#// i included the entire panel because it looks awesome

[every-sasuke-uchiha]

[i-heart-hxh]

is Killua truly jealous of Palm?

Yes, I absolutely think he is!

It's never explicitly stated, but the subtext is so in your face in a few different ways that it's essentially not even subtext any more.

Togashi could have chosen so many different ways to portray the way Killua feels about the Gon/Palm date subplot, but making it clear over and over again how bothered Killua is by the whole situation absolutely reads as jealousy, especially within the larger context of the arc. Look at these especially!

Togashi puts so much emphasis on Killua's expressions and distress throughout the whole subplot. Of course it's partly intended to be comedic, but this situation with Gon and Palm does have serious emotional weight for Killua as well--pulling out the needle, his breakdown in front of Palm, what she ends up saying to him after that, etc. I do think the exaggerated and extreme ways Togashi expresses Killua's feelings are intended to make the audience go, "Oh, he's really jealous, isn't he?"

People can argue Killua's reactions are just because of who Gon is on a date with (someone unhinged/violent and much older than him), or that it's just "concern" about Gon because of his nen situation, and those are both definitely aspects of what's going on here--but to reduce it down to only that ignores those deeper emotional impacts it has on Killua. I think the protectiveness aspect is something Killua uses to veil some of the other things he's feeling about it even though of course he is legitimately protective of Gon in this situation (and he has good reasons to be so). I also think Togashi himself uses the ambiguity to his advantage here, because if he put in romantic jealousy that was any clearer, would Jump allow it?

The way Killua goes immediately from the topic of going on dates/being freaked out about the prospect of Gon having been on dates before to feeling heartbroken because he wants to be with Gon forever the next panel is telling, in my opinion... (The English translation is a little vague, seems like it was intentionally toned down. In the original Japanese version he says he wanted to be with Gon forever.)

Here's a post where @tjlnn22 and I discuss this weightlifting scene in more detail.

I firmly believe that a big part of Palm's role as a character is to get the audience to question the nature of Killua's feelings for Gon. Without considering this context, the way her character is set up from the beginning and what role she's intended to play in Chimera Ant Arc is confusing. But when if you look at her character as having been built for that role, suddenly her entire character and subplot makes sense. Here's an older post where OP talks about some of the framing of Palm's character, and then I talk in more depth about why Palm is written the way she is.

It especially makes sense when you consider that the date with Palm is one of the factors that destabilizes Killua's faith in his relationship with Gon, leading to him wondering if they're acting together as friends or just as teammates. Here's an awesome post @tjlnn22 put together and submitted to me on this topic, with specific details supporting this argument. I think this is an important part of the arc that gets overlooked, and I love how clearly it's laid out in the linked post.

Killua also acts dismissive of Gon worrying about Palm to the point where other characters comment on his behavior, which to me seems like another sign of jealousy and bitterness on Killua's part. Then when he encounters Palm again after her transformation, this is how he behaves towards her:

Hands on his hips, full sass mode here. Again with the jealousy...

...And then shortly after this he proceeds to have a total emotional breakdown when he admits to himself that he thinks maybe Gon cares more about Palm than him, and that Palm might be the only one who can help Gon, rather than Killua. Of course there are more factors than this behind his breakdown, including him getting pushed away by Gon prior, but this is DIRECTLY the thought that leads him to start crying and then sobbing on the ground.

The Palm subplot is one of the biggest things in the series that makes me confident that the romantic subtext around Killua's feelings is completely and utterly intentional. The way the whole subplot is constructed, the decisions Togashi makes around Palm and how she's presented as a character, the way Killua's reactions and emotions are emphasized with regards to it, and the significance of this subplot in the greater arc of Killua's character all show a great deal of thought and care, and it's hard to come to any other conclusion when looking at it carefully.

Thank you for asking!

[xannador]

Thank you!

A big thank you to everyone who got a copy of Mostly (h)Armless! I think that for an obscure little fancomic it did really well! About 30 copies have gone where none can ever take them away again. I've also finally received my own version and I am happy about the quality.

I've now unpublished it but turns out you can never entirely take a book off the store once published. You can't edit it to be something else either. (which is what I had hoped to do, I have a bunch of unpublished original comics lying around). So it's just kinda going to sit there for all eternity, unavailable for sale. I sincerely hope it won't give me problems later on.

Anyway, if anyone is curious about one day printing their own comics, here are a few things I have noticed that I will definitely remember for my future printing endeavors:

Most glow and blending effects like Lighten, Color dodge, Hard Light, Linear dodge (add), etc don't look that nice in print despite looking awesome in digital.

Make your line art thick enough.

soft shading looks bad, cell shading looks good. (But it's better to fully fill shapes with a contrasting color rather than doing fancy lighting.)

Consider shading in black rather than color. (optional)

Details and soft lines are usually lost and a waste of time (Mostly in case of a colored book. Black and white may be different)

Keep panels spaced far enough apart.

Draw big panels. Small panels aren't as nice to look at and the eyes are naturally drawn to the larger panels.

Gradients don't look very nice either. Unless they have a light color.

Vintage comic textures and effects actually looks nicer in print than digital (which surprised me).

In dark scenes, rim lights are essential to make the character pop out. M(h)A would've looked like ass if I hadn't added those.

Stay away from the borders of your page, especially the left and right ones. Not just for the text but for the drawings too.

Keep track of which side of your page will be closest to the spine, keep a distance from that side especially. Because your book will be folded and part of the page will be hidden (the thicker your book, the more will be lost).

fancy panel compositions are cooler in digital...

contrast contrast contrast...

Don't be afraid to use pure black a lot.

Don't be afraid to use white a lot.

The 3D shake effect is also not that cool on print. But looks gorgeous on digital.

To myself… keep the font size consistent…

If text is outside a text bubble, it should have a high contrast stroke

Text should always be high contrast in general.

Motion blur is really cool in digital but not so much on print.

Keep black silhouettes black, avoid adding any kind of subtle glow or texture.

Text bubbles can have color but they should be light (again high contrast) watch out for saturated green or blue or red. Test in greyscale. Contrast should be more than 70%.

Line art should not be colored. Keep it black for print.

Hard borders are better than soft borders. On everything.

white panel borders are better than black panel borders.

But white borders with a black stroke are probably the best (cause more contrast).

Again light colors are better than dark colors. To do dark scenes it might be better to just use black and contrast with a lighter color.

Line art perfection is not that interesting, especially in regards to hard surface shapes like robots. (Might be personal taste though. I enjoyed looking at robots with messier line art more than those where I did perfect brush strokes.)

Beware dark blue and purple...

Compositions and colors of both the left and right page should always fit together. I think I did that pretty well here at least.

If possible make your total amount of comic pages devisable by 4. (so 24 pages total, or 28, or 96, you get the idea) not including the cover and back. Or else add a little extra drawing to fill the remaining pages.

I think that's about everything I can see based on my own print. I'm sure that a fair few of the things that I found looking worse in print than digital could be resolved by just being... better at converting your files. There's the whole CMYK color mode thing but in my personal experience that has been such a pain to work with, and each time my prints looked worse attempting to convert the file rather than had I just left it in RBG and let the printer do the guessing work for me.

So if you're like me and you're hopeless at this technical mumbo jumbo printing stuff, I think just avoiding the things I mentioned while drawing should get you well under way to having a nice print. The most important thing to remember is that digital and physical media are two entirely different beasts and if you are interested in getting your comics printed it's easier to adapt your workflow to that from the start rather than going back and altering. A lot of the mistakes I made here are rookie ones and I should have known better. But it's very easy to get lost in the process once you've started. I hope to improve my next print significantly. Once I can make RBG look good, I might try CMYK again.... Maybe. Potentially. No.

Hope these tips can be of service to somebody. They'll be a useful archive for myself in any case. If anyone wants me to elaborate more on a specific point, I'm happy to explain.

[randomthefox]

I've actually been looking forward to this one

So let's see it! Let's see Evan Stanley turn what SHOULD be a total one sided curbstomp win for The Chaotix and TAILS and AMY ROSE who SHOULD be able to COMPLETELY FUCKING DEMOLISH these clowns and nobodies into Clutch somehow pulling off a win. You KNOW that's what's gonna go down. You KNOW she HATES the Sonic cast so fucking badly that she's going to have them lose even though this should be the most noncontest in the entirety of the franchise history. Let's watch.

AND RIGHT OFF THE BAT we have Rough SOMEHOW getting over Vectors scream WHICH IS A FULL SCREEN CLEARING ATTACK THAT DESTROYS EVERY ENEMY IN THE ROOM IN SONIC HEROES

and just grapples his jaws shut. Also Stanley still doesn't know how to write Rough and Tumble.

fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off

OH! OH AND CLUTCH SHOOTS AT TAILS WITH A NORMAL FUCKING GUN! AND TAILS FLEES FROM IT! AND HIDES IN THE RAFTERS TO EVADE THE BULLETS!

INCREDIBLE!

AMAZING!

I'M NOT INFURIATED AT ALL BY MY BOY TAILS BEING ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DISRESPECTED BY THIS COMIC AT ALL!

And what the fuck is THIS bullshit why can't Vector just fucking slam his jaws around with the force he used to fling Espio and Charmy at giant stone walls to shatter them to pieces like he did in Sonic Heroes to shake Rough off?

What the fuck even happened here? Charmy rolls FORWARD underneath the gunshot, and then he's suddenly being held by Rough? What? That's so much off screen action that it's actually incomprehensible. And why would Charmy roll FORWARD instead of BACKWARDS *away* from the person shooting at him??? Charmy was taken hostage because Evan Stanley wrote Charmy being an idiot in a truly nonsensical bit of sequential art that is borderline visual gibberish. Awesome. Really living down to all my expectations for this fight scene.

"oh no"? OH NO?

FUCK OFF, WHO IS THIS AND WHERE IS AMY ROSE? YOU'RE AMY FUCKING ROSE, JUST CHARGE FORWARD AND SMASH ROUGH ON THE FUCKING HEAD, WHAT'S HE GONNA DO?

This is so fucking stupid, this is actually so much stupider than I expected it to be.

"Just don't hurt Charmy" gotta love the infantalization of a character that has helped fight Metal Overlord before. Gotta love the insinuation that Charmy is in ANY kind of danger right now. Hey, remember how I brought up before how it's weird that the comic never shows rings? Surely if this comic was canon to the video games, the characters should at least be paying lip service to the lack of rings they have on hand, to lend credence to the danger Charmy is in right? "Oh no, Charmy doesn't have any rings, so one snip of those crabmeat claws could spell game over!" No? Right, this comic is written by people who hate the video games, so lord knows we can't have anything like that included.

Again, what the fuck is even happening here? What was stopping Charmy from kicking his way out of the hold in the first place? What did Espio's thrown ninja star even do? Did the ninja star cause Rough to let go of Charmy? If so then why is he still kicking him? Did the ninja star just loosen his grip enough to allow Charmy to kick him? How would it have done that? Why was the ninja star even needed?

The sequential art for this fight scene is really bad. It's genuinely hard to even discern what the fuck is even supposed to be happening.

TAILS

DIDN'T

EVEN

FIGHT

TAILS DID NOT EVEN TAKE PART IN THE FIGHTING AT ALL

TAILS WAS ENTIRELY ON FLY BELLE TO THE CONTROL PANEL TO HACK OPEN THE DOOR DUTY! TAILS DIDN'T EVEN DO THE HACKING HIMSELF! IT WAS ALL BELLE! TAILS LITERALLY JUST FLEW BELLE TO THE COMPUTER!

TAILS ENTIRE ROLE IN THIS FIGHT SCENE WAS BEING A VEHICLE FOR BELLE! HE DID NOT FIGHT! HE RAN AWAY FROM THE FIGHTING! HE DIDN'T EVEN DO THE HACKING TO OPEN THE DOOR HE JUST CARRIED BELLE OVER TO IT! BECAUSE GOD KNOWS THIS COMIC OC IS SOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER AT USING COMPUTERS THAN FUCKING MILES PROWER WOULD BE

Wow that was somehow even worse than I was expecting it to be. Good job comic. I fucking hate you.

[hana-bobo-finch]

woah!!!!! it’s pdbc characters lore dump time (can’t call em OCs when half of the ones listed are technically not……….whatever)

tis but a brief summary of a few characters bc I can’t get into them fully, or we’d be here all day. but nonetheless, quick overviews and quick doodles. just because.

uurghghghg first of all Gourdie. I think I’ve mentioned her before? I love her heehee. I would get into the whole fish daughter more but she doesn’t have a set design yet soooo. anyway yeah Gourdie. she is great. she somehow survives by the end but at what cost!!! did not mention it here but one other thing is that she’s accidentally killed someone!!! Whoops!!! It was in self defense, kinda, but even with the almost nonexistent morals most of my characters have that’s still a universal no no, so she never told anyone and blamed it on a bear attack (why a bear would choose to kill someone by throwing a rock at them instead of, yknow, mauling them, is something that was somehow never questioned). anyway I love her

mmmm next up is less of a fleshed out character and more so just…whatever it is. Couldn’t really get into the details of it all here but maybe I will in the future cause I think the illusions are cool………mostly just mentioning this fella bc he’s important to The Lore. Also noooo I can’t believe I forgot to mention it here, but like I said before, Turtlemeister was (maybe) the one who summoned this thing in the first place!!

my beloved……uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu love her SO much. hey guys look it’s one of those ocs that aren’t technically original. Don’t even ask how I managed to twist a character who was in the source material for 7 panels into one of my favorite characters, I don’t know either and I don’t want to think about it too hard bc it makes me feel like a very bizarre person. I wish I could get into her more she is SO awesome and funny. I feel like she comes across as really depressing in the description but she really isn’t lmao she might be a Little traumatized but no more than everyone else….she’s just chillin half the time. UUUURRGHH love her so much……………unfortunately she is, as I said, dead. anyway who’s up next

OH GREAT HEAVENS.

NOT EVEN GONNA TRY TO FIT EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FREAK IN ONE IMAGE. WHAT THE HELL. TOP 10 PUMPKIN DADDY OF ALL TIME. ERM. UH. WGHERE DO I STAFT. HUH. UHHHHHHH so he is objectively the best and if you disagree you’re wrong. favorite character ever he is the only reason PDBC exists. genuinely will not be able to list even half the things about this pumpkin bastard but I will rapid fire go over whatever pops into my head first

Has a citrus fruit addiction. Allergic to horses. License plate is NOVFD. once ate part of his own leg by mistake because it was in a roast beef sandwich at a concert. is scared of gloves (except for one (allegedly) magical glove named Lucretius). Is scared of King Arthur and the knights of the round table. was once a professional wrestler but had to quit because his opponent Tried To Fucking Kill Him. That’s kinda an important aspect I should go into more but I won’t because this is long enough already. Anyway. hates saltine crackers. technically has hundreds of children depending on what you count as children. they’re not biological children they’re…….ehhh that’s not worth getting into. sorta like the whole fish daughter thing but way more complicated. Has some weird biyearly peach scavenger hunt tradition??? learned to break the laws of physics and all he did was make a beach on the ceiling. is a pyromaniac and has set so much stuff on fire. Including himself but that was by accident. Has a complete monopoly on almost every business down to the smallest of industries like umbrellas. Has a band that makes…songs of debatable quality, on topics such as leprechauns. Somehow has never killed anyone. There are hundreds of thousands of people who want him dead. He likes banana bread and will break into your house to give you some.

As I’m typing this out it sounds like his entire purpose is to be random but I can assure you this all has explanations and he’s surprisingly rather normal. just wanted to clear that up back to what I was saying

He has a grudge against a family of woodpeckers (they wronged him). He has Many Mushroom Memorabilia. He has a bunch of pet mice, his favorite of which was tragically killed by some sicko working at a home improvement company. His dead mice are laid to rest in a mausoleum (GET IT???? MAUSOLEUM??? MAUS!??? GERMAN FOR MOUSE! ! ). he has a medical condition in which your brain physically operates too quickly which can lead to adverse side effects. the second the first snowflake falls he decorates for Christmas (including a living deer with LED lights tied around it). He’s friends with a little alien named Blarg. He has an abnormally low body temperature. He hates Mickey Mouse, and a moth named Michael moth (I think that’s its name?) because it eats his ties. Oh yeah he’s an ungulate, don’t remember why. Has pet llamas whose hair he uses to knit sweaters. Once got hit by a plane. Has had hundreds of thousands of strokes. Has fallen off a mountain (the incident was filmed and used in a commercial). Has the bizarre curse to constantly injure his heel. Once gave out baby pigs that he rescued from a slaughterhouse. Worked in the mines. O’chunks from super paper Mario crashed his wedding. He likes the letter M. He’s scared of snoopy. He’s allergic to turkey. Has little gopher versions of himself. Gets attacked by bugs often. Has high serotonin levels. Absolutely despise mystical creatures called Dinkies and would exterminate them all if it was allowed. I have no idea if he’s dead or not he just disappeared with only a cryptic email left in his wake. A skeleton once threw chemicals at him. Has a cat named shart. Can play guitar and piano. weird….cat….thing….I don’t even know man I can’t explain any of this in a way that makes sense. Maybe someday I will go into further detail but for now you just get an incomplete list of random things I remembered. he has a cohesive narrative I proooomise. if yall want a complete deep dive into him I will provide you with such, but unless there is demand I will spare you guys from having to deal with all of that stuff because it is A Lot.

anyway. face burning in embarrassment. here are my silly little guys thx for reading (coughs up blood)

[adventureofthedancinggirl]

Ch. 409 thoughts

First off, can we all just take a moment to appreciate the realism that is Baby Katsuki?

To the people who are like, "Lol why is he's such an ugly baby?", Have you ever SEEN an actual baby right after they're born? That's EXACTLY what they look like.

I really wish they kept the taglines in the official translation because The world should know that Katsuki was raised with love

愛を受けて育ち成長し��少年は

I love the way Katsuki's growth was highlighted in this chapter.

The things he said in those flashback panels weren't wrong. He did make his skills his own (knowing his weakness to rain and overcoming it by coating the explosive sweat and setting a trap for a delayed explosion). His explosion also can pull off pretty much anything, it seems. Including bringing himself back from the dead. However, it's that mindset shift from his focus on being number one, and seeing everyone else as "extras", to understanding that he can't do it alone that really stands out in this chapter.

I think this panel is underrated

頼む (tanomu) 爆ぜろ (hazero)

The way it's framed and All Might yelling at him to dodge makes it clear that if his plan hadn't worked, he probably would have been dead (for real this time). Even though he trusts in his power, Katsuki obviously knows he's taking a gamble. He's not overconfident and he's praying that his plan actually works.

Lots going on here...

First off, AFO pulling an early-Katsuki and calling Katsuki an "extra" in his story and Katsuki telling him, no, this is OUR story is everything.

Also, Horikoshi-sensei really wants to set the record straight with all the Katsuki theories, huh? What? You think he has OFA? Nah, his ONE quirk is enough.

I'm skipping over all the yelling because as awesome as those panels are, there's not much to analyze there, but...

Lol...Hi, Hawks.

AND THERE'S THE CONTEXT (for that last line in ch. 408 that I wrote an entire translation analysis about)

Original:

俺一人で…勝てるワケねーンだよ

(literal: Me, by myself, there's no way I could win)

Yup, that's basically what I said in that post:

Even with all the amazing panels of Katsuki going ape shit on AFO, it's his character growth and the way he's learned to acknowledge the contributions of others that really shines here.

Also, Mitsuki and Masaru's faces while they watch this happening...I'm crying.

Anyway, I really hope we're getting more OFA vestige stuff when we transition back to Deku v. Shigaraki since Yoichi's just chilling there.

[wyntereyez]

GalaxyCon

I should probably post about GalaxyCon before I forget everything, huh? 

My first day was Saturday and I. Was not prepared. Most of the cons I’ve attended are fandom-specific, and can draw large crowds, but nothing compared to this. According to a news article the next day, there were some 50,000 attendees.

I’d originally only planned to go Saturday, but then Colin’s panel was announced for Sunday, so I got another ticket for then. Saturday was spent beating my way through the crowds (or, more accurate, being beaten) - and getting my photo op with Colin.

It’s been four years since I’d last seen him at Enchanted 2, and damn, he looked amazing. The op was brief, because they do thousands of photos in one day, so I barely had time to do more than say ‘hi’ and ‘thank you.’ He thanked me for coming, and at that point I remembered just how blue his eyes were, and how lovely that Irish brogue is, since it’s currently very thick after being in Ireland for so long. Yup, I still swoon for Colin.

I didn’t get an autograph, but a friend did, and I hung around in line with her until were almost to Colin. His line was so long, it wrapped into the next aisle. I’m not sure the staff anticipated his popularity. And while I was in line, someone told Colin how long his line was, and he gave a little “Yeah!” and put up his arms.

Then we have the Sunday panel. I’m trying to remember as much as I can, but I know I’ll miss things. I’ll put it under a cut, since this is starting to run long.

First of all, kudos to the panel moderator, who helped rephrase questions and guide Colin so he could follow strike rules. That can’t have been easy, so good on GalaxyCon for being prepared and still being able to give us a great panel experience.

Colin was introduced as that actor from That Show, and That Other Show, and That One Movie, etc. At some point, OUAT became ‘The Thing,’ and now I want to embrace that as the show’s alternate title. Also, that would be an awesome crossover.

Anyway... We got a brief introduction, and Colin talked about how hot it was (it had been well over 90 degrees, with a Real Feel of over a hundred, on the day he arrived) and how he’d chosen to wear a suit jacket over his t-shirt and had Regrets.

He apologized for if he was difficult to understand, because he knew how thick his accent was, but someone yelled out they loved it, which he then said was why he brought it up, because he wanted people to say that.

He also said he was doing the panel because he liked having people tell him how great he was, to which the moderator had the entire crowd yell out, “You’re great!”

Then we got to the most bizarre mix of questions I’ve ever heard, and it was wonderful. Things we learned included:

- Colin owns 30 guitars, one of which belonged to Ringo Starr. He has another one that belonged to someone famous, but I can’t remember whom

- If he were a dog breed, he’d be a black Labrador retriever mix

- If he were a comic book superhero (the comic part is very important) he’d want to be Batman. He wanted to be Superman once, but now he wants to be Batman. He earned a blue candy for this, which he promptly put in his mouth with predictable results. Dude, don’t eat candy when you know you’re gonna have questions, LOL.

- Voice acting roles aren’t taboo, so he talked a bit about how different it was to voice Douxie, and how different it was to do dialogue in a booth because he had to be more dynamic rather than speak normally. He also at one point did a bit of Gerry the Leprechaun for us.

- Colin was asked about his feelings on ‘Rise of the Titans.’ He said he enjoyed it, then said he trusted the writers to know what’s best for the characters. I’m not sure if that’s how he really felt, or if he’s just being careful.

- If he were two scoops of ice cream, he’d be pistachio and vanilla - the real vanilla, with the bean.

- He likes pineapple on pizza. He will accept no criticism of this.

- If that one character with the thing on his hand had a dog breed, it would be a black Labrador retriever mix.

- Something he did for The Thing was play INXS’s ‘Need You Tonight’ and did a little strut while wearing the coat. Colin demonstrated. I died.

- When asked what comic villain he would want to be, he said the Joker. This earned him a green candy. He ate it, though he also said he didn’t care for the candy. Colin, why.

- If he could have one mythical creature as a pet, it would be Cerberus. But the heads would be black Labrador retriever mixes. I’m starting to think Colin really loves his dog.

- At one point, Colin said he was having a lot of trouble with this, and that he was worried he’d say the wrong thing. The panel mod assured him that he was doing well. I felt bad for him, because yeah, this can’t have been easy.

- Colin was asked what his most ridiculous phobia is. Colin answered that he fears NOTHING. Except panels.

- When asked if he still talks to people from The Thing, he said a very firm but teasing NO - then proceeded to list a number of people that he does, in fact, talk to.

- Then there’s the beard... at the end of the panel, he said he can’t talk about it, but there’s a reason he has the ‘stupid beard.’ He really doesn’t like it, and it’s kind of hilarious that thanks to the strike, he’s kinda stuck with it for an indeterminate period of time.

And that’s all I remember. If you have more, please add to this post!

[thattimdrakeguy]

Hey, I've been lurking on your posts, definetly agree with a lot of your takes, but one thing that always bother me is your depiction of Tim Drake's skills. Like, making him out to be really weak and downplaying his strengths. That's not saying he's this super awesome dude who can do anything. He was described as not as natural at combat stuff as Dick and Jason, but he worked hard to overcome that and became someone that stands as an equal to them. He wasn't the weakest Robin, he was equal to them because he put in the work. That's what makes him relatable. The talk of forever weak Tim, like Damian saying he could never lose to Tim, and Tim agreeing and using trickery to take the win, it stinks of genetic superiority. Considering Post-Crisis, where he was depicted as pretty buff actually. He was about as big at 13 as Jaso was when he died at 15. It was only after flashpoint that you see talk like this. And I agree, that sometimes fandom exaggerates his intelligence, but his Robin and Red-Robin runs show that he is pretty equal to Bruce and Dick as a detective, that in Gotham he is second only to Barbara in computer work. It's not that Tim's weaker and less skilled than everyone, and it's not that he's so much smarter than everyone either. I'd take 15 year old Tim and put him equal to 15 year old Dick and Jason. I'd put Red Robin as close to an equal to Nightwing, and equal to Red Hood. People do forget he's also won against Red Hood in canon, as well as lost. They've fought a couple of times. So yeah, I don't vibe with Tim being considered the weakest Gotham vigilante, and with 14 year old Damian being considered top 3, with Cass and Bruce. I'd buy it when he's older. Sorry for being long-winded, I was kinda venting. I'd love to hear your opinion. No hate either way, reply to this or not, it's your choice.

That was very difficult to read. So I'm gonna briefly write, what I think is a summarized version of it, and I'll answer what I gathered out of it, and if I'm wrong, I want you to send me another ask so I can answer this right.

"Why do you make out Tim to be really weak? Art depicts something different from what you said. Comics have said he's better in this and that."

Basically, the answer is, the art style in the 90s made everyone really big and buff, look at the Marvel cartoons at the time, most action figures, and it even went for most comics. BUT, the way Tim was written, and shown in his brief time before the 80s and that bit of time when that fad ended shown Tim wasn't meant to look like a steroid abuser.

Tim was constantly talked about as being skinny, and small. Well, skinny in what he seemed like when he had civilian clothes anyways. He was lean.

So, yeah, what he looked like a lot didn't match up.

In the 90s and I'm sure other eras, and art styles. You gotta learn to accept the sensibilities at the time, and not let it trick you into thinking something the intention wasn't.

Also 13-year-old Tim definitely isn't meant to be seen as the same size as 15-year-old Jason.

Here's how they're depicted by the same artist in the same story:

While Jim Aparo does have a same face problem, there's a lot of panels where Tim looks entirely generic, and does make Tim more buff in the costume compare to civilian clothes, which is an inconsistency. Not counting how his sizing of Tim is off compared to how George Perez, the guy to draw the proper first appearance of Tim as we know him. He still makes sure Tim is seen as softer, smaller, and far 'cuter' compared to how he depicts Jason on a regular enough bases, that you can tell what Tim is actually meant to look like, when he's trying harder.

(Ignore the Robin in the upper left corner, that is Dick not Jason.)

Jim Aparo was also the artist for most of Jason's Robin run on Batman (The Jason we know, not the Dick Grayson copy.) Which includes Death of the Family, where he's still depicted as being larger than Tim.

While Jim has a clear love for the ever large, imposing Batman. Jason is still taller than Tim, and has quite the mature look to him.

While a bit inconsistent. Jason is just under Bruce's shoulder. While Tim is basically at Bruce's belly button. And Jason is consistently buff while in costume and not. There was even a panel (that I don't have now, but I did once. I have a large Jason post you may be able to find) that showed Jason working out with bar bells. The intention clearly being that he's meant to be a more of a brawler compared to Dick, and later Tim.

So within the art, and the writing, no, Tim is meant to be quite small, and Jason is meant to be quite large. Jason just wasn't allowed to make Batman seem less imposing when around him, as it'd look silly. Certainly in that ridiculous original Robin costume.

Also I just don't care for Red Robin. I think it just wrote in stuff that felt more like sudden changes to validate a sudden decision, more than it did depict Tim in a new chapter of his existence. Therefore I don't like it, nor do I care for what it says.

Chris Yost is more often than not a great writer.

Red Robin to me, is not one of those comics where he is a great writer.

Lot of great ideas, but more executions I don't think work than anything else.

I don't think all comics are equal.

Canon is very weak even when they tried to maintain it.

So for my sake I go purely off of what I interpret to be the intention, and only care for stories that I personally think do a good job at continuing, and developing narratives that feel in-line with the intention.

Because a writer can write what ever they want as long as the editors, and publisher, and who ever else allows it to be released.

If I were to treat every comic as equal these character's personalities and skills would be so inconsistent you'd have to be a world class mental gymnast champion to bother finding reason for it.

I don't personally bother with it, because why would I? If I don't think a story is well written, then I simply don't think it's well written. I don't get anything out of forcing myself to think I like something I don't.

Also I never said Tim is very weak. I don't think he should be very weak. And if I have said something like that, I likely meant it within a context.

I just like it when writers remember that his way of winning fights, is his wits, not his brawn.

You can be talented, and a winner, without being great at everything. Tim isn't relatable when he's great at everything. Do most people practice so much they become great at everything? No, because that isn't realistic. Not that Batman characters are realistic. It tends to go against Tim's point is all, in my eyes at least.

Tim somehow becoming Dick's equal within 3 and a half years, when Dick has been at it for a decade or more, is insanely hard to believe. Especially when Dick is a natural talent, and Tim is not.

If everyone is depicted as talented in the same exact ways, that is extremely boring to me. So I don't care for it.

Why bring up a character being this, this, and that, to never use it? That's pretty lazy, boring writing to me. So when a writer acknowledges how Tim is supposed to win fights, and actually puts the effort into depicting that, I give it praise, because I think it deserves it.

Also, within the specific example you gave: Damian is a genetically altered super warrior, trained from birth, with (I don't know if this is canon anymore, or was ever much of a thing past one story) enhancements grafted into him.

It's way more interesting to me, to have Damian be able to best Tim at normal combat, 'cause of their immensely different upbringings. Rather than simply saying "Tim is older, so he should win". That's not very clever, or fun to think about.

Although proper power scaling in comics is nonsense as well, in my personal opinion, because really, who ever wins is up to the writer. Any writer can have a character can find a way to beat another character. What makes it well-written or not, is if the writer goes through the effort to make it believable within what's established.

Which is why I liked Zdarsky writing Tim to use his wits to best someone who has far more experience and natural talent in one on one combat. It let's Tim beat someone, he probably shouldn't be able to, in a way that's interesting, and true to character.

However you are entirely free to enjoy buff, Red Robin, as talented as the rest of them Tim. I'm not meaning this as anything in the form of disrespect, or anything like that. You're entirely free to enjoy whatever you want.

All I'm saying is, I don't buy it, and I don't think it SHOULD be how Tim is depicted, because it makes him a lot more generic and typical, when I think he's a lot more interesting when writers follow the intentions of him.

I'm not asking for him to be identical to how he is before he even properly starts being Robin.

I ask for consistency, and writing that cares about maintaining what was the charm, and likability, and uniqueness of a character, even through out their developments, so they don't become lost, or lose their identity, a fate that can infect a lot of characters that get writers without those sensibilities.

'Cause a LOT of stuff is considered canon that doesn't match.

And I'm not one of those people that tries to act like "Oh you can't ignore that just because you don't like it' because everyone does. I've never seen someone say that, and not have some complaint about it. I'm a man of honesty, even in times of disagreements.

All respect to you, though.

I'm mainly hoping this doesn't read like a strongly worded letter. When really I'm casually saying all of this. I'm just insanely Autistic and long winded in my own right.

[basedkikuenjoyer]

Dark out, I’m cloistered inside where it’s warm because I’m built for triple digit temps and we have snow. Perfect circumstances for a little Late-Night Togashiposting! How could I muse on Oda’s relation to such an influence starting from Okiku and not delve into Hunter x Hunter’s biggest sweetiebaby? Introduced here in one of my favorite panels in the entire series. All that buildup about this horrific, otherworldly monster...then boom. Cute little muffin and all her stuffies. Cracks me up everytime. 

Clever introduction too. Symbolically looking like one of the dolls as a reflection of how her family sees her. Excellent contrast with the cutie that perks up when she sees big brother Kil. The idea of “something from afar” as a motif for a trans character given all too often we see Japanese hatemongers writing off queer identities as unsavory Western influence. Not to mention laying seeds for the Dark Continent down the line. Good stuff.

It shouldn’t be hard to guess why I might want to look at Alluka Zoldyck and Okiku side-by-side. We dipped a toe, but they deserve more. They deserve everything. If nothing else we have two high-profile trans characters slipped into some of the biggest ongoing series in Weekly Shonen Jump. They were both very prevalent in their arcs and served as a pillar of the core themes. We have some easy shared territory like exploring them through a sibling bond and this core element of duality. That’s barely scratching the surface though.

First, what we won’t do here. I’m not even going to try and judge which of these two is most baby. They’re both sweetie muffins, they’re both perfect, neither has done a single wrong thing in their lives. I want both as a little sister. Existing in the same series would spark a religion that finally establishes world peace. Eat your heart out Prince Tyson.

The angle I want to approach this from...ever seen much of the correspondence between JRR Tolkien and CS Lewis? It’s honestly as interesting as Narnia or Lord of the Rings. A masterclass on the philosophy of fiction. That’s how I look at these two. Dead serious. And I have for a long time, even before Oda’s glowing statements for Togashi’s exhibition. Looking at the landscape now though, these two are contemporaries even if Togashi’s the senior on paper. Because of his frequent breaks, One Piece has published more chapters than the elder’s three main series combined.

Stands to reason if an author wanted to do a big trans character they’d look at others in the genre. If I was doing so in 2018, Alluka would be a first thought. Hell, Punk Hazard is getting started right as the 13th Chairman Election is concluding. Especially since there’s potentially a similar dynamic getting from Miyuki in Yu Yu Hakusho to Rurouni Kenshin’s Kamatari. The latter pair were part of a big trend of similar characters, WSJ’s answer to a largely shoujo phenomenon. Which tracks with Japanese politics at the time as well as hitting the point new authors who grew up at the height of Stop!! Hibari-Kun’s popularity were coming onto the scene. 

Let’s start somewhere easy for the compare/contrast. Both of these little angels have a core relationship with a big brother we already knew by the time we meet them. I’m not going to say one is better, but I like One Piece’s take more and it plays into a way One Piece distinguishes itself from Shonen contemporaries including HxH. Alluka is wonderful, a great story that makes excellent use of the trans aspect as a parallel to the events going on. Much like we’ve said a lot about Kiku. Still...at the end of the day she’s an accessory to the 2nd most important character in the series. It’s about Killua being a good brother first and foremost. Trying to teach the main audience how to respect someone different. Likewise with the trans aspect just being handed to you up front. For all the ways HxH subverts common tropes, even with Alluka, letting Kiku lead her own story is awesome. Doing in a way that couches her in themes most women could relate to even better. You almost never get that and definitely not in something so mainstream. 

Why? Because it frees her from having to do as many beats about figuring her out. Killua is a nice evolution, being the one who gets his little sister compared to the rest of the family, but Kiku gets to just be her. None of her story is about being alien to begin with. It isn’t really that hard of a concept, getting to One Piece in general. Hunter x Hunter is subversive in many ways, I’d call it the more mature of the two series in terms of content...but it’s still at heart a “coming of age” story. One Piece isn’t. It’s a young man’s odyssey. That’s why we meet Koby in Romance Dawn. Why we don’t spend East Blue bumbling along as an apprentice. To show Luffy is past that kind of motivation and already the type of figure who can inspire others like Shanks did for him.

That same ethos is all over, and for Kiku it ends up being this awesome manifestation. Seriously...how many trans stories have you seen that aren’t about “finding your true self” or something like that? I’d call hers a step that can only happen past that; someone who has done that grappling with the past catching up to you. An adult who has found her own strength tested with regression, the danger of “becoming the mask” again. It’s Yamato and even Sanji who have more common beats you’d see for a trans narrative. Not trying to twist the knife...but that’s why I knew the former wouldn’t be tagging along at the end. Fans ended up telling on him; so much of the appeal was in “seeing him grow.” Great for most Shonen, not so much for One Piece.

Hmm...this is getting pretty long already. Oh darn, guess that means we have more LNTPs to come. I’ll leave you with this fun thought for now. Just consider the timing. Maybe it’s all one big coincidence. But like I said, Punk Hazard starts as Alluka’s arc is wrapping up. We were laying seeds that would matter for Kiku right from meeting Kin’emon. That’s not all though. Just...find it interesting where Togashi’s huge hiatus lines up with One Piece. Last chapter before released concurrently with the beginning of Act 2, Hiatus ends concurrently with Blackbeard showing up again. From one actress with him (Catarina) to another (Pudding). Is it a bit crazy to speculate on two authors collaborating on something funky? Hell yes, massive reach. But if any two would...

[the-firebird69]

Another special projects that our son and daughter have maybe something like this to build it from scratch and it would be a stitch frame project and it would be a steel frame with metal panels and this is the vehicle that you would want to try to do that with. And you would need a roll cage to meet dot standard and it would be a full cage he says the front and the back not the rear but you see it on some Jeeps and it would look cool it would be awesome and he thinks that we should design it and sell it and see if people can do it and I think it's a good idea so we're going to have our engineers handed hand in designs for the stitch Jeep and he wants people to hand them in to Frank Castle hardcastle this week and he's going to do with me he's going to do one and he hasn't done he has it done already judging will be Friday this coming week and it won't be that hard to get it together but judging will be based on simplicity it has to be constructible the stitch part will be the body the frame has to be built together and welded or the dot will not approve unless it is welded frame so it's based on constructibility and availability of materials the tires and rims are not hard to get and things like seats and stuff and we put it in a magazine where they can get those things and we realize that the parts are key to the whole thing and we have to list where and that's what the contest is including the engine and it would be not a kit car but the ground up she's something else

Items we have to report

-we have a lot of stuff happening and it's really getting very hectic you know too many pans in the fire and we need to have more people on board.

-part of that is going to be us doing recruiting of course and people finding out there is a war on and we have to slowly announce it I guess he says yeah if they don't if they're not told you guys are in a lot of trouble and we have been telling them. So you don't have to worry but we do have to tell them a little more.

-we have about 10 minutes to say no we have a good amount of time before to explain things I would like to get to other items but we have some time. One thing we want to express is we need to get things organized here the place is a mess we need to get him a better place to stay better food and we need to start and the program is beginning and we can do things extra that's going to happen it's not going to be based entirely on daves life. We also really need to clean up the ACT here it's a little loose

-there are other things to consider but we need to do that where the state of war but we need to make some announcements

-the pseudo empire has been advancing today and not telling anybody it's true they really had to this morning was vulgar again. And Dave drove the Toyota up to the laundromat in a different persona and he had painted the Toyota in space let's put f****** wrong with you our son asked in space and the guys started smiling and gesturing and saying all the stuff he finally said I think you have to do it for myself and others and then you said who's the Toyota supposed to represent and he goes we think it's your people and our son says I think it's my actual people and you're saying it's you guys and you're not the white ones and he says oh yeah it makes sense so it did mean to us and it's the max so you got b******* again and her son says don't shoot the messenger again and he started laughing and said it wasn't us and the same group so he told Tommy f he goes what would you tell me for. And it was funny but he said the Japanese and them as long history of symbolism and they're saying that they're a white 4x4 in the engine needs some work and turned into some sort of military application and they got a little chunkier and beefier and it has females aboard and they're saying that they'd be around and it is because of the missiles and things like that and all of a sudden they start getting a little nervous and I said what is going to happen here so what we know is they hit top side and it rains and the water goes down into the aquifer and they're aquifer by the way and they die. There's a few other things going on but that's one of them we do know that they're fighting over the silos and it's bja and Trump and the max are doing it secretly some foreigners in US that's going to be a terror even but it's going to be an event of terror but it'll work and it's one thing bothering everybody but it started out with the pseudo empire advancing and we're talking about the Japanese thing but they're coming in and we think they're talking about them and they are attacking people and taking them down and they are not relenting and it's a nightmare.

-Tampa and Orlando even Sarasota are kind of the same they have similar numbers surround 10% more lock and 35% pseudo empire and they've been fighting and it's been changing this encouraged the morlock and tonight they're going to go up there and they've been coming out of the Midwest tons of them pouring out

-and there's some other factors one of them is that the area of fort Myers is around 35% more lock and 30% pseudo empire and yeah has been pouring in but the warlock poured in all night and all morning and it's a tough war and Miami is 20% MC warlock and 30% pseudo empire and 10% minority more luck and it's kind of the way it was but really Charlotte county is 45% back morlock and it is growing. 20% pseudo empire

-they're evacuating the Midwest and a lot of them come down this way they want to see what's going on and trying to help out and they are it's a huge group and they're sending people in all the time and they managed to get here and also losing their hardware and attempt to go behind the Sun they lost $500 billion today out of 2.3 trillion and they are forming up another group of 500 billion. They're trying to get ships out but will not match the pseudo empire even with those and that's kind of who they're facing and they don't have ground bases and they're going to try and get those tonight in the Western hemisphere which is a change they are starting their approach on those early and they're trying to get in position as we speak they're moving out and it is the huge number of troops true that's a massive massive number and they are going to try and better take the laser bases are going after and there's several of them in the west that are fairly good sized they're very big and they are impressive it was saying that because the laser power is yes impressive and it is quite interesting that it is this powerful they're going to try and dominate the whole scene and see if they can do it is pretty scary for a lot of people they don't like it. Our son doesn't like it but he can't do anything about it they are going to March shortly it is going to be a huge amount of people flowing in to these areas with the laser bases are they're not going to be going after the regular areas and they're not seeking their areas of operation as much as they are the laser basis and they need them and they recognize that and they're starting to think in more realistic terms it is about damn time they are stuck up there ass their heads are way up there. Now these things are going to happen momentarily all right so we are informing the public of it and they are evacuating the Midwest they are currently working their way up 25% of north of the Southern Kentucky border across the whole Midwest as they roll up there and they're sneaking up they're trying to take stuff from factories and the pseudo empire and us mostly were trying to stop him because they're just going to squander it or lose it and it's not their place to do that to society so we are stopping them it was a panic and it happened yesterday and it carried through a little to today and a big bunch of them left about 20% of the entire Midwest that was left and that has not happened yet again as the buzzwords are going around it happened yesterday we expect them to blow out to flow out possibly another 20%. That's an enormous number of people is gigantic and it's going to be a massive Exodus there's really not going to be much of a way around that happening if the panic and it will panic see we're up about 75% of Kansas that's only about 50 miles from the wall and we cordoned off all the factories if they try we hit them with heavy fire and more and they can't stand it we see it building up I'm getting the fresh report now and they say the 10% are getting ready to leave now they say this kind of thing all the time but really they're thinning out from where we are all the way to the wall and half of the entire upper Midwest this time and we are occupying a bunch of factories up there and the pseudo empire and it's to control the situation and to keep consumer goods going we need an economy and realistically these people have become the enemy and they are working for the empire by accident and unfortunately it can't be tolerated and what this is they should have relocated factories and yeah probably it's kind of a stupid thing to do so it's going on out there now and it's very huge and it is growing and we'll have more in a moment

Thor Freya

Olympus

Zues

These people are a bunch of jerks and they mess with them possibly and you're not getting it in their horrible

Hera

[gurleend287]

SwampCon

SwampCon is the first convention I have ever been to. Safe to say that I enjoyed it very much. Everything from the hundreds of cosplay artists to the cute maid café was a new experience for me.

I only ever view cosplay artists on social media platforms such as Instagram and YouTube. However, seeing them in front of me in person was AWESOME. I recognized so many of the characters that walked by me, such as ones from Blue Lock, Spy X Family, AOT, etc.. As a closeted weeb, who doesn’t like physically displaying any of my interests in anime outside, it was cool to see how this is a safe space for individuals to express themselves. Even one of my own friends cosplayed as a character from Genshin: Scaramouche (pictured right in the middle of the above photo).

As for what we did throughout the day on Saturday: I met up with everyone outside the Reitz in the morning to take some photos for my friend’s cosplay. After registration, we then went on upstairs to the third floor where the Maid Café was. One of my mentors was serving as a maid too, so I was really excited to see her outfit. Everyone looked SO CUTE. It was actually really fun, and I was surprised to see that they had vegan brownies as an option since I don’t eat eggs due to personal dietary restrictions. Several of the servers also performed during our show, which was super cool. I started screaming internally when I recognized the kpop song they were dancing to: Go Go by BTS.

We then went on the other side of the floor to the two rooms known as Artist Alley. I loved loved loved all the beautiful works of art in there. From keychains, stickers, and buttons to quite expensive prints, everything was extremely colorful. I literally felt like a little child going into a candy store when I walked in. This one artist in particular caught my eye because his prints were absolutely breathtaking: Kawaii Satori (the name on his business card). He had AMAZING prints of all the anime I loved, but I had to hold myself back and not purchase the prints because I have too many up on my walls at home anyways (but that’s why you take the business card, so you can buy them online later haha). There was this other artist, Lalaine Garcia, I fell in love with too. Her keychains were so cute (my favorite was this Gojo one). But I took her card instead of purchasing the keychains because I wanted to look around the vendor hall too before buying anything. (I’m so proud of myself for not spending over $20 total though the entire day).

The vendor hall was next (also on the same floor). I actually wasn’t too interested in most of the stalls there except this one that sold jewelry, notably cute earrings, which was located right in front of the door that led inside. I did buy some Rengoku earrings from there :) because they were small enough to not be out there, but I was also showing off how much I LOVE demon slayer.

Overall, Saturday was super fun with my friends because we spent most of the day taking photos, admiring art, and joking around about what we saw.

On Sunday, I volunteered for three hours at the info desk outside the Grand Ballroom. It was a much more relaxed day since I just had to pass out shirts and point people into the direction of different panels and events that they were lost on. And then got some perks at the end of my shift, which included stickers, a cup, and a shirt.

P.S. the art on the badge was so pretty, I wanna know who made it

[sarahjtv]

BNHA Chapter 362 Spoilers

It’s been a hot year since I last posted my spoiler thoughts on My Hero Academia, but I need to talk about Chapter 362 because holy shit.  Buckle up, ‘cause this is LONG:

I was screaming and internally crying all night last night when I read the summary of this chapter.  Bakugo is probably dead.  The second main protagonist of this story might be dead.  This is probably the most shocking thing I’ve seen in MHA since Deku left UA and Bakugo apologized.  Like, I was flabbergasted.

I am still devastated, but I have to give props to Horikoshi for having the titanium balls to even do this.  He’s killed off characters in this story before, but this is truly something else.  Nighteye, for example, was so, so sad.  I cried for his death.  Bakugo’s death absolutely stunned me because I never thought Horikoshi would do this. 

Also, Horikoshi is a sadistic evil genius for making this the last chapter before holiday break in Japan next week.  So basically, Shonen Jump’s on break and we’re not getting chapters of a lot of manga for 2 whole weeks including MHA.  Horikoshi straight up left us on Bakugo’s possible death for 2 fucking weeks. 

I also wonder how long Horikoshi has been planning this because you know he loves playing the long game.

So, Katsuki Bakugo.  Yeah, he looks pretty dead in that last panel.  I don’t think he’s perma-dead personally.  There’s still some of his quirk going on in his left eye and I doubt Horikoshi would really kill off one of, if not the, best character in his series permanently.  Horikoshi also said that Bakugo would have a BIG moment in this final arc and that really hasn’t happen yet.  Yeah, that massive cluster was awesome, but it lasted not even half a chapter.  Bakugo still has a bigger role to play.

I gotta say, though, putting in that flashback of when Bakugo and Deku got those All Might trading cards and revealing that Bakugo’s been carrying his in his pocket the entire series breaks my heart into a million pieces.  He really does idolize All Might and him looking up to his vestige only solidifies that.  God, that genuine smile though.  I’m ruined, guys.

Also Bakugo still thinking of how he’s going to match IZUKU while on Death’s Door is both so sweet and so devastating.

Now, what’s going to happen to Bakugo from here.  Honestly, I don’t know.  Again, I don’t think he’s going to die forever, but there’s a few things that could happen:

Eri: We don’t know where she is now, but they could bring her back to Rewind Bakugo’s body to before it got crushed by Shigi/AFO.  We don’t know if her Quirk works on dead body’s though. 

 Bakugo Stays Dead: This would make the manga as a whole so much more somber, but Deku’s reaction would make him lose his shit.  I can see him being so sad and angry that he absolutely wrecks so many people without a hint of rational thinking.  I don’t like seeing my green son hurt, but it would be really good storytelling and character development if it did happen. 

Bakugo is in Limbo and his Spirit is in The Vestige World: This is what I think is happening right now.  It’s really, really interesting that Bakugo saw All Might’s vestige before he died.  Before, the only living person who witnessed this was Deku.  So, why Bakugo? 

Connection with OFA: Bakugo did have OFA in the 2nd movie, albeit briefly.  I think the 2nd movie is canon, but it’s only been hinted at in the main manga with Nine having a brief appearance.  Similar to how Melissa from the 1st movie is hinted at with her inventions being in the main manga.  If the 2nd movie is canon, then it would be possible that Bakugo would still have hints OFA still in him and that could bring him to the vestige world.  I can’t imagine what it’d be like if Deku found out about Bakugo’s death like THIS.

Relation to the 2nd OFA User: AFO said that Bakugo remind him of the 2nd User.  We also had a panel in a previous chapter that compared the two as well.  My theory of Bakugo being a decedent of the 2nd User is becoming more true, I think.  This would give Bakugo more of a connection to OFA, the Vestige World, and the 2nd User’s Quirk maybe.  Maybe that Quirk could bring him to life. 

Bottom line: I think Bakugo is dead for now, but he’ll be back.  Not sure how or when, but he has to come back.  Horikoshi knows that Bakugo is too important of a character to be killed off for pure shock value.  Katsuki Bakugo is not done yet.

[melancholyshadow]

sunday’s with a solider || b. barnes

part one 

summary: after a good date with bucky, (y/n) figures out who she’s really getting involved with. 

pairing: bucky barnes x female!librarian!reader 

warnings: kissing (??), swearing

an: im honestly speechless, the first part of this series has 150+ notes! i’m so happy you guys liked it! i’m debating on make this a three or a four-part series, please let me know what you think, but there will definitely be at least another part. one of the next, or the next, will include some spice, if you know what i mean. and who do y’all want me to write about next? im thinking mr. steve rogers. 

tags: @biixlv​

“Please tell me you’re a booth person and not a table person.” You chuckled, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Uh, yeah.” He laughed and rolled his eyes at you. He began walking towards one of the booths. You followed happily behind him, scooting into the opposite side of the booth. He pulled off his hat and both his gloves, setting them on the seat next to him. You propped your head on the palm of your hands, stopping yourself from looking at his metal hand, you weren’t even sure if it was metal.

The diner was one that had been in this town for, at least, forty years, and it definitely showed its age. It was trying to be a ‘retro diner’ in the eighties, so that aged it another thirty years. You grew up coming here with your family, the food was good, and you thought the inside was cute. The building was longer than it was wide, and the floor reminded you of a checkerboard. There was a long bar on the left, space for waiters to maneuver, and a long panel of metal enclosing the kitchen portion. Bright red bar stools were implemented into the floor, screwed into the floor, every two feet or so. On the right, were five or six booths, the same shade of red as the bar stools, big enough for about four people max. 

“Hey, sugar!” A familiar voice chirped to your left. Your eyes met a familiar pair of green ones, and a smile immediately filled your face. “Hey, Mabel!” You cooed, half-standing under the table and wrapping your arms around her small, fragile frame. She smelled like coffee and smoke, as she always did. The two of you pulled away, and her eyes instantly went to Bucky. “Who's your friend?” She asked, raising her eyebrows at you. “Mabel, this is my friend James. James, this is Mabel.” You explained, quickly introducing the two. He smiled at her and stuck out his ‘normal’ hand to give her a handshake, which she was very fond of. 

“Well, it is great to meet you, James! What can I get you to drink?” She had abandoned her notepad well before you were born, her ability to just remember someone’s order still amazed you. “Coffee please, no sugar or creamer please.” She smiled at him, and turned back towards me, “Regular for you, dear?” She asked, and you smiled, scrunching up your eyes and nose. She practically pranced away with a huge smile on her face. Bucky chuckled, pulling you from your thoughts, turning your head back towards him. His eyes were scanning over the faded laminated menu.

“How do you know Mabel?” He asked, looking up and unzipping his jacket, pulling it off his abdomen and onto the seat beside him, with his gloves and hat. “I grew up coming here with my family, she’s known me since I was in my mother’s stomach.” You explained, pointing to a picture above the bar. It was pretty faded after sitting in direct sunlight for over two decades, but it was a picture of Mabel, your mom, your dad, and you, you all had on party hats. “I had my first ten birthdays at this diner.” Bucky squinted his eyes and smiled once he made out the picture of baby you. 

“That’s awesome.” He said looking back at you. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Mabel cut him off. “Here is that coffee, Mr. James.” She slid the coffee in front of him, “And a regular for you, (Y/M/N).” She wiped her hands on her apron, “What can I get you two to eat?” Bucky looked at me, wanting me to order first. “We’ll both take the ‘67.” You smiled. She copied, “You got it, dearie.” And she walked away. Bucky cleared his throat, “Just trust me, Bucky,” You chuckled, placing your hands on top of his, “You’re gonna love it.” He paused for a moment, “I’ll hold you to that.” He winked at you. Did he just wink at you? Was he flirting? You immediately shot back at a wink and a flirty response, “Deal.”

The two of you ate and chatted for about an hour and a half. “Okay, you were right, that was the best food I’ve ever had.” He said, stacking your plates and utensils together, making it easier for Mabel when she took them off the table. “Can I get you two anything else?” She asked, picking up the two plates with ease. Bucky looked at you and you nodded a ‘no,’ and he looked back at Mabel, “No thank you, ma’am, but I will take the check.” He smiled. 

“No, Mabel, split the check pl-” But Mabel cut you off, “Sorry, dear, my hearing aid died, I can’t quite hear you. I’ll bring that check right to you, Mr. James.” Quickly walking away. “Bucky, no, I will pay for mine.” You insisted, going to reach for your purse. You looked around you in your seat in a panic, and then you remembered, it was in the saddlebag attached to his bike. He laughed at you as you came to that realization. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?” You sighed, taking a sip of your drink. He simply shrugged and smiled, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket. 

Once Mabel returned with the bill and Bucky’s card, the two of you stood, and he let you walk out first. It was a lot colder now, goosebumps layered your exposed arms, like a reflex you wrapped your arms around yourself. “Here, you take this.” He insisted, placing his heavy leather jacket on your shoulders. “No, I can't, you're gonna get cold too.” You began to shrug it off, but he placed his hands on your shoulders, stopping you. “I’ll be fine.” He smirked at you, his hands lingering for a little longer than normal. 

“Ready?” He asked as he straddled his bike, once more. You stuck your arms through the long sleeves, which went way past your fingertips. You took your seat behind him, and he handed you the helmet, and you slid it over your head. Similar to earlier, you snaked your arms around him, clasping your hands together, and resting around his mid-abdomen. His hands, once again, landed on your thighs, pulling you even closer to him, making a different type of goosebumps cover your arms. 

“Hang on tight, doll.” He said as the bike came to life. You were so glad you were wearing a helmet, so he couldn’t see the brush creep onto your cheeks. As you two rode, he used his prosthetic hand to steer the bike and kept his flesh hand on your knee the entire time. The sky had ditched the orange, pink, and red hues and was now littered in stars and moonlight. You didn’t want this to end, you felt like you could stay there for hours, but the library came into view a lot sooner than you wanted it to. 

The next day came and you got excited, as always, to see Bucky. Today was a little different though, after your date last night. Wait, was that even a date? It had to be, right? I mean he paid and flirted with you. 

“Bucky, why do you come in here every day?” You asked, peering at him over the book in your hands. He didn’t move for a second, you assumed he was finishing the sentence he was reading. “Well, all the libraries in New York City are crowded and noisy.” He explained, “So when I found this place while scoping out new libraries, even though it is quite a distance, I knew this place was it for me.” He smiled at you. “At least that was the reason initially.” He muttered, picking his book back up. 

“And what is that supposed to mean?” You set your book down this time, squinting your eyes at him, and propping your head up on your hands. “Well obviously, I now come back because the shitty coffee you offer is to die for.” He said sarcastically. You gasped and threw one of your pens at him, bouncing off his chest and onto the floor. He broke out into a fit of laughter, and you soon followed. 

“No, but now I come back to hang out with you.” He admitted to you, avoiding your stare. “Oh that so sweet…” You started, “...Dork.” Throwing another pen at him, this time hitting the bill of his hat. Bucky had come in every day for a little over a month now and missed not a single Sunday. “Hey (Y/F/N)?” Bucky asked, looking back up from his book. Your eyes didn’t leave the pages of your book, but you answered, “Yes, Buck?” You asked back, flipping the page. 

“I won’t be here tomorrow, and for a couple days after that.” When the words left his lips, a wave of sadness washed over you. Your lips twisted into a pout, looking towards him. “Why?” You asked, dragging out the word. “I have some obligations.” You rolled your eyes at him, “Okay, Mr. Mysterious.” You scoffed, feeling a bit upset. How long had he known? Why was he just now telling you? “I’m gonna be so bored without you.” You whined, leaning back in your chair with a huff. 

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” 

It was closing time now, and as usual, Bucky walked you to your car. “You better bring me a souvenir from wherever you’re going.” You joked, tossing your purse into the passenger seat, and turning back towards Bucky. “Would you prefer a T-shirt? Maybe some socks? How about a shot glass?” He joked back, leaning against the side of your car. “Surprise me.” You laughed, pushing his chest. 

As you went to pull away from his chest, his flesh hand wrapped around your wrist, softly. He placed it back on his chest, and his metal hand went to your hip, pulling you closer to him. The only distance between both of your chest was being occupied by your hand. You swore up and down that he could hear your heartbeat, but you were soon reassured because you could feel his heartbeat racing just as much as yours was. Bucky glanced down at your lips, and you did the same. 

You closed the space between your lips, and without thinking your eyes fluttered closed, taking in everything happening over your entire body. His lips were soft, tasting like coffee and mint. The growing stubble on his chin rubbed against the softness of your cheeks. His flesh hand was warm around your wrist, gripping it softly, he never wanted to hurt you. But the gestures with his metal hand were very different. It was leaving a cool tingling sensation against the small patch of exposed skin, and his grip was tighter, pushing you impossibly closer to him. You took your free hand, and placed it on his face, thumb running over his cheek, and your other four fingers resting on his neck. 

After what feels like minutes, but was probably only about thirty seconds, you pulled away from him. Reluctantly, of course. The two of you just stood there, not moving, relishing at the moment for as long as you could. “You know I meant to surprise me souvenir-wise, right?” You chuckled, messing with the hair on the nape of his neck. “Oh okay, we can just never do that again.” He sighed, messing with you. 

“No, no, we can definitely do that again.”

~

It was the first Sunday without Bucky in a while, he had been gone for almost a week now, you assumed working on his ‘obligations.’ You had been keeping yourself busy with a new book series, one that Bucky actually recommended to you. But today would be full of dusting, reorganizing, putting away some newer books, and vacuuming. It was probably around 3:30 in the afternoon, and you were dusting the large bay windows by the front of the store. 

You could feel the music moving through your body, making it impossible for you not to dance, at least just a little wiggle. You swayed your hips, the music taking over, singing into the duster like a microphone. Your free hand ran up the side of your body, from your thigh all the way up to your face. You threw your arm up over your head, and prancing around the tables, shifting the duster from a microphone to an electric guitar. When the song was finally over, and you were very much out of breath, you made your way back to the window. And when you did so, your heart dropped to your toes. There was a man standing on the opposite side of the window, watching you. 

It only took a few seconds for your fear to turn into relief. It was Bucky. You dashed to the left towards the door, unlocking the door, and running out to greet him. Practically leaping towards him, you wrapped both arms around his neck, and his arms snaked around your waist. After a few moments of swaying and just taking in his presence, you pulled away. He was smiling widely, “I didn’t mean to end your concert so soon, I was enjoying it.” Adding a chuckle. Your face blushed, and you put your hand over your eyes, peeking at him through your middle and ring finger, “Did you see the whole thing?” You asked, dreading his answer. “The whole thing.”

The two of you walked back inside, the music still playing loudly. There was a slow song playing, and you grabbed your phone to turn it down, but Bucky stopped you. “Wanna dance?” He asked, putting his hand out for you to grab. You smiled, happily taking it. He pulled your chest against his. Your arms rest on his shoulders, your fingers loosely interlocked. Both hands on your hips, both of you just rocking side to side. The music wasn’t even registering in your brain, you were just focusing on this moment with him. 

“I remember when this song came out.” He said softly. You cocked your eyebrow at him, “Didn’t this song come out in the fifties?” You asked confused, what did he mean by that? “So you really don’t know who I am, huh?” The question caught you off-guard, it sounded very egotistical. “No..?” You asked more like a question. And that’s when he explained everything, making a very long story very short. He explained the arm, the serum, and the ‘obligations.’ 

“You’re a fucking Avenger?” You asked, head in your hands, elbows on your knee. “Well, technically I’ve never been asked to be one, but kind of.” His hand on your back, rubbing it in small circles. “So you’re the James Buchanan Barnes from the Captain America museum?” He nodded. Everything kind of flooded back to your memory, you knew you heard the nickname “Bucky” before, and you knew he looked somewhat familiar, but you assumed he just looked kinda similar to an actor or something. 

It was silent for a good five minutes, but Bucky broke it. “Hey, guess what?” He asked, trying to hide the upturn of his lips. What now? Was he gonna break some more news to you? Was he also part alien? “Hmm?” That was all you said, running your fingers through your hair. He moved his hand to reach into his backpack and pulled out a book, sliding it towards you. 

“Russian Urban Legends.” You read the title, quickly flipping through the book with your thumb. “Flip to page 48, and tell me what it says.” He said, propping his head upon his hands. You did as he said and landed on page forty-eight. “The Winter Soldier.” You read the words written in a bright red font, the page decorated in grainy photos and ridiculously cheesy government lettering and drawings. Bucky looked at you, prompting you to continue. 

“A ghost story or a real threat?”

[autoplaysdigimon]

So, let’s talk comics again.

Previously, I showed off the transition between seasons 1 and 2, and how it cut off about three quarters of 01 content. 

(Also, since that cover was scanned, it has come apart from the rest of the book, and now I have two halves of cover for this comic. Alas.)

The comic series for 02 must have been handled by different people, because it’s ever so slightly different to the anime. But, uh, the quality is about the same as before.

This is a cute detail to include, even if the scene that this is from didn’t appear in the comic. You can see that it’s the actual photo that was taken, with everyone staring at the egg! How nice.

TK, Kari and, weirdly, Izzy are missing from this. I’d chalk it up to all three of them showing up in this story, but Tai does too, so who fuckin knows.

This is their first appearance, no scene of TK and Davis or anything. Of note is that Kari doesn’t insult Davis, maybe he’s less of a douche in this version. Also: “football”, not soccer. Different markets, I suppose, but I know that we call it soccer here in New Zealand, so????

“YOUR BROTHER IS AWESOME AND I WANNA BE HIM”

Davis Motomiya: Disaster Bi.

Oooo, an almost swear? “Oh my God” seems a bit risky for a kid’s comic.

This art style is adorable! Much better than the 01 version, even though they appear in the SAME COMIC.

BELIEVEABLE DIALOGUE. Although hey, there’s a “damn” there! They must have had their big boy pants on for this translation or something?

I really like “UH OH” as a sound effect.

(...ignore that spot above Kari’s dialogue there, it doesn’t seem to be on the actual comic so it must have been a scanning oopsie.)

Here’s these guys’ introduction! Why is Cody there? Who knows!

Also I was wrong, this mention of Izzy is his only “appearance” in this one, so why didn’t he get to be in the age-up panel up there? How rude.

(He appears in the next one, so they weren’t going for any “ooo what does IZZY look like!” suspense kinda thing. They were just bullying the poor kid.)

Hey look, a panel from the show! I don’t think that one actually shows up in this episode, though, weirdly.

Yolei why are you reading someone else’s email? Rude.

The dialogue immediately before this is Kari saying “Not all of us can go!” and then this happens, immediately proving her wrong. This version of the story just utterly blitzes through the plot points, doesn’t it? No hesitation, just action. It kinda takes the charm out of it a bit?

Not entirely,

but a little bit.

Now, I say that, and then I have to present to you my absolute favourite panel from this mess.

...I

I’m so glad I took a break between the last comic and this, in retrospect, because it means that I got to have the last avatar up for a while before I changed it to this. IT’S TOO PERFECT I LOVE IT

The egg is just on a fucking path, I guess. Why not?!

...

Well, that’s another strong contender.

Davis inherently understanding this all notwithstanding, this sequence never fails to crack me up. What was your thought process here, Davis? Why the sassy? Why did fear not happen? Who are you???

Now, you may have noticed some sequence breaking here - by this point in the episode, we should have our little blue friend by now. This is the biggest difference between the two versions.

In the anime, they discuss the egg a bit, try to lift it, and Davis succeeds. Veemon is born, they throw around some introductions, and then Monochromon shows up and ruins their day. 

In this version...

...this happens, somehow.

I don’t understand

THERE HE IS I LOVE HIM

...and then his birthday is IMMEDIATELY RUINED.

HOW IS THIS THE FUNNIEST THING EVER

I just... I don’t know what to say that could add to this situation. This is the funniest damn thing to ever happen and there’s nothing that I can say that could make it funnier. Between every expression that Davis makes, the fact that they forget that they’re in mortal peril because a little blue man appeared, poor Veemon’s triumphant debut being interrupted and losing all of his momentum, the fact that you can hear the nonexistant music grind to a halt for this one moment, and the fact that even the Digimon Emperor and Monochromon are given pause... fucking hell this is my favourite moment.

“im 12 seconds old and what is this”

dshgkjhdjl Veemon you absolute fuckup. Never change.

There’s a minor plot hole in the dub, where Davis shouts “Digi-Armour Energise” without knowing that phrase, the second episode confirming that they have to shout that and Davis didn’t just make it up. In the original version, Veemon tells him to shout it, but his line was changed for the dub. Interestingly enough:

It’s preserved in this version! Along with the basics of the line that they changed it to in the dub! Weird. Were they going off the original script, or was there someone on the writing team who noticed that?

The fight goes slightly differently, but the basics are the same.

This panel is cool as fuck, tho.

You know what? I am ready for a new adventure. Let’s do it.

(Does Davis have a tear in his eye there? CUTE)

[wisehq]

Mission Debrief: Chapter Forty-Seven

...Right through the goddamn door!

Annnnnnddddd turns out it was option 2 behind the door. Endo went the cliche route and had the ol’ “bad guy disguised as room server” schitck, but considering we got a wicked assassination from Yor out of it I’m definitely not complaining (guess it was a good thing it wasn’t Loid and Anya!) This was probably the most action packed chapter since Loid took on Edgar’s men way back in the first chapter, and I am living for it. So let’s talk about it!

(Also just a quick shout out to @tare-chan​ and @musiciati​ for their awesome analyses. Check them out if you haven’t already!)

Okay, like I said already, the room service guy. It’s cliche. It’s obvious. It’s overdone- but I think that was kind of the point. The moment we saw this guy we already knew what was gonna happen, and yet it was still exciting seeing everyone pop off and Yor impaling the guy with her dagger (with a little help from McMahon and his darts, of course.) It quickly becomes apparent that plot isn’t the main focus of this chapter- rather it’s the action. We’ve had exposition. We’ve had buildup. The last three chapters were mostly talking, and now we’re getting into the actual fun part of this arc.

Endo has been building Yor up this whole time, and now we’re finally seeing everything come to a head as if the manga were this big, blockbuster summer movie about an army of assassins out for blood on a cruise liner. We’ve got all the tropes; an evil man-behind-the-chair, the eclectic group of cutthroat criminals, and a well-composed leader to reign them all in...

...For the most part.

The kill count is climbing fast, which I suppose is to be expected when you’re in Yor’s line of work. Still, it’s interesting- and a little bit concerning- how readily these guys are willing to turn on each other. We see that more as the chapter progresses and things devolve into essentially chaos. Everyone knows that Olka and Yor know they’re being targeted, so it becomes a rat race to see who can kill the former first.

Queue the masquerade scene (which funnily enough a lot of people were hoping would happen at some point, though not quite in this way). Yor is perfection in this whole sequence. Her assassin instincts are on full display, able to recognize the subtle feeling of killing intent even among an entire ballroom full of people. She has her eyes on everyone in there, including her charges, and despite her being nervous she invariably has everything under control.

First taking out a hitman with a button from across the room, and then leading a man twice her size out on the dance floor. I just have to reiterate that everything about this was so slick and smooth. Yor’s killer accuracy. The ease she takes this man with her insane strength. That little bit at the end where she reveals she’s married and tells him “it isn’t right”- god, move over Twilight. Your wife is the real smooth one in the family xD

Speaking of, it was only a matter of time before Anya got involved. It was kind of obvious that she’d be the first one to be clued in on Yor’s work, since she already knew the set-up for everything anyway. Now Anya knows the true extent of the trouble she’s in, even more so since we as the reader now know how much money is actually on the line here. Pulling out the math we did to figure out the cost of Handler’s coat, we know that Dalc= 3.16 to the U.S dollar. That means the combined bounty for both Olka and her son comes out to $2,528,000- an amount sizeable enough to make a boat full of eager assassins do anything to obtain.

Luckily- as expected- Loid is no slouch in keeping tabs on the boat-goers. Of course he’s not privy to the potential slaughter happening on in the background, but he does immediately recognize all the wires and bugs hidden everywhere on the ship. I’m glad Endo pointed this out because a) I knew Loid would sniff them out eventually and b) It gives Loid the excuse as to why he won’t draw attention to himself through out all this. Evil-franky (the intelligence guy) is listening to everything going on in the ship. If he hears any little detail that might point him to Yor and Olka, he’ll seize it...though good luck getting anything out of Loid when he’s on his best behavior. He won’t accidentally let anything slip out now that he knows people are listening, allowing him and Anya (and by extension Yor) some degree of anonymity-

-Assuming Loid can figure his daughter out. Poor guy just can’t catch a break, especially when Anya has no idea how to help her mama out. I know people were feeling bad that Anya has this recurring fear of Loid leaving her and Yor (frog hater), but honestly I was too busy laughing to care. Also I just have to appreciate Loid trying to be a good dad (FoR dA mISsuN.) Let him worry about that while his wife takes on an army. Y’know, typical Forger stuff.

It’s gonna be a whole month before the next chapter, but that doesn’t mean a lack of SxF! Endo’s been leaking out panels from his new novel and it’s looking fantastic. Also we’ve been seeing a lot more fan artists and writers popping up lately, so kudos to them for keeping us sated until chapter 48 drops! Ya’ll are the best!

Also, BONUS

BEBE BIRB

[namjoonchronicles]

closure |nj

↳ pairing namjoon, reader

↳ genre fluff, domestic, established relationship, melodrama

↳ words 3,775k

↳ summary some stories aren't meant to be understood, they're just written to be heard.

↳ warning depression; major death of side character, suicide

↳ song 'feel something' by clairo, 'to love someone else' by avery lynch, 'chernobyl' by alec bailey

Truly, the nights are filled with unspoken stories. When he took your hand in his and looked deep into your eye with those soft concerned gaze, you were home. He cupped your chin, curled a strand of your hair behind your ear and studied your entire face.

“What’s that look?” his voice swam in your semi-consciousness, “I know that look. That look pains me, takes me to the edge, makes me curl my toes, that look…”

Your eyes flutter wondrously at his lashes, his Cupid’s bow and supple lips, along with a stricken smile you asked him quizzically, “I am alright, you have nothing to worry about…”

Namjoon thumbed your cheek and it traced down to your smile line, the curve at the edge of your lips, and you know he felt the trembles as you forced the smile. Namjoon’s eyes trail up to meet yours again, he starts chewing the insides of his cheek, hollowing them.

“You are faking the smile,” and he softens when he sees your eyes gleaming with tears. Upon this, he collected your head into his arms and cushioned by his chest. He passes a long lingering kiss atop of your head, cradling your head while your arms are low on his hip, trying to barely hold on. At the time, he felt like a pillar, holding you together in all your ruins. His stature, the scent of his aftershave, the makings of his shirts and the smell of his skin— it all rushed over your senses like a tsunami. The kind of comfort he was, such a calming presence for a cyclone-bearing human you were.

Rush of emotions. It builds up.

And up.

And up.

And overflows.

You are an enigma Namjoon is scrambling to find out. A tough shell of a crab, with walls built high and thick. Like a lost traveler with a single map that’s ever changing in its path, ever evolving��� you were that map. The verandah's wooden panel wet from the late afternoon rain, the hammock under the small roof at the edge, lay static in its place until Namjoon put his enormous weight on it. One leg dangling out, arm spread and waiting for you to grab them. He bracketed your waist and lifted you from the floor and into his lap like a child. He has a bottle of soda by the side, its lid snapped open. Laying your back on his hard, defined pectoral chest, feeling the weight of the world on your shoulder somewhat lifted a bit. Namjoon knows, and he knows this without you saying a word— he knows that you had been fighting many battles alone, and with yourself. The battles had wrung you out, strewn you in and silenced you. Constantly, insistently the world is demanding a piece of you to give out. At this place and time, it seemed incredibly impossible to be at complete peace. You could almost give in— tempted to lay in defeat. You gave it your all, and they gave you nothing.

“It’ll hurt for awhile, but it will get better,” you suddenly broke the silence. Namjoon hummed back, either confused or surprised at the sudden remark. You turned sideways and up, to look at the view of his jaw. He tips his head back, drinking down the soda in his left hand. The thin fabrics of his sleeveless tanks, left almost nothing to the imagination. He tutted his tongue in response to what you said.

“That’s a nice saying…” his voice dropped an octave lower when he is relaxing like this with you. You were the few humans in the world he would appreciate silence with. You switched to face him, him between your legs as you sat up with a big gaping smile on your face, disbelieved.

“You’re the one who told me that…” emphasizing on him. You filled the gaps between his legs with your own, sandwiched as you sat opposed to him. Your toes next to his head and him grinning like he kept a secret from the world. After much struggle to get comfortable, you said,

“You told me that when my grandmother passed away that night in January… I remember it clearly, just like it was yesterday…

I was in the elevator with her lifeless body on the casket and not a drop of tears left my eye…

I started wondering if there was something wrong with me…”

Namjoon wrapped his palm over your ankles— the ankles you hated so much because you think they are unappealing, he thumbs the protruding bone affectionately, brought it to his stomach and started massaging it with his free hand. All the while you were reminiscing.

“And you told me that I was so hurt, I couldn’t cry. How I am used to fabricating my pain for the sake of others… that when I was expected to cry, I couldn’t. And wouldn’t. How I took being strong quite literally…” Your voice slowed down, your eyes casted to the view of his fingers, nimbling over your skin.

“And today, the same thing happened… but today, I chose not to be too strong,” you held your breath for a moment, and exhaled shakily. The emotions aren’t all gone; the remnants are still here, clinging on you like a stubborn stain on the wall left by the old frames that were no longer there. Coiling around you like a shadow at every hint of bright light. The guilt was paralyzing you to the point of tears.

“A friend of mine was taken today…” you painted a smile on your face but Namjoon didn’t etch one, one bit. His fingers stopped massaging briefly, before it continued.

“You’ve met him once, if you remembered, his name is Hoseok,” you wiped a single drop of tear, “He was a firm owner, a lawyer. We met at the convention…”

“... back in 2015.” Namjoon finished your sentences.

At the 2015 International Pharmaceutical Convention, 7 years ago...

Flourishing, the crowd of intelligent people came in with a big proud smile, wearing lanyards of their company. Blazers, heels, jewelries, research posters, new pharmaceutical breakthroughs, projects and investors circles. The big pharma are divided in sections.

Walking toward the condiments vendor for a quick refreshment, you were approached by a man. Tall, his face turned away from your view as he was speaking to another colleague. He hijacked your turn to access the vendors, unknowingly, and you weren’t exactly the kind to speak up when a stranger does this to you, so you backed away a little and forced out a smile, gazing down at your toes.

“Hey, I think I know your name…” this mysterious figure suddenly says, “Still letting others go first before you, huh?” In such a friendly tone, your mind began racing to decipher his voice and face when you shot your gaze up to meet his. The same disarming smile, perfectly lined teeth and just the right amount of cologne, wafted around your nose— was a face familiar from the years back.

“Hoseok? Jung Hoseok?” he mentions his name after a long pause from you.

You were tongue-tied, mind-riddled from such a sudden meeting. You were unprepared and it must have shown all over your face the way he hisses away, wearing a lopsided smile and gruffly saying, “Don’t be like that… Do you really not know me? Have I mistook you for someone else?” He suddenly shifted his weight to another foot, crossed his arm and placed his forefinger under his chin, gazing at the corner of the massive hall, thinking.

“Ankles, and that old wristwatch, it’s definitely you…” his pondering face switches to a cheerful smile in a matter of seconds and you could not have been even more right that this was your old friend whom you hadn’t contacted in years. All the way back in college.

“Oh my, it’s you…!” You gasped, trying to recover from the embarrassing delay, “Wow, you look amazing… How are you! How have you been?”

Hoseok exchanged your late recalling with a burst of laughter of his own.

“I own a firm now,” you heard him say. It was the first thing he said, and it showed just how much pride he took in it. Which was fair. Back then he was struggling to find his footing, trying to find a job and getting rejected at interviews— it was you whom he shared those stories with. Over late night coffee, late night conversations and texts; he talks about his days, sharing with you his strange humors. You were glad that he finally found what he liked to do; at least that's what you assumed he liked because you clearly remembered that he had different interests.

“So what about the photography business? Your freelance job?” you hesitantly asked.

You could see how his smile and whole stature faltered briefly at the mention of it. You knew that his family was against it— was against anything that isn’t bringing back money— passion or not, it wasn’t something his family wanted him to do. Besides, his father’s firm needs managing, and what other way to continue the business if not having a son that is doing law as well.

“Folded,” his cheeks puffed and deflated, “Sold everything including the antique camera, the analogues, the films… everything.”

Your heart thudded strangely. You knew just how much he loved photography. It was the reason why you both got close back then. Your passion to everything artistic and his passion to capture everything beautiful. You remember so well, how his face lights up at the mention of photography, how he was so willing to teach you how to use the cameras you’ve never seen, and how he shares all his work with you, including the new one he was currently working on. You had access to all of his digital work and manuscript. And it was unfortunate that all these had to go away, leaving nothing to the memory. Nothing to hold close. It probably killed him as well. But what could he have done?

“How about you?” the conversation now shifts to your side. You twisted the ring around your ring finger and showed it to him.

“Awesome!” He gleams. So delighted.

“He is here somewhere, I don’t know where he went… but he should find me in a few minutes,” you looked around.

“You were getting something from the vendor?” Hoseok asked, but you shook your head. You don’t feel like drinking now.

Hoseok gradually finds out how your life is, where you’ve worked and places you’ve been.

“And you met Namjoon at work?”

“Pretty much, he is in the investors group. We met once, talking about a big pharma project and he was one of the champions supporting the good cause, so I owed him a lot,” you shrugged as to say, the rest is history.

“So he made you marry him to pay up all your emotional debts?” Hoseok jokes.

“Not exactly but… you know how I am. I can be very difficult to convince, especially when I am so comfortable with the lifestyles I already have. I dread to be a housewife so when he understood that, everything else falls into place,” you added and caught a tall figure walking along the hallway, dashing in his slick back hair, lanyards dangling.

Blazers flailing, white dress shirt and slacks make up the shapes of his defined abs and thighs. He walks with his head hanging slightly downwards as if he was trying not to catch anyone’s attention but was failing. Everyone turned their head towards him the moment he stepped inside the hall.

He stopped midway and tugged his left sleeve back. His Patek Phillipe Nautilus shimmering handsomely under the spotlight as he studied the time. He lifts his eyes up to scan the room through his brows and pursed lips, wondering where his wife was at the promised time.

You raised your arm slightly and the smoldering figure of a man twitches a big smile and a small bite on his lower lip, making his way to you. Completely aware about the man that was nearby you as he plants a chaste, enveloping kiss on your lips.

“This is Namjoon, Kim Namjoon…” You placed your hand on the small of his back and he reached out to Hoseok first for a handshake, again, his wristwatch peeking out when he covers the handshake with the left hand.

“Sweetheart, this is Hoseok, Jung Hoseok. He is a lawyer…” you introduced them both and Hoseok handed him his name card. Namjoon waits for you to further elaborate how you seemed so friendly with this man. And you can’t say that Hoseok was in-fact your old best friend whom you cut connections with because you’ve had feelings for him when he was in love with someone else. So you say, “An old friend.”

You sighed in relief when Namjoon didn’t catch the extended pause, but you can’t help thinking that he might question more later in the ride home. But for now, Namjoon’s bright smile seems to captivate the whole room’s attention. Small talks, and brief discussion about the direction of the convention and what he thinks about it, comes naturally. But he makes sure you don’t feel left out by the conversation by constantly adding your pharma company name in the picture.

“Had it not been my darling, the company would have gone downhill with their outdated scheduling methods and utter refusal to accept reformations according to modernization,” Namjoon added, and while he says so, so professionally and with full alluring prospects of a seasoned business man, his hand was trailing down the curve of your ass and gently squeezing them— out of Hoseok’s sight. Had you been a terrible pretender, you would have moaned out of context. You can thank your overflowing control for that. You were also cursing his name in the back of your mind and he will have an earful of it when you get home later.

“She single-handedly save the multi-billionaire company from their biggest downfall from the company’s incompetent leader,” Hoseok added, “Also they had a lot of legal issues at the time. I was in-charge of the corporate files before they shifted to joint-venture with Daehan Pharmaceuticals… it was a mess already. Corruption, bribes and unreliable auditing data.”

“Wait…” you intruded, “You were in the pharma that long? So we could have met?”

Hoseok gave you a lopsided smile and nodded. He further explained how he kept sending his colleagues to do site visits because he wants to avoid seeing you. This is where Namjoon begins to realise that you guys might be more than just friends because he asked,

“Why is that?”

Hoseok began his answer with a shrug of his shoulder and pursing his lips. After a brief thought, he admits, “Because at the time, we weren’t talking anymore. She would know why,” He opens his mouth to say more, but glancing down at your wedding ring, he didn’t.

If Hoseok remembered clearly, he was talking to you about a girl he had been pursuing. It was the first time he ever revealed something like that, all along you knew each other. You were studying for your final year and had been bludgeoned with assignments. There wasn’t a right time to tell you until one day on April 17th, he said he was finally going to ask this girl if she would be his girlfriend. A little info on her was that she was in a toxic relationship she was trying to get out from. She didn’t ask Hoseok to wait, but Hoseok was so in love with her, he didn’t mind how long it would take. She requested for time and space. Another man claimed her as his girlfriend when she didn’t say yes or no. Another two were also after her. Her ex boyfriend returned after months of leaving her. Just at the same time Hoseok was allowing her in his life.

When he shared you that information, you felt so betrayed somehow. He was always preaching about how being single is the best way to live and he turned around and did things like this. Pursuing a relationship. You were stubborn, you had egos you wanted to defend. Everything regarding relationships, you refuse to acknowledge. And any slight differences in your opinions were enough to break a relationship, even a strong friendship like you and Hoseok shared at the time. You once confessed to Hoseok that you liked him and he couldn’t return the same feelings. So you accused him of loving someone else and he denied that. When this happened, you felt like you were lied to. Because Hoseok, at the time that you two knew each other, was already having eyes on someone else, treating you as a placeholder, sharing emotions until the girl was eventually available for him.

Then he dropped you.

Things would have been different if he just told the truth. That he was indeed in love with someone when you confessed to him. Things would be much easier and it wouldn’t have gone deeper than it was. You would have walked away, unhurt and without knowing each other at a depth that you’d have to crawl out from. But Hoseok didn’t want to lose you. For some reason, he kept the friendship despite being unable to return your feelings, fabricating attention and giving hopes that he might one day change his feelings. Had you walked out earlier, you wouldn’t have resorted to deleting all contacts with him. His Instagram account, all his numbers, his pictures, galleries. The assignments he helped you with, the emotional support, the ice cream dates and late night phone calls. You would take it all away.

You deleted him from your life, only for him to tiptoe around the same company as yours— afraid of being known but unsure of what he did wrong. You decided that you would punish him that way. By leaving him with no answers of why you left.

“Will you be joining the closing ceremony dinner at Hyatt?” Namjoon politely asked. Noticing that the conversation had run down.

“Perhaps I will. I have to keep the firm going for the wife and kids to eat,” Hoseok perked up, and it was the first time he ever revealed about his marital status all through the conversation.

“Oh, you married her?” the delight in your voice was sincere, you are so happy for him. But his answers weren’t what you expected.

“No I didn’t. She left me for someone else, she was never honest with me, and I was only hearing the things I wanted to hear,” Hoseok rubs his knuckle and politely excused himself when he saw Namjoon was approached by an entourage of bodyguards that guide you and your husband to the next section of the convention. No numbers were exchanged to insinuate a rekindled relationship. It’s like you both understood that you could never return to what you were before. You both are leading different lives now, with different people and different phases. But you hoped he knew just how much he meant to you back then.

Hoseok walked away with a lightened shoulders. Now that he has seen you face-to-face and sure of what life you’re living, he felt a little at ease and a little envious. In the car you once rode with him, this broken-down Honda Civic, divorce papers were scattered on the front seat. The top-most letter being the child custody granted to his wife. His firm is also on the verge of bankruptcy and he was laid off from his contract with the pharma, this convention being the last one he will ever attend. After you left his life, he was burdened with one bad luck after the other. And he was at his last strand of hope when he came to the building. He saw you gracefully presenting on the stage about the medication you have been working on, like how he always wished to see. You were so cool, so engaging, so intelligent in your presence. Namjoon is the ultimate husband you wished for, and of course, you would concede for a man that was at your level. Knowing you as long as he did, you will not settle for less and that’s final. No discussion.

Life is good for you.

Inserting his car keys inside the keyhole, telling himself that, “That’s the price of breaking a pure heart.”

Empty bottle of soda laying on the wooden panel. Your tear-stained face, sleeping on your side under the starry night sky, while Namjoon watched you intently. He covers you with a blanket and lets you sleep. He walked inside the house, and vanished to his home office. In it, he fetches his phone and turns on his table lamp, making a call that was immediately taken.

“I want you to find the burial information on a lawyer Jung Hoseok and send some condolences bouquet,” he instructed with a low voice. The short voice call felt heavy but necessary. Hoseok’s passing was detrimental to his wife’s mental and emotional health— it was important for him and her to get the closure they both needed.

Judging from her frail figure, she won’t be able to attend the funeral. Cremation was planned as requested by Hoseok. His children will not be attending, neither is his wife. The last thing Hoseok wanted was his funeral attended by the people that was the reason for his passing. For years, he had been battling depression and anxiety. It has been a long, lonely fight.

Namjoon watches the silhouette of you, standing against the setting sun, in your all-black attire and hair tied in a bun, hugging yourself. Wind blowing the strands of your hair back at every strike. Your diamond ring twinkling at the light it reflects. The sound of traffic in the distance, honks and vehicles throttling far away.

“The funeral ended gracefully…” Namjoon broke the silence.

You dropped your head and tutted your tongue, smiling weakly.

“It’s not your fault, darling…” your husband’s footsteps padded through the wooden floors to where you were.

“Then why does it hurt so bad? Why does it still hurt so Goddamn much?!” you shrieked.

Namjoon collected you in his arms, so you would rest your head on his sturdy chest, and he whispered, barely audibly heard by you,

“Because when you love, you love with everything you have. I know that much.”

It was then he realized that one is only allowed the closure they deserved;

And, no closure is also a closure.

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copyright © january 4th, 2021 namjoonchronicles do not repost, and thank you for reading <3

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↳ author’s note it's been awhile, i feel like i've been waiting for my personal life to overflow before i could write something. this is just an excuse to use 'that' picture of namjoon for the banner of a story. how are you? i've recently cut contacts with someone i hold dearly in my life. upon the break, it gave me back the emotions i used to have when i am writing. all this while, i have wasted my feeling, my elaborated word choices on someone who hardly appreciate it. with him gone, i started to think clearer and see things for what they are. i am no longer shrouded by dark grey clouds of uncertainty as i was with him. it was a difficult shift, but i feel better now that he is gone from my life. i dropped a tear or two not because of the love i used to feel for him, but because i felt incapable of being loved the way i yearned. this is the second day after i broke all connection with the said man/boy/creature. i feel liberated after the whole story was written. i needed him killed in my mind. so i wrote it just that. i've returned to where i was before, and i feel absolutely fine.