#“Is my ever-desire.”
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~ Finder's Rebirth ~
Who What We ...B'
#“Is my ever-desire.”#Aiming to come back soon and write a lot of stories#Treasure as always#Dear hearties#Beauty lays before my eyes#May pop in and practice screenies and gifs#Or share character designs#captain kuro solaire#ffxiv#seeker of the sun#final fantasy xiv#screenshots#gif#black cat#pirate#ffxiv gpose#symbolism
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i’m gonna say something controversial yet brave: sexuality labels are a convenient tool we use to define something that is undefinable
#you literally cannot change my mind#if you accept that sexuality is about something other than genitals than you also have to accept that there are going to be millions#of definitions for the same labels#and that’s okay#who you are attracted to cannot possibly ever be described with one word#put weirdo little brains and desires are too complex for that#*our#anyway#i’m right#bork bork!#5k
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why must we network. isn't my kindness and willingness to try to be better everyday enough?
#genuinely accepting i won't ever get anything on my desired field#why does it feel so immoral to me
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Eurydice to Orpheus • Nov. 2023
eurydice’s silence is resounding. you can put anything in that emptiness. —@finelythreadedsky
#p#composition#< so funny to call this ''''''poetry'''''' that i ''''''composed''''''#this is either my biggest hit yet or my biggest miss ever#what love rendered me in verse?#the box of language desires form but not restraint#archive
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Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.
Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!
Binghe is not happy about this.
But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.
When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.
While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.
Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.
#svsss#bingqiu#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain#luo binghe: I don't know why the evil deity toys with me this much but as long as he is amused then he's not killing me#luo binghe: each day he lets me live is another blessing especially since I have no hope of escape#luo binghe: is it for some sick amusement that he drags me to and from the dens of monsters and feigns ignorance?#luo binghe: if I reveal that I know the truth will the ruse end? does he do this with all his sacrifices?#luo binghe: or is he toying with me because he knows that I'm not really a maiden at all? standing on this knife's edge is unbearable#luo binghe: and yet somehow this is the most stable my life has been ever since the death of my poor mother#luo binghe: the world is cruel -- perhaps if I become whatever it is this god desires I might be shielded from more of it for another day#luo binghe: wait I have heavenly demon blood? then... perhaps my dark master considers me a suitable companion thanks to this?#luo binghe: are we two companions in this wretched world? outsiders sharing scorn and thus only able to find solace in each other?#luo binghe: is this what it feels like to care and be cared for? it's been so long I had almost completely forgotten it#shen yuan: gosh these upgrades are getting convoluted I wish I had a skill menu or something#shen yuan: oooh neat a slime! easy exp!
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this image givbes me so much euphoria. i don t know where it comes from or what the original is but its one of my favourite images
#it made me feel this way even before i figured out i was nonhuman.#i dont know if this was the intention of the photographer but when i cast my gaze upon it i am filled with a profound longing for something#that is impossible to attain and yet it feels so /close/ to my desires#one of my favourite bits of photography ever#poplar barks#therian#therianthropy#therian community#otherkin#otherhearted#alterhuman#alterhumanity#nonhuman#dogkin#wolfkin#wolfddogkin#caninekin
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atla renaissance pt 3 calls to me like a siren
#back to my roots#atla#zuko#sokka#toph#avatar the last airbender#avatar#to everyone arguing whether or not it’s accurate to say they do have ODS consider a few things#a) it’s a joke i made while high#b) toph wouldn’t care she would just say shit to piss them off because she’s 12#c) maybe welcome joy into your life. consider taking even a second of a break from whatever compels you to ruin my desire to post#and just chill. because this is and has never been that deep#art#my art#my fan art#fan art#is this the last thing i ever post on tumblr? who knows#im high and its 2am lets get wild
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The hottest couple in Hell 🍎😈
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#lucifer morningstar#hazbin lucifer#lucilith#lucifer x lilith#lilith x lucifer#clip studio paint#my art#digital art#I just wanted to draw them in different outfits 😇#they have carnal desire for each other I just know it they cant help but undress the other with their eyes#lilith reaching out for the apple is the most suggestive thing I've ever drawn so far lol#I AM SO IN LOVE WITH BOTH OF THEM HELP ME#I'm sorry for everyone who follows me for Alastor now I'm having a pretty bad Lucilith brainrot pls bare with me for a while
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GOOD OMENS + Aziraphale being relatable to me
#michael sheen#good omens 2#aziraphale#good omens#sicvita:goodomens#sue's things#aziraphale is me at all times#the love of tea and food and theatre#but also the bone deep weariness and exhaustion#the desire for bad things to just GO AWAY#the burdens of everything past present future#aziraphale i love you still#he's my favourite character ever#s02e03#s02e04#s02e02
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Voice of the Paranoid
Other Designs: Cheated/Hunted/Cold/Contrarian/Smitten/Opportunist/Skeptic/Stubborn
Another design finalized! My goal with Paranoid's outfit was to make it as aggravating as possible for him :)
Here's a demonstration how I imagine his chant working:
Below the cut is the usual - ref without any text + the first time I ever drew Para! Fun fact, he was the first voice I ever drew!!
#i know it doesnt look like his design ever changed much#but theres been multiple drafts of him with longer hair!#but in the end the desire to keep drawing his hair like scraggly baby bird fluff won out#voice of the paranoid#voice of the hero#my art#stp#slay the princess#stp voices
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I got possessed dude, did a line of flour— some crazy shit anyways… Swampcat
Swampcat, Kremy Lecroux x Morning Frost
They both find each other interesting like anatomy wise, drastically different, some “lemme examine you 🤓☝️”
Kremy slowly blinks and Frost gets flustered… that’s the good shit to me man. Purring, Bellows… I SHOOT THEM TWO WITH MY AMERICAN GUN
#my art#legends of avantris#loa#ouaw#once upon a witchlight#kremy lecroux#morning frost#Kremy x frost#frost x Kremy#Kremy Lecroux x Morning Frost#Morning Frost x Kremy Lecroux#swampcat#ouaw swampcat#swampcat ouaw#I think they slay#they’re apathetic towards eachother leaning on dislike#I dunno I think I’m crazy#I’m being so real— No throwing clothes silly Billy— their foreplay is folding eachother’s clothes cuz that’s A SHOW OF CARE OKAY BRO#I THINK THAT’S SWEET#there’s moment of tenderness and I think that shit goes so hard#freak 4 freak#demi 4 demi#also like— Frost is def more experienced when it comes to the devil’s tango but also I think the juxtaposition of Kremy being “bruh idk#Kremy to me can charm a person and get a free drink but I don’t think ever went past that cuz he never had the desire to#he’s so demi to me#he would definitely be out of his element but liek he’s enthusiastic okay#Kremy is like an onion layered and every time you peel a layer back you get more Kremy and I think that’s the thrill of it#he would be interesting#I’m speaking from an aroace perspective— like how a scientist would see bacteria under a microscope#tw suggestive
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The fact that this is the same woman is so symbolic
#motherhood#yeah no wonder he was DISGUSTED by hinself#like he couldn’t wait to be the bane of existence#his childhood desire/nature manifested itself into a twisted really yh i said it before but my o my#Eren is one of the modt complex characters I’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing#Aot end#the end#eren jaeger#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#eren#aot#eren yeager#anime
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all I wanted was to save them... (ID in alt)
#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#tw blood#let me know if there's any other tags i need to use!!! not sure if it counts as gore#ruporas art#*vash voice* YOU ARE NOT WRONG/LOST WOLFWOOD!!!!!!#i think very often about ch 49 where wolfwood thought it was fr over for him for that brief moment. he was already bearing with so much#fatigue that it wasn't going to be enough for him to fight back properly.. and ough... augh..... for the first time after bearing that cros#someone saved him. someone saved himmmm AUGHHHH <-- guy who can't be normal about it even though its been 7 months since i read it#but he's suffered alone for so long and continued to do so because it's all he ever knew in those short years#and its devastating. his one and only desire was simple and it was still difficult for him to reach T_T#anyway... i love him... holds him tenderly in my palms
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@ladyofsilverr's Shadow's Hold - Black and Gold Recolor (x)
#thank you mike for indulging my desires#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#dragonageedit#gamingedit#videogameedit#dragon age rook#rook#oc: lucerna mercar#my edit#my fav armour ever
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the duo ever
#in posting this to give you guys whiplash after that last one :))#THEY CAN BE BOTH.#utmv#undertale#sans aus#dust sans#killer sans#murder sans#bad sanses#ut au#traditional scribbles#SPEED#murder time trio#well 2/3#something new au#dusttale#sans#kist#if desired#hehe#the duo ever#my art
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mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
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