cyrusmilee

[se-qo]

you know what they say: boop!

[rosemarydisaster]

It's raining nonstop where I am so I'm just picturing the Batfam during a flood.

Red Robin uploads a TikTok from the safety of a roof saying "watch him go!" As Red Hood keeps trying to drive his bike against the current. A big wave comes by and he's slowly dragged downhill. The caption reads "don't drive during floods".

Batman and Robin are on the ground helping civilians out of cars when the intensity doubles and in minutes Damian goes from wading knee deep in the water to swimming. The emergency batfloaties get triggered and he floats away as Bruce fails to grab him by half an inch. "Robin serenely drifting in the current" becomes a meme.

Someone takes a picture of a very flustered spoiler trying to squeeze the water out of her cape. The second she lets go the weight of the water makes her fall ass over backwards. Black Bat ends up giving her her waterproof cape.

Signal makes mirages of sharks in the water to scare the shit out of any criminals. Oracle uploads the recordings with Benny hill as background music. Bludhaven escapes the worst of the storm and Nightwing sends pictures to the group chat patting the barely wet concrete just to rub it in. He still slips on a puddle and eats shit, Barbara sends that to the group chat.

[spicy-apple-pie]

This one goes out to all my bitches that went as their favourite characters and had people asking what the hell you are all night!!

(literally me)

Commission Info / Kofi

[frownyalfred]

imagine the “Robin meets the JL while Batman is away” trope but it’s inverted. instead of being funny and interesting and extroverted all of the Robins just bolt. bolt, hide, or fight. B told them not to ever let themselves get cornered and to run if a meta sets eyes on them. so they run, they hide, and they fight back with a tiny shard of holdout Kryptonite B had embedded in their gauntlet. they dig their boots in, clench their fists, and prepare to be immovable at <100 lbs.

[apollo-arts]

I miss their peak siblingism of the 90’s

[incorrectbatfam]

Jason: For Halloween, I'm going as a disappointment to my family.

Damian: At least you don't need to buy a costume.

[mostly-frayed-edges]

[superbat-love]

Dick: [flaunting his Halloween costume] Ta-da! Guess what I’m supposed to be?

Cass: Fun Batman.

Jason: Batman having a midlife crisis.

Duke: Rainbow Batman?

Damian: Father with a fruit hat.

Tim: Fruity Batman.

Barbara: Batman finally being honest with himself.

Steph: Batman’s ‘Date night with Superman’ outfit.

Dick: …What? I’m supposed to be a Devil Fruit, guys! [points at his fruit stem headband]

Jason: I like my interpretation better.

Bruce: Thanks a lot, kids.

Dick: Well, what are you going to be wearing for Halloween, Bruce?

Bruce: This.

Barbara: You're going as Batman?

Bruce: No, I'm going as Bruce Wayne going as Batmaaan~~~

Tim: Omg, an even fruitier Batman.

[ruestheday]

one of the biggest lies the fandom with tell you is that alfred pennyworth is a good man.

he’s horrible. people just don’t realize he’s horrible because they’re all too focus on the superhero’s.

not many people in the fandom know this, but alfred literally has a daughter. her name is julia. why does no one know about julia? BECAUSE HE ABANDONED HER. it’s canon that he chose the wayne’s over his OWN CHILD. when she’s introduced in the comics she hates her dad because he abandoned her in england to raise a child that wasn’t even his.

the infamous jason “a good soldier” memorial? yeah, alfred did that. bruce wanted it taken down. alfred also left jason’s destroyed robin suit on display.

alfred is the reason tim is robin. dick and bruce are trapped by two-face and alfred just… gives tim a robin costume and sends him on his way. no formal training. no nothing.

every blame dick for damian becoming robin? wrong. it was alfred. dick was against it. alfred is the first one to give damian the robin costume, like he did to tim years before. dick did eventually choose damian as his robin, but that was while damian was ALREADY ROBIN. (he even tells tim that he doesn’t pick tim to be his robin because he considers tim to be an equal, not a sidekick, but i digress)

when bane breaks bruce’s back, alfred literally packs up and leaves. he travels. he just drops everything and goes to explore the world, until dick eventually hunts him back down.

it’s also a common theme that alfred couldn’t find the right balance between being a father figure and a butler, so he was constantly enabling bruce growing up (and still does) because technically bruce was his boss… even though he had custody of him.

edit: actually technically (in some runs) bruce’s uncle has custody of him but literally makes being absent an olympic sport But you get what i mean

[tarta-de-limon]

Halloween is over, but I forgot to post this/pain

Damian is very exigent with the candy he will consume. He does not want a stomach ache 😾

[artbyhelenhe]

pre-patrol vibes - artbyhelenhe on instagram and X

[soranatus]

Happy Halloween from Robin! By Gabriel Picolo

[newttxt]

happy halloween from the straw hats and ???

[oldmannapping]

Red Hood doing the “I am Jason Todd!” reveal but he’s got a domino mask under his helmet like a drama queen and they don’t recognise him right away.

So he gets out this little tube of solvent to dissolve the glue and he’s like, “Hang on, one sec,” while Batman, Nightwing, and Robin are standing there awkwardly wondering if they should just take him down.

And Red Hood’s trying to open the tiny tube but he can’t do it with his massive thick gloves so he tries opening it with his teeth and then it’s like, “Arg, it got in my mouth, pleh pleh pleh!”

And so he finally gets one glove off and spreads the solvent around, but it takes a little while to dissolve so he filibusters for a bit.

“You’ll be devastated when you see what I’m about to show you,” Red Hood tells Bruce, setting a 3 minute timer on his watch. “It will bring you to your knees. I can’t wait.”

And Nightwing’s like, “Jesus Christ can I just scissor-kick this guy already?”

And Batman and Robin are like, “No no, let’s see where this goes.”

And then Red Hood starts slowly peeling the mask but it snags. “Ow, fuck. Sorry. Hang on, you can’t rush this. Gimme a sec.”

And he’s just pulling the mask off in millimetres, hissing, occasionally applying more solvent.

And finally he’s standing there with this shiny red face with half his eyebrows missing like, “Ta da!”

And Batman’s had six minutes to process this because he recognised Jason when the mask was 1/3 of the way off, but he didn’t want to say anything and make it awkward.

This would be even more embarrassing if Red Hood had the mask dangling half-stuck to his face. So Batman just lets it happen.

“Oh my gosh!” he says, trying to feign surprise like a good dad. “Jason!”

And Robin’s like, “Oh wow, that was a really good reveal!” Because he wants to get on his new big brother’s good side.

And Nightwing’s appalled. “Did you steal my Gotham U hoodie six years ago, you little shit?”

[frownyalfred]

imagine being a young Robin to a Batman who occasionally trades masks/suits with Superman himself because they look so similar and one day you run into Batman and Superman in the Cave talking with each other and there’s a moment of panic when you genuinely cannot tell them apart. that’s how close it is, when they’re trying to be each other.

(it takes Dick over a year to fully grasp when it’s Bruce in the mask and when it’s not, and it’s harder than anyone thinks. because Bruce is an actor, at his core, and Clark is just as silent as Batman when in the suit, just as intimidating when he puts his mind to it. and there’s a quiet burst of fear/anxiety every time when Dick guesses and is wrong)