#🙃 I hate anxiety | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sshaw0l · 5 months

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my friends have gone a weekend holiday without me and I’m trying to not be upset about it but idk I’m feeling kind of meh

#I was invited but I declined bc of cost and also bc I don’t want to go to that particular place #(I’ve had opportunities in the past with college trips etc)#however instead of trying to arrange to go somewhere I could join they’ve just decided to go anyway #which is also fine like they’re allowed to do stuff without me #but I feel kind of left out because we’ve always talked about going on a trip together #and now the first time it’s happening I’m not there #also between you and me I always felt like they didn’t get along with each other as much as they did with me #ALSO I have such a hard time trying to get them both to hang out with me anyway #and now they’ve booked flights/hotels with less than a month notice?!#I haven’t said anything to them about it but I haven’t been speaking to them much either I’ve been kind of depressed the last 3 months #and then I caught a horrible cold too #idk Reddit am I the asshole?#so now I’m spiralling thinking #that they don’t like me or they don’t wanna spend time with me and that they’re finally fed up with me #either way I am stressed and now I’m scared to speak to them altogether #🙃 I hate anxiety

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samyelbanette · 2 months

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I hate the proliferation of Discord in modern fandom. The idea that people are having all these fun conversations without me is so isolating.

#at the same time. I’ve never been a part of a fandom Discord server #and the idea of having to learn the social rules of a new community absolutely terrifies me as an autistic person #that’s why I don’t have a Twitter account either #I’ve been on Tumblr for 10 years and I hate change and I hate trying new things #(not that anyone has ever invited me anyway 🙃)#my anxiety will think the stupidest things like:#your fandom probably talks for hours about how stupid you are #and you will never catch them making fun of you because you’re not on that website #(yes i can hear exactly how ridiculous that sounds)

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harlequinoccult · 1 month

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So I just got fired from my job,

#🙃#can i catch a break. for like one fucking second.#because i had to call in 6 times in a year and hr didn't accept the documentation for the 7th time.#delete later #i hate it when my fucking anxiety is right when it says something will go wrong #like can you stfu you stupid ass bitch. damn.

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bunnihearted · 1 month

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umm

#i havent had this bad anxiety in like 10 years wth #i have a dentist appt. and it's only a checkup thingy there will be no treatment done #it should be short and quick but im so anxious #im also anxious bc there's almost aways issues w financial aid and stuff 🙃#and a checkup is almost $100 which is 1/3 of my monthly budget 💀#so that's the main part that worries me. plus everyone in a dentist's office are so rude </3 #i've tried asking her several times but she is so unclear... i hope i can get like an invoice/bill thing #but yeah everyone are so rude about it and it's just a whole ordeal #so im so anxious for this appt omg #im like shaking a little and my breath feels caught in my chest lol #i dont wanna go but if i dont go now i'll have to pay a fee which is also expensive so like #i have to go but i dont wanna i just wanna cryyyyyy #update: no i did not get an invoice #she was really rude too T-T acting like i was gonna run away and not pay #so yehh... $140 gone from my accountttt i did not think it would cost that much #so .. ummmm #i hope my financial aid worker will reply soon #and i mean omg i hope they will grant me financial aid #otherwise.... i wish i had neven gone wtffff #everyone told me it'd work and this was ok but like ???#i just hope she replies today or tmrw so i can know #if i have to have given up that mych money then #i wont be able to buy buss tickets to the animal park i wanna go to #or buy those clothes i was gnna buy #or have food the entire month lmao #but i just wanna know what im dealing w i hate not knowing

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imwritesometimes · 18 days

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Have I mentioned I hate summer lately?

#it's 3am. santino just threw up a hairball & a bug 😑#woke up to the tell tale sounds of hairball. went to clean it up. worse. I hate summer I hate bugs I hate heat I hate insomnia in the heat #I hate having to take aleve pms every night I hate that I'm awake rn I hate that I wanna cry and have a bad anxiety depresh spiral #I hate everything abt summer bro all of it fuck off nuke the sun I'm so done it's only the beginning of june #103° fuckin degrees today. it's 3am. my ac JUST kicked on. bug vomit. I wanna sleep until late october #and I have no one to vent to at 3am so I'm here 🙃#erin explains it all

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c28hunter · 5 months

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#nothing is better than an anxiety attack triggered by a fancy coffee shop 🙃#yeiks why am i lik this?#i don't fit in such fancy looking space #i don't fit in the fucking public space i should hide somewhere and never be seen by people #i take up too much space #i am too much i can't be here i want to hide somewhere but i fucking can't #i hate my brain so much #eryka vents

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demadogs · 1 month

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sooo how long after crashing your car do you feel normal again emotionally… how many business days.

#had a full blown panic attack last night imagining me crashing and killing someone #tried hugging a pillow pet that my best friend gave me ans then i thought about crashing and killing her #hugged my cats and thought about accidentally killing them #i barely hurt anyone but i cannot stop thinking what if i did #i HATE that giant death machines are my only mode of transportation i dont live in a city and im an event photographer i HAVE to drive again #and im so pissed about it #i didnt even START driving regularly until like 4 months ago i had genuinely debilitating driving anxiety for years and years #and i fear its back!!!!!! 🙃🙃🙃#everybody i talked to keeps being like ‘accidents happen all the time’ SO IS IT GONNA HAPPEN AGAIN????

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zevrans · 8 months

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#job's been sucking life out life out of me and it's getting harder and harder to go there and do the amount #of work that you know you're getting very underpaid for but you have no choice at the moment too so. 🥴🥴🥴#i hate this job at this point i can not imagine how people work their whole life on one job they hate they are so strong in every way #meanwhile my mental health is crumbling each shift i take haah 🙃#it wasn't good to begin with but my anxiety now is just a whole new level #i NEED to record on my phone the moment i lock the entry doors at the end of my shift #and i try to memorize the sound of the key turning in the keyhole as if video record isn't enough #i feel like my ocd is resurfacing badly i thought i had it more or less under control before i took the job #how wrong i was 😭😭😭#i just want to snuggle in bed and not leave the house for at least a week or two just to revitalize my social battery and will to #interact with people irl 🤡#okay one good moment tho there was a girl so beautiful today 🥺 that i couldn't keep it to myself and said to her how beautiful she was 🙈#and she said i was too 😭 i legit felt so shy to look at her that pretty she was and she had a cool neck tattoo 😳🥺#moments like these help me get through the day 😭#tbd

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agathabridgerton · 5 months

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#probably have to change meds 🙃#idk i think i’m just a pessimist bc i always just assume that trying another med is a dead end #and that the side effects will probably be worse than whatever i’m experiencing now #but i’m also such a terrible judge of these things bc i’ve spent my whole life suffering bc of incurable disabilities #hard to stay hopeful with all that #just a month ago i was trying to address my anxiety :(#and my gastritis wasn’t an issue #and my other things weren’t issues #now my anxiety is at an all time high i have a bunch of side effects from the epilepsy meds #and i think my gastritis is flaring up #like god i can’t keep doing this i feel!!!! i keep trying to hope for better and dreaming of better #but i hate this suffering and i feel like no one has confidence that i can achieve my dreams #i love my parents and they love me but i don’t think they really think i can do it. be successful as a screenwriter #and i know that it’s the mood swings but how many times can i watch my life is murder how many times.#how long will popping on an episode every time i get anxious work? how long until i get better #rambling #anyways. sigh. life sucks rn for me what’s new

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gentlemanbutch · 7 months

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I am having the most intense stress-induced flare up of whatever chronic illnesses I have and I would very much like it to stop

#I am fairly positive I have mcas on top of eds which I already kind of assumed but everything about this flare screams mcas to me #everything hurts but also I’m having weird allergy symptoms that are making me anxious I’m sick but like #I don’t feel sick and also I’ve had extremely minimal contact with anyone and I would know if I were sick #my throat itches so much I hate it #I also hate not being diagnosed because it’s hard to know what to do during flares #and it’s hard to calm my anxiety down and say oh yeah this is just a flare #instead my brain jumps to omg you have an infection and you’re going to get extremely sick and also infect other people #fun 🙃#anyway I thought I had pots for a while but those symptoms were never consistent and after reading a lot more about mcas #I wonder if maybe my cardiac stuff is just part of mcas. I don’t know #anyway #mcas #mast cell activation syndrome #ehlers danlos syndrome #eds #chronic illness #chronically ill #undiagnosed

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unreadpoppy · 6 months

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🌟i hate anxiety so much 🌟

#something that i hate that happens a lot is #i'll see a post that is most definetly NOT ABOUT ME #but then #some of the things written are either things i've done or intend on doing #and bc of how some things are phrase #the post runs free in my mind #and then anxiety picks it up and starts going #“oh you're bad for doing this they're clearly talking about you”#and it's...aaaa #now i wanna change a whole thing i had written 🙃#bc of a post i saw which again HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME #but this bitch ass anxiety does this #and i'm so tired #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #and like #it makes me go like oh this is shit i'm just gonna scratch the whole thing away #but then the other side of my brain isi like who cares #but also aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #i'll try to go to sleep but i make no promises

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rosicheeks · 11 months

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???

#literally just laying in bed and I’m getting hit HARD with anxiety #broooo what the actual fuck #I hate feeling anxious for no reason #where’s the meme where the person is talking to their brain and is like ‘can you be happy’ and it’s like ‘no’ 🙃#I don’t think those are the actual words #I have a few memes in my head right now haha #wish I could just ya know wake up and not get overwhelmed by anxiety #that would be cool #shut up rosie

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strangefable · 1 year

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tumblr has broken an xkit feature and it's causing me some serious anxiety 🙃 i'm gonna take a break and come back to catch up on tags in a bit

#my brain is not happy give it back i need the reassurance #sorry for spamming incoherently the last hour or two #i just needed to decompress and then i noticed this broken feature and now i'm not okay 🙃#promise i will catch up on tags soon! <3 #i just need to walk away for a little before i have a minor anxiety attack 🙃#truly i hate my own brain almost as much as it hates me #🙃🙃🙃

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running-in-the-dark · 2 years

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oh my god I'm so glad we have already found a new apartment

our downstairs neighbour just talked to me! (I'm pretty sure it was on purpose that she did it now, she'd have known my partner is at work...)

she was so fucking angry. because my partner didn't clean the wheelie bin (twice!). and because - according to her - he didn't clean the staircase at all two weeks ago when it was our turn, and instead did it last week. which is just not true at all? he did do it, I saw the used rag and everything. and she yelled at him then too, so he went back and cleaned it again.

and he told me that he asked her what the problem is exactly (so that he can do it the way she wants it) and she said 'there's dirt' and refused to say more. which is completely unhelpful when you don't see the dirt (she showed it to me, I did not see it at all).

but to me, she said 'why doesn't he just ask??' and I was like is that a joke. he literally did that on several occasions and you said you don't want to say, he just needs to do better.

I was so pissed off, I didn't just stand there and take it like my partner does. which tbh just seemed to make her angrier (at first) lol. but I said we're moving out next month, partly because of her constantly yelling at us. 'me? yelling? that's not true' lol yeah you're literally doing it right now. and she said she talked to our landlord - I said yeah, she told us and said she thinks it's super childish of you to complain about that to her (probably shouldn't have said that but whatever, we're almost out of here, I don't give a fuck anymore).

the other neighbour had her door open and was just silently standing there the entire time, it was a bit weird.

she also said she's lived here for 40 years and it's never happened that someone is this bad and doesn't stick to the cleaning schedule. and I'm like... dude is this your only problem? this is the thing that makes us awful neighbours apparently?! not fucking cleaning the wheelie bin every fucking time we put it out (it's October!!! she said something about doing it in summer!! we don't know anyone who does that regularly AT ALL!!), and maybe messing up when cleaning the staircase? there were cobwebs one time and she lost. her. mind.

I cannot comprehend something this small and petty being your biggest problem. we are literally SO quiet. we don't do anything annoying. we don't have parties. we don't have screaming children. we're nice and polite. but no apparently we're awful. she was also really mad that my partner doesn't say much/anything when she yells at him. and I said '... he's scared when people yell at him??' and she just wouldn't accept it (this is literally the biggest problem in our relationship, he shuts down when there's ANY conflict, even when you're completely calm, so yeah bitch you can fucking believe it when I say that!!).

she did eventually stop yelling when I kept telling her it's fucking unnecessary to be so angry about this and that she can say this shit in a friendly way. lol. apparently she's not used to people not being scared of her (I get that, she's terrifying tbh. but I'm fucking done with her bullshit :) )

anyway, it really sucked, and she also woke me up so I was a mess and very confused. but! my anxiety meds are definitely doing something (even though they're not working perfectly anymore) because I'm just angry and annoyed, not scared. no panic attack yet. so that's good.

#dude my partner is so upset about this. I told him what happened and he called me and was close to crying because she's so scared of her #but nooo he's a man and he looks big and intimidating so there's no way he could be scared 🙃 fuck off.#*he's #and also - she said awful things about the previous tenant (a student)#so... we're the worst but he was also bad? but this has never happened before? yeah that totally makes sense #all the complaints she had about him were about him not cleaning enough #sooo yeah maybe it's not everyone else that's the problem and you're just insane 🙃#who the fuck cares if there's miniscule traces of dust in the fucking stairway??? you don't use that for anything but walking through it??#I really hate women of that generation and... social class? something like that. I'm sorry you have no control in your life and need to let #it out this way but damn dude leave me the fuck alone #(she also said she gets it if my partner doesn't know how to clean because he's a man.... no he just never had to clean before. it has #nothing at all to do with him being a man)#personal #anxiety meds my beloved

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dreams-in-daylight · 2 years

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Quick question, are there clothes dryer machines that use an open flame heating element? Should I be seeing flames behind a little square access door???

#I feel like that wouldn’t be a thing bc fire hazard #but bae and rando neighbor aren’t sure #not the dryer on our floor so bae and I aren’t familiar w it???#bae says there’s a gas line to the dryer #but I’m having serious trouble believing someone would design a dryer like that #hopefully person using dryer comes back real soon #anxiety is going nuts of course #hate non-contained fires #hate loud fire alarms #mood swing went south hella quick #eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhh #🙃🙃🙃

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emometalhead · 1 year

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Made an appointment with a doctor to discuss my anxiety and possibly get medication!!

#I've been too anxious to try to get meds for my anxiety which is a fun irony 🙃#finally got up the courage to suggest to my mom that I want anxiety meds #she's mentioned before that it would probably be helpful to me and that she'd take me to the doctor for it #the appointment isn't for another month but this feels like a good step #I hate doctors though. I'm so stressed but it'll be worth it #I just hope I don't have to do like a physical and stuff #I'm also worried because I know they'll weigh me and I've been trying so hard not to fixate on my weight so that might lead to bad thoughts #ugh #this was supposed to be a happy post #sorry yes #I'm looking forward to hopefully being able to better manage my anxiety or at least being able to regulate my heart rate so I'm less shakey #this has been such a long time coming #I've been thinking a lot about therapy lately and I'm definitely not stable enough for that yet so baby steps #ashley rambles

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