#“funny” in quotes
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#lol#memes#books#books and quotes#dark academia#light academia#chaos academia#humor#haha#meme#funny#twitter#tweet#dank memes
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#motivation#inspiration#words#quotes#books#books and quotes#mental health#adulthood#funny#lol#haha#humor#meme#memes
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#funny#lol#haha#humor#meme#memes#dank memes#dark academia#light academia#chaos academia#art#draw#drawing#artists on tumblr#grunge#soft grunge#goth#gothic#witchcore#witchblr#witch#dark humor#animals#bunny#bunnies#pale#alternative#words#quotes#books
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done healing my inner child. next up is my inner teen. her highness demands a sword.
#aesthetic#dark academia#light academia#spilled ink#thoughts#writers on tumblr#words#quotes#text#life quotes#life#funny memes#memes#relatable#girlblogging#girl interrupted#desiblr#desi#soft aesthetic#soft feminine#femme fatale#writing#txt#quoteoftheday#quote#poetry#divine feminine#just girly things#mental health#self love
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To anyone who thinks Bruce has a clear and consistent favourite child I raise you this: it is infinitely funnier for Bruce to have a complicated and elaborate “ranking” system of his kids that only he’s privy to.
Picture this: Batman, dosed with truth serum, gets asked as a gag from one of the goons holding him captive who his favourite bat-vigilante is and instead of giving a straight answer, he launches into this whole explanation about the ranking system and who’s in the current lead, who’s hanging behind, etc. At some point (this is a mystery to everyone involved) a whiteboard appears and he starts explaining his system like he’s a football coach before an important match. Out of nowhere he starts pulling out little cardboard cutouts of his kids and pins them to the board. At some point the red string comes out.
Jason hasn’t killed someone in a week? Automatically promoted to favourite. Tim hasn’t caused an international incident in the past month? Puts him a few points ahead that keep decreasing the longer he refuses real sleep (20 minute power naps don’t count Tim! Says powernap inventor Bruce Wayne). Cass gave him a hug this morning and wished him a good day? Favourite until he gets a call from dick telling him (without shouting!!!!) that he’ll be there for this week’s Sunday dinner. Duke accidentally scratches the Batmobile? Demoted to the “in trouble” zone (which, honestly, that’s where his kids spend most of the time in😭). Damian did not attempt to free all the animals in the zoo they visited? Favourite. Until Bruce found out he was just trying to conceal the cat hidden in his room that Bruce explicitly forbade him from keeping.
Dick arrives at the family dinner with a busted shoulder and a bruise the size of Texas on his face? Gets demoted so far down that even azraeil scores higher than him. He’s in the “in trouble” zone for a constant month after that. Oh one of them survived an almost death? Favourite for at least the next week. At least. Multiple people survive an almost death? EVERYONES the favourite. The least favourite is the growing grey hairs on his head.
The end of day results are decided by who bothers to wish him goodnight and if all of them have fucked up in some way the past week then Jon (Kent) becomes the automatic favourite until someone cracks a joke that Bruce actually finds funny.
The favourite child changes daily, hourly even, and his kids are aware this system exists and keep trying to crack the code but he always Knows and just smirks smugly.
#batman#dc comics#batfam#bruce wayne#dcu#batfamily#dc robin#jason todd#dick grayson#nightwing#good dad bruce wayne#funny Batman#god I love them#Jon Kent#red hood#red robin#tim drake#damian wayne#batman and robin#robin#robin dc#dc azrael#duke thomas#signal dc#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorrect batman quotes#incorrect dc quotes
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*ok, but what is Jake's stragle?*
#moon knight#moonknight#marc spector#steven grant#ambivert#moon knight text posts#mcu text posts#marvel text posts#moon knight text post#incorrect moon knight#moon knight incorrect quotes#incorrect moon knight quotes#incorrect moon knight quote#moon knight meme#moon knight memes#moon knight system#moon knight show#moon boys#moon knight disney+#moon knight funny#funny moon knight#incorrect mcu quotes#incorrect marvel quotes#mcu memes#marvel memes#ambivert memes#jake lockley#moon knoght edit#marc spector edit#steven grant edit
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every writer knows the pain of having an idea that’s “too good” to write because you know you can’t do it justice
#writing#writeblr#writer problems#writing humor#writers on tumblr#writing memes#writing community#writing struggles#writer life#creative writing#writer things#writing motivation#ao3 writer#writer memes#writing is hard#on writing#writerblr#writers block#writing funny#writer thoughts#fiction writing#writer struggles#writing tips#writing advice#writer woes#writing woes#writer quotes#writing inspiration#plot problems#writer chaos
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#Arcane#arcane s2#arcane season 2#arcane league of legends#arcane season two#caitlyn kiramman#jayvik#arcane viktor#viktor arcane#arcane jayce#jayce arcane#jayce x viktor#ekko#ekko arcane#ekkojinx#ekko league of legends#ekko lol#league of legends#jinx#caitlyn#jinx arcane#powder#caitvi#vi x caitlyn#vi arcane#caitlyn x vi#Tumblr quotes#memes#funny#hes our sunshine boy
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9 year old Dick: If you’re a friendless loser and you know it, clap your hands!
Bruce:
Dick: Clap. Your. Hands.
Bruce: *clap clap*
———
12 year old Jason: HEY YOU!
Jason: HEEEEEY YOU!
Jason: HEY! YOU!
Bruce: It’s not polite to not call people by their names, Robin.
Jason: Nice try, Hey You. I know my mentor’s name.
———
13 year old Tim: You see this coffee, Bruce?
Bruce: Thank you for making this for m-
Tim: This is my coffee. You are having water. Only people who don’t break mugger’s fingers get coffee.
———
Clark: Batman, your Robins are so polite. They must have been a joy to raise.
Bruce, through clenched teeth: Such a joy.
#save bruce from his kids 2k24#my stuff for damian and steph wasnt funny so i deleted them#that’s why theyre not here#batfam#batman#batfamily#dc comics#tim drake#jason todd#incorrect quotes#incorrect batman quotes#bruce wayne#batman incorrect quotes#dick grayson#red hood#richard grayson#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorect quote#incoorect quotes#incorrect dc quotes#incorrect dick grayson#dick grayson incorrect quotes#tim drake incorrect quotes#incorrect tim drake#incorrect batboys quotes#incorrect batbros#incorrect batfam#incorrect bruce wayne#bruce wayne incorrect quotes#jason todd incorrect quotes
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#funny#lol#haha#humor#meme#memes#frog#frogs#art#draw#drawing#artists on tumblr#animals#cute animals#words#quotes#books#books and quotes
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#funny#lol#haha#humor#meme#memes#goth#gothic#art#artists on tumblr#dark academia#light academia#chaos academia#halloween#spooky#books#books and quotes
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#relatable jokes#relatable feeling#relatability#relatable memes#relatable quotes#relatable meme#relatable#lol memes#tumblr memes#memes#lol#relatable lmao#lol lmao rofl#lmao#lolol#funny jokes#funny quotes#funny shit#dad jokes#dumb jokes#this is a joke#jokes#bad jokes#funny stuff#funny#funny content#dank humor#dankest memes#dank meme#tumblr humor
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(Dick coming to collect Jason after he’s been “wrongfully” captured by the justice league while Batman is off world:)
Dick: Listen, Hood might be a criminal, but he’s one of Gotham’s. And he’s my brother.
JL: he killed 80 people in two days.
Dick: …he’s adopted?
Jason, glaring while bound to a chair: SO ARE YOU???
#cannot believe nobody has done this before??#or am I just not looking properly#one of my favourite genre of fics it is so funny lmao#anyhow dick and Jason are so Thor and Loki coded in a way (older brother believing his younger brother is dead but actually he’s not)#dc comics#batman#batfam#bruce wayne#dcu#batfamily#dc robin#jason todd#dick grayson#nightwing#red hood#incorrect dc quotes#incorrect justice league quotes#incorrect batman quotes#incorrect batfamily quotes#marvel#marvel quotes#thor and loki#dick and jason
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Calypso: The stars are beautiful tonight.
Odysseus: You know who else is beautiful?
Calypso (blushing): Who?
Odysseus: Penelope.
#incorrect epic quotes#epic the musical incorrect quotes#epic#epic the musical#epic the wisdom saga#epic: the musical#epic: the wisdom saga#jorge rivera herrans#odysseus#the odyssey#calypso#odyssey#ody#love in paradise#epic musical#odypen#penelope#ody is penny's biggest simp lmao#he's penelope-sexual#odysseus x penelope#kinda funny#as all things should be
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