#‘not talking to you sir!’
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Zahra catching Henry in Alex’s room is a cinematic masterpiece.
#rwrb#‘your the one who decided to put your dick into thr heir of the British throne.’#‘technically I’m the spare’#‘not talking to you sir!’#‘every time I see you it takes another year off my life’#‘and as for you Little Lord Fucklory you get your ass back to merry old England right now!’#‘I want you chewing on a goddamn crumpet by sunset and if anyone sees you leaving this hotel I will Brexit your head from your body’#‘you got me?’ *walks away then turns back and bends her head* your royal highness’#she is my queen
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A h-heartfelt reunion..?
Bonus
#Sir Crocodile#Monkey D Dragon#Emporio Ivankov#Dragodile#Crocodad#My art#One Piece#We're not gonna talk about the work I should be doing rn I have Severe Procrastinitis and I'm doing my best okay#Alternative version where it was both Crocodile and Garp beating Dragon's ass before Iva-chan joined in but that was too much effort lmao#I'm a believer in Dragon being a Wind Logia so don't worry guys he is 100% taking this beating intentionally#He knows what he did and he's dealing with the concequences of his actions. With grace.#You know I realize Iva-chan should be two whole meters taller than Crocodile but we're just gonna ignore that#Look Iva-chan taking Crocodile's side and being like ''Crocoboy is right you fucked up bad Dragon'' brings me joy#And for real I've been wanting to draw this for months. But never did because I had other shit to do. Which I still do#But. You know. Sometimes you need to draw a shitpost. It's ✨ self-care ✨#And appearently One Piece shitpost comics have become the thing I draw for myself on occassion
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I don't think this guy knows what an equation is.
#he's a tech consultant#sir nobody should be consulting you on tech#what the fuck are you talking about
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balor 🥰
#fields of mistria#fom#balor#fanart#art#sir...im so in love w you...#if anyone else like me loved the fuck out of stardew but was disappointed in the romance options...please play this game#the characters/interactions/dialouge is top notch#i knew nothing about this game i found out about it 2 days before release#i thought i was gonna go for march#and immedately met this guy and just#his first line is like (im a traveling merchant) and i went (oh no)#i have such a THING for merchant characters#i can finally live out my dream of romancing volo pkmn#sort of#except not evil#i think#love that the romance options in this game are like... adults with jobs/dreams/aspirations#unlike stardew where everyone is supposedly an adult but is like a teenager??#but in this game everyone is a contributing member of society#love that <3333#the dialouge for real is amazing#anyway. it still in uhh...early access? so you cant do everything youll be able to do one day#but thats good for me bc i tend to blast through these games and do 90% of things within a week#fanart???? from my ass???#only because i love this game and him#im so fucked up for him#not me tracking his ass down everyday to talk to him#also what i love about this game is being able to talk to everyone multiple times a day#like every hour or something
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"There is nothing about Sanji that I admire" he speaks like a true Sanji fan
#talking shit about our blorbo#'because he is an idiot' incredible thank you you're so right sir#one piece#black leg sanji
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Sooo....are we gonna acknowledge Sniper's voicelines or
#every thing he says sounds like some dumb dirty talk. good god. sir. you're talking to a corpse. chill#anyway i'm an animatot btw#if you didn't know#team fortress 2#team fortress 2 fanart#team fortress 2 animation#tf2#tf2 fanart#tf2 animation#tf2 scout#tf2 sniper#sniperscout#speeding bullet
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listen We Stan Uncle Iroh In This House etc etc but I gotta say, the decision to continuously interact with the Angriest Boy Alive via riddles he does not understand and often froths at the mouth upon hearing is definitely,,,,,, a choice
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forcing your presence onto simon late at night because insomnia and a cup of tea always helps, or so they say, but you were taught better than to not offer others some but now the steaming cup is just sitting on the table to cool while you carefully sip on yours.
he doesn't look at it, you, nothing. keeps his eyes fixed on whatever he's doing, maybe cleaning his gun or something. fine. what matters is that you did your part.
and it eventually becomes routine. every night, like clockwork, he's darkening a corner in the coffee room and you've got a kettle warming. and every night, he ignores everything in his peripheral.
until he doesn't. it starts slow. you're already headed for the door, hand covering your yawn when he picks up the mug and takes a sniff. then, it's the tiniest sip, as if it's got teeth. come morning, the mug you used and his are clean, drying on a dish mat.
the following night, he waits for you to put it on the table before grabbing it. "you've a shit hand," he mutters. "left to steep too long. more bitter than the cigars price smokes."
okay. bastard. the next pot is too bland. calls it dog water. but he drinks all of it just the same. little to no sugar, splash of milk. the stare he leveled your way when he added milk could've destroyed the block.
"secrets safe with me, lieutenant. swear it."
unless he's tearing your ego into tatters with his scathing tea critique, he says nothing else. listens well enough, though. maybe. his eyes look blank most of the time. but he lets you ramble without interruption about nonsensical stuff; your day, your job, soap being the usual nuisance.
it's nice.
and then you fall ill. nothing water and cocooning yourself with your bedsheets for a day or three can't fix.
but then there's a very violent knocking on your door, hard enough to rattle it in its hinges, flaring the already painful throbbing that sits behind your eyes. no matter how hard you try to tell them to piss off, they don't.
"open the door."
now you've got a 6'2+ man barreling into your bedroom, turning his unnerving gaze your way. his eyes flick to your runny nose, chapped lips and wrinkled sleeping clothes.
"you're sick." brilliant observation. truly a man worth his sniper position.
"yes. i'm quite-" your words come to settle behind your clenched teeth as you watch him dig into his front pockets and pull out crinkled tea bags. and open your cabinets because now you're the visitor and he the (g)host.
you'd rather drink battery acid than another one of his brews. it made your eyes prick with tears, burned as it went down, warmed your chest. it was lukewarm when you drank it.
(he clears up a space on your foot table, and by clear up i mean use an arm to shove everything off the edge so he can continue to clean his weapons. has your couch always been that small?)
#he still doesn't talk#just listens to you mouth breath#what puts you to sleep that night is the constant clicking of metal against your wooden table#the next night it's his tongue#SORRY HAD TO SAY IT#ITS PURELY FACT#also mr. lieutenant sir can you let me sleep i am so tired and not everyone has incredible stamina like you do#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley
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I had an idea for a few headcanons you could do if ya want—
Maybe Sir Pentious with a reader who is so obviously in love with him, and keeps pining over him while literally everyone else but Sir Pentious himself can tell they like him? Like he's just really oblivous until reader finally straight up tells him.
Sir Pentious with a clearly in love reader!(●’◡’●)❤︎︎
Warnings!: Non!
Fandoms!:Hazbin hotel!
Author’s note!: HI HI OMG I LOVE SIR PENTIOUS HES SO SILLY!!!! I REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS AS MUCH AS I DID
Summary!: reader who’s clearly in love with our favorite snake demon
❤️Written by silkythewriter Do not steal or repost on any other platform please! ❤️
☆✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬✬☆
“Call me, you can call me
Boy, just call me (call me, call me)
While you stalling, I'm evolving
I'd give all me”
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!🐍✨Sir Pentious✨🐍!
First of all, just to get out of the way, THIS MAN IS OBLIVIOUS!!!!, Autism be damned my boy can pull without even telling!!!!!
No but in all seriousness he is oblivious to your obvious longing for him.
Everyone can see you giving him shy longing stares only for him to be ranting about his latest invention. Not only would he not be able to tell but he’d always think your just being nice!
Of course he’s crushing hard behind his bedroom door to his little eggs. Happily stating and going on rambles of how gorgeous you looked today. He’d state everything! From the new hair style you tried to the new piece of clothing you bought and wore. When I mean he notices everything I mean it, but for some reason he can’t pick up on your obvious love for him.
The way he could stare in your eye as you tell him he looks breathtaking and still think you mean it just to be nice is astonishing. OF COURSE HES BLUSHING AND KICKING HIS TAIL, but he can’t bring himself to think you like him anymore than just friends!
He’d go to his egg boys and sadly rant on how you’ll only see him as friend. And the egg boys all share one Brain cell so they can’t tell you like him aswell!, maybe they might accidentally spill, or almost spill the secret of him liking you but he quickly knocks them away before you can make sense of what their saying.
All the residents watch as you do your best to drop hints only for him to complete miss it. Even angel cringes as he watches him completely be oblivious to the obvious flirting, it’s take Charlie and Vaggie to stop him from pointing out the obvious.
Husk almost always gives Sir Pentious as gaze of just utter confusion and tiredness.
He’d gladly take flowers from you that you gifted him and take care of it for weeks on end without realizing the romantic gesture!
Alastor, as always finds it humorous, although he usually doesn’t indulge himself in romantic like things he’s find it hilarious. “Even with three eyes he still can’t see the obvious! Ha!”
Charlie tries to help to the best of her ability to help guid him the right direction but it’s just end up with him more confused. Vaggie just face slaps internally,
honestly the whole crew wasn’t having high hopes for him as dim as that is. , look! He ain’t bad looking, but not many people would prefer his clumsy self, so they were honestly hoping he’d figure it out before you possibly moved on.
Even when your upset at the obvious frustrating situation he’s still be confused while trying to do his best to comfort you.
“Well I think the man isss clearly as dumb as a rock!”
It took you starring dead in his eyes for him to question if you were alright. Before you stated it was him
The way he just stood staring at you in pure disbelief, before snapping out of it and embarrassed as his previous words. But after the said embarrassment he’s full with giddy, why of course you love him!, he’s the great sir pentious!
Yea his embarrassment would quickly turn into pride, considering he got someone as beautiful as you to fall for him.
Definition of a clumsy gentlemen, he’d open doors so fast it’d smack him in the face, or pull when it’s a push door and be confused why it’s not opening.(´ω`💧)
He’s just a silly lil guy! (⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝)
I feel like the crew in the hotel would be relief to find he finally figured out.
At the end of the night he’s squealing like a high school girl as he rambles to his egg boys about you in a new light!.
He’s gift you small little trinkets or happily spend hours with you talking!
He’s as lovesick as your are! He’s just a bit dense when it comes to accepting the fact you love.
It’s like the roles switched! Now he’s daydreaming-ly staring at you happy to have you as his, and him a yours.
Like I’ve said before! He’s a total drama queen, he can’t help it!, deny him a kiss teasingly? He’s crumbling down to the ground and holding his chest as if he just had a heart attack! (¬_¬)
He’s not at all secretive of his love for you, even if he wants to, to keep his image “professional”, he just can’t help and dote on you!
overall he’s a big dote and softy even if he tries to hide it, loves you with his whole being! ( ˘ω˘ ) He can a be a bit over the top sometimes but you’ll come to accept it! And hey who wouldn’t want a silly snake demons who’s tripping over their tail for you. Yea you got him in and over his head but he wouldn’t have it any other way. The roles have truly reversed(≖ᴗ≖✿)
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I LOVE HIS SILLY LIL SELF SO MUCH MORE PEOPLE SHOULD WRITE FOR HIM :(. TYSM FOR THE REQUEST I LOVED IT SM!!!! PLEASE COME AGAIN!!
#x reader#deez nuts#hazbin hotel#anon <3#all genders#main character#x y/n#i hope you like it#hazbin hotel sir pentious#sir pentious#hazbin sir pentious#sir pentious x reader#hazbin hotel headcanon#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel x you#silly little guy#ty for coming to my ted talk#thanks anon!#sorry this took so long#i loved writing this#i love him i swear#hes a cutie patootie#please come again!#woooohooooo#ty for the ask <3#character x reader#x you#x gn reader
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#mine#doctor who#dwedit#doctor who unleashed#david tennant#catherine tate#dw spoilers#ok i got around to watching the dw unleashed episodes and omgggg#mr. dt sir i love you so much#he looks SO OFFENDED when catherine's like 'you were talking too long' lmaooooo
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noel: *starts talking about the horrifying, manipulative ruler of the dreamlands, the Great Old One Who Will Drive You Mad*
arthur, john, and the entire audience:
#he started talking and I was like “yeah yeah babygirl we know let's elaborate on WHY”#like I'm so glad you survived the Horrors but sir why the FUCK did the king want your ass#what did you do sir I need to know#malevolent#malevolent pod#malevolent podcast#noel malevolent#detective noel#an eldritch being and his wet cat
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People keep on asking for more Baby Robin and Papadile so here is more Baby Robin and Papadile. Now never ask anything from me ever again
#My art#One Piece#Long post#Sir Crocodile#Nico Robin#Alternatively panel 5 would've been a close up of Crocodile's face from Robin's POV where he looks like he's giving her a death glare#Not intentionally he's just a big scary bastard with a Resting Murder Face and Robin is a small traumatized child#But I wanted to focus on the silliness of the moment so you get the goofy version instead#IDK man there's just something very funny to me about the idea of Robin just randomly info-dumping about a subject she's read about#And Crocodile being like ''?????????????????????? The fuck you talking about??''#Robin leaves the ship's kitchen and Crocodile just stares at the tomato like ''...It's a fruit? Forreal?''#(Meanwhile Robin is sweating bullets like ''I called his favorite vegetable a FRUIT right in his FACE he's going to KILL ME'')#Robin grew extra feet from the bottom of her feet to reach the counter and that actually isn't me trying to explain bad art away#In the original Papadile comic there was a panel of Robin doing the dishes with extra feet to reach the sink but I cut it out#(It was a stress relief comic I did not feel like drawing a complicated background in detail) (BUT YES I THOUGHT OF IT)#Nico Robin Age 11 is *more* than capable of cooking Crocodile just does not trust her with his food. At least not yet#She did start doing the dishes unprompted and continues to do so (mostly out of fear). Croc told her she didn't have to but allows it#IDK a lot of people seem to headcanon Crocodile as incapable of cooking and like. Surely Mr ''I don't trust people'' knows how to cook#Like he doesn't have to be a master chef or anything but and maybe he enjoys not HAVING to cook (pain in the ass with one hand + knife/hook#But surely he can cook decent enough. SURELY#Botanists don't @ me I know the ''tomato is a fruit'' thing isn't fully accurate this is just a silly little haha comic
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No Question
Every time I think about Zuko and Katara doing the fake dating trope in canon. I always laugh because no one would question it. In fact, it would be the most believable thing in the world. The only question people would have is, “What took you so long?”
But Zuko and Katara are so oblivious to each other's feelings that they don’t recognize that the only ones acting weird are themselves. They constantly try to overcompensate and make things more “believable.”
~0~
Zuko holding Katara’s hand: Does this look authentic? Oh, Agni, we must look so awkward. She’s so pretty, and she’s so out of my league. This is never going to work. Dont panic. Dont panic…
Katara: His hands are so warm. Don’t blush—wait, maybe that would be a good thing. It would make things more believable. But what if he figures out my feelings?
Meanwhile
Iroh: I knew they were soulmates when he sacrificed himself and took a lightning bolt directly to his heart for her.
June: I knew they were perfect together when I saw how he wore her necklace on his wrist. It was obvious he was holding a torch for her.
Sokka: I knew they were meant to be when they teased each other during the Elember Island players' performance. Everyone knows playful teasing is an act of love.
Toph who can feel their heartbeats: These bitches dumb.
#zutara#avatar the last airbender#Hakoda: I want you to know you have my blessing.#Zuko: thank you sir… I’ll make you proud.#Toph: you know he was talking about marriage. right?#Zuko: yes- wait what?!?!
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Arthur and Merlin yelling at each other just off the training field. Lancelot: What's going on? Gwaine: Mum and Dad are fighting again. Lancelot: Who's winning? Gwaine: Who do you think? Lancelot: My money's on Merlin Leon: Back to training you two Gwaine: Oh come on Leon! Don't tell me you're not the least bit curious?! Leon: Whatever disagreements that arise between our king and his consort are none of our business. Gwaine: *pouting* You're no fun. Leon: Besides, everyone knows mu- I mean Merlin always wins
#Gwaine: Lance you heard that right? He almost called Merlin mum!#Leon: You ever mention this again and I'll never kiss you again#Gwaine: Mention what? What were we talking about? Leon my beloved have I told you how stunning you are today?#bbc merlin#merlin#merthur#arthur pendragon#merlin emrys#sir gwaine#sir leon#sir lancelot#knights of the round table#arthur x merlin#leowaine#leon x gwaine
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and you may say to yourself: "my god! what have i done?" and you may tell yourself: "this is not my beautiful wife!" and you may tell yourself: "this is not my beautiful house!" and you may ask yourself: "well, how did i get here?"
time isn't holding up, time isn't after us, time is a pony ride! (images described in alt text)
#gravity falls#fiddleford mcgucket#LETTING THE [FIDDLEFORD FRI]DAYS GO BY#“sir it's tuesday” i know. my computer has been busted for two weeks so i couldn't post them when i wanted to. just let me have this#again still new to alt text. i like being a little bit silly but let me know if it gets in the way of accessibility#artwork of the damned#uhhhh yeah this is actually something ive kind of wanted to draw for years now#favorite guy + favorite band = prime high-effort meme material#also. for the record. yes i have a mcgucket playlist. yes it has three talking heads songs on it. no none of them are “once in a lifetime”#also also i know that the lyrics in the description are in the wrong order. it's on purpose. i put them backwards for dramatic effect#also also also i'm pretty sure the “time is a pony ride” line is not actually sung on the album version of the track#but if you listen to/watch the live version from “stop making sense” you will hear it!#as well as hear a much more satisfying ending to the song imo. rather than it just fading out it has some really nice vocals#basically the moral of this story is you should watch “stop making sense”#if you made it to the end of the tags: congrats! you win a prize! the prize is permission to reblog this post
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