#'doesn't this media take you back to a simpler time' not really. and i don't want it to take me to a simpler time anyways

[arcaneyouth]

i don't really give a shit about kids media anymore and sometimes i have to wonder how much of that is i don't really have nostalgia and how much of that is simply My Interests Have Changed

[jonnywaistcoat]

What’s your opinion on the contrast between “silly” and “serious” spaces? Do you think people can have very serious interpretations about a genuine piece of media and also be goofy about it? I’m asking this particularly because I’ve seen people in the Magnus podcast fandoms fight about people “misinterpreting” characters you, Alex, and the many other authors have written. Are you okay with the blorbofication or do you really wish the media you’ve written would be “taken seriously” 100% of the time?

And follow up question, what do you think about the whole “it’s up to the reader (or in some cases, listener) to make their own conclusions and interpretations and that does not make them wrong”, versus the “it was written this way because the author intended it this way, and we should respect that” argument?

This is a question I've given a lot of thought over the years, to the point where I don't know how much I can respond without it becoming a literal essay. But I'll try.

My main principle for this stuff boils roughly down to: "The only incorrect way to respond to art is to try and police the responses of others." Art is an intensely subjective, personal thing, and I think a lot of online spaces that engage with media are somewhat antithetical to what is, to me, a key part of it, which is sitting alone with your response to a story, a character, a scene or an image and allowing yourself to explore it's effect on you. To feel your feelings and think about them in relation to the text.

Now, this is not to say that jokes and goofiness about a piece of art aren't fucking great. I love to watch The Thing and drink in the vibes or arctic desolation and paranoia, or think about the picture it paints of masculinity as a sublimely lonely thing where the most terrible threat is that of an imposed, alien intimacy. And that actually makes me laugh even more the jokey shitpost "Do you think the guys in The Thing ever explored each other's bodies? Yeah but watch out". Silly and serious don't have to be in opposition, and I often find the best jokes about a piece of media come from those who have really engaged with it.

And in terms of interpreting characters? Interpreting and responding to fictional characters is one of the key functions of stories. They're not real people, there is no objective truth to who they are or what they do or why they do it. They are artificial constructs and the life they are given is given by you, the reader/listener/viewer, etc. Your interpetation of them can't be wrong, because your interpretation of them is all that there is, they have no existence outside of that.

And obviously your interpretation will be different to other people's, because your brain, your life, your associations - the building blocks from which the voices you hear on a podcast become realised people in your mind - are entirely your own. Thus you cannot say anyone else's is wrong. You can say "That's not how it came across to me" or "I have a very different reading of that character", but that's it. I suppose if someone is fundamentally missing something (like saying "x character would never use violence" when x character strangles a man to death in chapter 4) you could say "I think that's a significant misreading of the text", but that's only to be reserved for if you have the evidence to back it up and are feeling really savage.

I think this is one of the things that saddens me a bit about some aspects of fandom culture - it has a tendency to police or standardise responses or interpretations, turning them from personal experiences to be explored into public takes to be argued over. It also has the occasional moralistic strain, and if there's one thing I wish I could carve in stone on every fan space it's that Your Responses to a Piece of Art Carry No Intrinsic Moral Weight.

As for authorial intention, that's a simpler one: who gives a shit? Even the author doesn't know their own intentions half the time. There is intentionality there, of course, but often it's a chaotic and shifting mix of theme and story and character which rarely sticks in the mind in the exact form it had during writing. If you ask me what my intention was in a scene from five years ago, I'll give you an answer, but it will be my own current interpretation of a half-remembered thing, altered and warped by my own changing relationship to the work and five years of consideration and change within myself. Or I might not remember at all and just have a guess. And I'm a best case scenario because I'm still alive. Thinking about a writers possible or stated intentions is interesting and can often lead to some compelling discussion or examination, but to try and hold it up as any sort of "truth" is, to my mind, deeply misguided.

Authorial statements can provide interesting context to a work, or suggest possible readings, but they have no actual transformative effect on the text. If an author says of a book that they always imagined y character being black, despite it never being mentioned in the text, that's interesting - what happens if we read that character as black? How does it change our responses to the that character actions and position? How does it affect the wider themes and story? It doesn't, however, actually make y character black because in the text itself their race remains nonspecific. The author lost the ability to make that change the moment it was published. It's not solely theirs anymore.

So yeah, that was a fuckin essay. In conclusion, serious and silly are both good, but serious does not mean yelling at other people about "misinterpretations", it means sitting with your personal explorations of a piece of art. All interpretations are valid unless they've legitimately missed a major part of the text (and even then they're still valid interpretations of whatever incomplete or odd version of the text exists inside that person's brain). Authorial intent is interesting to think about but ultimately unknowable, untrustworthy and certainly not a source of truth. Phew.

Oh, and blorbofication is fine, though it does to my mind sometimes pair with a certain shallowness to one's exploration of the work in question.

[otogariado]

only halfway thru the new frieren episode i was almost tearing up because the theme of protecting each other and caring about life more importantly than winning is so poignant. not all the characters are human in species but once again the humanity is blossoming in frieren's story. i was so afraid they'd actually get killed last ep but i mean it's so funny now what was i even thinking. this is frieren. they won't kill unless it was really necessary.

the reveal that richter raised the platform not to make his fight with lawline and kanne easier but actually to protect them from denken's attacks was so good. the "magic is nothing if you cannot imagine it" line is so wonderful because i'm a big fan of magic systems that revolve around that logical "science-y" aspect of like. understanding how it will work in order to do it. (same reason why i love the magic in "world's greatest assassin".) laufen getting caught by frieren even though she knows it's a trap just bc she didn't want denken to get hurt was also so good. the reveal that denken didn't have a grander motive to be a first class mage beyond "i wanna go back to my hometown and visit the cementary there but only first class mages are allowed to enter" was so painfully human and so reflective of real life. it also strikes you because he was introduced as a high-profile, politically influential mage.

i love what denken says about not going out without a fight. i love that the episode ends in a fistfight for him. i love it when media uses fistfights and punching in such an emotionally-charged human way, beyond the violence, instead depicting it as some sort of catharsis really. because sometimes all you need is a good rough n tumble. in denken's case, it's his way of not giving up without a fight. i like that. i also like that this was foreshadowed by denken telling laufen to cut the tree down instead of trying to cut the restraint. "we don't have any mana" "neither do they". sometimes all it takes is to find a differently way to approach your problems and sometimes the solution is simpler than you think.

i'm a big fan of frieren breaking the barrier because she thought it was unfair to cut kanna (and by extension lawline) out of her source of magic, giving her an unfair disadvantage and honestly a handicap. it's a short part of the episode but it's so important, because it shows that if people are given the right tools and the accessibility, they can do for themselves what they want and need to do. i love that frieren is like "can you imagine winning against a water manipulating mage with water around? i can't."

i'm a fan of how the "basic" combat and defensive magic are depicted and treated as in this show. yes, people more on from traditions, but traditions are there in the first place. richter's explanation of magic history in their world provides an insight to how modern magic evolved from the foundations. but the foundations were still foundations for a reason. they made it a point with fern saying "frieren doesn't restrict me from spells" (even tho it was the setup for a small joke) that the point isn't to pick a side between tradition vs modern, but rather to learn from both and decide for yourself what you want to apply to yourself. the depiction of fern and frieren winning with traditional magic and richter and kanne overwhelming each other with modern magic makes it clear that the show isn't trying to preach to either side.

i also like the theme of "pursuing magic out for the sake of magic is enough". it's nice to hear that denken shares this mindset with frieren, because again he was introduced as someone influential and you'd think he thinks like he could use magic as a source of power. and that's the impression i got of him too from previous episodes, but a lot of first impressions of mine were proven wrong later and i'm so happy for that bc these characters have so much depth packed into them in so little time.

what else have i missed...

[soie-lux]

Looking Back at My 2022 Goals: Leveling Up Mentally and Spiritually in 2023

As 2022 comes to a close, take some time to reflect. Look back at the goals you set at the beginning of the year. How did you do? What are some things you wish you would've done differently?

My goals for this year were:

I honestly didn't look back too much at this list throughout the year, but I can thankfully say many of my goals have organically been incorporated in my routines and daily life bit by bit as the year went on.

It doesn't matter if you started working towards your goals January 1st or December 1st, all that matters is that you had the discipline to start. To implement every single one of your goal's January 1st can be overwhelming to some, and discouraging when you fail to keep up the habits, which is why so many people drop their New Year's resolutions in the first 2-3 weeks. You don't have to sprint towards the finish line the second the new year begins. Be gentle with yourself. By implementing your goals slowly and gradually into you daily life, you are more likely to keep up with them.

One of my goals for 2022 was to do some form of joyful movement at least 5 days out of the week. I found pilates, stretching, and daily walks worked best for me rather than going to a gym. I want to be able to enjoy life freely for as long as possible and that means taking care of myself and my body. During the summer months, my 5am morning walks and pilates were Godsend. It required serious discipline to get to wake up so early, but it was so worth it! I feel so much stronger and energized! This is a habit I definitely want to carry into 2023. I wasn't consistent with my daily joyful movement it until May, and that's okay! Starting later is better than not starting at all.

Setting limits on social apps has really helped decrease my screen time. I've definitely noticed the less I spent online, the better I felt mentally and my mindset regarding online/media spaces has shifted drastically. I don't feel the need to be in the loop when it comes to the latest trends of what's "in" vs what's "out." No longer am I caught up in the happenings of celebrity and internet culture (the less you check into trending topics and gossip blurbs, you'll find yourself caring less and less about them, trust me). I noticed the more time I spent obsessing over social media and trying to fit into a specific aesthetic, the less I was able to truly be myself. Get off the internet and learn about yourself!! Forget about trends, what do you like to wear? What do you like to do? Don't let the internet fool you into behaving in a way that makes you feel artificial. Since I've learned this, life has become so much richer and simpler.

Quality over quantity has been a big theme for me this year. I wanted to apply this to my closet as well and create a capsule wardrobe filled with high quality pieces rather than fast fashion items. I've always been drawn neutral tones and earthy tones, but recently have developed a soft-spot for navy and burgundy. I've slowly been swapping out my polyester and acrylic items for pieces made of pure silk, linen, cotton, cashmere, and wool. I'm at a place now where I'd rather spend my money on one high quality basic that will last me years and years than numerous fast fashion items of equal monetary value.

Cooking and baking has always been a hobby of mine, but after some mental/health challenges, I found it hard to enjoying being in the kitchen. I don't remember the moment it all clicked, but the autumn months really helped me fall back in love with cooking. All the things I was doing to physically keep my body moving made me want to ensure I was fueling my body properly as well. I spent less time in grocery stores and more time at farmers markets talking to the farmers/vendors and learning about where the food I'm eating is actually coming from!! Organic produce, free-range eggs, grass-fed meats, locally made bread and locally harvested honey as much as possible. Cooking and baking things from scratch instead of buying it processed from the super market. Eating with the seasons. Making my first sourdough starter. Beginning with a few basic ingredients and witnessing something beautiful come into fruition from oven to plate. I'm so thankful I was able to discover an all-new joy for being in the kitchen this year, and I plan to continue to harness these skills in 2023.

I thank God for the way He has helped me grow in my faith this year. Spending time in His word daily. Praying to Him not just as part of my morning and nightly routine, but sometimes multiple times throughout my day just to chat or ask for guidance. Learning to put His will for my life above my own. Learning to trust Him with everything in my life and giving Him full control. Learning to serve others rather than always looking to be served. In the beginning of the year, my goal was to become "that girl," but now my goal is to become the woman of God the Lord wants me to be. I want to be a woman after His own heart. To spreads God's love with the world by being gentle, kind, wise, graceful, poised, soft-spoken, and selfless. I am in no way perfect, but I'm thankful for the growth I've seen this year and I thank God in advance for the work He will do in me this coming year.

[kismetconstellations]

🔥 + anything Zac Efron related, please & thank you :)

(You can ignore the first one. I should really read instructions all the way through before sending in asks)

No worries. You are totally fine. ^//^

Let's hope this doesn't get too inflammatory.

I'm not a fan of the Marvel Cinematic Universe for a variety of reasons, and would prefer Zac never be a part of it.

I think Zac's indie dramas are infinitely more fascinating than his mainstream comedies (they also come with the added bonus of not humiliating and disrespecting him while also objectifying him at every turn), and hope that he continues to do more of them.

Honestly, anything that keeps him out of Hollywood and away from the toxicity of the industry is all right with me.

Seeing his malnourished Baywatch physique continually held up as some sort of "ideal" upsets me to my core. All the more so, knowing just how negatively the whole experience affected him, contributing to his depression and insomnia and causing him to tear up on-camera when he was finally able to eat carbs, again.

This will come as absolutely no shock to anyone who has been following me since 2016, when the world was treated to, as I like to call them, High School Musical Shitstorm: Parts Un and Deux, but I strongly feel that Zac doesn't owe the collective High School Musical fandom any reprisals of his role as the heart and soul of the franchise. Especially when so many people who consider themselves a part of that fanbase are all too keen to minimize or outright ignore Zac and Troy's significance to the original trilogy's success, mock and deride both of them as "boring" or worse, and leave nasty comments like this--

-- on social media posts of members of the cast reuniting. (Please do not seek out or bother any of the people in the above screenshot, by the way. I don't believe that you or any of my other followers would, but it's still a necessary precaution, just in case. Please be kind, everyone. Even when others are not.) I know it's immature and petty on my end, but I don't see why people who behave this way and treat Zac's professional attempts to distance himself from this franchise with scorn and further mockery, even though his past reputation as a "tween heartthrob" still colors directors' perceptions of him, resulting in him needing to prove himself worthy nearly twenty years on, should be rewarded. I feel for the fans who crave a High School Musical reunion because it would take them back to a simpler, happier time in their lives, but the films are right there and always will be there to be revisited at any time. The past is the past for a reason, and Zac, just like anyone else, should be allowed to move on.

Zac was perfectly cast as Phillip Carlyle. There is no one else who could have brought Phillip to life as immaculately, and no actor more deserving of the career revitalization The Greatest Showman delivered tenfold. My sympathies go out to Jeremy Jordan if he legitimately did have to sing live demos of "all of Hugh's songs", as well as Phillip's, before the studio executives while recovering from a nasty bout of laryngitis. That does not, however, make him entitled to a role he never so much as considered auditioning for.

Zac, on the other hand, had already been involved with the production for four years, alluding to a potential upcoming role in a movie musical as early as 2015, and contacting studios on director Michael Gracey's behalf to assist him, Hugh, and the rest of the crew in getting the green light.

Thus, you can imagine how thoroughly it rankles me to see fans of Mr. Jordan insinuating that Zac, a legitimate triple threat, was an inferior choice made to secure the support of Zac's larger fanbase, or- even more deluded- to placate the "ego" of show business veteran Hugh Jackman, who was supposedly "threatened" by Mr. Jordan's vocal prowess.

The Greatest Showman Cast is superior to the High School Musical Cast; in terms of talent, camaraderie, and maturity. You don't see any of them making backhanded comments years later about Zac being their "worst on-screen kiss", or their "favorite scene" with Zac being one where his character was "so dumb". (Even though Troy was very obviously emotionally manipulated into believing that something was going on with Ryan and Gabriella, by Gabriella. That's such a low, douchebaggy thing to say, and my already minimal respect for Lucas Grabeel has dropped to near non-existent because of it.)

---

And, I think that's about it. Thank you so very much for asking, and I sincerely apologize a million times over for it taking me so long to post this response! I've been quite busy babysitting my niece and tending to personal affairs, and haven't had the energy to properly run this blog. But, I'm hoping to get back into the swing of things, and put more lovely things onto my followers' dashboards.

I appreciate your patience, and I hope that these answers prove to be worth the wait. ❤

[mable-stitchpunk]

I've watched your video on Eleanor and I'd love to ask a few questions!

Do you think her character could ever be redeemed and if so, how? Like, do you think she should be made into a game villain, similar to Baby, or a side character? Maybe a new animtatronic with a backstory? Or do you think she should just never appear in any of the media again?

Would love to hear your thoughts!

Sure thing! 8D

It depends on what you mean! I'm guessing you mean redeemed as a character, not like redeemed in the story. I think she's killed too many people for that. XD Jokes aside, I DO think Eleanor could've worked if a few more steps were taken.

I think she could work as a game villain. (Not sure if To Be Beautiful could translate into a full Fazbear Frights game though) The most important part would be to implement her in a way that doesn't feel too... like she's a reference to the books. Have a sizeable enough encounter that people look her up because they're curious, not confused. Having her be a new animatronic could definitely help in that!

A new backstory could also benefit Eleanor. Adding an agony demon to the games might be a little too detached from the current plot. For reference, the books seemed to have trouble explaining it. Something a little simpler would probably suffice. Such as- - An animatronic built to collect Agony. - An animatronic haunted by Agony and thus seeks it out. Or the tried and true: - Afton's old and forgotten organ retrieval robot who used to harvest fresh organs for him to do funky experiments on.

And honestly, I do think Eleanor should've had her own design instead of looking like Baby. I don't mind her looking like a human or a doll, but I think making her look like Baby sort of sold short her potential by making her a variation of an earlier character. You know? So, if they brought her back, having a somewhat more distinct design- even if it is a severely broken Baby- could help her be her own unique thing.

I'm not sure at this time Eleanor could be introduced so abruptly as a main villain and really stick, but she could probably be introduced as a side threat- imagine like Sun/Moon- and with the right first appearance she could really take off.

I think the only way Eleanor could've been really worked into the plot semi-seamlessly(?) before this point and had herself as a true big bad is if she was involved with the Vanny plotline somehow. Like if in Security Breach, Vanessa and Vanny were shown separately, so you think Vanessa is good and Vanny is evil. But then, surprise! Vanessa is actually possessed and Vanny (played by Eleanor) is the fallguy/fakeout to cover for good cop Vanessa.

Now I'm not saying that's a good idea, but I can't see any other place before now where Eleanor's specific abilities could've been brought into play. Going forward from now, anything's possible!

And as for Eleanor appearing again, I would be mildly curious. But only if it's her and not Foxy who's later revealed to be her. XDD

I hope that answered your questions! 8D If you have any more, please ask!

[sunflwryu]

tldr; i'm probably not going to write on this blog anymore.

i don't want to say that i won't completely because hey, maybe one day i'll feel like it, but this is what i wanted to say because i don't want to leave you all waiting...well, it's likely you've stopped after some due to my inactivity and that's okay and valid!

i became inactive here because i wasn't enjoying writing anymore, nor was i into k-pop that much, especially since i was into it a lot to help me cope with how terrible and lonely my life was and felt, and sometimes it still is. writing became somewhat of a hollow thing for me, and i tried so many times to write my drafts, to get the words out, but i couldn't. i would be taking things out of my control that had to do with my blog and writing to heart, i would get so frustrated and depressed at myself to the point that i put an incredible amount of pressure on myself to write something, anything, and when i didn't, my thoughts would spiral on top of what i already had to deal with irl.

so i left this tumblr behind for the sake of myself, hoping that maybe my passion and love for writing would reignite after a break, but it hasn't, not for this blog, only for the journal entries i wrote to cope with my daily life and mental health. i've never been much of a social media person anyway.

i feel like a completely different person than when i was last here. i'm not into k-pop anymore and i barely know what's going on in terms of news and drama but i'll tune into some songs and the older ones that give me nostalgia from simpler times. i've made friends who genuinely appreciate me and i've gotten better at setting my boundaries when it matters and taking care of myself. i have someone that genuinely likes me and always is there for me and tells me i'm beautiful everyday without fail. my skin has gotten better and less painful these days too.

there's a lot that's happened since my last post a few months ago, but what i can say is my life has improved, although there are things i'm still working on, including my ultimate goal i'm still reaching for of a happiness that isn't so fragile.

i want to focus on that goal now.

that's not to say that this blog doesn't mean that much to me, because it does. it helped me so much back then to cope with what horrible things i was dealing with, to write about a world that's not this one, to help others who maybe felt like me, to free my heart of the ideas i kept suppressed for a long time. it really built that foundation for me to grow as i am now.

so thank you so much for all the likes, all the reblogs, the comments, the moots, the readers, the followers, the anons, everyone who's ever set sights on this little blog of mine.

thank you for sticking with me along the way and helping me to make this blog a place that i'm proud to look back upon, to reread my works again and remember how much fun i had writing them. thank you for liking them and telling me your thoughts, thank you for giving them love because that made me happier amidst what i was going through at the time. i hope i was able to give you all comfort and entertainment through the works i enjoyed to write.

i'll pop in sometimes (no promises on the frequency of that), read some stuff, answer asks, make major update posts, but i don't think i'll be around too much. oh, and don’t worry, my blog will stay up, i’ll never personally take it down unless smthg else interferes. if you've read this far, congratulations! have a heart ♥

but seriously, thank you for everything. — yumi

—

p.s. credits to @argodeon for the banner/image! it's so beautiful!

[pb-dot]

Time to Nerd Out over Undertale

So I found myself listening to some undertale covers here the other day (RichaadEB on the excellent PlayFrama YT channel for the curious) and it struck me how I'm still not over how good Undertale was. It's not just that the music is truly amazing, although I challenge anyone who's played the game to listen to, say Bergenstrückung or SAVE the world without getting a bit emotional. The game is just the kind of experience that is so vast that it's hard to see from up close.

I mean, let's start by talking mechanics, why don't we? Undertale is built around the idea that classic turn-based RPG menu combat is inherently violent and that violence is inherently bad and worthy of being rebelled against. It's refreshing stuff. You don't get Experience points for killing enemies, you get Execution Points, your Level doesn't go up, your LOVE - Level Of ViolEnce does, and the reward for doing so are progressively simpler and less rewarding boss fights (up until a point, more on that later) and an emptier bleaker world.

Undertale sells itself as "The RPG game where you don't have to destroy anyone," and it's very much the mindset one's supposed to carry into the game. It builds tension towards a fitting final boss for such a game, a powerful man who will absolutely not change his path or step down, a man who has sacrificed everything good in his life to do things he considers abhorrent for the greater good. Asgore Dreemur, the penultimate boss of the game's initial route, is determined enough about the whole thing to break through the game's fourth wall to destroy the button that'd allow you to spare his life under the right conditions. Only one of you can leave this encounter alive, and in true game logic, you dying doesn't give you an alternate ending as much as a game over. It's a bleak spot, and it doesn't get less so when the final boss turns into this mixed media bullet hell nightmare (designed by the ever-unsettling Everdraed ) that shuts down your game when you lose to him.

Where I would argue Undertale goes from good to transcendent, though, is in the second of three possible playthroughs, where you, the player, is enticed by a character seemingly living partially outside the continuity of the game to go back and give it another go. Perhaps, the game posits, your quest to resolve the plot without killing anyone doesn't have to end with a failure. I also love that the way you prepare to take on the tall task of trying to talk some sense into Asgore is by helping basically everyone else get their shit together so they can give you an assist on talking down the reluctantly murderous goat-man. It's mostly more shenanigans, except one sequence that I can only describe as "truly horrifying," True Lab.

The final boss you fight once the goat man has been smacked some sense into by his ex-wife, her skeleton boyfriend, and just about everyone else who's ever worked for him is a bit of a twist. It doesn't come out of left field exactly as it does resolve some foreshadowing, but it does go both wild and hard. Asriel Dreemur is at this point a bit of a mirror of the protagonist, an innocent child who is functionally being sidelined by an external force that uses his child's wonder and imagination to its own ends. You know, a bit like you the player do for the protagonist character Frisk.

It is actually really interesting to me how Undertale does its metafictional elements. Initially, the game prompts you to "name the fallen human" as a name input before showing our protagonist character falling into the underworld the game is set in. The implication is clear, your player character is the fallen human, and thus it makes sense when characters start calling you the name you chose. This is, however, a clever twist, as the protagonist isn't the fallen human, but rather a child named Frisk. The fallen human is a character from earlier in the story who looks a lot like Frisk and has a similar arc, although theirs ends considerably grimmer. They are also who possess the final boss and have twisted the wonder and playful energy of a child into a megalomaniac tyrant, letting the desire to keep playing twist time and space into this never-ending spiral of violence.

It's heady stuff, and to make it worse, alternatively better if you're into this kind of stuff, it ties into Undertale's most profound theme: When it's time to stop playing Undertale. Now, that sounds like a mean-spirited joke, but Undertale is, I would argue just as much about letting go of the story as it is about telling it. You see, after you complete the second playthrough, most commonly referred to as the True Pacifist route, the game is arguably over. The stated goal of telling an RPG story where nobody has to die is achieved, just about every character story is resolved, hilariously awkward dates are had left and right, the peaceful way of achieving Asgore's goals are found, peace between Humans of the world outside and the Monsters of the underworld is implied to be just around the corner. The story is, in many ways, at an end.

"Gee, Peebs," you might say, "that sounds like some portentous narration going on there" because you're a very perceptive reader like that. "Also," you might add, "isn't there a boss fight with a skeleton in there somewhere?"

And indeed there is. The Sans/Megalovania fight is easily the most famous part of Undertale, partially for how insanely difficult it is due to a confluence of unexpected mechanical interactions. Sans only does one damage at a time, but that damage is per frame and he attacks A LOT. He has no defense so one strike will cause the bone boy to crumble, that is if you could hit the dodgy bastard at all. Hell, if his onslaught of bone-themed attacks don't get you, he has also figured out that if he stops attacking you and just has a nap instead it'll never be your turn. It's a very clever fight, and Megalovania is an iconic track for a reason. That said, the most ingenious part about the whole thing for my money is that you're not really supposed to get to it. It's arguably an extended part of a fail state, but the fail state isn't mechanical as much as it is thematic.

So, after finishing a True Pacifist run, the one remaining designed way to play Undertale is by going through what's called a Genocide Run, although the game's creator Toby Fox has stated he prefers the term No Mercy route for reasons I am sure are obvious. In the No Mercy route, you play Undertale like any other RPG. When you get to a new area, you grind it, killing every monster that you encounter until it stops giving you good XP. In Undertale, this is taken a step further, as you will literally kill all the monsters present until the game presents you with empty encounters. I will mention I'm not really working off personal experience here, as the No Mercy route struck me as tedious and unfun, and I was pretty happy with the second ending in the game so I haven't played it myself.

The approach of the No Mercy run does change the game around you. Characters will be less friendly to you, and their boss battles will in many cases be harder as conflicted characters go all out to stop the combine harvester of misery that you've become. The game is, I would argue, less fun as your growing levels make you strong enough to trivialize bigger and bigger parts of the game until not even the bosses going all-out even provide a challenge. Near the end, you encounter Sans, a character you haven't fought in any of the other routes, a jokester and moral guide of sorts, and, unless you are entirely unreasonably good at the game and prepared for a surprise, he absolutely bodies you due to the mechanics mentioned above. It doesn't matter that you have high enough defense for Sans to do only one damage to you, he'll do one damage to you per frame for just about as many frames as it takes, it doesn't matter that you'll one-hit kill the slacker bag of bones, he's just going to dodge it. The only thing you can do is get really REALLY good at dodging Sans' many many attacks, and all the while, your moral guide and former friend berates you for not leaving well enough alone. What you've done is fucked up, and it's fucked up that you did it just to see if you could.

It's an interesting point to arrive at given how modern fandom is just about designed to lead you down the path to get you there. Fandom is about wanting to experience everything about a work, every line adapted, every scrap of worldbuilding expanded on, every weird little gremlin made protagonist for a day. It's the kind of sentiment that has people seek out gradually more expansive cuts of movies, to want to listen to unedited podcast episodes, to troll every line of game code for unused content, to test every interaction. The goal, I would argue, is trying to find a way to never stop consuming the content you like, to ride the high of it forever by just getting increasingly granular and obscure about which parts of it one keeps getting into. This, Undertale argues, is where love turns into obsession, where fandom enthusiasm turns sour.

Playing the No Mercy route isn't something you do because it's fun. The clever puzzles of sparing every enemy and boss is replaced by tedious grinding. The sympathetic characters all die trying to stop your murderous ass, and the marvelously cathartic ending is replaced by disappointment and anticlimax. No, you play No Mercy because it's there, it's possible to do, and despite how obviously unpleasant it is to actually play through, it does provide new content, new lore, and at least one highly memeable boss fight.

Is it worth it? I'd argue no. Even in a world where the sole good part of the No Mercy route isn't available in a million different iterations online, even in a world where completing the No Mercy run didn't flag your save file in ways that change future runs in small but unpleasant ways, it's not something you're meant to enjoy. The No Mercy route is the game's way of telling you there is a right time to stop playing Undertale, and it was before even starting that cursed run.

One of the reasons I think this is such a clever move is because it sidesteps one of the chief criticisms of trying to work morality into gameplay, i.e. "Why is the game giving me shit for something it told me, no, required me to do?" See the criticisms of The Last Of Us, Spec Ops: The Line, and others for examples. Undertale doesn't tell you to do the No Mercy run and shame you for it as much as it lets you know that it's there and just let the natural fandom impulse take you on an ill-advised journey. Granted, there is a level of the same as the whole thing is designed with the purpose of delivering, functionally, the same message, but the confidence Undertale has in not insisting you see every last inch of its content does counteract it a bit in my mind.

The wacky part to me is that all of this shameless praise is without getting into the music, you know the reason I started my breathless cheerleading in the first place. Toby Fox, as it turns out, can compose the hell out of a soundtrack. Megalovania is the most famous piece and rightfully so, but there's also Bergnegstrückung, Death By Glamour, Bonetousle, and a bunch of others. Just about every boss theme is so instantly evocative of their characters that the game feels like it has voice acting although it provably hasn't, and the wide range of styles stretches from ambient to jazzy to a couple of songs that would not sound at all out of place on a metal album. It's a cover artist's dream, as the simple but effective melodies leave ample room to put your own spin on things. I personally recommend the Insaneintherainmusic's whole Live At Grillby's album for the jazz and RichaadEBs Determination for the metal stuff.

Undertale is a weird work to get worked up about at this point for me, I think. People just about unanimously agree it's good, but it feels like an understatement to say that. This game changed indie gaming, charting out a course that's defined just about the entire creative space since then. The supreme confidence with which Toby Fox and his minuscule team wielded their own irreverent nerdy humor with laser-guided precision and made us all weep over a goat woman and a stout skeleton bonding over terrible terrible jokes, made us sputter with ineffectual rage at a rude flower and cry tears of joy as we contemplated whether to give the homicidal goat-man a hug or not. Undertale is weird and wild and meta, but I'd argue that it's most important feature is that it's earnest. It expects us to roll our eyes at it, but it'll roll 'em right back as it delivers some meta jab.

Perhaps Undertale's greatest strength, though, is probably also the reason it's kind of faded out of the public consciousness outside of the Megalovania meme and the sequel Deltarune. Undertale is a very complete story. It's the story it is designed to be, it closes off its loops, dots its is and crosses its ts. Thematically, it's about telling you a good story and closing the book on that story, trying to preserve it in your memory rather than have you re-experience it again and again. Granted, there is lore and implications and obscura with the whole W.D Gaster thing and Chara, the thing isn't hermetically sealed, but once you're done with the story you're supposed to be done with the story. It makes for a great experience in my opinion, but I suppose it doesn't naturally lend itself to being preserved in the public eye.

I will say this though, as far as sequels to things with functionally perfect endings, DELTARUNE is doing a way better job than those post-show Madoka Magica movies has ever done, although I haven't really gotten into it myself. To me, the story of Undertale is so perfectly conveyed and closed off that going back there feels wrong. Like I left it just the way I wanted it to end, and any further meddling on my part is bound to just make it less perfect. Maybe that means I've understood the assignment, or maybe it just means I've put the darn thing on an unreasonable pedestal. Who am I to say?

[thelittlekeyboard]

Fans Opinions On The Harry Potter Reboot: The 411

In recent news it has been confirmed that Harry Potter is getting revamped on MAX (formerly HBO MAX) and though it may feel as though the Deathly Hallows Part 2 was released merely last week, it has been over a decade, so perhaps it is time for a reboot?

No. It is not. It will never be and here's why:

The Original Cast

There is no way on God's green Earth that the perfection of the original cast can be matched. There is no one else for Harry Potter apart from Daniel Radcliffe and the same could be said for Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, and even Draco Malfoy with Emma Watson, Rupert Grint and Tom Felton respectively. You bring me a cast as perfect as this one and I challenge you this: do they have Alan Rickman? I thought not.

The Fans

I understand the need to engage new fans as this franchise will forever be able to provide income for the companies associated with it as long as the fan base keeps rolling in. What I'm struggling to grasp is, can't the youth of today simply read the books, or even simpler yet, watch the movies? I know that cinemas perform rereleases all the time so is it improbable to ask that Harry Potter arrange an international release?

Warner Bros can certainly afford the press release and have the capabilities to create hype as they tease the premise. Then, on a seemingly random day in summer we can have Harry Potter and The Philosopher's Stone hit the screens, the big boys of the operation can sit back and rake in the cash, and MAX doesn't get the opportunity to ruin one of the greatest franchises ever.

JK Rowling (Transphobia Gate)

It is no secret that in recent years it has come to light that JK Rowling is a transphobic p.o.s (mother, don't mind my tongue. It's for the good of the internet lol) and I'm not sure if producers have put 2 and 2 together, but I'll do it for them.

MAX Harry Potter = JK Rowling getting more money = giving power to scum like her

And sure, rereleasing Harry Potter in cinemas will line her pockets as well because she still has the rights to her own writing, but as long as people are paying for the media, she is earning money, and as fucked up as it may be, there isn't really anyway around it. So, wouldn't you argue that if we are going to take action to make it relevant again, we may as well do it in a way that means we don't waste even more resources in serving Her Transphobic Highness?

I am aware that most of this is strictly opinion and I'm sure a damn-sight more goes into making a rerelease or a new show than how I've so grossly understated, but still; the only Harry Potter most of us want to see is the old one, the cheapest way to this is with the old one, and using the old one means less money has to go into helping a decrepit scots-woman with a backwards thinking brain. Win-win-win if you ask me.

Tell me what your thoughts on this are in the notes or the ask section:)

xoxo, TheLittleKeyboard

[ask-bluesman]

A summary of changes

I spent the past couple of weeks on sick leave after having my tonsils removed, which means I had some spare time to take another look at my characters and their colours. I'm going back to work tomorrow, so let's take a quick glance at the tweaks (that may or may not be permanent.. man, I don't know anymore)!

Boatswain got his baggy pants back, though somewhat lighter this time. I was going through my sketchbook and figured I liked those just a little bit more than the slim ones. Bos is small, so it's not odd for him to wear oversized clothes! I changed the bandana to an earthy orange & his cap is slightly off-white (dirty) now, with a brown rim. Went back to bubbles coming out of his pipe instead of regular smoke. The very, very first boatswain I've ever drawn was blowing bubbles!

I decided to keep the lighter beard, soles and toe claws, I believe they make him just a tad more interesting. Ol' gramps certainly enjoys having a full set of claws, no doubt about that. I keep making his nose turquoise instead of cyan. Maybe it wants to stay this way? I like both!

Captain's white cap got swapped for a dusty, dark blue one. I wanted each lad to have a different hat, just to highlight the difference between their ranks. Blue caps are generally associated with aviation, but I think it still works well for him! The little fish is made of cardboard. Packie draws them himself and glues them, then proudly parades with them on his head until they eventually fall off and he has to do that again, haha.

I experimented with his colour scheme for quite a bit, but eventually kept it as it was. Very minor change to the jacket colour. I also shaved the fuzz off his scarf and threw a checked pattern on it instead. He deserves fancy neckwear! I hope Sakura never discontinues manufacturing the particular pen I draw these lines with because the colour is just perfect.

The way I approached admiral was pretty intuitive. I didn't look at any older doodles of him and simply drew what felt right. His outfit lost some details this way. His white hat is here to stay - I just changed the shape and look of the badge a little; not sure if I want the rim to be this dark blue or brown. I made his shoulder insignia simpler, as I meant to do it earlier. Completely forgot that little buckle on the strap and the third row of buttons on his boobies. These might come back, I don't know yet - I'm sloppy, so I have to cover small details with masking fluid (that prevents them from being painted) and just like 90% of watercolourists... golly, I hate using masking fluid.

I had quite a dilemma with his gloves and boots. Ultimately made them much lighter and I think this is how I prefer them. They add some much-needed contrast as up to this point his colour scheme was on the darker side and, to be perfectly honest, I wasn't a fan of that. I believe I'm not skilled enough to make proper use of dark colours, especially in traditional media, but it's ok! I enjoy the vintage feel of admiral's current colour palette.

And as for the main colour of his uniform? I had to ditch that previous indigo because I couldn't stand how the paint handled :( The one you see here is a custom mix, which, hopefully, won't be too hard to replicate. What I like about it is that it looks like a duller shade of Prussian Blue. A colour I tend to use sparingly because it fades, but otherwise love very, very much!

Nothing really changed about Taffy except that I made her ribbon lighter here. For some reason my scanner wasn't happy about that! The purples are very pink-leaning in the scanned version, while in person they are considerably cooler. I like them in person, but here... not so much. It could be the paper though, so I'll give it another go once I use up this particular supply (I'm about to)!

Her eyes are ever so slightly green-tinted, but it doesn't show here, does it? I will add a touch more green next time. This thing is surprisingly hard to balance because with too much green in her eyes she starts to look kinda spooky.

You have to wait for a bit before you hit your final form, Taffy!

I like Mia's colours, but it took two attempts to get them right and my gosh, was the first try icky and clashing. I'm going work on her overall look at some point in the future. I hope I can push her proportions to be somewhat more cartoony & her face to be more expressive. I took a glance at my older doodles of her and she looked as if she was a Disney princess' horse, haha. We want none of that here! Silly & homely looking horses all the way.

Rookie didn't change much either, I only picked a more vibrant shade of yellow for her scarf. I'm most likely going to go back to the older, more toned-down version. I enjoy punchy & vibrant colours - just not on my little ol' characters!

I also didn't grab my best black for Roo, but thankfully I have a replacement. Notice the tiny white dots all over the black parts? This is an undesirable trait in watercolour, some pigments do it naturally, but in some cases it's the formula or paper (or both). Sometimes I'm tempted to colour her black parts with a pen, but I think that would look too harsh. But you never know before you try it!

*****

Whew! That's it for the changes. I know these may not look like much (and it's true), but in reality I ended up removing and replacing a good portion of my paints for better alternatives. This means I had to build a new palette from scratch, holy smokes. I'd better stick with these tweaks because I really don't want to do this one more time!

EDIT: Oy, one last thing I wanted to add - looking at those doodles, I realised I need to try and fix my inking. It's not very good! I typically ink with fineliners (that's the easiest and simplest way), then colour, then go over my lines again to make them darker and thicker. But it also gives them this unappealing, rugged look. Next time I'll do just a single round & see how that looks!

[tyunni]

ㅤwhen you have another members pc in your phonecase !!

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤenhypen masterlist | library

a/n: ignore how the formatting is simpler than my other ones, i just couldn't be bothered. Anyways idk when i'm coming back, probably somewhere around June ?? This is just a simple post, you'll find me doing these at random times before June.

genre: crack, fluff; warnings: cursing, not proofread, mentions of burning something; disclaimer: this is obviously not how the members are in real life, it's all simply fanfiction. That is all, now enjoy!

Heeseung . . .

The second he spots his member's face inside your phonecase, he gets extremely awkward.

Tries his best not to let it bother him yet he can't help but eye the back of your device as you mindlessly scroll through social media, paying Heeseung and his growing frustration no mind... Which makes him sulk even more.

Feels as though you using Jay's photocard is your way of telling him you like Jay more, which is obviously false because Heeseung is literally your boyfriend but... God knows what goes on inside his head.

Doesn't really say anything about it so you just keep it there for a while, but you do notice that he acts more awkward around both you and Jay. Still you don't replace the pc until you get bored of it.

Once you do finally take the photocard out Heeseung lets out a sigh of relief and things go back to normal 🤨🤨

Jay . . .

He... Really does not care- i'm sorry HELP

Probably the last member to care about these sorts of things. Sure, he's a teeny tiny bit on the possessive and/or jealous side, but he loves you and you love him, why would he get jealous of some piece of paper??

I mean it was probably one of your pulls, the member looks great in that picture and you using the photocard in your phonecase is just your way of supporting the boy, so he sees no problem with it.

Although... He does suggest to buy you his pc in case you didn't get the pull you wanted (bcuz in his eyes manifesting his pcs should be your top priority when buying an album /hj)

But when you tell him that you're satisfied with the photocards and thank him, he just goes "oh, okay!" and continues with his day

Jake . . .

The second his eyes land on your phonecase, he's thinking of ways to tease you. A shithead #1

"ooooo y/n who's that in your phonecase??? Is that Sunoo?? oOOoOO DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM OR SMTH?? Girl, spill! Tell me all about it" "Jake i've been dating you for over a year now, what are you even talking about-"

Doesn't really care, much like Jay, he just likes to tease and be a playful asshole from time to time. Annoys you so much you're ready to shred the poor photocard to pieces.

His intentions weren't to make you take out the pc and replace it with his, but he isn't against it either. Whispers to Sunoo about how you fancy him and Sunoo just stands there confused as fuck because aren't you and Jake literally dating-

"yeah Sunoo, they definitely have a crush on you, you're literally in their phonecase-" "OKAY JAKE LOOK IT'S YOUR PHOTOCARD. NOT SUNOO'S. I REPLACED IT. YOU HAPPY??"

Sunghoon . . .

Hates it lmao HATES IT. No. Absolutely not.

Grabs your phone and switches the photocard with his own in a matter of seconds. And you just stand there. Shocked.

Immediately realizes when the back of your phone looks different, spots the photocard and if it isn't his, he will switch it. Doesn't matter if he has to do it while you're in the bathroom, showering, eating, drinking water, or are literally holding the phone inside your hand. He will find a way to get that thing out of there.

When buying you an album he buys his own photocard separately so whenever you don't pull him he snatches the pc with another members face out of your hands and gives you his instead. Now you have a collection of Sunghoon's. Good for you!!

Sunoo . . .

Much like Heeseung, it's just a bit awkward for him. He doesn't say much, but deep down he's uncomfortable.

Does his stomach twist because he's jealous of Heeseung in your phonecase or because it's weird for him to look at his hyung doing a cute pouty face? Most definitely the latter. Shithead #2

Doesn't understand why you even like that pc, the aegyo is quote unqote "forced" and "not how Sunoo taught him" but whatever, he lets you have your fun. Plus he gets to tease Heeseung by randomly shoving your phone in front of his face and embarrassing him, so it's a win-win situation.

When you get tired of the pc and feel the need to switch things up, Sunoo suggests you get matching phonecases or take polaroids of each other and use those instead 'cuz if he has to look at another member doing aegyo he will snap-

Jungwon . . .

Jealous for suuuure, he is one jealous boy. Get ready for silent treatment 'cause mans did not come to play-

"Why is Sunghoon inside your phonecase? 🤨 Do you want attention from me or something? Is this your way of telling me you want me to spend more time with you??" "No... I just like the pc-" "😕 Okay then..."

That's when the silent treatment begins, pays you no mind at all. Even pretends you're invisible sometimes 'cause if you aren't doing this for his attention then, fine, he won't give you any at all!

Knows he's acting childish but still, he prefers this over verbal confrontation because it's more "subtle". Which it isn't, by the way. There is nothing subtle about the way his eyebrows furrow whenever he subconsciously looks at your phonecase.

Rushes towards you when you leave to empty your phonecase, holding a polaroid of you two together in his hands and telling you it would look better than that Sunghoon photocard.

Ni-ki . . .

Hates it pt.2 oh god he just dislikes it so much

Tells you straight away that the photocard looks "mad goofy inside your phonecase" and that it should be his, but you just ignore him 'cause he's being dramatic and Jake looks good in the picture

Unlike Jay, he has beef with that piece of paper. He will square up.

Whenever you leave your phone lying around with its screen facing the ground/couch/table/whatever you come back to riki glaring daggers at the pc. He just doesn't like it, it irks him.

Had a nightmare starring none other than your beloved Jake pc. After that he swore that thing was haunting him (it isn't, he just thinks about it a lot because it bothers him that you haven't switched to a ni-ki pc yet ☹️☹️)

"y/n, it is staring into my soul. Get rid of it"

Ends up burning it one night

©tyunni please do not copy, translate or repost my work.

taglist: @hyukaas @junityy @uygmoeb @sunghun @krewified @eternallyhyucks @pshjae @marknaeroni @feyregels @yyx2 @koishua @kac-chowsballs @echo-of-a-writer @w3bqrl @liz-riz @duolingofanaccount @goldenhypen @sungniverse @enhasimpeu @sieuneo @acciomylove @soobin-chois @anik-4 (bold means i can’t mention you, if you want to be a part of my taglist fill this out!!)

[freakygirlie]

Hi. Itk here. Believe me, don't, doesn't matter. Thought I'd drop (after you summoned ha) by given the chaos and try to enlighten the ones who choose to believe me, as much as I'm capable of.

The first thing I wanna say is: stop trying to figure out their relationship. You most likely never will. Fans are stuck on both extremes, when the actuality of it is far more in the middle (perhaps even up or down and all around ha). It's complex and strange and not at all "normal" (as normal as they could be, anyways).

It's not as simple as "oh they're just a closeted couple who engage in bearding and have kids and behind closed doors they're just a regular, old married couple and a big, happy rainbow family".

Doesn't sound like itk info, believe me, I get that but observing the fandom I'd say it almost is because most fans simply hang on extreme simplistic ideas of what their relationship is.

Second thing I'd like to say and unfortunately seems like it's not at all obvious but: do not believe anything they share publicly. Not saying they're lying compulsively, but they are public figures and they have a lot at stake to just casually drop the actual truth of any given situation.

Just don't. The same salt you have regarding itks, have towards them. It'd do you some good...Believe me. Unless you are involved in the entertainment or political life, you cannot even begin to fathom what it's really like, the level of manipulation, falsehood and well, overall deviation of it. It's quite disturbing tbh. So just always take whatever's said and shown with a good amount of salt. With public people hardly anything is accidental or casual.

I think the most prominent question now is...Why? Why would they do something like that? Regardless if you have the ingenuity to believe the little scene they made or not...Still, the question lingers.

With my level of "in the knowness" I cannot for sure say the real reason, yet from the pieces I've collected so far, seems to be a multiple gain scheme. It was a high risk, they were well aware, and it paid out in the way they were expecting, minus small bumps here and there. But overall it seemed to have worked in their favor. How in the hell, one would ask?

Believe me, I used my best sneaky capabilities to find out exactly why but they were smart enough to keep this one locked tight, minus a few loose lips. And from those all I've heard was that "whatever the purpose was, it worked out".

As weird as it may sound to the innocent mind, it's actually not at all, given that even leaked nudes are not at all leaked or accidental, and those tend to (at least in the past) get immense amount of backlash. It's not the first time famous folks fake a fight, surely won't be the last.

A lot goes into public image, it's not black and white as "well but it looked bad on Jensen", "it looked bad on the prequel", etc. You'd be surprised as how little this truly matters given the level of manipulation they are able to pull on the public. And well, even with them...It happens all the time. Both made mistakes far worse than just "not telling my bestie about my new project" and fans would eventually let that go and put them back on the pedestal.

So just remember, always: not in the industry? then don't judge anything because you simply do not understand how it works.

Another piece of itk information I can give besides "this was planned and it worked" is: they are fine. From what I've heard they are not fighting over it or going through anything more dramatic than what they usually have been going through ever since they met haha.

So just sit back and chill out. Breathe, read fanfiction and remember that we will never truly get answers, because even what comes out of their mouths are most of the time carefully thought out and directed to have a specific meaning and effect (why do you think Jared mumbles and rambles so much?).

Another interesting piece of itk: you know how they always say they never fight? Even though that sounds insanely hard to believe even if they were just friends because who knows someone for that long and is constantly together and never fights? Unlikely, right? Yes, as obvious as that was. But unfortunately a lot of you seem to believe that, given the level of shock you had for this little twitter feud (as fake as it was). Yeah. They fight. A lot.

They fight as much as individuals in their situation would. Like I said, not at all what most people absentmindedly seem to think it is. They go through a lot. Way more than anyone who isn't in a similar situation would understand. It's messy, although they try their best to make it simpler in the ways they can.

On top of being in a very complex situation, they both have strong personalities and one of them is quite hard to "pin down". So altercations happen a lot, but they know how to deal, and they are exceptionally good at making sure that doesn't interfere in their work (oh well, at least not any work that doesn't benefit from intense emotional exchanges, anyways 😉...chemistry isn't something random, you know? haha).

I find it quite...interesting (to put it nicely) that a lot of hats easily believe they are a couple that lies constantly about almost every aspect of their lives, yet, they cannot believe they would fake a social media narrative. It makes no sense whatsoever.

It'd do you all good to be a little less tendentious and look at them as, you know...Humans? They are not what they seem to be, just as you guys also take in different versions of yourselves in different situations, they do too. And don't be so hopelessly naive to actually believe they see fans as "hashtag family". This is their work. And as grateful as they are for supporters, they certainly do not consider them family. To the point of never lying and trusting you with their life.

I'm sure they love their fans, but come on, saying they would never lie because that's mean to fans is just beyond naive. They've been doing it all along and oh, another interesting info? They don't think they're doing anything wrong.

Yeah, sounds weird, you'd think they'd feel guilty. But again, unless you were media trained, you'd never get it.

From years now if there's one consistent info I've gotten was this: they don't feel obligated to tell you anything. They believe they are doing "what they are supposed to do, the right thing for everyone involved".

So. Yeah. And hell, they are right about not being obligated to say anything about anything, I guess.

Well, I hope that was helpful or at least entertaining. It's hard to share info without accidentally making it obvious who I am for the lurkers (sure you guys were well aware that they lurk around the fandom). But it's safe because as long as I don't provide evidence, I'm fine. Just walking a thin line between sharing and not sharing something too specific that would be easy fir them to know who has that info and although they can't do anything against itks, they can manage to cut us off somehow and I enjoy having access lol, so that'd be a bummer.

Anyways, take itks and J2 themselves with a ton of salt haha! You are lovely, btw, you seem very kind and I enjoy your blog very much! much love!

itk anon everything you said was <333 and i agree with like almost all of it. very nice analysis and ask thank you ! i don't always believe everything j2 put out but the whole stunt being a false narrative just seems wrong so idk what to make of it. regardless i myself can sometimes get carried away in my star-struck love of j2. and i am a tinhat so well :) and now they look to be really good and taking a break from here was well worth it <3

''You are lovely, btw, you seem very kind and I enjoy your blog very much! much love!'' i love u so much hope u have a great day !

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

[tw internalized aphobia]

hi!

i always felt good about my aroace identity. i always took a lot of pride in it and never struggled with it, but lately i’ve been thinking that it would’ve been better if i just identified as bisexual (i used the bi label before aro and ace). seeing some posts here really made me think that it would be just a lot simpler if i was in fact bi and not aroace.

i know that labels don’t have to be “old” to be legitimate, but i feel that some people online still see it that way? it makes me wish i was one of these labels that are seen as legitimate and real.

do you have any advice to deal with this internalized aphobia? i try to curate my online space as best of my ability but there’s always a voice in my head that keeps coming back saying it’d be better if i was bi instead.

sorry if this is too much information. your blog is a safe space for me i really appreciate your attention to answering asks and helping people. i hope your doing well 🤍

Yeah curating your online experience is definitely a good first step. Make sure you're also making good use of blacklisting options too. The more you see things that reinforce your internalized aphobia the harder it will be to work through that.

The other thing I'd recommend is go out of your way to regularly see and consume positive a-spec stuff. So that can be following blogs, which it sounds like you're already doing, but seeking out videos, checking out community, spaces, etc. I think it's especially really good to just see aces and aros talk about being ace and aro and talk about their own experiences.

Do you know any ace or aro people? Are you friends with any allies? If not, maybe consider joining an ace/aro discord server or something like that. So you have people you can talk to about being aroace.

If you're not already I'd also look into aroace media, there's more rep coming out all the time and some of it's really good. I've personally really enjoyed the Jughead 2015 run from Archie comics, Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger (YA Novel), and The Magnus Archives (Podcast) all of which have a-spec main characters. Alice Oseman is someone else to watch too, she's aroace and has a-spec characters throughout her works. Her book Loveless is specifically about an aroace college student coming to terms with her identity (this could be a bit raw if you're in a similar place), but if you're watching her current show Heartstoppers, Isaac is aroace as well and she's promised there'll be more a-spec content next season.

In general if you're not sure where to look for media, googling lists (such as books with ace characters, podcfasts with aro characters. etc) is usually a pretty effective way to find ace/aro media.

If you're comfortable with it another thing you can consider it pride stuff. If you don't want visible pride stuff around that will out you, maybe you can get a subtle pride art for your phone background or something like that.

Basically you want to connect with your identity, so not just see positive things about but also feel it.

Another thing you can do is some exercises to help yourself think differently. If you can identify the negative thought processes you're having about being aroace, or about it being better to be bi, you can consciously stop them and correct yourself.

So for example if you're thinking 'aroace is a newer coined label and people won't take it serously', you can stop and remind yourself that actually it's a term that has become very widely accepted in a short amount of time, including by most major lgbtq orgs. Or that the people who say that are jerks and their opinion on your identity doesn't really matter (or whatever resonates with you).

And you don't have to do more than that, just a gentle correction and move on with your day.

Another exercise that may help could be something like journaling, where once a week or something you like about the label aroace. So it could be listing things you like about being aroace, it could be things you like the community, things you like about the label itself, it doesn't matter. But that will help get you in the habit of thinking positive things or making positive associations with your label.

So generally speaking it takes time to unlearn internalized oppression. There's no flip you're going to switch and suddenly do better. But usually once you've identified it and you're making an effort, it will usually gradually get better. It's important to give yourself time though and be patient with the process.

All the best, Anon! Good luck!

[fqirycollective]

Introjects ≠ Their Source

Okay, what is an introject?

An introject is an alter in a DID, OSDD, UDD, or P-DID system that is based off a pre-existing thing. This "thing" is often called a source, or a mirror. Introjects form for a variety of reasons, but the easiest way to put it is that if a system consumes a media or something similar during times of trauma or stress, their brain may see that media as something that helps them through it. Because their brains sees them as a way to help them through it, it may split an introject of that thing in case something similar happens another time to help again. (I'm trying to make it really simple.)

If they're based off it, why aren't they their source?

For starters, they're only based off the part of their source their brain knows. They can't be something their brain doesn't know, so they can't be anything from their source that their brain doesn't know. This leads to when they split off and how far into their source the system has gotten to when they split off. But, in simpler terms, introjects are only their brain's interpretation of their source. They are not the literal person or fictional character sharing a body with someone (this is actually a common endo claim, which is misinformation). Also within the question at the top itself, "based off of" does not equal "the same as."

Main point of this post

The main point of this post is, if you know you have introjects of someone you dislike following you, make sure to specify you dislike their source and not them. Make sure they know that you don't hate them for things they did in source, and make sure they know you aren't talking about them. I don't expect this to get far outside system spaces, but I hope it does. It's perfectly fine to voice your opinion about a character and how you feel about them and their actions. It becomes a serious problem when you don't say it's the source, or when you start to attack introjects for what their source did.

Think of it this way. You share the same name as someone who did bad things, or is from a bad place without knowing it's bad. People who know about this start voicing their opinion about how bad you are and about how much they hate you. You don't even know them, but they hate you for what the person you share a name as did. They spread to many other people about how much they should hate you. But they're talking about the other person. But because you share a name, and it isn't specified it's not about you, you get the same backlash they do. It's not the exact same as introjects, but it's very similar.

What harm does it do?

For starters, it can cause a spiral of doubt, anger, self-worthlessness, etc. in the introject. It can make them start hating themselves due to what their source did, even if they had previously learned to forgive themself for source actions. And because of this, they may take a step back in healing as a system. We've said it before and we'll say it again, source separation is needed for healing. If an introject starts blaming themselves for source actions again, they may start to actually feel like their source. Because of this, their entire system is harmed. Also, think of the scenario from before. That doesn't sound very fun, now does it? It's very, very similar.

Our Experience

Luckily for us, we don't follow many of our sources or many fanpages. However, I (Beatrix) have had quite a few hardcore fangirls in our DMs who have been angry at me for what I did in source and who my character replaced in the adaptation. I'm a fictive of Beatrix from Fate: The Winx Saga. My source is..questionable, to put it kindly. I don't control who my source is, but many hardcore fans of the original series before the adaptation were really upset about my source existing and how she acted. I don't agree with my source's action, but I! Am! Not! Her! I blamed myself a lot after they blamed me. It hurt my self esteem quite a bit and it did a lot of harm to hear and read how much they hated me.

Take Away

Everyone is entitled to their opinions. However, it can do a lot of harm if introjects read hate about them and blame them for their source. General advice would be to fan accounts, and would be to make it clear that any introjects or people with D/A's reading what you're saying is that it's about their source and not them. I wish this would get out to more fandom accounts and that people would care, even about these stigmatized disorders. Unfortunately that's not the case, so the most I can do is hope that some people read and understand that it's better to blame the source and not introjects. It only harms us emotionally and system-ly. (Credits for post idea go to: @funtomphantom and the person who requested was: @caring.circle.)

[fandom-space-princess]

ooohhh would you mind sharing the reasons you don't like booktok? i have some reasons of my own but im really interested in the opinion who actually has to deal with the consequences of it all more directly. only if you want of course!

Oh goodness, grab your beach towel anon. Usually you'd have to go to the sea for this much salt.

(Prefacing this with the fact that this is just my opinion, not meant to be emblematic of like... booksellers as a whole, or my employer, or anything. It's also anecdata; nothing here is backed up by anything more than personal observation. I'm just a guy with a keyboard and an attitude. This also isn't meant to be a dig at anybody's taste in books/stories. I'm a supernatural blog, I have no legs to stand on in that regard.)

The things I most dislike about booktok, in no particular order:

1). The tendency toward quick consumption of stories without deeper or more lasting investment is an issue I have with a lot of media (see: Netflix dropping an entire series of something that everyone has watched, and then moved on from, in a week), but I think the problems inherent to that model of engagement become acute when the media in question is books. Novels are long-form storytelling by design; you're meant to sit with them for a while. Books in a series can take years, even decades, between publication. It's hard to convince people to engage with stories on that kind of timescale when we're constantly having our attention spans whittled away under a neverending barrage of buy-the-next-thing consumerism.

2). Tiktok is not only a principal motivator for this kind of behavior, it literally could not exist without it. Booktok doesn't encourage people to sit with books for a long time. It encourages you to *constantly* be consuming something new, *constantly* be pushing your friends to do the same, *constantly* be gaming the algorithm if you want to have any kind of significant presence. The environment does not encourage deep-dives; it leaves no time for contemplation. If you're participating in the culture as designed, you move through books very quickly.

From a business perspective (i.e. the capitalistic one), this is great. From the perspective of an indie bookseller, this is a pain in the ass on so many levels. Have you ever worked a retail Christmas rush? Where something you'd normally sell maybe three of in a year is suddenly The Hot Item, and the public demands you have 9000 of them in stock overnight?

It's unpleasant, is what I'm saying.

2b). The other thing this encourages? Stories that do not challenge people. Again, this is not to slander anyone's personal tastes. But ask yourself: what plays well to the greatest audience? What is most likely to draw customers, gain views, boost engagement? It isn't nuance. It isn't subtlety, isn't grappling with complex morality. All of those are things which I personally find intensely valuable about the experience of reading, and which I find pretty uniformly lacking in booktok's thing-of-the-week. This has an interesting overlap with the resurgence of censorship and purity culture that I think is worth examining, and maybe I'll rant about that some other time. As it stands, I find the trend toward Marvel-ification of fiction (simpler! louder! less nuance! more buzzwords!) to be obnoxious.

3). Speaking of buzzwords, the trend toward marketing new fiction using only a half-assed combination of tropes and comps drives me up a wall. I can't tell you how many ARCs I've seen in the last few months with bare-bones summaries and blurbs to the effect of "for fans of enemies-to-lovers and Game of Thrones, an endearing story of found family and the power of love!" Ok?? Fine in moderation, I guess, but even if I liked all of those things, what is in this book? Did the publisher not bother... asking the writer? Did they not leave them time to write a proper summary? Did they just not care, and hope replace a genuine marketing strategy with SEO?

Idk, maybe there's a benefit to this I can't see. Drives me absolutely bonkers, though.

4). The tags for my original post mentioned Colleen Hoover, who is the target of my ire at the moment because I've been pulling books for her fans all week, per point (2). No offense intended to Ms. Hoover, who I know nothing about but I'm sure is a perfectly normal author looking to get paid for her work, or even to her books, which are not my kind of thing but clearly are somebody's. FULL offense to Hachette for those books, though. They are everything I hate in paperback form: boring, ugly cover after boring, ugly cover. Really REALLY cheaply printed; about 1 in 3 arrive with some kind of damage, because they're so badly made that they don't hold up to even light jarring during shipping. The binding is... sad. Like. Even very bad books deserve better than this. But does the publisher care? Are they motivated to craft a higher quality product? Like hell they are! Because every booktok-er will buy them anyway. They're not interested in a product that will last; they're not looking for an object to cherish for life, a book to pick up and read over and over and over and over again until the spine cracks and the pages start falling out. That'll happen to these goddamn things by the second reread, but how many of them will get that reread is debatable, because by then I'll be selling that crowd The Next New Big Thing.

Anyway. I'll stop there. Thank you, anon, for your ask, and giving me a chance to vent a little bit. Wishing you a hot tea and a good, well-crafted story to liven up your day <3

[grey-eyed-menace]

Like A Dame (Snapshots)

Mammon: *trying his best at being casual* ...so, uh, why're you and Flower-Girl in suits?

Sora: *looking down at her watch in vague interest, frowning at the time* Diavolo provided our outfits for the evening, I complied, Mio guilt tripped Lucifer and Satan into providing a mishmash of their clothes.

Mammon: *visibly disappointed* Don't ya still have a bunch of leftover dresses from the other times?

Sora: And deal with Asmo's appraising glare? No thanks, I get enough flack from him as is about my lack of taste in fashion. I mean, fuck the rest of the Devildom, but I live with Asmodeus. I have to deal with that shit, I'm not Mio, I can't just zone out.

---------------------------------------------------

[Pan behind the refreshments where Leviathan, Mio, and Beel have decided to hide out for the night. The latter two of which are currently splitting what looks like to be an entire raspberry cheesecake, and the former seems to be playing a Gacha game on Mio's phone.]

(Luke stumbles upon them, wearing a rather pretty sailor dress, with his hair done up in pigtails. He puts his hands on hips, frowns cutely, and looks down on them in disappointment.)

Luke: Is this really how you spend every event? No variation?

Mio: *casually fork wrestling Beel away from her three claimed slices of cheesecake* Not every event, no. Sometimes, Belphie or Satan join us, other times Levi and I shack up in the coat room, or Beel decides too safeguard the entire refreshment table. There's plenty of variation.

Luke: That's not what I meant and you know it.

Mio: And you're hiding from Phenex, aren't you?

[In the distance, a rather high pitched call of 'Luke!' can be heard as an incredibly pretty female looking aqua haired demon traverses the dance floor.]

Luke: ...*sighs* Can you slide over?

------------------------------------

Sora: So that was Marchosias?

Satan: Yes, unfortunately, it seems she's not incredibly fond of you.

Sora: *blinks stupidly* Not fond? She's my lab partner. If anything, she loves me. It's just... Well, I'm hanging out with the guys she kind of... You know, followed into hell? It's awkward dude. Like... I think I've seen her vault out a six story building just to avoid Beel.

Satan: Truly?

Sora: *shrugs* Hey, a large majority of people avoid their family like the plague, others try to stay connected, and some, like Phenex, decide that they're gonna be said families problem. Whether they like it or not.

Satan: And you? What's your category?

Sora: *without so much as pausing to think* Reluctant orphan adoptee with five siblings, three cousins, and a really fucking weird extended family.

------------------------------------

Solomon: Ah, Diana!

[Solomon rushes over to his old student with a bright smile, clad in a black form fitting dress with white accents, paired with a gold sash, and silver heels. He also, rather inexplicably, has a rather modest set of breasts.]

(Diana, by comparison, is dressed in a rather oversized midnight blue tux with a grey bowtie, and a white sash around her hips, a large spade sewn over her heart.)

Diana: *blinks tiredly, presses a hand to her face, and sighs, preparing herself for an oncoming clusterfuck* Yes Solomon?

Solomon: *grin persisting* I'm calling in a favor, I need you to help me with something.

Diana: *closes eyes, breaths in, and then exhales* ...next time, next time, I'm taking Bridget and Eirny up on that fourth honey moon.

------------------------------------

Spade: Has anyone ever told you that you're infuriating?

Phenex: *humming as they drag him around the dance floor* Constantly, you?

Spade: Only my children.

------------------------------------

[As the party begins to wind down, Mio has decided to briefly venture out from behind the refreshments table, only to come upon a staring contest between Phenex and Simeon.]

(Simeon looks incredibly uncomfortable. Phenex is simply Smiling, it's not a pretty smile, no, it's the smile that got Diavolo to back down from including them and Luke in the butler fiasco.)

Mio: ...do I want to know?

Simeon: *still uneasily meeting Phenex's gaze* No.

Phenex: *still Smiling* It's just drama between siblings, you understand don't you Mio-chan?

(Mio raises an eyebrow at Simeon, then turns to Phenex, and back to Simeon, before casting her gaze to where Luke and the others were at before sighing.)

Mio: Right, uh, well, I'll be leaving then, see you guys at R.A.D. tomorrow, I suppose.

(Mio proceeds to speed walk back to where Beel, Levi, and Luke are without a second thought.)

------------------------------------

[By way of an escaped Lucifer, the Ubuyashiki-Shibata cousins are currently dancing with one another.]

(Mio is leaning against Sora's shoulder, as the latter leads her through the steps of a butchered slow waltz.)

Mio: How's day been so far? Well, I know mine hasn't been the best, Levi stole the last cupcake.

Sora: *sighing* I see you've been dreadfully bored.

Mio: Bored doesn't begin to cover it, I miss the more... Nerve wracking events!

Sora: Mio, we nearly die everytime those events happen.

Mio: Not always! Sometimes I get lucky! I got to hold Mammon's hand during that room by room puzzle!

Sora: ...Lord above *pointedly ignoring the scandalized gasps from passing demons* you two are pathetic.

------------------------------------

[After what seems to be an eternity, Diana and Spade join together on the dance floor.]

(Sora and Asmo watch from by the refreshments opposite to the one Beel, Levi, and Mio are hiding behind, Diana and Spade gliding right by them, completely ignorant of their presence, only focused on one another.)

Sora: *eyes following them* Please tell me you feel like your intruding, please, I don't want to feel alone.

Asmo: *humming, already going about fixing Sora's bun* I don't know why you're hoping to find solidarity with me Sora, I mean, it's cute, but honestly? This just excites me. To see something so intimate and gentle... Ah, it makes me ache for simpler times.

Sora: *whimpers*

Asmo: *pats her shoulder reassuringly*

------------------------------------

[It's the last dance of the night, and the Ubuyashiki-Shibata cousins are each dancing with their own prospective partners completely stone-faced.]

(Sora, dressed in a silver suit and black tie, with her hair up in a braided bun reminiscent of Arturia Pendragon, is dancing with Mammon.

Mio, by comparison, dancing with Belphie, and therefore helping support him, is dressed in an odd mishmash of Lucifer, Asmo, and Satan's clothes. A pair of navy blue slacks, a black dress shirt, dark pink tie and white blazer. Her hair is gathered into a short ponytail at the base of her skull, tied off with a red ribbon. Asmo is distinctly glaring at her from where he's dancing with Diana.)

Mammon: What's got you pissed off Girlie?

Sora: *still completely stone-faced* Fate, the world, Phenex's continued existence, an array of things. Most glaringly, perhaps it's the fact that you couldn't ask my cousin to dance so you stole me away from Beel and Belphie?

Mammon: *clears throat, as Sora leads him into an awkward dip* ...right, got me there Girlie.

(Across the floor, Belphie stirs enough to ask a question.)

Belphie: Why're you so stiff? Actually, why aren't you Sora, and where is Beel?

Mio: *pointedly smiling at Asmo as he passes by with Diana before answering* Mammon's a coward, and Lady Rose is genuinely convinced I'm a man.

Belphie: *already drifting off again* Got it...

------------------------------------

[After the ball ends, the brothers and the Ubuyashiki-Shibata cousins proceed with the trek home.]

(Beel has taken to supporting Belphie with his left arm, while Sora, on his right, proceeds to routinely supply him with snacks.

Mio has taken to trying to convince Levi to give her phone back before they arrive at the House of Lamentation, while riding on Mammon's back piggy back style, grin plastered on her face, with Levi arguing hotly about being in the middle of raid on a mobile dungeon game of some sort.

Asmo is on Mammon's left side, mumbling obscenities about Mio's fashion choices.

Meanwhile, Satan and Lucifer are at the back of the pack quietly bickering about something or other.

Phenex, as usual, is stocking the poor 'family' of nine from the shadows.)

Sora: It was a good night, you know.

Beel: *chewing around a candy bar of some sort, and shifting Belphie's weight slightly* Yeah, it kinda was, wish there was more food at the refreshments table though, it was good.

Sora: Meh, I'll take your word for it, all I had was some of that Blood Punch, which... Yeah, not really for me, I think Solomon spiked it with something for the lesser demons.

Beel: Is that why Diana looked like she wanted to drop dead every time Diavolo came by for a drink?

Sora: Mmh, that and I think it was because she was forced to dance with Phenex for most of the night, she and Mister Spade only danced once, even if lasted the rest of the night.

(They silent the rest of the way to the House of Lamentation. At which, they all separate, undress, and promptly pass out, well, except for Levi, who remains with Mio's phone held hostage well until early morning.)

------------------------------------

[The next morning, the household is rather groggy as they make their way down to breakfast.]

Mammon: Last night must 'ave been something else, my feet freakin' hurt.

Beel: You're one to talk, I feel like my ankles are planning a mutiny.

Mio: I woke up in a binder, guys, a binder. What the hell? I thought I wasn't going to be the Dame!

Sora: At least you didn't feel like you were suffocating the entire night, my chest still feels like it's about to cave in, fucking hell...

Levi: *shrugs* I'm actually fine with whatever happened.

Belphie: *head thunks against the table*

(Several moments later, there's an array of notifications from Asmo's phone. Loud shrill beeps are all that make up the next two or so minutes.)

Lucifer: *sighs* ...It seems I forgot about the social media ban, lovely.