorable like this.

[searching-for-arcadia]

CONCEPT: Torchwood, but they’re an alien integration/alien-human relations call center.

Even though she’s not supposed to, sometimes Gwen can’t help but spend 45 minutes listening to callers discuss their non-alien integration related problems. Both she and the caller laugh awkwardly when the caller jokes about how she’s their replacement therapist since they haven’t been able to see one. She wishes that she could help with a wider range of problems and does her best to connect callers to the correct resource when that correct resource isn’t Torchwood. When people start yelling, she always begs them to not make her hang up on them and feels awful when she has to end the call because she can’t convince the caller to stop screaming abuse.

Ianto works really hard to solve people’s problems in the most efficient manner possible. It is deeply frustrating when the caller won’t let him because they don’t believe him when he says it will work. Torchwood deals with too many different types of problems to have scripts, but Ianto has developed a few of his own that he can pull out without even thinking. Unfortunately, his blandly helpful and pleasant tone leads people to regularly accuse him of being a robot and, for some reason, they will fight him about it. When Ianto terminates a call, he does so calmly and politely, reminding the caller that he’d be happy to help them later. His feelings very rarely impact how he takes a call except when he knows that the caller has just upset Gwen and Tosh. Then he’s not afraid of telling those callers exactly why they don’t deserve to be served at that moment.

More often than any other person on the team, Owen gets accused of being an asshole and a liar because he struggles to contain his disdain for the problems of the majority of the people calling in. The problem, in Owen’s view, is that too often people aren’t calling in with real problems that can’t be solved with a little common sense. Unfortunately for Owen, “Maybe use your brain” is not an approved response to any phone call. He’s actually really good at resolving complex issues with sensitivity when those issues do come in and will fight to help those people even when everyone else thinks it’s a hopeless case. To the chagrin of the whole team (who have to take people’s complaints against him), he can’t help getting snarky before he disconnects a call even though it’s against protocol.

Tosh is their impromptu tech support and is actually better at finding solutions to their tech issues than their IT staff. She loves talking to the aliens that call in about their technology and culture; this has made her a favourite with some of the regulars. Despite being at the job longer than everyone but Jack, she still gets flustered by the yelling (she has a call termination script pinned up next to her computer screen that Ianto wrote for her that she follows exactly) except when the caller is a xenophobic human. The righteous anger she feels leads her to very articulately take these callers down point by point. This tends to throw the caller so much that they hang up on her first.

Suzie embodies the phone-voice/real-voice dichotomy. She’s great at training new employees because she follows protocol and knows all the answers, but her idea of professionalism doesn’t involve being precious about the job or being buttoned up all the time. It sucks and it helps to snark, and she knows how to do without making the caller mad (unlike Owen). She makes judicious use of the mute button to make side-comments while the caller continues, blissfully ignorant of that fact that they are being mocked. She is the best at sensing when a call is worth sticking out (despite the incoherent yelling on the other end of the line) and when the call is going to go nowhere and thus not worth continuing. She can regularly be heard counseling Gwen, Tosh, and Ianto to terminate their calls based only on their side of the conversation (Owen does not need this advice).

Jack is fantastic at befriending callers but he hates every caller that gets routed to him because they “would only speak to a supervisor” and refuses to turn the charm on for them. Maybe he’s been at this job too long because his response to the abuse he and his staff receive is to just shrug his shoulders and say “That’s the job.” It’s not that he doesn’t wish his staff weren’t yelled at so often, but he definitely has a higher bar for “things that should be upsetting” than the rest of them and thinks that they’d all benefit from adopting his philosophy. He is very good at the job though and is, along with Tosh, their regular callers’ favourite person to speak to. In fact, people might like him a bit too much. Some callers come to Cardiff just to try to meet him and he has received more than one marriage proposal. When xenophobes get aggressive with him, he is very cheerfully aggressive back (if they only knew that he’s technically an alien). For all that he tells them to not yell at the callers (jokingly, most of the time, since they all either lack the energy or inclination to yell), he’s the one who yells the most. He’s always yelling accurate information, but he yells nonetheless. It never fails to make the team laugh.

[horselover107]

Since we’re talking about Ten and Jack these last few days: the Doctor pushing Alsano on Jack is was framed as being a good thing for Ten to do, and a way for Jack to move past his grief and get something of a happy ending finally by those few minutes it’s on screen in the actual narrative. It’s clear the writers did not intend for it to come across as callaous on Ten’s part. If you think about the implications of this for more than ten seconds...holy shit was that fucked up on Ten’s part.

The actual implications of Ten pushing Alsano on Jack if you’ve watched Torchwood are “sorry your boyfriend died tragically in your arms and this pushed you to your darkest point where you forced to sacrifice your grandson as your daughter watched and begged you to stop in order to save millions of other children by the hands of your boyfriend’s murders. Clearly if I set you up with this new guy that will heal all that. Oh. Oh you’re sad Ianto’s dead? Clearly you just need to date someone else. I know walking the Earth for months and that wasn’t enough for you to grieve and you were so broken that you left your pregnant best friend behind and alone now that all her friends are dead, but...new boyfriend. That’s how we fix this. NEEEEWWWWWWW BOOOOYYYYYYFFRRRIIIEEENNNDDDD”

Throw in the fact that in Torchwood Jack is mainly seen drinking water when the team goes out for drinks, and few times we see him break out the whiskey are either when he’s exceptionally wistful about the past or grieving a loved one...yeah Jack is off the wagon in that scene. It’s subtextual, but it’s not a stretch to draw that conclusion.

I feel like the implications here are that Ten either did not know (or care?) just how deep Jack’s feelings for Ianto ran, and kind assumed because he’s Captain Flirt a new warm body would fix him. I’m pretty sure that Jack wouldn’t have bothered making a move if he didn’t feel obligated because the Doctor pretty much told him to.

There are other routes Ten could have gone to make things up to Jack. Just straight up tell him he doesn’t blame him, and understands because of the choice he was forced into with Gallifrey? Track down Gwen Cooper and tell her he hasn’t given up on the human race the way she assumes he does. Give Jack a few minutes in the past with Ianto (or the rest of the team at that) the same way Ten gives himself a few moments in the past with Rose? GiveJack a promise of a few free trips now that he’s actually looking for a change of scenery and needs to be reminded that there’s good in the Universe? Nope, we’re just...going to get him a new boy toy.

And furthermore it’s not fair to Alsano, who has no idea the damage this guy he’s flirting with has at the moment — and that he’s only doing it because he feels obligated due the Doctor basically forcing Jack to shoot a shot he really wasn’t ready to take yet. Alsano’s a nice guy. He deserves better than being the Replacement Goldfish for Ianto.

[xxmisty]

My Big Humiliating Torchwood Confession Post, Part 2: the worse part :P

Warning: this will be another long post :P

So how the hell do I begin this? Maybe by screaming at Torchwood for existing? :P um, ok. So where did I get up to? Oh yes: Lucy had forced me to watch Torchwood, I hated it, the. I loved it, then it became my fuckin’ LIIIIIIFE

so, i got into Torchwood. I got back on T. I got back my ability to be truly swallowed up in a hyperfixation. And then i got really majorly pissed off with what happened next :P

A couple of days ago I made a coming out post about the way my sexuality has shifted and changed since I went back on T. Ha ha ha ha ha, you want to know where the whole fucking thing started??? Well pull up a chair and watch me foam at the mouth with rage and embarrassment about this whole thing aaaarrgghhhhhhhhh!!!

Is there anyone who’s been following me long enough to remember the oranges dream?  To my mind I can only think of two people who might be and I doubt it’s stuck in anyone else’s mind, but it stuck in mine. Ohhhhhh god, it stuck in mine, along with the discomfort and the embarrassment and the rage of it. 

Basically, back in the summer of 2013 I had a highly unexpected dream. It was a fetish-related dream for one thing which is actually really rare for me. For another, it featured someone I would never have expected in a million years. I’ll shift the white elephant out of the corner of the room: it’s Captain Jack Harkness. This was weird even for the time because although i’d started watching new Who the year before I hadn’t yet watched any of his episodes, i just knew of him from seeing stuff in tv magazines and trailers and pictures online and believe me, I was so weirded out by that fucking dream that oranges have been a source of discomfort ever since. So has Jack fucking Harkness. 

And so when I realised I was getting increasingly intense feelings of discomfort, embarrassment and awkwardness every time he was on the bloody screen I chalked it up to *that*. The god damned oranges dream from six and a half years prior. But it was *more* than that and I couldn’t put my finger on quite what it was until I realised it was exactly the way I used to feel when trying to deny the crushes that I had on characters in the shows I used to be obsessed with through my teenage years. Back in the days when I was having butterflies over looking at pictures of Gillian Anderson and Jaye Griffiths and trying as hard as I could to force myself to find their Male co-stars attractive instead to no avail.

And that’s when I started to have a Big. Gay. Panic.

I kept thinking it would go away. It didn’t. I kept thinking it would fade into the background. It didn’t. kept thinking I was mistaking my sudden and resentful love of Torchwood for a crush on a character. I wasn’t. I fancied Jack Fucking Harkness and it wasn’t going away.

It got worse. Much worse. Because Jack Harkness was like a fucking gateway drug, as I said to Lucy yesterday. I started to get some funny feelings about aaargghhhhhhhhh..... a certain other character from Torchwood. Ianto was already my favourite character (which was miraculous when you remember that Cyberwoman was the second episode lucy made me watch that fateful night!) and I really ship Jack and Ianto so again I wrote it off as something else but it kept gnawing away at me. 

And I went into such a stupid crisis because this was all the last thing i’d expected I honestly can’t explain how hard I tried to force myself to find men attractive. For years and years and years. And god, the number of fake crushes I had when I was younger to throw people off the scent of the fact that I liked women! I never had any changes in my sexuality when I was on T before either. But there I was, horny as hell, obsessed with Torchwood and getting all kinds of feelings I was NOT happy about when certain characters of an unexpected gender came on screen.

This post is already going to be way to long so I’ll give you the short version of the process that occurred in the latter weeks of January and first week of February: I increasingly ranted at Lucy for showing me Torchwood because it had ruined my LIFE and blamed her for EVERYTHING and started having a big fucking MELTDOWN one night when I first of all confessed with rage that Torchwood had become my utter hyperfixation, then spent several hours sat in front of her with half-mock, Half-genuine sobs, burying my head in her lap/arms/bosom and crying ‘IT’S SO AWFUL!’ While she patronised me in a Frasier-esque fashion to coax me through my trauma, until after literal hours I managed to force out the words that I was having some very confusing feelings about certain Torchwood characters.

I then begged for retcon.

She was wonderful. This was not a surprise, because she *is*. She just is. She has always been my absolute rock, no matter what i’m going through. She said all the right things and did all the right things and helped me more than I can put into words. And I was still convinced it was a temporary thing and would go away soon. I was sure when I got more used got the T things would go back to the way they were.  But they got WORSE! 

They got worse in TWO WAYS! The first was that sometimes I realised there might...*might*...be other men that actually weren’t competed hideous... maybe some that I might... actually... quite... fancy... (funnily enough though my attraction to women became a lot more sexual in its nature at the same time. Where as before it was more along the lines of ‘you’re very prettyi ... I would like to draw you... maybe hold hands with you... perhaps even a chaste peck on the cheek...’ it became quite a bit.... hotter?)

And worse than that the whole... Harkness... crush.... just got... worse. And worse. Dear god, I think at this point it’s like... fuck, i’m too embarrassed to even like... put it into words nfkubahhrrrghhhhhh And then it got worse because it’s spilled over into fffffffffpppppppp having a bit of a thing about John Barrowman and hhhhrruuunnnghhhh pahhhhh I hate EVERYTHING!!! 

This is.... so embarrassing. This is literally the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. Because as a result of this whole thing a whole bunch of humiliations have opened up to me. I have CHANGED since i’ve been on T again, I am going through all kinds of intense emotions and experiences (and they're WONDERFUL oh god I can’t even express how INCREDIBLE I feel on T. I feel so fucking *right* for the first time in my life. It’s like I can’t even process how mentally and emotionally amazing I feel. Physically too. it’s so *right*!!!) and i’m doing things I’ve never done in my life. 

Like BLUSHING!!! I never, ever used to blush and now I go BRIGHT FUCKING RED any time there’s something involving Torchwood or Harkness or any of that whole array of THINGS!!! And Lucy loves this fact because god she can wind me up something CRAZY!!! Which... I *Suppose*.... is the least I owe her :P since she puts up with what she calls my ‘hankering’ And has fed my habit by finding me photos and clips that i’m too fucking chicken to look for myself - now that’s love!!! <3 <3 <3

I’m going to have to wrap this up here because I already in a hot mess right now (you literally have NO IDEA how quickly and easily I fall apart over this stuff!!! Nfjhbkhghkshad stupid fucking PUBERTY)  but there will be a part 3 at the weekend some time - and if you made it this far you deserve a god damn medal!

[asarahworld-writes]

hen night

@torchwoodfanfests Bingo Fest - Under the Influence

Gwen stopped by Toshiko’s desk on her way out that afternoon.  “Er, Tosh, I had a question for you.”

Tosh looked up from her monitors.  “Of course. How can I help?”

“Actually, I was wondering if you’re busy on Saturday night?  Me and the girls are doing my hen night and I was hoping that you’d join us.”

“Oh.  Well, that’s actually my night to watch the Rift,” Tosh swivelled back to her monitors, looking as if she was deep in thought.

“The Rift can take of itself for one night.  It survived for years before Torchwood existed, one night won’t do much damage.”

They looked up to see Jack at the front of the room.

“You ladies enjoy yourselves.  Toshiko, you deserve a night off.  Have fun with Gwen and the girls,” Jack winked knowingly before going back towards his office.

“What would you say if I was thinking of asking Ianto along?”

“You want to ask Ianto to your hen night?  I’d say it’s your hen, ask who you like.”

“I think he’d enjoy it,” Gwen looked from Jack back to Tosh.  “Something a little classy, getting a bit pissed leading to the accidental sharing of ‘secrets’.  All in good fun.”  The truth was, Gwen didn’t have many people she’d asked to come out.  Her mother and soon-to-be mother-in-law (and, oh, that was a nightmare waiting to happen), Rhys’ sister… that was it.  With Ianto there, at least Tosh would have someone to talk with as Gwen acted as a buffer between her mother and Rhys’.

Four guests and the bride-to-be.  Perhaps if she got them completely pissed there’d be no arguments.

“I’ll make sure he’s free,” Jack laughed.  “Gwen, why don’t you come up in, oh, fifteen minutes and ask him?”  He turned to leave for the archives, then paused.  “On second thought, give me twenty.”

“No thanks, I’d just as soon rather ask him now.”  Gwen made a face at Jack and darted past him, shrieking as he reached out to grab her. “Don’t you dare, Jack.”

She was back within the minute.

“Now that that’s sorted, I’m going home.  Everything’s been pretty quiet all day, but Rhys’ mam has invited herself for dinner tonight and I can only assume that she’s going to want to go over every wedding detail and try to change anything she think my mother had something to do with.” Gwen rolled her eyes, packing up her workstation.  “I’ll see you lot tomorrow, then.”

Saturday.  Assuming nothing went horribly wrong, hen night.

The day passed quickly, though the Rift was surprisingly quiet.  Before Gwen knew it, it was five o’clock and the day was over.

“We’re just grabbing a cab over and back.  We’re getting proper sloshed tonight, so nobody’s driving.  Nothing super uppity, your choice of shots and beer.  But it should be a good night,” Gwen smiled hopefully.

“It’ll be whatever we make of it, I’m sure.”  Tosh said gently.

“Okay.  I’ll see you in a few hours.  Um, it’s nothing fancy, so wear what you like.”  Gwen waved as she left the Hub, beaming.

Knowing Gwen, Tosh figured she’d be wearing something practical.  She seemed to be the kind of woman who never took her boots off, always prepared.  In fact, Tosh was willing to bet that Gwen’s clothing choices for the night would be entirely based around practicality first.  Still, she mused, there was no real reason not to dress up.  Jack and Owen would be around to cover the Rift if anything happened. Perhaps this was her chance to live that life she’d forgotten about.

After a short, but relaxing, shower, Tosh found herself staring at the closet.  It shouldn’t be this difficult to pick an outfit, she was simply going out with her friend.  With unpredictable people and raw data she didn’t know how to compute.  Hidden behind her computer screens, her laptop, it was easy to focus on the matter at hand, whatever the case may be.  Tonight, however, was going to be screenless.

Keep it casual. Jeans, then.  A grungy tee shirt instead of a blouse.  And her leather jacket.  Simple.  Comfortable.

Dressed to the nines, indeed.  At any rate, whatever she had on would have to do.  She was due to meet Ianto in twenty minutes.

Hen night had clearly started early, Tosh thought as she observed Gwen’s party.  Her parents were switching between the best of friends and worst enemies faster than she could track, though they seemed to be enjoying themselves.  A fourth woman, presumably Gwen’s sister-in-law-to-be, was glued to a phone at the end of the table.  And in the middle of it all, was Ianto Jones.

One would have never thought he was going to a hen party, looking at him, unless they thought he was the stripper.  Dressed neatly in a three-piece pinstriped suit, Ianto stuck out like a sore thumb from the party next to him.

“Don’t tell me I missed the strip tease,” Tosh said lightly as she slipped into the empty seat next to him.

“Ha ha.  Funny, but no, there’s not been a stripper out yet.”

“Might be a situation we’ll need to rectify before the end of the night.  Doesn’t really look like the rest of them are up to it and after all, what else is a bachelorette party for?”  Of course, never having been to one, she was guessing at what should happen.

“Well, I know that if you phoned Jack, he would be more than happy to spring naked from a giant cake,” Ianto said dryly.

Tosh laughed.  “Too bad, I bet it’s too late to arrange for that. Doesn’t that sound like it would shock their mothers?”

“It would definitely surprise Brenda.  As for Mary Cooper, well, I think she might enjoy that more than our guest of honour.” Ianto tilted his head towards Gwen’s mother.

“Yes well, you would probably enjoy that most out of all,” Tosh said lightly, hiding a faint smirk.

“That’s entirely coincidental and beside the point,” Ianto said primly.  Tosh hummed in response, getting up and heading to the bar to order a drink.

“Oh come off it, he likes you,” Gwen rolled her eyes.  “If he doesn’t see anything back, he’s a right prat.”

“He likes me just as much as he likes anyone, which isn’t to say very much,” Tosh shook her head, raising her shot glass.  Gwen and Ianto followed suit, the three of them downing their drinks.

“Pfffft.  Ianto knows what I’m talking about.  At least, he should if he didn’t spend most of his time ogling Jack.”

“I don’t ogle Jack.” Ianto said dryly.  “Strictly speaking, there’s nothing there.”

Gwen snorted.  “Yeah, and ‘strictly speaking’, there’s no such thing as aliens.”  Ianto scowled and looked away.  Even as his scowl deepened, his eyes lit up.

“Oh no,” he muttered. Gwen and Tosh looked up and Gwen fought the urge to roll her eyes.

“Not on my bloody hen,” she said quietly.  Ianto moved to get up, but Gwen grabbed his hand.  “We’re having a ladies’ night.  With you. Whatever it is, Jack and Owen can handle it.  If he wants extra backup, he can call UNIT.”

“Yeah, that’s likely.” Ianto watched the older man as he made his way around the pub, clearly looking for something.

“Drinking game!”  Gwen gathered the party together, blocking Ianto’s view of Jack.  She looked at her group – Ianto and Tosh, her mothers, and Rhys’ sister – and tried to think of something that would be suitable.  Already, Brenda’s lips were thinning.  The woman hated drinking and Gwen could already tell that a drinking game would lead to a row between her and Mary.  Still, it might be the only way to keep everyone occupied and away from whatever it was Jack was up to.

Weevils.  Of course there were bloody Weevils surrounding the pub she’d picked for her hen.

“Regular formation,” Jack called as he and Owen came up to the hen party.  Gwen glared at him, taking a place beside Ianto far away from Jack. It wasn’t his fault the Weevils were around, of course, but she couldn’t help blaming somebody for her ruined night.

“Okay, we’ve got a gas leak out front here.  If everyone could please make their way through the back exit, quickly and quietly, we’ll get it sorted.”  Already, Ianto was on top of crowd control, evacuating the pub.  Gwen’s mother was staring at her as she was forced to leave, trying to ask what the hell sort of special ops dealt with gas leaks.  Gwen turned away.

“What exactly is going on here?”  Mary Cooper had slipped back into the building, glaring at her daughter.

“That’s exactly the question I was about to ask,” Brenda Williams said from Gwen’s other side, otherwise ignoring Mary.

“Ladies,” Jack smiled widely, holding his arms out.  “I am not privy to divulge that information.  But I’m afraid that you’re just going to have to trust Gwen – and the rest of us – to do our jobs and keep you safe.”  Mary and Brenda – as graciously as they could under the circumstances – accepted the proffered gestures and allowed him to lead them away from the smoking rubble.  Owen frowned.

“You lot are in no condition to help with this.  Here, take one of these and go straight to bed when you get home.”  He gave each of them a tiny pill, advising them not to take it until they were in bed.  Gwen pocketed the pill and called a taxi.

The drive home was quiet, each lost in their own thoughts.

{Gwen} Balancing Torchwood with regular life was becoming more and more difficult.  True, she had Rhys, but what about everybody else? What happened if they were caught in the middle of something again?  She didn’t want to Retcon her family – not even Brenda Williams – if she didn’t have to, and… that was about as far as she could think, given her intoxicated state of mind.

{Tosh} She wondered if Jack would let her bring somebody into her life, the way he’d let Gwen keep Rhys in hers.  He and Ianto had each other, after all, and Owen…well, like Gwen had said, Owen was a prat if he didn’t see what was literally right in front of him.

{Ianto} ‘Strictly speaking’, their unlabelled ‘relationship’ needed a label.  His entire life was filled with keeping things organized and sorted and to have this major… whatever it was with Jack unlabelled was slowly driving the archivist in him mad.  Everything else in his life was sorted, filed, stored away – be it in the Archives or the Tourist Office at the Hub or in his flat.  As much as he enjoyed their not-relationship, he felt as though there was a chasm waiting to be crossed, a transition waiting to happen. And he didn’t know if he was ready for that or if he was tired of waiting for it to happen.

[blueboxesandtrafficcones]

The Nuptial Necessity - Chapter 32

A 12xRose Human AU

Despite an unglamorous job description, Rose loves the work she does with The Thistle Foundation, a charity founded by her best friend’s great-uncle.  It doesn’t hurt that her boss, her friend’s father, is easy on the eyes.  With a great job, wonderful friends and a loving family, life couldn’t be better – except for having someone to share it with.

All of that is threatened, though, when the great-uncle dies – and sets a strange condition for his nephew to inherit, jeopardizing the Foundation and Rose’s future, sparking a chain of events that might just get her everything she dreamed of and more.

Chapters will be posted on Saturdays and Tuesdays.  Many thanks to my beta, @stupidsatsuma

Rated: Explicit, for smut

@doctorroseprompts

AO3  |  Masterlist

—

Saturday morning

The trilling coming from the nightstand woke her, and with an annoyed whine Rose stretched out her arm, searching blindly for the offending mobile.  Finding it she brought it to her face, prying one eye open to read the display – it wasn’t quite half seven, and it was an incoming call from Clara.

“Who’s it?” her husband mumbled against the back of her neck, wrapped tightly around her, and she pressed back against him.

“Clara.”

His panicked “Rose, no,” came too late- she’d already swiped to answer the call, Clara’s face filling the screen for a FaceTime call instead of the voice-only Rose had expected.

The small box in the corner showing what Clara was seeing told Rose that her best friend would be able to see (and unable to deny) that Rose and Malcolm were in bed together.  Oops.  “Erm, hi, Clar,” Rose offered half-heartedly, wriggling the fingers of her free hand in a wave.  “What’s up?”

“Please tell me you’re not in the middle of having sex,” the brunette said faintly, and to Rose’s further embarrassment Danny’s face immediately popped up behind Clara, his eyes widening for just a moment before he disappeared off screen again.

“We were sleeping,” Malcolm rolled his eyes, his arm wrapping tighter around Rose’s waist.  “Did you need something?”

Clara still appeared stunned, eyes wide and unblinking, mouth slightly open.  “We usually talk at this time,” she managed.  “It’s Saturday.  I assumed you’d be up- awake!  I thought you’d be awake.”  She shook her head.  “I don’t understand.”

Rose bit her lip, glancing over her shoulder at Malcolm, who nodded encouragingly.  “We… we’re together.  We talked it out and- we’re together.”

“Properly together or fuck-buddies together?”

“Clara!” Malcolm protested.  “Really.”

Rose elbowed him, smiling nervously.  “Properly together.  In all the gooey, mushy, lovestruck glory of a forever kind of love together.”

She waited for Clara’s response, anxious – though throughout everything Clara had seemed on board with the idea, had encouraged them both, at the moment of reckoning Rose worried she wouldn’t take it well.

“But you are shagging?”

“Clar.”

A wide smile spread over Clara’s face, and she began to squeal.  “Oh, really?  Really really really?”  She clapped in delight, turning to yell over her shoulder, “They’re in love!”

Danny’s off-camera reply of “No shit” just made them all laugh.

“Oh, I’m so happy for you,” Clara gushed, leaning forward towards her mobile as if that would bring her closer to them.  “Last we talked you weren’t sure how he felt – what happened?  Tell me everything.”

-

He found her in the kitchen of all places, perched on a barstool at the island next to Jack rifling through a familiar box, most of its contents spread on the countertop while across from them, Ianto worked diligently on building a veritable tower of sandwiches for them to take with them.

“Having fun jewelry shopping?” Malcolm asked, sidling up beside her, but judging by the way she jumped and looked up guiltily, his teasing tone hadn’t come through.

“I wanted to bring Clara something, after the way she found out.  If that’s okay,” she fumbled, peering up at him, and he smiled back in response.

“Oh, sweetheart.”  He brushed a tendril of hair from her face.  “This is all yours as much as it is mine – I was only teasing.  Have what you like, and if you want to give it to Clara, that’s perfectly fine and a wonderful idea.  Have you picked anything yet?”  Tearing his gaze from her he surveyed the countertop, covered in rings and necklaces mostly, gems sparkling in the industrial lighting Jack had installed as they were technically in the basement.

Relaxing back against him she showed him the few pieces she was considering, and when he pointed to one he thought his daughter might rather like, confessed it was her top contender as well.

“What about me, don’t I deserve something pretty?” Jack wanted to know, making Malcolm roll his eyes as Rose carefully returned the other jewelry pieces to the box, selection made.

“You’re the custodian of this place- how would I know what you do with it when I’m not here?” he shot back, arching an eyebrow at his cousin.  “In fact, I’d prefer not to know what you get up to, knowing you.”  His eyes cut to Ianto, who was doing a poor job of hiding a smirk, though he didn’t look up.

Shaking his head, he slipped an arm around Rose’s waist so she had to lean back and tilt her head up to see him.  “Ready to hit the road, sweetheart?”

She nodded, before scrunching up her face.  “Maybe one last walk through the house and gardens first, yeah?”

“I would love nothing more.”

-

They strolled hand in hand, and Rose did her best to soak up everything before they left, only realizing now how little of the house she’d seen.  “I am a little sorry to be leaving so soon,” she confessed, as they stepped out into the garden.  “Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled about our little tour, but I feel I didn’t get enough time here.”

“Well, we can return anytime you wish,” he shrugged.  “It’s not that expensive to come up.  Or we could even drive once, stay over on our way up.  Sightsee in England as well.”

“I love that idea.  Maybe I watch too much American telly, but the idea of a road trip always seemed so romantic.”  She leaned her head against his bicep.  “Have I mentioned lately how happy I am, with you?”

He let go of her hand to wrap his arm around her waist, pulling her tighter against him.  “No happier than I am to have you.  I’ve been dreaming of this, of being with you, for… a few years now.  I never thought it would happen, could happen, but I’m so happy it has.”

“I’ve loved you for so long,” she murmured in reply, slipping her hand around his back beneath his jacket.  “It still feels unreal to be able to tell you that.”

“Can you believe it’s only been a week?”  His hand slid down from her waist to her hip, dangerously close to being a (very welcome) grope.  “Last Saturday at this time we were getting ready for the Gala, and I thought the night would be perfect if I could hold you for several dances.  I had no idea what was to come, but I’m so happy it did.”

Rose smiled, thinking back to that night – how nervous she’d been, how she’d worried that he might reject her.  If only she’d known…  “I did.”

“What?”  He looked down at her, startled, and she laughed.

“It didn’t just happen.  I spent all week wrestling with myself, but I decided to shoot my shot as the cool kids say.  I deliberately seduced you.”  It was fun, watching the emotions play across his face as he digested that, and she was quietly relieved when he settled on stunned delight.

“Really?”

She nodded.  “Yep.  And, you’ll love this – it was Clara’s idea.  She encouraged me.  Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to- wanted you- but she convinced me I wouldn’t be making a fool of myself.”

“Clara?  My Clara?”  He looked adorably indignant, spluttering slightly.  “I don’t know if I should be grateful or annoyed at her interference.”  Then his brow furrowed.  “How, exactly, did you seduce me?”

“I’m sorry, did you see me in that dress?”

“And out of it.”  He smirked.  “You were stunning.”

“Damn right.  That was the point – I wanted your hands on my skin.  And I knew it was going to happen the moment you saw me and did your best impression of a fish.  And then you said fuck me.”  She smiled at the memory.  “So I did.”

He stopped walking then, turning to her, and then his mouth was on hers, tongue easing past parted lips, and she sagged into him, savoring the freedom to adore him, to let her heart sing with love.

“Thank you,” he whispered against her lips, when they finally pulled back for air.  Her brain was foggy, everything forgotten but for the taste of him.  Her befuddlement must have shown on her face because he chuckled, pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose.  “For being brave enough,” he elaborated.  “I’m not sure I would have ever gotten up the courage to try my luck with you- I was too afraid of losing you.  I’d convinced myself I’d be happier in the long run pining for you with the possibility hanging over my head than if I asked and you turned me down.”

Rose smiled up at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning closer, glancing around the estate – they were alone in the garden, with a wonderful view of the back of the house, and she thought wistfully of the previous owner.  “I think we have Wallace to thank, really,” she murmured.  “He saw the truth, apparently, and got tired of watching us stand off to the side, too afraid to jump – so he pushed us.”

He dipped his head to kiss her, a small miracle that grew more familiar with every press of lips, though the familiarity did not lessen the impact he had on her – quickened heartbeat, shallow breaths, and an overwhelming desire to find the nearest flat surface.  Not that the last bit was anything particularly new, he had often unknowingly elicited such a response in her, but now, now, she knew he would be in enthusiastic favor of such a diversion.

The future was ripe with possibilities.

-

“We’ll have to keep in touch,” Rose enthused, hugging Sarah Jane goodbye.  It was finally time to go, and the woman had been kind enough to come see them off.  “I have your email, and I’ll write you once we’re home.”

“And call,” the older woman ordered, squeezing her tightly.  “I want to hear all about your tour.  Well, most of it.  No, all of it.”

They shared a smirk that made Malcolm’s ears go red and Jack cough in a poor attempt to hide a laugh.

“We’ve a lot of driving to do today…” her husband tried to hurry them along, trying to shift Rose using his hands around her waist.  “Time to go.”

Rose resisted, though, going in for one more hug.  “Next time we come we’ll bring Clara,” she promised on the fly.  “So you can meet properly.  She’d love to hear your stories about your days in uni- especially if they involve her.”

“There’s plenty of those,” Sarah Jane laughed in response.  “Not all of them are ones she’ll want to hear, though.”

“In that case, I have to hear them.”

Then it was time to say goodbye to Jack, and overcome by an unexpected wave of emotion, Rose buried her face in the man’s broad shoulder.  “I’m going to miss you,” she mumbled.  “I’m so glad we got a chance to get to know one another.”

“So am I,” he said kindly as they pulled away, before glancing over her shoulder at Malcolm.  “Don’t be strangers – we’re family.”

“We’ll be back,” Rose repeated, wiping at her eyes.  “Thank you for everything.”

“Jack,” Malcolm said somewhat stiffly, as Rose leaned into his side, holding out his hand to his cousin.

“My Lord,” the younger man said in reply, before breaking into a smile.  “C’mere.”  The two men hugged, Rose watching on with a watery smile.  “So, where’s the first stop?”

Having played a large part in planning their itinerary, it was an obvious ploy to keep them there a little longer.  Malcolm knew it as well, but indulged the delay.  “Walk through the Old Town in Inverness, stop for lunch.  Rose wants to see Culloden, then we’ll drive along the coast down to Aberdeen, stopping along the way as she likes.”

Jack nodded, lips pressed together tightly, a hint of moisture in his eyes.  “A fine plan,” he managed.  “Travel safe.”

With one more hug it was time to go, Malcolm helping Rose up into the canary-yellow roadster before jogging around to the driver’s side.  She waved as they drove off until they were out of sight, before settling back in her seat and resting her head on her husband’s shoulder.

“We’ll be back soon enough,” he promised, taking one hand off the wheel to pat at her knee.  “There’s lots more to Scotland to explore.”

She nodded, watching the town of Bonnar Bridge fly past, before sitting bolt upright, eyes widening.  “Hey!”

“What?”

“How come we’ve been in Scotland for a week and I have yet to see you in a kilt?”

He laughed, the sound bright and cheerful, before shaking his head.  “I’ve one in my bag, I can try it on for you later if you like,” he offered, grinning.

“Good.  I want to find out for myself if it’s true.”

“If what’s true?”

Her smile widened, hand landing on his knee before sliding upwards.  “What you do- or don’t- wear under that thing.”

“Rose Tyler!”

[speakofgrace]

worship || janto || 3.8k || ao3

None of the team knew what to say after watching John beam away. Gwen had two almost deaths to process, and she sat stock still in the passenger seat, trembling with the adrenaline.

Ianto walked her inside, Jack calling after them to make sure Rhys didn’t make any phone calls. There was a good chance they’d go to the other Gwen, still living through this hellish night.

Gwen just nodded; eyes blank. She turned Ianto away before they reached her door, and Ianto wanted to protest, but he understood. Rhys would have questions, and she was in no state to be answering them. He gave her a squeeze, and turned away, hearing the downturn in Rhys’s voice as he transitioned from happy to worried.

Some part of him missed being loved like that.

* * *

Back in the car, Jack had moved to the driver’s seat. Tosh and Owen sat in the back, still in heavy silence.

No-one could even begin to know what to say.

Jack drove to Owen’s place, then Toshiko’s. Saw them off with kind, gentle words. Told Tosh to get some sleep. Told Owen not to drink too much. Owen gave him a smile, at that. Shook Jack’s hand.

It didn’t really make sense to leave Ianto’s until last, but Ianto didn’t point it out. He hoped, desperately, that Jack wanted to talk.

He stared straight ahead as Jack parked, trying not to give himself away.

“Can I come in?” Jack asked, and Ianto breathed out. “Of course.” He was too tired to try and be coy. He would listen, and he would say what he meant, and then he would get some sleep.

Ianto fumbled a little with the lock, his body keyed-up and nervous. Jack stood ever so slightly too close, and Ianto had almost forgotten just how warm he was, how good he always smelled.

“Go sit down,” Ianto said as he closed the door behind them. Normally, they’d be kissing by now, Jack’s body pushing him back against a wall, Ianto’s hands working at Jack’s buttons.

“I missed this place,” Jack said, quiet, and Ianto let himself pretend that Jack meant “I missed you.”

“I’m going to make tea,” Ianto said. “Want some?” “I suppose it’s too late for coffee.” Jack smiled, and nodded. “Milk and two sugars?” Ianto asked, like he hadn’t committed it to memory, like he hadn’t been haunted by memories of their intimate moments for the last three months. “Yes.”

* * *

Ianto had spent too much time carrying full mugs to let his hands shake, but he felt like a slight breeze might knock him to pieces. Jack sat upright and stiff, still wearing his coat; it was a staggering contrast from how he usually looked on Ianto’s couch.

“Thank you.” Jack said, picking up his mug. Ianto had always preferred coffee, but there was an awful lot to be said for the calming properties of a strong cup of tea. Especially tea with a shot of whiskey. He left his cup on the coffee table, watching the curl and flicker of the steam. “I meant what I said before,” Jack almost whispered, and Ianto looked over at him. “About offices?” Ianto tried to smile, tried to pretend he wasn’t terrified of what Jack might be about to tell him. “No.” Jack gave a strained little smile of his own. “About coming back for you.” “For all of us.” Ianto finished for him, focussing once more on his tea. He brought it to his lips, blowing and watching the ripples on the surface. “No, for you.” Jack put a hand on Ianto’s arm, and Ianto was suddenly achingly aware of the space between them on his couch. “I care about the others, of course, but I meant it when I said I came back for you.”

Ianto inhaled very, very carefully. “Where were you, Jack?” “With the Doctor. It’s a very long story.” “We have time.”

Jack sighed, put down his cup and twisted his hands together. “From where I’m standing, I’ve been gone a year. How long was it for you?” “About three months,” Ianto replied, like he didn’t know to the day. “Did he take you somewhere nice?” “What?” Jack looked baffled. “While you were time travelling. Did your Doctor take you somewhere nice.” It wasn’t a question. “No. And I wasn’t really time travelling.” “Oh.” “The Doctor didn’t come back for me. I had to chase him down.” Jack bundled his fingers into his coat, “That’s why I left without saying goodbye.” Ianto swallowed. He’d been assuming Jack had gone off to be happy, and had taken some comfort in that. “He didn’t even let me inside. I grabbed the outside of the TARDIS as it was about to take off, and it flew to the end of the Universe to try and get rid of me.” Ianto put down his tea, and reached for Jack’s hand, watching his face in case he would flinch away.

He didn’t. He held on tight.

“He’s a bastard who doesn’t deserve you, then.” Jack laughed, weak. “It wasn’t him; it really was the TARDIS.” Jack sniffed. “The Doctor can’t fix me, but he did tell me what was wrong.” Jack fell silent, and Ianto waited; words would only snap the fragile trust Jack was placing in him. “Do you know anything about Rose Tyler? She would’ve been with him, at Canary Wharf.” “A little.” Ianto had heard her mentioned afterwards, had seen it on the memorial. “Well, she was with the Doctor, when we used to travel together. It’s a long story, but I died, and she brought me back. Except she was a bit out of control, and now I’m back forever.” “Oh my god,” Ianto whispered. “People aren’t supposed to be fixed points, and the TARDIS didn’t like it. Neither did the Doctor.” Ianto had never met the man, but between the stories from Torchwood One (even though he tried to tell himself that most of them were exaggerated), and what he was hearing now, he felt pretty safe in thinking that he was, in fact, a bit of a bastard. “He must’ve known that, at the time,” said Ianto. “Why did he leave you behind?” “Because he knew.” A tear slipped down Jack’s face, glinting in the gentle light of the lamp in the corner. “He couldn’t bear to look at me. His words.”

Ianto ached. The Doctor must have known how Jack felt; for all his secrecy, he wore his emotions on his sleeve. How could you tell someone who loved you that you couldn’t stand the sight of them? “He’s wrong.” Ianto said, squeezing Jack’s hand. “It’s not his fault,” Jack said, voice catching. “I upset his senses.” Ianto opened his mouth to protest, but Jack turned to look at him, and cut him off, “Anyway, that’s not the important bit. The important bit is when we got to the end of the Universe, we found another Timelord. But this one was evil, and he was mad.” Jack wrapped his other hand around Ianto’s, inching a little closer. “Do you remember Harold Saxon?” “Wait, that mad bloke who reckoned he was going to show us first contact? He’s a Timelord?” “Yes. Well, he was. He’s dead now. Anyway.” Jack breathed, “This is where it gets tricky. As far as I’m concerned, his plan worked.” Ianto moved closer too, their hands clasped together and Jack’s thigh just resting against his own. He was always so warm. “The Master, that’s his real name, brought the descendants of humanity from the end of the Universe. He stole the TARDIS, and turned it into a paradox machine. They came through time in the millions, and started killing as many people as they could.”

Jack shuddered, and didn’t stop, his hands trembling against Ianto’s. What kind of hell had Jack been through?

“The Master was furious that I couldn’t die. He kept me in chains that whole year, used me as a punching bag. He could torture me however he wanted, for as long as he wanted, and there would never be any consequences.”

Ianto curled his fingers into Jack’s hair, pulled his head down until it was against Ianto’s chest. “You’re safe now,” he whispered, daring to let himself press his lips against the top of Jack’s head. “We stopped it. Well, Martha did. I broke the paradox machine, and time snapped back to just before those murderous little bastards came through. The year that never was.” Ianto couldn’t even begin to know what to say. He just held on to Jack, hoping that he could give at least a shred of comfort. “The Doctor asked me to travel with him,” Jack’s voice was a little muffled, part of his face pressed against Ianto’s jacket. “Why didn’t you go with him? Isn’t that what you wanted?” “No. Not after all that. Maybe not even before.” “What do you mean?”

Jack sat up again. Ianto almost reached to pull him back, but Jack rubbed his eyes, took a deep breath; he needed to think. “I’ve been waiting for the Doctor for more than a century. I loved him at the start of it, I know that, and I kept loving him for a long time. But when you have to wait that long, you tell yourself you love them, even if maybe you don’t, not the way you used to. You have to, or what’s the point?”

Jack’s eyes shone. God, he was so beautiful, even like this.

“When we were dealing with Abaddon, you saw Lisa, right?” “Yeah.” “Everyone saw someone they loved; someone they’d lost. I should’ve seen the Doctor, but I didn’t.” Jack took Ianto’s hand again, held it like something precious. “When I saw the Doctor again, he was different. He wasn’t my Doctor, the one I’d travelled with. And when I was the Master’s chew toy, it wasn’t him that got me through it.” Ianto held his breath. He often had a pretty good idea of what Jack was about to say, but he couldn’t be right this time, surely? Jack reached up with his other hand, cupped Ianto’s cheek. “It was you. The thought of you.” Ianto closed his eyes; Jack’s touch so, so warm and so good. “I didn’t want to stay with the Doctor. I wanted to see you.”

It wasn’t “I love you”, but Ianto didn’t need that. He wasn’t even sure what he felt for Jack himself. But he knew he’d never felt this way about anyone before, and that he was so overwhelmed with something that he could burst.

When he opened his eyes, Jack looked so open and vulnerable Ianto almost couldn’t bear it. “Kiss me,” he whispered, and brought his hand up to hold Jack’s against his face. Jack grabbed Ianto’s shoulder with his other hand, pulled him forward oh so gently, kissing him soft and sweet. Ianto pressed himself against Jack, grabbing his lapels as leverage. “I missed you,” Ianto whispered, their foreheads pressed together, breaths mingling hot between their mouths. “Show me,” Jack said, pressing their lips together again. Ianto pushed forward, half standing and tipping Jack back against the cushions until he could press their bodies together completely. Jack’s coat fell open around him, and Ianto snaked his arms inside, pushing his hands underneath Jack’s back. Jack clutched at Ianto’s head, slipping his fingers under the back of Ianto’s collar, tugging him down and down and down. “Come to bed?” Ianto said, voice husky. “Buy me a drink first,” Jack replied, and Ianto almost burst out laughing. “There’s a perfectly good cup of tea right there. I can wait for you to finish it, if you really want.” Ianto moved to sit up, but Jack grabbed at him, pulled him closer. “No.” This kiss was somehow tender and rough all at once, Jack’s tongue darting insistently against Ianto’s lips. Ianto gave in, like always, arching down against Jack, twisting to press kisses against Jack’s neck. “Come to bed,” he said again, his words muffled against Jack’s skin. God, the way he smelled had always made Ianto flustered, but right now, after being deprived of it for three months, he felt almost drunk on it.

Jack sat up, and Ianto pushed his coat off his shoulders, loathe to let go of Jack even for a moment. Jack returned the gesture, tugging Ianto out of his jacket sleeves, tossing it on the back of the couch, and didn’t stop kissing him once. “Come on then,” Jack said between kisses, and Ianto whined as Jack pulled him upright, tugging them back together again, his thigh angling just so between Ianto’s legs. He grabbed Ianto’s arse, and tugged.

Ianto hissed, and pulled back to see Jack looking far, far too pleased with himself. He leaned forward, ready to melt that smirk with his mouth, but then he had another idea. Probably not a good one, and he would regret it in the morning, but right then, he didn’t care. He stepped back, tucking his arm behind Jack’s knees and sweeping him off his feet.

He was certainly heavier than Lisa, but it was a short trip to the bedroom, and it was more than worth it for the look of delighted surprise on Jack’s face. “You sure know how to make a guy feel special,” Jack was smiling now, big and proper and beautiful, and something inside Ianto lurched. “It’s what you deserve.” He laid Jack gently on the bed, wincing when he saw that Jack still had his boots on. Still, that could be fixed, and he set too it, before tugging Jack gently upright to shrug his suspenders off his broad shoulders. “Let me take care of you,” Ianto said, soft, fingers going to work on Jack’s shirt buttons. “Let me make you feel good.” “Please,” Jack almost whined, eyes slipping shut. Ianto hastily unbuttoned his own shirt, desperate to get his hands on Jack’s skin.

He meant to undress Jack completely, but the time it took him to get them both shirtless was too long not kissing Jack, and he leaned over him again, pressing their bodies together and relishing in the heat of Jack’s skin, Jack’s hands roaming his back. “God,” Ianto hissed, giving in and pushing his hips down, grunting as Jack squeezed his arse. Heat was pulsing through him, radiating slowly from all the points where Jack touched him, the currents of it colliding and overlapping until he was full to bursting.

Ianto made himself pull away, made himself leave the honey-warmth of Jack’s embrace to finish undressing him, because Ianto had a job to do, and he intended to do it properly. “You’re so beautiful,” he said, looking down at Jack’s naked body. It was perfect, skin smooth and flawless and glowing in the dim lamplight. Ianto leaned down once again, and set about kissing every single inch of that skin. He started with Jack’s lips, lingering there for what could’ve been an hour, pressing and pushing and exploring with his tongue until Jack’s lips looked like overripe berries, glossy with dew.

Satisfied, he began his journey, trailing his lips along the line of Jack’s jaw, sucking a little at the hinge, before truly feasting on his neck. He lingered there, too, kissing and touching and sucking, but still so careful. He could not, would not leave a bruise. There would be no pain here.

He trailed his fingers along the lines of Jack’s collarbones, pressing careful kisses to the hollow in between, the place where they met his shoulders. Jack’s eyes were closed, his fingers tracing slow, smudgy lines along Ianto’s torso. Ianto pressed his hands against Jack’s biceps, shifting downwards once more to press kisses against Jack’s sternum, the flutter of his heart.

When Ianto was a child, he’d dreamed of travelling, of exploring the whole world until there was nothing more for him to see. That had never quite worked out, but some of that sense of wonder came back to him now, as he explored and mapped the crests and valleys of Jack’s ribs, the firm plain of his belly. Jack was silent, breaths hitching in time with Ianto’s mouth, but that wouldn’t do. Ianto traced a river with his fingers, following with his mouth to the mountain of Jack’s hip bone, and sucked. Jack’s breath hitched a little louder, the barest hint of a moan trailing behind it. “That’s better,” Ianto said. “Wanna hear you.” He traced his fingers down the line of Jack’s pelvis, carefully avoiding the treasure that was waiting at the end, and Jack whined, loud and disgruntled. “Stop teasing,” he said, voice croaky. “Not teasing,” Ianto said. “I’m worshipping.” And that was a dangerous, dangerous thing to say. They never talked about how they felt, danced around the topic like ballerinas, but Jack’s confession had made Ianto reckless. He’d always been jealous of the Doctor, but he had won.

Jack didn’t really seem to notice Ianto’s words, instead tossing his head back as Ianto kissed a delicate line down the inside of his thigh. Ianto hummed, fingers trailing the curves and lines of muscle, building fresh memories on the foundations of the ones that had been tormenting him in Jack’s absence. Jack’s body sat in such a perfect in-between space. He was broad and strong, but somehow still delicate, the lines of his muscles only peeking through the silk of his skin. He took his time here, too, scattering kisses like flower petals.

“Ianto, please.” Jack moaned, tangling his fingers in Ianto’s hair and pulling him up, crushing their lips together, and tugging Ianto’s hips flush against his own. Jack rolled his hips up like a wave, the crash of it against Ianto fizzing and bubbling through his insides like seafoam. “Want me to fuck you?” Ianto nearly growled, the drag of Jack’s cock against his own making him almost dizzy. “God, yes.” Ianto fumbled for the bottle in his bedside table, trailing his mouth down the curves of Jack’s torso once more, before finally giving in, trailing kisses up the length of Jack’s cock. Jack tugged at his hair again, and Ianto took the hint this time, sealing his lips around Jack and swallowing the length of him down, hot and heavy against his tongue.

Like everything else, he took his time opening Jack up, his fingers twisting in an almost leisurely way while he fisted Jack’s cock in his other hand. Normally, Ianto would’ve given in to Jack’s impatience by now, Jack telling him he liked the stretch and burn. But not tonight. Ianto refused to let Jack experience even the slightest discomfort, not after everything he had been through.

Instead, he took Jack apart slowly, trailing yet more kisses around the curve of Jack’s hips and thighs, fingers gentle inside him. He fisted Jack’s cock, trailing his lips back up to the crater of his collarbone, relishing in every little gasp and grunt and moan he could draw out of Jack’s perfect, perfect mouth.

“Ianto.” He’d always loved the way Jack said his name. He’d never met anyone else who said it like that. He curled his fingers up, just a touch, tossing a log onto the fire burning in his own body as Jack tensed and whimpered. “Ianto, I don’t wanna come like this.” Jack almost babbled, hands fisting in the sheets. “Wanna come on your cock.”

And that was Ianto done for. He pulled back, arranging himself between Jack’s legs, and the brief touch of his own fingers as he lined himself up sent a shockwave through his body. He pressed his other hand against the curve of Jack’s hipbone, pushing forwards with his eyes on Jack’s face.

Jack’s eyes fluttered closed, and Ianto leaned forward as his hips pressed home against Jack’s thighs, curving over him to press a kiss to each of his closed eyelids. “Look at me,” he whispered, pressing their foreheads together, and Jack opened his eyes, sky blue gone thunder-dark. “So beautiful,” Ianto whispered, still reckless, “so, so good.” Jack didn’t say anything, just traced his hands down and down, settled them against Ianto’s hips, and pulled, just a little. A reminder.

Ianto moaned loud, wrapping an arm around Jack’s thigh as he surged forward, the heat coursing through him burning even hotter.

Jack clutched his face in both hands, pressing long, desperate kisses against Ianto’s lips, an exquisite counterpoint to the rhythm of Ianto’s thrusts, slow and heavy and deliberate. Jack traced his thumb over the curve of Ianto’s cheekbone, and Ianto almost froze, shocked at the intimacy of it. “Don’t you dare stop,” Jack said, voice cracking as a moan broke through his speech.

Ianto didn’t think he could. His body was buzzing with heat, and a stone rolled loose in his ribcage, the beginning of a landslide. He wrapped a hand around Jack’s cock, twisting his wrist just the way Jack liked, the cascade in his body tumbling down and down and down, the heat in his guts coiling like a spring. Jack let out a muffled moan against his lips, and Ianto’s hips sped up of their own volition, the earthquake in him shaking his very core as he came hard, as Jack’s cock twitched in his hand, yet more heat spurting over his fingers. Jack keened, and Ianto covered the sound with his lips, swallowing it into his own mouth where he could keep it. He collapsed on top of Jack, hips stuttering through the aftershocks of the tremor, his mouth pressed almost absently to Jack’s neck.

“Fuck,” Jack said, and Ianto smiled against his skin. Jack almost never swore, and it was always so fun when he did. “That is what I did, yes.” Ianto forced himself upright, clumping tissues into his hand to at least give a semblance of cleaning Jack up. Jack let out a little huff, apparently too exhausted to laugh properly. “And you do it very well.” Ianto preened at the praise, collapsing down next to Jack once more and bundling Jack into his arms. Jack would never admit it, but he loved being the little spoon, and Ianto was more than happy to oblige him. “I really did miss you.” Ianto said against the nape of Jack’s neck, watching his hair flutter with Ianto’s breath. “I missed you too.” Jack tangled their fingers together. He was always very tactile, but this seemed different, somehow. Less about comfort and more about closeness. Ianto pressed a kiss to the back of Jack’s neck and closed his eyes. There were more things to talk about, things far more complicated even that what Jack had told him already, but for now, this was enough. It was enough to lie with Jack in his bed, in his arms, pressed flush against him. It was enough that Jack was here.

[agent-jones]

Why Gwen Hate Is Rooted In Misogyny And How The Premise Of Torchwood Is Often Ignored In Order To Hate On Her

Hello, hi. Jacklynn here again to talk your head off about something I feel is important to address when it comes to Torchwood and its fandom. Now, you’ve seen me post my defence of her and her actions [ not condoning, always remember this ] but, this is more on why the hate she receives is absolutely rooted in misogyny whether you want to believe it is or not, especially when talking about the portrayal and reception of women over the years in media [ and, frankly, in society ] as well as the fact that Torchwood’s very premise explains why Gwen should not be so vitriolically hated by the fans.

First, let’s talk about one reason she’s hated: her personality. Oh. This one is just blatant. I’ve seen her called both boring AND bitchy. The first one is obvious to address and that’s the bitchy one. Women who are seen as strong and independent are often labelled as bitchy, while men who act in the same manner are respected and good leaders. This is just simply based on the patriarchy we live in, a woman must be docile and and quiet and if she’s stands for something she believes in, suddenly she’s considered loud and angry and a bitch. How many times have we heard those words thrown at feminists for standing up for women? And boring? If a woman isn’t shown to be fun all the time and up for anything [ see the movie Yes, Man and Zooey’s character ] she’s considered boring. This isn’t just Gwen, this has always been the world women are forced to live in: either you’re a slut or you’re a prude, you’re a bitch or you’re just boring. Comments like that about Gwen’s personality are just downright rooted in the everyday sexism women face in society.

Second, the double standard within the Torchwood fandom when it comes to Gwen’s affair. Cheating on Rhys is the number one reason I always see for Gwen hate. And you know what? It’s absolutely valid to criticise her on how she treated Rhys. It was selfish and she made bad decisions. But, you know what’s never addressed? The fact that Owen knew exactly what he was doing when he was tempting Gwen away from Rhys, purposefully trying to get her to cheat on him. He was very open about the fact that he “tortures people in happy relationships” because he wants to. But, he’s given a free pass for his actions. Why? Had the roles been reversed and Owen’s character was a woman, and Gwen’s a man, Owen’s character would have been considered a ‘homewrecking slut’ who didn’t care about the fact that the man she went after was in a relationship and would have been labelled as such and would have been crucified by the fandom as Gwen was for cheating.

Why? Why is Owen excused for his actions? He was far from innocent. Yes, it is ultimately Gwen’s relationahip, but it takes two to tango. Owen should be disliked just as much for purposefully intending to cause harm to Rhys and not caring for a single moment about the consequences of his actions.

Jack is also given a free pass when it comes to the Gwack stuff. I never understood why people claim that Gwen ‘threw herself at Jack’ when almost every scene which implied Gwack, Jack is the one making moves. He’s the one who does the sexy gun lesson, he’s the one who corners her in the cells and does version two of ‘I came back for you,’ he’s the one sending longing glances at her as she’s kissing Rhys. And yes, these things are returned. But, once again Jack is given a free pass when he knows Gwen is in a relationship and yet does not have the decency to honour that either.

So are we seeing the pattern when it comes to the biggest reason Gwen is hated? The men are given free passes and loved while the woman is given all the blame. Each one made their choices and none of them were good. So why does the fandom only punish the woman?

Also, I would like to quickly address that she also gets hate for ‘getting in the way of Jack and Ianto’ which A. Is absolutely untrue, she never once tries to get Jack to choose her over Ianto, never acts like it’s a competition, is never once anything but sweet to Ianto. She is supportive of them and is never canonically attempting to get between them. B. Is pretty damn close to fetishism and blaming women for ‘getting in the way of your m/m ship’ needs to be re-examined.

Now, as I mentioned above, the premise of the show is often ignored in order to hate on Gwen. RTD has stated that Torchwood is about flawed and real human beings trying to save the world. They are not outright heroes, and they never claim to be. They are doing their best but they are all still human.

Human beings make mistakes. Human beings have emotional reactions that are irrational. Human beings do bad things for selfish reasons. Human beings can be inherently good people who made bad decisions and they can also be inherently bad people who do good things some times. Human beings are flawed and that’s the point of the show.

Gwen was not written to be the antithesis to this. She was written as an outsider coming into this new world and quickly learning how it changes you and affects you and can even bring our your more human traits. She was simply brought in to bring a new perspective for the team, not because she’s better than them.

But, so often this premise of real human beings trying to save the world and do what they can is ignored in order to hate Gwen. She’s just as flawed as everyone else, she’s not more flawed or any worse than anyone else on the team. But, their flaws are either ignored or brushed off in order to love them.

Ianto is the fandom golden child. I get it. I adore him with my whole heart. But, he manipulated everyone on the team, emotionally manipulated Jack, used the team in order to do what he had to to save Lisa. He got innocent people killed. He’s been shown to resort to killing when it felt needed. He has a dark side and he is not without his own flaws. He betrayed Jack twice and then went behind his back again in Adrift. He is not perfect. He is good, but he is human and makes mistakes.

Owen is a self-proclaimed twat who spends the entirety of series one purposefully trying to get Gwen to cheat on her boyfriend, being an absolute dick to Tosh. Not to mention he full on date r**** two people in the first episode. He also betrays Jack and nearly ends the world trying to do what he thought was right. Owen makes mistakes. He does really fucked up shit, but that’s what Torchwood is isn’t it? He’s fucked up but he does what he can to save the world. We love him for his growth and don’t let his mistakes make him hated by the fandom.

Tosh isn’t perfect either. She invaded her teammates’ inner most private thoughts and brought an alien into Torchwood. Yes, she was manipulated into it, but she listened in on Gwen and Owen because she was jealous. Jealousy and pettiness are very much shown within Tosh’s character. From the comments she makes to Gwen about getting her feet under the table, to invading their privacy to her tension about Martha. Tosh made mistakes and she has some not very nice qualities to her personality. But, we love her because she’s Torchwood and she’s good and we can forgive her mistakes because she’s human.

Jack lived a conman’s life. He’s resorted to killing before asking questions, he’s physically tortured peopl. Jack refused to let his team know a single thing about him and kept them in the dark when the truth could have helped everyone. He abandoned them and for a long time was only using Torchwood as a way to wait for the Doctor to come back and he would leave. He makes decisions that other people wouldn’t, he tells Gwen to keep a hold of her life with Rhys but would have been the first in line to sleep with her had she asked him to. But, we love Jack because he is Jack Harkness and he cares and he does so much to save the world and takes so much weight on his shoulders. He is a flawed human being doing what he can to do good and we forgive him because we know he’s trying.

The other team members get the forgiveness of the premise of the show, and yet Gwen doesn’t. Why? She’s just as much part of the team and while she was written to be the protagonist and main character, the premise of the show still extends to her. So, why is she hated for falling under that same flawed human being saving the world umbrella that the rest of the team is protected by?

Anyway, I’m sure there’s more I could say on the matter. But, honestly what this boils down to is that I understand the other characters deserved more storylines and air time, what they gave Gwen wasn’t used well because the writers didn’t treat her well either.

But the constant need to tear Gwen down in order to love the other characters is absolutely unnecessary.

[sunriseverse]

Tattoo artist!Newt AU ? Or an AU where Newmann meet at Torchwood? Up to ypu:)

why not both (under the cut because it’s uhh. not exactly short lol)

tattoo artist:

- newt still is like, a prodigy, or whatever, but he winds up getting pushed into professorship. the thing is, he’s not...a great teacher? like he doesn’t think he’s smarter than everyone around him he just. doesn’t like to slow down and he’s not very good at teaching people who don’t already know what he’s talking about

- anyway he’s not very happy and he winds up saying fuck it and telling MIT that he’s like. going to fuck off. bye bye lol. anyway he has a few months of just not having any purpose and then on a whim he applies for a tattoo artist apprentiship...and he’s actually pretty good at it? and likes it?

- eventually he gets his license and starts working at the shatterdome tattoo and piercing shop, run by co-owners herc and stacker. coworkers include mako, yancy, tendo, raleigh, and chuck

- hermann comes in to get his first tattoo and he’s kind of nervous and newt, who’s going to do the tattoo for him, is really patient and explains what’s going to happen and tells hermann to let him know if he needs a break because of the pain and basically just putting hermann at ease

- newt unsurprisingly talks basically the entire time but hermann...doesn’t actually mind it? and they get kind of friendly, and afterwards newt says goodbye and hope you come again (it’s always good to have repeat customers) etc and he doesn’t like. expect to see hermann again really because hermann doesn’t seem like the type of person to come in multiple times

- except newt does run into him again. it’s a party that newt was invited to by an old MIT colleague/friend and hermann is there and newt recognises him and hermann recognises newt and they wind up talking for the entire evening and run into each other a few more times and hermann winds up asking newt out and it’s ridiculously adorable

torchwood crossover:

- i’m 100% convinced that torchwood exists in the pacific rim universe. they’re just.........in the uk and the uk isn’t on the pacific and they’ve got their own aliens to deal with, you know, they never really get around to telling the PPDC, you know, uh, yeah, aliens are a thing we might have experience with

- this au ignores the deaths of the torchwood three crew. they’re not dead. my word is law. anyway. post pitfall newt and hermann decide they deserve a vacation and where better to take it than the uk. in the last week of the three week vacation, they go to wales

- and where’s their first stop? why none other than cardiff! they’re expecting nice lay in mornings in the hotel rooms and scenic walks and seeing nice things and—and on day two they’re out late at night on a date in a nice restaurant and then on the way home bam. wevils. and who should come to their rescue other than (bloody) torchwood?

- newt is absolutely delighted by owen. he keeps teasing hermann that owen could be his twin. hermann is unconvinced. owen gets a kick out of the fact that unlike hermann, he’s a real doctor, and also picks newt’s brain about xenobiology. jack flirts with both hermann and newt because he’s jack, i’m not sure it’s physically possible for him not to flirt with the people he runs into. hermann and ianto bond over well-brewed tea, organising things properly, and passive-aggressiveness and dry humour. tosh and hermann get into a conversation about coding and computers that has everyone's eyes glaze. gwen gets in later because she had something she had to deal with and she’s like guys?? you realise that’s doctors geiszler and gottlieb who saved the world right?? at which point everything descends into chaos

- eventually newt and hermann leave on the grounds that it’s late and they have an early-morning tour and they really ought to be going. after their vacation is over, they mutually agree to not visit cardiff again