#‘we need to talk about how forcing a sex binary on us will hurt ALL gnc ppl! 😱’ yeah that’s not new actually. that’s not a CHANGE being made

[relaxxattack]

imagine reading a bill that says word for word “we NEED to eradicate trans women and push them out of any sort of shelter they might be seeking in order to make sure they are systemically exterminated” and then going on tumblr and posting about how anyone other than trans women should be centered in this conversation, actually

[antiterf]

This post was originally going to be along the lines of "I relate too much to intersex people and that's why this blog has gotten more adamant on intersex rights" but felt like it would be missing a lot of context.

Basically, it started when I saw intersex people struggling to get people to respect their gender identity. The response to that experience practically matching the ones that trans people use ("I'm more than my genitalia"). It was blatant to the point where I couldn't avoid it, it was like a slap to the face of "why are we so similar here yet I barely see any discussion of intersex issues or rights?"

Then I found relatability in other ways: the struggle with bodily autonomy (x2 with being disabled) and struggling with how people see your body as gross or unusual being big ones.

I was interested in finding out more about how society treats sex variance because of my experience as a trans person who had way too much internalized transphobia early on. Where the want to transition alone was met with overwhelming self hatred. It's an experience I've talked about a lot, but I don't often see conversation about within trans groups or spaces. I refuse to think I'm the only one that went through something like that, because I have seen others talk about it if rarely. But also because I know those feelings didn't come from the void. I must have picked up something that made me believe it was so wrong to want to transition despite never knowing about trans people directly. There must be something about the society I was raised in that influenced me to feel so strongly.

In that I found intersex experiences around being forced into a strict binary incredibly valuable in understanding what was going on with me. All our lives, we are shown two correct bodies with no acceptable variance. To the point where people with said variance are forced out of it or hidden and shamed. All the while knowing how different our actual experiences are, and getting more and more upset around how the same group I'm able to relate to and find comfort in is hurt in shame and silence.

I've ultimately grown to see intersex people as family like I do other trans people. And while my care and protectiveness are important, I need to still monitor myself and make sure I don't overstep or get some sort of savior complex. My emotions are important, they are ultimately what drive me to act. I can't let them run wild with determining what I say and do though, I need to think it through. And it's obvious when I say it, but I think a lot of people struggle with overstepping when they care a lot. Sometimes I feel like it can also make me too hesitant, but I guess I just have to try and find a good mix.

I also want to be clear that I know people can care and be compassionate without this process. I find myself feeling compassion without this feeling of relatability a lot. Again, I feel like my emotions and these feelings help a lot, but they can also hinder, and it doesn't make me morally superior. I want to add this because ableism and neuronormativity aren't that tolerable to me either.

But yeah, I relate to intersex people a lot and that's why so much intersex stuff is on the otherwise trans focused blog.

[x31043]

I guess im just bothered that when youre born an called a woman youre then constantly told to shut upforever,but when the opposite is true youre constantly encouraged to speak up.Youre ridiculed for not doing it, but to me thats different than being hurt or even killed FOR doing it. That means that childhood sucks. Adolescence sucks. Youre really in a place of forced subservience for your whole existence. You have to break out of that so hard. Youre physically smaller. You are trained to ignore yourself until you are broken. You are trained to be something that someone uncaring will shove themselves in and take, take over. You are literally raised to be an object to be used and discarded. That is UNIVERSAL. I know some people epxerience that without being born & assigned women, but for those of us who are this is literally a universal experience. You are fucking made to be a fucking sex robot and a servant and an agreeable nodding nothing whose opinions dont matter and nothing else. You are TRAINED in social cues and spend your whole life noticing every little thing and forcibly keeping all your opinions inside. Everyone should be lifting our voices up!!! Trans people should be screaming up at the sky not at others to keep their voices down!!

This literally makes me want to scream. Women are not treated better than men. Why would trans men be treated better than trans women? Where are you seeing that, where??? They have SPECIFIC, DIFFERENT experienes and also many that are the same! Because its a fucking spectrum, remember that discourse? When youre trans it doesnt work all neatly in two categories like that. I look like a trans women. Many trans women look like me. Many of us are non-binary and our gender is basically the same regardless of how we were brought up. Why can you ask me my genitals now and if i dont answer i get canceled. what the FUCK is that. Why has it become like this. It started as “our experiences are different, we need a space to talk about the ways they are not the same.” and now its-- disclose whether youre dmab or dfab to be a good ally to trans women. We have to talk about it ALL THE TIME. WE have to go based off genital differences to determine how you are privileged or not. That’s not the fucking way to move our community forward or to connect as individulas. And Guess what?? Trans women don’t even want it!!!

TME is a term that trans women made for VERY SPECIFIC CIRCUMSTANCES. It can be applied to SPECIFIC CIRCUMSTANCES which require a very nuanced and exact language. I may be fucked up for saying this but There are times when trans mascs and butches face a speciifc, different type of transphobia to trans women, too. And they deserve a space to talk about it, too, while still DEFENDING trans fems from terfs. This seems fucking obvious to me. when its white ppl it all pales against transphobic racism anyway.

And that’s the long and short of it, bc trans women arent the ones I see taking about TME. They arent the ones actively claiming they have worse epxeriences with gender and dysphoria. Thats all like cute Nonbinary transmascs typically who are white telling me my experience was a lot easier than others in my community. And to me thats a part of this fucked up socialization--always talk youself down, and hold others like you accountable for reaching beyond their capacity. Other DFAB people telling me to shut up about my transness is fucking ironic in a way that doesn’t make me want to laugh. You were told to shut up your whole life, so now you’re going to put that on me?? Why are we doing this in the first place then?? WHy if not to reclaim the voice that was stolen from us?!

My genitals are thought of as absolutely inconceivable. The 20 pounds of weight on my chest is thought of as a dirty thing I literally need to press and constrain into tight and uncomfortable shapes or I will be violated when I go outside. Do you have any idea what that does to a kid?  I bet you know what it does to an adult. It’s a very similar experience! We need a space to talk about this without being called terfs or told to check our TME privilege. I am going to one day be a man with a beard in a dress. Whats not clicking?

[ethicallysaucedlibraryfaggot]

At this point we need to accept that our language will never be perfect to fully capture the incalculable scope of our experiences. But we HAVE to keep talking.

I sat down with my transfem friend who I’d previously had tension with about trans oppression and how it affects transfems vs transmascs. Turns out, we have basically identical experiences when it comes to trying to share our observations of transphobia.

I will never know what it’s like to be transfem just like she will never know what it’s like to be transmasc. But we have so much more in common than we have differences.

Enforcing some kind of fucked up oppression binary on trans people hurts ALL of us. Even if you do it in the name of protecting trans women. It hurts them too. There is no inherent evil to any sex, gender, expression, hormone, genitalia, sexuality.

Yall aren’t gonna like this one but as someone who was a “woman” for a big chunk of my life. Woman are active participants in patriarchy. They raise men, they instil rape culture in their children of any sex. They condition their partners to fit into toxic masculinity. They side with their friends over their victims. They call the cops on poc men. Women have the exact same capacity for evil as men.

Working class men are our allies. Radfem ideology will teach us that we are trapped by our biology. That women are inherently victims and men are monsters. There is no rescue from that ‘reality’. In order to be ‘trans inclusive’, it makes trans men into the monstrous enemy too. It forces non binary trans people back into a binary based on the aesthetics of the very patriarchy that is purportedly against.

Radical feminism does nothing but enforce the binary and instil fear and division in the very people it claims to serve.

To be poetic about my ultimate point: every binary of oppression is in fact a reflection of the ultimate binary that must be erased. Bourgeoisie & proletariat. Every single struggle points back to capitalism and its enforcer, imperialism.

N.b. if you find yourself around those weird dude bro communists who are weird about minorities, find better communists (I should know all my comrades are trans and cool)

[mazhazalotofthoughts]

No one is saying Harry has to come out to as queer. He’s gonna be queer whether he comes out, tweets about it, sits down with Oprah and does a tell all or stay in the closet forever. But, that doesn’t mean that he gets a platform to speak out and give opinions about queer issues that directly impact queer people when his perspective is that of a cis/het man. It’s like, say I non binary person, before I came out and was therefore seen as a cis woman started talking about how gender is pointless and overrated. Obviously that invalidates other trans people and even tho I’m trans, if at the time I said those things I wasn’t out, they would hurt people and cause offence.

It just means that people, of all marginalized communities need to be mindful of the communities we claim and how we interact with them before speaking about important issues. That’s all. No one is forcing H to come out, it’s not about that, it’s just that, while he’s not out, making statements about what he thinks is good gay sex on film, while it may have been well intentional, offended a lot of people.

Because how would you like it if your straight friend started saying that the gay sex they watch is too rough for their liking. I’d bet you’d be offended. Why? Because straight people don’t get to decide what good queer representation looks like because it’s not their community that’s being represented.

So while I know that queer people don’t need to come out, and that Harry doesn’t owe us anything, in this society it is the standard that queer people have to come out. Especially public figures. If you don’t tweet it, you’re straight. And I know that fucked up. It’s really really fucked up, but that doesn’t change reality. And that reality is that Harry Styles will be perceived as cis/het by the general public until he tells us blatantly otherwise.

And knowing that, means knowing that what he says will be taken as the opinion of a straight man, which I know, sucks, but it’s true. And when those opinions are on a queer specific subject, Harry’s words will be seen as him talking about something he has no right to talk about.

And again, he doesn’t need to come out in order to voice his opinions, he can say whatever about whatever, but, that doesn’t mean the GP is gonna see it as him, a queer man speaking about something that impacts him personally. They won’t because that’s not his public persona or narrative right now. So when the GP and his queer fans get frustrated with him it comes from a place of constantly living in a world where their identities are prosecuted. It comes from a place of anger, that this straight man gets to talk over them, gets to decide what good representation is for their community. They have a right to be angry because if all they’ve seen is the recent tabloids of H and O holding hands, walking down a street every other day, or listening to WS, Carolina, Cherry, Cinema, and all the media just pushing his heterosexuality, it’s easy to understand why they’d think he’s straight. You can’t blame them for believing what Jeff has been forcing down their throats for the past 6 years.

So yes, fans are angry and disappointed, but the Larries and real fans aren’t asking him to come out, we know the truth. We know about the closeting and how much abuse he’s suffered in the industry and how hard he’s fought to be himself. We know all this, but they don’t, and right now they see another white, cis/het popstar profiting off of a marginalized community.

That’s all I have to say.

[eulangelo]

callout for @genderfluidlucifer

google docs

tw for transmisogyny + TERFs + emotional manipulation

Transmisogyny

Lucifer is a huge transmisogynist who will complain 24/7 about how TERFs hurt the ace community, but the moment @randomclustermissile , a trans girl (who is not an exclusionist at all) tries to point out transmisogyny in inclusionist circles (in the most vague and general way possible, without pointing fingers nor calling anyone names) Lucifer will immediatly jump to block her and so they did with me (another inclusionist) and i have to suppose to everyone else who agreed with that post, even arriving to vagueing about us in private group chats to suggest that we were “sympathizing with exclusionists”. all because we dared point out transmisogyny in inclusionist circles. lucifer is TME but apparently they think they’re the authority on TERFs and their talking points but actual trans women are not, according to them, since this is the stuff that they would go and spew to other people. (screenshots from @enbyoctoling​)

here’s more examples of Lucifer (again, a transmasc person) going deep in detail about how according to them, TERFs/SWERFs hate aro/ace people and are an active threat to us

1. link

[Image ID: Three screenshots of a post by Genderfluidlucifer. The first screenshot is of a paragraph that reads, "Hey. So I can actually answer this. Anon your commentary about how you thought terfs would approve of sex repulsed aces is sort of it. Except...not. Basically terfs hate ace people for not wanting sex in the approved by terfs way. Terfs are actually extremely interested in [forcing] amatonormativity onto everyone. Because for as sex negative as terfs are...they don't want to actually acknowledge or change the fact that amatonormativity is at the root cause of rape culture and misogyny."

The second screenshot is a zoomed in section of the post that reads, "So yeah no I have NO idea where exclus allies are getting this idea from that terfs would even remotely care about the sexual rights of ace people. Terfs generally hate any sexualities in the LGBTQ+ acronym that aren't LGB because they can't force a gender binary onto those sexualities. At least, not as easily. That's why it's actually a massive sign of someone who doesn't call themselves a terf being a crypto terf if they use the term LGB in a positive manner. Along with the term SGA, as it is deliberately exclusive of nonbinary and not inherently SGA centric queer-aligned sexualities. /END ID]

link to the full post, these are just excerpts but the whole thing is just a very long rant about how TERFs hate ace people and so on (i think it’s worth noticing that although the actual post is kinda long, trans women are never once brought op in a conversation about TERFs issues and the only time transmisogyny is mentioned is not relevant to the conversation)

2. link

[Image ID: A screenshot of a reblog by genderfluidlucifer. The original poster is nothorses. It reads, "Because apparently I have to say it: Testosterone is not a 'violent' hormone. It doesn't make you 'more aggressive' or a worse person, it doesn't make you 'dangerous,' or 'toxic.' Transmascs do not need to be 'warned of the dangers of T.' We do not need to spend our transitions terrified that we're going to become a danger to those around us - that HRT is going to turn us into a monster.

Everyone experiences mood swings during hormonal shifts (pregnancy, menstruation, menopause, estrogen HRT, etc.) and while you might have grumpy moments or feel anger/frustration that you need to learn to handle differently, that doesn't make you a bad person.

Testosterone can change the way you access/process emotions somewhat, but if you're already thoughtful about how you handle your feelings and treat others, you're going to be fine. It's normal to lash out on occasion, by accident, then apologize and work to do better. It doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone on HRT is prone to this, and everyone experiencing hormonal changes is prone to this.

Getting HRT should be positive and affirming; you should not have to spend your entire transition terrified of becoming a monster."

The post then has a reblog by captainlordauditor that reads, "The big danger of T is that needle ouchy." /END ID]

here’s them reblogging from known transmisogynist user @nothorses (once again, the irony that a post about how testosterone is seen as the "aggressive hormone" does not mention transfem at all which are literally the main victims of this rethoric in the first place)

3. link (1), link (2)

[Image ID: Two screenshots of posts by genderfluidlucifer. The first screenshot reads, "Queer exclus: We're not repackaging terf rhetoric! Saying that is transmisogynistic! Also queer exclus: Remove the plus from LGBT!" and has tags that say, "I will pay these people to grow some god damn self awareness. Imagine being this dense. Queer discourse." The post has 15 notes.

The second screenshot reads, "Honestly it is so stupid and frustrating to see ace exclus continue to deny that the ace discourse was started by terfs. Proof was given countless times. And a big name terf like galesofnovember even admitted to starting it. Those of you who demand proof but ignore all of this never wanted proof to begin with." and is tagged with, "ace discourse. The post has 38 notes. /END ID]

heres another two post of theirs conflating TERFs with ace exclusionism

4. link

[Image ID: A screenshot of a reblogged post by furbearingbrick. The original poster is boxlizard, Lucifer's old account. The original post reads, "By the way for people still in denial about it, here's galesofnovember, a terf, admitting that she intended to start the ace exclus movement. She's taking credit for it. Normally if the victims of this behavior weren't ace/aro or other queer identities y'all be ready to rightfully lynch her. But since it's us, y'all just still wanna stamp your feet and go, 'Nuh uh!' instead of acknowledging facts." The part that says, "admitting that she intended to start the ace exclus movement" is a link to a galesofnovember post.

There is then a reblogged addition from furbearing brick that reads, "archived versions of the receipts" and has two links to the webarchive. The tags read, "Bringing this back since it's apparently still relevant. Terfism mention. Aphobia mention. Queerphobia mention. Blocklist." and has 1,455 notes. /END ID]

this is their post that ive already talked about but basically they found a 52 notes post made by a TERF in 2012 and this one person said "i dont know why i dont get to be the princess of the anti-ace-brigade" and apparently they are convinced that this means TERFs started the ace exclusionism movement and that this is one of their goals. which is insane when TERFs in real life only care about making life miserable for transfem people first and foremost.

5.link

[Image ID: A screenshot of a reblog by genderfluidlucifer. The original poster is yu-gay-fudo. It reads, “Just in case you happen to be unaware, some of the “radfem lite” they post to warm you up to their rhetoric, just off the top of my head:

- Ace/aro exclusionism

- Bi exclusionism or claims that bi people are “less queer” bc of “straight passive privilege”

- Saying you have to be dysphoric to identify as transInvalidating nonbinary people

- Calling queer a slur regardless of context, saying people can’t identify as queer, and saying that it can’t be reclaimed

- “Mogai hell”, “kweer”, or otherwise mocking less common labels and claiming they are “just cishets who want to feel special”

- Excluding sex workers from feminist discussions or claiming that sex work is inherently evil

- Basically anyone who thinks they can determine what other people identify as”. The tags read, "queerphobia tw. twerfs tw. no id." and has 70,727 notes. It was reblogged on March 22nd, 2021 /END ID]

another example of conflating radfems to things that, while wrong, have little to nothing to do with them because being a radfem, again, is something very specific that has all to do with transfem oppression.

Emotional manipulation

Lucifer has done nothing but block, break boundaries, spread lies and vague about people, some of which were even mutuals with them knowing they would see the posts. when confronted about it Lucifer's only answer was "just say you hate me and block me" but they actually ended up blocking everyone first, making it impossible for anyone to set some boundaries with them or even just to calmly confront them about anything.

[proof: Io(popncourse) and Lucifer had a disagreement in a shared discord server, which prompted Lucifer to vague Io in a vent post. Io confronted them, as being vagued is one of buns triggers, to which Lucifer initially agreed to delete the vent post, but then proceeded to victimize themself and immediatly blocked Io. later on, Jude(malewifedeckard) was confronted by Lucifer, then after Jude told them “I’m worried that you’ll vague me just like you did with Io” they proceeded to block Jude and vagued about him too. when Io made a post (which was not a callout, it was just bun setting buns boundaries) explaining what Lucifer did, Lucifer immediatly jumped to victimize themself, acting like they were being called out and straight-up lying, even going so far as to say that no one tried to hear them out, which is a blatant lie if you consider the aforementioned Io and Jude’s attempts at doing so, with Lucifer immediatly blocking and cutting ties with the both of them. ] 

(screenshots taken by @popncourse and @malewifedeckard)

as seen in the proof above Lucifer’s behaviour is not ok because they don’t accept any kind of confrontation and immediatly jump to blocking, and after blocking, they'd immediatly go and vague about the people who confronted them pacificly, spreading more lies and painting themself as the victim and even arriving to say “no one hears me out at all” which is simply not something you can say when you block people who are trying to hear you out in the first place.

this is by no means an invitation to go and harass them, send them hate or anything like that. i absolutely don’t want anything even remotely hateful or negative to be sent their way after this post. 

this post was only made because:

1. as an ace person who fully supports the inclusion of aspec identities in the lgbt+ community i don’t want to support an enviroment that costantly downplays transmisogynistic oppression in order to be taken seriously. there are hundreds of ways to make aspec activism without acting like we(as in TME aspecs)are the victims of a system that seeks for the annihilation of transfemenine people in real life everyday. i especially don’t want to support TME individuals who act transfem-friendly but then block any transfem who tries to speak on transmisogyny without a second thought.

2. Lucifer’s behaviour has hurt two friends of mine and i don’t want to associate with someone who actively breaks people’s boundaries without taking accountability when messing up.

3. i cannot associate with someone who spreads lies about me accusing me of sympathizing with exclusionists all while having me blocked so that i can’t see it nor defend me. they complain about people not hearing them out but they’re the very first person who does not try to hear people out, and instead jumps to spread baseless rumors. this is not someone i can nor want to associate with. 

(image descriptions provided by @malewifedeckard)

[gaysimpsstuff]

Hawks Getting Y/n Pregnant After A Rut

This was a request but I can’t find the ask where it was requested, but it certainly was requested.

Genre: fluff

Type: headcannon/drabble

Word Count: 1.7K Words

Warnings: pregnancy, mentions of sex, mentions of rut, children, vomiting, Keigo being a bit of an asshole, doctors, mentions of sensory overload, mentions of blood, crying, reader calls Kei ‘daddy’ as a joke once,

Other: I did my best to keep it gender neutral, so there aren’t any gendered pronouns used for the reader, so they could be non binary or trans masc. Also, I do plan on never getting pregnant and have never been pregnant before so I really have no experience and no qualifications to be writing on this subject so let’s just see how this turns out.

Fluff Taglist: @smolchildfangirl @combat-wombatus @mandalorian-baby-bird @waffleareniceandfluffy @catcherisvibin @thesubtlewhore @popcatx0

“Kei.”

“Nope.”

“Kei.”

“I said no.”

“I said yes.”

“Well too damn bad. I’m not carrying you.”

“It’s your damn fault I can’t walk, you fucked me for five days straight this time around, I literally can’t feel my legs. You will carry me.”

“Except it isn’t my fault I have ruts, I’m not in control.”

“It was your dick fucking me, Kei. No one else’s, so it’s your fault.”

This was a normal occurrence in the springtime, right after Keigo’s ruts. The small fight over your capabilities. 

“You can walk to the bathroom yourself.” Keigo was in bed next to you, arms crossed. “It’s literally been a whole ass week.”

“You fucked me for five days!” you exclaimed. “Do you really expect me to be up and running the same amount of time after that?”

“Yes!” Keigo exclaimed. “It’s not like I hurt you or anything, you barely did anything the whole time, you’re fine!” 

You leaned across the bed to glare him in the eyes, examining his slitted pupils for any sign that he might back down. You found none.

“Ughhhh fiiiiiine I’ll walk.” you groaned, throwing the blankets aside and standing up. Your legs were still sore, but you could maneuver them well enough. “Asshole.” you grumbled

“Oh yes, I’m the asshole.” he smirked, sitting back. You rolled your eyes, pausing for a moment to hold onto the edge of the bed.

“Something doesn’t feel right...” you muttered. 

“Seriously, Y/n? I said I wasn’t carrying you so-”

“No, Kei I’m not joking, I feel sick.” 

“I’m sure you’re just hungry.” Keigo waved you off, seemingly uncaring about your situation. You shot him another glare that he totally missed. Suddenly, you felt something move up in your body, and you launched yourself into the bathroom to crouch over the toilet. 

“Babe?” Keigo sat up in bed, trying to peek into the bathroom. He blanched when he heard you gasp, and then a loud splat noise. He was on his feet in an instant, crouching next to you as you wiped your mouth with toilet paper. 

“I fuckin told you...” you grumbled, and he rubbed your back worriedly.

“Boy who cried wolf!” he exclaimed “I’m sorry, baby, are you okay?”

“Do I look okay?” you snapped, and he frowned. “I’m sorry, no, I’m not okay- hold up- more’s coming-”

You threw up the next day too. 

And the day after that. 

One the fourth day, Keigo was panicking, insisting he take you to the doctors.  

-

“I keep telling him I’m fine, I probably just caught a stomach bug or something.” you shrugged, sitting on the uncomfortable table bed thingie inside the doctor’s office. Keigo was in the chair behind you, holding your hand.

Not for your comfort, but for his.

He hated the sterile smell of the doctors, hated the smooth white walls with charts hanging from them, too bright lights stabbing at his eyes, and the smooth way the doctors spoke was all too similar to his handlers from the commission.

You wanted to get the visit over with and get Keigo out of here before he went into sensory overload, you knew just how much he hated hospitals and doctors, and while it was sweet that he would force himself to go through it for you, you didn’t want him to.

“I keep telling them they’re not fine,” Keigo grumbled. “Look at them, they don’t look fine and I keep telling them something’s wrong but-”

“Please don’t start to fight in my office,” the doctor sighed, she glanced between you and Keigo. “I understand Hawks goes through ‘ruts’ as you would call them in the springtime, and during that time he is much more fertile than usual. Have the two of you just finished one of those ruts?” 

“Yes,” you answered quickly. “It lasted five days this time.” Keigo nodded.

“DO you think maybe I got them sick?” Kei worried, squeezing your hand tighter.

“Keigo have you ever heard of someone getting sick after sex and not- oh oh, Doctor are you implying-”

“Yes, I am, you should probably get tested for it. We can do a blood test, they’re more accurate.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.” 

“I’ll send you to the Hematologist,” 

“The what?” 

“Blood doctor, Keigo. I need a blood test.”

“So I did get you sick!”

“Oh my god Keigo, no, just- we’ll see what happens.”

“Is it normal that I’m confused?” 

“Unfortunately, it’s very normal.”

-

Keigo continued to be confused and worried for the next few days, at least until you got an email. 

“Why’s this one so important?” Keigo pouted. “And why can’t I read it with you?”

“It’s the result of the blood test.” you explained, clicking on the email and scrolling past the formalities to get to the result

“So basically it’s the result of whether my cum is toxic or not...” Keigo was laying on the bed near your feet while you were sat up on your laptop.

“Your cum isn’t toxic, Kei.” you chuckled, reading through the email. “I would have gotten ‘sick’ much sooner if your cum was toxic.”

“How do you know my cum didn’t just- suddenly become toxic?” he exclaimed

“Keigo. Stop. Your cum is not toxic.” you sighed, finally reaching the results.

Your lips lifted up and you started to practically buzz with excitement. You cupped your hands over your mouth and squealed. Keigo lifted his head up, staring at you in confusion.

“Babe? What happened?” His wings twitched as you shut the laptop, setting it aside and flinging yourself at him. Your arms squeezing his midsection tight. “Ah shit- Y/n what’s going on? Why are you so happy?” He sat up, pulling you into his lap. “I’m not against you smiling and cuddling me but I am still very much confused.”

“Keigo, I’m pregnant!” you squealed, holding onto his shoulders, your face was stretched wide in a bright smile “We’re gonna have a baby!”

“Wait- what?” His face immediatelty lifted 

“Yes! We’re gonna have a kid!”

“Holy shit, really?” He hands flew to your stomach “My kid is in there?” He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth to keep it from quivering, his hands were shaking against your stomach.

“Yes, Keigo. You’re gonna be a dad!” He let out a warbled sort of chirp, pressing his face into your neck. His breath fanned out over your skin, and you could feel moisture against it. 

“I’m so happy!” he whispered, voice wavering slightly “Fuck I’m so happy with you, I- I’m gonna be a good dad for our little chick.” his hand rubbed circles against your belly. You traced your hand up to rub Keigo’s back.

“They’re lucky to have someone like you to be their dad, Kei. I love you, and I know you’ll raise our child right.” His grip in you tightened

“I- I can’t I’m just- fuck words can’t describe it, I-” He  pulled away from your neck and pressed his lips against yours, you closed your eyes and kisses back, enjoying his passion. It was like however close you could be wasn’t close enough, and he needed to just be with you.

You broke the kiss a few minutes later, pulling away to cup his face. His golden eyes were full of tears, and his smile was the brightest it had ever been. 

“I love you...” he whispered. “And I already love our kid.” You stroked his cheek with your finger, speechless. You kisses his nose, giggling a little.

“We’re gonna be a family,” you told him

“I can’t wait!” 

-

After that, Keigo just couldn’t keep his hands off you, especially your belly, even while it was small, he just couldn’t keep himself from holding your belly and talking to the baby.

“Goodnight, Y/n~” Keigo pressed a kiss to your cheek, a hand rubbing circles onto your growing belly. “And goodnight Akina!” 

“Keigo, we don’t know if it’s gonna be a girl, so don’t name it just yet!” you chuckled.

“But Akina’s just perfect, if it’s a girl then she’d be a lovely spring flower” he cooed, scooching down to your belly.

“Keigo, I’d be concerned if our baby was born in the springtime, that’s way late!”

“Well she was conceived in springtime!” Keigo exclaimed, pressing his cheek to your belly “Weren’t you, Akina? My beautiful daughter~” 

“You don’t know if it’s your daughter or your son yet, Kei! Seriously!” you laughed at the way he spoke to your belly, running your hands through his golden tresses. 

“Well if it’s a boy, what do you think his name should be?” he asked

“I was thinking Hajime, I mean this is a whole new beginning for both of us.”

“Hajime...” Keigo breathed, pressing a kiss to your belly. “My darling child, my Hajime, my Akina, my perfect child I already love you~” 

You buried your face in your hands, giggling, Keigo was just too precious sometimes, you couldn’t wait to have his and your child.

“Oh! Keigo I felt something!” you exclaimed, Keigo sat up, pressing his hand against your belly. 

“Was it a-”

“Yes! They’re kicking!” you placed your hand over Keigo’s, moving it so he could feel the small bursts of pressure. You heard him suck in a breath, vibrating with happiness.

“They’re so strong!” he was beaming with pride, feeling his child kick up against his hand. “I’m going to keep them so safe, they won’t cry like I have, like you have, they’ll know true happiness.” 

“We’ll protect them, and when our little birdie is ready, then one day they can fly away...”

“But we’ll always be there when they need us.” Keigo pressed himself against you, kissing your neck “We’ll all be so happy!”

“Keigo, that tickles!”

“I still can’t believe it, that little chick will call me ‘dad!’” 

“What, is me calling you ‘daddy’ not enough?” you joked and he laughed, pressing one more kiss to your skin before rolling onto his stomach and resting his head on your shoulder

“I love you Y/n, I love you Akina, Hajime,” he murmured, you settled into the blankets next to him, letting him cover your body with one of his wings as you absentmindedly wrapped an arm around his body.

“I love you too, Keigo. And you, my child.” 

Oh my gosh

I wanna do a part two

But like- angsty?

Idfk this is just v fun-

It’s either gonna be fluffy Hajime/Akina being born and living life to the fullest

A miscarriage

Or maybe the reader dies and Keigo has to raise the child alone- which could very well result in Keigo abusing the child- AHHH SO MANY POSSIBILITIESS

[transmasc-wizard]

Hi! Sorry to bother but could you explain what transandrophobia is please? /g

deeeeeeeeeeeep sigh (not at you. simply at what I may be inviting to my inbox). it's not a bother! I just hope i don't get death threats now!

Also: I am in math class so this may take awhile to answer lol

Anyway! so, first of all, there is controversy around this word's creator (idk who he even is? but there is). I have not looked into it, because it's about NSFW things, which as a sex-repulsed ace minor, I do not want to look at. But I do believe that regardless of a creator, a word can be good--look at comphet. It's a very important word for a lot of lesbians, including trans lesbians, but the creator was a TERF.

From what I have seen, transandrophobia is very basic: it's literally just specific oppression faced by transmascs, for being transmasc. It can also be our specific oppression intersection of misogyny and transphobia that we face, which is often very different from transfems'.

It's also been called transmisandry, transandromisia, transmascphobia, and virilmisia. Basically all of them work; I use transandrophobia and transandromisia for the very basic reason that they're the easiest for me to pronounce & remember how to spell (so is virilmisia, but that is a very unknown word).

I don't like transmisandry as a word, because it very much mirrors transmisogyny, which implies transandrophobia and transmisogyny are opposites; they aren't. In fact, transfems can be affected by transandrophobia too! See: the UK's HRT restriction laws, which were largely (though not wholly) put into place to stop Poor Little Girls(TM) from Ruining Their Bodies, but also hurts transfems & transneutral people who need HRT.

A lot of people seem to think that systemic transandrophobia existing means systemic misandry/androphobia exists, but it doesn't! Words mean things, that's why the trans on the front of the word is crucial to it's existence. (/nm at anyone who thought the implication tho.)

Some examples of transandrophobia are:

the whole "confused little girls" infantilization thing (see also: "confused lost lesbians")

the "traitor to womanhood" idea and "choosing to become an oppressor" idea of what transmascs are

the attempt to "save" transmascs by radfems (save = force through conversion therapy)

the extreme invisibility faced by transmascs & especially trans men (which is fed into by the hypervisibility of transfems. neither hypervisibility or invisibility are privileges)

cis MLM spaces' conversations about "fujoshis" can be very transandrophobic (acting like trans mlm are just girls with fetishes)

treating trans men as "men lite"/less men

the whole fetish-y "i would date a trans man because they're Men Who Understand" thing

the demonization of very masculine trans men/mascs and of trans men of colour (the latter especially often get ignored in conversations about demonization)

the fetishization and infantilization of femme/androgynous trans men & transmascs

treating butches as bad! This is an example of transandrophobia that can hurt transfems and cis women, too--the idea that being a masculine woman is bad can oft be born from transandrophobic ideals (and transmisogynistic ones, this crosses over a bit)

"kill all men including trans men", as if trans men have anything close to the systemic power that cis men do

in general, assuming that just because a white straight thin binary fully transitioned trans man can sometimes access male privilege, all transmascs can

also, see: "transmascs are transitioning to gain male privilege" (which doesn't work for a variety of reasons???)

the extremely feminine language across the abortion debate, "if men could get abortions they'd be free", the refusal to stop gendering quote-unquote "women's healthcare".

this is just all off the top of my head, but I hope that's a comprehensive enough list to let people know what I'm talking about.

Additionally: If anyone tries to play Oppression Olympics here (in any direction), they get blocked. We gain nothing from splitting hairs over Who Has It The Most Bad, and as an ace it reminds me of "aphobia isn't bad enough so you don't matter".

Additionally additionally: I'd love to hear other trans people's experiences of transandrophobia, to better explain. (This includes transfems and transneutrals who have been targeted by transandrophobia.)

Additionally additionally additionally: @transmascissues and @stopcannibalizingourown are two blogs that post a lot of good stuff about transandrophobia! (stopcannibalizingourown in particular has a lot of good transphobia discussions in general, about all it's forms.)

TLDR: Transandrophobia is just a word to describe specific oppression of transmascs, just like ceterophobia (discrimination against nonbinary people) and transmisogyny (discrimination against trans women/transfems).

[sotheywrotestories]

The They Them Agenda

Request;

you know it :) maybe an enby reader x bucky? He's really confused by their pronouns and some fluffy explanation? ooooo or their first time sleeping in the same bed and maybe mentions of a binder and explaining what that is?

- @mad-malory

(Sorry this was so late)

Pairings; Bucky x Nonbinary Reader

Warnings; None, although there are mentions of a chest binder :)

***

Bucky grew up in a different time. Not that he necessarily had a hard time adjusting to modern times, but he wasn’t caught up with all the dynamics of the world.

Which is why he always thought (Y/N) was a group of people the Avengers out before Steve introduced them to Bucky.

“Buck, this is (Y/N), they’re from our downtown office,” Steve presented (Y/N) to Bucky, who, in fact, was only one person.

“Hi…nice to meet you,” Bucky grimaced. Not because (Y/N) had given him any reason to, but because he was so awkward.

“Hi, Bucky!” (Y/N) reached their hand out to Bucky. “It’s so nice to finally meet you! Steve talks about you all the time.”


Bucky tried to let his genuine smile come through this time.

“Likewise…I was under the impression that you were a group..but you know how Steve is,” Bucky huffed a bit.

(Y/N) gave Bucky a rather strange look. One of those “no-I-don’t-really-get-what-you-mean” looks.

“Right…well, I’m gonna go move in.” (Y/N) turned to Steve. “Thanks for letting me stay here while we rebuild, Stevie.”

(Y/N) gave one last smile to Bucky, then went on their way.

“Buck, ask (Y/N) about their pronouns when you have the chance,” Steve placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. “It took some getting used to, don’t worry.”

Bucky was even more confused. Not only was (Y/N) not a group of people, but now Bucky had to have them give him a grammar lesson? He knew he was old but it’s not like he forgot everything he learned way back when.

It must’ve read on his face.

“Trust me, Buck. Things are different now, people are different now. I don’t want you to accidentally hurt anyone just because you don’t know what’s going on.”

***

Bucky heard everyone in the tower refer to (Y/N) as if they were more than one person. Bucky wondered if there was some joke that he just wasn’t let in on.

“Hey, (Y/N),” Bucky smiled at (Y/N).

It wasn’t often that Bucky and (Y/N) really got to interact, they were both very busy.

(Y/N) spent most of their time studying and working from their room. Bucky liked to spend most of his time not being around people for as long as he could. So to see (Y/N) in the kitchen made him very excited.

“Morning, Buck! How have you been doing?”

“I’ve been good. Really good. I’ve been going to therapy.”

Why in the world would he share that with someone he’s interacted with once?

“I’m so good to hear that, Buck! I’m really proud of you.”

It sounded so earnest Bucky almost didn’t know what to do with himself. It wasn’t often people actually cared about what Bucky had to say. Nonetheless, someone he barely knew.

“I um..thank you.”

The pair shared a smile and (Y/N) went back to their tablet.

“Oh,” Bucky started. “Steve told me I needed to ask you about your…nouns.”

(Y/N) laughed a bit but still smiled at Bucky anyway.

“My pronouns,” (Y/N) gestured for Bucky to take a seat. “My pronouns are different than something you might be used to.”

“What do you mean.” Bucky took a seat.

“Well,” (Y/N) took a big sigh. “You know there’s she and he.”

(Y/N) paused and Bucky assumed he was meant to nod. He did.

“I’m not him or her. Gender is much more flexible now than it was when you were growing up. I use ‘they/them ‘ pronouns because I’m non-binary. Not all non-binary people use ‘they/them’, some use other pronouns and some people use Neo-pronouns.”

Bucky was trying to understand. He truly was. He was always much more accepting than anyone he ever knew back in the ’40s. It wasn’t that he thought there was something wrong with it, it was just that he didn’t understand. How couldn’t you be a boy or a girl?

“I…don’t get it,” he said with a small smile. “Were you born that way?”


(Y/N) gave Bucky a thoughtful look.

Great. He’s done something wrong.

“Gender-wise? Yes, I was born this way. I’ve been non-binary as long as I’ve been alive. Not everyone is like that. Some people discover that they’re non-binary later in their life.”

That didn’t clarify anything.

“I should preface that your gender and your biological sex are two different things.”

Oh.

Oh oh oh.

So they weren’t talking about- oh.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” (Y/N) laughed. “My gender identity is different than the sex I was assigned at birth. But- even today, you CAN change your sex to fit who you really are.”

Bucky knew a little bit about someone being transgender, it was in the crash course Steve gave him when he really started adjusting to new life in modern times.

“Right. But your gender and sex aren’t the same things.”

“Well…,” (Y/N) heaved a sigh. “Sometimes it is, some people do let their gender and sex define each other. It really depends. That’s why it’s always best to ask someone what their pronouns are before perceiving them in any way.”

It made a little bit of sense.

“So you’re not a she or a he, you’re they,” Bucky said.

“Yes. So you know…gender-neutral. I just don’t feel comfortable being perceived as a man or as a woman, I’d rather be perceived as neither.”

“Got it. So that’s why everyone refers to you as they,” Bucky nodded.

It wasn’t a hard concept to grasp that “they” could be used in a singular term.

“Thank you for telling me,” Bucky smiled. “Sorry if I slip up and call you something else, I’ll do my best.”

“Well, thank you for listening,” (Y/N) smiled. “I look forward to working with you.”

***

Working with (Y/N) turned into hanging out with (Y/N) every minute of every day. They were so easy to be around. Hanging out with (Y/N) turned into sleepovers with (Y/N), which quickly turned into a very confusing ordeal.

They had shared a bed with Bucky before, but never when the weather had been so ungodly hot. 

Tony messed up something in the wiring and now the ac wasn’t working.

“Bucky,” (Y/N) whined, drawing out the y. “Let me use your arm it’s too hot.”

“(N/N), you’ve been hugging on my arm all day, it’s not cold anymore,” Bucky laughed. “Give it some time cool off.”

(Y/N) huffed and flopped down onto the bed.

“You’ve forced my hand, Barnes, I have to remove my clothes.”

Bucky felt his face heat up. A lot.

“You’ve caught me in m master plan,” Bucky threw his hand over his face. “I really just want to see you naked.”

“Psh- men.”

There was a moment of silence.

“Do you mind if I take off my clothes?”


Bucky gulped. “Do you? Mind? Not mine. Yours. Do you mind. Like- if I see. Would you mind? I don’t mind. I really don’t. But I don’t want to make you uncomfortable if you do mind-“

“Bucky. I don’t mind,” (Y/N) smiled. “I’ll just take off my shirt.”

Taking off their shirt, (Y/N) exposed a nude-colored strap wrapped around their body.

“Are you hurt?” Bucky exclaimed.

The piece of clothing looked very similar to the skin-color wrappings Helen would give the team when they were hurt. It’s the only time Bucky had seen anything else like it.

“No…?” (Y/N) gave Bucky a weird look. “Oh, oh no. This is my binder.”

“Binder?”

“It’s…part of being the whole non-binary thing. I’m…I really hate the way my chest looks, but I don’t really want to get surgery on it, so I wear something super tight to make my chest seem flatter than it is.”

Bucky was starting to understand that it was anything related to gender that (Y/N) didn’t like. He never thought about its physical attributes.

“Oh, okay. That makes sense. Sorry if I drew attention to it.”

“It’s fine, Buck,” (Y/N) smiled. “I should’ve warned you, I can see what it looks like to you.”


Bucky was grateful (Y/N) was so patient with him while he was learning more about people being non-binary. He truly wanted to understand everything about them before he made a move on them. Though, every time he thought he knew everything, (Y/N) has to teach him something new.

“Hey, Buck? Everything okay?” (Y/N) moved closer to Bucky. “I lost you there.”

“I just…feel so bad that you have to teach me so much,” Bucky plopped down on the bed. “It’s not your responsibility to have to teach me everything.”

(Y/N) gave him a soft smile and brushed his hair out of his face.

“I wouldn’t teach you if I thought you didn’t care. I can tell you care, that’s why I teach you so much.”

They can tell that he cares?

“You can tell?”

(Y/N) gave him the softest look he’s ever seen. “Buck, you’re easier to read than you think. I’ve been waiting on you.”

“I wanted to know everything before I made a move-“

“Why would you put that pressure on yourself, Buck?” (Y/N) sighed. “You’re never going to know everything about everything there is to know, neither will I!”

“But it’s your thing! It’s your identity!”

“And it’s always changing and there are always new things to learn. I appreciate the thought, Buck, it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. But you can’t put that weight on your shoulders.”

As if (Y/N) couldn’t get any more perfect.

“So…,” Bucky trailed off.

“So…make a move you goofus,” (Y/N) smiled.

And maybe he did.

[oops-prow-did-it-again]

lol Im sorry I know I’ve been kinda reblogging a lot of discourse-y stuff lately, but idk, there’s something on my mind lately, and I’d appreciate some other people getting to see my thoughts. Today, my mind settled on, “How can t*rfs, r*dfems, or other people aligning with them believe that me or my partner are abusive - or being abused - without ever hearing what either of us have to say?”

I’ve just had a lot of Thoughts on t*rf nonsense and rhetoric ever since realizing I was trans (and most likely gay), me realizing I’m actually pan and that I only felt discomfort with anything other than ‘gay’ bc of fear of being misgendered and dysphoria, then my girlfriend realizing she was trans...

I see a lot of t*rfs acting like trans people are gonna force cis people (women, ofc, bc they couldn’t give a shit less what happens to men) to have sex with them and like...

i just wanna talk about what happened with me and my partner. I realized I was trans, I told my partner (she went by he/him pronouns at the time). She was shocked and, as she was undergoing a lot of stress at the time and the relationship was long distance, she was uncertain. She took some time to process it and ultimately said she would accept me, though she seemed apprehensive of me undergoing medical transitioning in the future. This kind of hurt, but I assumed she needed time - only to realize later she fundamentally misunderstood how things worked. We fought. We fought, because she had seemed onboard until she learned that other things might happen, aside from me getting a bigger clit and a somewhat more masc appearance.

But you know what?

We talked about it....

Shocker, huh?

We talked. We had an objective conversation, after emotions had calmed, about whether we still wanted this relationship. We did. So we talked more. She came to understand that being trans didn’t make me suddenly a new person, I was still me, and just wanted to experiment with gender presentation. SHE decided that SHE WANTED to continue the relationship with me, after I asked her objectively, if she did not want it to continue.

And you know what?

She realized that maybe her appreciation for feminine features, her envy for many women, may not be simple attraction. As I talked more about my dysphoric experience, she realized it sounded painfully familiar.

And when she was having these thoughts, we talked.

It started with her testing occasional feminine pronouns (the bigender label), before fully realizing she was binary transfem.

It.... it honestly saddens me, do... do people not think they can talk to their partners? If you feel you can’t talk to your partner about stuff like this... Then I’m sorry, but you might need to try working at trusting one another more, at being open to harder discussions.

Me and my girlfriend may have fought, but we never, EVER resulted to physical blows, name-calling, or anything else. We had some heated discussion over the topic at hand - more like a passionate debate than anything - but nobody was ever directly insulted. These harsher discussions lasted two days, with discussions after - while occasionally tense - never rising to anger again.

We love one another. I love her. I love her for HER... I certainly appreciate her body, but god, that’s not why I started hanging out with her? I don’t ever get to know someone specifically because they’re ‘hot.’ I thought she was funny. I thought she was captivating. I thought she was introspective, engaging, and fun. I still think she’s all of those things and so much more. She’s beautiful, in the way her personality melds with the comfortable, soft familiarity of her body, but I’m not there for just her body.

Changing how she looks will not make me love her less, it never has, and it never will. We had candid discussions, and realized she felt the same about me.

It.. it hurts so much to think there are people that think I am abusing her, or worse, that she’s abusing me, when they don’t know either of us - or our story - from Adam. It also makes me so angry that people would rather project their own insecurities and faulty looks on relationships onto perfect strangers, with such patronizing ideology, since they believe they just know so much better...

How can you know what’s better for us when you won’t even listen to us?

[91percentpynch]

jean moreau x pride months

happy pride month kids, here‘s some wholesome jerejean content for your soul!! does this make any sense? no. is it a mess? yes. hope you enjoy this!!

the first pride month

it‘s the beginning of june and jeremy starts acting weird

he smiles more, the real smile normally reserved for winning an exy game or when he‘s alone with jean

he started drawing flags on his face or on his eye lids, jeremy never wore make-up, not more than his usual eyeliner and nail polish

„what does that mean?“, jean asks, pointing at the flags on his cheeks.

„the pink, yellow, blue one means i‘m pan. you know, i like more than one gender, i told you that already. and the grey, purple, white and black one that looks like an arrow? that means i‘m demisexual, you know how i only feel sexual attraction to people i have a bond with? that‘s demisexual. those are pride flags, it‘s pride month. didn‘t you know that?“

of course jean didn‘t know, after all he was locked up in a bassement for 10 years and he didn‘t exactly talk the first time he came over here last year at the end of june.

„what‘s pride month?“, jean asked softly, knowing that jeremy would never judge him, never think he was stupid.

„it‘s a month for lgbtqa+ folks. that stands for lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgender, questioning, asexuals, aromantics and everything inbetween. we celebrate ourselves this month, show how proud we are of ourselves and our community. we celebrate marsh johnson, the black transgender, gay sex worker who started the riots, stonewell, and basically threw a brick at a police officer and started the fight for gay rights“

„how do you know you‘re not straight?“, jean asked quietly. thinking about the way his mind keeps wandering back to jeremy, keeps wandering back to the thought of kissing him, holding his hand, the feeling of his soft, badly dyed ginger hair between his fingers.

„well i always payed more attention to the personality, than the gender. i never really cared what‘s between the legs. and it took me quite a while to figure out that i only feel sexual attraction to people when i have a connection to them“

„have you ever kissed a guy?“, jean asked, curiously now. in the nest it was forbidden, but kevin wanted to try it once, in the dark of the night, the saftey of their room. jean couldn‘t tell if he enjoyed it or not, he never really felt any kind of attraction really. only bone deep fear. burning anger. and whatever the fuck his heart was doing when kevin held him close.

„yeah, i had a boyfriend throughout highschool, sophmore year until the end of summer of our senior year. and then freshman year of college i had this girlfriend who was really controlling and yeah. that‘s it. have you?“, his voice was soft, it reminded jean of the sunlight forming some kind of halo behind jeremy.

„kevin wanted to try it once. riko caught us. that‘s how it began“, jean replied, a shadow crossing over both his and jeremy‘s face. in a moment of weakness, at the beginning, jean told jeremy what they did to him in the nest, after jeremy accidentally touched him from behind.

„do you want to try it again?“, jeremy asked, a small smile on his lips. „with me, that is“, he added, barely audible.

„okay“, jean replied, leaning in.

jean was a couple inches taller than jeremy, and jeremy had to stand on his tiptoes to close the last few inches between them.

it was a soft kiss, a different than the stolen ones from kevin. better. these tasted like sunlight, like warmth, like home.

jean kissed jeremy back. carefully, softly, being scared he would break him, destroy him with his darkness.

„how was it?“, jeremy smiled at him after they were done, exchanging kisses, not stealing them. they were equals, no one would hurt him for wanting this

„i think i‘m only attracted to you“, jean admitted quietly. „but like not sexually. i don‘t like sex. never did. i never thought anyone was sexually attractive, i never wanted this and i still don‘t. i‘m sorry“

„you don‘t have to apologize, jean. that‘s being called asexual, the lack of sexual attraciton that is. and the not wanting sex part? sex repulsed. very valid. i will never be like them, i will never force you to do anyhting you‘re not comfortable with“

„and what if you miss having sex and want it and i can‘t give it to you?“, jean asked, tears burning behind his eyes. „i‘m not worth of your light, your warmth, your love as it is. i‘m broken, i‘m dark, i‘m everything you don‘t deserve. you deserve someone who is fixed and happy and can give you the entire world and go places without a panic attack and and and“

„ssh, jean. it‘s alright. it‘s alright. i want you. no one but you. i really, really like you and i am glad you like me to. you‘re not broken, you‘re not dark. you are wonderful. and no one is fixed, we‘re all a little broken in our own ways. i struggled with an eating disorder. i have adhd. sometimes i feel a little sad without any reason and can‘t get out of bed. sometimes i can‘t sleep and other days i could sleep for days. i don‘t need the entire world, i just need you“

it was this june, about a year after jean arrived in california, that he not only found a person who saw more in him than his scars, but a person who loved him not despite of them but for them

the second pride month

it‘s been a year since jean and jeremy kissed for the first time. a year full of highs and lows, fights and making up, miscommunication and cuddles, sweet kisses and ones tasting of tears. but it was also the year jean figured out that he might not be a boy after all.

„do you ever feel like you‘re not a entirely a boy?“, jean asked softly, threading his fingers through jeremy‘s soft blonde hair.

„dude, i‘m genderfluid, remember? alvarez bursted in our room and threw these in our face so people could refer to me with the right pronouns“

„that‘s why you changed your middle name to sol isn‘t it? because you like the sun and you like your hispanic heritage and it‘s a female name?“

„exactamente mi corazón“

„what are you today?“, jean asked softly, as he did every day.

„they/them, i don‘t feel like a guy or a girl today. just vibing“

„i- i think i‘m not entirely a boy either. like i know i was born as a boy and i‘m okay with that. but i feel like there‘s more to that. i can‘t put it in words but i think i want to try to go by he/ they. what do you call those people who don‘t quite find in the binary? i think i‘m that“

„that‘s nonbinary darling. i‘m proud of you. you‘re doing great“

jean didn‘t know how to repeat to that so he just decided to pull jeremy closer to him.

this pride month jean found a little part of himself, another puzzle piece to the mystery that his own person and it felt like a tiny little step towards a future he never dreamt he would have.

it was also the month he started wearing nail polish, because he loved the look on jeremy‘s face when they did them. occasionally he will wear some eyeliner.

the third pride month

another year passed, this year jean got himself a support dog. to help with the anxiety attacks. to help him heal.

it‘s a dalmatiner, called luna. she was trained to feel when he is uncomfortable and come closer to him, licking his hands, being close, being there

it is also the month he wanted to join jeremy for pride

„what are you today?“

„a girl i think. jeremy or sol are both fine“

„will you draw the flags on my face?“, he asked on the day of the parade.

„are you sure you want to go honey?“, sol asked softy, while she went to the bathroom to get her things.

„would i have asked if it wasn‘t moi amour?“, jean replied. „wait hold on, don‘t answer that“, he laughed looking at jeremy‘s face.

„but i‘m sure. first of all it makes you happy. second of all you missed it the last two years. third of all it will piss kevin off and i love that almost as much as i love. and lastly i have luna, she makes sure i‘m fine and i can always leave when i feel uncomfortable“

„okay, babe. what do you want me to do?“

„i want my flags on my face and maybe you can do my nails“, jean replied, smiling at jeremy as he did ever so often. „cover the tatoo, will you?“, he asked softly, touching the cursed three, counting the days for his cover up appointment in july.

„it‘s soon gone honey. it‘s gonna be alright“, jeremy whispered, feeling the tension in jean‘s shoulders.

„which color do you want your nails? mine are pastel rainbow look! alvarez got me those for my birthday last month! do you want matching nails?“

„whatever you want darling, you can choose“

„neat!“

this year jeremy‘s hair were a soft pink. it was 2 am when he bursted into the room whisper shouting „jean i‘m gay i must do something drastic to my hair. help me?“ and who was jean to question his beautiful date mate.

so jeremy took jean‘s face carefully in his hands, starting to draw jean‘s pride flags (demiromantic, asexual, nonbinary) on his face, hiding his tattoo underneath the black/ white/grey/ purple stripes of the asexual pride flag.

„they have no power over you anymore mi corazón. and if anyone gives you shit i will come for them“, jeremy whisperes against jean‘s lips before softly kissing them. „and now give me your beautiful hands so i can do your nails. i‘m feeling a pastel rainbow“

for the parade jean is wearing one of the shirts jeremy got him. it‘s yellow with a rainbow on it. „so you have a little brightness in your life“, he would tell him when he go it for him. it was before they started dating. it was before jean was able to tell him „but you are the brightest thing in the world and somehow you chose me as your person“, paired with light blue ripped jeans and his yellow fans. they started wearing yellow when they came to california, cutting off black completely, replacing it with colors and brightness.

jeremy on the other hand wore rainbow dungarees with a white shirt and white doc martens. his hair was up in two space buns, little pride flags put into them.

„do you think they get the hint?“, she smiled with a blinding smile.

„you‘re so unbelieveably beautiful sol“, jean replied.

they got luna and went to the parade.

it was scary, yes. but it was also beautiful.

people approaching them, asking for selfies, talking to him.

at first he was a bit anxious, but sol took their hand and luna licked his feet and it was alright. no one was hurting him. no one would punish him. he was surrounded by pride and love and happiness.

at some point he asked a girl with rainbow hair, she reminded him of renee, if she could take a picture of him and jeremy. she said yes, took one of them smiling, one of them kissing, and one of them where jeremy just smiled at his person.

it was the pride month he came out via social media. it was the pride month kevin called at two am, telling him how happy he was for them. that he himself found a boy, fell for him, but is too much a coward to do something about it. it‘s the year where he gets a lot of love, many fans telling him how proud they are of him and at least the same amount of hate. but it was alright. they had jeremy and that was all that truly mattered.

now

year after year they returned to the pride parade, with flags on their faces, or around their shoulders

sometimes neil and andrew or aaron and kevin would join them, sometimes they would go with laila and alvarez and sometimes jean and jeremy would go on their own

after college jean quit exy, jeremy went pro and gave his money to moriyamas, while jean opened his own tattoo studio, wrote songs, wrote crappy poetry and slightly better novels, tried himself as a part time model and fashion designer

they found happiness and home in each other and celebrated their love not only in pride but also every single day of the year

jean and jeremy got more dogs, an apartment of their own with big windows so they could watch the sunrise and sunset together

they have their ups and downs, like every other couple, but that doesn‘t matter. never did. what truly matters is that they keep finding back to each other. that they keep ending up in the same bed, in each others arms.

jean moreau never believed in love, never believed in soulmates and yet he found their soulmate, found the love of his life. and they are happy they stayed, kept fighting, to find this. to make a difference to the world. to be finally free. to be alive, living instead of only existing.

„jean?“, jermey says, fidgeting with his fingers.

„what is it moi soleil?“, jean relies getting lost in these ocean blue eyes.

„do you remember what happened five years ago?“, jeremy asks, his eyes looking anywhere but jean.

„we kissed for the first time?“, jean answers, panic slowly crawling through his veins.

„exactly so i thought we could celebrate this at the beach. you know, where our first date was?“, jeremy says nervously.

„honey are you alrighgt?“, jean is getting more and more worried, jeremy has never been that nervous.

„sure, come on mi corazón“

so jean slowly gets up and carefully puts on his shoes. something is weird here, something is wrong

jeremy seems off the entire ride to the beach they had their first date at.

when they arrive jean takes jeremy‘s hand, noticing that they are shaking ever so slightly. it is something like a nervous tick of them.

jean and jeremy arrive at the beach in time to watch the sun setting, making place for her lover the moon.

jean looks over to jeremy, when they suddenly get up and start pacing.

„jer, you‘re scaring me. please tell me what‘s going on up there“, jean says touching his head lightly.

„okay. i can do this“, jeremy mumbles as he gets down on his knee. „jean moreau, you are the love of my life. the light of my existence. ever since i saw you for the first time i knew i liked you, more than i was supposed to. i never dared to hope you would ever like me, or love me for that matter, but somehow you did. somehow you didn‘t turn away when i told you i‘m demi or pan or genderfluid. you stayed. you supported me. you love me. and i want to spend the rest of my life with you, so do me the favour and in the name of god, should they exist, do me the favour and marry me“

jean feels tears running his cheeks. „of course i will marry you, you loser“, he laughs, as he pulls jeremy down to him and connects their lips together. and it feels like their first kiss. it always does. and they would do that for the rest of their lives.

[a-pretty-nerd]

Devon Characters × Trans Masc Reader

Request: "hii, i wanted to ask you, a Devon (any character) x interssex enby (he/they pronouns) like... you only do cis males and cis females idk it'd be fun if you did a trans man, trans woman or an enby. could u do that for the Ts??? (trans)" ~ Anon

A/N: I love this request. I'm kinda out of my Devon obsession phase, but I'll always think he's amazing. But I really love this request and I'm always happy to write more inclusive stuff! So don't be afraid to ask, I just don't write for Rodrick Heffley anymore really. It just makes me a little uncomfy.

Warnings: NSFW content.

Rodrick:

SFW

Pure of Heart, Dumb of Ass

Has a vague idea of what it means he to trans.

Completely lost at the non-binary part.

You're gonna have to explain a lot to him, unfortunately.

But he's very willing to learn.

He will forget you use both he/they pronouns and probably end up sticking to he/him most of the time.

Says things like, "this is my boyfriend."

Unless you correct him in which case he gets SUPER embarrassed and apologizes profusely.

At first he's nervous to be with a trans masculine person.

It's like the nervousness of any new relationship (because he's a nervous wreck anyhoo) mixed with the newness of a new person.

He's very, VERY proud of you though.

He loves to bring you everywhere and just but like, "THIS IS MY PARTNER, AREN'T THEY AMAZING!?"

And everyone's like, "Yes, we know, we've met before."

He likes to share clothes. Correction, he likes it when you steal his clothes and he steals clothes from you.

It gives him butterflies in his tummy.

NSFW

He's a fumbling idiot anyways.

You're gonna have to guide him through what works for you.

But omg is he eager.

Like he's a horny bastard anyways, but like it's you we're talking about.

He's like, obsessed with you.

He'd be so embarrassed if you knew that, but it's true.

He has a hard on before you're even fully naked.

Sometimes he gets lost in his own pleasure so you kinda have to bring him back down to earth.

But usually he prioritizes you.

It makes him very happy to know how to make you squirm.

Jasper:

SFW

Gender isn't really a priority for Jasper.

He's also not too concerned with what's in your pants.

He's just happy to have a partner, honestly.

He's very emotionally dependent on you at times and that can lead to arguments or complications.

But he works very hard to be a good boyfriend for you.

He does tend to forget to introduce you as his partner sometimes so people just assume you're close friends at first.

But then they see you kiss and they're like, "Oooooh" and everyone moves on because it's the dystopia future and no one has time for homo/transphobia.

Jasper is very protective of you. Like if someone even looks at you funny he's about to throw hands.

You will have to drag him away from fights.

NSFW

I mean he's very new to sex in general so be patient. Especially if you're an afab individual.

Sometimes he can be hard on himself if he doesn't get it right away, but if your patient with him, he'll be too.

That wait is very worth it though.

Like damn.

Jasper LOVES oral.

It's like his favorite, receiving, giving, all of the above.

Adam:

SFW

I imagine that he's mostly dated feminine people, even had some experiences with other trans people but they were usually on the feminine side.

But he's also a horny bastard and is down for almost anything.

I feel like someone that isn't what he's used to would be really good for him.

Like it would force some much needed character growth on him.

At first when you start going out people also assume your his weird little friend.

Until they see you drunk make out.

Or they see the PDA.

Adam's a PDA guy.

To the point where you might have to tell him to fuck off.

His hand is ALWAYS in your back pocket.

NSFW

Hi? Hello. Horny B a s t a r d man.

Reporting for duty.

He can find anything to love about any body.

I think he's probably an ass guy.

He's really kinky but not in a polished, let's have hours of bandages play sex.

Like dirty sex. Like quickies in between classes shit.

Also he's a dirty talker.

You will have to tell him what to call you to make you feel good. But the moment he has that info-

Be ready dude.

Casper:

SFW

Nervous. Very Nervous.

What if he asks you the wrong questions?

What if he offends you?

What if he calls you the wrong thing on accident?! (He never does unless you had to come out to him)

What if he's a bad allie!?!?!

These are all if you take Casper as a cis dude.

Honestly I feel like he could also be trans lol

Honestly all of Devon's characters could be so easily.

ANYWAYS

He's precious.

He's always thinking about you and how awesome you are and he thinks you're really REALLY cool.

He tries to hide all the weird paranormal stuff from you at first thinking that you would think it was weird.

He's so relieved when you're not scared away by him.

He really loves and admires you like no other.

NSFW

Knows nothing about nothing.

Like he's seen porn and he masturbates but like he's never been with someone else.

You are gonna have to guide him through it.

He's always really worried he's hurting you for some reason.

Like you'll moan in pleasure and he thinks he's hurting you.

Lots of encouragement and reassurance.

Silver:

SFW:

I feel like Silvers definitely been with a trans person before. Especially Trans masculine people.

He's very PC, very hyper aware, very active.

You will be joining him for a lgbtq+ or BLM March.

You will also have to be the one to bring the sunscreen and water bottles and other necessities.

He brags about you a lot.

You're gonna have to beg him to take care of himself and baby him.

Like seriously he's really annoying like that.

He's a homemaker though.

Like he will redecorate your shared spaces with some expensive vegan handmade whatever it is.

He burns a lot of incense and candles and then uses those candle holders as bowls.

You'll be eating cereal and look down at the bowl and be like:

"Hey babe, where'd we get this bowl from?"

And Silver will looks over and say:

"Oh that was from my sandlewood and eucalyptus candle from (insert vegan cruelty free small owned business here)."

NSFW

Bottom.

He's a total bottom.

Prepare to top.

Will only top if he's under the influence and feeling particularly fun.

I don't know why, he just has that vibe to me.

He likes out door sex.

He likes scented lube.

He's also pretty affectionate but not like handsy.

Idk why but I feel like he also likes to be dominated?

I feel like it'd be really easy to make him cry.

[fairymadnessyeah]

BNHA Ship to Finish the Year

KuroMori (Komori Kinoko x Kuroiro Shihai)

Canon

Kuroiro developed a crush when he first saw Komori.

At first, he thought she was cute, but then she saw her decimate her opponents on an exercise and he was in love, No going back.

When the guys find out, they try to be his wingmen. But it's really hard.

Kuroiro is super shy, he can barely look at her in the eyes without falling apart. And Komori is the most oblivious person in the planet. One time, on their second year, somebody left her a teddy bear with a heart, and she took it to lost and found.

Kuroiro is so shy that the first times he tried to talk to her, he hid in the shadows of his clothes with his quirk.

Tetsutetsu, Kaibara and Tsuburaba are his main wingmen. They have been promised to be groomsmen at their wedding. They have a speech prepared. Whoever gets them together will be best man.

Ironically, none of them get them together. The one who is able to do so is Tokoyami.

He and Kuroiro are friends of darkness, and the bird can't see his friend suffer. He first talks with Komori, who says she never considered romance, but their conversation leaves her thinking. Then he asks the girls from his class to feign interest in Kuroiro. Not to flirt with him, but to show he is an available wanted suitor. Then he gives an inspiring speech, that only Kuroiro was able to understand, which gives the black hero courage to face the music.

It doesn't work, but in the end, Komori asks him out.

They go to see a movie and then to walk around the park. To this day, Komori thinks it was the most romantic outing she had.

They start dating after that.

Komori calls him 'Her Black Trumpet', it's a black mushroom.

To hang out on his room, she needs a forehead flashlight. The room is pitch black, and she can't see. 

I headcanon Komori to be an old-Disney fan bc of her hero costume. Like old animations in black and white with Minnie and Mickey Mouse.

That's why one Halloween they dressed as the two mouses.

Kuroiro is whipped. He knows and accepts this. If his girlfriend asked him to jump off a bridge, he would ask which one she had in mind.

In her birthday, he always surprises her with a new dress based on idol videos. She loves them. She can be seen wearing for a week after she gets it.

They stay together after graduation.

But being newly graduated heroes and dating is very hard. After a year of trying to make it work, they break up. Komori is the one who pulls the trigger, but Kuroiro agrees with her and says he saw it coming for a while.

They part in good terms. But their busy lives don't let them see each other.

They reunite when Monoma invites them to a class B reunion. He heard class A was doing one too and he can't let those pesky class A brats get away with that. Monoma, we are not even in the school anymore.

Everybody is kind of worried about their reaction, but the two don't make it awkward. And as drinks come and go, they end up making out on Kuroiro's home and falling asleep on the couch.

The next morning they talk and agree to try again, but to start slow.

Three years later, they get married. 

Family

Komori's parent are rich. I mean have you seen the dresses she wears on the Shifuku. That has to be expensive.

I feel like they would love Kuroiro. He would try to go the extra mile to impress them and how he is super attentive to their daughter.

Kuroiro's parents work in a theatre. That's were his drama came from.

He used to practice his quirk under the theatre.

Komori and Kuroiro have two kids.

The eldest one is called Kuroiro Tengu. Tengutake means Amarita, (that is a type of mushroom)

They have pitch-black straight hair, and crazy eyes like their parents, They are non-binary, pronouns they/them.

Unlike their sibling, Tengu doesn't want to be a pro-hero. They were born after the hospital raid and the golden age of villains, a lot of young people don't see the appeal of being heroes or having them.

Their quirk is called Black Bending. They can shape and form anything black, Tengu uses it to paint.

They are also stuck in their goth phase like their father.

The other kid, who is four years younger than Tengu, is called Toryu. Toryufu means truffle, another type of mushroom.

He is a copy of his mother except for the black skin.

His quirks is the same as his mother's, but he can also change the colour of the fungus he grows. 

Komori and Kuroiro are both heroes, but they both have different schedules. Kuroiro works at night and takes care of the kids during the day, and Komori works during the day and takes care of the kids at night. They spend the mornings together.

AU - Fantasy AU

Komori is a druid that lives reclused in the forest.

One day, she finds this man on her forest with obsidian skin and silver hair. He is wounded and hurt. She takes him to her shack and heals him.

When Kuro wakes up, he finds an angel taking care of him.

He is a warlock who barely got away from his abusive master. The last thing he remembers is blacking out in the forest.

The two spend a lot of time together as he heals and slowly get closer.

Komori has no problem with him staying with her for as long as he wants, but one day, another warlock, AFO, takes control of her forest and infest it with monsters.

The two ran for safety, and Kuro swears that he will help her get back her home.

They hear about this group of young warriors who are searching for a way to stop AFO and journey to meet them and join them.

Komori, who has lived almost all of her life on the forest, is very curious about this new world she finds herself in. Kuroiro shows her everything and tries to explain everything the best he can.

They do find the group they were searching for. Their leader, a man, called Midoriya, doesn't give them the best of news.

He tells them that they are trying to stop AFO, but they can't stop to help one small forest. He luckily does know some people that might.

Some friends of them had made a group of warrior who tried to weaken AFO forces that attacked the people of the kingdom. They are lead by a witch called Kendo and a dragon companion called TetsuTetsu.

The two set off again to find them and cross paths with a lot of different people, another druid with vines for hair, a centaur, a bard, a blacksmith, etc. They all have a thing in common. They are all looking for Kendo and her group.

They end up finding her and explain the situation, the group helps them.

But, when the forest is cleared, and the group of warrior has to leave, the idea of staying in the forest doesn't sound as appealing.

The forest is Komori's home. She lived here, learned here and had only recently left it for the first time. She knows her life got a lot of excitement these last couple of months, but she isn't sure if she is ready to leave everything behind.

Kuroiro has made plans to stick with the group and help the people with AFO. He makes promises to come visit whenever they are in the area.

The next morning, as they start packing to leave, Komori makes a decision. She says goodbye to her home and goes with them.

With this group, the two travel the land and go to places they've never seen before, sometimes even crossing paths with Midoriya and their group.

They also make a few enemies, especially with the mercenary group, the Vanguard Action and Detnerat.

Kuroiro and Komori don't acknowledge their feelings until the incident.

The incident happened in a remote town where magic users were going crazy. When the group arrived, it didn't take long for their magic users to start losing their minds.

The real problem was a man who was controlling them by poisoning the water. But Kuroiro was the hardest to stop. He is a warlock, and so he had been taught much older and much dangerous magic.

Komori is the one who snaps him out of the man's control. It's a very heart fell moment, and they have their first kiss.

Fanon Opinion

So, I can't think of NSFW for these too.

I don't know why. I just can't. So they are going to be the first to have the Fanon opinion.

And I know that Kuroiro appearentely likes taboo things. But I'm honestely afraid. I don't wanna google 'taboo sex stuff'. I feel like that is a hole you can't come out of.

The only thing I can think that might be okay with them is Vampire roleplay. Because that would fit. I can see it. Don't ask me who is the vampire, I haven't decided yet.

So... not many people ship them. Like compared to other ships, they have very little content. Then again, that will change when season 5 comes.

Hopefully.

The one thing I believe we can agree on is that Kuroiro is a blushing mess when he is near her.

There's also the rivalry with Tokoyami. Komori seems to be interested in Hawks, and the guy now works with him.

I have also seen a few pictures with her in gothic lolita dresses and let me tell you, girl looks good~

There is not much about them really. I wanted this day reserved for Komori because it's her birthday today.

There isn't much about them or many of the 1B class. That should change.

So, that's all I have for now!

[tundrainafrica]

girl you should see twitter because every shipper there is trying to force their own agenda enfjcjvkv i tried interacting with some levihans there and they were so AGRESSIVE. same with the eruri fans who say we’re all homophobic? no???? like i see hange as non-binary how is a nb ship homophobic and even if it’s a m/f relationship it’s just that they have good chemistry what does gender have to do with anything aaa

Tbh, I actually am on Twitter for Levihan content so I am aware of what you’re saying.. I tend to stay lowkey though because it’s a pretty personal twitter and a lot of my irl friends follow me there. I don’t join the convos but I’ve seen some of them. 

Gender has to do with everything for a lot of people. There are people who see everything gay as a relationship, people who see everything opposite sex as just a friendship. More common irl but there are people who see everything straight as a relationship but refuse to see everything same sex as a romantic relationship. 

I see no problem with people doing or writing anything they want or preferring one ship to the other. Like go write an mpreg eruri fic or a canon ereri fic. I definitely have issues though with people just pushing their agenda. Tastes on fanfiction and headcanons are personal preferences and the goodness of the community is pretty much rooted in the discourse and in the sharing of HCs. I don’t agree with some of the ones I’ve seen even among mutuals but I do have a lot of HCs now about Levihan because of whatever people post here. In a fandom, nobody is supposed to judge you about which HCs you consider true and which you don’t.  Fandom is a break from real life, work and school where we are constantly judged because of our skills and our ability to contribute to this world. This part of our life is supposed to be wholesome and it’s supposed to make us happy. That’s pretty much one reason why I try not to get into shipping wars or try not to join in on those and just respect other people’s opinions. One of the reasons why I avoid fights as much as possible. I enjoy doing analysis because I like the discourse but I try not to keep it heated and avoid any personal attacks. That’s also pretty much the reason why seeing personal attacks against Isayama and his writing doesn’t sit well with me.  

Personally, gender isn’t a big issue for me just like for you anon. 

I do not care if Hange is a woman, nonbinary etc etc etc. I love Levihan for the dynamic, just like you. I personally see her as a girl because I don’t want to delve into her biology but canon has shown me enough to at least make me want to write her as a woman. I also need pregnant and Momma Hange in my life. I don’t use “they” because I just find it confusing because I tend to have to reread lines and ponder whether they are talking about one person or two. I don’t go much into the gender discussion either/ because as mentioned before, I don’t think Hange and Levi given their current circumstances would ever consider something as progressive of a concept as gender.

In a modern AU, maybe? Would I write it? Probably not. I am not as adept with LGBTQ and gender issues as other people. 

Does that mean I’m homophobic?  I ship Yuri and VIctor, I ship Yuki and Kakeru from fruits basket too. I’m not necessarily homophobic. If anything, I am “Unhealthy relationship” phobic or I probably wouldn’t read a fic about a pairing which has enough grounds for me to think they would never develop naturally. I wouldn’t read fics that glorify rape or domestic abuse or where my favorite pairings are just being assholes to each other either. 

People can write whatever they want though but my own preference would be to highlight the types of relationships I would want to be in, hence Levi and Hange, Yuri and Victor, Roy and Riza, Yuki Kakeru etc. 

When I post stuff online, I generally have a goal. The goal generally when I write is to highlight the good parts about relationships, the beautiful parts about developments, make sense of certain emotions and facets of character’s personalities and see how they’d react in certain situations. As much as possible, I try to leave something for myself or other readers to think about after writing it and the messages I try to leave are generally wholesome. 

That counts as an agenda.

Would I consider it pushing my agenda? As said above, I wouldn’t argue about it. I’d give my opinions, lay out facts, give analysis and the readers and the audience can choose what to do with it. Would it be nice if they agreed? Yes it would. But we all have different backgrounds. We’ve experienced different types of traumas. We have different histories so I will never truly understand why other people feel the way they do or why they believe certain things and that��s why at this rate, I wouldn’t bother to try to push my agenda to anyone. (That is unless I see people’s agendas being a danger to other people but how I handle those is another story for another time.) I would try my best though to understand because that’s really the most we can give people. Besides, the facts, opinions and analyses people lay out will only make our own opinions towards certain things more nuanced and that’s why I love discourse.

Tumblr metas and writing is something I go into after a hard day’s work and I guess I just want to keep it as stressless as possible for myself. My general relationship with this hobby is good and I’m hoping to keep it this way. 

I hope the aggressiveness of other people in the community does not hurt you or destroy whatever love you may have for your ship or for the fandom. There are lots of people in my little Levihan tumblr bubble who agree with you and are pretty nice and open people. 

Feel free to just drop an ask anytime. I’m happy to just discuss sensitive topics like this without pushing agendas or giving out personal attacks. Even people I’m close to in real life have different perspectives and preference, even my best friend and my boyfriend are like that so I’m pretty much used to disagreeing with people. 

As long as we agree that we all want to strive to make this community a less toxic place, I think we could make whatever differences we have as a fandom work.

[unsettledink]

A while back I made up a list of fics I had ideas for/wanted to write, mostly to try and drum up bids for Marvel Trumps Hate.

Since then I have, of course, had approximately five million new ideas and keeping track of them has gotten a bit out of hand, so i thought I’d try and put them all in one place that I could come back to and also update more easily. Also possibly some sort of... accountability thing? Like if I put them out into the universe I’m more likely to actually write them? Well I can dream.

There’s going to be a couple of these, divided up by pairings. Feel free to ignore, it’s mostly housekeeping!

(This one’s just for starker and polystarker ideas.)

I’m kind of grouping these because it got long. (Smut, smut + feels, fluff, oh no the sads)

* for new ideas (ARG)

Just the smut! (Ok some feels):

Continuation of Hang Up – so what does happen the next morning after that phone call? (Sex. Probably more phone sex.)

*Pocket Change sequel – Why yes, Peter, you can work out some sort of retroactive deal to 'pay' for the suits...

Peter is dumb online – Peter decides to auction off his virginity online. Of course Tony finds out immediately. Of course Tony buys it to keep Peter from getting hurt. Of course Tony decides to meet up and teach Peter a lesson about being safe – wait. That might have been a mistake. (It’s not.)

Actually, Peter doesn’t like it rough – miscommunication piled on top of miscommunication because they’re both idiots who are desperate for each other, until a tipping point is reached. Happy ending! Fluffy ending!

Gag reflex training – pretty much what it sounds like. Tony having a lot of fun with Peter; messy, noisy, hopefully hot.

Experienced Peter – Peter hasn’t been waiting around for Tony to be the first, and he’s had time to figure out some of his preferences. Like topping almost exclusively, among other things. Hey I kind of wrote this!

Civil War pick me up – after the airport, Tony goes to check on Peter and is in desperate need of something nice. Peter really, really wants to be that something nice. Could be underage, could be not.

Continuation of Gift Wrapped – (Peter/Tony/Pepper) there’s a lot more sex happening for Tony’s birthday than I had time to write for kinktober.

But you want me to be safe, don’t you? - Peter’s hit with sex pollen, but it can be taken care of without outside help. Peter would still really like it if Tony would help. Or would at least keep an eye on him. Or at least stay in hearing range! He won’t be able to resist if Peter’s noisy and saying his name while he gets off, right???

Armor Kink - I mean, basically what it says on the tin. Peter’s been having fantasies about the armor forever. Tony is absolutely willing to help him with that.

ABO forced presentation – Peter doesn’t know what he’ll end up being, and that’s bad for Reasons. He convinces Tony try forcing a presentation (not noncon type forcing) and things get weird. Playing around with the idea of how non-binary might go in ABO. Possible Tony/Peter/Pepper endship. More than likely somewhat underage.

Avengers orgy – Peter’s finally old enough to join in the tradition! While he’s having fun with everyone, Peter and Tony keep gravitating to each other, winding up with things getting a little too emotional when Tony finally gets his chance. Potential for Tony/Peter/Rhodey endship.

The spider bite did what?!? - Peter starts having really weird cravings when he’s around Tony. Weird as in blood, and Tony is going to help him figure this out. Even when it turns into a craving for sex (and bloodplay). Even when it turns into terrifying (for Peter) egg/medical kink.

*Hooker D/S AU Brat!Peter – Tony orders 'the brattiest sub you have' and gets Peter. Who is incredibly so, and Tony is actually delighted by this. And Peter is a little taken aback that someone likes this rather than considering him a bad sub.

*Flaunt follow up – more Peter/Tony/Rhodey D/S AU? Yup!

*No, I'm saving YOU – villains of the week catch them and plan on gangbanging Peter – until Tony offers to be willing if they leave Peter alone. At some point Peter comes around and tries to bargain for them to use him instead of Tony. Tony is not happy about this, but boy, the villains are!

*Peter/Harley/Tony - Tony’s so glad Peter’s over that crush and happy with Harley. Really. Totally. Meanwhile, Peter & Harley are doing their best to get Tony into bed with them and growing increasingly frustrated with Tony’s (intentional) obliviousness.

*

Smut! Oh wait, where did all these feelings come from?:

Toybox – slightly darker Peter decides if Tony won’t fuck him, the least Tony can do is pay for Peter’s toys, and watch while Peter enjoys them. No touching allowed since Tony doesn’t want him, after all. Which is a rule that gets harder and harder to keep in place; feelings, so many feelings everywhere.

Pain kink Peter – what it says on the tin, lol. “Oh Mr. Stark, maybe you should supervise this slightly dangerous sex thing I like.” I think we can guess where it heads from there.

Baby's first D/S (dom version) – established T/P, Tony's subby but hasn't brought it up. Peter is like, 'but what if I was into the idea of doming?' and they start messing around with it. Peter is Very Earnest and learning all these new things, and Tony is surprised to find, after a while, Peter's doing pretty good on his own.

Call boy Peter – what it sounds like! It’s an accident that Tony gets him; good thing Peter was blindfolded! Bad thing that Peter’s senses are enhanced and he knows from the start who it is. Good thing that Peter’s not going to say anything so he can keep this reliable customer?

Evil Ex D/S verse – Peter’s pretty insecure about being a good sub for Tony and it’s not helped at all when one of Tony’s ex subs tells him he’ll never be able to take what Tony wants to dish out. Well, Peter’s going to prove him wrong! Tony really doesn’t understand why Peter is making himself miserable for something Tony doesn’t even want, and things almost break before they get fixed.

*Besties and Omegas and Peter's – Rhodey and Tony (both omegas) end up in an awkward situation when Peter has something like an enhanced rut around them. Slightly complicated dynamics but happy ending for everyone.

*Outraged owned Peter – some sort of slave type au where Obie buys Peter for Tony as a companion, considering Peter to be a distraction and possible spy. Tony does not want a sex slave and rejects him, and Peter is furious – he is not just for sex, he is literally worth his weight in gold, and how DARE Tony not want him!

*Very dark Peter - Peter’s decided he really likes having Tony completely wrapped around his little finger. To the point of getting Tony to give him/do things that are pretty far from acceptable, and then Peter figures out he likes showing off his hold over Tony even more. Oops.

*

Fluff! (Crap there’s not much):

Follow up to Seiche – mostly fluffy 5 times +1 where the emotion sensing bond causes (minor) problems

Fluffy D/S verse – all the fluff! All the outside POV! Everyone assumes that obviously Tony is a dom; after all, that’s how he’s always presented himself. Everyone is wroooooong. Tony’s never been happier.

Nail polish – little bit of Tony finding it incredibly appealing when Peter wears nail polish

*Lingerie shorts – several vignettes of them getting each other and wearing different interesting pieces of lingerie

*

Oh No + all the feelings, heavy on the bad ones:

Soulmark AU – Tony finds out first and isn’t going to do anything due to the age difference. Peter finds out and thinks that’s bullshit + horribly hurt that he’s being rejected. Things are forced when Peter gets hit with a drug that messes with that bond and they both have to figure out how things are going to go. Possible bittersweet ending.

Screw soulmates, actually - Post CW and Tony dealing with soulmate rejection (that’s a WHOLE other fic). Peter’s become convinced Tony’s a blank like him, and then doesn’t understand why Tony’s soulmate wouldn’t want him. Peter does! They get their happy ever after without being fated for each other, and Peter gets a chance to tells Tony’s soulmate what a dick they are. All the satisfaction!

*Blanks are Bad – soulmark au where blanks are regarded extremely poorly, and Tony is exposed as one. Lots of dealing with the ugly fallout, and Peter coming to Tony and confessing he's a blank too and has been so scared.

Untenable – sequel to Indefensible and … horrible. The ABO underage incest continues, Tony hates himself, Peter is distressingly happy. Mpreg makes everything ten times worse; endgame makes everything 100 times worse. Going beyond that would be spoilery, but uh. Everything becomes 1000 times worse by the end! Yay! Yikes.

*Made For It follow ups (aka the... happy version of Indefensible??) - we want to actually see the sex scene they talk about doing, right? Right. And possibly some mpreg? We shall see.

ABO accidental bonding – the worst abo version, heads up. Underage Peter, omegas are treated very poorly, Peter and Tony don’t know each other beforehand and don’t do great getting to know each other afterwards. Biology continues to fuck Peter over, and Tony really doesn’t get how desperately Peter wants Tony to like him. Mountains and mountains of angst and sad before the happy ending.

Copy - After IW, Tony makes a Peter clone/android/whatever. Unfortunately, it just makes things worse because it’s just enough off to make it super obvious it’s not Peter. And fake!Peter knows it too. He’s just enough like real Peter to fall in love with Tony too, and he can’t figure out how to make Tony care about him instead of real, dead Peter. Not that it matters when he snap is reversed (Tony lives) and fake!Peter isn’t needed or wanted anymore. (Will probably have a sequel where real Peter finds out about all this, probably happy ending for everyone.)

Nothing sticks around - years after the blip, Peter discovers Tony, alive - only Tony has none of his memories. Tony doesn’t want anything to do with these people Peter tries to reintroduce him to; he trusts Peter and wants to stay with him. And does, for quite some time, things turning into a relationship, and even if Peter feels guilty about it, he’s happy. Right up until Tony suddenly remembers everything … except what’s been going on the last few years with Peter. Undecided if there’s a happy ending or not.

I hate time travel - once Tony figures out time travel, he decides he needs to find out if this works by hopping forward and seeing if Peter is back. And then maybe he should hop forward a little more just to check on him. Keeps doing this, about once a year, and while Peter is so glad to see him, it’s destroying Peter to basically go through Tony ‘dying’ over and over. Pretty soon it’s fucking up Tony too, after he accidentally shows up when Peter’s in the middle of sex. Very bittersweet ending to maintain the timeline.

Fuck you, Beck - Beck goes about getting the glasses in the worst ways, and Peter finds out a little too late - way too late when it comes to sleeping with him. Not that he’s going to ever tell anyone about that. Not even Tony, when Tony comes back. Not even Tony, when it turns out Tony is interested. Okay, maybe he’ll have to tell Tony when Peter’s reactions to sex become a problem. Happy ending but lots of ouch on the way.

Sequel to Dormant - so what exactly does Tony notice the morning after? And what exactly does Peter do about it? (Spoiler: A lot more than Peter thought he would, and nothing good.)

Don’t punish people like that – as much Tony/Obie as Tony/Peter, maybe pre-Tony/Peter. Obie decided to deal with Tony’s wild streak by punishing him in an especially awful, painful, dehumanizing, sexual way. Tony’s managed to handle how awful that was by pretending it was helpful (nope!). When Peter will not stop misbehaving, the last resort Tony can think of is what was done to him. It helped, right? (He can’t bring himself to in the end, which sets off a cascading failure of repressed trauma, woot!)

*That's rape, Tony – Tony getting drugged, gangbanged, and recorded, and then having part of it released that looks consensual. Tony doesn't remember enough to say it wasn't, and with his history, people don't question it. It goes over very poorly and he's handling all the parts of it very poorly, and Peter is the one to finally put the pieces together.

Sex Pollen Non-Con – Tony’s hit with some sort of fuck or die stuff; only problem is that he 100% refuses to let Peter do anything, and there’s no one else. Peter, convinced that Tony’s going to die, stops giving Tony a choice. What’s that, the trauma Tony was hoping to spare him is replaced with way worse trauma from basically raping Tony? WHOOPS. (Probably happy ending!)

Secondhand verse – following after this, things growing steadily worse, hotter, and more complex between Peter, Beck, and Tony. Bad decisions all around! Unexpected feelings all around! General unhappiness at having feelings that can be hurt all around! Probably a series of fics.

12:00 - follow up to 11:59, Tony and Peter finally getting it on and Beck being an ass in the background. Also the prequel that’s primarily Peter/Quentin, and possibly a sequel where Tony decides that maybe it wasn’t the worst thing in the world, watching Beck fuck Peter - and Peter liked it, right? Everyone’s down for a totally uncomplicated round two, right? Or three, or four...

(And feel free to talk to me about anything here, I love an excuse to ramble. Also, if something grabs your attention, have fun writing it - the more the merrier!)

[hellomynameisbisexual]

5 Ways That Bi Erasure Hurts More Than Just Bisexual People

December 2, 2014 by Milo Todd

This year, Bisexual Awareness Day/Celebrate Bisexuality Day was on September 23rd.

That same day, the National LGBTQ Task Force thought it’d be a good idea to post an article entitled “Bye Bye Bi, Hello Queer,” in which leadership programs director Evangeline Weiss said “she is ready ‘to say bye bye to the word bisexuality.’

She said it does not describe her sexual orientation, and she encouraged readers to cease using the word as well as she felt it reinforced a binary concept of gender.

Let me drive that home a little more. The National LGBTQ Task Force not only thought it would be a good idea to publish an article insulting, misrepresenting, and forsaking the bisexual letter in their own name, but did so on Celebrate Bisexuality Day.

Rude.

And a fantastic example of the constant, ongoing erasure bisexual people have to deal with. This one just happened to be incredibly blatant.

What happened as a result of that article? People got pissed.

People got so pissed that the Task Force not only removed the article from their website, but posted in its place this non-apology (it keeps being referred to as an apology, but I’m not so easily pleased): “Having listened to a wide array of feedback on the timing and content, we recognize that this blog offended people. For this we sincerely apologize. It has been removed.”

In other words, “Sorry you got pissed off. Hopefully you’ll shut up if we take it down.” Which, as far as I can tell, isn’t much of an apology for a blatant disregard of an entire community of people.

Misunderstanding of the bisexual community has been the crux of biphobia’s history and the ongoing battle to erase bisexuality from the LGBTQIA+ community.

It’s a scary time to be bi, especially when your lesbian, gay, pansexual, and queer siblings and allies are calling for your blood simply because they’ve fallen victim to the mainstream agenda without realizing it. (Say what?! Jump to #5.)

It’s time for a change.

It’s time for all of us to properly understand one another and to — hope of hopes — become allies for our incredibly similar endeavors. To help initiate that friendship, I ask you, dear reader, to go through the following three steps.

Step 1: Look below. If I’ve played my cards right, virtually every reader should find at least one category with which they identify.

Step 2: Approach your designated section(s) with an open mind, an unprejudiced heart, and a desire to further enhance your own community/ies. It’s difficult for people to learn new things and see different views if they automatically approach them with resistance, which is often the case with bisexual topics.

Step 3: See how bi erasure hurts you as a person and, while you’re at it, likely hurts the people you care about. Because it really is happening.

So here are five ways in which bi erasure is hurting people of layered identities.

1. Female-Identified People and Feminists

Bisexuality is one of the only non-monosexual* identities currently recognized in the English-speaking world. If bisexuality is kept underground, it suppresses our limited, precious resources for open discussion about non-monosexuality. This hurts female-identified people and feminists regardless of their sexual orientation.

To this day, female-identified people can’t get a fair shake. Pay is unequal, birth control access is limited, and objectification is a daily thing. Non-monosexual women in particular are often not taken seriously because they’re seen as sluts, greedy, or unable to make up their minds.

Also, the general fetishizing of women is particularly intensified in the bisexual realm by (straight-identified) men, turning the very act of women’s sexual freedom, empowerment, and self-expression into nothing more than something for male gazes. (This is most often seen through the relentless prompts for female-female-male threesomes and masculine catcalls in bars when two femme-appearing women make out.)

By participating in or casually allowing bi erasure to happen, we’re ignoring the specific plights and abuses of bisexual women, thereby contributing to the ongoing problem of female inequality, objectification, and silence.

As feminists, we can’t pick and choose which women to fight for. The complexities of womanhood — and all of its cultural suppressions — are an all-or-none deal.

*Note: Non-monosexuality usually refers to someone who is interested in more than one sex or gender. (In other words, somebody who isn’t gay, lesbian, or straight.) Another way to say “non-monosexuality” would be “polysexuality” to help keep it from sounding negative.

2. Male-Identified People and Male Liberationists*

Just like with female-identified people and feminists, bi erasure hurts male-identified people and male liberationists regardless of their sexual orientation.

Allow me to make this pretty basic: Men continue to be fed the message that being gay is bad. Being gay means you’re not really a man, which means you lose your dude membership and the bulk of your male privilege. And since gayness equals the slightest shred of attraction to or intimacy with another male, all manners of bromance must be squashed.

In short, many guys live in a state of silent terror in this regard.

Bi men are afraid of being banished from the world of lady-loving, gay men are worried about losing all of their connections to hetero land, and nothing is worse for a straight man than being called a fag.

Constant monitoring, constant filtering, constant stress: Is this really the kind of world we guys want to keep living in?

By being able to talk about bisexuality — remember: one of our only non-monosexual identities — male-identified people can begin to break free from the masculine ideal.

Bi talk helps bridge the gap between being a man (straight) and not being a man (gay) and realizing, hey, having some manner of attraction to or intimate interaction with another guy is totally okay, masculinity unscathed.

Gay men can begin to regain their identities as men, bi men can finally start coming out, and “fag” will lose its strength as an insult from one straight man to another.

*Note: Male liberationists are more or less seen as allies to feminists and vice versa. Both will argue that patriarchy is bad, but while feminists talk of how it’s bad for females, male liberationists talk of how it’s bad for males. Examples include the inability to romantically or sexually love another male, the emasculation of men of color, and the physical, verbal, and mental abuse that comes from society’s expectations to be stereotypically masculine.

3. People Who Identify as Trans Sexual, Trans Gender, Genderfluid, Genderqueer, or Gender Non-Conforming

This one’s pretty easy. Some people on the trans spectrum identify as bisexual. But then they’re told they can’t or that it’s an insult to their trans siblings because bisexuality is believed to be trans-exclusive.

The problem with bi erasure is it adds to the ongoing problem of cis people — LGQ or not — telling trans people what to think. Cis people have a bad habit of thinking they need to speak for people on the trans spectrum even when trans people are quite capable of speaking for themselves. This is even more frustrating when it comes from a community supposedly meant to support them.

Despite the personhood for which they’re continuing to fight, trans people can receive backlash from the lesbian, gay, and queer communities as their identities and bodies are turned into political battlegrounds.

Sometimes, they’re used without consent by some cis individuals so that points can be made for non-trans-specific agendas, and sometimes they’re ironically used in the attempts for cis identities to help better the trans worlds.

For instance, automatically dismissing bisexuality as trans-exclusive and guilting any person on the trans spectrum that wants to identity as bisexual, if I may make so fine a point.

As blogger Aud Traher writes, “If you want to support trans people like me, don’t erase me or speak over me or cause me harm out of self-righteous biphobia. Look into yourself and deal with that internalized biphobia and then help others get over theirs. Don’t advocate for the destruction of a community in the name of ‘saving’ it. And, especially, don’t do it in my name.”

4. People Who Identify as Gay, Lesbian, or — Yes — Straight

Quite simply, it makes gays and lesbians (and straight people) look bad, too.

Bisexual people get a bad rap for apparently upholding the gender binary by saying they love only (cis) men or (cis) women, but isn’t that pretty much exactly what gays, lesbians, and straight people are saying when they identify as gay, lesbian, or straight? That they’ll only love either (cis) men or (cis) women?

But where’s their rampant backlash from the rest of the community for upholding the gender binary? I’m just sayin’.

Even when these groups extend their definitions to include trans people and people on the gender non-conforming spectrum, it’s often still as long as those trans people exhibit some manner of gender representation that falls into the lover’s category of desire.

Now, I’m honestly not trying to rag on gays, lesbians, or even straight people. They have as much right to identify how they want as anybody else. And there’s nothing wrong with feeling primarily attracted to only, say, cis or trans men if your brain simply tells you that you only like guys. That’s fine. Go ahead and do that. I’m not saying you can’t.

What I am saying is you can’t be spewing bi hate or letting bi erasure slide because 1) it’s incredibly one-sided and unfair, and 2) in the end, it’s making you look bad, too.

What do you think will happen if bi erasure is a success? You’ll be next, dears.

*cue Jaws theme*

5. People Who Identify as Queer, Pansexual, or Another Fellow Non-Monosexual

In late October, Lizzy the Lezzy — who I quite enjoy, by the way — shared a photo on her Facebook timeline explaining sexuality in terms of guests at a BBQ.

This would be all well and good if it didn’t include a glaring misconception about bisexual people, especially when compared to pansexuals. While bisexual people were defined as getting both hot dogs and hamburgers, pansexuals were defined as getting hot dogs, hamburgers, “and a salad.” Oops. What year is this again?

I’m going to make something very plain to you, dear reader: Bisexual people don’t just love (cis) men or (cis) women. That’s not how the ballpark definition goes. The “bi” in “bisexual” does not indicate a binary. Well, okay, it does indicate a binary, but probably not the one you think.

Instead of “bi” meaning a love for only cis men or cis women or otherwise putting men and women at two opposite ends of a spectrum, “bi” means a love for identities bisexual people identify with themselves and identities that they don’t.

Or, as the popular Robyn Ochs definition goes: “I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”

Look at that very closely. That’s still a binary. That’s still “bi.” And there isn’t a thing wrong with it, no exclusion to be seen.

When compared with the general concepts of pansexuals and queers, our orientations suddenly sound pretty darn similar: We love everyone.

Bisexual people get a bad rap for apparently being transphobic. While we’ve already seen a little bit in #3 as to why we aren’t, I want to further drive the point home here. A large portion of the transphobic accusations toward us come from the queer and pansexual communities, which in turn seem to derive from some serious misinformation and misdirection by the mainstream.

For the record, queers and pansexuals are cool. I like them. But the fact of the matter is that the misconception of the “bi” in “bisexual” as meaning an attraction to only (cis) men or (cis) women — and therefore upholding the gender binary — was created and imposed upon bisexual people by the mainstream. You know, the people that want the gender binary to stick around.

And some queers and pansexuals ate the propaganda they were fed? That’s terrifying. It starts to show just how large and sneaky the mainstream’s gender binary monster truly is.

By defining and erasing bisexuality on the grounds that it upholds the gender binary, pansexuals and queers are not only reinforcing the binary they so sorely wish to dismantle, but they are losing important focus on where the problem actually resides: the mainstream’s insistence to force the gender binary on non-mainstream groups such as bisexual people.

Further, holding bisexual people responsible for the abuse they’ve suffered is simply wrong. All that’s doing is blaming the victim. But, by recognizing and respecting bisexual people as they truly are, bisexual people can not only help dismantle the gender binary and put a new definition on the concept of the spectrum, but finally be allowed to team up with pansexuals and queers to crush mainstream abuse on non-mainstream identities.

Doesn’t that sound nice? I think it sounds nice.

TL;DR

Dear non-bisexual identities, please stop shooting yourselves in the foot and then wondering why you’re missing toes.

We’re here for the same reasons you are: for the right to love whoever we want and for the right for others to do the same.

So let’s finally be friends. We’re never going to get anything done if we keep spending our time putting each other down.