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boricuacherry-blog · 2 months ago

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Dorothy Dandridge - Early Life

Pictured: Ruby Dandridge on left

Cyril, however, wasn't about to just let Ruby run off with his firstborn daughter and with the unborn child. He set out to find her. And she set out to flee him again.

As a woman always searching for answers, Dorothy would often wonder how differently it all might have turned out had she grown up with the father whom she had never really known.

For Ruby Jean Butler, born in Wichita, Kansas on March 1, 1899, the rules were carefully proscribed and locked in place. All she had to do was learn to live by them, which was something that always proved hard for Ruby.

She was the daughter of George Butler and his wife, nee Nellie Simmons. Both George, born in 1860, and Nellie, born in 1870, had migrated to Kansas from North Carolina. The Butlers had four children, three of whom were sons. Ruby, their only daughter, was the youngest. For a time the family resided at 625 North Main Street.

In Wichita, Ruby grew to be a big-boned, plump, brown-skinned girl with an attractive face, smooth skin, a large bright smile, and lively eyes. As a young woman, she would weigh almost two hundred pounds and even more as the years moved on. Everyone who met her agreed that Ruby was lively, funny, and blessed with the gift of gab. People kidded that she could talk a mile a minute. And sometimes she did. Making friends came easily to her. Few who met her ever forgot her.

That drive is what carried her, by the late teens of the century, out of Kansas to Cleveland. In Ruby's mind, life in Wichita was too slow and static. In her mind, she saw Cleveland as a bustling metropolis bursting with opportunities.

And that's when she would set her sights on Cyril Dandridge. Cyril was a Cleveland resident, who was born there in 1895 and would live there all his life. For him, Cleveland represented security and order.

Most were surprised, not because Cyril had finally found a serious girlfriend but because of his choice in a girlfriend. From the very beginning, anyone could take one look at Ruby and Cyril and see immediately that they were an improbable pair: a study in constrasts - in looks, attitudes, energy, and aspirations. For the sensitive and unassuming Cyril who was content with his lot in life, stability could have been his middle name. All he ever seemed to want was a happy family life (that included his mother - he was an only child and she doted on him).

Ruby, of course, was the opposite. Always eager to talk, she was, as in Wichita, unendingly social. Energy and confidence were stamped all over her. While Cyril was pliant, Ruby was bossy. Yet, differences aside or perhaps because of them, the two were drawn to one another.

On September 30, 1919, the two were married. Having been with his mother all his life, Cyril naturally saw no reason to alter his living arrangement. He moved his young bride into the house he shared with his mother Florence. The homes in the neighborhood were modest two or three story dwellings with comfortable parlors, dining rooms, kitchens, and bedrooms that were roomy and airy. Outside were small front lawns and a patch of green in the back. They were good, solid homes in which to raise a family.

Their conflicts grew. Cyril complained that the house had become filthy. The same was true, he said, of Ruby's personal habits. Cyril was fixed and settled, satisfied with his life, while Ruby still had an ambition to perform. Finally, exasperated with her mother-in-law and the whole domestic setup, Ruby packed her bags, picked up two-month-old baby Vivian, and moved out. Just up and abandoned him, as Cyril was to say later.

She might have stayed away longer, but with no money, no training, and no profession, Cyril was easily able to persuade her back. The two attempted a reconciliation, and by the spring of 1922, Ruby was pregnant again. But for her - this wasn't good news. The idea of being housebound with two children, a meek husband, and a testy mother-in-law scared her. She decided once again to leave.

And so in July, five-months pregnant, Ruby Dandridge picked up baby Vivian and walked out on her husband for a second time. On November 9, 1922, she entered Cleveland's City Hospital where she gave birth to her second daughter, Dorothy Jean Dandridge, a name her daughter would later sign on official papers and documents but which never officially appeared as such on the birth certificate. It was simply Dorothy Dandridge. That name seems a special gift to the newborn girl for it was the very type of simple, elegant name that would be perfect for a movie marquee.

And if it were possible, Ruby would have erased Cyril completely from her memory. For many years, she managed to erase him from the memory of her daughters, who as children never saw their father, and for years were raised believing Cyril had no interest in them. For many years, Ruby even told them that he was dead. Later she admitted he was still living but claimed he had deserted them. Ruby also appeared to have severed other people and events from her memories. Years later, Dorothy would say she had never met her maternal grandfather or her mother's brothers. Cut off from family and all that entailed - family history as well as family customs and connections - both Dorothy and Vivian were raised in a familial vacuum in the belief that Ruby was the center of their world and their only support. That simply meant that later when Dorothy felt rejected by Ruby she would feel all the more insecure and lost.

Within the next few years, Ruby moved several times, perhaps because of money problems. Or perhaps she was on the run from Cyril. But always she remained on Cleveland's eastside.

On East 103rd Street, Cyril Dandridge was in a panic. He knew of Dorothy's birth. But his wife and children had vanished and he launched a search to find them. Once he finally located Ruby, Cyril pleaded with her to come back, but Ruby remained adamant. She would no longer be his wife. Hurt and resentful, Cyril finally accepted the fact that Ruby would never return to his home and that their marriage was over. But he refused to stand by and let Ruby take his two daughters away from him. He found an attorney and filed for divorce. A Colored man seeking a divorce was not a common occurrence in those years. Divorce itself was still frowned on in most of the country.

Charging her with "Extreme Cruelty," Cyril accused Ruby of lying, saying she "has made all manner of false and untrue statements" to friends and relatives about his conduct toward her. Ruby had caused him great humiliation by having him arrested on false charges and "grossly misrepresenting him in every way all to his mental distress and agitation." His suit stated that Ruby was "not the proper person to care for and nurture" the children. Cyril wanted custody of Dorothy and Vivian.

Ruby fought back. She denied his claims and requested his petition be dismissed. Instead she sought a divorce from him. She requested an "absolute divorce" from him and to have sole custody of Dorothy and Vivian, as well as alimony. The suits, counter suits, charges, countercharges, petitions, complaints, and accusations between Ruby and Cyril dragged on for years. Just weeks after Dorothy's fourth birthday in November 1926, Cyril filed a new amended divorce petition. He accused Ruby of deserting him shortly after Vivian's birth and just months before Dorothy was born.

Cyril, however, probably still hoped for a reconciliation with his wife. He made plans to visit Ruby's home at Christmas. On the evening of the visit, "Vivian and I were sleeping," Dorothy remembered, "and Mother had to put both of us in the attic so our father wouldn't find us. He was looking for us to take us away and Mother didn't want this, so she hid us." Ruby told her daughters to be quiet because Santa Claus was coming. Upstairs,

A mysterious man who had suddenly surfaced and then abandoned her without ever showing his face. In her mind, he hadn't been strong or forceful enough to walk past her mother, come upstairs, and hold her in his arms.

While the court battles continued, Ruby continued working as a domestic, while still dreaming of a life in showbusiness.

As much as Ruby was drawn to the movies, she realized that the best opportunities for her to perform lay in Cleveland's network of churches and social groups. The city's Colored churches, of which there were some fifty-three at that time, were lively social, cultural, and sometimes political centers. Activities of all sorts flourished in them. And that's where Ruby would meet a woman named Geneva Williams, who would become her lover. Known to Dorothy and Vivian as Aunt Ma-Ma, or Neva, Ruby invited her to move in with her and her daughters.

Neva was a disciplinarian. Dorothy would experience physical abuse and sexual abuse under Neva's care. Neva would manage Ruby's home and children when Ruby was at work. Once Neva took responsibility of them, Ruby became indifferent to her children and never seemed to notice how harsh Neva was to them. Neva was in charge of their singing, dancing, and acrobatic lessons.

Dorothy and Vivian would tour as a music act billed "the Wonder Children." And soon they would earn enough to support the entire family. Dorothy's beauty and beguiling manner made her a crowd pleaser. But life on the road was hard on the girls, and Dorothy began to develop a fear of live performances. Her lack of a proper education only added to her growing anxiety and insecurity. She didn't stay in school long enough, because she worked. Dorothy couldn't read for a long time, but was able to fool people into not noticing. She would memorize everything.

When the Depression hit, the Wonder Children were forced into early retirement. But for Ruby Dandridge, it was simply a minor setback. In 1929, the first Hollywood musical film to feature an all-black cast - Hearts in Dixie - was made. Ruby was convinced there would be room for more talented black performances. With Neva by her side, Ruby packed up her family and boarded a bus for Hollywood.

When landing a movie role for the girls was not as easy as they had hoped, Ruby and Neva teamed Vivian and Dorothy with a young neighbor, Etta Jones, a girl they'd met in dance class. The trio was billed as The Dandridge Sisters, and their three-part melodic harmony and youthful exuberance got them noticed. By 1935, The Dandridge Sisters were singing and dancing in films, and Dorothy was the standout star.

The Nicholas Brothers took an interest in a 15-year-old Dorothy while performing with her. "She was beautiful," said Harold Nicholas. Harold was 17 and already a show business veteran as well as a notorious ladies man when he and Dorothy met. But Dorothy had little time for romance, as her 12 years of hardwork began paying off.

In May of 1939, the Dandridge Sisters, with Neva as their chaperone, sailed to London to perform at the famed Palladium. They amazed the sophisticated European audience there.

But Dorothy was also becoming worn down by the stress of live performances, as well as Neva's overbearingly harsh rules, which included taping down the 16-year-old's breasts to conceal her now shapely figure. Neva felt threatened by Dorothy's burgeoning sexuality, and she became obsessed with the matter of Dorothy's virginity. One day when Dorothy came home, Neva was suspicious and wanted to examine her - the equivalent of a rape. Neva threw her down on the bed and in response Dorothy gave her a good punch. She knocked her on the floor. That would end the physical abuse. Finally standing up for herself, and declaring her independence from the woman who had been her mother's live-in lover, Dorothy felt empowered for the first time in her life. Upon returning to the U.S., Dorothy decided to go solo as a singer and actress. Ruby and Neva were content as long as she continued to financially support the family.

Dorothy would become engaged to Harold Nicholas of The Nicholas Brothers and star with them in Sun Valley Serenade.

By the mid-forties, Dorothy had established herself as a dynamic performer. And on September 6, 1942, Dorothy and Harold married, just eight weeks shy of her twentieth birthday. But married life was not as blissful as Dorothy had hoped. "Dorothy said to me, 'Your brother thinks more of golf than he does of me,'" said Fayard Nicholas. She would find herself vying for Harold's attention, and finding out that golf wasn't the only thing keeping him away from home - there were also other women. "I think I was too young to be married," said Harold. Dorothy became close with her sister-in-law, Geraldine Nicholas (now Branton), a woman with a lively sense of humor.

While she was getting more movie roles, the role that most interested her was a wife and mother. When Dorothy learned she was pregnant, she believed her prayers had been answered. "Dorothy was willing to give up her career for her child," said Geraldine.

On September 1, 1943, in her ninth month of pregnancy, Dorothy began experiencing severe labor pains. Believing it to be just another false alarm, Harold left his wife with Geraldine and went off to play a round of golf. For hours, Geraldine heeded her friend's agonizing pleas to wait for her husband's return - until she finally took matters into her own hands. "We had to go in the neighborhood to find a car," said Geraldine. "We finally found one after an hour or so, and got her to the hospital. But it was rather late - and the baby had already started coming."

The following day, Harolyn Nicholas was born. Harolyn brought a sense of contentment to Dorothy's life, but by the time she was two, it was clear to everyone that the toddler wasn't developing or behaving like a normal child. "She had tantrums, and she didn't know who her father or mother was," said Geraldine. "Harold couldn't cope with it." Detached and withdrawn, Harold left Dorothy to find answers alone. When doctors determined Harolyn was permanently retarded due to a lack of oxygen to the brain at birth, Dorothy was devastated. Dorothy began an increasingly worrying dependency on pills to cope. After divorce, Harolyn became Dorothy's sole responsibility. She had to find a full-time caregiver.

#dorothy dandridge

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aloe-note · 7 months ago

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A Kiss and a White Lily – Volume 3

the conflict this volume is presented even more dramatically than previous ones. take the main reveal:

towako's face is framed and lit in a way that emphasizes her actions as really villainous. it doesn't match the severity of the situation: yeah, what she's doing is really awful but you would expect this framing for something graver. the framing instead reflects yukina's perspective on the matter. it's the worst thing anyone's ever done to her.

this volume furthers the series' exploration of shapes of love. towako and yukina are constrasted in their love for each other and for the garden and what shape that takes for each of them. we also learn more about the shape of kurosawa and shiramine's love, featuring more intense framing.

anyhow.

#[av] a kiss and a white lily

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windser · 5 months ago

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lets talk more about untouchable sylus just soaking into your warmth. praying this man isn't a furnace, because more often than not youre bound to wake up in two ways: with with minimum 75% of your body just covered by this man or you pulled from your side of the bed to be spread out of his. there is no in between. literally, like no space.

and i say hoping he doesn't emulate a lot of heat, because if kicking the blankets off in the middle of the night doesnt help regulate your body temperature and you try to move away, be ready for some complaints.

it starts off subtle. just your movement is enough to stir him. you can expect a bit of grumbling as he tries to help you pull away the blankets. a light but firm arm around her body to keep you in place while you both readjust. you might get a rumbly ' are you comfortable?' before he tries to fall back under.

but if thats not enough? good luck getting away. waking him once already makes him a lighter sleeper than before. he's sensitive to the slightest twitch now. regardless of your dynamic, physically majority of the time, the man is stronger. making it very difficult, exempt from powers and authority, to reign him in.

#sylus x reader #lnd sylus #sylus love and deepspace #lads x reader #he is literally just a big doberman #he's like its only a few hours let me have this pls #;conflicted constrast

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that-starry-freak · 2 months ago

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okay, so- anissnd AUGH

They're both quite old. Older than the celestial family. Ruin being from a universe far, far ahead. Gemini being an astral. Not only that, but they both have a sense of the greater good over others feeling. But they also both can be empathetic and have conflicting feelings because they do care about people

Gemini would respect him for taking down the creators to keep cosmic order, but they'd also have mixed feelings becuase he did kill a FUCKTON of people, including universes upon universes of other Astrals. But, it was still for the best

I feel like they'd be interested by his singing and just the things he could show them in general. And I think he'd like getting to lay on them

PLUS??? GEMINI AND RUIN??? THEYRE BOTH TWO DIFFERENT, CONSTRASTING PEOPLE THAT WORK TOGETHER TO BE ONE BEING??? Castor and Pullux. Sun and Moon. Grumpy and energetic. Chat its so- anuabsuansjs

And cmon, Rin would absolutley betray them if he thinks its for the greater good. And while I'm not entirely sure Gemini would compltley betray him, they would hurt him

Plus I don't think he's fucked with star power really before, I think Gemini would be happy with that.

They're so perfect for each other guys. Idk why this wasnt a ship before

I feel like Ruin is shipped with fucking everyone lmao

JSYK THE ROXY IS THE ONE FROM RUINS OLD DIMENSION BEFORE IT WENT TO SHIT

#sillyposting #Rumini #That's what I've been calling it #Ruin x gemini

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blaiddydbrokeit · 2 years ago

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Last one before I try to sleep off my fever:

One of the key points of how I designed Allan as a character is that a lot of his story points are meant to either contrast or complement Dimitri - similar to the constrast that we get of Lambert and Rufus.

Dimitri was hurt by the Agarthans who orchestrated the Tragedy to serve their intents. Allan was hurt by the Tragedy as well - being that Rufus' regency left him vulnerable, and that the Agarthans had used blood stolen during the initial massacre for the procedure.

In a way, Dimitri sees one side of the story - the things that happened on the surface of the earth: the massacre, the retaliation, the subsequently developing racism. Allan has the other half of that same story, the things that happened underground, so to say: cruel experiments, torture, the groundwork towards even greater evils. They complement each other by completing a story that fits in itself.

And yet, in the contrast, Dimitri grows vengeful and enraged by his trauma, willing to go to any lengths to attain that revenge in the name of justice, while Allan becomes meek and avoidant from it, willing to keep out of way of those he believes he would only cause trouble for.

Even so, in their growth they once again match up. Dimitri's compassion and resolve stands out, echoing his father, while Allan's confidence and extensive understanding of Faerghus politics become more apparent when he opens up, being so harshly groomed to rule. And yet even that echoes Rufus' own political prowess. I really think it adds a lot more depth to the internal conflicts and story of House Blaiddyd, given that the story in Houses is much more about the war, that the Tragedy becomes more of a backstory plot when it should be much more with Dimitri as AM's key character.

#allan montgomery blaiddyd #fe3h ocs

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danteinthedevildom · 4 years ago

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Something I love about Obey Me is that, on the whole, for every trait a character has, they have another trait that actively counters it and thus makes them seem genuinely conflicting on a surface level, but wonderfully three dimensional on a deeper dive into their character.

E.g. People in the early-game sometimes think Diavolo comes across as a little two-faced, or that there’s something a little suspicious about him and the things he does - and I def. originally saw some theories (and when I first started playing, had some suspicions of my own) that he might end up being the real “villain” of the game.

A lot of this stems from the fact that he seems genuinely friendly, open, and willing to spend time with the exchange students in casual, informal ways, but also has abilities and moments of power abuse that seem to completely diverge from the image of the smiling prince.

Surely someone who does this is hiding something? Surely that carefree attitude is just a facade? It’s definitely the sort of twist you could expect with the character setup present in Diavolo.

But when you look at it, there’s a reason behind this duality that doesn’t actually fall into the usual tropes - and instead builds a much more interesting, well-rounded character.

(Spoilers ahead, both for Lesson 16 and for the most recent Lessons, especially involving Diavolo’s childhood.)

For instance, how could he claim to see Lucifer as a friend when he has him bound by an Oath that puts an incredible power imbalance in their relationship, and stops him from speaking of it?

The answer is that he’s genuinely never had a friend in his entire long life that hasn’t had some form of reason to stay by his side. To Diavolo, the Oath was a way of ensuring Lucifer couldn’t leave - not a way of keeping control. He wanted Lucifer to be his friend, has been enamoured with him even since Lucifer was an angel, and took the opportunity to secure that friendship in the only way he knew how.

Because Diavolo is pitifully lonely. Because Diavolo was raised in a way that left him incapable of making friends. Because Diavolo likely never would have been able to make a friend if he hadn’t tethered them to him.

Does this make the Oath any better? No. He took advantage of a broken, freshly fallen angel, terrified of the fates of his siblings, and vowed him to silence and servitude in return for their lives.

But does this mean that the Oath was inherently evil? No. At its core, the Oath was the act of a very lonely man realising he had a chance to secure the one thing he wanted more than anything. It was selfish, but not evil.

It does, however, show us the sort of extent Diavolo will go to get what he wants. He will leverage something over others if he thinks that’s what it takes. This is even reinforced by the truth of Barbatos’ servitude; that he treatened to refuse ascension to the throne if Barbatos didn’t stay.

At the same time, it shows that what he wants, more often than not, is something harmless, if desperate. It’s often a desire for companionship that spurs him into dubious action.

He’s very unlikely to abuse his power to genuinely hurt someone, but he may use his power in a way that has hurtful side effects.

Diavolo is aware that his actions had consequences, and feels guilt. He still isn’t confident that Lucifer and Barbatos genuinely want to stay with him or in his service, and he’s openly aware of the fact that Lucifer, at the very least, doesn’t see them being as close as he does.

He doesn’t want to remove either of them from his service for fear that they really will leave him, but he’s aware that keeping them there potentially against their will isn’t conducive to healthy friendships.

Diavolo has done dubious things for selfish reasons. This is undeniable. But those reasons are genuine and understandable, and something players can easily sympathise with.

That’s the sort of thing you want for a well fleshed-out character; the ability to say “there was something inherently wrong in this action taken,” but also say “I can understand why he took the action, even if it was wrong”.

I focused on Diavolo for this, but here’s another two points I can think of to further illustrate the point:

- Lucifer’s genuine love and care for his family constrasting against his prideful brutality and absolute loyalty to Diavolo above all else (e.g. how he can justify locking Belphie up in the attic. This was an act of love. The alternative was to hand Belphie over to Diavolo and let him face an unknown fate. By locking him up for the duration of the Exchange Programme, Lucifer was working to avoid being disloyal to Diavolo and being disloyal to his family. It was absolutely an imperfect solution. It absolutely had its flaws. It absolutely made things worse. But it was his way of keeping his youngest brother alive and allowing Diavolo’s dream to come to fruition. A dubious act founded in good intentions.)

- Satan’s kind thoughtfulness and amicable nature contrasting against his Wrath and how it affects his brothers (e.g., how he can switch between fretting over Beel’s mental health in one chat, to being so furious with him over his Gluttony that Beel actively goes into hiding in another. Satan is a character rife with stark dualities and his own frantic attempts to try and stitch together something whole. He’s not overly good at it. His Wrath often gets in the way. But he has spent his entire life trying to improve, to find himself, to come to terms with his creation; he is trying every day not to be the Satan that lashes out at the drop of a hat.)

The game isn’t always perfect at showing these characteristics in equal measure, but sometimes that’s the point.

It’s why, for instance, some people write Satan to be a heartless, Wrath-filled asshole, and others write him as a harmless bookworm with a knack for academia; the truth is that he’s both, and a key part of his characterisation is finding balance between the contrasting sides.

On the other hand, it’s why some people completely look over Beel as very two dimensional when he truthfully isn’t. He’s a naturally quiet demon, content for others to see him as a jock with a love of food and nothing more. But in that quiet, he hides a demon struggling with survivor’s guilt who is secretly hurt by how simple people think he really is, and has such a strong love for his family that he puts them before anything else. His characterisation isn’t finding a balance in his contrast, but finding the contrast to begin with.

That’s the point of a three dimensional character. You’re meant to be able to debate about them, and understand them while disagreeing with them. You’re meant to be able to view them from different angles and see something new each time. That’s half the fun of them - that’s what makes them interesting.

I won’t lie and say the game’s great at this all the time, because sometimes it is really, genuinely not, and sometimes even Solmare have a tendency to forget some of the deeper aspects of their characters for the surface-level stuff.

But for what is there? There’s so much interesting craft at work in the characters, and it makes taking a closer look at each of them - and how different players view them - so, so enjoyable.

#obey me #obey me diavolo #obey me satan #obey me lucifer #obey me beelzebub #I'm really not too sure what else to tag this as?#It's really just a little bit of character analysis asdfg

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ignitification · 3 years ago

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i feel like the heroes are making mistakes that will cost them another big loss

Deku is acting on his own trying to protect his friends when in reality by making himself more vulnerable he is making the situation worse for everyone (also he is suddenly a badass at everything so yeah)

Endeavor's situation is weird because he got the support from his family, promised shoto they will work together to stop touya (he remembers this specifically) but then refuses to call him back and acts on his own be it from fear of shoto getting hurt or the fact that it is him taking responsibility for what HE caused and trying to fix this it is still wrong because he is the last person who can bring back or stop touya considering he is his abuser and at this point he STILL doesn't understand his own mistakes to an extent. i know you might say he wouldn't kill touya but it really scares me that he would probably try to mix being a hero with killing touya and a father by dying WITH him thinking this is the way to go for it

Well, the heroes have been making mistakes since the beginning. This is a heated argument, especially since we know that the system upholding the pro-heroes and their actions is faulty at its core. But surpisingly, they suffered very little losses (I mean, the most important victims have been Night Eye and Midnight, and both died in 'battle' - not for actions aimed specifically at maiming them either, making them basically casualties),and this comes back to your argument. Where heroes SHOULD have rationally been punished for their mistakes, there are - in constrast - very little instances in which heroes suffered the consequences of their actions. This is why, the All Might Death flags are raising, especially with the last chapter (as I wrote here). This is even more evident from what you point out about Izuku: I don't entirely think that Izuku going off on his own is a bad thing, but honestly, apart from his encounter with Stain and in the long term his encounter with AfO and him saving Shigaraki, I am at a dire loss with his character. He is evolving, in a good and meaningful way, but at the same time he poses a question in terms of continuity of the narrative and lets pop up questions such as: so, where is this exactly going? What is he trying to achieve by detaching himself from All Might and going off on an 'urban legends' path? Do these two things have ties to each other (as I think they do) - and if they do, is going off and leaving AM behind a parallel with what Nana has done before, leaving Yagi and also then exposing him to the dangers of being a (past) OfA user? (In the first panel, there is a Nana-shot, which makes me think, that the one being left behind is somehow an All Might's trait, as or he is being left behind by those who he cares about or he is ahead or everyone else.)

As for Endeavour, I think that besides everything I said in last asks, I don't think he will confuse his duty as hero and as a father by killing Touya and himself with it. It would be a very much waster trope, and just a terrible conclusion to the Todoroki plotline. Touya is definitely surviving this until the end, but I think that Endeavour sacrificing himself for Touya might come later into play, when both duties mix up (exactly as you say, and exactly as what is happening in E's head in this right moment) and he has to take a decision which he thinks might be of him as a father and yet reflect his own duty as a pro-hero towards society (shaped as Touya vs villain Dabi). Now, this is a discourse which has a lot of nuances (and that I really don't want to get into as of the moment), but the baseline is that there is very little risk of Touya dying, especially by Endeavour's hand (it just would not make sense in the slightest, and it would completely kill any possibility of Endeavour's atonement that Horikoshi is so hardly structuring and fighting for). I am sure that Shouto however will resonate more in this speech than Endeavour, and that ther emighr be some conflict of interest in between the three but as I said I think it is a tad too early to worry about this (or worry at all, as the three main villains are going to be saved and gonna be alive at the end, contrary to All Might). So please don't worry, as things are slowly making sense and every loose end will be tied (hopefully).

#:sba #sunn answers #mystrangers #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #todoroki family #all might #yagi toshinori #midoriya izuku #dabi #todoroki touya #endeavour #todoroki shouto #anti hero society #bnha 317 #bnha ask

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cacaitos · 11 months ago

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long as hell.

again this is not about whether both should or shouldnt have it but that im pointing out that missing element (seen through constrast) that stories abt conflicts with fathers usually have (in my experience). and partially im gonna have to emphasize on father-son ones to make the point, bc there's already a strange fixation with father-daughter (assumed straight) issues getting sexuallized (or rather how it shapes the parties' romantic/gendered relationships), thing that's not taken so much for granted for w sons.

and obv in a similarly inverted way with mother-son relationships (general), hell even mother-daughter relationships have a cetain part of that element above the father-son (imo, ovb). that is, after all bc the Mother (not even the material perception of the housekeeper, i mean the like, idealized concept of a mother) is the common element.

and like once you start seeing the difference (which you can feel generally through how writers write female characters to begin with) you become progressively aware of like, this- voyeurism- that instensely one-directioned observation half-thirst half-scrutiny of their body (esp on stories that are intentionally provocative/cheaply morbid). and a scrutiny both in the general way female characters are designed and the 'comfortable attractiveness' of it but also on a idk pretty raw- idk im missing the words for it rn- way. but say like you were seeing a body and its organs each as translucent parts, or an open up anatomical illustration, as in by sections; a body that serves a function and is shaped to be enjoyed or be useful for someone else. so then you see this consumptive quality that same body aquires on story nor rarely in a not metaphoric way- yk that thing that children feed off their mothers, monsters that eat their fleash and blood as an extention 'of the natural (if hyperbolic) order of things'. that filial safety if need-be gets to, even without freud in the world, shorthand through the womb or whatever. people's ambivalence towards breatfeeding and the aspects around it. so on.

so in the OP i used first the sexualized aspect for effect bc it's a more idk tangible, more common easier to grasp, focused feeling as an expression of objectification, and that i wanted to see how far i would go without mentioning the male gaze lol. not again as used for media sexualization itself but as the general set of hyerarchies of priorities of what characters, what experiences, whose perspective get focus, expected expectator, who's subject and whos object, etc in media. not as in like the Men Enterprise That Does Excecutive Media Decisions way. duh.

that being clarified, and again with the pseudo-cannibalistic scrutinization. obviously im using more horror-oriented imagery to say it there but i guess it's once again for effect, to speak to that always-providing source of comfort, satiation, serving, compassion, sacrifice idea of the mother. in this framing the Role of Mother is the one taken from, Provides but by giving themselves inside out, whether they self destruct in the process of not. add as an extention the feeling of being enveloped, trapped, pulled in, that i mentioned days before. and so for this i mentioned even mother-daughter are a step above father-son, in the situation presented in OP.

these blocks of text to get to the fathers now. repeating that, in contrast to the stereotypical Mother Relationship, fathers', as a starter, in stories tend to lend more on distance, abandonement, [which i don't really know if to call less intense than the small-town-big-hell obsession of the mothers', maybe it's just that i personally don't find it compelling so idk if to make that assertion]. not like it's crazy to say that it's a feature of the patriarchy, unavailable fathers unavailable sons (or the feelings of children of unavaible dads in general), The Cycle etc.

people either can't or don't want to get That Close with their dad, and by close i will have to clarify that that includes intensely negative emotions, and not only strong but contradicting in the way that it makes it hard to untangle and distance oneself away from said father, like with mothers, yk like that usual ***"more constantly and vocally complaining about and feeling more 'obviously negative' emotions towards Mother but still loving (or feeling more attached/***emotionally dependant) her than with Father", that's the trend im pointing out/noticing lately. and even worse to acknowledge that icky tepid mutually vulnerating feeling of say, hating and being hated combined with loving and wanting the whole wheight of their love if the both involved are men, in the social contract says men don't feel like that, or those emotions, or that intensity or even feel than much at al; some sort of mutual neutralization. a woman, wife-mother- whatever, can externalize those feelings for you, and heterosexual relationships allow for a more 'adecuate' kind of environment for vulnerability.

or add that by the same priorities of the male gaze (if at least in contrast to femcharacters) people do not invest the same amount of effort (won't, or wouldn't occur to do, consciously or not) to not only sexualize but also in the same intrusive, hungry, scrutinizing intensity i mentioned above. not only with those feelings but with the same idk, Entitlement of the object's availability, role, power dynamics. i think this is true even when the one sexualizing men is a woman [in notably HeterosexualTM ways], not bc i think they're ontologically incapable to do the general action or to do it at all, but bc when they do (in my experience, most usually) they lack this sense of Entitlement, that gets diluted in the oh so tiny details informed by internalized sexism; or very vocal, anyway. idk why it gives them so much trouble. not even saying that Um Objectifying People is Good, but that even when it happens, happes like that (again, in my experience).

SO. being that 1. Literally Not Being There is a bit more difficult to squeeze emotionality out of 2. cishet relationship's stereotypical structures Are A Thing That Exists 2. by the patterns of male gaze it is not in the main insterest of people to sexualize or portray their emotional world in quite specific compromising and vulnerating ways AND intensity.

sorry the reason why dads aren't on people's minds as much is bc people don't or can't bring themselves to objectify-sexualize them. double edged sword.

#txt #*** and not only more- maybe smaller yes- emotions in quantity but also more basic and immediate emotions.#AGAIN EVERYTHING OF THIS IS COMPARATIVELY.

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vnckocurzyca · 4 years ago

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New chapter new analysis

I’m publishing it one more time because it didnt show in tags for some reason???

I put it under “read more” so maybe now.

I finally read translation so I can finally write something about the new chapter. I know people’s strong feelings towards it and I think it’s totally understandable huh

I, personally, liked this chapter even if I think it was creepy as fuck. But I know Jun’s work and how she writes her stories and I know that she purposely made it really uncomfortable. I think this chapter was made to be upsetting because what happened during it was kinda important?

Warning; LONG POST (contains spoilers to new chapter)

First thing - Noe was forced to see some Vanitas’s memories. Of course by Misha eyes, but still it’s Vanis past. And as we know already, Vanitas REALLY didn’t want Noe to know about anything his past-related. He even threated him that he would kill you if Noe would someday try to drink his blood. So it’s opening for totally new conflict. We have two options

Vanitas would come to place and see Noe drinking Mishas blood and it would be horrible

Vanitas wouldn’t see it and Noe would live in sting of remorse and we know how emotional Noe is and it would be also horrible. And this option also has 2 options

Noe would finally tell Vani that he drank Mishas blood and it would be horrible

Misha would tell Vanitas that Noe drank his blood and it also would be horrible

When Noe started drinking Mishas blood he walked into a trap and there is no escape now. Vanitas is going to KNOW this and its going to be a problem, because knowing Vanis past, memories and emotions was a borderline in their relationship - Noe didn’t get a permission to step over it. And now he just... steped, because of Mishas blackmail.

Also the whole scene was made to be creepy - we can clearly see that Noe is distraught and scared and uncomfortable. We can hear his thoughts, we can see his terrified face

He is terrified for A LOT of reasons. A lot.

He is scared of Domis life. He don’t know what is going on with her and she is unconscious and she can literally DIE. Domi is his best friend, his childhood friend and nearly all family he has left. Domi is the closest person to him and he can’t just lose her like he lost Louis.

He DON’T WANT to read Vanitas’s past without his permission and knowledge. Its awful, it’s non consensual and non-con it’s something Noe hates, because, even if he would like to know Vani’s past (what he said back before Gevaudan arc) he don’t want to know it without Vanis consenst and he didn’t push. And now he is forced to see them, to betray Vani’s trust.He, probably, hates himself thanks to it.

He is blackmailed, bullied and intimidated which is bad on it’s own. He has absolutely NO CONTROL over a situation, he is absolutely subordinated and can’t do anything to change his situation. It’s scary.

He is forced to drink blood, which is a really intimate and delicate activity for him. He hates being forced to drink blood and forcing to drink blood, and, additionaly, Misha is a kid. Or, at least, he look like a kid (it’s hard to say his age for sure and how many years their past with Moreau happened). It’s gross, creepy and weird and Noe feels it. We can see him backing away from a fucking kid.

Jun did it purposely. Combine all of it, to made the horror moment for him, probably to break him in front o Misha.

The running thing in Vanitas no Carte is motif of Noe not having any control over anything in his life (even without his noticing). Noe never had a control over anything.

He didn’t have a control over his life during childhood, ie when he was sold on auction

He didn’t have any control over Louis’s death and curse. He couldn’t do anything to save him or to save other kids back then. He could do nothing.

He don’t have any control in general - he was trained by the Teacher to be his pupil. Noe don’t even know how big control Grandpa de Sade has over him and his doings.

He didn’t have any control when Domi found him at Orloks. She just kidnapped him to Altus.

He don’t have any control over his relationship with Jeanne - anytime he wants to talk to her or about her he is interuptted.

He didn’t want his blood be sucked by Ruthven and he didn’t want to Swear.

He don’t have any control now. He didn’t wanted to know Vanis past non consensualy, he didn’t wanted to drink Mishad blood, he don’t want to see Domi in this situation.

It’s a writing continuity. We are being told how little control Noe has over his (and others) life. It’s becaming a plot point. MochiJun knows what she is doing. She purposely made the whole chapter creepy and unsettling. She need us to know that what is happening right now is wrong - not only drinking blood from a 1/4 naked kid, but also the rest. Everything. That this chapter is traumatic - we literally touched Noes trauma, Domis trauma and Mishas trauma over a few pages and panels:

Dominique - we can see how she reacted to Louis death, how she wanted to make Noe feels better, why she changed her hairstyle and outfit, how she hated herself because it was her brother who died, not her. We can see it now - she is depressed, she hatees herself and would prefer to die over Louis. She was easy to catch for Misha.

Noe - we can see that he can do anything for Domi because she is his last friend, his family, last thing (person) he has. He can’t lose her, he is desperate and traumatized over Louis death so he can do anything, even suck Mishas blood and know Vanis past even if he hates it and its wrong for him.

Misha - we can see thanks to his flashbacks that it was hinted he was (if I undertand english correctly, sorry, it’s not my first language) se*//ually abused as a child. He thought his mother was possesed by devil, it was traumatizing on it’s own, but he was also dressed as a girl, physically abused and hit by his mother and used during her “sessions” with clients. Then he was kidnapped by Moreau who, probably, was experimenting on him just like on Vanitas - so Misha was abused again. And later Vanitas killed “father” what also traumatized him. His behaviour towards Noe it’s not really that suprising - its horrible and sad and heartbreaking knowing why Misha is that way, but its logical. It has sense. It’s just how his trauma made him.

Sooo do I think what happened in the chapter was good or okay? No. It was creepy and made me feel sick. But do I think Jun is bad for making it this way? No. I think her work is great, because she actually did planned it logically. She delivered TONS OF INFORMATIONS by only one chapter. Tons, about a lot of characters - Misha, Vanitas, Noe, Dominique, even Roland (he know Misha is one thing, but, also, why he was so beaten up? What happened my man? Who hurted you?) It wasn’t just gross pedo-fanservice some people accused it to be. (even if it was gross anyway och my gos this scene with Misha standing over Noe was frightening, I was just as scared as Noe, I felt like I was in his place and I was looking at Misha)

Also! I’m pretty sure one of the reason for Misha undressing his collar a little bit was for us (and maybe Noe too) to see his possesion mark on his arm. For some reason we, as an audience, need to know this.

But! We also get a lot of different informations -

Domi is a royal guard and is working in castle, so she probably knew Luca before and had contact with him or some other royal people. i think it’s interesting that she worked at castleas a royal guard.

Luca probably likes Domi and was worried about her. Also after knowing she is missing he decided to took direct actions, he is not passive.

Misha has Vanitas of the Blue Moon’s possesion mark on his hand. It’s really interesting, especially when we know that its his prosthetic arm. Somebody tried to cut his arm with a possesion mark and I bet it was Vanitas or Misha himself. Yet it DIDN’T work, mark of possesion is still here, above his prosthetic.

Noe “don’t know anything about Vanitas”. It was an important sentence. It was something that Noe need to know narratively speaking. It’s pushing the story forward, because Noe’s and Vani’s relationship is the core of the story. It was literally told in the first chapter that it’s a story about their journey.

Misha had a lot of bruises on his whole body after he was rescued. We knew he was beaten, but we could also see it’s evidence.

Mishas face when Noe drank his blood was similar to his mother face when a vampire drank his blood. It wasn’t accidental, we were shown his trauma and how it’s affected him.

Next thing I noticed:

In this panel, Misha looks A LOT like Vanitas. Og course he has child features and chubbier face, he has white(?) hair and eyelashes ets, but his mimic, his gaze, how one of his eyes is covered by hair and his words. Its literally how Vanitas’s panel would be draw. It’s really Vanitaish.

We also got some questions, like:

What happened to Misha and how he lost his hand?

What Luca ordered Jeanne? (probably to check out real Paris and maybe find Domi or Noe)

Why Mishas mark of possesions was so important for us to know?

Is that Roland met Misha in the past important?

Why was Roland so beaten up?

There was also one more thing. Jun is operating in her story not only by making parallels betweend her characters (ie Teacher and VotBM, or Astolfo nad Vanitas, or Louis and Domi etc) but also contrasts. The biggest contrast motif on the story are probably Vanitas and Noe thanks to not only their history, but also their appearance, personality, design of their clothes, their height, their names (Vanitas being related to death and vanity, Noe being related to saving and something biblical etc). Their whole characters are made constrast. And so we got here:

Vanitas and Misha are not made parallels, theyre made contrast.

Misha is looking from the upside, Vanitas is looking from the above, Mishas hair is white, Vanitas hair is black, Vani has a shadow over his face, misha is lighted. Misha has white eyelashes, Vani has black. Misha looks calm an suprised, Vani looks stressed. Their whole “atmosphere” is different. Even if Misha is bruised in this panel he looks clean, even angelic, when Vanitas looks... bad, he has dark circles under eyes, wrinkled eyebrows, bandage etc. They’re made to contrast themselves, not to be compared to. It’s the next hint about their role in the story I suppose. That they’re not similar, they’re not the same and there is something basically different about their roles.

I would also like to write about shadow and light work in this chapter, but I’m just really tired right now, soo here it is! My analyze od the new chapter, or, at least, the most important parts of it (for me). I liked it in general, but it was... stressed and I was anxious about this chapter for the one whole day. But in general I think Jun did gods work with delivering informations she wanted to delivere.

#the case study of vanitas #vanitas no carte #vanitas no shuki #long post #vanitas #misha #dominique de sade #noe archiviste

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readingsbylibramc · 3 years ago

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birth chart reading for @m4gn3tic

hello! welcome to your reading. I’m gonna give you a quick overview of what I’m going to analyze about your natal chart. feel free to ask me anything if something isn’t clear, of course. you’ll find out your dominants’ influence on your persona, your physical appearance, impression on others and the way you approach the world; your ego, identity, the real you; your reactions, your desires, inner emotions; your way of expressing your feelings, your mind and ideas; your desires and approach to love; your energy tank, instincts and temperament; in-depth analysis of each house with their rulers and analysis of heavy aspects; love life + soulmates/karmic partners interpretation; your relationship with your friends; your family life; your approach to career and work in general + possible jobs suggestion; your style, fashion sense analysis; life purpose and past life description; basic transits’ analysis to describe your current mood and, last but not least, your secret skills, how to make the most out of your soul and manifest what you desire based on your birth chart.

🦋 chart shape, dominants

your chart is a seesaw shape. your life focuses on different ideals and interests, often constrasting between each other. from one side, this gives you the ability to be adaptable and find solutions easily. on the other hand, you may struggle with balance; for example, you might find yourself dedicating your life to your relationships, neglecting your ego or viceversa. you need to learn how to harmonize these energies.

your dominant planets are venus, the moon and the sun. you are definitely a very creative individual, you have an eye for aesthetics and you're probably very artsy as well. you are confident and you have a very charismatic personality, people usually look up to you, even though you could sometimes be quite stubborn and sensitive to criticism.

your dominant sign is taurus. you're a chill person, you prefer staying at home instead of going out and partying. you are quite stubborn, but that's because you're passionate about your ideas and beliefs. you prefer trying and take action, even if you risk to hurt yourself, instead of just standing still and observing. you find comfort helping others; it's a way to feel satisfied both with others and yourself, as you like proving your skills and talents.

your dominant element is fire. you have a warm heart, even though it may be covered by your confidence and independence. in fact, you always strive for the first place. people may be intimidated by your presence, as you're a serious competitor. thanks to this competitive nature of yours you may be very positive and optimistic, making you a good and supportive friend/partner.

🌎 ascendant in sagittarius, 22° / 3rd decan ruled by jupiter and the sun

you see the world as an adventure. I feel like you typically don’t relate to sagittarius ascendant stereotypes; sag risings are usually very happy-go-lucky, they smile often, but pluto being conjunct to it may change things a bit. you’re more of a loner, you’re not as extroverted as other sagittariuses. you may relate more to scorpio rising, actually. ironically, you often look sad or angry. you have a knack for philosophy, and your favourite is most probably ‘you only live once’. you tame dying before making the amount of experiences you want to have in your life, hence you could even be impulsive sometimes. you’re the type to always be up to crack a joke or anything that can make you and others smile, yet when someone gets against you, it’s over for them. you have quite of a sharp tongue, you’re pretty blunt and straight-forward. in fact, you may often get in troubles due to your impulsiveness, which may be misunderstood. you have an incredible charm to you; it’s not like taurus’ or libra’s, those are more related to physical traits. sagittarius people, on the other hand, are surely very talented at something; maybe, at school you were one of the best students, and everyone recognized it and appreciated you for that; people understand your potential, and you may often receive compliments for your skills. basically, your personality is charismatic. due to pluto being conjunct the ascendant, I feel like you may even struggle too much with pessimism during your first years, but in case you are, you shouldn’t be. jupiter is also your dominant planet, and it’s willing to give you the best of luck if you respect its themes. hence, you need to have faith in the universe and be optimistic. try to look more at the positive sides in life and even in people. physically, sagittarius is all about abundance, hence you may have trouble losing weight. you could have big bones, or at least something bigger on your body that doesn’t make you look like a model. you’re more on the thick side, in fact you probably have a wide bone structure, with wider hips and/or thick thighs. you could also have wide shoulders, and something big and memorable on your face as well. maybe you have a very distinctive nose, or perhaps your eyes are almond-shaped. your forehead and lips could be pretty wide as well. I’ve also noticed that sagittarius people have a very lively sparkle in their eyes, even though they may be very dark. it’s like having two/three tiny diamonds at the centre of each of your eyes. last but not least, you may have freckles and very curly, or at least thick, hair. you may also have very dark hair / features in general, and perhaps you have long limbs too.

gemini venus opposite sagittarius ascendant: this aspect makes you more sociable and prone to interact with people. you’re also most probably very attractive, people are naturally drawn to you. the downside of this placement is that you may suffer from self-esteem issues, as you really care about others’ impression of you. maybe you’re a little bit clumsy too. it’s easy for you to gain popularity, but be careful as it’s not always good. popularity brings scandals too, so people you see in your everyday life could possibly start gossips around you. the good thing about this aspect is that you emanate loyalty, so you usually choose loyal and trust-worthy partners. this placement may also bring issues and problems in marriage with your future partner, even though I don’t think it’s your case. your venus is well-placed, so I don’t think there’ll be serious problems.

sagittarius ascendant square virgo jupiter: you probably learn a lot from people around you. you're most likely surrounded by wise, spiritual and possibly foreign individuals in your life. they help you to grow up, both spiritually and mentally. this placement also softens your introverted plutonian image, making you look more outgoing and approachable. you're also very open-minded, and you rarely have prejudices. the downside to this placement is that you may be depend too much on your friends or lovers, especially when it comes to your beliefs. you're easy to influence, and you may change your mind often if others disagree with you. you could possibly have high expectations from others, creating a false idea of those who surround you. at least, you're aware of your abilities and you have the potential to make the most out of them, but you're modest about it. you don't come off as bossy, as other jupiter - asc aspects would.

sagittarius ascendant conjunct sagittarius pluto: pluto, combined with your sagittarius rising makes you look a little bit naive. people may try to take advantage of you, and to defend yourself you tend to become bossy. you’re really competitive, and feel the constant need to prove others’ wrong, even though it’s not the best way to do it. in your life, you could encounter lots of enemies that may try to stop you from transforming yourself. or maybe, your grandfather is an authoritative figure in your life and in your family’s in general, and his influence has a big impact on your life. also, something I’ve noticed about pluto conjunct ascendant individuals is that they may feel unhappy when they’re young. as time goes by, they transform and become as they want, which makes them feel more satisfied with themselves.

🌞 sun in leo, 14° / 2nd decan ruled by the sun and jupiter

just like the sun, you shine brightly. you're confident, independent, brave and friendly. you're the only who can handle your life, no one can tell you who you are, what you want or what you need. sometimes you can get insecure, as you feel pressured to always be perfect. you try to be nice and kind to everyone, as you don't wanna be seen as someone unpleasant to be with. even though you may be into gossip and rumors, you try to avoid being involved with them at every cost. the thing with leo is, you're either loved or hated. no inbetween. some may admire your confidence, assertiveness and determination, others may be jealous of you. you have celebrity-like presence, you don't go overlooked. you're most probably the life of the party, and you enjoy living a life full of fun and amusement. you're also amazingly creative. with your heavy leo influence, you have the potential to do and achieve whatever you want, you're very resolute. even though you look very open to getting to know new people, you're secretly very picky about who you call your friends, or even when choosing a partner. you always try to be perfect, and hence you want someone that looks and tries just like you do.

🌙 moon in taurus, 4° / 1st decan ruled by venus

the moon is exalted in taurus, so it's definitely a good placement! you're very peaceful, you try to avoid conflicts when you can. this placement makes you crave stability, whether it's financial, in love etc. you must be very stubborn, as taurus is a fixed sign. this placement, paired with your imaginative leo energy, makes you settle on making your ideas concrete, and it's very beneficial. it makes you capable of achieving any goals in your life. you're also very artsy, and you may fancy particular art styles. you have a good eye for aesthetics, and you care a lot about the looks of your house, body, clothes etc. you have excellent concentration, and that is another thing that helps you achieve your goals and make your ideas concrete. last but not least, you're amazingly patient, and that makes you a great friend. probably, they vent a lot of their worries to you, as you're also a great listener.

🗣 mercury in virgo, 8° / 1st decan ruled by mercury

you have a very logical, pragmatic mind. ironically, this creates contrast with your leo energy, confusing you as you may act differently in different situations. you try to be as well-spoken as possible, especially with strangers, but when people get on your nerves you can’t help but kill them with your words. before expressing your opinion on a certain matter, you like making sure that your thought actually has proof to be supported. you’re very analytical, and hence you also overthink a lot. especially when it comes to people you care, you start overthinking so much about little things like late replies to messages that you create a variety of hollywood-worthy scenarios in your head. you also pay lots of attention to details, and you can’t tolerate typos and grammar mistakes. you always try to speak and write in the most correct and polite way as possible. you may have an elegant, yet neat handwriting. your voice probably sounds very calm and collected, yet you don’t have any problems speaking at a louder tone.

❤️ venus in gemini, 29° / 3rd decan ruled by mercury and uranus

this is the flirtiest, most romantic gemini decan, but also the flakiest and most indecisive. your flirting style most probably includes jokes, teasing… things like that. even though you may seem flaky, as you like experiencing romance with different types of people, you’re actually quite picky. in fact, in order to fall for someone, you need to feel mentally attracted to them, not just physically. someone ignorant and stubborn that doesn’t care about learning something most definitely isn’t for you. you’re not the type to be super romantic and sweet with your partner or just people in general. you show your affection for example by sending them memes, making ironic jokes about them etc. also, when you’re into someone, you probably get very talkative! you start asking them simple questions about their life, even things like 'did you have lunch?’. also, you talk about them with all of your friends, and you find yourself thinking costantly about them. you’re very curious of nature, but you’re only interested in getting to know what catches your eye.

gemini venus square virgo jupiter: you come off as a very positive, happy-go-lucky person. you're extremely friendly, and this makes you be good at social relationships. you may have lots of friends, or at least you have the potential to make many if you opened up and talked to them. yet, while this energy gives you positive vibes, some people may take advantage of that, as you could easily be mistaken for naive. people can try to dominate you unconsciously (sometimes even on purpose) not only in relationships but even in friendships. aside from that, I don't think this placement causes you many problems. you may have the tendency to procrastinate and not work. you could be quite lazy and get easily distracted, as you're constantly with your head in the clouds.

💥 mars in leo, 27° / 3rd decan ruled by the sun and mars

praise and success are what motivate you the most. your main goal in life is being praised for achieving your goals, you wouldn't feel motivated without compliments. therefore, you put energy in things that make you feel confident and noticed, as you enjoy being seen. for example, if you feel confident being well-dressed, you could spend hours in the closet to look how you want. you are very creative, you get an energy boost through creative outlets, and hence your hobbies (reading, writing, dancing, singing, drawing, etc.) recharge your battery. this placement also makes you very extra, especially with people you're close to. you may gesticulate a lot, you could as well enjoy mimicking others' voices. you're basically very dramatic, you look like an actor when you react, but at least you're very fun and entertaining to watch and listen. this placement, it gives you a strong charisma that, and combined with your sagittarius rising, it makes it impossible not to notice you. you could overreact from time to time, and you may also be particularly pessimistic, but above all you appear as someone very bold and strong-minded.

🏡 houses

your 1st house is in sagittarius, with also chiron placed there. you come off as someone very sympathetic and bold, you're probably the fun one in the family or in your group of friends, even though pluto's presence conjunct the ascendant may delay this energy. you are very charismatic, you have a witty sense of humor and people are always pleased to have you around, as you're able to light up the room. people always see you as someone easy to talk to, someone trustworthy. you probably have great problem-solving skills or, otherwise, you just ignore your problems and wait for time to heal. you're also quite spiritual, you may be sensitive to higher entities and you could possibly also be religious. chiron is also here: your deepest insecurity is your appearance, your identity. it may be that when you were younger, you used to struggle a lot with your appearance. you could have been bullied, or perhaps you could have suffered from an eating disorder. luckily, this placement can get better. in fact, you can gain wisdom from this wound of yours; you can heal others who have self-worth issues once you start loving yourself.

your 2nd house is in aquarius. neptune and uranus are also placed there. your relationship with money isn’t stable at all. you may often go from periods where you earn a lot of money and possessions, to other times where you lose all of them all of a sudden. same thing goes for your self-esteem, it fluctuates a lot. you find beauty and aesthetic in material things; you most probably love clothes, art, music… anything that isn’t exactly a priority in life, but that allows you to express your personal taste, which is very refined. this placement makes you very creative, and hence you could make money out of your creativity. it would be a great way to find a job and become successful, but also to increase your security and confidence. you could even be a very innovative person, and with your leo sun you would make an excellent leader / boss. you could also make money through internet or with technology in general.

your 3rd house is in pisces. when it comes to speech, you’re most likely more introspective. you may not be much talkative, and most of the time you keep your ideas and thoughts to yourself, but actually it's hard for you to hide them. you may be secretive, but you're easy to read. you learn the best when you’re close to creativity or imagination, you’re very intuitive and hence it's easier for you to learn new topics. while you're very empathetic and you're able to properly convey your thoughts and feelings in your speech, you may also come off as sensitive or even insecure. you may have a quiet voice, and hence you could come off as shy. on the other hand, you may have the tendency to lie, or just being confusing in any way. you may not always express what you want crystal clear, as you want to able to modify the story just in case you encounter some hardships. also, you never truly express your feelings, probably out of fear. you’re always vague, and you keep your private matters for yourself. pisces is a mutable sign, so you may also find yourself changing ideas often, your mind wanders from one thought to another.

your 4th house is in aries. while outside you may appear as very polite, when you feel comfortable you actually become way more fiery. you’re very impulsive in your home environment, you could have been some sort of warrior in your childhood. maybe you used to argue a lot with your parents, perhaps because they were too overprotective. yet, I don't see any kind of trauma. you may have a very strong emotional bond with your family, even though you may argue often as you're all pretty sensitive and impulsive. you could be particularly attached to your mother, even though you used to argue a lot. the moon is also sitting in this house: your privacy and security are the centre of your life. you need to be and feel emotionally stable to fully take advantage of all of your skills; for example, if you argue with a loved one of yours, especially if it's someone from your family, you could get very unmotivated to do anything. you need to feel complete to function correctly, and when you can't, you rely on material goods; e.g you may overeat, buy a lot of useless things out of stress, drink... anything that apparently helps you to cope. on the other hand, you're very affectionate, even clingy at times, but your feelings are very pure. because of that, you may also be extremely sensitive, you could be afriad of others' judgment for example.

your 5th house is in taurus. you are a very creative, artistic person. you’re able to relax by watching netflix, eating, writing, painting… anything that can be done at home. you’re not the type to hang out too often or party all night, you’re more of a homebody. you could also love sleeping in, just being able to stay in bed all day wearing comfy clothes is a vacation for you. you always try to be at your best state, and you want those who surround you to be perfect too. it's hard for you to fall for someone, as you take everything in consideration: personality, physical appearance, fashion sense... it may look like it is too much, but once you find the right one that truly satisfies your standards, you're in for a long ride. you'll want to travel, live your life in the best way possible with the person you love.

your 6th house is in gemini. in your daily routine, especially at work, you have to communicate a lot. you come in contact with lots of people, or maybe you write stuff like blogs or books. generally, you have a very hectic schedule, as you have different hobbies and appointments that you can’t abandon. this placement indicates that you may be prone to overwork yourself, as you put a lot energy in your job. you could be quite superficial in a certain sense, and you’d risk to waste your potential with as you may take your job as a challenge, for example, you need to feel mentally stimulated to like it. in fact, your ideal career has to include something that allows you to express your personal taste, ideas and interests. in this way, it won’t feel too heavy to you, and you’ll find pleasure in working. as for your health, you may have problems with your lungs. you may suffer from anxiety or asthma, for instance, or anything that doesn't allow you to breath properly.

your 7th house is in gemini. saturn and venus are also placed there. in a partner, you seek someone intelligent that is able to keep up with your rhythm. you don’t have time to nurture someone, you want them to fully understand you. in fact, you may be more attracted to older partners, as they’re supposed to be more mature. I don’t see many issues arising in your marriage life, it will probably be very peaceful, but it may take you a while to find someone you like. you’re a picky person when it comes to love, you want someone hard-working and responsible with a big brain, yet they should also be quite outgoing and funny. you need mental stimulation, someone that is a constant adventure for you and that is worth exploring. maybe, you're actually afraid of falling in love; or perhaps, it's the opposite: your risk-taker sagittarius energy made you jump into relationships, even if they weren't actually your priority. it may be hard for you to fall for someone, but once you do, you're totally invested in them. you're quite of a traditionalist when it comes to love; you may the type that prefers being courted, rather than court yourself. you're also quite into clichés, and you're looking for a polite and ambitious partner. someone who has a stable job, and is also wealthy. basically, someone that looks (and possibly is) rich and noble. you may also have the tendency to date people that are older than you, and possibly also soulmates from your past lives. in fact, you attract many karmic partners that are here to teach you lessons. your relationships may be quite painful, or at least they're so intense that they are hard to forget. with this placement, it's also recommended to get married after your saturn return, hence after your 28-29 years old, to avoid any kind of challenges.

your 8th house is in leo, with also your sun, mercury and mars sitting there. you have the potential to become a very successful individual, with a great amount of charisma. yet, since the 8th house is related to pluto, the malefic planet of transformation, there are some hardships to this placement. in fact, you may have the tendency to look down on people that aren’t as open-minded as you are. I have the same placement, so I understand that it’s not easy at all, but you should learn to accept respectful people’s opinions. if you do that, you’ll finally be able to glow brightly. you’re very curious when it comes to taboo topics, you like learning about them. you’re probably into conspiracy theories, as well as matters like astrology, tarots, horror, tragedies, mystery... you can use them to transform yourself and grow up, so you could definitely use this birth chart reading to improve yourself. 8th house is also the house of karma, and yours is kind of strange. you may often feel like you’re right about something, e.g the sky is blue. you’re very proud of your observation, but then it turns out to be different. it’s like the universe is constantly teaching you new things. luckily, this is something that gets better with time. you’re an extremely goal-oriented person. you want to be the best at everything you do, not only to be better than others but also the best for yourself. you’re very astute, it’s impossible to trick you, and you always find a way to be in charge and get what you want. yet, you can get quite obsessed about your goals, that you could do extreme things to get what you want. in fact, people with this placement can even manipulate others, as they’re totally capable of doing that. in addition, your sun being in leo makes you extremely charming. people are naturally attracted to you, you have a way with words, and hence you’re always able to convince others into giving you what you want. but luckily, this doesn’t turn into manipulation, you probably don’t even realize this skill of yours, and hence you don’t use it to damage others. you are very persuasive, but you don't do it on purpose, you could actually be a little naive. when you get angry, you could actually get scary, though. your emotions are very intense, it’s hard to calm you down.

your 9th house is in virgo. at school you were a very diligent student; you were practical, precise and organized, you enjoyed studying at being the best in class. yet, you could be quite bossy at times, as you could come off as a bit too arrogant but you're just very dedicated. on the other hand, you're also very intelligent and open-minded above all, you could feel particularly drawn to foreign cultures and languages and you could be naturally skilled. you may also get to travel a lot or even move abroad at a certain point in your life, you're definitely a citizen of the world and you hardly ever have prejudices.

your 10th house is in libra. you have an eye for aesthetics, and you want to have a reputation for looking classy and mannered. basically a lady, but that knows how to stand up for herself. in your ideal career you need something that makes you express your need for beauty, possibly even justice. you may have a passion for poetry and literature in general, or maybe you could be particularly skilled at fashion. you have a natural talent to match colours with undertones, body shapes, vibes etc., and you could make this particular ability of yours a job. you’re also a charismatic, strong-willed speaker, hence you could also do well as a lawyer, a politician, an activist etc.

your 11th house is in scorpio. you are extremely picky with your friends. you have trust issues, probably caused by your karmic issues again, that make you secretive around your friends. you may close yourself in your shell, or maybe you actually know a lot of people, yet you only consider a few of them your friends. most of the time, you may also befriend people that try to take advantage of you, people may betray you often. or perhaps, since there’s a possibility that you understand that, you could be the one who leads the group and acts quite bossy. this is something that gets naturally better with time; actually, your friends will be of great help for you to grow up. you may have big dreams for your future, yet you may feel intimidated as they’re very intense, and hence hard to make come true. you need to pay your karmic debts in order to finally feel comfortable with others and have the motivation to achieve your long-term goals.

your 12th house is in sagittarius, and pluto is also sitting there. you're particularly interested in religion and higher beliefs, hence meditation would be effective for you. yet, you need to get enough sleep, or you could not be able to fully embrace the spirituality of this placement. you may also be able to have prophetic dreams, or at least they have a strong moral beyond them. possibly, you could make lots of good dreams, even though you do have many nightmares as well. perhaps, your dreams could bring you luck; for instance, you may dream about the winning numbers of the lottery, or maybe they may warn you about certain people or events in your life that could harm, you are strongly connected to your higher self.

❤️ love life, soulmates

in love you attract gemini, aquarius, libra, capricorn and taurus. your future spouse will most probably have capricorn, aquarius and libra placements, hence they’ll be very hard-working, intelligent and witty, but also very sarcastic and a bit moody. it may be love at first sight, and you may find them very attractive. you may also meet at work, or you're going to be introduced to them by your family or friends. you'll most likely also meet them abroad, they may be foreign or at least they have a different cultural background from yours. or perhaps, you're going to marry someone older than you, and you meet them later in your life, around your 27s/28s and so on. your children will be heavy in taurus and libra placements, hence they’ll be very creative and quite lazy too, they'll probably love eating and they will like playing around. yet, they could be a bit too stubborn and sometimes materialistic.

👶🏻 family life

your mother is a very fiery person, with a short-temper. she could have sometimes even been quite violent with you during your childhood, and she might have a bit of a childish behaviour. deep down, she’s actually kind of insecure with her role as a mother. she may have aries, libra or cancer placements in her chart. your father, on the other hand, is more submissive. he’s a peaceful person, even though he most probably has a passive-aggressive behaviour. you could actually have a better relationship with him rather than with your mother, or at least he understands your needs better. he may have libra, cancer or scorpio, as well as aries in his chart. if you have siblings, they most probably have pisces, capricorn or aquarius placements in their chart. you have a great relationship with them, even though it could have been a while for you to get along. overall, your relationship with them was peaceful.

📊 career

you could do well at a variety of jobs to be honest! with your gemini in the 6th house you could actually work in different fields before sticking to one career, hence you’re pretty experienced. I certainly see you being successful in your career, you will most likely work alone and you'll most likely be a boss or even famous. you're very hard-working, so I can see you having your own business for example. otherwise, you may also do well in an aesthetic field, you probably have great creative talent. you may be an artist, a creative director, a screenwriter, a writer, a singer, a musician... or even more practical jobs like lawyer, judge, possibly also a therapist or psychologist. you'll settle down on a career that will make you feel emotionally fulfilled, you'll truly enjoy what you do. you may possibly also work with other people, you may have to interact with others for your future job. you could work in a field related to public relations, or perhaps you may even work abroad or with people of different cultures from yours.

👕 fashion sense, style analysis

I imagine you put a lot of effort into your outifts, yet you don’t show it. you want to look effortlessly good, you don’t want to give the impression that you tried. your style may be quite minimalistic and simple, with lots of jeans, sweatshirts, plain t-shirts… I see you being more into natural shades, like white, grey, beige etc. you’re also not very fond of using too many accessories, you’re stylish but still very simple. you have this natural charm to you, hence you still look good even though your outfits may not be too complex.

👁 past life, life purpose

in your past life, you were very career-oriented. you were probably extremely successful at work, it was your priority. you could have even been someone important for your career, who knows. yet, this lifetime you don't need to focus on work anymore, you're already a master at it. now, you need to solve your issues with your family and create a family of your own to fully accomplish your life purpose. there may be some ups and downs, but this is what your soul has to learn in this lifetime.

🤔 major transits analysis / august 24

transit virgo sun is currently conjunct your natal leo mars in the 8th house: you may be feeling a bit impulsive these days, you could argue easily with others so be careful with what you do or say. these arguments could be particularly painful for you, so try to avoid them. also, with transit jupiter in your 2nd house conjunct your uranus, you may come across unexpected luck in these days, so pay attention to any signs! they were most likely meant to be.

🧿 manifest what you want, secret skills

the best way for you to manifest is idealizing and acting at the same time. you have both energies combined in your chart, which is great actually! I’d suggest you to first picture what you want in your life, and then do something concrete to manifest it. for example, let’s suppose you want this gucci bag; first, think about it deeply. then, you could try going into a gucci shop and just walk around, maybe even touch that bag. you’ll get results if you believe it! it’s also great to write and read/listen your own positive affirmations, such as 'I love my gucci bag’, 'the gucci bag my mom gave me is amazing’ and so on.

and this is it! thank you again for booking a reading, hope it resonated with you :)

- libramc xx

#astrology

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darrowsrising · 4 years ago

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I’m sorry to bother you with this, but it has been on my mind since my friend told me. My friend trusted me enough to confess that these books, Red Rising books, were their safe place and comfort. I never read them, so I started to look up information to understand my friend. That’s how I came across your blog, and my question is… how can books with so much tragedy be their safe place and comfort?

You don't bother me, anon! This is such an emotional question, so please bear with me, it will be a very emotional answer. This is why it took so long go answer it as well.

I feel like the Red Rising Series just...gives you things that burrow into your heart and once there, they never leave. So your heart aches for the characters, the events, and everything in between.

The entire series is hopepunk, that's why I believe people are so keen on returning to this series, especially when times are hard. Things are not easy at all, tragedy and pain stalks at every corner, but...it's the hope that keeps on giving.

I mean who could resist a bunch of outsiders and insiders and everything in between, all united under a guy who makes their heart sing in tandem with hope? Darrow managed to bring everyone together and everyone of them just kept on pushing their own boundaries and they all found a family together.

So I think it's the love, the kindness, the sense of togetherness and the friendships that makes one think - that's my comfort series. Because we all want to belong and be inspired to live on against all the odds stacked against us.

I also think that Howlers (the fans) like that the characters are allowed to feel, you know? The rage, the helplessness, the loneliness. Their feelings are valid. You have no idea how much I longed for to read about someone who rages like I do, and not to just vent and scream at the void with helplessness, but with spite, with determination with that 'Oh, yeah? Watch me!'.

The characters are extremely relatable and the more you read about them, the more you get to know about your own self. I have been reflecting on that a lot and I could talk about it on and on, but it's too personal to be of interest, yet it was extremely helpful to me.

Pierce lets his characters feel everything. Even when their mental state is bad. Even when they don't have time to process their own feelings, he always goes back on them. You see, feeling sad, anger and every other negative emotion, is not bad in itself. People need to feel them, it's actually healthy. For example, one has to process grief, not bury it - that is why it's more painful when Darrow gets a reprive from having to bury his feelings. Pierce doesn't brush off on mental health - his characters struggle with it, war always leaves its scars upon them. But he also gives the characters healing, which feels natural and doesn't rely on some stupid trope like 'romance/sex heals all'. They find meaningful friendships, find a purpose and goal. When they break, they find love and comfort from their found family and with that support they try get up and try to move, step by step, forward. That doesn't mean they are healed, though. It's not an immediate or permanent thing, it's a journey.

I think their ability to feel things is the most validating and relatable of things. Yes, there are characters who repress things, conditioned by Society or not, but even that is well-written, because you just know there are more to them that this shell. Many of us hide, we don't talk about what's stressing us, what tears us up inside. Especially when we know that opening up means being dismissed, our feelings invalidated.

So, reading Red Rising almost feels soothing. Because you know the characters, you feel connected to them with some sort of shared pain. You feel encouraged that even though they've been through a new hell several times, they have emerged, maybe not all of them and those that did, did not emerged unscathed, but they always find some will to live, even if it rings a bit hollow at times.

And the hope...the hope is not wanked to hell in flowery sentences. It's not just some word that makes you shrivel up and die faster, because it feels more like toxic positivity than actual help.

Hope is genuine and inspirational. And I long for that on my bad days, because among all the tragedy and pain of that universe, to make me feel hopeful is...monumental. When I am alone, I look at the books on my shelf or at a picture of Darrow and remember that connection I feel for the series and the hope. And it's a bit soothing. As corny as that sounds, anyway.

I also think that the series is inspiring. It makes us question ourselves, our own biases, the way we act towards others. But most of all, it inspires us to hope and to do. To move, even if it's a little bit. Everytime we rebel, even a little, against a corrupt system, against toxic standards, against casual maliciousness, against opression, it's more important than we might have originally thought.

And the forgiveness. I am not a very forgiving person, at least not until I've processed every emotion. But there are moments in Red Rising that made me work on that ability of mine. Sometimes, forgiveness if so poorly used in some books, that I come to hate the book itself. But the way Darrow forgives people and how he holds a few exceptions was extremely realistic to me and very profound and well-written. When Pebble boxed Thisle's cloak in MS, and said 'Howl on, little Thisle!', I shed tears. It was a small moment, but it was so powerful, I had to take a break. Thisle was a traitor and for such shallow reasons that I didn't want to forgive her, but...oh, hell my heart hurts even now. It was so meaningful to me and so are so many other moments.

There is also the constrast between the bad stuff and the good stuff - the good stuff hapenning in these books are always so much sweeter and precious.

I literally don't know what dlse to write or how to write it, but I feel there is so much more to day. Guess that's a bonus point.

Howl on!

Later edit: there is also the way that Pierce makes certain things realistic, besides the ones I have mentioned in this post. For example, the war theme is something Pierce insists must be realistic and I agree with that because we see the effects, all of them, reflected directly and indirectly. It tackles various issues with war - why it is necessary against extreme regimes, why war makes it so that even 'the good guys' have to do questionable things if not wholly bad, how war is not just the conflict, but also a battle for information and deceit and many other things. It really makes you think, you know. I love books that make me think.

#pierce brown #red rising trilogy #iron gold trilogy #darrow of lykos #red rising #golden son #morning star #iron gold #dark age

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