#💭... the saint
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#💭... the saint#literally me#girlblogging#girl blogger#girlblogger#coquette#dollette#manic pixie dream girl#girlhood#this is what makes us girls#nymph3t#just girly thoughts#morute#creepy cute#morute aesthetic#gloomy coquette#gloomcore#ghostcore#ethereal#dollcore#dollete#living doll#weird girl#unreality#lamb#sheep#angelcore#heavencore#holycore
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deeply glad that Anthony and Kate fucked off to do their thing and weren't their for Lady Whistledown reveal because if they'd been their the show runners would have also made them react in a way that is so Out of Character for the sake of whitewashing Penelope and getting their unearned pay off and it's fr so unrealistic that she wrote the nastiest shit about everyone and was not shunned 😭😭😭 like what happened to stakes and consequences
#like loves peneloise down bad in s1 and s2 and was looking forward to their reconciliation but it also felt so rushed and unearned#like the writing was saur bad this season#anthony bridgerton#kate bridgerton#anti penelope featherington#anti polin#the writers should have tried on redemption arc route for Pen instead of acting like she did no wrong & every1 else is just overreacting#not a pen hater but the way most of her fans paint her as a saint pisses me off so much#this season could have been good but everything feels like a downgrade from last two seasons#from costuming to makeup to cinematography to the quality of writing#like dont get me started when subplots didnt get their ending and were left hanging#ugh i have so many thoughts#kanthony#bridgerton season 3#💭
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Okay I reread poyt 3 and actually Steve is psychotic. If I had written poyt now, I would’ve had her leave his ass for intentionally cheating on her and telling her about it and saying it was all her fault. Like that’s some dark DARK shit. Idk what 22 year old me was thinking with that like WHAT THE FUCK????
#lowkey cannot believe I wrote that#like…. that’s insane#how was he EVER redeemable after that#he makes wg!Ari and wg!Steve look like SAINTS#I really heard ‘dark fic’ and RAN with it damn#my thoughts 💭
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I FUICKING MISSED PUPPY DAY ANYWAY HAPPY PUPPY DAY TI THE MOST DOG CODED F/OS
#jay's bullshit#I'm allowed to call my brother and farther puppy coded because I'm write#RIGHT#Speedwagon is like. a giant Saint Bernard. with a greying snout. to me. i love him dearly#i got the Joseph and Speedy pics from Pinterest sorry#ch.: 🍖#ch.: ⚡#ch.: 🕸️#ch.: 🌱#ch.: 💭#ch.: 🎩#ch.: 🌂
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just learned how to crochet. I feel like a grandma
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We Found Love
charles leclerc x female reader (smau) 1/2
summary: you and charles were meant to be together even if the media, society and his girlfriend criticized you.
trope: childhood friends to lovers, ferrari driver x head strategist , mean gf (no hate to any of charles' gf's, ex or current.)
a/n: i know i know im the worst updater and writer ever (I'm sorry okay 😭 I'm busy and I lose motivation lol)but im back slowly but surely, and this is so new! My first F1 fic aahh :D This is very small, I just needed to get this out (monza took my heart away!) hope y'all like it hehe xx.
Months before MONZA
ursernames
life lately - enjoying the break before it's Monza ❤️🔥🌷🌺🌠🪽🥨🍽️🪡⌨️👠💎
iked by charles_leclerc,mlnmarta, and 1M others
lewishamilton looks like someone had fun!
⤷ ursernames obviously mate 🧉!!
charles_leclerc wannabe artistic ass 😘😻🤡
⤷ ursernames shut up donkey 🐴🫏😊
kikagomez 💫💗
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@Ynniequeenn
I'm surprised Charles isn't spending the vacay with her. Sounds fishy but they still act close 😕. I don't know man.
⤷ @chrshls: people like you suck! get a life.
charles_leclerc
everything is good 🩵
liked by alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris, ursername and 4M others
joristrouche amazing!
ursernames leooo awwww
liked by author
pierregasly simba and leo meetup soon? 😂
⤷ charles_leclerc soon!
alexandrasaintmleux amores <3
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ursernames
thank you for the wishes everyone, just took another lap around the earth 🌍 🌷🌺🩵
liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz and 5M others.
formula_1 happy birthday to the best-ever strategist!
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scuderiaferrari buon compleanno stargirl!
⤷ ursernames grazie mille!
charles_leclerc joyeux anniversaire ma meilleure fille
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mlnmarta joyeux anniversaire ma soeur
⤷ usernames 💞💞
oscarpiastri have a great day old lady 🥳
⤷ ursername when i catch you oscar when i bloody catch you! 😵😵
f1wags&insiders
BREAKING 🚨 Charles Leclerc and Alexandra Saint Mluex were fighting at a party! Apparently, it was the same birthday party held for Y/N's 27th birthday. What are your thoughts 💭?
liked by 40K others
alexfp i just can't stand this anymore! It's clear that something's up with charles 😐
leclecice bro, alex is straight up toxic just admit it she is NOT a paddock queen neither the IT wag ughh 🥱🥱
lestappenfpp time for charles WDC lesgoo
ynstan will charles and yn ever date? they have that CHEMISTRY yk
malenalexx it's definitely something to do with charles
⤷ unknownchaaa smartest alex fan..
ynstrategyss literally how crazy can Alex even get until they fuck up yns birthday party?! seriously i lost my respect for her.
alexandrasaintmluex
🌺🌺 floral vibes 🌺🌺
liked by joristrouche and 100K others
alexfp omg our queen 👑!!
foralexa hi alexx i hope you're doing well ❤️🩹 you look gorgeous btw 🤩
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kikagomez 💫😵⭐
rebeccadonaldson literally so pretty 🌺🌺
⤷ alexandrasaintmluex says the prettiest!
charlesfanpage charles not in the likes? sus.
leclecicecreammm someone's tryna churn content asap b4 the breakup LOLL
⤷ alexandrasaintmluex you're hilarious. 🥱
ynstrategyss hope y'all okay...
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
2 weeks before Monza, at the Ferrari HQ
"Hey, can we talk, please?" Charles asked Yn as the meeting begun to wrap up.
"What do you want, Charles? Does making me look like a fool on my birthday not enough?!" You said very honestly.
"No,no, mon cher, listen to me."
"I'm sorry for whatever Alex caused during your birthday party. I wanted the party to be nice and surrounded by your close friend's and family. I'm regretful I chose to bring Alex as a tag along. She wanted to go and I can't say no anyways."
"What's your point, Charles? I'm tired of this drama. I am." You said,
"Yn, we've been friends since so young, we spent almost every day with eachother, basically inseparable. Maman practically consideres you her the daughter she never had and you're really close to my family and brothers. Even with my exes you had a close bond with them."
"Mhm, that's right I loved your exes." You said slightly smiling,
"Ever since I dated Alex, she.... she liked fame and attention. Even if she didn't show it much. And when she saw us being close and basically just friends, she got mad and jealous. I didn't realise much until you told me when she confronted you."
"She reads a lot of the news, tweets and those tiktok edits of us that is all over social media. She is influenced by them. And I honestly don't get how they consider our bond romantic but not platonic."
"Alex has been fighting a lot with me past few months. We are not close, anymore. Not liked we used to be. She's constantly screaming and I can't stand her anymore."
"Mon ange, whatever happens with you and her, please... just tell me. I saw the texts she sent you and it wasn't pleasant. Why have you been keeping this a secret. Please ange, don't do it anymore."
"I don't know how longer I can sustain this relationship if it continues to be as toxic as this." Charles said earning a pout from you.
" Charlie, I wanted to see you happy with Alex. I'm sorry about what's been happening at home. I'm sorry too.." you said,
" Are we good?"
"Yeah we are, Charlie" you said, earning a tight hug from you best friend.
It's undeniable that you've always liked Charles. He was handsome, he was everything a women could've dreamt of. And obviously you're one of them. You'd never had the chance to confess and you think you'd never will. It's better to blossom a good, sustainable friendship rather than risking it all for a relationship. Your a simple person, you're critical and realistic.
When Alex confronted you about your relationship with Charles, it hit you till the pit of your heart. You begun thinking if you were too clingy or romantic with Charles. You begun distancing yourself from him thinking you were at fault. You did not want to be a homewrecker,ever.
Although Charles confrontation settled a little of your thoughts, you cannot deny the growing feelings for Charles in that heart of yours.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
charles_leclerc
P4. Deluso ma abbiamo dato tutto. Grazie a tutti voi per esserci sempre. E domani, andiamoooooo 😍
liked by carlossainz,oscarpiastri, ursername and 3M others
ursername let's get it ✨✨
speedingcharles we counting on u buddy
anthoinetrouchet let's get it ittttttttt aaa
alexandrasaintmluex 💕
ursername
story, 1hr ago
feels great to back in monza! hoping to make tifosi's proud this weekend 🇮🇹 Let's see what we can do with a P4 and P5.
RACE DAY IN MONZA.
⭐⭐⭐
@F1LiveUpdates:
"Lights out at Monza! Charles Leclerc is in the fight for P1, but all eyes are on Ferrari’s strategy today. Y/N calling the shots 👀 #Monza #CharlesLeclerc #Ferrari"
@LeclercFans:
"Y/N on the pit wall, looking like a boss. Monza is hers to win 🔥 #YN #FerrariFam"
Your heart raced as you watched the battle unfold in front of your eyes. Charles was in second, fighting tooth and nail to close the gap on the leader. Your freshly manicured nails hovered over the radio button, ready to call the next move.
The crowd roared in the background, but your focus was razor-sharp. Charles trusted your instincts, and you wasn’t about to let him down.
Y/N (over radio):
"Box, box. Let’s go for the undercut."
Charles
"Copy. Trusting you on this."
The team jumped into action as Charles pitted. Y/N watched with bated breath, hoping the strategy would pay off.
As Charles emerged from the pits, your hands clenched into a fist. The timing was perfect. They had nailed it. It will take time to pass through lando but it'll be worth it. And you knew it.
Y/N (over radio):
"P1. 35 laps ahead. Now hold it. You’ve got this."
The crowd was deafening as the final lap approached. You stood with her arms crossed, staring at the screens, barely blinking. Charles had a three-second lead, but the pressure was immense. Your heart pounded in time with the roar of the engines.
Y/N (over radio):
"Last lap, Charles. Bring it home."
You held her breath as the checkered flag waved and the roar from the grandstands signaled what you'd hoped for.
Charles (over radio):
"We did it! P1! We won, Y/N!"
Bryan (over radio)
"AND P1!"
@F1Live:
"Leclerc takes P1 at Monza! What a race! Ferrari fans are going wild! #CharlesLeclerc #Monza"
@FerrariFans:
"Y/N’s strategy today was perfection. Absolute genius. 🔥 #TeamYN #Ferrari"
@LeclercNation:
"Y/N hugging Charles after that win? Yeah, there’s something there. No one can convince me otherwise. #CharlesAndYN"
charles_leclerc
Siete i numeri 1, Forza Ferrari ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
liked by ursername,alexandrasaintmluex, lewishamilton and 10M others
ursername congrats charliee <3
liked by author
⤷ charles_leclerc couldn't done it without you, yn 😘
formula_1 tifosi's pride and joy
lewishamilton enjoy the win mate! great job
oscarpiastri congrats charles!
pascale_leclerc my boy
liked by author
⤷charles_leclerc i didnt leave you at the gransdstands this time 😂
ursername
story, 2h ago
FEVER DREAM!! GRAZIE GRAZIE TUTTI MILLE!
@LeclercNation:
"Alexandra needs to chill. Y/N is just doing her job. She’s a strategist, not a homewrecker! #TeamYN"
formula_1
leo meets his papa who just won the italian grand prix! lovely family at sight 🐕🐶🐾
liked by mlnmarta,alexandrasaintmluex and 2M others
alexfp ahh the cutiess, though she wasn't here but mah queen is always here to shine
alexandrasaintmluex 😍
lecleccreamss since when did F1 turn into a wag thing. Seriously F1? This content is unnecessary!
alexandramyqueen omg our couple is back yayyy
mimosahater @F1Dramaa post. look at this post.
@F1Drama:
"Rumors are flying that Y/N and Alexandra had a heated argument in the Ferrari garage. How much longer can this triangle last? #CharlesLeclerc #YN"
@FerrariInsider:
"It’s getting messy. Y/N is too professional to get involved, but Alexandra seems to be on edge. #F1Gossip #FerrariDrama"
@LeclercNation:
"Y/N is just trying to do her job, but Alex is clearly feeling threatened. Charles needs to step up. #TeamYN"
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
You were packing up in the garage, getting reading to back to the hotel, when Alexandra appeared at the doorway. She looked calm, but there was a fire in her eyes.
"We need to talk." Alex said
You set down your notes, bracing yourself. You replied, "About what?"
"About Charles. About you."
"I’m just doing my job, Alexandra. If you think I’m trying to come between you two, you’re wrong."
Alexandra crossed her arms, stepping closer. "I don’t know if I believe that. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other. I’m not stupid!"
Your jaw clenched. "You’re right. You’re not stupid. But you’re also insecure. And that’s not my problem. I’m here because I’m good at what I do, and Charles knows that."
"Insecure?" Alexandra’s voice was laced with venom. "Do you have any idea what it’s like watching him put you before me over and over again?"
"He doesn’t put me before you, Alexandra. He’s just focused on his career. If you can’t handle that, maybe the problem isn’t me. Maybe it’s your relationship."
Alexandra stared at you, her expression hardening. "You think you’re so untouchable, don’t you? That because you’re the team strategist, you’re safe. But I see the way you want him."
You took a deep breath, stepping forward. "If you’re so sure about that, then maybe you should talk to Charles instead of blaming me."
"Look here, Charles just won the Italian grandprix. It's a big celebration for team. Let's be happy for the win, instead of bringing this up, now."
"Have a great day, Alexandra" you said and left the paddock without any hesitation.
ursername
thank you bryan, charles, carlos, fred and the team for making this strategy happen! to our biggest supporters, the tifosi ❤️🔥❤️🔥
liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc and 6M others
lewishamilton absolutely fantastic strategy yn, you made it happen 👑👑
⤷ ursername i absolutely cannot wait for you to get on this team any longer!! tysm lewis, really appreciate it 💕💕💫
charles_leclerc tu as réalisé mon plus grand rêve, merci ma belle stratège, ma meilleure amie bien-aimée 🥇🥇🥳🥳❤️❤️❤️
⤷ ursername you were behind the wheel, you make us all dream mon rêveur, mon soleil 🩷🩷
mlnmarta such a shame i wasn't able to witness this but again, ma petite sœur, tu nous fais tous rêver 🥹
⤷ ursername tu aimes me faire pleurer 🥹❤️
After the Azerbaijan Grand Prix
charles_leclerc
story, 2m ago
Part 2 when?
#Spotify#charles leclerc#cl16#formula 1#f1 fanfic#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fluff#cl16 x reader#f1 fanfiction#f1 fic#f1 imagines#f1 social media au#smau#Charles Leclerc smau#charles leclerc smau#bykshre fics#alexandra saint mleux#x yn
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happiest of birthdays to you, lovely ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ i hope u have the best day <3
fank uuuu my looove !!! ur so sweet wah this is so luvly <3333
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US, AGAIN .ೃ
pairing. itoshi sae x gn!reader
genre. second chance (exes back to lovers!) | a bit of small town romance | a sprinkle of childhood friends to lovers (past) | angst with a happy ending
content/warnings. 5.2k+ wc | characters are aged 25 in the present | pro-athlete!sae x coffee shop owner!reader | sae left for spain at 19 in here | mentions of sae’s vague past (especially the striker dream) | itoshi bros conflict never happened here let me be delusional | heavy in narration | minimal proofread
in which: itoshi sae returns to the only place on earth he vows to never set foot again.
💭 flashbacks are italicized and indented :>
Six years.
In those six long years of his absence, you couldn't deny that you rehearsed countless scenarios of encountering him upon his return.
If by chance he still wanted to see you, or even look at you, you imagined giving him a small smile, a carefully crafted facade of composure, before gracefully walking away, as if life had moved on effortlessly for both of you.
That’s what you imagined. Just walk away, like how life went on for the both of you.
But reality never seemed to align with your reveries. The sight of him wasn't remotely serene enough to prompt a composed exit. Seeing him made your throat tighten, and your heart danced in a rhythm only he could create.
Six damn years had passed since you last saw him on that balcony, and now, with him back in town, avoiding him seemed like the only right thing to do.
You don’t know how long he’ll be here, but it is now your life mission to avoid him at all cost. Today's encounter was just an unfortunate event—an inevitable twist of fate. Their house was literally right in front of your family's, making it hard to escape the nearness of the past.
“So, he’s back in town?”
Hari's voice, your co-worker and now a dear friend, snapped you back from the reverie of yesterday's memories. The sound of her voice broke through the nostalgic haze, pulling you back to the present.
“What?”
“I asked if your childhood friend who is also a superstar slash professional athlete slash your only ex is back,” she mischievously asked, even miming quotation marks to emphasize each title she created.
You chuckled softly, shaking your head at her antics. Your gaze drifted to the freshly baked pastries, their delightful aroma greeting your senses like a warm embrace as you artfully displayed them on the shelves. The familiar scent of coffee and delightful confections used to calm you, but now it mingled with the storm of emotions inside.
“Yeah, it's basically the talk of the town. He's famous after all,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and still focused on your work, using it as a shield to hide your vulnerability.
But in reality, the sight of him earlier had caught you off guard, and you had turned the other way to avoid him. Your heart was still racing from the almost encounter, and the comforting ambiance of your coffee shop provided little solace.
“Did he see you?”
“I pray to all saints that he didn’t,” you deadpanned, your facade of composure beginning to falter.
“What did he look like now?”
You hesitated, your mind flashing back to that fleeting glimpse of him earlier.
Far from what was once mine. “Good.”
“That’s it? Good?”
No. He looked gorgeous. He looked painfully gorgeous.
“What do you want me to say?” you countered, throwing a side glance to her persistence.
In that fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of how much he had changed. He looked undeniably handsome, lean, and with a certain maturity that hadn't been there before.
He… looked different.
And that's good—for you and for him. It meant that life there treated him well, and it eased some of the lingering guilt you carried.
You and Hari fell into a consuming silence, your backs turned away from each other. Even with closed eyes, you sensed that she wanted to ask something. You didn't want to initiate the conversation, but this suffocating silence had to go.
As you stepped behind the counter, you were met with Hari's concerned eyes and a voice laden with hesitation. “What are you going to do then?” she carefully asked.
You pressed your lips together, momentarily at a loss for words.
So you did what you do best: mask hurting with laughter.
“Is there anything I should do?” you paused, the sound of your fake laughter ringing in your ears. “It's been years. We made a choice.”
But Hari wasn't ready to let the matter rest, and you don’t know how to tell her you’re close to calling it a day. “You made a choice for him,” she countered gently, her tone filled with empathy.
Stunned was an understatement. Caught off guard would be an apt description. But speechless was exactly how you felt.
That, you couldn't mask with anything.
So you did what you weren’t best at: admitting the truth.
“And I’ll do it again,” you whispered in return. It was faint, because it was more for you than more of a reply to her.
You were both young, and half oblivious to what it would be like outside, where the world wasn’t painted in golden hues and the gentle waves were replaced by blaring cars.
You were both seventeen, young and living for the hope of it all.
But you lived for days like those – days where both of you just had to be kids still. No worries, no voices of what might come.
“Tell me about your dreams, Sae.” “Tch. You already know about it.”
You did. All of it, you knew. Since you were kids, no one knew him like you did. You were his lover and confidant. You knew about it, all too well and all too much.
“Come on!” you persisted, giving him an enthusiastic look. “The sky looks so pretty in this sunset, I want it to know about us.” The setting sun painted the sky in hues of pink and orange, casting a warm glow over the beach as you and Sae sat side by side in the sand. The sound of gentle waves caressed your ears, creating a serene backdrop for your beach date. He hesitated for a moment, looking out at the horizon. Then there it was, a glint of determination flashed in his usually reserved eyes. “To be the best striker in the world.” You couldn't help but be captivated by the sight. It was the first time you had seen such an unusual spark in his eyes. Sae's gaze was often cold and impersonal, but now it was as if stars were hanging in his eyes, reflecting the infinite possibilities of his dreams. Sae is handsome, mysteriously beautiful even. But this, nothing will beat how dreamy he looks when he speaks of his craft. You liked this look on him - so ambitious, so driven. It made your heart flutter with admiration. Seeing this glint in his eyes right now, you knew you wanted to do anything in your power to let it stay there.
And you did, you held on and held out. Until you turned nineteen, when you had let him go to the big cities where he rightfully belonged.
You smiled, a genuine, heartwarming smile, and leaned in to press a tender kiss on his cheek. “I’m sure you will be the best.”
Maybe you bit off more than what you could chew, but in the end, you’d do it all over again. Because what you did, the choice you made – it was for the best.
You were both nineteen, young and eager to grasp the world's offerings with hopeful hands.
But despite the certainty you tried to hold onto, there were nights when the memories tugged at your heartstrings like it did now. You knew it was the right choice, that you both needed to chase your dreams separately — especially his dreams. But it didn't erase the whispers of what-ifs that occasionally crept into your mind.
But life — life went on. Life never waits for anyone, anyway. And so, you worked diligently to craft a future that no longer had room for regrets.
But love leaves echoes, and his presence back in town stirred those dormant feelings. With him being in the same place, you felt like a stranger in your own town.
It was easier when he was thousands of miles away, an untouchable star on a different horizon. But now, with the universe conspiring to bring you close again, you couldn't help but feel like a wanderer in the galaxy of memories you built together.
After all, everything here in this town is about you and him.
Six years.
Was it that long? He couldn’t really tell. Maybe time really does pass fast when your life is falling apart.
It has been six years since Sae has sat on the balcony of his childhood home. And like the sick bastard fate was, he’s welcomed by the sight of your horrified yet still so damn fucking beautiful face.
Perhaps the saints you prayed to didn’t hear any of your pleas, because despite calling out to each one, Sae saw you.
There you were, a flicker in the periphery of his vision, desperately trying to avoid him. He was trained to be very aware of his field of vision, so there was no way he wasn’t able to notice your frantic leaving and the hurried closing of your house’s door as you noticed him.
He let you be, holding back the overwhelming desire to call out your name like he used to when both of you were running late to class. He let you be, because if you were to ask him, he wouldn’t know how to look you in the eye without a thousand words reflecting on his own.
[Attention, everyone. This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 924 to Madrid, Spain. Again, this is the final –] “Sae, you’re going to miss your flight. They’re not coming.” No. “They’re not coming, Sae. You have to get on the plane.” No. No. Shut up.
He needed you there, more than anyone. A thousand people could cheer and show up for Itoshi Sae, but his eyes will always search the crowd for just one — just yours.
Yet, alas, you were nowhere to be found. And so, that very same day, Sae vowed to never come back to this place.
He hated this town and you, he’s convinced.
Sae had always been indifferent to a lot of people, everyone knew that. But never in a hundred years would anyone who knew you both think you’d be on that list. And deep down, he didn’t want to believe it either – until that day you decided not to show up when you promised you would.
He wasn't stupid. He had an inkling of why you did what you did. Yet, irrationality overpowered reason, and all he wanted that day was to run the distance between the airport and your house – to see your face, to remind you that he had plans, plans for both of you.
When Sae’s manager informed him that he needed to come home for a while to renew his passport, it was as if all of his suppressed recollections of this place – of you, came pouring out to his soul all at once.
Every street, every corner, every memory — they all threatened to consume him. His family, Rin, this town, and you – you were all the things he left behind for the dream.
Dream. Best Striker in the world. What did it even mean? Long ago, he thought he knew.
But it had to work. Everything had to work. He lost you for this dream. And if he loses it too, then what does that make him? A sore failure. And Sae was never known to be admissible to failing.
Whatever hell he encountered on the other side of the world, he swore he would never return home. Even when he was traversing across a path to ruin of being the person he thought he would be, he would never ever choose to come home.
Anywhere, but here. Anywhere, but home.
So there he was, the renowned glorious prodigy of japan. He was close to everything after countless mishaps.
He’s getting closer and closer to the new dream yet getting farther and farther away from home.
Home. What does it even mean? Lately, he doesn’t even know.
And after that day, no one ever mentioned your name to him. No one in his new world knew about you. No one knew how Itoshi Sae's world used to revolve around someone's soft smiles and easy eyes.
He never asked anyone not to mention you; he wasn't one to ask, after all. But for some reason, no one dared to. Not even Rin. It was as if one mention of you in his presence was a carefully crafted brick used to make his castles crumble to the ground.
He hated that, but maybe they were right. Because with just a second's worth of a glimpse of you from earlier, Sae indeed felt his castles crumbling, piece by piece.
He hates you, for making his resolve crumble. For being the one person who can make his vow to never look back fall apart.
He hates you, because everything in this forsaken place is about you and him. Memories of your shared youth are etched into the very walls and streets, haunting him like ghosts of a past he can't escape.
He hates you, for not trusting you two would work it out somehow, and for giving up before the game even began.
He hates you, because it was easier that way. Easier to pretend he didn't care, that you didn't matter, and that you were just another soul he knows a little too much of.
Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more, and yet he knows, only one of it was true – and that he hates you for making him convince himself that he does, just to cope with leaving half of his heart to the only place he vowed never to come back to.
It was a jinx to say that yesterday’s encounter was already an unfortunate event, because today, you literally learned a whole new degree of unfortunate and unlucky – by having Itoshi Sae as your first customer of the day.
“Welcome! How may I help you toda— S-Sae.”
And to even top it off, today was Hari’s day off. It meant that you’re currently alone in the same confined four-cornered room with the person you swore you would avoid like it’s your life mission.
Damn it, Hari. Of all days. Her day off really had to be today.
Itoshi Sae, in the goddamn flesh, is standing in your place two meters away from you, yet you’re having a hard time feeling your feet on the ground and your heart beating so damn loud.
He wasn’t looking at you (thank god), and had his eyes exploring the place with a neutral expression playing on his face. Suddenly, you feel like sixteen again back when he was looking at the first set of cookies you’ve ever baked and you were dying to hear what he thinks of your craft.
“It’s yours?”
You gulp.
You gulped down the urge to tear up with how much his voice changed. You gulped down the urge to cry because he assumed you had your dream turn into reality too.
“Yeah,” you replied in whisper, your eyes following where he was looking, trying to avoid any chance it will meet his, “it’s not much but —”
“It’s beautiful.” Even before Sae could hear your meek comment of yourself, he cut you off.
You were always like that —downplaying your hard work, belittling yourself even before someone does. He hated that about you.
He used to get mad at you for it, especially when someone made fun of you at school and you didn’t defend yourself. He always makes you cry whenever he points it out, so he stopped. Instead, he made it his role to rebuild your confidence. Sae wasn't known for being generous in compliments. It would probably take one hand to count all the instances that he genuinely called someone along the lines of not dumb, stupid, lukewarm.
But it was never the case with you. With you, to say beautiful was always a second nature to Sae's tongue.
And he wasn’t lying though. Your coffee shop was really charmingly cozy, and so like you. It’s so much alike to what you used to tell him how you envisioned it would be.
The coffee shop was a quaint haven nestled right at the edge of the sandy shore. Its exterior, adorned with weathered wooden panels and soft, warm hues, exuded a rustic charm that welcomed passersby with open arms. Sunlight spilled through large windows, casting gentle rays that danced upon the vintage, mosaic-tiled floor.
It’s beautiful, and it’s in front of our place. He wanted to say to you, but he stopped at beautiful not wanting to make things more awkward than it should.
The coffee shop, it’s right in front of the beach. It’s in front of that one spot you and him used to call ours.
It’s the first thing he noticed before coming inside, and it made him wonder whether you knew or he’s the only one who remembers it even now.
Bashful, you uttered a silent thank you to his remark, “What would you like to order?” you followed up, trying to maintain composure despite your heart racing in your chest.
Noticing that he’s been too silent for someone who’s about to order something, you looked up to your menu, and immediately, you understood his silence. If one were to point out, it is too immediate for someone who’s almost strangers to each other.
“We have non-caffeinated drinks too,” you hurriedly said to him, your voice quivering slightly as you tried to break the spell of awkward silence.
He gulps, his eyes locked with yours in a moment that felt like eternity.
He can’t drink coffee, it ruins his body clock, and you knew that. You still know that.
It appears that he's not the only one who remembers, after all.
A thousand emotions danced in his eyes, each one a testament to the love that once blossomed between you. The coffee shop, once a quaint haven, now felt like a crucible of emotions, and the atmosphere was thick with unspoken words, heavy with the weight of what could have been.
Your breath caught in your throat, and you couldn't look away, despite the rush of memories and unspoken words flooding your mind. It was as if time had folded in on itself, and you were once again those young souls who found solace in each other's presence.
But this was different, much more complicated. The past was a turbulent sea, and even though you had both moved on with your lives, there was still a deep, lingering connection that couldn't be severed.
Yet, you knew better than to let those emotions take control. You made a choice, you have to stand by it.
You were no longer the naive teenagers who believed love could conquer all. Reality had taught you both harsh lessons, and the wounds of the past still lingered, threatening to reopen with each stolen glance.
“I’ll have your best seller of it then,” he finally broke the silence, his voice steady despite the tempest inside.
With a nod, you turned to prepare his order, your hands trying to steady themselves. You couldn't help but wonder if he noticed the tremor in your fingers or the way your heart seemed to echo in every beat.
As you handed him his drink, your fingertips brushed lightly against his hand, and for a brief moment, the world stood still.
He took the cup from you, and for a fleeting moment, you both lingered, almost as if neither of you wanted to let go. He could stay in this, playing pretend. Pretend none of it happened, pretend he never left, pretend it worked out in the end.
But he can’t, not when you stepped back first, breaking the contact between you and reminding him of the choice you made.
“Thank you,” he managed to say, his voice softer now, filled with a hint of something even he couldn't quite decipher.
“You’re welcome,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
And just like that, the moment passed, slipping through your fingers like sand. He turned to leave, and you watched him walk away, every step taking him farther from the life you once shared.
Perhaps, in some parallel universe, there existed a version of you who chose differently, who stayed intertwined with him in a tale of love that defied all odds. But here, in this reality, both of you were no longer who you used to be.
In this universe, you're just some two ghosts standing in the place of you and him, haunted by the memories of what once was while trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat.
After Sae’s visit yesterday, saying that you weren’t doing fine would be a gross understatement.
Your emotions were all over the place, and you couldn't seem to find a stable ground for your thoughts. It didn't help when your parents casually mentioned that he was leaving town later today. Apparently, Mrs. Itoshi had a little gossip session with the neighbors, unknowingly revealing a piece of her oldest son's business.
He’s leaving, and that's good—for you and for him.
As you stood behind the counter of the coffee shop, you absentmindedly glanced out the window, your eyes drawn to the beach. The sight of the shore brought back a flood of memories.
Maybe in another life, the two of you could still dance along the sandy shore, playfully splashing water at each other. He would chase after you, catching hold of your waist as he sweeps you off your feet. And perhaps, just perhaps, you would have the chance to embrace him tightly once again, with your arms wrapped around his neck while you share a kiss as greedy and fiery as the sea’s yearning for the moon.
And maybe, in another life, your story wouldn’t end with both of you being strangers who know a little too much about each other.
Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice the tears streaming down your cheeks until Hari whispered, “Y/N... you're crying.”
“Oh, I am,” you admitted, trying to regain your composure.
Your heart lurched as you tried to suppress the tears, but they kept flowing relentlessly. “Hari…” you whispered, shocked by your own emotional outpouring.
Hari's eyes reflected pity as she watched you, her voice soft and understanding. “Go,” she encouraged, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Get your man. I'll take care of everything here.”
The words hit you like a lifeline, a spark of hope igniting within you. You quickly removed your apron and grabbed your keys, determined to catch him before it was too late.
But before you could dash out, Hari's voice echoed through the shop, loud and clear, “Go! Be happy! And for the love of god, no more sacrifices as a love language!”
With one last glance at her and your coffee shop, you rushed out the door.
The airport seemed like a maze of bustling strangers as you frantically searched for the departure gates. Every passing second felt like an eternity, the fear of missing him consuming you.
Desperation and determination fueled your steps as you approached the flight attendant, your voice trembling, “Flight to Spain — I need to know about the flight to Spain for today.”
The attendant looked at you with sympathy, “I'm sorry, but all flights to Spain have already left. The last one left twenty minutes ago.”
Your heart sank, but you couldn't give up that easily. “Can you check again? Please. I-I need to see him. Please.”
The attendant double-checked, but the outcome remained unchanged.
Twenty damn minutes. You lost him in just that short amount of time.
Your heart shattered as you realized you had missed your chance. The desperation in your eyes was evident as you felt your world crumbling around you.
In the midst of the bustling airport, you allowed yourself to grieve for what could have been and for the chances you never took.
Six years ago, you were supposed to be here. And maybe if you did, you wouldn't find yourself six years after, wishing you did things differently.
The drive back felt like the longest journey of your life.
The sinking sun painted the sky with hues of orange and pink as you approached the familiar place. As you got closer, you noticed that the shop was already closed, and you assumed Hari had taken care of everything.
But what caught you off guard was the sight of Sae standing there, in front of your place, with a suitcase by his side, as if he were meant to be on a flight rather than standing there.
“You're here,” you whispered, your heart pounding in your chest as you got closer.
“I’m here.”
“Why didn't you leave?” you asked.
Because I’m done convincing myself that I hate you, Sae hesitated to say. “Why did you go to the airport?” he countered instead, avoiding your question.
Because I’m done telling myself that I did the right thing.
There were so many things you wanted to say, but the words were caught in your throat. You bit your lip, not ready to answer his question just yet.
Impatient and desperate, Sae took his chances to ask you the only question that mattered to him at this point, “Tell me you don't love me anymore. I will go. I will do as you please. I just need to hear it from you.”
Your eyes widened at his sudden question, but Sae wasn’t done yet. “Answer me. It’s a yes or no question.”
Lost in a whirlwind of emotions, you couldn't hold back the torrent of words that poured from your heart.
“A yes or no question, you say? Every night, I think of you.”
With each word, your voice wavered, and you couldn't help but express the worries that had plagued you during his absence.
“Were you eating properly? Does the food there suit your liking? You’re a bit picky. Is it too hot there? Were you taking your supplements? Were you being hard on yourself again? Is... is there someone new? There must be, right?”
As the words left your lips, you realized just how much you had been consumed by thoughts of him, wondering about every aspect of his life, even when he was miles away from you.
His reaction to you holding forth seemed to intensify at your last question, but right now, you weren’t ready to listen to him. He needs to listen to you.
“Every single night of the past six years, I yearned for you. I yearned to have you close. I yearned to hold your face just once more. And fuck, I would’ve traded all my tomorrows for just one yesterday with you.”
With those words, the floodgates of emotion burst open, and tears streamed down your cheeks.
Fuck, six years. For six years, you held on and held out. Would it have been easier if both of you had tried, and along the way, lost? Would it have alleviated the pain of what-ifs and what could have been's if you had bargained, if you had gambled? Or would it all have led you right back to this moment, grappling with the same heartache and uncertainty?
Finally, meeting his eyes, you saw a reflection of your own emotions in his. But you weren’t done yet.
“And you dare ask me if I love you. Well, does that answer your fucking question, Itoshi?”
“Then, don’t cross it out. Don’t ever cross it out again.”
Cross what…out?
“I saw your letter,” Sae admitted, causing a momentary confusion to wash over you.
My letter… Bewildered, you couldn't form the right words, and he took it as a sign to continue, and to close the distance between you to hold your hands.
“Tell me, how could I leave after reading that, knowing the only soul who truly knew me was here? You own me, Y/N.”
“I told you countless times before, you own me,” Sae reaffirmed, his grip on your hand tightening as he drew it closer to his lips, planting tender kisses upon your skin.
“There was no one,” he continued, his words carrying a sense of reassurance. “And there's no other warmth comparable to yours that I'd ever let myself bask in. And if there's any, I'd be only fooling myself, pretending it was you instead.”
Sae's voice grew softer, yet resolute. “You own me, even when I'm on the other side of the world. You own me, Y/N. Even in the distance that separated us, even in the years that you claim I'm not."
He stepped closer, his eyes locked with yours, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. “No place can ever own me as much as you do. So, don't ever cross your I love you's to me. I want them – all. I don't want your sorry's.”
“But I’m sorry,” you whispered, for the last time. But Sae gently wiped away your tears.
“It's ‘I love you’ from now on.”
For a moment, you both stayed like that, trying to make up for the lost time. Sae, much like you, dreamed of the day he gets to hold you close once again. He dreamed of a day he gets to watch the sunset from the reflection of your eyes again.
Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more reasons why he shouldn't be standing here, and yet he knew, only one of it was true – and that he hated himself for convincing himself that he shouldn't be here – to you, in his hometown.
Sae may have vowed to never come back to this place, but it was always a lie, because for all he knew, it's the only place he truly belonged. Half of his heart was left here, with you.
“Come on,” Sae said, and you followed him, curiosity in your eyes.
“Where are we going?”
“There,” Sae pointed to the beach, your spot, specifically. “To our place. The sky looks pretty, and I want it to know about us, again.”
“Us... again?” you asked hesitantly.
“If you would take me back.” Sae answered, a hint of fear in his eyes, afraid that he might be assuming this second chance for the two of you.
You took his hand in response, and squeezed it three times. “I want nothing more than to be with you, again.”
Without any more words, Sae gently cupped your cheeks, his touch sending shivers down your spine. The touch of his fingers was both familiar and new.
In the fading light of the day, his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that made your heart race. The anticipation hung heavy in the air as you leaned closer to each other, your breath hitched as his warm breath mingled with yours.
His lips were soft against yours, and as they moved with a tenderness that mirrored the way he held you, it was as if he was trying to convey everything he had ever wanted to say to you in that one, passionate moment.
The kiss deepened, and you could feel the intensity of his emotions pouring into it. It was a kiss that spoke of all the words left unsaid, of all the nights spent missing each other, and of all the dreams of a future together.
Feeling the tears streaming down your cheeks, Sae pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. And in that moment, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be – here.
To you, in his hometown.
💭 thank you for the request saetorinrin! (i owe you a lot for your patience i guess..)
note. hi. if you’ve been here before, you might know that i hate this trope with a burning passion, i just can’t write it for the life of me. i started this in may (and only had the guts to finish it this month lmao), i was so tempted to delete everything and start from scratch (for the nth time) but i think i owe it to myself to retain most of what i wrote when i was stranded on an island xd this isn’t my best, that, i know for sure. but i hope you’ll still like it !
💌 if you reached this part, and you want to know about reader’s letter that sae’s was referencing, here it is. you may or may not read this, it won’t really matter. but if you want to, click until the end :>
💭 back to: milestone event
#☁️ my ode to you#first milestone event!#writing: 003#itoshi sae x reader#itoshi sae#itoshi sae x y/n#blue lock x reader#blue lock imagines#itoshi sae fluff#bllk x reader#bllk imagines#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi#itoshi sae angst#blue lock angst
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hii could i request a quiet arsenal reader x katie mccabe? the team know katie has a gf but don’t know who and tease her/ try to convince her to spill in the changing room not knowing r is her. they finally find out when r (usually v calm) gets angry after being targeted in a match and katie runs over and calls her a pet name while calming her down bc no one else could. everyone is shocked but happy. sorry it’s long 😅
Not so secret 🤫
Katie Mccabe × reader
warning : fluffy 💭💗
The Arsenal locker room was buzzing with post-training energy. Conversations flowed easily, laughter bounced off the walls, and the sound of boots being tossed into lockers filled the air. Katie sat in her usual spot, tugging off her socks, a smirk playing on her lips as she listened to her teammates’ banter.
Leah, ever the instigator, glanced at Katie with a teasing glint in her eyes. "Alright, McCabe, you’ve been dodging the question all week. When are you finally going to tell us who your mystery girlfriend is?"
Katie raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "Dunno what you’re talking about, Williamson," she said, though her grin betrayed her.
“Oh, come on, Katie! We know you’ve got a girlfriend,” Beth Mead chimed in. “We’ve seen you texting someone all the time with that ridiculous smile on your face. Just tell us who she is already!”
Katie rolled her eyes, trying to suppress a laugh. “You lot are like a pack of nosy hens. Maybe I just like keeping you guessing.”
The rest of the team erupted in mock groans, though it was clear they were enjoying the challenge. They had been trying to get Katie to spill the details for weeks now, and it was only making them more curious that she hadn’t cracked yet.
Vivianne leaned back against her locker, eyes narrowed in thought. “I’m just saying, whoever she is, she must be a saint to put up with you,” she joked, earning a laugh from everyone.
Meanwhile, across the room, you were quietly slipping out of your training gear, listening to the conversation with a faint smile on your lips. You were always one of the quieter members of the team, preferring to stay out of the spotlight. But you couldn’t help but enjoy watching Katie squirm as the team tried to guess who her girlfriend was.
Katie glanced over at you briefly, her eyes softening for just a second before she turned back to the group. “You lot wouldn’t last five minutes trying to figure it out,” she said confidently. “And that’s all you’re getting from me.”
The rest of the week continued much the same. The team tried every tactic they could think of to get Katie to reveal her girlfriend’s identity, but she stayed tight-lipped, playing it off with humor and deflection.
Match day came, and Arsenal was playing against a particularly aggressive team. The game was rough, with the opponents not shying away from harsh tackles. Katie was, as always, in the thick of it, but so were you. You were usually calm and composed, keeping your head down and focusing on the game. You didn’t get riled up easily, no matter how physical things got on the pitch.
But then, midway through the second half, it happened. An opponent delivered a harsh, deliberate shove that sent you sprawling to the ground. It was clearly targeted, meant to rile you up, and for the first time, it worked. You got to your feet, eyes blazing, and stepped up to the player, your calm facade cracking as you exchanged heated words.
The referee blew the whistle, stepping in to diffuse the situation, but it wasn’t until Katie came sprinting over that you backed off.
Katie’s expression was a mix of concern and irritation as she reached you, gently placing her hands on your shoulders. “Hey, hey, hey, babe, breathe. Look at me,” she said softly, her Irish accent thickening as she spoke. “Calm down, yeah? She’s not worth it.”
The change in you was immediate. You took a deep breath, your shoulders relaxing under Katie’s touch as you met her eyes. “I’m fine,” you mumbled, though you didn’t look away. Katie gave you a reassuring smile, her hands lingering for a moment before she stepped back.
The rest of the team had been watching the scene unfold, and now they were staring, wide-eyed and slack-jawed. Leah’s mouth was practically hanging open. “Wait a minute... did you just call her ‘babe’?”
Beth was the first to recover, a grin spreading across her face. “No way,” she said, laughing. “She is your girlfriend?!”
Katie looked over her shoulder at her teammates, her cheeks flushing slightly but her expression defiant. “Yeah, she is. Problem?” she said, though the playful challenge in her voice made it clear she wasn’t actually worried.
There was a moment of stunned silence, and then the rest of the team burst into cheers and whoops, with a few mock wolf whistles thrown in for good measure.
“Oh my God, this is the best plot twist ever!” Beth exclaimed, still laughing. “And you kept this from us for how long?”
You couldn’t help but blush at all the attention, but you were smiling too, your earlier anger completely forgotten. “We weren’t exactly trying to keep it a secret,” you said softly, glancing at Katie. “Just... didn’t make a big deal out of it.”
“Well, it’s a big deal now!” Leah declared, coming over to give Katie a friendly shove. “Can’t believe you didn’t tell us, McCabe. But I guess we should’ve known. Only you could get (Y/N) to chill out like that.”
Katie just laughed, slipping an arm around your waist and pulling you close. “Guess it’s out in the open now,” she said, leaning down to press a quick kiss to your forehead. “Hope you’re all happy.”
“Oh, we’re more than happy,” Vivianne said, shaking her head with a grin. “Just don’t expect us to stop teasing you about it.”
Katie rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide her smile. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”
As the team gathered around to offer their congratulations, you couldn’t help but feel a warmth in your chest, grateful that the secret was out—and even more grateful that you didn’t have to hide your happiness anymore. Katie’s hand in yours was all the reassurance you needed, a silent promise that you would face whatever came next together.
I hope you like it 💕
#woso x reader#arsenal x reader#arsenal women#arsenal wfc#arsenal#katie mccabe#katie mccabe x reader
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thinking 💭 about the inverted funhouse mirror reflections of david ward's mommy issues in i am in eskew and VAL's in the silt verses. "i used to fantasise about the death of my mother as a way to explain why i feel so alienated from the people around me, but now i am alone in a strange place subjected to daily horrors i dream of the comfort she might have offered me" vs. "i used to dream of earning my mother's love in order to prove her wrong about there being something inherently hateful about me, but now i know that she had already given up on me i long to torture and kill her and act out that fantasy over and over on the people around me who i have been alienated from by my transfiguration into a saint".
#🐉#i am in eskew#the silt verses#VAL thesiltverses#reading into VAL's pre-sainthood relationship with her mother a Lot but i dont think im wrong. based on what i know about#relationships between children and their mothers who dont love them.
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fried. 🫠
#I’m still in here 🏥#but feeling better fasho#nurse ain’t been stingy with the Percs at all#get well soon Saint#💭
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I CAUGHT UR BOX OPEN AAAA
This is smth ive really been wanting to say, saint, and that youre truly one of a kind. The way you built your characters like gojo's development and battles with his feelings, yn as a person and her pain and considerations, akemi's conflicting yet understandable anger, things that just ties everything together on why this person did this many chapters ago, and so much more is just so flavorful that it brings me so much bittersweet feelings (its reached a point where i sometimes look at these characters differently when i see them in the show??? 😭)
it has never been this difficult to be biased on one character when the rest just have the most valid responses in the whole ordeal (and this doesn't just apply in sy, even in wasteland, sn, and your shakespearean pieces?? oml) not only that but your plot building is truly beautiful that i want to witness the end of it and this just proves on how much of an amazing writer you are 🥹 as a fellow writer hobbyist (in a diff platform) i truly look up to you and admire your talent, i put so much high regard on your hardwork and i hope you do too.
i recently switched to a new account but i've been reading your works since before sn finished and i will gladly stay in the saint (angst) hype-train and wait for every chapter and new works you release!
sorry for the rant but i just wanna say that i appreciate you and your work. Don't let socmed pressure you on how you should control your hobbies and happiness 🥹💭💝
thank you so much 🥹 reading through your message means a lot to me! this is so sweet and supportive, i’m in tears aaaaaaa T-T it’s honestly difficult to write such emotionally damaged characters, especially with how complicated the events in sy are. but hearing you guys theorizing and analyzing in such great detail makes writing all the more rewarding :’)
the paragraph long analyses abt the yn-gojo-akemi situation are always a joy for me to read! pls take my heart, all of u <33
#🖤: letters to saint#series: sincerely yours#sorry for the late response i thought i had answered this one alr 🥲
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But I love you
Prompt: “But I love you”
Pairing: bucky x reader
Word count: 700+
Summary: Sometimes love isn’t enough :(
A/n: This is a one-shot for an angstober prompt. My first time posting, please be nice I haven’t written anything in years. So let me know what you think 💭 and constructive criticism is welcome! If you would like me to write anything else, send me a message 🫶🏻
“But I love you” Bucky spoke, voice breaking as he looked down at his hands.
You were both sat beside each other on the sofas in the common area of the compound. Bucky hadn’t looked at you for the entire conversation, you were glad he hadn’t. You weren’t so sure you could do this if you had to look into his all-consuming blue eyes. His leg was barely touching yours and it took all your strength to not press yours against him, into that familiar warmth of his body.
“That’s the problem Jamie” you broke, wiping the tears that were already falling.
You smiled as you spoke, smiling at the sheer ridiculousness of the situation. How could loving someone be the reason why it hand to end? But it wasn’t just love, it’s was unwavering obsession, a blind infatuation, blazing dependency that entangled you both.
Addiction. You were addicted to one another. But every addict had a dealer, someone who would encourage your bad habits even though they were wrong. You enabled the darkest parts of one another, forgave each other for things that weren’t your place to forgive.
You and Bucky had met at the wrong time. Too early in your healing journeys. Two broken people finding solace within the cracks of one another. Rose tinted glasses hiding the shadows that lurked only just below the skin.
You had plenty of baggage, trauma to unpack and wrongs to right. When you first joined the Avengers you thought that maybe this would be your redemption. Your chance to change things, prove to people that you weren’t the monster that Hydra made you to be. It was supposed to be the same for Bucky too. But fighting a few bad guys doesn’t erase the past, and it certainly doesn’t erase the damage in your minds.
And although you were there to comfort one another after the nightmares and panic attacks…sometimes you fed each other a delusion. Helped one another avoid the truth of your realities. The reality being that you both needed help and time to heal.
“You love me so much…so much so that you put me on this unrealistic pedestal.” You raised your hands up in the air as you looked up “you think I’m a saint, that I’m perfect-”
“But you are perfect…perfect for me” he argued back, finally lifting those blue eyes to yours. Tears brimmed the edges of his eyes. He didn’t understand, couldn’t wrap his head around what was happening. He had finally found someone who understood him, someone who mirrored every part of him.
It was around a year after Bucky had joined the Avengers that they found you. Perfectly stored on ice in a forgotten Hydra facility. Your story was very similar to his own and you both quickly bonded over your traumas.
“Baby please I can’t lose you…” Bucky choked out. He’d moved onto his knees in front you, arm wrapping round your waist and flesh hand caressing your cheek. He would beg and beg if he had to. He needed you. “I can’t do this… without you”
“But that’s the thing Bucky, I know that you can” you rested your hand on his, your thumb rubbing gently while you ran you hand through the ends of this hair.
“You are so much stronger than you think, and right now I’m holding you back” you nodded as if to reassure yourself what you were saying was true. “We’re holding each other back”
You both had some healing to do, and that needed to be done alone.
﹏
You and Bucky had stayed tangled in each others arms the rest of that night, sharing final kisses and soft whispers. Promises of reconnection once you had both healed.
That was the thing though, your healing took you both to different places. Despite you both learning to accept and forgive the darkest parts of yourself, your outcomes were very different. A year on you were ready to rekindle with your love, your Jamie being on your mind everyday since your departure.
But Bucky…he felt different. It took him a long time to finally accept himself and he found comfort in the idea leading a simple life with a simple love.
The reality sunk in when he saw you. You were a mirror of him completely, the good and bad. And as much as he had grown to accept his own reflection, you weren’t going to give him a simple love.
“But I love you” you muttered, staring up at the man you thought you knew. His hair was short now, and his blue eyes held a sadness within them.
Love wasn’t enough.
#bucky x female reader#bucky x reader#bucky x y/n#bucky x you#bucky barnes#angstober 2023#angst#angstober#bucky angst#Bucky barnes angst
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Today 🗓👈 is FUCKuary Fourteenth 🙇♂️😳❤️🔥❤️🔥 and that means its Saint 😇🙏 ValenTAINTs 🍑👈🥵 Day 🌞💞🌺🥰😍😏😏🤪 Whether ur 🤔 Taken Bacon 👯🍑🥓😘 or a Single Pringle 🧍🥠😬🤷 its time 2 👈 SPREAD 👉 ur Holey 🤸🕳 Bibble 📖 nice n WIDE 🤑😫😧😱🤯 cuz all year long 📅👀 Cupids been ✊⬆️ YANKING ✊⬇️😩 on his Bow 🏹🍆😫 n he’s finally 😮💨 ready 😳 to SHOOT 🎯👅👅👅 his 💓 Love Magic ✨💦😋 ALLLLLL over u 🏹🍑🎯🤤👅😉 HURRY 😰🏃 and fill 😋🍬👌 ur pretty 😍 lil box 🎁✨ with plenty of COCKlates 🍫🍆😜 cuz u know what they say 👴💬🤔 U never know who ur gonna get 😏🥳🍆💛💚🌷💖💝💐💌SEND📲 to 🔟 of ur most beloved 🥰 Valentines Vags 🌷👯💦 so they kno 💭 just how much 👬🤗 u wanna smooch em 💋👯🥰🥰💛💚🌷💖💝
WHAT???
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Do you have any favourite Shuri/Namor fanfics as of now?
excellent question! thx for asking 😇
right now I have yet to finish some but i started to compiling a list as soon as i finished watching WF the first time in theaters
here’s a couple i recommend…
ONE-SHOTS
I Wanna Be Yours by IntergalacticDolphinInYourBackYard
smutty but done tastefully 😜 (no pun intended lol)
sonámbula by lunarmoonbeam
namor & shuri meet in dreams 😴
then I’ll persuade you by WomanOf1000Faces
shuri decides to stays in Talokan instead of leaving with Nakia 👰♀️
sea change by wakandawinterprincess
shuri calls on namor after the war is over 🐚
it won’t be these clothes i burn by thefudge
darker tone, seductive, a retelling of Nashuri romance 😈🖤
Underworld by FairyRingsandWings
DARK fic😈, dead dove: do not eat, Namor wins AU, tw: DUBCON
COMPLETED
like snow at the beach by freedomatsea
slightly forbidden romance, hades/persephone vibes, smut 🚫💦
The Water Queen by tacotime
SLOW BURN 🔥 i absolutely love this one
waiting for you (all night) by breaddalton
kinky, possessive namor (so if that’s not ur thing it’s cool) 😈
NOT COMPLETED
pa’atení by neonheartbeat
namor & shuri must forge a tentative alliance in order to navigate dangerous threats 🫱🏾🫲🏿
But What is Grief? by justanotherwriter93
angsty, hurt/comfort, slow burn — this one’s really good if you wanna torture yourself with some angst 😩
the water cure by narqueen
PWP, canon divergence, arranged marriage 💍
to show you the whole sky by A_Spark_Of_Hope
marriage of convenience, grief/mourning 💍⚰️
I Need You Like Water by blueflam3
slow burn🔥 , namor is a SIMP, shuri’s independent
How is Never as Important as Why by weekdayworld
namor & shuri can see into each other’s memories through dreams, and experience first hand what the other has felt and seen 💭
saints above by filthyanimal
darkfic 😈, forced marriage au, dark! namor, TW: Noncon
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.
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bonus if y’all are interested in Okoye x Attuma
Breathless and Bathed in Soft Light by Siancore
this is just pure 🥵
An Alliance of Prurience by Siancore
a continuation of Breathless and Bathed, also 🥵
L’admirateur by Fruitsandlube
multi-chapter (not completed)
if y’all have anymore recommendations, feel free to leave em in the comments ✨ love ya 💙
#namor#shuri#black panther#wakanda forever#namor x shuri#shuri x namor#seaprincess#nashuri#namuri#fanfiction#fanfic rec#k’uk’ulkan#princess shuri#queen shuri#king namor#namor of talokan#namor the sub mariner#mcu namor#mcu shuri#questions
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