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cardest · 4 years ago

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London playlist

London - since 43 AD it has to be one of the more fascinating cities on Earth. Such a rich history. From Shakespeare Theatre to the music from there today. I just had to put a London playlist together. From Soho to Brixton, from Highgate to Clapham what a collection of songs! It’s over 350 songs and it could easily expand to 400. **I have a separate England & Wales playlist coming, so, stay tuned for that**.

To play the songs, hit the link right here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1_ntP663JhZl-hvn9EwFp9L

ENGLAND & WALES playlist is coming soon! What songs have I left out? Let me know! Add your own songs! Cheers. Pip pip, tally ho!

LONDON 001 Generation X - Day By Day 002 The Clash - London Calling 003 Austin Powers - theme song (Soul Bossa? Nova ) 004 The Kinks - Dedicated Follower Of Fashion 005 Killing Joke - Empire Song 006 Black Sabbath - Wicked World 007 The Who - Welcome 008 The Damned - Neat, neat, neat 009 GIRLSCHOOL - LONDON 010 007 theme song 011 Motorhead - Motorhead 012 Wire - Ex Lion Tamer 013 David Bowie - Maid of Bond Street 014 The Misfits - London Dungeon 015 Rolling Stones - 016 The Adverts - Bored Teenagers 017 Siouxsie & The Banshees - Spellbound 018 Penny Dreadful - Soundtrack - Main Theme 019 Eurythmics - Love Is A Stranger 020 The Cure - Subway Song 021 Adam And The Ants - Puss 'n' Boots 022 Iron Maiden - 22 Acacia Avenue 023 COIL - Fire of the mind 024 Public Image Ltd - One Drop. 025 LUSH - Breeze 026 Bliss Signal - Surge 027 The Pogues - Misty Morning, Albert Bridge 028 PhD - Won't Let You Down 029 Birthday Party - Hats On Wrong 030 Eddy Grant - Electric Avenue 031 Help Yourself - Reaffirmation 032 Grave Miasma - Gnosis of the summon 033 Roy Ayers - We Live In London Baby 034 Led Zeppelin - The Rover 035 Gang of Four - What we all want 036 Pet Shop Boys - West End Girl 037 Sleaford Mods - 6 Horsemen (The Brixtons) 038 Paul Young - Love of the Common People 039 The Saint (original) - Theme 040 The Human League - Dont You Want Me 041 Sex Pistols - God Save The Queen 042 The Beatles - A Day In The Life 043 Def Leppard - Love bites 044 The Stranglers - Another Camden Afternoon 045 The Kinks - See My Friends 046 Elton John - Bennie and the Jets 047 Suede - Moving 048 Queen - Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy 049 Cliff Richard & the Shadows - She's Gone 050 The Rolling Stones - Start Me Up 051 Loop - Fade Out 052 Jah Wobble's Invaders Of The Heart - A13 053 The Magnetic Fields - All the Umbrellas in London 054 Wendy Carlos - Title Music From A Clockwork Orange (From Purcell's Music For The Funeral Of Queen Mary) 055 The Police - Every Little Thing she does it Magic 056 Cockney Rejects - The Greatest Cockney Rip Off 057 Spandau Ballet - Spandau Ballet Chant No.1 058 The Pretenders - Middle of the Road 059 The Who - Dogs 060 The Jam - London Girl 061 Cradle of Filth - Hurt and Virtue 062 Joy Division - Isolation 063 Nick Drake - At the Chime of a City Clock 064 Sham 69 - Cockney Kids Are Innocent 065 Deep Purple - Mandrake Root 066 Throbbing Gristle - Hit by a rock 067 David Bowie - Rubber Band 068 Roxy Music - Do The Strand 069 Slaves - Cheer Up London 070 T. Rex - London Boys 071 Kirsty MacColl - Autumngirlsoup 072 New Model Army - Archway Towers 073 Scorpions - Lovedrive 074 Isaac Hayes - Doesnt Rain In London 075 Peter Tosh - Buk-In-Hamm Palace 076 The Slits - Typical Girls 077 Pharaoh Sanders - Midnight In Berkeley Square (Instrumental) 078 Blue Cheer - Girl From London 079 Sex Pistols - Satellite 080 Judas Priest - (The Hellion ) Electric Eye 081 UFO - Lights Out 082 Joy Division - Digital 083 Muse - Uprising 084 George Harrison - All Things Must Pass 085 Robert Palmer - Addicted To Love 086 Fine Young Cannibals - Blue 087 New Order - Blue Monday 088 Würzel - Midnight In London 089 Rod Stewart - Gasoline Alley 090 The Wildhearts - Down On London 091 Supertramp - Nothing To Show 092 Motörhead - Metropolis 093 Current 93 - Lucifer Over London 094 The Pogues - Dark Streets of London 095 The Cult - All Souls Avenue 096 The Jam - In The City 097 The Undertones - Teenage Kicks 098 Iggy Pop - Play It Safe 099 Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Jack the Ripper 100 The Cure - Lets Go To Bed 101 Suede - Animal Nitrate 102 Wire - field day for the sundays 103 Black Books TV Show - Opening Theme 104 Paul McCartney & Wings - London Town 105 Madness - Primrose Hill 106 The Troggs - No. 10 Downing Street 107 Iron Maiden - Gangland 108 PJ Harvey - The Last Living Rose 109 The Rollers - Soho 110 Electric Wizard - Lucifer's Slaves 111 The Buzzcocks - Just Lust 112 Doctor Who Theme Tune 1980 113 Cathedral - Fountain Of Innocence 114 Pretenders - Swinging London 115 Hanoi Rocks - Tooting Bec Wreck 116 Es - 'Chemical 117 Bee Gees - Trafalgar 118 The Peddlers - Under London Lights 119 Cliff Richard - The Young Ones 120 Big Audio Dynamite - Sightsee M.C 121 ABC - Tower of London 122 Accept - London Leatherboys 123 Pitchshifter - Please Sir 124 Portishead - We Carry On 125 John Lennon - Whatever Gets You Thru The Night 126 The Lurkers - Ain't Got a Clue 127 Iron Maiden - Die with your boots on 128 Siouxsie and the Banshees - Kiss Them For Me 129 Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - From Her to Eternity 130 The Jam - London Traffic 131 The Cranberries - Waiting In Walthamstow 132 The Kinks - Victoria 133 Heads Hands & Feet - Pete Might Spook The Horses 134 Whitesnake - Long Way From Home 135 Queensryche - London 136 Concrete Blonde - Walking in London 137 Deep Purple - Fireball 138 The Ruts - dope for guns 139 Wham! - Bad Boys 140 Generation X - One Hundred Punks 141 Joe Jackson - Down To London 142 Anti-Nowhere League - Streets of London 143 The Wildhearts - Shandy Bang 144 David Bowie - The London Boys 145 The Human League - Human 146 Cockney Rejects - East end 147 Dire Straits - Eastbound Train 148 Ian Drury - Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick 149 Sepultura - Filthy rot 150 The Jam - Down In The Tube Station At Midnight 151 Fine Young Cannibals - She Drives Me Crazy 152 Purson - Electric Landlady 153 Black Sabbath - Tomorrow's Dream 154 The Clash - Guns of Brixton 155 Blood Ceremony - Lord Of Misrule 156 Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life - Penis Song 157 Gentlemans Pistols - Hustler's Row 158 Frankie Goes To Hollywood - Relax 159 Jethro Tull - Cross Eyed Mary 160 The Yobs - The Ballad of the Warrington 161 Cradle of Filth - Principle Of Evil Made Flesh 162 Bruce Hornsby - The Black Rats Of London 163 Inspiral Carpets - How It Should Be 164 The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Foxy Lady 165 PETULA CLARK - WINCHESTER CATHEDRAL 166 Lush - Olympia 167 Hunters & Collectors - Blind Eye 168 Thompson Twins - Hold Me Now 169 David Bowie - The Man Who Sold the World 170 UK Subs - C.I.D. 171 Queen - Dont Stop Me Now 172 Bruce Dickinson - Accident of Birth 173 the clash - capital radio one 174 UB40 - Here I Am (Come And Take Me) 175 The Meads Of Asphodel - Guts For Sale 176 Horrible Histories: Savage Songs - Boudicca 177 Swallow the Sun - Labyrinth Of London (Horror Pt. IV) 178 Mad Professor - Ben Gone Wrong 179 Howard Jones - Things Can Only Get Better 180 Genesis - The Battle Of Epping Forest 181 The Damned - problem child 182 Squeeze - Cool For Cats 183 Manfred Mann - Belgravia 184 The Bee Gees - Walking Back to Waterloo 185 Pink Floyd - Waiting For The Worms 186 Madness - Victoria Gardens 187 Paradise Lost - Soul Courageons 188 YES - Roundabout 189 PJ Harvey - This Is Love 190 The Horrors - Jack The Ripper 191 King Crimson - Red 192 The Smiths - How Soon Is Now 193 Level 42 - Heathrow 194 Intaferon - Get Out Of London 195 Burt Bacharach - Bond street 196 David Bowie - Ziggy Stardust 197 The Clash - Londons Burning 198 Killing Joke - Follow The Leaders 199 Saxon - The Court of the Crimson King 200 Buzzcocks - Harmony in My Head 201 Fairport Convention - Fiddlesticks (Peel Session) 202 Napalm Death - Errors In The Signals 203 Empire - Hot Seat 204 Anathema - Shroud of Frost 205 Pitchshifter - Condescension 206 The Beatles - Hey Jude 207 Affinity - Highgate 208 KLF - 3 A.M. Eternal (Pure Trance) 209 Warren Zevon - Werewolves of London 210 David Axelrod - London 211 The Wombles - Wellington Goes To Waterloo 212 EastEnders Theme 213 Cathedral - Hypnos 164 214 Tom Jones - It's Not Unusual 215 Alan Moore with Tim Perkins - The Highbury Working A Beat Seance 216 Transvision Vamp - Sex Kick 217 Elton John - Tell Me When The Whistle Blows 218 Firebird - Bow bells 219 The Jam - A' Bomb In Wardour Street 220 Caravan - Waterloo Lily 221 Lord Sutch & Heavy Friends - Flashing Lights 222 David Bowie - Oh! You Pretty Things 223 Hot Chocolate - West End of Park Lane 224 Thames television ident 1984 225 Newtown Neurotics - Living With Unemployment 226 Peter Murphy - Cuts You Up 227 Suede - Metal Mickey 228 Peter Gabriel - Sledgehammer 229 Killing Joke - The Gathering 230 Rolling Stones - You Can't Always Get What You Want 231 Kate Bush - Babooshka 232 Iron Maiden - The Prophecy 233 The Cure - Disintegration 234 The Damned - I Just Can't Be Happy Today 235 WIRE - Silk Skin Paws 236 Brian Eno - Here Come The Warm Jets 237 Souixee & the Banshees - Cascade 238 Jethro Tull - Jeffrey Goes to Leicester Square 239 AC/DC - Rising Power 240 Alternative TV - Life After Life 241 Napalm Death - Deceiver (Peel Sessions) 242 Electric Light Orchestra - Last Train To London 243 Bucks Fizz - London Town 244 The Sweet - Blockbuster! 245 999 - Bent Cross 246 The Groundhogs - Split, Pt. 1 247 Bow Wow Wow - Go Wild in the Country 248 Blood Ceremony - Half Moon Street 249 Ming Tea feat. Austin Powers - BBC One 250 Led Zeppelin - Immigrant Song 251 Big Audio Dynamite - EMC2 252 Crass - Banned from the Roxy 253 Sleaford Mods - Chaos Down In SoHo 254 Big Ben Chimes of Westminster, London 255 PJ Harvey - A Place Called Home 256 The Ruts - Staring at the rude boys 257 The Times - Whatever Happened To Thames Beat 258 Quincy Jones - London Derriere 259 Lush - Hypocrite 260 PIL - Reggie Song 261 The Style Council - You're The Best Thing 262 UK Subs - Dirty Girls 263 COIL - Slur 264 Frank Zappa - Dead girls of London 265 Iron Maiden - Prowler 266 The Slits - Difficult Fun 267 Killing Joke - Kings and Queens 268 Simple Minds - Chelsea Girl 269 Motorhead - Bomber 270 XTC - Towers Of London 271 Blitzkrieg - Hell to pay 272 Gryphon - Opening Move 273 The Challengers - The Streets of London 274 Peggy March - In Der Carnaby Street 275 The Damned - Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde 276 The Pogues - London You're a Lady 277 The Lords Of The New Church - Portobello 278 Rolling Stones - Hot Stuff 279 Joe Jackson - The Evil Eye 280 The Deviants - Garbage 281 Benny Hill Show - Wild Women 282 Suzi Quatro - Crash 283 Madness - day on the town 284 SHAKESPEAR'S SISTER - I Don't Care 285 Whitesnake - Wine Women An Song 286 Pink Floyd - Astronomy Domine 287 Rick Astley - Whenever You Need Somebody 288 Bauhaus - In the flat field 289 Dead Can Dance - In Power We Entrust The Love Advocated 290 Paul McCartney - Old Siam, Sir 291 Lush - De-Luxe 292 AC/DC - let's get it up 293 Sophia Loren & Peter Sellers - Bangers and mash 294 Black Sabbath - Childfren of the grave 295 Psychic TV - The orchids 296 Miracle - The Strife Of Love In A Dream 297 Carter USM - Lean On Me I Won't Fall Over 298 Screaming Lord Sutch - Jack the Ripper 299 WIRE - the 15th 300 Mott the Hoople - Honaloochie Boogie 301 Soft Machine - The Camden Tandem 302 Are You Being Served Theme 303 CATHEDRAL - Serpent Eve 304 Booker T. & The MG's - Carnaby Street 305 Culture Club - It's A Miracle 306 Motorhead - Nothing Up My Sleeve 307 Killing Joke - Money is not our God 308 Bronski Beat - Smalltown Boy 309 WIRE - Please take 310 Bananarama - Hey young London 311 The Jam - Carnaby Street 312 Catapilla - Charing Cross 313 The Shadows - Chelsea Boot 314 Ride - Chelsea Girl 315 The Damned - Grimly Fiendish 316 Marillion - Chelsea Monday 317 Slowdive - Celia's Dream 318 The Clash - Gates of the west 319 Thin Lizzy - Half Caste 320 David Bowie - I dig everything 321 VUUR - Days Go By - London 322 Elvis Costello - [I Don't Want To Go To] Chelsea 323 Uriah Heep - Walking in your shadow 324 Genesis - Invisible Touch 325 Amy Winehouse - Me & Mr Jones 326 Curve - Fait Accompli 327 Silverfish ‎- Crazy 328 Iron Maiden - Killers 329 Killing Joke - Ghost Of Ladbroke Grove 330 Sex Pistols - Anarchy In The UK 331 Paradise lost - remembrance 332 The Fall - Leave the Capitol 333 The Kinks - Waterloo Sunset 334 WIRE - Keep exhaling 335 The Peddlers - raining in London 336 Motorhead - damage case 337 10cc - Shock On The Tube (Don't Want Love) 338 Swervedriver - Rave Down 339 Spike Milligan - Tower Bridge 340 Phil Lynott - Solo In Soho 341 Adam and the Ants - Plastic Surgery 342 The Who - Pinball wizard 343 Pulp - Mile end 344 Generation X - Running with the Boss Sound 345 OMD - If You Leave 346 PiL - Public Image 347 Monty Python's Flying Circus TV show - theme song 348 Hall & Oates - London, Luck & Love 349 The Horrors - Three decades 350 Cathedral - Midnight Mountain 351 Killing Joke - glitch 352 Judas Priest - The Ripper 353 Air Raid Siren London Blitz 354 Dragonforce - Fury and the storm 355 Elastica - Connection 356 the Psychedelic Furs - Dumb waiters 357 Samantha Fox - Touch me 358 Wang Chung - Dance hall days 359 Kim Wilde - Water on glass 360 Siouxsie and the Banshees - Overground 361 Atomic Rooster - Tomorrow night 362 Fleetwood Mac - My Heart Beat Like a Hammer 363 Rainbow - Self Portrait 364 Billy Ocean - Love really hurts without you 365 Art of Noise - Beat box (division one) 366 Eurythmics - Never Gonna Cry Again 367 Samson - Grime Crime 368 Go West - we close our eyes 369 Ultravox - Saturday Night In The City Of The Dead 370 King Crimson - 21st Century Schizoid Man 371 Visage - Visage 372 Sandy Denny - Let's Jump The Broomstick 373 Brian Eno - Burning Airlines Give You So Much More 374 Fields Of The Nephilim - Blue water 375 Leftfield - Open Up 376 Blancmange - I've Seen The Word 377 Thomas Dolby - Flying north 378 Sisters of Mercy - Temple of love 379 Royal Orchestra - Royal Entrance Queen Elizabeth II 380 Pink Floyd - Goodbye blue sky 666 David Bowie - London Bye Ta - Ta

Play the songs here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1_ntP663JhZl-hvn9EwFp9L

#London playlist #london music #London #highhgate #david bowie #Judas Priest #lee dorrian #PIL #wire #killing joke #Throbbing Gristle #current 93 #music from london #black books #the horrors #pj harvey #motorhead #lush

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exosmutfactory · 4 years ago

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Six Phases 005 Pt 1

Who knew it nearly took 6 months to win your heart, and 6 phases for Baekhyun to lose his mind.

A/N: Hi, welcome to a 22.6K MONSTER of a chapter. Thank you.

[ contains: romance, fluff, angst, & smut ]

•⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •

The club is more alive than ever tonight. Almost everyone has taken to the dance floor and the place is packed everywhere with grinding bodies. It's not hard getting lost in the crowd.

I can barely see over the majority of the crowd in my stilettos. You'd think my current 5'10 height would make it easier to spot Baekhyun in the room, but nope, the flashing of lights and mass of bodies could conceal a damn pink polka dotted elephant from your eyes.

After spinning around to avoid the elbow of a particularly non-coordinated individual, I nearly crashed into the person behind me. "Excuse m-" My eyes widen at the familiar head of silver hair before I smile, "Hey."

Baekhyun chuckles, settling his hands on my hips; a brow raised in amusement, "Hello." He huskily replies; locks of hair attractively dangling in his eyes. He's adoring a red shirt with white scripted words all over it, black leather pants that make his thighs look scrumptious, and black heeled boots to match. Looking like a full course meal as always—and even more so than usual with that alluring look in his kohl outlined eyes.

Quickly reeling in my steadily-rising urges, I keep moving to the tempo of the moderate-paced music; loosely wrapping my arms around his neck, "What took so long? I thought I lost you for a second."

"Minseok hyung went on a tangent over how much business has been booming since he incorporated cheerwine-vodka drinks to the bar." He chuckles again, twirling me around with an adorable smile. "Your southern delicacy is really popular around here."

I grin, "It's the best of the best."

Baekhyun hums, pulling me closer and tilting his head to plant a kiss on my cherry red lips; causing me to giggle. "What?" He looks at me, smiling adorably.

"Nothing." I smile bashfully; cheeks warmed from the gesture.

"Come on," Spinning me around again, he suddenly dips my body; making me gasp as his hand rests securely on my back and lips brush against mine. Warm minty breath caressing my cheek, "Tell me."

"I-I just..." Locking eyes as he pulls me back up, I can't help but flush at his adoring stare. "Being with you, like this." I gesture to the dancefloor; blissfully unbothered by the pleasantly chaotic environment, and the thundering pound of music with him—and his firm body—so close and so warm. His comforting presence brings a smile to my lips, "It's nice."

His smile widens, a look of understanding flashing in his brown eyes. "I knew you had a kink for dancing with me."

Choking on a laugh, I smack his bicep; leaning on him for support as his contagious amusement rings in my ears. Would it be too mushy of me to say how utterly adorable Baekhyun is when he smiles like this? All bright crescent moon eyes, glowy cheeks and a boxy grin that I just want to kiss right off his pouty lips. His smile could light up the whole galaxy, not even the sun can deny that.

"And what if I do?" I murmur lowly, sliding my hand up his arm and down his chest; feeling the lean muscle underneath. "You got quiet," I muse, flickering my eyes up to his; quickly gulping at the pure lust swirling in his brown orbs.

Baekhyun grabs my wrist and slides my hand back up his chest, holding eye contact as he sucks my finger between his lips. The piercing gaze in his dark orbs making me sway out of rhythm—something he catches with a winning smirk. He tightens his grip on my hip, leaning to whisper into my ear, "Then I'm willing to fulfill your needs, baby."

Gulping at his deliberate lick of lips, a new song breaks me out of our little bubble. The familiar 8-count instrumental seems to trigger Baekhyun's memory as well; his hand releasing mine as I kick off my heels before his stable singing voice reaches my surprised ears.

"She got the mmm, brown eyes, caramel thighs. Long hair, no wedding ring," He gives a cute little nod, raising his brow attractively, "hey." He walks closer, causing me to step back to fully admire his confident aura. "I saw you lookin' from across the way. And now I really wanna know your name..."

He continues in that hypnotizing way of his—little sinful body rolls and confident crotch grabs—holding eye contact as if the words are meant for me; mouthing along with a satisfied smirk on his inviting lips.

"I love her hips, curves, lips say the words." He lightly brushes his hands over my thighs and up my waist, walking around to whisper into my individual ears along with the beat. "Te amo, mami, ah, te amo, mami."

"I kiss her, this love is like a dream..."

He brings my hand to his shoulder while grasping my other one, stepping forward as I step back in synchronization; meeting him toe to toe.

"So join me in this bed that I’m in

Push up on me and sweat, darling

So I'm gonna put my time in

And won’t stop until the angels sing-"

He spins me around and brings me back into his arms, swaying to the beat with my back to his chest and our joined hands resting on my hip. Matching smiles on our lips.

"Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me

Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me"

Spinning away, I turn to face Baekhyun, throwing his moves right back at him with a wink, "He got that mmm, green eyes, givin' me signs. That he really wants to know my name—hey. I saw you lookin' from across the way. And suddenly, I'm glad I came, ay-"

Gathering the skirt of my white dress, I dance light on my feet around him as the speakers burst out Spanish lyrics; smiling playfully at the captivated look in his eyes. "Mmm, green eyes, takin' your time. Now we know we'll never be the same."

"I love his lips 'cause he says the words," Putting my back to him, I arch my back, coyly peeking over each shoulder at him and slightly rolling my body against his to the beat, "Te amo, mami, ah, te amo, mami."

"Don’t wake up, this love is like a dream... So join me in this bed-"

Pressing my back to him again, we move in sync; heated skin to skin with only our thin clothes between. Barriers that don't even matter with my hand in his hair and his tight grip on my hips.

"-that I’m in

Push up on me and sweat, darling

So I'm gonna put my time in (Time in)

And won’t stop until the angels sing-"

Being cheeky, I slide my hands up my body while we sway side to side; resting my hand on the back of his neck.

"Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me

Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me."

He spins me around to him once again. Our eyes locked as we let ourselves get lost in the rest of the song.

"Flawless diamonds

In a green field near Buenos Aires

Until the sun's rising

We won't stop until the angels sing..."

The piercing gaze in his dark eyes is almost too much for me to bear; warm, slender fingers digging further into the soft swell of my hips with every twist of my waist.

"Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me

Jump in that water, be free

Come south of the border with me"

The song quickly fades into another, but Baekhyun and I don’t move. Chests pressed together and shared heavy breaths. His freshly dyed grey hair leaving streaks of silver sliding down his cheeks. Long strands of hair messily clinging to his forehead, sweat shining on his prominent collarbones and peek of a firm chest. His lick of lips as he takes the chance to check me out as well pushing me to my limit.

"Take me home." I breathe, pressing my lips to his.

"Shit." Baekhyun hisses, pausing to brush his hair back.

I can't help but chuckle, kicking off my heels and bending over to pick up the fallen table, "Told you keeping the lights off was a bad-" I jolt forward with a gasp, bracing myself against the wall with red cheeks. The accusatory look I shoot over my shoulder does nothing to change the hungry expression on his face, "The fuck did you just do, Byun?"

He tilts his head at me, hand resting comfortably on the curve of my ass, "You liked it." He observes, rubbing my throbbing cheek; lifting the corner of his lips, "Didn't you?"

I scoff in opposition to the redness of my cheeks, "That's not-" A moan escapes before I can clasp my hands over my mouth, staring at him with wide eyes.

Baekhyun merely raises a brow as his hand slips from my heated skin and down between my legs, full-on smirking at what he discovers there. He leans close, pressing his chest to my sensitive back. "You're soaked," He murmurs into my ear; gripping my hip when my legs shake at his light exploration.

I part my lips only to whimper at the smack he lands on my left cheek, quickly becoming breathless at his light taps on my clothed clit. "F-Fuck-" My back arches when he suddenly pulls away, flipping the skirt of my dress over my back and yanking my panties down in one go, "Baekhyun-" I nearly yell, knees buckling at the rough intrusion of two fingers into my wet core.

"Shh," He leans forward again, smacking my ass as his fingers pound into me, "Be a good girl for me."

I choke and scramble to find something to hold on to when he twists his wrist, curling his fingers right into my sweet spot. Neat, blunt nails lightly scratching against my clenching walls as my hands slip helplessly on the wall, "B-Baekhyun." I whimper, squeezing my eyes shut. Just when I'm at the edge and slowly lowering to the ground with shaky knees, he fucking pulls his fingers out.

At this point, the only thing keeping me on my feet is the acute annoyance I feel towards him right now.

"Bedroom." He states, slipping wet fingers past his kiss-swollen lips after I stand up and turn around to glare at him. He merely lifts a brow, hand still on my hip as he sucks obscenely loud on the slick digits; wicked tongue peeking out from his smirking lips.

Inwardly cursing him and myself, I walk further into the spacious apartment on wobbly legs. Crossing my arms once I enter the black, white and grey with a dash of red—thanks to me—styled room.

Baekhyun takes his sweet old time joining me. Slipping out of his shoes and socks before pressing me against the wall. Chest pressed to mine as he reconnects our lips, reaching down to pull my leg around his waist.

My nails dig mercilessly into his shoulders when he slides his fingers back inside me; arching my back at the addition of his thumb tapping my poor clit. One well-aimed thrust to my spot makes my knee buckle, gasping for breath and tensing up in preparation only for him to pull his fingers out again.

Baekhyun looks down at me with the darkest eyes; pupils blown wide as his hand rubs over my lower back and down to cup my ass. "You're shaking," He whispers, tightening his grip and hoisting me up into his arms before walking over to the bed. Setting me down gently with a soft kiss pressed to my lips.

I sit up to pull off my dress, "Don't you fucking dare." I hiss at his fingers walking up my thigh, crossing my quivering legs.

Baekhyun chuckles, pulling his shirt over his head, "Don't you want me to make you feel good, baby?"

"I... Yes..." Distracted by his glistening chest, I twitch at the feeling of his sneaky hand slipping between my thighs, fixing him with a glare. "Not stopping when I'm right there." I grumbled, jaw clenching at the persistent ache in my core.

"Does my baby want to come?" He coos, sliding off his leather pants before climbing onto the bed. Gaze locked on mine as he pulls my underwear off my legs.

Gulping at his predator stance, I sit like a deer caught in headlights, panting when his hands softly spread my heated thighs. His lips brushing over my inner thigh makes my back arch. "I'll literally flip if you stop again."

He hums noncommittally, leisurely leaving a trail of wet kisses up to where I need him the most. I close my eyes, trembling a little when his lip brushes over my folds.

Baekhyun hovers, and I can feel his eyes on me.

I know exactly what he wants.

Gulping again I nervously lick my lips, slowly peeling my eyes open to look back at him.

He releases his bottom lip from between his teeth, wordlessly holding up his palm in my direction with twinkling orbs.

The hot blush forming on my cheeks and small trembles in my body do nothing to ease my giddy heart as I gingerly place my shaky hand in his. Baekhyun's soft squeeze and sweet smile melts me further until he's flicking his tongue against my heated core. My grip tightens with every whimper and gasp he pulls from my lips. Barely a few minutes have gone by when my thighs start shaking again.

"Always so sweet for me," He murmurs, pulling away as I catch my breath. His warm skin brushes against my own as he leaves a trail of kisses back up to my lips, "Babe?"

Humming I blink the post-orgasm daze from my eyes, meeting his questioning orbs. Breath hitching at the feel of his cock rubbing along my thigh. "Yes," I breathe, biting my lip at his promising smile.

Baekhyun reaches over to the nightstand drawer, pulling out a condom as my cheeks flush. The way he rips the packet open from between his teeth stirs the fire growing in the pit of my stomach; an unintentional tease to upcoming events—or intentional based off the knowing smirk on his equally flushed face.

I can't help but scoff at his antics, trying my best not to squirm when his cock brushes over my sensitive pussy; growing impossibly redder and wetter at the thought of the word as he insists to tease over my wet folds. I never imagined myself referring to it in that way, let alone while my boyfriend is looking down at me like I'm his last meal.

Seriously, I swear the twinkle in his eye rivals the one he reserves for hawaiian pizza right now. And the groan that escapes his lips while finally sliding his cock into my waiting core making my breath hitch… Fuck me.

I never really saw myself actually enjoying the act of sex or fucking or whatever. Yes—I will admit—I probably think about sex more times than anyone should in a day, but to actually do it? To give someone one of the most precious things to me and enjoy it on the first night? Yeah, not how I saw myself evolving. Then again, who can ever predict how their first time will go? Who can predict a Baekhyun walking into their life? Surely not I, nor how much I appreciate the slight stretch of accommodating his impressive length.

—Okay, maybe I enjoy sex with Baekhyun more than the thought of sex itself—

A noise I never thought I could make escapes my lips when he gathers my body closer to his; hips grinding at a new angle into my core with dark brown eyes watching my every move and swallowing me whole. Fuck it—yes, I definitely enjoy it with him more.

"Are you close?" He murmurs, kissing behind my ear in a way that makes me squeak.

"Y-Yes." I sigh, clutching onto his shoulders and gasping when he increases the tempo, "Fuck."

Baekhyun chuckles huskily into my ear, his breath causing goosebumps to cover my heated skin. I don't even try to stifle my moan when his cock hits my sweet spot just right. A beautiful noise of his own leaving his lips as my walls clench around him. I'm still so sensitive from earlier there is no coaxing needed to make me cum on his cock.

Baekhyun's gasp fans over the sensitive skin of my neck; a sneaky hand slipping between my legs while I'm trying to catch my own breath. My thighs tighten around his waist and hips buck from the prolonged sensations. Somehow he manages to pull one last orgasm from me as he's reaching his own; kiss swollen lips beautifully parted and head thrown back while filling the condom. There's no relaxing myself with the way he stays buried deep inside my clenching walls. If that condom wasn’t on… I quickly shake off that dangerous thought.

The feeling of Baekhyun's chest pressed to mine with our frantic heartbeats and shared breaths combined with his breathless kiss to my lips has a whole new wave of emotion bursting through my being. I love him so much it kinda hurts.

"Happy?" He muses, leaning up to run a hand through his messy hair, looking me over with those mesmerizing brown eyes of his. A soft smile playing at his lips. I don't reply, too busy trying to regulate my breathing while lying completely lax against the sheets. Not at all ashamed to take in the glorious sight of his flushed cheeks and glistening chest amidst the afterglow, and leaning up to press another kiss to his sweet mouth. “Very.” I murmur, lips curling up into a smile that matches his own.

////

There's nothing like waking up to a blarming alarm at 7:30 in the morning after a particularly long night that states “MEETING WITH THE BROS/HOES” in all caps. Especially after partying—and partaking in the “after party”—the previous night. Why did I agree to meet at the coffee shop on a Sunday morning? Oh, right.. Baekhyun was supposed to drive me back to the dorm last night…

:) Well then.

I mean, it wouldn't have been so bad if I had actually managed to get out of bed when my alarm went off this morning.

Now here I stand, hastily fixing my appearance in the reflection of the cafe window. Making sure the collar of my backless crop-top is up and freshly made curls are covering stray blemishes on my skin.

The events of last night fill my mind before I promptly shake my head, clearing my throat as I step through the door.

"Well look who it is!" A warm voice chimes. I look up from checking my outfit again to an amused Jongin, watchful Jenny, and Sehun waving like a madman from our booth. Quickly making my way across the room with red cheeks while avoiding the annoyed looks of onlookers seated around.

"Nice of you to finally join us," Jenny muses, knowing blue eyes following me as I plop down into the remaining seat next to her. "If you didn't call the other night I'd swear Baek put you in a sex-induced coma."

Snorting, I quietly take a sip from the steaming mug seated in front of me; savoring the taste of lemon ginger tea and setting it carefully back on the table. "Nothing of the sort happened."

"Really?" She squints a little, Sehun and Jongin watching on in amusement, "You got that glow about you right now."

Instinctively looking off to the left, my cheeks grow warmer at Jongin's chuckle. I can't even throw Baekhyun under the bus for how he held me up last night, or this morning; trying my best not to bite my lip. Another type of sex added to the favorites list. "I just slept really well."

"Uh, huh," Jenny nods, taking a sip of her own cup with a knowing smile on her face. "I bet you did."

"Anyway," I deflect, looking between the trio. "How are you guys? It’s been awhile."

"I'm convinced that my intern is a complete dumbass," Sehun grumbles, finishing his coffee and sitting back with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Uh, oh," I utter, trying not to smile at the petulant expression on his normally blank features, "What he do this time?"

"I caught him trying to spot check a guy doing 50 reps of bench press with 200 pounds." He tries to explain as a waitress brings over plates full of muffins fresh out the oven. Recalling a brief conversation of this particularly risk-taking kid, I can't help smiling while digging into my strawberry one. "Maybe he's good at it."

He sighs, running a hand through his hair. "Riley, this kid looks like a twig would be too much for him-"

"Now that's a lie," I immediately interject, pointing my fork at him. "If that was the case you would have turned him away on the spot. Did you ask him how much he lifts?" Sehun begrudgingly nods, lips still childishly pursed. "Good, now give the poor kid more credit. He's probably stronger than you think."

"But-"

"Have a little faith in him," I soothe. "If you're really worried then make sure you are there next time to observe and intervene if needed, but you have to let him do something." I emphasize, "So he can improve."

Sehun sits quietly for a few minutes, thinking it over as the rest of us fuss over the arrangement of identical glasses and sneaky hands (Jongin) stealing food from others' plates. "Damn it, why do you have to be right."

"Comes with the territory." I grin, referring to our matching stickers childishly stuck to the back of our phone cases. It happened during a recent drunken night at the newest bar in town. Donkey and Shrek; some days I'm one of them and oftentimes he's the other.

"Just my luck to befriend an intellectually logical yet empathic person," He mumbles, sipping his coffee with a small smile quirking at his lips.

"That's best friend to you!" I retort, glaring at his mischievous smirk before turning to Jongin. "How bout you man? What's cooking?"

His brow raises, amusement shining in his eyes at my poor attempt to not laugh at my own joke. "The kids got a residual coming up," He utters, thoughtfully chewing on a piece of strawberry muffin I swear he took from the top of mine.

"Oh?" I hum, taking the extra muffin Sehun offers me before blinking in realization. "Oh! Really? When is it?"

"This Saturday," A certain kind of sparkle is in his normally brooding eyes, small smile on display. "It's the last one before school starts."

"Yeah," I wince, staring down into my swirling mug with a frown, "Don't remind me. I still got books to get."

"What year will you be in this year?" Jongin inquires, brow raised when I only give him a deadpan look. "What?"

"Really?"

He shrugs, "How am I supposed to know what year you’re in?"

"Anyway!" Jenny chirps while I take another sip of my drink, judging him over the rim of my mug. "There's a party going on at Jongdae's this Friday." Her eyes are already lighting up at the thought of what she's planning to wear—or at the prospect of having an excuse to be with a certain brunet for the entire evening. "Are you going?"

Humming a bit in thought, I lightly shake my head, setting my drink down. "I think I'll pass."

"But why?" She protests, puppy eyes in full effect while I quickly avert my eyes. I'm not about to fall for that trick again. "...It isn't because of Baekhyun, is it?"

My neck cracks a little as I whip around to face her; temples pulsing with a painful whiplash, "And why would Baekhyun have anything to do with it?"

"Bro, you are like attached at the hip," Jongin states with a raised brow, idly twirling a spoon around his fingertips.

"Has he been to a party since he moved?" Sehun lifts his head from the phone in his hands, slipping it into his back pocket when I give him the side-eye.

"Well-" I pause, thinking back over the past two months. They are kind of right in a way. I spend more time having lunch dates in Baekhyun's office than sleeping in on Saturday mornings. There's more of my clothes neatly stacked on the left side of his closet than my own back at the dorms. And I swear I didn't purposely stash his favorite black hoodie in my backpack...

(I did. I totally did and I don't know when I'll give it back).

"…No," I conclude, stirring my drink.

Sehun makes a ‘mmhm’ noise, leaning back in his seat while Jongin snorts, shooting me a knowing look. "The wild princess changing playboy Baekhyun's ways."

I scowl as Jenny nods, throwing an arm over my shoulders with the cheekiest smile, "Who would have thought, right?"

"You all suck." I groan, hiding within my folded arms on the table. "...I'm going."

"Yes!" Jenny squeals, clapping her hands in glee and outstretching one out to the shell-shocked man across from her, "Pay up, Jongin."

"Riley, I was rooting for you." He protests, handing a 20 over with a disappointed frown.

I merely look over at Sehun, raising a brow when he's quick to hold up his hands. "I wouldn't. You're very 50/50 lately."

"Oh that's very reassuring," I grumble, sipping my warm drink; not fighting the smile curling at the corners of my lips. "Good thing I bought that new dress."

"What!?" Jenny gasps, lightly shoving my shoulder when my smile just widens. "I swear you never wear the same dress."

"Perks of having a CEO boyfriend," Jongin muses, washing down a muffin with some coffee.

"Nah," I set the empty mug back on the table, shaking my head. "I saved up a lot from my part-time job."

"Part-time job?" Jenny inquires, lowering her phone down to her lap while looking at me. "When did you get one of those?"

"She had one before school," Sehun explains, continuing after my agreeing hum; giving him a thumbs up with a mouthful of muffin. "A well-off flower shop, I believe."

"Wow." Jenny blinks, narrowing her eyes at me. "You're just full of surprises."

"It was nice," I mumble, dabbling my lips with a napkin, "Besides the fact I have mild pollen allergy."

Jongin snorts and I grin, enduring Sehun's amusement and Jenny's continuous scoldings as the morning sun rises higher in the sky.

I checked my makeup in the mirror one last time: a fierce copper glitter, smokey eye look to match my sexy black lace sleeveless dress with see-through sides. The form-fitting material complementing my every curve. Even lingerie is out of the question with this daring dress, but I have no fear. Stretch marks can't be easily seen in the dim lighting of a drunken party, and my lips are coated in a glossy pink shade to not kill too many men in the crowd tonight.

Leaning away from the mirror while recapping my gloss, I set it down next to my phone that lights up with a notification.

I miss you （>﹏<）♡o(╥﹏╥)o ♥♡

8:28pm

Giggling with an adoring smile, I maneuver around my baby pink manicured nails to type a response.

I miss you too, baby. Take care at the office, okay?

The day is almost over! 4 more hours to go. You can do it :***

8:30pm

A few heart emojis shared later and a knock sounds at the door. I grab my phone, sparkly golden clutch and walk over with even strides; the clinks of my nude high heels against the floor blooming more confidence in my chest. The sight of a familiar head of blue hair greets me on the other side of the doorway.

"Hey," Jenny perks up, spinning around, "You ready?" One look at my outfit and she smirks, raising an eyebrow knowingly as I take in her matching cocktail dress. "Oh honey, we are going to be sharks tonight."

Giggling I loop my arm around hers, our respective heels clicking down the residential apartment complex halls.

"So," She adjusts her hair in the reflection of the elevator, carefully pulling curls from inside of her dangling turquoise earrings. "What are your plans for tonight?"

"Plans?" I raise a brow, briefly meeting her gaze while meticulously evening out my gloss in my handheld mirror.

"Dancing, drinking, going home early," She lists off her turquoise manicured nails with a nod, nonchalantly leaning against the railing on the far wall. "Did you even tell Baekhyun you were going out tonight?"

A chill goes down my spine as I put my things away, and I don't know why. "Tell him?" I chuckle, rubbing my goosebump covered arms.

Jenny continues to nod, long nails tapping rapidly across her phone. "Mhm." She hums, voice filled with a level of concern that has my head tilting in confusion. "He's a worrier, you know?"

My brows furrow at that. "...It'll be fine," I mumble after a minute, trying to convince myself. Based on the look she shoots my way it didn't reassure her either. "Besides, he's working late tonight," My heart sinks a little at the reminder; I shrug it off. "I won't see him til the morning anyway."

She meets my eye over the illuminated screen of her phone; perfectly shaped brow raised. "If you're sure."

"Yes, Jen." I stress in exaggeration, placing my cold hands on my hips. "What's the worst that can happen?"

She says nothing as the double doors open, quietly putting away her phone as we exit side by side. A gust of wind meets us the instant we step outside.

"Maybe he's over it..." I hear her mutter under her breath.

The screeching of tires startles us before I can say anything. A familiar shiny black Mercedes pulls up to the curb; bass booming from the cranked up stereo speakers.

"Ready ladies?" Jongin's smirking face appears through the rolled down window; his arm resting comfortably on the window seal, free hand gesturing to his vehicle. "Your chariot awaits."

Jenny scoffs as I muffle a giggle. Before we can take a step forward, another voice rings out over the music.

"Get in already! You're letting out all the cold air." Sehun complains.

A scoff leaves me at that. "You're not the one navigating stilettos, Oh!" I yell right back, climbing into the backseat as Jenny takes the passenger side; her laughter filling up the spacious car.

Jongdae's party wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be. The usual partygoers were there except for talented bartender Minseok, brooding Kyungsoo, enthusiastic Chanyeol, and of course Baekhyun. Such a little difference left a major impact in the handling of drinks, (I had to run down to the convenience store with Sehun to get him to buy us dr pepper and a bottle of cheap vodka to share. Perks of being 21). The selection of music—I honestly never knew that techno dubstep could leave my head pounding harder than any hard liquor. And the state of the dance floor… Between the crushed solo cups and unidentifiable fluids littering the wooden floors, it's a far cry from any event Baekhyun has had.

"Shit." I hiss, clutching my throbbing knee. Struggling to insert the key into the apartment door while balancing on one unsteady foot. The door is yanked open before I can make a third attempt. I blink, slowly lifting my eyes up to a disheveled Baekhyun; his silver hair in a disarray and white dress shirt partially unbuttoned. My heart skips at the sight; a smile soon forming on my lips, "Baekhyunee-"

He steps out the reach of my open arms, swiftly turning to head back inside, leaving the door open.

I hover in the doorway for a moment with a frown, feeling a bit apprehensive while stepping over the threshold. Maybe it was a bad day at the office? His subordinates have been giving him a hard time lately, making decisions without his approval only to leave him to fix their mess in the end. Plus the rumors of a mole trying to catch a peek at his upcoming fashion line designs isn’t ideal. With great power comes great responsibility... I don't know how Baekhyun does it.

I peek inside to find him pacing the wooden floor with heavy footsteps. His neighbors surely won't like that.

"Where were you?" He stops in the middle of the living room, watching me with keen eyes. There's nothing exciting about the darkness I find there.

"Where was I?" I mumble quietly, gently pulling the door closed behind me. Hesitating to even lock it.

"Where were you?" He steps closer and it takes everything in me not to recoil under his predatory stance. Frustration clear in his voice with a sense of poorly concealed panic in his eyes.

What's wrong? I want to ask; worriedly glancing over the obvious exhaustion written all over his face.

"Why haven't you been returning my calls?" His wild gestures towards his device innocently sitting on the arm of the couch remind me of my own tucked away in my clutch; still on airplane mode. His black blazer is even left in a heap on the floor. "How are you going to ask to spend the night yet when I come back you're-"

"I went out," I simply shrug with a twitch of my lips; guilt and slight annoyance bubbling in my chest at the doubtful expression forming on his tired face. "It's a Friday night, Baekhyun."

"Without telling me?" He points to himself. "No call, text or anything?" His eyes trail over my person, hovering over my new dress; brown eyes indifferent instead of the awe I wanted to find there. He scoffs after a moment, shaking his head. "Very responsible of you."

"I'm sorry?" I laugh a little in disbelief fighting the urge to hide away from his scrutinizing gaze. "What are you, my father?"

"Sometimes it feels like it." He grits out, lips curling up into a mocking smile.

My hands drop down to my sides at that. "If you were so worried," I continue despite the bad taste in my mouth; crossing my arms and staring him down, "You could have contacted Jenny."

"How do I know you were with her?" He chuckles bitterly, roughly running a hand through his ruffled hair. A disgusted look crossing his face as he spits out, "How do I know you weren't out fucking Jong-"

"Excuse me?" I breathe, placing a hand to my chest with wide eyes; my heart somewhere between being shattered at my feet and beneath the lump forming in my throat.

He pauses, suddenly at a loss for words before spinning on his heel.

"Oh no." I chuckle at his audacity. "Finish that sentence, Baek. Go ahead." My voice is sugar sweet while following him to the hallway; steadily deepening with my building rage. "Go a fucking head."

He stops, deciding to get in my face then. Looking me over in disdain and hissing venomously. "You were out fucking Jongin."

"Do you have a height complex or something...?" I chuckle in disbelief, hand on my hip while pushing him back with the other. "Don't come accusing me of anything just because of your insecurities." Lifting my chin, I murmur. "You either talk to me like a fucking adult or I let you talk to the wall because I am sick of your shit."

"I'm sick of you too," He shoots back, hurt clear in his glistening brown eyes, swiftly turning to storm off down the end of the hallway.

A tired sigh leaves my lips while shaking my pounding head; feeling a headache coming on. "You promised not to go to bed angry!" I yell after him, leaning against the wall to tug off my annoying heels.

"I'm not angry." He growls, slamming the door to the guest bedroom shut.

I jolt at the startling noise, rubbing the back of my neck; muttering sourly under my breath. "Not angry my ass..."

We barely speak a word to each other for the rest of the weekend. He either leaves a room every time I enter it or downright acts like I'm not even there. Patience wearing thin, I repack my overnight bag shoved deep under the bottom of his bed from months of being unused and start sleeping back at the dorms. Although it is rightfully my room too, I still feel like I'm guiltily crashing there with how much I've been gone lately. Jenny doesn't mind though.

"I've missed the company." She reassures, helping me apply a face mask.

"...Do you think I was being unreasonable?" I mumble, looking down at the container in my hands.

Her sigh is a long one. "Well." She nods, smoothing the cream out on my skin, "The height comment was below the belt. And you could have shot him a text."

"I had my phone on silent..." I mumble in remorse, glancing over the 30 worry-filled messages and 5 calls he sent to me the other night. Not a peep has been heard out of him since, not even when I reminded him where the cute teapot set is for his adorable tuesday tea time…

"You were a bit harsh. But." She continues, raising her clean hand when I begin to object, "He had no right accusing you of cheating." The disgusted look on her face matches the tone in her voice. "Like what the fuck? Who cheats on the best dick in town-"

"Jenny!"

"Kidding!" She laughs, dodging my hand, sporting a serious expression again. "In all seriousness. Baekhyun has trust issues…" She trails off, blinking before I can identify the odd look in her eyes. "And sadly, I'm not surprised."

"Really?" I keep still as she nods, applying more cream across my forehead. "...Do you know what happened?"

She winces, gently taking the container from my hands. "I think it is something you should ask him about yourself." She mumbles, avoiding my gaze.

Sighing, I nod, leaning forward to apply some cream across her nose. The information—or lack thereof—is stuck in my head for days afterwards.

Yeah, nearly a whole damn week goes by before I hear from Baekhyun's stubborn ass again… And I end up being the one to make the first move.

It took ten agonizing minutes of debating with myself before daring to press the first number on my speed dial. Desperate times calls for desperate measures… And I'm this close to losing it.

"Hello?"

I release a shaky breath, heart pounding in my ears. Just that word alone eases a bit of the tight feeling in my chest. I have never, ever been more grateful to hear his voice as I pace the luxurious lobby; anxiously glancing up at the intimidating label of Park's Publishing on the far wall. Trying my hardest not to bite on my freshly white-tipped nails.

"Riley?" He speaks up, bringing me out of my unrelenting thoughts, "...Baby?"

"B-Baekhyun." I whimper, fist clenched by my side; fighting the urge to wrinkle my perfectly ironed pencil skirt, or worse, bolt.

A distant voice says something unidentifiable and a door closes before he speaks again; honey voice closer than before, "What is it? What's wrong?"

A tiny noise barely escapes my shaking lips; I plop myself down on a leather chair. "I don't think I can do this." I gasp out, tears stinging behind my eyes.

"Do what?" He continues a bit frantic, rustling papers sounding over the line, “Tell me what's going on, baby. Where are you?"

My voice barely reaches a whisper. "I-Interview."

The rustling stops and he releases a deep sigh; going quiet. It snaps me out of my panicked daze and riles me up in a fit all over again.

"I-I'm sorry," I blabber, rapidly blinking back tears, "You must be busy and I shouldn't-"

"Baby," He soothes and I pause, listening to his voice. "Listen to me."

I nod wordlessly, taking in his every word.

"You are going to do amazing." He begins. "You're going to go in there, answer their questions and blow them away with your input." He insists, that CEO persona in his voice. "They are going to love you and you are going to get that position. Do you hear me?"

"Y-Yes," I whisper, clutching onto the phone.

"Good. You got this," He softens, smile being heard through his voice, "I believe in you, okay?"

"Okay," I hush, bashfully fiddling with the bottom of my skirt; peeking over at the waving secretary trying to get my attentionand straightening up, "I-I got to go. It's time…"

"They are gonna love you baby," He shushes. "But not more than I do."

A smile makes its way to my lips; my heart racing for a different reason entirely. Even when in the middle of a cold war, he still manages to make my heart flutter. "Thank you, Baekhyun." His reassuring hum resonates in my being; warming me up from my sore feet to my cold fingertips.

With quick partings, I hang up the phone and make my way over to the secretary standing by a door. Taking a deep breath before entering the spacious room. Let the games begin.

Three days later, I get an email in the middle of lunch; damn near sending Sehun's poor ham sandwich flying across the room.

"Sehun!!" I squeal, jumping out my seat; phone in hand.

"Wha—What?!!" He exclaims, trying to stop me from excitedly slapping his arms.

"Sehun!!!! I-" He finally catches my hand making me pause, taking a look around the silent cafe. Onlookers watching us with their brows raised. "Just a job interview. Carry on." Turning back to him with red cheeks, I quietly shout, "I got the job!"

His eyes widen before I'm pulled into a bear hug, my laughter muffled in the soft fabric of his black t-shirt.

Everyone is elated at the news, congratulating me at our next meet up in Minseok's new bar. The atmosphere is homey despite all the new faces.

"Congrats man," Chanyeol claps a hand on my shoulder in passing, smiling over the glass of bourbon in his hand while taking the seat next to Sehun. My best friend fist bumps me from the left side of the table before turning to the grinning man.

"Thanks, bro," I chuckle, watching Minseok work on the countertop in the distance with my chin in my palm. Many regulars chat him up over strong shots and fruity cocktails. "He sure is the favorite here, huh?"

"Oh yeah," Chanyeol nods while Jenny leans in across the other side of the table to whisper in my ear. "Although he doesn't play for any team."

"Really?" I whisper back with wide eyes, smiling at her confirming nod. "Good for him then."

"Excuse me, coming through." Minseok’s cheery voice is easy to hear amongst the lively bar chatter, sporting that signature smile of his; a tray full of drinks clutched firmly in his hands. "Order for table four!" He beams, setting the drinks in front of us. The usual for me, brandy for Sehun, and a Sex on the Beach for Jenny. "What's the special occasion, hmm?" He teases, rubbing his hands on the towel at his waist.

"Don't act like you don't check the group chat," Chanyeol complains, looking over at the chuckling man as he takes the empty seat across from him. Jenny scoots over to give him more room. "Riley got her first major job."

"Really?" He continues to smile, a twinkle in his eye while glancing over at me. "The baby grew huh?"

"She has left the nest." Sehun nods, ruffling my hair despite my protests; arching a brow at Jenny. "Where are Jongin and Baekhyun by the way? I understand Jongdae, but-"

"Oh would you look at that," She looks over her shoulder towards the door behind me with a relieved smile, drawing my attention there as well. "You talked them up."

Two familiar figures step into the bar, each with grim expressions on their faces as a third, shorter one is revealed when they reach the rest of us at the table. —Or well, more like the two tables we pushed together (not the least bit quiet either, might I add. Thanks Chanyeol).

"Kyungsoo?" I inquire, eyes widening at the bouquet of yellow roses, pink Peruvian lilies, purple irises, and red gladiolus flowers. Taking the small bottle of cheerwine he also hands me with a small gasp.

"Hey," He smiles a little, softly patting my hand resting on the back of my chair. "Didn't want to come empty-handed."

“Thank you,” I beam, setting the flowers on the table before opening the bottle carefully; pouring some into a spare shot glass Chanyeol slides across the table.

"Congratulations, Doll." Jongin mumbles, hands stuffed deep inside the pockets of his black slacks. Keeping a fair distance between us.

The smile I send his way is an apologetic one; especially with the pair of eyes watching us like a hawk. "Thanks, bro," I mutter as he walks on to take a seat; that sinking feeling once again filling my chest.

"Hey," An unmistakable voice whispers in my ear.

I turn a bit towards Baekhyun, smiling politely despite the chaste kiss he presses to my forehead. "Hi."

He pulls out the chair next to me while I pretend to focus on the conversation Chanyeol, Jongin, and Sehun are having across the table about the boring subject of weight lifting. Trying hard not to think about how adorable he looks with a black blazer, white dress shirt, and that matching bow-tie around his neck. Gorgeous silver hair styled in a subtle—yet just as knee-weakening��comma hairstyle.

"How have you been?" Baekhyun softly murmurs, his voice nearly drowned out by everything around us.

"I can bench press more than the both of you combined!"

"Shut up, Yeol."

"I've been okay," Smiling lightly, I turn back to my neglected drink to avoid his eye; idly wiping away condensation from the side of the cold glass. My attention instantly snatched away by a familiar hand gently taking mine away from the object.

"Can we talk after this?" His voice is barely above a hush, only loud enough for me to hear. The gleam of sincerity in his tired eyes has my heart aching and soaring at the same time.

I take a swig of my drink, simply nodding despite the burn, "Sure."

He watches me for a moment, seeming to be looking for something beyond my nonchalant expression; probably trying to see past the walls I've put up. A small sigh falls from his lips, the warm pillows shortly pressing a soft kiss to the back of my hand, "Okay."

He doesn't let go of my hand, choosing to tangle our fingers together before setting them on his thigh. The warmth on my cheeks is not coming from the gentle strokes of his thumb on my skin or the sweet tingle that kiss left in its wake. Nope. Not at all.

Gradually, the conversation at the table switches to more lighthearted topics. Everyone pitching in with little tidbits of their daily lives as if sensing the tension between the quietest men among us. Even Kyungsoo goes into detail about the newest dish added to the menu of his restaurant.

Baekhyun's shoulder looks comfier by the second with every sip of cherry soda and bold vodka I take. A particularly hilarious story of Chanyeol's sends me reeling; hiding my face in his gorgeous neck. His little shiver when my lips accidentally brush over his warm skin doesn't go unnoticed by me.

Baekhyun meets my gaze, his brown eyes darker than they were before as his tongue glides over his bottom lip; pink lips curling up into a knowing little smirk at my unwavering stare.

"Hey, guys!" A light voice chimes, a soothing timbre that sails above the bar chatter like an unsuspecting breeze; breaking us out of our little bubble.

Just about everyone at the table turns to the newcomer with wide eyes. Sehun and I share the same confused look before I slightly twist around in my chair to see.

"Yixing?" Baekhyun's eyes are wide, brows soon furrowing at the three unexpected people approaching our table. A tall man with kind eyes and raven hair is accompanied by an equally stunning woman, her black hair falling to her mid-waist. Minseok gets up to make room for the all-too-familiar brunet striding in front with a satisfied smirk on his face. "Sora? Dae? I didn’t know you all were coming…"

"Hi, Baekhyunnie," Sora damn near purrs, red-painted fingertips brushing his shoulder as she walks by with Yixing by her side. The oblivious man envied while I blink slowly, eyes narrowed closely on her smug form; recognition taking longer than I'd like to set in. It's the secretary Baekhyun supposedly fired. But wait… Weren't there two of them?...

"It's about time everyone meets your girlfriend, Baek." Jongdae drawls, smiling innocently enough while taking his seat. Gleefully twinkling eyes glancing over at Jenny when she smacks his arm, giving him a warning glare.

A few more drinks in and everyone seems to relax; easy going inhibitions and loosened mouths. Now we've moved on to telling old college stories. Minseok is currently recalling a time a classmate had mistaken him for being her star quarterback boyfriend.

"He acted as if he'd beat him to a pulp not knowing that Minseok is actually made of steel." Yixing grins lopsidedly in humor, head tilted to inspect the contents swirling within his glass.

"I challenged him to arm wrestling once." Chanyeol reminisces with a shiver, taking a gulp of his second refill. "Never again."

"Bro, this man could toss you over his shoulder and run a mile, I swear." Jongin's tone has a hint of a whine to it, elbows holding his weight upon the table directly across from Baek. Kyungsoo is quick to slide their glasses out the way of his clumsy hand gestures.

"Sure," Sehun mutters, half-lidded eyes rolling in exaggeration.

"I know from experience..." Jongin grumbles, a hilariously offended look on his face.

I laugh quietly, catching Minseok's eye. "Easy as pie," He smirks behind the rim of his glass, lifting it in a playful cheer and winking mischievously.

"Easy for you to say," Chanyeol full-on complains, the large distance kept between him and Sora causes his arm to constantly bump into Sehun. "Remember that time you slipped off the pier? I almost broke my back tryna pull you back up!"

I laugh harder, having to cling onto Baekhyun's arm before I fall out of my chair, a burning stare makes my eyes drift over to Jongdae.

The table seems to settle down, everyone looking at the narrowed eyed man as well.

"Hey Jongdae, you good man?" Minseok jokes, tentatively nudging his side.

The brunet comes out of his trance, throwing his head back in that rambunctious laughter that never leads to anything good. "Oh yeah." He grins, words noticeably slurred. "Please forgive me, I was just struck by deja vu." His eyes drag over to Baekhyun, curled lip smile widening in glee. "Isn't this scenario familiar to you Baek?" His voice dips in emphasis on the word ‘familiar’ as if it's a hint to an inside joke. "Very very familiar."

"O-kay," Jenny steps in hurriedly as I feel Baekhyun stiffen; she reaches for the shot glass clutched in Jongdae's palms. "I think you’d had enough-"

"How is she, by the way?" He brushes her off, sending the glass falling over onto the table; contents spilled while Minseok is quick to catch it before it hits the floor. "Have you heard from her lately? I mean, she sure is pretty active in our old group chat-"

Chanyeol and Jongin stand up, assisting her in hoisting him up before escorting a blabbering Jongdae outside; the brunet practically a dead-weight. Apologizes are directed to everyone they accidentally bump into along the way; Kyungsoo shortly following behind to help. The worried yet knowing look they all share while stepping out the door is imprinted on my mind. Along with the fact both my potential rides are gone unless I plan to catch a cab with Sehun...

"Want me to drive you home?" Baekhyun murmurs quietly after a while, soft lips caressing the shell of my ear.

I try my best not to shiver, turning to him with what I hope is my best pleading eyed expression. An incoming headache and the desire to sleep it off overpowering all other thoughts as I meet his warm brown orbs, "Please?"

Based on the way his eyes soften even more, I think it worked. "Come on." He offers his hand, smiling a little when I stumble trying to get off of my high chair.

A gust of wind blows just as we step out into the busy street. Baekhyun wordlessly places his blazer on my shoulders. A small smile curls my lips at the gesture; widening further when his warm hand searches for mine, tucking our joined hands into his pocket. His secure hold makes my heart race while we walk to his car parked at a meter on the other side of the road.

"Thank you," I mumble as he opens the passenger door, hiding my heated cheeks in the fabric of his blazer. Heart exhilarating at the lingering scent of vanilla, laundry detergent, and him. I take my phone off of airplane mode once settled in the comfortable leather seat.

Just as we pull off the curb, a loud ding! disrupts the quiet atmosphere. I pull my phone from my hoodie pocket, eyes widening at the messages that come streaming in.

"What is it?" Baekhyun asks curiously with a brief glance, noting the look on my face.

"It's...mom," I mumble, blinking sluggishly; squinting a little at the bright screen. "She's asking when I plan to visit."

"Ahh..." He hums, fingers tapping on the steering wheel. We fall quiet once again, nothing heard except the late-night traffic, low radio volume, and my nails tapping away on my phone screen.

"I wouldn't mind meeting your mom," He mumbles after awhile.

My head snaps over to him at that, neck painfully cracking from the sharp movement. "What?"

"I wouldn't mind meeting your mom." He looks over at me at a red light. "What?" His tone is softer, uncertainty filling his eyes. "Do you not want me to-"

"No!" I interject a bit too hurriedly, backtracking at the doubtful expression playing on his handsome features. "I mean, it's not that. I just…"

He tilts his head, slivers locks of hair concealing the emotion in his brown orbs, "Just?"

"I never brought a guy home," I grumble, shifting my eyes to the view of city lights from the passenger window.

"I'd be the first?" His voice is that soft hush again, tip-toeing around questions as if I will snap at him at any moment.

"Not if you keep being an insufferable peacock," I cross my arms, sinking further down into the comfy leather seat as his wide brown eyes flick over to me.

"...I deserve that," He mumbles, lips poked out in the tiniest pout.

Taking a long look at his sulking side profile, I sigh at his slumped shoulders and the now “scolded” child-like expression on his face; turning more towards him. "Can we talk now?” Catching his eye, I elaborate. "Like really talk? This habit of going days without talking to each other cannot continue if we are going to be together, Baekhyun."

I swear I heard him utter a disgruntled, “why not?” under his breath, his grip tightening on the steering wheel.

"We are both adults here, Baek." Tucking my buzzing phone back into my pocket, I gently place my hand on his free one, interlocking our fingers. "We have to talk, listen, and compromise if we want to be healthy and not end up hating each other." Feeling him tense up, I rub my thumb over his knuckles, adding softly, "I really want us to work, but we can't keep going on this way…" I swallow hard, trying to work around the lump in my throat and tightness building up in my chest; directing my blurry eyes down to my hands. "It hurts, Baekhyun."

The car jerks violently just as I finish my sentence. I brace myself against the seat, meeting his brooding eyes with my confused ones. He's cupping my face to pull me into a deep kiss before I can say anything. The way his soft pillows slowly dance with mine causes my heart rate to escalate. Beating so loud I fear he'd hear it or feel it through his warm palms.

I pull away after a while; searching his brown orbs for answers as he caresses my cheek, leaning forward to press a kiss to my nose that leaves my feelings in an even bigger disarray.

"We will." His tone is gentle, yet firm, eyes never straying away from my own. "We will talk, just…" He falters, gaze shifting off to the side, blinking away a foreign look too soon for me to identify it before focusing his tired orbs back onto me. "Trust me, okay?"

Finding determination and a plea within those puppy eyes, I nod, keeping a resigned sigh to myself while placing my hand over his own on my cheek.

"Okay…" He seems to relax, lips brushing over mine before he moves to sit properly in the driver’s seat; starting the car back up. The journey to the dorms is spent in comfortable silence. Fingers intertwined and wild hearts in sync.

•⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •⇔♦ •

#bbh-net #Baekhyun smut #Baekhyun fluff #Baekhyun angst #Baekhyun romance #Six Phases

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alias-b · 4 years ago

Text

sins of my youth. 005

Billy Hargrove x OC! Evie Fenny~ Also posted to my AO3

Summary: It was common knowledge that Billy Hargrove hated Hawkins. Hated Cherry Lane. Even loathed the strange girl next door. Evie Fenny wasn’t too fond of the chaotic Cali transfer either. An awful high school tradition sparks a chain of events that changes everything, ultimately bringing two frayed souls together.

A/N: Well. It's time for the dance. Sigh. TW: Teenagers can be evil. Also head's up, light will be shined on an unhealthy relationship Evie is navigating. I won't get explicit with it, but we as readers are going to see red flags that our girl cannot see. Or is ignoring. Taglist open :)

Chapter 5: Skirt Safari

Evie didn’t tell anyone she was going to a dance with Billy Hargrove for New Years. Just said some party in the city. Didn’t tell her mother. Not even Heather.

Floated through the holidays with her guitar on the porch swing. Bundled up as snow fell. Little, perfect flurries. Open notebook next to her as she crossed her legs and exhaled into cold. Strumming idle tunes away from her mother’s indoor phone chatter.

A car skidded up to Billy’s house. Day before the party. Tommy’s freckled face popped out of the driver’s side with Carol getting up too.

“Hey, Fenny!” Tommy couldn’t resist prodding. “You stay on the nice list this year?”

“Don’t spend all your coal in one place.” She set one leg down. Head cocking. Billy came out of his house shrugging a jacket on. He stopped to gawk at the snow. Let it fall into his curls. Rough and ethereal.

“Let’s go.” He didn’t glance at Evie there as Tommy approached her porch steps. “Gimme the keys, I’m driving still.”

“Little birdy told me you were gonna be around on New Years.” Tommy leaned against a brick post. A broad smile.

“Oh, you guys are going too? That really makes me want to go.” Evie replied flatly. Billy smacked Tommy’s chest with a hiss at him.

“I got shit to do. C'mon.” He warned, not wanting the annoying boy to ruin his chances here.

“Don’t worry, Evie, I already have plans that night. I probably won’t be around that joint. I don’t qualify.” Carol’s bracelets clinked together when she swept her styled hair aside, undaunted by Billy's steel glaring. Tommy chuckled with her and Billy gave a growl low in his throat.

“You take requests on that thing?” Tommy continued. “Got a song for me?”

“Sure. How about this?” Evie straightened up. Strummed and tapped one foot to a beat.

“Don't stand, don't stand so… Don't stand so close to me...” Evie flashed a smile and kept playing. “How’s that?” Tommy hitched to laugh until Carol hit his chest, tugging because she was over this conversation.

Billy paused to smile at Evie there. Looking so pretty in the snow, it was criminal. Evie touched the strings to stop the flow of vibration.

“She isn’t bad.” Tommy stumbled as Carol pulled him away.

“Come on, you don’t even know what that song is about.” She peered back to glower at Evie. Lethal.

“You see? I can’t sit on my own porch without being bothered.” Brown eyes lifted to Billy as she sat back to idly move the swing with one foot.

“Never actually heard you sing.” Billy had observed instead, twisting the ring around his middle finger. No compliment or insult followed him back down the steps. Evie plucked a few cords, watching him go.

Billy wrestled Tommy for the driver’s seat. Won. Skidded off to raise hell somewhere else.

It was a clock ticking down each lazy hour as her secret hung in the air. Heather parents stole their daughter away to the Holloway's lavish cabin for a family New Years Party which took the heat off the lie.

Evie spent the whole day preparing in her bedroom. Tossed dress after dress upon her bed like she cared what Billy Hargrove thought. Decided on something short and maroon. Sleeves just above her elbows and a slight poof to the little skirt. Gave her waist a little pull and didn’t make her cleavage look half bad. Matched her nails and lip color too.

Makeup spread all over her dresser. Glittery gold shadow with a smoky haze. The dress was a metallic foil maroon, seemed fun enough for New Years. Big hoops and a necklace completed her look. Evie hurried to grasp a jacket before Billy could come to her door.

“I’m going to a New Years thing mom, I’ll be safe.” She called on the way out.

“Have fun, baby!”

“I will.” Evie sprayed amber perfume and was lotioning her hands rushing out of the house. Almost bumped into Billy on the doorstep ready to knock. His eyes narrowed.

“You didn’t tell anyone.”

“Bet you didn’t either. Do your parents know?” She slipped her jacket on. Billy blew smoke in response. He seemed annoyed today which did nothing for her nerves. “So, I put on a dress...don’t get me murdered.”

The joke seemed to go over him.

“Well, let’s go.” He turned and went toward his car, stunning in the cold and twice and rude. “Let’s just get this shit going.” A cigarette hit the pavement.

Evie didn’t move.

“Are you alright?” She asked slower.

“I just want to get there.” Billy snapped. “C’mon.”

“Listen, I really don’t have to go anywhere if you’re going to be an ass the entire time.” She crossed her arms and Billy flared up. “I spent hours getting ready for this stupid thing. This stupid thing that you pestered me to go to!”

His shoulder dropped.

“Hours, huh.” Billy came around and opened the door for her. “We can’t waste that.”

The charm reeled back.

Evie stood unmoved.

“Look, I just got into it with my old man. Wasn’t you.” Billy explained. “You lost the bet, Angel.”

“I did.” She sighed and crossed to get in. He shut the door and joined her. Turned the music down when it blared. “What’s this bar called?”

“The Dogfight.”

“Charming.” Evie stuffed a tiny wallet into the bodice of her dress. Billy eyed her chest. “Watch the road, Hargrove.”

“You spent hours getting ready for me.” He mused, rubbing his chin. “I like when a girl admits it.”

“And how long did it take you to get this hair just right?” She reached and tugged at a curl as he’d done with her so many times. He’d doused himself in that sex cologne he liked so much. A red shirt opened and tucked into the tightest jeans he could have picked out. Leather jacket again today. “We both wore maroon.”

“Looks more wine on you.” He fussed at that.

“Just saying.” Evie broke to smile. “I meant it, don’t get me murdered.”

“We get in, we snag some drinks, we get out. The streets are going to be chaos; it should be fun.” Billy turned onto the main roads. Sped beyond all the other cars.

“I’m not letting you drive drunk.”

“A motel is always an option for me, sweet cheeks.” Billy clicked his tongue.

“With two beds, ponyboy.” She only grinned, undaunted. “I lost a bet, not all my morals.”

Billy laughed, picking up speed.

“We can loosen those up tonight.”

** ** **

“What do you drink, Angel, an appletini?” Billy dragged Evie into a dark lit bar. Pink and yellow lights shooting all directions. Metallic streamers hanging and swaying with the dancers already smashed on the floor. Evie looked down at his hand as he peered around and brought her all the way to a corner table near the window.

Even settled a menu on the other side like they might be hiding behind it.

"Something with a little pink umbrella?" He continued, eyes on the window. Drunks sang along the streets in their party clothes.

“Try whiskey. I’m going to need one for this.” She caught Billy’s head whipping around. “Who are you looking for?”

“No one, I-fuck!” The gorgeous boy lost all composure and skidded out of his chair when a bare ass pressed the window. Evie gasped and covered her eyes, pouty lips slack. Kind of enjoyed Billy losing his cool. “Asshole!” Music overlapped the chaos. Tommy fucking H howled with laughter on the other end, pulling his pants up.

"Fuck." Billy sank back into his chair. "Shithead."

Tommy swaggered in still laughing, had a woman on his arm that wasn’t Carol.

She was clearly older, wrinkled and fatigued. Maybe forty. Wearing a tight purple lace number that was not keeping her warm or fitting correctly. Jean jacket. Fishnets. Smudged makeup. Big beehive hairstyle. She smelled like sweet pineapple and chain smoked her teeth brown and broken.

Billy and Evie exchanged looks because she was also clearly a lady of the night.

“Tommy...who is your new friend?” Billy asked slower. All teeth.

“Her name’s Bubbles.” Tommy was shorter than her in those heels. Head on her shoulder with the cheesiest grin. “She’s a real winner.”

“Charmed, handsome.” The woman rasped and reached for Billy’s hand then Evie’s. “Like the shadow, sweetie, it suits you.”

“Thank you,” she blushed. “I like your beetle hairpin.”

“We’re going to hit the dance floor,” Tommy scanned Evie, “good to see you here, Fenny.”

“Right.” She glanced at Billy as they left. “What was that about?”

“He’s drunk. Probably sad about some dumb shit with Carol, they’ll be screwing again before school starts.” Billy said that quicker than intended. A light bulb went off in his head. “Drinks. Wait here.”

“Thanks.” Evie recognized teens from her school and rivals.

“Fenny!” A couple football players spotted her inside. Poked until the window tilted open. “What’s a pretty girl doing in this dump?”

“Our girl who brought Tannen down a couple pegs.”

Questionable Hawkins High Fame.

“Just enjoying New Years.” Evie giggled there fiddling with her nails.

“If someone messes with you, let the guys know, we’re down the block. That bar on the corner.” They started off.

“Will do, boys.” She jilted when Billy smacked a drink down, sitting. “Thank God.”

“He ain't here. Thank me." Billy leaned over to see her. Crossed his arms as she drank. "You don’t party this hard?”

“We snuck into a bar, did you even get carded?”

“Told you, no one cares.” He gulped his own glass down. “Stop worrying.”

Evie just drank more in response.

"You established I only go to lame high school parties." Evie paused to see him. "Kind of waiting for a rain of pig's blood here. I guess I actually want a good night."

"I wouldn't say it's asking a lot." Blue eyes went to the table, paint chipping away from wood. There was an uneasy beat before he softened. “Another? It’s open for the party. Free shit even after twelve.”

“Please.” She followed him this time. Felt the burn in her throat as they leaned there together. "So, why-?"

“Hey, Fenny.” Brock Tannen’s sculpted face craned over her shoulder. Billy tensed, jaw twitching. “Boy, am I shocked to see you here. With Keg King Billy Hargrove. Apply enough heat and even the ice queen melts. Must be a Cali boy thing.”

“You’d be about Antarctica.” Evie replied. He only smiled. Eyes shifted to Billy.

“Hope you stick around to midnight, have fun you two.” Brock pulled a girl off with him, staring at him like he was a pot of gold at the end of a spring rainbow. Little blonde with some acne scars she tried to cover with make-up. An eyeshadow look in blue to match her dress that must have taken hours to perfect. Two missing teeth in her mouth. Skin and bone thing. Young looking.

“Asshole.” They said at the same time. Tension broke. Billy chuckled and she peered in the direction Brock had gone into.

“Did you see that girl with him?”

“No, who?” Billy scratched the back of his neck. Kept looking around.

“Ah, nothing.” Evie brought the glass to her lips again and sipped. Screens all over this bar and the city played the party in New York. Commotion in the streets marked with loud party goers. “So, what’s there to do before midnight hits?”

“Whatever the fucking fuck hell we want.” Billy tapped his glass to hers and downed it. Relished the burn.

“You like to swear.”

“No, I like to drink.” He corrected, offering her a menu. “Eat something.”

“We gotta pay for food.”

“I’m buying, I invited you.” Came a shrug. “Pick some shit out.”

“You want food, honey pie?” A man flocked over.

“Damn right, I do.” Evie peered at Billy. Amused. “I’ll take the fucking chicken tenders with a side of bitching fries.”

“Ketchup?” They were writing, amused because she was cute even still.

“Fuck yes. Um, please.” She gestured to Billy with his jaw slack open. “And who knows what this asshole wants.”

“Blondie?”

“Ah...I’ll just have another drink. Fucking beer.” He batted his lashes.

“Wonderful.” The man slid off snickering.

“What was that, Fenny?”

“I swear, but not like you. It sounded like fun to try it out.” She covered her lips to giggle. “Why didn’t you get food? We’re drinking and it’s going to be a long night.”

“Long night, you say? So, you want to stick around for the whole party.”

“I put on a dress and makeup. People are going to see me and the effort I made.” She set her jaw on her chin. “Avoided the question.”

“I only had enough cash for one meal. Rest is if we need the motel.”

“Billy, you should have said something! I have a few bucks on me somewhere.” Evie frowned when he got his beer.

“Doesn’t matter, you’re probably a lightweight. Get food in your stomach before you down more free whiskey.” He brushed it off quickly, blue eyes on the windows. Evie’s food came and she slid it between them.

“It’s hot, have some. Don’t make me feed you, I won't be my mother..” She pressed and pouted until Billy snagged a piece of chicken. They shared the basket, licking warm fingers clean. Billy took the thumb he licked and fixed her lipstick, earning a snort of protest.

“Ick.” She cocked her head away, amused. “Thanks, mom.”

“You know, it took me ages to place that tiny accent you got. But, it’s so Louisiana. Mona rubbed off on you.” Billy pointed when Evie had gotten a new drink.

"It's not."

“Let’s get air, I think some idiot is setting off fireworks in the street.” They got up to get away from the crowds. Evie noticed the odd couples. Scanned before Billy was pulling at her wrist through the mess of dancing bodies. Cool air chilled her pink cheeks as they got down the block to pause. Billy sighed and set one foot on the brick behind him to light up.

“Don’t have an accent," Evie picked up again, "that’s all mom.”

“Born and bred in Louisiana, it’s sticking to you too.” Billy offered the smoke.

“Not good for the singing voice.” She declined so he puffed again. Groups were already tossing balloons and confetti about. Bar hopping from club to club. Evie pulled her coat closer. “I don’t have an accent. You have one, west coast.”

Billy watched her look up at the few stars that decided to come out over the city.

“I haven’t been to California. Been to Vegas a couple times. All the women in my family descend upon that city every few years and I always had to tag along. Not much for me to do but look at the lights.”

“My dad says Vegas is full of swindlers and whores.”

“He strikes me to think that about most places.” She chuckled and Billy agreed, stepping on the butt of his cigarette. “This your first time out here?”

“Yeah.” He sucked in some air, tongue sweeping his lip.

“Hargrove's never been to New Orleans. I bet you’d like the food, it’s unreal.”

“You haven’t had the food in Cali.” Billy quipped, scooting in next to her to see the sky that had her so enamored. “Never really have to deal with the fucking cold.”

“I always wondered how you stayed warm in those clothes.” Evie’s giggle cut the second he pressed into her.

“I just tuck in next to a warm girl, Fenny, it isn’t rocket science.” A breath touched the air and Evie felt herself spark. Saw those same stars glittering brighter within Billy’s eyes. A distant shore calling them both home.

Evie felt those flower petals whirling around her stomach like butterfly wings. Burrowing deep to bloom with new life inside her. Vibrant colors she hid from the world spinning to unfurl. Billy looked into her soul and saw the colors dance neon. Wind picked up their curls with gentle caresses. A pull of vines and thorns bubbled up too. Twisted every way to protect Evie in the only way they knew how.

She could feel Billy’s chest heaving with air. Hard and flush into her skin, stealing warmth. Admiring the echo of lights behind her brown eyes. If she opened her mouth, a rose might blossom on her tongue. Billy wondered about tasting it for himself. He dared to inch in and she spun out.

“It’s a nice night. Beautiful.”

“Let’s get a beer to go take a hike from this place. We’ll make it back before the ball drops.” Billy figured he could just keep her from the main party and she wouldn’t notice the odd couplings within. They delved in and out of bars. Watched the mayhem in the streets. Even caught a totally illegal race or two. Sparklers on every corner underscored by laughter and jeers.

“What’s next for you, after school?”

“Save money to hightail it out of here. See the beach again and get a shitty job.” Billy gulped, licking his lips after. “You going to college?”

“Probably just the local community college, more focused on my songs. My mom and I keep trying to put it out there. Something’s holding me back.” Evie saw him peer at her to continue as they clicked along the cool sidewalks. Decorations scattered all over the buildings and streets. “What if these big time producers don’t like them? My songs. I mean, what if they tell me I’m no good?” She paced ahead to ramble. “I just don’t think I can take that kind of rejection.”

“So, you find some asshole who wants to put you on the radio.” Billy chuckled. “You had entire albums on your walls. You want it bad, chica.”

“What about you?” Evie gestured with the bottle. “What secret hobbies and talents does Billy Hargrove hide away?”

“I care about my car and that’s about as deep as I go, Angel.” He winked, tossing his empty into the trash so she finished her own and followed. Swallowed the froth down. Evie hurried to nudge into him.

“C’mon. You’re a good enough student. I see the grades you get in our classes.”

“All to keep my old man off my shit. Not like that works.” Billy stopped at a crosswalk, settled his hand on the bar so Evie slipped under it to lean there and make him look at her. He couldn't help the smirk at this playful side.

“Who will I tell?”

“Heather, most likely.” Came the quick reply.

“I don’t tell her everything,” Evie trailed off with her eyes wandering, a sly smile pressed, “I sing, sew, play the guitar, and collect little trinkets. Buttons. Rocks and crystals. Old coins and keys. Little vintage ceramic and porcelain figures. And I needle felt.”

“What’s that?”

“You stab wool with a special needle until it makes a pretty shape. You probably caught a few things in my room. On the bookcase.”

“You’re a hoarder.”

“I’m very organized.” Evie giggled as they crossed the street. In their own little bubble, ignoring all the festivities around them.

“What can’t you do?”

“I can bake alright, but it's messy. Not a great cook. I’m hopeless, my mother gave up trying with me. I also can’t get my leg behind my head. But, I’m close.” Her joke brought a full laugh out of him. Angelic sort of sound. “I’m serious.”

“You’ll have to demonstrate, I don’t believe it.” Billy stood in front of her, walking still and chuckling as he went.

“Fat chance.” Her heels picked up to get beside him. They passed a window full of TVs and stopped to see all the parties playing within each screen. “You ever think the world is too big? We don't have enough time to experience all of it, I mean.”

Billy only puffed.

“So, what can you do?” Evie pressed again.

“I can cook alright. I don’t know, I just do good in school because the shit’s never been hard on me. Used to surf,” he glanced at her, “back in Cali.”

“I’m not a strong swimmer.” Evie said, looking up at him and the lights playing on his stunning face. Followed the curve of his jaw down his neck. “You know, Heather lifeguards at the pool every summer. She’d help you get a gig if you need a job when school is out. Probably prefer you over the other jerks that apply.”

“Not as bad as the other jerks, I like that.” Billy mused, eyes flicking all around. Caught in stars again. “Hey, there’s the LA bash. Miss that shit. Music scene raged pretty hard.” The way he smiled melted Evie all the way to the pavement. Billy standing there lax and missing home. Displaying his own lush colors. Dreaming and feral.

“You’re always writing in class when you’re not drawing dicks in textbooks.” Evie observed, earning an amused look in response. “Do you like that stuff? Stories?”

“My mom used to say I told better stories than she did. I’d tell her them to help her sleep.” Billy admitted, blinking a couple times before the illusion shattered and he went stony again. Paced around Evie to continue.

“You could write books, get more into English. Make some money being an author. Sell stories to the big screen.”

“Burn out and go broke, sure.” Billy lit up another cigarette, gave this entertained puff. His wall went up higher and Evie stayed too soft. “End up teaching some snots like that jerk, Bowers.”

“He’s not a jerk.”

“Not to the girls in class.” Billy flicked his ashes. “Probably likes you and Carol fighting for his attention.”

“We don’t…” Evie went red as an apple. “I don’t. Carol’s just jealous of the attention he gives me.”

“Still weird. She hates that you’re a teacher’s pet. Don’t know why you’d want to be.” Smoke edged from his lips.

“It’s nice when someone is respectful once in a while to a girl like me. When they listen, you know?” Evie held herself as they walked along a bit slower. “He respects me and what I have to say.”

“Shouldn’t trust someone just because they’re being nice to you, Evie.” Billy had this distant expression when he said that. Full of ocean waves rolling into a peaceful shore.

"Nice is still better than..." She never finished and Billy didn't ask her to.

They peered at all the buildings illuminated before them. The skyscrapers pointing straight to heaven. Music boomed from several clubs, mingling all the celebrations together.

“Want to head back? Get another hard drink.”

“I’d like that.” She admitted, shuffling some.

“Move it, Fenny, free alcohol doesn’t happen every day for us.” Billy snatched her by the hand, picked up the pace until they were both laughing and out of breath. Reeling around drunk groups of friends to squeeze back up to the bar.

The hard notes of Joy Division’s “Love Will Tear us Apart” began after the second round. Evie was swaying already as they stood at the corner of the bar counter.

“Do you dance, Angel?” Billy cocked his head.

“Sometimes. If I’m supposed to be onstage one day, I have to.” She giggled, bubbling and pink like champagne. “You?”

“Fuck, no. Just bounce around and smash into people at concerts.”

“That counts!” Her voice picked up over the ruckus. People dressed in glitter and metallic moved together above a floor that lit up. Gave the place an opulent vibe.

“You look like you want to get out there!” Billy leaned toward her. The third round came.

“We don’t have to!” Evie was pressed all the way into him. Both shouting at each other out of necessity. A pulse pounded their flesh apart. Jackets were left on a chair next to Tommy and his date.

Billy sank his drink in one go so Evie followed.

“I asked you here, I’ll ask you to dance if I want!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!” Billy echoed, sweeping Evie by the waist out with him. Bodies swayed all directions. Smashed them even closer together. Curls bounced.

Evie got swept up in the lights dancing on her skin. Blue and red glows now. She let her head tip back and moved with Billy there. He watched her intently, felt the whole world slow. Smiled brighter than he should have. Hot and sparking.

Electric and dreamy. Fizzling neon in their hungry veins. Bodies heating and sweaty. Nothing mattered in these lights though, something freeing there.

Didn’t even care that it was fucking Cyndi Lauper blasting.

“Girls just wanna have fun!” Evie sang along. She came alive under these glimmers in the crowds. Like she was the only one there. Every song change, they banged to each beat and never seemed to tire of it.

And then the mood tipped. Tempered with that damn Foreigner song about love. Billy and Evie stilled with it. Looked out at the couples coming together for a slow dance.

“Uh,” Evie swallowed harder and tucked some unruly curls behind her ear, “did you want to…?”

“We’re doing this fucking party right. You asked for two things. A good night and no murder, I can manage that much.” Billy stole her forward. He tried to blame the alcohol.

Dipped a palm around the small of her back to bring her into his chest. Inches shorter, her eyes popped open. Lips parted with no words in sight. The alcohol in their bellies caught fire. He grabbed her hand and she laced their fingers without a thought about it. It was bold, how he touched her and Evie wasn't used to that.

“There ya go. Just sway some.”

Evie pressed her lips and broke that eye contact because it was turning her back to mush. Stared at the saint chain around Billy's neck. There was a pleasant glisten upon his taut chest from sweat. She got drunk off his stupid cologne. Let him inhale her perfume in turn. Boiling amber gleaming to stunt all his senses. Hint of sweet vanilla lotion.

Unabashed, Billy pressed into her body. Not thinking she took up too much space or she wasn’t desirable. No, Evie Fenny was perfectly covetable. With her batting lashes and lights highlighting a glow upon her high cheeks. They swayed together between couples so Evie brought her arm over his shoulder. Gathered the bravery to see his eyes again, already looking at her face.

“Billy,” Evie curled her fingers into his shirt, “why am I here?"

“Because I asked you.” Billy spun her around under all the stars and streamers.

“Why’d you ask me?” She searched him. Saw his eyes flicker beyond her a couple times.

“Because I wanted to, Evie.”

“Why’d you want to?” Her tone etched into him, gentle as she could with another change of songs. Something older from the 70s by Kate Irving. Her little voice filling the space around them.

Billy just kept spinning Evie there at the center of the floor and they looked at each other without even getting dizzy. Let the world tilt while they stayed static. Silence crept and it was stunning.

I'm afraid 'cause it feels too good

And I want it too bad

“Because you called me pretty.” Billy winked that time. Devilish. “At that party on Loch Nora.”

“When we yelled at each other?” Evie felt the tension break and spill out. “I said your eyes were pretty.”

“Same thing.”

I never dreamed someone like you

Could want someone like me

Her head came to his collar when she laughed that time. The heart under his skin picked up.

“Evie.” Billy pressed then so she came up. The syllables died on his tongue. “We’re here and I like it. So, it doesn’t fucking matter.”

“No, I guess not.” She let herself smile into his skin when her head dropped again. A slight giggle. “I like it too.”

“Good.” Billy hit that word hard. They spun and spun to the flow of sound and lights. Drank it all in. Until it was seconds to midnight. Couples were stilling to count.

Billy looked at Brock raising his drink across the way.

Twenty seconds.

He peered down at Evie when her eyes lifted to see him.

Just one kiss, he could have stolen it.

And he couldn’t do it.

Their hands dropped away. Evie smiled at the scene. Everyone celebrating the birth of this new year. It felt magical. Too good to let flutter away.

Billy just looked at her and Evie breathed.

It happened too fast.

Soft hands on his jaw while she came to her toes and gave him one peck upon his lips. So inordinate in sweetness that Billy felt his eyes water.

Instantly she slipped back down. Still beaming brighter than any star this night.

A thank you for every single smile he’d painted upon her face in these short hours. For his boldness and his touch without fear.

A kiss where there were no thorns for the first time in all her life.

Billy had never been given such a kiss. It was gift wrapped. Something so signature for him from this girl. This girl he decided he liked to be around. He gasped the moment she let him go. Caught Brock laughing all the way across the room.

“No.” He said. Crushed somehow.

“No?” Evie’s head cocked in confusion.

“Happy New Year!” Echoes and fireworks blasted. Everyone jumping up and down while Billy and Evie remained still as marble. Locked into each other.

"Ah, I mean..." With midnight gone, Billy pulled her in. Decided to make this one count.

Palms cupped Evie’s face. Brought her back with the slightest gasp he drank down. Kissed her full on the mouth like he'd been thinking about it all night. Billows of shiny confetti fell over them. Stuck to hair and clothing. Caught on flushed cheeks. Even tickled the kiss and made them laugh into it. Evie held his wrists, tried to remain steady until she had to part and angle to go back in.

“Why?” She hitched the hot word against him.

“Because I want to.” Billy uttered, mouth open just a little to coax her back in.

This candied confetti kiss she’d remember forever. And the beautiful boy who opened his heart just enough to share it with her. Evie shined at him when she drew out enough to see his eyes. Billy’s thumbs drew shapes into her cheeks.

A finger had to playfully swipe a bit of caught confetti from her bottom lip so he could taste her again. Utterly divine.

Evie’s arms slipped around his neck. Pulled.

“Let’s get out of here,” Billy spoke between kisses. “Yeah? Let’s just go somewhere.”

Her lashes fluttered at him. Same sensation drew up her stomach before she was nodding.

“Okay.” Nerves crept. Billy smacked their lips together one last time. Like he wanted her and only her for the rest of this night. “I have to, um...restroom.”

“I’ll grab our coats.” Billy’s hands brought hers down. Held them. He seemed in a hurry. “Meet me at the door. We’ll go.”

Evie floated off into the wave of bodies so Billy sped to Tommy’s table. Bubbles must have excused herself too.

“Man, you tongued, Fenny. It was actually kinda hot.” Tommy raised his hand for a high five that was ignored. “I won the pot, you know.”

“You paid that girl.” Billy snatched their coats up.

“Yeah, no one has to know that. Don’t get me disqualified.” Tommy leaned over. A hand clapped Billy on the back.

“I’m so impressed. She kissed you, man. Whatever you did, I want that power.” Brock laughed loudly. “She was all over you, and that bit after midnight. Poor girl. Thinking anyone would ever-”

“Man, just shut up.” Billy shoved to pass him. "Let's just forget this shit ever happened."

“Oh, no, B. I don't think we will. You probably just want your reward. You earned it.” The horrible boy made it a point to count each bill carefully until he pressed it at Billy’s chest. “Good work. Maybe you can get a blowy out of her before you drop her off at home. My date’s good for one too before I call her a taxi.”

Billy shoved the money into his pocket. Felt like trash. Eyes anywhere else.

“Whatever, man.”

** ** **

At the same time, Evie stumbled to the sink and washed her hands. Cloud nine. Sang to herself out of habit.

“Oh, but anyone...who knows what love is…” She looked at that reflection. This breathless, kiss smothered girl who was grinning. Happy. Dabbed under her eyes to fix the makeup with a cold paper towel. “...would understand.”

“Pretty pipes you got there, sweetie pie.” The scratching voice called before a stall opened. Tommy’s date. “Nice night, huh?”

“The best.” Evie was still dancing in a dream, showered in confetti.

“Wasn’t as bad as I thought. Free meal. Pretty guy who treats you right for a night. Not a bad gig. Not at all.” The lady came to the mirror. Washed her hands and started to apply some extra make up. “Stupid name though. Skirt Safari.”

“What?” Evie’s head cocked. Hip leaning into the sink.

“Oh, baby. You should open those big eyes.” The woman puckered up and put a lipstick into her tiny clutch. “Tommy told me everything. Tradition. These boys bring a date. The ugliest girl gets them the win and they get some money. Stupid high school thing. And I won. Tommy said I’d get a bonus for that.”

“They…” Evie felt her entire heart sink. The vines and their thorns wrapped tighter around her heart until it bled. Like it never wanted to be touched again. “Wait, Billy…he...we-” No breath came into her lungs, it was all punched out. Ruthless and swift.

“The world is unkind to us, sweets.” Bubbles sighed at her reflection. “We have to find that kindness where we can. While we can. Just enjoy it because you never know what the next day will bring. Husbands who like to hit. Women who walk out on their babies.”

“It’s not fair.” Evie tremored there. Unable to move so Bubbles gave her cheek a pat.

“I know. But, we don’t let them see they’ve beaten us down. Do we?” Bubbles smiled at her without fear in her heart. And it was tragic because no one cared about her strength, all they saw was how she looked. “My ma always said to be brave and kind. Not everyone’s parents give that advice. But, they should. Be a better world.”

“My mom says that also.” Evie’s fists closed. Passionate tears sprang to be blinked away. “I really hope the world is kind to you tomorrow too.”

The woman paused. Gave this fluttered smile when her eyes watered. Evie was marching away from her. Shoving through the crowds where Billy stood with Brock and Tommy.

Billy saw her expression and she caught fire.

“Skirt Safari, huh,” Evie shoved him into the bar, ripped her coat from his arms. Billy just gave this opened mouth look of horror. She laughed cruelly and Brock joined her, tugging some of his friends to see. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“It wasn’t like that.” Billy pushed up.

“No, Evie, he’s right. Your boy didn’t take you because you’re ugly.” Brock was still chortling, holding his stomach. “Three hundred bucks to get him to take the Hawkins Ice Queen. And you were so easy, girl. We all took notes.”

“Shut up!” Billy had snapped.

“You didn’t disappoint, he was supposed to kiss you before midnight. But, you earned him the win all on your own!” They clapped and laughed at her there. Evie shook and growled. Shoulders raised. Cackling hyenas.

“Three hundred, wow.” Calming, brown eyes snapped to Billy. “You should have held out. Tannen hates me so much, I bet you could have gotten five. Maybe seven.”

“She’s right, man!”

“Evie, it-”

“You’re all disgusting!” She swept her hand out. Came to Billy’s face. Her tone thickened, but she didn’t cry. Not one drop for any of them. Vibrating so hard with fury that her hand came up. Billy saw it. Waited. Didn’t flinch the way he did at home. Figured he deserved this one.

Silence drowned the boys behind her.

“I want to hit you,” she let her lip wobble, “you know why I’m not. You know.”

“Evie.” Billy had nothing. Nothing to give her. Nothing to make her stop shaking.

“You’re all horrible. Disgusting, pieces of shit. Bet Tannen gave you an earful about me. Fuck you both.” Evie leaned out, looked around. “You know, I don’t care why I’m here. What’s awful is every stunning woman you animals brought here will always deserve more than the world can ever give them. You’re the fucking beasts.”

She tore away to go outside. Marched through all the jubilation. Steaming.

“Evie!” Billy was running after her. Yanking at her wrist after she got her coat on.

“Don’t touch me!” A shriek had him skidding backwards.

“Let me fucking explain this.”

“Nothing to explain. Brock paid you to thaw the ice queen. Jokes on you! I’m not even a virgin! I’m not a prize, I’m not anything to you.” She shoved him again because he kept grabbing at her. Trying to slow her down.

“Let me drive you home.” Billy insisted. “Let me get you home safe. I won’t even talk. Hate me forever. Evie, wait, damn it!”

“Leave me alone!” Her scream sparked some attention. She got colder. Sneered at his eyes. “You’re not worth it, Billy.”

Something about that struck an arrow to his heart.

"You talked all this shit about fire's starting and getting out and I..." She hitched to get lower. "I trusted you. I believed it, you made me believe it...you're disgusting." A scream perched in her throat, but never left.

"Just let me-"

"No! I don't have to listen to any of this, so just leave me alone!" Evie kept pushing back at him.

“Hey, hey, back off the lady!” Those football players from Hawkins were descending. Grasping Billy by the arms. “Hargrove bothering you?”

“Yes!” Evie shot out, eyes on Billy’s face. “He’s bothering me!”

“Let go of me!” Billy struggled so Evie began to run. As far and as fast as she could until she couldn’t hear him anymore. Fireworks banged over their heads. Exploding to rain down.

Her chest seized so she went to the first payphone she saw. Dialed a number she shouldn’t have.

“Mmm, yes? Who is this?”

“I know you said not to call, I need you. Can you pick me up?” Evie shut her eyes so tight. One tear fell. “Please.”

A sigh.

“Evie? What happened? Where are you?”

Evie finished the call. Went into an alley so Billy wouldn’t find her. Waited there in the cold. Tried to hide from the pretty explosions in the sky.

They rang too loud upon her ears. Started to sound like thunder. Evie shut her eyes. Began to rock. Felt out of her skin and trapped in it at the same time. No control. Nothing. Just an ache while the vines crushed her heart. Hands covered her ears.

A lighter palm touched her shoulder.

“Evie.”

“Fredrick.” She reeled up. Tossed herself into his arms. Sobbed so hard and betrayed herself.

“Hey, hey. I got you.”

“Can we go? Can we go home?” She wept, ruining his shirt with makeup and glitter. “Can you take me to your place? I didn’t...I didn’t tell my mom where I was. I don’t want her to know. I don’t want anyone to know.”

Bowers was already buckling her into the car. Evie curled up under his coat when he offered it. The air conditioning calmed her some until she was biting her fist to stop the flow. Blood welled under teeth.

“What happened?”

Evie sniffled.

“They...They all laughed at me.”

** ** **

Curls ruffled out on a towel that smelled of pine an hour later. Feet padded out of the bathroom. Evie in a soft grey robe. Cloth dragged upon the floor until she saw Fredrick in bed. Seated up with little reading glasses to mark some papers down. Handsome.

“You really won’t tell me what all happened?” He mused.

“Just some stupid boys.” Evie played with the tie at her waist. “You told me to go out with a stupid boy my age. Remember? At the end of summer. After everything I let you do to me. Did...Did you get bored of me? Was that it?”

"No, Evie. You don't understand."

"You told me we had to stop, why did we start?"

“I remember.” He sighed, settling his work aside. “It was for the best. I thought. You're all I think about, did you know that? I want to be with you, but there are rules in place. They don't believe what we have can overcome.”

Wearing nothing but some boxers and a clean, white tee. His feet touched the floor before he rubbed his head.

“You still look so good in my robe.” He sounded bashful when he said that. Eyes drinking her in and averting. "You're all sin, Evangeline."

She shuffled. Shy. Uneasy. Ignoring it.

“Used to say that a lot.” Evie pressed her lips up.

“And I mean it every time.”

“I meant what I said...before summer ended. You remember that too?”

“You know I do, Evie.” Fredrick rubbed his eyes. Swept his hair between those soft fingers. Evie crossed to him.

“We were together the year. You weren’t my first, but you were the first man I ever loved. We spent all of that summer together and you told me we had to stop. Out of the blue. You talked of us running away from this place and getting married and it hurt me.”

“I’m your teacher. If people found out about us... They'd never understand.”

“You waited a year to stop us. Why kiss me if you knew we'd end? I didn’t tell anyone. Not even my best friend.” Evie reached out. Touched his shoulder. “You miss me and I miss you.”

“I’m weak for you, Evie. You know that.” Fredrick let her climb into his lap. “You’re so different and special. Not like other girls. You heard me. You listen to me.”

“I want to be with you. And I said I loved you, but you…”

"What if I said I loved you? Huh? Those boys don't matter, a girl like you needs someone mature to match." He pecked her cheek. "I do love you."

Evie's resolve melted. He shut out the red lights. Burned her thorn covered vines. Words held power because we gave the syllables a charge.

And all Evie Fenny could put out into the world was lightning.

"You do?"

He smiled. Her prince. Braving so much to be with her. Wasn't that magical?

"How many boys have seen you like this?" Fredrick asked in a peculiar way. Charged.

Evie bit her lip. Couldn't look anymore. Didn't answer the question.

“I was scared of us.” He soothed now. “I should never have let you go. I’m always going to want the best for you, Evangeline. I hope you believe that. I’ll take care of you now, but you have to let me.”

Evie leaned in. Kissed him lightly. Wondered how Billy would have touched her in that motel room if they made it. How he'd feel in return.

"Will you let me?" Fredrick pressed. Wanting all the control she clawed to keep for herself in this skin and marrow. Devouring her without shame or remorse because he was older and knew best.

But, nice was better.

Evie had nothing. Head full of static. Body pulsing against her will. She wanted to scream. She wanted to eat more flower petals. A man loved her and she felt ugly and blaring. Out of control. No longer held to this world. Is that how it should feel?

“Okay."

His chest heaved like the sun might have just come out.

"Can we go to bed now?” She pecked his cheek. Felt his hands going under the robe to open it.

Wordlessly, Fredrick Bowers reached and turned the lamp off. The blaring in Evie's head never ended that night.

Darkness loomed to snuff out every star.

~~~~~~~

Next up, we learn how the rest of Billy's night went. It's been an odd week. Thanks for reading :) Feel free to chat. TAGGED::: @80sbxtch @nottherightseason @orxhidshavana @alagalaska @alongcamedolly

#billy hargrove #Billy hargrove x oc #Billy Hargrove imagine #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove fanfic #angel fenny #billy x angel #SOMY #writing #mine

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ironandsteel · 3 years ago

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𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙿𝙿𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙸𝙽𝙵𝙾𝚁𝙼𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 . please repost – don’t reblog, thank you ! answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog.

001 . what are you willing to write when it comes to shipping ?

honestly as long as we’re both down for whatever idea(s) we come up with, i’ll write anything.

002 . how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable ?

zoe’s in her 30s, so she’s a big girl and if your muse is too young or too old she’ll tell them. personally i won’t writ ships with any mun younger than 21.

003 . are you selective when shipping ?

I am. Chalk it up to bad experiences over the years, but I prefer to know who I’m shipping with and for us to talk about our muses together as opposed to just throwing them at each other and hoping things work out. Zoe isn’t easy to ship with but she��s not impossible. I’m willing to work on a relationship if you are.

004 . how far do steamy moments have to go before they are considered nsfw

if you wouldn’t do it in front of your mama, put it under a read more

005 . who are characters you ship your character with ?

i’m open to most ships if they make sense.

006 . does one have to ask to ship with you ?

I'd appreciate if you bring it up, but if it happens organically I’m fine with that too. That’s what good chemistry is all about.

007 . ship obsessed, or ship more-or-less ?

i like them. not obsessed though.

008 . are you multi-ship ?

yep

009 . what is your favourite ship in your fandom ?

i dont have a fandom

010 . finally, how does one ship with you ?

organically or by plotting/talking to me. the latter is preferred but i’ll definitely take the former.

#PSA.

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wandyrlust-a · 4 years ago

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MUSIC MEME - Casteel Da’Neer

rules: share five songs that represent your muse! repost, don’t reblog!

TRACK 001 // what have i done - dermot kennedy

Ever since the other night / I've been thinking 'bout the way you smile golden / Wanna move inside of your life / What have I done? / Oh no, what have I done? / You be brave for me, nowI never thought I needed saving / I was right where I should be / Good God, I know it's dangerous / But it's you that I need / I'm in love this time

TRACK 002 // emperor’s new clothes - panic! at the disco (LISTEN THIS IS THE ONE MUSE I’VE EVER SEEN WHERE THIS SONG IS LITERAL AND NOT A METAPHOR.)

Welcome to the end of eras / Ice has melted back to life / Done my time and served my sentence / Dress me up and watch me die / If it feels good, tastes good / It must be mine / Dynasty decapitated / You just might see a ghost tonight / And if you don't know now you know / I'm taking back the crown / I'm all dressed up and naked / I see what's mine and take it Heroes always get remembered / But you know legends never die

TRACK 003 // just the girl - the click five

She can't keep a secret / For more than an hour / She runs on 100 proof attitude power / And the more she ignores me / The more I adore her / What can I do? / I'd do anything for her' / cause she's bittersweet / She knocks me off of my feet / And I can't help myself / I don't want anyone else / She's a mystery / She's too much for me / But I keep comin' back for more / She's just the girl I'm lookin' for

TRACK 004 // lost - dermot kennedy

I could have told you 'bout the long nights / How no one loves the birds that don't rise / So you can tell the heroes go hide / My sense of wonder's just a little tired

TRACK 005 // bad things - rayland baxter

Hey there doctor, tell me what do you see? / Cause I got a bad disease and need of your remedy / And I've been aching from my head to my toes / I've been aching so much that I just don't ache no more / But there is a one thing that I need you to see / And you ain't never met a man sick as me

TAGGED BY : @gloriousxdarkness <3 TAGGING : @aercana, @starlitwields, @inkedmoonlight, @firebringr, @beliefruined

#headcanon ↠ casteel da'neer #marvelous? charming? undeniable? ↠ char ↠ casteel da’neer

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acioo · 5 years ago

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( PART THREE HERE ) & ( PART ONE HERE ) here are NINE MORE CHARACTER BASES ( label & background & personality ), all of whom i have played out in the past. they expand beyond ‘ the fuck boy ‘ and ‘ the arrogant rich kid ‘ because i think as a community we’re all tired of the cliche bull, so have some of my most fun & most subversive times. these are for inspiration purposes as well as admin purposes. if you are going to use these in an rph setting, i request credit, but otherwise, it’s not necessary. ( all details viable to change ; pinterest board links available for all of them - if you are interested in my characters, see my muse page ) TW : violence, alc, drugs, ( parental ) emotional neglect, death, blood, homelessness, police

001. THE WITCH — you are in the second generation of witchy women in your family. you’re not meant to misuse, you’re meant to give back, your mother tells you. nature loves you but nature holds grudges, your mother tells you. you are not you but we, your mother tells you. you will not heed her advice. age six, you learn how to make the tea boil in seconds just by whistling, even if you know that it’s not necessary. age ten, you make the kids who say bad words to you trip on their way up the stairs, leaving them with bloody noses and mouthfuls of curses. age sixteen, you fall in love with a girl who loves you like she’s going to lose you, who makes you forget why your parents crossed continents and why your blood sings a song of violence and why you stand unflinching in the eye of loss. you and your friends get into bad things when you start to get old enough for people to notice you. their eyes always go to you first. you and your dark eyes. you and the furrow in your brow. you and your lesson in awakening. you adopt another stray emotionally compromised teenager into your friend group and she tells you breathlessly, reverently that you’re the most beautiful person she’s ever seen. and it makes you mad, but maybe not at her, because you can recognize the good and bad people like a lie detector that’s seen too much and knows in details what a long night is because they’re all you have. you’re powerful in a way that they don’t seem to understand and maybe, you will take a lesson your mother. you’re powerful and you won’t let them see.

002. THE PROM QUEEN — the oldest by eleven minutes, you grow up trying to be everything your little siblings need. your parents are twisted but you learn to see them through rose-colored glasses instead of living in pain. when your siblings fall, you feel it, too, and when they cry, you cry too. it’s too much responsibility. your parents feed and clothe them, but you hold their mental health in your hands and the truth is you’re no better. you just got so good at hiding behind your mask that you can’t seem to tell the difference between you and party favor anymore, and the fact of the matter is that while they’re quiet and just so different in a way that your parents feared they would be, you blend in like a chameleon. you’re class president and prom royal. that’s the way it’s always been. but all the makeup in the world can’t hide the fact that you’re no better. the older you get, the more they can see. your grandmother, first. then your little sister’s best friend. your first love. everything you try to hide sits in your lap and you try to wrestle it into submission and sometimes it wins. they know you but you don’t. your eyes flash golden sometimes when you’re mad enough that you remember that you’re the one who put the burn stains on the wood floors of your family’s old penthouse, but you’re more human than anyone can ever even imagine.

003. THE UNAPOLOGETIC SLOTH — you’re the small-town preacher’s child who comes out with a slam when you turn ten years old. you’re burning your clothes in the basement when your mother comes home from book club. you’re looking for a way out, but all she wants to know is if you want to do it in the expensive fire pit outside instead. they call you their golden child but no one else shares the sentiment. you’re lucky that your group of friends ( they don’t look like you exactly or act like you exactly, but you all know what it’s like to feel like you’re alone in the world, or you did until you met them ) likes the way you bite back even if your grandmother doesn’t and neither does she come over for christmas dinner anymore and it tears you up inside until you bleed an angry and violent storm and trail curses ( against anyone, against god, if there is a god at all, if you even believe in a god at all ) down the creaky wood stairs from your room all the way into you mom’s lexus. you’ll come back but for now, you are a tempest and you are only beautiful when you’re burning. you’re not the type to bend yourself out of shape for people who won’t look back at you. you’re happy with yourself in a way that most people wish they could be, most people who spend nights drinking or turning in bed or smiling. you’re happy because you couldn’t care less.

004. THE PYROMANIAC — the child of two famous superheroes, you’re the picturesque image of your mother. you only have your father’s mutant blue eyes and you think that you’ll curse your mother with unhappiness for it until she gives up on you like you want her to. you hate her for her giving you everything you have. your powers, your hair, your two good hands. you love your father more than you love anything. it starts when you’re still little. lying about your powers, saying you have your fathers. your parents can’t stop it. the therapists certainly can’t stop it. not even your classmates' jeers can. the fires start in your teens around the time you start sneaking out at night. your mother with her kind eyes ( not yours, which are an icy and violent storm that everyone needs to seek cover from ) and tired crinkle in her forehead, who loves you even if the only time she gets your affection is at the request of your father, asks you about it and you don’t answer, look at her with contempt and a scoff. she knows the answer anyway. you’re the angriest kid she knows and they all wonder where you got it from as you project the worst pieces of your parents. your father's arrogance. your mother’s envy. by the time you turn eighteen, you’ve been arrested six times ( your party stories are to die for ; arson & assault & arson & underage drinking & arson & disorderly conduct ). you’re so hilarious, so famous, that they like to forget that you are also lethal.

005. THE PRINCELY POLYMATH — you don’t grow up as a person. the only child of one of the richest men the world may yet see, you come out of nowhere. bright hair and brighter eyes, you look and act nothing like your father. it takes you many years to find out that the only reason you’re surrounded by people is that they want something from you. the anxiety develops around the same time. coils into you and holds you tight. you cover it up poorly with anger and insult. it’s a bad look on you and it makes you bite your tongue hard enough to draw blood but it’s better than the alternative. you’re still going to get followed around. you’re still going to have callers. because you’re attractive and you’re devastating and you’re one of the brightest minds they’ve ever seen. you try not to let your father find out that under that mop of blonde curls lies a brain that can’t be matched, but he does when the maid returns from your room with empty vodka bottles and books on aeronautics and too-tiny baggies and sketches of architecture. your iq test makes the news, but you just wanted something of your own. your new school is just as fancy, but now you don’t have to hide the fact that you’re bored and unchallenged. when you’re fourteen, your starlet mother, who your father never forgave you for resembling, will overdose on pills in a bathroom in ibiza as you take the sats. you’re not allowed to be sad. you haven’t seen her since your fifth birthday. there’s nothing for you here. you wonder when there will be.

006. THE BEST OF THEM ALL — for as long as you can remember, you’ve been the nicest kid anyone has ever known. a candy-sweet smile and you really mean it, too. people marvel at the way you carry yourself and the hpw you can speak to people, but they’re always looking over your shoulder for your brighter, more reckless friends. you’re in the instagram posts but you’re no one’s first choice, and it’s okay because you’re used to it. you’re still going to be there when they fall down and cut themselves on the sharp edges of others that you told them with a wavering voice to watch out for. you keep a shovel in your trunk and your ringer on. because you’re that good. you won’t survive this kind of disregard but you think you’ve known this from the start. you’re not the protagonist in this story, but maybe you should be. people like to hear about warzones and long nights with longer bottles but the fact of the matter is that you’re not the kind of kid. you’re warm hands and a down looked smile. you won’t stand on the edge of the mountain but you’re happy to use your first aid kit to patch up anyone who does.

007. THE ACTIVIST — your mother never wants to be a mother and your father isn’t the kind of man she’d trust with her heart, let alone you with your chubby hands and big eyes. giving you up is the right thing to do. you run away from foster homes left and right. eventually, they stop looking for you, and you move from state to state, a rolling stone of your own. you find a person of your own. you call them your twin, but the facts don’t line up in a way you won’t realize for a very long time. eventually, you find your place with a microphone in hand and a shoebox under your feet. you care about everyone but yourself and you’re pretty okay with that. you’re a survivor, you always have been. when you’re fifteen, the peaceful protest you organized gets interrupted by local police who ask for a permit that’s not there. the noise ruptures your eardrum ; the crowd, the riot guns, the yelling. you never get back all your hearing but it won’t stop you. you’d never let that happen. you keep going, just different and with the help of friends. when you’re sixteen, you’re moving through a crowd, doc martens ahead of you when you stumble into a strong chest. an older man with a kind smile. when he offers to walk you home, asks if you’re parents know where you are this time of day, you laugh, but he’s serious. ( you’ve never met someone kind over the age of twenty. ) he adopts you in the spring and your platform is larger now, but you’re still the same old kid with fire in their heart and no chip on your straight shoulders. that’s the year you track down your biological mother. she’s apologetic and kind, but honest with you and you forgive her. she thought she was doing what was best for you and you think, despite the grim, and the scares, and the bad parts, that she did. you grow up, move from smartphones to tv screens to podcasts. you make a difference.

008. THE PSYCHIC’S DAUGHTER — you’re never going to be your sister, and eventually, you’ll be able to live with this fact. she’ll know of a father, a man who has dark hair and dark eyes and a dark heart, but you left him breathless and unhappy because he, like you, is a fighter. the worst person you know has your last name and your lips. your mother. she is what someone would call a powerful woman. she opens up a business of psychic women, trademarked under your last name, and you know it’s going to haunt you until the day you die. you know they have no power. you know they’re a trick of the light or a flick of a card or a bag of sequins. they teach you one thing. if you say anything with enough confidence, someone will believe you. you don’t know why you never say anything, but you don’t. you won’t. you will never reveal their secret. it’s not yours to tell. when you’re sixteen, following after your sister with big puppy dog eyes as she speaks gold and weaves silk with her steps, she will beat a girl half to death on the football field. she never tells you why and it seals the fate between you, but the truth is that you’d never be able to forgive yourself if she told you. ( she did it for you. the unloved child people whisper about under the bleachers. the psychic's youngest. you’ll curse them, they say. ) you are not your sister and you’re certainly not your mother. you’re dramatic, earnestly so, not with an outreached hand but with an open heart. and you may never recover from spending your days in the dark house at the end of the block, but it won’t hurt to try.

009. THE BACKGROUND CHARACTER — your small town chokes you from a young age. you grow up as one of the cool ones in that big squad of pretty, rich kids that everyone wants to be apart of, but you never asked for entry. your mother’s a bird who breathes down your neck, pecks at you for answers that she will never get because you’re too stunted, too angry to really be the child she’d always dreamed of having, and you find that kind of funny because you’re a lab baby that cost more than her car. you’ll try for her, but not for anyone else. they know that your ‘we’ll see‘s and your ‘maybe‘s are really just your fun way of saying you don’t want to hang out. you’ll try for her because she gave you everything you have ever had, but all they give you is migraines. too loud and too inconsiderate, you think. you’re a harsh judge on people, but they know what they bought into when they invested your sour apple self. you watch from the windows and that’s how you’ve always liked it. you’re safe there. they can’t hurt you. you’ll sleep with one every other month, or attend a party or two, but you’re too fast and too much of a whim for them to even know you before you’re gone.

#rph #rpt #rpc #rpa #resources #masterlist #admin help #writing #mine: char bases

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goodmcn · 5 years ago

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* 𝖇𝖎𝖌𝖌𝖊𝖘𝖙 𝖌𝖗𝖊𝖊𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 to all u skinnie legends out there who i am BURSTING at the seams to write w ! i’m 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑛 , i go by 𝑠ℎ𝑒 / 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 pronouns and am full of excitement to get some kickin plots started w my lil charmer son , 𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒉𝒊 ! he’s a relatively new muse i’m trying out so forgive any of the kinks i’m workin out ! unless u like that shit which in that case u go boo and i love u . all likes will result in me comin to u for plots so make sure to love that 𝐥𝐢𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 down ! without further ado , here comes ur new resident boyband bf with dimples n commitment issues ! :~) :~) :~)

𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 here and do i have the tea for you . 𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒉𝒊 is back on campus , which is surprising considering the threatening note i left them . yes , i know all about 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 because of their 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝 . imagine the tabloids and how the 𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒎𝒂𝒏 family would feel for such information to come out , not to mention the reputation of 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐦𝐚 because of their actions . at this rate , 𝒉𝒆 is better off staying put in 𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐮 , 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐚 and living off that $966 m family net worth . what’s the point in studying 𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 with plans to 𝑪𝑳𝑬𝑨𝑵 𝑼𝑷 𝑯𝑰𝑺 𝑨𝑪𝑻 𝑻𝑶 𝑩𝑬 𝑻𝑨𝑲𝑬𝑵 𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑰𝑶𝑼𝑺𝑳𝒀 𝑨𝑺 𝑨𝑵 𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑶𝑹 , is it worth it with what i know ? anyways , they may want to continue to be 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 & 𝒎𝒂𝒈𝒏𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒄 because the 𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒆𝒕𝒖𝒐𝒖𝒔 & 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒄𝒖𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕 attributes make me want to spill . ( 𝑤𝑜𝑙𝑓𝑔𝑎𝑛𝑔 𝑛𝑜𝑣𝑜𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑧 , 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑛 , 𝑝𝑠𝑡 ) .

* TRIGGER WARNING : drug mention , death mention

⋆ ╰ 𝑺 𝑻 𝑨 𝑻 𝑰 𝑺 𝑻 𝑰 𝑪 𝑺 .

𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 : bodhi alexander goodman 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 : bo , b 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆 / 𝒂𝒈𝒆 : june 6 , twenty - one 𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄 : gemini 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚 / 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔 : cismale identifying with he / him / his pronouns 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 : to be determined ! 𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 : student at hworth majoring in anthropology and minoring in performing arts , member of ( undetermined vc / name but their artist - claim is PRETTYMUCH ! 🥴 ) , aspiring actor 𝒉𝒐𝒈𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆 : gryffindor 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 : jake peralta from b99 , finn hudson from glee , jim halpert from the office , han solo from star wars , sonny carisi from law and order svu , prince naveen from the princess and the frog

𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒔 : - impetuous , remiss , hedonistic , defiant , mercurial , afraid of commitment , truculent

+ benevolent , jovial , responsive , imaginative , assiduous , steadfast , sharp-witted , enthusiastic , magnetic , sympathetic

⋆ ╰ 𝑨 𝑵 𝑻 𝑬 𝑪 𝑬 𝑫 𝑬 𝑵 𝑻 .

001 : bodhi came into his family as the result of a closed adoption . he doesn’t know much about his birth family besides the few pictures his parents have shown him but he’s been told little to nothing about his roots besides the fact that his birth mother is also jewish . it’s not that his parents want him to remain in the dark about his past , it’s that they want to give him the choice to pick and choose what facets of it he discovers himself , and so far , bodhi’s been content living the life he knows : two loving parents who picked him of all people to add to their family .

002 : his mother , martha goodman , runs a foundation to empower women in leadership positions and makes a fortune running workshops and speaking tours . his father is the tv mogul of america . eric goodman has his own TV empire and runs shows such as the bachelor franchise , ER , will and grace , veronica mars , shameless , etc ( basically warner bros television productions . ) he grew up needing nothing , learning everything , exploring the world of the rich and famous with hollywood’s darling power couple keeping him grounded and putting a good head on his shoulders . while most in their tax bracket filled the expectation of the snotty rich families , the goodman’s seemed to have an ascriptive surname , building a reputation of themselves for being kind , self-made people who maintained humility and their good natures throughout their rises to fame .

003 : with a family reputation for being generally decent human beings , bodhi’s sparkling personality and kind disposition showed no deviation from this behavior , and he quickly charmed his way through every hollywood party or charity fundraiser his parents let him tag along to . there’s no expectation from martha or eric for him to be anything other than a good person , allowing bodhi to develop at his own pace and for that , he’s able to flaunt a relationship of mutual respect and absolute adoration of both his parents to this day ( a notably rarer and rarer thing in the circles he graces , it’d seem . )

003 : he’s well-liked throughout school , doing well enough in the sports he dabbles in to have a potential future in them , but it’s nothing that speaks to him the way the arts do . his teachers note his bright , inquisitive nature , the way he watches and recreates movements and noises with almost frightening precision , the tenacity and the desire for absolute perfection . it’s shocking , really , when his parents see his grades tanking around the same time he’s leaving middle school . they’ve given him what he wants , after all , without losing the perspective of discipline they mutually agreed upon . the private schools should be enough to keep him in line , but as it turns out , it’s nothing of their own intentional doing that leaves bodhi’s gpa with much to be desired . tired of his legacy being attached to his surname , he finds himself attracted to the way he makes people smile : at first , it’s the way he performs on a stage that gives him the approval he so craves , eventually , it’s the adrenaline that comes from intentional disobedience that starts to drive him .

004 : the headmaster of the ritzy high school he attends hesitates to label him a ‘ problem child ‘ — after all , bodhi’s well-liked among his instructors , has a thriving social life , and is actively involved in extracurriculars up to his ears . ‘ he’s not a bad kid , ‘ the headmaster explains to the concerned goodman’s , seated tensely in his office for a behavioral intervention meeting , ‘ he just makes some really , really bad decisions . ‘ and that’s to say the least , he notes : the list of his infractions include everything from harmless pranks and showing up to class hungover to provoking other students and being caught with illegal substances . they don’t condone such behavior , of course , but the school would never consider rejecting the decent sum his parents offer to scrub his academic record of such infractions .

005 : unwittingly , they fuel bodhi’s chaos . knowing he can get away with more and more than he ever considered possible , he carries on following whatever feels good or seems like it’ll fill his time . he hates sitting still and loves making other people feel good , a dangerous combination when fueled with the nearly 1 billion dollar empire his parents have at his fingertips . he’s saved only by his own charm and his family’s heft , getting out of dui’s and public intoxication charges without too much more than a salacious headline ( something he grows used to enough to remain unbothered by . ) it’s when he’s 17 and receives an offer from his first manager to join a group that he gets out of the rigidity of school that seemed to have been holding him back . it’s him and 4 other boys his age , meant to be something of nsync revamped , utilizing his musical inclination and dance talents to shoot him into the tabloids for reasons other than something that would scandalize his parents , for once . the group is playful and fun , and their fan demographic is mostly girls his age , so he’s more than pleased to finish school on the road during their first small scale tour through the US .

006 : while this gives him a new outlet for his energy , bodhi still finds himself in the occasional sticky situation with the law , much to his parents and now his team’s exasperation . his parents force him to enroll at hu as some sort of hope he’ll learn discipline , balancing his career and his studies , and for a while it works . recording during the school year and touring every other summer , bodhi strikes a balance that gives him some sort of fulfillment for a short amount of time — that is , until his mercurial side kicks into gear and combines with his natural hedonistic tendencies to cause one of the lowest of lows in his life . he’s halfway through his sophomore year when he feels a change of heart , losing passion for the now - boyish tendencies he’s become so comfortable with in his life , longing for something where he’ll be taken more seriously . he wants to impress , to blow people away , to make them feel , and while music has been there for him his whole life , he can’t help but think maybe he’s been meant for a stage or a camera and that’s what’s left him so empty . the prospect of having to tell his family and group he wants to throw it all away to pursue something he has no experience in agonizes him , pushing his nerves to the point he reverts to old habits trying to soothe them . he’s partying harder than he has in years with his close circle , much to the chagrin of a childhood friend who’s trying to talk him out of being reckless . he claims to remember none of the details of the night , but the memory of handing his best friend the first line of coke for the night and watching something go very , very wrong before bodhi’s able to follow suit is forever engrained in his memory . fucked up , terrified , and forever afraid of the very real responsibilities he’s faced with , he turns and hightails it out of the party . the police raid it a half hour later , and his friend’s death is ruled an accidental overdose on laced coke .

007 : bodhi doesn’t tell a soul about how he left his friend behind , about how he could have done something if he wasn’t such a fucking coward afraid of stepping up , and feels the loss deep inside himself every day moving forward . he ignores it by pushing his fun-loving disposition even further , trying to temper it with a push to be taken more seriously as an artist in order to make his transition into acting . he’s had small theater roles here and there and does a student film or two , but it’s nothing close to what he wants of himself . after all , hollywood wants a leading man , which bodhi has the absolute capability of being — if he weren’t so busy letting himself be consumed by his peter pan syndrome . he wants it all , to be taken seriously , but is unwilling to let go of the habits that keep him lodged in immaturity . always one to run from his problems , holling’s threats are now forcing him to face the reality of the consequences he’s tried so long to ignore . with his career , his family name , and his own future at risk , he’s being forced to recognize that good intentions aren’t always enough to keep him in one piece .

⋆ ╰ 𝑨 𝑵 𝑨 𝑳 𝒀 𝑺 𝑰 𝑺 .

001 : bodhi’s been something of a golden boy as long as he can remember , or at least some version of it despite his propensity for mischief . boy-ish , charming , with a heart perhaps too big for his body and seemingly allergic to anything remotely resembling responsibility . he’s a natural born leader when the event suits him — passionate and able to use his magnetism for bringing people together , but when he feels unmotivated , he’s about as helpful as he is good with his schoolwork ( which is to say : leaving something to be desired . ) despite this , he’s an outspoken advocate for good and through his jokes and headassery , will push for a message of benevolence and good energy .

002 : his bright , playful disposition makes him naturally magnetic . he’s a man’s man through and through but has a sensitivity engrained by his parents that lead him to respect all life , no matter the perceived or stereotyped value . despite his traditional ‘ bro ‘ demeanor , he’s quite respectful and his brash nature tends to avoid all objectifying or unbecoming commentary . with a devilish grin and an unparalleled enthusiasm for life , bodhi’s kind nature doesn’t seem so much of a pushover as someone who really just makes those around him feel alive . he has an air of self - assured confidence and mellow security , partnered with his belief that everyone has a value as a person and his kind , unrelenting eye contact , has the effect of bodhi making you feel like you’re the most important person in the room , solely by the way he pays attention to you . this is part of his passion , making others feel uplifted and important .

003 : his upbringing , despite not perfect , leaves him with a moral compass pointing a little straighter than what he’s found in some of the circles he frequents . despite a usually easygoing and breezy disposition , bodhi’s disdain for the egocentric or high - brow mindsets of his classmates often leaves them as the butt end of his jokes . he knows there’s no point in calling them out , so instead he takes a jim halpert - ian approach to their demeanors by pressing every single button made available to him . he gets an absolute KICK out of this and while he tries to leave the lady societies out of the equation of his teasing , many of his snotty sigma brothers have expressed quite the frustration with their wildcard member’s tendency to cause issues within their ranks solely for his own entertainment .

004 : despite having all the makings of a true leading man , it’s bodhi’s selectiveness with his efforts and fear of all things responsibility that leave him in neverland , a perpetual peter pan syndrome following someone who desperately wants to be taken seriously despite doing nothing to make himself more serious , thus his flaw of greed — he wants it all , but wants it given to him rather than work for it himself . he’s naturally playful , almost to a fault , using humor as a coping mechanism for his discomfort at some less than opportune times . having a heart as big as his leads to a level of sensitivity that sometimes teeters on being too much rather than too little — he’ll percieve slights that aren’t there , or take liberties with past conflicts as excuses to cause new conflicts of his own . he’s a perfectionist at heart , which leads to his tendencies to be all or nothing : he either will go after something with every intention of being the best , or will refuse to try at all . his inner confidence leads to an occasional miscalculation , biting off more than he can chew and leaving those around him to clean up after his mess despite his best efforts . he’s dedicated to certain people and causes but is otherwise unreliable , with a naturally fickle disposition that leads to some uncertainty as to whether he will really follow through or not unless it has to do with something or someone he’s expressed loyalty to in the past .

005 : LIKES TO FUCKIN MOVE ! he cannot fuckin sit STILL and u’ll always catch him bouncing his leg or wigging lmao he hates sitting down . sports were awesome for him but he THRIVED when he learned how to dance n honestly that’s one of his most notable talents . he fucking looooves to move , and lots of how he emotes comes from his body language bc he knows how important it is to be expressive in more than jsut your face , esp w acting . he’s left handed , LOVES animals , and feels most himself when he’s making someone else smile . he’s prone to random outbursts of musical inclination and is the one in his friend groups that often receives a ‘ bodhi SHUT UP ‘ because he’s trying to harmonize with the radio DFSDFSD . he’s more than willing to share his ecclectic collection of scars and scratches from the countless bad decisions he’s made , and has been a frequent star of barstool’s social media for some of his less - than - professional antics . there’s a running hashtag on twitter to make him the next bachelor but he can’t stay out of jail long enough for his dad to give him the green light KSFDJSDF

⋆ ╰ 𝐂 𝐎 𝐍 𝐍 𝐄 𝐂 𝐓 𝐈 𝐎 𝐍 𝐒 .

001 : exes - who doesn’t like a good exes plot :/ good terms , bad terms , on and off , whateva . give me someone he said ‘ i love you ‘ to in 24 hours , give me someone he dated for 6 months and never said it once , give me someone who he ghosted , someone who ghosted him , truly ANYTHING i am down to talk abt

002 : good influences - bodhi needs some ppl to help keep him in CHECK the mans can be a lil wild sometimes . im thinking 1 or 2 ppl who kinda work as his voice of reason when he can’t think straight n wants to dive off the roof into the pool to say ‘ bodhi no ! ‘

003 : bad influences - he’s a p good guy so i’d LOVE for some muses to bring out the worst in him

004 : hookups - he respects women by providing them w fire ass hookups n then never talking to them again KSDFKJSDHF im kidding , but fr he’s down . give me ongoing , former and ended badly , one night stand , all the TEA

005 : inner circle - i’m always a sucker for a good bro squad ( bro is forever and always gender neutral btw )

006 : party friends - this is self explanatory y’all !

007 : childhood friends from malibu / so cal area - he basically hasn’t grown up in like 12 yrs besides getting taller n buffer give me some childhood friends , a first love , former neighbors , even a mf pen pal ?

008 : friends w lingering feelings / skinny luvs - any of these in ANY extent would be desired and adored 😔✊🏼

009 : enemies / ppl who don’t like him / he doesn’t fw dfsfsd - bodhi’s pretty social but he kinda has this thing against rlly snotty rich kids so pls give me some high brow muses that he doesn’t get along w ! and makes his life’s effort to annoy n cause trouble w !

010 : fans ? - he’s in a boyband .. . . .. tbh it’s not the least likely thing in the world for him to have a stan or two at hu ? prettymuch n former 1D stans come thru DJFSJDHFKSJ

#holling:intro #im so tired of typing im sorry for this mess :/ SDFSDF #⎝ * 𝒃 . 𝒈 . › ooc .

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fmdminaharchive · 5 years ago

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005: 30 days of character development idol edition part 2 (day eleven through twenty)

wordcount: 1,342 (with questions)

+ day eleven: has your muse had any scandals? how have these scandals affected your muse as an idol or as a person? if your muse has not had any scandals, talk about their views on scandals. is all publicity good publicity?

minah has, luckily for her, never had any real scandals. in part that is because truly, minah is rather boring and she doesn’t get up to a whole lot of things that are very scandal worthy like drinking or smoking or anything of the likes. on the other hand it’s also because minah is a very careful person when it comes to matters like dating, making sure that if she gets involved with someone it’s hard the media gets air of it.

+ day twelve: if your muse is in a group, what are the fun things about promoting with other members? what do they love about being in a group? what do they love about their members? if your muse is a solo artist, what are their thoughts on promoting alone? what do they love about being solo?

minah is a real family person, she loves having people around her at all time and is a firm believer of the fact that lipstick is a sisterhood, even if some of the members would disagree. she loves to take care of people and be there for them, which combined with her age making her more or less the mother of the group when it comes to lipstick. what’s most important to her is just having people by her side to share her experiences and feelings with and in lipstick, she’s definitely found that.

+ day thirteen: for the muses in a group, what are the challenges of being one of several people in a group? have there been any troubles that have come along with being in a group environment and times they wish they were alone? for the solo artist muses, have you ever felt lonely promoting alone? do you ever wish that you were in a group instead?

minah doesn’t really struggle with all that comes with being part of a group. back when lipstick was still living together their dorm was probably more spacious than her family’s apartment back in busan had been with the same amount of people. even though lipstick is slowly getting on the older side for a girl group, minah wants to hear nothing about disbandment, she’s proud to see the girls all go their own ways and explore solo activities but at the end of the day, she's relieved when it’s all of them together on stage again.

+ day fourteen: if your muse is in a group, how do you think they would have fared had they had a solo career instead? what kind of concept would they have? if your muse is a solo artist, how do you think they would have fared if they were in an idol group? what position of the group do you think they would have?

back when minah first debuted in 2012, she would definitely not have made much of a good soloist. these days whatsoever, minah feels a little more confident about standing on stage by herself, both due to all the extra experience and the fact that she has her priorities much more in order than she did as a trainee. as a solo-artist, minah would definitely lean much more towards a ballad sound, little to no choreography to allow focus on her voice and her voice only. with a concept to suit it of course, soft, classy, mature, fluctuating with the emotions of the songs she’d release.

+ day fifteen: who does your muse look up to in the industry? why do they look up to this person?

minah looks up to lyna a great deal. it helps of course, that they’re good friends, but that’s not the reason, not entirely. for starters, lyna is one of the strongest yet kindest people minah knows, two traits she admires a great deal. apart from that, lyna is also one of the most powerful, most skilled vocalists minah knows and it’s no secret that minah is a sucker for good vocals. all in all, lyna is the total package and minah couldn’t adore her more for it.

+ day sixteen: if your muse could do a special stage with another artist or idol group, who would it be and why? what song would they perform?

minah would love to do a duet with knight’s duri one day. again, minah is a sucker for good vocals, and duri is undoubtedly one of the best vocalists out there. he’s known for his ballad-style, a genre minah’s voice gives for as well so she’d love to sing a ballad with him. as for a specific song maybe the descendants of the sun ost ‘every time’.

+ day seventeen: how would your muse fare in a variety show? if your muse could appear on any variety show, which variety would it be and why? if you don’t have a lot of knowledge of variety shows, talk about what kind of variety show they would go on.

minah is decent at variety, no true variety star but definitely not bad at it either. with her warm and friendly personality, she definitely knows how to capture the hearts of fans even if her spontaneity is lacking and she’s prone to put herself in the background of larger groups. her ideal variety show would most definitely include children. not only does minah love to interact with little kids, she’s really good at it as well, definitely, a skill learned in the years she spent helping raise her younger siblings. she would love to do something like ‘little forest’, just a heartwarming, wholesome program centered around taking care of children and letting them have fun.

+ day eighteen: what entertainment agency is your muse a part of? what do they think of other groups and artists that are in the same agency as them? which labelmates do they get along with the most, excluding group members?

bc entertainment represent! even though minah isn’t particularly fond of management themselves (truly, who is?) she does have fond feelings towards her labelmates, well, most of them, but those who she has bad experiences with are a personal matter, she’d never let that reflect on how she feels about their groups. the group’s she’s closest with are probably bee and knight, something that’s not that hard to fathom as bee are their female seniors and minah briefly trained with the girls before their debut and knight being their brother group, debuting in the same year.

+ day nineteen: is there anything besides idol activities that your muse would want to do? would they want to take their hand at hosting a variety show or act in a television show or drama? would they want to try out modeling or a musical? if they have done things such as these, talk about their thoughts toward these things.

if there is one thing minah really hopes to try one day, it’s starring in a musical. it’s just something minah is really drawn too and a big step for both her singing and her acting, a combination she’d love to give her hand at. who knows, maybe one day.

+ day twenty: if your muse was able to be a part of a supergroup that comprised of current idols, who would they want to be in the same group and why? what kind of concept would this group have? how do you think the group would do in terms of popularity?

if minah were to create a so-called supergroup, she’d probably keep the focus on her generation of idols: groups like bee, lipstick, gal.actic, silhouette, aria, and female soloists. if she had to name names it’d probably be herself, bee’s bom, silhouette’s dita and soloists areum and lyna. coincidentally, that’s five powerful vocalists, which perfectly lines up with spica. you don’t love me as their debut song perhaps?

#*:･ﾟ♔– «taste of a cherry pop» // headcanons.#//when will i shut up about minah performing spica's you dont love me i hear u asking #//the answer is never absolutely never

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acefms · 1 year ago

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MUSE PLAYLIST / SOFIA ACOSTA

banner credit.

001. uptown girl / billy joel

uptown girl, she’s been living in her uptown world. i bet she's never had a backstreet guy, i bet her momma never told her why.

002. dollhouse / melanie martinez

places, places, get in your places. throw on your dress and put on your doll faces. everyone thinks that we're perfect, please don't let them look through the curtains. picture, picture, smile for the picture, pose with your brother, won't you be a good sister?

003. homecoming queen? kelsea ballerini

hey homecoming queen, how's things at home? still walking on eggshells when that curtain's closed? did your daddy teach you how to be tough? or more like your mama, sweep it under the rug?

004. numb / linkin park

can't you see that you're smothering me, holding too tightly, afraid to lose control? ‘cause everything that you thought I would be has fallen apart right in front of you. every step that I take is another mistake to you, and every second I waste is more than I can take. I’ve become so numb.

005. if it makes you happy / sheryl crow

if it makes you happy, it can’t be that bad. if it makes you happy, then why the hell are you so sad?

006. hopelessly devoted to you / grease

I’m out of my head, hopelessly devoted to you.

007. goodbye to you / michelle branch

I've been searchin' deep down in my soul, words that I'm hearin' are starting to get old. It feels like I'm startin' all over again, the last three years were just pretend. and I said goodbye to you, goodbye to everything that I knew. you were the one I loved, the one thing that I tried to hold on to.

008. the night we met / lord huron

I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you, take me back to the night we met. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, haunted by the ghost of you. take me back to the night we met.

009. it’ll be okay / shawn mendes

I start to imagine a world where we don't collide. it’s making me sick, but we'll heal and the sun will rise. If you tell me you're leaving, I'll make it easy, It'll be okay. If we can't stop the bleeding, we don't have to fix it, we don't have to stay. I will love you either way.

010. broken & beautiful / kelly clarkson

I’m broken and it’s beautiful.

#chq;task #hc | sofia.#muse | sofia.

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ivoryxbones-blog · 6 years ago

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THE DOLLHOUSE SERIES; 001

playing with a dollhouse was not an idea she had originally wanted to entertain. in fact, it had belonged to marian. but what good was it now to a dead girl? her mother had spent a pretty penny on the identical miniature replica of the victorian styled home. pushing it down amma's throat every chance she got, until eventually it had become a staple inside of her bedroom. playing with the dollhouse quickly turned into a game. a slow, lingering, deadly game. she sure as hell was not about to be the only person trapped inside. and seeing that ann nash loved spending all of her time at the residence, amma decided to grant her a permanent place of residency. she had left enough space near the miniature king sized bed to insert the first tooth. after all, ivory floors were a common theme that ran in the family.

#( 018. the dollhouse series )#tw: mentions of murder #tw: mentions of death #( 005. good girls do bad things / musings )

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amicizics · 5 years ago

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jay / sunsct’s first of many ship playlists : learning to die ( a ghost verse playlist for tiny / @othcrness)

this was almost too easy for me to make. i love every single one of our babies and just found myself thinking about what it would be like to compile the good, bad, and ugly of life as a ghost. i think i’ve successfully done that with this. (or at least i hope... it’s a whopping twenty-nine songs long!) duration: 1 hr 49 m / listen here. explanations under read more.

001. ‘R.I.P 2 my youth’ - the neighbourhood: it’s all about death and losing yourself. what better way to start than this? the push and pull between escaping death and anticipating it all the while. many of our muses can relate. “put me in the dirt, let me be with the stars.”

002. ‘angel’ - the weeknd: chosen mostly for the song title but the eighties vibes of the song remind me of phaedra.

003. ‘when you’re smiling’ - louis armstrong: an antonio centric song. this song is telling of the kind of music antonio listened to later in his life.

004. ‘liability’ - lorde: centers around the way the women in this group feel. at one point or another, they’d been made to feel useless and worthless (mostly by men). this song is about those feelings of helplessness and loneliness. “you’re all going to watch me disappear into the sun.”

005. ‘you’d be surprised’ - eddie cantor: antonio centric. an upbeat song of the 1920s that i think is kind of comical for someone like tonio to listen to. later half of the song reminds me of vincent as well. “he’s got the face of an angel but he’s got the devil in his eyes.”

006. ‘shallow’ - bradley cooper & lady gaga: vince and vivian centric. mostly because i couldn’t do without letting vivian’s voice be heard in this playlist. also, i think ‘in the shallow’ is exactly how a lot of the ghosts feel being trapped in this in-between stage.

007. ‘Записка’ - klavdiya shulzhenko: inessa centric. with extensive research done on russian music in the thirties and forties, i figured someone who pushed the envelope like inessa would probably listen to russian women sing rather than men.

008. ‘kiss of fire’ - georgia gibbs: alexei centric. one of the reasons why i chose this song was for its intense sounds but upon research, i also discovered that the artist was the child of russian immigrants so even though this wouldn’t have been common knowledge, i couldn’t help myself.

009. ‘do i wanna know?’ - arctic monkeys: david centric. modern as fuck but this is beat and some of the lyrics remind me of nothing but david. “have you no idea that you’re in deep? i’ve dreamt about you nearly every night this week.”

010. ‘jailhouse rock’ - elvis presley: vincent centric. being that this was a song in the 50′s i think it’d be the perfect look into vince in his youth and what kind of music he was inspired by. (he won’t tell you but he wanted to be a smooth lady killer like elvis.)

011. ‘ghost town’ - adam lambert: also chosen for the title but also an upbeat take on this otherwise dead playlist. (pun intended)

012. ‘what’d i say pt. 1′ - ray charles: alexei centric. i think he’d listen to sultry iconic beats like this. also it’s ray charles so i couldn’t resist.

013. ‘i’ve got you under my skin’ - frank sinatra: david centric. david is a fancy boy and therefore, this is the kind of song you’d catch him dancing to. i also think the title is clever as fuck (hellooo?? killer!!!)

014. ‘ghost’ - sky ferreira: chosen for the title. i love this song and the soft guitar.

015. ‘raindrops (an angel cried)’ - ariana grande: an interlude of sorts for me. strangely befitting of the kind of theme i’m going for.

016. ‘i can’t get no satisfaction’ - the rolling stones: vincent centric. sixties, vince is suddenly into rock and wants to be cool.

017. ‘these boots are made for walkin’ - nancy sinatra: frances centric. the kind of music she would have listened to in her teens. songs like this heavily shaped the path that ended in her demise.

018. ‘young and beautiful’ - lana del rey: antonio & inessa centric. this version was made for the great gatsby so some of the sounds are very twenties which i like. i also think that it’s very telling of their love.

019. ‘another one bites the dust’ - queen: phaedra centric. a quick jump into the eighties to liven things up. you mentioned phaedra’s love of rock when she was alive so i thought i’d pay homage to that with such a timeless jam.

020. ‘fear and loathing’ - marina and the diamonds: mallory centric. just thought i’d throw one song in there which i think captures the scary creepy vibes associated with ghosts. could pretty much apply to everyone involved which i also like.

021. ‘angel of the morning’ - merrilee rush: francesca centric. this came right as francesca died and i think it’s a song that reveals that softer side of her. beyond being the radical feminist of her time, francesca really only craved what everyone else loved even if just temporary.

022. ‘sign of the times’ - harry styles: i simply couldn’t go without adding this song because the lyrics just really remind me of our babies. “you can’t bribe the door on your way to the sky. you look pretty good down here, but you ain’t really good.”

023. ‘a million years ago’ - adele: i think this also works perfectly for the vibes i’m trying to go for. this song just really reminds me of the struggles with being stuck. “i miss the air, i miss my friends. i miss my mother i miss it when life was a party to be thrown but that was a million years ago.”

024. ‘angel’ - madonna: chosen with phaedra in mind but i think is also the perfect happy telling of the honeymoon phase some of these ghosties will be going through when they first meet / fall for each other which i think is a lighter outlook on everything they’ve gone through.

025. ‘young god’ - halsey: francesca & alexei centric. not only do the vibes fit perfectly for this playlist but i also think the lyrics really remind me of what it’s like for frances to be with lex romantically. also these lyrics? lex. “he says ‘oh baby girl don’t cut on my edges. i’m the king of everything and oh, my tongue is a weapon. there's a light in the crack that's separating your thighs and if you wanna go to heaven you should fuck me tonight"

026. ‘lust for life’ - lana del rey & the weeknd: just a really pretty song that i think encompasses ghost vibes even though it’s mainly about wanting to live. i think once everyone meets their match, they’ll want nothing more than to continue basking in this in-between space that they’re in.

027. ‘ghostin”- ariana grande: chosen mostly for the title but it’s also about moving on after the death of a loved one so i thought it was fitting. “he just comes to visit me when i’m dreaming every now and then.”

028. ‘autumn leaves’ - ed sheeran: another heartwrenching song about death. always makes me cry but a necessary component to build up to the next song.

029. ‘heaven is a place on earth’ - belinda carlisle: another 80s jam! wrapping up this playlist with a happy bow a la tiny.

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ariagrans · 6 years ago

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Let the year ahead be the one where all your dreams come true and your wishes be granted. 🖤 @hwlandhqgossip

001. What is your proudest accomplishment of this year?

There’s so many that’s happened throughout the year, especially including my album, but most of all, I think it’s best to face the hardest parts of your year so you can take a step back and admire how you overcame them, and I feel as though I found the ability to handle it all, which makes me rather proud of myself given the circumstances. There’s still a scary amount of bad in the world, but I’d like to think I was able to bring some good to a lot of people with my own strength, and hopefully they all found their own.

002. What is the biggest life lesson you learned this year?

It’s something I’ve always known, but I feel as though this year truly made me appreciate the process of living. That lesson of it being that each diamond is created under extreme pressure, and so when I find myself stressed and entirely overwhelmed through a situation, I know that I can trust the process that something good is going to come out of that. If a diamond can do it, so can I.

003. What is one relationship (can be friendship) that has helped you survive this year?

I don’t know what I would do without, Bella. She’s such a blessing that I’ve been spending so much time with, and I’m going to miss her so bad when I’m across the pond, but even if I have to buy the tickets myself, I know I’ll need to get her ass over there with me for our rightful visitations. Bella’s the type of person that could pull me out of a bad mood within seconds, and all I can hope for is to be the same for her. She’s made 2018 exciting at every turn, and there’s so much in store for our friendship, I’m calling it now. @b-hxdid

004. Who or what do you need to let go of in order to make next year even better than this year?

My anxiety. If I could let that go, I know 2019 could be the best year of my life. I’ve had it consume me plenty this year, stayed days to myself and not talk to anybody, a fear eating away inside. And you know what? I regret feeling it every time. I know there’s no reason to feel it. I know it’s a mentality that I’m harboring, one that I know I can expel from my life if I put my mind to it. It creates an insecurity that I won’t allow to hold me back any longer.

005. What did you do this year that you’ve never done before?

I got myself a pig! Not as inspirational as I should probably mention, but I did get one, and my god, it’s definitely a job to handle, but she’s such a light to my life. Shout out to my baby, Piggy Smalls.

006. What are three resolutions or goals you want to make happen next year?

To just stay happy, to spread that happiness to others, and to keep my head up, brush off my shoulders, and let everything flow like water off a duck’s back. Here’s to happiness and to nobody keeping me away from that.

007. Where did most of your money go this year?

I might have gotten carried away with the Christmas presents this year, I’m not gonna lie, but I couldn’t stop myself. They all deserved what they got, and hopefully next year I’ll get to bond with even more people so they all get a piece of my heart as well. And wallet, but I think heart sounds sweeter.

008. What song will always remind you of this year?

Is it weird to shout out my own song? Because Thank You, Next isn’t just about the relationships. I didn’t write it just so I can call out what I’ve been through with the guys I’ve mentioned, or make a diss, and plenty of people already know that. It’s a constant reminder to myself that all I need is myself to get through this crazy place we call earth. It reminds me that I can move on from anything, that I don’t have to hold anything in or bottle it up, that I can look forward and say next to a new situation. A better situation. Nothing can hold me back now from being the person I want to be, and do what I want to do, and that song was written to express that, so I find it to be the perfect fit for 2018.

009. How will you be spending the last day of this year?

Packing up! Aside from celebrating, of course, I’ve still got a big move to make on my hands, and 2019 is the year of the UK for me, and I’ve never been more ready.

010. Who is the best new person you’ve met this year?

Lily James has forever changed my life for the best because she is the best. No, she’s the greatest. Words don’t even begin to describe what Lily means to me, and it’s an absolute honor to have her in my life, to get to spend more time with her. Have you ever met someone that could make you smile just from seeing them smile? Or someone that their happiness radiates so hard onto your life that you can’t feel anything but happy when you’re around them? That’s how Lily makes me feel, and she’s someone that I’m most ready to spend the next year with and learn more about. @lllyjames

OOC

001. What relationship (can be friendship) has been the most fun to write for your muse/s this year?

I’ve gotten so into Ariana and Grant’s friendship to the point that I made a manip for them a month before I could even post it, like what even.. And it’s all based off the love of sushi together and plotting out the families they’ll each have. I know the end of this year has been stressful in real life that I haven’t gotten to devote as much time as I want, but best believe that I want more of them in 2019. <3 @theflashgrant Also, I love you, Sam. I hope you’re not alarmed by the time this is posted, I have tomorrow off. x

002. In what ways do you connect to your muse/s?

I like to think that I connect to how happy Ariana feels most of the time.. Well, she’s constantly been happy, and ever since I’ve come here, I feel like I’ve had a brighter look on the year compared to the rest, and her time she’s had here has affected my own time and made it even better.

003. What’s your favorite category to write for your muse/s? (angst, fluff, smut, etc.)

Well, I haven’t written smut on Ariana yet, but I’m sure that’ll be a wonderful time when we get down to it with her and whoever the lucky boy/girl she’s with is, but so far, these fluffy, cute ass friendships she’s making is hands down the best for me.

004. If you could give your muse/s one gift, what would you give them?

I’d have to give my muse more time, honestly. They deserve it. I shouldn’t let work consume my life, when my passion is RP in the first place. RP is my escape, and I’m here along with many talented people that I want to share my muse with, so just devoting more to them is the most I could do to benefit them, honestly.

005. What was your favorite event/moment/memory in HollywoodlandHQ this year?

Appreciation week! I was honestly only here for like.. two to three weeks, I think? And I like to think I went in on trying to express how appreciative I was to be here, and I still am. I always will be! You guys are the best, and it’s an honor to spend time with you. It’s an honor to be in a group ran by such talented and trusted admins and beautiful players across the world. I hope you all know just how much I love you.

006. What muse/s have you enjoyed most seeing on this dash this year?

I really love seeing everybody on the dash, but Charlie’s and Becca’s ( @loutommo-x , @teylcrswift ) always bring a smile to my face just from them posting a queue even, I love them both so much, I love their ship so much, and I hope to keep building bonds with them IC and OOC!

007. What is your favorite thing your muse/s have done this year in the group? (can be in the real world or what you made up)

In real life, I’d say that Ariana’s album and music videos had to be so exciting for her, and I hope it was as thrilling for her as it was for me, but with my Ari in this beautiful world of HWland, I’d say her trip to London was exciting. I mean, she does want to move there now so it has to count for something.

008. What would you like to see in HollywoodlandHQ in 2019?

I think some tasks could be a lot of fun! Like this alone has brought a lot of focus on my character and I feel like when people bond with their muse enough to answer questions like these, they’re more likely to keep wanting to come back, and I love that! I love feeling more connected to Ariana, it fuels my need to develop her, and even simple tasks like a mixtape or moodboard could open up a path in my opinion.

009. What is a plot you would love to do with your muse/s?

I’d love to add some more angst into Ariana’s story line.. I’ve got a plot page, ( don’t look at it, that shit is totally empty ), but I’d love to fill it up with all kinds of stories to play along with, and something that’s both rip and mend my heart could be really fun! You know.. Stuff that people like @ohlizzo and @hqcentineo do that both kill me and make me feel alive. :) That smile is exactly how you think it is.

010. Tag somebody in the RP and say something nice about them. It’s the season of giving.

@hcurly you already know I couldn’t go without saying something about you. I love you to the moon and back, and that trip ten times over. You make every day feel like a blessing for me, and I consider myself the luckiest person to not only know of you, but to personally get to know you and spend time writing with your Harry. The best one, hands down, that I’ve ever come across, and I know I can’t live without you now. I just can’t put it into proper words what you and Harry mean to me now, and I know nothing could ever change that. <3

And how could I do a post like this and not mentioned @itstbellisario. You are so precious as a player and your characters are the same way, I adore you and I love how sweet you’ve been from the very get. I’m shit at my replies, but I hope you know I love every one of them that I have with you, and I’ll forever appreciate you being here in this RP with me. Troian and Haley forever belong in my Hall of Fame.

To finish this off, though, I want to dedicate the best time of my life this year to the wonderful admins that run this place, that bust their ass off to make it the best RP I’ve ever been in. It’s been exactly 2 months of me being here, only 1/6th of the entire year, but I couldn’t have had a better ending note for it if it weren’t for you all! Thank you, thank you, thank you. I could cry tears of gratitude for you, for this RP. Some people may think it’s just some website, but it saves lives and you’re all to thank for that. I love you. <3

@hcurly @gigihqs @kjapayo @liliisms @diannahq @hollandjpg @itsgenevievegnt

#hwlandendofyear #[ hwlandendofyear ]#[ mun talks ]#( i love you all so damn much #that's made me very emotional )

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liliisms · 6 years ago

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👸 2 k 1 8 review 👸

001. What is your proudest accomplishment of this year? - Getting to make a speech about the power of body image at the Glamour Women of the Year Summit. As proud as I am of Riverdale (and I’m extremely proud), I have always wanted to use my voice for something useful. I’ve struggled with body acceptance my whole life, always self-conscious about my skin or thighs or boobs and it was only with the support from my family and friends that I finally learned how to become comfortable in my own body. Society and the media can be very damaging to young women and men’s self-esteem as they grow throughout the years and I wanted to use my platform to promote loving yourself for exactly who you are, imperfections and all. I’ve always tried to be genuine and true to myself and to get to be able to speak to so many people..well, it was truly a honor and I try to set an example everyday of what it means to love your body and your soul.

002. What is the biggest life lesson you learned this year? - I have the power to take control of how people make me feel. I don’t have to read the hateful comments. I don’t have to watch the videos insulting me and my friends just for them to get views. I can block people and turn away from spiteful people who think they have the right to talk about my life. I don’t owe anything anybody and the only person I should be trying to impress is myself. The minute I stopped caring about what people thought of me and started to live for myself, to make myself happy, is the minute a million of worries flitted away and I felt myself relaxing. I only get one life and I intend to live it the way I see fit.

003. What is one relationship (can be friendship) that has helped you survive this year? - I’m going to be predictable with this answer, but how can I say anybody but Cole @coleffs ? He’s truly been my rock. Not only in the sense of being there from day one of stepping into this crazy industry to learn how to handle the pressures that come with fame, but he’s also always been one hundred percent genuine with me. I’ve never had to be anyone but myself with him and to feel that love from him, to see how much he cared about me with no frills, no glitter, no pretending really helped me to also love myself even more. He’s taught me a lot - how to appreciate life a little deeper, how to take not take myself so seriously when I can get caught up in the little things, how to be patient and breathe when I feel myself trembling in fear of not living up to my potential. He sees the best in me, always and for that, he’s helped me to open myself up so many experiences. Falling in love is the scariest thing you can ever do and yet with him, he made is so easy and effortless. Cole’s been there through late nights, early mornings, crazy outings, quiet walks, and wild chaos and I’ve never seen him as anything other than imperfectly perfect. He’s truly my soul mate and the love of my life and I’d be lost without him.

004. Who or what do you need to let go of in order to make next year even better than this year? - I’m definitely going to focus less on social media and getting caught up in the drama that comes with comments and unwanted opinions, and focus more on the support that comes from the people I love. I also think I need to be more reckless - not in a bad way, but stop thinking about so much what will happen if I don’t make a certain decision and start thinking about what I could gain if I do.

005. What did you do this year that you’ve never done before? - Where do I start? Gone to Hawaii. Rode in a hot air balloon. Flew in a helicopter over mountains and had a picnic a thousand feet in the air. Was on a television soundtrack. I’m a very lucky girl.

006. What are three resolutions or goals you want to make happen next year? - 1) Bring Addy out to LA more, 2) Do more little things for Cole to surprise him, and 3) Try to get more product and business deals about ideas I support and care about.

007. Where did most of your money go this year? - Without a doubt, junk food and skin care products.

008. What song will always remind you of this year? - Can’t Help Falling in Love by Kina Grannis.

009. How will you be spending the last day of this year? - I think my friend Austyn and I are going on a little trip, but I’m not sure yet! I’ve yet to really set anything in stone.

010. Who is the best new person you’ve met this year? - Haley and Kiernan! They’ve really become two of my newest sisters. @hqhaleyluhoo & @keekshipka

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001. What relationship (can be friendship) has been the most fun to write for your muse/s this year? - For Lili, writing SH with Vic has been incredibly sweet and I’m grateful she was willing to keep their relationship and that she’s stuck with me this long. I’m always waiting with bated breath for really amazing ship partners to drop me but she’s never made me feel anything less than wanted and appreciated, so it just makes the ship that much more precious to me. As for friendships, I always get a kick out of Lili/Saoirse. @irishxseahorse has such a great sense of humor and never fails to make me laugh.

For Keegan, the Treegan relationship wasn’t really a surprise but I was happy with how naturally it developed. You don’t always have chemistry even if your fc’s do in real life but Emily has been such a perfect Troian. Seeing as how I’ve played Troian for the majority of my RP years, I’m very picky with how people play her and Em fits the bill. ;) I love that it’s not rushed, it’s going at a very easy and natural pace, and how willing Emily always is to talk to me and to keep my muse high with cute muse inspo. And for friendships, Keegan/Lizzie! @ohlizzo Be prepared for 2019, Sadie. Keegan’s gonna worm his way into Lizzie’s heart.

And on Munro, I’ve been lucky enough to sort of ship with Vic again with Munro/Cristine. We decided to give them a shot and I love the messy friends with benefits plot. I can’t wait to focus on them more and hopefully do more with them next year. I also really love Munro and Natalia’s friendship. @itsnataliadyr Eena is the actual sweetest and I adore how immediately playful their interactions became. I always look forward to replying to her and love her Natalia.

002. In what ways do you connect to your muse/s? - Out of all of them, I think I connect to Lili the most not only because she’s the only female muse, but also because we’re both fellow Virgos. I’m a big astrology nerd and I believe your sign impacts your personality so I feel like she’s a kindred spirit to me in a way. She’s definitely as impulsive with her words as I am and we both share the same sense of humor. With Keegan, I relate deeply to his sensitivity and his love for cats because I am the biggest cat lady and would have a million cats if I could. He also wears his heart on his sleeve and I do too. And with Munro..he’s probably the muse I have the least in common with but we do share a love for geekdom so that’s fun!

003. What’s your favorite category to write for your muse/s? (angst, fluff, smut, etc.) - I haven’t been able to write much smut here because not everybody is comfortable writing it (which is totally cool) but smut & angst is probably my favorite to write because I feel like that’s where I shine. I don’t know what that says about me but..Those are my top two categories where I get the most compliments on my writing. Obviously fluff is great and we all know I can wax on forever with mushy and sappy stuff..

004. If you could give your muse/s one gift, what would you give them? - I can’t afford anything for them, but if I could, I’d give her the Chipotle black card because she seems to really want it. Or a sponsorship by Dominos. I’d also love to give her a big hug and tell her how much I admire her, and how much her words mean to me. It’s so nice to be a fan of a woman who isn’t afraid to speak her mind and who promotes loving yourself and not being ashamed if you’re a little different from everyone else.

For Keegan, I’d give him notebooks and demand he write more songs and scripts and cast Troian in all of them. I’d also give him another kitten friend because who doesn’t want more kittens?

And for Munro, I’d beg him to get Instagram just so I can know what he’s up to! Seriously though, Munro seems like a simple guy but I’d give him Lion King tickets and then make him go with me so I can hide in his arms when Mufasa dies. NOT READY, NEVER READY.

005. What was your favorite event/moment/memory in HollywoodlandHQ this year? - Is it cheesy if I say when we opened? I was really excited and so proud and I felt like I finally crossed something off my bucket list. I wanted a safe place for the people I loved to create and write. I also loved the Halloween event! Anything a little spooky, I love.

006. What muse/s have you enjoyed most seeing on this dash this year? - Lizzie is one of my favorites simply because I think Sadie writes her perfectly, and I always love seeing my ship partners on the dash because my stomach gets all fuzzy and I know good things are gonna happen.

007. What is your favorite thing your muse/s have done this year in the group? (can be in the real world or what you made up) - For Lili, it’s been the gift of all the pictures she’s released. She’s gorgeous, she’s real, and I love all the content she blesses us with. I’m also so proud of her work on Riverdale this year. She stepped up her game.

Keegan hasn’t done much but Million Miles Away was a jam and his podcast was great! In the group, I obviously was happy when he finally kissed Troian. ;) @itstbellisario

And Munro seems to have booked a lot of new projects so I’m excited for them to come out. His performance in Knuckleball is INCREDIBLE and just proves how good of an actor he is.

008. What would you like to see in HollywoodlandHQ in 2019? - Apart from events that pair up people who don’t interact much (which seems to be the biggest want), I’d love more themed events. I’d love supernatural!week, AU!week, holiday events, even more events like the earthquake that affects the whole group and not a select group of people. I also love when memes are done, even if we still need to improve on everyone playing them fairly. Memes that set up plots and help further IC drama will be worked on too. And obviously, I really want the group to keep growing!

009. What is a plot you would love to do with your muse/s? - I’d love to do something dramatic with Lili - she’s clearly got a steady head on her shoulders and I don’t want to make her too OOC, but writing her struggle with something whether that be a relationship with somebody or with herself would be great with character development.

With Keegan, I’m excited to work out his growing relationship with Troian. I can’t wait to write out all the beginnings of a ship and see what comes from it.

And with Munro, I’d really just like him to have more connections. I’d love to see more Degrassi fc’s in the group but also get him involved with more people. He’s a really goofy guy and he’s also loyal af, so he’d be great for friendship plots. Also, him developing something with Cristine and maybe fucking it up a little would be good drama!

010. Tag somebody in the RP and say something nice about them. It’s the season of giving. - To my fellow admins @diannahq, @elizajanetc, @itsgenevievegnt, @ohlizzo, @sebffs and @hcurly - I love you. I appreciate you SO much. You guys do tireless (and sometimes thankless) work to make this place running and an accepting place for everybody. Thanks for the Discord chats, the support for real life and roleplay, and always willing to step up and make this the greatest damn group in the game.

Katie - Even when I’m married, you’ll have my Netflix and Hulu password. Thanks for being the Lucy to my Troian, the Goose to my Shmian, and the Manny to my Emma. I love you. You’re always there for me, and you’re always keeping me honest and inspire me to be a better person.

KJ - I love you too and thank you for always believing in me and loving me more than I do myself. I can’t wait for another year of friendship with you.

Eena - You’re the best advice giver and the best ear to talk to. You always make me smile and nobody’s softer or kinder than you. I love you, you gentle soul.

Sadie - You’re a woman of mystery but we love you anyways. You’re probably our group mama and you keep us in line. You’re also incredibly supportive and talented.

Laura - I hope to get to know you even better in 2019! You’re always a sweetheart.

Nikki - I love your big heart and your willingness to do whatever to make everyone feel comfortable. You’re too pure for us.

Sam @theflashgrant @yochriswood - I’ve known you for so long and each year, my love for you grows stronger. I love the person you are and the person you’re becoming. You truly inspire me with your strength and if there’s anyone worthy of good things happening to them, it’s you. Thanks for always making me laugh and being there for me. I’m ride or die for you, lady.

My ship partners @coleffs @crisprosperi @itstbellisario - you two keep me inspired to log on here every day and I thank you for putting up with me. I love the relationships we’ve created and I love that you love them as much as I do. Thank you for the muse posts, the songs, the memes, and the IMs. Thank you for also being my friends. I’d be lost without you two. I love our babies and I can’t wait to see what we do in 2019.

Ally @hqmaia - <333333333333 is really all I can say. We may not ship here but 2019 is gonna be great for our ships too. I’m so happy you’re in this group as well!

My fellow Riverdale-ians @hqcami @kjapayo @hqmads @coleffs @hqnessa @ulrichisms - You guys are the greatest pretend co-workers ever. Riverdale forever. <3 Thank you for letting me live out the friendships I love and being so amazing at all of your roles.

And to all of the members, who I consider my family - without you, this group wouldn’t work. You all belong here. You all are safe here. And you all are loved here. Thank you for doing this meme and giving us feedback and spreading positivity. I couldn’t be prouder to be your admin and to write with you. I’m the luckiest RPer ever.

@hwlandhqgossip

#hwlandendofyear #( hashtag becca logic. )#( musings. )

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